#hilarious because they suck at it

[shepscapades]

Doc: I have impossibly high standards.

Xisuma: [exists]

Doc, frantically texting Tango: Help, he's meeting all of my standards!

He never quite addresses what his standards are and wether or not xisuma is meeting them

#dbhc #dbhc ask #ask #daredevils-advocate #dbhc doc #dbhc tango #DFNBSFGKBDFJGB doc taking the mick out here #poor tango #it’s hilarious I haven’t talked about it yet but tango actually comes to doc for relationship advice #WELL #advice in general #because he is NOT well after double life #mentally. or something #anyway this is very funny #doc listens to him go on about how everything kinda sucks and how there’s this guy he’s probably never gonna see again and docs like. #huh. crazy. good thing I don’t feel that way about anyone #dbhc sillies

[tio-trile]

Did you hate the season 2 finale? Are you still looking forward for season 3 because of it or are you turned off of looking forward for any tv show good omens from now on?

What season 2 finale? Good Omens has never been adapted into a TV show. I love the book tho!

#I'm craaaaaaazzzzyyyyyyy ahahahahahahahaha #In seriousness to answer your question #Of course I hated it! Every book fan I know hated it! #The past few days has really sucked with miscellaneous Good Omens and also work stuff and it's just shit it's shit it's shit #I hope season 3 never happen now! I think it'll be hilarious that this is the final ending that show fans get :D #All my friends have been getting my full rant for the past few days #Anyways that was so bad and OOC I've been avoiding Tumblr for the past few days #Because every time I came on I have to fight back the strong urge to delete all my show Omens art #And I've promised myself I wouldn't delete my art under any circumstances before because I used to hate when artists I like did that #Anyways I'm not gonna delete art. But I probably wouldn't post anything Show Omens related from now on. Unfollow me if you want #good omens critical

[kuzann]

Reasons I have a hard time taking canon Vlad 100% seriously:

His nemesis is a freaking 14 year old this is self-explanatory

Keeps getting beaten/outsmarted by a gaggle of teens

Blew up his own house because he couldn't be bothered to do general maintenance on a piece of very valuable and potentially explosive lab equipment

Got bodied by Jack that one time and decided to never fight him again, Jack is canonically 1-0 in a direct 1v1 fight against Plasmius and that is too funny

Gets bodied by his own idiot schemes

Somehow couldn't figure out how to hire a hitman to take out the guy he's hated for years and sends the one thing Jack is supposed to be good at fighting to do the job instead. Are you trying to fail, Vlad?

Got eaten by a monster that one time. Embarrassing.

Did not do his homework when it came to how strong a ghost was at least twice and endangered the entire world and Ghost Zone because of this

In the bad timeline he caused the apocalypse because he is that bad at parenting and somehow didn't think to just send the kid to therapy and grief counseling instead of jumping straight to the mad scientist shit

There's probably more but these are the ones I can think of at the moment. Like he's absolutely done horrible things, no question about it, but then I remember the above and I'm just. All I can do is laugh.

#Danny Phantom #Vlad Masters #Vlad Plasmius #Character Analysis?? I guess??? idk #Maybe it's more of a shitpost #Do not ever ask me to take canon Vlad seriously #I can't #Just. LOOK AT HIM! #He's an idiot and a disaster and his failure rate is ridiculous #Every time he acts threatening it's just undermined by how much of a moron he is #He just sucks! #Danny and co. are only alive BECAUSE of this #I love him for it #It's hilarious #He's one of my favorite characters in the show #But I ain't gonna take him seriously #Vlad shares the title of “Dumbest Smart Guy You Will Ever Meet” with Jack imo #I say all this with the utmost affection for the character cause again he's one of my favs #I feel like a lot of fanon just flat-out ignores how dumb he is in the show so it can make him more scary #Which there's nothing wrong with that you do you boo it's fandom have fun! #But it's just not Vlad to me without the idiot streak

[poisoned-pearls]

❗❗❗❗❗❗

BOTHERING YOU!!! I AM INTERESTED!!!

