#hyperexcitability

[bathask]

感覚過敏な感覚処理感受性か曇りの日は繊細微妙な明るさ加減で過興奮性な覚醒度上昇。擬態化マスキング過緊張高不安な自閉症スペクトラム障害こだわり光るもの魅了DSM-5診断基準で影と光加減見つめると懐かし様な安心感。大人の発達障害アスペルガー/自閉スペクトラム症ASDの障害福祉A型事業所で仕事中

#snapseed #autism spectrum disorder #high functioning autism #こだわり #restricted repetitive behaviors #obsessed with lights #fascination with lights #high anxiety #very nervous #awakening #hyperexcitability

[helenwhiteart-blog]

Synesthesia and sensory meltdown: is there a link?

This post really deserves to be an add-on to my last one on the topic of synesthesia, migraine and environmental sensitivities; I clearly have a lot more to say on the topic, which has been a preoccupation all week. This time, I was inspired by am Instagram post I happened to see on the morning I first began writing this on the account called @theautisticlife, which listed the differences between…

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#ADHD #anomalous experiences #articles #autism #dopamine #environmental sensitivity #Highly Sensitive Person #hyperexcitability #meltdown and shutdown #mirror touch synesthesia #mitempfindungen #neurodiversity #serotonin #stimming #synesthesia

[ylhbyfhcv8c]

Gay big ass pounding Deviant Hardcore - Hot Chicks Yasmine de Leon & Brandy Aniston Loves Getting Rough With Each Other Hot old and young action with hot teen twat finger fucked Lisa fucking Fischl with a strapon in the library - Genshin Impact Hentai. Veronica Rodriguez oils her fine ass up before MASTURBATION and ANAL PLAY Marathi घरी कोण नसल्यावर मी माझ्या सासूचे बॉल दाबताना Naked nude nudist gay sex male Mark is such a handsome young man, Latina Amatuer Big Ass Fucked Doggystyle Talented asian bimbo pleasures her stud with an oral job job Happy gal with hot tits gets fondled and nailed hard

#pornocracy #ohm #broly #suf #plainclothesmen #radicular #Kurdish #merchandises #threne #phosphatized #thermospheres #thankfullest #hyperexcitability #self-induction #coae- #urinoscopies #fraudlessly #real-hearted #dumbledore #reinvolvement

[catboybiologist]

So yeah on the one hand I love the changes that are happening to my body and I'm excited to socially transition within the next six months or so, but at the same time you have to admit there's a certain appeal to being the plucky little tall rambly hyperexcitable effeminate twink that makes straight men question their sexuality and straight women dream about torturing in a little glass vial

[pistatsia]

Shidou Ryusei: as free as a bird

Shidou is uncomfortable, imperfect. He's vulgar, he's gross, he's blatantly cruel, and he's incapable of compromise. He's hyper-excitable, constantly ready to fight and even looking forward to that brawl. He switches between moods like a kaleidoscope, and what falls out in that kaleidoscope is unpredictable.

Shidou has absolutely no understanding of morality.

This is especially evident in his encounter with Kunigami.

He has absolutely no understanding of the concept of protecting someone simply for no gain. Trying to protect someone heroically, purely because of an understanding that it's wrong, is ridiculous to Shidou. Shidou has only "his" and "others", and that "his" so far includes only Sae, as shown in the episode where he tries to turn Sendou's face into mush.

Nor does he understand the moralization that it is wrong to hit people. He just doesn't get it, and it's probably ridiculous for him to even think about it, because at the deepest level he has an attitude to respond to any hint of a threat with a fight.

Most likely Shidou grew up in an environment where brute force decided everything. That's why he's so hyperexcitable.

Shidou is in a constant state of tension, waiting for even the slightest hint of a threat, which he is happy to crush immediately. He's constantly ready to strike because he's used to constantly feeling a threat - one that he had to respond to with violence because he wouldn't have survived otherwise. His "fight" response, out of a combination of ancient instincts called "fight-flight-freeze," is always switched to the max.

We all know that the attack is the best form of defense, and Shidou follows this motto with his entire being. "Beat your own so that others will fear you" is about him.

Shidou doesn't mention his family at all in his Blue Lock profile like other players do. Remember how he talks about Santa in the same form - "I can buy something on my own" sounds very childish and unhappy. When you're trying to prove to yourself that you don't need it at all - because if you need it, you won't get it anyway.

Beyond that, even leaving aside his family and theoretical home environment, we know for a fact that Shidou didn't play for any football team before Blue Lock.

He was a loner, and therefore the only space where he could practice was the street.

And street football is insanely, inhumanly violent.

And it makes sense that this similar environment, both at home and in the game, formed the core of Shidou's personality that we see in the manga. The core of personality, which is based on the desire to survive, and not just survive, but to show everyone around him that despite everything he has gnawed out a life for himself with his teeth. A life in which cruelty is the law.

A life where he exists.

Shidou is probably one of the most evident Blue Lock players, for whom football is not only inextricably linked to life - it is life. And Shidou is absolutely explicit about this both in the interview and in the manga.

For Shidou, football and life are one and the same.

The same thing that Aiku says: Shidou is incapable of separating the field and life. They're inseparable in his world in general; they're one and the same.

It is only logical that Shidou transfers the laws of his life to football as well; and ends up playing football the same way he plays life - a football of the "survival" kind. Where it is his biological need (I'm sorry), his only aspiration, the violence that breaks everything in its path. Where the way to "survive the game", just as in life, is to leave your mark, to somehow prove your existence in people's lives, to be remembered by them and imprinted in their memories.

And pay attention to the way Shidou lives: not according to the rules, uncomfortable and bright, believing that it is better to burn to the death than to lie in a corner as a gray shadow, but alive.

There are no rules in Shidou's football; therefore, there are no rules in Shidou's life.

And that's why Shidou despises heroes and "good guys"; because only naive idiots who don't understand real life, the one where your survival is all that matters. That's why he mocks Kunigami's principles so much: because to him, a child for whom his whole life has been one big attempt to gnaw his teeth out to survive, such principles are irrelevant.

Because there are no heroes in Shidou's world, and even if there were, they've long since broken.

And there are no restrictions in Shidou's life either. He lives a violent life, and it makes sense that he lives by the same principles in Blue Lock, not hesitating to threaten Rin with the end of his career or Igaguri with murder.

He's not violent because he takes some special pleasure in bullying Igaguri: he's violent because that's just who he is. He doesn't have a "harming others is not okay" attitude. It's instinct - as seen especially in his episodes of fighting with Rin. He doesn't care at all about causing him long-term harm or ruining his career - on the contrary, he enjoys it in the moment.

And this is especially evident in his relationship with Isagi; while Shidou had nearly smashed his head in the day before, on the field he already openly admires him and is quite friendly. Shidou doesn't give violence any particular importance - you don't give any importance to brushing your teeth or throwing out the rubbish in the morning, do you?

For Shidou, it's just insignificant, because violence is the organic basis of his life, its law and right.

Today he's trying to kill Isagi, and tomorrow it's Isagi-chan.

Because Shidou has no social competence - he had no parents to bring him into society and set some morals.

And his desires are pretty simple and even primitive. When he learns of his potential salary, his first thought is how much he can eat on it. All he basically wants, almost to the point of obsession, is to induce vivid emotions, explosion, adrenaline - something Shidou is addicted to, living in constant danger and something that allows him to feel alive and existent.

