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#got some mentionings of fandoms I'm in and gotten into recently
hannieehaee · 23 days
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ARE WE STILL FRIENDS
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18+ / mdi
summary: being besties with two of the most popular idols in korea always came with a few rumors here and there, but what happened when one of your platonic besties suddenly started acting a little friendlier than usual? or worse, what happened when they both turned their affections to you?
content: idol!au, hybeidol!reader x idol!mingyu, hybeidol!reader x idol!jungkook, 97liner!reader, friends2lovers, not mingyu x jk (they just share u like all besties would<3), not that much plot, afab reader, smut, oral (f and m receiving), body worship, fingering, penetrative sex, etc.
wc: 8.2k (10k+ including kofi/patreon exclusive drabble)
a/n: the teaser for this got way more attention than i was expecting lol i hope u guys enjoy the final product!!
masterlist | kofi/patreon
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"Do you think the company would get mad if we did a live together right now?", Jungkook pondered out loud as the three of you sat on different pieces of furniture around his large living room.
"Yeah."
"They didn't seem to mind when Jungkook and I did it that one time," disagreed Mingyu.
"Yeah, but I'm the girl. I'm the one who wakes up to new dating rumors every time we hang out publicly."
"Yeah, but people must know we're just friends by now, right? It's been years."
That much was true.
You weren't sure of the exact date, but your friendship with both boys predated the overall international success of Kpop as of recent years. When you had met both boys, they had barely battled their way through puberty – though you weren't faring any better at the time.
The media enjoyed making the three of you a subject, knowing that you were evidently the closest out of all members of the popular 97s friend group. Being the only girl integrant, it was common for people to have the misconception that you were romantically involved with either Mingyu or Jungkook, seeing as you were often spotted in public with them.
You'd gotten used to the rumors and hate that came attached to being their friend, now usually leaving those things in the back burner rather than letting them bother you. By now, the three of you were a bit more careless about being seen together. Being seniors in the industry, those things didn't matter much to you anymore, but being seen inside Jungkook's house would surely stir up the worst rumors to date, so going live with him was entirely out of the question.
It did bother you sometimes; the double standard. While Jungkook and Mingyu could even interact in public or mention each other freely, any time you did so you were met with hate from either fandom, sometimes even your own. It also made you worry about your future. Could you ever be in a relationship without facing the brunt of all the hate that would come your way? At 26 years of age, it was a frustrating reality to think about.
Jungkook got up at some point to go fetch some more bottles of soju. Apparently the seven bottles the three of you had drank collectively weren't enough for the large men you were drinking with.
While Jungkook was gone, Mingyu got up from his seat on the couch opposite to you and took a seat down next to you, invading your personal space like he usually did.
"Worrying your pretty little head about something?", asked Mingyu as he leaned over you, taking the occasional sip from his drink.
"It's nothing."
"C'mon, what's up?", his hand ran up and down your arm in a soothing manner.
Invading your space and being overly touchy usually meant that he was tipsy. But to be fair, you were a bit tipsy too.
"Do you ever think about dating?"
"Who? You?", he chuckled.
"No, dumbass. I mean in general."
He seemed to sober up a little at the mention of the subject, straightening up a bit as he sat sideways on the couch so he could look at you fully.
"What's got you thinking about that?"
"I don't know ... I'm 26 now. Isn't it time I started settling down? Have someone filling up the other half of the bed," you pondered, feeling a bit pathetic as you did so.
Mingyu let out a quiet sound of confusion, eyebrows furrowed and head leaning to the side in question.
"Isn't that what me and Jungkook are for?"
Not taking him seriously, you chuckled and took a swing of your almost empty bottle of soju.
"I'm serious, Mingyu. I mean a romantic relationship, where, you know, it's just us and we do couple things and we settle down and all that stuff."
"What can you do with some guy that you couldn't do with us?", he grabbed both your drinks and set them on the table.
Suddenly, his demeanor seemed a bit more serious, which confused you.
Where the hell was Jungkook with those drinks?
"I- Are you serious? Do you need me to tell you?"
"Yeah, I mean, why would you need to look for some guy if you have us?"
Oh. He was serious.
"Because we're friends?," you were beyond confused, "I can't go out with you romantically, or move in with you, or," you gulped, "or sleep with you."
"You can't?", he scoot closer to you.
"Mingyu ..."
"I just mean ... Why would you go after some loser when we can just take care of you?", his hand went back to touching you, though this time it ran up and down your thigh rather than your arm. That false semblance of innocence was gone, "You want someone to keep your bed warm? You don't even have to ask ... I'll do it- we'll do it."
Through his short speech, he got closer and closer, just as the air in the room got heavier. The atmosphere itself shifted dramatically, specially with Mingyu so close to you.
Mingyu was the touchiest man you'd ever known. Being his best friend, you had fallen victim to his touchy demeanor endless times, but never like this. Never while his eyes were hooded and heavy with some emotion you'd never seen in them before.
"Gyu, I-"
"Can I show you?", he rasped, eyes now on your lips.
"Y-you're drunk," you were sure that must've been it. The combination between drinking and talking about dating must've short circuited his brain.
"Just tipsy ... Tipsy enough to get the balls to tell you how much I want you ... but lucid enough to remember how many times I've thought about this."
The hands on your thighs moved to your waist, closing in on you, slowly pulling you toward him. By the end of it, you were halfway sitting on his lap.
"You've thought about this?"
Your nervous hands went to his shoulders for support, easily giving in to him.
"So many times. Jungkook too," he chuckled as he began burying his head in your neck, lips ghosting the sensitive skin.
Lacking any control of your body, you repositioned yourself to allow him better access to you, now fully on his lap as he sat sideways on the couch, arms wrapped fully around you and face buried in your neck.
"Gyu, I-"
"Yeah? Is this okay? Is it okay if I kiss your neck like this? This is what you wanted, right? Someone to take care of you?", he mumbled as he made his way to your ear with breathy kisses.
You were burning up, completely powerless to Mingyu. It was kind of embarrassing how easily you gave in to him. How you had been entirely unaware of his want for you until five minutes ago, yet you were now pliant in his hold, willing to listen to his senseless argument about him and Jungkook being good replacement for a relationship. You also had that to think about – the Jungkook aspect of it all.
The reminder of Jungkook's presence woke you up a bit, remembering that you were literally sitting on your best friend's lap while in your other best friend's living room.
With half a mind to let Mingyu do whatever he wanted to do with you, you powered your way through your decision to pull him away from your neck.
"Gyu, wait. Kook could get here any minute-"
"Don't stop on my account. Seemed like you were having fun without me."
Your head snapped to the door at the introduction of the raspy voice of your best friend, finding said friend leaning against the doorframe with a few drinks in one hand and a few ramen cups stacked on the other.
"Jungkook-"
"So, can someone catch me up?", he got closer, dropping off all the food he was carrying on the table and sitting next to you on the couch.
The position made it so that Jungkook was technically sitting behind you. Since you were on Mingyu's lap and sitting sideways on the couch, you were now being sandwiched by both boys. Jungkook still kept a small distance, making you have to turn around in Mingyu's hold to look at him.
While you probably embodied the image of a deer caught in headlights, Mingyu seemed completely relaxed, hands still comfortably on your waist.
"I was actually just catching Y/N up," said Mingyu, an overly cocky tone in his voice as his hands continued to feel up and down your waist.
"Oh? Without me?", chuckled Jungkook, leaning a bit closer.
"What the hell is happening?"
"How much did you tell her?", Jungkook ignored you, staring directly at Mingyu. His eyes would occasionally trail down to Mingyu's hands on your waist, a sour look overtaking his face.
It seemed like you had missed a few chapters in the friendship; there was some unspoken agreement between the two in which you were the main character. While it bothered you to think that they'd discussed you in private, the enigma of it all also excited you. Maybe it was the alcohol in your system, or maybe it was the way in which Mingyu's entire demeanor had become possessive when you brought up dating. The reason didn't matter when you were already beginning to heat up.
"Just caught her up a little on the, uh, situation," said Mingyu with an unrecognizable glint in his eyes, "Did you know she was thinking about dating?", he asked Jungkook, ignoring your presence while still having his hands on you.
Mingyu's hand had made it under your shirt by now, feeling the warm skin of your back.
"Oh? Since when?", he finally turned to you, scooting up a tiny bit more.
Due to his new proximity, you turned your head around, facing Mingyu again. That proved to be a mistake, as Mingyu was even closer to you. Jungkook also took advantage of this, braving a few more inches in closeness and letting his face come closer to your neck. He pushed your hair aside for better access, simply breathing against you as he awaited your answer.
Responding was the hardest thing in the world. Your mind was simply not working at the moment, the situation being far too intimate for you to fully function. On one side you had the huge hunk of a man that was Mingyu, warm hands against the bare skin of your back all while you sat on his leg. On the other, you had the gorgeous embodiment of a boyfriend that was Jungkook, whose fingers were now slowly running up and down your arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake while he nosed at your neck.
You had your two gorgeous best friends giving you the best type of attention all while your brain fizzled with your tipsiness.
"Answer him, baby," murmured Gyu.
"I- I just," you sighed when Jungkook began leaving feather-light kisses on your neck, "just thought about maybe getting b-back in the market? To meet someone and-"
"But you have us?", Jungkook sounded genuinely confused, seemingly unable to understand the platonic nature behind your friendship.
"That's what I said!", added Mingyu.
"But I want a boyfriend, n-not-"
"Boyfriend? Baby ...", Jungkook disconnected from you, grabbing your head to make you twist your neck in order to look at him, "That's just an upgrade. You want a boyfriend? We'll give you two. You don't need to be looking around for some loser," his eyes gradually lowered to your lips as he spoke, breath heavy against them.
"K-Kook, I-"
"Please say yes? Please just ... Let me show you? We can show you together. Right, Gyu?", he murmured, mere inches away from your mouth.
Before you knew it, you were nodding, far too desperate to voice your desire.
As embarrassing as it was to admit, you had thought of kissing Jungkook before. Being one of the prettiest boys you'd ever seen before, it was hard at first to keep your relationship with him fully platonic, having had to beat down a small crush you had developed on him at an earlier age. His kiss, however, was not something you could've ever predicted.
Even with the awkward angle, and Mingyu's hands still on you, Jungkook gave you the dizziest of kisses. He knew how to get you hooked immediately, starting with a heavy kiss that had you chasing him the moment he pulled away. With a quiet and breathy laugh, he kissed you again, languid and wet in the way his tongue snuck between your lips, seamlessly making its way into your mouth to play with yours.
Shamelessly, you moaned against his lips, hands digging into Mingyu's shoulders as he continued to hold you. The slight awkwardness of making out with Jungkook while giving your back to Mingyu, yet still holding onto him, was present in your mind. However, Jungkook's sensual yet playful way of kissing you took up most of your attention.
But you knew Mingyu to be a whiny mess of a man at times, so you knew it wouldn't be long before he attempted to regain your attention. The evidence was in the way he felt you up all throughout, hands on your breasts as he pinched at your nipples through your shirt, groaning at the feeling of your tits in his hands. Occasionally, his hands would go down to your cunt, ghosting the place where you needed the most attention before making their way back up to your chest.
Pulling you away by the waist, you were forced to separate from Jungkook, eyes still closed as your lips chased his own. This time Jungkook's lips also attempted to regain possession over yours, with his tongue catching a few last nasty licks of your own.
"It's my turn," grumbled Mingyu, making you turn back to him, "You're on my lap but kiss him only? Baby, we're supposed to share you!", he pouted.
Giggling, you got even closer to him, cradling his head in your hands as you lightly pulled at his hair.
You turned to Jungkook one quick last time, "Kookie?"
His eyes lit up at your question, giving you a view of his round eyes as he gave you his full attention.
"Scoot closer, yeah? Put your hands around me," you encouraged him, humming in contentment when he went above and beyond and began to kiss your neck in the process.
Turning back to Mingyu, there was still an ever-so-present pout on his features, making you giggle again before finally kissing his lips.
Now, Mingyu's kiss was completely different from that of Jungkook's.
You had known Mingyu for as much time as you had Jungkook. He had a bit of a reputation when you had first met, being known as a guy who would occasionally sleep around with other idols, and sometimes staff. Now at 26, he had been retired from that era of his life for a while, but you'd be lying if you didn't say he always made you wonder. He always had all the girls swooning, instantly falling in love with his outgoing persona and his incomparable charisma. His looks also did not help matters. Being so handsome and likable, you occasionally fell victim to his charms, sometimes needing to snap yourself out of R rated thoughts you'd have about him on nights you were feeling particularly lonely.
His kiss felt exactly the way he looked. It was rich and insanely hot. Mingyu made love to your mouth, using his tongue in ways you didn't know a man could. He was domineering in the way he kissed you, with a firm hand on your jaw so he could position you in a way that allowed him to kiss you just the way he liked. And he liked it nasty. He liked it wet and filthy and in a way that made you sure you'd cum if he kissed you for a little too long.
You could barely catch up to the situation, having one gorgeous man fucking your mouth with his tongue while the other suckled at the most sensitive spots of your neck. In the meantime, your cunt was gushing with essence, already so extremely wet you were beginning to squirm in Mingyu's hold.
You attempted to pull away once, only to be enticed into kissing Mingyu again as he groaned against you, tongue seducing yours once more. You attempted to pull away twice, having his arms wrap tighter around you. The third time is when you finally succeeded, whining against Mingyu's mouth that you needed more. This caused yet another groan to come out of Mingyu, only to be echoed by Jungkook's own groan against your neck.
They both disconnected from you, looking to each other in a decisive manner, almost as if to formulate a game plan.
"I want her first," said Jungkook, slapping Mingyu's hands away from you and attempting to move you onto his lap.
Mingyu stopped him, holding you tighter against him as he rebutted, "You? She's already on my lap. I should have her first."
"Dude, I'm about to blow up. Just let me fuck her and then you can have her while I recover," be argued, hands fighting Mingyu's off of you.
"Why can't I choose?", you butt in, annoyed.
Their demeanors swiftly changed at your interruption, both pairs of hands now touching either your waist or thighs in an intimate yet caring manner.
"What do you want, pretty? My cock? Hmm?", asked Mingyu with a sweet voice in an attempt to convince you. Meanwhile, Jungkook wordlessly kissed at your neck again, nibbling at your ear and smirking at how you shuddered at the feeling.
"I-", you were already lightheaded again, "I wanna suck your dick, Gyu. Want Kookie to fuck me while I suck your dick," you murmured, hand holding Jungkook's head against your neck to keep his kisses coming.
Mingyu groaned at this, nodding absentmindedly. He began to shift, attempting to get up in order to get himself ready for you, but you stopped him.
"Undress me? Both of you?", you asked in the softest voice you could muster. You wanted both their hands on you at once, feeling your nude body for the first time. You knew their desire for you was already clouding their minds, so you wanted to do everything in your power to relish in every single touch, every look filled with lust they would give you.
Without another word, both boys got up, standing you up with them. Their hands were messy and uncoordinated as they got every garment off you, feeling you up in the process. Your breasts were groped and fondled multiple times in the process, while Jungkook pressed your ass up against him any chance he could, groaning at the slight stimulation.
Finally undressed, you decided to turn around once more, facing Jungkook as you kissed him with no warning. You smirked into his mouth when you felt Mingyu grab you from behind and press your ass up against him, grinding slowly against you. You knew it wasn't enough to get him anywhere, but you enjoyed knowing he was needy enough to use you in such a fruitless way just for a little stimulation.
Meanwhile, your hands went straight to Jungkook's oversized top, hands sneaking underneath to feel up his muscular form, hands harshly rubbing on his strong chest. It seemed Jungkook was overly sensitive to your touch. He whined needy breaths into your mouth as you felt him up. Taking off his shirt, you moaned as you saw the gorgeous figure of your best friend.
God, he was the prettiest thing you'd ever seen. You couldn't wait until you saw the rest of his pretty body, sculpted by the endless hours of work you knew he always put into the gym. The endless hours in which you had accompanied him to said gym, always having to look away before you started to have inpure thoughts of your best friend.
He helped you in the removing of his pants and boxers, throwing his head back when your hands immediately went to find his cock and play with it. Burying his head in your neck, he groaned against your skin, whining at the feeling of your hands finally wrapped around him after having wanted you for so long.
Behind you, you heard shuffling, assuming Mingyu to have been removing his own clothes as he waited for his turn of your attention to come. You felt badly at leaving him hanging for too long, knowing him to have an overly impatient disposition when he didn't receive attention for extended periods of time.
Playing with Jungkook's cock just for a little longer, you gave him one last kiss before turning around and trapping Mingyu in his own kiss. Unlike with Jungkook, you didn't linger long, opting instead to push him down the large conversation pit – thank god for Jungkook's insanely big mansion – located just a few steps away from the couch where it had all begun. This way you could have all the space you wanted to play with your friends.
Now lying down, Mingyu looked you up and down like you were his next prey, licking his lips at the sight and motioning at you to come sit on him despite knowing that you wanted something else.
"C'mon, baby. Ditch him. Don't you want me instead?," he leaned upwards to try and convince you of sitting on him.
It was hard to deny him with his cock staring up at you in such a challenging manner. He was equally as gorgeous as your other bestie, but in so many different ways. Mingyu was so big and thick and buff, he had you salivating at the mere sight of him. He was so toned yet so thick, and his dick matched perfectly. God, the thought of that monster inside you had your eyes rolling back already. Did he really mean it when he said he'd be yours? That he and Jungkook would share you? The idea of a boyfriend sounded stupid in retrospect.
Despite all your better judgment telling you to jump Mingyu and let him impale you with his cock right then and there, you knew that starting off with Jungkook would give you a better buildup. You also knew that based on Jungkook's competitive personality, he'd become even whinier than Mingyu if you didn't let him take care of you first.
Fully determined, you turned back to Jungkook, who had been standing there in a trance, now having a better view of your body and keeping his eyes religiously glued to it. You grabbed onto him and walked yourself back to the large conversation pit, eyes glued to Jungkook's in a seductive manner as you guided him to the area in which Mingyu was already lying down. In only a few seconds, you let go of Jungkook and positioned yourself in front of Mingyu at an eye level with his cock while he sat up and looked down at you with a pained look in his eyes. In all fours, your back faced Jungkook, hinting at him to get behind you so that you could finally get back to business.
With a groan, Jungkook knelt behind you, needy hands feeling the curve of your back as he pushed you up against him. In the meantime, you began softly playing with Mingyu's cock, making him throw his head back at finally receiving some attention where he'd been craving it for so long.
"You're so pretty, fuck ... No one deserves you, baby. Too fucking pretty n perfect n fuck ... Can I fuck you now, pretty? Hmm? Let me have this pretty pussy while you suck off your bestie," rambled Jungkook from behind you, head lowered so he could kiss at your hips.
You whined and pushed up your ass against him, giving him the green light to do whatever he wanted, when suddenly he stopped.
"Fuck, wait. Condom?", he asked, making Mingyu groan, as you were about to engulf him in your mouth but also halted your movements to tend to Jungkook's question.
"It's okay, Kookie. The company put me on some new birth control. You can fuck me raw," you smirked up at Mingyu, giggling at yet another groan of his.
"He gets you raw? Baby, I'm the one who started all this! How's that fair?", he huffed.
Taking a quick separation from Jungkook, you gestured for Mingyu to lean down so he could meet you halfway. With a wet kiss, you made your way to his ear and whispered against it.
"I'm saving you for last, baby. Gonna ride you til I cry ... Now be good and cum in my mouth?"
He groaned so loudly his entire body vibrated under you as you crawled your way back to your previous position. Jungkook simply laughed at the interaction.
Feeling you up once more, Jungkook finally grabbed onto his cock and lined himself up, groaning at the gushing wetness that coated his cock as he entered you. Your own moan was masked by Mingyu's cock, which you were currently working into your mouth.
"Oh, fuck ... It's so tight, baby ... It's so fuckin' warm n tight n so pretty, baby. Such a pretty cunt," babbled Jungkook, immediately pussydrunk.
Could he be blamed? He had wanted you for years. From the moment he met you, he cursed at himself for being so damn shy and initiating a friendship with you rather than showing you his interest. His members constantly teased him over it, even so many years into his crush. When he first found out Mingyu also had similar ideas in mind, he felt conflicted. But he ultimately grew close enough to the two of you to the point where he wouldn't mind sharing you with his bestest of friends.
Your muffled moans completely took him out of it, taking away any ability to think or speak. He simply chased after you with his hips, canting them against your own as you pushed back against him.
"Is it good, pretty? Like my cock?" he winced at the way you tightened any time he'd speak to you.
"So good, Kookie. So big ...," you pulled away from Mingyu to breathe before going back to licking and sucking at his tip, moaning against him as his eyes rolled back.
You were practically centipede in Jungkook's living room, with Mingyu lying on his back as you gagged on his cock and Jungkook pounding into you from behind. All your senses were overtaken by the mindless quest for pleasure you had all taken on.
"You're so good with your mouth, pretty ... Fuck, look so pretty stuffed of cock," Mingyu gasped, throwing his head back, "Like how he fucks you, baby? Just wait til I get to you ... Gonna stuff that pretty pussy so good ..."
