#holy shit you guys have ACTUAL FUCKING JOBS I DONT WANT TO FUCKING HEAR YOUR ISSUES hholy shit
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bsd ramblings (seasons 1, 2, and dead apple)
i would commit double suicide with dazai
why does everyone have a gyatt
kunikida x dazai??????
WHY ARE THE SIBLINGS SO WEIRDDDD
ranpo’s my scrungo
atsushi has trauma and is a furry
kunikida and endeavor sound really similar
dazai <33333
what the actual fuck is wrong with the doctor
oh hey ginger
oh those bitches are homosexual
the way they fight is so homoerotic
“go to hell! i was being saracastic!” — chuuya to his boyfriend
dazai x chuuya
atsushi x akutagawa
WHY IS EVERY SINGLE GUY IN BSD SO HOT
the animation has no right to be so good
kenji is so silly. i love him
kenji loving cows is so real of him
i need more port mafia exec dazai
“he both fears death and is drawn to it” ME FR
DAZAI <33333333333333333333
i want to hold dazai. i need to ruffle his hair. i want to commit suicide with him, my last words being heard by him only. i want to drown with this man, the holy water bringing us both to the afterlife. we will both be free.
chuuya is so silly
“come now, take me with you to the afterlife” DAZAI AJHDISBEUDBEUBD
dazai is a disaster bi and i love him for that
i pledge allegiance to the flag of bungo stray dogs and to the fandom for which it stands. one nation under dazai, indivisible, with fanfic and fanart for all.
dazai is down horrendous for oda. i don’t blame him
dazai my silly wet cat disaster bi husband <33333333333333333
akutagawa is so silly
WHY DID THE THEME SONG HAPPEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE EPISODE WTF
men <3
oda is my dad now bc i said so
the kid’s name is shinji? evangelion reference??
“because odasaku’s my friend” NO HE AINT DAZAI. HE’S YOUR UNREQUITED CRUSH.
“because i know my friend better than anyone” DAZAI’S LITTLE GASP OMFG IEBEKSHWJJDEBBE OMFG OMFG IM GONNA CRY DONT EVEN WINEUEHEJEJ (friend who got me into the show) YOU BITCH
“you’re a were-tiger, grow some were-balls” KUNIKIDA YOU DID NOT
ranpo is autistic
WHY THE HELL IS THE BOSS SO WEIRD ABT HIS KID WIHDJEBE OMFG
“i can’t hear the voice of god with you staring like that” — every catholic ever
nathanial hawthorn is a silly catholic
margaret basically being the daughter of a rich plantation owner in the 1800’s is so american
ranpo my silly
chuuya <3
q and kyouka are my children
osamu dazai my silly little wet cat autistic depressed suicidal maniac disaster bisexual husband <3
WHY IS MARK FUCKING TWAIN SO FINE OMFG THIS SHOW
lovecraft is weird. i like it. he’s accurate.
margaret x nathan??
chuuya and dazai are an old married couple. i love them so much.
“god i hate you” — chuuya to his husband who he loves very much
“don’t worry, buddy. i’ve got you” — dazai to his lover
“i’d expect nothing from you, my worthy adversary” poe to his bf
WHY IS POE FINE SOEJDIHENSHDBE
ranpo is so silly
dazai is a cool uncle to kyouka fuck you
akutagawa and atsushi are down bad for each other
why is scott fitzgerald a crossbreed between a dilf and a twink
cmon you two kiss each other already
is akutagawa down bad for dazai or just looks up to him
WHY IS THE WIFE NAMED ZELDA?? IS SHE A PRINCESS OR WHAT
i am OBSESSED with this show
never have i ever watched an anime with a shit theme song. i love bsd’s intro so much
hehe moby dick
if kyouka dies i’m killing myself /hj
welp guess i’m dying
akutagawa my silly <3
nvm not dying today. hey at least kyouka isn’t dead
dazai is akutagawa’s father figure sorry not sorry
lovecraft is so real for jumping in the sea
POE IS HERE WIHEEIHEIEHEUDHEHD I LOVE POE
RANPO KISS HIM RN KISS YOU TWO KISS
“but i prefer the women in my life to be under 12” E X C U S E M E S I R
RUSSIAN MAN????
CRIME AND PUNISHMENT DUDE HELL YEAH
IWJDUEBEHE DAZAI QUOTING ODA IEHRUEBEUDHWHDUENDJDJHE IM GONNA CRY AGAIN BYE—
DEAD APPLE IS AMAZING. I WATCHED IT ON 9ANIME. ONLY SUB THOUGH
READING THE TRANSLATOR STRUGGLE IS SO FUNNY. o7 TO THEM GOOD JOB.
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Techno: "Huh, I couldve sworn I saw movement inside the palanquin"
Phil, inside said palanquin: writing little notes on everything someone does that he doesnt like in his diary kicking his feet like a schoolgirl
Phil: "Revenge and a sonboy?? What else could a man want! Truly I have the most perfect wife <3"
All the other notes in his diary are just P+ K in a big heart. On literally every page.
Schlatt: Doing his damndest to make a good impression on Techno
Techno: "Kinda weird dude but he seems ok"
Schlatt internally: If I dont become besties with this fucking kid by the end of the day I'm gonna lose my job; I am SO fucking behind on my magic taxes!
Schlatt: trying to bond a bit with the new sonboy of the fae realm
Mielle: Ah yes, this is all about ME
Schlatt: "Bro I'm trying to build business connection here! Leave me alone so I can SCHMOOZE!!"
Schlatt: "I don't think your pops would like me giving you food, he'd probably kill me about it actually"
Techno: "the king can kill fae?? He never mentioned that before! That wouldve saved us this whole trip"
Schlatt: "Oh they're going down the 'surprise adoption' route huh. Don't worry about it then princeling!"
Schlatt: "Wait you genuinely don't know who the fae you made that deal with actually is??"
The royals: "Nope? Why would that be important??"
Schlatt: "You know what? Not my business. I'm just here to do the bare minimum and network with the newest sonboy of the realm. Not educate dumbass humans."
Schlatt looking at the palanquin: "What kind of ASSHOLE would leave their sonboy alone all sad? God that's such a DICK MOVE isn't it little princeling?? Wouldn't wanna get adopted by that guy!"
Phil, scowling from inside: This feels a bit personal
Phil: makes magic plant to shade his sonboy from the sun and heat
Felix: leans closer to techno so he can have some shade too
Phil: thin ice but I guess its ok
Mielle: steals techno's seat and makes him sit in the shit area she was sitting in
Phil: absolutely fucking not. eat shit and die.
Mielle: openly talks shit about who's about to be the prince of all fae
Fundy who just wanted to see the sonboy: Bro i gotta fucking haul ass if I wanna live to see another day
Puffy who needed to vibe check Mielle: The vibes? Rancid. I hope you have an AWFUL day. Matter of fact? I HOPE the queen kicks your ass. You deserve it.
Phil: They hurt our sonboys feelings! They made him so sad!!
Kristin: aww poor baby :( I'm gonna rip them to fucking shreds <3
Queen Chesil: where the fuck has my son gone he ran off but now we cant find him holy shit this is bad
Phil: Just turned my new son into a fae!! Might fuck around and get some more revenge later <33
Techno: "I wanna go back to my old family! I love them all!!"
Kristin: "Oh yeah? Name one good thing about Mielle. Quickly."
Techno:
Techno:
Techno: "That was so unfair and you know it"
Kristin: "You'll get over it. Now how about some cookies? You're far too skinny!"
The royals: "thank god the queen was willing to hear about our deal. Now we dont have to worry about that fae yoinking our second child!"
Phil, pulling the old switcharoo: yoinks their third child
The royals: surprised pikachu face
The royals when court is back in session: "Where the fuck is our youngest prince what did you do"
Kristin: "Yeah about that… you lost the custody battle on that one and since he's technically not inside your deal you cant do anything about it" :)
The royals: "Surely there's some way we can bargain him back?? This isn't fair at all!"
Kristin: "Ohh well the thing with that is we've kinda sorta already adopted him and turned him into a fae? Yeahh maybe you shoulve been a bit more attentive if you didnt want the boy to get snatched! We got his name fair and square too. No wiggle room at all on your end!!
The royals: "Thats literally so unfair??"
Kistin:"Have you maybe considered the fact that I literally dont care?? We're kinda fucking famous of stealing kids. Now shoo so I can have more sonboy time!"
Phil would do something like that. If anyone asks, he would call it a travel journal, but its just filled with vendettas and mushy doodles of Kristin. Little hardcore hearts drawn throughout.
Magic taxes asdfghjkll Yeah he would be. Fuck the magic IRS, he's from Magic New York.
Schlatt is there to do his job and insult mortals, and he's already done his job. And that insult thrown at Philza was INCREDIBLY directed. Phil was scowling the entire time. Very unhappy. Stay away from his new son.
Oh yeah, Phil didn't LIKE Felix trying to share the shade, but it was fine. Techno looked thrilled with his brother curled next to him. Can't be too mad.
Not eat shit and die, SMELL shit and die. Stinky plant for stinky children. Send a nice breeze so Techno doesn't have to smell it.
Fundy was not about to get merked because a bratty girl decided to try and one-up the kid literally wearing Philza's jewelry. He had a life to live.
All of your impressions are KILLING ME. Every single one of them. I am dead. Sorry guys, can't update the last chapter because this ask killed me via my funny bone /j.
There is a no refund policy in Kristin's court. Finders keepers. :P
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ECHOESSSSSSSSSSS
Python, i'm sorry, but i'm not sure if i'm gonna use you. Tobin is cooler and has a lot more stats on you cause of the base villager class. Also i'm pretty sure the max unit count is 10.
ALRIGHT BOYS LETS GO KILL!
Goodness. He looks so punchable.
Then again, thats kinda the point :p
Just realized that because hes blown up on my computer, Desaix looks like he doesnt have any pupils.
Spooky
Alm, two apples tall:
Damn, this bit is so versatile...
99% sure hes gonna defect. cause hes an ass.
See?
Cant wait to send you reeling on your ass Fernand...
...My VA sensors are tingling again, and its toward Desaix.
Okay... lemme scroll down here...
Spits out drink
Okay, what else...
A
WHAT
HOLY SHIT
THATS AMAZING
Talented man...
I guess this is what would happen if Igor served Narl-[I am Shot]
Anyways back to Fernand complaining about his previous job to Desaix
GET ADOPTED IDIOT
Love the word dastard, its like bastard but less!
Also new name alert!!!! Neato
Ohhhh i could make so many Persona Jokes...
WOAH CUTSCENE!
This guy get his armor made out of his hair or something?
YEAH I FEEL THE SAME WAY FERNAND WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE
Good lord this cutscene is pretty, thank god my emu has a pause function...
They look kinda cute together ngl
LOUD CHEERING!!!!
Thats the spirit!!!
He must have had a self-confidence arc off screen
Okay so uh im going to bring attention to the VA here, cause holy shit that read was so good?!?!?
like just before the line i heard him doing a small breath in-and-out to psyche himself up????
Like ough... the boy........
MEANWHILE
Damn, you know he is a Scary Guy when he gets a whole intro cutscene and also his own theme with a harpsichord. Only Serious Business with Berkut.
:3 Famous last words :3
Also Berkut's Theme is so fuckin good what???????
I see, so hes like
Evil Sigurd
Loves his wife and is evil
Oh boy I love being a fly on the wall!!!
Such wonderful things I get to hear!
I mean, birth is unknown, he could be a lost prince or something, knowing FE.
*sneezes in SMT IV*
@beantothemax I THINK I NEED TO TELL BERKUT SOMETHING RIGHT THE FUCK NOW....
Anyways Fernand and Berkut are Instant Best Friends out of their Classism. Im glad that Fernand found someone to be friends with
Clive divorce arc...
HUH so rudolf is the king of the evil place I forget its name, Rudel??
Allllrighty! that cutscene was pretty dense, so ill leave the battle and post-battle stuff for another ask.
REGARDLESS! Lets take a look at the battlefield!
...This is what youre using to defend the castle?
that is kinda hilarious tbh.
Thought there would be more.
Ohhh boy that looks like its gonna be Fun.
I'm 99% sure the game wants me to try splitting up my team, but i really dont like doing that. So i'll try not. But i mean, we have the power of the turnwheel if things get hairy, soooooo
Anyways, lets begin the fight!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
BERKUT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
RINEA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
youtube
PRIDE AND ARROGANCE GOES HARDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
me going insane aside, that is my favorite cutscene in the game tbh, like animated cutscene. I also love Berkut and Rinea if you couldn't tell, evil sigurd is a really funny description, you're so right for that
And also, you're so right, the voice acting in this game is so fantastic, best in the series imo. Just you wait until you hear more Berkut, his voice acting actually goes so hard
Clives wife consoling him after Clives husband left him for a bigger classist
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stupid motivation for me to start writing my fic. enjoy <3 (it’s long but i swear it funny)
James Potter was only one hour into his shift, and he felt like a zombie. The only thing he could think about was how much he hated the fucking sun. Ever since he was a kid he loved the sun, and his mother used to joke that he had his own little sun growing inside of his chest where his heart was supposed to be, but even sweet stories about his mom that make him cry at night weren't enough to distract him. It was currently 90 degrees, and he wished the sun would go fuck itself. He was hot, sweaty, tired and most importantly (in his order of importance) bored.
It's like Sirius could sense his best friend’s despair, because James was only wallowing in self-pity for one minute when he felt his walkie-talkie buzz with Sirius’ voice.
“Prongs, should we grab this kid with the blue crab trunks on and take him somewhere far, far away? He is so bloody annoying. Over.” He was talking about a attention-hungry boy who kept trying to splash water at Sirius. James tilted his head to the right to find that Sirius was looking at the kid out of the corner of his eye like he was the most repulsive thing on planet Earth.
“Please god yes. I’ll grab him, then pass him to you, and you run. Over.”
“Will you two please shut the fuck up. No kidnapping children. Do your job.”
“Awwww Mary baby, I haven’t heard from you in forever! over” cooed Sirius.
“Stop saying fucking over! You dont need to! There is literally no need!!”
“But how will you know when we’re done talking, Mary my love? Over” This time James was the one teasing her, sending a cheeky grin to the pool attendant's desk, where a very annoyed-looking Mary was sitting.
“Probably by the fact that no more fucking words would be coming out of your mouth!”
“I didn't know I could do that”
Mary sighed in a way that made James sure she was rolling her eyes. He didn’t even have to check. “Do what James” She sounded like an annoyed mother, tired of her children’s nonsense.
“Cum out of my mouth”
“HOLY SHIT JAMES! YOU ARE SO FUCKING ANNOYING!”
James heard Sirius’ evil-sounding laugh from across the pool deck.
“I’m turning my walkie off. If Minnie says something important, I'm blaming it on you that I can't hear it. Fucking childre-“
She was cut off by a sharp click, and James knew she had actually turned it off. He looked over and saw Mary glaring at him while putting her walkie down on her desk.
“Dude, people keep giving me dirty looks cause they can hear yall screaming from my walkie” That was the voice of the oh-so-lovely Marlene this time, who was sitting on the lifeguard chair by the kiddy pool.
“They can hear us?”
“Yes Sirius, everyone around me can hear you guys, especially when you yell like a fucking idiot”
James looked over to see Surius giving him a wide, mischievous smirk, before lifting up his walkie-talkie to his mouth and beginning to scream into it.
“SHE’S NOT A CERTIFIED LIFEGUARD! I HAVE NO CLUE WHO SHE IS! RUN AWAY! I'VE NEVER SEEN HER BEFORE IN MY LIFE! SHE WANTS TO KIDNAP YOUR CHILDREN! RUN RUN RUN!”
“PADS WHAT THE FUCK” James could barely hear Marlene’s panicked yell over the sound of his own wild laughter.
#marauders#sirius black#remus lupin#james potter#marlene mckinnon#mary macdonald#marauders fanfiction#fanfic#writing#its funny i swear#pls like this#imightcryifidontrecievevalidation#thank u
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Drunk Eddie and Robin part 2
Gorgeousgreymatter:
I think I might use the dice rolling thing to get Steve to try and beg Eddie to put pajamas on and go the fuck to sleep and Eddie just keeps trying to seduce him even more in such an endearing way that Steve would like to die
lettersinthesand:
:loveteeth:
kesbird:
YOU’RE A FUCKING GENIUS
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Because drunk Eddie would just pull fistfuls of dice from nowhere and Steve would just be like HOW
Turn him upside down and shake him and dice falls out
kesbird :
“Why do you have those???” “In case we need to play a stripping game duh now take your shirt off”
wynnyfryd:
drunk eddie who forgets they aren’t actually boyfriends yet because wtf? you’re so hot steve why aren’t we boyfriends???
lettersinthesand :
right
Buff Muggin:
I’m sorry but truly I cannot stop thinking about what was said earlier of Eddie just licking Steve’s neck, with the context of they aren’t even together
Gorgeousgreymatter:
that's what makes it hot!!!!
Buff Muggin:
Like that’s so fucking delicious yum yum
lettersinthesand :
Alternatively drunk Eddie who forgets they are boyfriends and freaks out when Steve says he isn't single
lettersinthesand:
RIGHT
kesbird:
Eddie - “aww my boyfriend’s so cute” Stev- “we’re not boyfriends” Eddie already crying “are you breaking up with me???”
wynnyfryd:
mid hand job “wait who are you cheating on????“ lmfaoo
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Why haven't I hit that yet Stevie
lettersinthesand :
JBFHDGSYDGD
kesbird:
THATS WHAT IM SAYING I lost it at that!
lettersinthesand:
Omg him using the word boyfriend and Steve chalking it up to being a joke
Gorgeousgreymatter :
It's going in the fic you all can scream about it later I promise lol
kesbird:
DONT WORRY WE WILL
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
It's like that one video where the guy is coming out of surgery and his wife is there and he's like"you better stop putting your hands on my chest I have a wife" and she's like "I am your wife"
wynnyfryd:
the pet names would get sooooo ridiculous, eddie’s poorly trying to climb steve’s back like a koala and he’s just slurring “stevie, baby, darlin’, sweetheart. light of my life. my sweet lil cinnamon peach pie banana nut muffin—“
“okay dude are you proposing or just hungry? get off me!”
wynnyfryd:
and then eddie’s like “yeah kinda” and fuckin bites him on the shoulder
lettersinthesand:
"We're married?! Holy shit, i hit the jackpot!"
kesbird :
Eddie- “I wanna climb you like a tree stevward” steve-“You ALREADY ARE”
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Jfjshhchd accidentally kinky biting you get me
kesbird:
YES BITES
ok but is it a steddie fic in this house without biting
lettersinthesand:
Joke until it isnttttt
lettersinthesand :
True
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
He do be biting
kesbird:
All I’m saying is that drunk Eddie would have a little nibble
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie] :
Just a taste
Gorgeousgreymatter :
He already had a lick so might as well
Buff Muggin:
Grey I am already screaming and I will continue to scream until the fic is done and I will still scream after
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
Steve is like "even if I wanted to, I'm not taking advantage of you while you're drunk and I'm sober"
"You mean this entire time I just also needed to get you drunk ? OPEN THE CABINETS THEN I KNOW YOU HAVE THE GOOD SHIT"
Disc:I don't condone getting someone drunk just to sleep with them
But this is fanfiction
Gorgeousgreymatter:
I also want Gareth to like deliver Eddie to Steve to take home with Robin from the party. "Sorry to dump him on you man but he will not shut up about you and I simply cannot hear these things"
"...okay...wait what do you mean things?????"
