#guess who's been watching a lot of ds9 lately

[wellsbering]

#guess who's been watching a lot of ds9 lately #pel #quark #deep space nine #st: ds9 #ds9 #st #star trek #star trek: deep space nine #ds9: rules of acquisition #ds9 season 2 #90s trek #90s #sci fi #gaslight gatekeep girlboss #manipulate mansplain malewife #quark ds9 #pel ds9 #ferengi #my posts

[calliecat93]

ST: TNG S6 Watchthrough Episodes 14-17

Face of the Enemy: Troi has been kidnapped and forced to look/pose as a Romulan officer. Why? The one responsible isn’t saying, but to say that she’s unhappy would be an understatement. As it turns out, Troi was abducted by a part of the resistance from Unification and they need a Starfleet officer in case their current plan goes south. They even mention Spock… IDK if I can see him approving of an abduction but maybe they just forgot to mention that he disapproved that part… then again I guess it makes logical sense. Eh, whatever. So… this is by far the best Troi episode that they’ve done thus far. She was kidnapped yes, but she is NOT playing the damsel-in-distress. She’s not victimized. She’s not sexualized. She’s not forced into a poorly conceived romance or undergoes anything gross/f*cked up. She has to act the part of a cold-hearted authoritarian among a ship of Romulans and she is freakin’ badass. Especially when she decides that she’s had enough going and thoroughly tells off her kidnapper N’Vek and that he will listen to her. 100% perfection. They even managed to make her empathic abilities useful. Did putting her in the uniform cause this? Did they get it out of their systems in Man of the People? IDK but I am all for it! It was also an awesome look into the Romulans and the going-ons on their ship, something we haven’t really gotten since TOS’ Balance of Terror, and all the Romulans are done very well. N’Vek kidnapped Troi but he did it for his cause and is a great morally grey character, and the female Romulan Commander Toreth is an excellent antagonist. Plus it’s nice to see more of the resistance and to see them within the Romulan ranks. It was an excellent episode and I freakin’ loved it~! Thank you show for giving Troi the badass episode that she deserves (even if it was this late in the show's run), now keep it up! 5/5.

Tapestry: Two Q episodes this season? Hell yes~! So… Picard dies. Welp. Q decides to take this to give Picard an offer: go back in time and undo his greatest regret, the incident that caused his artificial heart that he told Wesley about in Samaritan Snare. Back when he was a hot-blooded rebel who got himself into a fight that got him stabbed in the heart. In doing so, he now has a chance to correct all the wrongs and settle all he regrets in his life since that day. So up to this point, Q’s episodes since Q Who, while still entertaining and interesting, had been more light-hearted. Q still came off as an all-powerful being (Deja Q aside which him not being was the plot point), but his antics had been more comedic or light-hearted in comparison. In this episode, he’s acting like a trickster as per usual, but again more with the purpose to teach Picard a lesson. Why isn’t made very clear aside from maybe he just likes Picard (take that however way you’d like), but it’s nice to see this version of Q again while still utterly stealing the show. Picard got to undo the event… but would it have really turned out any better had it not happened? Would not making mistakes, having regrets, and making all the supposed ‘right’ choices when he should have had truly made a better impact in his present? That’s the funny thing about life, it’s easy to look back and go ‘if I had done this one thing differently, it would have been better’ and te desire to correct it is very powerful. But with mistakes comes the ability to learn. To grow. To mature. You’ll always have guilt and regrets, but you have to accept that this is what you chose and go about your life. Picard is a man full of thrown-away opportunities, pain, and so much more… but it also caused him to become a strong leader, intelligent, a risk-taker, and even with all his faults become a better person in his present day. Now obviously he doesn’t actually die, but he sure as Hell learned the lesson. The life he would have lead would have been unsatisfying, his old regrets replaced with new ones, and been unfulfilling for a man like himself. Now he can truly value the one that he has and the people in it. This was a fantastic episode. It’s crazy how Picard went from one of my least favorites to now one of my absolute favorites. His development and growth from a strict, aloof authoritarian to a much more reasonable father-like figure and much more humbled man and the captain has been excellent, and this episode just helps further that. The only real complaint is there’s not much time devoted to showing how his crew ended up without him, but that’s minor and doesn’t take anything away at all. Very well done~! 5/5.

Birthright: Okay, guess we got a second two-parter… and apparently it crosses over with DS9. Didn’t see that coming. But alrighty, I’m game~!

Part One: So the crew is on Deep Space 9 to assist in repairs of some incident involving the Bajorans and the Cardassians that I guess I’ll find out about when I get to the show. While there Worf is approached by an alien who informs him that his dead father? He may not be dead after all, having been kept in a Romulan prison. Worf doesn’t take it well. He ain’t the only one having daddy issues. While working with DS9‘s CMO Dr. Bashir, Data gets knocked out has a vision of Dr. Soong (a much younger one than in Brothers). Normally Data can’t dream so he’s pretty taken aback by this. So as a first part, this was pretty good. It sets up Worf’s plot well with him deciding to break into the Romulan camp to find out the truth and rescue the Klingons there. Data’s plot is overall nice. He’s never dreamed before so him trying to track down why is very understandable, especiallya after Picard suggests that he quit going through facts and try a more creative outlet to get his answers. So what happened? As it turns out Dr. Soong made it so that when Data reached a certain cognitive point, he would obtaint he ability to dream and he made an AI version of himself to talk to him. I guess he would have explained this to him in Brothers had Lore not shown up/had he not died. It was a really touching moment. Soong’s still not exactly the most ideal parent, but his AI copy seemed legit proud of how far Data’s come. Is it out of ego, legit parental pride, or both? That’s up for you to decide. As this is my first look at Bashir… so far I don’t have too manys torng opinions. he seems to act more liek a Science Officer or Engineer han a CMO, but he is cute and so far liekabe. He’s curious about Data, but doesn’t dehumanize him like Maddox in The Measure of a Man did, if anything he notes Data’s more human-like elements like being able to grow hair than any of the nuts and bolts. He seems pretty well liked from what I’ve seen int he fandom, so I’ll see how that holds when I reach DS9 but I like him so far. I do have some issues, but that more impacts the Overall so I’ll save it for there. So we end with Worf discovering his father’s true fate… and he’s informed by the Klingons there that he’s never leaving the camp. Welp. How will Worf get out of this one in Part 2? We shall see. 4/5.

Part Two: So what the heck is going on? Well, Worf’s father is infact dead, but there were captured Klingons. As they weren’t able to die with honor nor could they return home as it would dishonor their families (Klingons prefer death to capture), they chose to remain in the camp and live out the rest of their lives there. So now Worf is among multiple Klingons, the vast majority of which know nothing about their heritage, culture, and customs and had it outright demonized. To them, the lives they have are the norm and they have no desire to change it. Worf may have been out of touch with Klingons due to being raised on Earth, but at least he can explore it and get in touch with it. The ones in the camp? They can’t do that. They’re essentially in a gilded cage. Yeah, there's the argument that they achieved peace between Klingons and Romulans… by imprisoning said Klingons and demonizing their culture to them with the older Klingons allowing it. Though it seems it’s also because of broken spirits and the dishonor they’d have faced otherwise which is worst than death to them. There’s even one girl, Ba’el, who is half Klingon, half-Romulan… and despite what gets said I don’t get the sense that her parents' union was a fully consensual one. This was pretty good. Worf has found a group that like him were out of touch with their heritage, and he is now able to educate them and guide them. With all that’s happened and his struggle to be a true Klingon and find his way, this was really nice to have. He’s still clinging onto his hatred of Romulans and this episode isn’t going to help it dissipate, but at least it was addressed and Ba’el being upset at being judged due to how she was born was very much justified. Heaven knows that the themes here are still very much relevant in today’s time. Worf’s guidance pays off in the end and at last, they can be free. The younger Klingons have a rough road likely ahead of them since we know that Klingon society isn’t exactly the easiest to get through, but at least they have a chance at freedom. It was a very strong Worf episode and it was great to see~. 4/5.

Overall: Okay, so overall… it’s pretty uneasy. The Worf parts are good.. As I said, it was nice to see him in a position to give guidance to a group even more out of touch than he is. It was very wel done. The issues are mainly with Part One. We have this plot where they go to DS9… and we are barely there. We have Dr. Bashir… and only him. None of the other characters. We don't even see O’Brien despite him having transferred to DS9 at this point. Maybe the actors were busy sot they could only pick one but it kinda makes doing a crossover cheap. Bashir doesn’t even get a lot to do, you could write him out and very little would change. On the upside this means that viewers who haven’t watched DS9 won’t be confused nor would DS9 be required viewing, but it also kind of defeats the purpose of bringing DS9 in. It’s essentially just window dressing. Data’s plot, while nice, is completely dropped in Part Two. It feels like they were required to do a two-parter, didn’t have enough of the Worf plot to fill it out, and came up with the Data dream plot and using DS9 to fill it out. The crew also don’t really do anything in either part. As such, aside from getting Worf into the place he needs to be, Part One feels irrelevant. As such, I can’t give it a perfect rating. It was still good, but as a two-parter Part One bogs it down, but still allows for Part Two to happen. Overall, pretty good. 4/5.

#st watchthrough

[beyond-far-horizons]

BFH watches LoK Epi 4/S1

Spoilers obv!

Wow this is an action packed episode!

We get introduced to two major characters, a new romance starts, there’s a date, a gala and two fights! Plus a ton of character development for Korra.

Let’s talk about this sweet girl, I’m really liking her more and more. Talk about a waterbender out of water. She’s in a completely new environment and trying her best, not just at airbending (which she still can’t do) but at socialising and shouldering the huge burden of being the Avatar. What I love about Korra is her enthusiasm, her joy in her powers and her willingness to do her best for people.

Sadly given the introduction of smarmy politician Tarlok and full villain mode!Amon all of those things are under threat. I’m usually able to separate my fiction from RL quite well, even while critiquing for sociological storytelling and problematic tropes etc. I also have a confession to make - I’m a huge heroine x villain/anti hero shipper/enemies to lovers enthusiast and having seen some great Amorra content I was fully onboard with the ship despite knowing his behaviour was dark and unacceptable in the main story (he is a villain after all!). Still having watched this episode, it’s getting a little too close to RL. Seeing a confident, powerful young woman, full of life, not only manipulated by a much more savvy, older male politician and then overpowered and terrorised by a masked man and his gang was really hard to watch in some ways. 

I know, I know, it’s fiction and and all, but seeing her lose her spark and cry childlike in Tenzin’s arms afterwards is heartbreaking. (BTW Tenzin and Korra’s mentor relationship continues to grow and delight me.) I just want a cut scene where she goes Avatar mode, bypassing Aang and Roku and goes full Kyoshi on Amon’s ass, then we’ll see who’s going to be destroyed!

Speaking of Amon, does he practice his villain speeches in front of mirror? Also how long was he and his crew lying in wait in the dark? I always wonder about this trope - Character A waiting for hours in the dark for Character B to turn on the light and be shocked, like Bond to M in Skyfall. It’s a bit ridiculous when you think about it. Don’t get me wrong, I still love Amon and he’s intimidating as hell but yeah not cool, Phantom, I mean Amon, not cool. (”I received your invitation, young Avatar...” “Yeah well you’re late aren’t you?”)

The animation sequence of the ambush was amazing, great use of light, dark and fire effects, not to mention music. Also while I’m not a fan of the Statue of Liberty!Aang and the whole Americanisation of the Avatar world (see this blog by author Jeannette Ng for more), it was really powerful to see Korra psyching herself up for the showdown in Aang’s shadow, both a comfort and a burden to live up to. 

The concept of the Avatar is one I’m fascinated with and have been even since learning about the Dalai Lama and various Eastern spiritual traditions as a child. Rebirth as a spiritual notion is what captured me, but here we are starting to explore it as a character development tool. This was always fascinating in A:TLA with Aang having to deal with the fallout of Roku’s epoch and Roku being a reaction to the strictness of Kyoshi etc. But also because most of us start the series having bonded with the previous characters of A:TLA it actually mostly reminds me of Star Trek Deep Space Nine and the character of Jadzia Dax who is one in a long line of hosts to a benevolent symbiote and retains its previous hosts’ memories including a previous friendship with Commander Sisko (now I’m also thinking about the Tokra from Stargate too.) 

Jadzia Dax in DS9

Korra dealing with the feelings of inadequacy compared to her predecessor and trying to find her own place in the world are feelings we can all relate to esp young women and I continue to love Korra being allowed to have these feelings whilst still being a badass and looking gorgeous at the gala in her traditional dress and having awkward crushes. The fact that no-one brings up ‘bUT you’RE JusT A gIrl AvaTar’ is so refreshing. The lack of sexism and the presence of empowered multi-faceted women throughout the world so far is wonderful (apart from Katara, shakes fist endlessly!)

Talking about looking gorgeous and awkward crushes...I guess I better mention the entry of Asami and the start of the love triangle.

Now frankly I can’t blame Mako, every time I see Asami I feel like I’ve been hit by a moped too. The woman is one of the most gorgeous characters I’ve ever seen and I’ve seen ALOT of anime. Plus she’s got the femme fatale and kooky sweetness with the cool motorbike fashion and I ugh, wow! The romance is too fast and it would make me suspicious if (spoilers) but damn if Asami asked me on a date I would go with her 100%. So Mako got himself a super hot rich girlfriend AND met Henry Ford  her dad who’s gonna pay for them to enter the tournament - good for him... probably.

Sigh, Korra’s jealous and I get it, I would be too if I was her. I think I’d be into this dynamic a lot more if I was younger but also given (spoilers) how we know things are going to go I just want Mako and Asami to declare themselves ‘Unicorn hunters’ right now and ask Korra to join them - Makorrasami FTW. Not usually a fan of that sort of relationship but I’m totally on board this time and it would be a completely balanced mutual love fest (even though Korra likely should be a bit older though before things get too intense) 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Finally I’m sorry but when Korra launched into a rant and challenged Amon to a duel all I could think of was - 

Like imagine if Amon turned up like - 

“You’re a third rate Avatar, Korra, with a fourth rate gaang!” (Kaibaman’s a fanboy of the original series, clearly!)

#legend of korra #lok #korra #amon #asami #mako #tenzin #kaibaman #jadzia dax #BFH watches LoK #flashing gif #tw epilepsy #slight trigger warning for implications of potential assault #tarlok #yugioh #makorrasami

[captainrandomstranger18]

My dearest Captain,

The story of Thaddeoso is much less exciting than one might think. Basically my grandpa told a story of this huge frog that hung around when my mom was young and they called him Thaddeus. Then then my cousins and I found this huge frog by the spring and my sibling suggested we call him Thaddeoso, so we did.

1. Could you maybe stop judging others and let them enjoy things in peace please?

2. All the ones I’ve seen so far (tos, aos, tng, and voyager)

3. That’s a hard one. I like all of them Janeway and Q and Geordi a lot though

4. I don’t know, I actually haven’t thought about it

5. Yep! I like most musicals, but I think my current favorites are Sweeney Todd, Singin in the Rain, and Cats (not the newer movie though)

6. Maybe maple cus we used to make maple syrup back at the first place I lived

7. You know what should be a thing? Space mythology. Like dragons who live in black holes and hoard light and sirens that mimic distress signals to lure spaceships into asteroid fields and vampires that steal the oxygen from your lungs (I have been thinking about this a lot today)

8. It’s currently tied between a black pair with neon kinda flowery/geometric shapes and a white pair with jellyfish

9. I haven’t been in public lately and I tend to tune out most of the other people in school so I don’t really have anything for this one. I hit my creative writing word count goal though! (8,000 words (everyone set their goals at 8,000 except this one kid who set his at 8,001))

I have never had a brookie, but it sounds amazing.

