#hinacu dc

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

We've talked about the batkids ending up on Bruce's zoom calls with JL and WE. And they are all amazing. But heres something i haven't seen: the batfam ending up on each other's hero team zoom calls

Dick trying to look a responsible and dignified leader only for Damian and Steph to crash through the room trying to kill each other for the last cookie. Tim trying to stay composed as Jason does a sequence of the most horrible dance moves known to man in the background. Dick slapping a mask on to interrupt Damian's call to ask something super embarrassing. Bruce trying to use which ever kid is on the call as a human shield while another kid comes in shooting a water gun

#hinacu dc #batfam #batman #dc #video calls #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #bruce wayne #batkids #please picture these guys in their masks but wearing pjs. thats what im envisioning #and imagine jason doing the sprinkler. tim wants to kill him. jason starts flossing

[hinacu-arts]

Just read through the entire Justice League Meets the Batfamily tag on ao3 again. Thinking of making my own fic since i have a ton of silly ideas...

#hinacu dc #justice league find out about the batfam #i need to finish FFPS first tho #parts of that are written but none of them are in the next chapter 😭 #justice league #batfam #dc

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Good tier: under truth serum Batman talks about his rogues with respect because thats honestly how he thinks

God tier: under truth serum Batman will not shut up about how much he loves his children because he's always thinking about them

#hinacu dc #batman #bruce wayne #batfam #truth serum #both are great #but batman not shutting up about his kids in front of the whole JL is better #''damain's getting so big-'' ''father.'' ''he's my baby i dont want him to get any bigger-'' ''FATHER''

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

I got bored so i did some research on Bruce Wayne's kids. Feel free to let me know if i missed any or wrongly added one (last updated April 2023)

Someone: how many kids do you have?

Bruce: legally, biologically, or emotionally?

The answer is 42 children

Key

bold = the "main" kids

* = at some point this timeline and/or universe was "erased" from existence

** = ambiguous universe (ex: was it a alt timeline or just a dream?)

Legally

aka adopted and/or fostered at some point in time

Dick Grayson

Jason Todd

Tim Drake

Cassandra Cain

Duke Thomas

Jarro

Alina Shelley (Batman: The Dark Prince Charming)

Lance Bruner* (Earth-One)

Turner Hayes (Gotham Knights)

Kal-El (Batman: Last Knight on Earth)

Roger Burnim Jr.* (Brave and the Bold #98)

Nyesha Burroughs Wayne** (Batman '89)

Stepchildren

Jackie Napier (mother: Harley Quinn) (Batman: White Knight)

Bryce Napier (mother: Harley Quinn) (Batman: White Knight)

Stephanie Trevor (mother: Diana) (Batman/Superman Generations)

Biologically

Mother = Talia al Ghul

Damian Wayne

Athanasia al Ghul (Injustice)

Tallant Wayne (Batman: League of Batman)

Ibn al Xu'ffasch (Earth-22)

Unnamed Son

Mother = Selina Kyle (Catwoman)

Helena Wayne (Earth-2)

Aion**

Bruce Wayne Jr.** (Batman ’89)

Tivali Wayne** (Batman ’89)

Mother = Diana (Wonder Woman)

Kull (Dark Nights: Death Metal)

"Batman" (JLA #90)

"Batwoman" (JLA #90)

Mother = Other

Bruce Wayne Jr. (mother: Kathy Kane) (Earth-154)

Bruce Wayne Jr. (mother: Unnamed Wife) (Earth-3839)

Kiki Wayne* (mother: Helen)

Genetically Engineered

Terry McGinnis (Batman Beyond)

Matt McGinnis (Batman Beyond)

Emotionally

aka other people Bruce has mentored/gotten attached to

Barbara Gordon

Stephanie Brown

Harper Row

Cullen Row

Carrie Kelly

Rui Aramiya (Batman and the Justice League)

Barbara Wilson (Batman and Robin (1997) movie)

Drake Winston (Batman ’89)

Mia “Maps” Mizoguchi

Claire Clover

#hinacu dc #batman #dc #batfam #bruce wayne #batkids #multiverse #dc multiverse #robin #batgirl #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #cassandra cain #barbara gordon #stephanie brown

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Justice League meet the Batfam au fic BUT the secret only gets out because Batman had a choice between staying quiet or acting on a truly golden opportunity to embarrass his son and like any father he chose embarrassment

#hinacu dc #dc prompt #justice league find out about the batfam #batman #justice league #bruce wayne #batkids #batfam #physical affection was involved #he traumatized GL more than the kid #the whiplash from Batman to Dad was to much for him #he needs to sit down

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Currently looking into which of the batkids canonically took the name Wayne (just Tim and Damian) and theres some comments on what ppl think Jason should've made his surname and this popped up in my head

Dick: so what's it gonna be? You staying a Todd or becoming a Wayne?

