#hypergamous marriage

[vintagemadmoiselle]

Does anyone else find it alarming that everyone in Hollywood or people with a notable ounce of clout is getting divorced? Like at an alarming rate? I'm not usually one for conspiracy theories, but please entertain this with me:

I'm sure most of us are aware that there are higher ups in the industry that honestly control everything. They are the eyes and ears of the world. We can elude that its them triangle people. With that being said, there has been a rise in women, specifically black women who. have been raising the standards of their life, especially their dating life. Now I have seen this movement amongst other races of women, but as a black women, I'm looking at this specifically from our demographic and how our community is being affected by this.

More and more black women are rising up and raising their standards when it comes to dating, and for some odd reason we are getting a lot of push back, especially from our counterparts. We are basically in a gender war when it comes to dating. Now how does this relate to celebrities divorcing?

Well as consumers of media, it is very likely that we keep up with the drama of the world through blogs such as the shaderoom, Hollywood unlocked, onsite, etc, etc. I listed these specific blogs because they are more geared to the black community. Now if you follow or view these blogs then you have seen and/or even participated in the discourse in their comments, which are usually very toxic. With these divorces being posted and discussed about on these blogs of course people are going to put in their two cents. If the celebrities that are separating were well liked, there are always the comments of "love isn't real", "there's no point in getting married now", "I'll never get married" and all that other bs. This is because we as a society make the mistake of putting celebrities on a pedestal and trying to live vicariously through them.

That's at least what I have observed.

Now in the midst of all these divorces, Tyler Perry comes out and basically says since black women make more money then black men (which isn't true) we should allow them to just pay the light bill while we handle everything else. Basically, black women should settle for broke men (of our demographic).

So if you weren't following me, here's the order:

Black women start setting higher standards and wanting better for ourselves

All of a sudden every damn celebrity couple is getting divorced, and their drama is being placed in front of us by the media

Tyler Perry comes out and says black women should date broke (black) men

This can't be a coincidence, right?????

We naturally are more attracted to those of the same race as us and being that the black community seems to be in shambles when it comes to the dating market, its hard for me to believe that what is occurring in the media is all by coincidence. I honestly think black women is like a final boss because why is everybody and everything attacking us. Am I the only one who feels that way????

Ladies if marriage is something that you desire and require, don't let what's going on in the world scare/prevent you from acquiring that.

Sidenote: this is from a worldly perspective, for a more spiritual perspective I most definitely think there is some kind of spiritual warfare going on against marriages. If you're religious in any way please pray over your (and others) situations.

#high maintenance #soft black women #black girl luxury #soft life #black femininity #soft moodboard #growth #feminine energy #femininty #hypergamous #black women #marriage #celebrities #divorce #am i crazy #y'all see it too right ? #better #spiritual warfare

[teentoospoiled]

There’s a thin line between love and hate.

According to bodycam footage obtained by PLUNDER on YouTube, Kroy is seen informing police officers that Kim has gambled away their financial stability.

I would like to point out that financial hardships have brought many to end their own lives along with others, such as their wife and children. Watching Kroy lash out on the recent bodycam footage TMZ released is not only a reminder, but a red flag of a fatal reality.

They had their own reality show which paid them handsomely over the years. However, poor wealth management has led them to financial ruins today.

Kim’s gambling addiction has been documented on their show “Don’t Be Tardy,” and their lavish spending has been shown off on her social media platforms.

MARRIAGE IS A BUSINESS AGREEMENT

“Kim, these are joint marital assets!”

Kim has accused Kroy of selling her purses and other luxury belongings. Kroy has defended his actions stating he has sold or stashed “joint marital assets” to sell so he can pay off debts.

What are “Joint Marital Assets”?

JMA are items owned by both parties in the marriage due to the items being purchased during the duration of the marriage.

For example, if items are purchased from a joint bank account, it is considered a joint marital asset.

KROY HAS THE LEGAL RIGHT TO SELL THE HANDBAGS

WHY?

Because in the eyes of Georgia law, they are considered ONE. Therefore, Kroy has the authority to stash and sell items that are his.

Just like Kim has the legal authority to call a locksmith to break into a safe she suspects is holding her bags.