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
LMAOO
kesbird:
YESSSS
God that’s so fucking funny
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
Gareth, long suffering Gareth
kesbird:Like GARETG is beat red and it’s not even about him!
Buff Muggin :
GARETH AIDING IN GETTING STRDDIE TOGETHER MY BELOVED
Gorgeousgreymatter :
Image
rainbownerds:
Steve eventually says sth like "If I cuddle you will you go to sleep? If you remember this and still wanna have sex when you're sober, ask me again"
lettersinthesand :
Omggg and he thinks Eddie won't 😭
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Consent king Steve
lettersinthesand:
sexy
Oh i legit thought that was supposed to say consent kink and i was like oh relate
Gorgeousgreymatter :
I was tempted to write both tbh lmao
But the pun
rainbownerds:
Eddie waking up and slowly remembering everything but steve's not there. he feels like he's gonna die of embarrassment but then steve comes out of the shower
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
Eddie:you don't understand man, the absolute unholy crimes I would comitt to just bite his ass-
Gareth:OOOOOKAY WE ARE TAKING A TURN AT ELM AND IM DROPPING YOU OFF AT HARRINGTON'S he can deal with this problem
lettersinthesand :
LMAO
Gorgeousgreymatter:
"Listen man. Gareth. My dude. Do you know how mad i was when I found out what a good guy he was? And hot? I mean he's so fucking hot Gareth look at him!!!"
"I absolutely will not be doing that"
lettersinthesand:
Eddie: listen. LISTEN. He is. So sexy
Gareth: :yellsteve:
Gorgeousgreymatter:
true ally Gareth :slurrrp: :EddieSIMP:
Buff Muggin:
Eddie- I want to… MOUNT him
Gareth- That’s the third time you’ve said that since I walked over to you. It’s been two minutes.
wynnyfryd:
“but Gareth, his HANDSSS”
rainbownerds:
"Tell him, not me! I don't need to hear this!"
lettersinthesand:
"Gareth. GARETH. His ass"
Buff Muggin:
(Gareth is talking in complete deadpan monotone btw)
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
Eddie- gym class was never the same without him, and his sweaty thighs,and his-
Gareth - do I really need this band? I can just down myself in this cup of water it wouldn't be that hard
wynnyfryd:
gareth praying for his tinnitus to kick in any time now
lettersinthesand:
"Gareth. GARETH. You aren't listening."
"Oh REALLY"
kesbird:
Gareth who is just LEARNING about his friends kinks in a speed run absolutely warp speeding it to Steve so that he doesn’t have to deal with this
Gorgeousgreymatter:
"I really wanna touch his hair. Do you think he'd let me if I ask? Can you ask??"
Gareth- looking around for someone to beg to murder him rn
wynnyfryd :
“his teeeeth. gareth his teeth are so lickable”
“that’s it you’re banned from the tequila for life”
kesbird:
Gareth sees Steve walk out of the party bathroom or whatever wherever they are beat fucking red because Eddie has been saying all that to Steve and losing it
Buff Muggin (Alpha Porn Roach) — Today at 4:17 PM
Eddie - I mean, Gareth. I just want to taste him. Look at his neck. Oh, the things I would do to bite it.
Gareth - Do you think it’s possible to drown in a red solo cup?
Eddie - I don’t know man, that’s not what we’re talking about right now
Gareth - I’m very willing to find out
wynnyfryd:
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT
lettersinthesand:
Gareth slowly sipping his drink and turning away
Gorgeousgreymatter:
He's gonna knock on the door because everyone saw Steve and Robin go into the bathroom and Gareth is going to just be like "he's all yours, babysitter extraordinare"
kesbird:
ALSO SOME GOOD FUCKING SOUP
kesbird :
Exactlyyyyy!
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Because that's what Eddie keeps calling him and gareth has no fuxking idea what it means but fucking here u go
Babysit his ass
wynnyfryd:
“babysit his ass, apparently he’s into that too” lmfao
kesbird :
😂
Steve just- ???? But not having time to process because now he has two drunk octopuses
And Eddie is DELIGHTED to see him
Gorgeousgreymatter:
He's got two hands thankfully
Everyone watching Steve harringon the former king of Hawkins high leave with two people in his arms is objectively hilarious
Buff Muggin :
I both love incredibly supportive Gareth who tries to meddle in Eddie’s love life (to help him get the boy!!) and incredibly frustrated Gareth who hates how much Eddie talks about Steve
kesbird:
So he just gets practically tackled by a solid puddle of eddie
wynnyfryd:
gareth going through it
Image
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Robin getting a piggyback ride to the car (we were robbed of this in the Upside Down Steve would never even attempt to let Robin try to walk over those vines you cannot convince me otherwise) and just holding Eddie's hand
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie]:
Steve sends Gareth a fruit basket at the end of it all bc he doesn't know what else to do
Gorgeousgreymatter:
Which Eddie keeps swinging their arms and giggling
lettersinthesand:
ALL OF THIS
kesbird :
That is the most rich boy thing I’ve ever heard I love it
Gorgeousgreymatter:
30 bomb of beer and a post it that says thank you
Dude fruit basket
wynnyfryd:
that’s what they call their first apartment
kesbird:
Fucking iconic
Gorgeousgreymatter:
"If you puke in my hair I'm taking off your friendship bracelet and throwing it in the dirt, Robbie" -- she starts crying
lettersinthesand:
Robin is a crying drunk change my mind
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:25 PM
robin and eddie creating a feedback loop of sad wet eyed drunk idiots lmao
Gorgeousgreymatter:
I'd say she's a whiplash mood drunk lol
lettersinthesand :
Yeppp
kesbird:
Eddie is all - “I wanna tie you up Steve like a pretty little present 😌” meanwhile Robin is sobbing and Steve is having emotional whiplash
lettersinthesand:
Oh no now i had an angst plot bunny
wynnyfryd :
the sadness makes her nervous laugh until it turns to actual giggles
lettersinthesand:
Yes
wynnyfryd:
to the diary with you!! lol
lettersinthesand:
I feel like she's like me when drunk, which is super happy and intense until something happens and she's bawling her eyes out instead
Buff Muggin:
I definitely see Robin as the type to get really vocal to their friends about how much she loves them when she’s drunk. Like walking up to everyone she’s close to and being like “I need you to know that I am so happy we met and I love you so much you mean the world to me”
kesbird:
And the opposite is true too she’ll see someone she hates and BY GOD will they know by the end of that conversation
Gorgeousgreymatter:
"If you were a girl Steve I would marry you"
Cue drunk possessive argument between Robin and Eddie
wynnyfryd:
but then in the cold light of day steve tries to be like “that was really nice, what you said” and she’s all “gross, feelings 🤢”
wynnyfryd:
OH MY GOD a drunken passionate argument about who would be a better wife to steve
Buff Muggin (Alpha Porn Roach) — Today at 4:28 PM
Steve: Can we have a MOMENT for ONCE, ROBBIE?
Robin: Not while I am sober!
kesbird:
“My heart shrivels and dies the moment there’s no alcohol fueling it steve”
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:29 PM
"I love you too, Rob"
"Tell anyone I said that and your ass is grass Harrington"
"Might wanna get the lawnmower because you literally told everyone that already last night"
Buff Muggin (Alpha Porn Roach) — Today at 4:30 PM
“Tell anyone I said that-“ ROBIN EVERYONE KNOWS HOW MUCH YOU AND STEVE LOVE ONE ANOTHER (platonically) ITS NOT SOMETHING THAT NEEDS HIDDEN
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:31 PM
She tells everyone every single time she's drunk
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:31 PM
also quoting steve to steve while pretending not to be undying besties is just so good
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:31 PM
Like they all don't know
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:32 PM
nancy sarcastically over her drink like, “shocking news everyone, my girlfriend loves my ex more than me”
Buff Muggin (Alpha Porn Roach) — Today at 4:32 PM
You tried to “keep it under wraps” but those “wraps” were clear plastic cling film Robin. Everyone could see what was underneath it
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:33 PM
robin, starry eyed and missing all the sarcasm “i. love. him. so. MUCH”
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:33 PM
"But don't tell him!!!" In the loudest whisper whilst in Steve's lap
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie] — Today at 4:33 PM
THISSS
kesbird — Today at 4:34 PM
Even better if she stage whispers that directly to Steve lol
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:34 PM
eddie making the “lips are locked and the key is thrown away” gesture with the most sincere cow eyes
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:35 PM
That's going in the car scene
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:35 PM
argyle’s so high all the time that this actually is shocking news to him at every single party
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:35 PM
When her and Eddie argue over Steve
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:35 PM
He isn't even joking he is just as drunk and is 100% in on the seriousness
kesbird — Today at 4:36 PM
Covers Steve’s ears very badly for it too before Steve bats at him
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:36 PM
"But also ill fight you for him, Buckley. I'll fight you right now in this backseat!"
Steve: NO YOU WILL NOT
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:36 PM
Man Argyle as a background character in fic is so underrated
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:37 PM
kindergarten style slap fight commences
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:37 PM
Hdjshxxb this is gonna be so fun j have so many good dialogue ideas :loveteeth: :loveteeth:
kesbird — Today at 4:37 PM
:loveteeth: :loveteeth: :loveteeth:
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:37 PM
It will be a gift for all of you :EddieSIMP:
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:37 PM
:loveteeth:
kesbird — Today at 4:38 PM
Did I mention I would kill for you I’m just gonna leave that out there again because AHHHHHH
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:38 PM
Image
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:39 PM
...at Steve's house he has to go take care of Robin first so he takes Eddie to his bedroom and says STAY PUT all grumpy and Eddie says "I'll be a good boy for you stevie" and then Steve hurls himself into the sun
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:40 PM
Eddie is just. King of accidentally saying super hot shit
wynnyfryd — Today at 4:41 PM
AHHHHHHHHHH picturing him like, starfished on steve’s bed with his head hanging off the edge so he’s smiling upside down at steve
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:42 PM
Oh no he means it. 100% and that's what makes it part of Steve's agonies lol
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:42 PM
:loveteeth:
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:48 PM
...Steve trying to get Eddie to change clothes and he wants the yellow sweater but Steve's like you can't have it, I just gave it to Robin.
"Fine then gimme your letterman jacket"
'You can't wear that to bed eds it's not comfortable and I don't want you puking on it"
Steve is finally able to haggle and placate with the literal shirt he's wearing because it's the only one Eddie will agree to wear
lettersinthesand — Today at 4:48 PM
:loveteeth:
kesbird — Today at 4:49 PM
:loveteeth: :loveteeth: :loveteeth:
I’m gonna lose my mind dear god
At this point steve is taking a shower out of self preservation. Both to let off steam and also because Eddie was cuddling him he was no match
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:50 PM
...he's gonna jerk off in the shower and feel shit about it
kesbird — Today at 4:50 PM
EXACTLY
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:50 PM
But it's the only way he can cuddle Eddie how Eddie wants without dying lol
kesbird — Today at 4:51 PM
And then eddie comes in sober and sees everything through the glass and is like “whelp my time to shine lmao time to make good on some promises”
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie] — Today at 4:57 PM
MY TIME TO SHINE LMAAOODGUSGJFD
Steve having a crisis and Eddie just being inexplicably in love with him is my favorite steddie trope
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 4:59 PM
I'm seriously an excited puppy about writing this!!
Which means I'll get it done fast :ohreally:
hyperfixation powers activate
kesbird — Today at 5:08 PM
YESSSSS
Gorgeousgreymatter — Today at 5:09 PM
Also RIP everyone backreading this later
kesbird — Today at 5:13 PM
Oh i didn’t even think about that lol
I’m gonna try and start putting discussions on tumble again we’ll see how that goes
wynnyfryd — Today at 5:16 PM
re: this whole conversation akdkds
Image
Nix [Resident Eddie Kinnie] — Today at 5:19 PM
Tldr Drunk Bitey Eddie + DD Steve with a sprinkling of drunk lovey Robin and a dash of exasperated flustered Gareth
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╰ ☆ ╮𝐠𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞 - discord au ✰⋆
1.2k 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 | 𝚜𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎, 𝚏𝚕𝚞𝚏𝚏
𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭: "𝘉𝘢𝘣𝘦, 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘮." // "𝘓𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘱𝘴 𝘣𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘶𝘳."
𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖘: 5/5 𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘰𝘺𝘴 || 𝘺/𝘯 & 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱
I plopped my bag on my unmade and definitely in need of a wash bedsheets. I looked down on it, scrunching my nose seeing blemish marks upon my white sheets. Don’t ask me what it is, maybe dirt? Marker? Maybe the last drops of a monster energy drink that I chucked across my room into the garbage can. I’m not too sure what exactly it is to be quite honest. I’ve been so busy and tired, and the state of my bedroom defiantly showed it. University is hard, especially when it isn’t your only responsibility. With all the homework, my job and trying to keep my long-distance relationship above water it is especially hard.
But for once, the world was on my side. It was the weekend, I didnt have work and nothing due soon for school. I could get a rest, fucking finally. I walked my self over to my desk, and sat down in the chair. Unlike George and his streamer friends with these super expensive duel monitor and pc set up bullshit, I just had my laptop, and fuck Dream for making fun of me for it. I unfolded it, pressing the power on button. I watched as it slowly booted up.
Okay, maybe Dream is right but still fuck him.
I refuse to give that man the satisfaction of saying "I told you so." After waiting for a few to let it boot up all the way, I clicked through onto discord.
sex havers and y/n.
fucking idiots, all five of them.
looking over to the voice channels i saw them all in vc 2. I pondered, and questioned if I was mentally stable enough to listen to karl and quackity scream into my ear. I knew the answer was no but...oh, my finger slipped.
"y/n!" karl yelped with excitement. I felt a second wind rip through my body. that was the effect these boys had on you, if you think you're tired you're actually not.
"hi george." i said brightly, knowing it would offend karl greatly.
"hi hun." he said shortly, taking me off guard. i could hear him slamming on his keyboard.
"what are you playing?" i asked, going to click on his discord profile to find out.
"phasmaphobia, come save me from karl. he's been screaming the whole time in the lobby."
"hell no babe, you're on your own im sorry."
"for once, i agree with them." dream chimed in, making me roll my eyes and make a fake gagging noise at him.
dream has one of the kindest hearts i know of. we just fucked around with each other, but we could never seriously hate each other. he was like a brother to me, and no not one of those weird fucked up "i have a crush on my boyfriends best friend" things, but just a genuine great friend.
my thoughts we're interrupted by a loud scream from sapnap, and quackity and karl yelling run. I winced, smashing the volume down button on my laptop.
"alright nope! no no im done! i am closing the game." george said frantically, you laughed as you watched his discord status change.
"awe did the ghostie boy scare you?" i tease gently, testing the waters. with george sometimes, i could never tell when the teasing would be too much.
before he could anwser, i saw karls face appear on my computer screen making me giggle. he had the camera zoomed all the way into his face, staring dead into the camera.
"george..." he growled lowly, making you laugh.
"yes karl?" george asked innocently.
"SCREW YOU!"
the whole call bursted into laughter, i watched my screen go from only karl to karl and quackity.
oh dear god...
anytime alex has his camera on we knew we were in for it.
i watched quackity as he grabbed a stuffed pillow from behind him, and a pair of scissors off his desk.
"george listen- listen to me. this pillow-" he waved it in front of the camera.
"this is you. now this is a pair of scissors." he proceeded to wave them in front of the camera also.
"now george, i want you to turn your camera on for me."
george groaned in protest.
"why-"
"SHUT UP AND DO IT!" quackity yelled, i whined at him to shut the hell up.
I watched the screen grow again into three cameras on, butterflies filling my stomach as I saw george's smile. sometimes it just feels so surreal to me, how he gave me the time of the day really. when I first meet him he didn't seem like the type to date anyone, and if he did he would have been the type to forget he was dating someone and not answer for days.
yet he proved me wrong.
being with george has been one of the best relationships i've been in. he was kind and caring, and yeah he had a hard times being comforting but he showed his compassion in other ways. whether it be a meme he made himself to make me laugh, or a something as small as sending me a cat video link.
"y/n! turn on your camera." sapnap demanded, making you frown your brows.
"what! why? since when did you have yours on sap?"
"well if you weren't day dreaming ab mr gog mister over here you would have saw me put it on."
I rolled your eyes. I scanned my bedroom and made a face. It is a fucking mess in here.
"okay but dream doesn't have his on." i point out, knowing that wasn't going to help me.
"yeah thats because its dream." karl retorted.
"turn it on."
"turn it on."
"turn it on."
The four of them stared to chant, as dream laughed in the background.
"I fucking hate you guys." I groaned, hitting the camera button on discord.
Quackity placed the bear and scissors down, standing up out of his seat to lean closer to the computer screen.
"holy shit y/n! did a hurricane come through your room or something?" he laughed, half jokingly.
the boys knew they couldn't genuinely say shit, after all they are boys.
"oh fuck off. i would love to see your bedroom."
"i guess this makes me the organized one in the relationship." george says proudly, gleaming with joy.
the boys and i laughed at him, watching his mouth slowly open wide and a look of disbelief spreading across his face.
"what! why are you laughing?"
"george, you and i both know you are the least organized person in the world." dream told him.
i giggled watching georges reactions to their comments. his mannerisms were apart of his humor, the hand gestures and the facial expressions.
"no okay no guys please. listen-"
"guys pleaseeee" sapnap whinned mockingly, sending us all into laughter.
"screw off! babe tell them how organized i am!" he yelled through a laugh.
my eyes widened, fuck. you tried quickly to think of a lie to make him look stupid but good at the same time.
"last night he ate his fruit loops by color." i said, nodding trying to sell it.
"HES FUCKING COLOR BLIND YOU LIAR!" dream yelled loudly.
i covered my mouth from laughing so hard. holy shit. thank god i dont have anything to do tomorrow its going to be a long night.