You moaned against his cock, already thirsty for him even as Jungkook continued to ram into you. Pushing your ass back against him, you felt Jungkook's nails dig into the skin of your hips, adoring how malleable you were for him.
"Baby ... 'm gonna cum soon ... Feels so fucking good, pretty. You're so fucking g-good for me. Wanted you so fuckin' bad, you have no idea ..." murmured Jungkook as he entered his high, hips lacking any control in their movements.
Jungkook had always been the most sensible of the bunch, never holding back from expressing how strongly he felt for the people in his life. The pleasure must've been so much that it made him unfiltered in revealing the undeniable effect you had on him.
"W-where do I cum? Fuck, gonna fucking cum, it's so good, baby. Take it so good for me, shit ..."
You were too busy gagging on cock to respond right away, so you had to take a minute to pull away and catch your breath, replacing your mouth with your hand while also holding yourself up with the other one.
"Inside? Cum inside, Kookie. I'll- I'll cum too," you were breathless, barely able to get the words out as a petulant Mingyu whined at you to help him finish, hands going behind your head and lightly encouraging you to get your mouth back on him.
"Inside? Fuck, okay, baby. Gonna fill you up, yeah?", he groaned, muttering to himself right afterwards, "Fucking finally ..."
His hips sped up drastically as his high approached, making you choke around Mingyu not just due to his girth, but due to the intense ramming against your ass. Though harsh and with an unmatchable energy, you continued to try and push your hips back toward his own, wanting to milk him dry as your own high invaded your senses.
His desperation for you made you feel so incredibly good, like you were the prettiest girl to ever exist. It made you arch your back a little deeper, take a little more of Gyu's cock, dig your nails a little harsher into the cushion of the conversation pit. You heightened all your actions just to feel him a little more.
And then it reached its crescendo. All while Jungkook whimpered and cried at how sensitive he felt at your tightening walls, Mingyu also found his own high. You were too distracted with your own orgasm to acknowledge him asking you for permission to cum in your mouth, instead suctioning more intensely to wordlessly give him an enthusiastic yes, please fill up my mouth with your cum.
By the time Mingyu filled up your mouth, Jungkook had already finished his high, now kneeling behind you as he peppered kisses all over your back and hips, whispering against you how good you had been for him and how pretty you looked with his cum leaking out of you. Fully drunk on the aftermath of his high, Jungkook loved on you like any lover would.
In the meantime, you attempted to swallow every bit of Mingyu's essence, moaning against his cock afterwards as you licked at every lone drop that made it out of your mouth.
By the end of it, you were all completely spent. Each of you dropped one by one, with Jungkook lying on his back as he caught his breath, you falling onto Mingyu, and Mingyu attempting to pull you up to climb his body so that he could kiss you again.
With the very little energy you had regained, you crawled up Mingyu's body, making out with him as he attempted to lick his way into your mouth in order to taste himself in your mouth. Kissing evolved into feeling each other up, which then became grinding your now sensitive pelvises against each other. Surprisingly, Mingyu was still half-hard, which gave you the perfect surface to grind your cunt into. He sat up, making you sit up with him before beginning to leave kisses on the side of your neck.
"Baby? Gonna ride me like you said, right? Just .. Fuck, want that pretty pussy, baby. It's my turn to have that tiny little cunt wrapped around me, yeah?", he murmured between kisses.
You gave in to him easily, gasping at every word that accompanied every kiss.
Nodding mindlessly, you almost forgot to think back to Jungkook, who was probably still recovering from his orgasm.
"W-what about Kookie?," you mumbled when Mingyu began positioning you above his cock.
"Don't worry about me, pretty. Just enjoying the view", you turned back to see Jungkook lying back on his elbows, one hand on his semi-flacid cock as he began to work himself up at the sight of you sitting on your best friend.
Well, that worked well enough for you.
"Now pay attention to me, princess. Been ignoring me all day today," Mingyu grabbed onto your chin to make you look at him, thumb softly rubbing at your chin as he tilted your head back.
You were insanely wet by now, not only from your orgasm but also from just Mingyu's mere presence. Knowing how intense and touchy Mingyu always was in PG scenarios, you couldn't help your eyes rolling back at the thought of him between the sheets. His heavy cock on your tongue had been enough of a taste to know how good it'd feel when finally inside you.
His strong hands lifted you up a bit, rescuing his dick from under you as he helped you position it under you, holding tightly onto your hips when you began to lower yourself down. You would've moaned and whined at the immense stretch, but Mingyu had different plans for your mouth. His thick fingers slipped into your mouth, making you gag a bit before you began sucking on them.
Too many things were on your mind, with all your senses being invaded by Mingyu – though also accompanied by Jungkook's low moans of pleasure behind you. Even as your body was bouncing against Mingyu's, attempting to match his thrusts, your head was completely empty of any thought. All you could think about was Mingyu, and his cock, and his fingers, and his pretty body, and and and-
"Feel good, princess? Love my cock, hmm? Tell me how much you like my cock, angel," he groaned as he took his fingers out of your mouth, using the wet fingertips to tweak at your nipple as his mouth engulfed the opposite one.
"So much ... It's so big. Fuck, Gyu, you're s-so big ..."
Barely able to formulate words, you cried as Mingyu helped you bounce on him, occasionally opting to grind in a way that made your clit get the perfect stimulation. It all felt too good. Mingyu's gigantic hands on your body while his lips suckled on your tits as Jungkook groaned so prettily behind you. You were far too sensitive and alert to hold back from the life-altering orgasm that was to come. So, you voiced this concern to Mingyu.
His response came in the form of flipping you around and trapping you underneath him. His big hands held onto your waist, lifting you a bit so he could angle himself just right. Eyes rolling back and nails digging onto the bed, you lost yourself in him. Jungkook seemed to be completely lost to pleasure also. You could finally see him after Mingyu flipped you over, and fuck ... He looked so desperate, so depraved in the way he hammered into his cock, mouth permanently agape as he let out little praises to you.
"I need you to cum for me, okay, princess? Show Jungkook how good I make you feel. Need you to milk me dry, yeah? Can you do that for me?", he dumbly talked down at you with a tone that could only be seen as patronizing in any other context. But here, you loved it. You loved how dumbly he treated you. Because it was true. You could not think, you could not speak. Your senses were all gone and replaced by a constant stream of cock cock cock as Mingyu finally made you reach your orgasm.
Mingyu played with you through the entirety of your orgasm, rubbing at your clit with one hand while holding you with the other, his lips constantly attached to your tits.
"G-gyu, I- fuck! C-cumming! Please, I-" you had no idea what you were begging for as your orgasm completely took over, making you tighten around Mingyu as he mumbled into your chest, letting you know of his own impending high.
Despite having already had an equally fulfilling orgasm, this second one brought out a new sensitivity in you. Falling under Mingyu, you whimpered at the way he flipped you over again to lay on his chest, caressing your back and pressed you up against him, even more when Jungkook laid beside you and softly ran his hands through your hair.
The three of you laid there together, with you halfway laying on Mingyu while Jungkook laid on the opposite side of you, cuddling into you. Behind you, you could feel Jungkook's flacid member, meaning he had also reached a second high along with you and Mingyu. Lying there together, completely sober now, you eventually let sleep take over you, nuzzling into both boys in a satisfied manner.
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A few days passed by since your encounter with the 97s. They were pretty eventful as far as your job went, attending a few photoshoots and practicing constantly for whatever new activity was coming up for your group. However, things between you and your friends had remained stagnant. You didn't think they had ghosted you or anything like that, but the timing of your busy schedules picking up right after breaking your platonic relationship did make you anxious.
When you'd woken up that next day, Mingyu was gone, having left one of the packs of ramen cooked and ready for you with a note attached detailing how much he enjoyed last night, saying he had wanted to stay and say goodbye but had a a schedule that had been calling for him. It was signed with his name and a little heart.
Jungkook had been half-awake already, having carried you to his bed when he had woken up, right after Mingyu's departure. You had wanted to talk about last night, but also had a schedule over at the company, so you left after cuddling with a sleepy Jungkook for a short while, not really discussing anything, yet sharing a sweet kiss as a goodbye for the day.
And so you hadn't really seen them since then. It was the unfortunate reality of idol life. That night had been the first in a few weeks in which you'd even been able to see each other. You were unsure when the next one would come, but you needed it to be soon. The remembrance of that night kept messing with your head, especially any time you'd see either of your friends in passing at the Hybe building, never being free long enough for a worthy interaction.
On the fourth night since the incident, you finally had more time off for yourself, hoping maybe they did too. Mingyu got ahead of you in that aspect, texting you the previous night, somehow aware of your time off, and asking you over. There was no deeper interpretation to be had in his message, as it was pretty straightforward. Nervous as to whether to expect a repeat of last time or a conversation about it, you let him know you'd be there.
Jungkook and Mingyu had always been closer to each other than to you. Going out together was always easier for them since no scandalous rumors would arise from it. They were also often in the same friend groups, knowing more male idols than you did due to the nature of the industry. It was easy for you to assume that they had already spoken about what had happened, even before it happened. Throughout the night, they kept referencing some type of agreement they'd had regarding you and dating. It was hard to assume, but you wondered if they meant sharing you – as strange as it sounded.
Your questions would only be answered tonight, leading you to some anxiety before finally arriving to Mingyu's.
~
"I missed you," were Mingyu's first words when he welcomed you, trapping you in a warm hug as he usually did. Hugging Mingyu was, in your opinion, one of your life's greatest privileges. He was so big and strong, it always felt like being completely engulfed in the safest of spaces.
His hug was followed by one of Jungkook's, less tight in nature but just as rewarding. He held onto your waist and nuzzled against you, always attempting to bury himself in whoever he held in his arms.
Quietly, they guided you to Mingyu's living room, slightly smaller than Jungkook's but still very much reminiscent of a millionaire's home.
You looked over to the coffee table, tilting your head in confusion at the presence of cans of diet soda rather than the usual alcohol Mingyu would always provide. Sensing your confusion, Mingyu chuckled.
"No alcohol today. Thought you might wanna talk about what happened," he sat down on the couch, patting the empty space next to him so you'd join him. Behind to you, Jungkook joined, sitting on a lone seat facing you and Mingyu. No matter where you looked, the two boys would be in front of you.
"We've been keeping you in the dark, huh?," pondered Jungkook, handing you a freshly opened can of soda, "Sorry about that. No easy way to tell your best friend you're into her."
Oh. He was going straight to the point.
"I like you, if that wasn't clear already," he let out a breathless chuckle, attempting to hold eye contact but failing.
He was much better at this when he was working his way into your pants.
"And so do I," interrupted Mingyu.
Wait.
"Are you-"
"We both like you."
"I- Have you talked about this?"
"Uh, it's come up, yeah," Mingyu scratched the back of his neck.
"I don't really know what to say ..."
"We just ... You had fun the other night, right?"
"Yeah, I mean, it was great," you took a breath, "but we're friends. Right?"
You weren't sure if you were being rational or not. Did you like Mingyu and Jungkook? Sure. But together? At the same time? You had never considered such type of relationship.
"We- we don't have to be just friends," added Jungkook, not much confidence in his voice. He cleared his throat and tried again, "We like you, and we know that you like us back. Maybe not in the same way, but you do. That night would've gone very differently if you didn't."
You could've lied. You could've lied and left it off as an amazing one night stand with your two best friends. But the thought of never feeling what you felt that night ever again was not something you wanted to risk. It wasn't just about the pleasure. You had meant what you said that night; you wanted a stable relationship. You wanted someone to call a best friend, but be more than that. Someone to hold you at night. The three of you had always been glued by the hip, but you had never really thought of what it'd be like to take the next step – to have them be that person (or those people).
There were just too many questions in your head. Would this change your relationship negatively? Would they actually want to share you? Would this go anywhere?
You opted for answering Jungkook's question with another question.
"Are you okay with both of you liking me?"
They looked at each other for a moment before Mingyu ultimately answered.
"We've discussed it," he started, "When we first realized we both liked you, it did cause some tension. But the closer we got to you, the more we realized that we just wanted to be with you. Whether as friends or as more, we just wanted you."
You gulped at the confession, feeling your face heating up all of the sudden.
"I- I don't know what to say, I- I like you too. Both of you. I always thought that it was just as friends, but ... there'd be moments where I'd wonder. And after that night, I just-"
Jungkook leaned forwards, grabbing onto your hands. He smiled, ignoring most of your words and paying attention to what he cared about the most – you liked him.
"You like me back? Us? Do you- We could treat you so right. I- I've wanted you since we met. I've liked you for so long and ... Not just for sex. We could be more," his words were slightly frantic in nature, almost as if he wanted to sell something to you.
He didn't need any selling. You liked him. It became more and more glaring by the minute.
"Nothing has to change. We've been friends for this long. Just ... That guy you're looking for? To settle down with? That could be us," added Mingyu, placing a palm on your thigh for reassurance.
"What happens if I say yes?"
Mingyu's eyes grew dark.
"Do you want the PG version?"
You shook your head, mouth agape as you looked to Mingyu.
His face lit up as he leaned closer and closer to you, lips approaching the sensitive spots he had discovered on your neck just a few days ago. Stopping for just one moment, he looked to Jungkook to gesture he sit opposite of you, making you become sandwiched by both men yet again.
Now with both boys kissing down your neck, you allowed your head to rest against the back of the couch, attempting to fight the shudders escaping your body at the sensation.
"As our girlfriend ... we'd take you on dates," Mingyu sucked at a particularly sensitive spot, licking at it afterwards, "buy you pretty gifts, keep you warm at night," he took a pause, licking up the length of your neck, "take care of you every day."
Jungkook continued from where Mingyu left off, leaving soft whispers of kisses under your ear, "We share you. We take you home, cook for you, protect you," he nipped at your lobe, "We love you like no one else could ever imagine."
By now, you were gone. Through their whispered promises, their hands had decided to intrude your space yet again. Jungkook's had found a home between your legs, running up your skirt and gracing at your cunt, but only enough to have you puffing out breaths of desire. Mingyu's had migrated upwards, lowering the straps of your dress and liberating your breasts, hands needy as they pulled and tweaked at your nipples.
"What do you say, princess?", Mingyu pulled away, lips reaching your own, "Wanna have two boyfriends?", he pecked at your lips sensually.
"Mhmm ...", you nodded pathetically, not trusting your voice.
Jungkook groaned at your answer, hand finally slipping inside your panties, "Good girl ..."
"Fuck, gonna treat you so good, gorgeous," said Mingyu, continuing to kiss at your lips tongue seeking your own.
His lips trailed down to your breasts, sensually licking at your nipples, gradually giving them more and more attention. By the end of it, you were crying at the sensitivity.
Jungkook continued to play with your cunt, driving his fingers through your folds at a rhythmic pace that made your hips take a mind of their own, grinding upwards with a complete lack of coordination.
You were so focused on Jungkook's fingers that you didn't notice Mingyu making his way down your body, now kneeling between your legs as his lips made their way up your thighs, marking them to his heart's contentment.
"So fucking pretty ... Been wanting your pretty thighs around my head for years, princess ...", he mumbled to himself, nosing his way towards your cunt. When he finally arrived, he nudged Jungkook's finger's away, sticking his nose against your cunt as he took a shameless whiff of your scent, groaning gruttaly against you.
"So good ... Fuck, need this pretty cunt so bad. Can I have it, baby? Hmm? Let me have a taste of this pretty pussy?" he asked between depraved licks of your cunt through your panties.
Hiccuping back a sob, you nodded, opening your legs wider as you took a hold of Jungkook's hand for support.
Needing no further confirmation, Mingyu went straight into your cunt, ignoring the obstacle of your panties by pushing them aside. In the meantime, Jungkook's hand went to your chin, turning your whiny lips to his own and giving you a languid kiss. His tongue played with your own, taking advantage of your constant cries of pleasure to suck at your tongue and bite your lips as much as he desired.
Your hands went from holding onto Jungkook for support to his pants, undoing the drawstring as he continued to kiss you. With shaky hands, you snuck your hands in, pulling out his hardened cock as you began to jerk it in your hand. Now you were even; equally pathetic cries being released into each other's mouths as you both chased your highs.
Beneath you, you almost missed the way Mingyu's hips began humping against the couch, groans being released into your cunt due to the stimulation. You were far too distraed by kissing Jungkook, but Mingyu's eyes were rolled all the way back as his hips became uncontrollable, cumming in his boxers just moments before he licked you to completion.
Even as you came, Mingyu's lips didn't leave your cunt, just as yours stayed on Jungkook's. The room was a mess of wet sounds of tongues as Mingyu finally separated himself from you to take a breath.
"Prettiest fucking cunt," he mumbled to himself as he let himself lay on the floor of his living room in exhaustion.
"C-cum! 'm gonna cum ...", Jungkook managed to mumble against your lips, attempting to pull back but being enticed by your lips to continue kissing. Your hands sped up at his warning, warning his pretty seed to coat your hands as he reached his nirvana.
With a last groan, Jungkook froze against you while riding his high, hips pathetic in their movements against your hand. Bringing up your hand to your lips, you made a show of licking the remnants of cum, grinning when you beard a unison of groans from both boys.
Out of breath, Jungkook leaned against you, cuddling into you with a satisfied yet smile.
"So, was that a yes?"
Mingyu made his way to the couch again, taking up the last bit of personal space you had.
You chuckled.
"Yes. That was a yes."
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to read short 2.7k word continuation (+ all other previously written bonus content) you can go join my monthly tier on kofi or patreon!
content: smut, oral (f receiving), jerking off, cucking, penetrative sex, reunion sex, etc.
wc: 296 (teaser); 2770 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
"Fuck, missed you so much. You have no idea," whispered Jungkook against your neck.
After having cornered you in one of Hybe's many endless hallways, Jungkook had grabbed you by the hand and led you to an empty changing room, pushing you up against the door and burying his face in your neck. It was mostly innocent, sans the feathery kisses down your neck. His hands were still in appropriate places.
"I was only gone for a month," you giggled against him.
"A month too long. Do you know how annoying Mingyu gets when you're not around? Jesus Christ," he groaned in mock annoyance, refusing to separate from your neck.
Breathing you in, he hummed, arms wrapping impossibly tighter around you.
"Where is he, by the way?"
"What, not enough attention from one of your boyfriends?", he softly bit at your neck in defiance, licking at the mark he left when you jumped in surprise.
"No! Just ... Missed seeing you two together."
After only a month of entering a romantic relationship, you were embarrassed to admit, but you had become quite needy, always wanting them around. This had led to a few problems within your company, which was blissfully unaware of your three-way relationship, but still had to deal with how much closer you had gotten – especially in public. There had been a few more rumors as of late, though none actually traced back to anything credible.
"He's at the gym. Should be here any minute, though, since he knows you're back."
"Hmm," you hummed, disconnecting him from your neck despite his complaints, "Wanna start without him?" you grinned.
With a boyish nod and a peak of his bunny teeth, the pretty boy agreed, dragging you over to one of the empty couches in the room.
...
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Hi , miss Raven
Their is something has been on my mind for while ;
In rook suitor suit vignette he Compose a flattering poem about Crowley
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While Ace and Epel was talking about how rook would compliment anyone , rook insisted that he mean every word he say .
And there's this specific weird line
"if it weren't for your presence , I wouldn't be here"
Like what do you mean?????!!
Do you think this line is hinting at the fact that rook didn't join NRC via traditional way or he wasn't chosen by the dark mirror , since he is one of the light trio
Or To the fact that he transferred to another dorm smoothly without any problem?
For some reason I started suspecting rook recently 😭
The fact he was one of the reason vil overbloted by convincing him to watch neige performance and also he is the one who convinced vil to add Ace and deuce as part of VDC team while I thought lilia and cater was a better option
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I would like to hear your opinion about it 👀
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Ah, so if I'm understanding you correctly... You're theorizing that Rook might be an outside agent of some kind? One that Crowley intentionally brought into NRC to facilitate triggering overblots??
I’ll try to respond to one question at a time; hopefully this will make it easier to follow along! The post got quite long, so it's all below the cut~
Beginning with Rook’s poem, and, more specifically, “If it weren’t for your presence, I wouldn’t be here”. It’s funny that you mention this line, because when the vignette first came out (in JP; the terminology used is similar to “I would not exist/be here”), people interpreted it VERY literally. As in… “Rook is Crowley’s son because he literally could not be conceived without a father! They’re even both named after birds! They have to at least be blood related somehow!” Strange how in 2020, Crowley was suspected of being Rook’s father but now in 2024 Crowley’s being suspected of being Malleus’s father. The poor headmaster just can’t catch a break 😂
Personally, I don’t think that line is implying anything strange about Rook’s enrollment. As far as we know, he did not join NRC though any abnormal means, and nor did Silver. Of the “light trio” (a label that I must stress exists within the fandom but is not endorsed by TWST), only Kalim fits the bill. Kalim was originally homeschooled, but received an acceptance letter to NRC a month into the school year. Another month later, he transferred in. As far as we know, all students at NRC (save for Yuu and Grim) were chosen by the Mirror of Darkness, even the light trio. Again, I want to emphasize that TWST does not use “light trio” or a similar term to refer to or to characterize Kalim, Silverc and Rook. We’ve gotten no formal in-universe explanation as to why those three in particular have light cosmic magic instead of everyone else’s dark cosmic magic. (This is entirely separate from meta theories, which are out-of-universe explanations for why the “light trio” exists. The popular meta explanation is that it’s because Silver, Kalim, and Rook are not twisted from Disney villains but rather “good” characters like Aurora, the Sultan, and the Huntsman.)
