#how many fucking movie sequels do i have due?

[aroeddiediaz]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @cal-daisies-and-briars , @jesuiscenseedormir , @diazsdimples

How many works do you have on ao3?

27!

What's your total ao3 word count?

61,537

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently I’m pretty much exclusively a 9-1-1 writer, but in the past I wrote a lot of Flarrowverse (do they still call it that?). I also have published fics for Fantastic Beasts and a few anime (Given, Haikyuu, Saiki K). Given the number of Bnha wips i have locked away in the vault it’s amazing I don’t have anything published for that.

Top 5 fics by kudos:

(I am omitting all the Flarrowverse fics in my top 5 on the basis that they were written in high school and I’ve changed as a person, and they probably only beat out on the numbers due to being up for years longer)

1. Kabe-Do’s and Kabe-Don’ts (Given, 861 kudos)

2. You’re Not Special (Saiki K, 598 kudos)

3. How Eddie Learned To Stop Worrying And Embrace The Kitten Life (9-1-1, 327 kudos)

4. The Boy Formerly Known As Miracle (Haikyuu, 277 kudos)

5. Under The Hood (9-1-1, 275 kudos)

Do you respond to comments?

Yes!! As many as I can!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This probably has to be The Crimes of Queenie Goldstein, in which Queenie is put on trial for her actions during the war. Don’t @ me but Queenie turning traitor was bu far the most interesting part of the Crimes of Grindelwald (the only interesting thing, really). There could be such an interesting story between her and Tina if only JKR would let the movies out of her grasp.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Fuck, idk if I have a happiest ending fic, a lot of them tend to not have that much story arc. (A lot of established relationship fluff or smut lmao). I guess if I had to pick one it would probably be How Eddie Learned To Stop Worrying and Embrace The Kitten Life.

Do you get hate on fics?

Not since that one anti-olicity fic that I wrote while deep in the trenches of Flarrowverse discourse, which I totally deserved :/. I have regrets. Also I should probably orphan/delete that one if I haven’t already. In my defense, high school. I have learned.

Do you write smut?

Yea lol. I think my 9-1-1 stuff has been almost exclusively smut. Idk how it happened. (I do know how it happened smut is fun to write)

Craziest crossover?

I haven’t published any of my crossover fics :( none of them have been complete enough. I have many many unfinished RotBTD wips that have never seen the light of day though.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Who would steal my stuff? Lol

Have you ever had a fic translated?

One time someone offered to translate one of my fics into Russian but idk if that ever actually happened.

Have you co-written a fic before?

Nope

All time favorite ship?

Right now definitely Buddie! Percabeth holds a special place in my heart though <3

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Ok. After the end of the Heroes of Olympus Series, but before Trials of Apollo was announced, I tried my own hand at writing the sequel that was clearly coming based on all the loose threads in the final book. It was going to be a Solangelo quest to save the Oracle of Delphi from Python, while Akhys tries to poison Percy to turn him into an evil god(?). Half the details have been lost and I desperately want to remember them, because I haven’t attempted anything nearly as cool or ambitious since then. The first 5 chapters are posted on my ao3 (Will Solace and the Oracle’s Cry) and I still think high school me had the most interesting characterization of Will out of everyone else on the internet at the time. Even if it is still very 2015.

What are your writing strengths?

I think I’m good at getting into the heads of different characters. Understanding their motives and weaknesses.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Editing.

Lmao I have a lot of weaknesses but I definitely struggle the most with trying to look back on or change things I’ve already written, even when it’s necessary.

Also my tendency to just drop fics if I stop working on them for too long. Rip to my wip graveyard.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

That’s a minefield I’m not willing to play in. Unless it’s Chinese. Very limited amounts of Chinese. Or like, a pet name or phrase that’s already ubiquitous in fandom so I’m not risking anything.

First fandom you wrote in?

Percy Jackson!! That Will Solace quest is the first thing I ever wrote! I definitely had a tendency to jump into the deep end with new hobbies lmao. Like my first ever cosplay that took me 3 years to complete.

Favorite fic you've written?

I think my favorite fic is always going to be the one I’m currently working on writing. But I am very proud of the silly little dramatic ironies in In Hindsight, which I wrote entirely over one long lunch the day after 7x04 broke me. Also I have to shoutout Teacher’s Pet, that one ruler spanking fic nobody ever reads because it’s Eddie/Ana lmao. I enjoyed putting in a bunch of tiny incompatibilities between them. So, uh, I guess my favorite thing in my own writing is dramatic irony?

Tagging: @aspecbuddie @pirrusstuff @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @lemonzestywrites @your-catfish-friend @inkmortal-trash389 @evanbegins s @wildlife4life @eddiebabygirldiaz @epicbuddieficrecs @kitteneddiediaz @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @coatedpanda16 @nicotinewrites @estheticpotaeto @babytrapperdiaz @snowviolettwhite @wikiangela

#artemis writing

[the-acid-pear]

I love never watching sequels 🤪

#luly talks #how many fucking movie sequels do i have due? #sonic shrek uhhh whatever rob zombie movie saga is callled #john wick but im not doing that #well its not taht much but i just dont want to #i just hate rewatching sequels...... remember how long i took to watch tbs 2??

[david-talks-sw]

any new Star Wars essays in the making, or are you moving on?

I don't know, honestly.

Part of it is "life gets in the way," I'm working a lot and so whatever time I have left is spent just messing around or meeting with my loved ones.

I've got a bunch of stuff in my drafts. I don't mind sharing it here, most recent to oldest:

Sort of a joke post of me pointing out how stressful being George Lucas' producer must've been, like this guy really DIDN'T WANT to write his fucking scripts, did he? Poor Rick McCallum. Abandoned because who gives a crap.

'Ask' reply on how EU-fueled fandom perception of the Jedi was flipped by the prequels.

'Ask' reply about the themes in Ahsoka and why the show doesn't know what it's about. Problem is, I go about it starting from the basics, so nobody's gonna sit through reading a tematic breakdown of the first Pirates of the Carribean movie, The Batman and the original six Star Wars films before I even get to the show at hand.

"Part II" post about what Ahsoka, Rebels and TCW get right about lightsaber duels, which the Prequels never did.

Quote collection & analysis on just how complex the Prequels were meant to be (in the late 80s, Lucas intimated that the Sequels were the story that was supposed to have gray morality, not the Prequels)

Quote collection on how the themes and principles of Star Wars align with Lucas' own opinions and philosophies.

Quote collection on Lucas defining Anakin's flaws.

Quote collection on Lucas talking about the fact that we need to be more proactive, which aligns with what Lumi points out sometimes about the Jedi: they should've been more politically engaged because we all should be.

Why I approach Lucas as "word of god".

Personal life/joke-y post dating from the time of the WGA strike about how Jack Black's School of Rock lyrics "In his heart he knew, the artist must be true, but the legend of the rent was way past due!" applied to me. Abandoned because I didn't wanna bum everyone out.

Correcting the notion that Dark Times-era Jedi such as Kanan or Ezra or Ahsoka represent what Jedi were supposed to be.

A comprehensive end-all outlook on how Anakin's flaws all tie together. I've written this one twice and I don't know how to differentiate it from my other posts.

A secret "Part 3" to my TLJ Luke post, in which I point out that RJ's being too "indie", while being a strong point for a big chunk of the film, hampers the film's ability to make Luke feel as badass as he does on paper. I want to illustrate a storyboard for this one, but that takes time.

The evolution of Star Wars' approach to transmedia.

Debunking Star Wars myths: a (very) comprehensive outlook on children in the Jedi Order.

Problem is that only like 2/3rds of these are fully-written... and I still need to find the relevant clips, turn them into GIFs, etc etc.

There's many other interesting Asks in my inbox btw. But I'm already behind on all these, so I haven't begun to touch them.

Then there's the drawings.

I wanna draw a comic of the meeting between Yoda and Dooku in Dark Rendezvous. I wanna finish the comic fight between Maul and Ben. I wanna draw Mace, Shaak Ti, I've got a Luminara fan-art that was supposed to be ready for Jedi June 2022 and an Anakin drawing that looks weird. No time, nor am I skilled enough. (Like, I trace, that's what I do, it's not a secret I've said so before... but it takes me a long while to do so. I'm not fast at drawing, let alone coloring.) I could commission some of these, but there are obvious obstacles there.

There's fun tidbits I've discovered here and there but nobody will care about them and I usually try to not drown my blog with bs posts.

Then there's the bigger problem.

All the things I've listed above? I'm not 100% motivated to finish. But a lot of the new stuff I wanna write about is hella negative.

I had a lot of stuff I wanted to say about Ahsoka. But it wasn't all good. It was mostly me bitching, be it about the show or the fandom's reactions to it.

I've also got more stuff to say about Filoni's take on Star Wars, but I've talked about why it's inaccurate like 8 times already, and I don't actually dislike the guy, like there's plenty of things he knows and does that I think are awesome but also people won't stop putting him and his takes on a pedestal and--

oh shit, there's Acolyte too, I forgot about that, gray morality galore, here we come. But here too, like... I've talked a couple of times about why this entire gray morality thing is actually just the gen X-ers trying to make the prequels "cool" and "complex". but I've never explored properly, with quotes and research and shit. but i've talked about it so many times that at this point it'd end up like the Filoni rants, redundant. "we get it already." as if this show didn't have haters lined round the block for absolutely sexist reasons.

Don't get me started on the mountain of lies and/or idiocy that is the YouTuber Star Wars Theory.

And yet he said one thing a few months ago which struck a chord within me and it's the fact that Andor is awesome, excels on all levels because it's treated seriously, like a proper show, not a Disney Plus one... why wasn't Obi-Wan Kenobi? Why wasn't Book of Boba Fett? And I've already established multiple times that I enjoyed Kenobi (yes, including the Reva parts) and I've established that I know what they were going for in Fett and I've established that this is mainly a "Disney Plus didn't know how to structure a fucking show pre-WGA strike" issue more than anything else... but when I think about how these could've been treated instead? When I look at the characterizations and emotional stakes of like Fargo Season 5? It's infuriating. Because it's not bad (talking about Kenobi, BOBF is awful)... but it could've been EXCELLENT and instead it was just "okay" to "good".

I just miss live action lightsaber duels, man. Like, good ones.

and i dunno. maybe I should just let it rip on all this. "go off, king!"

but I think there's so much negativity re: Star Wars that adding my thoughts on these subjects, no matter how structured and reason, will just blend into a wave of needless, un-constructive hate.

maybe I should finish the writings in the drafts and just post them with no gifs, maybe just still images?

but doing any of that feels like a step back.

So that's where I'm at right now.

#just noticed #started this post spelling it “I don't know” and ended it by spelling it “I dunno” #there's all you need to know about where i am right now #sw negativity #i guess? #bummed everyone out after all

[hello-nichya-here]

zutara shippers are so bizarre. if kataang truly is this horrible thing that no one likes then why are you in the asks of someone who doesn’t give a fuck whether ships are accepted by the general fandom or not to try and convince them how bland and awful it is after they expressed that they enjoy it? I’ve never encountered a shipping fandom before that has nearly two decades worth of popularity and is still so obsessed with what people who might enjoy the canon ships (occasionally or hardcore) think. how do they all have a superiority complex yet manage to still be so insecure?

Simple: They never moved on from the need to get canon validation.

There's an old, FAKE interview with Ehasz, in which he supposedly said Zutara was always meant to be, and evil Bryke ruined it by forcing Kataang to happen "out of nowhere." They still try to use that as evidence, even though Ehasz is a Maiko fan and has repeatedly said this interview never fucking happened.

When the live action movie we do not speak of was about to be released, some idiots were saying it would have Zutara and would "replace the show as canon."

Back when Korra was about to first air on Nick, there were Zutara campains about how their OTP could stil happen.

When Bryke announced they were working with Netflix for an adaptation of the show, there were online petitions to make Zutara canon since "kataang already had their turn." When Bryke left the production due some drama we don't know the details of, they were SURE, once again, that it would have Zuko and Katara get together, and that it would be so amazing, it would be seen as the new, and superior, canon.

They know they're popular. But they want to reach the point of being SOOOOOOO popular that basically the whole fandom agrees with them, so some adaptation/sequel will have Zutara be a thing to make sure people will watch it. That way they can claim they were always right. But since they don't have the numbers for that, they keep on pestering other fans to join them - but that only made the Zutara fandom infamous for being super toxic. The fact that many new fans didn't buy into the hype because they watched the show waiting to find all of this "subtext" Zutarians go on and on about, only to realize it was never there, doesn't help either.

And if there's any good side to Bryke having huge egos that sometimes prevents them from listening to genuine criticism, is that it also prevents them from falling into the trap of trying to pander to the audience. I don't trust Netflix not to give it a go, but based on their record, I doubt they can come ever close to capture the magic of Avatar, so it would not be the big win Zutarians have been pining for.

#asks #anti zutara

[woomycritiques543]

Honestly.

