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1-helluva-hazbin · 6 days

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Growing Pains

Lucifer x Reader

Content warning: fluff, trust building, slow burn, building communication skills, self improvement, fast proofread (please excuse the errors)

Summary: Lucifer's attempt to bond with you, a newer resident of the hotel, spectacularly backfires. Unable to avoid Lucifer, with an impending sinister catalyst, necessitate a resolution forcing you to work through your avoidance tendencies.

Author Notes: This one shot is on the longer side. Let me know if you think I should have made it 2 chapters or if it works as it is. I also wanted to apologize for the day delay! Yesterday did not go as I had planned.

Thank you for all the love and support you choose to give!

Charlie and Vaggie were sitting and talking in the hotel lobby not too far off from you. Vaggie’s one arm, the one you could see, casually draped over the back of the couch. Her thumb stretched from its resting position, lightly caressing her partner as they talked. A minute affection Charlie didn’t seem to notice in her exuberant excitement. One you couldn’t help but focus on, completely ignoring the book you were looking over. You forced your attention back to the book momentarily before Charlie started laughing. The sound ripped your gaze from the pages back over to the loving couple. Charlie’s hand now on Vaggie’s arm.

It made the skin on your arm prickle with goosebumps.

“My, my, my, weren’t you ever taught it’s rude to stare?” The accusation startled you from your fixation and you tilted your head to see Lucifer propped from beside you. One eyebrow skyrocketed nearly to his hairline while the over exaggerated smile on his lips seemed to pull painfully tight on his lips as he attempted to playfully exclaim, “It’s almost like you’re plotting something!”

His quip stung, intentionally or not. You had noticed since arriving his method of interacting with other sinners was usually to tease them about sinner-like things; violence, cannibalism, plotting against other people, their drug use. His favorite against you was that you were plotting a scheme, usually against Charlie. Everyone had been slightly wary of you upon your arrival. Charlie had sworn up and down that it would change. That since you always seemed so aloof and standoffish it was just unnerving for some people in the hotel. Including her dad who was trying, in his own way, to connect with all the sinners when he was around. He had a couple thousand years of prejudice to work through but, he was trying!

She had taken to coaching you at every interaction you had with her. Even Vaggie had jumped on board with her encouragement. If one of them said hello and asked how your day was, a simple ‘fine’ wouldn’t suffice. It didn’t encourage bonding! No, you had to elaborate. Tell them what you did that day. Did you learn anything new? What books are you reading? Share with them things about yourself! Ask how their day was. Reference something they previously told you. Have an actual conversation.

As well intended as they were, it was exhausting. Having gone from almost solitary living for the last century or two -between working in a job where you were almost completely unbothered while living with a single roommate whom you could go days without speaking to- this was a complete 180 and utterly tiring. You didn’t uproot your life to make friends. You had come here to work on redeeming yourself. Get into heaven if it was possible. Which Charlie repeatedly told you included being friendlier, kind, thoughtful, and most importantly selfless. Even if you didn’t necessarily care about everything other people had to say, it was important to still allow them space to be themselves without judgment and make sure they felt heard. That is what would help get you into heaven!

You had noticed as time wore on, begrudgingly so, the tactics she had you practicing had been working. Several of the newer residents had loosened up around you and started conversing with you on a somewhat regular basis. During some of the group exercises where Charlie would tell people to pair up, they had come up to you and suggested you work together. It was just a skill you had let wither that you needed to redevelop. A plant you needed to relocate from shade to sun.

Whatever analogy you needed to tell yourself you did to prevent yourself from giving up. You came here for redemption after all which meant something needed to change and maybe that was part of it. You wouldn’t have been cast to hell if you had gotten things right.

So as Lucifer loitered beside you, you tried to keep in mind you needed to be better and that this was his way of connecting like Charlie had said. Regardless of how it stung hearing it time and time again. This was just practice. More draining practice. “I’m not plotting anything sir.” you said, closing the book in your hands before setting it down to make sure he knew he had your attention. Now what though?

You wracked your mind for what to say next. Charlie said to be honest with people. How do you explain to him why exactly you were staring? That you had started craving physical touch again since coming here. That after having gone years without brushing against anything other than the books you worked with, that having Charlie clasp your hands when she was excited or Angel throwing an completely unwarranted arm over your shoulders when he wanted to use you as a prop for his dramatics, those simple actions had suddenly rekindled your human, well sinner, desire for contact. How pathetic would that make you look? How weak? Then to have been caught fixated on them, desperate to live vicariously momentarily.

“I was just…” you drawled. The idea of telling the truth set your face ablaze in embarrassment. You couldn’t bring yourself to say the truth. You looked over at the couple settling on your answer. “...admiring their relationship.”

He openly laughed, playing along with his original story, “Mmmmhm. If you say so~~.”

A combination of frustration and disappointment washed over you. Completely incinerating any trace of the embarrassment you have felt over the real reason why you had been staring. Hearing him happily hum as he sauntered over to Charlie not believing an ounce of what you said regardless of your lack of ill will towards the princess. If he was only joking, why was it the same barb over and over? Why were you the one he continuously chose to make that specific joke with? It really didn’t feel like a joke anymore.

You looked down at your book trying and failing to speedily process your emotions. You heaved yourself up turning to leave. Not wanting to exist in other people’s presence anymore. Too emotionally taxed.

Wrapped up in your own feelings and thoughts you missed Lucifer glancing back at you. You missed the jarred skip of his step as he caught sight of the haggard expression during your momentary unmasking. You missed the fact he stopped walking all together as you slipped from the room.

You quickly found shelter in the sanctity of your room. Recharging the rest of the evening cocooned in the fuzziest blankets you had, that you made sure always smelled of orange and cinnamon, buried in the book you had just gotten. As the evening slipped into night though, you slipped from your room and made your way down the hall needing a small break from the confines of your quarters before heading to sleep. Because despite your exhaustion, you enjoyed a little fresh air before bed.

Living on the second to top floor had its downsides; like being closer to Alastor’s studio or hiking up the seemingly endless number of stairs. You personally felt it had more perks though. One of the best upsides being a small balcony with a cafe styled table and chairs. Later in the evening when a good number of the residents had either retired to their room for the evening or were still out partying, there was a blissful window of time where there was little risk of running into some else. So you would make your way to the balcony and sit looking out over the city.

Disconnected but present.

You pulled one of the chairs next to the railing so the back of the seat was at a 90 degree angle to the railing. Plopping yourself down, you perched yourself in the seat with both feet up. One arm rested on the railing so as you leaned forward, your belly pressing into your legs, your chin and cheek resting on your arm rather than the cool metal. A few adjustments here and there quickly remedied any qualms your body had with the positioning and finally you were nestled in. The final signal of settling a small decompressing huff.

The usual sights and sounds greeted you. Your eyes scanning for any changes or immediate drama to observe from your box seat above the masses. Angel Dust and Husk walking away from the hotel caught your eye. Angel talking with his whole body as Husk just shook his head in amusement. Angel suddenly buckled over laughing before reaching out to place a hand on Husk’s shoulder to steady himself.

The skin on your shoulder prickled and you involuntarily shiver. You look away from them too little too late. The ache for contact instantaneously tearing at you from the inside. The arm wrapped around yourself tightened in a futile attempt to ease the ache, already knowing from experience it wouldn’t work. You buried your face in your arms contemplating just going back to your room to lose yourself in the book that had occupied your warring mind earlier.

A click sounded from behind you making your head shoot up to see a bashful appearing Lucifer holding the door open. He gave a lopsided grin, gingerly pointing to the second seat, “Do you… mind if I join you?”

You blinked a couple of times, staring at him. Immediately wary of his presence. The lingering silence dragged on, making him shuffle anxiously before you gave permission with a curt nod. You directed your attention back out towards the city despite being hyper aware of him.

A quivering laugh slipped from his lips as he stepped out a little too close for your liking, admittedly the size of the balcony was intended to be intimate, and closed the door behind him as he sat down in the seat across from you. He immediately stretched out, slipping his legs through the railings, putting one elbow on the table between the two of you. “Not a bad view from up here. If you ignore most of the gun shots and ‘fuck you’s’ it can be pretty enjoyable.” He shot a sideways glance over to feel out your reaction at his attempted small talk.

“Yeah it is.”

The city sounds echoed between the two of you. Distant conversations filling the void that the two beings right there were unable, or unwilling, to fill. He nervously laughed, his fingers drumming on the table. You looked over to him this time. Seeing his eyes flittering from object to object unable to choose 1 thing to look at.

Quickly, his drumming fingers started to grate against your already worn nerves and tired mind. Unable to bare whatever this was any further, you attempted to excuse yourself as you started to stand. “It’s late. I’m heading to-”

“No! Wait! Wait!” he sat up from his faux relaxed pose holding out both hands. “Just… hold on.” he breathed out yet another quivering laugh, the panic shining brightly in his eyes as you bore into him with yours.

He took a deep breath. He looked away, mentally giving himself a small pep talk before he looked back. “I wanted to talk. About earlier.”

“I’m tired….” you admit as you stood there looking down at him. His nervous grin and hopeful eyes making your resolve to run buckle. “What about earlier?” you ask, easing back into your seat placing both hands of your clasped on the table.

“Thank you.” he said before beginning to explain. “When you were leaving the lobby,” he specified, making a circle motion with one of his hands, “you looked, well, upset.”

“I looked upset.” you repeated.

He slowly nodded. His next words said slowly and carefully, “I was… wondering if it was something I did? Or said?” he paused before further clarifying, “I wanted you to tell me why.”

You scoffed. Perhaps it was the unroofing of a metaphorical wound his joke had made. Perhaps because you were tired. It could have also been a combination or something completely unrelated. Regardless, you were unable to hold back the venomous sarcasm that slipped from you, “Well I can’t imagine why.” Lucifer’s eyes widened, the reaction only egging you on. “It’s like constantly being judged for something you didn’t and wouldn’t do isn’t upsetting.”

Lucifer stared blankly, “What?”

“Oh you’re plotting against Charlie I see?” your voice lowered in a pathetic attempt to mimic the king. “How many times did you think you’d get away with making the same joke before I realized you clearly meant it? That you’re genuinely suspicious I’m out to hurt Charlie?”

“I didn’t-”

“How many times do I have to tell you I’m not out to get her? I like Charlie! She’s kind! She’s thoughtful! Yeah she’s irritatingly persistent but, she needs to be.”

You had started to dig your nails into your own clasped hands in your flurry of emotions unable to reign them in. You took a breath, realizing you needed to step away from this conversation. You stood up just as Lucifer found his voice. “I never meant for it to be an accusation. It was meant to be a joke.” You felt your emotions spike again, your jaw clenching, as he continued, “I saw you staring at them an-”

“Because I’m TOUCH STARVED!” the words were out of your mouth before you could consider what you were saying, “I saw them giving one another affection and was just so envious! I just stared! I didn’t mean to, I-” You glanced up to him to find a look of confusion, twisting with what you interpreted as disgust, on Lucifer’s face that made your train of thought grind to a halt to reevaluate why his expression was so. Your mind finally processing your admission. “I just…” A hand slowly lifted to lightly cover your mouth, your eyes widening.

“What now?” he asked, the confusion deepening in the expression of his face. A raised eyebrow. A lopsided frown. The slight tilt of his head.

Your face started burning, chest tightening. It instantly became hard to breathe. Panic. You were panicking at the vulnerability you had just bared. Anger melded with embarrassment in the midst of your anxiety. You bristled, launching into an unneeded defense. “You know what, I don’t need to fucking explain myself to you.” You turned, throwing the door to the balcony open, practically running back to your room. Anything he might have said behind you drowned out by your panicked thoughts.

A sleepless night followed. Unable to calm your mind, it ran in circles in your head; justification of your outburst, realizing you completely blew it all out of proportion, getting angry that you had allowed such a vulnerability to air so freely, fear of what Lucifer might do with the information or who he might tell, embarrassment at being so weak, anger at the conversation having happened, before feeling defensive again to repeating the looping train of thought. As the day’s light started to breach the veil of night, only then did you finally slip into unconsciousness utterly spent.

The next few days were spent dodging Lucifer which was relatively easy since you were simultaneously also attempting to fix your wrecked sleep schedule. When you were going to sessions though, you did your best to preemptively vacate any areas when you heard Lucifer approaching or avoided areas you knew he would be in. The change in behavior had mostly been easy to truthfully explain to Charlie as well when you boiled down the scenario into the simplest of terms. You had gotten upset about something and had ended up not sleeping well. While she of course wanted to know the whole situation to help you navigate it in any way she could, she was respectful, admittedly a little pouty, when you said it was something you weren’t ready to talk about. Not having to lie to her made you feel a little better since you missed quite a few of her group exercises.

While many of the residents didn’t care or hadn’t found the change to be too out of place, when paired with your explanation, it didn’t slip the careful eye of Alastor. The first day it had seemed to catch his attention but, by the second day he had taken a keen interest in your antics. When you would try to slip out before Lucifer would come into a room, he would stop you to talk about your participation in the session. Once he told you Charlie wanted to speak with you and then took you into a room where Lucifer and Charlie were talking, only for him to have misheard Charlie’s request. While he framed his actions as innocent and well intended, you had never seen the grin on Alastor’s face as wide as it was. It was unnerving.

By the fourth day, you weren’t just paranoid about running into Lucifer. Alastor’s newest hobby had seemed to become tormenting you and his questions and conversations had become probing. Feeling out cracks in your story. At one point he had even told you he was all ears for any issues you might have with other residents or guests.