On the subject of transferring dorms, the option is always on the table. We see mob students talk about transferring dorms as early as 1-14:
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In 6-67 (part 20 with the Pomefiore group), Vil describes the transfer process as being tedious and involving a lot of “complicated paperwork and ceremonies”. Crowley also says the process is “burdensome” in 1-20, but this phrasing is quite vague and could mean any number of things. (Burdensome to whom, the staff or the students? Why exactly is it burdensome?) Overall, it seems like transferring dorms would take a long time and require various formalities, but not necessarily be full of problems.
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As long as you’re dedicated and consistently complete what is asked of you to complete the process, transferring should be no issue. I don’t think it’s a given that you’d normally experience troubles in trying to transfer. It should be smooth by default (unless the student backs out, is uncooperative, and/or fails to complete the required steps). So following that logic, I don’t think the poem line is saying anything about Rook’s dorm transfer either.
While it’s true that Rook encourages Vil to watch Neige’s performance and advises that Vil pick Ace and Deuce for the VDC/SDC Tribe, I do not believe there was malicious intent behind these actions. It’s hinted throughout book 5 that Rook’s reasoning for doing these things was to help Vil recognize the value of his “beauty” is something he gains from himself, not from the approval of others.
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This is most likely Rook’s motivation for suggesting Vil observe the competition or to consider freshmen for the team. It’s exposing Vil to the contentedness that can come with imperfection or not being at the very top, something Vil fails to recognize in himself until the end of book 5. Being as perceptive as he is, Rook would have realized that outright telling Vil the moral of the week would not sway his strong-willed friend’s mind. Thus, Rook devised a more roundabout plan and involved Yuu (who, at this point, has a reputation for settling dorm-wide disputes) and co. (unpolished and clumsy underclassmen that Vil could shape as well as potentially also learn from in a reciprocal manner). Maybe Lilia and Cater would have been more technically skilled, being members of a club band and all, but they wouldn’t have provided the same opportunity for growth that Yuu and Adeuce did.
Rook is someone who has always been portrayed as a supporter of Vil’s, a good friend and a trusted confidant. He does have a nefarious side and is 100% capable of deception (like the time in Endless Halloween Night when he quickened his heartbeat to convince Sebek he was also scared and therefore was not a traitor). However, I don’t think Rook would want to betray his friends by actively harming them and putting their lives in danger (both during book 5’s overblot and immediately after in book 6’s rescue mission); he truly cares for them and wants to see them happy and healthy. (One could argue he should have voted for NRC instead of RSA to help Vil achieve his dream instead of betraying him, but that’s another discussion entirely.)
There’s no reason why Rook would go out of his way to do innocuous things like helping Epel with his UM or imparting wisdom to Deuce unless he actually cared and wanted to see them develop. Beyond the scope of book 5, why would Rook do even more innocuous things like trying to make Epel feel welcome and assisting him with learning table manners? Why wouldn’t he go out of his way to provoke Vil more often? Did Crowley hypothetically have even all of these little details down and instruct Rook to do (or not do) these things??? It sounds too far-fetched to attach a hidden motive behind everything Rook says or does. It could be as simple as “he wants to be there to support his friends”.
Before we wrap up, I’d like to quickly touch on the suggestion that Silver and Kalim too were catalysts for Malleus and Jamil’s OBs, respectively. It’s true that they were, but I doubt Silver or Kalim were aware and did so intentionally. Both seemed genuinely ignorant as to the true stress that Malleus and Jamil were under, and Silver + Kalim do not present as toxic people who would want to inflame their friends’ negativity. Of course, there’s always the possibility that Puppet Master Crowley (™) is orchestrating everything from the shadows (but I’m not going to get into the “time loop to gather all the necessary information and learn what the correct choices are” theory here www). I just don’t think Rook is Crowley’s accomplice in all of this if the time loop + intention overblots theories overlap.
This is one of those instances where I see Rook as being very honest with his intentions and because of his… generally strange character (?), his peers and players alike still suspect there is a deeper meaning to his words. I interpret his poem as nothing more than waxing poetic to expressing gratitude to the one man that makes it possible for him to be at NRC as a student: Crowley. Rook states that he wanted to give an exemplary poem using a subject that both Ace and Epel were already familiar with, so he went with the headmaster. Furthermore, we know that Rook is able to witness many wonderful and beautiful things at NRC, as well as make meaningful relationships with interesting people like Vil. He would not be able to do any of these things were he not extended an invitation to NRC—and it is for this reason that it would make sense for him to genuinely be appreciative of Crowley.
Those are all my thoughts on this matter all for now ^^ Hope it was an interesting read!
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smusherina · 1 month
Text
yard work - chapter 5 (regina george x reader)
fandom: Mean Girls (all media)
pairing: Regina George x OFC/Reader
summary: You'd been in the same class as Regina George since kindergarten. You'd lived on the same street even longer. Once upon a time, when life was sandbox disputes and who got the swing first arguments, you'd even been friends. Now, in junior year of high school, you doubted she even remembered you. The same couldn't be said about you. You definitely remembered her.
warnings(s): homophobia is still a theme. another dead relative mentioned. smoking cigarettes.
chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 6
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You'd decided to do nothing about Cady's infiltration for now. Or, well, Regina had told you she'd figure it out and given firm instruction to not do anything.
You didn't exactly like that. Then again, you didn't have any better ideas. Obviously, you wanted her to not be around Regina. It was wrong that she was friends with her under the pretence that she was looking for reasons to stab her in the back. Then again, she didn't need reasons. Regina had provided plenty already.
As September dragged along and eventually turned to October, it felt as if day by day your mind split into an exponentially growing number of pieces. Your desire to protect Regina battled with the fact that she had been wrong so many times, had really hurt people. Didn't they deserve some reparation? Didn't Regina deserve forgiveness? Was any of that for you to decide?
You would have to pick a side and make your stance known, eventually. You'd have to plant your feet firmly on the territory you really believed in. Only, you dreaded that you didn't have as much agency as you'd have liked.
Were you weak or strong for always sticking by someone? What would become of you if you didn't stand up for what you thought was right and wrong? Where was the line?
You didn't want to side with Janis and her lackeys. The more you looked at it, the parallel between them—Janis and Regina—started to become obvious. Janis and Regina weren't that different at all.
What did you even want? What could you want? You didn't have answers to those questions.
The weather was getting colder, so you'd shuffled your wardrobe quite a bit. Short-sleeved flannels and tee shirts were replaced by cotton undershirts and grandpa sweaters. Literal grandpa sweaters. You'd gotten the majority of them from your grandfather's closet, which he had left for you in his will. It was a joke you two had shared, that you looked better in his clothes than he did.
Regina certainly didn't think so.
"Those sweaters are fucking ugly." She put it bluntly, chewing on some gum as she surfed channels on your TV. She'd taken to spending a lot of time at yours recently. You guessed it had to do with her dad being home and her friends no longer being trustworthy.
"They were my gramps'." You pouted and slumped onto the couch next to her. Since your first sleepover, the distance between your bodies had gotten smaller each time. Your knees almost touched.
"The emotional baggage makes them even frumpier." She glanced at you before looking back at the TV. "You'd be better off framing them."
"I like them, Reg." You settled back and turned your attention to the screen as well. "I don't tell you what to wear."
"If you did we wouldn't be friends." She quipped, finally settling on just shutting the thing off. "Now, what's up with you?"
"Nothing." You didn't want to talk about it. You doubted you could talk about something like that and both remain calm. You hated shouting. It always made you cry, no matter the situation. You could've been the angriest you'd ever been, not sad at all, and still cry.
"Fine. Be stubborn." She huffed and tossed her hair over her shoulder. "I'm going to Aaron's Halloween Party."
"Are you?" You turned and blinked at her. "Cool, I guess."
"You know how everybody, like, dresses sexy? It's like the whole point of Halloween, yeah? Cady's from Kenya. She doesn't know that. She thinks Halloween's supposed to be scary."
"Isn't it, though?"
"Ugh, for kids it is. We're practically adults. Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it." Regina recited as if from a book. "Karen's words."
"She's very wise, isn't she?"
"Yes, she is." Regina mused.
"You ever told her that?"
"No, she'd get a big head."
"Karen Shetty would get a big head." You said, disbelieving.
"They want what I have so bad," Regina said. "I have to keep them on their toes."
"Are they even your friends? Or do you keep them close to control them?" You sat up straighter, some dots connecting. "Is that why you got Cady to join you? Because she was too pretty to go unchecked?"
"So you think she's pretty." Regina shifted closer, your knees really touching now. You tried to contain your excitement.
"I feel that's pretty obvious." You leaned in also, almost without noticing yourself. She was like a magnet.
"She had potential. If she were to realize it, who knows what she would've gotten up to."
"You made her realize that. That's a self-fulfilling prophecy if I've ever heard one."
"What do you know about prophecies?"
"I know that if I scoped a threat, I wouldn't make them stronger." You licked your lips nervously. "Keeping an eye on her is one thing, but you've made her an enemy."
"Fine, sure, whatever. Now, I'm gonna bring her down. She's gonna humiliate herself by showing up to the party all scary-looking, and then I'm gonna kiss Aaron Samuels." She grinned and blew a bubble. The thin pink of the bubblegum complimented her eyes.
"Why? To make her jealous? Because she wants something you had?"
"To establish dominance."
"I dunno, Reg." You sighed, rubbing a hand down your face. "You're making an enemy."
"It's what I do best, jorts. Just watch." She got up and headed for the kitchen. Hated to see her leave, loved to watch her go.
So, you watched. You watched her hatch her plans, how she deliberately kept Karen from talking to Cady about high school Halloween party etiquette, which seemed like a challenging task indeed, and how her leash on Gretchen tightened to an impossible degree.
You sat alone in the computer room the night of the party, trying to build a profitable amusement park and failing miserably. Your heart wasn't in it. Not even gaming could take your mind off of Regina.
She was probably kissing Aaron Samuels right now. Right now, their lips were sealed together in a nasty French kiss that surely repulsed anybody close enough to hear the slurping and suckling that came from the union. Aaron was probably on her, touching her everywhere he could get his grubby paws, shamelessly licking at the roof of her mouth like a dog.
While the thought of the jock being a bad kisser soothed you somewhat, it didn't cure the clenching in your chest. Fuck, it was stupid that this hurt you. It wasn't even real, she was using him to get to Cady, but the mere thought of them like that made you want to puke.
You watched the chaos unfold the next morning. At lunch, Janis herded you to their table near the back. You were barely listening, too busy glowering in the general direction of the jock table. Cady was officially on board now, you were told. Regina had officially gone too far for her and now their real plans could commence.
"Hey, dude, are you even listening?" Janis punched you on the shoulder. You glared and punched back.
"No. Yes, I- what did you say? Something about Homecoming."
"Yes!" Janis practically hissed, looking a little manic. You looked at Damien, who was eyeing you suspiciously. "We're spraying water on her when she's inevitably crowned Homecoming queen. Cady's also replacing her moisturizer with lard. Can you think of anything?"
What, you were supposed to contribute to bringing Regina down? She was kidding, right? She continued to stare holes in you.
"Uh..." You swallowed. "I'm not really an ideas guy. I can help in other ways?" You squeaked, desperately wanting out of this whole thing.
"Ugh, you're boring." Janis groaned, slumping against Damien.
"Good talk." You said hastily as you got up. "I'm going to smoke a cigarette now." So acutely uncomfortable, you talked like a robot.
"Can you gimme one?" Janis perked up.
"No, she can't." Damien cast a look at Janis. "We agreed, remember? Smoking only at the garage."
You took that opportunity to skedaddle. They bickered like an old married couple. Though there was no romantic chemistry between them, they were obviously a solid duo.
Janis didn't seem so bitter when she was with Damien. Sure, now that they were planning revenge their focus was on Regina, but they often strayed off track. Why couldn't she just let go? She was clearly doing better now.
As you rounded the building and made it across the lawn towards the bleachers, you spotted a couple making out. The boy had the girl pinned to the wall. You were quite far away and you could hear their lips smacking.
You didn't want to look too close, because gross, but the varsity jacket and pink ensemble were hard to ignore.
You gritted your teeth and pulled out the pack of Marlboros you had on hand. Regina and Aaron fucking Samuels. You lit up and inhaled before you were even properly concealed under the bleachers.
God, you were such a hypocrite. If you weren't over what Regina did to you in middle school, then why should she be? She'd had it worse, too. You couldn't even imagine the consequences of something like that.
If people knew you liked girls, it'd be over. Even if it was sort of like an open secret, because nobody ever asked you about boys or stuff like that, to have it confirmed would ruin you beyond repair.
If people knew you liked Regina, it'd be even worse.
"Hey, why're you sulking under there?"
"Regina, I'm not in the mood to talk."
"Uh, grumpy much?"
"Leave me alone."
You leaned your head back against the steel, looking up at Regina as she stood over you. She was in all pink. A pink, fuzzy sweater, white skinnies, and Uggs. You had a blue, old Carhartt jacket, denim jeans and scuffed Converse.
You matched with her way better than Aaron. You could probably kiss better too. Not that you'd had any practice. But you'd at least have the sense to not slobber all over the one you were kissing.
Unless Regina liked sloppy kisses. As if you'd get to find out.
"Not until you tell me what's wrong."
I like you. I like you too much and it's hard to think. I can't tell wrong from right.
"It's nothing." You took another drag. "Janis and Damien are plotting. It just makes me mad." Not entirely untrue. You were lying by omission, though.
"What kinda plots?"
You hesitated. How could you? "Nothing concrete yet." Now you were really lying. It sunk like a stone down your gullet, hitting your heart on the way down, and dropped heavily into your stomach. It nearly punched a hole clean through.
"Keep me updated." She lingered and you kept looking at her. What would she look like as Homecoming queen, soaked down to her bones up on a stage? What would she look like after smearing lard on her face?
Not ethereal in the sunlight like this, probably. Though you reckoned ruined mascara and pimples wouldn't do anything to shake off this stupid crush.
"For sure." You just nodded and looked down. You couldn't keep your eyes on her when guilt gnawed at your insides.
"Can I have one?" She hopped over your legs and sat down on the grass next to you.
"A cigarette?" You baulked. "A cigarette for Regina George?"
"Yes, you doof." She laughed and reached for your pockets. "Where's the pack?" She kept patting down your body. Your heart sped up, your palms sweated, and a stupid grin split your face.
"Only one." You turned your face as stern as you could make it. "I'm not ruining your beautiful singing voice."
"You think my voice is beautiful?" When she asked questions like that and looked so small waiting for your answer, you didn't quite know what to do with yourself.
"Yeah," You breathed, sounding a little too sincere, too reverent. "You sang at the talent show in middle school that one year. I think it was a Celine Dion song? Captivating."
"That was so embarrassing. I had such shit breath control." She rested her hand on your thigh, casually, and the other behind your back. Your faces were so close. "C'mon, jorts. Now."
"Nobody complained. Everybody loved it." You reached into your pocket and handed her a cig. She put it between her lips and looked at you expectantly.
If you'd been feeling bold, you would've touched the tip of your lit one to hers. Yours was more than halfway done, so you'd have gotten real close. Maybe in your dreams.
You flicked the lighter to life and held the fire for her. "Suck. Yup, you got it."
She inhaled and let the smoke out of her mouth. You took a drag to keep from laughing. "When you've got the smoke in your mouth, inhale it."
She did as you told and started coughing violently. This time, you couldn't keep the laughter in. She shoved you and you laughed harder.
Taglist: @autorasexy, @wedfan2, @unadulterated-moron, @modernsapphicism, @9unknown0, @sage-rose2000, @massive-honkas, @nattys-swiftie, @likefirenrain, @luz-enjoyer, @dandelions4us, @natashamaximoff-69
(if you want to be added to the taglist, reply to this post :))
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theghostofsoap · 3 months
Text
No Force on this Earth (Could Keep Me From You)
Fandom: Call of Duty x Star Wars
Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley/John "Soap" MacTavish
Rating: Teen +
Tags: implied torture, force bonds, blood mention, angst, hurt/comfort
Notes: this fic was massively inspired by @felixeis003 and some lovely CoD x Star Wars art they did of Ghost and Soap <33 it truly got the hamster wheel in my mind going
(Check out the art here!!!)
Soap wasn't sure how long he'd been here. He and Gaz had been together on assignment to investigate a moon where a particularly strong force signature had pinged recently. There was suspicion that a Sith artifact was located there and they wanted to make sure it didn't fall into the wrong hands.
Unfortunately, the entire thing had been a trap. He was pretty sure Gaz had managed to make it out when he'd dove into a swarm of droids. The last thing he remembered was seeing the familiar face of Count Dooku before falling unconscious.
Ever since then, he'd been kept in a cell. A few times he'd been poked and prodded. He wasn't sure what they wanted with him, but the combination of minimal food and the Force suppression collar around his neck was making the time tick by like molasses. Most of the time he meditated while trying to overhear any speck of information that he could, which wasn't much.
The sheer emptiness of it all was almost worse. Maybe they were trying to drive him mad with silence and isolation.
He just had to hope that Gaz was coming back with a rescue party. He wasn't even 100% sure if he was still on the same moon. The only thing he could see from his confinement was the metal-lined hallway and the empty cells beside him.
During his fourth rest cycle, he heard footsteps down the hallway. He did his best to keep calm, taking in slow, steadying breaths. The person who came around the corner was a face he hadn't seen in a while.
The dark cloak swished out behind them as they came to a halt. The smirk on their face was the same one Soap remembered from the few times they were in lessons together.
"Well Phillip, you certainly weren't who I was expecting to see today." He drawled.
"After all these years and they couldn't quite beat the snark out of you could they? And that's Darth Gravis to you," Phillip replied.
Soap snorted. "Really? Darth Gravis? I'm sorry, but I'm nae gonna take you very seriously when I still remember you tripping into the fountain during our forms."
Phillip's eyebrow ticked, but otherwise he kept his face a mixture of arrogant and angry. "When I heard they'd gotten their hands on you, I told them isolation wasn't going to work. But I needed time to get here and I wanted to make sure I was the first one to get my hands on you John." He tilted his head and two droids opened up the cell. The smirk on his face grew as he took a step forward. Soap just stayed in his lotus position.
"By the time I'm done with you, we'll see how seriously you take me."
It had started simple, things Soap had expected. His ribs were bruised and each breath came out with a slight wheeze, but he could take it.
The harder part was the intrusions. Being cut off from the force while feeling someone else's slimy, icher of a presence oozing through his thoughts and tearing down his walls was agonizing. He held in his screams the best he could, making his tongue bleed in the process.
"All those feelings and you're still in the precious Order, huh? Do you think that big bastard actually cares for you that way?" Gravis drawled one time as Soap was hunched over on the floor, trying to catch his breath as blood trickled out of his nose. 
"I watched the footage, you know. We keep most footage of the 'important experiments.' It'd be almost admirable that he isn't dark if it weren't for the fact that he's just so weak. You should've seen him. Pathetic honestly the way he-"
Not many things had gotten to Soap, but with his shields already low and his emotions in fray, hearing him talk about him that way made Soap snap. He lunged forward, slamming himself into Gravis's legs. With his hands still bound behind him, there wasn't much he could do before the droids grabbed him and threw him back against the other wall.
Gravis laughed as he stood up and dusted himself off. "My my, got you riled up didn't I?" He spit to the side. "Let's see if you're just as pathetic as he is."
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Ghost hadn't felt Soap in 5 days. While he didn't constantly check on their force bond, he didn't realize how much he felt it until it suddenly shut off.
He can remember the moment it happened with stark clarity. He'd been helping around at the town he was currently staying in, carrying some supplies to help rebuild a health center that had collapsed, when it was like everything went silent.
He froze mid step as he rapidly tried to figure out what on earth had just happened. He couldn't even pinpoint what was wrong or why everything felt slightly off until he assessed his bonds... and realized he couldn't feel Soap.
Ghost didn't have many force bonds still. The ones he had with his old master weren't the strongest and the ones that had been almost forced upon him during-
Well, he didn't have many force bonds anymore for a reason. Soap was about the only one, though Price had one too.
Ghost didn't know what to do. He'd immediately tried to reach out to Soap's comms to no success. The last thing they'd talked about was that he was going to be away on a mission with Garrick-
His comm rang. 
He answered without hesitation. Maybe it was Soap from a different-
"Soap's gone."
It was Garrick. Ghost clenched his comm unit as he stared at the holographic form of the other Jedi, who seemed just fine-
"Where."
"We were on a moon in the Pelgrin sector. It was a trap and he was taken." Garrick said, getting straight to the point.
Ghost immediately started walking back to where he was staying. He had a small ship. It would take him at least 3 days to make it that far. He was already plotting his course when he realized Garrick was still talking.