People cry and scream about people critiqueing HB or Hazbin for any reason whatsoever-

As if people were dogpilling a “real” person and they were “defending” them or feeling exhausted and sad that so many people are “unjustifyngly hateful” towards a real person by constantly sending bad faith criticism towards them-

When Hazbin and Helluva Boss characters….

ARE NOT REAL!

So if people want to say “Stolas is a bad person!” or “HB should have been written better” is that some “harassment you need to fight against!”?

No, because Stolas is NOT REAL!

He’s fictional, he’s a drawing with directions written by a person on a laptop! People are allowed to supposedly “dogpile” a cartoon show with fictional characters by pointing out plot issues to help themselves or other writers improve so they can try to write well-

Because that cartoon- is NOT A PERSON!

It’s a drawing on a piece of paper!

So do people need to go private as if they were wanting to dogpile a real person with insults and harassment? No, because in reality, those people are talking about not some human being they shouldn’t dogpile, but making a critique about FICTIONAL CHARACTERS!

It’s so fucking funny, because people will be saying mostly non-hateful critique while people in Hazbin or HB’s fandom will dogpile people with comments like “YOU NEVER DESERVED YOUR FOLLOWERS!” or “YOU’RE A [insert ableist comment here] or will be posting about how “criticism is bad don’t hawass my blorbos!”…. as a criticism post, towards the criticism… which is still criticism. Which makes said posts a complete waste of time, because it’s not even something important to talk about it’s just some random people disliking a cartoon clown! You really can just block and move on, hell, if anything causes you genuine distress- move on, dont harass people over material things such as “but I like this character!” or “it’s my favorite show!” or it just comes off as being selfish.

Being able to handle any different opinion at all is called being an adult. I swear these people wouldnt have been able to survive being one of the creators critiqued for the Sonic movie trailer.

-and you know what happened with that trailer?

People saw it. critiqued it. clowned on a fictional character, gave him redesigns: aka the exact thing the non-stans have been doing with Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss since day one!

-and instead of pitching a fit about these people being "HATERS!" to "GO WATCH SOMETHING ELSE!" or "GOOD WRITERS DONT CRITICIZE OTHER WRITERS OWO!" the creators accepted the criticism, and gave movie sonic a redesign! The sonic movie improved and became 100+ million dollar hit! In fact, the film got 100+ viewers and made even more money in it's sequel!

While Vivziepop is slowly losing large sums of money because she lets her fans harass people over SIMPLE criticism. Same for her accociated that do the same. -and though the softcore porn will still bring in viewers temporarily, eventually they get bored of it due to the badly written plot and lack of plot direction and world building... and move onto Pornhub. In 9 days, the last episode had over 13 million, while for this episode, it has only 8 million and got only 1 million in a 6+ hours while episode 3 got FIVE MILLION in about six hours!

While anyone who just wanted a plot moves on immediatly after seeing just ONE episode, which is why HB has been losing over 9 mil viewers since day ONE! It’s just now noticeable because season two is causing them to lose viewers even FASTER and the losses have now added up a TON! Over 30 mil!, so you know what harassing people over basic feedback does? It makes you lose respect-

-AND MONEY!

So you either be a decent human to your fans, or you lose a dime!

It’s not kindergarten where you can cry about a kid liking the blur crayon and not the one you have, and it still be acceptable behavior. You’re an adult, most of you are even nearing your thirties yet here you are, excusing transphobia, ableism, and using whether people like a cartoon or not to fuel your bigotry and use that as a chance to harass them, or sending dogpiling or death threats over any critique at all. You cant force someone to like something, that’s just being a hateful asshole, not a “positive and nice fan!” when you’re bashing your keyboard with dogpilling and slurs towards random people you’ve never even met before.

Saying critique out of good faith and love for a show or to help other writers doesn’t make you a “hater” for doing it. A “hater” is being-

HATEFUL!

-as in dogpiling, harassment through public slander, and threatening people, aka what the standom has been doing since day one:

Being a HATER!

#hazbin hotel #helluva boss #helluva boss criticism #hazbin hotel criticism #you're not kind you lose a dime!

[ilovethetalkingclock]

Love Bites

GENRE: Horror, Romance

CHARACTERS: Kevin and Streber (Spooky Month)

SHIP: Candybats (Kevin x Streber)

TW: Blood, trauma, hallucination, animal death

SUMMARY: Streber wants to watch over Kevin during his night off, but Kevin isn't so sure... will Streber be safe from the wolf?

SEQUEL TIME, BABY!!! Expect more stories like this!!!

"Pleeeeeaaaase?"

"No."

"Oh, come on! At least for one night?"

"No!!!"

"Kev, I'll try and-"

"Christ almighty, Streber, ever since what happened last year I really don't think anything's worth the risk! You already lost an arm, I don't want you to lose the rest of yourself!"

Streber looked at his prosthetic with the mention of that. As much as he hated to admit it, Kevin had a valid point for the most part. 

Streber had known about Kevin's secret ever since high school. Specifically, it was during the school dance event.

---

Kevin had asked Streber to join him, to which he gladly said yes. Of course, due to the year, they couldn't exactly consider each other dates by the school, but they were at heart.

That being said, Kevin realized that he was making a mistake when he felt mild cramping… just when he and Streber were about to secretly kiss.

Of course, Kevin did his best to do the deed before deciding to tell.

"I… I need to… tell something."

"Yes? What is it?"

"I'm… a… we… we…"

"Hmm?"

"I'm a were…"

"Ooh?"

"I'm aware that it's a bit early to leave butIHAVETOGOSORRY!!!!"

And just like that, Kevin was off.

Streber was… actually not that upset about it. For one, they got to kiss and that was neat.

Second of all, one look at the rising full moon combined with a passion for monster movies and he was quick to make a first guess.

He was more than elated to hear a confirmation when the newspaper came that morning with the reports of what was allegedly an "out-of-control malamute" wreaking havoc around the neighborhood.

Much to Kevin's own surprise, Streber was already at his door, eager to hear everything.

With initial reluctance, Kevin told that while the full moon transformations and blackouts were true, the idea of the silver bullets and the curse being contagious were inventions of cinema. 

What he also told was that the wolf was not a vicious monster, but rather merely just… well… a wolf. A creature that while dangerous when approached improperly, was still simply an animal running on instinct.

"...so have you considered letting yourself transform in the woods more?"

"...not sure. You know how many hunters do their thing there."

---

"...regardless… I know you would never hurt me on purpose."

Kevin felt his eyes water. Gah, why'd that have to hit deeper than it should?! 

"...fuck it. You can watch over me for tonight."

"Yes!!!" Streber immediately felt his spark come back.

"Just… if anything happens… run. Run for your life." 

It tugged Streber's heartstrings to hear, but if it was for Kevin so be it.

---

Kevin awoke to the taste of blood… and the feeling of the wind's breeze. 

What nearly stopped his heart was that underneath him he felt not the cellar floor, but rather the feeling of grass and leaves.

Opening his eyes, he was nigh-blinded by the light of the daylight sky. He looked down to see his nude body splattered with the crimson juices.

"No… NONONONONO… NO!!!"

Immediately, he wandered through the woods in a tearful frantic huff, calling for his lover desperately.

"STREBER?!"

He ventured further, hoping that Streber would not only be still alive, but also the only one to see him naked.

What stopped him in his tracks was Streber's body. The prosthetic was gone, and there was blood coming right from the nub, as if he'd regrown his old arm only for it to be torn off again.

When Kevin blinked tears out, he saw that the still-fresh corpse was torn open with claw marks and bite wounds combined.

Just when Kevin closed his eyes to wail, he heard a voice.

"Kev!!!"

When his eyes opened the body was gone.

He turned to see Streber right behind him, completely unharmed.

Immediately, Kevin embraced him, his tears and snot dampening Streber's shirt. 

The only time Kevin had cried like this was when he realized the incident of last Halloween, and Streber knew. 

Immediately, Streber held him right back, not giving a fuck that his shirt was getting wet with saltwater, mucus, and blood.

After a while Kevin stopped crying and let go, his tears having given way to frustration.

"Streber, what the FUCK did you do?!"

Streber gave a nervous smile.

"Uhhhh… Iiiiiiii may have let you out into the woods??? I followed you and did my best to make sure you were safe!!!"

"Streber, I could have KILLED you."

"But ya didn't!"

Kevin calmed a bit.

"...not even try to?"

"Nope! You snarled at me when you first saw me but just a hold of my hand right in front of your muzzle, you gave a little sniff and we were all good!"

"...huh…"

"Yep!!!"

That alleviated Kevin's fears… but there was still something in his mind.

"This… this is fresher than what's in the minifridge. If I didn't kill you what did I kill?!"

"Oh, that's easy!"

Streber walked Kevin up to a bloodied deer carcass, throat torn out along with its insides and half of the skin gone.

"...ah. I see now."

---

Kevin used a nearby river to wash away the red. It was able to do a good job in making it look like nothing happened.

When he was done, Streber gave out his cape to both dry Kevin and cover him up.

"Do you have to carry this with you everywhere?"

"Why not?"

Couldn't argue with that logic. At least it helped here.

The two walked back to Kevin's house out of the forest and through the neighborhood backyards.

"Soooooo…"

"Hmm?" 

"With this in mind, can I watch you again next month?"

"As much as I want to say no… eh why not?"

"Yay!!!!!!"

The way Streber squealed warmed Kevin's heart. 

"I have a couple hours before work. You can stay in my house until the time comes."

"...can I give you a bunch of headpats first thing?"

Kevin gave Streber an unamused look.

"Sorry, I-"

The face became a smile, which prompted Streber to make one too.

"Obviously."

#spooky month #spooky month kevin #spooky month streber #fanfic #woofkev au #tw animal death #tw blood #candybats #kevin x streber #ship #shipfic #werewolf!kevin #werewolf #lycanthropy

[thompsborn]

Hello!!! i’m so interested in the HB2 plot! I feel like we see peter angst way more commonly than Harley—so if you ever feel up for rambling about it under a cut or a spoiler tag this is a free space to do so! He really is my blorbo and you’re my favorite fic writer so I know whatever happens it’ll be amazingly done but I’m dying for hints at more of what that’ll look like! Are we talking, like, caught in the literal crossfire or devastating hostage situation 😂

okay before i do the harley rambles i!? I’m your favorite fic writer??? my guy what the FUCK that’s so sweet but also have u read any of sarah’s fics?? oddy’s parkner fic or oddy’s parksborn fic??? ANY of the Classic Iconic parkner fics circa 2020-2021?

i’m actually very VERY slowly making a parkner fic rec list to post at some point but just. WHAT. there are So many INCREDIBLE fic writers and saying i’m your favorite is BONKERS to me but also so nice i ??? thank you??? oh my god???? ❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙

okay anyway sorry to what the ask was actually about pfkfj, HARLEY!!! i agree it’s definitely a lot easier to come across peter angst than harley angst, which most likely has to do with the fact that there is a LOT of material to draw from for peter’s character—various movies, comics, shows, timelines and universes and the games. it’s a lot easier to come up with angst for peter because there’s a lot of canon angst to choose from AND there’s so much content for him that it’s a lot easier to get a grasp on his character and create angst based on that, you know? but as a fandom we have definitely created many ideas of harley based on when he was a kid in im3 and his cameo in endgame, plus the WEB comics + ride at avengers campus, so harley angst is for sure out there but like you said it is NOT easy to come across lmao

as for the HB2 plot—i have an ask in my drafts from like a month or two ago asking for more information about hb2 and i’m gonna try to finally finish answering that and post it sometime today, so that post will definitely include some insight in what to expect from the sequel, but harley in hb2 specifically? i GOTCHU.