Love is useless without logistics

Financial literacy needs to be taught in schools, households and accessible television programs and social media apps. These two have 6 kids together who are now experiencing a major lifestyle shift, along with trauma

Two of the 6 children have had to call the police on their own parents.

TEEN SELF TIP: We all want the riches and luxury lifestyle, calling my hypergamy and spoiled girlies. Prepare for this desired lifestyle by learning how to save and multiply your money. Money from your job and your boo.

BuyMeACoffee, but I prefer wine ;)

#beneficiaryblr #confidence #high school #high school girl #high school tips #hypergamyblr #mental health #mental wellness #personal growth #self discipline #kim zolciak and kroy biermann ordered to pay nearly $230k to bank #Kim Zolciak #kroy biermann #dating #love #marriage #divorce #hypergamous #struggle love spotlight #struggle love #tts news

[depravedhousewife]

Married life moodboard

#my post #hypergamous dating #hypergamous #hypergamy #high maintenance #marriage #love #Hermes #birkin #ring #wedding

[csuitebitches]

What do you think about consumerism in relation to the "hypergamous" lifestyle?

Great question. I'm going to be honest with you. There’s no point in sharing my opinion, I’d rather share my observation.

there is this perception that you have to spend crazy $$, wear designer, go on expensive holidays, be a part of exclusive member-only clubs in order to bag a wealthy guy. The thinking is, “if I look the part, I will fit right in.”

let me break it to you. If you’re Asian, Middle Eastern - you come from a culture that basically defines marriage as something between two families and not individuals - you could live the above lifestyle, live way beyond your means but your chances of bagging a wealthy guy are low. If you do not have the family background or education level to support your lifestyle to be with a rich guy, it’s going to be very difficult, not impossible. You could bag someone who is upper middle class, but definitely not the 0.01%.

While it’s true that the rich do spend like crazy - you have to understand that (especially in Asians) the level of spending is completely different. They can book a first class emirates flight without caring about rates, they have access to concierge services, the circles are small but tight. It is extremely difficult to break into these if you don’t have the money or are extremely good friends with someone who is in this circle. To keep up with this circle is another financial headache.

The consumerism is crazy, it is high yes, but often it’s for things you might not expect. “Silent luxury”, investing in jewellery, properties, experiences, hobbies, drivers, PAs, 24/7 staff to take care of your home, having personal managers at the banks that have your accounts, seeing the top CEOs, politicians, actors etc as regular people - keeping up is not easy. Even if we look at normal stuff, like shopping for clothes - they’re able to blow this thousands of $ on a simple Hermes tea cup set, break it, and buy another one very nonchalantly. Not to mention the constant social gatherings, the clothes (god forbid you repeat), your life’s experiences etc etc. Women here don’t work to maintain their lifestyle, they work to enjoy what they are doing. Even if they stop working tomorrow, they will be financially taken care of by their families or husbands.

hypergamy here is completely different and obstructed. Let’s take my own example. I date boys that my family picks out for me - boys whose families own massive conglomerates, who are cultured and sophisticated, etc etc. I ended things with my last boyfriend because of multiple things, but what mattered most was that my father felt that he wouldn’t be able to provide for me the way I was used to all my life. (Even tho my ex came from a wealthy background too). At every social gathering that my parents organise or take me to, I’ve got my parents friends asking my parents if I’m single, if I’m interested in meetings their sons, etc etc. Dating and marrying hypergamously in Asian and Middle Eastern cultures is very much a family affair. There is a lot of talk that happens in these circles - who married who, whose kids are dating who, did you hear that A’s son fell in love with some middle class girl he met in college - not to your face, but behind your back.

What I’m trying to say is - you could look the part but still not bag the guy. You could dress nice, you could wear expensive perfume and make up but in the end, backgrounds are vetted extremely carefully. Especially in today’s day and age where looking the part has become easier than ever. So now when you tie this to consumerism, you can see why it can be difficult to keep up with this level of consumerism and spending. And even if you can - that may not guarantee anything. Unfortunately life isn’t like kdramas and some rich guy isn’t going to take pity on you and transform your life when he could just be with someone who has a similar upbringing which is more comfortable.