AUGHH OKAY OKAY SO-

It’s INCREDIBLY similar to canon, that’s like, half of the point. Jamil and Azul have been in the same class for their whole school a career and I firmly believe Azul has HAD a crush on him since their first year even in canon (ex. “I’ve always been curious about you since we were first years.”)

so in this au it happened completely on accident. Since they were only around 3 weeks- a month into school, Jamil didn’t have kalim to worry about yet (who arrived a month later) and azul didn’t have such a large reputation (so Jamil was a little less cautious). Potion project, truth serum. Should be easy right? That was until azul accidentally lost balance and tried to catch himself on the cauldron, sending it all over him and into his mouth.

so when Jamil leans over to ask if he’s okay, because a giant metal thing just tipped over him, the first thing out of his mouth is “great seven you’re gorgeous.”

when Jamil is promptly like “what” Azul literally can not control his tongue and is like “please go on a date with me-“ and Jamil just stares at him for a moment before going “…sure” because, well, hell. He’s free from kalim for the first time in his life, he thinks he’s pretty too, it’s worth a shot and he’s under a truth potion, so at least he knows he finds him attractive. So sure, couldn’t hurt to try.

And it did, in fact, not hurt to try, they snuck their way up the astronomy tower and had a nice dinner that azul made. And they were both, very very happy.

another date later (this time by Jamil, where they played mancala in one of the scarabian common places) and they were official.

And a month later, (a week or so after kalim transferred) Jamil joined basketball and Azul became his number one fan, where a year later Ace learns about his existence from

Azul keeps Jamil from becoming more stressed about kalim, and Jamil uses his study guides to not go insane. Jamil also becomes a third enforcer for the monstro lounge, and knows EXACTLY how everything works, because hell he was there right next to Azul and helping him figure it all out when it was happening. He’ll catch someone trying to run from Azul and his contracts and toss them right back into the shark pit.

theyre also horrible. Like the most couple to ever couple. Jamil waits outside every housewarden meeting to walk with Azul, they always either bring breakfast or coffee for each other (they’ll switch it up on who brings it each day). Hell even Ace originally knew Azul as “Jamil’s boyfriend from octavinelle” during games.

#Also I think that Azul wouldn’t overblot (because Jamil would seriously help with his self esteem and because JAMIL SHOULD PUNCH LEONA-) #Listen I’m not a Leona hater #But I didn’t like him during book 3- #Listen I’m sorry I just can’t sympathize that strongly with a guy who is still rich as hell and royalty #You don’t have to work #I don’t feel that bad for you not being king #Jamil probably would still overblot but I have angst for that #Angst you’d probably like actually #You know when you were thinking about Jamil feeling bad after his overblot?? #Imagine how he’d feel knowing he chucked his boyfriend halfway across the desert #But yeah #the sillies #id also think it’d be FUCKING HILARIOUS for canon Jamil to meet this jamil #“Oh shit the magic is all messed up- give me a second I need to call my bf to make sure he’s okay” #“Your what” #“My… boyfriend? What you don’t have one?” #“NO????” #“Life must suck for you then.” #“What? You think I need someone to be happy?” #“Well are you?” #“…” #(He feels bad because he doesn’t get Azul and weighted blanket cuddles when he’s sad) #(He feels bad thinking about all of the bad mental episodes Azul’s helped him through) #After Jamil figures out the other version of him is dating Azul he’s like “Him?? That schemer-??” #He insults him so much other Jamil is like “listen I don’t care if your me I can only take so many insults to my boyfriend before I just #Fight you.” #Jamil vs jamil #jamil viper #Azul Ashengrotto #jamiazu

[crazylittlejester]

yo everyone share what crazy thing happened to you today because NO ONE i know had a normal day?? I’ll go first: I woke up with no hearing in my left ear and minimal hearing in my right, it then came back in the middle of the day randomly, and now it’s gone again lmao 🫶

#im fine #the fanfic authors curse just decided TODAY was the day i must suffer for my sins #not being able to hear sucks ass tho #i will admit- #but in all honesty did anyone have a normal day because i saw someone on here’s oven exploded #i dunno if this a vent or just me complaining #like im fine and this is all hilarious #but it does suck #jes talks #jes rambles

[qqueenofhades]

...so Twitter is DYING dying this weekend, huh

#hilary for ts #condolences to everyone losing their online community/job because of one psychopathic billionaire #we make jokes but i know it sucks for a lot of reasons

