#fuck it let engie play some fire

[chickenburgergmod]

*plays buddy holly*

#tf2 #gmod #team fortress 2 #my art #art #3d #sfm #garrys mod #tf2 engineer #engineer #tf2 engie #cb.art #i actually wanted this to look more calming but #fuck it let engie play some fire

[meiliarotten]

Lingerie Headcanons (All Mercs!)

🔞Minors DNI🔞

The Masterlist

👟 Scout 👟

Honestly I see scout as the kind of guy that gets worked up if you just happen to wear a bra and panties that match.

He just likes the idea that you put thought into what you were gonna wear for him

If you really wanna play to a fantasy though…

Playboy Bunny suits

It’s stereotypical, but people find those outfits sexy for a reason, so can you really blame him?

Favorite colors- he would claim to like the typical red and black, but I honestly think he has a soft spot for pink.

And he definitely doesn’t know shit about lingerie styles (tbh, neither do I. I’m looking at charts and cosmopolitan articles as I write this) so a simple bra and panty set suits him just fine

🦅 Soldier 🦅

Just dress up as the Statue of Liberty, he’ll be all over you

Ok, I’m kidding. Kinda. On to the serious stuff.

I think less is more with Soldier. I’m thinking vintage pinup aesthetic really gets him going

I know it’s not technically lingerie, but hear me out

Wear a dress or top that shows off your chest or “accidentally” drop something only to bend over in a skirt that’s conveniently just a bit too short

Bonus points if your wearing some actual lingerie beneath that skirt, flashing a bit of lace

Tease him, see if you can crack that strict drill sergeant demeanor her tries so hard to maintain

Once you're in private just know he’s not going to hold back on you.

favorite colors are red white and blue. No, I will not be backing down on this.

🔥 Pyro 🔥

the more colorful, the better with this one!

That goes double for frills.

Honestly the two of you could probably make a whole day out of you trying on different outfits and strutting around like a runway model, much to their delight

Pyro is like your own personal cheerleader

May also enjoy sexy costumes (nurses, French maids, etc), but I don’t see them as being much into roleplay, so those are probably more for fun

The fashion show usually ends when an outfit is just too hot for them to resist 😏

Because Pyro fucks and I will die on that hill

Their favorite colors for lingerie would be shades ranging from fire red to pastel pink

Favorite style is either babydolls or rompers. They just think you look so cute in them!

💥 Demoman 💥

He probably has the most ‘traditional’ lingerie tastes of everyone

Nothing too fancy, just a silk chemise or a pair of lacy black panties will do just fine

He definitely loves being surprised with it now and then. Undressing you to find that you’re wearing something special is always a turn on

Sometimes he’ll even save up to buy you a pair for special occasions like anniversaries.

He always gets super flustered when giving it to you, though. It’s really freaking cute

That said, if you really want to get him going, wear a pair of his boxers

You know those guys who think it’s hot as fuck when their partners wear their boxers or briefs?

Yeah, Demo’s one of those guys, 100%

Plus, you get to wear comfy, loose underwear. It’s a win-win!

🥊 Heavy 🥊

Heavy doesn’t have any need for fancy lingerie

Honestly he’s kinda terrified of tearing it. That stuff is expensive!

That said, he does enjoy the way you look in a teddy.

When he learns the name of the garment he’ll call you his “little bear.” It quickly becomes his favorite pet name for you

Favorite colors- doesn’t really have any. He thinks you look pretty in any hue.

That said, one thing that gets him even more worked up than lingerie?

Is when you wear one of his shirts- obviously way to big for you, fitting you like a nightgown- and nothing else.

🔧 Engineer 🔧

this is gonna be stereotypical as hell

And honestly he’s very aware of how stereotypical it is and he’s a little ashamed of it

But if you wore a sexy cowgirl costume he would be on you in a nanosecond

But let’s run with that- I think Engie likes costumes

This man has a secret knack for roleplay, I’m telling you

Naughty nurses, feathery show girls, a college student with a low cut blouse who would do anything for a passing grade

He does have some more vanilla tastes as well though. For example I think he loves the simplicity of a camisole or nightgown

Favorite colors would include white and baby blue

🏥 Medic 🏥

I will PERISH on this hill- Medic is a thigh man.