Having lived through his rise to power, you knew there was no good to come from exposing yourself to such a machiavellian individual. You wouldn’t put it past him to worm a deal out of anyone, even as lowly you. An expendable pawn was still a piece to play and he was one to look at the bigger picture.

At that point, you garnered enough gumption to face Lucifer. You couldn’t risk getting caught under Alastor’s thumb and the idea of him knowing you were touch starved and how that could be held against you igniting a spike of anxiety. You knew Lucifer and Alastor were not on good terms but, the idea of word getting to Alastor was distressing. You loathed the idea of facing Lucifer but you needed to ensure your blunder remained under wraps. This was for self preservation at this point.

Towards the end of the day, you sequestered yourself to your room to prepare; plan key points you wanted to discuss, how you wanted to phrase things, etc. You knew you couldn't lose your head again, considering how the prior incend had led to the current circumstances. After an hour or so though, you felt ready.

You made your way to the top floor, taking extra precautions to avoid running into Alastor potentially heading to his studio. Once certain Alastor was not loitering about or following you, you made your way down the hallway towards Lucifer's room. You focused on your breathing as you trekked the hall. Attempting to quell your anxiety and slow your racing heart, to no avail. By the time you reached his door, your pulse was thrumming in your ears and you were certain he would be able to hear it too.

You stood before his door paralyzed. Both hands clenched at your side. Unable to stop the tremble that plagued them. Your eyes locked onto the perfect white presetine door as if trying to bore holes through it. Your breathing uneven. All the words you had practiced having evaporated from your head as you made your way there.

This was a mistake.

You pivot. Hurriedly, retreating.

Halfway back towards the stairs your eyes register Alastor's studio door and the terror that drove you to the point resurface. You halted. Your hands flew to your head in a silent temper tantrum as your mind raced to determine what would be the lesser evil. A sense of urgency gnawing at you considering you were standing dead center in the hallway of a barren floor.

What was worse; not knowing if Lucifer might reveal what you had said, accidentally or intentionally, with everyone including Alastor potentially finding out or turning around and confronting Lucifer?

The first concern was all just a possibility though wasn't it? There was no guarantee that it would happen. Talking to Lucifer wouldn't guarantee that he wouldn't spill your secret either. You let out a soft, maniacal sounding laugh as you took a step forward only to stop again. A possibility that would weigh on you for weeks to months leading to you lurking around the hotel, as you had been, haunting the place. Harrowed by the uncertainty at every turn.

"FFFUuuuucccckkk..." you groaned softly. Your palms sliding down your forehead pressing into your eyes. You needed to confront Lucifer. The realization making your stomach churn. You couldn't continue dodging him and you couldn't outrun the fear. You turned resting your back against the wall, your hands on your knees as you bent over mentally recollecting yourself. You went through what you had gone over before in your room. Reminding yourself of the key points.

You sighed and brought your palms to your eyes again. Slowly breathed out. Pulling your hands from your eyes, you launched off the wall propelling you back towards Lucifer's room. The momentum only lasting a few steps before freezing again.

"Heeeey, as entertaining as this pantomiming is, and it's a great performance, I would appreciate getting access to my room sometime tonight."

Your face blanched as a shiver slipped down your spine. You slowly turned to see Lucifer standing behind you. Both hands perched on the apple of his cane and a practiced smile on his lips. One eyebrow raised, almost lost beneath the rim of his hat, as he watched you tentatively turn towards him.

Instantly you straightened yourself and stepped aside. "Good evening." your voice was dry and hoarse.

"Yup. Good evening." he chirped back, unmoving. Your eyes were locked onto a spot on the floor, your mind utterly blank. As the seconds drew on, his smile tensed as he nervously waited for you to do...something? His fingers drummed on his cane. "Well... if the performance is over I'll be heading to my room. Have a good night!" He looked away awkwardly and started on his way.

A quick glance at his back got the gears in your brain working. What were you doing? He was right there. You were screwing it up. "Wait...wait! Lucifer…" It was soft, but loud enough for him to hear. He slowed and turned looking back.

"I..." Your eyes meeting made you want to run. The idea of having this conversation replusing you. You pushed off the wall and walked over towards him, fighting the urge to flee. "Are you free? I-...I would like to apologize and talk. About the other day?" Your face felt flushed.

Lucifer shuffled and gently smiled which was unnerving. It was a smile you had only ever seen reserved for Charlie and Vaggie. "Don't you think it's rather late? It would be a little unproductive if we had a repeat of last time."

The comment struck a nerve considering it was earlier in the day than when he had approached you. It must have shown on your face as his smile dropped paired with your response. "That's fine. We can talk tomorrow."

"Unless, you're not tired?" he asked, putting his nervous smile back on and laughing anxiously, "We could have a cup of tea this time. Chamomile perhaps?"

You hesitated but, then nodded. "That would be nice."

He nodded, as he started towards his room onto the spin around. "Ah! You're comfortable talking in my room right? I wouldn't want to make an assumption! We could certainly talk on the balcony again if you prefer!"

"Uh, somewhere private is preferred so your room is fine." You respond bluntly, his nervous energy deflating. He nodded once more, his grip on his cane as tight as a vice.

The two of you made your way to his room; him leading with you trailing after. His room was surprisingly clean though you couldn't help but notice a small work area over to the left of the door with two piles of perhaps 50 or so rubber ducks. He had noticed your gaze and eagerly redirected you over towards the windows where he had a little cushioned bench seat perched below. As you settled into the seat, Lucifer got two tea cups ready with a snap of his fingers.

He carried them over to you with practiced care and gingerly handed one off to you before he sat down as well. You took the cup, admiring the beautiful and intricate abstract design on it, before lightly blowing on it and taking a sip.

"Sooooo..." he drawled, having quickly taken a sip from his cup as well, "before you start, there is something I wanted to bring up if that's alright." Your eyes flick to his, his expression a mask utilizing his usual smile. You nod, making sure he saw before he proceeded,"I need you to explain to me what you meant by 'touch staved'."

You gawked at him. You hadn’t heard what you thought you just heard. “What?”

Lucifer blinked before looking a little frantic and blurting out, “I know what it means! Of course I know what it means. I’m the king of hell. I’m not so wildly out of touch that I don’t!” he laughed looking out the window before taking a sip of his tea, “I’ve also heard it can mean different things to different people. So I want to know what it means. To you! I want to know what it means to you.”

He finally looked back to you taking another sip of his tea, already halfway through his small porcelain cup. Meanwhile, you felt like you were short circuiting sitting across from him. Not only had you spent the last few days fretting and dodging the angel, worrying that he would tell people what you said, but now he was asking you to spell it out for him. Was he….messing with you? You studied him before he gave you a toothy grin coyly purred out, “So?”

It didn’t seem like he was messing with you. Something like this was more Angel Dust’s style of teasing. You mimic Lucifer by taking a sip of your tea for a slight delay. You carefully set the teacup down on the windowsill next to you and place your hands in your lap. “I need you to promise me you’ll never tell anyone.”

“And why would I do that?” He asked. He was messing with you now though you were in no mood for it.

You narrowed your eyes at him and stated as matter of factly as you could despite wanting to spit venom defensively, “I’m not untouchable like you. We’re in HELL. Anything and everything can be used against you by the wrong people. I can’t end up having someone use anything I say here against me.”

His facade softened and his smile dropped into a frown. He brought the teacup up to his lips and muttered something into the chamomile. “No one is untouchable…”

You heard him say something but, hadn't been able to make it out so you remained quiet.

“I promise to never tell another soul.” he finally sighed.

“On Charlie’s life?” you asked, knowing he could still share what was said as there was no magic binding him. You needed to know just how serious he was though and Charlie was usually a good indicator. His eyes flashed red and they narrowed at you. You held firm, keeping eye contact and straightening your spine.

“On my life. No reason to bring Charlie into this.” he leaned back, his eyes fading back to their normal golden hue.

You hesitated to accept but relented with a nod. Knowing you had to accept the compromise he offered but, you did feel satisfied that he wouldn’t share what was said. You started thinking about where to begin. As you contemplated, you felt your face heat in embarrassment. He watched, patiently biding his time as he lightly tapped the rim of his teacup with a claw topping it off with more tea.

“For me…” you looked him, locking eyes. The embarrassment clawing through you. The intensity making you panic. Your eyes darted away. Finding a spot on the floor to stare at again so you could think with even a fraction more clarity. “For me it means I… I …miss…touch.”

You glanced up to him, to see the sight raise of an eyebrow. Your mind started churning with worst case scenarios and suddenly your face burned hotter. You looked away again.

“Not sexual!” The words spit out, not wanting any uncomfortable undertones to the conversation. “It’s just… simple touch. Like hugging. Lightly having someone put their hand on my shoulder. Even just bumping into people. Any sort of skin contact makes me want more and afterwards that’s all I want. It takes days for that to calm down and since being here… that’s usually around the time something else happens. It’s a never ending cycle.”

He listened, his face remaining neutral as you spoke and he remained silent for a beat after you finished. You rubbed your arm. Between talking about the topic and your nerves, there was a compulsion to do something with your hands. He broke the silence, “The other day when we had our…falling out, you had been watching Charlie and Vaggie because you saw them touching one another? That is why you mentioned being envious?”

You nodded, closing your eyes as you took a breath in an attempt to calm yourself.

He smiled. His fingers rubbing the edge of his teacup as he gazed into it. He knew those feelings all too well. “That…makes sense.” You open your eyes to look at him, noticing the look on his face. He noticed your movement and looked up to you, giving a lopsided smile.

Lilith had been absent for 7 years.

Your eyes widened at the possibility and dared to pose the question, “You too?”

Lucifer stiffened a moment, took a breath and nodded. “Yes. Even I have those days.”

He took a sip of his tea and looked out the window. You picked yours back up and mimicked his action.

“I’m sorry…” you said after a few minutes of what you felt was relatively comfortable silence. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you the other day. It wasn’t fair. I was tired and already feeling…exposed? Hmm…sensitive is probably a better word…”

“Regardless, I knew I was tired. I should have asked to shelve the conversation once I realized it wasn’t something I couldn’t handle right then and there. I’m also sorry for not actually hearing you out once you started since I didn’t ask to stop. I’d like to try discussing it again if you’re willing.”

You spoke while looking out the window. Seeing him shift his attention to you from your peripherals you keep your eyes trained to elsewhere. After you finished, you turned slightly to look at him from the corner of your eye.

The conversation that followed supplied far better results than the last. He clarified how all of his barbs had been an attempt to be playful since he didn’t know you well but, understood how hearing it over and over had manifested as a passive aggressive accusation on your end. You apologized for having taken it that way and not properly addressed the issue before it started to fester as anger. The compromising being he wouldl stop trying to interact with you in that way with the caveat being if he slipped up or tried something new that you didn’t appreciate, you would address it before resentment could build.

At the end, the both of you sat on the bench sipping the last of your tea looking out at the city. At some point, Lucifer had opened one of the windows. A light caress of warm wind slipped in scattering goosebumps up your arms despite it not being cold and you brought a hand up to rub them, hoping they rescinded quickly.

Lucifer’s eyes slid to the motion. “So how long has it been since you had, I guess, consistent contact with someone?”

You blinked, thinking about it. “A couple decades.”

“Decades?” he gasped out. He realized just how loud he had been and he coughed with a smile to cover up his reaction. “I mean. Decades. That’s… awhile.”

“Yeah, well…” uncertain on if he was genuinely surprised at the length of time or found it underwhelming and was being sarcastic, you weren’t entirely sure what to make of his reaction. “Most sinners don’t bother with libraries. The hellborn who do, don’t want to interact with a sinner and avoided me, opting for one of the other hellborns working. So I got left alone most of the time.”

You shrugged your shoulders and turned your attention back out the window. Thinking about it now, it hadn’t bothered you then. You suppose you might have just been ignoring that downside though. It had always been easy to check yourself out emotionally and just get through what needed to be done. Not contemplating what you wanted or what could be. Only focused on what was.

“Has…” you start and then stop, wondering if you should ask. You glance over to him seeing he hadn’t redirected his attention to you. “How long has it been for you?”

“Consistently?” he asked as he pondered the question he had posed to you. “A decade? Maybe a little longer. Lilith and I…” his eyes roamed down to his ring. “We had more downs than ups well before she left but I still got some affection in between when we had a good stretch.

A sad tone had seeped into his voice. He gently rubbed the ring with his middle finger, a sense of melancholy filling the room. You watched. Never having had an extended relationship with someone before, you couldn't pretend to imagine the feelings that lingered. You took a breath and then scooted over on the bench seat pulling him from his thoughts. You extended an open hand to him. He stared. He hesitated before slowly reaching out, his decision wavering for a split second before he placed his hand in yours.

You gently took hold of his hand and looked back out the window. He was far warmer than you had expected him to be. His skin soft. You sighed softly feeling far less unsettled by the sensation than you had thought, regardless of how intimate the action could be seen. It was mindless for you as your thumb began to lightly caress the back of his hand. Lucifer fidgeted next to you, though he didn’t retract his hand.

You weren’t sure how long the two of you sat there. The sounds of the city echoing off the walls of his room with hell’s consistent warm breeze enveloping the two of you in wave after wave. Each of you basking in the warmth of the other, no matter how little it was. It wasn’t until you noticed Lucifer starting to nod off that you smiled and squeezed his hand.

His eyes fluttered open to find you looking at him with a bemused smile. The softest you had looked at him to date. “You’re tired.”

“I’m not.” he mumbled, a well timed yawn slipping from his lips. You raised a brow with his response being a ‘tsk’ noise.