You know who that sounds like? Denji. A main character from Shidou's most favourite manga.

They both had no guides to society. They're both unfortunate kids who were deprived of absolutely everything when they were young. Who are so vulgar and repulsive not because there's anything wrong with them and they act so deliberately and meanly - but because they just don't know any other life. They just don't understand what it's like to live differently. They both live on base instincts.

And they both try to greedily claim as much as they can from the life around them - the food, the people, the sensations.

Because they had nothing before.

Back to Shidou and his football.

The most amazing thing about Shidou is the way he treats his opponents (omitting attempts to injure them). Shidou, even when losing, finds time to admire them - to admire those who took the ball away from him or stole a goal. He's really just having a good time - while for Rin, football is something to be taken completely seriously, for Karasu it's a need to pre-analyse opponents, and for Snuffy it's work, Shidou is just having fun.

And at the same time, what, along with "watch as world reaches its end" and "at the end of the day, when I became nothing, tears came out" demonstrates the duality of his nature is his attitude to losing.

He and Kaiser actually have too many parallels, but this is one of the most obvious - even though they treat the issue differently, they act in the same way.

They're both prepared to admit when they're losing - and they're both willing to break themselves for the sake of the goal. They both know how and when to tame jealousy and the losing parts of their being.

Because they don't believe in winning (explosion) any other way.

Shidou knows when to back down. Because he learnt this too from his childhood - that if the opponent is stronger than you and you keep carelessly breaking forward, sooner or later it will destroy you. The only way to win is to recognise his superiority and fracture yourself, forming a new self - one that can defeat him (as seen in Shidou's willingness to stop fighting so that Ego would let him out, and Kaiser's with his story with Noa).

The ability to appreciate and recognise the strength of your opponent is a basic principle of survival.

But at the same time (just like Kaiser), Shidou doesn't believe that there are invincible opponents. You just have to know the way to break them.

Or rather, not know: feel. Which is what happens at the U-20 game when Shidou enters the flow.

Logically, with all of the above, Shidou is a complete individualist, and is unable to comply with Rin even for the sake of a goal - because Shidou knows he can beat him. The point at which his PXG game has evolved - with two formations, one centered on Shidou and the other on Rin - is the clearest evidence of this.

Shidou knows when to back off - but Shidou isn't going to back off until circumstances force him to.

And in the end, this approach of Shidou ended up being too egoistic for Blue Lock, which is insanely ironic. What's also funny is that along with it, it's his attitude towards football that epitomises Ego's ideal - a player who puts everything he has into it because it's his way of surviving.

And so we come to that one scene of punishment. And it's this, along with Shidou's monologue from the U-20 game, that reveals him the most.

Because in the first few frames Shidou looks frankly miserable. Of course, anyone would look that way in his position. But suddenly Shidou starts talking calmly, offering a compromise - and then in the same second he snaps.

He explodes, cursing Ego - though as his words show he understands the reason for the punishment - he's even willing to compromise. It's illogical to curse the one on whom his salvation depends, isn't it?

Shidou acts this way because he's afraid.

Because in this moment - bound, locked up, and alone - he is defenseless.

He's like a caged animal that can't think logically - he's terrified, he's scared, he can only throw himself helplessly around the cage, grinning his teeth wantonly. This is the first time we see him so seriously angry (he still did get some fun, adrenaline rush during the fight with Rin).

The worst thing for Shidou, free as a bird or a tiger and most of all wanting that very freedom (more about that later) is vulnerability and limitation. Powerlessness. For the sake of overcoming this, he is ready to give up violence and his principles of life, as long as he is released and pulled out of this hell of helplessness.

And this fear is actually incredibly characteristic of his personality too.

But in order to understand why, of all the possible punishments of the world, it is the restriction that drives him to panic, let's remember what football means to him and his style of play in it.

Shidou has sharp and monstrous, even beastly reflexes and instincts. They are honed to the max. He is very strong physically, fast, agile, flexible, perfectly sensing the space around him. Optimal in his movements. Unpredictable. His illogical patterns are impossible to read.

Shidou is all of one naked reflex and instinct, free in his absolute savagery. He is a completely separate character outside of the Ego's system. He literally speaks a different language.

And Sae happens to be the only one who understands that language.

And up until their moments together, this is most vividly shown when Sae stops Shidou from beating up another player - and not just stops him, but understands what needs to be said.

Which again proves that in the violent chaos of Shidou's life he does have a certain logic. A constantly shifting, flexible one, but one...

Which, again, Sae alone understands.

And it is through playing with Sae that the whole point of why football is so important to Shidou is revealed. Why he plays it so instinctively, despising the rule, the tactics, and his teammates. Why is he suddenly willing to "break himself" for Sae, adjusting his rules of life to fit him, yesterday's stranger - because Sae accepts both him and his football, and doesn't try to limit or remake him. And that's exactly why Shidou is willing to be changed to match him.

Because Shidou's football, the life he wants to achieve, is all about freedom.

And that's not enough for him. It's not enough for Shidou just to play, just to live. It can't be enough for a man who is used to living on adrenaline and fighting for his existence every day.

Life for Shidou is about freedom, just as football is his escape and a place where he can exist.

Shidou stands out, doesn't follow the rules, exists so vividly and with every action clearly and distinctly proving his presence...

To live.

Both football and Shidou's life are about escaping, about breaking out of his limits. To see the world as himself - free and alive.

Football makes Shidou feel whole, feel alive. Football is what glues him together. It's the only way he can prove what he is - by achieving something. By making himself colorful, visible, uncomfortable - in a way that he can't be turned away from.

One that will allow him to leave a trace of his existence in the world. One that will prove to him that he is.

For Shidou, all these metaphorical (or not) explosions are actually a way of proving that he exists.

Even his fights and quarrels actually serve his purpose - and Shidou himself confirms this in his monologue. All of this is to be vivid, to imprint, to exist.

To be someone who cannot be forgotten or turned away from.

Who cannot be overlooked.

Who exists as obviously as he can.

Even his favorite subjects at school - Art and Physical Education (the latter obviously about football) - are related. Because it's possible to leave your mark on the world with art, too - and it makes sense that Shidou admires it so much. Because art is, after all, the most colorful thing a living person can leave behind.

And for Shidou, art is football.

For him, to exist is to be free. And to burn so brightly that it blinds his own eyes - otherwise both life and football become bland, boring and insignificant to him. Just like his evenings - remember "When is the last time you cried?" from The Egoist Bible? And remember Shidou's response?

"At the end of the day, when I became nothing, tears came out."

Because in the evening, emotions and people disappear and you're left to yourself. Empty, aimless and in a way pathetic - because you're no longer on fire. Because you lose all the things that made you feel during the day.

Shidou depends on vivid emotions - because, due to his difficult youth, they are the only things that allow him to feel that he is alive.

That he's free.

Shidou's favorite song is also about freedom and trying to break free from the constraints of his life.

There is nothing in the world Shidou longs for more than freedom.

And the spider in Shidou's favorite song is limited and weak.

A spider without wings is incapable of flying. The spider without wings is trapped in unfreedom, looking at the blue and vast sky above his head every day - one that he cannot reach.