He LOVES the way stockings hug your legs. (In fact I’ve written a fic about this exact scenario)

He would also go feral over a sexy nurse outfit. Is it stereotypical? Yes. But it is also very hot. (I have also written a fic about this)

He’s definitely bold enough to just outright ask you to wear something for him, perhaps a blood red bustier and some matching garters (to play into that thigh kink I mentioned)

However he leaves it up to you when you will be wearing said thing, maintaining some element of surprise.

Once he actually sees you in it, perhaps waiting for him in his private quarters after a long day of work, he will take his time to admire you, making you do a little spin for him

He’ll definitely tease you and refuse to undress you until you're begging for his touch on your bare skin.

🦘 Sniper 🦘

Sniper is not a picky man when it comes to sex

That said, lingerie is always a welcome surprise

His only preference comes down to the style of the lingerie- he prefers crotchless designs.

He doesn’t see the point of wearing something sexy if he has to take it off to fuck you

Styles where the bottom of the panties can be easily pulled to the side also work for this

I think he also enjoys silkier textures.

He’ll run his hands over the fabric both during and after sex, almost as a way to soothe himself and come down from the high

Neither of you really know why this calms him down so much

🌹 Spy 🌹

Spy has sugar daddy energy and will probably buy lingerie for you

Expect the fanciest, silkiest garments that money can buy.

Chemise, robes, and negligee (which is basically the “wealthy widow whose husband died under mysterious circumstances” robe, according to the internet)

Most often they would be in traditional black, but I feel like a deep violet or midnight blue could also be appealing to him.

Oh and get ready to be teased to hell and back.

Spy likes to take his time, especially when you’re wearing something nice for him. After all, what’s the point if he just strips it off of you immediately? (plus this stuff is expensive so he’s gotta get his money’s worth out of this.)

He loves teasing you

#tf2 x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #merc x reader #minors dni #smut #tf2 smut #team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 headcanons #headcanon #headcanons #team fortress #team fortress two

[earthearthearththearth]

💞TF2 First Date Headcanons💞

This is my first time writing them! God this took so fucking long anyway

⚾Scout- To be honest, if he’s not that much into you (and even if he is), he probably wants to fuck on the first date. Or at least he thinks he wants to, but doesn’t make that much of a move. I think that the first date consists of intense planning that more than likely doesn’t work out. Maybe you guys just grab food or go to a game or something. He’s a baseball guy. He definitely seems like one too. A lot of the date is him talking to you, maybe you get a word in. Give the guy a break, he’s excited. His ideal date I think would be something active, or a place where you guys can talk and be loud. Think concerts. Although I don’t think he would go to those often. For some reason I can see him liking the zoo. At the end of the date, he might ask you to hang around. Just to have your company and have something like a little sleepover. 

🗡Spy- Oh it is fancy. It is fancy and it is elaborate. You are stunning, gorgeous, dashing, beautiful, a sight to behold, all of the above. He says this to you. He’s all about first impressions, and second ones. And third and fourths. Eventually you get through and he’s a little more normal, if that’s what you wanna say. But that’s a different post. I don’t know whether he would take you somewhere or think of something himself, but I think he would take you somewhere real fancy. The base is too hectic for a real date in his eyes. You probably don’t care. The date is small talk and classic. He pays, you feel a little bad. I imagine this isn’t something you’re used to. You’re definitely  going home with this guy, though. 

🦘Sniper-I imagine this guy is the type of person to teach his s/o, maybe everyone, to shoot a gun. So that’s what you do. It’s you two alone in the desert, shooting cans, shooting other shit, maybe you light a fire at some point when it gets dark. I like to think that despite him being very outdoorsy and Like That, he doesn’t mind staying in for his s/o. So maybe you guys cook something up in the camper. I don’t think you stick around in the camper in the middle of nowhere with a guy you just had a first date with. Or maybe you do! Cause like, how do you expect to get home?