#mcyt x reader#mcyt fic#george x reader#georgenotfound x reader#geroge fanfic#george fluff#george imagines#george x y/n#mcyt fluff#mcyt imagine#feral boys fanfic
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chronological thoughts of twd 11x16
(i didn’t get cake, let’s see what happens)
- omg i fully forgot about leah omg
- omg r they gonna smoke maggie out
- lance is certifiably insane
- timeskip again omg
- are they calling it act of god because of leah’s cult past
- 19 HOURS AND ONE ACT OF GOD AGO STOP WHY IS THAT FUNNY TO ME
- i have no subtitles i dont know what they’re saying omg hershel’s going somewhere he doesnt want to go to but IDK WHERE THAT IS
- aw maggie is sad :(
- hershel is so cute
- omg not the two face coin
- DID THEY HAVE SEX
- THOUGHT WE HAD A LOVELY NIGHT DIDNT WE oh they definitely had sex
- stfu i don’t want to think about physics
- stop eugene is actually so romantic
- DARYLLL
- omg they’re gonna try and ditch
- oh my god that guy punched through the walker
- wow he is so bald
- wait are they going to the commonwealth i don’t know what she said at the beginning I DIDNT HAVE SUBTITLES IM ESL IM SORRY
- literally what did maggie do to you she just didn’t want to join ur stupid communities jesus christ let it GO u white man
- omg elijah make your move
- OH ITS THE OTHER COMMUNITY
- omg maggie rlly went ‘thoughts n concerns?’
- wait hold on negan and maggie have a spinoff right how is that gonna work for negan and annie? is annie gonna die or smth?
- NO NOT MAGGIE STARTING TO TRUST NEGAN NOOOO NO NOOOOO MAGGIE I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU
- omg what she said before was RIVERBEND i couldn’t hear it through her accent i’m so stupid
- maggie rhee DOES have big balls. beach ball sized lady nuts, if you will
- i want annie and maggie to be gfs
- no ew not buzzing bugs ew i’m sorry i’m out
- gabriel is so fucking TIRED omg i feel you
- oh god are they gonna try and kill daryl and aaron and gabriel
- YES ACTION SEQUENCE
- damn they really hate team family huh
- YES DARYL FUCKING GUN WHIP HIM HE DESERVED IT
- hes so fucking cool daryl give me a chance
- god theyre so fucking cool
- OMG GABRIEL WITH THE SHIN STAB
- damn these stormtroopers really are storm troopers their aims r shit
- oh no hes going for the walkie talkie isnt he
- omg daryl fuck yes fuck up that bald headed guy
- DARYL GETTING THE LAST WORD FUCK HES SO FUCKING COOL
- “he ain’t here no more” WITH THAT ANGLE WAS CHEFS KISS
- i hate pamela idc idc idc idc
- that blue colour is fire tho
- they have so many pencils holy shit
- damn pamela rlly said fuck them kids its not my fault they’re poor
- is max gonna get caught
- please let her be the girlboss she is destined to be
- i forgot what she’s looking for omg 😭😭
- fuck it’s sebastian
- i hate sebastian so much
- is he drunk
- i hate this scene
- i hate him so much
- literally what is this bug motif i do not get it
- WHY IS THIS SHOW SO DARK I CANT SEE ANYTHING
- OH MY GOD THEY SET UP A BOMB
- damn leah rlly fucked that kid up huh
- is that jdm’s kid as a walker
- AHAHHAA LEAH SAID “damn that sucks ://“
- these bugs are making it hard for me to hear omg
- are they gonna kill hornsby
- omg the traps r reminding daryl of leah cause arent they the traps leah set up in 10x18 when he met her
- omg are they at leah’s camp
- oh oh oh oh oh nooooo
-i still don’t understand the importance of the bugs
- damn leah’s gonna have a lot of back pain from standing that way
- EZEKIELLLLLLL I LOVE YOU
- HELL YEAH WE’RE DOING THIS RESIST THE COMMONWEALTH FUCK YEAH
- oh no maggie its a trap its a trap maggie oh no
- oh so it wasnt a trap?
- oh no no music means TRAP
- omg she got leah or what
- damn leah got her but its okay maggie has plot armour
- omg another cabin
- maggie’s eyes match her jacket
- hes just going around touching blood like that damn what if you have a paper cut or smth :/
- THEYRE BOTH SHAKING AND ITS KINDA FUNNY IM SORRY IK ITS SUPPOSED TO BE AN INTENSE MOMENT BUT IM LAUGHING
- omg maggie fuck her up
- oh maggie is getting fucked up
- oh damn just a single gunshot
- NOO THAT MEANS CAROL NEVER MET LEAH
- good job daryl ilysm
- OMG DARYL INJURED HORNSBY FUCK YEAH
- hornsby lowkey giving joker realness
- damn maggie really got fucked up
- hershel said fuck negan ✋ but annie is cool ❤️
- max’s table is so tiny
- PAMELA MILTON IS LYING TO YOU DAMN RIGHT SHE IS
- NOOO THE COMMONWEALTH FLAG OVER ALEXANDRIA
- NOOOOO THE COMMONWEALTH FLAGS OVER HILLTOP
- LANCE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
- never trust a white man fr fr
- omg they’re explaining the bugs
- omg angela kang said it’s pathetic fallacy idiot
- SASHA
- NOOO NOT HERSHEL’S WATCH
- “that is a fight of pure hatred”
- okay but maggie was right it was fully leah’s fault
- “to him, there’s no choice to make. the choice is maggie” PERIODDDDDDT TEAM FAMILY ALL THE WAY
- “to hornsby, this is a no good very bad day.” stop angela is actually hahaha knee slap
- okay now that i finished season 11b what do i do with my life :(
- i miss carol too :(( </3
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Dress Codes,Nooky And Cock Blocks
Masterlist
Henry tries to be a white knight and realizes Kal is to smart for his own good.
Request/Prompt: Henry and Kal meets you from work after having a bad day. Playing with Kal to make Henry jealous. Shutting kal out for some nooky but Kal sits outside the door barking and howling.
Warnings: Smutty Almost Smut! Fluff, Swearing
A/N: so this has combined two ideas one of which is from the lovely @being-worthy This was going to be a Pooh bear chapter two but hasn't quite fit the bill. Anyway I hope you all enjoy. P.S I 100% belive Kal would be a little shit!!!
Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters @thatgirly81 @angelofthorr @iloveyouyen @sofiebstar @thefangirlsblog @harrysthiccthighss @loserrlauraa @tumblrnewby @isitmine @tinabean37
This was a fucking piss take your manager was an asshole! You huffed about the office still trying to process the stupidity he just fucking spouted at you. You moved to the ladies room phone in hand ready to vent locking yourself in a stall fingers poised to rant in a long ass text message but you froze. Henry was home well at the gym to be more specific. He was over the moon having just snagged the role of Geralt of Rivia and had been working tirelessly on bulking up for the role especially now that he was getting the dates for shooting. You paused taking a deep breath. No. You cant vent to him and ruined his day to. You growled and moved leaving the bathroom slamming the door thankful that you only had another hour, at least the prick had the decency to wait until the end of the day.
You through your phone down into the bag sitting at your desk for a few moments. You cast your eyes over the computer screen seeing the little bimbo...His little bimbo Stacey there was an office romance between your asshat of a manager and this little blonde. She ran about the office in small tight skirts hair immaculate and thick makeup smeared across her face and fuck me glasses that were an accessory not prescription like yours. She had a snug fitted blouse and pencil skirt on flitting about the office in some dangerous looking heels. More feminine? Was you supposed to jump up and say 'yes sir of course Sir, anything to keep this job sir' then flutter your lashes at him?.
Fuck that, and fuck this be more feminine bullshit, there was no written dress code and as far as things had gone you were doing your job pretty damn well and you didn't need heels to do it!
You scowled seeing the blonde slip out followed by your manager it mus be time fore their discrete get away a make out in the copier room...How original. You sighed clicking your mouse scanning through the next lot of appointments...No more today but there was a shit tonne tomorrow. You sighed getting down...Was your job really on the line over skirts, makeup and heels? Sure you were on probation but they couldn't sack you for breaking a non existent dress code...Could they.honestly you wouldn't put it past Dave he seemed to have some fucked up traditional views.
Your attention was quickly drawn down to your phone buzzing you smiled seeing it was Henry quickly tapping the notification.
'Bbe you still at the office?? Miss you! 😘😘' You smiled softly heaving a deep breath then began typing.
'Yep still here not for long though finish in 1hr thank god 😘😘 u 2 at the gym still??' You sent the text and got a reply pretty quick you smiled he must have left the gym to reply so quick. Your thoughts wandered a daydream of the huge glorious man puffed out and sweaty ugh yes that's what you needed right now your man to just ruin you fuck the stress and doubt right out of you!. Your eyes scanned the new text he had sent pulljng you out of your raunchy thoughts.
'No just left walking Kal around the park he got a bit excited need to wear him out, so have a good day?'
'😂 good luck with that. And its been okay...G2g shopping after apparently I need to dress more feminine😒😒 so will be home late' You frowned hearing the two love birds enter the office again wrapped up around one another professionally you rolled your eyes as the blonde pulled away from your manager giggling and made her way to the computer opposite you instantly reaching for her compact mirror trying to correct the smeared lipstick across her face. Your phone pinged and you looked down face lighting up a little seeing the anger emojis. Henry felt the same ass you.
'😡😡🤬WTF? wats tht sppsd 2 mean?' you cringed maybe you should have just kept your mouth shut but it was too late now you sighed trying to placate him.
'I need to wear skirts and shit...be an office bimbo no big deal🤷♀️🤷♀️ just get a few skirts thts all' you typed back his reply was immediate almost as if he'd been typing the same time as you. Wincing you prepared yourself for the worse, Henry was a very protective man and you knew he hated the whole gender roles thing.
'😡😡You dnt need makeup and shit!! ur gorgeous dnt u listen to that wanker!! Can't u leave early?? Say ur going shopping?? Just get out of there! please love dnt let this get 2 u!!🥺🥺 I love u, ur perfect!!😍😘😘😍' You grinned got flushing rereading the words a warmth in your chest. You knew that he meant every word. Stacey looked over with a smirk snapping the compact shut and pointed a false nail in your direction.
"Oh? Is that a blush? Who are you texting? Someone cute?" You flicked your eyes up to her you didn't have anything against her per say but you were different people, she was all Instagram, kardashians and trending and you were all gaming, books and cosy pajamas. You never really spoke to her if you could help it.
"Err yeah...My boyfriend" you admitted looking down seeing another text from him. Another round of compliments and reassuring words lit up your screen.
'I mean it bbe I know u! dnt beat urself up over it! Dont u let him get 2 u!😘😘' you smiled softly yes he did know you and he knew this had not only made you angry but also insecure. You thought you looked good at work you always made a point to look 'put together' but it wasn't enough?
"Ooo was that him again? You never told me you had a boyfriend! Is he new? How long have you been together? What does he do? Whats he saying!?" You gulped as she got up quickly scuttling around the desk as fast as she could in her heels and skirt.
"We've been together a few years...He's just asking me to leave early and catch diner with him but I don't think Dave would like that..." Stacey's face lit up and she beamed at you. She was happy to have something else to gossip about.
"Oh! that’s so sweet~ he wants to steal you away for dinner! You know I wish Dave would do that but he only really pays attention to me at work....So does this sweet mystery man have a name?" You looked up at her tilting your phone away a little so she didn't see Henry's on going threats of 'coming down there and teaching Dave some manners by ripping his tongue out his ass' you shook your head as you caught the ass end of a long text full of emojis...You sort of regret teaching him the meanings of them....Was that an eggplant in the middle?.
"Henry...His name is Henry and he's an actor" Stacey squealed cupping her face completely excited for some reason.
"Oh that's so cute! You know its always you shy ones that nab yourselves the boho guys...You know I always wanted to date the 'boho' type myself but never did, they were all to....Just not my type I like clean cut guys, you know ones who fill out a suit" You squinted what the fuck was she getting at? You schooled your features standing taller quickly and made your own little dig.
"Like Dave?" she flushed and nodded excitedly missing the whole sarcastic droll over your words. She clapped her hands completely missing the fact you were poking fun at the scrawny 'stud' sleazeball who Henry could easily snap over his thigh if he wanted to.
"Yes just like my Dave~! Ugh anyway do you have a pic...Come ooon! Let me see your man~" you sighed tilting your head to her...She was pretty harmless...And dippy so it shouldn't do any harm she didn't strike you as the type of person to watch Henry's movies so shouldn't recognize him. You nodded sweetly it was actually a little fun you rarely got to show off your man, most people who knew him knew you were dating. You twisted the phone eying the screen and froze seeing the last texts he sent you whilst you spoke to Stacey.
'Have you got out early??🧐🧐'
'Babe don't ignore me!😤😤 Is he still there!?😡'
'Woman you better answer me! Stop ignoring me bbe it wont help😤😤'
'Im serious y/n do I need to chat with him? Do you want me to help?🧐🧐'
'Look out the window'
"Oh hell no!" you huffed out under your breath then stood up scrabbling to the large office window Stacey followed you alarmed. You freaked and quickly opened the window poking your head out to scream at your sweet but very dappy boyfriend. As irritated as the texts were he didn't look it, well until you really looked he was tense and it wasn't just because Kal was puling excitedly.
"Oh my god?! HENRY?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!....GET OUT OF THE GOD DAMNED ROAD!!" lone behold when you looked down you saw Henry standing there with a huge bouquet of Roses and a bag you suspected held a box of chocolates, Kal was barking up at you spinning in circles and jumping up super excited almost dragging the huge man over in all the excitement. It would seem the walk was not enough to wear out the bear. Henry grinned up at you you heard Stacey from beside you gasp.
"Holy shit is that your boyfriend??" you turned to her and smiled smugly to her nodding then glanced back down to him seeing him quickly navigate the people bustling around the car park heading for the doors. You froze. You can't let him up here he sounded angry earlier...He'd kill Dave. You ran back to your desk quickly logging off the pc and snatching up your bag.
"Where do you think your going y/n?" Dave called after you you stopped seeing him there arms crossed giving you the filthiest look he could muster seeing your bag slung over your arm then there was the distinct buzzing of someone Henry at the door trying to be buzzed in. You pointed to the door opening our mouth to fake sickness or something but was interrupted.
"Oh Dave leave her alone...All the times she's here early let her go early for once, we don't need her anymore today and it means we get the office to ourselves for an hour~" your eyes bugged out as Stacey came to your aid fluttering her lashes to your manager. He heaved a sigh and nodded to the door in a 'get out of here' motion.
You smiled quickly darting out down the stairs to the ground floor seeing Henry standing there unimpressed finger holding the button down in one long irritating ring. You shook your head at him through the glass as he held the button.
You slapped the exit button opening the door and Henry tried darting past you into the building chest puffed shoulders ready to give your boss a piece of his mind but you caught the frightening man by his ridiculous bulging bicep. You spun with him digging your heels into the worn carpet.
"No no no! Henry no!" he carried on to the stairs dragging you with him passing you the roses and Kal's lead as the dog bounced around you both yipping like the over excited pup he was. Henry had hoped filling your hands would give him time to jump up a few steps out of your reach so he could have a chat with Dave about this whole misogynistic bullshit. Henry swore when you scampered behind him hooking your arms around his forearm and leant back, if he moved you'd drop like a rock and up the few steps as you both were, you'd hurt yourself. He stopped heaving a deep sigh looking to you.
"Just five minuet's babe is all I need! fucking feminine my ass he just wants to oogle your peach of an ass!! And that's not- that ass is mine!! fucking no one NO ONE fucking upsets my baby!" Your body flushed skin prickling at the shear alpha tone the possessive growl that seeped into his words made you tremble swallowing dryly you managed to shake it off and focused on the task at hand fucking could come later for now you needed to stop him from ripping your manager a new one. You moved crouching down bearing your weight down giggling at him as he still tried to thunder up the stairs. Kal helped to pulling at his lead it was a joint effort.
"Henn love?! I'll be sacked if you go up there and make Dave piss himself! Please lets just go home it's Friday I can find a few things over the week end for now can we please leave" he stopped and looked up to the brown ceiling and flickering light sigh he clicked his tongue then looked to you slowly with a heavy breath.
"....Fine, but next time I'm having him!" you smiled finding his protective side arousing your tummy clenching just knowing you big strong man could rinse the little twat upstairs made your pussy clench you always had a thing about strong men and Henry was the most physically fit you'd ever met. You somehow managed to coax him out of the door in the direction of home taking a detour picking up a Chinese on the way.
You giggled rolling around the floor with Kal. after a quiet dinner and snuggle with Henry you had been ushered away so he could do his nightly reading of his new script.You didn't mind at all you loved seeing him so invested in his roles. you caught a glimpse of the red roses sitting proudly in a glass vase on the fireplace almost blocking the view of the tv but not quite. You loved this, just being home with your favorite boys enjoy a nice quiet night in. you scoffed mocking kal who was pulling hard on the black rope trying to out witt you with quick flicks of his head, playing tug with Kal was a workout huge as he was he had the weight and strength to out match even Henry. You did not stand a chance just holding onto the black rope hoping to slow him down but he was full of energy today.
Henry was sitting on the sofa feet up reading his witcher script pen in hand as he read his page, one a night was the deal. But honestly trying to pull him away from this particular script was a hell of a job fair enough he was trying to memorize lines and scribble down alternatives in the margins. It was sweet how excited he got, he already knew the character in and out so could already tweak things around so it felt like Geralt. He was happy had been chasing the role for a while so you didn't mind that preparing for it was taking up most of his time. but you were still horny from earlier and wouldn't complain to a night of nooky. But alas Henry was drawn in by the script and you were trying to find other ways to distract yourself from the bubbling arousal in your loins, like playing with Kal. But that’s not to say you wasn't going to tease your man, there were ways to get his attention~
You smirked putting a plan into action bending lower wriggling your ass, craning back so your shorts rode up just that little bit more. Then once in place you squealed loud gaining the mans attention as Kal tugged dragging you across the floor growling playfully bouncing his weight back jerking you around, it was only then that Henry grunted in annoyance, your voice had been high he loved you keeping Kal entertained he really did, but sometimes he needed a little quiet. Especially when he was trying to concentrate.
"You know if I keep this up I'll have bigger muscles then you~" you giggled out a you tried to hold your own against the mighty bear. Henry smiled and watched shaking his head as Kal dragged you under his legs to the free space on the side of the coffee table. As much as he was trying to concentrate you could never get on his nerves for long, he just loved you to damn much. Henry frowned as you were pulled again wincing anticipating an accident as Kal was definitely getting to invested in the game.
"Or a dislocated shoulder" he commented as Kal did another particularly painful looking shunt and shook his head side to side still growling loud around the toy. It was then that he looked at you properly and what he saw made the man pause and suck in a breath air getting trapped in his throat at the innocently erotic sight. Seeing you bent over any time was a pleasure but here and now? Bouncing deliciously on your knees being half dragged about the living room added another dimension to the whole thing. Your arms and back stretched out low on the floor spine arched slightly, sitting with your knees tucked under you, the bouncing making your ass jump deliciously.
Two full ass cheeks peeking out of you short shorts as Kal carried on his jerky movements. You bit your lip grunting and tugged back pulling with all your might successfully gaining a few inches which Kal stole back and more making you yelp and moan as you were sprawled out on the carpet again. This time dragged up on your knees into a position he he spent many nights enjoying to his fullest. were you doing this on purpose? he wouldn't put it past you...Maybe you needed a fuck, a proper fuck.