A spider without wings is incapable of flying - and those wings Shidou himself, like the spider in the song, could not get, no matter how hard he tried.

But Sae gave Shidou those wings. Sae gave Shidou the ability to play to his full potential, the way he craved with his entire being. Sae took him out from Blue Lock. Sae acknowledged him. Sae gave him a chance to make his mark on the world and gave him purpose, he showed him that there was someone who understood him and his aspirations on this base, animal level.

Sae gave Shidou freedom.

And Shidou learnt to fly.

#shidou ryusei #itoshi sae #ryusae #ryusae are only implied so you can think of them as platonic but Kaneshiro'd be disappointed with you #bllk analysis #blue lock #bllk #character examination #blue lock analysis

[gasolinerainbowpuddles]

𝑭𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑳 𝑾𝑶𝑴𝑨𝑵 ║ Chapter 4 - I'm Standing on the Ashes of Who I Used To Be

| FERAL WOMAN | series masterlist | main masterlist | | PAIRING(s): Joel Miller x fem!OC/reader | RATING: explicit material | 18+ | WORD COUNT: 5.3k | CHAPTER WARNINGS: none | CHAPTER SUMMARY: With your solo trip to the market taking a jarring deviation from what you’d planned, you find yourself alone with Joel in his house for a moment of reprieve. The one-on-one setting grants you the opportunity to get more insight into the man who is quickly becoming something of a fascinating and commanding companion.

║ＰＲＥＶＩＯＵＳ ║⋄── •✧• ──⋄║ ＮＥＸＴ ║

Please read with caution if you have difficulties with works concerning: SA, physical violence, torture, captivity, trauma, and similar topics as they are discussed throughout the series. All highly sensitive portions WILL BE MARKED with my sensitive material banner if you wish to skip the more challenging portions. The sensitive material banner looks like this:

Joel and Ellie’s house was much different from Susan’s. The usual tidy and bright space she kept was a far cry from the laid back atmosphere of the one you currently found yourself in. Jackets were draped on the stair banister. Boots were jumbled along the hallway baseboard. Comic books were strewn about the floor of the living room in your periphery. An empty glass sat dangerously close to the edge of the console table next to you. Susan’s mantra “a place for everything, and everything in its place” would be more of a “this is our place, so everything’s all over the place” here. It wasn’t dirty or cluttered. Just, very lived in. While it was obvious there wasn’t a lot of coming and going from Susan’s - yours and Susan’s, you mentally amended - Joel and Ellie’s home reflected the flurry of constant movement of its inhabitants.

“You can hang Tommy’s jacket on that hook over there or jus’ keep it on, whatever’s your preference. Same for boots. Kick ‘em off somewhere to your left if you want,” he signaled as he began shucking his jacket from his shoulders and hanging it on a hook.

“I didn’t take it,” you declare abruptly.

“Take it? Huh? Take what?” Joel looked up from shoving off his boots. His furrowed brow and downturned mouth signaled pure confusion at the sharp left in the conversation.

“Tommy, he gave me this. This jacket. And I can, well. As long as, until Maria can bring me- get me a new one. But I didn’t s-steal it,” you stressed.

“Yeah, I wasn’t really thinkin’ you managed to nick his favorite jacket from him,” Joel quipped with a snort. 

“Favorite?” you mumble.

You frowned and looked down to the jacket you had been wearing almost constantly since it had been lent to you. Your face twisted in displeasure at the stain along the buttons where you had spilled your drink  a few days ago. A dark tea Susan had urged you to drink. 

You weren’t usually in a situation where you had to worry about food or drink being too hot - or even warmed, for that matter - so you weren’t thinking when you raised the cup to your lips and burnt your tongue almost immediately. The tea had dribbled out from your mouth, followed by more drops sloshing from the mug. It all joined in a splotch of brown that had already ruined Tommy’s jacket. His favorite jacket.

“He’ll recover,” Joel ragged. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.”

You brush aside the fledgling awareness that your hyperexcitability today was a showcase of your absolute lack of sensibility. Forming your own movements and thoughts felt unbearable, so you mimicked Joel’s actions and removed your jacket and boots. Joel stood with his hands firmly on his hips. The corner of his bottom lip was neatly tucked under his incisors as if in thought. Noticing you had made yourself comfortable, he cleared his throat and shifted his weight.

“I can, uh … Do you want me to sit outside? I don’t mind,” he offered.

“No. S’your house.” 

Him offering to sit outside in the cold sank into your mind like a fallen tree into a torrential river. A hard stop in your internal turmoil, shifting your refractory thoughts yet again. Although it was a considerate gesture, it only underlined the extensive accommodations you required to just fucking exist. 

You weren’t going to force him to sit outside in the cold. Not after all he had done for you today. 

“Alright. Just tryna gauge the situation. Want you to feel comfortable,” he admitted. “Know you’ve had a mornin’.”

“I’m fine,” you lie.

“Couch.” You motion vaguely to the living room where you could see the open seating. A shrug of your shoulders was intended to offset the rude demand and distort it as more of a question, but Joel didn’t seem to mind your choppy communication.

He nodded and planted himself comfortably onto the far left side of the couch. He turned his head to look over his shoulder at you when you hadn’t moved. Before you could entertain your hesitations too long, you hurled your leg out to set yourself in motion towards the couch. When you rounded the right side, you were presented with yet another dilemma: where to sit. 

If you sat all the way to the right, Joel might feel offended that you wanted so much space between you. If you sat in the middle, you’d be uncomfortable. And maybe he would be, too? As usual, you were left without an obvious place where you belonged.

“Just take the other end, darlin’,” Joel drawled. 

Your eyes snapped to him. You tried to identify any impression of offense that you clearly didn’t want to sit too close to him, but there was nothing to discover except his unfazed, neutral disposition.

You turned and plopped down into the opposite corner of the couch from Joel. You tugged the lifted edges of your sleeves down in an attempt to cover your wrists. It seemed pointless to do so when your fully visible face and neck had plenty enough evidence of imparted violence, but you couldn’t eschew the way it made you feel exposed. You wanted to hide away as many parts of yourself that you could.

Joel pivoted to face you more directly, clasping his hands together loosely between his knees as he rested his elbows on his thighs and leaned forward. “You’n Susan gettin’ on alright?”

It was an innocent enough question. Probably just an attempt to make small talk while the two of you waited for Ellie to return. But none of that stopped the onslaught of reminders about everyone’s opinions about you. Your supposed splintery, temperamental nature. Your delicate balance between calm and chaos.

A flush of irritation swept across your cheeks. You played back Tommy and Maria’s conversation from earlier today in your mind. The heat spread to your chest, mingling with your thundering heartbeat, when you remembered how Ellie had shown up at the door to speak with Susan after the unorthodox introduction you’d had with her and Joel.

“Did you send Ellie to the house the other day?” you challenge.

Joel didn’t answer right away and instead paused to absorb your brusque charge. It was all you needed to confirm he had indeed enlisted Ellie’s surveillance of you.

“I did,” he admitted.

“I’m not going to hurt Susan,” you snip. 

A constricting sensation wrapped your lungs. Everyone assumed you were ready at a moment’s notice to harm other people. A primal defense. A ticking time bomb. You weren’t that person. 

Why did everyone think you were that kind of person?