🛠Engineer-You know that scene in the Barbie movie where Ken sings at Barbie and plays his guitar at the fire? You do now. That’s the date, but a lot less awkward. You and Engie’s date is a big ol’ bondfire and some guitar strumming. If you’re interested, he’ll show you the stuff he made. If you guys decide to cook over this fire, don’t be surprised if it gets interrupted with a few of the other guys. Or just Pyro. Definitely Pyro. He doesn’t mind too much, and hopefully neither do you. The date is sweet, and if you know how to play a guitar, then he’ll definitely let you take a crack at it. Good or bad, he’s kind of smitten. Most of the night consists of just sharing stories and enjoying each other’s presence, at some points you forget it’s a date. It just feels like a night out with a friend.

💣Demoman-Look me in the eyes and tell me what YOU think. Kidding. Kind of. Drinking will be involved at some point, but if you’re not up for a bar and getting shitfaced then WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING READING DEMOMAN’S SECTION? Kidding. His ideal first date is very mellow, surprisingly. Cooking together, showing you around. It’s been a white since I’ve been in the fandom, but he strikes me as kind of a book worm. Maybe it’s the hat. That motherfucker definitely read Moby Dick once or twice. Anyway, I think he likes to dance with his s/o! Very much just some slowdancing in the middle of a living room or kitchen or something. Maybe not the kitchen because people go in there. But if you don’t care then neither does he. To reference some book I read, he’s more than the [growing] alcoholic you took him for…he’s also a friend. I haven’t read the comics either in a while, but he’s a funny guy I know that. 

🔥Pyro-Yeah so there’s fire involved. What do I even tell you man. There’s fire and they tell you a lot of things, none of which you really understand, but it results in you guys drawing together too. Their drawings are pretty graphic, so you say fuck it. Now you both are sharing the red crayon. After this, you throw them into a large fire that you two lit. It used to be a tree. You have to admit it’s pretty beautiful. Especially when the sky turns dark, and not just from smoke. Maybe this guy does know what he’s doing. If it’s not a tree that’s caught on fire, then you too mosey on over to Engineer’s previously mentioned fire. Don’t think about it too hard. 

💉Medic-If it’s not canon, I imagine him as kind of a hermit. Maybe a major one. He’s definitely the type of guy to be working in the lab late one night. So, if you two are going to be a thing, you have to get used to said lab. Hopefully you’re not squeamish. The date is dissection. Whatever he is working on, you are too, but most things you’re not allowed to touch just yet, so you stick by the birds. He doesn’t mind for a while, but it is a date. Once this hits him, he lets you disembowel the corpse. Aw. Isn’t that sweet? You didn’t learn a thing, but the conversation and act itself was kind of fun!

🐻Heavy-A first date for him means getting to know each other. Very classic. I imagine, however, that his idea of getting to know each other means meeting the family. We all know he’s a family man, so you’re gonna meet them all. Haha funny reference. Anyway, you might fight a bear. Stories are shared, it’s a lot like Engineer’s date in that regard. You two have fun though. If you’re not up to meeting an entire family, though, that’s reasonable. He likes books. You probably do too. So you guys can read. Nothing like sharing other people’s stories

🦅Soldier- Oh you thought this was going to be nice. This was going to be nice and normal like the rest of them. Listen pal. Buddy. Chum. This is a first date. Nudity is involved, maybe not your own nudity, but someone’s definitely naked. I want to say you’re naked and covered in honey, but someone else did that two years ago. So like, maybe fight a bear man, snap a few necks. Make this man proud with the sweet sound of freedom (freedom to snap necks). 

👓Miss Pauling-Goodluck. She gets one day off a year, and she is not spending it on another first date. If you’re going on a date with her, you’re probably already together. It’s not your fault! Her schedule is shit. A date with her is most likely going to be staying in, ordering takeout, and watching some shows. She probably loves you if she’s spending her day off with you, but she’s not exactly the most energetic considering her job. 

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 medic #marble hornets #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #tf2 heavy #tf2 miss pauling #tf2 pyro #tf2 soldier #tf2 engineer #tf2 demoman #tf2 x reader #tf2 headcanons #x reader #headcanons

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

More TF2 Headcanons because you guys loved the last one.

You guys better buckle up because I'm already thinking of a pt 3

Tw - Bigotry, alcoholism

Not specifically set in 2023, kinda a mix of being in the 60s and 2023. You'll get what I mean in certain headcanons.