OKAY !!! let's do this!!

so homeward bound, as i've said before, is PETER'S story post no way home, right? but in hb2 it's peter AND HARLEY'S story post homeward bound. the first chapter is a recap of the first fic from harley's pov with a lot of extra bits thrown in, starting on the day that thanos first snapped and ending either where the first fic ends or maybe in the summer between school years. unsure as of now but one of those, for sure. so that's going to offer a lot of perspective about harley's character in homeward bound - his thought processes, how he was feeling in a lot of key moments during the first fic, things he was doing while peter wasn't around, etc etc etc.

but in hb2, after the recap in the first fic, it picks up at the start of their second year at ESU. he might still be roommates with harry. he might not be. it won't be the same room at the very least, so no matter what, there's going to be some changes, right? but also:

everything is different.

there are the small changes - not the same room, harder classes as they climb their way through the pre-reqs, potentially a different roommate, some stuff happened over summer, etc.

but also there are the BIG changes, like his dynamic with peter, and knowing that peter is spidey and now being a part of keeping that a secret due to peter not wanting anyone else to know. he also knows about the spell and he knows that peter is someone tony loved, someone that pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey knew and cared about, and none of them remember him, but they know harley.

with harley's pov comes the reintroduction of the rest of the world, basically. peter has no one, right? his old life was completely destroyed and erased, leaving no connections to the people he used to know, so he's been VERY closed off from everyone and everything.

harley, however, still knows pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey. he still talks to them on a regular basis. he has his mom and his sister. he isn't closed off in classes like peter is, actually having conversations with his classmates, even if he has no interest in befriending them. peter's pov has been very limited because his world has been completely changed. harley's has been changed too via the loss of tony and him being dead for five years while his mom and his sister had to adapt to a life without him there, but it's not been changed to the extent of peter's, you know?

harley is going to have a few struggles in hb2, some centered around peter, some not. there's going to be family stuff. there's going to be this urge to tell pepper and them about peter because he thinks that peter would benefit from having these people in his life again but also he wants to respect the fact that peter doesn't feel ready to do that.

there's going to be some conflict about the people in his life learning that he's involved with spider-man's business somehow. there's going to be people getting angry at spider-man because of it.

a lot of mental and emotional turmoil is going to come out of all this. but, in the physical sense, he's not going to be entirely safe, either. again, people are going to realize he's somehow connected to spidey. he's going to want to do whatever he can do to help peter, to the point where he's going to get a little reckless with it sometimes.

caught in the crossfire? yeah.

hostage situation? no. at least, not in hb2. not that i currently have planned. that could change, but as of my current plans, no.

hope that's enough information to build some intrigue >:)

#homeward bound fic #homeward bound fic spoilers

[wreckham]

Personally, I think TLK 2 is very....unfinished feeling? Like..the first movie needs absolutely nothing added to it imo, but TLK 2 shouldn't have scrapped so much. Watching the workprint feels like a robbery of what could have been. The Disney sequels are already a rough topic of conversation because everyone's got a favorite one they cling onto so rabidly without an inch of hesitation, so you can't call one good and one bad without offending someone's childhood.

Anyway. You're right. Difficult movie to rate and discuss without accidentally starting a war due to how it's both good and bad, and someone's always gonna defend it. Final thoughts? No matter what, the Disney Sequels will always be better than the live action remakes.

i'll admit i was mostly memeing in that post, buuut emphasis on "mostly" lol. i always have Needlessly Earnest lion movie opinions

that's basically how i feel. the more info we in the fanbase collect regarding the making of tlk2, the more it becomes obvious (at least imo) that the movie woulda been better had more resources and time been put into it. like, one of the major plot points - kovu being scar's heir - is just a vestigial remnant of the Uh Oh! We Almost Pulled An Incest! issue disney took too long to notice, and i firmly think it could've been ironed out more believably if the xmas deadline wasn't strangling the crew the whole time

its nearly as frustrating as the cutting of stuff like the outlanders getting actual character development or zira refusing the enemy's help because some people make themselves beyond saving. and yet there's enough charm to the film that it's difficult to give an honest take on it w/o anyone misinterpreting your opinion of it. its one of my fave movies and ppl still think i hate it (which i do but i also don't; if you know, you know)

but yeah, tlk2 can't be talked about basically ever bc it has so many ppl on either side who make strong points while also being loudly, proudly immovable in their stances. which is fine! bc who the fuck cares if you wanna die on the hill that tlk2 is better then tlk1 or whateva! just god good lord in heaven please don't make me think about beyonce nala ever again!!!

#the lion king #the lion king 2 #disney #tlk #asks #beck yammers #miss-bvnny coming in hot once again <3

[variousqueerthings]

I'm watching the craft: legacy and I think it's much more watchable than its reputation. it's messy as hell, and I am not convinced teenagers speak like this at all, but I think it's got some interesting bones. it's main problems I think are the pacing and lack of purpose for most of the characters -- the more interesting stuff doesn't really begin until around the one hour mark, when there's not much movie left, and it sort of races towards the finish line from that point, rather than letting things build slowly

it's especially the three other witches that suffer from this, they're simply not particularly well drawn. that being said the idea that these four girls reach into this boy (an awful person, definitely) and completely fuck with his brain in order to make him "better" is very interesting, although those consequences aren't really dealt with, because he's murdered, kind of letting them off the hook

there are all these interesting little ideas floating about that unfortunately get lost in the more simplistic evil david duchovny plot (which, to be clear, totally fair to have evil david duchovny who hates women plot also)

I have now seen a few modern takes on different kinds of horror and soft!horror and I wonder if the wall that keeps getting banged against is the fear of having main characters be "problematic." the idea that we're trying to create a different kind of world, centering narratives that have queer intersectional ethos, and so we can't let the characters be messy, or else that underlying messaging might get lost/people might judge

this to say, that especially in horror, people need to let their inner freak out more. not police what's "morally good" behaviour. not let limitations be dictated by narratives that have demonised marginalised bodies in the past. idk, just write a short with some mass-murdering witches to get it out of your system and see how you feel after that, maybe you'd like more murderous witches

also, spoiler I guess for the final scene which doesn't have any bearing really on the main plot + mild discussion of SA

but perhaps my bias around nancy downs... there is something incredibly bleak about her specifically having a kid that she's forced to give up under very unclear circumstances. if it were sarah (robin tunney) I'd have maybe read some of that differently, but I cannot not read this as somehow related to sexual assault or at least highly dubious consent, because nancy ends the original craft institutionalised and we see her here... still institutionalised. there is a line that suggests that in between that she's been released and came to lily's adopted mother for help (which is also... skirted over....) but nancy's relationship with men isn't canonically great for her, so to see her here... many questions....

I think maybe also because I read nancy as a lesbian, so it's all very mixed up in personal feelings about the character, but of course none of that is explored because it's the last scene sooo

I think a sequel might actually do this a lot of good, because it sets up way more than it explores, but I don't think it will due to ahem... very bad ratings

#im watching movies #im watching the craft: legacy

[via-the-ghoul]

Ok this would not save the movie at all but I am extremely fucking mad that they didn’t go with the original plan of Pluto the dog being the villain of the Rescue Rangers movie. Like, there’s so many reasons it would have been better than what they actually went with:

Pluto actually has a fucking connection to the Rangers. Peter Pan… doesn’t, he’s basically just some random Disney character that they dragged into this to spit on Bobby Driscoll’s grave

Look, we all know how… questionable the backstory Peter Pan has was, the fact that it was based on the really tragedy of Bobby Driscoll

Also, ignoring the parallels with the fate of his voice actor, Peter Pan backstory just ignores the Direct to DVD sequel, Jake and the Neverland Pirates, the whole Disney Infinity thing (the game was discontinued before he was finished, but the fans voted him in. This is just a piece of evidence that we still care about this character.)

The reason Pluto had for being evil was that he was tired of all the crap Chip and Dale put him through. Actually works.

His name is Pluto. That is the name of the Roman God of the Underworld. Do the math. (Technically he was called Mean Dean in the 4Chan leak but)

He actually has a reason to keep the character parts (that sounds so bad out of context) considering his main motivation was to become the Ultimate Cartoon with the weird bootleg thing being a side-gig

They definitely also would’ve given him a weird human voice. This stands out more than with the other characters, since Pluto didn’t originally talk. This would’ve made him the main meme made out of this movie, instead of the whole “Ugly Sonic” thing that actually happened,

Honestly I could make a whole list of characters that would’ve been better villains, Pluto just gets his own post due to being the original plan.

#you know it’s bad when me #someone who’s never seen the og Rescue Ranger cartoon #has better ideas than the actual movie #via #via rambles #chip and dale #chip and dale rescue rangers #pluto the dog #disney #anti disney #Peter pan

[sereiaxz]

My thoughts on Jade Dynasty

This could contain spoilers.

The movie is not that bad, but not great.

So I finished watching Jade Dynasty and omg... So many thoughts. It lasts 1:40:54 and wow, that ending saved almost the whole movie, because I'm gonna be honest, it felt during everything like a silly little cheap comedy movie I couldn't take it seriously but I wanted to keep on watching obviously for Xiao Zhan.

What made it kinda bad was the plot being treated poorly, and for a movie that its reaching two hours, in two hours it could have gone fantastic but the story/plot was made, developed very lazy, no flavor at all. I give points due to the ending because it did took a whole interesting point that I loved it, if they make a sequel, I will watch bc that cliffhanging was really well done, and sadly the whole movie didn't had that greatness of the last 30 minutes.

Now I'm going into my actress mode, the special effects deserve a lot of praise, I think they were really well done and had that mystical beauty that made it visually stunning, the waters, the flying swords made me want to fly, the skies and the clouds, it was very pretty and HAD the EFFORT , the general scenery of nature was also really nice and pleasant, the structure of the sanctuaries and this whole thing that screamed that everything was big and colossal left me wowed lol, I think all of this held well the movie.

Onto the characters and the relationships, my main focus was Xiao Zhan character, poor kitten Zhang Xiaofan deserves better and I hope he gets it! He was portrayed as a silly little guy with no tast, lets please not forget who he truly is; a good person, someone who is kind, respectful and helpful, and that was what made others walk over him, because his shufu instead of instructing him with the other guys, kept him as some kind househusband that had to do the fucking chores, they didn't help him with anything, didn't gave him in 10 years good clothes, literally slept with his dog and monkey in the place/kitchen/wherever they kept the food, 10 damn years he wasn't teached once how to fly, get his own sword and all the other things he didnt got like the others. Even the Qingyun Sect dared to "punish whoever does KungFu outside of the classes" Zhang Xiaofan HAD to do what he could because he wasn't given the option, so he had to MADE IT himself. The man was BULLIED by his peers, his brother didn't do enough for him either way. The only one who truly saw him and kinda recognized him was Biyao, and even if she mocked him, she held some respect for him alongside Tian Ling Er, but at the end what undone him, was that people didnt took him seriously, and he somehow had that accumulated in his heart. And its that what will change him from the sweet guy he was. He wasnt respected nor being truly considered.

I hope to see more regarding his relationship with the three main girls and how it develops, his "friends" and brother. I would love for Zhang Xiaofan to be respected and recognized, maybe as a supposed future villain, because being the joke of the others he was for too long, and my god, my heart ached when he could fly for the first time, sweet baby💔

#jade dynasty #zhang xiaofan #xiao zhan

[writingrose29]

Two Birds (1/?)

Pairings: Steven Grant x fem!Reader, Marc Spector x  fem!Reader, Jake Lockley x  fem!Reader (Slow Burn, Post-Moon Knight)

Summary: Her life was a continuous cycle of good and bad things. Anytime things were good she knew for a fact some shitstorm was going to hit her. However, she never could've predicted the mess her adoptive father's death would bring.

AN: Welcome to the official sequel to "Strangers", now in the reader's POV. I just wanted to give you all the heads up that I have written up to Ch 3 and I will most likely be updating there first followed by tumblr. This story will contain dark themes (such as suicide, self harm, experimentation, etc) and I will be placing TW on each chapter when appropriate. I will also note that reader goes by Alessandra, due to the fact she doesn’t remember her birth name. If you want to know the full tag list, including characters, you can see it here on Ao3

Word Count: 4419

TW/CW: references to substance abuse as unhealthy coping mechanism, implied suicide attempt, and reference/implied past child abuse

Ao3

Prequel: Strangers

Summary: Sometimes the best person to talk to is the one that you will never meet again  

Two Birds Masterlist

Next Chapter

Essex Corporation

Those two words seemed to be taunting her with every list she went through. Funding this and that, from Military Operations to Mutant Re-Education Centers to even Archaeological Excavations. Thousands of different companies, corporations, and the occasional individual name with only one thing in common.

Essex

No matter how many times the money got transferred, in the end it all trailed back to that one corporation or one of their children corporations.

She wasn't sure why Erik gave all this to her, she wasn't his secretary. Shit she wasn't really that involved with ninety percent of the shit he did. Though it was most likely his pride prevented him from bringing it straight to Xavier. Typical, just like two divorce parents.

Alessandra thought about asking him how he even got his hands on this dossier, but ultimately decided to have some type of defense of ignorance. Though, if he had it and if he wanted her to do some digging on it, well that just meant something bad was happening.

She glanced away from the files to the stack of ungraded class work that rested on the other side of her coffee table and groaned, leaning back in her office chair. She should bribe X to let her have a TA.

Alessandra rubbed her eyes, going through several more lists of names. After all, she wants to see if she can find something she recognizes in these lists before her appointment with Hank.

The words slowly blending into gibberish the longer she scanned over them. Until one name in particular.

$3 million to Percival Beaumont

She pursed her lips, tapping the paper. Sadly all of this information was useless, just showing where the money was heading too and nothing else.

Why was Beaumont getting money? Fuck how long was he?

She went to keep checking before going back through the previous files. To see if she had missed anything important but she paused as her phone started vibrating.

A loud sigh escaped her lips as she grabbed the phone, unlocking it to only reveal a simple text.

Ollie: BBC 4 News

Ollie: Now

Alessandra frowned slightly, clicking her phone off and turned the TV on. Lifetime started blasting one of their murderous ex girlfriend movies before she quickly switched the channel.