Yours,

L

Dearest L,

To continue the pattern of answering my own questions:

1. I would probably do 1 of 2 things (depending on my mood). Either I would tell everybody to treat all people with respect or kindness, or I would just rick roll everyone on the planet.

2. My favorites are also all the ones I’ve seen so far (I swear it is so hard to pick a favorite Trek! They are all so beautiful and wonderful and unique in their own ways, and its hard to compare them to each other.) These include TOS, TAOS, DS9, and TNG.

3. Data would probably be my #1 favorite, and my second favorite would be everyone else because I can’t choose.

4. I relate to Data’s curiosity and not understanding humans all the time, and I relate to Julian Bashir’s awkwardness. But the character I probably relate to the most is Reginald Barclay. Like every time he comes on screen and so much as breathes I’m like “MOOD. THAT’S ME RIGHT THERE.” I also relate to Riker because I like to put my leg up on random things.

5. I like a lot of musicals. My favorites would probably be Hamilton, The Fiddler on the Roof, and Bye Bye Birdie (I was in that one for my high school’s theater program. I was a background character.) Singin’ in the Rain is also really good, although I haven’t watched it in a while. I do remember my first time watching it, though. I was a little kid and I was at my grandma’s house and she got out an umbrella so we could dance along to it. :D

6. My favorite tree would have to be the Rainbow Eucalyptus: 

I’m sending pictures of the most amazing trees, you’ll be obsessed with all my forest expertise! (Sorry that was a Dear Evan Hansen reference) (I’m not even that big of a fan of the musical, that line just popped into my head right now) (Although Sincerely Me is sincerely a bop in my opinion.) (Dang that was off topic, where was I?) 

AH, yes. TREES!

I just-look at its colors. Asfshdjkds. I kinda want one tbh. Ok, fine, I really want one. The only issue is that they live in tropical climates and I DON’T live in a tropical climate so it probably wouldn’t do too well if I were to plant one here. Oh well. At least the internet exists so I can admire them from afar.

Here’s the wikipedia article on them if you want to learn more: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eucalyptus_deglupta

7. First of all, can I just say that I LOVE THE IDEA OF SPACE MYTHOLOGY. That’s brilliant. And you’re absolutely correct. Why isn’t that a thing? THAT SHOULD BE A THING!!!! (Side question: do you mind if I use your space dragon idea in that Existential Crisis: The Musical that I’m sort of on a hiatus of writing? Like that,,,, is such a cool idea. The musical mostly takes place in outer space btw. Also if I do use it I’ll be sure to credit you! Even though I’m not actually planning on getting the musical published anywhere any time soon. Side-side question: should I credit you as “Mysterious Anonymous Tumblr User L” or something else? Side-side-side question: I actually forgot what I was going to type here but “side-side-side” is fun to say. OK I JUST REMEMBERED. Actually I just forgot again. Goshdarn adhd. OH I REMEMBERED AGAIN. Would you like to hear what my musical is about in a future letter? That is all.)

Dang i just went off on a tangent there (This is what it’s like when my adhd medication has worn off). What was question #7 even supposed to be?

*checks previous letter* Oh, to go on a rant of any sort. I think I just kind of did that on accident. Whoops. (Sorry you had to read my stream-of-consciousness ramblings about whatever the heck that was.)

ANYWAYS, I liked your space dragon idea so much that i drew this picture based on it, here you go:

sorry the camera quality is really bad lol. I tried (and failed) to make the dragon look galaxy-printed if that makes any sense. 

But dude- space mythology is my new favorite thing now.

8. My current favorite pair of socks are a pair I have that are fluffy with unicorns on them.

9. I haven’t been in public lately either lol. But congratulations on your writing goal! That’s a lot of words! :D

Brookies are, in fact, amazing.

Now for some new questions!

1. Since you mentioned previously that you liked Unnus Annus, and since I basically missed out on most of it, what happened in some of your favorite episodes?

2. Do you think reality is a simulation?

3. Do you have any cool random facts about anything? (it can be about LITERALLY anything. I like any and all cool random facts.)

4. Do you know what your hogwarts house is?

5. Do you have a motto of any sort?

6. Am I allowed to guess who you are, or should I wait for you to tell me? (I’m fine waiting, it’s just that I have a few guesses already)

7. Would you like to read my horrible Star Trek crack fanfiction.

8. Semi-Philosophical Question Time: How would you define freedom?

That is all! Thank you for continuing to write/read these letters. I look forward to them every day! To quote another musical, “Now my life gets better every letter that you write me!” (Sorry if that was dumb lol, im bad at this)

Yours Truly,

Captain

[taxicabinmemphis]

#StayProud is today so I guess I will tell people the boring story of how I "came out", and why I didn't come out earlier. Long post, don't feel obligated to read! I just thought it was a good day to share.

~~~

So, for background, my parents are liberal, accepting, not homophobic at all, so they aren't unsafe to be gay around. However, as I started to figure out that 'hey I'm pretty gay for the White Canary', my parents and I had a conversation about being LGBTQ+. I mentioned how I knew many people around me who identified as gay, bisexual, or queer, and I also brought up Brendon Urie being pansexual (he was the only pan I knew of, and I was thinking I was pan). Bringing that up was me kind of putting my right foot out of the closet, testing the waters to see if I might later come out. After I explained what pansexual was, my dad made a remark that wasn't exactly homophobic, but it did just kinda shove me back into the closet. "Yeah, but I think at your age, you're just too young to know."

Right as it was said I was taken aback, hurt, angry, irritated, annoyed. I immediately wanted to jump to the defense of my friends (I didn't name anyone or anything, I don't out people), but I was basically speechless and caught off guard.

Because my dad had talked to me about BOYFRIENDS before, seemingly acknowledging that I could have a crush on a guy (but that I was too young to date, and I was, I was 11). He KNEW that I had the hots for a friend when I was three. THREE. I wasn't too young to love then!

But the thing was, the thing that was confusing me, was that all throughout elementary school, I never had a crush, and everyone around me was like "Julia, you have to have a crush. Not having one is unrealistic! We all know you have the hots for [insert male name here]. He likes you!"

And now my father is saying that I can't know if like a badass woman I saw on TV, that I'm too young?! I was in sixth grade, goddammit! I had friends who were dating. Was there some age you had to reach before you could be gay?

I knew my sexuality. I knew I wasn't too young. I also knew that if it did change, that if I started to prefer something else, I could. And that was okay. But I knew that then and there, a sixth grader who had never been taught about homosexuality, who learned about the LGBT+ community from her bi friend and learned about pansexuality from the internet, that I was pan.

And so I became spiteful. Looking back, too spiteful, but it's too late now. I figured "if you think I'm too young to know, and if I think there is no such thing as too young, you will decide when I am old enough. You will decide when I have reached the age where I am eligible to come out. When you decide you are ready for me to come out, you can ask me. And I will tell you."

And that became my motto. "If you ask, I'll tell." And so it eventually became that everyone at school knew, as I was very open about my sexuality, would throw it in conversation when appropriate, and when people would come out to me, I would come out to them. My friends outside of school knew too, we watched Arrow and Legends of Tomorrow together and I did nothing to hide my crush on Sara Lance. And so it became that my friends knew, some of my teachers probably knew, but my parents didn't.

But then I failed my mental health questionnaire/check-in/whatever.

And my primary care doctor basically said "Get this fucked up teen to therapy AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" She implied that we should looked at therapists the second we got home.

Either way, it took my mom a few months to get me a therapist. We're pretty poor, my parents get busy, and therapy is damn expensive! And eventually, by the time I thought my mom forgot that the doctor demanded that I get help, I got a therapy appointment.

And the first thing that happens, is intake.

So flash-forward, I'm in the therapist's office, my mom's beside me because a parent or guardian had to be there and I am not comfortable with my dad when it comes to discussing mental health. Intake is basically a lot of questions, at least it was for me. Pronouns and other basic stuff that I don't remember.

But the question came.

"Sexuality?"

And I went to say "I don't want to answer that" as my mom was right there and I was used to hiding my sexuality from her. But then the words rang through my head.

If you ask, I'll tell you.

And so, with a slight smirk on my face but nerves coursing through my brain, I said "Pansexual." There it was. There was no going back.

My mom was shocked; her form flinched backwards in surprise. The therapist could see I hadn't told my mom this before. My mom wasn't mad or anything, she just told the therapist "yeah I just didn't know" and I turned to her and said my motto "if you asked, I would've told you".

No, it is not her fault for not asking. I'm not angry at her. She didn't make the comment that I was too young. I just wished she would've realized how socially anxious I am, that I would never have the courage to sit them down and tell them, or even just randomly shout "guess what, I'm pan!"

But I resigned myself to "if they ask, I'll tell, cuz even if they don't just ask me out of the blue, they most definitely will want to when I bring a girl home". It was a combination of spite and anxiety.

My dad on the other hand, I never truly came out to. I realized I could never do the sit down with the family, or bake a pink, yellow, and blue cake with the statement of ‘I'm pansexual’ gracing the top. Because two of the three people I lived with knew (I came out to my grandpa early on, I feel really safe around him so that was easy). My father realizing was basically a random throw-in of "...pansexuality, like me..." and I continued on. I could see the look on his face but it wasn't enough shock to stop me. That, and me desperately trying to give him clues. Because it's so casual and forgettable with him though, I will still make gay statements to make sure he hasn't forgotten. But because of his reaction of "of course" to "I mean I don't blame Julian Bashir for flirting with Jadzia, if I were on DS9 I would have the hots for her too" (my most recent gay statement), I think there is no confusion.

~~~

So yeah! That's my gay story! I don't expect anyone to read it, it's super long, but I really just wanted to share on this prideful day. To those of you who somehow haven't figured it out, I am pansexual! And I am not in the closet anymore.

I will say that I am very lucky to be able to come out as I did, that so many of my LGBT+ siblings don't have that privilege. I am here for you, my messages are always open, and I support you.

#StayProud

#stay proud #stayproud #long post #my coming out story #i love you guys

[claudeng80]

Okay, I was otherwise occupied the last couple of days and could not rub two brain cells together to prompt you: Directors cut of the boxing chapter of the Star Trek AU

Chapter 1 of Lyrias Station, the third segment.

I feel like I should start this off with a special thanks to all the contributors to Memory Alpha. While I have spent many hours of my life watching Star Trek shows and reading books and so on and so forth, I definitely leaned on the wiki to get through this.

I figure this is a small station, generally something of a backwater, and full of scientists - they are going to be constantly up to something. While Zen is Command and generally on the side of Rules, secret martial arts tournaments are fun. And perfect for a date! Not like there’s much else to take a girl to do without holodecks getting involved.

As for who’s winning in the brackets, I’m figuring anyone who frequents away teams is going to get a lot more hand-to-hand practice than any of the squishy desk scientists. Xenoarchaeology? Accustomed to wrestling giant bugs and who knows what. Security? Trained. Command? Redshirts. Botanists? No way. Shirayuki doesn’t have a clue what she’s looking at.

Which makes this an even better date for Zen, because he gets to explain stuff- until he gets too involved in the fight and forgets to narrate.

As for Obi’s fighting styles, his background in this story is more or less growing up on a tramp freighter. He’s been all over the quadrant, spent time with tons of different species, and as a physically-oriented person, he’s studied a lot of martial arts. So they get more and more unlikely as the fight continues. Muay Thai is not an uncommon human choice, but definitely not a good match for a Vulcan martial art that I pictured as evasive and good at redirecting force. (That was me guessing, Memory Alpha didn’t say) So that doesn’t work.

So he moves up a notch. This is set in the late TNG early DS9 era, so relations with the Klingons are pretty decent and humans are starting to learn Mok-Bara. It’s not unheard of, but definitely uncommon.

Cardassian Boxing I made up. The Federation is almost at war with them, so how would a human learn a Cardassian martial art? Even I don’t know! They certainly don’t!

I still find the detail about Kiki having to learn technique for back-slaps funny. I love the idea that she wants to bond with her rough-and-tumble human pals but doesn’t quite have the force calibrated right.

And then one of my favorite buried details in this whole chapter: Br’kar. Yes, Brecker is a Klingon, yes Shirayuki thwarted a scheme of his and they don’t get along.

I replaced the hair bauble with a coin here for a few reasons. First, it made more sense as the kind of trinket that would show up as a reward in an illicit martial arts tournament. I assume that challenge coins are still a thing in the future, and that this particular piece was a souvenir of the founding of the station. My mental picture of Lyrias Station is that it’s actually three facilities welded together - Wistal is the bulk of it, and Laxdo and Yuris were smaller stations moved in and attached at a later date. Obi doesn’t have a use for a piece like that - he doesn’t expect good luck even with the help, and it’s just another place to him, not somewhere he’s attached to. For Shirayuki it’s really the second home she’s known, and she’s very excited about the history.

I know putting Makir (=Makiri) at the founding of the station probably gums up the timeline a bit, but Vulcans are long-lived. I haven’t thought through how to get Izana and Vulcan Haki together in this timeline, but I’m sure it’s epic. Psychohistory snuck in there in the Foundation sense - anything a psychohistorian is pushing for is probably going to be important.

And Zen press-ganging Obi onto his Parrises Squares team is my equivalent of him taking hold of Obi’s reins. The hierarchy doesn’t work quite the same as in canon, but they’re going to be friends.

#bubblesthemonsterartist #commentary

[bisexualryder]

When you get this, please respond with five things that make you happy~! Then, send to the last ten people in your notifications. You never know who might benefit from spreading positivity~! ❤❤❤

oof oof oof, I meant to reply to this earlier but... well.. I suck and watched DS9 and then played Warframe lmao. So I guess...

Star Trek! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I love Star Trek to pieces and my recent resurgence in love (and motivation to start watching episodes again) is due in part to @cloaked-romulan-warbird. So thank you thank you again, hun ❤ 

Talking about OCs with people! I’ve been off and on on the interactive front lately, but I do try. And I appreciate the talks you and I have had, Kai, and also with @bosmerie :3 OH and always always love talking OCs with @sidestepsbutt (even though you break my fucking heart every time, ilu and ur OCs sm).

My friends! There’s folks both on here and on discord that I absolutely cherish and my life really wouldn’t be what it is without any of them. Not gonna tag anyone specifically on this one cause I don’t want my tired ass to accidentally leave someone out or anything like that. But if we chat and/or are mutuals? Not even if we chat a lot, idc, we’re friends and I love you.

Video games, naturally, lmao. Right now a lot of the joy is coming from Warframe (usually with a really good friend of mine on discord) and also enjoying The Arcana. It may sound silly, but it makes me happy to have an opportunity to read and become invested in a story that I can take in bite sized pieces and have a modicum of control and create my own OCs to fit into the world as I read along.

UMM. Gotta be honest, been pulling a lot of these out of my ass. If any of y’all know me at all, you know I’m terrible with this sort of thing. Especially when I have a set number of things I need to come up with lmao. UHHH so uhhmmmm. I think worth mentioning is seeing people on here, in spite of the major drop off in activity, talking passionately about their OCs or favorite characters (in any fandom I’m in tbh). I may not always interact with everyone or even get a chance to read a lot of the stuff, but know that I’m seeing the joy it’s bringing y’all and that is making me happy to see.