[cutter-kirby]

regarding intermezzo: funniest fucking thing the bloodstained birthday boy's ever done btw

#also when he said '[arthur] i want you...' i thought for a hilarious second he would've just stopped there #anyway DIVORCE 10 MILLION TIMES!!!!!! #giving kayne his own nickname because why is his name spelled like this :| #malevolent #malevolent spoilers #HE WAS SO FUNNY FOR refusing to erase artie's memory after he fucking offered. he's such an incurable prankster 🤪 #kayne after ruining arthur and john's friendship and sending them back 700 fucking years: 😂😂🤪🤪 #also my eyes went wide at the coda reference. What Do You Know About Us Sir????? #he sucks so bad. favorite character <3

[hechiima]

It's hilarious that herlock keeps beating sherlock in the detective polls but also I think ppl keep misunderstanding Holmes. Though I don't think sholmes is particularly faithful to the source material, a lot of traits that makes sholmes wonderful (little freak, The Climbing, Dramatique) are also present in Holmes. They would either be besties or drive each other insane, depending on the circumstances.

If mikotoba and watson left them alone at a crime scene they would probably come back to find that sholmes and holmes had somehow gotten onto the roof to inspect something. Poor doctors would just have to stand there worriedly praying that their respective detectives didn't fall down as they scampered around up there like overgrown squirrels.

#that said one massive advantage sholmes has over holmes is dilfhood #dgs and the great mouse detective both understood the best thing to do with holmes is give him babby #i think the damage bbc sherlock has done to the franchise still lingers which sucks #because the original source material and a lot of adaptations are a ton of fun #anyways i love both of them and i think they should hang out #tom talks #sherlock holmes #herlock sholmes #dgs #yujin mikotoba #also for transparency i have been voting sholmes because i think it's hilarious but #just some of the comments its like well... #dgs2 spoilers #john watson

[grabyoursaintsandpray]

#I've giffed the hell out of season 11 #moving on to dead city #because i felt like a rewatch #The lighting in this show sucks for GIFs #Negan trying to rile Maggie 24/7 like its a job #Hilarious that he has to sit in the truck bed #no front seat privileges #twd dead city #negan smith #maggie greene #dead city #neggie #maggie rhee #negan

[gyzym]

JONATHAN HARKER: Oh god. Oh no. Count Dracula has asked me to write post-dated letters claiming that I am fine, not dead, and leaving his castle any day now. Surely he means to murder me! And his tone when he said it… how can I possibly capture that in my journal, on the off-chance that someone should find it once I am dead and send it home to my dear Mina? What words shall I use to communicate the singular way in which he spoke to me?

JONATHAN HARKER’S JOURNAL: Last night the Count asked me in the suavest tones to write three letters…

#dracula daily #(tagging for spoilers - a truly hilarious phrase to type about a book that was published in 1897 - but here we are) #just truly cracks me up that jonathan's like 'well he's gonna kill me for sure BUT he WAS suave as hell about it' #now to employ my real vampire tag which from now on is just going to be #suck blood and fuck forever #for all vampire media #because wwdits really gets it right.

[nethnad]

still thinking about this post by @doing-90mph-in-central-london and i think i just determined the perfect retirement plan for david tennant. because i mean other than the doctor and the master... how much strenuous activity does playing a time lord really require? it's all monologues and standing ominously. by playing every time lord david tennant could literally just continue cameoing in doctor who until his hearts content without any threat of back pain and with all the fun dramatic monologues in the world. and we all know david tennant is fuckin awesome at dramatic monologues. really this would be enrichment time to him. i'm envisioning 80yo david tennant refusing to retire because why retire when he can cameo as coordinator narvin in the upcoming doctor who episode "the origin of the TARDIS keys of rassilon" or something in which he stands there and gives a few killer lines of dramatic exposition before walking off. anyways this would be his version of senior bingo night i think.

#in this plan he plays the master first and then drax because that is the most jarring combo i can think of #and the master still requires some activity. maybe toss the rani in there somewhere too i think david tennant would be a good rani #also key to this concept is that No Explanation is ever given to why david tennant is playing another time lord again #the closest explanation ever given is 'rassilon thought he sucked' and 'brax thought it'd be funny to steal his brothers face' #everybody else? no idea. they just regenerated like that i guess #honestly sometimes he might not even need to stand. brax could literally deliver his lines from an office chair hands folded #anyways i thought this concept was hilarious and i wanted to expand on it LMAO #doctor who #dw #david tennant

[aragornsrockcollection]

I ran out of space but this is from a letter Tolkien wrote trying to sell his publisher Milton Waldman on the Silmarillion and LotR, which Christopher Tolkien included as the preface in the published Silmarillion.

