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crapcafe · 4 months

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hearing people talking about cooking is always such an interesting topic and i'm gonna take a min to ramble about it. i learned how to cook (eggs and pasta mostly) as a kid from my mom because she learned to cook at a young age as well and she would also be gone on work trips pretty often. later on in life i worked in restaurant kitchens as a kitchen manager and a line cook. i've even had the displeasure of working alongside new hire line cooks that don't fucking know how to cook but figure that they can still do the job (they could not)

some things just become intuitive so it's hard for me to remember exactly what i needed to focus on learning and what did just come naturally from the start, but a lot of it relates to just general science/chemistry knowledge. denser items will take longer to cook than less dense things (potatoes take forfuckingever but sliced button mushrooms take like a minute or two), high heat makes things cook way faster so liquids will boil off sooner, dense items will sear/burn quicker, and thin/small things will just burn. some professional cooks don't even know this based on the amount of times i've had to talk coworkers out of turning the fryer temp higher because things were taking a long time to cook (this is a great way to get a nice crispy skin on some shit that's still frozen in the middle)

there's a lot of learning how to read recipes. abbreviations (sometimes tablespoon is T or tb or TBSP or Tbs), how to adjust amounts if you need more or less of something, looking up substitutions for things (if you don't have milk but need to make a cream sauce, using applesauce instead of oil or butter or eggs in some baking recipes, etc). its definitely a skill to know how to read some recipes, and coming in with your own knowledge is great, but it's another instance of "you need to learn the rules to know how to break them." this is how you get the screenshots of ppl substituting kale in their banana cookie recipes and then wondering why they suck

thinking of foods in terms of nutritional value can also be helpful. if you have tortilla chips and salsa youre technically getting some vegetables in you. frozen and dried fruits and veggies are still fruits and veggies. rice and beans is grains and protein. miso soup with tofu and spinach is lots of protein and iron. romaine salad with balsamic vin, olive oil, feta, and tomatoes is some vitamins and fats and calcium but without grains and fiber it wont give you too much energy so have some bread or something with it. moving away from processed food will make you feel better. apple slice and peanut butter is my new depression meal bc it makes me feel more alive than shredded cheese from the bag and you can feel like a roman emperor a bit.

if you're just starting out learning how to cook: try to keep it simple with starch + veggie + protein (veggie pasta is a staple classic, roast some stuff and toss it with pasta and garlic and olive oil), find something with just a handful of ingredients that you actually want to eat. the act of cooking can be fun but not everyone thinks its fun, so at least make sure you'll want to eat the final product. if there's any sauces you really like try to keep some on hand. gochujang+soy sauce+sesame oil+sugar+broth can be really good in a stir fry, and basically all of those things will last a long time.

anyway theres a lot of text about cooking. theres a reason i stayed working in kitchens for almost 5 years despite how shit working in kitchens is. i like food and cooking. its one of the few things humans have been doing for a bajillion years and its necessary to live a healthy life and if you can find some fun and peace in the process then thats even better. theres no shame in not knowing how to cook but there is shame in refusing to try and learn imo

insert senshi page about eating well and exercising regularly to live a healthy life

#personal #i cant remember the last time i made a text post on here

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equallyshaw · 5 months

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star crossed lovers au | connor bedard x kailey hughes au ↳ cat distribution system. ↳ blurb! (yes, i know these cats are not the same size. pls disregard lol) ↳ au masterlist!

word count: 646 warnings: none!

connor could not believe it, and possibly a part of him did not want it to be true. not that he did not like cats, they just were not his favorite animal. he was quite partial to dogs. so when kailey and connor were taking a walk through the loop after a short study session at the depaul library, kailey knew she could not give up this chance encounter. "oh my god con, look!" she squealed as she kneeled, before putting her finger out for the small cat to sniff her. "i don't think you should do that." he said taking a step back. she rolled her eyes, but then smirked as the cat began to brush itself up against kailey. "hi baby." she cooed, and began to pet it. "step on it bedard, get your car." she said not looking up from the black cat. "what?" he questioned, squatting down to her level. she turned back towards him, "im gonna stay here. you go get your car so we can get to the vet." she explained as if it was not obvious. "wait why?!" he asked still confused. "because con, the cat distribution system that I've been waiting for to appear, has happened! i cant give this cat up. look!" she said looking down at the cat. the cat had now taken up her lap as a safe haven, and connor knew there would be no going back now. she was hooked, and godddamit- she was gonna keep that cat.

it was 3 hours later, with a $465 vet visit and connor getting scratched in the room behind them- the two finally settled in on kaileys bed. kailey and connor laid down cuddling together, while the new kitten - notably named crosby laid in front of them in a ball. "i cant believe it happened." she whispered, intently watching the cat's chest rise and fall. "do lukas and kev like cats?" she questioned, absentmindedly. "uh, i don't know. the topic has never come up." he teased, pressing his nose in the nook of her neck from behind. "what if i brought her over tomorrow?" she questioned, and connor smiled. "im sure they would love to meet her." he mused, which made kailey silently cheer. "oh shoot! i completely forgot to let my brothers know." she giggled, pulling out her phone to shoot off a text to their group chat, that the four of them had. not even a minute later, the three brothers were texting like madmen. asking when they could meet her, but at the same time insulting kailey that she got a kitten and not a puppy, and lastly, they wanted to know the name. to which, luke guessed correctly. "what is with crosby?" connor questioned after she put down her phone, and she giggled. then she would not stop giggling, until she realized that baby crosby might wake up, so she stopped quickly. though, connor thought it was all quite amusing.

"as a kid we met crosby before i had a real understanding of who he was, and then was i was like 13 i saw a picture of him and thought he was the hottest man to grace this earth." she said turning around to face connor. "and then i met him again right before jacks draft, and my brothers had to tease me relentlessly about it. completely made a fool of myself in front of him and I've never lived it down to this day." she said as her cheeks turned rosy, which connor found quite darling. "that's adorable." he teased, moving a small piece of hair behind her ear. she pushed two hands to her face to cover herself from embarrassment, "what? it is cute." he said pulling them from her face, and then slowly leaned down to kiss her. but, before he connected the two he teased her a bit more. "though ill be sure to remember that you found him attractive...the next time he's in town." he teased before kissing her.

that kiss didn't last long.

just something cute between the two! please like and reblog if you enjoyed!

also posted a day early, who'd a thought? lol

#connor bedard #connor bedard au #star crossed lovers au #connor bedard x k hughes au #connor bedard fic #connor bedard blurb #connor bedard imagine #chicago blackhawks #nhl #hockey #hockey fic #hockey blurb #hockey imagine #nhl imagine #nhl blurb #equallyshaw masterlist

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mebemilena · 4 months

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I'm loving all your Maya Lopez stories. They are amazing!!

"I hope you know that this has nothing to do with you"

A/N/: This was gonna be smut but i decided to have it on a chapter of it's own, in case some of you who have followed this storyline dont read smut.

To the sweet anon that sent me a message, this is for you.

Friendly reminder: i write on the drafts of my email so i can edit anytime before posting. It turns out sometimes i cant proof read it and some grammar and spelling mistakes go unnoticed. i'm trying to pay more attention and let the text rest for at least a few hours before reading it to corret. Might edit the past chapters soon.

Tittle from Big girls don Cry, by Fergie.

- - -

Though Maya had told you to leave by the morning without breakfast, you were adamant about cooking her something.