“Huh? Hurt Susan?” Joel parotted, a perplexed inflection in his voice.

“You sent Ellie. That’s why you had her, told her– That’s why you sent Ellie. Isn’t it? Because you–you think after the other day, in the snow, that I’m– Because I’m not in my right mind, and I will hurt Susan?” you protest.

You words came out a jumbled mess, but you didn’t care. You were sticking up for yourself. Or something like that. Tommy and Maria freely discussing how much of a catastrophe you were only instigated round after round of residual anger. Each recounting amassing with the others, snowballing into a pit of fury in your gut.

“WELL?” you demand.

You ignored the bile licking at your throat as you recklessly addressed Joel, a man who could slam your head in one swift strike against the stone fireplace a few feet away and kill you instantly, if he wanted to.

 “I sent Ellie, yeah, but it wasn’t Susan I was thinkin’ we needed to check up on,” he snorted in disbelief. He glanced at your hands folded in your lap and back up to you with a frown. “You’re shaking.”

“No I’m not,” you argue immediately. The tremor in your voice was clear even to your own ears.

“Alright,” he drew the word out in a mumble, not paying any mind to your awful lying.

When he stood up without warning, you flinched with such a frenetic motion that you knocked one of the back cushions out of place and over top your legs.

“Whoa, whoa now. Hold on,” Joel implored. He took a large step away from the couch and raised his palms out and up to his shoulders. You wanted to sink into a hole in the floor. He was interacting with you like he was trying to pacify a startled animal.

“Wasn’t thinkin’. Sorry ‘bout that,” he apologized earnestly. “I was gonna get you some water. You keep lickin’ and bitin’ at your lips. Gonna bleed if you keep it up.”

Trembles wracked your entire frame as you willed yourself to sit upright and return the cushion to its rightful place along the back of the couch. “S’f-fine.”

“Do I, I mean, should I announce myself? Coming back in?” he suggested.

You shrugged and cast your eyes to the ground. Apparently you were never short on finding new ways to make yourself appear more demented and disturbed.

Heavy footsteps sounded down and back up the hallway, followed by Joel’s clear call that he was behind you and coming up on your right side. As promised, he appeared on your right-hand side and passed a full glass of water to you. You whispered a thanks and emptied its entire contents in a few, rapid gulps. Joel repeated his trip to the kitchen and his words of notice as he brought you another glass of water, which you downed a touch less voraciously this time.

You finished the last sip and turned the glass in your hands. Your stomach gurgled at the rapid ingestion of liquid with no solids present to settle it.

“Hungry?” he prodded. 

You dipped your head “yes” even though it hadn’t been that long since you ate breakfast. Usually your appetite wouldn’t build so quickly, but it was yet another thing you were coming to accept as your new normal.

“C’mon,” he instructed, turning and walking back into the kitchen. You followed with slow, gradual steps. Your nerves were still on fire from all the events of the day, and Joel’s surprise departure from the couch had set ablaze an entirely new fit of anxiety.

“Dunno what you like,” he said from behind the fridge door. He straightened and sighed, seeming dissatisfied with the offerings. He closed the fridge and opened a few cabinets. He pulled down a container that had a variety of bagged nuts and some jerky.

A little noise escaped you when you saw the jerky, and you cringed when Joel noticed. 

“Somethin’ you see? Can have whatever you want.”

“I - I would – if it would be – some, some of the jerky,” you whisper, pointing feebly to the container.

Joel didn’t hesitate to grab the packet and hand it to you. Your eyes widened as you extended your arm and carefully extracted it from his grasp. Joel sent an amused smile your way, and the thin line of your mouth twitched up at the corners in response. You opened the packet and looked back up at Joel for permission. 

“Go on,” he insisted. “Knock yourself out.” Your smile fell flat at his harmless idiom.

“Oh. Somethin’ I said?” He frowned in consideration at your shift in mood.

“It’s .. not you. It’s me. It’s my problem, I mean. You didn’t. You didn’t do anything.” You worried your bottom lip between your teeth and stared at the jerky. It was ridiculous how nervous you felt to just reach out and take a piece.

You couldn’t shake the memory of the night at the cabin. The dirty, forgotten piece of jerky on the floor underneath the cabinets. Getting caught by Sam’s men. How you didn’t get the jerky or anything else to eat, but instead you just ended up–

“I appreciate you wantin’ to spare my feelings and all, but it clearly was somethin’ I did,” he contested. “If I knew what it was, I could avoid doin’ it again.”

Your eyes met his searching gaze. Your heart jumped into your throat when you saw the sincerity he held for you. Maybe he deserved to know. He had done more than enough for you today.

If telling him the truth was all you had to do, maybe you should just do that. Return the kindness. Like you were trying to do with Susan. Give something to these people showing you kindness and help. Offering way less in return for all they were doing for you. It wasn’t like he didn’t have a rough idea of your previous living situation. Your roughed up appearance and skittish demeanor did very little to obscure the extent of the challenges you’d faced.

“Well. I-I don’t know how to. How to say it, exactly,” you confess.

And you didn’t. You were still struggling with basic small talk. How were you supposed to explain your apprehension in a way that wouldn’t be awkward or too personal? And without getting completely tongue-tied?

“Then don’t think about it. Jus’ say the first thing that comes to your head,” he suggested. 

A deep pull of air. A reaping of your determination. A categorical allotment of your trust in Joel. 

You had to try.

“When you said ‘knock yourself out’, it reminded me of the-the last time I tried to sneak a piece of jerky, because .. because I was so hungry... Sam didn’t feed me. And thirsty. He was asleep. Drunk. I snuck. Wasn’t roped to the bed. I got out. Got out.”

Your voice became more uneven the further you got into recounting that night.

“And they- they had dropped on the floor– the jerky, a piece on the floor. But they were asleep. The men. I thought. Distracted because I was hungry and thirsty. And. It was- but they caught me. That’s how I ended up … that’s how I got my…,” you trailed, gesturing towards your cheek when your words failed you. 

You blinked a few times as you processed how amazing it felt to have just managed to get most of that out without tripping over every other word.

When you focused back on Joel, the unbridled rage in his face made you freeze. He looked dangerous. 

“M’sorry,” he gritted, shutting his eyes for a moment. “Not mad at you,” he assured you, picking up on your trepidation at his incensed state.

“Just … Makes my blood boil. That somebody did that to you.” 

Your eyes flitted down to Joel’s fist clenching and unclenching. Rather than feeling frightened, the tight spot in your chest loosened ever so slightly.

“Can’t imagine…how anyone could do that.. to you…” He shook his head in angry jerks. 

You were secretly pleased that you weren’t the only one who had trouble expressing difficult feelings and thoughts. Maybe Joel was someone who understood how hard it was for you to just get things out there in a way others could understand. 

His eyes snapped open. His expression was still furious, but didn’t hold the same lethal bite from before.

“Fuck ‘em,” he bit out in a humorless laugh. “Glad Tommy killed that piece of shit. Glad they all got their shit wrecked up on that mountain. Bunch of dumbasses couldn’t even keep a low profile. Bound to die sooner or later, so fuckin’ stupid. Deserved worse than they got, though. Wish they woulda suffered more.” 

You stared in wonder at Joel’s circling thoughts and felt little prickles of exhilaration blooming over your skin at the way he had responded to the circumstances you had endured. It sent a thrill up your spine so forceful you shivered slightly.