The news headline caused her to freeze in her seat: One of the World's Greatest Philanthropist, Scientist, and Inventor Found Dead at 68

"In the early morning of November 5th, Sir Percival Arthur Beaumont. Was found deceased in his countryside manor in Chilterns, England. He was found by his employee who was the one who reported his death to the police. It is being reported that Sir Percival passed away in his sleep due to an apparent heart attack. Today the world mourns another magnificent life gone too-"

She turned off the TV, allowing the silence to permeate the air. An odd numbness fell over her as she stared blankly at the dark screen of the TV.

Her eyes went back to the list that held his name before a short laugh escaped her lips as the news truly started to sink in.

He was dead. The fucking bastard was actually dead.

A scoffed escaped her lips as she stalked to her liquor cabinet, ignoring the now constant flickering of lights and pulled out  her Remy Martin Louis XIII, the very bottle she was saving for this exact occasion.

She took a large swig of it, sighing as the liquid burned her throat and warmed her stomach. Probably shouldn't be drinking before class, but it wasn't like she could get drunk and if any situation called for a drink it would be this.

She did promise herself a celebration after all.

She slammed her hand against the kitchen counter, a laugh bubbling out of her mouth as tears streamed down her face.

It wasn't long for her to feel the slight tingling in her eyes, one that always felt like her eyes themselves were burning. Quickly Alessandra closed them, she didn't need that vision to turn on right now, she really didn't.

This moment, this very event was something she had been dreaming for her entire life. To see that evil waste of a person fucking die. She should be out making a reservation at her favorite steakhouse in celebration. She should be feeling joy, relief yet she just felt nothing. Endless numbness.

How pathetic, she wished for his death for years and now all she wanted was for him to come back so she could yell, scream, give him a piece of her mind for everything he did to her, to them.

And now she can't. He didn't even die in pain, he would never feel the pain he put her through, put all of them through.

Alessandra wasn't sure whether to laugh, cry, or scream. So she did all three.

She also wasn't sure when she threw the bottle of liquor, whether it was before or after the lights in her apartment shattered leaving the entire room in darkness.

You could've let me have a drink before you destroyed it

She glanced up. Through blurred vision she saw the familiar stout robotic figure of her brother.

When did she decide to sit on the cold kitchen tiles?

She sniffled, a choked laugh escaping her throat. "With what mouth and body dipshit?"

Her brother, and freeloading roommate who was stuck with her as she was the only one able to translate his bio-electrochemical signals, stood above her, a machine controlled by a consciousness stuck within an metal brain that rested in the 'chest' of the machine. The family's own robot Mike Wazowski. He held out his robotic claw, helping her up as the pixelated face on the screen merely rolled their eyes at her.

I thought you be celebrating

She rubbed some of the tears away and sniffled. "Yeah, so did I." Alessandra took in several deep breaths, shaking her head as to rid herself of any feelings involving that news.

Suck it up. All she had to do was suck it up.

Didn't expect it to be a heart attack

She snorted, "Didn't know he was human enough to die."

Did you really have to destroy a $3000 bottle?

Alessandra rolled her eyes, sniffling once more as she shook her finger at him. "This is why you don't get a voice box. Nag nag nag."

She waved her hands, the lights and bottle were fixed as if they had never been touched in the first place.

Did you know about his move to London?

Alessandra merely shook her head, "My goal was to avoid thinking about him," she glanced back at the files that rested on the table, "It was fun while it lasted."

Lou shifted his body, the screen that made his face now facing the files.

…What are those?

"...Papers?"

He shuffled closer, picking up one of the pages with his clamp-like hand.

I thought you stopped contact with Lehnsherr.

"Who said Lehnsherr was involved? Implying I can't do…accounting?"

Slowly he turned to face her. Three thin lines on his screen.

You can't even figure out how to do taxes. Why would you be handling dossier maintenance?

Alessandra opened her mouth before closing it. Instead she merely grabbed the files and her phone from the table before ripping the sheet from his grasp.

Al, what happened to no more terrorism?

"Okay one, this is merely research. And two, I have no knowledge of how this information was obtained and I have no involvement in said matter so not sure where the big T word is coming from."

Anything involving Le-

"Okay, love you and all, but maybe start questioning why Congress is debating whether mutants are considered human or not under the Constitution, instead of bitching about my quote on quote terrorism?" She slipped the files into her backpack then shrugged the backpack on her shoulder.

A simple question mark appeared on the screen.

That is not relevant to this-

"Or is it?" She glanced at her empty wrist, "Oh look at the time, McCoy is waiting for me gotta go. Uh, keep your…attention on the news or something."

She closed the door before he could respond.

As she stood in the hallway, she released a deep breath. Shove the emotions inside and lock them away.

Alessandra was the queen of healthy coping mechanisms.

Sometimes lying to yourself brought peace, if just for a fleeting moment

There were many pros and cons to living in New York City. Such pros being many options for public transportation, a lot of restaurants, Broadway, and how it kept her mind busy. She hated being stuck in her mind, nothing good came from it. The cons being stupidly expensive, NYPD, the Avengers (super cops), stupid insurance plans (she continues to count her blessing that the Hulk never threw a car through her apartment yet, that plan was too expensive) and the fact that it kept her mind busy. Especially in moments like this where all she wanted was to enjoy her bus ride to her other bus ride to Westchester county but everything was so loud. Every bioelectric activity, radio, tv, computer clouding her mind resulting in a pulsating migraine.

Fuck, she knew she should've taken the shot beforehand. While the doses were growing more and more ineffective, it would've given her some respite.

Alessandra rubbed her eyes behind her glasses, taking deep breaths just like how Erik told her. Imagine something calming, something to drown everything out.

Like the sound of a waterfall.

Like the one she shoved Allen off of when they were 15 and sent to Chile.

At least she managed to get her sight back to normal. She didn't need a visual overload as well.

When she opened them, she was pleased to see no one staring at her. At least New Yorkers minded their damn business, a trait she had found a lot of respect in during her time living here.

It was then she realized her thoughts were now just her own. A relieved sigh escaped her lips. When she was positive that a relapse wasn't coming, she pulled out her phone quickly searching for her boss's contact.

With a deep breath she pressed the green and white phone icon. Alessandra rested her head on the window, listening to the phone ring.

"Hey Alessandra, everything alright?" Alessandra always had a soft spot for her boss, Dr. Janssens. She was one of those people who were just kind, something that was not too common in Alessandra's life. Even her thoughts were gentle, either worrying about work or fondly thinking of her daughter and grandchildren.

"Hey Annette," Alessandra kept her voice soft and had it wavered slightly, "Not really."

"Oh, what happened?" Her concern was evident in every word she spoke.

"My father," she paused, "He uh…he passed away today and," she added a sigh, "everything is just a mess. You have my siblings, and the funeral, and…" Alessandra trailed off, making sure she added the right amount of panic and grief in her words. She had to sell this correctly, hook and line.

"Oh my, I am so sorry for your loss. I know how difficult it can be to lose a father."

Alessandra let out a sniffled, "Yeah, it just hurts so much," she choked out, "It was just so sudden." Well, her words weren't completely false, it was sudden. "I just…I don't know when I will be able to come back in with all this. Especially since it is out of the country."

Dr. Janssens hummed, "I completely understand. How about this, you can just keep me updated on when you think you will be back alright? I don't want to add even more stress on you."

And sinker.

"Oh thank you so much. I truly appreciate it." The honest words flowed easily from her lips, as easy as her previous lies.

"Of course Alessandra. Take care alright."

"I will, thank you."

She exited with a small smile, sending a quick text to Hank to let him know that she would be arriving slightly earlier than expected.

Alessandra always liked kind people, they were far easier to manipulate.

She rested her eyes, smiling as the sunlight brought a sense of warmth to her skin.

It took about two hours for her to end up on the shuttle that brought her to the X Mansion. After exchanging pleasantries with the driver, it was a quiet ride with her being the lone passenger. It made sense, considering it was a school week so it wouldn't make sense for any students to be shuttling anywhere away from the school. The fact it was still during school hours removed the presence of any other professors arriving or leaving the grounds.

Alessandra felt her heart lighten slightly when the large mansion came into view. She wasn't sure when this place started to feel like a safe haven for her, only that she realized it when it was far too late to back away. The students and her colleagues latched onto her heart, allowing her to have a soft fondness over them despite any irritation they caused her. Not that she would let them know that. Then again, she was sure that some of them already knew. Pesky telepaths and empaths.

"Thanks for the ride Robbie." She sent him a smile which he returned.

"It's no problem Andy. Imma guess you'll need a ride back?"

"You know me so well."

He waved at her, "Until then," he said as he closed the doors behind her. She sent him a short wave and started making her way up the path.

The foregrounds were empty, yet as she peered through some of the opened windows she could see filled classes of students of varying ages and appearance. Alessandra always felt some pity for those whose mutations were physical, she was lucky that she could bullshit her way into seeming human without too much difficulty.

She waved at several students who met her glance, only recognizing one of them as one of her students. Andrew she believed his name was. He was a kind boy, three eyes and with the nifty ability to spit out corrosive acid and stick to walls.

The mansion was mostly silent when she entered, only a couple students scattered around the hallway, some going up or down the stairs to their next class or to their rooms.

Alessandra gave everyone who glanced at her a polite nod as she made her way to Hank's lab.

It was impossible to miss him, especially in his very sterile lab.  The curse of being very large, very blue, and very furry.

She knocked on one of the metal tables, catching his attention away from one of his many computers.

"Hey Doc," she waved at him. Hank glanced down at her, his typical stern and no-nonsense expression resting on his face before cracking a small smile.

"Alessandra, I heard about your father. I'm sorry-"

She shook her head, "Don't be, he was a piece of shit." She walked past him, sitting in one of his spare office chairs with her feet resting on one of the arm rests. "So what's up? My next doses are in?"

Hank let out a sigh as he took the seat across from her. Alessandra frowned at his reaction.

Well that can't be good.

"My doses are in right? I'm almost out."

"When was the last time you took a dose?" He asked instead.

"Yesterday, I got sidetracked today. Why?"

"And how are you feeling?"

Alessandra sighed, sitting upright in her seat and leaned forward. "Annoyed that you are being evasive. C'mon what the fuck is going on?"

Hank rolled his chair to his desk, picking up a folder before rolling himself back to her.

"Alessandra, you know how long I've been studying your blood work right?"

She nodded slowly.

He opened up the folder, showing her the results from the past several months.

"Here is the baseline." He handed her a page. "The bloodwork for the first time you taken the doses." Another sheet. "The first time you were off the doses." Another sheet. "And the rest are every time since, off and on, up until your most recent blood work." He handed her the rest of the file.

Alessandra glanced through each one, glancing at the raising and lowering numbers.

"At first it looks like a success, yeah? Complete suppression of the mutation."

Alessandra nodded, "Yeah, but there is something off with the numbers on the other sheet?"

Hank nodded, a grim look on his furry face. "From what I can tell, it seems that your mutation is constantly fighting off the medication. Which in turn is causing the new doses of the medication to suppress normal organ and hormone function in an attempt to suppress the mutation which in turn is causing your mutation to attack those same functions as a result. A constant cycle."

Alessandra scoffed, "I wasn't aware that was in the realm of electromagnetism."

"On the subatomic level it can be," he pointed out.

She sighed, closing the file and handing it back to him. "So that's why it is growing less effective."

Hank nodded, "And it's why you see a surge of instability afterwards. Your mutation is working hard against it, the moment it is out of your system it is way above normal activity."

"Okay," she sighed, "So how do we adjust the cure?"

"We don't. It is a failure and far too dangerous for consumption."

"Hank," she shook her head, "Hank I need this cure to work. I…I can't keep fucking living like this."

His eyes were hard, yet carried a hint of sympathy.

"Alessandra," he said softly, "If you keep taking this drug it will not end up well for you or for anyone in your vicinity." He placed one of his large hands on her lap. "Listen to me okay, I'm telling you this because I care about you and I don't want you to get worse. If you continue taking this drug you will die."

Alessandra scoffed, a harsh laugh escaping her lips. "You and I both know that's bullshit."

Hank winced, "Fine, maybe not actual death but something far closer to it."

She threw him a confused look as he rubbed his face once again.

"Remember what you told me about the Chicago incident, with the man you suspect had DID?"

Alessandra nodded, a small smile appearing on her lips as she thought of the kind man from the park. His soft, expressive eyes, the soothing presence he brought that eased the pain she felt that day, his odd mind which held two oddities she couldn't place that stood out amongst the crowd of people. "The Brit."

"You mentioned throwing up blood followed by the inability to smell, taste, and feel touch hours afterwards."

She bit her lip, wincing at the memory.

"Then the incident you and Wilson got into a month later. Total vision loss for a week."

"Okay, so what you're saying is I'll become a walking nuke with temporary sensory deprivation."

Hank shook his head, "I'm saying that you'll become a walking nuke with permanent sensory deprivation. No sight, smell, taste, touch. Permanently. With the addition to having your mutation on overload and actively on the defense. It may be able to repair the damage now, but I refuse to see how far we can push it."