"Why are you so stuborn?", she signed while you fried some eggs and bacon, the smell of fresh coffee spreading through the small kitchen of her childhood house.

You looked at her all heart eyes, like she put the stars on the sky, and that was clearly bothering her. You filled her a plate and smiled lovingly.

"Stop looking at me like that.", she frowned at you.

You noticed Maya was in a very bad mood, which didnt make much sense to you. She had kissed you last night, cuddled you on your sleep and left a kiss to your neck before getting up this morning. Not even an hour later, here she is. Staring daggers at you.

"What's wrong?", you asked but Maya just looked away. You walked closer, standing in front of her as she avvoided your eyes.

You tapped her nose with your index finger, getting her attention and making her face you. "Look at me?", you asked.

Maya kept staring at you, waiting for you to say whatever you wanted to. "Look, if we play our cards right, everything will turn out well." , you tried to convince her.

"This is not a game. And I'm not a prize.", she told you, arching an eyebrown. Was she talking about Fisk offering money to whoever found her?

You rolled your eyes. Who was being stubborn now?

"You're not a prize, Maya. You're..." you started but paused. You kept looking at her, deep in thought.

"What?", she asked.

"I forgot the sign for that.", you tried.

Maya huffed.

- - -

At noon, it started to rain. You made sure to close the windows before going up to Maya. She was standing against the back of the couch, watching the rain fall down on the outside of the house.

"This is perfect.", you told her. The rain falling and the smell of wet grass embracing your nostrils made you a little clingy.

Maya looked at you, a strange look adorning her bautiful face. She seemed sad.

Right there and then, you were sure she was gonna simply tell you to forget about her, to move on and leave Tamaha. You thought she'd tell you that she didn't like you anymore, tell you to leave her alone and go back to New York.

Then you'd go right away, walking in the pouring rain and crying your heart out. And it'd be like a sad romance movie.

But she did the oposite of that.

Maya tugged at the hem of your shirt, pulling you to be in front of her, and brought you closer, hiding her face on your neck. She inhaled your scent and you remembered why you hadn't change your perfume in such a long time.

It was something you thought would work when you started flirting. Picking a smell that'd make her think of you whenever she smelled it. That's why you walk around with tangerine essential oil on your clothes and inside the necklace you're always wearing.

- - -

When you first met Maya she always kept a serious face. As you became close, she'd show you a softer side and you'd take the opportunity to actually learn more about her.

You had met many versions of Maya and you loved all of them, though you'd seek a few of them more often than the others.

Fierce Maya was one of your favorites. She'd keep her chin up, lips sealed and a perfect eyebrown arched, looking into your eyes like she could make your soul bend to her own desire.

Funny Maya was all sarcasm and light teasing. She'd smile wild watching you trying to understand a joke she just told. She'd playfully bump your shoulder with her own and she'd even wink at you while at work.

You loved all versions of her, but right now you'd love to have Sexual Maya. The one with wet kisses and a dirty mind, the one that'd make you scream filthy words in three different languages while making you go over the moon.

Maya was a sweet lover but she did have her moments of pure desire. "It's just sex, this is not a relationship", she had told you when you first started your thing.

At that time you only understood the word "sex" and "relationship".

- - -

" i missed you too.", she started. "But it wasn't fair to bring you into all of it. I wanted to keep you safe.", she explained.

You heart grew ten times. Maya telling you she cared for you made you believe things could work out again. Screw Kingpin and New York, you could restart in Tamaha. You'd restart in a small iglu in Alaska, dressed as a polar bear, if she'd have you.

"I want you.', Maya signed, bringing you to reality, her eyes full of something you were yet to understand. "All of you.", she continued before claiming your lips with her own, taking your breath away.

Check out my redbubble shop: https://www.redbubble.com/people/MilenaFernandes/shop?asc=u

toss a coin to your artist (me) at ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/mebemilena

#maya lopez x reader #maya lopez #marvel women #marvel echo #maya lopez fanfiction

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kingkennny10 · 10 months

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Please Please Please

SP Apocalypse AU

Pt. 1 Inseparable

this is in fact the teaser to my apocalypse au with poly stenny, i have so much planned out for this and i couldnt be anymore excited, comment characters you wanna see, also, for some it might be a lil confusing reading cause im not gonna write it linear with one set group, youre gonna see other groups aswell, maybe a couple little sub plots here n there 😈

gn!reader, in future chapters there will be plenty of gore!! But not this one 🥱

I remember when we were all kids and used to hang out. Me, Stan, Kenny, Kyle, Eric, and Butters. Playing whatever made up game we could think of. Sometimes playing horse at the basketball court. It was a lot of fun back then, we thought nothing could ever separate us.

Middle school came along and it kinda did split us up, Kyle and Stan became their own little duo, they got tired of Erics crazy schemes. Me, Kenny, Eric and Butters stuck for a while still doing some of the old things we used to do all together.

High school came next and I ended up getting real close with Tolkien, Jimmy and the rest of their friends. We all got super close for a while. No one wanted to be around Eric anymore, he never changed. I ended up seeing Stan and Kyle more at that time because Stan picked up a job at the Tweaks Coffee Shop which led them to get close with Tweek and Craig. Kenny really only hung out with Butters by then, sometimes we would make passing conversations in the halls. Eventually when graduation came around it was just me, Jimmy, Tolkien and Clyde. Clyde left too after a couple months, he was always too busy to actually be friends with us.

After around a year and a half I could still see Stan whenever I’d pop in randomly at the Tweak’s coffee shop, found out him and Ike got real close. Butters still worked at the ice cream parlor that me Jimmy and Tolkien would catch up at maybe once a month. We stopped seeing Tolkien after he left for the police academy, he would still text at random times to check up on us. Since then the last I’d heard about everyone was that Kenny and Butters were living together, and that Kyle and Stan bought back the original Marsh family home together. Im glad there’s still remnants of the old group, maybe we are inseparable after all.

alright fellas, this is the first lil teaser snippet, this au is my baby rn, i have the next like 3 chapters set for it BUT i think ima post on wednesdays only, so tomorrow you will get another chapter! doin slow posts cause im just a lil bit evil and dont wanna burn myself out, in typical me fashion this au does have a whole damn playlist, cause lord knows i cant live without music 🙄

#south park #south park x reader #kenny mccormick #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny x reader #south park kenny #stan marsh #south park stan #stan marsh x reader #Please x 3 #apocalypse au #px3 #poly!stenny x reader

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bbrissonn · 2 years

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for the me or him a blurb from when bren realized he was in love with yn for the first time

under the cut!

ouhhhh okay i love this idea anon ur amazing

warnings: bren being high and drunk, slight swearing, not proofread

"bren, what's going on?" you asked as you answered your phone late at night. your eyes were barely opened as you looked over at your alarm clock, 2:01 am.

"y/n/n! hi!"

"hi, bubs." you said with a sigh, a small laugh leaving your mouth.

"i need your help." he said, and you could hear the big smile on his face, making you shake your head a bit.

"bren, it's 2 in the morning--"

"i know that, that's why i need your help, dumb dumb. i dont know where i am and uhhh i cant drive."

"why cant you drive?" you asked confused as you heard him giggle a bit on the other of the phone.

"im a little high... and drunk." he said, more giggles leaving his mouth. you sighed a bit before answering him.

"send me your location, ill come get you."