“I… Me, too,” you agreed.

“You’re gonna eat as much fuckin’ jerky as you want, you understand? And you’re takin’ that with you when Ellie gets back with your food. Keep it in your room, eat it whenever the hell you want to,” he demanded, pointing a stern finger at the packet in your hand.

“Okay,” you breathe. A wide grin rearranged your entire face into an expression of fiendish delight. You felt a surge of adrenaline over Joel’s impassioned appeal to your wellbeing and the sheer potency of his defense on your behalf.

He huffed a small laugh through his nose at your impish expression and seemed to shift away from the anger directed at the monsters in your history. 

You sat in the kitchen together as you nibbled at your jerky. Joel helped himself to a piece, and you sat in a comfortable silence until Ellie returned with the groceries for you and Susan.

“Here ya go,” she puffed with a smile as she dropped the bags onto the table. “Ooooh, jerky!” She nabbed a piece beside your hand, and you felt a rush of pride when you didn’t even flinch. Your lips knit together as you tried to contain your self-conscious but elated smile.  Joel grinned at you, noticing your reaction and making the connection to its catalyst.

Your efforts to contain your glee dissolved, and you directed your proud smile towards the table. Maintaining eye contact was too much with these kinds of strong reactions you were fielding. Sometimes you just had to look away to help level yourself.

Even the good moments like this inundated you with thoughts and feelings that needed to be processed - just like the blanket Susan was making you. It would have to wait until tonight for you to mull it over.

As if he had a front row seat to your inner workings, Joel announced he would help to carry the food over to your house. He snatched the bag of jerky from Ellie, who promptly let out a, “Hey what the fuck, man?!” You snickered quietly at her accusation that held no real hostility.

“Well well well, glad to see somebody’s feeling better,” she chirped and jutted her chin at you. You shrugged once into your shoulder but didn’t shy away from her assessment.

“Shut up, Ellie,” Joel grumbled.

“Hey, come back over some time! It’s so fucking boring with just Joel around,” she heckled, twisting her way to Joel’s side when he tried blocking her off from you.

“Pain in my ass,” Joel mumbled theatrically, but you caught the way he held back a smirk.

“Oh. Oka- Yes. Def-Yes,” you titter. The blush on your cheeks wasn’t from anger this time, instead a giddy relief that you somehow hadn’t managed to drive these people away from you. Even your fluctuations between every point on the spectrum of human emotion at a moment’s notice hadn’t been too much for them. They seemed to just take it in stride. They seemed to handle it better than you did, if you were being honest with yourself.

When Joel walked you back, refusing to let you carry a single thing, you worked up the nerve to discuss something with him that had been weighing on you.

“Hey. Did you … the other day. With the snow. And everything,” you rambled. “Did you say .. to Tommy and Maria? Say anything to them?”

“No,” he replied. You paused in surprise at his answer. You had been so certain he must have gone to tell them all about your erratic behavior.

“No?” you repeat. 

“None of their business,” he asserted. “And none of today is their business, either.”

You took a moment to digest the meaning of his words. He hadn’t told anyone about your first meeting and how bizarre it was. He wasn’t going to say anything to anyone about today. Your attention shifted to your front door only a stride away and then back to Joel.

Seeming to understand your unasked question, he added, “And Susan doesn’t need to know all your business, either.”

Your hunched shoulders relaxed, and you closed your eyes as you culled a full breath into your lungs. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me. You just keep on. You’ll be okay,” he asserted in that same confident tone that had a rapid sedating effect on your nerves.

You patted his arm in gratitude with three quick taps before snapping your hand back to your side. The corner of his mouth twitched up at your friendly gesture. 

“Here, take these now.” He handed the bags of food to you before rapping his knuckles against the door. You bounced on the balls of your feet just a little when you managed to not jerk away from the noise. Joel gave you the same grin from the kitchen table when you had your last moment of pride. You sunk your teeth into your bottom lip to keep your smile from growing bigger.

“And, what Ellie said earlier, about comin’ over sometime, we’d enjoy the company,” he said. You didn’t have a chance to answer him other than a soft gasp of disbelief and delight before the door swung open.

Susan stood in the doorway and remarked on Joel’s surprise appearance, expecting to see Maria with you. Shit. The next time Maria came over, Susan was bound to talk to her about your outing and find out you had foolishly gone alone.

“Me’n Ellie caught her just as we were headin’ out. Goin’ to get our shoppin’ done, too. She did real good, Susan. Whatever you’re doin’ is helpin’, I think,” he said as he jerked his head in your direction. 

You nodded with enthusiasm at Joel’s cover for you. Bless this man and his skillful lying! you sang to yourself. “Oh, Bug! That’s wonderful!” she lilted. Her excitement was palpable.

“You know, Joel, usually Maria stops by about once a week to fetch me some things, but it might just work out that Bug could start doing the shopping when you and Ellie go out. Now with two people in the house, we’ll need to keep more food around. I’m sure however often you and Ellie go would be about the same we’d need to do our shopping, too.”

An eyebrow shot up to your hairline at Susan’s estimation. Joel, the bulky, broad man next to you? That could probably eat a Thanksgiving tier meal three times a day, every day? You doubted you and Susan’s intake combined would put a dent in Joel’s diet. If he and Ellie didn’t make multiple trips a week to the store or the canteen, you were certain they were lugging back more than just two measly fabric bags of food. 

“Sure thing, Susan,” Joel replied. You looked up at him in surprise. “That is, if you’re alright with it?”

“I, of course. Of course. That sounds good,” you agree. Maybe going with him and Ellie would be better than Maria. After all, today’s outburst at least gave them an idea of what to expect if things went south again.

“Alright, great. I’ll let y’all two get inside where it’s warm.” Joel stepped aside for you to enter and gave a quick wave before heading off.

You tucked the carrots into the fridge while Susan unpacked the second bag.

“See, Bug? I promised you that they were great to have around for some help. Isn’t Joel such a nice man?” she asked. “Yes. Yes, he is,” you answer.

It was the only thing you had said today with swift, unconditional certainty.

The next week rolled around, and you made your way to Ellie and Joel’s for your market trip. Joel answered the door and started to lock it and head out. “Ellie’s at some school somethin’ or other today. Bitched about it all mornin’. Just you and me today if that’s alright,” he explained.

“Oh. Sure. That’s-That’s fine,” you reply.

“Alright, if you’re sure.” He paused for a moment before adding, “And I’dda had you come in while I finished up the dishes, but I wasn’t sure you’d be okay with that or not.”

“I-I think that would’ve been okay,” you lie. Joel’s lip twitched, but he was kind enough to not vocalize the fact that you both knew you weren’t telling the truth.

“I’m-I mean it. I do. Being around you. It’s fine. I like it. Being around you,” you blurt out unceremoniously. Embarrassment started to creep up your spine at your tactless social etiquette, but you pushed it down. You refused to feel shame for your lack of decorum aftering spending so many years alone or worse yet in the company of those you’d hesitate to even call human beings.

Joel didn’t say anything at first, although his quirked brow and upward tug at the corner of his mouth gave the impression that he was at least amused by you.

“I’m glad t’say it’s the same for me,” he chuckled. His lack of reaction at your awkward outburst made you feel like you should explain yourself.