"-ooku but I don't know if he's still on that moon. Ghost. The Order is going to want to try and go after him too but they won't just storm in. I don't- You know why I'm calling you, right?" 
Ghost grunted. Of course he did. The Order wouldn't be as efficient as he could be, with their bureaucratic tape. There were very few things he missed about the Order, but the political ties that had developed over the recent decades wasn't one of them. 
"I'm on my way. If you get any updates, contact me." He said, disconnecting the call before Garrick could say anything else.
His ship already had rations on it, but he made sure to gather a few more as well as a few additional medical supplies before leaving, despite wanting to peel out as soon as possible. When he punched in the route, he cursed under his breath at the time. Every moment felt like one too many, and he couldn't even be certain that they'd still be there when he arrived.
But he'd have time to make some calls along the way, put some feelers out. He knew who he could trust with this information.
As it was nearing the last day of his trek, he'd gotten word back that Soap was likely not far from where he'd been taken. A ship had been spotted briefly in orbit tucked behind a nearby asteroid. One wouldn't easily spot it if they didn't know what they were looking for.
Ghost took in a deep breath as he started to make a plan. The main thing he had to do was get in, but once that happened-
Well, he wasn't worried too much about whatever might be between him and Soap. It wouldn't be there long.
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They didn't move him afterwards. He was left lying in a cooling pile of his own blood. His forehead was up against the metal floor as he tried to take slow breaths despite his protesting lungs which were both sore and burning as he stretched the cauterized wounds across his chest.
"I'm one with the force and the force is with me." He whispered to himself softly. He took in a slow breath through his nose but it was interrupted by a cough he tried to suppress. He spit up some blood and groaned, trying to take better note of his body.
It felt like half of him was offline, a combination of numbness and tingling stretching across his system. He worked slowly, wiggling each individual finger before he finally felt like he might be able to lift himself up to a seated position.
That's when he heard the gunshots.
He froze, uncertain at first where they were coming from. That's when he realized they were deeper in the building.
... Was someone here for him finally?
He felt a stronger wave of renewed motivation flow through him as he managed to get back to a seated position with only minimal groans and winces of pain. 
"I'm one with the force and the force is with me." He said again, slightly firmer as he tried to calm the ringing in his ears so he could take better stock of where the fighting was happening.
It sounded like it was closer. Was it getting closer?
Suddenly the door down the hall opened, but the gunshots didn't get louder. Instead, he heard the familiar thrum of a lightsaber igniting.
"Well, well, what did I tell them? I knew he'd come for you." Gravis said as he stepped into the cell Soap was in. His red saber crackled angrily as he slowly lifted it, coming to a stop just under Soap's chin.
Soap took in a shaky breath as he looked up at Gravis, holding his chin as steady as he could.
"Sidious has been wanting him back, for another test run. He's certain he can break him this time." Gravis drawled. "I'm not sure why he wants that pathetic thing, but you were just bait." He smirked. "Don't worry, your usefulness hasn't run out yet. I think it'd be more impactful if you were around during the conditioning this time. Toy with his mind a bit. Or maybe we can make him kill you himself, hm? See if we can turn that rage the right direction-"
Another door opened and this time the gunshots were next to none. "Darth Gravis! The force user, he's-" a droid started to say when suddenly the sound of metal hitting the floor rang through the hall.
"My my, took you long enough to get here Simon," Gravis said, looking over but not moving his saber an inch. "Go on Johnny, say hello to him. It's only polite."
Ghost's eyes snapped over to where he was seated on the floor. Despite not being able to feel their force bond like he usually could, Soap could still catalog the emotions running across his face. Ghost's eyes went from him to the puddle of the blood on the floor and back up to the lightsaber at his throat.
Soap saw his hands tighten on the grip of his saber.
"You're just as feeble as I remember Gravis," Ghost rumbled, "Could never pick a fair fight because you knew you'd lose. Beating up on someone who's chained up and disconnected from the force? Does that make you feel stronger?"
Soap saw Gravis's expression flare with anger. The saber was immediately withdrawn and directed towards Ghost.
"You were all but scraped off the floor when you 'escaped.' You know he LET you go right? Someone as simple as you could never have made it out on your own." Gravis snarled. "I've seen the tapes. You're not even worth his time!"
Ghost slid into a fighting stance, not breaking eye contact with Gravis. "And yet he's taking his time trying to lure me back, when he's got a lap dog already drooling to do as he says. Do you feel replaceable yet mutt?"
Gravis snarled louder and immediately launched himself towards Ghost, who blocked him flawlessly. Where Gravis's attacks were fury and erratic, Ghost was as steady and smooth as ever. He looked like he was hardly breaking a sweat as Gravis danced around him.
"Face it Gravis, you were always meant to beg for scraps. If you were truly good enough you wouldn't be the one running errands to try to lure in another apprentice would you?"
This made Gravis lunge, but it was exactly what Ghost wanted to happen. He quickly grabbed Gravis by the shoulder, blocking his saber and throwing him to the floor. He stomped onto the hand that was holding his saber and Gravis shouted as he dropped it. 
Ghost stared down at him for a moment. 
Gravis glared, reaching up a hand, clearly about to use the force, when Ghost's expression finally broke. He curled his upper lip before gripping the air in front of him, easily lifting up Gravis from the floor before quickly slamming him back into it.
Ghost only looked at his limp form for a moment more before he immediately spun and sprinted over to Soap.
Soap looked up at him, cracking a small smile, though he was sure the blood covering his gums wasn't helping. "Hey Ghostie."
The brooding man dropped to his knees and quickly reached around Soap's neck. Soap felt the collar's latch release before he heard it, as the feeling of the Force flooded back into him. 
It was like taking a deep breath after being underwater for too long.
"Oh Force," he breathed.
Immediately the next thing he felt was the cacophony of emotions flooding off of Ghost. "Ghost, I-"
"Don't move Johnny," Ghost said, his tone gruffer than normal. Johnny held still as Ghost deftly cut through the cuffs keeping his hands behind his back. When his hands were free, he slowly moved them around to his front, rubbing his wrists gently. 
"Thank you," he said, realizing how fucked his voice sounded. He's sure it wasn't helping the growing concern Ghost was expressing.
"How broken are you?" Ghost asked.
"Ah, it looks worse than i' is," Soap said, but his point was a bit ruined when he had a coughing fit at the end that left him light headed.
Suddenly, the world around him shifted. He yelped and his position adjusted. Soap blinked and realized how close he was to Ghost's face now, the strong arms wrapped around him. 
Ghost didn't look down at him, taking long strides back through the facility, completely ignoring the graveyard of droids around him. "I have medical supplies on the ship. I'm going to put you there before I come back and... finish what needs to be done in here."
"Ah've seen my share of death before Ghost, you didn' have'ta shield me from that."
Ghost let out a slow breath but didn't reply. 
"Aye, you can' ignore me when I'm this close'ta your face," Soap said.
Finally he saw the hint of a smile under Ghost's usual face scarf. "Mm, I could try."
"Ah you could, but I don' think you traveled all the way here to save me because you don' like me."
Ghost glanced down at him, his brown eyes showing just as much as their force bond revealed. "... Johnny."
Johnny reached up a hand and cupped Ghost's face. "Thank you for comin' for me."
"My head's too quiet without you in it," he replied, pausing for a moment. "... I'll always come for ya Johnny."
There was a joke on the tip of his tongue, but his heart was too happy to make it at the moment. "I know you would Simon."
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carleycore · 1 year
Text
When they insult you (Kenma and Oikawa pt. 2)
A/N thank you all for the suggestions and support! The ideas came from @multi-fandom-fanfic !!
Genre: Hurt/Comfort (i think that’s right) 
Warnings: Mentions of eds, self deprecating thoughts and fluff
Part One 
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(Kenma)
After you left he felt bad, he really did. But, he was still frustrated so he finished the stream and went to bed. Hoping you would’ve cooled down by then, but you hadn’t. You were fast asleep in the guest room with dried tears on your face.
The next day he apologized, you forgave him, and he thought that was the end of everything.
The only difference he noticed was how you seem more tired and less enthusiastic.
Before, you were more than happy to wedding plan, and it made him smile seeing how happy you were.
Now, every little thing was seeming to stress you out and you were gone a lot more.
Upon further inspection, he found out you had gotten a job.
“Y/N? Why did i find out that you were working at the new arcade downtown?”
“Oh,” you answered tiredly, “you wanted me to, you remember?”
And he did remember. And he felt horrible.
Somehow his fans knew too.
“What do you mean, what's wrong with Y/N?” he was reading his chats. His entire stream had comments flooded with questions about Y/N
Why isn't Y/N posting anymore?
Did you and your fiancee break up?
Y/N looks so tired recently.
And he knew they were right. Ending his stream he went downstairs and saw you crying on the couch. Looking from your phone to your computer like your life depended on it.
“Is... Is everything okay?” He asked, cuddling you.
“Yeah,” you sniffled, “just balancing school, work, and the wedding is a lot. It's getting overwhelming.”
“Y/N, I'm so sorry. I was just having a bad day and I took it out on you. I'm so so sorry my love.”
“It's okay, Ken. Just please, never do that again.”
“Noted, I love you.”
“I love you too.”
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(Oikawa)
Oikawa didn’t apologize. He didn’t tend to. But, you didn’t need him to. You just carried on with your life, only difference was now you were working out more and eating less. 
And Tooru noticed. Complimenting on how beautiful you looked. He must’ve really thought you looked good as the very next day he informed you his friends were coming over for dinner. The same friends he saw in the store.
"Y/N you look beautiful!” Nami complimented, handing you a present filled with baby stuff.
“Thank you, I’ve been trying.” 
“You don’t need to work out,” she said seriously, “I wish I could gain some weight, I hate how disproportionate my body looks due to my bump,” She whined, as you both took a seat at the table.
“That’s nonsense dear,” her husband chimed in. You look amazing. 
That was the support you wished you got from your husband.
Especially now. You didn’t feel well at all.
You knew something was wrong.
And you were right. The very next moment you passed out on the table. 
Next thing you knew, you were lying on a hospital bed. 
“Oh my gosh, Y/N. I’m so happy you’re okay. I don’t know what I would’ve done if something happened to you or the baby.”
“You got really fucking lucky Oikawa,” Nami sneered, “she was starving herself because you talked about the way she looked while she’s pregnant with YOUR baby.”  
After making sure you were okay and slapping Oikawa Nami and Sato left. 
“Y/N- I-”
“Just save It Tooru. I don’t want to see you right now.”
“I-I know you’re mad at me. You have every right to be. Just know It’ll never happen again and I’ll never stop trying to get you to forgive me. I’ll do whatever it takes. I’m so, so sorry.”
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I hope you guys enjoyed! More characters coming soon.
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distort-opia · 10 months
Note
Hello! So I recently got into batman, and I’ve been slowly climbing my way up my reading list while also browsing through tumblr in search for metas about him, which is how I found your blog, and I really enjoy your metas!
I have a question though that won’t leave my mind, yet I also don’t want to stop my current reading list to jump into another series (JL), so I hope you don’t mind me asking this question to you instead 🙏
Basically, I’ve been wondering whether Bruce has opinions about Clark in relation to his self—Bruce’s self? So far from what I’ve read, Dick is (excuse me if the wording isnt exactly accurate, but just as a sums up) “the one that brings the light to Bruce’s darkness & the ideal self—the best of him”, whereas Joker is “the mirror to his self—the him that ‘what could have been’, the him who took different route”, and I wonder if there is a similar thinking/opinion about this self thing from him @ Clark too (like some sort of parallels)? I’m sorry if it sounds confusing 😅 Thank you!
Welcome to the fandom! Thank you for the kind words, glad you've enjoyed what meta I've put out. Hope you're having a fun time with Batman comics.
Oh Bruce definitely has opinions on Clark and Superman in general, in relation to himself. Though I have to make the note that in no way was Superman intended or built as a narrative foil for Batman's character, a "mirror self". Dick and Joker are characters who populated Batman's world from early on and were always meant to say something about the protagonist. Superman is a protagonist onto himself; he was created before Batman, and his popularity was actually a big factor contributing to Batman's creation. But that doesn't mean these two characters haven't grown together and influenced each other in a myriad of ways.
On a surface level, you've got the... grumpy one/sunshine one dichotomy. Superman is brightly colored and more emotional and fights in the light to bring people hope. Batman is enshrouded in darkness and stoically represses his emotions and fights in the night for justice and vengeance. One in the light, one in the shadows, one alien, one human, the "boy scout" and the "bad boy"... Even though they work together and are both on the side of good, these contrasts between Bruce and Clark are easily noticed by both others and themselves, and have led to conflicts on more than one occasion. But the way this translates in Bruce's head, to approach it from the angle you mentioned, is probably best summed up by the following pages... which I'm putting under a cut since this gets a bit long. Spoilers too I guess, for the Rebirth Batman run (if you haven't gotten to it yet).
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Batman (2016) #36
"He's a better man than I am. [...] Who am I, compared to him?" And this is no way a new sentiment for Bruce:
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Batman: Hush
Bruce doesn't see himself as a good person. He's capable of risking people's lives, of blackmail, lying, torture and manipulation, of unbelievable brutality and violence in the service of what he believes is his Mission. But he sees Clark as an inherently good person; as an ideal that he himself is not capable of ever reaching, of ever being. If I were to summarize only the projection aspect when it comes to Batman and Superman's dynamic, I'd say it's this one-- Superman is the hero Batman wishes he could be, but not one he'd ever try to become, because he believes himself fundamentally incapable of it. If as you said Dick is someone Bruce relates to and sees parts of himself in, but better (in trying to help Dick he retrospectively tries to help his child self), Clark isn't that. Superman is less of a mirror Bruce actively acts on, and more of a... negative. Clark is technically an alien, and yet in many ways he's more "human" than Bruce, having grown up with a loving family that Bruce wishes he had. Where Bruce tries to rise above the humanity he sometimes sees as weakness, both in emotional and physical terms, Clark is someone who's already "above" humanity, and yet yearns to be part of it. Moreso, Bruce envies Clark's sheer god-like power, but he knows that he doesn't have Clark's good character; that if he had this kind of unstoppable power, his need for complete control would drive him mad. Which actually happened one time, in Superman/Batman (2003) #53-56.
That being said, as is noticeable even in the pages above, this can result in Bruce putting Clark up on a pedestal, and idealizing him a bit too much, to the point of forgetting that Clark is a person too, with flaws and weaknesses. And not just that... the more ruthless and calculated side of Bruce never truly stops seeing Clark's power, both as something he can wield and something that can be turned against him (hence the hoarding of kryptonite and the contingency plans, in case Superman went bad). Perhaps Bruce's attitude more generally is illustrated best in this very recent moment:
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Batman (2016) #128
Superman as Earth's greatest hero, and its greatest weapon. And Bruce is willing to risk his life to preserve that, because by comparison, he isn't these things. (And because Clark is his friend.)
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a-doubleh-x · 12 days
Text
A little frustrated lately with the Hazbin fandom
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At the present moment, it's been about 3 months since Hazbin Hotel's first season dropped. It's a lot of story at once, but it's also a proper start ever since the pilot era.
I'm sure most people expected some sort of controversy coming from a show that takes place in Hell, whose main characters include porn stars and murderers, but personally, I didn't expect the biggest ones to come from the fandom itself.
From the start we've heard of all sorts of tone deaf opinions coming from inside the house, included but not limited to:
• The idea that Angel Dust's character and his music video, Poison, glorifies abuse when its artistic intention clearly is to denounce it.
• The vitriol against problematic characters like Valentino, which has lead to the harrassment of cosplayers and fans of said characters.
• Ship wars mixed with hate speech, from SJWs claiming Alastor ships are ace erasure from Vaggie haters attacking Chaggie because it's canon.
I could go into detail on each of these incidents, but I won't go into it today. I'll just say for now I'm *really* disappointed by this fandom. I was really excited about HH because I thought it would bring much needed attention to certain topics, such as the still ongoing demonization of minorities to the crippling self loathing that comes from abusive relationships.
It feels like the people to whom the show's message is made for are the ones who are working the hardest to tear it down, which is not only a disservice to themselves but everyone involved as well. I expected the harshest criticism involving the show would come from the typical rabid christian ultra conservatives, but apparently they don't need to do their job anymore because they already got us to do it, apparently.
Hazbin Hotel became a creative spark for me when I was lost and empty of motivation. I began writing loads of fan fiction from just before season 1 came out, but during the latest weeks I've just gotten tired of it.
As a mutli-shipper, I'm constantly in the middle of ship wars. I'm hearing constantly on this very site of Charlastor shippers who hate Vaggie because she's supposedly terrible and hate her role in the show canon. I'm hearing of Charlastor haters that claim it's ace erasure, even though no shipper I've heard of denies the fact that Alastor is canonically ace. And worst of all, I hate the fact that some people still claim that Charlie is a lesbian and shouldn't be shipped with men when she's canonically bi.
As a biromantic person who recently came out of the closet, it used to be very liberating to write fics where Charlie gets involved with both Vaggie and Alastor. I like both characters and I like the idea of Charlie being romantically involved with both characters. But apparently the one thing that is not still worthy of respect in this day and age is divergence of opinions.
I came to this realization the other day when episode 2 of The Amazing Digital Circus came out. It's a smaller fandom, even though the audience attention is *massive*. I was looking through the community posts and... guess what? Practically little to none inflamatory speech or ship wars.
People there ship Pomni with Jax, Jax with Ragatha, Ragatha with Pomni, even Pomni with *Caine* for some bizarre reason that I can't comprehend and even Gangle and Zooble.
People *get* the intended message, which I must admit it can be largely attributed to the fact that the writing is better (sorry Vivz) and the episodes are more sparce. But the few people who don't get it don't go around attacking anyone with a different opinion or the showrunners themselves.
I apoligize formaking an unfair comparison, since, as I previously mentioned, these two fandoms have very different sizes and their respective shows deal with very different issues, but I'm just expressing my perspective.
I'm still highly disappointed in Hazbin fans. I expected better than you, but if this post reaches the type of fans I'm talking about, I'm sure they're happy that I'm upset. So, congratulations, you won.
Anyways, I'm gonna stop writing Hazbin fics for a while, for how long, who knows and I'm going to start writing TADC fics instead. I already had an idea in mind, so it's little trouble for me.
Thank you to the fans who have been engaging in peaceful discourse and have sated my shipping thirst so far with wonderful art and writing pieces alike. You've pulled me through some hard times, but it's time for me to part.
Sorry as well for the melodramatic tone of this post, but I'm just really sad and general and I need something to obsess with in order to prevent my inner demons from taking over.
In any case, thank you for reading, and I hope to see you all again soon 👋
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stagefoureddiediaz · 25 days
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Hello, I don't get the "couch theory is a deeply buried fandom thing" going on ? I rewatched the beginning of season 6 just yesterday and it's a completely canon theory that Buck exposes to Eddie then to Bobby in those exact words, so I'm confused at the freak out ?
Hey Nonnie
Sooooooo Couch theory actually goes back to pre season 6 times and there is a difference between couch theory and couch meta - I shall attempt to explain!
So there have been jokes bouncing around fandom since fairly early on about Buck and couches - partly because they've always been a low key thing on the show (Buck and Eddie helping Maddie move her couch, Buck sleeping on Maddies/Chims couches when he moved out of Abbys, his comment about sleeping on the couch after the truck bombing etc) but some time mid way through s4 (I think - someone can correct me if I'm wrong) it was mentioned that Buck rarely interacts with anyone on a couch except Eddie and Chris - especially as time has gone on. it didn't really go anywhere aside from being a fun observation. It picked up a bit when we had Buck sleeping on the Diaz couch after the shooting - but it really was a fandom thing that we had a bit of fun with - and it becae a staple of fanfic.
Fast forward to season 5 and suddenly Bucks couch became a real thing - especially when Taylor moved into Bucks loft - I made an off hand comment at some point (I can't find the post) about how Taylors couch being blue and brought in by the two guys was a metaphor for Eddie during the shooting - how Eddie was always the thing between them in their relationship, not Lucy. Anyway things spiralled from there and there were many conversations happening about the couch being used as a metaphor for Buck's relationships etc - most of this was during the hiatus between seasons 5 and 6.
Then when season 6 started and Buck hadn't gotten a new couch, and he acknowledged why he hadn't got a new couch - the very thing we had been discussing over hiatus - and Oliver and Kristen Reidel mentioned it in an interview as well.
So now we're in a situation where the character has attached his own meaning to his couch, while we in fandom have out own thing going on with the couch of it all, essentially creating two different theories. Well a theory and a metaphor. I have recently reblogged a lot of hte couch theory posts should anyone want to read them for the full theory and exploration of the subject, but what it essentially boil down to is the following;
Couch theory is the fandom theory about Buck and his relationship with couches and encompasses the fact that its far more tied to the Diaz boys - such as the fact that post coma, Buck can only find the peace to sleep on the Diaz couch and not on his own - the one his mother had brought him. the theory posts explore the fact that we see Buck on the Diaz couch far more than anyone elses couch (in fact irc, other than his own couch, we rarely see Buck actually on a couch - chairs or armchairs yes but rarely couches - in other peoples houses!)