"bren, buddy, be careful." you whisper shouted at the boy as he made his way inside his house, clearly not caring if he woke up the others.

"i am!" he said with a laugh, holding onto the walls so he didnt fall.

"oh boy." you whispered before approaching him and helping him sit down on the stairs so you could take off his shoes.

"hey! what are you doing?" he asked loudly as you undid his shoelace.

"im just taking off your shoes, b."

"you promise you wont steal them?"

"i pinky promise." you said with a laugh as you took off one of his shoe, before undoing his other shoelace. a couple of seconds later, you heard a door open upstairs and soon someone was standing at the top of the stairs.

"what the fuck is going on?" owen asked as you took off brendan's final shoe and helped him stand up.

"y/n/n came to rescue me!" he answered loudly, making owen jump a bit as you shake your head.

"you need help?" owen asked you, ignoring brendan who was trying to wrap his arms around owen's chest to give him a hug.

"stop pushing me away?" brendan whined before grabbed his arms.

"ill be okay, you can go back to sleep." you answered with a smile before dragging brendan to his room.

"good night, big dog!"

"'night, briss."

the next morning, brendan woke up with a pounding headache, making him let out a groan. he looked over to his bedside table to look at his clock, when he noticed the bottle of gatorade and post it note in front of it.

morning bren! hope your doing okay :) text me when you wake up <3 also there's a bottle of advil behind your clock there wasnt any space left here and since your blind i thought itd let you know

-y/n/n

brendan didnt remember much from last night, everything after 12 am beinf blank, he had no idea how he got home. after a couple of minutes, it clicked in his head that you were the one who brought him home, making his heart skip a couple of beats.

he quickly grabbed his phone, the bright light making his head pound even more, before clicking on your contact and calling you.

"hello?"

"hi." he said, his voice all raspy. you could tell he had just woken up, making you smile a bit.

“how you feeling?”

“meh, been better. thanks, by the way, for, uh, coming to get me last night... i’m sorry if i woke you up.” he quickly apologized, making you shake your head a bit as you let out a soft sigh.

“bren, it’s okay. i somewhat give a shit about you, i wouldn’t just let you out there on your own.” you joked, making you chuckle a bit. he was quiet for a bit making you a little worried.

him on the other hand, he felt his heart completely explode in his chest from your word. he knew that mike had called you about a week ago for the same reason, along with blanks and nolan, but you had left them alone to get home. you hadn’t done this for your own brother, but you had from him.

“bren, you okay?”

“huh? oh yeah, yeah i-- um, i’m good.” he stuttered, your voice bringing him out of his thoughts.

“mkay. listen i have to go meet mike, but i’ll come by after, alright? text me if you need anything for your head.” you said with a soft voice, making a soft big smile appear on his face.

“will do. drive safe.”

“always.” you said before hanging up the phone. brendan stared at the wall at the end of his bed, his phone still up to his ear, a big smile on his voice as your word played over and over in his head.

taglist <3 @mack-samo @hugheshugs @nickblankenburgg @studsccsnackavoybambi @blanksbae @bemybinarystar @ancient-remnants-of-love @power2myheart @emsully2002 @cuttergauth @jayda12 @marcoskasper @mackieraymonds @bowen-power @sidcrosbyspuck @arianabordeleau @bordeleau @sslafkovsky @dora-the-exploraah @sophia-bordeleau

#bri writes #brendan brisson #brendan brisson blurb #brendan brisson x reader #me or him

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imjustania · 6 months

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How to nail 💅your Essays

No matter if you’re in university or school, you will need to write a research paper. Now this post will be dedicated to a normal essay structure, if you need to write an essay based assignment on medical, biological, chemical, or any other science, you need to be more specific, as writing a lab report has a couple extra steps.

Now, you have an essay due in two weeks? A week? Tonight? I’ve been there and I share your pain. I am currently in my last year in university studying for bachelor degree in Marketing, and oh boy let me tell you, the amount of essays I had to write was unreal. Therefore, let me share with you some of my essays skills, to help your speed run your own assignment.

Step 1: OUTLINE IT!?

Ok i think so many of you out there are missing this step. You cant expect yourself to sit in front of the computer and start typing away your essay? No you cant do that. You need to spend a good amount of time sitting down and outlining your essay. Figure out what goes where, and what sources to use for each section. Luckily for you, you have me here to tell you the basic outline structure of every essay. It consists of the:

Table of content (depends on how professional your essay is asked for)

Introduction

Main body

Conclusion

… THATS IT! Only 4 sections (and a half) to write your essay. However of course there is more to write then just that. Lets break down those sections

1) Introduction: When writing the introduction for your essay, it's important to start off with a bang! You want to give your readers a glimpse of what's to come and hook their attention right from the beginning. Make sure to include a strong thesis statement that clearly states the main argument or purpose of your essay. To make it even more engaging, you can provide some background information about the topic and give a brief outline of the main points you'll be discussing in your essay. Therefore, every introduction should have an hook, explanation what you’re writing, what you think will be the result or what is the point you’re writing your essay, and outline all the points of the main body (but simplify them)

2) Main body: In each section of your essay, it's important to provide a detailed analysis and offer supporting evidence for the points you introduced at the beginning. Take each paragraph as a chance to present a single main idea or argument and support it with enough evidence, examples, or citations to back up your claim. To make sure your ideas flow smoothly, use clear and logical transitions between paragraphs. Lastly, remember to give credit to your sources and include proper references for any external information you include in your essay. Here are some side tips for you

Try to have at least a minimum of 3 main body paragraphs . Each paragraph should have one point which helps support your main hypothesis or reasons or this essay.

Each essay will have different main bodies, depending on the subject. Sometimes your main bodies will be dedicated to presenting information about your topic. So for example, as a marketer, I had to write many reports. Most reports written will always include a main analysis of the company (so SWOT, PESTEL, Stakeholder analysis, mission and vision of the company, etc). Depending on what the essay require you to do, you should consider to present your points in that order.

Even your main body should have a proper structure of introduction, main points, and the conclusion.

Don’t forget to have a proper in-text citations depending on which format you use.

3) Conclusion: A conclusion is a chance to wrap up your essay by summarizing the main points and restating the thesis statement. Remember not to introduce any new information here; instead, provide a concise summary of the arguments you've made throughout your essay. Furthermore, this is your chance to leave a lasting impression on your reader by offering insights, implications, or recommendations related to the topic. A well-written conclusion should leave your reader with a sense of closure and a clear understanding of the importance of your essay's content.

4) References: The references section of your essay is where you list all the sources you have cited or referenced. It's important because it helps readers find and verify the credibility of the sources you used. When writing the references section, make sure to follow the specific citation style required by your institution or professor, such as APA, MLA, or Chicago style. Include the author's name, publication year (if there is no publication year, then the article must not be reliable. It must always have a year), title of the source, publication information, and any other required details. Arrange the references alphabetically by the author's last name or by the title if there is no author (if there is no author try using the organisation or the website that published the text). Don't forget to double-check the formatting and punctuation for accuracy and consistency throughout the references section.

After your essay was outlines and you know exactly what you’re supposed to write… write it dude? Like you have the format, you have the sources, and you know your points. Just start writing… if you are having trouble getting started, then give a click to another one of my blogs on how to actually get started on studying.