Henry couldn't help the twitching in his groin, the first tremors as he got a front row seat to the two perfect globes of your ass seemingly clapping against one another with the shorts acting like a thong shucked up your ass. Fuck you wasn't wearing Knickers again. Little fucking minx. He lowered his feet to the floor now far to invested in watching you roll around in the tiny shorts. swept up in the way your body swayed taunting him. you turned to him with a sly smile and sent him a quick wink that he almost missed.
He gaped at you, you were doing it on purpose!! His script laid completely forgotten on his lap as he watched you turn back to Kal innocently dipping down low again shoulders to the floor stretched out taught in front of you face tucked into your arm as Kal fought you for the coveted rope. God...It had been a while since he fucked you like that. He licked his lips. Too long in the busy days since snagging the witcher role he had only had time for a two quickies. Two fumbled quickies in three weeks and they wasn't even that good. Well not his usual hour long foreplay teasing and touching then good few rounds. They were just a flurry of fast rutting motion's, less fucking more jerking trying to finish as quickly as you could just wanting that high. he bit his lip watching you watch him out of the corner of your eye definitely teasing him.
"Babe come here~" You froze and twisted your head back you knew that tone.Grinning knowing you'd got your way you looked seeing Henry eyeing you hungrily biting his lip tilting his head, legs spread wide making his thighs bulge in what should be a loose set of black shorts but actually became skin tight on this Goliath of a man. You flushed under the gaze but managed to hold into the rope not giving the still pulling pup an inch. His eyes were a dark ocean blue pupils nearly swallowing the color completely, you wondered how far you could push him. you pouted at him before teasing him further opening your legs wider letting the material of your shorts almost completely disappear.
"Henry...I'm playing with Kal-" he squinted at you then quirked a brow before shaking his head snapping shut the folder holding the script and let it drop to the floor by his foot with a decisive thump. You gulped. But didn't move instead you heaved back pulling the Akita across the floor.
"Babe...Come here Kal's had his playtime..." you rolled your eyes hearing the silent 'now I want mine' sometimes he was a man child. You twisted your head to him with a flutter of your lashes and cheeky grin.
"Well I'm playing with Kal you have to wait your turn-HEY? HENRY THAT’S CHEATING!?" You yelped as Henry quickly bolted up right and stomped on the rope whilst using his considerable size and strength to pull you up off the floor making you release the toy.
"Well that’s enough playing with Kal, time to play with me. I wont be cock blocked in my own house by the dog~" you giggled as Henry quickly began climbing the stairs laughing kicking your feet, watching as Kal stayed two steps behind rope in his mouth excitedly following his parents, you were all going to play!. It was only when the dog found himself shut out of the bedroom did he realize you were in fact not going to be playing with him anymore tonight. you could hear the indignant huff through the door.
You wriggled as Henry fell onto the bed with you wrapped around him slowly devouring each other with deep kisses tongues and teeth roaming each other. It had been a good few weeks since you both explored one another properly. Henry pulled away chuckling at the soft scratches at the door. Kal was not impressed.
"Kal go lie down! We will be finished soon" Henry called out and ignored the high whines and more insistent scratching at the door and leaned over you sucking at your neck decorating it as he saw fit leaving marks of red and purple biting his mark into the crook of your neck then lower tracing a warm wet train over your thin shirt. You moaned clutching his waist trapping him between your thighs using the grip you had to rock up onto him trying to ease the burning in your core.
"Oh whats this? Someone is impatient considering she wanted to keep playing with Kal?" His voice came out as a deep rasp making you gasp cupping his face.
"You treating me with your Geralt babe?" He smiled latching onto your ear rocking down onto you drawing out soft mewls. You vaguely heard Kals whines become louder barks out side the door hearing the dog jump up pawing at the handle of the door trying to break in.
"Oh you like?~" You sighed quickly trying to rid your tshirt panting feeling just how wet your slit had got, you were embarrassingly wet considering you hadn't even done anything yet.
"Fuck yes~ oh god its so-ah fuck its so hot Henry~" he pulled back growling in the new low tone you hadn't known he was capable of, his large hands helped remove the tshirt throwing it across the room and latched onto your tits biting and sucking slow flicking his tongue across a pebbled nipple as his hands stripped you of your shorts. he chuckled seeing the damp patch, your arousal sticking to the material in one neat line.
"Oh you really do need me don't you love~" you nodded to him whining when he pulled back grunting a growl biting your boob and sucking harshly. You both moved in tandem rolling around the sheets grinding ,rocking ,biting and grunting both intent on ignoring the pup crying outside the door. He would wear himself out and get bored. Well that was the plan anyway.
Henry finally pinned you and descended on your core like a starving man given the sweetest fruit. You cried out fingers in his hair unsure what spurred on this heated frenzie but would happily indulge him. One thing you loved about him is he was always up for eating you out, the man thrived on it! He seemed to get a massive kick out of feasting on you until you came all over him. You grunted as he suckled on your bud teasing and twisting his supple lips across it Nipping you began to loose yourself panting and jerking up into his mouth chasing a sweet release you hadn't known you needed and then you heard it.
A deep loud echoing mournful howl. Even Henry stopped frowning up at you from between your legs. That was new, Kal wasn't a howly dog, he barked and yipped giving off the weirdest groans and moans. But never howled. You both burst out laughing unable to stop it as the howls were all over the place, loud and quiet raspy and uneven like Kal was an apprentice learning on the job.they were less 'howls' and more 'how-wo-wow-wo-wow' It was clear this was his first time but bless him he was trying to be the wolf of the house. You panicked as he began to get the hang of it and patted Henry's shoulder. he was still chuckling finding Kals new found voice hilarious.
"Quick stop him! If he learns that we'll never hear the end of it!" You chuckled pulling the thin sheet over you as Henry swore and quickly slinked off the bed racing to the door opening it stopping Kal in his tracks. The Akita smiled panted a few breaths thumped his tail on the floor then collected his rope entering, jumping on the bed without a care in the world.
"Babe?" You asked biting the inside of your cheek trying to stop the giggles as Henry began to scowl at the fluffy bear sprawling out on his side of the bed a flush building up his chest settling over his face. He cleared his throat.
You and Henry watched as Kal moved dropping the rope by your hand waiting for you to continue your game of tug. You flopped back in peels of laughter at Henry's face. The man looked amused and livid at the same time as realization struck. Kal, lovable cute baby boi Kal had just played Henry like a fiddle. You didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the fact your boyfriend, your chosen mate had just been outsmarted by a dog.
"Yes love?" He said none to happy with how things had turned out, here he was standing at the foot of his bed painful hard on and there you were naked and willing...In his bed...With Kal. This was not the plan.
"I hate to break it to you...But you've just been cock blocked in your own house by your dog....For a game of tug!" You giggled as you threw Henry's previous words back at him petting Kal who was still fiddling with the rope trying to make you grab it.
"No shit...Can we still fuck? I mean he can have my side! I'm gonna be on top of you anyway?" You gaped at him as he rounded the bed fulling intent on rolling on top of you sliding home. You held up your hand to him.
"Nope! No way am I fucking you next to Kal!" Henry ignored you crouching over you trying to lay you back down to finish what he started before being rudely interrupted by the Akita now in bed with his girlfriend.
"Oh babe why not? this is painful, look I'm going purple...Besides you started it its your responsibility~" he whined trying to bat away your pushing hands leaning in to capture you with a burning kiss. You dodged anticipating his next move, his kisses were always a sure fire way to make you completely melt and give in to him. you quickly twisted away throwing your legs over the side of the bed placing your hands either side of his naked hips, pressing him back as he still tried to gain on you. you swallowed looking up at him meeting his lopsided grin, trying to ignore the proud cock swaying in front of you almost tapping your heaving breasts.
"How about the shower? He's scared of the bathroom since his last bath?" Henry snapped his fingers and clapped face lighting up as he patted your hands slowly easing them off of him.
"Fuck yes! Babe you are a genius!" He moved over and kissed your face making you bat him away and then he turned to Kal wagging a finger at him.
"And you my four legged son are a pain in the ass!" You shook your head patting Kal as he tilted his head he looked offended with his dads statement. You looked to the bathroom door as Henry's pert ass vanished around the door frame.
"Daddy didn't mean it baby boy~ you know how he is when he doesn't get his way...Just a spoiled man child~ he loves you really" Kal whined ears flattening as he heard the shower switch on. You patted the dog with a sigh and got up padding across the bedroom to the en suit.
"Don't worry baby you stay there and daddy wont get you in the mean old shower~" you giggled scratching his ears as he huffed in defeat. His daddy had got the better of him and the Akita wasn't pleased. He grumbled as Henry poked his head around the door frame wriggling his brows at you as you passed him getting a playful smack on the rear. then he faced the dog and stuck his tongue out childishly to the dog who huffed and turned around choosing to give you both a clear view of his ass.
#henry cavill fic#henry cavill x reader#henry cavill imagine#henry cavill smut#henry cavill#henry cavill x y/n#henry cavill fluff#kal cavill
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risky and freaky | kim namjoon
genre: smut
starring: namjoon x reader
synopsis: he has been busy with online meetings but you’re horny. what a risky combination
words: 2,730 words ( a very quick one )
tags: slight dom reader, handjob, bl*w!job, fingering, slight dom namjoon, cl*t tease, degrad!ng, unprotected s*x, hot!namjoon, submissive reader
side notes: namjoon is really hot for some unique reason so i made this after have been stucked with jk and taehyung fics for so long. actually, im a bad writer idont even know what im doing but tq so much for reading this :D
STAY SAFE EVERYONE. WEAR YOUR MASKS AND NEVER GO OUT IF YOU DONT HAVE ANY IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO.
**
A faint chatter sound can be heard from Namjoon’s studio as he is casually playing a sneak peek of his new composed song to his team through the Zoom meeting.
This has become his daily routine ever since the quarantine started in your area because of the damn virus. Honestly, you don’t really care about quarantine since you’re doing it with your boyfriend. That means you have so many hours to spend with him, doing things both of you love and plus, you could rest as much as you want.
Few days of quarantine seems nice and all but things turn into something different than you thought. Namjoon becomes extremely busy with his online meetings. From days to nights, he will do some sort of camping in his studio—completely forgot that he has life other than those damn composing shit. Especially his sex life.
You’re not happy, obviously. Rather than being sad or angry, you feel more needy and desperate every time he didn’t give you the attention you needed. Plus, Namjoon in that casual t-shirt and sweatpants? Of course, you’re horny. He is so hot.
You lean against the door—looking at him who probably can’t see you over there. But, surprisingly, he sees you.
He looks away from the screen and glances at you for few seconds while raising his brows before he mouthed, “What’s up, baby?”.
You don’t say anything as you help yourself from pouting at him. It’s really frustrating. Not gonna lie. He is there in one of the God-knows-how-many meetings he has done with the other members. The meeting seems chaotic and loud with laughter from the boys.
After few seconds, you come closer to him and lean against the desk—being cautious for not getting in the camera so the boys won’t see you in Namjoon’s shirt with only panties and no bra.
“Guys, I need some break. Go on without me,” he says as he turns off the mic and camera before he brings his eyes to you.
“What’s wrong, baby? Do you need something?” He places his big hands on your hip, giving it a small pat while he stares into your eyes with curiosity.
“I miss you,” you say. What a clingy bitch.
He raises his brows in amusement before chuckling.
“I’ll be done in 1 hour. I promise you okay?”
You frown.
“You said that 2 hours ago?”
“Did I?”
You nod with frowned face. So he wants you to wait for another hour before you could suck his cock? Hilarious.
“I really promise you. I’ll give you whatever you want once I’m done with these. Alright?” he rubs your thigh casually while smiling but little did he know, it’s arousing you in the wildest way ever. You get butterflies everywhere and the knot in your stomach is getting crazy.
Before you could say anything, Namjoon averts his attention back on the screen before turning on the camera and mic. He signals you to wait or probably leaves the room. The meeting goes back to the most chaotic ever—leaving you here with crazy arousal. What a torture.
He might want you to wait for another hour but it doesn’t seem that way to you. Not at all when you slowly get off from the desk and get on your knees. Quietly, you slip in between his legs under the desk. You immediately witness such horror look on Namjoon’s face as he looks down at you but nothing comes out from his mouth.
He can’t say anything, can he?
“I’ll be quiet,” you whisper at him and he seems speechless. Without letting him to protest, you trail your hand closer to his clothed shaft under that thick sweatpants. Namjoon almost jerks when you finally palm them inside your small hand. A familiar liquid feels coming out from your cunt at the touch.
“So big, your cock,” your eyes stare at the bulge—completely mesmerised at the size even this is not your first time touching or even seeing it. Namjoon’s eyes are glued on the screen even you clearly can see how intimidated he has become—all because of your touch. Of course. He likes this.
“You like this?” you whisper in a very needy voice while looking at him.
You keep grabbing, rubbing and touching the shaft but there is barely any whimper or such moan from him, making you want more. You need more.
His eyes become bigger when you reach for the strap of his pant and immediately pull them down. He catches your hand and mouthed, “What are you doing?!”. Completely ignoring him, you pull the sweatpants down until his bulge under the boxer finally come to your sight. Without no doubt, you grab them quickly and it’s making Namjoon to let out a small whimper, a very faint one.
“Huh? What’s wrong with you dude?” you heard Yoongi’s voice from the screen. Namjoon immediately turns pale. Holy shit, this is fun.
“Nothing. It’s cold here,” he makes up some weird excuse while rubbing the back of his head. You know he wants to look down at you but it will just make the other boys become suspicious so he just let you do whatever you want to do. That’s the best part.
Enough with the clothed service, you pull his boxer in such speed—making his huge cock sprung to your sight in a very delicious way. You could feel how wet your panty is.
They’re huge, long and hard—your mouth probably is going to sore so fucking bad after this. You stare at it for few seconds before you look up at him, waiting for his reactions.
You meet his eyes. They’re darkened. His pupil seems dilated. Gosh, he is fucking hot.
“Do you want me to suck it?” you whisper while giving a soft peck on the bruised tip. There is a pre-cum on it and you lick it clean—causing his hips to move slightly. Namjoon don’t give any reactions but he immediately runs his fist in your hairs before pulling your face closer to his shaft.
It’s crazy that he could keep such a straight face while his dick is this hard. You smile before opening your mouth to take his length into your mouth—completely burying his hardened shaft inside your mouth until the tip reaches your throat.
As you’re adjusting to his size, slowly, your head starts to move up and down—sucking every parts of his cock. You never take him fully before because of his size but this time, you try to taste every parts of the length and you’re not disappointed of it even you feel like choking yourself. He jerks his hip towards you, reaching your throat before you could hear another faint whimper coming from him..
Honestly, it’s not only him. You feel good too. Licking, rubbing and kissing the veins along the cocks—you try to help yourself from moaning no matter how good this feels like. You trail a finger to your wet clit and touch it —spreading the cunty liquid all over them. The damn meeting really makes you and him become this oddly quiet for something erotic. You definitely aren’t this quiet when giving or receiving sex.
Slowly, you pull down your panty and flinch a little at the cold on your bare pussy.
Wanting to see his reactions, you look up while clenching your mouth around the hardened shaft and pumping them in your hand up and down. The veins in his neck and arms are popping to the point you don’t really care about anything else right now. He needs to wreck the fuck outta you now. The saliva keeps drenching along your neck—making the wet sound echoes through the room.
“Baby.....,” you moan as the knot in your stomach is driving you crazy.
“Hsss. Babe, I—ugh fuck,” he curses, out of breath. It’s pretty loud for someone who is in a meeting but you don’t really care about it.
“Baby.....I want you inside me,” you mewls—rubbing his cock in between your hands while looking at him straight into the eyes. You never been this needy before, what exactly quarantine has done to you?
Without answering you, he suddenly stands up on his feet as he fists your hair harder before thrusting his hip even deeper into your mouth—fucking your mouth like an aggressive beast. A soft moan escapes your mouth as you try to catch up with his pace.
“Yes, yes. Take my big cock with that pretty mouth of yours,” He grunts in every thrust without taking the eye contacts off you Tears prick in the corner of your eyes but it feels too good for you to stop.
After few more thrust, you could feel his cock grow bigger and harder as it twitches inside your mouth. You know He is getting closer when he breathes faster and a small breathy grunts come out from his mouth.
“Do you want to taste my cum, baby? Are you going to swallow it all, huh?” his deep voice is echoing throughout the room—making it’s hard to not moan at the pleasure.
You nod softly. He smiles before he takes his shaft out of your mouth with a loud pop—rubbing the length for few seconds as his seed is plastering on all over your face and mouth as you already stick your tongue out like a puppy. Namjoon is twitching when he cums—probably feel really good the oral you just gave. You lick every drops of the white semen coming from the tip—cleaning them by sucking the cock for one last time.
“Fuck, you’re freaky, do you know that?” he says in breathy voice—running a hand through his hair while his dick still few inches away from your face. Still hard as fuck
“Are your members okay with us moaning just now?” you ask, innocently while still licking his cum on your lips. You know he’s got them camera and mic turned off.
His jaw is clenched, showing off the veins along his neck. He is mad, huh.
“Get up,” he commands seriously and in a blink of eyes, you did what he told you to do so. The crazy thing is you never want to look away from his sexy eyes.
“Turn around and spread your legs wide,”
Hiding a smile, you turn around so you’re facing the screen and it’s immediately making you blush when you see his friends on the Zoom meeting. They surely can’t see what both of you are doing now but this honestly feels like they are looking at you right on the eyes while you do the nasty deed.
Before you could say anything, a scream escapes your mouth just right after he thrusts his length deep from behind inside you—stretching your walls with the throbbing cock with no mercy. Namjoon don’t even let you to adjust with his size as he starts to move back and forth—forcing his hip onto you. Your eyes are rolled back at the sensation. He is fucking huge inside you and the way his cock fits in your cunt—Holy shit, this is heaven.
“Mmmm—nghhhh,” you moan through gritted teeth as he found your sensitive spot and abuse it over and over again. Nails are clawed into the desk, your body arched in such desire. This feels so good, just like you wanted.
“Moan as much as you want. I know my big cock is stretching your pussy so well,” he whispers in your ears before you could feel his pace quickened. Both of you are grinding on each other, making you tremble inside his embrace. You throw your head back and scream his name.
“Namjoon....Nghh, like that, mmm,” you beg, holding on to his firm arms for support as he bangs himself inside you. Your body bounce every time he pumps himself inside you.
“You’re a fucking nasty slut. Sucking my cock during my meeting like that,”
“Yes!! Oh fuck,” you scream with eyes closed. Breath hitched, legs trembled, mouth opened.
“You want them to know you’re getting fucked tonight? Huh? You want them to see how good I fuck you?” he bites your neck, not even slowing down his pace. Namjoon reaches the mouse to turn on the camera but you stop him immediately.
“No, don’t do that,” you say in between moan and whimper. He chuckles.
“You don’t like it? What do you want then?” he pulls your hair slightly while the other hand is on your hips to synchronise your pace with him.