“Thanks.” The conversation lulled, and you tried to steal a few furtive glances at Joel. Not satisfied with the glimpses you were managing, you settled into a loop of peeks that you knew were much too close to gawking for it to go unnoticed.

 Joel didn’t shift or seem uncomfortable under your watch. It was as if he didn’t have a care in the world. 

You’d give anything to feel like that.

“My people- My social skills aren’t too great. Sorry,” you excuse yourself in a hurry.

Joel simply shrugged, clearly not going to engage in your negative self-talk.

“Guess that’s what being kidnapped and kept prisoner for two years does to you,” you laugh hollowly.

Joel did stiffen at the casually lobbed statement you offered up as if it weren’t absolutely gut-wrenching and devastating. You blatantly stared up at him, wanting to see his reaction.

“Honey, you’re better company than just about anybody I’ve met in Jackson, so I’d encourage you to not get stuck on shit like that,” he contended firmly with an unwavering gaze set on you to match.

“S-Sure you don’t just-just put up with me? Because you, ‘cause you feel sorry for me?” The words came spilling out of your mouth before you could stop them.

“I wouldn’t put up with somebody if I didn’t want to,” he corrected. 

You felt a warmth in your chest at his admission. You wished you could also claim you wouldn’t be around somebody if you didn’t like them, but you had just spent month after month after month of your life doing just the opposite.

“I’m just, you know, just trying to learn. Learn how to be… around people?” Again, the words spilled over without thought. Joel’s low reactivity somehow made him into a sort of sounding board.

“You and me both,” Joel chuckled.

You tilted your head in question. He seemed to interact with people just fine. He didn’t seem anxious at all whenever he spoke to anyone. Sure, he didn’t say much usually, but you never got the impression that he felt nervous. 

You’d give anything to feel like that.

“But you talk to everyone just fine,” you counter.

Joel laughed some more and shook his head in disagreement. “No. I simply do what I have to in order to get by. Simple as that.”

Your body flexed in response to his offhand remark. If that’s what Joel was doing, did that mean you were going to have to do the same? More fakery?  More saying whatever people want to hear so that your life is easier? More forgoing your own wishes just so you aren’t in danger? Being a different person entirely just because it kept you safer than being yourself and listening to your own desires and wishes?

You curled and uncurled your hands at your sides in frustration. “Somethin’ I said?” Joel leaned over to get a better view of you.

You averted your face so you didn’t have to look at him. “S’nothing.”

He walked silently for a moment before it seemed he had an idea of what you had reacted to.

“Nothin’ wrong with doin’ what you have to, to survive,” he said sternly. 

You glanced back up at him. The mist over your eyes clouded your vision slightly, but you didn’t risk blinking it back and sending it spilling over.

“But you don’t have to do that sorta thing here, you understand me? Talk to who you wanna talk to. Say what you wanna say. You don’t owe anybody shit.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, willing the gathering wet in your eyes to recede.

“Hey.” Joel’s voice was so soft you would’ve missed it if you weren’t on such high alert already. You sniffed back your frustration and turned to look up at him when he stopped. You really didn’t need to cry in front of this man. Again.

“I’m gonna say somethin’, and you need to listen to me,” he said slowly. His hand sort of hovered near your shoulder as if he had intended to place it there but thought better of it at the last minute. “You can keep me company any time you see fit. You might feel self-conscious at the way you talk with people, but I like it.” 

You blinked and stared back at him, unsure if he was telling the truth or just trying to make you feel better. 

“I mean it. Half the time people talk around what they’re really tryin’ to say, and it drives me nuts. You? You just say it. You try to, even though I know it’s hard for you. You say what you’re thinkin’. You got the guts to say what’s on your mind. I like it. Takes the guess work outta things. Makes it easier to talk when it’s somebody like that.”

The tears you had tried so hard to keep in check were now teetering on your lashes. “I hope you like how I talk freely with ya, too.” His tone took a questioning turn, and you could only laugh at his unwarranted uncertainty.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do,” you warble. “Trying to trust people. You’re doing a- doing a pretty good job of m-making that easier for me, Joel.”

You dug your nails into the palms of your hands to keep from crying even though you were sure Joel could see the wet lumps brimming along your eyes.

“And thanks for saying that you, um, that you like b-being around me.” It came out more pitiful than you had intended, but it was out there now.

“Not a hard sell when somebody’s easy to be around,” he shrugged.

The movement of your face rearranging into a smile pushed the teetering pools onto the curves of your face in little rivulets. Joel’s thumb twitched as though he was considering brushing them off for you, but you shook your head in warning and scrubbed the heels of your palm over your face to dry them up before he could.

A small frown curved into the line of Joel’s mouth as he lowered his hands to his sides in an almost apologetic motion.

“Too much still,” you reminded him. “Nothing to-to do with you.”

He nodded in understanding and motioned for the two of you to continue walking.

You waited a few beats to collect yourself before trying to start up a conversation again. 

“You know that, uh, you’re-you’re in big trouble, right?”

Joel’s head snapped to attention, and you worried you had overplayed your joke.

“Yeah, I hafta use some of the slips for s’more jerky,” you tease. “Your fault.”

Joel cracked a wide grin when he realized you were trying to give him a hard time.

“Already polished off the bag I gave you, huh?” he taunted with equal levity.

“Actually, yeah. I-I did. Is that bad?” you ask in earnest.

Joel sniffed a laugh and replied, “Nope. Already told’ya you’re under strict orders to eat as much of it as often as you want.”

You were glad it wasn’t actually a bad thing that you were having to use some of Susan’s slips just to support your jerky habit. 

“A-Affirmative, lieutenant,” you giggle. You hoped your play on Joel’s wording of “strict orders” landed.

“Christ you’re a mess,” Joel laughed, and you gladly joined him with a timid one of your own.

Turns out Joel's struggles with communicating feelings improve greatly when presented with somebody who's even worse at it than he is lmao.

Also, I know it's not really funny considering the context, but Joel angrily commanding somebody to eat jerky is hilarious to me.

What are y'all's thoughts on the story so far? Would love to hear from you. :)

And thank you to everyone who has been interacting and even reblogging my silly little fics. It's so kind of you, and I appreciate it!

Catch ya later, 

♥Puddles♥

#fic: feral woman #fw #joel miller #joel miller x reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #tlou fic #tlou fanfiction #the last of us

[gelu-the-babosa-multiversal]

Doing some stuff combining the fandoms I'm hyperexciting.

The kids + Morocco in the One Piece universe should be fun (angsty)

If you guys have ideas for this crossover just send asks or comment/reblog this post

#my stuff #my art #art #sketch #screenshot #ibispaintx #au #crossover #maccadam #transformers #tf #rescue bots #transformers rescue bots #tfrb #rb #one piece #op #wanted poster #one piece wanted poster #cody burns #frankie greene #priscilla pynch #doctor thaddeus morocco #thaddeus morocco #part of the multiverse #they having fun (I lie)

[transpanda-1]

Birds of Prey might feature Katherine Karlo in the near future

So for those of you not in the know, the new (gorgeously drawn) Birds of Prey is following Black Canary saving her sister from a doomsday scenario, and featuring a breakout role for Maps Mizoguchi, a character who was prominent in Gotham Academy

But, from careful observation (straw grabbing and bias), there might be another from Gotham Academy making an appearance, Katherine

Katherine Karlo is one of Maps' closest friends and her main roommate for the run of Gotham Academy (pretty sure). While not altogether that important in the run, she made a notably important role with Maps in the mainline Batman comics.