If you want to go the extra mile, and also make the essay more professional here are some of my personal tips to accomplish that:

size 12 for normal text and size 14 for title (titles can be only bold)

Use text Times New Roman (ROMAN EMPIREEEEEEEEEE)

Double space of all essay

Have a cover page! You can find templates in the insert section of the word tabs.

Have numbers tag the foot of the page

And thats all for today folks! Hope this is actually useful to you, and if you are struggling with anything specific, then do let me know in the comment section or send me a question through the tumblr! Now thank you for reading, and leaving likes <3 don't forget to smile, because you’re beautiful.

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golbrocklovely · 1 year

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since i have nothing else to post right now…

here’s the last of colby’s tweets from 2020.

i don’t have proof that these are his tweets, but believe me, they are his.

if it’s bold and italicized, it’s someone’s tweet to him.

if it’s in (), that’s just me commenting lol

added bonus: if they have a * next to them, that means it’s been deleted

~~~~~~~~~~

Oct. 1 - love doing things for myself

Oct. 4 - i’m in so much pain. sos

fan: u ok?

poison oak. everywhere …. everywhere.

Oct. 5 - i like the simple things

Oct. 7 - less is more

Oct. 10 - i wanna make you happy

how am i so busy during the day but still manage to find 2 hours to mindlessly scroll through tik tok? i can’t be the only one

Oct. 14 - i care too much

Oct. 15 - somehow it wasn’t enough

Oct. 18 - fan: I CANT BE THE ONLY ONE WHO ALWAYS WONDERED WHAT COLBY SMELLED LIKE..I WANA KNOW WHAT COLOGNE HE WEARS

mayonnaise

(i hate this man so much lmao)

Oct. 19 - Justin Bieber’s new song made me tear up, that dudes been through so much. no one could even imagine what that’s like.. achieving everything and being in the biggest spotlight at such a young age.

Oct. 20 - @/samgolbach: less than 6 months ago i broke my back. and i decided to take that as a challenge to get healthy again. and today i ran the fastest mile i’ve ever run. so yes, i might be an idiot but i’m a determined idiot 🤘🏼🏃🏼

🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 that’s an insane accomplishment ! i remember when it was a struggle to stand up out of bed

new day, same cycle

Oct. 21 - my mom is texting me all the young pictures of me and it’s bringing me memories i didn’t know i had

Oct. 25 - panic attacks late at night are the worst

Nov. 1 - @/colbybrockscar: reminder that it’s no nut November!!! @/ColbyBrock doesn’t even have to try. He’s got this shit in the bag. It probs comes out like baby powder if he tries

did my car just roast me ?

Nov. 4 - this is scary

cuties! all 3 of you! (reply to fan in merch with friend and cat)

Nov. 6 - @/GracynCarr: I can’t believe the audacity of a high school tweet to pop up on my timeline lmao.. miss u tho @/ColbyBrock :)

hope you're well xx

Nov. 8 - so much talent thank youu love (reply to fan's art)

fan: Um. So I tweeted this to you before but alot has also changed since then sooo wanted to say thank you 🖤 🖤 @/ColbyBrock

proud of you, and good luck with your dreams darlin 🖤 you can accomplish anything with the right mindset and hard work. i believe in ya

time flies, and i’m so scared of losing my youth. it’s inevitable i know, but damn makes you wanna cherish every moment you got

Nov. 11 - i hate when nothing is wrong but nothing feels right

Nov. 12 - the person who makes you forget about the rest of the world

Nov. 13 - today marks 6 years since we posted our first YT video on the MAIN S&C account .. 🖤 what a wild ride

Nov. 14 - promise you i’m a good waste of time

Nov. 15 - @/katstuartmusic: “sunday is my funday” - colby brock 2020

🥂💁🏻‍♂️💁🏻‍♂️

fan: Colby u get drunk off of one white claw

fight me

other fan: my money is on mags

round house kicks to the face don’t feel too good

(is it bad that i like when colby gets weirdly violent with us sksksks)

Nov. 16 - the Why Dont We dudes are some of the nicest people in LA

*Nov. 17 - @/gabytriana: It’s out! Sam and Colby were so much fun to work with, and despite what Colby said, I did not hate him when we first met! 😆 Both he and Sam are super kind, smart, generous entertainers who know how to tell a good story! I love them both!! Happy Book Birthday, @/samandcolby

hahaha thank youu so much for all the hard work ! so excited it’s finally here

(interestingly enough, colby didn't delete his tweet… gaby did)

Nov. 19 - went to a Pyschic Reader tonight. my mind is blown. im not a skeptic anymore, video coming tomorrow

fan: Get ready for religious people to freak out

the psychic i talked to was religious, i’m not sure how but i think the two concepts can exist at the same time

Nov. 21 - hard to trust

fan: @/ColbyBrock hey, i love u lots

love you 🖤

Nov. 23 - fan: imagine if @/ColbyBrock responded to this

could you imagine

Nov. 24 - fan: lmao okay so my friend put this together when I FINALLY received Colby's reaper merch yesterday and I had to laugh, I am actually stupid. But I thought it was a lil funny so y'all can see it too then xx

hahahha love it. thank you. you’re not a sack of potatoes in my eyes

Nov. 27 - happy b day @/SamGolbach you know this and imma save the sappy shit for your big 25th bday but i wouldn’t be here without you. you’re the most intelligent, deep thinking dude i’ve ever met and i feel pretty damn lucky to be able to call you a business partner AND best friend

Nov. 28 - take it easy

Nov. 30 - should i hop back on tik tok?

Dec. 2 - @/aaron_doh: At least I got a photo shoot out of it 😄

whaaat. dude i wish you a speedy recovery

Dec. 3 - it’s hard to move on

Dec. 5 - a nice escape is all i need

welp. i guess i’m a lightweight

Dec. 9 - miss you

Dec. 14 - all the baggage that comes with me

Dec. 15 - been workin hard for you , announcement tomorrow

fan: omg are you pregaganant

how'd you know

@/samandcolby: announcement tomorrow… 2021 will be the best year of our lives (and probably most difficult)

fan: are we getting married?? is that why?

yes

i hate how having anxiety makes me nauseous. it’s the worst feeling

Dec. 16 - it’s all about living in the moment and making every. second. count.

fan: yeah @/ColbyBrock how much are you charging for tattoos…

free for you

Dec. 18 - big tool pic but i’ve been workin hard

@/mannymua733: we absolutely do not mind

hahahaha

(god damn… this pic is still so good lol)

also cold weather always makes me want a special someone to spend time with. cuddle buddy is neeeeeded

fan: okay but can we just take a second to appreciate how hard colby’s been working in the gym because dayum

thank you sweeeetheart

fan: HELP COLBY IS TRENDING

yoo i love you guys 🥺

Dec. 20 - got tatted last night and i barely remember

how i feel this morning (pic of him floating)

fan: you’ve seen elf on the shelf… but have you seen cole in a hole? (@/ColbyBrock)

i’m mad i laughed at this

Dec. 23 - why’d ya have to change on me

so bittersweet saying goodbye to my childhood home of 18 years… i’ll only be back to kansas to visit and sleep in hotels from now on. strange feeling, but so happy for my mom and dad for taking a chance and moving

it’s like i don’t have a real “home” anymore. since i move so much anyways it’s hard to find a spot to actually call home

fan: i just want to say that colby has helped me through so much this year. i had a tough year as many others did but you’ve seriously have helped me through so much. i love you so so much @/ColbyBrock

awh that’s why i make videos in the first place. for people like you

Dec. 24 - addicted to you

my mom and i are the weirdest duo on the planet when we’re together i swear

fan: Make a video with her for Christmas

my whole family despises being on camera 💔

Dec. 25 - fan: momma brock is the sweetest ever

she’s my favorite woman in the world

Merry Christmas friends ! 🖤

i wish i could have face tats for like one week but it doesn’t really work like that huh

Dec. 26 - everyone’s battling their own demons

Dec. 28 - fan: Colby drinking wine but he's such a lightweight that he's probably drunk, lmao @/ColbyBrock

🤫🤫🤫

fan: the vibes are fucking ethereal i’m guessing @/ColbyBrock

you got it

#colby brock #cb tweets #personal #text

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pasharuu · 1 year

Text

welps, since i got a little skrunkling in form of ararycan, lets talk about him. i hope it'll be a short one. (spoiler: no)

also to those who bumped onto my post in their or someone else's dash somehow: english is not my first language. so be ready for numerous "memories" and "forget" cuz my vocabulary is thin just like that. and some other weirdness of course.