Jason: actually ive decided on a completely separate name

Dick: oh really

Jason: im gonna name myself after one of my favorite heroes

Bruce, leaning in expecting "Robin" or "Batson": and who's that

Jason: im gonna be Jason Wonders

Bruce: ...Wonders?

Jason: yeah. After Wonder Woman

Bruce: *in shock at the feel of utter betrayal*

Dick, choking back laughter: i was gonna suggest "Grayson" as a joke and revealing it as a surprise to piss Bruce off but this is so much better!

alternatively

Jason: i dont want to be Todd and i refuse to be a Wayne

Jason: and i sure as hell wont be a Grayson or a Drake

Jason: i guess that means im Jason Pennyworth now

...

Jason: hey Alfred check out my new drivers license

Alfred, trying not to cry: you've chosen well Master Jason

#hinacu dc #jason todd #alfred pennyworth #batfam #dick grayson #bruce wayne #red hood #dc #wonder woman

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Damian gets dosed with some kind of "truth serum" that turns off his brain to mouth filter. Bruce cries when he finds out Damian calls Bruce "Baba" in his head and only uses "Father" to sound more mature

#hinacu dc #damian wayne #truth serum #bruce wayne #batfam #batman #dc #now what does he call his siblings? #bc he absolutely has nicknames for them but refuses to admit it

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Random meet the batfamily reveal situations i dont see enough of so have some examples/prompts

The JL: Batman is truly terrifying. No one has the guts to lie to his face

The JL: *video calling the batcave*

FEW MINUTES LATER

Spoiler: *walks across the room and is seen as she passes behind Batman*

The JL: wait! Its you!

Batman: Spoiler, why and when did you have contact with the Justice League?

Spolier, no hesitation: i have never met these people in my life

The JL: WHAT? What are you talking about?!? We saw you two days ago

Spoiler: wasn't me. I don't know what to tell you, you must've saw someone else

------------------------------------

Batman: *turns on his camera for the JL zoom call*

THE BATCAVE IS COVERED IN GLITTER

The JL: uh, Batman?

Batman: *steamrolls right into the meeting material so he doesnt have to talk about falling for a prank*

-------------------------------------

THE WATCHTOWER CELLS, WHICH HOLD THE MAJORITY OF THE BATKIDS

Batman: what happened?

The JL: well this group broke into the Watchtower and put Green Arrow and Green Lantern in the infirmary! They refuse to tell us who they work for or how they got past security-

Batman: *trying not to laugh because he is pissed that they broke into the Watchtower and possibly compromised them all but the image of Lantern and Arrow sitting next to each other in matching bandages like cartoon characters is hilarious*

Batman: i can answer one of those questions. This group typically works with me. They are supposed to be stationed in Gotham right now.

The JL: WHAT

Batman: Nightwing, what could not be accomplished at the cave that this many of you needed to come here?

Nightwing: well, uh, you see...

Batman: Robin, why are you all here?

Robin: there was a... incident in Agent A's kitchen. It is no longer usable. We are here seeking asylum from his wrath.

Batman: *facepalms*

The JL: *gasps at the facepalm*

Batman: one of you blew up the microwave again, didn't you?

Robin: i will neither confirm or deny that claim.

-------------------------------------

THE JL STAND SURROUNDED BY DEBRIS. A EXPLOSION GOES OFF IN THE BACKGROUND.

Batman: *dealing out his children's punishment*

The JL: damn he's really giving it to them

Orphan: *hugs Batman's arm and gives him puppy eyes*

Batman: *speech falters but he keeps going*

Nightwing: *comes up behind Orphan and rests his chin on her head, also giving puppy eyes*

Batman: *speech begins to taper off*

Signal: *starts faking a leg injury and claims to be exhausted*

The JL: no, he's not gonna FOLD is he?

Robin: *refuses to stoop so low as to use these tactics but is adorably sulking behind them*

Batman: *folds like a house of cards and the kids get off mostly free AND with hugs*

The JL: *are flabbergasted*

-------------------------------------

JL SCREEN IS COMPROMISED DURING A MEETING AND IS NOW DISPLAYING A VIDEO CALL

The JL: how did you hack our security?! It's the best in the world

Red Robin, clearly exhausted: i built your security you fu-

Batman: Red Robin. What can we do for you.

Red Robin: answer your damn phone when i call you.

The JL whispering: who does this guy think he is?

Red Robin: we're out of coffee. I need you to swing by the store on your way back or just steal some before you leave.

The JL: you interrupted our very important meeting because you want Batman to go grocery shopping for you!

Batman and Red Robin: no coffee is a emergency.

Red Robin: *cracks open a five hour energy*

Batman: please don't-

Red Robin, making direct eye contact: *pours five hour energy into a can of monster*

Red Robin: desperate times call for desperate measures, B

------------------------------------

Nightwing: it's freezing out here.