Now Maps getting a leading role, even if for one story, in a main Batman comic probably helped keep her on people's minds before her debut as superhero from the future, Meridian.

BUT Katherine being included could be indicative of the same treatment, even if a lesser role!

Furthermore, we'd like to point out one of the characters being included in the new BOP run is Cassandra Cain, who some readers may remember as being one of the very few genuine friends made of Katherine's dad Basil Karlo, AKA Clayface

Intentionally or not, we now have two characters on the team who have had very close ties to a shapeshifting clay Karlo. Bordering on "one of very few friends" territory, too.

(Unsure if Harley should be counted with her show heavily featuring Clayface, but just mentioning that. Clayface is sort of making a surge in relevance lately with The Batman II slated to feature him)

We're getting into stretching territory, but there's a few more things we want to mention that... *could* be something, but might not.

First, this mission involves going to Themyscira, or the islands of the Amazons that Wonder Woman originates from. Who... is made of clay

It's unknown if Wonder Woman will appear, but they do actively talk about her in the second chapter, which may be foreshadowing. But she is a canon clay woman! (We also heard Nubia may be too?)

A lot of clay character hovering around the skirts of this story...

Second is... this specific wording from Big Barda when Maps goes back to the future(?)

"The one from the future was made of dirt?" ...Dirt? Why dirt? She looks more like snow, or potentially electricity or static. And Big Barda is smart, she's royal and uses boom tubes to travel great distances across space. Dirt's, well, brown, Barda knows that.

"Made of dirt" is a small line but it doesn't really make sense to us based both on the visual AND the character's knowledge. Unless it's supposed to mean "We need to allude to clay/mud but can't SAY say clay or mud because that's too obvious." Made of dirt too, there's just a lot to possibly unpack there.

But the weird thing is the only thing we can really pull from that is... could Katherine is pretending to be Maps *right now*?

Unlikely, but it might explain why peppy, hyperexcitable Maps's adult self was... oddly quiet after introducing herself. Not to mention she'd leave right before the part of the mission that involves swimming...

She at least seems to be working with someone, judging by the way her little device goes off (or hit her time travel time limit, idk...!)

(Also we're a bit curious why her superhero name is Meridian specifically. It's a geographical map term to describe lines going upwards from the north to south pole, and there's a prime Meridian, which is cute for Maps' dnd obsession but is there something more?)

We understand if Katherine doesn't make an appearance, but we hope we maybe convinced you how there could be a chance for the character to appear sometime in the story!!

Thank you for reading through this and listening to our rambles about a fellow clay girl...! (-Annie🤎)

#katherine karlo #maps mizoguchi #clayface #batman #birds of prey #cassandra cain #big barda #chirps #🪴Annie🤎

[bathask]

自閉症スペクトラム障害光るもの興味DSM-5診断基準で隣家の太陽反射光と翳りの連続階調,弱い中枢性統合WCCやmonotropismで繰り返す花柄模様壁紙,気になり視線囚われる。大人の発達障害アスペルガー症候群/自閉スペクトラム症の精神科病院通院日に就労継続支援B型事業所芋煮会重なり通所時,何とかせねば

#snapseed #autism spectrum disorder #high functioning autism #visual stimulus #light and shadow #obsessed with lights #fascination with lights #floral pattern #repetitive pattern #wallpaper #hyperexcitability #excessive awakenings

[helenwhiteart-blog]

Synesthesia or salience: autism and environmental sensitivity

To be honest, the whole of my life has felt like one giant participatory science project, though I’m not actually “a scientist”, a statement that does its best to reflect a most particular and extremely hardwired approach to life that is “mine” and which extends back to my earliest attempts to systemise and make sense of a highly perplexing world. I don’t just lie on my back watching life happen;…

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#articles #autism sensory processing #EMF salience #EMF sensitivity #environmental sensitivity #Highly Sensitive Person #hyperexcitability #hypervigilence #migraine and synesthesia #neural excitability #space weather sensitivity #synesthesia #systemisation #tinnitus and synesthesia #weather salience

[katyspersonal]

your mutual friend group is terrifying and i love it

PFFFFTTTTtttTttTT I am glad to hear this, anon xD Honestly my random morbid cannibalism jokes is not even our final form, usually it goes more like:

nobody:

me, hyperexcited: GUYYYS GUYS I just realised something after playing BLORBOrne for 50th time, I am such a dumbass ahaha! Turns out that there is a very hard to see detail in the data of Boris (datamined by Russian hackers: ( x ))! The shade of his right eye is kinda white-ish which lines up with theme of losing eye color upon becoming a furry, so despite boasting about his grip he has been secretly reading furry pr0n comics more than he should have! (tagged: #blorborne #boris the cocksucker #blorborne observation #as usual I notice this kind of shit too late AAAAAAAAA #listen it is 5 AM don't @ me)

someone: Katy pls I don't even know who Boris IS 😭

me: What do you mean, he is an easy to miss summon in Horse-Plinked Village!!! By the way, there is a bunch of lore that can be concluded from his items that he never uses but they are in the game files, even though he doesn't have any dialogue!

someone: 😭😭😭

my friends FANDOMette, Wow and Chicken: *reblogging* (tagged: #this is sooooo interesting #really nice observation I never thought about that #I am NOT normal about this #blorborne #boris the cocksucker #nice to finally see more ideas about boris)

fareehaandtheitalians: Girl this is incredible I HAVE NO WORDS, I feel like I am gaining Insight points when I am reading your posts

Jara that reads like 'jara' and not like 'yara' lol: *reblogging* (tagged: #yeah nobody is really safe from corruption in this setting #just like in real life xd #no wonder that I like this game so much because it is just as hopeless as reality #xd #bloorborne)

Chicken: *reblogging from Jara that reads like 'jara'* *screenshot of the tags* GIRL ARE YOU OK 💀💀💀

me: *reblogging from Chicken* NO ONE WITH AT LEAST A BASIC AMOUNT OF BRAINCELLS CAN FEEL OK IT IS NO ONE'S FAULT THAT YOU THINK LIFE IS ANYTHING BUT FARM OF SUFFERING

me and Chicken: *start fighting in the reblogs with progressively ridiculous points about meaning of life and idiotic memes*

fareehaandtheitalians: *already started doodling a meme based on this, as if to immortalize it in a tapestry*

Boom: *reblogging the showdown at its final point when me and Chicken already obliterated one another into a bloody mess* (tagged: #ehehe #stay silly you two!)

other Elden Twink mutuals: *eat popcorn*

Comic: *reblogging* WHY CAN'T YOU TWO BE LEFT WITHOUT BEING WATCHED FOR EVEN ONE DAY?!

Jara that reads like 'jara': Lol I made everything become cursed again xd

Chicken: No, Jara (reads like 'jara'), it is not your fault! You see, none of this would have happened if SOMEONE finally admitted that they are simping for [insert a character that either has the worst haircut in the setting or is so generic-looking that it actually embarrasses me]

robertzombie: *reblogging* She WHAT? People in this fandom have the worst taste I swear

me: You see FRIEND, we will know who ACTUALLY has a bad "taste" when I try a meal out of certain "bird" if you see what I mean.....