You slowly, reluctantly, pull your hand from his before pushing yourself to a stand. A stretch had a few of your joints popping. “Would be an awful idea to fall asleep like that.”

He stood next to you with a noncommittal hum. As you reached for your cup and saucer, a snap of his fingers dispensed of both his and yours. You nod at him before you look over towards the door and then back to him. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. That kind of magic is thoughtless to me.” he said, misinterpreting your meaning.

“I meant for talking things over and spending your evening with me.”

He burbled out a laugh. “Oh well don’t mention that either. Literally. Don’t mention this to anyone. I have a reputation to uphold. King of hell and all.” he grinned at you with his characteristic saccharine smile.

“An exchange of secrets then?” You asked, entertaining a little bit of his playfulness.

“Ah, still worried about me spilling the beans?” he asked, walking you to the door. “An exchange then. I won’t share yours if you don’t share mine.”

“Deal.” The response was quick and sharp. He opened the door and you stepped through the threshold, pausing and turning around. “Thank you again. I… enjoyed this. Most of this anyway.”

“My pleasure.” his hand did several circle motions as he performed a mock half bow.

You rolled your eyes at his dramatics. “Goodnight Lucifer.” you say beginning to head off before you add, “Let me know if you would like to do something like this again. A tea time or something. I’ll make sure to keep it drama free.”

He grinned leaning against his door frame. “I’d enjoy that.”

#lucifer morningstar #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #lucifer magne #lucifer morningstar x you #lucifer x reader #my writing #hazbin hotel lucifer x reader #Growing Pains #slow burn #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel x y/n #fanfiction #fanfic #1-helluva-hazbin #writing

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whereianonymouslypostfics · 3 months

Text

Growing Pains Part 3

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x reader

Word count: ~12k

Summary: Little Nat is almost 13 and school’s a bitch. Retired mob boss turned stay-at-home mom Wanda has to figure out how to deal with bullies at her daughter’s school.

A/N: Credit to @rianncreates for this fic idea. Enjoy 😘

Warnings: Fluff, teen angst, injury, reference to previous injury/trauma, bullies, and mentions medicinal drug use

When Wanda wakes up in the morning, she can immediately tell that you’d left bed for a while at some point during the night. The faint smell of marijuana wasn’t one that she particularly liked, but she’d certainly gotten used to it over the years. She hated whenever you smoked because nowadays you only did it if you were in a lot of pain. She almost misses the days when you would just kickback, relax and smoke a little or too much with Yelena. The stress she’d felt then at seeing you high was less traumatizing than having to see you in pain.

You stir a little after she does and you sigh as you realize that you’re still very tired. Luckily you get to relax all day today and if you got your way, you wouldn’t have to leave the house at all. When you open your eyes, you smile at the sight of your wife with her beautifully mussed hair and sleepy eyes.

“Morning, Wands. Did you sleep well?”

Wanda smiles as she leans in to kiss you, and you hold her close as you try to force yourself awake. You’re still groggy when Wanda speaks up, and she runs a hand through your messy hair smiling as you grumble a bit.

“I did. What about you? Are you feeling better?”

You nod immediately because your cold trip outside to smoke for a bit had helped a lot. You’d taken Boone with you because you’d practically tripped over him on the way upstairs and he’d wanted to be near you. Wanda smiles at the fact that you had your dog outside with you at 2 in the morning. She sighs as she flops onto her back with a frown. You notice immediately and sneak a hand out to squeeze her side. You stifle a laugh as she jumps in surprise and shoots you a glare.

“What’s on your mind, love?”

You hadn’t realized that Wanda was thinking about last night too, and you quickly tune in to the conversation as you consider what is going on with your daughter.

“Did Pietro tell you what he and Natalya talked about last night?”

Wanda’s fidgeting and playing with the hem of her shirt as she thinks about what her brother had said. He was being a good uncle. What could that mean? Yelena had already said that Natalya had asked for advice but they’d been given no other hints. She frowns when you shake your head before relaying the very vague explanation that your brother-in-law had given you.

“He said that she had ‘girl trouble’ and that he gave her advice. Whatever that means."

Wanda frowns at all of the things this could entail and she forces herself to sit up with a sigh. She half-heartedly fixes her hair as she shakes her head. She shoots you a look that you can’t help but laugh at, and you push yourself up into a seated position before glancing at the clock.

“That’s terrifying to think about.”

You don’t really know what to say because even when you went upstairs to think about it you couldn’t figure out what was wrong. The only real hint you had was the question that Natalya had asked Wanda the other day. Maybe she was lonely and she wanted to figure out how to fix it. You really had nothing and you smile slightly as you lean against your wife with a shrug.

“At least she also went to Yelena.”

You think about your options and you realize that you’re just going to have to leave it be for now. You need to trust Yelena and Pietro, as well as your daughter to handle everything.

“I think we just need to see what happens. Asking her about it will only stress her out and keep her from going to them again.”

Wanda’s still frowning. She realizes that you’re right and that she’s going to have to leave this in the trio’s hands. She’s still trying to convince herself that she shouldn’t feel hurt by this. She was glad that Natalya was comfortable going to her uncles and aunts. She just wishes that she could be that person for her daughter.

“That’s also terrifying to me.”

Natalya is downstairs making a breakfast of heated leftovers when her parents emerge from their room. They all usually sleep in on Sundays, but Nat had woken up early and couldn’t go back to sleep. She’d hung out with Boone and Fletcher for a while before letting the former out and heading to the kitchen. There were plenty of leftovers to eat and since there was more than enough for lunch, dinner, and breakfast, Nat eats some cheesecake and some chicken before she hears her parents’ door open upstairs. She hurries to put the cheesecake back into the fridge, but her moms knew her too well.

“Don’t bother, Little Nat, I’m going to eat some of it too.”

“Please tell me you’re going to eat something else too.”

You’re not even sure who Wanda’s talking to, but you nod anyway before smiling as you greet your daughter in the kitchen. You hug the brunette and plant a kiss on the top of her head before you glance around the kitchen to see if any food was left out. You’re thinking of what you’ll eat for breakfast when Wanda comes up for her hug.

“How did you sleep, milaya?”

You release Nat as you walk to the coffee machine to get your wife caffeinated as quickly as possible. You’re more concerned about what you’ll eat, but you keep an ear open for what your daughter says. You’re grabbing some leftovers with a loaf of bread on top for your wife’s usual toast. Nat’s yawning as she hugs her redheaded mom before pulling away quickly. She shakes out her hand with a scowl as she berates herself for continuing to forget that she’s hurt.

“Ow, I slept well. I just woke up hungry.”

You laugh at this as Wanda rolls her eyes because of course her daughter is hungry. It’s hard to find a time when she’s not hungry, and it actually was a very good indicator when she was younger that something was wrong. It still applied most days.

After grabbing everything you’ll eat for breakfast you leave briefly to go walk the dogs. Rogue and Boone were sitting at your feet and begging with their sad eyes to eat. You let them out for a minute on their own as you fill their bowls and grab their meds. You hurry through your routine of hiding them in wet food before placing them in the designated bowls. Rogue comes in first as usual and he tries to stick his head in his brother’s bowl. You redirect his attention to the other one before looking over your shoulder as Boone comes running inside.

“It’s okay bud. I kept him from eating your breakfast. You’re welcome.”

Wanda can’t help but smile as you have a conversation with your dog before joining them for breakfast. Nat’s already sitting at the table when Wanda sets down her plate and glances at you curiously. She’d already made sure you took your meds this morning, and as she watches you pile food onto your plate, she can’t help but smile.

“All good over there, detka?”

You nod before running over to the table and setting your mostly milk coffee down. You kiss your wife’s cheek before rounding the table to kiss Nat’s too. You know that you both decided not to ask Natalya about what she told Piet and Yelena last night, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t encourage her to mention it.

“Did you have fun last night, kid?”

Natalya is already smiling as she takes a bite of her breakfast with an enthusiastic nod. She waits until she’s done chewing to offer a verbal response, but you’re patient as you run back to the kitchen for your food. Once you sit down beside your wife you are immediately flanked by both of your dogs who are looking for a second meal. You pat both of them on the head before turning your attention to Natalya.

“Yeah! It was great. I loved the food, and Bucky’s present is so cool!”

You stop short of taking another bite when you realize that you’d forgotten about Bucky’s unconventional gift. One glance at your wife tells you that she did too, and now you’re both wondering if she’d taken it upstairs with her. Wanda frowns as she sets down her coffee and tries to figure out where the very large knife that their friend had given Natalya was.

“Where is it, Natalya? I didn’t get a chance to look at it. “

Little Nat is up and running upstairs to grab it before you can even roll your eyes at your wife’s less-than-subtle question. You just watch your daughter disappear before you turn to Wanda with a smile. She shoots you a look that you just shake your head at before continuing to eat your breakfast.

“I didn’t say anything.”

Wanda doesn’t have time to respond before Nat is returning to the table. She luckily stops before running into the table, and she sets the large knife down carefully beside her mom’s plate. You watch as Wanda picks it up and looks it over carefully. She’s less interested in the design and she’s paying more attention to the fact that Bucky seemed to be right. She tugs on the handle and tries to free the knife, but with no success. Natalya’s gone back to her breakfast at this point, but she glances up to see her mom struggling and she shakes her head.

“I tried for a while, Mama it’s not coming out.”

Wanda frowns at this before handing it across the table to you. You sigh as you take the weapon and look it over with a frown. You still can’t believe that Bucky gave this to your daughter. You only try to get the knife out for a few seconds before you shake your head. You hand it back to Natalya but as she goes to blindly grab it you hold it back until you have your daughter’s attention. Nat looks up and you shoot her a serious look.

“You can keep this for now, but if you get it to open you have to give it back to Bucky.”

You turn to Wanda to make sure she’s okay with this plan, but when she just sighs you figure she has no objections. Nat takes the knife back with a smile before taking the last bite of her food.

“Thanks! Do we have any plans for today?”

Despite not sleeping well last night, you’d been on board for Natalya’s idea to spend some time outside. She wanted to walk the dogs up the mountain and regardless of the fact that exercise is not something you want to do today, you suck it up. You and Wanda get changed before heading outside to meet Natalya where she’s sitting outside on the deck waiting for them. Boone and Rogue were wandering around with their tails wagging excited to be going on a walk. Despite being older, they still loved hiking and could go for a few miles before getting too tired. They moved slower, but you did too so you didn’t mind at all. You smile as you greet your daughter and then dogs before turning to your wife.

“Alright, ready to set out?”

Natalya smiles before nodding happily and grabbing Boone and Rogue’s leashes. You don’t usually keep them on leashes when you go out, but you let Nat do what she wants. You figure she’ll let them go off leash a little later. You grab your walking stick from Wanda before you usher her off of the deck with a cheeky smile.

“After you, milady.”

Wanda rolls her eyes but she steps down from the deck before taking your free hand with a sigh. She hopes that Natalya doesn’t want to go too far because she has a date with you and the couch later and maybe her cat. She’d wanted to be lazy today, but she does enjoy seeing how Natalya happily leads her dogs up the path.

“Boone slow down!”

You consider taking one of the dogs from your daughter, but she seems to be having fun trying to keep the duo on the path and walking side by side. You hold Wanda’s hand as you two walk behind your children watching them carefully, but letting them get a ways ahead of you. You turn to your wife as you think about what tomorrow will bring.

“I should be able to leave work early tomorrow so I can drive with you to Nat’s game.”

Wanda smiles at the reminder that her daughter had her first game of the season tomorrow. The two of you had talked to Natalya about her interest in sports early on when she started middle school. Rather you’d had to encourage her to give them a try. She had been very against doing anything that involved other people. She wouldn’t join any clubs, and you and Wanda were worried that she wouldn’t have any friends. When she finally agreed to try and play basketball it only lasted for a week, but she made two friends in that time. Natalya was still friends with both of them, and they were the ones to convince her to try out for softball which went a lot better than basketball. She was a little too inattentive to play such a fast-paced game.

“Okay, just let me know if you’re running late.”

One perk of being an administrator/vet was getting to choose your own schedule to accommodate your daughter’s schedule. You usually worked longer days on Tuesdays and Thursdays so you were free for game nights. You and Wanda made it to every game, and depending on what your friends were up to they’d come along too. Natalya pretended to be embarrassed when her aunts and uncles all showed up and cheered for her along with her parents, but you knew that she secretly appreciated it. She also loved it when Boone and Rogue could come, even if most of the time they sat in the grass and were pet by small children. The last game of the previous season, everyone had come out and Pietro had been so into it that you’d filmed him to show Nat later.

“Pietro will be there, but I don’t know about anyone else. He’ll probably meet us there.”

You nod as you step over some rocks in your path with a huff. So much for staying on the path. You’re glad you brought your stick because it helps with your balance, but it can be a pain to carry. You make sure that Nat and the dogs aren’t too far ahead before you turn back to Wanda with a questioning look.

“Sooo… has she told you what she wants for her birthday yet?”

Nat forces herself to slow down a little bit and she lets Boone and Rogue walk ahead of her. She always forgets how much her dogs like being outside and in the woods. They stop briefly to sniff something and Nat takes a deep breath before looking around curiously. They’ve strayed from the path a bit, and she winces at the fact that she hadn’t even noticed. She’ll get them back on track once the dogs get their noses out of…what was that?

“Guys, come on, what’s so interesting?”

Nat pulls the shepherds back a bit and her nose scrunches up in disgust at the sight of a giant pile of shit. She mutters under her breath before leading the dogs back to the path with a smile. She stops to pet both of them for a bit until she hears her parents’ footsteps behind her.