#that last one is probably a copout but honestly it's past 1:30 and i'm tired af #i should be sleeping but i realized i wanted to answer this before bed #ANYHOW #there ya go #time for me to go spread the ask around myself now c: #drellvhen

[goodyeartheshippycat]

Tagging Game

Rules: Answer 21 questions about yourself and tag 21 people whom you want to get to know better :)  

Tagged by both @sparkly-things AND @slstarrycity <3

Nickname/Pet name: Don’t really have one. Whatever my partner has decided to refer to me as in a given span of time, I guess. Common fallbacks for that include “clumsy baby giraffe” and “monster”.

Zodiac: Aries/Snake, though I don’t subscribe to astrology of either kind.

Height: Just shy of 6’ tall (182 cm).

Last Movie: Into the Spider-Verse. Highly recommended!

Last Thing Googled: “Shai Utoh shrine treasure” >> clearly a sign I’ve been doing nothing while sick except playing Breath of the Wild. Because I was having a frustrating time reaching the final treasure chest in that shrine and wanted to know what it had in it so I wasn’t needlessly beating my head against my controller over a shitty boomerang or something. Spoiler alert, it had an ancient core in it so I continued to struggle with the challenge of figuring out how to properly launch Link into the air at the correct height to paraglide onto the ledge containing it. But I succeeded in the end! [insert triumphant emoji here]

Favorite Musician: Single musician rather than group? Probably one of the greats from the jazz era. Count Basie or Duke Ellington or Django Reinhardt or Artie Shaw, perhaps.

Song Stuck in Head: Most recently Gaston’s song, but with the lyrics changed to fit Prince Sidon from BOTW (I fell down a YouTube hole of crack, don’t judge me), some of which I couldn’t remember so I just started making up new ones as I hummed it. I’m most proud of “No one thinks like Sidon / No one winks like Sidon / No one lusts after Hylian twinks like Sidon”. (Okay, you can totally judge me and my complete lack of musical talent).

Other Blogs: Nope, I just shove everything onto this one like the heathen I am. Sorry to anyone who follows me for/knows me from a fandom that I don’t post enough about (looking at you lovelies from the DS9 community – sorry y’all, I still love seeing your content, though).

Do I Get Asks: Usually only if I do an Ask Meme. Which I should do again sometime because they’re fun.

Following: 196. Wow, how did that get so large? I should probably go through and thin that out a bit…

Dream Trip: Travelling across Asia. I’ve never been to that part of the world but would love to go some day when I have enough money. I want to see the cultural sights, the natural sights, and eat lots of delicious street food!

Amount of Sleep: I miss being young and not needing it, but these days I do best with 6-9 hours. And then another hour or two lazing around in bed, if possible XD

Lucky Number: I’m super skeptical and don’t believe in the concept of “luck” per se…. but I’ll go with 38 (the number of my favourite Pokemon, and therefore near and dear to my nostalgic heart).

What I am Wearing: A green and blue plaid cotton house dress from the late ‘60s or ‘70s, a rainbow striped sweater, and black fleece-lined tights (because it’s winter, so fashion must also be at least somewhat practical.

Dream Job: Botanic garden curator. Or mad scientist.

Fave Food: All of them? It’s difficult to pick because I love eating. It’s hard to beat freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies, though. For savoury food, maybe dumplings (though that encompasses so many different types it’s almost cheating…  but I love them all!)

Play Any Instruments: Nope, never really had the talent for that.

Languages: English. Un peu (tres petit peu) de Français.

Fave Songs: Going by how frequently I’ve listened to them over the past little while:

Make Me Feel by Janelle Monae – Probably my song of 2018, and a fabulous video to boot.

Wild West by Lissie – First heard while watching the new season of Twin Peaks, but listened to incessantly while driving over the summer. Anyone who rode in my truck probably heard it at least once.

Thin Blue Flame by Josh Ritter – A rediscovered old favourite. So fucking powerful and it builds from such a quiet, unassuming start.

House by Patrick Wolf – Inspired by Liz’s inclusion of a Patrick Wolf song! I’ve been listening to his stuff for over 10 years now (wow, how time flies!) and love everything from his dark, emo-inspired phase to the happy, upbeat, ‘80s-influenced pop numbers. Putting this song in because the music video is just, so aesthetic.

Random Fact: I’m secretly a bit of a hoarder but I’m also fairly organized—as well as good at using available space and tidying up—so it doesn’t really look like I am.

Describe yourself as aesthetic things: Vintage dresses soaking in a handwash basin, the commingling scents of a glass of scotch and a cup of tea sitting on the side table together, the way a book’s deckled edges feel against your fingers, creamy lace paired with worn leather, the flickering of a neon sign with blackened burn out marks in the corners, that indescribable feeling of standing alone in the forest after the rain, an overflowing box of costume jewellery, the dull sheen of light reflecting off snake scales ready to shed, dirt clinging to the smooth metal spokes of a bicycle wheel.

I thought that last question would be harder, honestly, but once I had one or two, the rest just started to flow. Not sure how accurate they are as descriptors, but read into them what you will. I suppose…

Tagging: As per usual, do it if you’d like to, because I enjoy reading them, but I’m not gonna bother tagging anyone specifically.

#meme #about goodyear #my life tbh #i went a bit overboard here #whoops #goodyear rambles #random fact about me #thanks for tagging me #you're both so sweet #i love reading these #it's so much fun to learn about online friends

[jewishdragon]

Jake the Borrower Chapter 3

Visions and Meetings

[DS9 Borrower AU inspired by onetobeamup. Chapter 1: Space is no Place for a Human. Chapter 2: The Invisible Resistance]

[Recap from the end of chapter 2: Jake was seen by Tora Ziyal. And then runs into his dad]

This is the chapter where I realized I’m in too deep and this AU should be called Ben the Borrower but it’s too late

----

"I can't believe you would do something so foolish, Jake. You know better than that. This is the first lesson a Borrower learns. Or have you forgotten?" Ben said, raising his voice as much as he dared. 

Jake was avoiding his father's eyes.

"No sir, I haven't."

"Look at me when you're talking, and tell me what the rule is," instructed Ben.

It took a lot to look back at his dad's face, so full of disappointment.

"You must not be seen," supplied Jake. "I didn't mean to break the rule."

"That's the problem, Jake - I think you did. And in doing so you not only endangered yourself but all of us, in this house, on this planet! By being seen, you risk all humans to exposure. More importantly, it risks my losing you, and I... I can't bearto think I could have so easily." Ben's voice was starting to waver. He had been so scared. "Since you got away, we just have to be extra careful, and she will just think it was only a dream."

"I guess you won't let me borrow for a while now," said Jake.

"If I could afford to issue that punishment, I would. But we are stocking up tonight and morning is only a few hours away. Jadzia and I are making another kitchen borrow. I need you and Nog to do a supply run from the other guest room. There are pieces of broken toys and computers, you know the like, that I want Miles to have. He's going to meet you there; No one is in those rooms. Tomorrow we can see what's going on with the garden and maybe gather some herbs."

At the mention of his name, Nog was at Jake’s side. Ben gave them both a few extra tools used to borrowing electronics and led them all the way to the other room. He left them with Miles, but not before giving Jake one last warning.

"You aren't to go near the girl again. Is that understood?" growled Ben

"Yeah, dad."

"Good! Now good borrowing!”

"Good borrowing to you too, Mr. Sisko," said Nog, waving goodbye.

Miles started to lead them in the opposite direction. Then Nog turned to Jake, looking up at his friend who looked guilty even though accused of nothing. "You're going to try and see her again, aren't you?" Nog asked, whispering, since Miles might have been instructed to monitor them more closely than usual.

"I don't think you want me to answer that," said Jake.

"Why not?" asked Nog

"Plausible deniability."

"That's the opposite of reassuring," said Nog.

"Hey, come help me with this!" called Miles from across the room and under the bed.

That area was like a junkyard. There were years worth of random discarded items accumulated there, with treasures hidden in it. It seemed to be a place where anything broken was just shoved. But if the room was to be cleaned, they had to get to what they could now. It had been scoured many times by the Borrowers but knowing this might be the last time, they were finding things they'd missed before.

The engineer was trying to pull something shiny from a tangle of other shiny things. A Bajoran earpiece! Though it looked a bit bulky.

"Jewelry? Mr. O'Brian, is this really the time to be looking for something nice for your wife?" Jake said, not hesitating to assist Miles in liberating the object.

"You sound like your father, Jake. This piece is a communicator! The delicate instrumentation that is needed to make it look like jewelry is some of the highest quality," said Miles. "For being a few years old..." With a trusty wrench, Miles was able to open up and take apart the electronics, stuffing wires and crystals into his bag.

Jake moved on, heading to another pile of tangled junk. He couldn't remember if he'd ever searched this one before. Everything in the pile was technically useful, but most wasn't needed right now. Pieces of metal, plastic, paper, odd items that could be raw materials. This place had served as a sort of vault for everything, but they couldn't move most of it. There was just so much.

Jackpot! Jake found an old remote to something, maybe a toy? Who knew, but it had small batteries. He was sure that Kasidy could use more, or someone would find a use. He pulled them out of the device, careful not to turn it on, and pocketed the metallo-crystals. They were kind of pretty.

Nog hadn't made any sort of noise, grumble of boredom or otherwise, in a little while, which made Jake suspicious. Abandoning his pile Jake went searching for his friend and discovered him quickly, by a ancient data pad. Nog had hooked it up to his own, smaller pad, and was clearly browsing through some items. He jumped when he noticed Jake.

"Dude, it's just me!"

"Yes, of course! I knew that!" said Nog.

"Whatcha looking at?" said the voice of Miles, who had followed Jake. He looked at both boys suspiciously.

"Nothing! I mean! Well I found this old data pad and since the tech is too bulky I thought maybe the information it contained might be valuable!" said Nog

"And?" asked Miles. Nog's ears went red.

"There was a large file of, um, pictures of Bajoran women, and not much else."

Miles pinched his brows. God damn teenagers. He dragged Nog away from the pad and assigned him a new pile to work on, with Jake's help. Hopefully Jake would keep them on track.

The sun had just begun to rise when the door to the room opened and several Cardassians stormed in. The humans snatched up what they could and ran back to the safety of the wall space. They scrambled to a view port behind a wall fixture. from there they could watch what was going on.

The Cardassians spread out, there were four of them. They didn't look happy.

"All of this needs to go!" said a Cardassian with greenish skin, clearly the boss of the other three. He waved at the piles of junk and the bed.

Everything was cleared out, and a long forgotten floor was revealed. Then an object was brought in on a very ornate pedestal. It looked like a plain black box. The Cardassian with greenish skin pressed his fingers to the edge of the box in a sequence and it opened. A second object, covered in a cloth, was brought in and placed into the box.

"Place a guard by the door. Two, actually. No one is to enter the room without my authorization!" the Cardassian in charge ordered.

With that, the room was empty of both people and things, except for the box. Miles took both boys by their elbows and dragged them away. It was nearly morning, they needed sleep. After escorting Nog, then Jake, back to their homes, Miles returned to the garden shed where he lived with Keiko and their daughter.

Benjamin made sure Jake had fallen asleep before allowing himself to do the same.

---

<i>Sisko.

SISKO sisko Sisko</i>

"Mr Sisko?"

Everything was fuzzy. The voices, the figures they came from. He couldn’t remember what he was doing or where he was. The voices were familiar, and they had faces attached, which he could almost make out. Friends? Family?

“He can’t hear us, he is too far,” said a voice. Female, maybe?

“I’m right here! I can hear you!” said Ben, grasping at the figures in the haze.

The faces turned away.

“Ben!”

Hands on his shoulders, clear voice of Jadzia, and he was back in the kitchen, on the table. He had been cutting berries off of a stem in strategic places to make sure the few missing weren’t noticeable. But the knife wasn’t in his hand anymore. It was at his feet.

“Jadzia, did you see that?” Ben already knew the answer.

“No, and I think we should go to Julian. You just stood there for a good minute, staring at the berries,” said Jadzia, picking up the knife and not returning it to Ben.

“But the borrowing, we-” He wobbled where he stood.

“You are in no shape to borrow, or even make it to Julian’s. I’m taking you home to bed. You  need rest Ben.”

He didn’t make another objection, but by the time he got back to his room, he was feeling much better. And Miles was waiting for him.

“What is it? Is something wrong?” Ben looked at Nog and Jake, who were on the couch.

“I’m not sure, but I need to tell you something.” Miles also looked to the two boys. “After these two get to bed.”

“Nog, go back to your place,” Ben ordered, and Nog ran out, Ben locked eyes with Jake.

“I’m still angry at your recklessness, but I’m also grateful you’re alive.” He sat next to his son. “We’ll talk more in the afternoon,” he finished, and he held out his arms. Jake considered for a second before embracing his dad and heading off to bed.

“Now Miles, what is it you wanted to tell me? Did Jake do something?”

“Oh no, sir. He behaved himself.” Miles told Ben about the mysterious object.

“Sounds like none of our business,” said Ben.

“But Sir, you need to see this for yourself.”  said Miles, not really knowing why.

“You said it’s guarded? I don’t think that will be possible” said Ben

“Can’t argue with that, Sir. Good morning, sleep well”

“You too Miles.”

—

He must have gone to bed soon after, he was sure of it. So why was he awake?

Benjamin blinked. He was looking at Miles, or at least, he thought he was. But this man was too young. He also wore the grey and red-brown uniform of the Invisible Resistance.

Looking around, Sisko saw other humans, most of them running up the narrow corridor that stretched away in three directions and also up, all in resistance gear. He was not in the estate, but aboard a Cardassian prison transport. He didn't know how he knew that, as the insides of ship walls all looked the same, but he knew. He also knew that several Bajoran resistance leaders had been captured and were aboard the transport. He knew this place.

"Benjamin, we've re-routed the plasma flow and shut off of the shunts. She'll blow any minute. It's now or never to make our exit."

No, it couldn't be, that voice. Benjamin turned around to come face to face with.

"Jennifer?"

His mind had frozen. She looked at him odd. No, it was odd that she was looking at him at all. With dark eyes pulling him in like a black hole does light, and a face that would charm a Vulcan.

"Yes Ben? Are you alright? You're looking at me funny," she said.

"I- I just,"

"Come on you two. We gotta get a move on, we have to climb over to the other side before-"

BOOM

That was the sound, and shock wave, of the building pressure of plasma blasting the walls of the brig.

"It's too late to climb across. We’ve got to run for it!" shouted O'Brien, as he and the other humans scrambled to get through a small hole that led into the corridor, heading for a compartment in the was on the other side. Alarms were blaring, the lights were flashing, and security could be heard running down the hall. They did not have much time. They must not be seen.

Shots from phasers passed overhead, but Ben was not concerned with who was firing. Then another explosion, closer, much closer. Debris started to hit the ground, and now Sisko saw: the rebels had overpowered their guards and gotten their weapons, (as per the rebel's rescue plans) and the Cardassian security was peeking around the corner on one end of the hall, rebels at the other. The humans had not been seen.

They were almost all in the opposite wall! That provided a direct route to the shuttle bay where they could use the transporters. Once back on the rebel's ship, they would finally be safe.

"Benjamin!"

NO! He knew what was happening. It had happened before, and now he remembered what this was.  Even though he knew what he would see, he turned around. Jennifer on the ground, struck by a piece of flying metal. She could not run. She was struggling to get up to walk. She had fallen behind, and now the Cardassians were running down the hall.

"JENNIFER!"

He instinctively stopped to run to her. More than one person took hold of his arms to drag him away, into the wall. He was screaming, a hand went over his mouth and he bit it. He tasted blood, but the hand stayed. Through tears He still caught a glimpse of the stomping Cardassian feet, going so fast and so dense, there was no hope that Jennifer would survive.