Then there is the couch metaphor - which is the symbolism Buck himself placed on his couch - it is the part of the theory that has crossed over as the character has become self aware of this specific aspect of the couch of it all - it is him recognising that he hasn't actually been the one to chose his couch - that his girlfriends have chosen them for him - and within that that he didn't have much agency in choosing the relationships either (this is not to say he didn't want to be in those relationships or that he was forced into them, it is him acknowledging that he has essentially been chased/ pursued and then gone along blindly, rather than the other way round, or an equal pursue/ pursued situation.) so like his needing to choose a new couch, he is going to take his time choosing his next partner.
Now we have a situation where Buck was seemingly going to pick out a new couch with Natalia at the end of s6 - which should, by implication of the weight Buck placed on the choosing of a new couch, mean that Natalia was the one - that Buck himself felt he had agency in his choice of relationship - and that he could stop placing so much weight on the couch and its symbolism.
Only we're in season 7 now, Buck didn't last very long with Natalia (a few weeks at most as the season is meant to more or lest pick up where s6 left off) and we haven't seen (properly) the new couch in the loft. In Bucks head he may no longer be placing any importance on the metaphor of the couch, however, the shows reluctance to give us little more than a glimpse through the stairs of a couch existing in the space, despite the fact we've had a couple of scenes in the loft now, is suggestive that there might in fact be more to the couch theory still to play out. Thats not the part the character is aware of (the metaphor) its the part he is un aware of - the part the audience is aware of - the theory that shows the Diaz boys as being central to the couch and Bucks search for happiness.
So couch theory lives on (it never died) and we wait to see how things play out with Buck getting (already having) a new couch, the fact that he already has one and where things head in relation to the diaz boys and Eddies couch - because Chris is the only one who has sat on it so far this season!
I hope this helps clear things up a little Nonnie but feel free to come back with more questions if you have them.
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freckliedan · 6 months
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omfg so im reading your linguistics paper rn and im at the part where you talk about how its taboo to post abt the vday vid or dailybooths etc. but i feel like the chains have loosened over the years so to speak? cuz like, on twitter people have just. posted full dailybooth screenshots, or reference the 2009 phan song all the time which itself refs vday. and im wondering if thats like, because the community had gotten smaller after the dapg hiatus that ppl were more lax about it, or if it felt like dnp were more lax about it, or if these are all younger fans who werent aware of this etiquette at all but since so many younger fans have been joining like post coming out they just dont see it as taboo at all? some self-policing does still occur, specifically w ppl reposting dans nakedbooths, but its def not the case of YOU HAVE TO BE COMPLETELY SILENT ABOUT THIS anymore. i havent even finished reading yet but im enthralled
OOH thank you for the question i have so many thoughts on this actually. (context)
i think there's multiple reasons why the taboo on discussing the vday vid & other deleted social media things has grown lesser? under the cut bc i got wordy.
partially i'd chalk it up to the change in phandom demographics. like, there's a way lower proportion of us now who were around for the direct aftermath of the first major leak in 2012, or who even were a part of the phandom when a majority of folks had been present for that. things were so bad and painful then & in the era directly afterwards! people still learn about that but the knowledge of how bad things got is always going to be different from the lived experience.
so that's reason one: i think that within the fandom the strongest emotional reaction to the existence of the vday video & deleted social media posts will always exist in ppl who were around in 2011-2013 & similarly deeply ingrained in folks who joined right after that in 2014-15. and i think there's still a lot of us but there's also just like.. so many less of us now, too. the vast majority of my mutuals from 5 years ago have abandoned or deleted their blogs.
i do think another part of why things have gotten less taboo is bc it's no longer something that has the potential to out dan and phil/how directly they've acknowledged the social media posts (& to a lesser degree the vday vid)?
like. dan literally used screenshots that he almost certainly got from the phan directory in basically i'm gay. they acknowledged that the manchester eye meant something to them in giving the people what they want/witl (watched them at the same time, can't remember which had that in it). i know they knew how people would react to them mentioning iconic teen dalien moments in the big wheel in the sims.
there's also the fact that like... angry phil DMs/copyright strikes are a thing of the past? i'm not going to tell people where to find the vday video but it's stupidly easy to locate on more mainstream platforms at this point in time. shit, that brings me to another point: fans who joined more recently weren't around for the era where blogs were getting taken down for what they were posting. another reason it's more chill now.
like, the openness of the secret is like, something that makes seeking out the taboo less of a thrill?
but on the other hand! learning in detail abt the vday vid and old social media posts is something i think people find less necessary now? that used to be the most concrete like... phan proof. proof they were queer. and now that they're explicitly gay and openly together to the degree that they are it's like. the value of the information has lessened.
to go in a different direction. i definitely wouldn't call it a formalized etiquitte that the youngun's just don't know, especially when it comes to the social media posts—they've always circulated and even 5 years ago when i wrote that paper they were more openly talked about even tho the vday video wasn't (though again: 5 years ago was still wayyyyy more lax than 2013/14).
ultimately there's always just been so much clout tied up to knowing about the vday video & social media posts? so even though being too blatant has always been a taboo transgressing that norm with skill has also always been a phandom value.
i'm not going to get too far into the ways that dan and phil's fandom literacy and the fan response of archiving everything play into things bc i think i covered that well in my paper but yeah!
i don't have a good conclusion but: less % of the fandom being present for the aftermath of dnp being outed by the leak + greater aknowledgement of these subjects by dnp + less value for the information in the vday vid & deleted social media posts = more casual attitude towards vday vid & social media posts and a healthier phandom overall
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insertsomthinawesome · 3 months
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Sorry if this doesn’t make sense but how do you… art? Like from looking at your art, there’s just so many different fandoms and it’s all fantastic!! How do you not stick to one or feel like you *have* to stick to one? Sorry
Aw Friend! No need to apologize! :D You asked your question plenty politely! That's a really interesting question actually, and I'm fascinated to be asked it! Because I actually do know the kinda thing you're talking about! or at least I have experiences that feel like they line up with what you're asking. A lot of its... growing up? I guess? And not in the sense of like. becoming an adult. but the non-stop process of growing and learning more about life. When I was younger, an actual child, I just Did it. I drew whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I didn't question hoping to a new interest or drawing different fandoms. I just did it. But the older you get the more complicated a lot of things get right? 😔 That was true for me.
I actually spent several years terrified, of moving on. Of leaving old fandoms behind. There was one fandom I actually forced myself not to leave for like... 2 years? Because I was afraid of all the projects I wouldn't complete, all the stories I wouldn't tell, all the art i wouldn't make. But honestly that was a horrible decision? It burnt me out of the specific fandom SO BADLY. Its only been around this last year that I've been able to enjoy things around it again without an overhanging shadow of stress.
I was still scared to fandom hop after that incident tho. Despite having gotten burned by caving to my own fears. It wasn't until I got into Trigun that I actually started to get less scared. A friend I met in that fandom, someone who was older than me, told me that... things have a way of coming back around. If you know the song "Everything Stays" From Adventure time? She said it was like that song. You will inevitably get older. But these things won't be gone. And you can always come back to them :) That clicked in my brain... and it took a bit longer, a bit more time of accepting that fact for me to find peace... but honestly? I kinda have now. At least for this moment in time. I wouldn't be surprised if the fear comes back around again, fear is funny and insidious like that. But I have the tools to beat it now :) The other two things I would mention are these: For starters: this might be obvious? But I'm a hobbyist artist. I don't make money off of my art, I don't sell it, I don't need numbers or clout in order to pay my bills. I'm completely free to do my own thing! Ain't nothing wrong with making a living off of your artwork and if that's the path that you want to walk GO FOR IT. But that path does have its own challenges. Because I don't walk that path, I am free to make whatever I want, without worrying about how it might reflect on my finances. The other thing is...
PERFECTIONISM...
THIS, NASTY LITTLE VILE COCKROACH, WILL RUIN YOUR ART LIFE SO BADLY ITS INSANE. It will ruin your NORMAL life super fast too 😔 it is an insidious little shoulder devil telling you, that you will be happier if you just do it the "perfect" way. IT IS SO SO SO SO SO SO WRONG. That is the key to the door of endless procrastination and broken dreams. SFLJSLF to get less metaphorical about it though: If you're always waiting for the perfect moment to make art for a fandom, to leave a fandom, to join a fandom (in this case i just mean "Get into the thing that interests you" when I say "Fandom") or create literally anything, you will be waiting forever. I know because i have been :') And its made it very hard to draw both in my past, and right now this very day.
Truthfully i'm still working on that one??? I've had some epiphanies recently that have helped a lot with my perfectionism... but I haven't tried drawing since having them? (drowning in the new Honkai Star Rail Patch WHEEZE) So uh. Not sure If I'm over that hill yet xD But yeah, if that's one piece of advice i could give you to take seriously, its don't chase perfection, in ANYTHING. Especially art. It will never be enough for you. And if you're doing it for other people, it will never be enough for them. Art is wonderful and messy, and human. And that is okay.
Its taken me a lot of soul diving and thinking and a lot of help from outside influence and kind people for me to figure this stuff out too. So don't feel bad to ask for help kay? We all need help. A lot xD I'm still not like, the king this stuff either. There are a lot of smaller, more niche, fandoms, I want to draw for, but still haven't, because of my own anxiety and embarrassment. There are fandoms I haven't drawn for because I don't feel like i have the adequate amount of information to be, ""allowed"" too (which is totally a fake standard btw, there is no barrier to entry for when you're "allowed" to draw something). I'm working on these problems every day.
Oh actually one last note: People can influence how hard it is for you to draw for a bunch of fandoms too. If you know you'll get made fun of for drawing something, its hard to draw. If you know you'll get praised for drawing something, sometimes that makes it easier to draw. Both of those things can mess you up BAD. Constantly drawing for other people (when its not a deliberate gift) can make you feel really upset and angry, and dissonant with your artwork.
But it can be equally as hard to realize nobody will share your enthusiasm if you don't draw what they like. That's not a judgement against anybody's friendships, we all got our own interests, and nobody can be 100% Invested in everything their friends enjoy. But It can make it a bit more emotionally challenging sometimes. And it can be hard to like?? Emotionally deal with that? in a way it makes art that you know will perform well, either with your friend group or online, like... "Candy". Its tastes good, but it doesn't give you long term energy (ie there's nothing wrong with it, but its not sustainable as your only form of sustenance) Meanwhile making art that is purely self indulgent is like eating a full and healthy meal. It gives you that long term energy of personal satisfaction, and your enjoyment and happiness also doesn't inherently hinge on whether or not other people appreciate it like you do. Obviously there's no issue if what you genuinely want to draw would also do well online/with your friends!
ANYWAYS, yeah, I'm still maturing and learning and growing with a lot of my opinions and perspectives and emotions on this stuff? Its definitely easier said than done, and while from the outside it looks effortless... I understand why you'd be struggling anon. I hope you can figure it out for yourself too! Best of luck :D also i could go on and on and on about this topic for years because alsjdfaksjdflJSDJGSD ooohhhhhhh boy I have learned and witnessed and thought many a thunk.
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hannieehaee · 2 months
Text
ARE WE STILL FRIENDS (teaser)
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18+ / mdi
summary: being besties with two of the most popular idols in korea always came with a few rumors here and there, but what happened when one of your platonic besties suddenly started acting a little friendlier than usual? or worse, what happened when they both turned their affections to you?
content: idol!au, hybeidol!reader x idol!mingyu, hybeidol!reader x idol!jungkook, 97liner!reader, friends2lovers, not mingyu x jk (they just share u like all besties would<3), not that much plot, afab reader, smut, oral (f and m receiving), body worship, fingering, penetrative sex, etc.
(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)
wc: 1.3k (teaser); 8.2k (full fic)
release date: april 27th
or you can check it out on my ko-fi or patreon today by subscribing to either one!
a/n: decided to write a little surprise fic!! ive been getting into bts lately and so this was born<3
masterlist | kofi/patreon
support me through a one time tip<3
"Do you think the company would get mad if we did a live together right now?", Jungkook pondered out loud as the three of you sat on different pieces of furniture around his large living room.
"Yeah."
"They didn't seem to mind when Jungkook and I did it that one time," disagreed Mingyu.
"Yeah, but I'm the girl. I'm the one who wakes up to new dating rumors every time we hang out publicly."
"Yeah, but people must know we're just friends by now, right? It's been years."
That much was true.
You weren't sure of the exact date, but your friendship with both boys predated the overall international success of Kpop as of recent years. When you had met both boys, they had barely battled their way through puberty – though you weren't faring any better.
The media enjoyed making the three of you a subject, knowing that you were evidently the closest out of all members of the popular 97s friend group. Being the only girl integrant, it was common for people to have the misconception that you were romantically involved with either Mingyu or Jungkook, seeing as you were often spotted in public with them.
You'd gotten used to the rumors and hate that came attached to being their friend, now usually leaving those things in the back burner rather than letting them bother you. By now, the three of you were a bit more careless about being seen together. Being seniors in the industry, those things didn't matter much to you anymore, but being seen inside Jungkook's house would surely stir up the worst rumors to date, so going live with him was entirely out of the question.
It did bother you sometimes; the double standard. While Jungkook and Mingyu could even interact in public or mention each other freely, any time you did so you were met with hate from either fandom, sometimes even your own. It also made you worry about your future. Could you ever be in a relationship without facing the brunt of all the hate that would come your way? At 26 years of age, it was a frustrating reality to think about.
Jungkook got up at some point to go fetch some more bottles of soju. Apparently the seven bottles the three of you had drank collectively weren't enough for the large men you were drinking with.
While Jungkook was gone, Mingyu got up from his seat on the couch opposite to you and took a seat down next to you, invading your personal space like he usually did.
"Worrying your pretty little head about something?", asked Mingyu as he leaned over you, taking the occasional sip from his drink.
"It's nothing."
"C'mon, what's up?", his hand ran up and down your arm in a soothing manner.
Invading your space and being overly touchy usually meant that he was tipsy. But to be fair, you were a bit tipsy too.
"Do you ever think about dating?"
"Who? You?", he chuckled.
"No, dumbass. I mean in general."
He seemed to sober up a little at the mention of the subject, straightening up a bit as he sat sideways on the couch so he could look at you fully.
"What's got you thinking about that?"
"I don't know ... I'm 26 now. Isn't it time I started settling down? Have someone filling up the other half of the bed," you pondered, feeling a bit pathetic as you did so.
Mingyu let out a quiet sound of confusion, eyebrows furrowed and head leaning to the side in question.
"Isn't that what me and Jungkook are for?"
Not taking him seriously, you chuckled and took a swing of your almost empty bottle of soju.
"I'm serious, Mingyu. I mean a romantic relationship, where, you know, it's just us and we do couple things and we settle down and all that stuff."
"What can you do with some guy that you couldn't do with us?", he grabbed both your drinks and set them on the table.
Suddenly, his demeanor seemed a bit more serious, which confused you.
Where the hell was Jungkook with those drinks?
"I- Are you serious? Do you need me to tell you?"
"Yeah, I mean, why would you need to look for some guy if you have us?"
Oh. He was serious.
"Because we're friends?," you were beyond confused, "I can't go out with you romantically, or move in with you, or," you gulped, "or sleep with you."
"You can't?", he scoot closer to you.
"Mingyu ..."
"I just mean ... Why would you go after some loser when we can just take care of you?", his hand went back to touching you, though this time it ran up and down your thigh rather than your arm. That false semblance of innocence was gone, "You want someone to keep your bed warm? You don't even have to ask ... I'll do it- we'll do it."
Through his short speech, he got closer and closer, just as the air in the room got heavier. The atmosphere itself shifted dramatically, specially with Mingyu so close to you.
Mingyu was the touchiest man you'd ever known. Being his best friend, you had fallen victim to his touchy demeanor endless times, but never like this. Never while his eyes were hooded and heavy with some emotion you'd never seen in them before.
"Gyu, I-"
"Can I show you?", he rasped, eyes now on your lips.
"Y-you're drunk," you were sure that must've been it. The combination between drinking and talking about dating must've short circuited his brain.
"Just tipsy ... Tipsy enough to get the balls to tell you how much I want you ... but lucid enough to remember how many times I've thought about this."
The hands on your thighs moved to your waist, closing in on you, slowly pulling you toward him. By the end of it, you were halfway sitting on his lap.
"You've thought about this?"
Your nervous hands went to his shoulders for support, easily giving in to him.
"So many times. Jungkook too," he chuckled as he began burying his head in your neck, lips ghosting the sensitive skin.
Lacking any control of your body, you repositioned yourself to allow him better access to you, now fully on his lap as he sat sideways on the couch, arms wrapped fully around you and face buried in your neck.
"Gyu, I-"
"Yeah? Is this okay? Is it okay if I kiss your neck like this? This is what you wanted, right? Someone to take care of you?", he mumbled as he made his way to your ear with breathy kisses.
You were burning up, completely powerless to Mingyu. It was kind of embarrassing how easily you gave in to him. How you had been entirely unaware of his want for you until five minutes ago, yet you were now pliant in his hold, willing to listen to his senseless argument about him and Jungkook being good replacement for a relationship. You also had that to think about – the Jungkook aspect of it all.
The reminder of Jungkook's presence woke you up a bit, remembering that you were literally sitting on your best friend's lap while in your other best friend's living room.
With half a mind to let Mingyu do whatever he wanted to do with you, you powered your way through your decision to pull him away from your neck.
"Gyu, wait. Kook could get here any minute-"
"Don't stop on my account. Seemed like you were having fun without me."
Your head snapped to the door at the introduction of the raspy voice of your best friend, finding said friend leaning against the doorframe with a few drinks in one hand and a few ramen cups stacked on the other.
"Jungkook-"
"So, can someone catch me up?", he got closer, dropping off all the food he was carrying on the table and sitting next to you on the couch.
...
read today on ko-fi or patreon by subscribing to either one<3
NOTE: it wont let me reply to people anymore but ill be tagging everyone who comments asking to be tagged just letting u guys know<3
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toots-senpai · 1 year
Text
Stability (Simon 'Ghost' Riley X Reader)
Authors Note: first legit fanfiction of another masked man??? more likely than you think bb. so so i'm making a part 2 this is 2 gory for legitimate smut. i wonder if this is good or adhd writing tbh i'll never know til y'all say so give a nice yelp review pls. also this is kinda unedited.
Author: @toots-senpai
Fandom: call of duty: modern warfare
Pairing: simon "ghost" riley x reader
Rating: R 18+
Word Count: 13.4k (longest fic thus far)
Warnings: gore, military related themes, guns, explosion mention, small nsfw shower scene, beating torture and cannibalistic torture, blackmail, human trafficking, agnst if you squint and blink, stalking, kidnapping
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even though you've worked alongside ghost for a couple of years before you decided to settle down yourself, it doesn't help the anxiety of how long it takes for him to come back. the house itself squeals through the highrise building in loneliness and the water out of your faucets echo throughout the apartment. this beautiful apartment on a high floor with a dog the same size as you who sits at your front door and wags his tail when people walk by in the hallway every night until they close their door behind them might be starting to get to the two of you mentally. you know he experiences your same feelings when he's gone for longer than usual. he knows simon's schedule on all of his paws down to his tail and he starts to get antsy when he's gone for longer and is always on alert when you go for runs. he's always seems to be hoping to see simon, stopping abruptly when he smells gunpowder on others hoping its him. that has gotten you into multiple awkward and even scary situations maybe a bit too much recently. the city is a dangerous place full of dangerous people but here in this apartment it feels only slightly safer but when you stay in the house you start to get antsy, so it's morning runs from now on only but this life of being alert is tripping you out. simon has snuck up behind his precious dog once on your morning run, fresh from the job and scaring the absolute shit out of his so called scary protective puppy which resulted in him cuddling the dog all night on the couch as an apology on the couch and when he tried to sneak back into bed the dog jumped onto the front of the bed for the first time and neither of you had the courage to move the poor pup. instead you left him to sleep through the morning. only with simon and his dog is your small little family at peace.
though it was cute at the moment you wish he hadn't done it, all he does now is search for simon every run. stopping in the middle of streets and on your abandoned hike trails. you'd wish he'd be a normal dog and chase a squirrel or something but instead he'll jerk you out of a mid run to sniff something random out, fire victims, heroin users is his favorite at night to bark at in the abandoned buildings when he runs away out of your grasp. this time he was ecstatic about whatever smell he just hunted out and he was pulling you fast along the pebbly trail you couldn't get a grip just to stand still on so you let him go, which was probably the dumbest thing you could've done as you watched him run off. his big paws made him look dumb even as he ran away with his ears flopping and easily up the small bushed hill. you sighed out of anger going to take the tiny rocks out of your shoes before calling out for the dog, walking up the bushy hill to a small dirt path away from the trail. the building up ahead was probably a powerhouse which hadn't been checked on in awhile, you couldn't see it from where you stood. you had a gun in your waist trainer and you slipped it out easily as you moved up the small hill. you were starting to get frustrated truthfully but thankfully he got stuck on some branch in one of the bushes, he knew not to tug when he was caught in something but when being handled by his owner he'd tug happily apparently.