“You,”
“This?” he grunts as he thrusts even deeper—giving your ass a few slaps as he grope your tits in his other big warm hand, pinching the nipple to bring another scream from your mouth. Namjoon stares at his length getting burried in your pussy while biting down his lower lip. He probably feels as good as you do.
“Look at how dirty you are. Begging for my cock like a nasty kitten,” he bites his lower lip—hiding a satisfied smile.
The slapping sound and your lewd scream are filling the room along with the chatting sound from the boys in the meeting. It’s a weird combination but none of you cares about it.
“Your dick feels amazing in my pussy. I—fuck, Namjoon. Yes, yes, yes!!! like that,” you scream when the tip reaches your walls. Holy shit.
Sweat pricks on your body. Your vision goes blurry. Namjoon brings you closer to him as he finds you stumbling on your feet.
Sticky liquid keeps dripping down your thigh before your legs start to feel wobbly as you are reaching for the climax. The knot in your stomach is twirling like crazy, wanting to release the cum from the cunt. You clench around him—he groans out loud before putting one of his finger into your mouth. Like a good girl, you suck on them long fingers.
Both of you moan. Like crazy.
“Gonna cum. I’m gonna cum, Namjoon. Shit, I’m cumming now,” you scream with tears prickling on your eyes—grinding on him even more to increase the pleasure so that you can cum in peace. He is pumping into your sweet spots more and more, not giving a fuck at your begging.
“Cum on my dick, slut. Coat me with your cum like you always do,” his voice is calm yet aggressive to the point you feel nothing but him.
And you did as he told you. Body keeps flinching everytime the sticky juice coming from your pussy—coating every part of his long dick. He groans at the warm feeling before he starts to fill your pussy with his semen—the same one that fills your mouth.
“Fuckkkkk, this is good,” he grunts.
Both you and him moan out loud—taking each other’s seed before he pulls out of you. Silence fills the room as you both catching some air from the intense fuck you had as you lean against his chest.
“Baby...” you call him, almost losing your voice.
“Hm?” he hums against your neck.
“They’re waiting for you,” you chuckle while looking at the screen. He shakes his head.
“I’m not done with you yet,” Namjoon mumbles as he shuts down his laptop without saying anything to the boys before he swings you across one of his shoulder—causing you to scream in surprise. Your pussy is still throbbing.
“I’m gonna fuck you all night baby. So hard that you don’t even know how to walk tomorrow,”
#namjoon#kim namjoon#namjoon smut#rm smut#seokjin#jin#suga#yoongi#j-hope#hoseok#jimin#jungkook#taehyung#bts smut#bts#bts imagine#jungkook smut#taehyung smut#jimin smut#kpop#rm
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[SUMMARY: Rick's daughter Melody cant stop thinking about Negan. The two developing a connection before she learns the truth of what Negan had done to Glenn.]
Smut
Negan and Melody PART TWO
It had been about two weeks since you saw Negan. Two whole weeks yet you couldnt stop replaying what happened between the two of you. Sucking your teeth you cursed at yourself for even continuing to think about what happened. You werent interested to see anymore of Negan, at least that's what you tried convincing yourself. It was hard fighting the thoughts in your head, just how much control you had over Negan for that moment until he climaxed. With a sigh you walked out and decided to help Michonne that day with her daily duties. As you walked past where Negan was held captive, you couldnt help but keep your eyes on the door not having any idea your father would catch you. This was the second time now that your father caught you looking at the jail cell in a strange manner. Brushing it off he went about his day as you did.
Negan continued to wake up each day with a hard on, thinking of you and what you did. Truth be told it was hard for him to ask you to leave when he did, Negan felt comfortable having conversation with you. He appreciated that you didnt treat him like an animal locked away, although you didnt know why he was in the cell, the sight of him in the cell didnt make you treat him any different. He wondered if any bit of you would think of coming by to see him, he wondered if you thought about what you did to him. He replayed it in his head only in his head it didnt end with you leaving. He lay in his bed when he suddenly heard the voice of a man calling your name through his window.
"Hey Melody, wait up!"
You turned to find Fred running towards you. Fred was one of the new guys who entered Alexandria within the last month. Since his arrival you noticed how much he looked at you and how much he would try to talk to you. Being distracted in your head with the whole Negan situation you didnt realize that maybe this guy had a crush on you.
"Where you headed to?" Fred asked out of breath as he caught up to you.
"I'm just going to check on the kids, sometimes I help Anne with the classes."
"Maybe I can accompany you."
Negan frowned as he overheard Fred's suggestion.
"I mean, sure if you want to." You smiled at Fred not having any idea the two of you were being heard.
"You look really cute in that shirt by the way." Negan sat up at Fred's compliment and looked up at the window. He wondered if you were wearing that same black top you had when you came to see him. The same black top that showed just enough of a peak at your plump breasts. He made a dirty look knowing this man was probably thinking the same as him when he saw you in that top. Negan stood up on top of a box and put his ear closer to the window continuing to hear the conversation.
"Thank you," you giggled looking down at your shirt suddenly remembering this had been the same top you wore when you saw Negan. You remembered how he couldnt get his eyes off it.
"You alright?" Fred asked noticing you blank out in thought.
"Yeah of course. Lets go, Fred." You smiled before walking off with him.
"Fred huh" Negan mumbled to himself as he stepped down. It striked a nerve of jealousy in him that he didnt understand. Negan didnt even know who Fred was. He lay back down with his hands behind his head brushing off the matter, well he tried to at least. He knew he had asked you to leave but he wondered if this new guy Fred is what kept you from even trying to see him.
The next day you came outside to find your father and the others holding up the fence in the entrance. A few walkers attempted to make their way in but thankfully they were stopped.
"Melody!" You looked to the side and found Gregory, the same guard that let you in to see Negan the last time calling for you.
"Melody, I need your help-" he suddenly handed you a tray of food and threw a set of keys at you.
"What?"
"I need you to give Negan his food, I have to help with the entrance."
"What? I'm not going in there, my dads not even calling for you." You insisted with confusion.
"Listen they need a hand from the outside, now unless you want to do that just take Negan his stuff I'll be back quick." Before you could respond Gregory ran off making you sigh. The last thing you wanted to do was see Negan. Looking around to make sure nobody would see you, you quickly snuck inside and locked the door behind you. You could feel your heart rate go up as you walked down the dark hall. You found Negan sitting back against the wall reading a book. The sound of you entering made him look up and raise his brows.
"Well look who's back," he spoke in his usual cocky tone as you rolled your eyes.
"Dont flatter yourself, Gregory asked me to do this favor." You shoved the tray under the cell as he put the book down and stood up.
"Now dont tell me you dont want to see me." He teased as he stepped close to the bars.
"I don't." You snapped back.
"Why not? Your boyfriend Fred might get jealous?" He grinned.
"Hes not my boyfriend-wait how do you even-" Negan interrupted you with a deep chuckle.
"What the hell do you care anyways?" You squinted your eyes at him.
"Mmmm..I thought a new man caught your eye, sweetheart."
"Again. What the hell do you care?"
"Maybe I missed you." He slowly licked his bottom lip with a smile. You scoffed rolling your eyes in response.
"I mean I know I told you to leave, doll but shit you broke my heart. Thought youd be back."
"Well you thought wrong." You crossed your arms confidently until he squinted his eyes at you.
"You've been thinking about me too, havent you?" He teased.
"N-no, I havent actually." You lied and you werent even good at it.
"You sure? You don't think about what you did to me? Or better...what I wanna do to you." He spoke seductively watching as your lips parted.
"Because I do. I think of it every fucking day."
You took a deep breath knowing damn well that's exactly what you had been thinking since you last saw him.
"Why are you telling me this?" You whispered slowly.
"Cause I want to fucking see you." He blurt out leaving you silent. Truth was, you wanted to see him too but did your best to fight the thought out of your head.
"Do you?" You asked when you suddenly heard the door open behind you and your heart sunk.
"Melody, what the hell are you doing here?!"
You turned to find your dad angrily walking towards you.
"Dad-" you gasped.
"Oh shit..." Negan muttered to himself with a smirk as he realized who Rick was to you.
"I want you out of here-"
"Dad let me explain!"
"Go to your room. Now!" He yelled so loud it made you jump. Negan frowned hearing you tear up before you ran out of the room leaving only him and your father alone together.
"So that's your daughter, huh?" Rick looked at him with intense eyes afraid to even know what he was thinking of you.
"Pretty girl-"
"Watch your mouth!"
Negan couldnt help but laugh in response, knowing the daughter of the man that has him locked up was the one that jerked him off.
"Its no wonder she likes me-"
"She doesnt like you, dont speak of my daughter."
"Oh but I think she does." Negan responded in a cocky manner.
"Your daughter and I actually got to know each other quite a bit and I think she likes that I dont treat her like a fucking kid. I mean shes not...shes a whole lotta woman." A slow grin appeared on Negans face making Rick bang his gun on the bars.
"I'm going to warn you, when it comes to my daughter you really dont want to cross me." With that being said Rick left the room and ran to find you.
In your room sitting on your bed nervous you knew you would be hearing from your father any minute.
"Stupid Gregory," you muttered to yourself wondering why he let your father get back to the prison first. As you sat staring at the floor your father barged in angrily. Rick stood in place for a moment staring down at you disappointed before he began to speak.
"You're going to have a curfew from now on."
"Dad. I'm already locked in Alexandria-"
"How long have you been seeing Negan?" He cut you off bluntly.
"I havent...today was the first time." You lied making him sigh.
"Melody you have to understand that man is dangerous, hes locked up for a reason."
"And you cant even tell me why." You shot back crossing your arms. Your father stood silent staring down at you, he couldn't bring himself to tell you the truth.
"Melody I'm your father and you should just trust me when I tell you something. That's that. Now stay in your room." He slammed the door as he left making you want to pull your hair out. Angrily you lay back in bed and sighed just wanting the day to be over.
Two days passed and you hadn't really spoken to your father, you had nothing to say. Sitting on your porch you saw your father getting a truck ready to go on another run. The supply run would last over night with the destination being far but they knew where to go. You looked over at where Negan was held and saw Eugene standing in the front before realizing your father was watching you with a warning glare. With a sigh you stood up and went back inside.
Negan overheard Rick and a few others were going to get a few supplies. Yet, he was sure he wouldnt be seeing you for a while now, he knew you would be too afraid to. Eugene came inside to check on him and Negan could always tell how nervous the job made him.
"I gotta ask," Negan began to speak making Eugene tremble.
"Why you out of everyone out there?"
"Wh-what do ya mean?" Eugene responded hesitantly when Rick suddenly called for him as he was making sure Negans cell was locked.
"Be right there!" Eugene yelled out before nervously running out being thankful that something got him out of there. Negan chuckled leaning on the bars when the cell suddenly opened.
"Holy shit.." Negan whispered.
"Eugene I need you to help Anne till I get back."
"Well what about Negan?" Eugene asked worriedly.
"He'll be fine. Doors are locked, he wont know you're not in front. Just do me that favor till I get back alright?" Eugene nodded quickly before Rick jumped in the truck and drove out of Alexandria.
Negan heard the car drive out and stepped on the box to get closer to the window to hear who was around. It sounded very quiet outside. Slowly opening his cell door he made his way down the hall. Putting his ear to the door to hear who was outside he slowly turned the knob. Surprised that it was open he let himself out. Negan could've easily used this chance to escape, he could've used this chance to be free but, Negan wanted to see you. Looking to his right he was lucky to catch you going inside the house so he knew right where to go.
Negan hid behind the houses as he snuck his way closer to you. Stopping a few feet away he looked up and noticed you by your window. Distracted completely by the sight of you taking off your top, he couldn't help trying to get a peak. Rushing to the front of your house as no one was around, he quietly snuck inside gently closing the door behind him before making his way upstairs.
Negan could hear you humming to yourself as he slowly went up the stairs. He could hear you coming from the left side of the house. He looked to see your door was cracked and slowly moved closer to it. Through the crack he saw you still with your bra on brushing your hair.
As you brushed your hair all you could think about was Negan. Why the hell did that man have such a hold on your mind? You abruptly stopped singing getting annoyed at the thought of the situation. How he asked you to leave last time then suddenly had the nerve to say he missed you.
"Negan missed me huh," you scoffed not knowing you were being heard.
"So why the hell ask me to leave, asshole?" You stood up throwing your brush on your dresser before reaching behind you and unclipping your bra. The second you removed your bra Negan let out a deep breath at the sight of your round and plump breasts. He could picture them filling up his large hands, he could feel himself getting hard at the thought. You sighed as you suddenly spaced out thinking about that morning. Thinking about how much you actually wanted to suck on his cock. Thinking about how he wrapped his hand around your throat...then touched your breast. Without realizing it you found yourself caressing your breasts.
Negan practically almost lost his balance at the sight. Keeping himself composed he began to rub his crotch area as he watched you twist your nipples between your fingers.
"Oh.." he whispered softly as he watched your hands touch yourself all over, your neck and shoulders. Your eyes closing as you bit your bottom lip and squeezed your breasts. Negan was breaking a sweat watching you, his breathing was heavy as he focused on every part of you. He tried his best to hold himself back but he couldnt control himself any longer and opened the door to you room.
Negan walked inside making you scream as you stumbled back against the wall. Covering your breasts with your hands you couldnt believe Negan was in your room.
"What...h-how.." you gasped in shock as Negan smirked, slowly closing the door behind him and locking it. You couldnt find the words to say, had he escaped? What the hell was he doing here?
"Come on, arent you glad to see me? I sure am glad to see you." He stepped closer as you stared at him in shock. Licking his lips with a twinkle in his eyes he looked down at your hands covering your chest.
"You're gonna put those hands down for me, sweetheart?" You could see he was aroused just as you were. Slowly but surely you obliged putting your hands to your side. He looked down at them licking his lips before looking back up at you and grinned.
"Thats a real nice fucking rack."
Negan chuckled at your shy response he could tell you were nervous and shocked at the sight of him.
"You wanna share with me what your fine self was just thinking about?"
"You saw me...how long were you there?" You finally spoke hesitantly.
"Long enough. Now tell me, what exactly were you thinking of about big ol' Negan here." He slid his tongue between his teeth as he looked down at you excitedly.
"I...um...Negan..." you laughed nervously making him smile, he actually thought it was kinda cute.
"Let me help you out." He blurt out before clearing his throat.
"Were you thinking about this?" Negan suddenly took your nipple gently between his index finger and thumb, twisting it lightly. You gasped looking down at what he was doing as he began to now do it with the other hand as well.
"Negan.." you whispered before he leaned down and took your nipple in his mouth. You moaned throwing your head back as you held on to him, the feel of his tongue flicking around your nipple making you weak. Negan began to pull your pants down as he continued to tease you knowing exactly what he wanted to do to you.
"I dont know if we should right now." You whispered knowing damn well you didnt want to stop. Negan stood up straight and began taking off his clothes as he stared down at you.
"Come on, sweetheart. No ones around to stop you. Plus..." he walked backward towards the bed and pulled you back on it with him.
"I still owe you, remember." He winked looking down at you before leaning in and kissing you. It felt so good feeling his body lay beside yours. Negans hand caressed your body as he kissed you. He placed himself behind you as he kissed the side of your neck and shoulder. He lifted your leg up and began touching your clit. You moaned leaning back against him feeling the tip of his cock press against your ass.
"Mmmhmm..I know you've been thinking of me." He whispered against your ear feeling how wet you already were.
"Dont worry, I'm gonna do exactly what you want me to do." Negan continued rubbing your clit as you felt him thrust his pelvis against you. You could feel the tip of his cock teasing your entrance and you wanted more. He nibbled on your ear as you felt him slide his cock between your lips teasing you before unexpectedly sliding himself in. You moaned as he closed his eyes leaning his face at the soft curve of your neck.
"Holy fucking christ.." he whispered out of breath. The man had been craving the feel of pussy for months and yours being the first one he had felt in a long time he fought himself to not explode. He struggled fighting the intense urge to cum inside you. It was all he could think of doing.
"Negan...that feels so good," you moaned leaning back against him.
"I know baby," you could hear him having trouble to speak and through it all he didnt stop rubbing your clit. It was to the point you felt a giant burst of pleasure take over you that you moaned loudly pushing away from his cock. Negan felt you squirt all over him and cursed under his breath.
"Oh fuck yeah-" he muttered not expecting you to orgasm the way you did. You collapsed against him as he slid his cock right back in making you gasp. Negan held you close his hand grabbing your breast as he continued to fuck you when suddenly there was a knock on the door. Negan and you both froze, his cock still in you before you took a deep breath and answered.
"Who is it?" You spoke in a shakey voice.
"Melody, it's me Fred. You ok?"
Negan chuckled low kissing your shoulder before he began to move again making it harder for you to speak.
"Y-yes...why?" Negan got a rise out of fucking you while knowing the guy who was interested in you was just outside the door.
"I thought I heard you yell from the window, I got worried. I just wanted to check on you." You couldnt respond as Negan purposely began to move faster, more than anything you wanted to cry out.
"Melody?"
Negan right away covered your lips with his hand knowing you both were about to cum as he thrusted as fast as he could.
Your eyes rolling back, Negan felt your body shake against him as you whimpered right as he pulled out, barely in time.
He let go of your mouth as he jerked himself off on your inner thigh biting down on his bottom lip as he did. The amount of warmth you felt cover your thigh as you felt his body jerk against you made you moan softly. Letting out a deep breath he lay back, you panted beside him.
"Melody?"
"Yes!" You yelled out without meaning to out of breath.
"I mean, yes. Sorry I'm fine." You cleared your throat as Fred stood by the door confused.
"Ok...I'll see you around later. We can catch up if you want."
"Sure, Fred." You just wanted him to leave, you struggled to catch your breath with Negan before finally hearing him walk down the stairs.
"Fucking shit that fuck is annoying." Negan stood up wiping the sweat off his face with his tshirt as you began to clean yourself off. You didnt respond as you began to get dressed making Negan turn to look at you as he buttoned his pants.
"You're not going to actually see him later are you?"
"I dont know. Maybe." You responded without looking his way making him sarcastically chuckle.
"What do you care?" You turned to him making him frown.
"Are you still giving me attitude after how I just fucked the shit out of you? By the way, holy fuck I had no idea you were a squirter."
"Neither did I." You responded making him raise his brows.
"Well look at that, fucked you good and made you squirt. You're gonna stop being mad at me or what?" You sighed, you couldnt stay mad at him..not with that look.
"I guess I will." You smiled rolling your eyes as Negan stepped close to you and leaned in for a kiss. He grabbed your face kissing you passionately when you suddenly heard the door slam downstairs.
"Who was that?" You gasped hearing someone loudly run up the stairs only terrifying you even more.
"Melody open the damn door!" You gasped bulging your eyes out hearing your dads voice.
"Shit." Negan muttered as Rick attempted to open the door.
"What the hell is he doing back, he was suppose to be gone for the night?" You whispered in a panic.
"Open the damn door, I know you're not alone in there!" Your father yelled as you looked up at Negan.