Nightwing: *pushes Superman aside so he can wrap Batman's cape around him*

The JL: uhh

Batman: i told you to bring a jacket.

Nightwing: jackets limit my mobility. And last time i brought one it got slashed to pieces and i had to buy a new one. I cant do that every time it gets cold!

Batman: *sighs*

The JL: did Batman just sigh in defeat??!!?!!!??

------------------------------------

Oracle, interrupting a meeting: Batman. It's been four hours.

Batman: i am aware. Thank you Oracle.

Oracle: you need to eat, B.

Batman: i am fine.

Oracle: then you shouldn't have a problem eating. I know there are snacks in your belt.

The JL: is Batman getting bullied by his own AI?

Oracle: i am not a AI. And i will hold up this meeting until you eat.

Batman: *grumpily pulls out a granola bar and starts eating*

------------------------------------

Red Hood: *marches right through the Watchtower and up to Batman*

Red Hood: you did not tell Robin to "just watch" Pride and Prejudice!

Batman, calmly turning in his chair: i did, yes.

Red Hood: i can't look at you right now. I don't know if i can ever look at you again.

Batman: the one i recommended is praised for it's faithful adaptation-

Red Hood: it's not the same! There is no substitute for reading a Jane Austin work!

Red Hood: next you'll tell me you've never read it

Batman: *silence*

Red Hood: YOU'VE NEVER READ JANE AUSTIN?!

Red Hood: get your stuff, we're leaving.

The JL: where are you going?

Red Hood: to a bookstore!

Red Hood: i'm coming over for lunch tomorrow and you better be at least one chapter in. You hear me, B?

Batman: Hn

#hinacu dc #batfam #justice league #justice league find out about the batfam #batman #bruce wayne #batkids #dc prompt

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

I'm half asleep and ive been reading time travel fics have this funny idea

DICK AND WALLY GET SENT TO THE PAST/A ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WHERE THEY ARE YOUNGER. THEIR YOUNG SELVES AND TEAMMATES JUST FOUND OUT THAT THEY'RE MARRIED

P! Dick: why are you kissing him?!

Dick: ...because he's my husband?

P! Dick: HE'S YOUR WHAT

Dick: my husband

P! Dick: WHY IS HE YOUR HUSBAND

Dick: because i like kissing him

....

P! Wally: how did you end up married to Robin?!?!?!

Wally: tax reasons

P! Wally: what- how- why?!

Wally: well, it all started when my first wife-

P! Wally: THIS ISNT YOUR FIRST MARRIAGE?!?!

....

Dick: excuse you my ass looks fantastic! Wally, defend my honor!

Wally: no

Dick: i want a divorce

Wally: can't. We didn't sign a prenup

P! Someone: prenup?

Wally: yeah, Robin over here is loaded

Dick: im not rich, my dad is rich

Wally: filthy rich. And wow you did not just say that. Well since you insit it isnt your money, when he dies for real it'll be offically yours

P! Wally: omg future me married Robin for his money and is gonna kill him for it

....

P! Wally: i still don't get it. I can't picture myself dating Robin at all

Wally: *grabs P! Wally's face in both hands* *leans in looking very seriously*

Wally: he gets really, really, REALLY hot in a few years

P! Wally: but-

Wally: REALLY HOT Wally!

#hinacu dc #no idea if this is in character but its funny so im sharing #birdflash #wally west #dick grayson #dc #time travel #time travel au

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Bruce: *writing furiously during JL meeting*

Bruce, whispering: pass this to Green Lantern

Superman: ✉️🤚

Wonder Woman: ✉️🤚

Black Canary: ✉️🤚

Green Arrow: ✉️🤚

Flash: ✉️🤚

Hal: *opens note*

NOTE: "get out of my justice league"

Hal: what the hell?!

#another thing that would be funny to draw but i wont so have it in quote format instead #batlantern #bruhal #hinacu dc #incorrect quotes #source: twitter #bruce wayne #hal jordan #green lantern #batman #justice league #hinacu meme

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Prompt

Bruce is beyond happy that Dick wants to be formally adopted, as Dick was legally his ward/foster son during his childhood. They go through with adult adoption and Dick hits the news as the last (ironically) Wayne to be adopted

Bruce eventually realizes he's in the same boat with Alfred as he was with Dick. Theres a heartwarming moment. They decide to go for adult adoption as well. They announce it on twitter with no previous media attention. In a even more ironic twist of fate, the last Wayne to be adopted is actually Bruce

#hinacu dc #batfam #dc prompt #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #dick grayson #batfamily #batman #nightwing #dc #batclan #adult adoption is IN FACT a thing and i think thats wonderful