I’m not sure if I answered your question correctly, but I assumed that you were basically asking me if looking the part can get you any points in the hypergamy scene.

#q/a

[femmefatalevibe]

how do you reconcile being a feminist, single, and a high-value woman? maybe I'm misunderstanding the concept but I always thought HVW and hypergamy were all very centered on seeking a male partner.

Hi love! Great question. I think your curiosity offers a great opportunity to dive a bit more into my personal views and philosophy.

I believe that the goal of feminism is to protect all women and provide them legal protection, structural resources, and social power to live equitably in society. In my eyes, a high-value woman is one who is unapologetically self-respecting and sets her life up in a way to allows her to work towards goals that meet her needs in all areas of life.

Hypergamy, by its modern definition, is the idea that women "date up" to intertwine their sexual relationships with men to those who offer more or equally high social, financial, or sexual capital to them. The traditional idea of hypergamy was exclusively referred to as "marrying up" as marriage was the only way women could achieve most resources (like a bank account, credit card, housing, and certain medical care – it's so terrifying, honestly).

In the latter case, hypergamy is nearly synonymous with centralizing men. Before women gained certain freedoms (in the U.S. this was mostly in the 1960-70s), centralizing men was a survival mechanism, not a preference or act of self-imposed oppression.

I believe in the modern world where women can have their own bank accounts, careers, and access to birth control (the latter one is an anxiety-inducing topic at this point in time, ugh), women are given the choice to be hypergamous either while centralizing or decentralizing men.

I believe that you can uphold hypergamous standards in your dating life without centralizing men in your life. For me, personally, my relationship or dating status has no bearing on how happy or successful I am in my life. No man (or lack of one in my life) will ever determine my self-worth or reflect my progress in life. My metrics of fulfillment and accomplishment stem from thriving in my professional life, staying in good health, practicing consistently healthy habits (WFPB diet, regular exercise, mental health hygiene, sexual wellness, mindfulness, self-care, etc.), and maintaining nourishing friendships. Dating and my interactions with men (in non-platonic ways) are fun ways I enrich my life, so I believe this mentality embodies the modern – albeit hyper-progressive – definition of hypergamy. Remaining single allows me to enjoy all of the ways men can uplevel my life – socially, financially (to the degree some nighttime activities, such as dinners, drinks, car services, club fees, etc. are paid for – no sugaring activities or anything), and sexually without the aspects of dating men that would contradict my sense of self-respect or autonomy. I'm not personally designed to be a man's therapist or feel like I should have to include a man's needs in all of my life or day-to-day decisions because we're sexually involved with each other. I have a strict vetting process regarding who I will entertain in my dating/sexual life to ensure they're adding value to my life and there's mutual compatibility considering the type of arrangement we're both seeking.

Personally, I believe the only way to maintain equity in dating is to remain single, which allows me to meet all of my other standards in life. I will never sacrifice my life goals for a man, but I do not believe that means you have to approach dating or sexual relationships from a black-and-white perspective. However, if I'm going to date men (which can be a headache for certain), I believe they need to enrich my life in some way – whether that's interesting conversations, gaining business acumen, social relationships, fun sexual experiences, or just learning about different cultures/world perspectives.

From my observations, women who use hypergamy as an excuse to centralize their life or aspirations around a man are glamorizing regressive/oppressive ideologies (like submitting to a partner or relying on men financially) as a last attempt to uphold the patriarchy as women wake up to the fact that having to do all of society's emotional labor plus having to contort ourselves in a world designed for men, namely in our professional lives, is not the truest form of feminism out there (not to mention it's lack of intersectionality, but that's a whole other rant lol). I don't use the "hypergamy" tag on my posts anymore for this reason, though. I believe that many people are conflating the textbook concept of hypergamy with regressive political agendas, which I will never promote let alone subscribe to.

This is all just my take, so I hope it all makes sense and resonates with some members of this amazing community. Every woman should figure out what approaches to all of these matters would make her the most genuinely happy and fulfilled regardless of society's expectations or cultural norms.