"Just open it, it'll be ok. I'll deal with it."
Hesitantly and fearfully you unlocked the door and opened it to see your father immediately turn to Negan.
"Now Rick, before you say-" before Negan could finish Rick ran in the room and speared him to the floor.
"Dad!" You screamed as he punched Negan before Negan quickly turned him around.
"Dad wait!" You screamed watching in shock. Rick stood up out of breath angrily wiping the blood from the corner of his lip.
"You wanna take advantage of my daughter? I warned you not to cross me!" Your father yelled as Negan stood up out of breath.
"Hes not taking advantage of me, daddy please stop. I'm grown enough to make my choices."
"Oh yeah, was Negan honest to you about what he did? Did he tell you why hes locked in the cell? Were you grown enough for him to tell you that?"
"Dad stop it! You never told me yourself." You yelled back at him.
"I didnt tell you to protect you, he didnt tell you so he could get to use you. Why dont you tell her Negan, tell her what you did." Your father and you turned to Negan as you saw the look of guilt in his eyes.
"I'm not that same man anymore." Negan spoke low.
"Tell her what you did!" Your father yelled once again making you jump. Negan stood silent staring at you knowing there was nothing he could do at this point. Knowing you would never look at him the same way again.
"Negan...tell me." You whispered worriedly. Your father didn't want to hurt you, he didnt want to tell you this but clearly it was the only way to keep you away from him.
"Melody....Negan killed Glenn."
Your eyes bulged out as you stared at Negan in silence. He didnt say a word only confirming it to be true. Your eyes welled up with tears as you felt a knot build up in your throat.
"No.." you whispered feeling a tear roll down your cheek.
"That...that's a joke." You responded in denial.
"You...you wouldn't have let me...knowing that...you wouldnt..right?" You stared up at Negan realizing maybe your father was right. He took advantage using you for sex knowing the wrong he had done. He knew how you would feel about it but chose not to tell you so he could still have you.
"Glenn?" You whispered again remembering how you confided in Negan telling him how upset you were of the situation. And that's when he had asked you to leave...that was why he asked you to leave, you began to realize.
"I'm gonna be sick.." you turned away with your hand on your chest as your father rushed beside you putting his hand on your shoulder.
"Dont!" You suddenly yelled shaking his hand off.
"If it werent for you treating me like a damn child...hiding things from me...I wouldnt have fallen for this-"
"I tried to warn you." Your father responded calmly.
"If I would've known he killed Glenn I would've never...ever spoken to him!" You cried out as Negan looked down at the ground, he knew there was nothing he could say.
"Melody.." your father moved towards you making you move back.
"Dont. The both of you leave me the hell alone. Just leave me alone." You ran out of the house wiping your tears way. The two men staying in silence before Rick silently tied up Negans hands. Without alerting anyone you grabbed your emergency back pack you had hidden away by the entrance and quietly climbed out without anyone knowing. You wanted nothing more to do with Alexandria. You felt hurt, betrayed, lost, you thought of your friend Glenn and cried. You couldnt be here anymore and walked off not hearing Eugene call out your name as you ran off.
Eugene ran towards Rick's house catching him as he came out with Negan tied up.
"Rick, shes gone! She left...I tried stopping her-"
"Who?" Rick raised a brow speaking low to Eugene.
"Melody! She left she took a bag and left-"
"Melody." Negan whispered with a frown making Rick glare at him before turning back to Eugene.
"Which way did she go?"
"She went down the road turning left. Ya gotta find her I saw her crying." Eugene spoke in panic as Rick nodded with concerned eyes.
"Alright, here's what you're gonna do. I need you to take Negan back to the cell. I'm going to get Melody. Find Daryl and Michonne and tell them to meet me by the small lake by the road. Got it?"
"Y-you want me to stay with Negan?"
"Yes. Can you do that for me? I'm counting on you." Eugene nodded his head but was clearly nervous for the job. He handed Negan to Eugene and quickly ran off to leave and find you.
Negan watched Rick take off and didnt like the idea of you being out there alone and distraught. Hell, he found himself worried about you. Negan walked with Eugene pretending to stop and fix his shoe with his hands tied in front, he picked up a rock. Quietly he made his way to the cell as Eugene anxiously bought him inside.
"I like you, Eugene. But...I gotta do this."
"Do what?" He asked confused when Negan lifted up his hands and slammed the rock on his head making him knock out cold.
"Sorry man." He whispered before grabbing the knife out of Eugene's pocket and cutting the rope loose. Grabbing whatever weapon he could Negan was not going to let you be out there on your own. He felt at fault and he didnt want anything happening to you. Without being seen Negan climbed up the fence and made his way out determined to find you and bring you back home safely.
If you have any ideas you want to share for the next part, please send them in. Any feedback I appreciate. Thank you
#jeffrey dean morgan#the walking dead negan#negan x oc#negan fan fic#the walking dead fanfiction#twd negan#rick grimes#negan x you
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ok say hello to my insanely new oc who ive made entirely to be a villain who is still an excellent adult and a decent parent, probably. cares too much abt kids. think reigen mob psycho with a drop or two of milla. worked under Nick From The Mailroom and was actually in on his scheme.
has always been rather cold and brash towards adults, but is more caring towards kids. in my brain he has a brooklyn type accent? rough and tumble, walks around without a tie, yknow? they keep him cause he sorts mail real good, though.
(added a read more because this got INSANELY LONG AKSKSK i spent like an hr on this h)
he was a delugeionist, but only because he kinda just wanted to rip the world apart a little; lysandre vibes, thinks a lot of it is scum and needs to go. thinks the *psychonauts* are scum and need to go. hes psychic but suppressed it, think aquato parents but extra toxic about it, and straight up just saying being psychic is unnatural. wouldnt go to loboto parent lengths tho. so he adopted that thought of 'being psychic is unnatural and wrong', which contributed to a lot of self hate that was never learned out. likely, he realizes hes a shitty person and thinks he needs to go too. so like...yknow hank, dbh? kinda the vibe im gettin right now. way more formal, of course, and while usually gruff, is more polite when its needed; can and *will* beat the shit out of you verbally in a factual way, though, and can talk more street-lingo if hes talkin to real thugs. (probably winged it on his own after failing college or smth, hes got the vibes.)
anyways, its this plot where he slinks off and starts planting mistrust in the psychonauts or something. and inevitably he just...shows up and starts kidnapping people. dismantling things from the inside and all that. he left and formed a group who also hated psychics at some point, likely friends of his parents and friends of friends, all from his hometown. all of them fight *insanely* dirty, and a lot of them are insanely vulgar. the kids are supposed to be kept away.
but theres a line to follow here.
this man is a fold to raz. hates the psychonauts, hates being psychic, adopted his parent's hate of psychics, hates the *world.* raz is young and unburdened and unjaded...mostly. hes not the shock of water some young characters can be when it comes to being the foils of other characters; think steven with a villain or something, right? but raz is sassy and a little jaded, and not total sunshine positivity.
hes a child this man could look down on and not be immediately annoyed by, who is worried by yet respects raz's realization of the world as it is, however little that is.
and yet raz is still his foil. he still mostly loves the psychonauts, despite it all, he loves being psychic, for the most part, he dodged adopting his parents previous values, he still seems to have an even view of the world as a whole.
raz is jaded, if only a little, but he moved past it and accepted that things could still be bright. this man is jaded, but he stayed in his stormclouds, never looked for the sun.
ok where. was i. RIGHT ok so. at the beginning of this...story? the man finds raz being talked down to by one of the office workers; someone with weak psychic powers whos insanely jealous of his prowess. an adult who envies the young prodigy. and theyre giving him some insane task to do, like cleaning all of the closets within the hour, but hes saved the world twice, so he smiles and nods along, because he said he would help around the motherlobe, and this adult is asking him to do something that seems simple enough.
and this guy, internally, goes 'bitch.' for a good long second bc 1. dude even if you envy a kid, kinda fucked to show that?? not their fault 2. WHY are you asking a 10 year old to do that. why is there a 10 year old here. holy shit thats a 10 year old oh my god hes so tiny (no one told him there was a 10 year old because they knew hed stomp right up to management but. regardless. he is going to stomp up to management after this and no one can really stop him. except maybe raz well see)
so yknow. dude fixes his slight slouch and walks forward and politely tells this woman that 1. hes 10 why are you jealous of him and 2. hes 10????????? and shes like shit hes 10. and apologizes. and walks away
and raz is VERY ?? bc she was doing what? why is him being 10 important? and its that young part of you that gets pissed when people try to keep you from doing things because youre young and hes DEFINITELY yet to learn that piling responsibilites that should be handled by adults onto a child is fucked up in its own special way (looking at you ford, *nick*)
and the dude calmly explains because yea. he gets that. and he still sounds gruff and a little peeved but he squats down to razs height and he talks simply and factually, telling him straight on why it isnt right.
and. huh. people dont really do that for raz. except for sasha, sometimes, everyone likes to dodge the truth a lot with him, because hes 10, and sometimes, hes too nice to tug it out of them.
and this guy, this man that raz is already polishing a trophy for 'good adulting' in the back of his brain with his striking statements about how adults should handle things and kids should-kids should...get to have fun. not be traumatized.
for the shock on his face when raz said hed already saved the world a couple times, whats some closets. he reigned it in, said that its weird he saved the world, because thats usually their jobs.
and this guy offers his hand on instict before he stands up, even though he doesnt seem very sweet and kind like the adults that usually offer raz a hand. and he takes it, i think. he takes it.
warm. warm, a little nice.
reminds raz of his dad, maybe. he wonders if this man has any kids himself, but keeps his mouth shut, because he thinks he already has the answer, and its yes.
(he doesnt have any. he would wish he did, but he knows hed fail to raise them right.)
and when he stands, he asks raz what he was asking that woman for, and he says hes doing tasks around the motherlobe because his papers are still coming in. the man doesnt ask. (he knows what 'papers' means, realizes this is the tiny junior psychonaut every room in the damn place has been buzzing about, and he has fucking words for forsythe.) he just offers for the kid to sort mail under his supervision.
and that sounds boring. at least, it usually would.
this man is interesting, and a good...person? a good adult? hes...hes new. hes new, and calm, and a little like sasha but a lot not, and he thinks he trusts him.
so raz grins and says yea, mail sorting sounds nice.
(debatably, raz does not take his hand. hes too jaded when it comes to adults. debatably, he does not feel any warmth from this man who has taught him every adult has been telling him wrong. debatably, im projecting. but thats the whole point of ocs, hm?)
and then holes crop up in motherlobe systems. people are kidnapped.
raz keeps seeing the strange man, keeps telling him things, keeps hearing back, gruff and factual and a little annoyed, but raz can almost-just-barely tell its not at him, with the way he talks.
he can tell. he can tell.
he can never tell. this man is making sure he can tell.
raz trusts the man, is still polishing that trophy for 'best adulting' he has settling in the back of his mind.
and then the man comes with a militia.
he did not seem jaded. he did not seem hateful. he never showed any anger or hate towards raz.
but thats because he knows kids dont deserve it.
an excellent moral or two. a rotten, broken heart.
and at first, they keep the kids away, because these people fight dirty, because this isnt their battle, because the man has been sending emails about why 15 year olds are in a secret psychic agency.
(he does not mention raz. by razs second visit, he had just marked the boy down as another reason to hate the psychonauts as a whole, and especially its higher ups.
hes also regretting his alliance to nick by about the third. if he had known the man would puppet a child as if they were a toy, he would have organized his own rebellion ages ago.)
but eventually, the psychonauts need all hands on deck.
they send the children to find the missing agents.
the interns are fought on the way. some of them avoid the child, know the boss would pummel them.
they get to the base, and the strange man, the one with the broken trophy for 'best adult' (still barely-polished, because hes still so sure) still nestled in the back of razs brain, is still there.
the junior psychonauts are spotted. one of the guards throws a few rocks aimlessly.
they surprise them. one almost hits raz.
its intercepted instead.
and the other junior psychonauts watch as this man, their enemy, a villain, in their eyes, reprimands the other man for even accidentally daring, for even trying. for doing something they might have done just a month or so ago, if they had decided he was too much weirder than they already had.
and he yells something like, "Why the hell is he even here?! This is an enemy base, of whats a rebellion! This is a *10 year old*! What kind of adult sends a child *near* something like that?!" and he truly sounds angry this time, raz finds. hes too angry to keep it in. he still sounds gruff and oddly proper. raz is standing there, arms hanging. hes baffled in a specific way, the way he was every time the man's brow furrowed when he mentioned a harrowing story, the way he was the first day they met.
and he asks, a little quiet, a little small, a reminder of how young he really is, "Why are you still trying to keep me safe? We're supposed to be enemies now."
And his brow furrows further before flattening out, and he tilts onto one leg, and he swears he almost kneels to a knee.
He cant believe it. He really cant.
"You're 10." he says simply, softly, that factual way. "You shouldn't even be here."
and raz pauses. the interns freeze.
"...well, here I am."
and i think...it would be so intriguing if this was done halfway out of the mind, because this man is so against anything psychic. it would be so *compelling.*
so raz steps forward and asks again, asks why hes doing this.
and the mans eyes harden, he tries to turn off that soft heart, trying to remind himself of all that he hates. because he hates the psychonauts, because he sort of hates the world.
and raz asks why he could ever hate the psychonauts, head tilted, before listing off the few he knows to be true. but other than that, how? and ok, the world sucks a little, yea, hes seen that, gets that.
and he appreciates that this kid isnt totally gung ho about existence.
but he hates that he isnt, too.
and its this back and forth. everything the man hates, why he hates it. raz saying why its good but admitting why its bad.
and hes swayed, just a little.
but the man stands up from the kneel hed inevitably instinctively put himself into, and walks forward, hand held out yet again.
"You shouldn't be in the Psychonauts," he tells him, soft, factual, brow furrowed. "Come with me. I'll bring you back to your parents, or wherever it is you want to go."
raz contemplates. thinks, for a long moment.
he grabs the mans hand, warm and firm, yet again, for a terrifying moment.
before he reaches up to slap a mental door on his forehead, and astral projects into it.
he thinks this man is good. thinks hes just jaded.
thinks hes the best adult hes ever met, one who just happens to hate a lot of things.
hes only 10.
hes not letting someone who can tell him so clearly whats wrong and right for adults to tell him go that easily.
aaaand yknow. raz does his razzy thing. learns about why the guy hates the world and the psychonauts and himself. helps him learn that its not all bad, that he was excellent to raz, and still is, that things can be bad and good all at once.
the man concedes that raz is very capable, very smart, and can do a lot. but that doesnt mean he should have to.
raz tells him, though, that he likes working for the psychonauts. its his dream. and he realizes some things he was told to do were kinda screwed up, now. that maybe, in honesty, he was dealt a bad hand.
but hes done what he can with that hand, and he ended up with a royal flush.
and uh! yknow!! then raz leaves his mind and he calls off the rebellion! its like a rhombus of ruin type adventure, except without the villain being present beforehand. its just not clustered in insanely close with a ton of other wild shit.
anyways this got really long? sorry?? its an oc i just saw good adult and slight father vibe potential in the vibe i instantly got on him and then i went feral???? rip maybe someone will read this and if you did. congrats i honestly really liked how the whole foil and good-yet-bad and consideration of raz being 10 thing worked out. this oc is almost like our representative in the psychonauts world the way reigen is for the audience in mp100. yea :) i match them up a lot but thats just cause they vibe a lot. anyways its 1:40 am now and i spent abt an hour on this hope it vibed mildly byeeee
#GOD THAT GOT LONG. ALSMSKKS APOLOGIES OH MH GOD#psychonauts#psychonauts oc#and my personal tag:#pn oc#trash talks#long post#like! insanely long!!!!!!! i am so so sorry maybe i should make a cut#psychonauts 2 spoilers#like a lot tbh alskssk#OK READMORE SUCCESSFULLY ADDED!!! THNX GOOGLE <3
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what i like abt muren and li chen
i’m sorta burned out and my vagina is bleeding so lemme see if i can type this. probably can lmao. my brain is going ten miles a minute.
1. the fact that they were friends first.
someone on here said this and idk who but i don’t want to seem like it was my idea.
the fact that they are friends and didn’t have like a connection previously and it developed. most times friends-to-lovers has a basis of some sort of romantic interest from another person so they were not truly ever friends, you know? and many relationships people aren’t friends first but that’s the best kind. and they are the truest form in that (i wouldnt say truest means good but just i think a representation of) they were truly friends, no attraction at least consciously, and were lead into it.
2. bc they know each other well and are friends they know each other and LAUGH and if you can’t laugh with your love then there is no point. 0. lmao. i love it
idk they fell easily in2 the luvy duvy part and u can actually believe they are into each other like outside of kissing. gee. also hello! when lichen like threw the heart in the office and muren caught it? bitch! i woulda been like ew!!!!! and blushed but muren was like that’s right that’s my bitch
3. bouncing off 2 um uhhhhh the way they interact so i guess this is 2 but whatver i like lists now
muren is >:O but super sweet and receptive to others. so he responds to people and it isn’t just stoic for stoic sake or with not much substance. idk how to say this but oftentimes sometimes i feel like characters will be too oppositional to offset their partner and it can be extremely annoying to watch because it’s part of the dynamic but sometimes there’s a lack of reciprocation. i like that even if muren is quiet he smiles a lot and lets people know through his actions and shit. esp his mans. and when he needs to talk, he will.
lichen is perfect for this because of reasons. what do you even say about this dude holy shit. first of all he really is a fucking himbo. he’s not even dumb he’s just a fucking himbo. it’s great to say the way they express their excitement and the best thing to hear, “i can be myself around you”
4. u cannnot tell me that this top/bottom discourse is actually not ridiculous esp for them bc there is no way that my eyes are seeing what i see yet there’s some struggle when they’re trying to constantly grapple with the masculine/feminine aspects (this is a good thing)
with the way that they hang off each other. esp bc lichen is shorter than him and stockier and he can attach himself like a barnacle. the way he expresses glee and love is very “feminine” at times IE reliance, support, putting your head on his etc but then there are times when he is the one to hold muren too. so it’s like they are clearly on the same level in how they exchange love and stuff and exploring the dynamics but it clearly isnt as structured as the usual ones and it shouldnt be so they should just stop talking about this shit cos ur both getting fucked god shut up
lichen squeals like a girl and is obsessed with him. he is clingy and also says “what do you want to do to me.” if this show is gonna sit us through the agony of this stupid discourse and they tell me they arent gonna sw*tch or whatever (not that they cant have other forms of sex bc that is not that difficultand as adults w eknow this but anywaaay) then they simply are wrong
5. the ~gay 4 u~ thing is dumb and i cannot believe it tbqh cos it’s like sir....but i am glad that lichen like expresses attraction to his physique and personhood as a man and acknowledging that that is something and a part of the attraction.
it was probably a happy accident but it’s still a good one. there’s sometimes an idea of like sexual attraction being sorta nebulous when someone is like getting into a rship with the same gender but not being sure about their sexuality or whatever or still liking another gender explicitly where they cant admit they find things attractive or enticing even when they are in a same sex relationship and it is so fucking confusing and doesn’t make sense. i wish instead of trying to make it cut and dry they just went honestly mabye they dont know but theyre both men and thats a factor. ok lets move on now. :)
6. they make u feel nice
especially in comparison to the show being messy and also there’s some crazy stalker man running around you know they temper that
they’re just really fun to watch. it’s an interesting dynamic and particularly with xing si in their lives it’s nice and i’m so glad there’s no one else to ruin it like say a brother who is a waste of space. but it’s mostly good feelings for them and you can see why they like each other, that they can stay together, and how helpful a relationship can be as you grow as an individual
7. while i am sure there will be further misunderstandings...comm...unic...ation?
literally boys are dumb as hell but idk if my reading is correct on this one but SO FAR TO MOI im like wow u guys like actually talk. woah. and i think that’s nice. yest i had a breakdown in front of my fam bc i am sometimes emotionally stunted when faced with distress so it’s nice to see people talking that out in particularly with like jealousy and stuff
AND their interactions in public and the understanding. knowing it takes time and stuff for them to adjust and allowing them the time. they are extremely different to other people and they want to be distinct and they can be and arre to each other they dont need to follow anyone else’s rules (except the costume department sometimes needs to get better pants for muren like that’s my rule tbh but that’s neither here nor there)
did some1 call them emotional support himbos? i think so cos word.
oh one more thing idk the name of the actor playing li chen and im too tired to look it up but i like him a lot i think he does a good job of going seamlessly between like a jubilant person and an actual human being. he plays well at being oblivious but not outright stupid and emotionally stunted or not picking up certain signals. i think at times it seems like he doesn’t always have a sense of self like trying to be something else for other people but then he realizes like he can’t do that so all he can do is be himself which leads him 2 his mans but yea. the actor does a decent job! it’s a fun character to wathc
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Episode 3: The Wedding Job
And so we begin the “The Network Fucked Up” saga with episode 7 which is SUPPOSED to be episode 3.