first of all, i hate the dottore clone theory with every single cell in my body, and i want you to know that if you like it i dont care, so neither should you care about me hating it. im only speaking opinion here.

and also this is rather my headcanon just not to stay alongside with the mystery while theres a dottore theory around. i honestly dont believe in dottore theory, but i still cant prove it wrong properly due to lack of info, and that annoys me. but this headcanon doesnt attempt to debunk the theory somehow, these are just two completely different things not worth comparing.

but rlly, did anyone on that planet at least once look at ararycan's leaves more than once? cuz it feels like no one knows what is the form of the pattern. the theory followers say these are circles, on my plush these are rounded diamons. wtf dear fellow folks.

the headcanon is trying to explain ararycan's memory loss, as there is no information about this in the game. traveler and paimon just decide that "welp, aranara are forgetful sometimes" though its not really true, but its really odd of them to leave us on this cliffhanger. i once said that aranara never forget stuff unless they meet some certain condition. i didnt explain that well last time so lemme speak a word (although its gonna be long i fear, so once again, the orange text is not necessary)

in the beginning we were given with the idea that aranara dont forget anything, or at least dont forget anything as easily as we do. this was really the very first fact i learned about them since i found messily written notes very soon after i began my first walkthrough of aranyaka (funfact: in russian localization its not clear who is the author of these if you only see the first set of it, and i definitely remember that i was not able to read the next page at a place, so i bet i found it even before meeting arama in the very first time. i also found it in the second time only after completing the entire questline so imagine my face at that moment), and author of the notes says that he doesnt forget things easily, but still decides to make records because its fun to do. basically saying that these lads dont ever need to record things up cuz they remember it all by themselves.

then, during the part where we help guys in mawtiyima forest, we were told about the inscriptions on the walls. aragaru says that these are made only for humans, because aranara will not forget, while people have all the possibility to. all the other inscriptions on walls, if we keep the spoken idea in mind, are clearly made for humans as well. the only weirdness in this part is inscriptions in old vanarana, cuz the only one who needs these during the quest is arama, and its not really clear who these were written to in the first place. but we still cant say these were definitely written for aranara, or maybe i need to research more.

the events of agnihatora sutra and vimana agama are the ones that made people think that aranara are forgetful. the second one is the mystery we are trying to solve in this article, but the first one told you everything you need, but its absolutely understandable if you didnt get it in the first time (neither did i if u wonder). in agnihatora sutra the three are aware that the thing theyre going to commit is gonna make them forget everything, so they were hinting it for us carefully, yet not saying directly that they will forget us. in the very end of this questline they tell us about the sacrifice they're going to commit, and that sacrifice is actually their memories, even though its not shown on screen, unlike the sacrifice of arana's memories to get the bija. that is why we were later told that these guys dont emember us while everyone else do.

also there's the fact araja troubles to remember the events of the past, but this dude actually grew into a tree, and just like i said in the cinnamon arama article, that might be the reason of his memory loss. araja also didnt forget everything that he had expirienced before he became a tree, as sometimes he still recalls to some things as his own memories.

after all, aranara gain actual power with memories and it would be weird if you'd randomly forget stuff and lose yo power just like that. they cherish memories more than anything, either these are good or bad, and the idea of forgetting is terrifying to them (the most memorable to me was the moment when arama complained about alcohol cuz it makes people forget stuff. paimon said that sometimes there are things people want to forget, but arama was still negative about that). well, actually there is a thing they cherish more. this thing is called "friendship", and the idea is that even if you forget something, there will be friends who'll remind you, so thats why they are more dear to aranara, even more than the memories. this is as well the idea of "the forest will remember" thing, cuz aranara are friends to all the plants, animals, some humans and each other, so theres just no possibility for the entire forest (all of these things) to forget something. but that still doesnt remove the importance of memories cuz these are power and these are memories, it'll take a lot of time to gain them back, so losing them is only worth when its absolutely necessary. also remember that stories and memories are not the same, so just summarizing things up to someone wont work.

and that concludes my orange explaination, now back to vimana agama mystery!!!!

so my take is that ararycan mustve sacrificed his memories for something. if we'll try to recreate the chronological order of the events of the past, we'll see that aralohita, who possibly was some sort of a buddy to ararycan, disappears after ararycan lost his memories. or if he lost part of them, its possible that aralohita disappeared prior to that. both versions explain why ararycan still remembers the solution to aralohita's riddles.

ararycan once says that he was the one who brought the ruin golem part into the secret cave, but for now he doesnt seem to be as strong, he rather acts like a very brave weakling. as we know, aranara gain power with memories, so no wonder ararycan is a weakling now, not remembering everything. but still, his awareness about some things looking familiar makes me think that he might have lost part of his memories, but how come?

we know that ararycan most likely was the third one alongside royinjan and amadhiah in the past, so all the vamadhas, including the one that was sealing the secret base, most likely were set after the childhood of the two, which means that might happened not too long ago. that might line up with a fact that pir kavikavus accident happened around the same time, because vamadhas were obviously set for reason. i recall ararycan saying that vamadhas are set when aranara dont want nara to enter some certain places, but says that he doesnt know who set these. so i think that actually could be ararycan, but since he lost his memories, no wonder he doesnt remember about it. and so uh, setting these could be resulted in memory loss as it might take some power. he probably did know that amiti device might be used for no good by some foes, so vamadhas are only set in places that either have amiti device fragments in them or places related to it somehow (and nowhere else, by the way, so vamadha is for sure some kind of ararakalari that both ararycan and aralohita used to wield). we can see the direct memory loss from using ararakalari in case of arama, when the one hit one of ruin guards really hard and returned back to goofy. we dont know how the memories amount needed to do some action is measured, but if we connect the dots, it all seems possible.

the only question left is why the heck did ararycan move the detail into the cave and the answer is i dont know. it was def moved before the cave was sealed since roy (seemingly) confirms this place not changing at all since he was a kid, and probably even before the kids found this cave because otherwise someone said something like "dude, i recall this place empty, but then somehow this huge detail appeared here, no clue how tho i dont remember". but why did ararycan move it there is forever a mystery it seems, unless aralohita is confirmed to be his accompany most of the time and prolly found alive ofc. aralohita might say something about it in that case, unless he forgot everything as well. but its all just my silly wishes.

also arama, while summarizing the places we shall visit, says that ararycan may know something about the sus person we were looking for. ararycan later confirms he used to help kids in vimara village cuz arana asked him, but thats all he says, none of details were thrown after that. his wording that marana avatar is capable of the trouble feels weird, but marana avatar to aranara is many things, not only the actual marana avatar, so he could be calling fatui like that. i now think that ararycan could possibly help us with finding out who the sus person is but for whatever reason it was cut down by his own troubling.