“Is it okay to let them off leash?”

You smile as you nod and wave the two dogs to run ahead. They both look to you once they’re freed as if asking for permission and you just wave them off again with a sigh.

“Yes, you can go. Be free, but be good!”

The two dogs run off side by side and you smile at the sight of how adorable they look. They’re running so close to each other that they look like one large furry blob with too many legs. They’ve really come a long way from what they were when they first met each other. You’re so glad that they managed to grow close, and over the years you’ve seen them take care of each other in ways that bring you to tears. You don’t realize you’ve spaced out until you feel someone tug on your hand. You look up to see Natalya smiling at you, and you nod in response before letting her lead you.

“Ready, Mom?”

The next twenty minutes or so pass quickly as Natalya chats with you and Wanda about how school is going and her friends. She talks a little bit about softball and what she expects Monday to go like. You’re glad that Natalya has liked the sport more than you both thought she would. Honestly, she was just super competitive and liked the idea of being on a team with her friends more than the actual sport, but still. You were glad that she’d found something that she enjoyed.

“Moms can Taylor and Alyssa maybe come over after the game? For victory pizza?”

You smile widely at this while Wanda sighs in defeat. This was a tradition you’d started with your daughter when she first started playing sports. It was mostly to encourage her to put in effort, and just as it did for you, food was your daughter’s greatest motivator. You’re already nodding at this and you look to Wanda to see that she’s shooting you a look that just makes you laugh. You know that you’re a bad influence, but luckily this is just a seasonal thing, and your daughter eats healthily otherwise. If anything, she’ll get pizza with some sort of vegetable on it.

“That’s a great idea. Now you just have to make sure you win.”

Nat’s about to feign offense and insist that they will definitely beat the team they’re playing tomorrow, but the sight of the dogs running toward them stops her in her tracks. She’s frowning because they usually don’t run home, they usually drag their feet because they’re tired or they don’t want to leave. This is odd. You seem to think so too and you stop in your tracks with a frown before you look between your two dogs curiously.

“What is it you two? Tired already?”

Boone’s whining and Rogue is already trying to herd you back the way you came, and you’re not sure what to make of this. You look out to where they came from and don’t see anything suspicious, but you didn’t really expect to. Wanda is trying to push Rogue away from her, but he keeps rubbing his head on her legs trying to push her back down the path.

“Rogue, stop it.”

When he barks at her you realize that something is up. He only ever barks to get attention and you decide that it might be best to listen to him this time. You realize you don’t have to convince your wife because she’s on the same page as you. She’s shooting her dog a confused look, and when she reaches out to pet him, he mouths at her hand. She pulls her hand back quickly and shoots him a glare but he just whines as he starts to head back the way they came.

“Ow, fine we’ll go. Come on let’s go.”

Wanda turns back to wave you and Natalya with her, but she stops short when she sees that you’ve walked away from them up the path. She opens her mouth to shout for you, but she doesn’t get a chance before you’re turning around and walking back down the hill and reaching out for both her and Natalya. You look mostly calm, but Wanda can tell from your wide eyes that you’re worried.

“Okay, okay. You’re right let’s go. Quickly.”

Wanda frowns but doesn’t hesitate to follow you and Rogue as she grabs Natalya’s hand. She’s a little confused and she speaks up before Wanda gets a chance.

“Wait, why? What’s going on?”

You look behind you before reaching out to pet both of your dogs as they continue on the trail occasionally looking back to make sure you’re following. You then put an arm around your daughter’s shoulders and then one around your wife’s waist before whispering under your breath.

“The dogs wanted to let us know that there is a mama bear with her babies over that hill.”

Wanda’s eyes widen in surprise and she turns to make sure they’re not being followed. Luckily all she sees is green trees, dirt and rocks. No animals in sight. She picks up her pace a little though and you smile before looking to Natalya who’s smiling in awe.

“That’s so adorable!”

Despite thinking this, she knows what her mom is going to say. It’s a good thing that the dogs were with them because stumbling on a family of bears could be a dangerous situation. You’re not sure that your knife hidden in your walking stick would be enough to prevail.

“It is, but we stay very, very far away from them, right Little Nat?”

Your daughter is already nodding as she runs ahead toward her very good dogs with a wide smile. She scratches both of them and kisses their slightly sweaty heads as she praises them for their smarts.

“Yes! You two knew that too, huh? Such smart boys!”

You can’t help but smile proudly and Wanda links her arm with yours as you both watch your children walk ahead of you. Your mind wanders to the other fur child at home and you scoff before muttering under your breath.

“Fletcher would have led us right to them, I’m sure.”

You laugh when your wife turns to shoot you an offended look, but she really can’t argue with you. In her old age, Fletcher has gotten even less tolerable of disturbances in her daily routine. She napped, groomed herself, ate, and chased the balls of dog fur that she found on the floor. She had a pretty good system and the idea of her going outside at all made you laugh. You’re sure that she was too lazy to go far at all. One time Nat was young and accidentally left the door opened, and Fletcher had escaped and immediately run up a tree. You found out later when feathers floated down to the ground, that she’d just gone up there to catch a poor bird.

“Oh hush.”

You and your family arrive home without further incident and you quickly lie down on the couch in the living room with a dramatic sigh. You are going to stay here for a little bit and you ignore the hustle and bustle around you of the dogs getting resituated after a quick drink and a treat from Natalya. You feel someone jump on your stomach and you know without looking that it’s Fletcher saying hello. She digs her claws in you right as you open your eyes and you glare at her before promptly lifting her off of you.

“Ow! Fletcher you little –grrr.”

You shake Fletcher in the air for a bit until she starts to try and get away. You wonder if she’d still land on her feet if you threw her, not that you ever would, but that thought is quickly cut short by her being snatched from you.

“Y/n, don’t be mean to her! Poor baby.”

You aren’t surprised in the least to see your wife standing over you cuddling her cat in her arms. Fletcher’s such a ham and she stretches out all of her legs before rubbing her face on Wanda’s chin. You roll your eyes before sitting up and looking around to see where your daughter is. She’s unsurprisingly in the kitchen getting a snack so you speak in a hushed whisper that only Wanda and her cat can hear.

“She’s full of it. She clawed me that little shit.”

Wanda shoots you a look that you just wave off before you lie back down and reach for the remote. You let your wife fuss over her cat while you find something to watch on TV. You’re not really in the mood for anything dramatic, you just want white noise as you rest for a bit. You yawn as you drop the remote back on the table and get curled up on the couch with a groan.

“Tired?”

You shake your head despite snuggling further into the couch and hugging a pillow with your eyes closed.

“No, I’m good. I’m good. I was just going to stretch out here for a bit.”

Wanda just nods thoughtfully at you, not that you notice, before she sets Fletcher down and looks over to her daughter in the kitchen. It’s about lunch time and Nat’s gotten an early start, but Wanda’s not hungry yet and she’d like to lie down too. She eyes you where you’re sprawled out on the couch and instead of getting possibly elbowed or kicked off, Wanda decides not to surprise you.

“Can I join you?”

Your eyes open immediately and you’re smiling as you hold your arms out for her. Wanda grabs your hands before crawling on top of the couch carefully so she doesn’t squish you. Not that you seem to mind because you wrap your arms around her waist and pull her down so she falls on top of you. She yelps and you laugh as Natalya looks over her shoulder at you two and she just rolls her eyes before turning back to her food. You and Wanda finally get settled and neither of you bother with the TV as you lie on your back with your wife cuddled up beside you.

“Comfy?”

Natalya’s question is answered with a hum from you and a nod from Wanda who opens her eyes to confirm that her daughter is standing over her. She watches her put her food down on the coffee table before grabbing her phone, but she doesn’t realize she’s taking a picture until it’s too late to stop her.

“Natalya, don’t. No pictures.”

This makes you open your eyes and you see that Little Nat is indeed taking pictures of you, and you scowl before turning to hide your face in your pillow.

“Noo, Little Nat listen to your mom.”

“Aw come on! You look so cute! I won’t send it to Uncle Pietro.”

Wanda shoots her daughter a look that makes her laugh but she still nods in confirmation because she doesn’t want to get in trouble. She wouldn’t do something that dumb.

“Don’t you dare.”

Natalya just grabs the remote and sits at the end of the couch so she can still be nearby her mothers but not in their way. She grabs her food and starts to look for something to watch. She’s pretty sure her moms are going to sleep soon, and she might as well after lunch, but for now she’d like some background noise. Maybe she’ll watch a Disney movie.

An hour later, her parents are asleep as she suspected, and she’s still snacking as she watches a Disney movie she’s seen 70 times at least. She is watching her favorite song scene when her phone vibrates on the coffee table. She hurries to grab it so it doesn’t wake up her parents, but they are too relaxed to notice or care. You don’t even stir because you’re the heavier sleeper, but even her redhead mom barely moves at the sound. She smiles at the sight of you cuddling before she glances to the last bit of the song playing on the screen before turning her attention to her phone.

Got us this today.

1 attachment

Nat almost forgot that her friends had gone to the mall today. She had considered going, but she enjoyed the time she’d spent with her parents and dogs today. She’d see her friends tomorrow and then they had a game after school. If they won, when they won, she’d get to have them over for pizza.

Nat looks at the picture of a t-shirt that she’s definitely seen before, but never got around to buying. It was a shirt that had the words ‘two moms are better than one’ on it. She and Taylor had mentioned getting these, but the other brunette had joked about wearing them to school together. Now they actually could. Natalya considers how this would go. She would definitely feel better to have Taylor do it too despite the fact that Stacy hadn’t really bothered her about having two moms. She was a little surprised, but she didn’t seem to care about that detail. She mostly harassed her for being a loner.

Natalya feels the urge to open up to her friend. The transient feeling of courage at the idea of walking into school wearing the shirt makes her type out a text and send it without thinking.

T, I need you to teach me how to throw a punch.

To be honest her aunts had taught her when she was younger, maybe 8, but she hadn’t practiced at all and she’d since forgotten. She knows that her friend will have her back and if she really chooses to go after Stacy, or at least retaliate, she needs to be prepared. She sets her phone down and allows herself to panic for a few seconds about the commitment she’s made. She knows it the right one. Maybe not the violence part, but she has to stand up for herself, right?

Nat’s still freaking out a little when her phone vibrates a couple seconds later. She ignores her movie and texts her friends for a bit mostly to ask about how the rest of their time at the mall went. Taylor seemed to realize that beyond agreeing to do as Nat requested, any other conversation about it should be in person. She didn’t want to put her on the spot or make her change her mind because she wanted Nat to do this. After talking to her moms briefly, Taylor decided that she was going to do everything she could to get Stacy off Nat’s back. She’s glad that Nat seems to finally be on board with it. She’ll just have to see how things go.

Despite the fact that she loved games and would always look forward to them, Natalya couldn’t deny the nerves that always plagued her during her first at-bat or first time in the outfield. She had just finished warming up and the she glances to her friends as they take the field first since it’s a home game. She watches Taylor throw one more practice pitch before the game begins. Taylor gets the ball back from the shortstop before turning to the batter that now waits for her.

The stands were all full and most of them with their fans. Nat's family alone took a whole row, and she smiled at the sight of her moms talking to Taylor's and Alyssa's dad. Her aunts sat beside you and then her uncle Pietro is between Steve and Bucky. They all scattered their arrivals. Her parents arrived first together while Nat and Yelena carpooled with Steve and Bucky. Pietro was later than he'd said he'd be, but he was sliding into a seat beside you before the first pitch was thrown.

After a quick stop beside the bleachers to greet their families, Nat, Taylor, and Alyssa all had to get ready to start. Nat did her best to remind herself to focus today despite the excitement of the first game, and the promise of pizza afterwards. She assumed they'd win and maybe that's why her attention was so hard to win over today.

She doesn't truly realize that she's spaced out until she's hit in the face by a ball. She'd been waiting for Taylor to throw the first pitch, only to realize she had thrown two and this third one was now sailing toward her. Despite her distracted state she'd had her hands up already, so when she spots the ball out of the corner of her eye she can catch it. However it hits her cheek first before falling into her glove, and she curses in surprise as she looks down at the ball with a frown.

"Well that works."

Natalya mumbles under her breath before she throws the ball back to the player at second base who shoots her a concerned look that she's already waving off. She's fine. It just aches and burns. When Taylor gets the ball back, she calls a timeout much to Nat's embarrassment. When her friend waves her toward the infield she shakes her head, but Taylor doesn't accept this. She waves her over and mouths "come here" and Nat finally relents with a sigh. She studiously avoids looking toward the stands, but she already knows she has far too many eyes on her.

"What's up?"

Taylor shoots her a look before glancing at her reddened and patterned cheek. She frowns as she smacks Nat's shoulder with her glove, and shoots her a questioning look.

"Do you want to go ice that?"

As expected, Nat shakes her head and manages a smile that's not too mangled before shrugging. She'd rather not dwell on the fact that she got so distracted so quickly and get on with the game. Taylor gets this and resists looking to the stands as well as she nods and sends Nat back to her post.

"Alright, your funeral. If you can focus and get through the rest of the game without getting hurt, you can have some of my pizza."

Nat's face lights up and Taylor just laughs before turning back toward Alyssa who had to resist the urge to come over too. She knew Nat wouldn't want all of the attention, and she'd rather not have to stand up only to squat down again.

"Really?"

"Yes, get to it."

You cringe and you hear Wanda gasp as you both watch the ball head toward your daughter who you quickly realize wasn't paying attention. Instead of her just missing the ball and having to scoop it up off the ground, it meets her face with an audible smack.