It was no consolation that she hadn't been seen. If she had, maybe they would have stopped, giving him enough time to- no. If he had, he would have been captured, and probably by Cardassians who would experiments on and torture him. Sometimes he wished the Bajorans knew about them, but then the Invisible Resistance wouldn't be so invisible. It was as if the fact that neither the Cardassians nor the Bajorans knew about humans was crucial to freeing Bajor. Ridiculous, of course.

Weird... It was suddenly very bright all around him? And where was everyone?

"Sisko?" a near monotone voice asked.

He was no longer in the ship's walls. No, this was much worse.

Looking down a wide ridged nose at him with large shining brown eyes, was a Bajoran, dressed in purple religious regalia, and he was standing in their hands.

He fell to his knees, unsteady on the flesh of the hands.

NO!

He was lifted up to its face, he could feel its warm breath as it said again. “Sisko”

He had been caught? Found? How? He looked around. More Bajorans! Surrounding him, all staring at him. Not with surprise, or anger, or curiosity. In fact no emotion at all.

“He is still too far gone,” said one.

“Who, who are you? What is happening? Where am I?”

The expressions and voices remained neutral.

“He can hear us.” Ben couldn’t tell which one said that.

“He is leaving us. We must give him directions,”

This time, he found himself in the hands of the one who spoke, not the hands he was in before. And then again, new hands, new speaker.

“You are wrong. Be concerned,” it said.

New hands, new speaker.

“The shadows are not your home!”

“What do you mean? What is my home?” He knew he should feel fear, but his question still came out.

New hands, new speaker

“Sisko of Bajor. You are wrong. Be concerned”

New hands, new speaker. The crowd closed in.

“You are wrong. Be concerned”

New hands, new speaker. The hands now closed around him.

“Be concerned”

--

He woke up. The darkness of the room took him by surprise, It has been so very bright a second ago, or at least, his dreams had been. But they felt so real, and he remembered everything.

Cold sweat dropped off him now that he was sitting up, but his heart would not calm down. The image, no, the sensation of being held in the Bajoran hands were still with him, conflicting with the current sensory input.

"Everything alright?" A body stirred next to him. Kasidy rolled over to look up at her husband, whose eyes were wide and shifting. Something was not alright.

"Just... just a bad dream," said Ben.

His wife moved closer to him, bringing with her warmth. She propped herself up on an elbow. "Must've been some dream, do you want to talk about it?"

"I- I can't remember it now,"

"You're a terrible liar, Ben. I asked a yes or no question. You could have just said-"

"It was my wife. Jennifer, I mean."

"Oh- oh Ben. I won't be mad if you've dreamt about her. You know that."

"I dreamt about her death."

"I can't even imagine..." Kasidy sat up, about to say more, then thought better of it. There wasn't much she could do to comfort him besides being there. As Sisko's current wife, she was a constant reminder of what he'd lost, regardless of how much he had gained. Trying to hold him like a lover wouldn't do any good, Ben needed a friend.

Jake fit the bill better than she did, but she wasn't sure Ben could manage getting dressed to wake his son. So she sat up all the way, sitting next to him in the cool room, and took his hand. The first tears hit the sheets with a soft *thup*.

---

Past noon was when Jake woke up again, but it was Kasidy tapping him on the shoulder, not his father

"Five more minutes."

"Sorry Jake, but you should get up now. You're harvesting today, in case you had forgotten. The Bajorans still have not given signs that they will use the garden but we can't be sure they won't so get your gloves and boots!"

Jake groaned.

"Also, your dad had a rough night, and-"

"I know, it's my fault. I... I feel terrible," said Jake.

"I don't think it's anyone's fault," said Kasidy concernedly, getting Jake's clothes out of his dresser and dropping them in his lap. "But it certainly ain't yours. Still, behaving a little might help his mood."

Jake was about to ask what was going on, since it most certainly was his fault! Then a smell wafted into his room, something sweet and something fried.

"Stress cooking?"

"Yeah. Hope you're hungry because I gotta jet. It’s late as it is." Kasidy left his room and Jake was able to get dressed.

Dinner for breakfast. The Standard Sisko stress response was to cook away the bad feelings, and while Ben could make the most amazing lunches and dinners, he couldn't make a breakfast item to save his life.  The table was covered in steaming entrees.

"Dad, this stuff will go bad. I can't eat it all!"

"Huh? Oh, I guess not. We could take this to the O'Brians, but we can't carry it all on our own." He was trying to sound energetic but Jake could tell his father had not slept much.

"I'll see if Nog or Jadzia can help. Or Alex. No, wait, he's still at Bashir's..." said Jake.

"That's where we are headed. It'll be like a picnic."

Fake excitement didn’t make sense as a response to Jake’s recklessness. He had expected another reprimand. What had happened last night that Jake didn’t know about? There were no clues as to what it could’ve been, and Jake felt to guilty to ask. Instead he walked over to the comm pad on the wall to see if Nog was still home.

—

The Siskos and Ferengis arrived in the garden with plates of food.

There was something to be said for the natural security of the overgrown bramble that grew alongside the garden shed where the O’Brians made their home. Ok, so they didn't live in the bramble, they lived under the shed, not far from gas and power lines. The bramble hid the main entrance but also provided a small area to gather.

"Wasting food, and when we might not get to borrow again for who knows how long?" said Quark as Nog, Jake, Rom, and Ben put the food down on a table made from a broken touch pad screen and corks.

"We have plenty of food, Quark. But if you think it's a waste, I won't waste it on your stomach," said Ben, serving everyone but Quark.

"Wait, I didn't mean it that way! I just meant- oh, never mind." He served himself food, looking at Ben as he did for a hint of aggression. But everyone's attention had turned to the latest arrivals.

A tall, strong young man with dark skin that sharply contrasted his long curly strawberry blonde hair done up in a tight bun, was hobbling on crutches. He had arrived with a skinnier, but just as tall brown skinned man. Alexander Dax and Julian Bashir.

“How’s the foot doing, Alex!?” Nog shouted.

“Better every day!” Alex smiled, and his eyes fell on the banquet.

“That wouldn’t be a lie if you followed my instructions,” said Julian, sitting down and taking a plate of food. He didn’t eat as he continued to talk. “He would have been fit to go home two days ago, but he’s impatient and overdid it on the physical therapy. This is marvelous Ben, what’s the occasion?” Julian finally had taken a bite of the food.

“Just felt like cooking,” said Ben.

Julian understood, and he didn't press the issue.

“Will Worf be joining us?” asked Alex, taking a seat across from Jake and Nog.

“He’s busy, but Jadzia should be here soon,”

As soon as he knew his father wasn’t going to be able to tell him off for aggravating his injury, Alex became focused on his friends.

“So, tell me about the borrowing!”

Nog rolled his eyes. “Alex you’re normally with us. You know how it goes.”

Alex looked disappointed. “Aw, nothing exciting then?”

“Nothing,” said Jake, sighing and looking at his food.

Nog couldn’t contain it anymore. “Just kidding. Last night was crazy! First off...” He ran over to his borrowing pack and pulled out a piece of chocolate confectionary. Alex’s eyes grew wide. “We got sweets” and Nog placed the head sized piece on the table. The three were about to dig into it when Julian intervened.

“Finish your real food first, boys. Especially you, Alex. Your body needs proper nutrition to heal.”

“Yes Doctor,” the three said in unison.

“Hey Doc! Relieve the boys of some of their prize. We adults also have sweet-tooths!” Quark shouted.

“You boys don’t mind?” Julian asked.

“Help yourself,” said Jake. He was eager to get back to recounting the night’s adventure, so he helped load up a plate with chocolate for Julian to take back to the adult side end of the table.

The O’Brians arrived as Julian left them, which finally took the adults attention off of the teenagers, and onto the toddler in Keiko’s arms.

“Second?” asked Alex.

It took a moment for Jake to remember what they were talking about. Nog beat him to it.

“Second, you know that guest room on the second floor? The one right there?” Nog pointed up at the window that was right across from the bramble that hid them from view.

“Well, it's being used, and last night, Jake-“ Jake kicked Nog. He hoped Alex didn’t notice. Nog paused mid sentence but pretended to choke on some food and took a drink of water before continuing.

“Jake and I, we were going to borrow from that room, but there’s a girl in there.”

“Oh! Is this why the meeting was held? Julian didn’t tell me anything! He never does!” said Alex

“Yeah, she arrived in a car with the crest of the House of Dukat on it! He’s some high ranked Cardassian.”

Alex started to look bored as Nog recounted the meeting in detail. He no longer resented Dr. Bashir for not telling him.

“Anyways!” said Jake, “We had one more incident last night. In the supply room.”

“It was finally cleared out!” said Nog, getting the hint.

“You’re kidding!” said Alex.

“Not at all! It was cleared out and it now holds... well, we don’t know what but it’s guarded! With Cardassians! With big guns!” said Nog, rather ineloquently. They spent the rest of the meal theorizing as to what could be in the mysterious box.

Even engaged in conversation with Miles and Julian, Ben couldn’t help but hear the kids mention the box and the object. And after, that is was hard to think of anything else.

Perhaps the arrival of 5 Dax members could take his mind off it. With effort, he pushed it to the back of his mind, and was momentarily satisfied.

“Ah! Julian! Just the man I wanted Ben to see,” said Jadzia, announcing her arrival and immediately setting upon the food. The other four Daxes made longer greetings.

“Jadzia, I am feeling much better this morning, there is no need too-”

“Ben went catatonic during an outing,” said Jadzia after swallowing a rather large mouthful of food.

“Did he now?” said Julian, with an air of confusion and interest.

Everyone went silent, everyone was staring. Jake most of all.

His dad hadn’t said a word about this to him. Was this the reason his dad had been stress cooking? A second ago Jake would have loved any reason for him to no longer be his dad’s source of stress, but now he wasn’t so sure. Catatonic? Was his dad ill?

“Perhaps, Doctor, this is something to be discussed later. In private,” said Ben, calmly but forcefully, and taking a sip of coffee.

“Yes, of course,” replied Julian.

The rest of the meal was eaten in an atmosphere of tension, but they honored Ben’s request for privacy. Jake’s hands became clammy with worry. But eventually, everyone was full and relatively happy, and soon, jobs were being assigned.

Ben, Jadzia, and Miles would go check any rooms they still had access too. Daytime it may be, but populated the estate is not, even with guests. Any room not being cleaned out was not in use. Julian soon ran after them.

Jake and Nog would collect herbs and other plant material that were hard to reach for the expecting Keiko. Supplies that were found deep in bushes, on top of a tall stem of a flowering plant, or up a wall of ivy, for example. Alex was to rest. He could watch his friends, but he was not allowed to use his leg. This meant sitting on a spool and napping, because watching other people gather random shit from a garden isn’t the most exciting pastime.

“Why didn’t you want me to mention the girl to Alex?” Nog cried up to Jake who was a few inches above him, after making sure Alex was asleep.

They were gathering baby leaves that were just sprouting from the top of a overgrown bush. The leaves actually belonged to a vine that had snaked its way through the bush to reach sunlight, only to have its leaves plucked by two humans. Keiko had instructed them to leave some leaves so that the plant would survive.

“It wasn’t Alex I didn’t want hearing about last night. It was everyone else,” said Jake. “You can tell him now if you like.”

Nog glanced down at Alex, who was keeping cool under the shade of a large leaf, while his friends roasted in the sun. He was also still sleeping, his leg elevated slightly on a cushion. “I won’t disturb him. he needs to rest to recover,” said Nog, adjusting his bandana. Today’s was yellow.

Jake looked up at the sky, wiping the sweat from his brow. And as he glanced down, his eyes passed by the house and fell upon a window. In the window was a figure - the girl. She was looking out over the garden, and for a moment Jake flinched, before realizing that he couldn’t be seen from this distance. A small part of him wished he could. That part of him was forming a devious plan. And that part of him dropped his knife.

“What the hell, Jake? That nearly hit me!” cried Nog.

“Sorry about that! Do you think you could get it back for me? You’re closer to the ground!” asked Jake, giving Nog a pleading smile. Nog huffed, grumbling a “fine” and proceeded downward.

Once Nog was out of site, Jake scrambled over the bush towards the house. The edge of the thick bush was about half a foot from the vines the snakes up the gutter drain. Half a foot was about Jake’s height, and he could normally jump that distance, but a bush wasn’t the best jumping-off material.

Determination won over common sense and he leaped, hugging the first piece of vine that he could. The impact jarred him but he didn’t have time to waste and started climbing. The window was only, on the second floor… Nog was sure to discover his absence at any moment. Would he now personally try to stop him? Or go fetch his father…

—-

Ben was pacing the floor as Jadzia and Miles watched. He had been at this for five minutes. Julian had pronounced him in full health, and couldn’t find anything wrong. That didn’t mean nothing was. Jadzia and Miles still worried.

“I’ve changed my mind,” said Ben, looking up at Miles and then to Jadzia. “I must go investigate this object. And as soon as possible. Now in fact.”

“Now!?” said Jadzia and Miles in unison.

“Ben, the room is guarded! It’s broad daylight!” objected Jadzia.

“Sir, if I may speak candidly...” Miles didn’t wait for permission. “This is a bad fucking idea. Last night, you said it was none of our concern.”

That made Ben falter momentarily. He should berate Miles for that. He should also listen to hi friends. They were right. But he was more right. He needed, more than anything in the world, to see the object.

“I was wrong. Based on new information, I believe it is of great concern,” said Ben.

“What new information could you possibly have gotten since you fell last night?” asked Miles.

Ben walked over to the wall; there was a small hole in it where he could look out into the hallway. He watched a Bajoran butler walk by before replying. What could he say? His new information was his gut. At least, he thought it was. His drama said it was important, but with Jadzia already fearing for his sanity, he wasn’t about to mention his dream. He didn’t want to think about the dream, how real the hands felt around him, so large and imposing, hands that could crush him instantly. How had his dreams conjured such realistic hands? He had never been caught.

“I can’t reveal my sources,” lied Ben. “But if I wait, it might be too late. I don’t know how long the object will be there. I’m going.”

“We’re going,” said Jadzia, picking up her gear.

“You don’t need to take this risk, Jadzia,” said Ben.

“I’m not letting you go alone. And even if you did, the risk is never just to yourself, It’s always to all of us, so I’m going,” said Jadzia, placing a hand on Ben’s shoulder. It was tense. “And so is Miles.”

They both stared at Miles, who hadn’t made a move. Then he picked up a climbing hook, put on his gear harness, and pulled his goggles over his eyes. “Of course I’m coming.”

Ben’s shoulders relaxed. Slightly.  “First, we need to see how the room is guarded.”

---

It took a little longer than Nog expected to retrieve the knife. It had landed on its hilt and bounced a ways away. By the time he was climbing back up, Jake was nowhere to be found. Jake hadn’t climbed back down, so he must be above. Nog continued to climb, and his head popped out of the dense leaves, and he looked around.

There were several tall stems shooting out of the bush with flowers and young leaves, but Jake was not perched at any of them. Where could he have gone? He had to get a better vantage point. He chose a flower and started climbing.

Eventually he was high up enough to scan the area. He found Jake, and he nearly lost his grip. He didn’t, instead he drew out a concave mirror.

---

Jake had to swing to get up on the slanted ledge that extended below the window, and once up there he sat down. While he was catching his breath, he looked out over the garden. It was stunning from this high up. Overgrown? Yes. Full of amazing and colorful plants? Also yes. Did a light suddenly shine in his eye? Yes.