and i know that at this moment it feels like im just coping but idc. once again, my speculations have nothing to do with the dottore clone theory, its just a thing im rather comfortable with. fact of the day: dottore is my least favorite character in the entire genshin impact (among some that are somehow major) and i'll be quite disappointed if my precious ararycan turns out to be his clone or creation or whatever. i wont argue with it, i'll only throw, tear and murder.

and that concludes my tractate. it took me the whole day to put in words and i feel empty rn, especially since i dont know many words, and if you ever ask me why am i speaking english if i could just use my first language - none of your business. if u ask me why i made this tractate - none of your business. till the next time.

#genshin #genshin fanart #genshin impact #aranara #ararycan #i dont even know if i shall actually mention everyone else whos involved #i guess no cuz its not important to those who will search by tags #imagine you search up dottore and end up bumping into this #oops i already included the dottore word so it'll be indicated in the search results #congratulations to those who found it like that #thoughts

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vykko · 1 year

Text

Not going to lie, dyslexia is amazing as nobody in my school or life remembers it exists and if they do they pretend it isn’t a disability

it great like

Tiny letters for no reason that I have difficulty reading

Me trying to make my phone more accessible to myself is not as good as I want it because both, the lay out is not meant for big letters and it doesn’t apply it’s self to anything not deflauf on the phone LIKE GOOGLE

having to learn cursive just as it was no longer useful so now I write in semi cursive when tired or having to be quick, I can’t read cursive

having to ask people who know I’m dyslexic even as well to slow down multiple times when writing stuff

not spelling well so getting lower marks

its a pain in the arse to get my accommodations and ATAR is basically wanting me to get diagnosed again to get a lower word limit so fuck me I guess

I can write and spell well, buuuut because everyone else can write quickly I have to too so I cant read my notes and I’ve cried before because a teacher would slow down

I have to write my notes before the teacher says so, so I can have written before they ask if everyone’s done. Which if I say I’m not I get either have everyone now focusing on me or it’s kinda ingored

”why do you have someone scribe” we don’t have teacher aids in high school for some reason, and during exams yet again getting accommodations is incredibly difficult it was a very hard for me to just get word limits brought down

beimg forced to write rather then type because if the teacher lets us use computers people might play games so again fuck me

them trying to help me with effectively treating dyslexia like I I understood nothing in the English language. also we worked on vowels sounds for ab example of how they did stuff, first I’d done it for 2-3 years 2 yes pior in speech therapy and I was flying through the activities and instead of picking up that I already knew the basics they kept doing the basics

effctivly trying to teach someone who is having difficulties holding their breath underwater for the same time as everyone else by teaching them how to swim by scratch when they allready can swim

more gaint stuff but it gets more ableist so I’d not want to talk about here but later

Last one is the time they changed the daily noctice section telling us where to go when a teacher was away

everyone had difficulty reading it and I couldn’t read it at all and got mild headaches from eye strain, I got lost for 20 minutes because I had forgotten my teachers name and had to get others to read out the table for me and getting pointed I’m the wrong direction by myself

It happened again but it was fault of lazy admin

yeah but I have soo many more stuff on how dyslexia isn’t at least in my school, city, most standard books, old people, the special system at my school, most signs, weirdly a lot of dyslexia awareness stuff and much much more is not accommodated for

also why is dyslexia treated like it’s not a disability

Like if a website has a bad autocorrect system you can very easily tell how much difficulty I have eg

tumblr = good

Skype= BAD!!

like it’s so jarring when I go and write after texting because all of a sudden it’s incredibly hard to English

like if you want to see how kinda I write in pen but for typing either look at posts I made while tired or upset or I’ll take a screenshot of Skype messages

sorry for how long of a rant this is, it’s just infuriating how I honestly struggle because somehow I’m excepted to do as well as my peers WHEN I HAVE A LEARNING DISABILITY, honestly dyslexia isn’t hard to accommodate

#dyslexia awareness #dyslexia #tw ableism #dyslexia The disability that’s treated like it’s not

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corvidcall · 2 years

Note

Did you ever tell the story of why ******* kicked you out because she forgot to pick you up from work on here? I remember it happening in real time and it was not funny but in retrospect, it's 200 upvotes on reddit material lol

LMAO its so funny you censored her name. like shes gonna be here or something. cant let her know i still think shes a bitch!!!!!

anyway heres fun little anecdote about that time i was forced to move out, in the style of an aita post, fake names and all

AITA for being mad at my roommate for not driving my somewhere?

I (22nb) live with two roommates, Makenzie (22f) and Justin (19 trans m). We all met because we worked at the same place, and we've been living together for almost a year. Of the three of us, I'm the only one who has lived with roommates before, but I can't tell if I'm being TA here?

Makenzie is the only one of us who can drive, and she agreed when we moved in together that, if we gave her some money to buy her mom's car, then she would drive us places whenever she was able. I work a little over a mile away from our apartment, so I CAN walk, but since I get off work at around 9pm, and the sidewalks aren't really well-maintained (it's a really industrial part of town, so it's not GREAT for walking), she agreed that she would pick me up after work every day.

Last week, I got off work, and waited for her to show up, and she never came. I texted her a few times, and when she didn't respond after I'd been waiting for almost an hour, I texted that I would be walking home. Apparently, she'd fallen asleep, and midway through my walk home, she woke up, got in her car, and tried to come find me to drive me home. She couldn't find me (the sidewalk is really hard to see from the road, and it's extremely dark, so I'm not surprised), and then frantically tried to get a hold of me to make sure I wasn't dead. I didn't see her texts because I was 1. walking and 2. on the phone with my partner. When I got home, she was pissed that I made her worry. She thinks I did it on purpose to get revenge? I told her I was just busy, and she seemed to accept that, but today she and our other roommate sat me down and told me that I needed to find a new place to live, because "this wasn't working out."

According to her, I'm not entitled to a ride anywhere, so I had no right to be mad at her for not giving me a ride, and I certainly didn't have a right to make her think I was dead (I literally told her I was walking home??). She also brought up that I never do my chores on the chore wheel (she made the chore wheel without asking. She just announced that she'd made a chore wheel and I had to clean the living room, which I'm almost never in anyway) and that I owe her $200 (from when we adopted our cat, which I think is weird to bring up when you're trying to kick me out?? it's not like I'm gonna get to keep the cat). She's saying I'm entitled and inconsiderate, but I feel like she's punishing me for the fact that she flaked. AITA?

Edit: If it helps, she's flaked on rides before. A few months ago, she agreed to take me to the doctor, and then the day before my appointment, she told me she couldn't give me a ride. The reason she flaked was because she wanted to go to the weed dispensary instead :/ she said it was fine, because "your mom will just get you an uber anyway". My mom agreed to pay all my necessary expenses while I'm in school (I'm a full time student; she pays my rent and I use the money from my part time job to pay for my food) but she's not like. Rich. I don't feel good about just spending her money on stuff I don't have to.