"Oh shit."

You hear your brother-in-law mutter this under his breath and you just nod in agreement as Nat manages to hold onto the ball. Well that's something at least. You only have a moment to wonder if someone's going to address this before Taylor's calling a time out and waving Nat in from the outfield. Your stubborn daughter tries to resist, but Taylor is equally stubborn and you watch as Nat runs in to talk to the other brunette. They have a short conversation before Nat's smiling and heading back. You can see her face is red and looks a little splotchy, but you're mostly worried about her mouth. Specifically if she knocked any teeth loose.

"Of course, she's just going back."

You turn toward your exasperated wife with a small smile as you pat her hand with a sigh of your own. Wanda turns to you and you kiss her cheek before whispering something that makes her roll her eyes.

"So stubborn. She gets that from you, my love."

Instead of arguing uselessly, Wanda just squeezes your hand before leaning against you with a sigh. She's glad that you were able to get off of work early today. You hadn't been sure when your day started because a potential emergency had been called in and they couldn't be seen until the end of the day. You'd been willing to see them then or earlier, but they'd ended up making other arrangements leaving you free to leave right on time. You met Wanda at home and debated bringing your dogs but that was a lot of fur and higher maintenance than you wanted this to be. You figured your many family members and exuberant daughter would be enough to keep you busy.

"Are you thinking about your fur babies?"

You consider trying to lie, but as you watch your daughter's friend make a fairly difficult play look easy you just sigh. You're honestly a little worried about your boys. Rogue is having a lot of trouble walking on hardwood floors, and it takes him a little longer to get up in the mornings. Once he gets going he's better, but watching him slip and struggle to get his footing is hard. You feel bad for him, but he's still a happy, healthy dog otherwise so you just do what you can to help him. There are a lot of carpets and rugs around the house to help him out, but the moment he touches hardwood he slows down. You think about your other dog and how he's better at getting around since he's a little younger, but his hearing is spotty at times. You remember when he could hear you shift in bed upstairs, and he'd come up to try to wake you. Now you could sneak up on him and startle him despite calling out his name.

You forget about these concerns for now as you wait for the third out. Regardless Wanda knows where your mind went because you've already discussed your concerns with her. She knew how difficult it was for you to talk about your fur children aging, and bringing up the subject of them dying made you cry. Despite having Boone longer, you love both of them and hate to see them suffer. You'd already told Wanda that if Rogue gets worse or Boone starts to struggle similarly, you'll need to have this discussion again.

"You know me so well."

Wanda squeezes your hand, but any response she'd had is cut off by the crack of a bat against a ball, and you both look up at the sound. Wanda spots it first and once she realizes it's trajectory is past the infield you both sit up a little.

"Take 2."

You wait to see what happens, and you smile as Little Nat runs to get under it. You had never been particularly athletic when you were younger. You played softball at Nat's age too mostly for something to do, but otherwise neither you nor Wanda played any sports. When you realized that Nat had a talent for sports you didn't feel the need to make her play more than this one. She enjoyed being on a team and playing for the most part, but she never expressed interest in anything else.

Seeing her smile as she chases after the fly ball, you're grateful that she's found something that she enjoys. You're also grateful that when she catches it she doesn't fall on her face. Unfortunately this has happened before. When it's time to switch sides, you get a better look at Natalya's face to see how angry it is. You didn't even realize that Yelena had snuck off to the concession stand until she's placing a bag full of cold on your lap. You jump in surprise and turn to glare at your friend before you hear your wife's voice.

"Natalya!"

That tone coming from her mom makes her stop in her tracks and look around for the older Maximoff. She sees her mom holding something, and she hurries over to her with a smile.

"Food?!"

You and Little Nat's uncles laugh and Natasha rolls her eyes at the predictable question. Wanda just shakes her head before shaking the bag with a pointed look.

"No, ice."

Natalya frowns slightly but she takes it with a nod, and a thank you before darting away. You pat your friend on the back with a smile before sliding over to pull her up with a groan.

"Thanks, auntie Yelena.”

She nudges your shoulder, but when you nudge her back it starts to escalate to full-blown shoving. You grumble under your breath at the blonde who just responds in kind before you hear your wife speak up. She takes your arm to bring you back toward her side and away from Yelena before addressing you both. You’re the only one who looks chastised through, not that you’d expect any different.

“Kids, settle down. Natalya’s up soon.”

You nod obediently while Yelena just sighs dramatically before turning her attention to the field. Not so secretly, Yelena is super into these games and you’re often competing with her to see who can cheer loudest. When Yelena learned that Nat was going to be playing a sport she’d read up on it and bought everything she’d need to practice with her niece. You found it adorable but didn’t dare make fun of her out of fear that she’d stop. You loved seeing how much Nat loved spending time with her aunt, and you didn’t want to do anything to mess that up.

For this reason, you just smile widely as Yelena stands up in anticipation. Leading off is someone that she doesn’t recognize because she only really pays attention to Little Nat and her two friends. This girl is tall and she’s clearly first because she can get a hit and get on base. She sends the ball in between the left and centerfielders and the latter falls just short of catching it. It ends up being a double and Nat’s cheering along with her teammates as she steps up toward the plate. She smiles widely as she hears her family cheering behind her, and she resists the urge to turn around as she steps into the box and lays her bat across it.

“Let’s go, Natalya!!! Crush them!”

Yelena is practically shouting in your ear and you can’t shove her off of you because she has an arm wrapped around your neck. You’re about to ask her to let go because she’s leaning on you a lot, but as soon as Nat’s on base she turns to you with a sigh. She glances to the bleachers beside them that houses most of the away team’s family. She catches some of their gazes, but they turn away quickly so Yelena ignores them for now.

“So, I brought you something. A new strain to try.”

You turn to watch Yelena reach into her pocket and pull out a bag of marijuana. She pushes it into your hand and you mutter a curse under your breath. Despite being grateful, you quickly stuff it in your pocket so no one notices, but as usual your wife catches on quickly. You will have to remember that you have this on you so you don’t lose it because you’re very excited to try it. Your current prescription was okay, but you weren’t above trying new things. You wanted as much control over your symptoms as possible, and since Wanda was aware of this she didn’t give you too hard of a time. That said, your daughter’s game was not an ideal setting for a drug deal.

“Holy shit, Lena not right now. But thank you.”

“Really, Yelena?”

Yelena nods before watching the next person go to bat with a sigh. She reaches out blindly for Wanda who leans away from her with an unconvincing glare.

“It’ll help Y/n, don’t be mad.”

Wanda sighs in defeat before she focuses back on the game. Specifically, her daughter on first base. She’s bouncing impatiently ready to run, and Wanda wonders how the brunette has so much energy. She’s seen her run around the backyard chasing Yelena’s dog and Wanda’s convinced that she could go for hours before getting tired. She imagines that her daughter’s chasing one of her pets as she runs to second. Belatedly, Wanda realizes the ball was hit directly to her destination. Luckily the ball hits the base and bounces off toward the outfield, so Natalya gets there safely. She considers running to third but the outfielder snags it quickly leaving her stuck at second. When Taylor steps up to the plate, everyone but the pitcher and catcher take a step back. The brunette has a reputation of being a consistent hitter, and she often gets doubles, if not triples. She doesn’t disappoint and when the first pitch is a strike low on the outside, Taylor sends it to the fence.

Everyone's cheering and standing up as they watch the rest of the players on base run home. Natalya gets there in plenty of time and she gets out of the way but watches as Taylor rounds second and heads for third despite the outfielder having the ball.

“Run Taylor, run!”

She and everyone else watches as the ball’s thrown when Taylor’s only half way to third. She sees the other player ready for the catch, so she quickly gets down and tries to avoid the tag. She’s covered in dirt but her hand's on the bag before she feels someone smack her with their glove. Luckily the call is made quickly and she gets a time out so she can stand up and brush herself off. Her team and family are cheering for her, and she offers them a little smile and a nod of her helmeted head. Alyssa’s up next and she knows that the blonde will bring her home. She relaxes a little and waits for the wind up of the pitch to get ready to run. She’s a few feet off the bag when she sees Alyssa duck out of the way. Once she realizes the ball is behind the catcher she keeps running and hits home before the pitcher can run up to help with the tag.

“Nice!”

“Get us to 4 to 1? No pressure though.”

Alyssa shoots her a glare but Taylor just laughs before heading to the dugout. She’s covered in dirt and it’s only the first inning, but similar to how Nat’s always hurt, she always goes home covered in dirt stains. She shares some of them with Nat as she hugs the other brunette with a wide smile. She pulls away and is holding up some snacks that Taylor immediately grabs with a grateful look.

“Way to go! We’re one step closer to pizza!”

Taylor rolls her eyes but she can’t argue with what Nat’s saying. Instead she turns her attention to Alyssa who has only been thrown one strike out of 4 pitches. She briefly glances toward the bleachers with a frown. Despite being a lot better than this team, she hopes that the game has at least been entertaining.

Wanda is talking to her brother when you hear the first insult that the other team’s crowd throws. You hadn’t given the opposing team much thought, but hearing their variety of insults makes you wonder if it’s better not to. Your daughter and her friends run out of the dugout back onto the field when the woman speaks up. She’s dressed in a simple sundress, and she has heavy makeup on that’s noticeable even with her sunglasses. Her long red hair is clearly dyed but you and Yelena are more concerned by her snide comment. You’re unaware that she’s loud enough to catch your brother-in-law’s attention until he responds almost immediately. Your brain is still trying to process what she said and how you could appropriately respond. Pietro beat you to it though.

“No wonder they’re doing so well. They’ve got a bunch of dykes on their team.”

Now your daughter has never explicitly told you anything related to her sexuality, and that’s fine with you and Wanda. You don’t care either way as long as she’s safe and kind to whoever she’s with, and they’re the same to her. The details are less important. You don't know how Taylor or Alyssa’s parents feel, but the looks on their faces is hint enough. They look as confused and pissed off as you feel.

“What did you just say?”

“Excuse me?”

You turn back to your wife when she speaks up. She looks furious and it only takes a few seconds for her to be standing up next to her brother who’s shooting the redhead a glare. She doesn’t seem fazed by it or the nearly half dozen set of eyes on her. She simply elaborates in a way that brings those she’s talking to into it, and specifically blames them.

“It makes sense after all. Dykes raise dykes.”

Pietro goes to get off the bleachers to most likely yell at this woman, but Wanda stills him with a hand on his chest and a stern look. She sizes up the other redhead with a scowl. She needs to be smart and not let her anger make her say something she’ll regret. She sees Taylor’s parents look equally mad but they seem to be waiting to see what she says. She’s not sure if she prefers this or not.

“Can you explain to me what you mean? I’m not sure I get how one relates to the other.”

You wince because you know where your wife is going with this. You aren’t sure if anyone else has caught on at this point, but you’re sure they’re suspicious since they know Wanda’s smart. Pietro is confused though while Nat and Yelena wait in silence to see how this plays out. Steve and Bucky were honestly the only ones paying attention to the game at this point.

When the woman speaks so matter of factly, Wanda has to resist the urge to smile at how well her trap worked. Wanda hates it when people are so blind and bigoted in general, but when that ignorance is directed toward anyone she loves she gets murderous.

“Simple. Growing up around those people makes them more susceptible to falling into similar unsavory ways.”

Nat has to grab her sister’s arm because she’s trying to jump off the bleachers to do who knows what. Steve’s picked up on the conversation at this point and he’s frowning as he turns away from watching Alyssa gets walked. You’re still tense with anticipation as Wanda moves from her seat and steps off the bleachers so she can speak without shouting.

“First of all, Natalya has grown up around many different people.”

She gestures to the annoyed people sitting behind her.

“Most of those people are her family, and yes one is my wife, but the idea of my daughter being influenced by anyone is laughable. She’s her own person, and no one is going to change that.”

She could say more but she holds back because cheering catches her attention. She turns toward the field to see that she’s missed Alyssa getting home, but another batter is tagged out in a double play leaving them with 2 outs. Wanda doesn’t hear a response or at least one worth taking note of, so she heads for the fence behind the batter’s box to watch for a while. She needs a moment to calm down, and she steals a glance at her daughter in the dugout. She’s a little surprised to see her already looking at her, and she offers a smile at her concerned look. She’s always so attuned to her parents feelings so she shakes her head so as not to worry her as she finishes up her game.

“Hey, that was badass.”

Wanda turns at the sound of her brother’s voice and at the same time she notices that you’re talking to Taylor’s parents with a small smile. She’s sure you’re making jokes or trying to make light of the situation, but she knows you’re not saying anything against what she’d done. You feel the exact same way about things as Wanda. You might be slightly more curious, but you would never ask outright. Wanda sighs before she shakes her head and looks back to the field.

“It’s just going to keep happening. Piet.”

Pietro frowns at the thought and the fact that he’s certain that his sister is correct. He’s honestly a little surprised that this is the first time that he knew of, or at least witnessed. Given how open Natalya was to her friends about everything, he doubted that his niece would hide the fact that she had two moms. In fact, he’s certain that she would defend them in any situation like this.

“I know, but all of us will do exactly what you just did. Natalya too. She would probably be less diplomatic about it though.”

Wanda laughs at this despite the fact that she doesn’t want her daughter cursing out anyone. She doesn’t need to get in trouble. She glances back toward the dugout to see that Natalya’s standing up and smiling as she cheers on her friends. She’s so proud of the younger Maximoff that she could cry just thinking about it too much. Her daughter’s become an intelligent, kind person who’s capable of taking care of herself. Wanda couldn’t be prouder.

“I know she will. I just hate that she has to deal with it.”