————————————————————

All of them are animal people on some level.

Demo, Engie, and Heavy all love cats. I personally think Demo has a cat on base that he manages to hide from the others. He found it outside one night, it also had a fucked up eye. They love each other.

Sniper loves rabbits, I wonder why. He also loves Australian wildlife. He's a big fan of crocodiles but won't admit it because he hates the idea of being a stereotype.

Scout and Soilder love dogs.

Spy claims he doesn't like animals. He will call then "Filthy beasts." He's lying. He's a liar. He loves birds. sometimes, he just disappears for an hour or two, and the other mercs are super confused. He's hiding in Medic's room with his birds. He also likes Maine Coons.

Medic obviously loves birds. His doves are his pride and joy, but I think he actually likes all animals. He finds comfort in reptiles because he also sometimes feels like he lacks the ability to feel emotion. Archimedes is his favorite. Don't let him tell you he "doesn't play favorites." With his birds. He does.

Pyro has one of those bubble eyed goldfish. They named it firefly, and none of the other mercs know where they got it from. They love fish! They'd have a koi pond if they had room.

————————————————————

Demoman time because he's an underrated king! (TW: ALCOHOLISM)

I don't actually think Demo is plastered all the time. Sure, some nights, he'll get blackout drunk and seriously have no recollection of what he did the night before. I think most days, he's a functional alcoholic who's over exaggerating how drunk he is. He wants attention but doesn't know why or how to ask for it.

This. Man. Has. Emotional. Issues.

On a positive note! I agree with the headcannons saying he dyes his hair to look like a fire. He's also a really good cook when he's willing to step into the kitchen.

————————————————————

Engie has dentures, not because of age or anything. I just think he genuinely never had a family that was present or super caring. Honestly, I also think he's super protective of his teammates because they're family to him) No one ever really told him about how important taking care of his teeth was. Medic nearly fainted when he saw Engie's teeth. Also! He definitely made his own dentures.

————————————————————

(TW AGAIN FOR BIGOTRY (RACISM AND ANTISEMITISM SPECIFICALLY)

Demo and Medic have a shared bond in the fact that they've faced discrimination.

Demo pretends like he doesn't notice the discrimination, but that shit hurts him. Being in America during the tail end of segregation really fucked him up.

I've seen people headcannon Medic as Jewish, and I honestly agree, but it also adds another layer to the discrimination he faces.

I don't know if this is cannon or not, but I heard people saying he left Germany because of WW2. I definitely think this man has gone through the trauma of fleeing his home country to seek asylum in a less dangerous country. He has nightmares about this.

There's no way he didn't live in constant fear over being Jewish. I also definitely think for a while that he hated his German heritage because of what was happening in the world. Like this man full on wouldn't speak because he could only speak German or with a prominent accent, and he was so ashamed. After the war, though, he stopped having this internalized hatred.

Also, if you headcannon him as a Nazi. Go fuck yourself.

————————————————————

Spy time!

I genuinely think this man wants to be a good father to Scout, but he has no reference. I definitely think that Spy's dad walked out on him or didn't love him as a child. Also, with his job being what it is, he definitely gets scared when he feels an actual connection with someone.

He is way to fucking scared to tell Scout that he's his dad. He pretends that not telling Scout is just easier for everyone, but he's really scared that Scout will never look at him or talk to him again. He truly values Scouts opinions even if he doesn't make that know.

————————————————————

Oh, did someone ask for Medic headcannons again?? No? Well, he's my favorite girl, so....

He has gotten glitter in at least one mercs chest cavity. He literally glitterglued Heavy's ribs back together when he kept asking when his ribs would grow back.

This man is a menace at pride parades. He is the most flamboyant gay you've ever met. Let's be honest he's dressed up as FrankNFurter more than once.

He would bedazzled his gloves and boots for the Barbie movie.

————————————————————

That's all I have for now. Pt. 3 will come eventually bc I'm fully into the fandom now 😭

#tf2 spy #tf2 demoman #tf2 scout #tf2 headcanons #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 #team fortress headcanons #team fortress 2 #tf2 soldier #tf2 engineer #tf2 pyro #tf2 heavy #tw racsim #tw antisemitism #tw alchoholism

[anonymous-astronaut]

The mercs on a nudist beach?