Sending love xx

#femmefatalevibe #patriarchy #feminist #intersectional feminism #feminism #womens rights #high value woman #it girl #femme fatale #dark feminine energy #dark femininity #the feminine urge #dream girl #queen energy #female power #female excellence #self concept #life design #sex and relationships #interpersonal relationships #high value mindset #self improvement #glow up #girl advice #girl blogging #higher self #life path #life lessons

[philosophicalconservatism]

"The Alienation Of The Sexes: Feminism And The Manosphere."

The ideologies of both modern Feminism and of the so called “Manosphere” work to alienate the sexes from one another by entirely denigrating one sex in the eyes of the other. The first of these two ideologies (Feminism) operates by denying biology . The second ideology bases its entire doctrine on the idea of biological science, but grossly oversimplifies and mischaracterizes it in order to vilify the female sex. “We do not vilify women” its advocates will immediately respond. “Our propositions are not moral propositions they are merely descriptive. Women are not bad, they are simply what the evolutionary process has made them to be in order to maximize human survival and fitness.”

And what exactly has it made women according to the Manosphere? It has made them: self serving, superficial and incapable of feeling genuine love and sympathy for men. Women are “hypergamous” (which is a ubiquitous term in the Manosphere). They care only about exploiting the advantages of the highest status mate they can acquire for the benefit of themselves and their offspring. A man is simply a means to an end. The man on the other hand developed to have genuine affection for the woman because he was originally responsible for her provision and protection (just as she was responsible for the child’s, to whom she is singularity devoted).

Now things worked in a synergistic way for men and women as long as they were stabilized by traditional values and marriage, but now that both of these have been corrupted (and a court system which heavily favors women has been established) men and women are left with conflicting and competing individual interests. Men, according to this ideology, must now permanently discard of any genuine emotional investment in the opposite sex and pursue their own individual interests in the form of: money making, building social status, and pure sexual gratification. Interaction with the opposite sex consists of successfully gaming them in order to serve one's own interests (for both sexes).

Finally, everything that has been outlined above here about men actually concerns so called "Alpha males"; the small minority of men at the top of the social hierarchy that is allegedly pursued by most women. The majority of the male population is destined to languish in solitude and obscurity. This dark odd doctrine I have just described has become the counterpart to Feminism in the modern day. What happens to the nuclear family according to this perspective? Well, it is simply doomed; and society is most likely doomed along with it. All that remains for men at this point is the shallow pursuit of their own individual gratification while everything burns.

Manosphere ideology is nihilistic, while Feminist ideology is Utopian. Modern Feminism outright denies biology. Being born a male or a female means [essentially] nothing in particular. Everything is a social construct. And so if everything is socially constructed, it can be entirely reconstructed to conform to the whims of the ideologue. For example traditional masculinity (a compound of traits which is allegedly toxic by its very design) is a social construct to be dissected, exposed and dissolved. The Manosphere morally denigrates the female sex, but claims it is doing nothing more than describing a morally neutral biological reality. The Feminist (essentially) calls for the elimination of the male sex, but claims that she is merely targeting a malignant social construct.

Regardless of how such groups choose to frame and to justify their animus toward the opposite sex, it is what it is. And those of us who support the ideal of mutual love and understanding between the sexes must openly and decisively oppose these movements and groups.

#feminism #Manosphere

[audrinawf]

hypergamy is not natural and just cause you married someone from a rich family doesn’t mean you even understand hypergamy you found someone by luck you said so yourself so why would you even teach girls about it when you’re not hypergamoys?

Im sorry I totally missed where I claimed to be a hypergamy guru?????? like I’ve made 3 posts on hypergamy fkn chill.

And also I’m south asian, my whole lineage has been practicing hypergamy for 5736623 years. every single woman related to me is married to a PROVIDER, high earner or not and has not had to work unless they wanted to. my latest post was a call out to the idiot who kept going on about dating and hypergamy being some sort of mystical art form? as if us south Asians, east asians and Arab girlies haven’t practiced hypergamy for centuries like bye. Us brown girls are raised in this culture and it’s not magic or witchcraft it’s basic standard to marry a man that PROVIDES it’s not about marrying a multi millionaire it’s just about marrying a man that was raised right and knows his duty. do I care if people want to marry rich or not? I don’t. My dad has never been filthy rich but he’s busted his ass to make sure my mom never has to work REGARDLESS cause that’s what he was raised to do. Does that mean that I’m a hypergamy guru??? no I never claimed to be like pls don’t follow me unless it’s for manifestation and law of assumption cause that’s the only content I care about!

