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#hes such a wifeguy
shootingmorningstar · 1 month
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Was inspired by bambygourl’s fanart and a TikTok I saw. Dressing up as Roger and Jessica Rabbit for a costume party with Lucifer. I think he’d be all pouty and grumpy about dressing up as such a silly character and not a suave charming character. Especially since he’d take a look at the white button up, red trousers with suspenders, and blue bow tie with yellow polka-dots and see it as a fashion nightmare XD. And don’t get him started on the bunny ears and tail. Tho his mood is sufficiently uplifted when he sees the reader dressed up as Jessica Rabbit. Low cut red dress with a slit and all. Just imagine pulling on his suspenders or bow tie for a kiss, getting lipstick on his mouth and face, and cooing over how adorable and handsome her honey-bunny is.
I've been meaning to get to this request ever since I saw it because it is just so good. I'm definitely biased for anything Lucifer related but god this is just so cute. Anon, your brain is outstanding. I love pouty Lucifer. If you still have that tiktok on hand or ever come across it again, do you think you could send it my way .ᐣ
You didn't include what kind of request you wanted though, and my default is HCs -- but I couldn't help but throw in a little drabble based on them, too. Or, at least I intended it to be a drabble .ᐣ It got away from me, haha.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀Lucifer and Female Reader Dressing
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ Up As Roger and Jessica Rabbit ~
Lucifer is initially thrilled when you bring up wanting to attend a famous yearly costume party in Pride with him. A chance to show you off sounds amazing, and he's great with costumes. Just the thought of you two matching is enough to get him excited.
You seemed just as excited as he was -- in fact, he was even more excited when you told him you'd already had something in mind .ᐟ He's pestering you to tell him just what the costumes were as soon as the plan leaves your lips, but much to his displeasure, you refuse, saying you want to keep it a surprise.
You'd even managed to resist the very strongest puppy-dog eyes and pout. Impressive. He usually succeeds in getting his way with that one -- who could ever say no to that face .ᐣ Having exhausted his options, he sighs his defeat.
Well, nearly exhausted his options. He was entirely too ready to pretend that you'd won and snoop through your closet the second you walked away. Apparently his quick glance at said closet had given him away though, and with a quick deadpan stare alongside a scary sounding ❛ don't you dare. ❜ has his feet rooted to the floor.
Did his poker face really suck so bad .ᐣ He's definitely practicing it in the mirror later.
Ultimately, though, he trusts you completely and your choice in matching outfits is no exception, so he allows it to drop for now. There's still a few more days until the party, but that time could be spent much more productively by your side rather than whining about clothing.
That is, until the day of the party comes around and you bring out his outfit. You'd never seen Lucifer's jaw drop quite like that before and it takes iron will to stop yourself from giggling at his present state.
He doesn't understand the reference. Lucifer regrets his past decision to give humanity free will. It's obvious, even if he never seems to say it outright. He had given out such a precious gift and so much of humanity chose to abuse it, to be nothing but cruel. Looking at sinners and by extension humanity is just a terrible reminder of what he'd done, so he prefers to avoid it whenever possible. This quite often includes the media of the living realm -- he's never even heard about the movie, forget seeing it.
So without the full context, all he knows is that you've just handed him an absolutely atrocious outfit -- and to make it worse, you expect him to go out in it .ᐣ Seriously, he whinges, red overalls with a blue bow .ᐣ Rabbit ears .ᐣ And to make it worse, you won't even show him your outfit until he gets dressed .ᐟ He can't believe you're laughing.
He sounds completely and totally ridiculous, in your defense. Seriously, has he seen his regular outfit .ᐣ He looks absolutely stunning, sure -- but he also looks like he walked right out of a circus.
It says a lot, though, that despite the complete and total pity party he's currently throwing himself, he's beginning to shuffle into the costume anyway. He's grumbling the whole way, but the fact that he just doesn't have it in him to say no to you warms your heart.
You had been so, so eager about this party, and the way your eyes had shined like stars when you told him had long since burned itself into his heart.
wc ; 1.2k
His seemingly endless complaints had tapered off ever so slightly when you shimmied his grasp off of the ruby red suspenders sagging unbuttoned over his chest. By the time you take the fabric into your own hands his protests faded to little more than a mumble under his breath, and with the very first snap of a button in place under your gentle touch he'd quieted completely. Where a look of exasperation had reflected off his face seconds prior, in its place now is that of silent awe, his gaze trained on your every action. The gesture of intimacy is enough to leave Lucifer somewhat choked up, his heart still not used to receiving such acts of adoration and kindness. You tie the cornflower blue fabric adorned with tiny yellow spots into a bow to accentuate the costume and cover his hands briefly with your own as you slip the gloves onto his fingers.
Not twenty minutes had passed, and he finds his attitude regarding the ensemble shifting with every second you take to assist him into it. Each and every part of it looks ridiculous at best, but the thought of you picking it out solely for him has him warming up to the idea.