UPDATE: Makenzie made a post on Facebook about how "it's so sad when someone would rather lose a friendship than admit they were wrong." I shouldn't have commented, but I did, asking her if she forgot we were facebook friends, and then I blocked her. In retrospect, I should have just blocked her without commenting, but I'm only human.

UPDATE 2: Well, I'm moving out. Justin started harassing me, accusing me of stealing his shampoo and letting the cat loose on purpose, neither of which I did. I have my own nicer shampoo, and I love cats (I just was asleep when he told me the cat was missing, because it was midnight and I wake up at 6 am to go to school. I guess the fact that I didn't immediately leap to my feet to find our cat means I wanted him dead???) Makenzie is refusing to give back my deposit, because she says she needs to have the carpets in my room professionally cleaned before a new roommate can move in. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. But I guess I'm willing to pay a couple hundred dollars to not deal with this anymore. Still, sucks. :/

#anime life #she only gave me like half of my deposit back :/#anyway their real names were madison and travis lol. sometimes i think about what happened and i get sooooo upset all over again #even though it literally doesnt matter #i dont even live in the same state as them anymore #honestly i think she and travis just resented me because i had the largest bedroom (even though i paid more in rent)#and they didnt think i worked as hard as them #they both had full time jobs and i had a part time job. but i was also a full time student!!!!!!!#i woke up at 6 am and when i worked i got back at 10 pm!!!!#but when i didnt work i was back home before either of them woke up.#so i guess to them my school time just. didnt count???#also they were mad i kept asking them to keep it down at night. even though they KNEW that i was going to need that when we all moved in #i dont know how many times i can tell a person that i have to be up at 6 so i can catch my bus to school #so i need them to be quiet after midnight #ALSO ALSO neither of them had ever had weed before we moved in together and then they both started smoking ALL THE TIME #and they were absolutely fucking intolerable after that #frankly if i didnt already think weed should be legal nationwide. this would have convinced me that no one should ever have it #sorry. it makes you too annoying.#long post

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bunnygirlheart · 2 years

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post fulla questions i was tagged to answer by @bunnygirlbutta

What was your last…

Beverage: my black coffee that i let get cold :( i still drank it though

Phone call: not a clue. ive never liked phone calls,,

Text message: ‘‘...you know all about knot tying, huh? Glad to hear it‘‘

Song you listened to: soles - love will have its sacrifices (i was thinkin abt carmilla series)

Time you cried: if tearing up just a lil bit counts . it was around 5am and i was thinking about an incredible compliment i received from someone i love. if not then idk when it was, though i know what that one was about too.

Have you ever…

Dated someone twice? nope.

Kissed someone and regretted it? nope.

Lost someone special? hard to say.

Been depressed? and the scars to prove it,,,

Been drunk and threw up? no.

In the last year, have you…

…made a new friend? several i love yall 💜

…fallen out of love? nope

…laughed until you cried? i . dont think so?

…found out who your true friends are? dont know what this means

…found out someone was talking about you? no

General

How many people on your fb list do you know in real life? i am not on fb and would destroy their data centers given the easy opportunity

List 3 of your favourite colours: Purple!!! pink? green.

What was your first…

…surgery? n/a

…piercing? n/a (thatd be neat though)

…best friend? idk ?

…sport you joined? not a clue. i have never been into sports. dont remember the last time i touched anything of the sort

…vacation? hm. good question. i dont know that either

…pair of trainers? weird question and i don’t know it.

Right now, what are you…

…eating? nothin

…drinking? ^

…about to do? think abt kissing girls. ok no im doing that right now. so . maybe play terraria some more?

Your future

Do you want kids? makes me feel good to think about myself being a mother at some point in the future, but whether I actually would wanna have children ... idk. im only 23 though so like ....

Do you want to get married? if someone i love wants to marry me, I . huh. i was gonna say I wouldn’t be against it, but then it occurred to me, what if multiple people wanted to be married to me? i think thats not how it works? so . no i guess, on grounds of i dont wanna leave anyone out.

Ideal career? ... i have no clue what im doin yall

Which do you think is better…

…lips or eyes? well, vanya’s gotten me all caught up in kisses lately, so probably lips. eyes are lovely too though so idk really

…hugs or kisses? ^ that answers this well enough, but hugs are nice as well, so its hard to say for both of these.

…shorter or taller? yes? sounds good. real answer is i do not know. if youre notably taller or shorter than 6 ft pls come here so I can figure that out

…older or younger? too big of an age difference is weird,, anyway id say i dont care but i suppose .. the two people im most into right now are both a lil bit older than me so . maybe that says something. dont think so though

…romantic or spontaneous? im inexperienced in romance so i cant really say

…nice stomach or nice arms? hmmm well im a big fan of a good tummy c:

…sensitive or loud? idk what this means really

…hook up or relationship? relationship

…trouble maker or hesitant? i would like to cause more problems on purpose but i am v nervous always

Have you ever…

…kissed a stranger? no

…drank hard liquor? yes

…lost glasses/contacts? probably

…had sex on the first date? no

…broken someone’s heart? yes

…been arrested? no

…turned someone down? uuuhhh. maybe?

…cried when someone died? no

Do you believe in…

…yourself? trying to!

…miracles? define miracle

…love at first sight? no

…heaven? no

…Santa Claus? lmao no?

…kiss on the first date? why not, if it’s going that well?

…angels? no

#tagging . no one. dont feel like perpetuating this thing cx #oh but if you want to feel free to pretend i tagged you ig #serah i know i said i didnt wanna do this but i changed my mind i am doin it for you c:

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superbdinosaurdestiny · 11 days

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you are one fucking weird person who blocks me from everywhere then gets panicked when you don’t receive anything from me. Answer this question: how can I talk to you when I am blocked from everywhere? I have sent you new texts last week from instagram but then I found out I was blocked again. You blocked me in here, also blocked me as anon, I sent you a dm but you ignored bc you get scared of being expose which i never do this. So tell me you fucking moron how can I communicate with you? Do you want an architecture account that I post so you try to decipher the cryptic texts of mine? Do you believe yourself to do that? Bc last time you have failed, and seriously I burned my mind while try to understand yours. Oh once I made an account that was similars to yours, then you had reported me. I remember everything. 😒😒😒 Whatsoever, in short, blocking me from everywhere and then expecting me stay in touch with you as we used to do is stupid, unfair, ridiculous. Clean your shit. Sue them, then text me via dm (to my main ig) as a decent normal adult man. Thank you! 😒

ps: your death body doesn’t work for me bc dead people cant speak. I need you alive bc I have some simple questionsdd to you that im dying to find out the answers (just like how you found me at first, how did u feel when i followed u first etc..) and I hate funerals, cemetery. I don’t visit your grave blah blah bc I don’t even visit my grandparents. so keep urself alive. 😒😒

0 notes

pyrait · 9 months

Text

Friends after graduation

Kinda want to vent ab my uni friends

About a year ago, I finally agreed to go to my faculty's halloween party with my friends. This party is fucking big, like it's known in my city by every university student, tickets are super hard to get by, it's in a huge club and everybody dresses up.

Historically, ive hated parties. On one hand bc my alcoholic parents didnt give me the best experiences to handle drunk ppl, and on the other hand bc i had a lot of bad memories of when i used to black out when i was younger. But, this time, it was my last semester. I had only gone to this party on my first semester and ive become sober since, so i thought itd be a nice symbolic gesture to go, plus my friends really seemed to want me to.