Alessandra felt herself freeze, his words stuck in her head. Permanent deprivation.

She cried out, clawing against his wrist as he tightened his grip on her underarm. She tried to shove herself backwards yet he continued to drag her along as if she was a ragdoll.

"Please, I'm sorry. I'll do better. I'll be better. Just don't leave me there again." The cold metal collar rubbed against her neck with each movement she made.

Her father-Mr. Beaumont said nothing, he just continued to drag her through the depths of the basement until they arrived at that room.

She watched with tear filled eyes as he slowly unlocked the door before turning the hatch to open the door.

He looked down at her, his cold beady eyes looking at her blankly. No emotions, just two pair of coals staring back into her. As dark as the room she was being forced into once again.

"Four hours shall do," was all he said before tossing her inside.

Into Oblivion she became nothing.

"-ndra!"

She came back to see Hank in front of her, his eyes wide with worry as he held her shoulders.

When did she start breathing so harshly?

"Uh sorry," she cleared her throat as she relaxed her grip on her thighs, "Zoned out for a moment. What were you saying."

The look of worry and concern did not leave his face but he relented either way. "I was merely saying you should give yourself more credit. The fact you didn't turn that man's brain into mush and that Chicago is still intact is a miracle."

"Okay, I got your message loud and clear. No more drugs."

Hank nodded his head, a triumph smile on his face. "Which is why you will be returning the remaining doses to me."

Alessandra sighed and nodded in agreement.

"And you will keep me updated with any symptoms of withdrawal and side-effects?"

"Yes yes yes, I'm not a child you know."

Hank stood up and patted her shoulder, "I know. Now let me take one more blood sample and you can head to Charles.

Alessandra quickly turned to look at his retreating back. "Xavier wants to talk to me?"

Hank nodded as he brought his supplies to her. Alessandra quickly rolled up her sleeve for him as he sat back down in his chair.

"Did I forget the pass on that message?"

Alessandra narrowed her eyes at him, not missing the smile he had.

"Conspirator," she muttered, scrunching her nose quickly as she felt the needle pierce her skin.

She made sure to take her time going to Xavier's office. Making small talk to Ororo on her way there.

However, she couldn't delay it forever. Especially when he was waiting for her.

Exhaling deeply, she knocked on his door. Only opening it when she heard him say "Come in."

His office was the same. Everything neat, filled with books on the bookshelf on the side. Charles Xavier was facing his tall window, staring outside with a thoughtful expression.

She closed the door behind her, the noise catching his attention. He smiled warmly at her, his light blue eyes warmed.

"My condolences for your loss Alessandra. I know you must have conflicted feelings given…" Xavier trailed off, rolling his wheelchair towards her.

She scoffed, shaking her head. "Okay, first of all you're not my therapist so just don't. Two, cut it out with that 'I know how you must feel' bullshit. You don't. Just because you can take glimpses of it in my mind doesn't mean you understand shit. You didn't live it, I did. You can never understand so cut it out. And three, let's cut the bullshit yeah? You want to talk about Erik I'm guessing."

He sighed, rolling behind his desk. "Indeed. How is my old friend."

Alessandra rolled her eyes, taking a seat in front of his desk. "He's fine, I think he misses the chess games with you. Can't you two just make up already?"

Xavier gave her his standard look, one of parental warning.

Typical divorce dads.

"He found some information dealing with the Essex Corporation." Alessandra unzipped her backpack, shoving the files on his desk, "I will do more research on it but something does seem off."

Xavier frowned, "Never heard of them," he said softly as he started scanning through the lists. "Your adoptive father-"

"Is listed there, yeah I know," Alessandra bit her lip, "Funny timing."

Xavier sighed once more, "I will not try to dissuade you from investigating this matter," he said finally as he handed the files back to her, "All I ask is for you to use caution and to inform me of anything important"

Alessandra blinked in surprise but nodded, placing the files back inside her backpack.

"Will do. It would be nice if you and Erik can cooperate though."

"We shall see. I have missed him."

Alessandra hummed, tapping her fingers on his desk.

"Can I ask you for two favors?"

Xavier raised an eyebrow, but stayed silent.

"Can you get me a train ticket to Philly and a plane ticket to London. And could you possibly put some mental blocks up, limit me to bioelectric and biomagnetic instead of," she waved her hands.

"Any reason for Philadelphia?"

She shrugged, "Old bastard is dead now, might as well say goodbye to the old stomping ground."

Xavier merely gave her a skeptical look but nodded his head anyways. "As you wish."

He rolled towards her, placing two fingers on her temple. A pressure she didn't even notice lifted.

"Thank you," Alessandra meant every word.

"Of course my dear," he gave her a smile. A smile that almost made her feel guilty for snapping at him. "They will come undone if you are in any serious danger, do remember that," he warned gently.

She nodded her head, standing up from her seat.

"Logan can cover my teaching shifts while I'm gone. The man is basically a walking relic so he should be fine."

Xavier let out a small laugh, "I'll keep that in mind."

She could've sworn she saw his eye twinkle.

"Also, I'll have Wade deliver the student essays to you."

Xavier winced, "Must you?"

Alessandra shrugged, "Anything to keep him busy. Plus, he loves you guys."

She was almost out the door when Xavier's voice made her stop in her tracks.

"I know that I will never understand the pain you went through my child and I'm sorry I am unable to alleviate the burdens of your past. But if you ever need to talk, we are here for you. Every single one of us."

Alessandra turned towards him slightly, one foot out the door. "I-" she paused, unsure what to say. Unsure whether to snap back or to remain silent.

"Thank you," she whispered as she left his office. She made her way down the stairs, his words still playing in her mind as she called Wade Wilson to inform him of the new jobs she had for him.

#steven grant x reader #steven grant x you #steven grant/reader #steven grant/you #steven grant/fem!reader #marc spector x reader #marc spector/reader #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley/reader #marc spector x you #marc spector x fem!reader #jake lockley x fem!reader #jake lockley x you #moon knight x reader #moon knight fanfiction

[geekgemsspooksandtoons]

Some thoughts on Friday the 13th 2009

Guess that title will do or so. I was joking with @lovezdarestevez4ever about something and got distracted from not making this. This isn’t really a review. But some points from me on how I feel about the film.

I don’t really hate the 2009 reimagining of the series. And that’s due to a couple of reasons.

1. It’s literally the same as the earlier films. Compared to something like Halloween 2007 or Elm Street 2010, I don’t know. It’s more like the fact it feels like it’s part of the same series despite some things that separate it. It almost feels like a “Legacy” sequel but it’s not. 

It’s technically akin to something like Batman 1989 where the origin isn’t a full focal point. But it strangely leads into something. Weird comparison, it’s more like, “Let’s kind of skip the origin and just show it really quick” kind of shit.

2. The idea to use elements from the first four films is actually a fucking genius idea. Because you’re practically blending in what are basically considered possibly the best films or so and combine into one story without having to make more than one film.

Even though I genuinely wouldn’t mind a legitimate remake of the first film. But I keep thinking general audiences just want to see Jason.

3. The portrayal of Jason is still my favorite of all the actors. Even though I like them all. But Derek Mears is the kind of Jason I love. And honestly, I see this as a Jason film mainly because of the number of times he shows up. 

4. Trent’s entire character. This may sound strange, but holy crap. Even though he’s not a favorite of mine. But he’s such a cartoonish douchebag that it downright amuses me with his fucking dialogue being so insane. That you’re in shock with how fucking douchey he is because Travis Van Winkle plays him so well. He’s strangely meme material.

WeWatchedAMovie’s review of the film where they talk about Trent, they explain it perfectly in the most humorous way. And there’s a scene and from that review, I hear that Michael Bay himself walked out halfway through the movie because there was...too many tities. I question this, like, did he actually say that somewhere?

5. I will admit, I actually like the score from Steve Jablonsky. Even if I still prefer Harry Manfredini’s scores.

-

Now on to the more negative stuff that...brings the film down.

1. The fact it’s the same as the earlier films...it’s kind of nothing special. Yet it’s special in a way where I don’t feel bothered by it like Halloween 2007 or Elm Street 2010. But the fact it’s kind of...somewhat nothing special brings it down. And this goes into the next thing I want to talk about.

2. The idea to use elements from the first four films is still genius. But the way the writers did it just wasn’t for me. The best way I could describe the film is how my good buddy @lovezdarestevez4ever​ said in her review of the film.

The film is practically a “CliffNotes” version of Friday the 13th from writers who watched the older films without paying attention to why certain elements worked. And honestly, considering I have a little problem with the writers...I agree. This is her review right here. https://at.tumblr.com/lovezdarestevez4ever/i-watched-friday-the-13th-2009-and-it-was/opxnm29hwwis

Because to me, the elements don’t blend naturally. Or they don’t use these elements in a more meaningful way. You know how like in comic book films they take elements from different stories and try to blend them in the best story possible to adapt? It’s a weird comparison. It’s just I think if Filmento ever did a video on Friday the 13th 2009, and I have thought about this before. He would point out stuff that feels like it wasn’t thought more about or whatever.

I again, think blending in those elements is a cool idea because in a strange way. I could see the first three films as a 277-minute-long film. I actually used my computer’s calculator to look that shit up. Yet this likely counts the beginning and end credits for all three films.

The point being is that considering this was directed by the guy who directed the 2003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. I feel like they could’ve done more with those elements and did something new with them or build upon them. I strangely wished that the write for that remake came back for this instead of the writers from Freddy vs Jason. But that depends on what Scott Kosar would’ve done, or maybe another writer.

I do appreciate the decision to go back to the “Grittier” route of the earlier FT13th films. That was something needed after the last few films.

3. And the characters, and listen, I get a lot of FT13th characters aren’t much to write home about. But I agree with my friend that they are more like...parodies in a sense. Where in the originals, the characters seem more casual despite a lot being service level. And while I think Clay is one of the better protagonists of the series, the other characters are hit and miss. Despite a lot of them get a lot of brutal kills as usual.

There’s also the fact the storyline with Jason and Whitney couldn’t been dealt with so much better. Because that is something I REALLY like, but it’s not built upon more or something.

I should just finish the post. The 2009 reboot is basically a modernized version of part 3, but without the 3D. And you get elements from parts 1, 2, and 4. It seems weird that I use part 3 as an example. Mainly because part 3 feels like the most “Random” or “Disconnected” because NO ONE besides Chris knows of Jason in that film. And they never say his name.

#GeekGem Rambles #friday the 13th #friday the 13th 2009

[haleigh-sloth]

Any anime recommendations?(besides mha)

OOF

Funny enough I don't even recommend the MHA anime LOL. Anyway.

My taste is pretty basic, not gonna lie. I doubt anything I can recommend knowing what I'm recommending is anything most people haven't seen. But I will do my best.

Just anime? Or manga too? 😭

Here is my list of current and completed series, but it's mostly, if not all, manga. I recommend pretty much everything on those lists (otherwise I wouldn't have/wouldn't be currently spending time on them 🌝).

But, since you said anime, I'll just stick with the anime I know are good (imo).

Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood <-------the Brotherhood is very important. I really fucking hate the first anime and don't know why it even exists tbh. BROTHERHOOD. Also, I highly recommend the English dub. Usually, I don't. But for this particular anime the English dub cast was top tier (a lot of them are in the BNHA dub actually..though I still prefer bnha sub) and idk, it just really gets the story across really well with the English cast.

Fruits Basket: 2019 <------there are two Fruits Basket anime. The first one from 2001 stops at volume 6 (out of 23 total 😬) and has a shitty ending. The remake created in 2019 covers the whole story (well, most of it). However, if you want a good laugh, the 2001 version English dub is....hilarious. I will give it that. It's fucking hilarious. If you just want to laugh and not take it too seriously, just watch like the first half of the 2001 series in English lmao. For the 2019 I personally recommend the Japanese cast, because they used the same cast from the 2001 series and it doesn't fit the dark tone of the actual full storyline. That's just my preference though. Also, this is a love story at its core. The kind of love story that gives you butterflies lol.

Ouran High School Host Club: Oh how I wish this one would get the Fruits Basket treatment and get a remake covering the entire story. But alas. The anime is fun, it's goofy, it's ridiculous. But it's insanely popular for a reason. This anime literally has the same English cast as FMAB, so I recommend either/or, Japanese or English. It's great both ways. (this is a love story also, but unfortunately the anime doesn't capture that)

**fun fact, the first three listed here are all women creators :)

K Project: This one is really good, and is better as an anime because that was what it was first, before being broken down into different manga series (which I also recommend). There are segments to the anime though, it goes K Project (first season)---> K: Missing Kings (a movie that bridges the two seasons and is necessary)---> K: Return of Kings (season 2)---> K: Seven Stories (dives into different characters' pasts--because big cast). If you like shows with big casts where all of them get focus, and there's a ton of shit going on all at once that all meets at one endpoint, then this is the series for you. Warning though, unfortunately there are two fan service characters you have to stomach through. It's not so god awful it can't be ignored, but it's annoying at best. But again, it's not prevalent enough to take away from the whole series.