"Oh scout you're such a baby." You couldn't help but mutter as you put your gun back to get him out only for him to attempt to drag you again just to be halted by your much firmer grip on the ground. "Enough of that." You ordered as you re-adjusted yourself to try to start to tear him away from the smell he was still insistent about but he whined and tugged until once again getting successfully getting lose only to stutter where he was going and yelp into a growl and when you stumbled forward he even pushed you back a bit by how fast he got in position to protect. You would've just stumbled into this man's chest if it wasn't for scout alarmingly barking at the man startling him enough to trip over his own feet and fall back onto his ass stunned. You grabbed scout's leash and pulled him back to sit but he continued to growl and moved between your legs instead, something simon must've taught him. you pay no mind to it as you look down at the man in front of you, he didn't have on an outfit that would like he worked here but he looked like he knew what he was doing. probably a special worker for this establishment but it does seem a bit off, scuff marks all over his face as if he was a mechanic of some sorts but you don't mention it.
"I'm sorry just walk around us, he's not going to budge from where he's at I really don't have control over this big boy!" You chuckle light-heartedly rubbing scout's neck attempting to calm him down from his defensive procedure by grabbing his leash with a tense pat but he doesn't let down and even tenses more when this man stared at you. you want to take back what you set earlier about whishing simon didn't run in on your run that day, you wish for him to do it right now if he could. not saying you couldn't handle yourself but the way his cold eyes stared at you like he had just scored some information scared you and scout not backing down is keeping your hair against your skin raised but if it wasn't for him you don't know how else you would've gotten out of this situation. scout started moving before you did keeping his position between your legs as he made you walk backwards onto the bushy ground once more, keeping a snarl on his teeth as he paced back with you until you made some distance from the man starting to sit up but scout started pulling you along the gravel once more and all you could do was try to keep up with him and not let the leash hurt your hand before you could even try to look back to the man with the deadly stare. now it's all you can think about when you look down at the dog by the door, swirling the tea bag in your mug around. what was he sniffing and what could've happened if scout didn't move you away? what if you were truly by yourself? probably murder was the only answer you could come up with regardless for any question. a shower couldn't shake away the thoughts and the atmosphere of your precious space was alert.
the next morning is the same as far as you can tell, an insomnia smoothie at 4am looking at the burner phone ghost gave you on the counter and back out to run at 5am. you didn't take one of the abandoned trails this time. in your eyes, simon's training isn't going 100% but that's okay because scout's still technically a puppy you remind yourself as you watch him make a tiny tumble out of the trunk. almost a year and his paws are just a tad too big for his legs. usually its a run but this time, you just wanna walk, relax a bit and breathe away the stress caught in your throat. music is in your ears and there's a coffee from the only open bakery in town at this hour. the coffee is dull and too hot and unfortunately you already wish you hadn't gone out. watching the sunrise from over the hills of the park was pretty and all but your safety still wasn't intact from what you know yet you will still sit on the bench with your knees up and scout loosely held by his leash next to you rolling in the grass. you are determined to read in the park today instead and nothing is going to stop you that's for sure. reading an ebook with your music playing lowly is helping you forget about the humid morning. the leash is long and you can see scout out of your peripheral. your interest on him only peaks when he tippy taps, not an excited one, he's revving up for something and look up to look where he's looking you see the man from yesterday.
maybe it's just the human act to be ignorant towards red flags because even though his stare is colder today you thought that there was a chance that he didn't even know who you were still he does try it as he grabs a bouquet out of his jacket and attempts to hand to you a bit closer than comfort only for scout's jaw to snap at him, almost biting his hand. the man scoffs at the dog and tosses the bouquet on the floor carelessly as he stomps away without even a look back at you and you figure that's enough of the park today. you pick up the flowers anyway, and think about giving it to the neighbor since you know she loves getting some of the flowers that simon sends sometimes but you wish that this bouquet was never offered to you in the first place when you think back to it. when you walk up to the hallway to see this bouquet in multiple other arrangements you already know they're sent by simon. the flowers in your hand is one of the bouquets that's missing from one of the vases. this guy knows where you live and scout knows too when he sniffs the vase growling. you separated the flowers anxiously outside your apartment making sure there was nothing in the around a hundred flowers before taking them in. you call security at the front desk and try to get to simon or price but their phones aren't even on and goes straight to voicemail.
later you checked for airtags on the car and let scout wander without the leash to watch your surroundings as you checked down in the parking garage. your gun is in your hand behind your thigh behind public sight and scout growls next to you, a man walking nearby. you think he's not to suspicious but you have to take the elevator with him which you chose was stupid. once again in your eyes there was nothing you could've truly done to prevent this, everything was aligned for you to get stuck in this position you think. you were looking out for yourself and even if you had gotten in the elevator with him, who knows if he'd be the same people that are now walking towards you one of them scratching the body of someones car. you ran to the stairs and shoved into someone which was a quick shot for you and when looking back you saw that he wasn't a form of civilian anyways as his friend pulled out a gun behind you to shoot and only have his wrist basically ripped by scout who immediately runs back to you after he ripped opened his wrist. you went up a couple floors before you got onto one and caught the elevator with scout where you went back down to the garage to get on the road.
your mom's is probably the safest compared to your flat. you left everything up in the house and you locked it before you left but who knows if they're there. you left your phone and the burner so if anyone wanted to get to you, there was nothing. this is not the way you wanna be spending your night. you have an emergency old id and wallet full of a little money in your glovebox but no phone will suck. you drove out of the city before stopping at a restaurant for a phone. soap was the only number you knew by heart without your phone, purely because he answers more than simon which is more than true when he answers but there's nothing but bullets richocheting off of whatever was close and hearing the phone drop as they made their way out of whatever area. you're fucked.
---------
simon pov
he's taken his way through this small evacuated city a couple times already, helping innocents and chasing after his objective and once he finished he was less than relaxed. a plethora of missed calls from you on the burner and only two towards his direct and you went silent for the last week. your location hasn't moved from the house in days and for some reason all of the hidden cameras he had around the house was down and the burner was tracking it's way through the city streets with no answer when he called. definitely not like his girlfriend. only two things left, scout he checked first, tagged in the collar was a state away from the house, at your mothers? what were you doing by the woman you've avoided the past couple of years, how desperate were the two of you? he's on edge, his foot tapping as he searches through his contacts an old messages trying to get in contact with you through someone of your friends. soap stands in front of his light and his eyes snap up to meet his and instead meeting soap's phone, cracked in his hand with the burner number blowing up his phone. a ransom in his messages and some other bullshit, it was a day to fly to get to you, he's antsy already watching the minutes past as he listens to the turbulence. he couldn't even drink water knowing you weren't okay, his mind ran wild and every emotion he's ever experienced goes through his head, silent underneath his mask as he watches the trackers move, he's in shock when you and the dog are moving rather fast through the forest. you're running fast, his blood is running cold.
----------
y/n's pov
it was a bad idea, terrible idea, your mother has been dead for god knows how long and you didn't know. and now here you were stuck out in buttfuck forest nowhere with your tires slashed when you walked back out of the new occupants home. a couple of shots rang through the new elderly couples home and you already started running down the road as fast as you could before the second one, scout fast at your tail. you're sweating already as you make your way into the nearby city, dawn creeping as if you aren't wanted by someone out there searching for your face. you appreciate your morning runs but as the sun is rising too fast now you still haven't slept on top of all this besides the resting area two days ago. you need to get away from whoever the fuck is chasing you, find somewhere to stay until morning. but you're hungry from running through the forest all night, scout's had his fill of rabbit while you tried to sleep in the trees halfway through the night, it was a tad too gruesome for you to sleep after hearing him mutilate the bunny with the sun hot so you walk into the city while his mouth is still messy. you have your wallet and money still but no communication. no credit card means no rental car and you do not need to bring yourself into any businesses for longer than 5 minutes with your name attached to anything and a bloody dog. you still got some breakfast and cleaned him up before you made your way up to one of the buildings by the highway up to the roof where and you sit on the edge watch as planes fly over you and the cars fly by. You wish that one of them will be a militia plane and simon would parachute and land ontop of you but instead the sun is starting to get hot up here and scout is antsy.
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simon's pov
his mind hasn't stopped wandering since he's been watching you move. he wonders if you got his flowers and a letter he wrote to you when he couldn't stop thinking about you one night. far too romantic and a bit corny in his opinion when he re-read it in the morning, all that matters is that you enjoy his thoughts not him. he's shaking his leg and he's even more tired than you were, he wonders if you're injured. he's going to land farther away from you and his leg starts to tap once again before soap speaks up next to him.
"what about her phone. i've never even seen her with it not attached to her pockets and the fact that she just left it is a little mind boggling.."
"worried about breaking it maybe? she knew she was going to get into some sort of trouble? she would've taken her phone.."
"distracted?"
"by possibly what?"
"maybe she felt sketched out to go back in the house, went out to grab something and ran into something along the way?" it's silent between the men for a second thinking about how to plan this out probably. soap just wants him to think rationally so he doesn't get himself killed, not thinking that it's a chance but he will get injured if they don't have backup plans. "i'll go back to your apartment, check it out."
"the burner?"
"price will handle it."
"alright then."
-----------
y/n's pov
a human with only a water bottle and gun holstered with a dog with blood still clumped in his fur is definitely an interesting look. no one has called the cops though, even as you walk through the city and scout does really good navigating through the small crowds that cover the outside of bars no one is suspicious. the sun is setting soon and you can only imagine how far you've gone and yawn as scout's tail wags and his nose sniffs the air. and he stops walking and starts tippy tapping and sitting with his tail wagging viciously, you can hear the apc before it pulls up next to you and out comes your knight in dark armor, balaclava covering his face and a warm stare of relief before his dog stands on his hinds as he puts his paws on his chest licking and nipping at his mask.
"where's the harness i got him?"
"you got him a harness!?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
the apc is bustling down the empty highway to intercept soap a state over and the evening still burns the clouds as the sun peaks out from the heavy rain. the scenery is nice but scout doesn't like the sound of the rain on the metal vehicle going faster than the speed limit, the rain hits like bullets and he whimpers underneath the arms of the two bulky men who pet him, gaz calming him down by patting his butt softly next ghost. "you never thought to at least check them over before you kept moving?"
"i didn't even want to pay attention to who was following me. didn't even know how many there were.. how'd you find me ghost?"
"scout. tracker."
"ooo spooky. like watching me and your pretty little dog in your spare time my secret admirer? is there a hidden camera in the collar?"
"no, too busy to keep up with you two handsomely famous influencers. i have a serious life compared to you two to even think of buying a camera for the dog." he jabs kicking your foot slightly from across the bench. he still notices the discomfort in your face, not even your fake smiles even coming to show as you stared down at the dog between the two men.
"i didn't see them walking anywhere anyway? i check my surroundings, ghost. im aware as i can be. i think i ran into them on one of my hikes..."
"you shouldn't be going on those trails by yourself regardless."
"i mean i thought you got me scout for that exact reason.." it's silent for a second, the ride as comfortable as it could be but the energy pretty relaxed.
"scout's trained." simon jokes, sarcasm dripping from his tone. "but scout is actually trained for both of our protection, not just you. trained him with soap. must've got to used to being with both of us or something-."
"all i can think about is how they had to have been watching me... he gave me one of the bouquets that you sent before i even saw them. gave them to me on my run in the park...the public park!"
"it was the same bou-"
"yes ghost! same wrapping, same flowers, missing bouquet in one of the vases in the hallway." the car is silent once more, cadets looks at you with concern but the driver breaks the silence saying that you were 5 minutes away from the location and ghost opens and turns on the communication system.
"soap, come in, over." the station is quiet and so is the car. you start reloading your gun now grabbing some additional armor from one of the nearby crates.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you've never seen your neighborhood like this. it's been a day and it's run down even more than usual. gaz said there was an explosion down the street, terrorism attack on a building a couple days ago and killed alot of people and now the city has lost control of it's people. when the apc stopped someone was already drifting through the streets a cop busting behind him as a full chase. was what happened more than a random occurrence? all of you think not when you get to the garage, ghost's mask is drawn in spray paint and scout sniffed out the guy the guy who attacked you in the hallway, shot probably by his own men because he left of smear of blood from his wrist on his way down. no way that they couldn't of helped him with his wrist that scout mauled, no compassion for even their own people.
"we gotta keep going.." ghost muttered softly walking past you up the stairs with scout following between his legs. you all followed behind until you got to your floor, scout sniffing out the booby traps even at the entrance, mined doors on this side of the stairs of the building so you all went back down and split up coming in through different ways. you and ghost ended up in the elevator without scout because he's afraid to elevators, it's silent as you two make your way up before it suddenly stops to a screeching halt which threw you a bit off balance into simon who caught you by one of his arms which wasn't holding on to his gun. the fire light turned on and the door opened to the elevator, the shaft tall and air rushing up through the gap, his grip tightened a bit as you two backed up and he tried to press the elevator door to no avail. it's cold, the air blowing up through the shaft, there is even a few floors above you. that whistle of air is almost louder than the shots from levels above you and simon can't get through the comms as an emp rung through his ear before he shut it off looking at you.
you're eyes are connected as the shots ring around you from the open shaft. he pulls his balaclava above his mouth as he kisses you sweetly letting his gun hang by the belt as he holds you tight. moments like these keep you on edge as well, you both hear the barks on the level above and scout's barking echoes through the shaft. when the shots became quiet and he let go as quick as he grabbed you. hand pulling down his mask and other arm repositioning at his gun as the elevator shook from someone jumping on it and the emergency door on the top of the elevator cracks open and ghost's muzzle is pressed against soap's leg who is staring down at you two quietly.
"you two lived on top of the guy who planned this all and yes, you were being watched... both of you.. for awhile."
"comprisable?"
"almost."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
your apartment had been ransacked, it was smart to not go back upstairs and just take the high road. he took your belongings and this guy had a really big grudge with ghost. one of the last missions before you retired, your team infiltrated one of the many areas you had in the past but this time this guy had gotten a hold of ghost, kidnapped him and has intel on him somehow, starting off with his precious girlfriend's house shopping. it was all planned pretty well but it's always connected to something bigger. people you've taken out and he's taken out being connected and simon thanks that you don't ever say his name in any texts or your contacts. you can see his eyes beam up as he checks all over your phone seeing nothing incriminating or deceitful that would've helped this guy get more info on you but you know he's kicking his feet and shit in his head since you have gotten back in the apc. his stoic face does not help his happy excited fingers that rub against your hand as you all head to a base back out of the state.
they all connected on the floor and took the hostiles out quite quickly before noticing you both hadn't gotten out of the elevator yet but you still got the majority of your belongs out of there, keeping only a bag of clothes, some books and some small valuables and your precious computer which actually had all of the intel on it. protected by multiple layers of protective passwords which ghost dropped his happy actions at taking his hand back and making you break the silence of the apc filled with only crumpling papers and a roaring tank engine with a giggle. it didn't take long to get out of the apc and onto a base and into a car alone with scout, your belongings are in the trunk and scout has the whole backseat to himself as he looks out of the window searching for simon, pacing back and fourth. you have to get a new phone, the other one is staying on base for monitoring and basically you're fucked for calling anyone. it's not like you have anyone to talk to anyways nowadays with work but still sucks you still can't get it back.
simon opens the driver and slips into the seat and takes a deep breath before looking at you. "he overcharged us by the way on rent.." he jokes but with not a smile from you he continues but looking away. "he was trying to find our names. didn't expect our id's to be fake, not the same guy who stopped you on the run. caught him on a couple of different camera's on the apartment cameras, same guys stealing those navy weapons awhile ago...." he trails off before looking back at scout before back at you. "we'll find somewhere safe to permanently stay if that's what you're worried about?" he says. you could only think he's not used to your silence. it's not him, it's just the need to forget about it all all ready. just the thought about this is overbearing your thoughts but you have to respond to him.
"everywhere we will stay will be farther from you even if i stayed at a base.... should i come back? would it be safer?" you ask him in a low tone and he looks out at the base in front of the steering wheel, hands rubbing the leather wheel slightly.
"do you think it'll be safer.. always being on the move, back on the field? you said you wanted stability. i thought that was our plan?"
"is this stability?" the silence in the car was deafening as the air base around you roared from airplanes and cars that moved around the parking lot. "baby...." you trail reaching out for his forearm and rubbing his wrist looking at him with your lips pressed before continuing. "we have alot of time to calm down but... i need to stay with you. it isn't calm without you."
"are you sure you can handle it again dove? it's draining and even your therapist-"
"i never paid a dime for that, it's just provided and i've handled myself for a long time, i can do it again to stay with you. especially for you.. us. are you afraid of my aim?" you giggle and he relaxes slightly while probably smiling and biting anxiously at his lips underneath the mask still he chuckles. he finally looks at you fully and he squints a bit taking you in for a second and holding the hand that was once touching his forearm rubbing at your fingers.
"did you not get the letter in the flowers?"
"did you put your name or mine on the card?"
"in.. code?"
"what does that mean?"
"a poem.. of sorts.. i'm guessing you didn't get it?"
"no."
"i hope i never find this guy. took away my romantic gesture.."
"i bet simon, your love on a piece of paper is good blackmail may i add but he's not dead? i thought-"
"nope, guys in the parking lot were there holding down the whole apartment, working with the guy on the trail who we can't find who works for someone else...terrible blackmail though even if it said something about our stability together and some other things... almost as if we're on the same page. i hope.." he trails off for a second swallowing and probably pouting as he continues. "it's not blackmail though, i can say it to you now, i remember-"
"i can only imagine what's about to come out of your gorgeous mouth but i would really like to do it later. where are we even going to go?" he's back to rubbing the wheel, probably disappointed about not being able to admit his feelings. he shrugs with his head down and you know he's got alot more to say but he's quiet, mask moving softly. "stop biting at your lips you know it's a bad habit simon."
"i know. i love you, i don't want to mess us up love. i want you to be happy when you wake up. not scared or forced to put on any face that isn't yours." he stops and he's looking at you almost through your skin and his chest is heaving a bit. you know he's pent up under his tactical gear and he needs release mentally and physically. you just can't keep up, this alertness keeps you stressed and with no ground to ground yourself with, how could you truly relax. you wonder if he knows that too as he waits for you make him keep going, waits for you to let him talk and sweeten you up with his words that he doesn't feel like he get's across to you because of how long he's been away. "i will never tell you to not do something when it come's down to how you feel about all of this. if you need me i'll stay, if you want to be with me on the job that's fine. you know the price of what comes along with your actions and any position you choose. any judgement you make i'll respect and work with you through it."
"reassurance? that's all you got? i don't need it. what about what you want to do?"
"anything that's best for us, for you-"
"i get that but like you don't know anything past what i want? it's all just the job and my wants?"
"only when it comes down to our housing truthfully, whatever you pick that far is all i want from you. my needs only last in financial stability and I work quite enough for it plus what you still get as a bonus and my bonuses." he makes you face him, grabbing your chin softly. "please tell me what you'd like to do for the night.." he's pleading seriously, eyes searching yours.
"do you have ideas other than a hotel?"
----------
simon's pov
an airbnb for tonight and a home by tomorrow was the supposed plan but you look like you were still thinking about it. he wonders if you want to live at every base he moves to making him have to work full-time as he pulls out a couple of the important containers from the passenger doors. he enjoys the suv the force offered him while you two moved about and they were even offering to either get the two of you a new one or if he wanted to keep this one but he still doesn't know and he knows you don't either. privacy and protection is important and that is well enough known to the point that it doesn't have to be brought up in the conversation but that doesn't help with privacy and protection at all. he hauls them up this cabin, the air is cold on his forearm's and his mind races as he walks up the stairs, you have the water running in the bathroom for the shower, steam rising out of the door as he puts down your essentials near the door looking at you. scout's got his head in your lap and you still haven't even touched your computer after looking at this one website for housing. he wonders if you're thinking about cities and states or about the future as he walks over to you. you don't even look up at him as he kneels down next to the bed. he rubs the outside of your thigh and your eyes finally meet his, they're a bit glossy as your hands reach out for his face, caressing his cheek and biting your inner cheek.
"thank you for bringing the stuff in, we need to get dog food in the morning and i have food for us coming from someplace on uber. burgers.." you mutter looking up at him. he's so in love with you he could shatter underneath your eyesight and break into a million pieces and let you step all over him and he wouldn't do a thing. he kisses you through his mask on your forehead and you giggle a bit as scout pushes his way up to start licking your face. he pushes the dog softly out of the way by his muzzle and your hands rub up his arms and he's on fire at your small touches and he just nods looking from your lips back to your eyes.
"can i take you to the shower?" you smile again and he's biting his lips again as he stares down at yours who look back wide and full of love through the exhaustion.
"carrying me?"
"of course." he states before ripping you out from under the covers in one go and into his arms. you squeal and protest slightly but he just changes his hold on you instead. he's holding you by your ass and he's kissing you again after yanking it up past his mouth and moaning as you kiss him back. scout tries to follow you two to the bathroom but he gives him a look through the kiss as before he goes in the bathroom back first before closing and pushing you up against the door. buttons in his head clicked quite fast when he takes your wrists up against he door and your wrists are connected with the metal hangers, almost as if it was made for something other than hanging towels. he laughs when you notice and you blush a bit pushing him off of you. as he stumbles he takes off his shoes and walks back up to pull you by your waist into his chest. he loves how malleable you are under his touch and how surprised you are every time he pulls you close, how your eyes dance around him as he strops and your shirt is thrown off your head. he has a craving to hear your laughter all the time, it makes him feel like a class clown and emotionally vulnerable but he gives you his all. every emotion he experiences he's always trying his hardest to make evident especially as he picks you up by your thighs and walks straight into the shower clothes on and lets you get wet first as you spit the water back at him in shock and then reach back to turn it down.