Huge men drinking out of tiny teacups is hilarious and will never stop being so.
Nate, stop being such a control freak. “I thought I pick the clients” DUDE CHILL
“No more, no less” honey you getting much more
“We’ll get back to you” FUCK YOU NATE
PARKER LOVES KIDS EPISODE 1
NATE IF YOU HAD FOUND THIS CASE YOU’D TAKE IT IN AN INSTANT YOU’RE JUST MAD YOU DIDN’T FIND IT
FBI!!! TAGGERT AND MCSWEETEN!! AHH OKAY I LOVE THEM
“They just need validation” BITCH ME TOO THE FUCK
TODAY IN THEY MAKE PEOPLE LOOK UNNECESSARILY STUPID
Hardison is so gregarious it’s so amazing to watch
“I don’t have to type anything right” oh my god
TAPES! “HARDISON HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WALK OUT OF THE FBI OFFICES WITH A BOX FULL OF TAPES?” “pUNCH someBODY!” “oh I’m gonna PUNCH SOMEBODY” God i love them
Jersey Boys I can’t, it’s terrible guys. Do mobsters have no taste
Oh look, it’s that woman who’s in EVERYTHING
What is Parker wearing on her head
Everyone talks about bridezillas, but no one talks about mother of the bridezillas.
WHY DIDN’T THEY HIRE A WEDDING PLANNER IN THE FIRST PLACE
SOPHIE FOCUSING ON HER PERSONAL PROBLEMS WITH NATE INSTEAD OF THE JOB EPISODE 1
ELIOT THE CHEF EPISODE 1
HOLY SHIT I LOVE HIM
ELIOT GETTING TOO ATTACHED TO HIS COVER STORY AND FORGETTING ABOUT THE JOB EPISODE 1
He’s so mad that she doesn’t like it I lovehim I LOVE HIM I FUCKING LOVE ELIOT SPENCER
“Imagine if we had bugs planted all over the house” WHY THE FUCK DON’T YOU
How the fuck is the dress so ugly? WHY IS THAT WHAT THEY WANT? WHO WEARS PINK RUCHED SATIN WITH BLUE FLOWERS
I mean, other than, like, me @6 years old. But really, no one should be wearing the clothes I wore at 6 years old.
Also it’s just.. the worst length. Like if it was a long dress it might be better.
Nate the pastor episode 1
God that future son in law seems like a dream guy I love him
Maria Moscone deserves better than her scumbag parents let’s be real
SOPHIE TAKING THINGS TOO PERSONALLY AND GETTING THE WAY OF THE JOB
THIS!!! THIS IS WHY THE NETWORK ORDER MAKES NO SENSE!!! THIS HERE’S AN AIMEE REFERENCE BUT IF THEY’D ALREADY DONE THE TWO HORSE JOB, HARDISON WOULD’VE KNOWN ABOUT HER AND NOT ASKED
“What did you do?” “Me? I liberated CROATIA!” *angry apple bite* i CAN’T I LOVE HIM
DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW PARKER ISN’T A BRIDESMAID? HOW IS THAT DRESS FOOLING ANYONE
Hardison in love with Parker is so pure
… Okay but shouldn’t maria and blonde n’ bitchy know that Parker isn’t a bridesmaid? Wouldn’t the other bridesmaids know? Why does no one in the wedding party question ANYTHING?
HARDISON’S SCARF THOUGH
WHY IS HER MOTHER WEARING WHITE?? WHO WEARS WHITE TO A WEDDING WTF
MARIA MOSCONE DESERVES BETTER
SOPHIE FUCK OFF!! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?? THIS ISN’T IMPORTANT SOPHIE!! SOPHIE STOP IT!! SOPHIE SHUT UP!
M A R I A M O S C O N E D E S E R V E S B E T T E R
The Butcher of Kiev is the best subplot of this episode but HOW THE FUCK DID THEY ALL KNOW HE AND ELIOT HAD A PAST
Sophie is so fucking annoying in this episode I hate her right now
THESE PEACHES AREN’T GONNA POACH THEMSELVES PARKER
OH MY GOD NATE SHUT UP
NATE SHUT UP
NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR THIS NATE
SHUT THE FUCK UP NATE
THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU NATE
“In my day, no one would do business at their daughter’s wedding” WELL THEN DON’T DO BUSINESS
Parker’s face smushed against the glass is great
Ahh yes, you don’t get the money so you SHOOT THE BRIDE. Because THAT’s not gonna cause a scene and get you arrested.
OK be honest is there anyone who was surprised by the wife being responsible? Bc I’m not
Eliot’s face is like “TFW the guy whose face you burned shows up at a wedding you’re supposed to be pretending to but actually are catering with a cleaver and backup and the overwhelming urge to kill you”
I know that’s super specific but that’s what it is
Parker’s really good at playing drunk
But also, why did they not question what she was doing behind the curtain
Like she just happened to appear after they were finished talking about VERY ILLEGAL THINGS and they aren’t at all suspicious?
Also, Parker using Hardison as a cover is just… I love it.
You’re laughing. Eliot brought a whisk to a knife fight and you’re laughing.
The saddest part is Eliot has any sort of cooking implement. You should be terrified right now
Okay so let me get this straight. A guy is StrANGLING you, you get your hands on a rolling pin, and your instinct isn’t, “hey, I can use this rolling pin to clobber him over the head,” the instinct is “Let me use this rolling pin to get my hands on the appetizers?” Like, yes, lemon juice, but also ROLLING PINS ARE HEAVY AND YOU COULD AT LEAST KNOCK THE GUY OUT
But no, let me shove fucking MUSHROOMS in his eyes because otherwise how else would we get the symmetry of the butcher yelling “IT BUUUURRRNNNNSS” both times he fights Eliot
And then he uses the fucking serving tray to bonk him on the head INSTEAD OF THE DUCKING ROLLING PIN
LIKE SERIOUSLY HAVE YOU EVER USED A ROLLING PIN AS A WEAPON
I’M NOT SAYING I HAVE BUT OUCH
Like, just… If I had a choice between being hit over the head with a thin sheet of metal or a log of wood with metal inside it, I’d pick the sheet, because at least that one has some give.
“It’s the lemon juice” How does Eliot make that sound badass
“You just kill a guy with an appetizer?” How the FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW THAT??
WHY DOES NO ONE ASSUME A ROLLING PIN WOULD BE AN OKAY WEAPON
Or like LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE IN THAT KITCHEN. THERE ARE CAST IRON PANS IN THAT KITCHEN. Or just liek… regular pans. HAVE YOU EVER DROPPED A NONSTICK PAN ON YOUR FOOT? IT FUCKING HURTS?? WHY IS THE APPETIZER YOUR FIRST INSTINCT NATE
Also, he’s clearly not dead. What the fuck
“I don’t know, maybe” I KNOW AND tHE ANSWER IS NO YOU OBVIOUSLY DIDN”T
...who honeymoons in Kansas? Is that a thing?
They are a very cute couple i’ve gotta be honest
“Exactly what denomination are you reverend?” He isn’t
“You’re not Mary Poppins, youre a bitch” Okay pot. Okay.
LITERALLY THAT FUCKING HANDBAG WOULD AHVE MADE A BETTER WEAPON THAN THE MUSHROOMS
How does Hardison remember all those numbers? He didn’t even hear a bunch of them, but he takes the book out so slowly? DOES HARDISON HAVE AN EIDETIC MEMORY? WHY IS THAT NOT A PLOT POINT MORE OFTEN
Like I’m just saying, someone tries to tell me their phone number more than 3-4 numbers at a time and I get confused. But hardison just… remembers
What happened to the cash? The daughter gets the fucking wedding present she DESERVES for putting up with her awful parents that’s what
Hardison appreciating Eliot’s cooking is EVERYTHING
“I left him five dollars for socks” Well everyone needs socks.
Okay wait I just had a thought
If Nate isn’t an actual Reverend, is that marriage even legal? Does Nate just happen to also be a legally ordained minister? Did they have to get him an online ordainment? WhY did we not see that scene? WHAT IF HE’S NOT AND THEY AREN’T ACTUALLY MARRIED
And today on “I clearly think far too much about these things”
PARKER WIth KIDS IS EVERYTHING
Eliot cooking for his family I love it
ELIOT IN A TANK TOP I LOVE IT
Was Eliot’s arms the most important part of this scene? Probably not
Is it the only thing I care about? ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY
I”M A SIMPLE GIRL AND HE HAS VERY NICE ARMS OKAY
Final thoughts: 9/10. I love this episode so much guys. Points off because really who the fuck wears white to a wedding. I know that’s the point but its very off putting. Also for the bridesmaid dresses because they were ugly as sin. Actual point off for the wife secretly being awful. Very predictable, ew. Extra points for Chef!Eliot. Extra points for Eliot’s arms. Points off for Nate and Sophie being completely insufferable. Extra points for Parker being great in this episode. Points off for the FUCKING ROLLING PIN YES I’M STILL ANGRY DONT @ ME. Extra points for Eliot killing a man with an appetizer because it’s still funny. Extra points for no IYS or Sam references THANK THE FUCKING LORD. Or, at least, if there was, i didn’t notice, meaning it wasn’t egregious so whatever. So yeah, anyway I really fucking love this episode.
IYS Count: 2/3
Sam Count: 2/3 AND WE ARE ALL BETTER OFF FOR IT
#leverage#leverage rewatch#eliot spencer#alec hardison#parker#sophie devereaux#nathan ford#ot3#leverage ot3#the wedding job
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The First Day of School
It was a dewy morning. Not too hot, not too cold, far too humid. It was the usual for Hyakkou High School, where students came to learn and excel in their studies while maintaining good social relationships. The school was usually filled with many different students. Any stereotype you could think of, Hyakkou had it.
The students usually had fun. The Principal was quite lax when it came to certain things. All he asked of the students was to respect each other and respect the building. And to keep their grades up of course. They would be failing as a school if the students weren’t receiving the proper education!
And this is where their story begins.
“Ack. Hey! Mary!” Ryota called out from behind the blonde, who was currently looking down on her phone. The boy ran up to his best friend, hooking his arm around the back of her neck to bring her into a headlock. “Hey! Don’t mess up my hair you dork!” Mary growled, trying to wrestle her way out of Ryota’s lock.
The two continued their conundrum until they reached the gates of the school, where Mary finally got a good grip and threw her friend over her shoulder, thus leading to him falling on his backpack. “Ow…,” he muttered, smiling like an idiot.
Mary Saotome and Ryota Suzui had been friends since childhood. They were even neighbors, and she often came over to his house to play on his Wii with him. Their friendship had blossomed into a relationship.
Until they realized they were better off as best friends. In fact, after they had broken up and continued to be platonic, it seemed as though their friendship grew stronger.
“Hi guys!” The two heard a familiar voice, registering it as their other best friend, Yumeko Jabami. Yumeko had met them all in middle school, when she had moved here with her sister. The ravenette was one to take risks, and found pleasure in dangerous things. Of course, only in moderation. In reality, the only things she had taken much risk for was a move in a fighting game. Or a board game.
Her bubbly exterior was often in place of her mellow interior. She tended to keep to herself truly, unless with her friends.
“Yumeko!” Ryota yelled happily, jogging over and scooping the girl in a tight hug. Much to his delight, Yumeko returned the hug tenfold.
“ShiT, I can’t breaTHE-,” he barely managed, his face turning purple. He should have known, the girl was a strong hugger. “Oi, calm down you two, before I separate you guys for 10 minutes straight, and I know that will be a pain since you usually do homework together in the mornings,” Mary stated, crossing her arms. Yumeko finally relented, giving Ryota’s respiratory system some reprieve. Yumeko looked quite meek, but she could give hugs like no other.
“Mary!” Yumeko giggled, giving the blonde another one of her bone crushing hugs. “Sup, dumbass,” Mary replied, smiling softly at her friend’s gestures of affection. “Are you all ready for your first days of school!?”
It was the start of junior year for the three, and boy were their classes packed. Ryota was taking a few classes on science and health, as well as a gym class to exercise and get fit. He wanted to be a firefighter, and such education was necessary to ensure he was a good candidate for the job.
“I have… Anatomy first period. Woohoo,” Mary sighed. She was actually quite excited, but decided not to show it in order to keep her cool exterior. The path she had chosen was Emergency Medical Services, and taking anatomy was the first step in her opinion.
“Oh? That’s so wonderful! I have Calculus for my first period. I wonder if Sayaka is going to be in that class!” Yumeko said eagerly. Sayaka was one of the other kids attending this school. The girl mainly kept to herself, but she had recently started acquainting herself with the ravenette.
“Gah! Sorry I’m late guys! I kinda missed my bus…” A ginger voice panted, revealed to be none other than Itsuki Sumeragi. The strawberry blonde had met the three last year when she was a sophomore. After transferring from a private school to Hyakkou, the tight-knit group had taken her in, welcoming her as one of their own. “Hey! I heard there’s gonna be a pair of new students! I hear they’re seniors,” Itsuki gossiped, taking out her Nintendo Switch and turning it on.
“Ooh, Smash? Let’s do this!” Ryota declared, taking his controller and setting it to his button map.
“So what about these new students? Do they seem weird or anything?” Mary inquired, picking her character, King K. Rool, and setting her button map. “Oh come on, why do you ALWAYS play heavies!?” Ryota complained, picking Marth as his character. “Because heavies are fucking goated, why else?” the blonde snarked back, a sly smirk on her face.
“I don’t know. But I heard they’re twins!” Itsuki giggled, sitting down to watch them play.
“Heya guys,” a shrill voice came out of nowhere. “You playin’ Smash? I’ll join!” it giggled. Runa had seemingly appeared out of nowhere in her oversized jacket. “Oh no…,” The entire group groaned.
“Runa, you’re cool and all, but whenever we play with you, you find a way to resize our assholes every match in different ways. I really don’t want to get 0-to-deathed consecutively while you stay on three stocks. Seriously, how the fuck do you even do it!?” Mary spoke, seemingly for the entire group. “I dunno, just practice TBH,” was all Runa said, picking up a controller. “And fuck you, I’m playing anyway.”
The sound of groans could be heard around the courtyard after that statement.
Sayaka Igarashi, resident Valedictorian-to-be, had come over to the table with Midari Ikishima, who was dragging along a seemingly sleepy senior. “C’mon Yuriko. I know you have senioritis but our friends are here!” Midari grumbled, literally dragging Yuriko. Yuriko Nishinotounin had gotten a severe case of Senioritis, especially since most of her classes were a breeze this year.
“Would you both calm down please!? They’re playing a game, and I’m trying to read!” Sayaka chided, mentally swearing at the rebel. “Chill out, Sayaka, Yuriko is already falling asleep on me and it’s not even 7:30!” Midari grumbled.
“I can’t wait for senior year to be over,” Yuriko yawned, sitting on the table everyone was at basically falling asleep.
“What the fu- NO!” Mary yelled, distracted by Yuriko long enough for Runa to get a move on her, resulting in her virtual demise. “Fuuuuck!” she sighed, hitting her head against the wooden table. “FUCK!” she repeated, after feeling the pain that came along with it. Ryota had already fallen out of the competition.
Please nerf Lucas.
Yumeko hummed happily to herself, reading some random tabloid article on her phone. As the bell rang, they all dispersed into their classes.
“See you guys later!” Ryota called, jogging over to the weight room for his first period.
The three girls had made their way over to the Portables, then separating into their classrooms.
Sayaka practically dragged her two friends to their classes and then her own, all while keeping to the schedule. Anatomy was her first period, and she sat next to Mary.
It wouldn’t be too bad of a year. Mary was a good student and wasn’t too hard to talk to. She just mostly liked to keep to herself.
“Good morning class! Welcome to Anatomy! You guys are obviously gonna be learning about the body, it’s functions, what is where and what goes where and woop dee dah, all the good stuff! Hopefully I can make learning about how food passes through the body actually entertaining for y’all, but first we have two new students with us today! They’ve recently transferred over, so let’s give ‘em a warm welcome to Hyakkou!” The teacher, Mrs. Murray, announced. She looked a bit older, with a tall figure and ginger hair in her face. Her glasses looked odd, but it added to her look.
People like Mrs. Murray because she was actually a good teacher. She cared about her students and actually helped them if they needed it.
“Ladies, if you would please introduce yourselves!”
The entire class looked at the two, and for a moment they thought they saw double.
“Hello. My name is Kirari Momobami. I’m a senior here, and it’s a pleasure to meet you all. I hope we can get along,” The girl, now known as Kirari, had stated.
It seemed her sister’s turn was up next.
“Er.. I’m Ririka Momobami. We’re twins. I hope we can… have a good time!” Ririka muttered, almost too quietly for the class to hear.
Mrs. Murray smiled and beckoned them to take their seats.
Their seats were in front of both Sayaka and Mary, who seemed to be in a state of both ‘gay’ and ‘panic’.
The two twins looked vastly different, with Kirari’s hair done in twin loop braids and dressed in a rather classy manner, while Ririka’s hair was free to fall.
Wait.