LMAO oh this one is hilarious I’ll see what I can do.

Scout

Bruh he is beyond embarrassed at seeing people naked. Probably thought there were gonna be a bunch of hot chicks, and he’s mortified by all the regular ass middle-aged folks just hanging out (both figuratively and literally). Can’t carry a normal conversation if any dudes in the nude try to talk to him. Does his best to see as little of his teammates as humanly possible, and stands near the water so he can look at that view instead. Pretends he’s suddenly really interested in shells or something. Keeps his swim trunks securely on his body the whole time.

Soldier

Clothes gone. Simply vanished. In fact he probably destroyed them in his dedication to being naked. He feels free as fuck and has a grand old time, actually letting himself relax and have some fun. Builds a sandcastle of the White House and eats a sandwich (which he thinks is required because it has the word sand in it) before trying to catch fish with his bare hands (and bare everything else). He thinks everyone should be participating, and will lecture anyone who IS wearing clothes about how important “freedom” is in every sense of the word.

Pyro

To them it’s just like any other beach day. They personally keep covered head to toe, but they don’t care at all about other people being naked, they barely even seem to notice. They have fun playing usual beach games and splashing around in the water, and will be absolutely ecstatic if they are allowed to build a bonfire or access a fire pit.

Demo

He has no problem taking it all off, but secretly he is a little self conscious about his own body. As long as he’s not the only one in the nude, he quickly forgets any reservations and just focuses on having a good time. Probably helps Soldier with whatever crazy thing he’s doing. Doesn’t give a single fuck about other people being naked, but he will reassure anyone who seems nervous. Wants everyone to be comfortable, and will try to keep Soldier from yelling at anyone who does want to keep their clothes on

Heavy

Would have no shame whatsoever in being naked, he just has no interest in doing so in public. He’s too reserved. Doesn’t really understand why anyone feels the need to do so, but doesn’t care enough to ask .Perfectly content to sit on the beach with a good book or a nice conversation with Medic and let the others frolic around.

Engie

He’s way too shy to do more then unbutton his shirt a little extra. His southern modesty honestly makes him feel a little embarrassed around those who are naked. He’s real awkward about it, but eventually lets himself lie back with a beer and relax. He finds the best method is to try not to think about it and avert his eyes so no unfortunate images get seared permanently into his brain.

Medic

He’s a doctor for gods sake, he’s seen more naked bodies than he can count. You literally couldn’t pay him to care. He sees no particular reason to be naked himself, maybe if he planned on going in the water he’d give it a try, but really it just makes no difference to him. He mostly stays on the beach with Heavy, enjoying the fresh air and ocean scenery. Definitely the one mischievously feeding the seagulls

Sniper

The only thing he doesn’t take off is his hat. This is not an area in which Sniper has any shame or lack of confidence, he has no problem going au-natural. Seeing the others doesn’t bother him the slightest bit either. He just takes the opportunity to get a nap in the sun like a damn lizard with only his face covered by his slouch hat.

Spy

Won’t so much as take his jacket off. Maybe, maybe, with a lot of convincing, he’ll loosen his tie. He hates the beach, hates sand, hates seawater. There is nothing interesting enough for him to do, so he just kinda sits there grumpily. Naked people don’t bother him exactly, but he would certainly rather not see his coworkers without clothing. That said, he’s more upset about the sand in his shoes to be honest.

#tf2 #tf2 sniper #tf2 medic #tf2 spy #tf2 heavy #tf2 scout #tf2 pyro #tf2 engie #tf2 soldier #tf2 demoman #tf2 headcanons

[dthmet]

It came to me in a dream. /j

I’m only posting this because I need somewhere to put my shenanigans. (And also so my next post makes more sense but shhhhhh secret)

Basically, me and my friends all started playing this Burger game on roblox together in Tf2 cos and it was fun as FUCK

I jokingly said “what if I made a Burger King AU were they all work at burger king” I was gnna write a fanfic (think I still might) about them all instead of being mercenaries, they are burger king employees, and the thought hasn’t left me SINCE.