You shift so you’re turned toward Taylor's parents, and you prop your elbows on your knees with a sigh. You know that they’re still irritated at the redhead who’s looking at them as she whispers to the people beside her. You do your best to ignore it as you smile slightly.

“I’ve always disliked sore losers. Despite occasionally being one myself.”

Leah, Taylor’s brunette mom, laughs quietly as her wife relaxes slightly at your words. You know she’s the one who’s more prone to take offense at these types of things, and you don’t blame her. However, you don’t want the mood to be too ruined. It was the girls' first game of the season and they were winning so far and probably would in the end. You want to enjoy that. You want all of the parents present to enjoy that.

“I’m sure you’re much more gracious when you lose.”

You can’t help but laugh at this as you turn your attention to the blonde. She’s squeezing her wife’s hand in a way that reminds you to check on Wanda briefly before offering the couple a response. Wanda’s talking to her brother in hushed tones, and you can tell that they’re not speaking English based on how their lips are moving. You decide that Pietro has her covered for now and you focus on everyone else.

“I’m afraid Wanda would tell you differently if you asked.”

It’s not until the last inning where Nat’s team is up by 8 that you hear another insult worth noting. Taylor’s pitching and she just needs to hold them for another out before they win. She’s thrown two balls so far and she’s a little stressed because she can feel herself fading. She’d had a slightly violent tag at home, and despite getting the out the runner had slammed into her side in a spiteful yet somehow not ejection worthy play. Taylor had ended up on the ground and now being a little sore had become a lot sore as she continued to pitch. She threw another ball and she had to stop herself from cursing audibly as it hit the dirt.

“Shit!”

Taylor turns her back to the batter and tries to take a deep breath. She’s getting frustrated and whenever that happens she gets even worse at pitching. She looks out toward the outfield where she sees Nat looking at her with a small frown. When she sees she has the other brunette’s attention she gives her a wide smile and a thumbs up.

“Quit flirting and get on with it!”

Taylor tenses in surprise and anger at the words and she’s spinning around before she can stop herself. She looks to the stands opposite of her parents to try and figure out who spoke but she can’t figure out who it is. She decides to just throw the last pitch and get someone on first. She’s confident that if she tries to steal second Alyssa can catch her.

Wanda stiffens at the familiar voice and Taylor’s parents turn to glare at the redhead who they’d hoped had shut up. She ignores their looks and watches with another smile as Taylor throws the fourth pitch that’s a ball with a grimace. She curses again as she watches the girl walk to first and she turns back to Alyssa to catch the throw. The blonde hesitates as she shoots her friend a worried look that she just shakes her head at. She squeezes the ball tightly in her hand as she looks to her coach for guidance. She’s told to just do whatever which she loves and hates at the moment.

She tunes out the cheering from her friends on the field and her parents as she twists the ball in her hand. She can do this. One more out and she’s done. Then she gets pizza. This thought makes her smile slightly and she takes a deep breath as she winds up and throws a pitch right over the plate.

“Strike one!”

Taylor’s smile widens as she sees Alyssa smile before she turns to make sure the runner on base isn’t trying to steal. She watches her out of the corner of her eye as she catches the ball with a sigh. She glances at her coach and gets the same signal before winding up again. She feels her side spasm right before she releases the ball and she grimaces as she nearly doubles over.

She doesn’t throw a strike but the batter was anxious and she swings and makes contact sending the ball between first and second. She should have tried to get it but she can still feel her side throbbing so she just stands in the circle following the ball with her eyes. She watches it reach the outfield and she sighs in defeat when the first runner rounds second.

“Go three!”

Taylor breathes a sigh of relief as the ball is thrown to second and then third just in time for the lead runner to be tagged out. Once the game is called, she doubles over and rests her hands on her knees with a loud groan. She’s definitely getting a lot of pizza for this.

“How are you feeling, honey?”

Taylor offers a pained smile as she finishes chewing her victory pizza with her friends and all of their parents. They’d decided to go to the closest place and gotten the largest table to fit all 14 of them before ordering 5 pizzas. They were all glad the game was over for different reasons, but Taylor was probably the most relieved. Immediately after she’d come to the dugout her coach had been waiting with a bag of ice and Alyssa had promised to have her mom take a look at her side. She’d met them at the pizza place after her shift ended and she’d looked at Natalya and Taylor before they all sat down to eat. Other than being sore, she figured that the duo would be alright. They were young and resilient and she had no doubt that they would bounce back quickly.

“Tired, but good. I’m glad it’s over!”

Nat and Alyssa nod in agreement as they continue to eat their own pizza. Nat was sitting between her parents and Alyssa was next to her mom and Taylor who was leaning on her a little bit.

“Same! I was getting tired and angry.”

You’re surprised by this and you turn to your daughter to ask why she felt this way, but Alyssa beats you to it. You hadn’t realized that Nat could hear all of the insults that had been thrown out by the very sore losers.

“Me too. I forgot how annoying hecklers could be. And uncreative.”

Everyone nods in agreement as their minds go to one incident or another before Wanda decides to change the subject. She doesn’t want to dwell on the annoying woman who she hopefully wouldn’t see again. She takes out her phone and opens her dog cam app before handing it to her daughter. She knows that Nat loves to see what the dogs are up to and since she’d been about to check anyway she figures she’ll let Nat do it.

“Natalya, do you want to check on them?”

Nat immediately knows what her moms talking about, and so do her friends but most everyone else is confused. You understand of course and you smile before watching the brunette excitedly grab Wanda’s phone and quickly look to the screen.

“Yes! How are you doggos?”

Pietro just laughs before he smirks at his sister who’s about to take another bite of her pizza. Conversation continues as he eyes his niece curiously before speaking up.

“Are you sure you should give her free reign of your phone? Don’t you have nudes on there?”

Both you and Wanda shoot the older Maximoff an annoyed glare and Wanda considers slapping him. Instead, she’s surprised to hear her daughter speak up in only slightly choppy Sokovian.

“Ew, that’s gross Uncle Piet. I didn’t need to hear that.”

Wanda shoots her brother a smug look when he struggles to find a response for a few seconds. Although they’re not sure what is being said, Taylor speaks up with a curious look. She mutters mostly under her breath but everyone hears her.

“Do we even want to know?”

Taylor's well aware that despite loving him, Nat’s uncle can be trouble. He mostly liked to bicker with his sister, but he also made sure to be a good and embarrassing uncle when at all possible. Natalya shakes her head as she continues to look through the many cameras in their house for her dogs. Fletcher was unsurprisingly just lounging on the couch.

“Definitely not. He’s being gross.”

You’re still smiling as your mind wanders to what could be on your wife’s phone. You don’t get very far because Wanda’s hand falls to your leg and she squeezes it as she mutters something that you only nod at.

“Get your mind out of the gutter.”

No promises. You smile and Wanda rolls her eyes while Nat shakes her head with a sigh. She’s spotted Boone who’s walking out of her parents’ room, and then Rogue who’s waiting on his bed downstairs for you all to come home. She shows the phone to her friends, and despite being less interested than her they still smile at the sight of Nat’s pets.

“Now mom’s being gross, but look at the good boys!”

Dinner ends and the trip home seems quick and Nat nearly falls asleep twice in the car. Once they arrive, she nearly runs out of the car to greet her dogs. You go to the backseat to grab her forgotten bag before reaching out for your wife’s arm with a smile.

“How is she still running around?”

Wanda just shakes her head as she follows you inside to find Nat greeting your dogs excitedly. After a round of scratches, both shepherds run toward you in greeting and you smile as you hold out your hand to them. Boone gets there faster as expected, but Rogue still makes good time as he runs into Wanda’s legs. Your wife laughs as she releases your arm and scratches her dog behind his ears.

“Hi good boy. We missed you.”

Both dogs bark in agreement and you decide then and there to take them to the next game. Maybe they’d scare away any hecklers. The dogs follow you around as you complete your nightly routines. Nat sits at her spot in the dining room with her book spread out over the table as she starts on her homework with a yawn. She’s always especially tired after a game, and she struggles to finish up as a couple hours go by and she's constantly yawning or distracted by Boone at her feet or Fletcher jumping on the table.

“How’s it going, Little Nat?”

You’d just finished up answering some emails for work, and after finally remembering to put up your pot, you decide to check on your daughter. Wanda’s cleaning up a mess Fletcher made, but you’re sure she’ll come downstairs soon to start busying herself in the kitchen. She usually makes Natalya’s lunch the night before and if she’s finished with homework, she’d help out. Since she’s finishing up work, Wanda might get started without her but cooking with her mom is one of her favorite activities. She loves spending time with her parents in any capacity, but if it involves food, dogs or movies she’s usually the most excited.

Nat looks up with a sigh before shaking her head and telling her mom the truth. She’s distracted as usual, but for the first time in a while it’s by something specific. She wonders if she should even bring it up given how quickly her other mom had changed the subject at dinner. Maybe she just hadn’t wanted to talk about it in front of other people. Or maybe she didn’t want to talk about it at all. That’s why she’s bringing it up to her vet mom first.

“Slow. I keep thinking about that mom at the game today.”

You had not been expecting this and you’re sure it shows as you frown and sit down across from your daughter with a curious look. You would like to see where Nat’s going with this.

“What about her?”

You’re not dense. You’re sure that your daughter’s thinking about her homophobic comments that she’d shared as the game went on. That said, you can’t say for certain what it is that’s specifically bothering her. Nat’s surprised you plenty of times in the past, and she really was a great reminder that assuming things was just a way to make a fool of yourself. You watch as scowls at the thought of what she’d heard and then been told by her friends earlier today.

She had faced very little backlash over having two moms. Maybe because she kept to herself mostly and no one paid that much attention to her. Or maybe she’d hoped that even young teens wouldn’t be so petty and close minded. The truth that she still didn’t know was that Taylor had played a large part in why no one bothered her. People made the mistake of coming after her first and unsurprisingly she fought back and warded them off from doing the same to her friend.

Nat finally looks over your shoulder as if checking to see of you’re alone before she finally admits what’s on her mind.

“I was just afraid that everyone would be like her, but I guess I wouldn’t know. I don’t remember people bothering you and mama when I was younger.”

You try not to react too much at what Nat says because this is a sensitive subject that you don’t want to mess up. You remember when Natalya was first born and Wanda was still very well-known despite being retired. No one dared to come after them or even look at them wrong after that first year with Nat. Whether this was Strucker’s doing or simply another example of your wife’s far-reaching influence you could only say that you were grateful.

Occasionally when Nat was 2 or 3, and you and Wanda would venture out together, you’d get stared at some, but that only lasted so long. Steve and Bucky hung out around you three at first because Wanda didn’t want to risk anything happening, but fairly quickly she realized that no one seemed to care about her anymore. It was a strange feeling because Wanda had spent so much time being at the forefront of her business, and as a very public figure she always turned heads and warranted people’s attention and respect.

One day after work, you’d come home to find her in the bedroom with a napping Natalya. You’d been concerned when you realized she was crying, and you’d immediately dropped down beside her and tried to figure out what was wrong. You’d been a little thrown off when she’d told you that she felt invisible. You automatically wracked your brain for what you could have done to cause her to feel this way. When you’d asked, she’d simply shook her head and told you what she meant.

No one pays attention to me anymore when I go out. It’s like they’ve forgotten who I was.

The smile after Wanda had said this clued you in to the fact that your wife was actually happy instead of upset. She’d never thought that she’d be able to walk through life without being noticed, without being a target, but she was and she was thrilled.

Your mind wanders back to the present moment and you shake your head as you shoot your daughter a smile.

“We didn’t really have this problem when we first met. This is the first time in a while for sure. I can assure you that even though there will be more people like her, she’s not the majority, Natalya.”

Nat nods absentmindedly. She believes you but she also wonders how you dealt with something like this. She needs a little advice now that she’s committed to try to get Stacy to leave her the hell alone. She wants to know how her mom would handle this. That said, she didn’t ask this immediately because she’s side tracked by the idea of her parents first meeting. She smiles slightly before tilting her head in a way that reminds you of your wife.

“How did you and Mama first meet?”

You chuckle under your breath as you shoot Natalya a curious look. You reach out your free hand to pet Boone who’s come to sit beside you before tilting your head in response. You don’t notice that Wanda’s finished up cleaning and she’s on her way downstairs when you respond.

“You’ve heard this story many times, Nat.”

The brunette nods in agreement because she certainly has, but she never gets tired of hearing it. She can’t help but adore how her parents just happened to be in the same place at the same time. She also loved how the story changed a little bit each time, and depending on who told it.

“I know, but I wanted to hear it again.”

Wanda sneaks downstairs as you tell Nat about how you two met decades ago. Both of you still thank whatever higher power brought you two together. Wanda occasionally wonders what would have happened if she had given up trying to find you. Would she be married? Or more likely would she be working still? She’s honestly not sure that she’d still be alive, but she pushes this thought aside as she quietly comes up behind you while you’re speaking.

“I still think that she skulked around until she saw me again.”

Despite the truth of your words, Wanda still rolls her eyes in exasperation as she sets her hands on your shoulders with a sigh. She’s smiling when you turn around to face her, and a hand covers hers before you pull her down to sit beside you.

“I did not. I just happened to be in the area.”

You scoff at the ridiculousness of this statement. Something that Natalya may never truly understand. You shake your head before squeezing your wife’s hand with a knowing look.

“Sure, Wands.”