And also me marrying someone that’s generous is just a result of my upbringing, do I have to keep saying it? it’s not luck and it’s not deliberate witch craft either. It’s a natural consequence of how I was raised.

I’m just tired of people who do not come from these cultures that are familiar with hypergamy to trash it. hypergamy is not the same as red pill. like I get it some of y’all don’t have parents that were married and that’s alright y’all don’t understand marriage or hypergamy but why speak on it then if you’ve not witnessed it first hand? And if you are you are so determined not to be hypergamous then don’t? think about why it makes some of y’all so mad to see women finally marry and secure a good future for themselves and their future children?

I’m convinced there’s some undertone of racism or at least lack of cultural awareness to it. like we have this thing that has worked for centuries all across multiple cultures that are predominantly brown and seeing people who do not come from those cultures diss it makes me angry. especially since I want all of my friends who are not from these hypergamy cultures to learn about hypergamy and marry provider men like I want that for you guys!!!!

#hypergamy #glow up #femininity #manifestation #self care #girly blog #soft life #traditional wife #housewife #stay at home wife

[brownsugar-dreams]

Greetings! I highly appreciate your blog. I'm a 23 year old black woman who is a pre-med student. I am interested in dating for marriage and want to date (and eventually marry) hypergamously. I figured I should look for a spouse in medical school. I want to ask if you have any advice for a young woman in my position? How can I expand my network for future mates if the ones at my future school don't cut it? Thank you for all you do!!

Great ask! I actually just recorded an episode about hypergamous relationships in med school inspired by this ask. I met a practicing Pediatrician who told me she practices hypergamy. She met her now husband when she was a broke med school student. He paid off her school loans prior to even marrying her. Her advice to me was to NOT date classmates because they are in the same financial position (debt) as we are. Even after leaving med school, the shortest residency program is 3 years. By then the debt has piled up for the both of you. Here’s the summary:

During your M1 year, date date date! Get on the dating apps, get outside and freestyle, just don’t get with a classmate.

Have fun with dating. Don’t get attached to one man in the beginning. The point of dating is to see who you click with best and who satisfies your needs. You know whatever standards you have set for yourself. Avoid wasting time with those who don’t measure up

Put the idea that marriage is the goal in the back of your head. Keep it in mind so you can date with purpose, but don’t obsess over it. Always remember you are highly desired by men so take your time.

Great places to meet wealthy men while in school: charity galas, networking events, hotel lounges (take your laptop, grab some coffee and study in the lobby. It works so well), festivals, restaurants near festivals/sports games/conferences the day of the event, live music venues, farmers market, department stores, airport lounges

I started the private podcast for sugar/dating stuff because of med school but I’ll still record episodes on the regular one from time to time. Thanks for the support 🥰 Take a listen if you can:

#sugar bowl #podcast #sugar lifestyle #hypergamy #sugar baby tips #heaux tips #brown sugar baby #sugar dating #spoiled heaux #heauxlife #daily motivation #hypergamous

[daphnedauphinoise]

Hi Daphne, I hope you're having a warm and sunny July! Thank you for sharing the Vogue video of the couple, it was so special and I hope everyone finds someone like that and has a happy, fulfilling, lifelong relationship <3 Do you often see south asian women marry up/hypergamously? When they do, do you find it's more often within their own ethnic community or are mixed marriages happening in our generation more often and easily? (Of course this is accounting for both people focusing on pursuing good educations and thriving, healthy lives in general). I noticed that many times the hypergamous marriages are within ethnic cultures in Canada/US but noticed a much more culturally accepted trend- almost normalcy- towards mixed relationships in the UK/Europe? I don't know if those relationships turn into marriage though, or if mixing is less common among upper classes. Just wondered your thoughts/observations, but please feel to hit pass on this too no stress. Thanks for reading~

Yes and yes.