"hot." you state and he nods and gets under with you under the hot water until cools down and you two are centimeters apart. clothes sticking to skin and you run your hands down his wet shirt feeling his toned muscles underneath and you let out a breathy whimper when you feel one of his belts in the way. "too much on still simon." you whisper and he nods feeling his dick twitch at the sight of your pupils widen as you look up at him. "do you need help with that?"
-----------
y/n's pov
you're a bit mad he made you come in the shower with both of you clothed, you can see a mixture of blood and dirt down the drain as he holds you and some of it smears onto your pants as he holds you in his arms squeezing your ass with every movement you've made since being in this position.
"what if there's cameras in this airbnb?"
"free fucking show love." he cuts you off pressing his lips back into yours this time a little rougher. you can't breathe through his rough kiss as his gear digs into your thighs and his cock rubs on of the best acts of friction through his pants and your leggings that you still haven't taken off from your run two days ago. a hand runs up your hips and his kisses are feverish against your jaw as he hold you with his other arm and his knee, keeping you pressed against the plastic of the shower.
"you gotta take it off-"
"not fucking yet don't you interrupt me." he seethes into your ear and it's a genuine grind and a moan as he grinds himself against your cunt and latches his teeth on your neck a couple times while pulling at the fabric of your bra and sucks harshly at the skin between his biting. your hips twitch and your hands grip onto his shoulders as you moan with him, lost in the pleasure as he stays consistent with the grinding against your clothed cunt. he can feel how wet you already are through your wet clothes and truthfully you're too close to skin in your leggings and his pants are in the way. he flips around and puts you behind him as he takes off the wet skin tight long sleeve that was rolled up his forearms and you are taking off a couple of his belts tossing them into the sink with a couple of underhand throws before his pants come down finally as you scowl behind him.
"you didn't even bring my soaps in here..." he sighs deeply while walking outside the bathroom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you two are finally searching through the housing market across the u.s. when the two of you are clean and out of the shower. you lay on his chest and scroll a bit endlessly and sometimes simon says some states but he's been quiet ever since illinois, his head is buried within your neck and he's calm behind you contently rubbing scout's head who lays over the both of your laps. he gives you a few kisses every now and then to the junction of your jaw and you relax, sighing and baring your neck to him. it doesn't take him too long to start to trail his tongue on your neck but you don't think he notices that you're not too excited at the moment and you break the silence as per usual. "i don't want to move anywhere truthfully.." you say and there's nothing but a long stare from him before the doorbell rings and he slips from behind you.
it didn't look like he was to keen on that statement.
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simon's pov
he didn't expect this to be the route you two took a couple of months later, both of you back on the field and his name slowly slipping away from your lips and ghost the only thing he's hearing nowadays once again. you're good at keeping undercover and you were right that this was the best way to do it. scout is an official military dog and has new badges and everything to prove his role in the military, awards from the last couple of missions and now he walks between your legs correctly neither of you missing a beat as you three snuck towards a safe house. you three were somewhere in africa due to an incoming missile towards the cargo plane that was just for trade, but still everyone was forced to evacuate. seconds after your squad deployed parachutes were already being blown out from bullets and people fell faster than they came out of the plane. both you and ghost cut your chutes before they could see you two falling and he had to trust you with every ounce of his being and let you use your other emergency one when once you two got closer to the ground, holding him close through safety belts for the scariest 4 seconds before you finally pulled his chute and his safety belts with both of your hands in one of the fastest motions he's seen. he couldn't pull his own because of the quite large dog he held who panted and moved anxiously in his arms as you three fell through the sky and he had to keep him quiet and content as you two landed. at the end when you three finally landed scout was the only one hurt, probably a sprain in his foot but he refused to be carried. there isn't any form of safehouse nearby either, an abandoned location he knew about but definitely not a full safe house.
now as you two approach someone is getting assassinated in these abandoned ruins, a fire squad releasing multiple shots that echo into the rainforest. matter a fact the old vines that used to crawl from the ground up the trees are are now halfway up the trees. a 'war' or some sort of battle had to have happened for the mud to be this way and the grass to grow this unrapidly. desire paths and blood ransacked the floor and the trees, his heart is running a little faster than usual and anxiety runs through his veins like an infection. both of your comms hasn't gone through since you've landed and when you both look at each other you know that only one of you has to go. it's distract or be taken prisoner in whatever city this is and he knows you have to go. you're better than this, won't be seen as a threat and scout heads underneath his legs before either of you say anything. the plan went smooth enough, both of you still ending up as high alert 'prisoners' but you kept your guns and scout is being seen by medical. they're not too friendly but they don't lack hospitality and he see's that you can be grateful towards them for that. he won't let down his guard even when they offer you both a place to stay, a nearby motel with twin beds as the only thing left. you checked for bugs and he was looking at a map, scout in his lap on the bed and nearby 'neighbors' arguing about drugs and drug money.
two feds next door will do that to hypes and he chuckles listening to their argument with his semi-learnt french and you finally sit down on the other bed pouting. you're hungry and nothing delivers in this type of town and there was nothing even open in town from what you saw when they drove you two to the motel you complained. you also said something about being weirded out that no pubs were open in the town, mentioning no town drunks and now all he can think about is telling you about the high motherfuckers to the left of your room but you don't seem to be in the funny mood. you both went to sleep hungry and in different beds until you got up around 2 and had to snuggle with him for 'warmth' so your comms ringed you both awake with soap's voice ringing both of your eardrums far more awake than you two were even before you two went to sleep, scout whining from the bad at the ring of both of your comms. soap states everyone on your helicopter was probably dead besides the driver who had a terrible concussion and was dragged out of the plane by monkeys as the man said. even soap sounded enthused but apparently was on facetime with him and the bonobo helpers. very interesting, unfortunately you were stuck out here for longer. good news that the people that helped last night are semi-'allies'. some soldier awhile ago had this predicament of getting lost in this jungle and also getting saved by these people.
these allies said something was coming to intercept you but the people at the 'nearby' hq- which was a country away - said it'd be best if you were on the move. so you two walked through the jungle again, neither of you actually wanted to stay in the free motel and rather wanted to be on the move. he can't see how you could see the stability in this, yet he still tries to wrap his head around it. he can't even wrap his head around how only one of the injured people from the plane survived and he brainstorms the whole time as you two walked but a couple of sharp shots from the distance shook you two out of any thoughts that either of you were thinking and you two look at each other. it seems at this very moment the vehicle that was coming to intercept was also coming at the same time, his hand grabs yours quickly and he kisses your hand through the mask before he pulls you out of sight and lets you go as you two split with scout following close behind as you two hide between the darkness of the rainforest. gargled unproperly translated french said something about hostages and soldiers being held in a barn down the road, along with looking for you.
to be fair, translating has become easier when you're being taught by your captors daily between food breaks but still when he thinks back to how you two responded to them driving away and not even checking for the shooter properly he winces and wheezes from the wince. when you two walked to where the shooting happened and there lied one of your comrades who was choking on his own blood and probably alerted the shooter who wasn't on said truck that drove away.
he can translate all of it now, their entire conversation front to back, they've used the whole recorded conversation from their comms play on repeat while they beat him once, translating all of it towards his unlearned french and taught him quickly through it all, they've been watching you both for the longest. he has never spoke to them, never letting a word even slip from his mouth as they screamed and tortured him day and night and all he can do is wonder where you went every time he see's the moon rise through the small crevice of the celled window. that night they tracked both of you down through the rainforest and told the already reinforcements that were on the way that you were by yourselves and when they surrounded you, guns at every corner of his vision and scout being shot multiple times when he went after the men and hearing his dog's struggles and your screams while he struggled against three men who shot him up with something that still makes him hazy after all these weeks, it makes his blood burn. your screams echo and watching you cry for scout and pull him towards you was the only thing he remembers as his vision faded to black. he get headaches wondering if you're still alive and he wonders if you two are just m.i.a on a cold case. he dry weaves sometimes at that thought and these men scoff at him for being so week after their endless torture with weak laughs. he's not thinking straight.
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y/n's pov
you on the other hand know everything that has been happening. scout's alive but barely and all of the people you wondered where they were lay in these stables, citizens of this small town they keep you with when they're done with you. you're beaten for livestreams for your superiors and ransoms are being passed around like hall passes. you've watched your superiors get close a couple of times, only twice if we don't count you blindfolded hanging from the rooftop as multiple men threw blows at your stomach that had you hurling off the edge more than you already were as you choked on your own blood. only a rope held your wrists tied behind your back and only pulled slightly by one man who doesn't care if you fell as he watches when you hunched over with blood spilling from your mouth with every blow and statement of unmerciful threats from you captors screamed across the forest around you in victory when they first tried to infiltrate this base. victorious they left you on the roof for days, broken ribs and blood dried and caked into your wounds and your face as drones focused on you in the distance. a base across the forest created alot of light pollution, and enough of it had them throwing you back downstairs into these said stables. these stables were underneath this house in the rainforest and sometimes you could swear you heard simon through the floorboards above you as the innocent people around you flinched at every blow towards whoever sits in these chairs above you.
they screech from their chairs, multiple people and sometimes they're thrown into this infectious stable and sometimes these people let them rot if they didn't know that they would've died from the injuries, they don't care at all, they don't even have a motive from what you know thus far. there are other of your comrades down here, tortured or starving along with the town drunks to the religious fanatics who are overly pessimistic towards the young women whose children are dying from sicknesses that these people don't even bother to care about. the mothers help you out the most and body huddles happen around you with children for warmth. you've been beaten past the point of walking at this point and everyone is silent in almost a silent apology every time they throw you down here worse than you were before. it's only been a month and a half since you've been captured.
honestly you don't even wanna think about the whimpers from everyone every time you're dropped on the floor, the whimper from your dying dog getting more silent every time. the kids are taking care of him you're pretty sure. you watched that night as they threw him in the back of the trunk like roadkill onto your hallucinating body after shooting him and your vision was fading long before you could register that you were drugged and also probably dragged like roadkill. the drag towards the 'medic' of the town who was also another drunk they let cold turkey off the alcohol was probably the meanest man you ever met out of the bunch, every drag felt like needles and the sharpest of grass every time they threw you down here and the humidity of the stables create a more putrid smell than any garbage bag could or even the thick smell of gunpowder on other occasions. it was harder to breathe this time around the drag felt like nothing and your skin was numb but your broken ribs sliding across the ground was worse than being able to breathe, the pain put you in a state of almost shock as the man examined your body. you'll seethe and scream through every bone he could recrack back into the position.
you've seen plenty of what the captors can do to you and the people around you but this night they wanted you to know more. the door shakes this house when one of them slams it open and everyone moves away from you as they walk over and pick you up. he throws your battered body over his shoulder and you wonder if they're dragging simon behind you right now. afterall he's big like simon but in this state of pain you couldn't really realize who they dragged behind you by their throat. you can't even try to move as they place you in a different vehicle, so weak that they place you in the middle of two men in the backseat and don't even cover your face as they laugh at you as you fade in and out of consciousness. overstimulating to say the least with the pounding headache and they just throw you out of the vehicle with the man next. he's got his cuffs locked behind his back and you have the need to sleep through this pain, your body can't stay awake and you can't beat how soft the ground is even if the muddy gravel that was digging into your cheek. so when you open your eyes the second time it's actually dawn instead of dark and you are stuck in the middle of nowhere the person previously in the cuffs in front of you gone. an old cabin lies in front of you and now everything clicks as to what they actually held besides the five comrades at their base. there was ghost stories being said by the old woman day and night of a building which had blood seeping out of their doors and you can see it from where you lay on the ground, along with an eyeball.. fresh. you don't have to guess from where when you sit up and see part of the man who previously was there in front of, pieces of bone from his skull scattered on the floor and dragging away to the door.
you debate going inside and almost leave before you hear crying to your left, head snapping to connect eyes with a little girl at the doorway of said cabin. tears ran down her cheeks and there wasn't a spot on the little one that didn't basically drip or stick of blood, behind her wasn't any better. the shed door is slid open and machines used for woodwork have human body parts littered across them and blood dripped off the table continuously. you slowly went to grab the little girl, pulling yourself off the ground and dragging yourself towards the girl and she comes up to pick you off the ground, coming up off the ground the cabin just held more horrors the more sight you gained, a jail cell and a deep freezer in the back. no one is in this building besides whatever you think is in that meatlocker and all you could do is wince as you pulled yourself up against the doorframe and grabbed the little girl in your arms and pulling her through the wet forest. you can feel the blood on her smear across your bruised skin and you're forcing your entire body going to make it to where ever you need to make sure this little girl will be safe. it doesn't take to long to realize that you aren't anywhere.
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simon's pov
his blood still boils at every movement, said kidnappers tried the whole hanging him off the ledge but price worked harder this time at infiltrating this base and his lieutenant only made it easier. apc's, helicopters and an army of armed soldiers surrounded the armed base and once ghost had a gun in his hands on said roof after all these weeks of torture it was over. the aftermath is knowing his dog was dying and no one knowing where you were besides the lady who spilled stories from her dementia arcade and now you were the only one truly m.i.a. and cold. it's already been 2 weeks since the infiltration of this base and you've been gone for 2 and a half apparently. they record their comms but trackers are useless and now there's a full blown war between the black market entrepreneurs and the american military, everyone knows they're hiding more than drugs but here back at this 'new base' in the middle of the droc's territory with their only jurisdiction being you as the only missing soldier there's nothing that can legally keep them in droc much longer, afterall no one wants some sort of civil war. the thought that he might have to leave you after looking day and night for the past couple two weeks tears away his will to eat and he's going destructive on himself mentally but soap trying to help the best he can.
he's trying to appreciate what he can since everyone has been whispering that you're probably dead all day around him and alcohol made him cry for the first time in awhile so he hasn't even bothered to drink his favorite bourbon. crying over his dying dog and his missing girlfriend after he trudged his way in the empty infirmary and petting his nose and whispering affirmations of how much he craved the old life he once had. his thoughts run marathons of what you said to him about craving stability and no matter what he knows he can't bring that to you now. he's slowly starting to blame himself for it all, in these marathons he wonders if he heard you at night getting beaten. when they force their jurisdiction making him go back to main hq back in the u.s back in the main base he fills your room with himself and scout every night. his face burys itself into your pillows and he craves your scent that's gone from the sheets and he gave up his room for yours since everyone thinks your dead. a month has gone by and now he's on a 'suicide watch' from soap, he doesn't remember what he did the night before, hooked up on whatever he decided he was drinking at the bar but in the hospital room he woke up with his hands covered with bandages and price has to stop his best man from going crazy that night through his first genuine breakdown in the hospital. he had a rescue mission back to the droc approved for your capture in two days.
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y/n's pov
why could you have thought you could've ran away you think now. you think of if there's a city nearby and you wish that simon would brake the chains that hang around your ankles. you wish much more of simon even though you know that he would rub your bruised muscles and tend to your sores with a cup of tea for you to relax while he did it. he'd kiss around the mud and blood that stuck to your form and hold you close while he showered with you. scrubbing and kissing until the grime was nothing but dirt sticking inside the drain pumps until it drained to the sewers. you wouldn't even need to ask, no words would be said until you'd finally cuddle up to the dear man and cry yet your fingers shake as the false memory fades from your vision. in your eyes your hands you hold a hammer and blood drips down the whole mallet and off your fingers. below your hands lay your captor this time and your ears gain back some of their hearing from you basically blacking out in anger and the girl next to you quietly sobbing behind you before running to get this guy's keys in the office.
you don't even remember if this is all his blood, you've been a captive in this shed since he grabbed you that day. you hadn't gone a mile before he noticed you with 'his girl' and beat you until you woke up with chains around your limbs in the middle of the night. your skin feels like it's his at this point, it's clammy and now like the little girls even though hers is worse. he kissed you two sometimes when he walked past the two of you these last couple of days, rubbing your shoulders with his dirty hands and even going so far as to lick blood from the people you've been skinning. while you were doing this he would chuckle almost as this was some form of sick amusement throughout his 'teachings'. you know he's touched the little one in some ways and she doesn't even flinch when he rubs her. you haven't slept and he kept you up with whatever drug he was able to put in the slop he serves or needles he shoves into your arms. some of the bodies here were people from the city you could only guess and others were human trafficking victims. back in the infection cabin that you once lay after being tortured for those weeks was only practice for the true smell that you've grown accustomed to. the blood that drips off your skin and the horrors of gutting people are a sin only something higher should be allowed to do.
you truly know that this was the only way to stop all of this. there's been no help anyways all this time and you know no one would help you. you know beyond the fantasy realm that truth that simon would probably not want to go into this building and or even touch you from the smell you've been stuck in, the blood that drips from your skin and the skinnyness of your bruised body. your superiors would look at you strangely and puke as they knew you killed and skinned people for what you hope is the black market but you don't know as much as you did back at the infectious cabin but the little girl who steps over the man infront of you does. you wonder if she knows too much, the pout of concentration on her face was all of her effort and she's trying so hard to stop her hands from shaking and her face doesn't even falter as she takes the bloody hammer from you and lets it fall like it weighed nothing onto the dead man's stomach. it's disgusting almost how this was muscle memory to her even through her shaky hands, the thought that she's tried getting out of here plenty of times as she unlocks the massive amount of locks on the chains around your ankles and wrists quite expertly and fast and even goes to try to grab you when your body finally relaxes really is making your stomach curl. once she realizes that you can relax comfortably and you lean into the bloodied table in front of you she tries to let you but the floor takes you down with it regardless. the slip isn't hard it's in fact very slow and the blood pile on the floor is bleeding into the roots of your hair as you watch the girl go and save the newcomers that just came in this morning. they're not dead but it's a fact that they would've been as they are freezing as they come out into the main area.
a woman gets excited seeing your uniform but when she looks at you all she does is sigh and pull you up from the bloody floor. once she's sat you down near the wall she cuddles up to you for warmth, none of the blood on you matters and she knows you did the final blow when she starts to clean you with her very cold shirt which felt very nice on the bruises that litter your skin. you're sore and this woman is softly going around all of the swollen areas without missing a beat. some people push out the little girl out of the freezer and there's around 15 of you now. some people come around you two to cuddle for warmth again and pull you out of the blood pile and some are trying to break into this side office. three out of the seven are trying to break down the door and the others back away from the door watching the others go to try again but some harsh brakes of a car squeal into the small cabin interrupting everyones actions. it stops in front of the shed and everyone quiets as multiple people talk outside. they're loud as they walk to the door and the little girl is the first one to move, running and hiding away in one of the cabinets while others grab medical equipment and hide away back into the freezer. you slip out of sight it's only quiet for a minute max while everyone grabs weapons before the door slides open and a couple of gunshots start to ring through the air, hitting walls and sliding people down the walls and someone started one of the three chainsaws fully but you heard the other two stutter and heard them struggling. all you could do was drag yourself into better cover and watch as one of the men who came in with guns catch your sight and aims only to get a saw ripped through his chest.
it was too fast for you to even comprehend, your body is on survival mode and adrenaline is ripping through your flight or fight as a saw sprays his blood over the shed causing your brain to stall as you closed your eyes and push yourself of the ground only to slip once again in the previous bloody chain pile. you have no strength to push yourself up but a chill of death forces you to protect yourself now otherwise you won't get another chance to. you flip with the chains that were once attached to your body in your hands and this saw catches the chains and blood spits at you once more along with sparks. they're too big to get caught in the moving track but it's making a disgusting noise and sparks fly into to your face as you push the chains up against the saw with a stomach grounded scream as you feel your muscles almost ripping from the lack of strength you have while you're pushing back. your screams penetrates the walls and echoes out of the windows across the forest to open ears searching for the bullets that ran through the forest earlier.