Declaring your work complete, you raise your grasp ever so slightly, palms holding each of his cheeks close, your thumbs rubbing soft little circles below his eyes. Your affections are sufficient only when finished with a kiss placed on his forehead. ❛ I'm going to go get dressed, okay .ᐣ No peeking. I promise I'll be right back. ❜
The way his wrists on instinct dart out to catch yours to bring you close to him again as you pull back nearly got you. He's extended his lips in a pout once more. You hate to leave him quite so sad looking but you know he'll appreciate what you have planned enough for it to be worth it.
Bathroom door shutting closed behind you, there's the smallest bit of lingering regret that he can't help you to get dressed like you had for him. The outfit itself takes you barely a few moments to slip into -- it's the makeup that requires precision, time and effort. His pacing around the bedroom is audible, impatient steps sounding into stomps, the sounds causing you to choke on a laugh. You need a steady hand for your eyeshadow and that's hard to maintain during an act quite as cute as this.
Nonetheless, your look is finished within half an hour and therefore Lucifer is put out of his misery. It's not a second after the door clicks open that his attention is caught, snapped to the light peaking out of the doorway. Stepping into the small hallway, your eyes are met with his own -- and the way his pupils widen as soon as he gets a glance of your dress makes both your efforts and his complaining worthwhile. His gaze takes you in from top to bottom, each detail enchanting him further. The dress so perfectly hugging your curves is crimson to match him and absolutely breathtaking -- and are you walking towards him .ᐣ Your strut does well to accentuate the slit stitched into the leg, your thigh tantalizing in its display.
Finally reclaiming your place beside him, one of your fingers reaches out, finding purchase under his chin -- and when you tilt his head up you swear you saw his eyes flash red. ❛ Hello, my darling husband, ❜ you coo, sending his already overloaded brain into a frenzy. Husband . . .ᐣ You wanted . . .ᐣ With him, really . . .ᐣ And although he's beginning to put the pieces together and clue in that such a term of endearment was part of your match, you seemed so happy to say it. He snaps his focus back onto just how stunning you look tonight, but the idea has firmly implanted itself into the depths of his mind.
Back into the present time, his hands have begun to roam -- he wants to commit every detail of you to memory, and that includes the feeling of your dresses fabric under his fingertips. His grasp is met with your own, for it's not long before you're pulling the straps of his suspenders, tugging him forward into a kiss. By the time he's recovered from his surprise enough to reciprocate, though, you're already beginning to pull away. He chases your lips with a whine but you've already moved on, pressing a kiss first to his cheek and then to his forehead. It's only when you offer him a small compact mirror does he understand -- each of your kisses has left behind a little bit of the lipstick you oh so painstakingly applied. Your marks on his face have left him entranced, desperately craving more.
A gasp rips itself from those same cherry red lips in surprise -- you weren't expecting him to summon forth his tail, much less wrap it around your midsection and use it to bring you closer. ❛ Kiss me again, ❜ He pleads, desperate and breathy. ❛ Anything for my honey bunny, ❜ you chime, matching the mark on his left cheek with one on the right. ❛ You just look so cute, ❜ between each kiss is another offering of praise and compliments, the blush left in your wake matching excellently. ❛ Who's my handsome bunny .ᐣ ❜
Your multitude of kisses has left Lucifer stunned and looking nothing short of angelic -- even more so than usual. You're fully intending on giving him several more, leaning in to do just that when the wall mounted clock besides you chimes a new hours arrival, alerting you to the time. ❛ Oh, dear. I'm very sorry, Mr. Rabbit, but I'm afraid we simply must be going. We don't want to be late, do we .ᐣ ❜
Fixing your lipstick takes all of a few seconds, leaving you free to grab a makeup wipe off the pouch resting atop your vanity and wipe all of the stains you'd adorned his face with away. A snap of his wrist catches yours just inches from his face, however, halting your plans in their tracks. Confused, you look to him for an explanation, a soft ❛ leave them. please .ᐣ ❜ being all he offers you. ❛ You're going to go to the party like this, love .ᐣ ❜ to which he nods sagely. He can't bear to part with them -- not when the lipstick marks are yours, not when they declare proudly that he is yours.
❛ If you say so, honey. ❜ You can't deny that the prospect leaves your heart fluttering. A grand, golden portal appears with a simple snap of his fingers and he takes your arm, now linked with his own in an attempt to usher you forward. He can't wait to show you off, to watch as other demons eyes glow green as they stare his way. You stay still, though, prompting him to look back at you with an air of confusion. It's then that you lean close, whispering ❛ be a good bunny and there will be more where that came from. too bad we'll have to wait until we come home, hmm .ᐣ ❜
Suddenly Lucifer can't wait for this party to be over.
I still can't believe I'd originally intended this to be 100 words and it ended up over a thousand. I can't help it, I'm so weak for anything Lucifer related. I'm half tempted to write an absolutely filthy post party part 2. If there's enough demand for it .ᐣ I just might.
As always, let me know what you think .ᐣ Hearing back from you guys keeps me motivated ~
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laidback-thrills · 3 months
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This is my son Ray all he do is eat kelp and love wife...