Anyways, it's the party and im having a painfully normal time. I dont love dancing but i do like to talk to a lot of ppl, and i know a lot of ppl here. So i say hi to everyone i see and at one point i mix my main friend group and another couple of friends i know. I have to go to the bathroom, so i tell both groups and leave for a moment. When i come back, oh surpirse, literally not a soul on the dancefloor, not even a stranger.

Ofc, i start to panic. I don't remember if id ever told my friends, but another reason why i hate clubbing is bc, when i used to blackout, i usually did it with strangers. Strangers who obviously didnt care ab me, and basically left me to die everytime i got too drunk. This was kind of a trigger for me.

My phone was at 3%, and i've been left to die. Again. This time by my closest friends.

So i use my phone frantically to ask through the groupchat where everyone left to. Fortunately, it's inside the club. But, again, this club is huge.

They dont respond until after 15 minutes. They tell me where they are. I run. Theyre not there.

This goes on for literally an hour and a half. I couldnt go back home bc i didnt have my phone to ask for a taxi, and my friends didnt go looking after me even tho i was the only one who wasnt with the group.

By chance i find them and i start angry crying and scolding my friends as to why they left me alone. I told them that they knew how parties made me feel and they still cared more about themselves than me. One of them said "Sorry for leaving you, we just thought youd be perfectly fine on your own".

Now that i've been graduated from uni for ab six months, ive been feeling extra lonely bc im having a harder time socializing.

It's true what they say: once we´re all "adults", suddenly no one has time to hang out. It's not like we all have jobs, the majority including me's all unemployed and looking.

But i still see them posting pictures with eachother. They invite all eachother but me. They all support eachother in their crises but me.

Okay, about hanging out, maybe i havent been the most present friend. Im that type of person who loves you deeply regardless of how much we text or hang. But about treating eachothers crises, im always physically there. I send a little message, or i try to pay a visit.

This is not a victim competition, but some of my friends literally just break down for anything. And we're all still there reassuring them that we'll carry them.

For me, it's not the same. It seems like they feel the same way about leaving me alone at the club as they do for everything regarding me.

Even though I spent two months in bed and tried telling the people around me that i was going through a tough time and needed some support, no one came to ask me how i was doing. Like, why even try to bother when i got it perfectly all on my own.

I cant do it on my own. I need people. What do i have to do to be more lovable? What does their connection have that i cant fulfill?

#girlblogging #txt

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tay-bee · 10 months

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Fresh Start!

Finally finished cleaning this blog! Yeah I could’ve just picked up where I left off, but I wanted a fresh start (plus I didnt want cringe highschool Tay out there eagh)

I deleted all my reblogs up until the last few things- ive left up my own fanart I still kinda like, might keep some of the original art up but idk yet.

I think im going to update my theme but that can wait-

According to dates the last of my activity was 2018- not as far back as I thought! Some life updates below:

I turn 29 in a few days. Ive had this blog since I was 16?Wild!

It still feels like im stuck at 25- Its been hard ngl. Depression makes it hard to keep trying sometimes, but I just keep myself busy.

It was strange going through all the old posts- seeing things from old friends who kinda vanished from my life, old fandoms I used to care so much about. I could see every era of my life and it made me nostalgic as HELL.

I make fursuits full time now! I remember posting my first attempt here in 2017- somehow that escalated to full time self employment!

Its not exactly what I wanted as a career, but hey its close enough!

Art is still my passion though. For a long time it was really hard, my confidence in my work is still broken and im slowly picking up the pieces. Ive been drawing a lot of fanart thats doing well on twitter, but now that site is burning down so trying to get established elsewhere (fuck you, Elon. You’re putting my livelihood in danger because of your midlife crisis)

I would also like to use this blog as a place to kinda put my thoughts into the world maybe? I always felt so afraid to on twitter cause text limits and how public it felt. And I cant afford therapy sooooo-

I miss comics, I really do. I know a good chunk of this blog for a while was just shilling my comics. I still really want to finish Sea Children, at this point I think I need to in order to move on with my life. But I just dont have the time, and its hard to get in the mindset to put that amount of work into a project for the large possibility no one sees it, or that I might end up at square one of feeling like no one cares.

But! Im feeling better about my art, and want to start sharing it again. Gonna start slow, so If anyone cares, might be seeing that soon!

💖💖💖

#tay speaks

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chelleztjs18 · 1 year

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Hello you mrs. overpacker iced coffee drinker spicy eater sneezy lefty eyebag 😅

Good morning and hope you had a good nights rest. How are you today?

If you get the switch, then you can teach Emily to play video games with you. You guys can play Mario kart together hahaha then invite me to online play and we can compete 🤣

For Christmas dinner, I'm gonna make baked honey ham. Not sure on the sides yet, I'm debating on what to eat with the ham. Actually the dinner will be for the 24th, cause I decided to work on Christmas day.

You going to add "needs to like spicy food" as a deal breaker in a relationship? Hahaha just kidding. I guess I'm out of the race 😔

Dang she is going to be busy. Yeah hopefully she still has time to at least have fun and stuff. 2 jobs and school sounds difficult, to me at least.

Have you ever made a birthday wish and it came true?

‐CuriousGeorge

Hello hello corn-punn desert lover who's going to make me some tiramissu someday righty eyebag. lol

I didnt really have a long enough good sleep last night n woke up still with allergies n today my eyes are super itchy n my nose hurt. been sneezing too. i hate allergies.

i slept late last night because i decided to post pt. 3 of the monsters within at 1.30am lol. so i can focus on my chores today. I hope u like the pt. 3 and u r more than welcomed with any question u wanna ask me about it. :D

how r u? hows ur day so far n whats ur plan today?

haha that would be fun. i love mario kart. my favorie is crash bandicot game. i dont know if i ever ask u but whats ur favorite game?

What u doin now? I'm writing a bit pt 4 while watching the show Paranormal Caught On Camera lol

ooohh i love ham! if it's up to me, i want to have ham for christmas dinner but his brother wants traditional turkey dinner and his mom doesnt eat pork. so yeah, turkey for dinner i guess. :(

oh why did u pick to work on christmas? that sucks. I'm sorry! but i'll be still be here, n u can send me ask anytime.

I didnt say that cant eat spicy is the deal breaker though. :D

wanna know what's my deal breaker? if they chew loud and talk while they chew.. that gross me out so bad and drive me nuts. or when they use the utensils so loud. like, if you hear the knife n fork or spoon n fork make loud nice hitting each other or the plate, if that makes sense.

u can fart or burp in front of me, i can still tolerate n just give u a look. lol. but not if u chew so loud, big nope. hahaha. i once had a blind date, he was a handsome italian man, he even help me pull the chair for me to take a seat and or open the car door. but when we eat, he chews loud n talk while chewing. So no second date after that. :D

oh yeah, it will be busy for her. I just hope she wont get sick because she gets exhausted n i'm just here can only text her but cant take care of her, you know. :(

hmm i dont remember. i think i had my birthday wish came true a few time.. talking about wish comes true, i have been wishing and dreaming move to U.S and become citizen since i was in 4th grade. n my dream came true. :D

what bout u?

next question?

Cheerio! (not the cereal one)

#chellez answers #ask answered #anon answered #curious george anon

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