#look I’m all for death of the author #but I think it’s hilarious they pretend like they’re being respectful to Tolkien’s memory #when I guarentee his response to a second age show would be something like #‘um? why?’ #The Rings of Power #tolkien #the silmarillion #jirt #silmarillion #silm #jrr tolkien #Amazon #Amazon’s the rings of power #writing the novel Tolkien never wrote because he thought it would suck #I generally ignore Tolkien’s opinion when it clashes with my own #but I don’t pretend to do otherwise #or to be carrying on his legacy

[dualumina]

"Okay the first kiss is going to be here-"

<ends up writing it much earlier>

"O-okay well they're only going to reveal their feelings in this chapter-"

<much earlier>

(holding back tears) "S.. so the smut's g-going to start in-"

<even earlier>

#a funny #writing woes #so hilariously the reasons for each of them have all been different #the first (which has been published) was because of Clay being convinced that had to happen at that point #the second was both of us going ''okay they're both talking they both suck at talking about feelings but even they would figure it out'' #and then the third was Dual going ''actually... hang on if we just... (really subtle but clever way for one of them to hint they're DTF)'' #and then Clay responding with ''... 🤔 Given the current situation... Yeah that'd lead to smut alright'' #so congrats y'all are getting the smut earlier AND a bonus chapter! #also for slight clarification: the shift of where the first smut happens in the story is more drastic than the shift for the confession #not NECESSARILY that the smut happens before the confession

[erinsintra]

trying not to get into a pointless political argument today but reddit doesn't make it easy

#i fucking hate people who say poor countries are poor 'bEcAuSe tHeYrE cOrRuPt' #as if corruption was this sentient entity that sucks away freedom and infrastructure #or as if brown people had a genetic predisposition to being corrput and poor #fuck those guys #memes #explorepage #explore #funny #hilarious #meme #dumb shit #shitpost #shitposting

[naurasweetarudesu]

Something that I did with that Skarloey lineart

Dino mean day in javanese language. Ajur is from the word "Ancur" which mean ruined/destroyed. So Dino Ajur mean (MY) DAY IS RUINED.

Which what I'm feeling this past few day 🙃🙃🙃

#ttte skarloey #Dino ajur #We should name this series: Naura Tried to Draw Train and Failed Like a Fucking Loser #Kinda funny since not every indonesian speak javanese #Even the java people itself can't really speak it either nowaday #So someone thought that Dino in there is referring to Dinosaurs #Then they be like: What is ajur? Why do the dino ajur-ed? #And for me that's hilarious because i myself suck at speak javanese too- #It's kinda intended that i tried to make skarloey's face looks like fumo plush 🙂 #SweetaruArtwork

[starlit-mansion]

sometimes i still like to laugh at the romance book i tried to read that over-pitched being about people in their late 30 or early 40s, one of which was sober and unemployed because of a scandal, and the other was a divorcee with an extremely demanding job, and the book proceeded to be exclusively them reminiscing about their high school romance and recreating it by visiting old locations from their past together, the alcoholism was waved away whenever anyone else wanted to drink, the scandal had nothing to do with the character whatsoever, the divorcee and the ex had the most function besties coparenting relationship ever and the demanding job literally never came up from the first chapter to the middle of the book where i finally dropped it in disgust.

not only failed step one. but literally failed every other step

#it was. hilarious. i donated the book to goodwill #almost worth the bookstore price for being able to mock it alone #here's my problem. it's that really emotionally heavy stories can actually kind of ruin my mood because of the mood swings #but then you try to take in fluffy light stuff and it SUCKS ASS and is full of so much painfully unfunny wanna-be witty banter #and an absolute determination to never demand the slightest bit of thought from the audience that it also ruins my mood lmao #anyway. why even pitch me a romance story about 40 year old dudes when it's just about them remembering being teens #i came here for the 40 year old men part