Durarara!!: I mean this one is old and it's insanelyyyyy popular. I prefer the manga, 100x more than the anime due to how confusing the anime gets with the storyline, but many many people like the anime for what it is. And I do too, as it's entertaining as fuck. There is also a second series called Durarara!! x2, which is basically a sequel (both series follow the manga, just....out of order), and Drrr!!x2 has 3 seasons within itself. But this series is good. I'm reading it currently and fucking LOVING it. The anime is super fun and ridiculous in a good way, highly recommend. This one is super unique. It has a large cast and several different POVs (the manga is split up into series covering the different POVs), and there aren't really any side characters, as pretty much everyone plays a decently relevant role in all of the story's conflicts. There are only 4 characters who seem to dominate above the rest of the cast, and they aren't even technically the main protagonists (anyone who knows this series probably knows who these characters are lolol)

Charlotte: idk if there is a manga but I watched the anime and it slapped. It's like 20 something episodes, it's fun, has conflict, lots of emotions, and a pretty decent conclusion.

Darker Than Black: this is pretty much just an anime. It has two seasons. It's been years since I watched it, and I've been meaning to rewatch it ASAP, but this one also is insanely good.

Silver Spoon: I'm planning to read the manga for the full story, but the anime was fun. It's a good breather from tons of action if you're needing something light hearted. ***same author/creator as FMAB :)

Death Note: highly recommend, but....most people have seen or read this LOL

#personal recs #anime recommendation #i'm much more of a manga person #but #certain ones are just better as an anime #darker than black and k project being great examples #god i need to rewatch darker than black #i hope these maybe introduced you to some new stuff #but i doubt it lolol #anime #manga #anonymous #tbh i have watched more anime than this #i got a decent way into the monogatari series #but it lost me #it's not that great #i have a few anime under my belt that i think sucked ass and wouldn't recommend lolol

[summersareknives]

ess! <3

last night i went stargazing to see that comet that hasnt been visible since 50,000 years ago and it was pretty cool. the moon was out & i saw sirius too so i took a pic of them together #wolfstar5EVERRR

ur so right james would absolutely use duolingo to learn french for reg. that man is WHIPPED hed do anything for him.

tay time! you belong with me, style, & london boy <3

chat chat!

timmy and flo my absolutely beloveds. i think id probably watch anything theyre in (except maybe dont worry darling, even if it feels like a "movie". idk maybe its hilarious.)

tourists piss me off SO much sometimes. especially when theyre taking pictures of random shit like. clouds or trees. girl you dont have clouds or trees where you live???

i think a lot of cats are predisposed to be heinous bitches tbh. i can always count on my cats to be blunt when i need them to be <3

and wait blaise/luna.... i kinda love this too. adding those fics to my tbr, ty <3 i have another fic rec, lessen my load by moonymoment (wolfstar muggle au, remus finds sirius having a breakdown in a laundromat cause he put a red glove in his white wash)

if u do end up trying out the incest chronicles, giving u a fair warning that the first books are like so cringey. they were written in 2007-onwards and u can definitely tell. theyre def not for everybody but the prequel/sequel series are SO good. but godspeed anyways.

ben barnes in podg is SO sirius idk what it is abt him hes great. when people use his scenes in edits with sirius i eat it up every damn time.

handing in ur paper 8 mins before its due? u know what, u deserve a drink for that. drunk procrastinators never miss fr.

and yes im very excited to read that whenever u get around to writing it! no pressure ofc take your time <3

and damn ROYAL butter? okay i understand now. 4 tubs is very fair. and TOBLERONE on god is one of my fav chocolates. second maybe to terrys chocolate oranges imo.

dancing in the kitchen to jazz does sound super peaceful. sometimes moments like that feel like theyre straight out of a cute little movie and it makes life feel a little happier <3

please try poutine. its so good. and ur right jello salad is a crime. feels like a hate crime tbh.

colourful cars will always have my heart fr. leaving a tip after being driven around is a good idea maybe i should start doing that.

ill let u know when ive started the apprentice, im excited to see the hyde guy now. and kim kardashian lady too.

platonic soulmates>>> i think we lucked out with our best friends. lu walking through the rain for ur turnover? i love that sm. ur right L names do have some spice in them.

and yay geoguessr! i was shit at first too. but i got sucked in and like studied license plates and fucking road lines and signs so id be good. it aint much but its honest work. (i graciously thank u for the apple turnover. ur too kind)

i hope i dont have a gay realisation superpower. thats like having anti rizz. everyone whos liked me turning out to be gay? like yes im glad i could help but. as long as my soulmate likes me ig.

i love ur james fc sm. i love that theres so many different james fcs too like hes just everywhere <3 andrew & ben will always be remus & sirius but at the same time, they still dont look quite like how i imagine them to be. i think likeafunerall's art is as close as anything has ever gotten to them so ig theyre just too pretty in my mind for a real human to look even close to them. good for them.

and HUGH! hugh and lil timmy tim are like the only PERFECT fcs in my mind. everyone else has some wiggle room but not evan and reg. theyre just perfect.

ur so lucky to be a gryffindor. how does it feel to live my dream??

orpheus & eurydice </3 "if u must die, let love be the reason why" ARE U TRYING TO KILL ME?????? ill never get over them ever.

tbh i think soldiers are cool af. i saw a tiktok that said sirius would be the soldier (remus = poet, james = king) so thats also cool .

and no way u were listening to work song . i listened to that like 10 mins ago. hozier my beloved <3

athena kids are cool as hell. like go off smartypants! but yes raising the dead sounds cool too. idk what id use that power for cause i definitely dont need an undead army to fight for me so. maybe i can use it to talk to like. julius caesar or something.

tay NEVER MISSES!!!

and yes bowie for LIFE. also knee socks>>>> love that song sm. AM changed my life too. HS1 def altered my brain chemicals too (i got to see him in concert. it changed my life fr)

erudite !!!! <3

and yes its barbaric as fuck. if ive learned anything from studying ancient history its that humans have always been fucked up. so thats always nice.

silver jewellry is so cool . goes so well with my black leather jacket & docs cause im nothing if not channelling sirius black energy into my appearance at all times <3 u loving gold cause its expensive is so real. like yes its bougie as hell. and? also v gryffindor of u. cause its gold. u just need to wear red and ur set.

ur right tay does have that range. still love lana but she just has an overall darker tone which isnt always the vibe. miss taylor never misses.

LISTEN IM SORRY!!!! I LOVE CRUEL SUMMER SM. theyre both completely tied for me but i was just in a dont blame me kinda mood ig.

and yes the great war is very much a cr song. theres a chapter named the great war so its just a lot. so heartbreaking but SO beautiful. but my tears ricochet <3 like u know what taylor, ur right. i DIDNT have it in myself to go with grace.

lilac candles <3 theyre so nice. and yes. it did smell like piss. not sure what i expected tbh. but yeah

slow walkers are the worst and i agree people blocking hallways????? so annoying. especially when they walk slowly in these big groups that span the width of the hall and theyre too busy talking to notice EVERYONE trying to get by. UGHHH

having 2 middle names is so cool i wish i had 2 tbh.

on GOD that hc kills me. every time i watch poa i think of it and i get so sad.

i love winter sm too. personally im an autumn girly but winter is a close second. i love the festiveness sm <3

i loved chemistry too. yes i did drop it for bio cause im shit at math and bio has less numbers but idc it was still fun. and we do NOT talk about physics i hate that subject with my whole heart.

id pick hogwarts too honestly. i just wanna be magic u know.

and a coin collector thats so cool. i love unique coins sm. we had some here in canada a while ago that had the northern lights on them and GLOWED IN THE DARK (pic here)!! they were so cool i think i still have a few.

cardigan has my heart. but i think if i had to pick id choose mirrorball BUT only because i personally relate to it more. cardigan will forever be more heartbreaking and ofc, i cant listen to it without thinking abt wolfstar so.

a fellow erudite! we're superior for sure i just know it.

unicorn is such a good choice. theyre so cool and being able to grant wishes would be so fun. i think id choose a phoenix cause theyre fiery and cant die. also cause i change my appearance all the time so in a way its like a phoenix rising from the ashes all funky and brand new.

the vibes in the 50s was so cool i agree (minus the racism sexism and homophobia fuck that shit!!!!) . all i want in life is to go to a cute little 50s diner and drink milkshakes and listen to 50s music. i would love to go to ancient rome or greece but purely for the vibes and aesthetic tbh. id hate to go there cause im a woman and women werent generally considered people in the greek world </3 especially ancient athens, women were discouraged from leaving the house & if they did they had to cover their entire body head to toe. (to preserve their dignity and whatnot). i personally like a little more freedom than that so, no thanks <3

ur ideal first date>>>> literally perfect ideas. ESPECIALLY the bookstore i just love the idea of a cute lil bookstore date. & of course just walking and talking i feel like is so necessary to get to know someone yk?

being rejected from netball and taking it as a personal attack i feel u so hard. id be pissed if that happened to me.

and game night! monopoly game night sounds so fun. i actually cant play monopoly anymore cause i get so competitive and it makes me mad and it pisses everyone off LOL so ive been banned. i do love me some chess though.

art <3 omg have fun on saturday that sounds awesome. the closest art gallery to me is pretty lame most of the time which sucks cause i only get to see cool art when i travel which isnt a whole lot lmfao. cafe terrace at night is such a gorgeous work of art. i love van gogh sm. my mom is actually a painter and van gogh is her fav artist so she paints van gogh recreations its pretty cool.

answering qs!~

ideal first date: either art gallery or museum. there is nothing in this world i love more than art and history and humanity so being able to see it with someone i like & being able to infodump random fun facts about history would be the dream. ofc we have to stop at a bookstore (ideally we pick out books for each other cause i love that idea its so cute) and stargazing. i love the stories behind the constellations so its always fun to talk abt them.

rep vs lover: i think lover. its just so good and the vibes are astronomical. dont get me wrong i adore rep too but i think rep is better for when im feeling vengeful <3

hozier vs am: god this is so hard but i think im gonna have to say hozier. hes just such an incredible songwriter and his music i swear i can feel it in my BONES its so visceral. his lyrics rip me apart too theyre just so good.

i dont play sports. in general i hate sports and physical activity (except i do on occasion fuck up a game of badminton) i used to be a dancer and gymnast but that was a long time ago. i did a bit of volleyball when i was like. 11? 12? but i hated it.

fav board game: prob settlers of catan! idk what it is about it but i love that game. i love chess too but i get too competitive sometimes so.

take me to church vs work song: work song. "no grave can hold my body down, ill crawl home to her" ARE U KIDDING???? such a perfect song. i love tmtc so very much too. "i was born sick" hits different when ur a closeted little kid whos figuring life out

fav season: autumn forever. i just love the vibes and the temperature is usually perfect, not too hot not too cold. cozying up with a sweater and tea and a book is all i need. ofc winter is a close second cause christmastime.

fav food: probably pasta. my dad is from italy so i eat a lot of pasta. bolognese, chicken cacciatore, & penne alla vodka are personal favourites & my comfort foods.

fav marauder hc: i have a few random ones i love, like that james sings really loudly in the shower, that sirius was left handed (bc im left handed and i say so), also that regulus would be a black cat if he was an animagus. hes just got sm little black cat energy i love him. also lily being a night owl & james being an early bird, lily getting annoyed cause james is TOO happy in the early morning and shes just done w him.

one ship i hate: i HATED dorcas/peter in atyd. i know it was written way before dorlene got really popular but it was still such a jumpscare to read. also i know a lot of people seem to like them but regulus/remus?? personally no thanks. i can see why theyd be cute but sirius is the ONLY one for remus imo. i much prefer regulus and remus to be besties and talk shit ab sirius together cause they love him <3

patronus: ive done the test a few times and ive gotten rattlesnake, grey owl, & raven. personally i wouldve loved a cat but sadly no

favourite piece of art: ive got a few actually ( i love art sm.) loch lomond by gustave dore, wheat field with cypresses by van gogh, and hygieia by gustav klimt❤️

ginny or luna: luna. i love ginny SM but luna was my fav character as a kid so she has my heart. i also have her wand so its only fair i pick her <3

favourite restaurant: probably this one thats out in the city, theyve got the BEST gyoza ive ever had in my life. and they make good martinis so. but you cant go wrong with mcdonalds late at night when u need something greasy. also dairy queen (do u have those in the uk? i feel like theyre just in north america) has some good ass ice cream sundaes.

fav beverage: i love coffee, iced coffee to be specific. root beer and cream soda too. red sangrias and espresso martinis are top tier too.

qs for u!

whats one song ur convinced was written abt u?

patronus?

if u could only listen to 1 song for the rest of ur life, which song would u pick?

if u could have a superpower, which one would u want?

messy or organized?

favourite candy/chocolate/sweet?

if u could meet one dead historical figure, who would u choose?

take me to church vs work song.

whats your go-to hype songs when ur getting ready/going out?

fav type of weather?

fav thing youve ever dressed up as for halloween?

thats all for now! till next time <3

-bee

bee hi ! I thought you'd abandoned me , and I'm so glad you're back , I missed you !!!