Nat just smiles at her parents’ interaction before she debates telling them what she’d really like to know. She’s felt like she had it handled, but since getting burnt she realizes that maybe she’s just become complacent. She glances down to her hand that was mostly healed at this point with a frown. It only bothered her because it was itchy but she knew better than to scratch at the newly forming skin. Nat mutters something under her breath that her parents don’t hear, and she’s not brave enough to say it again.

“I want to be happy like you two.”

Wanda looks up at the sound, but she can’t make out what her daughter said. You’d been lost in the memory of meeting a beautiful, mysterious brunette, so you’d missed it completely.

“What was that?”

Nat quickly shakes her head before she wipes the tears she didn’t realize were welling up in her eyes. She’s happy for her parents. She feels so grateful to have two moms who love each other and her so much. Even when they’re scarring her when she walks in on them making out or she overhears them talking about nudes. She sighs as her mom walks around the table to pull her into a hug. She sinks into the redhead’s side before hugging her tightly.

“I’m glad you two found each other.”

Masterlist

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda x reader #wanda maximoff x female reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda x you #growing pains #post mob life #natalya maximoff

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flyboytracy · 26 days

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#Thunderbirds Are Go #John Tracy #Growing Pains

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daughterofcainnnn · 29 days

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growing pains

requested by @angelsforever

#carpet bed ep #ethelcain #hayden anhedönia #southern gothic #southern gothic aesthetic #preachers daughter #pinterest girl #pinterest #source: pinterest #dark moodboard #moodboard #growing pains

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marril96 · 8 months

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The Vampire Diaries 4.01 | Growing Pains

#damon salvatore #vampire diaries #the vampire diaries #tvd #tvdedit #tvedit #tusergabs #ian somerhalder #4x01 #growing pains #my gifs #edit

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moon-witchs-world · 11 months

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Growing Pains - Remus J. Lupin

Growing Pains – part one

A Hogwarts Tale

Remus Lupin x Fem!WitchReader

2,8k words

Summary: In 1994 both reader and Remus Lupin are newly appointed teachers at Hogwarts, school of witchcraft and wizardry. They meet again after 13 years, when they last saw each other at the very same school. Remus struggles with his secret being shared with the full staff and Y/N struggles with feelings she has for a certain someone.

This is part one of a multiple part series.

Masterlist

You saw him at exactly the same moment he saw you. Thirteen years had gone by ever since you saw him, in this same castle before you both went your separate ways. You were pleased to notice he hadn’t changed much. Sure, he had gotten older, just like yourself, but you would recognize those green eyes and kind smile everywhere. Remus Lupin was standing by himself, surrounded by the other teachers, some of whom were your own teachers during your time at Hogwarts.

As soon as Remus caught your eyes, he smiled and quickly approached you. He seemed happy to see a familiar face.

When he got closer you noticed he had definitely changed more than you assumed at first. His eyes, still kind and friendly, were lined and his face was covered in scars. His clothes were old and repaired at different places.

‘Y/N L/N? What a pleasant surprise to see you here,’ he said after he placed his hand on yours for a moment.

‘Or did you end up changing your last name?’ he added with a grin. His comment made your blood freeze. You shook your head in response.

‘It’s just L/N. How are you, Remus. I wasn’t expecting you here.’

His grin turned into a proper smile.

‘Really? I always assumed you would marry your high school sweetheart as soon as you left Hogwarts as Head Boy and Head Girl.’

You didn’t respond right away. Maybe lying would be easier, but then again, the truth always came out and you weren’t looking forward to having explain why you lied about such a crucial part of your life story. Something that had changed you forever.

‘We did actually. Get married,’ you said softly, hoping no other person but Remus would hear your words. His eyes widened, observing you with a puzzled look in his eyes, as if he was trying to solve a mystery.

‘You got divorced.’

‘He died.’

Remus took a step back, creating more space between the two of you and you immediately wish you never told him. His smile had disappeared as easily as it had appeared and he looked at you with worry written all over his face.

‘I’m so sorry I asked, Y/N. I had no idea.’ He extended his hand, but never let his fingers touch you. Instead he let them float in the air, as if he was not sure where to put them.

‘It’s okay, Remus. It happened five years ago. He got into an accident at work,’ you explained with a weak smile. The widow part of your life story was always a bit awkward to discuss and you tried to avoid talking about it whenever it was possible.

‘I didn’t know you were a professor,’ you mentioned casually, desperate to change the subject but at the same time genuinely surprised.

‘I’m actually new here. Starting tomorrow as Defence Against the Dark Arts professor.’ He said this with a proud smile.

‘We have that in common. Not the Defence part, but I start tomorrow as well. Charms.’

‘Obviously,’ he said matter-of-factly. You raised your eyebrows in question.

‘I remember you were an excellent student, even for a Ravenclaw. Professor Flitwick used to rave about your spell work all the time,’ he explained. You averted your gaze when you felt your cheeks burning.

‘It’s only natural you take over from him during his sabbatical,’ he added. Professor Dumbledore had contacted you personally to ask whether you would be willing to return to Hogwarts to teach Charms for a year while Professor Flitwick was away travelling. You felt deeply honored he even considered you and replied by returning owl you would love the job. It was very different from your usual work at the Ministry, where you had been working for the Department of Magical accidents and catastrophes. But Remus was right, your spell work was impeccable.

‘You weren’t a bad student yourself, Remus, you were a prefect as well.’

He chuckled and shook his head.

‘Dumbledore mainly made me a prefect so I could keep my friends in order. I was weak of course and let them misbehave all the same while conveniently looking the other way,’ he said with a smile on his face. You laughed at his comment.

‘What have you been up to after graduating? I can’t believe we never crossed paths again,’ you asked him. His expression changed and he averted his eyes. But he never answered, for you were interrupted.

‘Lupin. Seeing you here is living proof the headmaster is very desperate to fill the position of Defence Against the Dark Arts professor to let someone like yourself teach our young witches and wizards,’ you heard a sly voice behind you. You turned around and saw yet another familiar face from your time at Hogwarts.

Severus Snape was looking at Remus Lupin with a look in his eyes that was something between disgust and confusion.

‘Severus, lovely to see you as well. It’s always nice to see a familiar face when you’re about to start a new job. Takes some of the tension away,’ you said sarcastically before Remus could reply.

‘Y/N? I didn’t recognize you right away. I see you’ve found your way back to Hogwarts as well.’ Severus’ voice had softened. The two of you had never been friends, you were simply too different, but you and Severus had always had some sort of unspoken respect for each other. He was smart, cunning and a bit shy. You used to partner during Potions from time to time because you both enjoyed to work with someone who was quiet and studious.

‘I have. And since we’re all colleagues now, maybe it’s time to leave the past in the past,’ you said urgently. Remus’ friends James and Sirius had always bullied Severus and even though you were fairly sure Remus himself was never involved, Severus despised him by association.

Severus didn’t get a chance to respond, because Albus Dumbledore had started talking.

‘Welcome everyone. Before we go to the Great Hall to welcome our students, I have a few announcements to make. First of all, I’d like to thank each and every one of you extraordinary witches and wizards for returning to Hogwarts to teach our young minds. It’s an incredible honour to be in the presence of so many talented and dedicated people.’

Professor McGonagall coughed, which seemed to remind the headmaster he was going somewhere with his speech.

‘But let’s not dwell on that for too long. Firstly I’d like to introduce and welcome miss Y/N L/N. she kindly agreed to teach Charms this year while professor Flitwick is away travelling. Her magnificent work for the Ministry is proof she is more than capable to teach our students everything they need to when it comes to Charms.’ The headmaster beamed at you and started clapping. You felt a bit shy when the other teachers joined in and you were glad when professor Dumbledore spoke again.

‘The other announcement is a bit more serious. I’m very happy to welcome Remus Lupin, who will fill the vacancy of Defence against the Dark Arts professor. He is very capable and intelligent and I look forward to see our students learn from him. However, there is a matter that needs to be addressed about a certain… condition.’

You felt a lump in your throat when the headmaster spoke these words. It sounded ominous. You tried to catch Remus’ eyes, but he was staring at professor Dumbledore, seemingly unaware of your attempts to look at him.

‘Before I explain I have to mention that this piece of information should not travel further than this room. It must not be shared with the students. As a young boy, Remus was bitten by a werewolf. This forces him to turn into a wolf every full moon.’

The entire room had gone quiet and it felt like all there was no oxygen left in the room.

‘Fortunately, we have a very talented Potions Master in our midst who will provide our new professor with the Wolfsbane potion to ease the symptoms around the full moon. I’d like to remind you all again that this information is not to be shared with anyone else, especially not the students. Are there any questions?’

The headmaster looked around the room and a content smile appeared on his face when no one spoke.

‘Thank you for listening and please follow me to the Great Hall.’

~~**~~

All throughout the feast, you tried to get Remus’ attention, but you were unsuccessful. You sat in between Rubeus Hagrid and Sybill Trelawney, the game keeper and the Divination professor. Both were kind and asked lots of questions about your work at the Ministry and why you decided to return to Hogwarts.

However, the feast seemed to last forever and even though you had looked forward to be able to enjoy a Hogwarts feast after all these years, you could barely eat anything. The news about Remus had upset you and you wanted nothing more than to talk to him. To ask him how he was doing and to ask if there was anything you could do to help him.

It was a relief when the desserts had disappeared from the tables and the headmaster had send the students off to bed. You got up quickly as well, but you felt a strong grip on your wrist. When you looked up, you saw Sybill staring at you.

‘Be sure to visit me soon, miss Y/L/N. Your aura is uncommonly strong, I’m sure I’ll be able to see all about your future in my crystal ball,’ she said urgently. You nodded quickly and was relieved when she let go off your wrist. Sitting through an entire feast with her next to you had been dreadful and you had no intention of ever visiting her office, but you were just trying to get away from her.

Remus was already leaving the Great Hall and you quickly followed him. When you pasted the headmaster, you smiled and wished him a good night.

The corridor was deserted and you walked a bit faster. When you turned right, you saw him again.

‘Remus!’ He didn’t respond and you were no longer walking but running.

‘Remus! REMUS! WOULD YOU STOP WALKING AWAY FROM ME AND LISTEN?’ you yelled. You had completely lost your temper. Whereas you were always calm and collected, him ignoring you made you so angry you yelled at him. Your sudden rage felt embarrassing, but at least it was effective. Remus had stopped walking and turned around to face you.

‘I’m not really in the mood for small talk, miss L/N,’ he said without looking at you. This angered you even more.

‘Excuse me? Miss L/N?’ you repeated. You were so surprised at his sudden cold approach to you there was nothing else you could say. You started to tremble slightly.

‘We’re not doing this,’ he said coldly. When he finally looked at you, he looked even more tired than when you met earlier, his eyes bloodshot.

‘Doing what?’

‘Being friendly. Dumbledore explained everything. I’m dangerous.’

You shook your head in disbelief.

‘You’re hardly dangerous right now. The full moon was two days ago. You’re as dangerous as I am for about a month.’

‘You’re not stupid, Y/N. I am dangerous. I don’t want to get close to anyone. I’m grateful to Dumbledore for getting me a job and that is what I’m here to do. Teach.’

‘This is crazy, Remus. I’m not afraid of you and like you mentioned, I’m not stupid. I’m perfectly capable of choosing my own company and I choose you. I don’t care about your stupid problem.’

A tiny, careful smile appeared on his face, though it didn’t seem to reach his eyes.

‘You’re the first person to ever call me being a werewolf a ‘stupid problem’,’ he said gloomily.

‘Well, it is. It’s just a stupid thing. You were a child when you got bitten. There’s nothing you can do to change what happened. The only thing you can do is take responsibility and make yourself less dangerous. And according to the headmaster, you did exactly that. Please don’t isolate yourself, Remus. There’s no need to.’

He shook his head.

‘I’m sorry to tell you, but I have to. It’s safest for everyone.’ He turned around, but before he could walk away, you started talking.

‘Why did you act so nice then? Earlier? You knew Dumbledore would tell the staff about your condition. Why bother being nice to me if you were planning to give me the silent treatment afterwards?’

There was so much you didn’t say. Like the fact that you felt happier than you did in a long time when you saw him. How he had made you feel a little less insecure about teaching when he complimented your spell work from over a decade ago. How proud it made you feel that he had remembered your full name, even though you had been sorted into different houses and were never friends.

‘I was genuinely happy to see you, Y/N. I stupidly forgot I intended to keep my distance. I felt drawn to you,’ he said softly. The silence felt heavy. So many things were left unsaid.

‘But I have remembered it now and that’s just in time. Good night, Y/N.’ Once more he turned around and this time, he walked away.

‘I will not let you get away this easily. Trust me, you’ll want to have a friend around here.’ You had no idea if your words were going to persuade him, but you weren’t just going to let him deal with this all by himself.

Part two

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin reader insert #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x fem!reader #remus x reader #remus lupin imagine #remus john lupin #remus lupin series #growing pains

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andrhomeda · 5 months

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GROWING PAINS a short comic I made last year for Synth/ORG vol.2 an Italian comic anthology by Attaccapanni Press instagram | twitter | support my art!

#comic #growing pains #comic art #webcomic #gore #body horror #comics #indie comic #gorecore #body gore #original comic #web comic #drawing #my art #andrhomeda #artists on tumblr #art #my comic #webtoon

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lynxgriffin · 1 year

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One day, your mom's gonna get sick of you, you little freak.

Part three of what will be a real short four-part series. Based on this total crack theory! Susie's finally past the hard part of this, and then of course, the other shoe drops.