The blindness was only for a moment as the light flashed in his face and he looked for the source, which didn’t take long. As he suspected, Nog had returned and found he was, and was furiously signaling to him.

Jake took it as a signal to get moving.

Nog made a split second decision. He couldn’t catch up to Jake. He had to get help.

---

Three pairs of eyes peered through a very small crack in the ceiling, down at the closed door. There was one guard standing right in front of it. They had a rifle, n. Not that a phaser was a threat to a human, being such a small target. But they were alert.

“Ok., Now the room itself,” Ben whispered, as they traveled through the ceiling. As they neared the area over the room, muffled voices reached their ears. This ceiling had no faults; they had to go to the ground. There was a broken wall socket that they could peek out of. Once lower down, the voices became audible.

“And the Bajorans will trade for this? It’s a lump of rock!” someone spat. The voice was Cardassian.

“It isn’t a lump of rock. A common mistake. It’s more energy than matter, and it is sacred to them. They would give almost anything to have it back,” said another voice, also Cardassian.

“They are demanding reparations. This isn’t the time to be demanding things from them,” insisted the first voice.

Ben and company reached the wall socket and looked out. Their vantage point was from the wall on the left of the table. Two Cardassian men were arguing in front of the table. They were dressed in fine clothing of the latest fashion, faces painted and wearing a few pieces of jewelry, all tasteful. A third Cardassian, a guard, was in front of the door, positioned exactly as the other guard.

“Reparations! What a load of crap. The damage they did to all our infrastructure is worth more than what they could hope to take from us now. We are at a ceasefire at best. A long one, yes, but still a ceasefire. They are desperate; they will want this... this Orb, or whatever. I was assured this.”

“By whom?”

“My dear, I cannot compromise with them, but it was a Vedek,” the Cardassian chuckled, “Their religion is almost as important to them as their autonomy, and for some, for many, it is more important.”

“If you are right, then you may have my support. Now, the luncheon is about to start.”

The guard knocked on the door, which was opened by the one outside. All three Cardassians exited. Before the guard shut the door, he placed a hand on a terminal, which had not been there last night. It flashed a confirmation that the room was secure.

“Miles?” asked Sisko.

“I dunno about politics, sir, not since the revolution ended. Been focused on my family you know,” said Miles.

“No, Chief,” said Ben, using Miles’ resistance codename which had become a friendly nickname. “This room has security. Are the special features of your goggles still operational?”

“Yes sir,” said Miles, blushing, but also proud that his cobbled together tech held up so well. He flipped through different modes. After a minute, he smiled. “Sensors on the windows, the door. Motion detectors at 2 decimeters above the ground, making a 2 square decimeter grid. We will have to crawl, but we won’t be detected. OH!” he cried out as his vision went white. “That might be a problem. A life signs detector. It might register us as rodentia and not trigger an alarm, but we can’t tell until it happens.”

“Those detectors never saw us during the resistance. Lead the way, Chief,” said Ben.

Pushing against the wall socket made enough of a gap for the three humans to squeeze through and onto the floor. Miles got them to the table and made sure to have each of them stand up inside a square, and to be careful not to move too much in any horizontal.

None of them could possibly throw a hook that high. But Miles, ever resourceful, had a hook launcher.

“It makes a bit of noise. Are you sure?” he asked, taking it out.

Ben took it. “Point and click?”

“Yes sir,” said Miles.

Ben angled it slightly. A small POP, and it shot up, arcing a bit before hitting the table and snagging the tablecloth. He freed the end of the rope from the launcher and motioned for Jadzia. She carefully entered his square.

“Hold the rope steady,” he instructed. “Don’t let it swing out. When I’m above the sensor grid, cut it.” He began to climb. Once it was cut, the going wasn’t as smooth. He was swinging, but the hook held. He made it onto the table. A black hexagonal cylinder of a box stood before him like a mighty obelisk. He must see what was inside. He ran to the front. It was closed, but not locked. It had a clasp.

“Chief?” said Jadzia, looking worried. “We can’t tell if the box has security, can we?”

“Shit.” said Miles, “We can’t, and even if we could, how would we tell him?”

They could only stand and look up at the table, with no clue as to the goings on top.

---

Jake had reached the window. It was open, but had a mesh screen to keep out bugs. He stayed by the corner as he glanced in. The girl, Ziyal, wasn’t in the bed; instead she was at the small table, reading a book. She was in a nice, but simple dress in the Cardassian style. And she wasn’t alone. Beside her, a grumpy looking Bajoran woman, with short red-brown hair and in a plain uniform. Her legs and arms were crossed. Jake watched as the girl tried to make small talk, but soon gave up.

After a few minutes, the woman got up. Someone was at the door - another Bajoran woman, this one dressed in a maid’s attire. She brought in a tray of food and drink, enough for one person, and set it down on the table.

“I take it I am not to join the lunch?” asked Ziyal, setting her book in her lap. It was hard to tell, but she sounded a bit disappointed.

“No ma’am,” said the uniformed woman, who remained standing, her arms still crossed. “But your father has requested that I be in attendance.”

“I promise not to cause any trouble,” said Ziyal, pouring herself some tea, accepting her lonely lunch.

“You do that just by existing, ma’am,” said the Bajoran, who stiffened at her own harsh words, but she glanced around.

Jake became aware that he was no longer in the corner, but leaning against the mesh, and jumped back to concealment. The Bajoran hadn’t seen him and continued. “And if you do, it will be my neck on the line.” She leaned in close to Ziyal. “You would do best to remember that.”

“It’s nice, not having the room bugged,” said Ziyal. “I wonder if they forgot, or didn’t bother.”

Without another word, the Bajoran left, her tail held stiff to keep it from swishing with frustration. As she exited, Jake moved in front of the window again, not as far as he had let himself before, still in the corner. Ziyal was reading her book again.

---

Ben only reached for the clasp when it unclasped itself and the box swung open.

The incomprehensible was inside, until it shifted, and shifted again, until it took a form that human eyes could handle. It did look a bit like a rock, with its jagged hourglass shape, but it was suspended in the box, and slowly revolving as edges constantly shifted, giving off an intense light.

---

Nog had figured out where Ben was, and had thrown caution to the wind. He was behind the wall socket, and he lifted it up, jumping out and running to Jadzia and Miles as he shouted “Mr. Sisko!”

Jadzia and Miles spun around in terror, “Nog, no!” shouted Jadzia. It was too late. Even so short, Nog had passed through a sensor as he leapt, and the alarm was beeping.

---

The alarm was beeping, the door was opening, but Ben didn’t notice, because for him, time had stopped.

From behind the box walked humans. All of them resistance members that had died. Jennifer led the pack, and took his hands. Instantly, she was gone and he found himself underground, a cavern lit with fairy lights. A resistance compound. No danger, this was an abandoned human colony, now a base. He was eating rations alone in a mess hall. But he was not alone for long.

“Mind if I join you?” Jennifer asked. Ben couldn’t answer. But she sat down. “I’ve seen you here, at this table before. You usually eat with friends, where are they?”

“Jennifer,” Ben finally said.

“That’s my name. How do you know it?” She began eating her rations.

“I- this- this isn’t possible,” said Ben. This was the day he first met Jennifer. She had given him company, which he sorely needed, as his comrades were off on missions. She had taken his mind off worrying about his friends for a few moments. But those few moments turned into daily, then for every meal, even when his friends (most of them, at least) returned.

“You got closer, but there is danger,” she said. Her food was gone. His was too.

“What are you talking about?”

“You must get closer,” she said.

Then she was gone. In her place was Jake; they were sitting on the roof of the mansion. Jake was looking up at the sky.

“Do you ever wonder what’s out there?” Jake asked.

It was a cool night, not unusual, but he remembered this moment. It was from a few years ago.

“You know what is out there,” Ben recited the words, which he had said before. “The Cardassians are out there.”

“But what about beyond them? Surely there is more,” said Jake. “There is more, closer than we even know.”

Ben took a chance that this was not Jake. “How do we do that?” he asked.

Jake looked at him, and then back up. Just like on that night, a ship streaked across the sky.

“What is out there?” asked Ben. “What will I find?”

“You. We. Us,” said Jake.

Ben stood up. He wanted to shake the thing that was not Jake, but he couldn’t, because he was also so clearly Jake.

“How do I find you?”

Jake looked out over the roof. Something was moving across it.

--

Ben was back standing before the object. The light was less intense now, the room around him was a dulled and fuzzy. That something from the roof was there too.

A large black snake was slithering from behind the box, and it reared up, hissing, mouth wide open, the inside of the mouth was as indiscernible as the object had first been. Ben was helpless to move as it lunged at him, engulfing him in darkness. He was suspended in a black void for a second before once again finding himself in the hands of a Bajoran dressed in religious regalia. It was holding him over the table. The box was open, empty. In his own hands was the object, small enough for him to hold. It hurt, the edges were sharp. His hand had cuts, but they weren’t bleeding.

“Danger, we cannot allow this,” said the Bajoran. It walked away from the table, and Ben looked down. He saw, frozen in time, Jadzia and Miles, gesturing at something across the room. It was Nog, who was running towards them.

The Bajoran walked over to Nog and placed Ben next to him. The walk had no gate, there was no feeling of movement at all, even as it lowered him down.

And time started again. He only had a moment to act, the door was opening.

“RUN!” he bellowed, praying he would not be heard above the alarm.

Nog stumbled, as far as he knew, Ben had teleported to him, and was now pulling him into the wall. Jadzia and Miles were running towards them.

The guards burst into the room, but their eyes didn’t look down. They were puzzled momentary by the lack of an intruder. Then they noticed, the box was open. The Orb was gone.

The humans were out of the room as they heard the guards shout with anger and despair. Ben slipped the object into his bag. The small cuts on his hands were now dripping with blood. They stung, but he couldn’t do anything about that right now. They couldn’t stay here, the guards would be back to search the room.  So they swiftly moved to a wall space a few rooms down. Here there was silence, and it was cool.

Miles rounded on Nog, about to give him a piece of his mind, but Ben beat him to it. Or so he thought. “Nog?” asked Ben, not angry. Nog could not have known about the sensors. The fact that Nog was here could only mean one thing.

“Where is Jake?”

---

Without putting her book down, her teacup at her lips, Ziyal glanced over to the window.

Right at Jake.

“Oh, it’s you again,” she said, smiling. “You’re back.”

------------------------

Thanks for reading! Please reblog. I’ve also uploaded it to AO3 so you can leave comments and kudos! 

[Special thanks to @j0hnny0hm for proofreading this monster and knowing nothing about DS9]

#star trek #star trek ds9 #deep space nine #star trek fanfiction #the borrowers

[cyrelia-j]

[Ficlet] A Gift for my Darling III (mirror Garak/Bashir/Parmak)

In all honesty I'm not quite sure why this particular story is such a compulsion right now but it is what it is I guess. Sharing on the off chance someone other than me wants to keep going with the story so far. 

Parts 1 and 2 are here and here if you read the summary and warnings and still want on board this ride...

Summary: So in this story we have terran Julian having been given to Parmak as a gift from Garak. This crazy thing details some idk how to quite phrase it… daily life stuff of the three of them including the events occurring in the DS9 eps. Except the daily life stuff is supremely twisted and dark and features at the forefront the continued erosion of Julian's free will

WARNINGS: non consensual body modification, body horror, slave fic, dark, allusions to violence, torture, and rape/non con (I’m putting the non con warning extra here because while Julian’s [unreliable] narration expresses mainly acceptance/joy about his current situation and events it’s important to note that he’s only this way because his mind/self has been altered into it not because he actually is/was able to consent to anything done to him), also kind of OOC that’s explained and it’s mirror universe but still yeah OOC although Mirror Julian is still a prick

So if anyone’s still here for this here goes…

He hears a rumor of two strange arrivals on the station, one a Bajoran woman who looks exactly like The Intendant. The other one, Garak informs him with far too much amusement, is a Terran man who looks like Julian only “even more weak and useless”. The Klingons have taking to calling the other him “Garak’s pet” amongst themselves. It makes Julian bristle angrily. He’s not Garak’s pet he’s Doctor Parmak’s pet and he hopes they punish the insolent sods who have the audacity to make such a disgusting affront. Julian hates Klingons almost as much as he hates Cardassians. They talk down to him far worse than Garak’s men do, at least Garak’s men recognize his station. Some of them even call him Doctor Parmak’s assistant. Sometimes Doctor Parmak chooses not to correct them. 

Julian has been careful to listen for any news of the intruders. Garak has explained they’re from the other world. The other world is something that Julian also hates. If it wasn’t for the Terrans from the other world fucking up The Empire they would be the ones ruling now and it would be Garak kneeling at his feet. But Julian finds himself unsettled by their presence. If there’s another him then Doctor Parmak might decide that he’d like to have two Julians. This one’s even claimed to be a doctor already. His doctor has assured him that he has little interest in such a plain boring Julian, but Julian knows that it’s only The Intendant’s fascination with her own twin keeping that one from his doctor’s clutches.

That leaves him divided on Garak’s plan to kill The Intendant and have her other self take charge. Julian doesn’t particularly care if Garak is in charge of the station. It changes little for him. But if The Intendant is gone and there’s nothing protecting that other Julian then that leaves his doctor with a temptation that Julian would rather he didn’t have. Julian decides then that he’ll be sure to kill him when the time comes. Terran bodies are weak. He doesn’t imagine it will take much. 

Doctor Parmak had showed Julian once how many times that he had died when he was first given to his doctor. “See here’s where your heart had stopped from the trauma of the electrical current. And this one is where your poor little neck had been snapped. I think you may have broken your tibia, poor thing. I’m so pleased we were able to fix you up better than that. Ah and this one here was where your insides had ripped and bled out. Oh my little Julian you used to cry so terribly when we used you. But I made sure that it doesn’t hurt anymore now didn’t I? That’s because you’re such a good kitty.” Doctor Parmak is so kind, Julian is thankful for him. They don’t deserve his doctor on this miserable hot station.

“Are you going to fuck him then?” Julian finds himself asking Garak. He tells himself he doesn’t care what Garak does. Garak is an unimaginative murderous waste of scales and Julian would just as soon push him into one of the smelters and watch him burn. But he asks anyway and feels just a little... something when Garak considers the question far too long. “Didn’t you hear me?” he asks testily. “Do I have to yell it into those dense ridges of yours?” he demands sitting up on his knees. Garak smirks at him.

“And what if I do?” Garak drawls spitefully. “It would be easy, you know. It would seem that in the other world he and my counterpart are already involved. I would say that it would take little effort on my part to have him.” Julian swallows hard. He knows Garak is just taking the piss. He really wants to bite him but Doctor Parmak had put the little metal plates in so Garak could lock his jaw. Doctor Parmak said that it was cruel to leave Julian without his arms so if Garak must do something about his biting he can turn the plates on instead. Julian doesn’t particularly care for the plates but it’s much better than losing his arms. Doctor Parmak showed him that his voice implant can still talk normally without needing to move his mouth. It’s jut an affectation that’s not necessary. Garak says it unnerves him. Julian talks to him a lot with his mouth closed when he wants to make him mad, when he wants to unnerve the Cardies on the station.

Julian scents the air to reassure himself that Garak is only trying to initiate sex and not serious about looking for that Terran. It’s there. Faintly- Garak must be holding himself back just to make him angrier- but it’s there. “If this is the part where I’m supposed to give you a jobby because I give two fucks if you want to bugger some Terran weakling you can fucking suck yourself.” He snatches the PADD back up, glancing at Garak out of the corner of his eye. He tries to be discreet but Garak catches the expression regardless.