So, here are some little ideas I thought would be funny to put down somewhere other than my notes app:

Scout chasing Spy around the kitchen areas with a tray, trying to hit him with it. (Actually happened in game, it was funny as fuck)

Medic being weirdly protective over his “area” of the staff room, were he sits and experiments on the food. (Wait, where did he find all of those medical instruments??? And is that… a mutated burger???)

Spy wearing suits or turtlenecks under his uniform, he says it’s because at least SOMEONE has to look presentable in the establishment. (Engie then reminds him he’s working at a Burger King, not a 5 star restaurant. Spy then spends the rest of the work day moping around and mumbling about how “he could’ve done better than this”)

Engineer surprisingly being a clean freak and gets heavily offended when Sniper forgets to wash his hands in the employee bathroom. (After that Engie refused to let Sniper be anywhere near the customers or kitchen until Engie made sure Sniper’s hands were 100% clean.)

Pyro has almost burnt down the whole building MULTIPLE times. Any kind of food you get from them is always somewhat burnt, or has some unwanted candy that pyro got from god knows where lodged into it.

Heavy has scared off so many rude customers, whenever somebody has an issue with an entitled customer who’s just there to complain and scream for their manager, they always call Heavy in to stare them down and calmly (yet intimidatingly) explain that they need to leave— or whatever applies to the situation.

Demo has shown up drunk to work so many times, it’s a miracle he hasn’t been fired yet. But also occasionally if a rude customer tries bothering him, he’ll cuss them out with very slurred Scottish slang/insults— only reason he hasn’t been fired for that yet is because no one can even understand what he said. (“Awa’ an’ bile yer heid! Ye bawbag!”)

Solider is a hit with the middle aged men, he often yells about america and waves the American flag around the building, once Solider had gotten ahold of the speakers in the Burger King and started blasting the American anthem on LOOP. (He was not allowed to uses the speakers again after that.

Sniper is absolutely horrible with the customers, he’s always either saying too much or too little (and usually when he is saying too much it’s because he started panicking, and then told some customer all about how Australia is like, definitely over sharing about his own personal life in Australia). He ends up accidentally putting the customers off of their food by sharing some gross detail about the bugs or animals there, he then sits outside at the back and cringes over how stupid that was of him.

I May return soon with more Burger King AU info… shhhhh

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #burger king #Burger King AU #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 soldier #tf2 pyro #tf2 heavy #tf2 demoman #this is so stupid #tf2 au

[voidendron]

This week's team shenanigans were

Amusing to watch, to say the least skjddjdj

To start, Snorks did HM Dread Fortress (we decided to reclear all the HMs on that team so my new co-tank can get the practice in) on Tuesday

It honestly went pretty well. I've been letting Troy main tank so he can get the practice in and I just point him in the right direction, and he's really been improving over the time he's joined us

Anyway, we did have some wipes on Neffy cause im gonna be honest, I totally forgot the HM mechs for her and wasn't directing Troy very well. HM seems harder than NiM???? Cause that damn droid is nonstop and we split up for too long once cause of it

Draxus was. Well, Draxus. That fight drags on no matter what mode it is. Grob'thock resulted in an oopsie when someone decided to reflect their fire and promptly forgot to step out of it before their reflect wore off and they immediately died while Gham laughed - cause she'd literally said just seconds before to step out after three stacks if reflecting

Also surprise! I'd decided to try sin tank for the first time in that op, and got informed that I'd be cheesing arcing assault so I could hold her the whole time

Uh. Needless to say the healers hated me the first few times I was figuring it out ksjajshssj. I may or may not have gotten 9 stacks at one point- >.>

I ALSO might have forgotten very briefly how to tank six-finger phase, and that "briefly" was just long enough for an orb to murder someone and wipe us. So YEAH OOPS. But once we got all the kinks worked out we cleared her which meant the team could move to DP :D

Dusty also got pinned by a wall by the reaches and promptly died to them. ...twice. we teased him about it the rest of the night jsjsshsbd

Nothing too exciting happened in DP on Wed, though I did learn sin HURTS on Tyrans. I'll bring a vanguard for him from now on, tyvm >:(

I also accidentally learned how to cheese Bestia stacks sksjdjdb. I'd shrouded so it wouldn't hurt as much before Troy could swap with me, then got really confused why I didn't get stacks

(someone: "Oh did u shroud it?" Me: "THAT WORKS???")