OH MY GOD ??? you were star/comet gazing ??? that's so cool and so sirius of u !!! (also yes , take the photo , even the universe ships them, wolfstar 5ever.)

YES !!!! get u a man who learns French like James Potter would for regulus black !!! he is amazing , stellar , the one , the only , there is no one like him.

tay tay time !!! -

you belong with me - JEGULUS - I can see it as wolf star too , but I'll give it to regulus. like an au where reg and sirius and James were all best friends , and reg had a little crush on mr James the jock , but him having a gf , and regulus being all 'you belong with me' THEM

style- JILY- this could go for literally so many ships. like wolfstar , jily, anything. I chose jily , simply because i feel that just like the hook , james and lily never go out of style. and also lily would ask him about reg , and he would tell her the whole truth & nothing but the truth. in a muggle au i totally see them as on and off and on and off until they’re finally on again and this time it sticks forever.

london boy - WOLFSTAR - listen , I know remus is welsh (or half , at least) so I think of him meeting sirius in an au in some au , and being all 'DIMPLE' 'ACCENT' 'GOD I LOVE THE ENGLISH' (au/oneshot idea??) 'in the pub watching rugby with his school friends ??? yes yes yes , them them them !!! so them , I could cry !!!

chatting time <333

I too would watch anything and everything. save dwd , its reviews are terrible and I cba to check for myself.

'girl you don't have clouds or trees where you live ?' HOWLING THIS IS SO FUNNY. and true , honestly. what's so English and special about our clouds and trees?? if u show someone back home will they go 'ahh yess , this is an English cloud , native to the England !'

cats just tell it like it is. it's just the truth. cats for the win , I love cats u love cats we all do. we are humans and they're gods.

ik ik blaise/luna is a funny little side pairing and I love them they're actually so cute!!! (the fics are dhr and drarry so do take care of that !! but they're there. I love the little hints.)

LESSON MY LOAD OH MY GOD !!!! ON MY LIST , DOWNLOADED. (I love the sound of it. very interesting. I would also cry because of a red sock. I WOULD SUE. SUE.)

cringey series. hmm. I think I'll take a crack. I've braved through wattpad , I can brave through this too. I am a soldier after all.

IT'S THE SMILE I'M TELLING YOU IT'S THE SMILE. SOMETHING ABOUT HIM ,,, IT'S JUST SIRIUS.

drunk procrastinators forever !! (me because I have an exam in 45 minutes and I'm writing this rn instead of doing last minute revision ! but at least Lu's coming to pick me up !!!!! drivers r so good for ur health.)

I'm excited to write it. but I must get ahead with my writing of doa and sito. I'M SO EXCITED. it shall hurt ! it is fake/secret dating ! it is the bet trope !

IT'S ROYAL BUTTER INDEED. I have no idea why I felt the need to do that. but we shall march on and ignore the royal butter in the fridge.terry's chocolate oranges stay winning though >>> (did u see that video of the American/australian BITING into one ?? I almost cried like what the fuck u bitch u should be banned from Europe for this crime) TOBLERONE. MY DRUNK ARSE WANTED TOBLERONE. so does my sober arse though. so fair. fair. I see u drunk me. I see u.

it's so peaceful. straight out of the movie . (especially because it was raining too) and he was laughing whenever I stepped on him , and it was so sweet and ahhhhh !! try it , 'tis a remedy for all the types of pain ever !!! get u a best friend (liz would do it maybe ?) and dance. just dance , quite literally !!!!

jello salad is a hate crime. war crime. whoever created it should go to hell. with the salad. (I WILL BE TRYING POUTINE. IT SOUNDS SO GOOD OMG.)

colourful cars >>>> (remember to only do one cent. after all , they should be happy to have you in their car. really , you're doing them the favour.)

yes!!! lmk !!! I must know your opinions on them !!!

I keep getting like 3.2 km away from the actual answer and it's so annoying. like I'm sorry I guessed Ithaca and not buttfuck , usa.

WE DID LUCK OUT WE DID. they're actually the best people ever. no one will ever be better than them.(though , they lucked out too.) L NAMES 5EVER. LU AND LIZ 5EVER ACTUALLY !!!!!

LMFAO NOT THE ANTI-RIZZ.ur soulmate will like u !! I know they will !! and u have liz for now !! let's vibe and be drunk with our L best friends !! romantic love will come in its own time :))))) (also for me when I liked Victoria , it was me being like 'is she gay/queer/likes women ??? and then it was like - she did. but I found that out because she had a girlfriend. and she's kind of a bitch now that I don't like her. I hope she fails her exams , damn.)

omg likeafuneralls art is fucking magical !! I worship the art so much. I was actually thinking of printing them out and sticking them up on my wall !!!! and yes , so many James fcs !!! (my James is my personal favourite , but I'm biased) I adore all of them !!! (and omg I so get not having an fc too !! they're just ethereal .... no human will ever be good enough for them.)

HUGH AND TIMMY TIM TIM >>>>>>>>>> (I love them sm sm they r my heart. did u see the Apple TV ad where Timmy sees Gary Oldman ?? look it up you'll get what I mean.)

DUDE ME NEITHER. WE CAN BE SAD OVER THEM TOGETHER !!!!!! ( I was secretly trying to kill you, u figured out my plan !!!)

DID YOU SEE LIKEAFUNERALL’S ART OF THIS EXACT SITUATION?????? IT’S SO GOOD (she has soldier sirius , poet remus & king james)

WORK SONG MAKES ME CRY A LOT. "no grave can hold my body down , I'll crawl home to her" has been engraved into my brain. ENGRAVED I TELL U.

if u talk to caesar ask him how he felt before he died. was it like a Jesus style betrayal??? like did he at least get a little kiss before ??

tay I love tay tay changed my LIFE.

BOWIE BOWIE (STARMAN STARTS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND) knee sock was so funny because when it started playing yesterday , I was wearing my knee socks under my t-shirt dress , and lu was wearing his sky blue Lacoste ??? like Alex turner was watching us fr fr.

here's my concert story - my best friend went to the 1975 concert. and he went , and he came back , and he said 'Matty had a special guest on tonight' and I was like 'who' and then he whipped out a tissue and gave it to me and was like 'Taylor' I SOBBED. SOBBED. (also will harry ever stop touring??? is he not tired??? and also I'm pretty mad at him for the 'never leave America' thing. bitch forgot where he came from.)

eruditessssss!!!

at least we're a different kind of fucked up now though ! that's good !

u r so very sirius. I dress in red and gold a lot , actually?? but I have a lot of colours. rn I'm in white and green !!! I love gold jewellery with all my heart it just hits different for me <33333

u better love cruel summer. but I SO GET BEING IN A dbm mood , because that's so real. poison ivyyyyy now I'm your daisyyyyyy.

bro now I'm scared. now my timbers have been shivered. (I'm on chapter two still for reference.) I LOVE LOVE LOVE . (and I heard them stolen lullabies all right)

gonna go buy one from the big Tesco 2nite , now you've convinced me. (Rome , the great city. of piss. and gladiators. but mostly piss.)

HALL BLOCKERS WILL GO TO HELL knock them bitches over like do u even know how many times I've been late because of them ??? little bastards.

two middle names is kinda fun actually. I can go by them if I won't (I don't want) and I just have more names in my name , yk?? ( one middle name is ALSO cool btw. )

it makes me cry a lil. (professor lupin???? no , uncle moony !!!!)

winter for me , because in England , even when it's summer , it's winter !!! (also thank u for calling it autumn , not fall.) BUT I LOVE AUTUMN TOO , PUMPKIN LATTES ARE STELLAR !!!

I have my chemistry exam tomorrow !! and I do bio too unfortunately. (I have the bio exam today. I feel queasy. ) BUT YEAH FUCK PHYSICS FUCK NEWTON FUCK ELECTRICITY !!!!!

I so get u bee , I too just wanna be magic.

eruditessssss!!! erudite erudite erudite !!!!

I love coins omg. I want them all. I'm on the lookout for the paddington one , and I feel it in the air. I think I'm very close to it. (also glow in the dark ??? that's so cool???)

nah , I get relating to a song so hard. I too relate to songs. ( u relating to mirrorball is so fucking real of u. so real.)

YES PHOENIX !!!! AND U CAN HEAL BASILISK TEARS TOO , DON'T FORGET !!!!! (unicorns>>>>)

I know , if not for the racism and other shit , I'd so visit the '50s. honestly , the old-times vibes and the dinners and just- ahhhhh. (damn misogyny is everywhere.that fucking sucks I hate that sm)

I KNOW I KNOW. the bookstore thing is so so so cool for me. (closest I've ever come is the grocery store at night with lu , but also we were drunk and also we bought so so so many things) and yes!! just chatting and laughing and having fun and - being , yk???

I did take it hard. I took it so hard. (I scored , but I still didn't get in?? well bitch damn I hope u lose every single game !!)

getting competitive with monopoly is something different (I've stolen some money before , and now I'm not allowed to be the banker !! so that sucks.) I'm going to learn chess one day. I will. I want to play. I shall learn it.

OMG SISGDLIWQHVDJLWQVCBX your mom sounds so cool???? Van Gogh recreations ??? I salute her she sounds fucking amazing (cafe terrace at night is just it for me. I love it. I even have a notebook with it on the front !!!)

---- I'm taking a break from answering because I have to go do a fuckin exam now give me a second ----

back now lmfao totally fucking flunked fuck biology & fuck life , but at least my arse is being warmed and i’m listening to taylor. (i think i’m being driven to the bakery. i think. he won’t say anything. but we’re not going home for sure.)

YOUR MOM JUST GETS IT FR FR. van gogh is my favourite artist too , so she understands. he a tortured soul me a tortured soul. done & dusted.

reviewing your q’s

OMG THAT’S SO CUTE ????? I’M IN TEARS ????? that’s so romantic omg i hope u get that one day i really really do.(feel free to info dump on me anytime.) AND YESSSS ART AND HISTORY AND HUMANITY STAY WINNING ALWAYS (my favourite art museum is tate and fave history one is the natural history museum in central london i love it so so much.) AHHH OMG PICKING OUT BOOKS FOR EACH OTHER ??? (and annotating them and talking about them and showing each other and oh my god romance romance 💘) I LOVE CONSTELLATIONS TOO. as an ex-astronomy student , i understand the stories and fucking love info-dumping about them. (lu has been the unfortunate victim of most of this dumping.)

rep for when you are in ur rep era is so real. I need that album for killing and revenge and shit. lover is the vibe i want my life to feel like , so i’d pick lover too.

HOZIER IS IN MY BONES. I TOO WANT TO CRAWL OUT OF MY GRAVE. I TOO WANT TO WORSHIP AT SOMEONE’S SHRINE. I TOO WANT TO BE THE ANGEL OF SMALL DEATH AND THE CODEINE SCENE!!!!!! hozier > am (i love am too though don’t get me wrong they’re bae<333)

i hate physical activity too , mate. . I LIKE BADMINTON TOO SOMETIMES THAT SHUTTLECOCK IS FUN TO BAT AROUND. (only sometimes.) all i shall do is watch lu do his sports. i shall do nothing else. (hating sports is so valid of us !!!)

take me to church hits different but work song >>> no grave can hold my body down FUVKING CHANGED MY LIFE. i will rise from the dead for my other half when i die.

u described it so right , autumn is like that. just right. very remus of you , methinks. BUT CHRISTMAS FOR THE WIN , I’M SORRY !!!

ooh , an italian *does the hands* (sorry but you know i had to) you said a lot of pasta i will have to now eat. i will eat all of them. me , personally , my dad is portuguese a so i got a fucking range of food when i was a kid . like francesinha , bacalhau , caldo verde >>>> (sandwich , fish , soup in that order. all vv spicy.)

HE SO HAS THAT BLACK CAT ENERGY. regulus black is a black cat 2023 spread the word. as a shower singer , i vv much agree james would do that. oooh sirius is a left-hand. yk what i actually like that one . JILY AGENDA WHERE SHE’S THE SLEEPY ONE AND HE’S THE GET UP AND GO ONE <3333

I too do not much rate the dorcas/peter. it’s surprising now especially because of the dorlene and how i think they’re perfect for each other. so obviously , i don’t want them to get with anyone else . and reg/remus ??? that’s odd. i might be hoodwinked into reading a one-shot here & there but nothing more than that.

rattle snake , grey owl and raven ??? that’s a slytherin if i ever saw one. (also ravenclaw potential tbh.) and what a range of animals ??? fabulous.