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

AU where the justice league are actually a bunch of tik tok ppl who do comedy sketches. Like Clark got drunk one day and decided to run around in his underwear pretending to be invincible and it went viral so now he posts "Superman" sketches. Barry put on a stupid costume and used double speed to pretend he was a speedster as a joke and people ate it up. Diana wanted to prove you can fight in any dress and slowly earned the moniker "Wonder Woman" which was solidified when she did a crossover episode and now she's just having fun with it. Bruce is so dedicated to Batman and then his kids made their own personas and it spiraled out of control. Alfred was in the background of enough of them he's now considered a character. The Shazam videos are full of purposefully bad effects and everyone loves them. The first time Bruce flys out to Metropolis and makes a crossover ep with Clark tik tok goes nuts

#hinacu dc #hinacu au #tik tok au #dc comics #superman #batman #wonder woman #flash #shazam #clark kent #bruce wayne #diana prince #barry allen #billy batson

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Justice League Find Out About The Batfam trope but they dont realize that they're actually related. Like they call Batman "batdad" and "daddybats" and he calls them his "children" but the JL interpret it as like a joke. And the kids call each other siblings but the JL think they mean it in the brothers-in-arms way. So the JL are just excited that Batman is capable of "joking around" even if its just with teenagers who roast him constantly. And then they find out no Batman actually has 11ish children and they all fight crime in some capacity bc Batman cant stop them

#hinacu dc #dc prompt #batfam #batman #justice league #justice league find out about the batfam #dc #jl #batclan #batkids

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

I see your "the JL thinks Nightwing/Robin is Batman's husband because Batman calls him 'my partner'" fics and raise you "the JL overhear many convos between the Bats where 'Agent A' is mentioned in a domestic fashion and assume Agent A is Batman's wife"

#hinacu dc #batfam #batman #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #justice league #justice league find out about the batfam #''what has agent a made for dinner'' ''agent a sent me to collect you'' ''agent a will need to repair the suit'' #the fact i have yet to stumble upon a fic where ppl assume ''agent a'' is batman's housewife or at least the kids' mother is surprising

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

As you all know i love Justice League Meet The Batfamily au fics. And i was thinking about how i havent yet read one focusing solely on Signal. Heres one idea on how it could go

Im thinking a au where the JL know Batman has Gotham associates to a extent (aka that he has some, no one knows how many, theres "Robin" but Robin is obviously switched out by another person every few years, etc) and maybe they know Nightwing but thats it. The extended batclan are playing assassin. And Duke gets Bruce. Which is majorly daunting. And pretty much a guaranteed failure. Duke is disappointed but decides to give it his all anyways

Now, there are ofc rules. One is you cant get anybody at work or school. However, "work" only applies to day jobs. Night time escapades are fair game. So Duke targets Bruce where he'll feel safest: the Watchtower. Its basically off limits for the kids. Does that break some rules? Yes. But it doesnt break any of the assassin rules and therefore the defeat will still count

Duke has to recruit some help, obviously. Babs is absolutely down for this. She messes with the zeta to not announce him and does some other stuff. Maybe causes a annoying distraction? Maybe helps make it look like there is a intruder onboard and helps Signal pick off members one-by-one like a horror movie? Maybe Duke just sits in a vent for 4 hours? Maybe another batkid shows up and starts a scene so Batman is focused on parenting them while standing surrounded by his colleagues so he wont feel there is a threat?

Either way Duke shoots Bruce with half a canister of yellow paintballs when no one was expecting a attack/a gun fight

Bruce is shocked. He's just looking at his hand where his fingers touched "the wound" aka the paint. Everyone is either stunned in silence or screaming bc Batman is down

And Signal comes out in the open with the paintball gun on his shoulder all smug. And theres commotion before Batman starts laughing. Everyone looks over. And Bruce just wades through the JL before reaching Duke. Congratulates him, Bruce beaming with pride, and Batman hugs him. Commotion once more: "what just happened!?" "Who is this?" "Is Batman hugging?!" I like it when ppl write Bruce as affectionate around his kids so maybe its a excited swaying hug where Bruce is laughing as he pulls Duke to him and drops a kiss on his head. One of his kids managed to get the drop on him! he's ecstatic! This is a milestone moment!

and maybe then whover has Duke as a target shoots him right as everyone calms down

#hinacu dc #justice league find out about the batfam #batfam #duke thomas #bruce wayne #batman #the signal #prompt #dc prompt

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

au where the JL finds out about both the contingency plans and the batfamily at the same time

Does the shear amount of deeply personal betrayal secrets make it the breaking point between JL and Batman? Did something happen to the batfamily that forced the batfam into using contingency measures? Does Batman leave the JL because the JL went after his (unknown at the time) children? Do the JL and batfam only meet bc thats the contingency plan Batman had put in place for Batman?

#hinacu dc #batman #justice league #batfamily #justice league find out about the batfam #so many ideas