So I just ended up cheesing all of them while Troy dealt with adds (I'd accidentally left two-cloaks on after Brontes the day before, so was able to get every one). That made it soooo much easier why didn't I sin tank before 7.x what the heck

For TLM, we lost a tank so the leads asked if I'd be willing to tank for it. We're currently in NiM DP

My co-tank wanted me to learn how to tank doubles. Ow. Just.

Ow.

If I'm not spot-on with my cooldowns I'm dead the damage they put out is insane

Iirc first pull ended in me immediately getting deleted because I wasn't expecting THAT much damage whoops sjdjxhdb

But we got it in the end even with two DPS fills and a tank who'd never tanked it in NiM!

Also. Tyrans is. SO much easier as a tank than DPS???? We get like double the time to get simplification to the right tile it's insane

we did make it to Calphy, too!

...dusty murdered the tanks when he got the red circle in the group right after Inevitability cause he was juuuuust far enough away from boss that the healer baiting didn't get it and he got it instead ajskdl;sdjl;j

But now.

The Real Funny Raid

Sheeeesh is doing NiM SnV

City boss was. Yeah.

Let's just say we had to force ourselves to learn Smart Paths so we WOULDNT pull the droids. First few times we did we regretted it, so we learned quick jsjdfbhfhf

At ops chief, Shiba (on engi) managed to pull aggro for a split second. He was IMMEDIATELY deleted by Terminate at like full health. Jesus fuck it must hurt in NiM

First pull on Olok we left a droid in the room and took the elevator

....it killed three people through the floor, including a healer. Yeah, we didn't leave anything alive in the room before going downstairs the next pull

Gham also laughed at me. I was playing sniper and a shady customer knocked me back right after my entrench wore off, interrupting my cull. My disgruntled "well that was RUDE >:( " paired with the view she got of me getting knocked was apparently really funny

Warlords resulted in both the best and worst clear i think I've ever seen

Everyone but Dusty and our fill healer were standing with Sunder, the last boss up, suuuuper close to dead. Dusty did what he could to damage him, but since he'd oops bubbled the previous The End, the next one killed him

So that left our operative healer

In a last ditch effort to survive so he could try to keep attacking, he popped evasion/blow for blow

Sunder smacks him and kills him

...BUT ALSO DIED HIMSELF

Sunder literally reflected himself to death on a healer 🤣

vc was HOWLING with laughter when the achievments popped as the healer died

(And of course it was one of the few times I didn't stream so I couldn't clip it 😭)

We got a pull in on Styrak, too

Spectator, jokingly: "pull all the groups"

Eric, tanking: "o ok" *proceeds to do just that as the rest of the group panics*

Spectator: "wait no why"

(We DID manage to kill all of them without any deaths but please. Never again jsjshssvdv most people had 0 DCDs after that)

But now... the Styrak prog begins

#swtor #oliver vs ops #operation: dread fortress #operation: dread pallace #operation: scum and villainy

[tf2redshot]

Your writing is so chaotic I LOVE IT. All the mercs having a sleep over at their base?

Sleep over At The Base

Technically, since they all live together, everyday is a sleep over!

Nobody actually wanted to do the 'sleep over' to begin with, not even Pyro, but A BLU Spy is in the base so that gave them the reason to sleep together in the intelligence room.

They all brought sleeping bags, some just brought a blanket and a pillow (Scout)

It was somewhere around 6 PM when the intruder alert rang off, so it was pretty early when they all got to the intelligence room.

It wasn't that awkward, because Scout dropped to the floor laughing at everyone's sleepwear.

Scout was the most normal out of all of them, surprisingly. He wore a simple plain red tee and shorts to sleep.

Everyone else? Costume party

But in all honesty, it makes Scout look like the weird one.