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simon's pov
price had been watching movement for awhile since they approved this mission after the droc took over that base. besides having alot of the missing personnel and weapons they left their comms completely open. price would listen to comms with simon for hours in the hospital while they worked through files instead of at the nearby base and a couple of days ago they said something about coordinates and sending someone to pick up meat. it didn't take long to realize that they weren't talking about the classic dairy that moves around the country. it was easy to make this mission a success yet there's something bugging him. their comms went dead one way and when they were almost to the coordinates the other side started trailing someone for a bit and during that, they caught their location quick. they were quiet around the forest and they blended in even with the snaps of sticks underneath their boots and this group of soldiers only moves faster when these shots rang through the forest towards the coordinates.
the shed was just ahead and a shrill sound of metal against metal is ringing just as loud through the forest as it rings in that shed, ringing loud enough to not hear you screams of pain. the group of the small military surround the building and come in from different angles. people go in through the office and the side windows and with the door already being open all it took was two steps to get in the shed and one bullet from soap's gun to the back of the man's skull to stop whatever was happening in the middle of the bloodied floor and a couple of other bullets to help some of the people struggling on the floor. bodies fall and the saw moves in circles wrapped in chains on the floor until someone stops it and all of the personnel in the shed take in the bloodied environment. a wheeze underneath the body of the sawman had price picking up the man by his shoulder and tossing it off of you. you, who had blood soaked into their clothes and bruises and fresh and dry blood surrounded all over the tears. the rest of all of the survivors walk out of the 'meat' freezer in amazement and the little girl runs up to you and pulling the bloody hair out of your face before walking to the office door which opens by one of the soldiers who got in through the window. the soldier basically runs out of the shed to puke and a putrid smell takes over the murky iron in the air.
the little girl doesn't care about the smell but she does start to cry when she looks through the door and simon watches as you wince and look away when she starts to sob at the picture in front of her. he rushes over to you now picking you up by your arm carefully before draping it over his shoulder with your codename on his tongue and you give him one of the most exhausted looks he's ever seen. you try to ask him about what's in the room and he knows you won't be awake long enough to listen anyway and he gives you an infamous kiss through his mask. you're in really bad shape and you need to relax and even your body craves it from the lack of color in your skin besides bruises and the way you start to drift off even here in his arms. its a mental block truly and one hundred percent his own muscle memory that makes him carry you better even if you're tinier than usual, the moment you're starting to slip he grabs you bridal style as if he's done it hundred of times before and you are asleep in his arms and relief is washing over his body like a drug. all of the squadron around the two of you are in awe at the blood they see on the walls, the people in the freezer and the survivors and dead bodies and what not but it's not his job to be focused on that at the moment. it's his job to focus on you even if when he turns to look at your face again the little girl is crying next to your face as he carries you, hand on your hair and crying about you being dead or whatnot and price separates her from you before he can say anything and his blood is cooling and the sun is shining a bit warmer.
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y/n's pov
the bed is comfy and you still feel exhausted regardless of how long you've been sleeping. you don't even want to recognize times and dates and your body was still sore as you moved from your side. you moved to get more comfortable to sleep more but there were three excited sounds around you when you moved. a shuffle from probably simon who sat at the chair in this infirmary and the little girl who gasped and sat up from her chair fast to come and walk over to your face and scout with a huff and a soft place of his head on your stomach now that you've flipped to your back. when you open your eyes you are eye to eye with the little girl, she's been crying excessively from the redness around her eyes and you know that she's nothing but an orphan now. the first time she talked was three days after your capture, the little girl was begging you to eat the 'food' in front of you, which you knew for a fact wasn't normal meat before you even saw it from the smell it made while the man was cooking. she begged you not to starve yourself and probably didn't want you to end up like her mom who was locked in that office. she told you that she needed to feed her mom and that all the man did was stay and guard the place, more so while you and her worked on the human meat cutting day and night. that was all that he fed also and you heard her mother didn't want to eat it for a long time. she grimaced in disgust and threw plates of food to be kicked by the man and when you started to not eat what the man placed in front of you she cried. there was a common ground of knowing how much you could truly handle when you got your hands on him the very first time when he grabbed you two out of the forest. he was big but if you had muscle and the previous starvation of the cabin didn't impact your throws you still would be in this same bed at the end of the day.
your eyes lock to simon and his are locked on the little girl who stares at you intensely in terrifying concern. there's a tenderness in his eyes and you know that he probably just couldn't handle the emotionless smart little girl. you couldn't either back in the shed.
"your mother? she didn't make it?" you mutter and she bows her head and walks away from the bed. when you try to sit up scout gives you a deep growl, not threatening but a small order that you shouldn't move due to the state of your body.
"scout's healing he hasn't moved from you since you've got back. three day sleep and we all slept together last night. we're keeping her. i'm learning to love the little shit. even if she's been a handful and a half, she distracts me." he states when as he scoots closer and kisses your iv'd hand.
"she's traumatized."
"i can tell. a great addition to our little family."
"glad to know we've trauma bonded.. she wants to stay?"
"she hasn't complained about it. no way she doesn't understand. she's 12. both of them are dead and you're out of the field from here on out again. no more." he's firm as he slides keys into your hand with a cute keychain that have car and house keys. "i looked this time and it's big and by the lake in illinois. just something to start maybe? when you get better of course you can move where ever else you want to. where ever we want to." he suggests keeping his hand on yours. "i'm in therapy, like you suggested but for other reasons of course. im on leave."
"gotta take pride that you didn't listen to me riley."
"you never listen to me either, hypocrite." he laughs, putting his clothed cheek on your hand and you can feel his relieved smile on his cheeks and see it in the way he closes his eyes. it stays like this for awhile, the two of them cute and sleeping together every night in the small chairs and all eating together in the small infirmary before you're able to leave. the three of you are a cute family for the past year. simon actually had alot of therapy he didn't mention, a 'punishment' from price so his afternoons are occupied. you didn't mind too much honestly, you enjoy the sight of the balaclava in the morning at your kitchen table when he's drinking tea in a tight t-shirt and after his evening workouts in the home gym before he finds you around the house. morning 'yoga' you and little nakimera and he always let you rip off the mask when he gets home after long afternoon meetings and loves to slip a room away from the little girl who is preoccupied by her sketchbook to lovingly complain between kisses about you ripping off his mask while cornering you. anti privacy tint outside all of the windows, a 2 car garage and a room that locked away all of the house weapons in the garage. you two have made the house beautiful and all three of you even worked on the backyard, a beautiful private patio that covers the jacuzzi in the back and opens with blinds to look out at the backyard. the dream simon provides you leaves your blood on fire and your heart thumping every once in awhile.
he always takes you in as you lay in your underwear scribbling away in the bedroom and you can always seem him out of your peripheral. his eyes are caught in the fairly lights and fake leaves that hang from the ceiling like stars or fireflies or something and he admits in the late of nights that he never really knew what you were going for there but it worked on making you look godly. even now when he could feel how tense it felt in the house when he snuck in the afternoon a bit too late. the bedroom door is wide open and scout doesn't bark at him when he walks in, tail wagging and a loyal sit of excitement when he looks up at him. alot of training was done with his dog now one on one and he enjoyed every second of that training. but even with your extensive years of training you still never hear him sneak in. he's better than you strategically and he takes pride in that as he gives scout a nice fat bone into his mouth keeping him quiet as he shut the door softly. his keys are silent and his footsteps are as silent than scout's pawpads against the clean floors of the shared home, the jingle of his bell hiding his antics easier. he legit just lets his full weight onto you in your shared bed and you wheeze and shoot a glare. he slips a paper on the sketchbook and it's the completion of his classes. you move the paper and drabbles of how the guys face looked in your journal from the guy who you saw on the run that day and a gruesome sketch of the room in that shed, your eyes are dark as if you've been scribbling there for awhile, thinking about it.
"so you're gone?"
"they've already asked me to be back." he says pushing the journal on the floor. "tomorrow." he murmurs against your skin. "are you going to be okay love?"
"yes sir." you say biting the inside of your lip softly as he kisses up your neck and whispers hot on your skin.
"i'm going to find him for you, stop thinking about him. that's an order. i'm already on it pretty girl."
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nobodysdaydreams · 2 months
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@mahpotatoequeen thank you for tagging me!
How many works do you have on AO3? only 11, but I make up for it in word count.
What’s your total AO3 word count? 468,908 words (sorry)
How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they? Only three fandoms. TMBS (show and books, idk if these count as separate) and wolf 359.
Top five fics by kudos:
So...I'm in some pretty small fandoms and only started writing last year so I don't have a lot of high kudos fics. But this is what I got so far:
S.O.S
The Oldest Siblings
Who You Were Meant To Be / Treat Them With(out) Mercy (tied)
It Should Have Been Us
A Joy To Obey
Honorable mention: The highest Wolf 359 fic I have since I only started writing for that fandom like a week ago (it's a nice fic about Renee and Dominik for anyone interested): For Better or For Worse
Do you respond to comments?
Of course! I love hearing from you guys and discuss my work, fandom theories and ideas.
What’s the fic with the angstiest ending you’ve ever written?
My tmbs followers know the answer to that question. Sorry S.O.S. fans (but also: not sorry at all).
Edit: Also, how did I forget, but my tmbs fic The Boys Who Waited, has a super angsty ending. It's one of my lesser known fics, but I do really like how it comes full circle in the end and you don't realize the implications of what's happening until the fic is over.
As for my Wolf 359 fics, I'd say the one with the angstiest ending is my most recent fic about Jacobi dealing with the loss of Kepler. The fic received positive critical review from the esteemed @sophieswundergarten, but the last chapter does end on a slightly ominous note/cliff hanger. Here it is if you want to check it out: The Legacy of the Artist Formerly Known As Warren Kepler (or An Ode to Whiskey Boy)
Do you write crossovers?
Not really. Some of my fics blend the show and book elements of tmbs, or reference the other, but not to the point of what I'd call a "cross over"
Have you ever gotten hate on a fic?
Not on my fics. I think a few times on my blog, but I don't have time to think about or deal with that. I'm also neurodivergent, so sometimes I have trouble knowing whether people are actually insulting me or doing or saying something "as part of a joke". I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt.
Do you write smut?
Nope, it's not for me.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I hope not, and I don't think so. I write for really small fandoms. It would be pretty obvious if someone did.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No, but @sophieswundergarten recently made a podfic of the first chapter of my fic Who You Were Meant To Be and that made my whole day! 🥰 The link to the podfic is in the chapter notes if you want to listen.
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
I don't do a lot of shipping. I wrote a few things about Renee Minkowski/Dominik Koudelka, but they're married in canon so a lot of that wrote itself. (Works are here if you're interested: For Better or For Worse / The Return of the Blessed)
What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?
All of my SOS sequels. I'm going to try though. We'll see what happens.
What are your writing strengths?
Long fic. I can take an idea and run with it. I'm also good a picking up where I series left things off or when a show gets cancelled and leaves a cliff hanger.
What are your writing weaknesses?
Short fic. I wrote around 7k-8k words for a Wolf 359 fic and someone commented how happy they were that they "finally got a long fic about this". And I was flattered, but like. 7-8k words???? LONG????
...who's gonna tell them?
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?
I've only done this a few times. I try my best and do as much research as I can. I want it to be accurate though, so if you're a native speaker, and I got something wrong, feel free to (politely) lmk so I can fix it.
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written so far?
For the tmbs fandom S.O.S. since it's what I'm known for, but also Who You Were Meant To Be because I love a good redemption story and I've gonna a lot of really nice feedback on it.
For the Wolf359 fandom, weirdly enough, The Return of the Blessed, which is based on my own unhinged crack theory, but I love writing it.
Tagging: @itsgoghtime @oflightningandstars @myfairkatiecat @mysteriouseggsbenedict @heyitsthatonesmolgay and anyone else who wants to participate!
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chaikachi · 1 year
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I appreciate you so much for being loud about rg, despite all the unnecessary hostility this ship gets on a daily basis ❤️, it's my comfort ship and these two dorks literally makes me so happy 💕
Awee of course!!! 🥺💕 This ship means the world to me and I don't know how to be quiet about it these days even if I tried, as evidenced by the fact this answer turned into a whole essay somehow uwu
V8 was when i first really joined the fandom/RG and it was rough. I was scared to admit I shipped it romantically for the longest time because of all the discourse/harassment and I know I am very much not alone in that feeling. For the longest time I was scared to even draw them kissing lest it incite something. But ffs I'm over it. This ship is cute as hell, has so much going for it in canon, and so much creative potential in fanon. I love analyzing their story and somehow still discovering old crumbs even after all this time. Not to mention all the new crumbs this volume has given us!! Feels more like a whole loaf of freshly baked bread than anything else!
Every single argument I've ever seen thrown against the ship in the last 2+ years has been made in bad faith, is a double standard not applied to other ships, or is easily debunkable. Some of the loudest RG antis have a terrible reputation even outside of our 'ship wars', and it actually become so easy to not notice or let it get to you when you block without remorse.
I can't really speak for tumblr as I've gotten not-so-good at interacting with people here recently and feel a bit disconnected from the community (aside from the stray asks/tags y'all send me which I always appreciate 💕). But I know on twitter we've had a handful of new artists and vocal shippers come out of the woodwork in light of the new volume that are flooding the tag with positivity, memes, and creations every day. I've seen multiple rival shippers admit that they have to 'prepare for when rg is canon' and they genuinely believe it. We've even got a few bigger RWBY youtubers standing up for us and shutting down that discourse when people try to stir the pot.
Also numbers aren't really indicative of anything on tumblr when reblogs are more scarce than ever, or on twitter where the algorithm is anyone's guess, but there are some rosegarden posts on this site from 2017 that hit over 4k notes. Some of my own rg pieces on other platforms breach 1-2k. Heck, even some of the metas that I have cross posted to twt have hit more than 600 likes.
There are so many rg shippers out there. And what I am seeing with v9 is a few things. First, any people joining the fandom anew that aren't aware of all the discourse fall into RG pretty easily without that bias being pushed on them.
And second, that when we are loud and we are enthusiastic and we are kind to each other... when we foster healthy and approachable community, that is how we tune out all the negativity, and that is when we have the most fun.
So i'm glad you appreciate all my yelling, and I am not trying to pressure anyone into speaking out or participating if they don't have it in them... but this is a very friendly reminder is always room for more of us out here 💕🌹🌲
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jamesunderwater · 1 month
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20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ
Thanks for tagging me!! @gracelesslady23 @annabtg @kay-elle-cee this was very sweet to get to do.
Ao3 Username: itsjamespotter
1. How many works do you have on A03?
31, wow! How wild, that feels like a lot.
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?
162k!
3. What fandoms do you write for?
HP
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Show and Tell (3k, wolfstar smut)
Dead To Me (91k, wip lily evans angst)
Tall Dark and Glasses (3k, jily fluff)
"you have no idea how long i've been wanting to do that" (1k, prongsfoot smut)
Bring Your Kid to Work Day(s never end when your godfather is Sirius Black) (2k, good godfather sirius black fluff)
5. Do you respond to comments?
I try to, or at least have the goal to, but admittedly I'm very bad at it. (not to use it as an excuse but my adhd is fully to blame.) I plan to go back and catch up on all of them soon & have a dream of being much better about it, though. I do intentionally make sure I eventually respond to the ones for my WIPs, at least.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
well, since dead to me hasn't ended yet (kidding kidding kidding kidding!!!) lmao I really thought I was gonna have a hard time finding a fic with an unhappy ending but I evidently forgot who I am. I dunno how to choose between: 1. i don't even know where you end and i begin (500 words, canon prongsfoot....you get it) 2. Promises to Keep (1k words, dorlene with canon ending....you get it)
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Okay listen, do I technically have a fic that mentions living happily ever after in the last line? Yes. Am I choosing that fic? No. I'm choosing Happy Holidays, You Filthy Potters, because 1. smut, 2. sassy young Harry, and best of all, 3. sassy good godfather sirius black 😉
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I've gotten a couple of comments about Lily in Dead To Me but I've decided it's not my problem if people don't have critical analysis skills 💀
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I do! I write smut for a number of different ships and plan on doing others! Uhhh, what kind? the fact that I don't really know what that means probably means it's pretty vanilla 😆 there's a lot of going down on people 🤐
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Haha, no, but if I did I'd probably do PJO/HP
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge. that would be so heartbreaking.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No, but that's SO cool that people offer to do that for some fics!!!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I have!! @charmsandtealeaves and I co-wrote a fic for a jilychallenge last year, before we were even friends! It was my first time co-writing a fic, which was very cool and different, but also didn't feel that foreign to me -- I think because I've spent a lot more years doing para RP than I have writing fics. It was fun to kind of riff off another writer in a different way. I would definitely do it again!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Okay, this is kind of tough because I only recently got into Prongsfoot, and they are the definition of soulmates... But because I ultimately see Sirius as more of an ace/aro character, Jily wins the place of favorite ship in my heart. <3
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Well, I really only have two WIPs posted on AO3: Dead To Me and Just This Once, and I have all of DTM outlined and plan to finish it by fall. Just This Once might be a while, but I also have a plan for it and would like to finish it at some point... But I guess there's a chance I won't finish it -- I do have a lot of other multi-chaps I am going to be starting soon.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Hm. I like to think I'm good at getting into the minds of my characters, really thinking through their motivations and emotions and then expressing those to the reader. I also think I'm fairly good at dialogue. I really like writing banter so I hope others think I'm good at it, haha. And based on what I've been told, my smut isn't half bad 😆
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Oh, definitely writing descriptions of any kind. I never remember to describe the scene and when I do, I think it feels clunky. I'm not great at writing in a more direct way, either; I struggle to express a character's emotions without getting a bit flowery with it. Just generally, I think my writing could be tighter, you know? I'm sure I'll realize other things I need to work on as I write more long fics, too.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
Ah, haven't done it yet, so don't have any thoughts to share.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
HP -- Jily on the Neopets forums... never 4get <3
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
If we're talking finished works, I'd have to say Tall Dark and Glasses, which I wrote for the masquerade event for Jilytober last year. To me, that fic has a certain je ne sais quois that is hard to replicate. But unfinished? Dead To Me, hands down, and once it's finished it will be very hard to ever top it. It's imperfect and there are a lot of edits I'd make if I were to go back through and polish it up, but it's the first multi chap fic I've ever written, and beyond just feeling immensely proud of that, the story itself and how I'm writing it is one of the most heartfelt and meaningful things I'll ever write in my life.
these were such a pleasure to respond to, thanks again for the tags! <3 I'm tagging: @goldenbi @abihastastybeans & @nodirectionhome-ao3
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acourtofthought · 6 months
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Whenever the fandom goes wild over something, there's an influx of debate from both sides. With the recent IG post we've got some saying it's proof Elain's is next while the other side argues she definitely will not be because she's irrelevant in SF.
I agree the sweater doesn't prove anything but I don't necessarily agree with the the other side either.
In the Live Talks Live with Eva Chen Interview:
28:40: "We were working on ACOWAR but still finishing up ACOMAF".
28:57 "What plans I had for Elain, and for Mor, and Azriel.
29:47 "Because I knew so early on while I was finishing up ACOMAF and working on ACOWAR" "because I knew where I wanted things to go it allowed to plant these for her journey and even Elain's journey early on and to set that journey up."
30:40 "There was a lot of planning involved. I always try to keep one eye on the horizon when I'm writing so in the book I'm working on I can set up for things later on so there's lots of little secrets in Silver Flames that set up for later books."
If SJM has been hinting at Elain's journey since ACOMAF and that didn't guarantee her the next book after the trilogy and some feel she still won't get the next ACOTAR book then why is it assumed that the possible hints that were planted for Azriel's journey in SF or anything that will be mentioned in HOFAS guarantee him the next book? If she could bump an Elain novel even after confirming her journey has been set in motion since book 2 than couldn't she do the same with Az?
While she has said she doesn't always stick to something as she allows the story to lead her, she also said that she keeps one eye on the horizon while writing, that she KNEW where she wanted Nesta and Elain's journey to go. The hints in ACOMAF and ACOWAR are no less important than what she put in SF. Especially when some of those hints led us to Nesta's journey in SF. She then said she planted hints in SF for later books. Even the addition of the crossover could be setting up ones down the line (like some of the 4 she was recently contracted for), not necessarily the very next ACOTAR book. We don't know if what happens in the crossover is going to introduce a future big bad that's a bigger threat than Koschei or if Koschei will remain the worst villain of the ACOTAR world or if there really are only two ACOTAR books remaining. She could have decided to go beyond that which means an Elucien book probably wouldn't end the series. For all we know, she plans on taking one of the four books and writing a multi character POV to wrap up the ACOTAR world as she once did with TOG.
Elain's journey was already being planted three books back so while there are still a few major hints for her in SF, it wasn't necessary to put a ton of focus on her character as we've already had a decent amount of buildup in terms of where her story might lead.
SJM has been somewhat silent on all things Elain related but she also mentioned being excited to finally speak openly of Rhys after keeping his and Feyre's journey in ACOMAF a secret. She spoke of being excited to finally talk about the crossover (another secret she held close). Could she not be doing the same by avoiding discussions about Elain and Lucien? I really dislike the argument that she just doesn't care about Elain enough to give her a POV rather than the more likely scenario being that she wants to keep the readers in the dark on Elain's thoughts. We know Elain is getting a book so do people really believe she's writing a book about a character she doesn't care about? That it's probably a calculated move to not give her a POV?
Ever since Bloomsbury has really gotten involved in what she's allowed to say, she's doesn't talk about her characters and what she has planned for them as she once did.
And over the last few years, her book worlds seem to be continually expanding. While that does mean her initial plans for Elain could have changed, it might also mean her plans for Elain have not changed and she's now just thinking beyond what happens after an Elucien book because at one point, she only knew what the first two books would be about.
SJM even added this in ACOWAR:
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Doesn't that suggest that a Miryam / Drakon book is also still on the table?
I think it's a very real possibility the ACOTAR series isn't stopping with just Gwynriel and Elucien and I think with the crossover there are too many unknowns to say with certainty who is getting the next book. The crossover could merely be pointing us in the direction of that horizon she talked about and what comes down the line, not necessarily what is next.
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