“Perhaps I’ll have my Terran weakling do it for me then,” Garak teases from his writing. Garak, Julian has learned from things he leaves out, likes to write absolutely abysmal poetry and short stories.

“Go on then,” Julian grumbles not understanding why his sexual response is so keenly tied to Garak’s as of late. It’s always been just Doctor Parmak.

Julian watches Garak lean back smugly and he slams the PADD down. He may have broken it. It’s all Garak’s fault anyway and Doctor Parmak understands that.  

“Fine, wanker, you fucking win!” he growls standing up flipping his hair as he stalks over to the couch. Garak is beaming up at him. “Jealous, kitty?” Garak asks using the name like Doctor Parmak does. Julian can feel his eyes steel over furiously. He’s standing over Garak thinking how easy it would be to rip his throat out, teeth or no teeth. His tail swishes angrily. He still... remembers how to fight, how to attack, how to... hurt them... Garak looks up at him and calmly sets down what he was writing.

Julian lunges at him, the force and weight sending the couch backwards with both of them on it. He lands on top of Garak, seeing just a hint of fear there, blended with that arousal as he tastes the air between them both. Julian is breathing hard with excitement. He leans in, smiling for Garak prettily. He shifts, straddling him, feeling Garak’s thick body between his thighs. He hopes Garak’s uniform fucking reeks of him the next day. “Yes,” Julian says with a purr. He isn’t sure why he was trying to hurt Garak now. This feels so much better. Julian laps at his mouth just like a little kitten and feels a rush of pleasure so strong that it nearly shorts out the servos in his arms. “Yes,” he whispers again giving a long swipe of his tongue to the side of Garak’s face. 

Doctor Parmak said that he would make it nice for him if he was nice for Garak. He feels that swim in his head again and nearly drowns drunk on it. He feels Garak shiver beneath him, head going back just a bit, showing Julian his throat. It would be so easy. One bite, one good hard bite. Julian blinks. He wants to keep feeling good like this. His body agrees. Julian laps at his throat, softly, lightly, shutting his eyes deliriously. His hands move from Garak’s shoulders, pawing at the armor on his chest. He still has trouble with fine motor skills. Garak gives his ear a scratch, then tugs at it roughly. Julian purrs again. “That’s a good kitty.”

Julian still hasn’t quite formulated a plan for his escape, but they’re out of the conduit. That’s step one. They’re into the hall and Smiley is going to take him to the runabouts and they’re going to figure it out from there. He doesn’t have time to try and sort the particulars, his mind already working fast as it can to analyze probabilities, odds, but he just doesn’t have enough data. All Julian knows is that he and Kira have to escape this insanity. They have to get out of there. They have to get back. They don’t belong here in this world and every minute that Julian spends here he thinks he’ll go mad. He nearly turns the corner, the alarms blaring but Smiley holds up a hand.

“Wait.” Julian listens, hearing the footsteps, not sure how he’d missed it before with his hearing but it’s there. They aren’t the hasty heavy steps of his Klingon pursuers though, they’re... different. There’s only one of them and it’s not something he recognizes. Julian takes a cautious step back but freezes cold when he hears something that sounds like his own voice calling out to him.

“Oi! You Terran pieces of shite aren’t fooling anyone! I can already smell you both!” Of course he knew intellectually that there should be another him. Julian had just assumed... without his enhancements... a slow boy in a world like this. When he hadn’t seen himself he just assumed the worst.

“Julian?” Miles whispers fearfully next to him. “Whatever that is I swear you don’t want to see it.” Julian doesn’t understand what’s gotten into him all of a sudden. The footsteps draw closer and Julian realizes that the voice he heard was like his but it wasn’t. It was... artificial. “Julian, please, we have to go now. You said it yerself, we can’t stay here...” Miles pulls at him and he almost turns, his self preservation nearly outweighing his curiosity but then he sees it. And then he realizes that no, death wasn’t the worst possible scenario.

“Oh my god.” Those are the first words that leave his mouth as the creature steps around the corner. Creature is the first word that comes to mind. Like Frankenstein’s creature stitched together from so many imperfect parts. Julians hand comes up to his mouth shaking as he stares at it; the monster wearing his face and nearly falls to his knees. It’s... it’s him or rather it’s... something that may have once been him. Julian doesn’t know what catches his eyes first. It stalks around the corner coming closer to them, the most prominent feature are the black metal arms whirring softly as he walks. They’re... they’re soldered or something or God Julian doesn’t know how they’re attached but he can see the scar tissue heavy on his torso at both shoulder, at his chest which... which has a massive incision scar running down the center. There are stitched together skin pieces everywhere or at least what resemble various patchwork making a body. Julian can actually tell which ones were once his.

The creature is only wearing a pair of shorts, a pair of boots wrapped over the knee and Julian can see the collar around his... No... not it’s not a collar. It’s his throat. It’s his neck with a piece of metal welded? around it, the light at the center blinking and that’s when Julian realizes it... it has metal plates at the jaw that seem to be holding it shut- at least right now. It has his face. It has his face and it’s looking at him disdainfully as those arms cross.

“You get a good look, Terran?” he hears it ask, fears confirmed when he hears the voice but doesn’t see the mouth moving. His mouth his turned down in what seems a perpetual scowl but even that doesn’t all quite prepare him for the ears. They’re... they’re gray cat ears sticking out from his wild brown hair grown long to his shoulders. Julian sees a tail as well swishing and he knows his hand is trembling over his mouth as he tries to understand what it is he’s seeing.

“My god I... you’re... you’re me but what-” “I’m not you, Terran. Don’t let the talk go to your fucking head, you and are aren’t the same.” “What happened to you?!” Julian asks dropping his hand still trying to understand what he’s seeing. The slaves he worked next to... none of them looked like this. He hadn’t seen anything like this creature and he doesn’t understand. He can see his vision clouding over and blinks back the water in his eyes. “Doctor Parmak,” he hears Smiley practically spit beside him. “Jesus, Julian, I thought you were dead!” Julian turns, but Smiley isn’t talking to him. He’s talking to the creature in front of them. Julian hears a snort.

“You and them wish I was dead, Terran? You were all eager enough to let these lizard fuckers have a go at me but no, I’m not fucking dead.” It sounds angry and Julian doesn’t understand what’s going on. Dead? Was he captured? Why wasn’t he working with the rest. Julian had seen men killed but not-

“What the hell did that monster do to you, Julian?” Smiley asks, and Julian can hear his voice starting to tighten. Julian can’t imagine. It looks like it hurts. All of it looks like it hurt. He doesn’t know how those arms don’t rip off his torso. He doesn’t know how those scars don’t hurt, how his throat, how his jaw aren’t in agony. He can’t open his mouth, god he can’t... they took his arms. They... How... how could someone...

“Don’t you dare talk about Doctor Parmak, Smiley. Say what you want about the rest of these scaly bastards but you keep my doctor’s name off your tongue. He fixed me. The mines fuck up your bloody eyesight? Christ you buggers stink.” Julian sees its nose wrinkle and he sees the lights moving when it speaks. He couldn’t imagine... how many surgeries... how many months of recovery, what they would’ve had to do to him to- Those are fangs... or a cat’s teeth, he’s sure he sees a fang there and how... how does it not hurt? How does this Julian not know...

“Your doctor? Julian you... you told me...” He can hear Smiley’s voice start to break. “You told me you killed your old man cause he wanted to change you... you... you told me you were terrified of him... you couldn’t sleep without a knife cause you were afraid he’s let ‘em take ya and...”

“Don’t talk about my old man, Smiley.” It uncrosses its arms and walks over to them both, tail flicking back and forth. Julian doesn’t want to look at it closer. It hurts. It hurts him because it doesn’t...He... Julian, what the hell is wrong with you, he’s you! He’s you, he’s not a thing he’s a human being! He’s a human being some Doctor Parmak tortured and twisted and... and how could a man call himself a doctor and do that to a man? To another living creature? It... He... Julian looks at him coldly. “Garak tried to take the piss saying he was gonna have a go at you. Fuck me, mate, he’d break you so easily.” The mirror Julian laughs and Julian croaks out a sickened “Garak” in response. He thinks he’s going to vomit.

It’s almost a blessing when the Klingons find them.

(I know you all didn't think that Julian was just a cute lil' neko right. I'm way more screwed up than that lol

Anyhoo, here's Part 4)

#star trek ds9 #star trek deep space nine #ds9 fanfic #mirror universe #dark and twisted #julian bashir #kelas parmak #elim garak #garak/bashir/parmak #see warnings #fanfic #cyrelia-j

[shananaomi]

2017.

Giving myself an hour on the clock to get through this, if at all possible. (ETA: Done!) 

Here’s 2016.

What did you do in 2017 that you'd never done before?

I have such a great answer to this that I’m still not ready to write about. Ask me in person and I might tell you. Also: went to yoga fairly regularly and found I both could and wanted to lay peacefully in one pose or another for 5 or 10 minutes at a time.

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions and will you make more for next year?

We did in fact #GetFitToFightFascism, or anyway on days when I didn’t know how else to treat the creeping anxiety I got up and hiked to the Observatory or somewhere else so ridiculously stunning that I felt slightly reassured we’d live another day. We were determined to see our BFF Jamie every Saturday night and except for weekends when one of us or the other was out of town or we had plans already for the weekend we had a near-perfect attendance record. And though I didn’t think I wrote that much, I got enough out in TinyLetter (now backposted at Medium) to add up to a decent Twitter thread last week. 

I always feel like next year should maybe be its own post, but for now I’m thinking about: Writing, always. Reading more. And finding a way to host maybe monthly dinners for small groups of our friends at home.

Did anyone close to you give birth?

My childhood best friend’s daughter was born on New Year’s Day 2017 and we finally got to meet her last week. She is able to reach for and drink from a glass of beer so I think she’ll be just fine.

What countries did you visit?

This was a year between big adventures out of the country, but we just booked a February getaway to Puerto Vallarta to celebrate the 10th anniversary of our first date. Went back and forth to New York a few times, plus a quickie up to SF for work.

What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017?

Confidence the pendulum will in fact swing back from fascism.

What date from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I guess the run from January 19 (Hamilton) to January 20 (bus trip from NYC to DC, with the worst possible welcome from post-Inaugural attendees) to January 21 (meeting up with so many old friends at the Women’s March). The rest is still vividly sharp but not so much tied to any specific date.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Surviving it with some semblance of hope. Making the move to a better, bigger place in Pasadena. Leading a loyal and devoted staff through a major corporate transition and many other hard challenges.

What was your biggest failure?

I have never done anything as hard as being a boss lady, and I’m still not sure most days I’ve left things at least better than I found them.

Did you suffer illness or injury?

For the first 9 months or so I got super sick every single goddamned month: a recurring case of America, I called it.  Overall I’ve been very lucky.

What was the best thing you bought?

The peace of mind that privilege allows when you need to pay your way out of a loud, anxiety-ridden neighborhood for the quieter (at least most days) and more serene outskirts of town. A weekly outlet and focus for my physical stress in the form of the most amazing personal trainer. A 40th birthday blowout weekend that included renting the most ridiculous house (as seen when CJ fell into the pool in The West Wing), hosting a dinner party and then pool party for so many of our friends and family.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

My wife’s, always. Because all I do these days is listen to Kesha, I’ve been thinking about these lines:

I know forever don’t exist But after this life, I’ll find you in the next So when I say “forever,” it’s the goddamned truth

Where did most of your money go?

The house and moving into it, the car, the trainer, the birthday celebrations.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Did I?

We discovered Two Bunch Palms, an old getaway near Palm Springs that soothed my soul in quiet calm ways I hadn’t realized could be so close at hand or that I needed so much. This year’s LA Pride parade became a protest and was the most joyous and community-filled day like that we’ve felt in a long, long time.

What song will always remind you of 2017?

This fairly goes to Kesha’s “Praying,” but since I already wrote a whole thing about that, I’ll say Julia Michaels’ “Don’t Wanna Think,” in part because I listened to it on repeat for so many hours in a row while flying back and forth from New York that it’s kind of embedded in my subconscious: I’m not really one for drinking songs, but — fuck it, here it comes. Heartbreak is annoying, and I’ll feel it in the morning. Swallow it down like a bitter pill. At least it will taste better than this feeling will. I don’t like myself when I’m just standing still.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Happier, though I’d say that’s grading on a goddamned curve for real.

ii. thinner or fatter? About the same, if trimmer and stronger in some places.

iii. richer or poorer? Close to a draw here, more or less.

What do you wish you'd done more of?

I was happiest when I was hiking, reading, sitting quietly on the couch with my wife and dog. I did a decent amount of all that but it was still to keep my head above water.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Be on the goddamned internet. But I’m also aware that finding the right balance between awareness and mindfulness and rest and action is the most pervasive and elusive self-care challenge for literally everyone I know, so I’m trying hard not to give myself a hard time about it. And there’s probably something here to say about the betrayal and pain that came from incorrectly trusting people to be their best selves instead of being undeserving of the benefit of the doubt but I am working so fucking hard at leaving that behind in 2017.

How did you spend Christmas?

In Reno with my family and friends, bouncing between two houses full of other people’s people (and mine) and a lot of very rich and exotic meats and liquors. The last couple years have been really hard and not well-balanced or rejuvenating visits, and this year was much better if still not without its own drama.

What was your favorite TV program?

New: Star Trek: Discovery was almost everything I needed in a show this year. Also I loved The Arrangement and found it way smarter and more complicated and fucked up than I’d expected.

New to me: I was only a little late on Riverdale but found it very enjoyable.

Oldies but Goodies: Also I watched a lot of older Star Trek, from TOS to the early movies. Everyone keeps saying next week need to do DS9, so I guess that’s the kind of geek I am proudly now.

What friends did you make or meet this year for the first time?

All but one were not new but I really loved our all-girl get-togethers to watch hockey even when we barely paid attention to it.

What was the best book you read?

I didn’t make a real resolution about reading more but boy did I. It’s just so much better than being in the world or on the internet. The ones that really stand out are Queen of the Night by Alexander Chee (not from this year, but my fave read from it), John Green’s Turtles All the Way Down, and Amy Bloom’s White Houses, which comes out in a couple months. If we’re not already GoodReads friends come find me there—I’m terrible at writing reviews but I find it super helpful personally to know what y’all have read and liked?

What did you want and get?

A new house.

What did you want and not get?

A Japanese wooden soaking tub of my very own. (See below.)

What was your favorite film of this year?

We just saw Call Me By Your Name last night and now I can’t think of anything else. Though I’d say the sheer joy of Wonder Woman is still a solid contender.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I was 40, and I took 5 days to basically do only what I wanted, and it did the exact trick I’d hoped for: I just enjoyed it instead of ruthlessly evaluating what I haven’t done with my life.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? What political issue stirred you the most? Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I am going to charitably say the answer to all three of these is both obvious and tiresome. Be better, 2018.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?

Lots of jumpsuits and DVF, all courtesy a Rent the Runway Unlimited subscription, which also falls under where all my money went but was a ton of fun and practical in many ways too.

What kept you sane?

Remembering how many amazing women are already in my life and know exactly what I mean even when I can barely say it out loud.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Ugh, this one feels too much like work and also like tempting fate.

Who did you miss?

For the first time in a while there were frankly some people who I miss greatly but was glad didn’t have to live through this shit themselves.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017.

Just because it could have been worse doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be better.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Here’s what I wrote about 3 songs that shaped my 2017. I don’t think I can do much better in one quote.