Hypergamy is arranged marriage for us. If you know how they work then you know the entire premise of it is marrying up.

South Asian marrying other high up South Asians and South Asians marrying high up White people, both are common. It is normal. Class works different here in the UK and I will be here all day explaining it but in a condensed version higher class liking being within their class. South Asians in the UK are very accomplished and there are many South Asian holding top CEO positions to high government positions to be innovators to creatives. Ofc this isnt everyone but having a South Asian in a high up position is nothing new here. Seeing wealthy South Asians is nothing new.

So many of my girlfriends who are desi have their 'old money' bfs or other wealthy white boys and everyone is fine. Another lot are with their wealthy Asian bfs, they are fine. Again like attracts like.

Sorry if this didn't quite explain it. I just woke up from a nap. Feel free to ask more xx

[papirouge]

It’s sad for me to say that I had to literally block the keywords trad fem and femininity from the sites I go on because the communities hardly attract quality people/happy people who like their lives. Literally the opposite

It’s now all about bullying every woman who doesn’t fit in with their standards. I’ve seen really gross and hateful things said about fat women, women who aren’t white, women who are choosing to be single, who don’t want kids, who can’t have kids, who are hypergamous, who listen to fds rules for dating, women who are feminist

It’s like the rules for this just mean that to be apart of this subculture you must be thin, white, wear dresses and heels all the time and that’s apparently what femininity is

What is this whole purpose? If you rudely bash and disregard people who you don’t instantly agree with you then who do you plan to recruit? Is the plan to just attract misogynistic incels and deeply insecure women who project all their insecurities onto others? now there’s infighting with PearlyThings who came in to trash the whole idea of marriage and now there’s drama among them.

Anon, just stop trying to fit into a box, an aesthetic or a community.

The trad community seems to be filled with 99% of degenerates so you might as well enjoy this stuff away from the internet. Actually there's nothing more authentically trad than shut down your smartphone and simply enjoying life in your own terms 🤍🩷🩵

#answered

[pissmoon]

Stop girlbossifying hypergamous marriage 2023 its more likely rich men will use you than it is that you will 'use' them you have no idea how terribly rich men can treat their wives

[sphines]

FOMO and hypergamy

Sexual (and financial) hypergamy for women has a significant psychological consequence in addition to anxiety: Fear Of Missing Out.

Every hypergamous woman who pursues a man out of her league as her instincts demand is constantly wrapped by the fear that her current target(s) is not the most sexually (or financially) attractive man whom she has a chance with. What if a better man turned up shortly? This was one of the reason why many women would not engage in promiscuity when young and were virgins on marriage: being already pregnant with a less attractive man would prevent them from becoming pregnant with a more attractive man, so it was a difficult step to take.

Note: The other reason why most women were virgins on marriages was that the mothers of the grooms insisted on it, to ensure that their investment in bearing and raising their sons would not be voided by the bride being already pregnant with the child of another woman's son.

The Fear Of Missing Out was particularly strong before anti-conceptionals: getting pregnant with a man out of her league meant being unable to get pragnant with a man even more out of her league, for at least the duration of the pregnancy. Thus the high demand for abortions in the past, and also in the present.

Note: in some (mammalian too) specieses females kill their cubs if their main male mate dies, in order to better attract a new male mate.

The anti-conceptional pill changed a bit that situation: it simulates pregnancy to prevent conception, but a pregnancy that does not last 40 weeks, and stopping taking the pill simulates ending the pregnancy, rather quickly. This has enabled many women with a weaker instinct for reproduction to sample many men, even those slightly less attractive than their ideal of a father for their sons, knowing that there was no risk that these than ideal fathers would not make them pregnant. However old instincts persist and for many women FOMO is still a powerful force leading them to procrastinate pregnancy.

There is however another side to FOMO: that the more they wait, the more hypergamous women age, and therefore their league falls, and so also the attractiveness of the men most of their league they can target.

So many women are caught between both sides of FOMO: wait too little, and they may have to give up on getting the man most of their league they can realistically get, and wait too much and their league decays to the same effect.

#hypergamy #fear of missing out #FOMO #anticonceptional