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heartscrypt · 1 year
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the softer side of things
(aka i feel like i always make jamil so pissed at azul in my art that i just wanted them to have some silly cutesy moments LOL)
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henreyettah · 1 year
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Foxhole 🦊🦊 🦊 🦊🦊 🦊🦊 🦊 🦊
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summers-pratt · 3 months
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You know what's insane bananas bonkerballs? After 118 years together, Spike STILL was getting Drusilla Valentines Day gifts. He is out there acquiring the most gaudy gorgeous necklace for his lady love after a century of acquiring gaudy gorgeous jewelry. Wife guy of all time.
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chipchopclipclop · 38 minutes
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HERE COMES DAREDEVIIIIIIIIL 💥🔥🦇
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ceilidho · 8 months
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hi sorry nobody has asked for these. but im back with more silly "knight simon is jealous of a puppy" headcanons. my man is showing up to church everyday like is it weird that i want my wife to pat me on the head and the poor priest has to be like no not really do you have any actual sins to confess mr knight who's killed a bunch of people and he's like no. listen to me talk about this dog. he can't even be mad about it because the dog is doing its job! his lady is smiling and she's protected and he's SEETHING about it. the dog loves him so so much and he also loves this dog but secretly he's taking the dog aside to be like can you do your job less efficiently. please. lays his head in her lap and is like tell me you love me more then the dog please. please. im not getting up until you tell me. and she's like ? and fusses about it bc his head is in her lap and she's flustered but she does say it eventually
the priest: "again, super weird, but not technically a sin"
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nebulotica · 10 months
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alhaitham be winning the idgaf wars until kaveh ‘ the exception ‘ kshahrewar walks in the door and it’s sooo funny
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mac-n-cheese-art · 5 months
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so ive been watching frasier,,,
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stupidsexygrizzop · 2 years
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the fight for ultimate malewife is happening over on twitter rn
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archaicden · 2 years
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babygirl actually
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rist-ix · 11 days
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I think it’s a hugeeee spoiler or not, but would Valtor tbhtbh marry bloom? Like, propose her, and do the whole thing, even just like they both together, and Darcy doing the ceremony. Or he don’t think that’s it’s necessary? Hope you doing good!
Gonna be honest, memes aside I don’t think marriage is necessarily the cornerstone in their relationship than it is in other fictional — or even real life — pairings.
Big part of that might be that Valtor, for one, lives outside of any official systems. There are villains that do crime but still kind of have a clear position in society (the Darkling is a General and coups his way to tsar-dom, most vampires in any vampire story do pretend to lead a somewhat normal life, villains with a royal title automatically has a rank that comes with a fitting one for their romantic partner etc.)
Valtor does not. His crimes are motivated by pettiness and his hunger for power, he builds up political figures to do his dirty work when it’s practical, but does not have any political ambitions for himself — he doesn’t wanna be king of the cosmos, he just wants to be the most powerful, and that everyone knows it. He's kind of a cryptid that way, because he appears, wrecks shit, and leaves as he pleases. The most official thing in his life was probably his imprisonment on omega, and marriage tends to very much be an official kind of thing in nature, even if it’s held in private and off the record. Official-ity IS kind of the purpose.
The only real power Valtor seems to believe in is, well, power. And they already do have a magical connection, which I think would be more important and meaningful to him than - what he considers to be - a social ritual.
Add to that that Bloom is a guardian fairy, very grounded in day-to-day life, and a princess, where marriage tends to have political implications, and I don’t think she herself would be very interested in putting a legally defined term on their relationship, unless we're talking about a redeemed Valtor maybe.
That being said!
I am not very set in this headcanon! I'm pretty sure pulling a marriage off in a fic would be MORE than doable, and really interesting on top. It's just not very intuitive for me, so I’m gonna stick to the plan and go with my gut. Doesn’t mean it’s not gonna happen in a future fic, or that it’s not a really cool concept.
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cyberdragoninfinity · 3 months
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fond of transmasc yuboy hcs myself but i especially like he/they yugo in the vein of "guy who just found out about pronouns and theyre really stoked about it." like oh fuck theres more than two?? trans boy+??!? you can do that??!?! WHOA!! IM nonbiney??? SO COOOL. griffin_mcelroy_oh_shit_this_thing_has_different_colors.jpg type beat.
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gaymothperson · 3 months
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I love that multiple lesbians have stopped what they are doing to wax poetic about Palamedes Sextus' eyes. That's just how pretty they are.
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strrwbrrryjam · 5 months
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love was created when Tangled (2010) came out
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klanced · 10 months
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also................keith internally: should the suns of the universe conspire and die together as one i shall not be afraid for i have my warmth, i have my light. out of my reach, yes, but the burning inside me matches nonetheless. lance internally: oughhh keith shoulders...... :333
lance when he has a crush: im gonna be so cool about this. so casual. like dating is all about having funnnnnn right like im here for a good time not a long time 😎👍🏼 (<- literally only ever dates with the intent for marriage)
keith when he has a crush:
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