Did Ririka have a sweatshirt that had the Poggers Man on it?
Mary internally laughed at that. It was adorable.
When class had dispersed to work in groups, Mary and Sayaka had picked each other on instinct, then looking for two more partners to start their work on.
“Sayaka!” Mary whisper-yelled, a small blush on her face. She then gestured to her phone to text the girl.
Mary S: HOLY SHIT IM GAY
Sayaka I: I am too. Which one are you gay for?
Mary S: Ririka.
Sayaka I: Oh. I like her too.
Mary glared at Sayaka for a moment.
Mary S: The one with the adorable hair and clothing?
The blonde mentally facepalmed, of course Sayaka would think that. No matter the twin.
Sayaka I: Yes. I love how her hair is done. Plus her shirt looks nice.
Mary S: Oh. So the one with the weird braids?
Sayaka I: Don’t call them weird.
Mary S: ok but dont worry cause im crushing on the other twin. I swear her sweatshirt is adorable.
Sayaka I: .
Sayaka I: poggers
Mary S: LMAO HOLD UP IM SCREENSHOTTING THIS ONE
Sayaka I: Be my guest.
The two had reluctantly come up to the twins.
“Hello! I am Sayaka Igarashi, and this is Mary Saotome. It seems you both don’t have another pair, so if you’d like, we can work with you,” Sayaka stated, trying to sound as polite as possible. Nothing could hide the blush on her face though.
“Sure, I would love to work with you both,” Kirari replied, a small smirk forming on her face.
Ririka just nodded with a small smile.
It was going to be a long year.
#au tag#kakegurui#kirari momobami#meariri#kirasaya#sayaka igarashi#mary saotome#yumeko jamabi#ryota suzui#runa yomozuki#itsuki sumeragi#ririka momobami
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can you do hotch with a reader with an age gap? maybe something to do with the song “dont stand so close to me” from the police
hello darling! here you go. i obviously aged the song up so she’s in higher education so as to not make her younger than 25 which is my usual rule of thumb. enjoyyyyyyyy! xo
aaron hotchner x reader - just a number
young teacher, the subject of schoolgirl fantasy
Aaron needs to stop letting himself get roped into this kind of thing. He’s much better suited for sitting behind a desk than standing in front of a classroom. But here he was anyway, at Virginia Commonwealth University, guest-lecturing for a Professional Ethics and Liability class. The professor was a friend of his from his prosecutor days and he owed her a favor.
Despite Hotch’s general confidence surrounding his career, public speaking is not one of his favorite things. But he’s gotten good at faking it over the years, so his voice carries throughout the lecture hall confidently. There couldn’t be more than 30 people in the room considering the class was only open for people pursuing an M.S. in Criminal Justice. Perhaps this is why his eyes kept wandering back to you. Sitting third row left, dutifully taking notes.
At first, there didn’t seem to be anything special about you. Sure, you were beautiful, but all the girls in the lecture hall were objectively good looking. You weren’t even dressed to impress, lounging in your seat with leggings and a big sweatshirt on. But you had a wiser-than-your-years air about you, and you seemed extremely interested in the subject matter. Hotch couldn’t stop thinking about you, couldn’t tear his gaze away every time you wrapped your lips around the straw of your iced coffee. His interest in you nagged at him. You couldn’t possibly be older than 25. He’d never felt so attracted to someone so young before. Although not explicitly wrong, it did conflict with his personal morals.
she wants him so badly, knows what she wants to be
Yeah, you had a crush on Aaron Hotchner. Despite having only known of his existence for about an hour and 45 minutes, you were under his spell. He’s more charming and well-spoken than most of your professors, and they do this shit for a living. The way he carries himself, the way he moves his hands when gesturing to the screen. It was… hot. But it was more than that. He was smart and competent and his credentials were certainly impressive. And you weren’t the only one to notice. There were many people in your class that looked as interested in him as you felt.
“That’s all I have for you today. Does anybody have any questions?” Hotchner asks the PowerPoint goes black. A few people raise their hands, including yourself. You actually do have a question, but you’re filled with nerves as he looks at you.
“Yes, you in the third row. What’s your name?” He asks. You feel hot.
“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), sir.” God, he hates that you called him that. Or rather, he hates how much he loves it. You ask your question about how attorney allocations often lead to unjust decisions in court. Agent Hotchner smiles as you speak, causing one girl to turn to you and roll her eyes. Oops?
her friends are so jealous, you know how bad girls get
sometimes it's not so easy to be the teacher's pet
“That’s a great question, (Y/N).” Hotchner says (earning you eye roll #2) before spouting off an answer, which you scribbled down in your notebook. He answers a few more questions, and you notice that he didn’t ask anyone else for their name. But that doesn’t mean anything right? As your professor joins Agent Hotchner in the front to thank him for speaking, you realize that you’re never going to see this man again.
And frankly, that’s unacceptable.
You need to say something to him before he leaves, so you stay in your seat as the other students either leave or walk up to talk to Professor Ramirez or Hotchner. Many students are attempting to mask their blatant flirtation with a question, which, like, power to them, but you still felt the distant and unfamiliar sting of jealousy. You don’t miss the way the Agent keeps looking at you, however, which fuels your barely existent confidence. You walk up to Hotchner right after the last student leaves, and boldly stick your hand out. He shakes it and the warmth of his hand seems to move through your entire body.
“It’s (Y/N), correct?” He asks. You nod.
“That’s correct, Agent.” Hotchner smiles at you.
“Please, you can call me Hotch.” He says.
“Alright, Hotch. I just wanted to say that it’s great to meet you. An honor, really.”
“It’s great to meet you too.” He says, and if you didn’t know better you would say his tone was FLIRTATIOUS, “Are you interested in working for the FBI?” He asks and you can’t help but laugh.
“God, no.” You say, which makes him raise an eyebrow.
“No?”
“Sorry, sir, no offense, but I really don’t trust the government enough to work for them.” You say, and try to contain your smile when he laughs.
“Fair enough. So what is it you want to be doing?”
“I’ll tell you, but you can’t laugh at me-”
“I would never laugh at you.” He interrupts, and you smile.
“Okay, then. I want to be a private investigator.” Hotch looks surprised, but he nods in approval.
“I can respect that. Although you’ll make plenty of enemies that way.”
“Hm. That’s okay with me. I have a lot of friends.”
“So you’ll strike a balance.”
“Exactly.”
You stand in front of him for a second, calculating your next move.
“Is there something you needed to ask me?” He asks, looking into your eyes. You almost chicken out, but then-
“Yes, actually. Um, this is a bit weird, and I’ve never done this before, but… would you maybe want to get dinner with me sometime?” You ask, forcing yourself not to break eye contact. Hotch’s face remains controlled, and you can’t gauge his reaction.
temptation, frustration, so bad it makes him cry
“I’m sorry, (Y/N). You’re lovely and seem like a great person, but I don’t think that would be appropriate.” He says, and you deflate (although you try not to show it). Trying not to cry from embarrassment, you smile at him and nod.
“I understand, Agent. Have a good night!” You say, staying as positive as possible. Hotch looks at you with pity, which is the last thing you need.
“I really am sorry, (Y/N).” He says.
“Don’t be. Have a good night.” You say, and you’re out the door before he can respond.
You walk to the exit and groan when you see that it’s pouring rain outside.
“Shit.” You say, digging around in your bag for your umbrella, but you can’t find it anywhere.
“Fuck.”
Usually, you’d walk to your apartment from school, but you can barely see the street in front of you with all the rain. You jog over to the bus stop and nearly collapse onto the seat, ignoring everyone around you. Today sucks.
wet bus stop, she's waiting, his car is warm and dry
Hotch pulled out of his reserved parking space carefully. He’s glad he thought to take an umbrella today. He turns up the heat in his car and breathes in the warm air. He can’t stop thinking about you. Was he an idiot for turning you down? It felt like the right thing to do, but now he just feels stupid. He groans as he pulls up at a stoplight. Driving through Richmond at night and in this weather was going to be a nightmare. He looks to his right and sees you, soaking wet and miserable. God. He’s pulling the car over before he can even weigh his options. There’s no way he was going to make you take the bus this late without any protection. He rolled down his window.
“(Y/N)!” He called, startling you. You look up, your expression a mix of hopefulness and embarrassment.
“Yeah?” You ask tentatively. Hotch falters for a moment, then says,
“I can drive you home.”
“Oh, no, it’s okay I’ll just-”
“I’m worried about you. Get in if you want. It’s really no problem.”
You hesitate, and Hotch can practically hear your conflicting thoughts. But you get in the car nonetheless, and holy shit. He has heated seats.
“Thank you.” You say as you close the door. You immediately feel better, the warmth of the car soothing you, the leather seats making you feel less guilty for being soaked in this obviously expensive car.
“It’s no problem. Where should I go?”
You give him directions, his rumbling voice and soft demeanor making you feel so comfortable. The drive only takes 5 minutes, and suddenly you wish you lived farther away.
“It’s this one.” You say, and he parallel parks flawlessly. Hot.
“I’ll walk you up.” He says, reaching for his seatbelt. You put your hand over his before he can unclick it, and he looks up at you.
“Don’t please. I’ll be fine.” You rush out, not eager for him to see the inside of your shabby apartment building. He relents, but before you can pull your hand away he grabs it, softly stroking it with his thumb. It’s an awkward angle, but it makes your heart race nonetheless.
“Hotch?” You ask quietly, and he’s pulled out of his trance. He pulls his hand away and turns back to face the front.
“Sorry. Uh, good night.” He says, and you sigh.
“I’m 25, Hotch. I have a full-time job-”
“(Y/N)-”
“No. Let me say this, please. I have a full-time job and I’m taking night classes for my Master’s. I have my own insurance. I can vote, drink, rent a car. My brain is fully developed. You aren’t my boss. You aren’t my professor. You’re just a guy. I’m just a girl. It’s that simple. If you aren’t interested just say that and I’ll get out right now. But if this is about my age, or your age, then I think you’re making a mistake.” You say, your voice growing stronger with each word. Hotch looks at you, but his guard isn’t up this time. You know exactly what he’s thinking.
“Kiss me, Hotch.” You say. Hotch smiles.
“Call me Aaron.”
“Okay, how many times are you gonna change your name because-”
Aaron pulls you to him before you can finish your thought. His lips are softer than you expected, and he kisses like a guy with 20 years more experience than you. And it’s amazing.
“Wow.” You say as he pulls away. He presses his forehead against yours, and he’s full-on grinning now.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to walk you to your door?” He asks, and you can’t help it: You giggle like a schoolgirl.
don't stand so close to me
#criminal minds#criminal minds imagine#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner x reader#hotch imagine#hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#ssa hotchner
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who wants to read an essay about my relationship with simping/an appreciation(/simping lol) post about Will+Eret and also seperately tommyinnit that was written at 4:22 am and then added to the queue because i love the queue system also fun fact i pronounced the word ‘queue’ as ‘cc-week’ for like an entire year and idk why anyways
lets just jump into it
lol
so. if somebody was to ask me who my favorite mcyt is, i would think about it for a moment and eventually answer with either Wilbur or Eret. and i think that is purely out of simping instinct or whatever the fuck.
to start, Wilbur; the prettiest man, period. i do not take constructive criticism. he is literally gorgeous and i get so mad at him for putting himself down all the time because he doesnt deserve the shit, especially not from himself. he is 24 years old and has the lowest self-esteem out of anybody i can think of. i want to yell in his face all the time. i want to tell him simps are the same species as him, and they have REASONS to simp. if you keep seeing appreciation posts about yourself (which im sure he does) that means people APPRECIATE YOU and WANT YOU to feel APPRECIATED.
anyway, back to simping. let’s start from the top. his goddamn hair. it is, it is, and i just took a deep breath, so pretty. maybe it isnt the hair itself, probably, but the way it is done. wavy dark brown hair all floofy in the front. and he is constantly messing with it, which is THE cutest thing. when he is excited, he moves a lot, and his hair moves with him and gets messed up and ahhhcvkvyr moving on.
his face? lets start with his eyes. they are so pretty. i think my opinion on eyes is probably weird, and allow me to explain why. i never ever notice somebodies eye color when talking to them. i just dont even look. so when i am actively paying attention to somebody’s eyes, they are that much more important to me. but idk, i kinda feel like his eyes are one of the biggest factors of his face? like, he looks really pretty whether he is smiling or not, because his face doesn’t ride on his smile.
sidetrack paragraph about george: i think george is that way. he is adorable, but he is only really adorable when he is smiling. if i look up ‘georgenotfound cute’ it will be entirely him smiling, and never any other facial expression because he genuinely looks like the fucking weirdest thing sometimes when making a serious face. back to will.
i dont pay attention to noses because who even cares dude but i’m sure his nose does a good job of supporting his looks as well so good job nose
his SMILE. he doesn’t need to smile, but dude, when he does, it’s like i always used to say (and still would say) in regards to eijiro kirishima. it’s like... sunbeams, like rays of light are in his mouth and escaping when he smiles.i wonder how he keeps a star in there. because his smile literally lights up my heart. and when he tilts his head(basically all the time luckily)? so goddamn pretty. pretty man. pretty.
that brings us to his neck, which is- no, kidding, but i do want to talk about his vocal chords! firstly his speaking voice, which i guess as an american it hits different for me because of the accent. but- i dont think i can put it into words. but the way he puts thoughts into words-(lol) idk, his voice is just really sweet. and his SINGING VOICE, here we go.
so he sings, duh. and i- holy fuck. he just sounds good, you know? he is a good singer. i want to put my emotions simply this time. he sings well, and he sounds good. a pretty voice for a pretty man. i cant even try to elaborate.
basically the only other thing of my concern is his fucking yellow sweater? or jumper or whatever the fuck? and his beanie? on his body? damn. i am genuinely attached to that sweater. it just looks good, ok? it does.
oh yeah, and he’s hella fucking tall. 6′5? are you kidding? you couldn’t have at least been short so we could make fun of you?
oh yeah and his laugh-
it is now 4:53 am and a bitch is tired but i have an entire fucking train of thoughts and they must be somewhere before they slip away
the next part- Eret. i adore Eret. so incredibly much. and let me start this by saying i’m going to consistantly call him a he, because he doesn’t care and so that makes it easier for me. ok? ok.
he is the opposite of Wilbur in this one regard, confidence. and self-esteem. eret loves himself. that attitude spreads. look, not only is he like the #1 bicon in the world as far as i’m concerned, but he also actively fucks gender roles any day. strawberry dress pog? strawberry dress pog.
but seriously, he rocked the strawberry dress. and the suit, though i missed that stream. he rocks his crown, his sunglasses, just anything he puts on. and don’t get me started on the BOOTS
(im started on the boots) so firstly the heel boots, the first ones he got. when i first saw clips, my only thought was something like ‘woah.’ or maybe ‘damn.’ at that point i didn’t know much about him, just that he looked STELLAR in those boots (and the betrayal and shit yknow) and the PLATFORMS DUDE
the platforms are the same but moar tall, which is incredible. oh and now back to strawberry dress- have you seen him twirl? the twirl? hello? have you seen it? you must.
also i havent even talked about HIM yet. hove you seen that picture of him with a bird on his shoulder? he is facing the bird, i think looking at it, with a wide smile across his face. and it is so pretty. he has the prettiest smile.
also today i was looking for flour at the store place and a clip of him was playing in my mind- he was doing like an announcer voice, like in every superhero movie trailer- and he was just coming up with something to say, and what he ened up saying was ‘in a world... where.... cookies.... are made of pringles’ and OMFG its making me laugh even now. like of absolutely anything, that was the example he made. just thinking about it is making me smile.
speaking of, have you heard his voice? his normal voice is really really deep anyways, but he has crazy range- he can effortlessly(i originally wrote effortly and when i noticed i laughed because i am so fucking tired bfv9wuocl) go from like an elmo impression (and a good one) to a just REALLY low voice, lower than his normal low voice.
AND HIS SINGING VOICE! he doesn’t like actually make music like wilbur but on that one stream where he did kareoke (how the fuck is it spelled) with fundy and his voice is SO LIKE its deep and its just pretty and i never want to hear normal sweater weather ever again, just him singing it.
i think this is where i’m done with eret- it is 5:18 now, and a BITCH IS TIRED but i need to finish this while i’m still feeling this wayy or i’ll never finish it, i know this from experience.
and now it’s tommy time
the og reason i decided to make this an actual post . but i had to explain the simping thing before i got into my thoughts about tommy.
but let me start this with just saying yes, i love him. he is a big man and i want him to be happy. which is the topic for today’s discussion, AHEM.
so tommyinnit, right? he is 16, which is why i do NOT simp.i dont care that im also a minor, i wouldn’t do anything to make him feel uncomfortable, ever. in any world. never. because look- i dont know how to put it, but tommy is SIXTEEN. still young and impressionable and all that junk. and he is a fairly fucking famous twitch streamer. he does that almost daily.
what i’m saying is i dont want him to get hurt. him, and tubbo too. they are a part of the world, part of the public, all the time. don’t you think that is stressful? do you guys remember his haircut stream? on the day of his haircut? and chat was making fun of him for it, and wilbur was making fun of him for it. that is how i express affection, with my real friends as well. playful bullying. but at some point while Will was teasing him, he says something along the lines of ‘yeah, the big man hasn’t been having too great a day’ or something like that, and dude, my heart dropped.
a. he had mentioned earlier that he didn’t want to stream the day of his haircut because hair is always weird that first day, but since he hadn’t streamed in a good bit he felt obliged to. i dont really.. idk, i dont really like that. i dont want him to have to put himself in uncomfortable situations because he feels like he needs to for us. i don’t think that is healthy.
and b. chat and wilbur were bullying him. good-naturedly, but still, when he mentioned he had been having a bad day, the chat turned around and instantly started yelling shit like ‘AHHHH SORRY BIG MAN YOUR HAIR IS FINE’ and when Wilbur kept teasing him (you fucking beautiful bully man fuck off) yelling stuff like ‘WILBUR QUIT WE ARE H U R T I N G HIM’ and ‘WILL STFU HES HAVING A BAD DAY’ so im glad we all want him to feel ok
but still, it cannot be healthy. when i first got into MCYT, i though tommy was fucking loud and annoying. and he is! he is. but that is a big part of why i like him so much. and everyone jokes about him being a child, because he is, but i choose to not say stuff like that in chat just because i want him to be happy. those jokes are fun, but i want him to be happy. and he is happier when not being called a child.
im not attacking you, do whatever the fuck you want. i dont know why i feel the need to protect him or whatever, if he read this he would probably think i was hella creepy. i just- listen, i just want him to be happy. i just want him to smile and laugh. i sound SO GODDAMN CREEPY but- as ive said- i just want him to be happy.
is this literally just what having a comfort streamer is? am i not crazy? does everyone experience this? and can we talk about tommy’s playlist it’s literally so sweet and bubbly compared to his personality and i love that. and the song he always plays at the start of stream and always like buzzes along to? that moment in time is my very favorite.
it is 5:44-
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