What’s one photo that sums up your year?

#2017 #yearly update

[captain-jimmeh]

fun questions!!

tagged by: @fatiguedvulcan!! 🤠

tagging: @iwouldtrek500miles @transgenderworm & whoever else wants to do this! 

1. what color is your hair brush?

turquoise!

2. a food you never eat?

fish

3. are you typically too warm or too cold?

i’m freezing 60% of the time

4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago?

watching ds9 lmao

5. what is your favorite candy bar?

mmmm I prefer sour patch kids

6. have you ever been to a professional sporting event?

mostly just college football games

7. what was the last thing you said out loud?

i grunted at my sister few minutes ago

8. what is your favorite ice cream?

birthday cake!!

9. what was the last thing you had to drink?

hot tea :-)

10. do you like your wallet?

yes, but it’s falling apart a lil bit

11. what was the last thing you ate?

trader joe’s hot cheetos 

12. did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

i did not

13. the last sporting event you watched?

uhhhhh rugby game? in november??? maybe

14. what is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

butter and white cheddar plx

15. who was the last person you sent a text message to?

group chat for my friend’s minecrafter server lol

16. ever go camping?

as of recently, yes! went on a long camping trip in the fall, which was my first time camping in like 10 years

17. do you take vitamins?

i should

18. do you go to church every sunday?

nah I’m Jewish

19. do you have a tan?

a slight tan which is quickly fading

20. do you prefer chinese food or pizza?

pizza gal my dude

21. do you drink your soda with a straw?

i don’t drink soda often enough to have a preference

22. what color socks do you usually wear?

my sock drawer is a rainbow, but i’d guess most are purple? black?? gray?

23. ever drive above the speed limit?

terrible habit but yes, usually

24. what terrifies you?

aaaaaa i got a lot of deep-seated anxiety about not being able to read a room and fit in with unspoken “social rules.” otherwise, mold.

25. look to your left, what do you see?

candles! :^))

26. what chore do you hate?

washing gunky dishes by hand, without a doubt

27. what do you think of when you hear an australian accent?

noice

28. what is your favorite soda?

aaaaaa does root beer count?

29. do you go to a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

i like going inside to loiter when I’m with friends. plus it feels like the wait is shorter inside

30. who was the last person you talked to?

my sister

31. favorite cut of beef?

beef hurts my stomach :(

32. last song you listened to?

musical genius - Dorian Electra

33. last book you read?

Citizen by Claudia Rankine. A beautifully written and culturally important read, especially in light of the protests this past week. (alt answer: Waiting for Godot by Samuel Beckett, but i suppose that’s technically a play lol)

34. favorite day of the week?

Friday! I have classes only Mon-Thu this quarter, so Friday is the start of my long weekend

35. can you say the alphabet backwards?

with much difficulty, sometimes, and you’ll have to give me some time to do it

36. how do you like your coffee?

mixed with oat milk bc a bitch is lactose intolerant

37. favorite pair of shoes?

I have some platformed heeled doc martens that are *chef’s kiss* perfection

38. at what time do you usually go to bed?

as of late, anytime between 3am and 5am

39. at what time do you usually get up?

10:30am, right as class is starting 🤡

40. what do you prefer: sunrises or sunsets?

sunrise; it’s quiet and magical

41. how many blankets are on your bed?

one fluffy blanket, and one comforter

42. describe your kitchen plates?

they got fruit vines around the edges

43. do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?

moscow mule is the go-to

44. do you play cards?

for drinking games, of course

45. what color is your car?

dark gray

46. can you change a tire?

probably not

47. what is your favorite province?

don’t have an answer for this one

48. favorite job you ever had?

haven’t had too many, so I suppose a research job i had on campus

49. how did you get your biggest scar?

i tried to jump on a chair and missed, slicing my shin in the process

50. what did you do today that made someone happy?

i hugged my mom :^)

#me

[aceofwands]

Ria hateblogs Star Trek Discovery: Episode 6 “Lethe”

This week I’m really feeling the disappointment that I’m not here, 6 weeks in to a new Star Trek series, eagerly awaiting and watching each new episode every week with my family, like I expected and hoped. I don’t even know that I should bother hateblogging the few remaining episodes of this half of the season, it’s like ... it’s just so awful and the writing is terrible and I feel nothing but apathy for the characters and the plot ... I guess I’ll see how bad this week’s episode is

Wow, I will admit, it’s real neat seeing Vulcan in 2017 graphics. I wish it was under better circumstances ...

This aide to Sarek has such a bowl cut, it’s cringe worthy :/

... what. Ignorance is never beneficial? How is it remotely helpful to a mission to not know what it is or why you’re going there?! ugh, the writing for these characters is just so ... artificial ... it’s a problem with so much modern storytelling, it’s like they’re more concerned with having characters say cool dramatic things rather than having actual conversations

The Disco shirts are sooooo dumb. Why wouldn’t they say Discovery in full?

does she have a personality Tilly? does she?

lol Enterprise mention, because we can totally believe that this grimdark holographic spinning mess of a ship exists at the same time as Pike’s Enterprise

cut to Voq, oops I mean Tyler, and Lorca on a Klingon ship apparently

what is this a video game? oh lol, it IS, it’s the HOLODECK because they have those in the 23rd century FFS

lol Voq’s worried his cover was blown when Lorca interrogated his backstory

right. the random prisoner you just found should definitely be your security chief

“someone i can trust” HA it’s SO OBVIOUS HE’S A SPY - so now Lorca just seems stupid as well as an asshole

back to Sarek and the aide ... who just injected himself with something dubious

a Vulcan fanatic who believes humans are inferior ... whoooo just blew himself up

WOW this is bad

like this is the story you needed to tell? so much possibility for a Star Trek series in 2017 with serialisation and this is the series we end up with?

Michael instructing Tilly in the ways of being healthy is just ... why? is this supposed to show that they’re friends? are people really seeing this as cute banter? I just don’t get it

are they gonna go befriend the Klingon spy?

oh good, even better, Tilly thinks he’s hot

“my mentor, Michael” cringe.

how can Michael have spent 7 years amongst humans on the Shenzhou and need Tilly’s guidance on social interaction like shaking hands?

yeeeeah Rick Berman was excited that Enterprise was a Star Trek series where people wore sneakers, having them in a show set in the 23rd century just reinforces - along with the tactical vests and t-shirts that look like they’re straight out of any modern cop show - that this isn’t even set in the future

oh good, Michael is telepathically connected to Sarek still ... wow, this whole sequence is really dumb. like, why are they bonded? how can she sense his pain? HOW CAN THEY MIND MELD ACROSS SPACE?

ethnically diverse Vulcans are the best though

raising a human as a Vulcan just seems like emotional torture tbh? like how ethically dubious?

BEING RAISED AS VULCAN DOES NOT GIVE YOU VULCAN ABILITIES

“how can he put that kind of pressure on a child” GOOD QUESTION

renegade Vulcans tried to murder you

ka’tra has healing powers?! WHAT IS THIS BS

look, okay, it’s one thing to establish new things when you’re making up a series - but this is exactly the problem with saying your series is a prequel and part of the prime universe which has had 5 series worth of content, to then contradict it all by making up nonsense using established canon ... What’s the point? Why not just make a reboot? Set it in a parallel universe, which it obviously is. If you’re so desperate to get away from canon then don’t tell us it’s part of it! But more importantly, if you’re that desperate to ignore it and rewrite it and change it ... why not just make something new?

Lorca has shown 0 compassion to anyone before ever, why would he help her personal request?

these holograms are just so Star Wars, it bothers me every time

“there are protocols to be followed” but they’ve never followed them before, so why would they now lol

Stamets really is different - why couldn’t have been this fun from the start? “groovy” “super cool” “Sarekvision” “psychic hit of speed”

“are you really that crazy?” ummm have you met Michael?

Michael, Tilly, and Voq-Tyler on a shuttle going into a nebula to mind meld with Sarek and find it, what could possibly go wrong?

so many holograms. sigh.

lol Admiral came to see Lorca in person and tell him off  for launching an unauthorised mission led by a mutineer and a POW who has barely had time to recover - and I quote "can you even trust this guy?"

because that's how Starfleet Admirals speak

sigh. I miss proper Star Trek. this FEELS like 2017. it feels like these people just stepped out of today and onto these spaceships. it doesn’t feel like 2250-whatever. add all the holograms you want, holograms do not maketh the future - there was a tone, an aesthetic quality, including goofy space clothes and Shakespearean dialogue, that made it feel like it wasn’t happening now

“I checked him out” ya-huh, you’re gonna have egg on your face when it’s dramatically revealed that he’s a Klingon spy lol

the cornerstone of their entire defence against the Klingons is a science vessel with an experimental mushroom drive ... I can’t even with this show

Lt Stamets engaging in eugenics - hey yeah, I forgot that was an issue, funny how they’re happy to throw away 90% of what we know but keep the tiniest parts, it just makes it all so meaningless

and now they’re having a drink ... so that whole scene was just to remind us that Starfleet exists and remind us that Discovery is important to the war ... they really have to do a lot of telling on this show don’t they?

oh good, the tac vests are back

right. of course. who else would Sarek’s thoughts turn to when he’s dying? not his wife. not his son. YOU. “I was supposed to be his proof that Humans and Vulcans could co-exist as equals” ???? the Federation has existed for almost a century by this point! he LITERALLY HAS A HUMAN WIFE and that half-Human son they keep forgetting - WHY THE ACTUAL FUCK WOULD HE NEED A HUMAN WARD TO PROVE ANYTHING??????

YOU’RE his greatest disappointment? not that he’s fucked up his relationship with his son? or y’know, his full Vulcan son off making a cult?

we’ve done this storyline so many times in more interesting ways - the original, Spock - Worf raised by humans

oh good, Michael and Sarek fighting ... in his mind ...

AND THEN WE’RE BACK TO LORCA AND ADMIRAL DRINKING WHISKEY?

bleeeuuuugh

“some of the decisions you’ve been making lately are troubling” Sooooo stop him? if only there was a chain of command?

I’m glad someone’s calling him out for being awful, but why is it a friendly chat?

oh, he passed psych evals and tests with flying colours. right.

lord please stop flirting. is that ... sleazy saxophone music?

WHAT.

ARE YOU SERIOUS SHOW?

she has GENUINE CONCERNS about his ability and mental state as a Captain and instead of telling other Admirals or having an official meeting or hearing ... she goes to talk to him directly, and then allows him to distract her by seducing her?

this has gotta be the worst written piece of crap I’ve seen in years. and I just rewatched the DS9 season 1 gems The Passenger and Move Along Home. I’ve seen Threshold, and These are the Voyages, and Shades of Grey. All of which, are better than this show’s first 6 episodes have been.

how is the Klingon spy the best character on the show? the only one with any compassion or actual emotions - is it because he’s trying to be a perfect human

they finally mentioned Spock! wait, isn’t Spock supposed to be on the Enterprise at this point? oh no right it’s 7 years before. LOL Sarek chose Spock over Michael AND THEN SPOCK REJECTED THE SCIENCE ACADEMY

why must we come back to Sarek at all? was this story really necessary? was it burning to be told? like ... what do we gain from it? does it add to his character, or Spock’s? 

Admiral found some scars on Lorca’s back in bed ... and poked them while he was asleep. LOL “you sleep with a phaser in your bed and you say nothing’s wrong?” THAT DOESN’T EVEN MAKE SENSE???? WHY would he have a phaser in his bed? who’s gonna attack him on his own ship?

“all these months I have ignored the signs” and it took this to finally tip you off? geezus. good lord. and she’s not like the other Admirals at Starfleet - I mean, okay actually this is the only thing the show has gotten right so far, they always were idiots lol

“I can’t leave Starfleet’s most powerful weapon in the hands of a broken man”

lol she doesn’t believe his plea not to take his ship away, and him admitting he needs help - I don’t believe him either

Saru we knew he was severely wounded, that was the whole point.

lol is he gonna get the Admiral killed so she backs off? what am I saying, of course he is - I mean, of course this diplomatic negotiation with the Klingons he’s sending her off to is going to get her killed

how can he give Michael a bridge position when she’s a criminal? this whole thing makes no sense. why did they go this nonsense route? other than for the sake of drama (oh wait, that’s the only reason they do anything on this show)

why does the replicator tell you how nutritious your food is

oh of course Voq is gonna befriend and flirt with Michael.

lord, could someone please please tell the writers that they’re supposed to show emotions, not have characters explain what they’re feeling through clunky exposition

“it’s just being human” LOL IT’S FUNNY CAUSE HE’S KLINGON

lol yep, cut to neutral territory, let’s watch as this show’s THIRD FEMALE CHARACTER IS KILLED oh no she’s just been taken hostage LOL

“notify Starfleet Command, ask for orders” W O W he is an ASSHOLE

oh good, next episode is a time loop. Mudd’s back. Voq kisses Michael. 

how is it that this show is serialised and yet feels more disjointed than say, the serial arcs of DS9? every episode it’s like ... Stuff Happens ... and it’s very very loosely connected to what happened before, but seems to be mostly at random?? like, reflecting on what I just watched, not a lot of anything happened? their plots were literally, Sarek is attacked and they rescue him because space telepathy is a thing, so Michael can have some drama I guess ... and Lorca sleeps with the Admiral who realises he’s a dangerous asshole, recommends her for a dangerous mission, then refuses to rescue her. that’s it. 

Like dude, I just rewatched DS9′s Duet and In the Hands of the Prophets last night. This rubbish doesn’t even hold a candle to it??? Kira’s entire emotional arc in season 1 from Emissary, through Past Prologue, Battle Lines, Progress, Duet, and In The Hands of the Prophets, is more nuanced, engaging, and well crafted than Michael’s emotional arc as the protagonist of Discovery. and they weren’t even allowed to do proper serialisation at that point??

#hateblogging #anti Discovery #STD #spoilers #I guess #though its reeeeally obvious

[wellntruly]

tagged by @emungere, thank you!!!

Do Dis: List all the things you’re currently working on in as much or little detail as you’d like, then tag some friends to see what they’re working on. This can be writing, art, vids, gifsets, whatever.

Hahahaha. WELL. This question feels somehow custom geared for me and also something I am completely unqualified for all at the same time!

1. The Best Screenshots I Took While Watching Star Trek: DS9, continued

2. I’ve also been meaning to make at least one collection of my best shots from LEGION, given the perpetual dissonance of my feelings for it vs my brief (yet intense) content production

2. I mean, all of them, but a recent milestone is figuring out all the groups for my DS9 bottle episode, “The One Where They’re Up All Night.” They are: - late in the night Dax calls O’Brien when something breaks fantastically. in the process of fixing it they somehow end up halfway across the station, and run into Julian out there. weird, but typical. - Kira and Sisko each roll up to Ops to pull an all-nighter, immediately turning it into a co-all-nighter/philosophy sesh/bitchfest about everyone who’s presently annoying them. it is fucking adorable. - Worf is on a solitary ramble/quest, tbd but lots of intent climbing through Jefferies tubes - Odo and Garak would be on solitary rambles, but instead keep running into each other all over the station, like they’re caught in each other’s orbit. they carry on a conversation this way, like strange delayed in-person texting. - ultimately all the sets independently wind up in the Replimat at godforsaken oh-hundred hours in the morning and are like, well I guess we should just have a big group breakfast because what else are we doing

3. There are MANY MOVIES beginning to come out that i want to see, so am anticipating kicking into high gear on my movie blog. Presently: do I go see new Blade Runner?