Fandomette: KATY NO, DON'T EAT YOUR FRIENDS... You wanted to eat Mewmecolash or something stop 😭

me: WHY ABSOLUTELY EVERY SINGLE PERSON IS SO DEADSET ON OUTING MY SECRETS FOR RANDOM PEOPLE TO READ?????? (tagged: #lmao as if anyone is going to read us after shit like this)

Chicken: THIS IS REVENGE FOR YOU MOCKING MY SON SURPHERROTH MWAHAHAHAHA

me: I AM ENDING THIS POINTLESS FIGHT HERE BECAUSE UNLIKE YOU PUNKS I HAVE SOME REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO *spends the rest of the day napping or watching cursed Elden Twink challenges letsplays*

Wow: *messaging me in Discord* Dammit what was THAT hahaha

me: Thank you for NOT having my back as usual, well, at least you are good for finishing a dumb post with lol

#LOL!!!!!!!!!! #i am glad! #ask replies #mutuals #no context #shitposting #lore council #okay sorry I won't do it again xddddd

[weberina]

I wish I had stumbled upon Feynman's lectures in high school. It's weird how things that used to be a disconnected mess are all now falling into place. And he sounds crazy. Hyperexcited, bouncing-off-the-walls kind of crazy. And I'm only reading him not watching the videos.

Also I now can't stop thinking about jiggling corks in the water.

#Feynman lectures #richard feynman

[greenelectricsky]

Hello, Catsies!!!!!

Today is 04.04. and I'm hyperexcited!!! Nix, Rat Guy and I have the pleasure of inviting all (you never see rules like "shippers leave" or "non shippers leave", all means all) of you to our server "Cat's live and mischief" where you can chat, chill or roleplay as your favourite character or OC(s) from Cats!!!!!

Link to that madness is here:

Have fun!

Lovies!!!!!!! <3<3<3<3<3<3<3

[enchantedchocolatebars]

Hatsune Miku Birthday Headcanons! 👑 💙 🥳 🧁 🍰 🎁 🎂 🎉 🕯️

👑 Original headcanons 💙

🥳 Ao3 version 🧁

• When Miku wakes up, an elated smile appears on her face as she knows what day today is.

• Today is August 31st, her birthday!

• While on her computer, Miku smiles and blushes as she scrolls through numerous birthday messages sent to her by her fans.

• When she goes outside, her smile grows as she sees a mountain of birthday cards, letters, and presents at her door.

• The blue-haired pop star is utterly delighted when her Vocaloid pals surprise her with gifts and a vanilla buttercream cake shaped as a leek.

• Rin, Len, Luka, Kaito, and Meiko each take Miku somewhere fun to celebrate her birthday.

•Miku and Rin go to a shopping mall in Koshigaya, Saitama. While there, a montage begins as “Suki Kirai” starts to play. In the montage, Miku and Rin shop in various stores, try on different cute outfits in a changing room, get their pictures taken in a photo booth, get their nails done at a salon, and run and hide from paparazzi. The girls breathe a sigh of relief and continue with their day when they see that the freelance photographers are gone. Later, Miku and Rin are approached by two hyperexcited cosplayers dressed as them. The Miku cosplayer takes out her phone and asks if she and her friend can take a picture with them. Miku and Rin give the two a nod of approval and take a bunch of pictures with them, ending the montage.

• Len takes Miku to an arcade in Akihabara. The two play various games together like Pac-Man, a shooting game, a racing game, a fighting game, Taiko no Tatsujin, and Dance Dance Revolution (In the DDR game, various Vocaloids are shown as playable characters. Miku and Len play as themselves and the songs they select are Vocaloid songs such as “Soar”, “Yellow”, and “Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder”). Before they leave, Len wins a Miku plushie in a claw machine for Miku.

• Miku and Luka head to a cafe in Shibuya to snack on some sweet treats. They bring Hachune Miku and Tako Luka along with them. At the cafe, Miku and Luka cheerily eat sweets that are themed to look like them, while Hachune and Tako have a fun, over-the-top food fight in the background. Miku and Luka don’t notice the utter chaos that their chibis are causing. After that, the four go to a Mt. Fuji Hot Springs.

• Kaito takes Miku to a Cold Stone Creamery in Shinjuku for ice cream. Because it's her birthday, she receives free ice cream.

• Miku and Meiko go see a movie together in Osaka. They then proceed to a karaoke bar located nearby to sing their hearts out. Everything is going fine as the two take turns singing until Meiko decides to have too much to drink and gets extremely drunk. Miku now has to help the older lady sober up.

• At Miku’s birthday bash concert, Rin, Len, Luka, Kaito, and Meiko all perform the song “Birthday Song for Miku” for Miku. The twintail singer tears up with joy and thanks her friends for such an amazing song and performance! For the rest of the concert, Miku sings some of her favorite songs while wearing her 2020 birthday dress!

•The songs she sings are “World is Mine”, “Melt”, “Po Pi Po”, “Ai Kotoba”, “Tell Your World”, “Miku Miku Ni Shite Ageru”, “The Snow White Princess Is”, “The Intense Voice of Hatsune Miku”, “Romeo and Cinderella”, “Senbonzakura”, “Rolling Girl”, “The Disappearance of Hatsune Miku”, “Levan Polka”, “Kocchi Muite Baby”, and “Weekender Girl”.

#anime #vocaloid #hatsune miku #miku #vocaloid miku #rin kagamine #vocaloid rin #len kagamine #vocaloid len #luka megurine #vocaloid luka #vocaloid meiko #meiko vocaloid #vocaloid kaito #kaito vocaloid #ao3 #a03 #ao3 link #a03 link #ao3 writer #a03 writer #headcanon #headcanons #writing #my writing

[fifi-goes-to-hollywood]

How does Igor get along with Nace? How do the turtles get along with Jan?

Both answers - it’s going good! But let’s dip in details. (When it comes to Nace’s zoo, imma mention Ollie as well)

Igor was first reserved, he usually is when a new human invades his territory (meets Jan). But a few miracles happened: he has never hissed at Nace (he used to hiss at the rest of JO, but got used to them) and wanted pets (but occasionally liked to run away when dog smell was too strong)! He got used to Nace pretty quickly and now Nace is the only non-Peteh who can carry him without being scratched. Igor trusted Nace enough.

Turtles were pretty chill with Jan, they just don’t care. And Ollie was so excited while seeing new human. You know, hyperexcited puppy. Love at first sight. And Ollie is obsessed over Jan, always coming for pets and snacks. He has never minded cat smell and lets Jan do what he wants. Sometimes he chooses Jan as the walk companion.

#yay another cute ask! #otp asks #joker out #nace jordan #jan peteh

[greentrickster]

(Btw, in regards to asexuality and the SVSSS thread I've been talking about the subject in, I promise I'm not being weird, this is just a case of my interests in literature and anthropology coinciding to form hyperexcitement in regards to exploring an aspect of the human experience via storytelling. Also, asexuality is definitely one of the sexualities that could using more loving attention in media, in regards to general low-key representation through to characters who identify as asexual getting a chance to explore this aspect of themselves, and I would like to see that.)

#my thoughts #asexual #asexuality