I LOOKED AT THEM AND OH MY GOD THEY’RE SO GOOD ???? I LOVE THEM TOO NOW DAMN THEY’RE FABULOUS.

u have luna’s wand. i am very jealous rn. (love ginny but i agree with your decision to pick luna. i love her too much to pick anyone else.)

gyoza sounds so good. i could really go for some rn. (late night mcdonalds SMACKS.) and no we don’t have dairy queen in the uk. is that like an ice cream thing ?? sounds like that?? i want to try that now.

iced coffee >>>> AND OH MY GOD THERE’S THIS SODA AT THE CORNER SHOP ‘BARRS CREAM SODA’ I GET IT SO OFTEN IT’S MY FAVOURITE FIZZY DRINK EVER AHHHH. (i need 2 try sangria. i need to. ‘tis on my list.)

my q’s. -

this is me trying . there’s probably more that I can’t think of rn , but this is me trying. I am this is me trying. i used to be the one gifted kid who got rlly high scores without trying and now i have to do twice as much work for a fucking B. which is annoying. but yeah! ( I might tell u more if I remember them next time.)

black swan! i think that’s pretty cool actually !!!!

my tears ricochet. (or cruel summer) but if i had to choose , my tears ricochet. EVERY FUCKING TIME. ‘STOLEN LULLABIES OOOWIWOHOOO’

shapeshifting !! i think i’d love to shapeshift. it’d be so fun , i’m a snake , i’m a lion , i’m an old woman , i’m a muscle man. FUNNNN.

messy as fuck. 90% of the time my socks come back from the wash and at least one is missing at all times. fucking dk where they go man.

YOU HAVE UNLOCKED SOMETHING HERE.okay , terry’s chocolate orange & smarties. I fucking LOVE smarties (& toblerone of course , we mustn’t forget the Toblerone.) AND ALSO JAFFA CAKES. CANNOT CHOOSE ONE.

SHAKESPEARE. need 2 ask about the ‘fair youth’ and also about his wife & about his plays and ahhhh. i love his plays sm and i just really would love to meet him<333

work song. i love take me to church sm , but work song . why??? “NO GRAVE CAN HOLD MY BODY DOWN , I’LL CRAWL HOME TO HER.”

promiscous , worth it , one look , knee socks , jealous (nj) , & …ready for it ? THESE ARE CLASSICSSSS . HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS MIX.

snow. by far. love making snowmen , n dressing them up and snowball fights. love it so so so much.

i did lady macbeth (n lu was macbeth) at a halloween party once!! I loved it vv much the fake blood and the scorpion prop , and the crown i made for lu. very realistic. (second is it and georgie. u know who it was and who georgie was. take a guess .)

q’s for u -

fuck marry kill - lily , pandora , marlene.

fuck marry kill - regulus , barty, evan.

what do you love spending money on ?

tell me one inside joke you have with liz (or just anyone, i only assume you’d have more with liz)

one weird fear you have?

weirdest dare you’ve taken in a game of truth or dare?

worst random impulse buy?

your favourite quote ever ?

your favourite quote from a fic ?

ever met a celeb ? (which one if yes?)

favourite snack ?

do u have a crush on anyone ? (skip this one if you don’t want to answer it & I’m terribly sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable!!!)

Who knows you best ?

lover (the song) vs getaway car?

all time favourite moment in your life ?

what’s your favourite moment with liz ? (curious to cut into that bff dynamic)

r(egg) or r(edge)?

do you speak any other languages (except english)?

bee bee bee <333 until next time , my friend. come back soon , or else i’ll start worrying.

#ess water a plant #bee <33 #ess’s marauders x ts crossover

[thefanficmonster]

Just Another One

Sequel to: ‘A Little Bit Of Honesty’

Corpse Husband x Actress!Reader (Female)

Warnings: Angst, Heartbreak, Mention of bad past relationships, Swearing

Genre: Angst, Romance, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: They keep proving each other right in the most wrong ways possible. They each want to be guarded even if that means the other will be hurt. Maybe that’s what they want - to hurt one another because they’ve already hurt each other once before.

Requested by the lovely readers who enjoyed the previous fic ‘A Little Bit Of Honesty’. Sorry for the large time gap between the posting of the two fics but I still hope you guys will take the time to read it and if so I hope you enjoy it! Love you all with all my heart, Vy ❤

When you go out of your way to avoid leaving the house your options of entertainment are severely limited and you can’t blame anyone or anything but yourself for it. Today, I wouldn’t have gone out of my apartment even if I was one of those people who frequent the outdoors seeing as how the sky is trying to flood the Earth with all this nonstop rain. It does set a mood for a perfect night in but when you spend all your nights in doing the same thing over and over again, the atmosphere is practically meaningless. And so I ‘ve decided to resort to channel surfing as though I’ll find something interesting on TV that I haven’t yet seen on one of my social media timelines.

I pass several cooking channels on my journey, making a mental note of their individual numbers in case I don’t stumble across anything capable of better distracting me from my boredom and loneliness that’s slowly starting to creep in. I pass by a few movie channels showing teenage romcoms as if to celebrate the start of summer so you can imagine how quickly I moved on from those. Then come the celebrity channels which can often get a laugh out of me because of how pathetic and unbelievably ridiculous they are. And so, I stick around one where there’s a broadcast on a movie showing that’s happening tonight in LA. Oddly enough, despite my anxiety, going to a movie showing has always been on my list of things I’d want to do. This can be considered living vicariously or rubbing salt into the wound that I’ll probably never go because my anxiety and fear of being recognized is too severe. Either way I stick around to watch it.

And man do I regret it now looking at several different angels of a couple of actors entering the venue where they are to be photographed and asked questions by the mob of paparazzi that’s gathered due to the massive event. That in and of itself doesn’t sound - and really isn’t - so bad. However, it’s important to note that the actress in this duo is Y/N. Y/N L/N. My Y/N....shit, sorry, I mean my FRIEND Y/N, her arm linked with whatever-the-fuck-his-name-is who is holding an umbrella above the both of them, shielding them from the downpour of rain that is also taking place in LA apparently.

“The two were seen entering the venue earlier this evening, looking particularly cozy in each other’s presence if I do say so myself. The rain probably worked nicely in their favor.“ The first reporter says, her teasing tone of voice sending chills of anger down my spine as I glare at the screen, hands balled in fists, jaw clenched - all my body’s instinctive reactions to what is being shown to me. I know I technically have no right to behave or feel this way, in fact I should be fucking happy for Y/N and her successful career and the progress in her love life. But damn it how can I?! I was so damn close to kissing this girl! I was so fucking close to falling in another trap, tripping and landing in the embrace of another liar and user, another girl who switches partners more often than shoes. How could I’ve been so reckless to get so close to her even platonically? How did we become close enough for me to 1) show her my face; 2) start inviting her over to my apartment regularly; and how didn’t I notice the kind of messed up person she was all that time.

She was all sweet and flirting and shit a week or so ago and now she’s doing the exact same thing with him! The cameras are capturing them perfectly: every laugh, every exchange of a knowing look or nod, ever smack to his arm when he tells a joke. But what bothers me most is the many times he’s wrapped his arm around her to pull her closer. Not just for pictures, but just because the fucker felt like it! And Y/N doesn’t seem to mind it at all. 

“They have been the talk of the town recently, so while they could just be adding fuel to the fire, they could also have been caught by the flame and ‘caught feelings’ as they say. Regardless these two are a view we’d like to see more often.“ The other reporter says and that’s the final straw.

In one swift motion I turn the TV off and throw the remote across the room. It hits the wall and falls to the ground in several pieces, broken by the force of the impact. Just like I am broken by the force of the impact of these news. I don’t know which is worse: the fact that I fell for her and almost let her know it; the fact that she’s just another member of the club I don’t want anywhere near my life; or the fact that I can’t believe it.

Yeah that’s right - one foolish part of me refuses to believe that’s she’d do such a thing. I think that’s the same part which is still in awe of her so you can bet I ignore that part the majority of the time.

She is just another one. Not the one. Having been hurt before doesn’t mean she won’t hurt me or anyone else she’s gonna be with. Hurt people hurt people.

And damn has she hurt me, probably without knowing a damn thing. How selfish can you be, Y/N? How selfish can you really get? And how much am I going to allow you to hurt me?

                                                             *  *  *

“Thank you so much, Andrew. I would’ve died on the spot of anxiety if I was on my own.“ I say to my best friend who is currently sitting next to me on a park bench, in a tux, eating a cheeseburger. I too am still in my gown and am also gorging on a cheeseburger of my own.

“Don’t mention it. Us anxious people need to stick together.“ He bumps his shoulder against mine, stealing a small genuine smile from me, “Plus I couldn’t not come with you. You know how much I like a good rumor.“

I scoff, “Of course you do, but then again there was no need to add to what the media has already made a whole-ass ship out of.” I roll my eyes and take another bite. My appetite hasn’t been in its best condition so I’m only eating this under Andrew’s orders. I have no idea how people can ship us romantically, he’s the definition of an older - and very bossy - brother to me. I wish I could tell each and every single one of those girls who hate me because I’ve ‘stolen their man’ that I’d most likely be their sister in law rather than man snatcher, seeing as how my relationship with Andrew is so sibling-like.

That’s because we’re too alike, no one gets that. People play the ‘opposites attract’ car more often than I consider rational. But  then again when they see a couple like Andrew and I - who are basically the same person in different bodies - they suddenly think we’re super compatible. Trust me, we’re not. And everyone who’s been on set with us will tell you the same.

“What can I say...“ he shrugs, smirking at me, “I like the fun. I bet Becca doesn’t though.“

I can’t help but huff. Andrew is the only one I’ve ever openly expressed my frustrations with Rebecca to. He was super helpful on the subject, seeing as how he can relate - many partners of his have tried to use him, some of which even succeeded. He’s more than qualified to school me on the topic but it turned more into sharing bad experiences. One of which was that instance back at Corpse’s apartment.

“And neither does Corpse I suppose.“ As though he’s read my mind, he pokes the hurt spot, pouring salt in the wound causing me to visibly cringe as though the pain was physical - because it was, I felt it in my chest and in my gut, a sharp stab of guilt and regret. 

Why did I let it come to that? Why did I let us get so close? How did I not think of the consequences?

“I don’t care if he does or doesn’t.“ My hand automatically reaches for the pocket of the jeans I’m not even wearing in search of a cigarette. Not that I’d be able to light one even if I had them on me - Andrew would smack it out of my hand before I could even take a single puff.

He has the audacity to laugh, “You’re such a bad liar, Y/N.”

That’s all he needs to say really - that’s enough to make me feel seen and understood. Though that’s not always a good thing. I often times wish he couldn’t read me so well. Better said: I wish I didn’t let myself be so readable, you know. I’m just glad he’s the one who sees me because if it were anyone else they’d use this vulnerability of mine against me. I’m well aware that it’s a weakness, a really inconvenient one, but damn it I can’t get rid of it. I feel like I’ll be less human if I lose it. Everyone’s allowed to be vulnerable, some just are lucky enough to choose who they’ll be vulnerable around. I’m lucky enough to to have a choice, not so lucky in the people I choose to trust. Guess that’s not a luck thing, it’s just my inability to decipher whether a person is worth all the pain and torture of coming clean to them or not. So far many people have burnt me but two stick out in particular - Becca and Corpse. Corpse especially, which is the odd thing considering he hasn’t even wronged me in any way. At least not yet.

“Your phone’s vibrating.“ Andrew says, pulling me out of my overflowing head when he hands me my phone which I handed to him because of my dress’ lack of pockets.

“Thanks.“ I mutter through a sigh as I take it from him, checking the notification I’ve gotten.

My stomach drops: it’s a message from Corpse.

“Hey I saw you are in LA but we have a stream tomorrow, will you still be participating?“

Before I can reply, he sends me another message.

“I know you’re probably very busy but we get the most viewership on the streams when you’re in them so....“

I’ve probably been staring at my phone screen for longer than I thought since Andrew felt the need to make sure I was still breathing: “Hey, you ok? You look terribly pale.” I can barely hear him let alone reply. I can’t hear my own thoughts to know what to reply to him. “Y/N, you’re scaring me.”

I’m scaring myself too, Andrew. I’m scared too. I’m scared of how broken my picker has become. I almost kissed this guy! I almost entrusted all my thoughts, hopes, wishes and goals to him! What the fuck was I thinking?! Well, at least I know what he was thinking about - viewership. Likes, subs, views, publicity. The more eyes on the stream the better for him and everyone else. I genuinely want to applaud him, no one has been so direct about using me before. I was in a relationship with Becca for almost a year before I accidentally found out what she had been doing the whole time. No one’s ever smacked me in the face with this much honesty. It’s bittersweet really.

I want to laugh, I want to cry, slap myself across the face, slap him...I want to do so much, but all I can do now is sit in silence and think of how I could be so stupid.

He’s just another one, how did I not see that? How do I never see it until it’s too late? Why is one part of me still screaming: ‘He didn’t mean it like that!’

AND WHY THE FUCK DO I WANT TO BELIEVE IT?

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