4. Trying to finally finish getting my apartment together. I am going to go pick up a Craigslist chair tonight in fact! Wonderfully, the Wisdom Of The Crowd has already picked where it will go, as whenever I have extra friends over the person who takes the ground always picks the exact same spot.

Tagging: Can I tag everyone?? What are you UP to buds!

#replies #emungere #pers. #Tarra Treks #Star Trek DS9 #movies

[dramallamadingdang]

Lotsa replies

Figured I’d better do ‘em before I get absorbed in writing up this tutorial thing...

These go back a ways because I’ve been, as usual, lazy/preoccupied. :) They’re for @esotheria-sims, @maybesomethingdunno, @nerianasims, @penig, @holleyberry, @plumbobsquareface (who has an awesome username), @immerso-sims, @eulaliasims, @lisac-h, @mustluvcatz-reloaded, @sim-boo, @acquiresimoleons, @pensblr, @didilysims, annnnnnnnd @mrningbrd...

Geez, I need to not put off doing these like this... And I should probably split this up, but...meh.

esotheria-sims replied to your post “So, um....”

Well, with an introduction like this, even if I *weren't* interested in the stuff you have to offer (spoiler alert: I am), I'd still be curious to see what it is at the very least. :) Some of those old Pandorasims sets (if those are what you were referring to here) could definitely use better textures.

Yup, some of the stuff is from Pandorasims, indeed. And from xxxsims. Slig did some nice recolors of some of the latter’s stuff, at least, but I want to high-res ‘em a bit and do some different colors for my own uses. The Pandora stuff, though? Needs serious help. I mean, I get that the textures for these items were probably not the main attraction and all, but...well, such things are important to me. :) I want my game to look nice even if no one sees this particular aspect of it but me. And I imagine storytellers would want better-looking textures, too, for pics/videos.

maybesomethingdunno replied to your post “So, um....”

Generally speaking, I feel like if you want to create something (whether it's Sims content, a story, or a goofy sketch), then create it. When it comes to Sims content, there's always someone who'll download and appreciate the content. Simmers are a diverse breed with a wild assortment of stories, hoods, and gameplay needs/desires. So on the heels of "If you want to make it, make it" is "If you want to share what you've made, share it." Kinky Sims for all! :D

*high five* Yeah, I know what you mean and that’s generally my attitude, too. This stuff, however, was going to be just for me, but then I got to thinking about how there’s a dearth of nice-looking stuff of this type and...Well, I can do something about that. I think, anyway. We’ll see, with some of the stuff. But, due to the more sensitive nature of this kind of stuff...Well, I second-guess. :)

nerianasims replied to your post “So, um....”

I'm interested and have no need to be anon about it. (Also grr 50 Shades times a million, such a horrible example and SO badly written to boot.)

OMG, don’t even get me started. I mean, OK, yeah, the whole thing sort of normalized mine and my husband’s lifestyle a little bit which on the one hand might be a good thing....but on the other hand, it didn’t do it right. Even if it was well-written (which it totally isn’t; it was a bad Twilight fanfic that was obviously written by someone who’d never had even remotely kinky sex, much less any contact with real people who practice BDSM), it portrayed an abusive relationship, not the sort of thing real people who are into this sort of thing practice. Just...ugh. Awful, awful thing. >:(

penig replied to your photo “Owen has…interesting…jammies.  And, like Aaron when he was a kid, Owen...”

What pervert even made those in a kid's size?

Skell, I think. I think it’s part of her repository project. I don’t think it’s necessarily perverted, though, especially not in game context. I mean, if you go by the speech bubbles, kids regularly talk about sex with their parents/siblings at the dinner table in the game. :) But even if that wasn’t the case...Well, kids will wear or have or do inappropriate things that they don’t know are inappropriate. They just think it’s pretty or something. Like, in this case, I imagine Owen likes those jammie pants just because they have purple hearts on them. He’s purple, so he likes purple things. :) He has no idea what they mean, and his parents probably think it’s funny. Because they’re that way.

holleyberry replied to your photo “Do you think she adores him? I think she adores him. He, of course, is...”

What's a Gilsbruty to do?

Not much, apparently. *grumble* CERTAINLY NOT PROCREATE! *glares at Simon and wills him to pass on his genes, dammit!*

plumbobsquareface replied to your post “Were-Klingons! Actually, wouldn't that be a nice idea for a default...”

i'm so glad to see other simers that are also into star trek :')

Ohhhhh, I’m a big huge honking dorky Trek nerd. Even published a fanzine, back in the day, was heavily involved in Usenet newsgroups in the early days of the internet and was staff on one of the big-at-the-time forums when such things came to be. I’m not in the fandom per se anymore at all for various reasons, but I’ll always watch the shows and read fanfic and that sort of thing. (DS9 is my fave. TOS will always have a special place in my heart, of course, but most of my Trekker heart belongs to DS9. :) )

immerso-sims replied to your photo “Aaron GilsCarbo, dancing like the nerd he is.”

Dem pink sandals tho ;)

Aren’t they precious? He actually aged into the outfit all by his little self and the pink sandals just sort of define him. That and the surfer hair. :)

maybesomethingdunno replied to your photo “This is Josephine. Young, pregnant with an unknown number of babies,...”

Next she will become addicted to Sim cat nip :P

...And then she’ll be in and out of rehab for the rest of her life. Such a sad, sad tale of woe. :)

lisac-h replied to your photo “Aaron rolled up a want for that “I was abducted by aliens”...”

Mark Twain saw Worf and said, "Werewolf!"

He did, didn’t he? HAH! :D God, it’s been forever since I’ve watched TNG. It’s not my favorite of the shows, but I should give it a rewatch one of these days...

eulaliasims replied to your post “Oh, God, it’s the 10 questions meme again!”

I would add an evil laughter gif here, but Tumblr won't let me, so you'll have to imagine it. :P Yeah, it can be surprisingly hard to find historical fiction that isn't focused on romance sometimes. I don't mind some, but when it seems to take over the rest of the story... meh. That's what I read fanfic for. And now I have the Ride of the Valkyries in my head too, but at least it's not Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer again.

It’s not that I can’t deal with ANY romance in historical fiction. I can if it makes sense within the story and the real history because, hey, these were real people and they fell in love and had relationships and all that. One of my favorite books (The Sunne in Splendour, by Sharon Kay Penman) is about Richard III, and a chunk of the 1000-page plot is about the relationship between him and his eventual wife and what impact that had on him as a person which in turn affected what kind of king he was, and that’s all good. But then there are those that are set in, say, Henry VIII’s court and it’s all thinly-veiled trashy romance novel tripe. (Yes, Philippa Gregory, I’m looking at you.) If I want that, I’ll sit and watch The Tudors, for God’s sake because ooh! Really hot men, gayness, AND boobies, yay! :) I’d rather read about about how that court really was. I mean, it was intriguing enough without having to pruriently sex it up. :p 

Geez, this is my “ragging on popular books” post, apparently. :) And you’re welcome for Ride of the Valkyries. *evil* It is now, thankfully out of my head.

mustluvcatz-reloaded replied to your post “Oh, God, it’s the 10 questions meme again!”

I'm half tempted to answer your questions just because they're so NOT about the sims, but I may be too lazy to right now, lol.

You should do it! I want to know what brand of TP you use! :)

acquiresimoleons replied to your photo “Aaron got his wish to grow up, ‘cuz, y’know, it’s not like it’s...”

I never could work out how to make a restaurant run properly either.

The “secret” is to run them with as few employees as possible. Especially at first. Because they will suck out all the money you make and more. So, you either have to have the owner do all the functions (Host(ess), cook, waitstaff) -- which you can do at first because you won’t have a lot of customers until the place levels up to at least Level 3 -- OR you have to use slave labor family members to fill the roles. 

Also, having a limited menu of items that don’t require a lot of cooking skill is necessary, unless/until your cook levels up. Otherwise customers will end up with a lot of burnt meals, which lowers loyalty and makes it harder to get stars and level-ups and all that.

acquiresimoleons replied to your photo “And Owen, Arcadia’s other alien sprog, grew up, too. He looks like a...”

His face kinda scares me ��

It’s the eyes. They’re creepy. But it’s what the PT who spawned him has, so...

sim-boo replied to your photo “Simon being macho… …and, afterwards, not so macho. :) And that’s it...”

R u saying bubble baths arent macho?

Well, anything that a macho man does becomes macho, right? :) But, traditionally? Not so much, no. :)

didilysims replied to your photoset “Simon taught Suzy to roll over….and then cleaned up an ocean of dog...”

Wow, that's more pee than I'd think would fit inside that little dog!

*laugh* Well, it is two dogs’ worth of pee. :) And one of them is a big dog. They just both chose the same pee spot. Right by the front door, of course. *eye roll*

pensblr replied to your photo “Nekkid treadmilling. Saves on laundry.”

*laughs* Just imagine how unfortunate it would be if sims experienced the real life pain of falling on a treadmill...while naked.

I know! I have visions of dangly bits caught in the mechanism, and OW! :) That’s totally a bad kind of ow, too.

mrningbrd replied to your photo “Oh, Benny. Benny, Benny, Benny… Of course, it happened right after...”

tell simon i can relate. this happened the other night at 4 am. my condolences

Oh, God, you poor thing. My dogs at home in Colorado are constantly having skunk encounters lately, apparently. (I’m not there, at the moment, but the ranch hands report in regularly. :) ) It didn’t used to be so bad, but apparently there’s a skunk population explosion in the nearby area...

#esotheria-sims #maybesomethingdunno #nerianasims #penig #holleyberry #plumbobsquareface #immerso-sims #lisac-h #eulaliasims #mustluvcatz-reloaded #acquiresimoleons #sim-boo #didilysims #pensblr #mrningbrd #replies

[pikakeet]

Thoughts on Star Trek Discovery

So, Star Trek Discovery. It’s taken me a while to really come to grips with my feelings on the subject. Like a lot of people I have some problems with it:

The new Klingons. Like most long time Trekkies I can’t really see why they didn’t either go with the first series Klingon design or the Next Generation one. I guess maybe they wanted to make them seem less human, but it was unnecessary IMO and the makeup looks weirdly plastic, at least on an HDTV, and all the Klingons looked alike without recognizable human actors under the latex. As an added bonus, this way they don’t have to cast a lot of Black actors to play Klingon characters on the show. Is it just me or is it weird that they needed to give the Klingons a special reason to be at war with the Federation? I would think a country that was focused on battle and conquering all the planets it came across and another country that was focused on exploration and building colonies on all the uninhabited planets it came across would naturally come into conflict sooner or later. The Holy War aspect made me think that they were trying to make reference to our current conflicts, which could be good or bad depending on how ham-handedly they handle it. But they also could have used a completely new species and we could have had the fun of discovering and exploring a completely new civilization. Or an alternate timeline version of the Bajorans.

Fun fact for those who didn’t know: the reason the Klingons changed so dramatically between ToS and the Motion picture was that when they were making the movie someone in wardrobe grabbed the wrong costumes for the Klingons and nobody caught it until it was too late so they decided to roll with it. The moral of the story: always check your work.

The tech: It looks way too advanced for something that’s a prequel to the original series, but on the other hand tech IRL has advanced a lot from the days when ToS was made. On the other hand... I just can’t like the habit of making display screens on transparent windows. It’s like, who would actually like looking at those? They’d be a total headache to focus on, and I get that maybe the idea is that you’d be able to see what’s happening through the screen while you’re reading it, and that might be useful for some things. But bridge crew display screens? Not really. This isn’t the first point when I’ve felt Star Trek’s technology was going backwards. With TNG we saw the crew go from a control setup that used physical buttons to one that used touch screen panels. The problem with that being that it makes it impossible to use controls by touch. Think about how much faster you are typing on a keypad where you can touch type vs. a virtual keypad on a smartphone and think about that applied to a ship to ship battle. I also had to headdesk during the space walk scene. I know, it looked spectacular, but is it really a good idea to send your crew in a space suit into unexplored asteroid infested irradiated space with nothing but a high tech space suit when you could put them in a shuttle craft and have more radiation shielding?

The Crew:

More specifically the uniforms. It looks like someone either forgot about the uniforms being color coded or thought that was a stupid design decision. The thing is, those uniform colors were actually useful, in ToS between the uniform colors and badge insignia you could tell roughly what division someone was in and what their area of expertise was, as well as their rank. With the new uniforms you can only really tell rank and that’s because commanders have more gold striping and I find myself missing the ability to tell at a glance who’s doing what.

For the most part I didn’t have a problem with the crewmen themselves. But Michael is an exception in a big way. Part of it was that as the formerly non-existent adopted daughter of Sarek and Amanda (Spock’s parents) who was adopted after being the sole survivor of her destroyed colony she tripped too many of my Mary Sue sensors. Part was her name, Michael, I know it’s a habit of that particular writer to give all his female protagonists male names, but IDK I find it distasteful. It’s like “What? Can’t you write a strong female protagonist unless you pretend she’s male on paper?” Part is that I think I’m just over characters with a “dark and troubled past” - that was fine the first time but now it’s everywhere, plus if you’re sending people out on a long deployment, like on a space mission you want them to have all their shit together because the lives of their crew may depend on them being able to keep a cool head at all times. If they’d had the same character but given her no background, with the implication that she had an ordinary boring background, I’d probably like her a lot better.

The storytelling: I’m not really a fan of them going from stand-alone episodes to long form storytelling. Part of that is that it really didn’t work in this case. In this case the first episode was all we got without having to pay extra, in that case it’s particularly important that you bring your A game, and for me that means showing you can tell a good story, including a satisfying ending for your pilot episode. Ending on a cliffhanger is not satisfactory, again it’s one of those storytelling conventions like the “dark and troubled past” that’s been done to death and I’m well use to stories that keep using the cliffhanger to conceal the fact that they’re on a meandering road to nowhere. But part is also that I don’t really think the long form story arc style works for Star Trek. Yes, Star Trek’s been slowly evolving in that direction, but for me the best series were ToS and TNG, before they adopted the story arc style, and even with DS9 and Voyager my interest waned as they went from mainly stand alone episodes to more tightly knit larger story arcs. The way DS9 got bogged down by the Dominion storyline, and Voyager got bogged down with multiseason long conflicts with Delta quadrant species really killed it for me. With ToS and TNG yes there was always an ongoing conflict simmering in the background, but the show wasn’t one long war episode after another either. I guess the truth is war movies bore the shit out of me and always have, so I don’t want to watch a Star Trek that’s just one long war movie set in space. 

I also feel like the fingerprints on this new series, like the ones on the recent movies, show a distinct lack of Trekkie influence. Which is weird to me. I mean can you imagine if Disney set out to make new Star Wars movies and said, “You know what we don’t want in any of these? People who watched and enjoyed the original Star Wars. It’s not like the lore obsessed fanbase is going to notice if we get anything wrong, besides it’s just a swords and sorcery story set in space, what exactly do we need to know?” That would be stupid, and yet it feels like that’s what people are doing whenever they try to produce a new Star Trek.

On a related note I didn’t really like the new opening that much. Now to me again the opening of any series sets the tone for how that series is presenting itself. With the original series the opening was just the Enterprise traveling with Kirk giving the mission statement about exploring new worlds. For me, that was very exciting. By contrast the new opening showcases various Trek gadgets, like it’s saying “look at me, I’m Star Trek!” without really understanding what that means. To me Star Trek isn’t about the gadgets, it’s about exploration, both seeing new sites and new ideas that challenge my current perceptions.

#Star Trek #star trek discovery #sorry for the rant