Start | Previous | Next

#deltarune #lynx art #susie #susie deltarune #growing pains #cw: parental abandonment #not sure if there's other tags I should use?#either way! her parents still suck #also give Susie ham!!!#at least Ralsei gets her a nice room later

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mediumtires · 8 months

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Toto is in his office, the distinct sounds of sharing a space with someone dulled by heavy wood, and he’s staring at his bright screen, and somehow his throat has closed up enough for him to clear it, twice. There’s a strangely tight feeling right behind his sternum, in the middle of his chest, one that he can’t quite seem to reach.

short sequel to Growing Pains, from Toto’s POV. 2.6k

Christian has crow’s feet. On the right, it’s eleven deep lines, four of them curving upwards when he smiles, the rest fanning down, and off to the side of his face. Left, it’s seven. A few less, but still just as deep. They pull in his cheeks when he smiles.

Toto loves those lines. He was there when there were only four on the left, six on the right. Deeper though. They were even deeper back then, for some reason.

Toto was also there for the teeth. He was there when Christian started to let his stubble grow, he was there for the first grey hairs that led to a life changing haircut. He was there when Christian quietly started to size up his jeans.

He was there when Christian got appendicitis on New Year’s Eve, was there for food poising more than once, was there for broken toes and bruised fingers when they were renovating the farm. He was there when Christian’s brother got diagnosed with cancer. Was there for the party too, when he was finally cancer free.

What Toto wasn’t there for was Christian winning his first title in eight years. It’s not a secret, he knows, Christian knows. Of course they know; it’s one of the biggest hurdles they ever had to overcome, the fact that he wasn’t there for it.

He’d made his position crystal clear; December 2021, and the months after shaped by the decisions he had made. Toto had his team to worry about that night. Lewis, Valtteri, Bono, Andrew, James, everyone else. Himself. He’d had enough to worry about. He didn’t think about Christian very much that night. Not about his crow’s feet, or the ring on his left hand, or the fact that they were in big big trouble. He’d done it deliberately, knowingly. And he doesn’t regret it. Hasn’t, since, mostly because he can’t allow himself to. He’s regretted many things, the aftermath, the months of fighting. But he doesn’t regret standing up for his team that night.

Only now… Now Toto is in his office at home, behind his big desk, with the door closed, the distinct sounds of sharing a space with someone dulled by heavy wood, and he’s staring at his bright screen, and somehow his throat has closed up enough for him to clear it, twice. There’s a strangely tight feeling right behind his sternum, right in the middle of his chest, one that he can’t quite seem to reach.

There’s a video playing, one that he’s not sure he even clicked on himself, one that he really shouldn’t be watching. What he should be doing is preparing for his meeting with the Petronas people first thing tomorrow morning.

Instead, his eyes follow Christian, champagne soaked, shaky handed, teary eyed, on his way from the pit wall to the garages to the podium back to the garages. He looks—Toto can’t think of the right word for it. He can only think about the look on his face, equal parts mind shattering relief, pure joy and pure devastation, though Toto knows that part is only for him to see. And his crow’s feet. Eleven deep lines accompanying his watery smile.

He looks devastating to Toto. It’s a strange realisation because until now, Abu Dhabi has only ever been painful to think about. And it still is, in most ways. Only now that he’s looking at his husband through a screen, watching him getting celebrated, congratulated, touched by a million other people, Toto is kicking himself that he wasn’t there to see him like this when he had the chance. He never got to see this joy on Christian’s face in real life. Instead, what they did was so much worse, so much more painful.

Toto has trouble swallowing around the knot in his throat. Suddenly he has the stupid urge to put his hand to his computer screen, touch his fingertips to the bright lights and follow the soft lines of Christian’s face, sweaty and champagne wet, teary eyed and grinning so wide it must’ve hurt his cheeks. Toto wants that version of him, badly, so badly in fact, that his heart seizes in his chest, thudding hard.

Christian is in the kitchen. He’s making dinner, the dogs at his feet following his every move with big hopeful eyes. Christian doesn’t turn around when Toto comes in, his voice drowned out by the extractor fan as he says, “Dinner’ll be another few.”

Toto couldn’t care less about dinner right now. He stalks up to where Christian is watching over sizzling eggs in a pan, and a second later he’s got him pressed to the counter, licking into his mouth. Christian makes an undignified noise at the back of his throat and the spatula he was holding topples to the floor. Toto doesn’t care. His hands are on Christian’s cheeks, and he can feel his crow’s feet beneath his thumbs. He tastes salt and the tangy sweetness of cherry tomatoes.

Christian presses his palms flat to his chest and pushes. “Hey!” He tries to bring distance between them, and Toto lets him, of course he does, but he still curls himself around Christian’s body, tucks his face into his neck, kisses the leathery skin there too.

“What the fuck has gotten into you?” Christian’s arms come up around Toto’s back only reluctantly. “I’m going to burn the bloody eggs!”

“Sorry.” Toto should be letting him go. Christian has put effort into making dinner, and Toto respects that. Still, he has a hard time moving away from him.

“What’s—” Christian’s face is one big question mark. “Darling? You alright?”

Toto bends to pick the spatula up from the ground and turns away to give it a quick rinse in the sink. “Ja,” he says. “I’m fine.”

Christian’s expression is critical when he takes the spatula back. He goes back to stirring the eggs, stocky and yellow, then turns the heat down with a flick of his wrist. Toto wants to kiss him so badly. The images of Christian, victorious in Abu Dhabi won’t leave his mind. Nor his chest.

Christian turns back around and this time it’s he who pulls Toto in by the hips, presses their bodies together. He leans in and there’s a kiss to the corner of Toto’s mouth, feathery light. Toto can’t help but wrap himself around Christian again, breathing him in, relieved. “What’s going on?” Christian asks carefully, fingertips dipping beneath the waistline of Toto’s chinos.

He feels so familiar in Toto’s arms. Toto has so many regrets right now, but he can’t possibly tell him. Not with everything they’ve been through. Not with how hard they’ve worked to come out the other side, he can’t bring it all back up again.

“Nothing,” he murmurs into Christian’s hair. Eyes closed. He smells familiar too. Toto would recognise him anywhere by this alone, the musky notes of his cologne, a hint of leather from the wristband of his watch, undertones of sweat mixed with laundry detergent. “I just wanted to kiss my husband.”

“Come here then.” This time it’s Christian’s fingers on his jaw pulling their faces close, and then it’s gentle brushes of lips, painfully meaningful, tongues coming together in deep licks, Toto brushing the roof of Christian’s mouth, the back of his teeth, tasting everything. He wants all of it and more, and he’s so mad at himself for everything that happened in 2021. He wishes he could turn back the time, make better decisions, just a couple. Not even to win, it’s not about that. Just. For them. He should’ve done better.

Christian kisses back with the same intensity. One of his hands is on Toto’s cheek, fingertips brushing into his hair, lightly stroking his temple, his cheekbone. His stubble rubs against Toto’s top lip and Toto wants more of it, wants this forever.

“‘m sorry.”

Christian pulls back, confused. “Mhm?”

Toto wants to kick himself. “Nothing.” He leans in again, but Christian doesn’t let him get away with it.

“What do you mean, you’re sorry? Sorry for what?”

Toto breathes around a deep sigh. He lets his forehead tip to Christian’s but keeps his eyes shut. Breathes him in. So familiar.

“It’s nothing.”

“Toto,” Christian warns.

“I was watching something. That’s all.”

“Porn?”

Toto pulls back with an offended puff of breath and when their eyes meet Christian is laughing. “Darling, it’s fine. I don’t mind.”

“I wasn’t watching porn in my office, Christian.” He’s genuinely offended Christian would think— “I— Come on.”

A grin spreads over Christian’s face, making his crow’s feet crinkle, fanning deeply up and down the sides. “Whatever you’re doing in there is fine with me, darling. No hard feelings.”

“Just—shut up,” Toto tells him even though his heart is still cracked wide open. He turns away. Walks over to the stove to stir the eggs. They look a little more brown than yellow now.

“Hey.” Christian brushes both of his palms down Toto’s back, then wraps his arms around him from behind to press a kiss between his shoulder blades. “Sorry. You’re upset. What is it?”

“It’s nothing.” Toto sighs softly.

“It’s clearly something. You ambushed me in the kitchen. Something’s up.”

“I didn’t mean to—”

“Toto. Darling.” Christian’s arms tighten around him, both palms pressed to the softest part of his stomach now, left and right to his navel. He tingles from the inside out.

“I was watching a video about Abu Dhabi.” He admits to it quietly, half of him hoping Christian won’t hear him over the sizzling of the pan. “I don’t even know… It just popped up, it was attached to an email. But I didn’t mean to bring it up again, I’m sorry. I don’t want to talk about it again.”

Christian doesn’t say anything for a few very long seconds. He holds Toto in the same manner as before, his face mushed to the planes of his back, his body warm against Toto’s, over a decade of familiarity to the touch. Then he says, “You said.”

Toto’s face scrunches up in confusion, but he doesn’t move, just keeps staring down at the pan.

“You said you were sorry,” Christian clarifies. “For watching the video, or for what happened in Abu Dhabi?”

Toto’s chest smarts, pulls into a tight hard knot. “I don’t think… Let’s not talk about it again.”

“Because you’re uncomfortable?” Christian asks. “Or because you’re afraid I haven’t forgiven you yet?”

Toto doesn’t have an answer. The only thing he knows is that the eggs are burning. Christian doesn’t let him go but now his hold feels like it could crush Toto any second.

“I know you’re sorry,” Christian goes on. “And we’re past Abu Dhabi. Things are okay, yeah?”

Toto swallows hard. “Yes.”

Christian presses another kiss to his back, soothing this time. “Good. So why are you sorry?”

“I—” Christian doesn’t let him go. “I didn’t see you.” Toto’s voice breaks on the last syllable. “That night in Abu Dhabi. I was too concerned with other things, I didn’t watch the podium, I didn’t even leave the garage. So I didn’t know what you looked like that night until just fifteen minutes ago.” Heart in his throat he adds, “And I regret that. Not being there for it. Because you looked—”

Beautiful. Proud. Relieved. Real. Heartbreakingly authentic.

“I could’ve shared that with you, that night, the win, your success, but I didn’t. And I regret that. More than anything I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I wish I—” And now he’s fucking choking up.

“Oh.” Christian moves then, unfreezes and untangles himself from Toto’s back to turn him around by the hips. “Oh, darling, no, come on.”

Toto can’t look at him, but then again, he can’t really look at anything because tears are blurring his vision.

“No, darling, no, come here.” Christian wraps him up in a hug then, pulls him in, one arm wrapped around his middle, the other around his shoulders, and he presses the side of his face to Toto’s neck. “It’s okay. We’re past that.”

Toto doesn’t say anything. It doesn't feel like they’re past it. This is the first time he has allowed himself to cry about any of this in front of Christian. It’s been months, and it doesn’t feel like they’re past it.

“I know you would’ve been there if things had been different. But it was complicated, I know that. I’m not mad.”

“I’m mad,” Toto croaks, and as he says it, he realises it’s true. “I am so mad, Christian. I’m mad I didn’t get to share any of it with you. It was such a significant moment, and I wasn’t there with you. We won’t ever get that back.”

Christian takes a moment. “Okay,” he then says quietly. “Now I understand. I get it. I’m mad too.” Toto stills. “Not at you. At the whole thing, the circumstances leading up to it. It’s no one’s fault. We knew it would be difficult to keep things separate, and in the end, we didn’t manage. That’s okay. And it’s okay to be mad about it.”

“I’m not trying to bring it all back up again, I know we’re past it. It’s in the past.” Toto curls his arms around Christian’s back and pulls him in tighter, noses the side of his face, the imprint of the lines around his eyes. “I just didn’t realise how much I missed out that night. You looked so—”

“What?” Christian probes, curious.

“Sexy,” Toto croaks and there’s a second of silence before Christian breaks out into a loud, husky cackle.

“Are you— Toto, are crying because you didn’t get to fuck me that night?”

“Maybe.” Toto cracks a small grin and smothers it in Christian’s hair. They both know it’s more than that. But they also know there’s no way they can turn back time. What happened happened. It’s in the past.

“Oh fucking hell. You have no idea how badly I wanted you to be there that night.”

“Ja?”

“Yeah,” Christian says, and then he pulls back and looks Toto in the eyes and says, “Yes, darling. Of course I wanted you to be there with me. I wanted to—Look, I wanted to come and find you too, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. So I get it. I have regrets too.”

Toto has to pull him in again and Christian goes willingly, presses their foreheads together, noses brushing, and kisses Toto once more, deep. “I get it,” he murmurs to his lips. “But we’re okay, yeah?”

“Yes,” Toto agrees. Eyes closed. Christian smells like home. “Next time.”

“We’ll do so much better this year,” Christian agrees. “I’ll even let you spray me with champagne in front of everyone.”

Toto rolls his eyes, a small grin pulling stubbornly at the corners of his mouth. “You will let me, yes? That is very generous of you.”

“I know,” Christian agrees smugly. “You’re allowed to do it in front of everyone, too.”

“If you’re not careful, I will be doing something very different than shower you in champagne in front of everyone, darling.”

“Oh, don’t threaten me with a good time, darling.”

Toto hates him a little bit, his pleased smirk, the self-satisfaction, the green of his eyes twinkling, daring, his crow’s feet so deep, seven on the left, eleven on the right.

Toto doesn’t stand a chance. Not this season, but more importantly, not tonight either.

#since we were talking about growing pains today #i remembered this little snippet i wrote a while ago #lil bit of angsty hurt/comfort on a sunday night anyone?#old men yaoi etc #take this as a token of my affection and also catnip #seven years #growing pains #toto wolff #christian horner #christian/toto

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