Soldier was snug in his trunks and socks and nothing else

Pyro was in a plain red pyjama jumpsuit, but it was worn over their uniform so they looked puffed

Heavy had the whole nightgown, brought an extra sleeping bag for Sasha.

Demoman and Sniper sleep naked, but they couldn't do that around their team mates, so they had to force themselves into whatever thing they had besides their uniform

Spy was back in his suit, and everyone teased him and told him to go shower for once

Truth be told, Spy was already in his pyjamas before all this happened, but he didn't want the team seeing him in his very unstylish checkered black and red pyjamas so he switched back to his suit

Medic wore a sleeveless undershirt and his trunks, but for formality's sake he wore his lab coat over

Engineer wore the same as Medic, but to everyone's surprise he was a lot less embarrassed with what he was sporting.

"What? I can't get comfy in mah own bed?"

Everyone turned to Scout, who decided to just, maybe shut the fuck up for his entire life?

So everyone split apart to do their own thing.

Engineer was busy setting up his nest in the room's entrance. Personally told everyone to fuck off in the most polite yet menacing manner. He wants his beauty sleep, let 'im have it. Kill the darn spy, pew pew.

Everyone else was indulging in a friendly drinking game, which grew non-friendly in under an hour after playing

Scout slammed his body on the white folding table that was conveniently placed there for some reason, the absolute teenager

Pyro and Soldier snagged the table legs and engaged in aggressive sword fighting

Demo and Heavy arm wrestled atop the broken table, and since it's now broken, they had to bend down in the most unpleasant position to continue the game, both their asses high in the air with their upper halves on the floor, still deep in the arm wrestling match.

The entire support class however, decided to keep it calm and casual for tonight and just talk around Engineer, keeping him company.

The Mature Squad

So after all that bazinga, they all headed to bed. Everyone avoided each other's sleeping spaces like the plague - at least 99999 km away from each other.

So everyone was fast asleep, and

Not really, Engie's fucking sentry bzzzzzzbzbzbzzbzbbzbzbzbzbzbzbzbbzbzbzing kept everyone awake. EXCEPT for Engie. He slept with the sentry's buzzing and whirring like it was the sweetest lullaby

Everyone had their eyes wide open and bloodshot. They all sat up and rubbed their temples.

Finally having enough of the noise after a good twenty minutes, they all gathered in the middle of the room - trying their darnest to not wake Engie because who knows what the Texan can do when woken up

"Can someone stop the darn machine?"

"Heavy cannot sleep."

"LET'S WAKE THE ENGINEER!"

"Soldier shut the fuck up!"

Spy steps forward, "I'll handle this." He fishes out his sapper from god knows where and waves it around. Too sleep deprived to think of a better idea.

Everyone huddled together at the far corner of the room while Spy snuck his way towards Engie's sentry nest.

Spy quietly stands over Engie's sleeping body and his sentry. He slowly lowers his sapper.

BEEP! BEEP!

"Wha-? Huh-?! DARN IT! Spah sappin' mah sentry!"

Engie bolts up awake, grabbing his Panic Attack and shooting the first thing he saw.

And Spy found himself back in resupply.

Everyone just went - run

Engie was in a fix-it-felix frenzy with his dear contraptions, his dear babies.

The sentry malfunctions and suddenly turns to the team, besides Engineer. It blasts rockets and rapid fire bullets.

And everyone found themselves sitting idly in resupply with Spy, who'd fallen asleep at some point, leaning on the resupply cabinet.

Yes, of course. Now was the perfect time to get the sleep they deserved. The beer was taking its effect more and more with every second they stayed awake

They all dropped dead on the floor, not caring that they don't have pillows and cushions or that they were sleeping on a probably piss and mud covered floor.

Back to Engie, he finished fixing up his contraptions, not noticing how everyone just sort of vanished.

He went back to sleep, pulling his blanket over his body as sleep washed over him.

And the BLU Spy - who was cloaked next to the intelligence this entire time - has never seen something so horrific and stupid happen in under a minute. It was a world record

You guys could probably see the sleep deprivation sinking in somewhere around the middle of the story

Anyways thanks for the request! This was absolutely FUN to write - I’ve had ideas for something like this for a while! I love team bonding moments! 

They all showered nice and clean the next day, don't worry lads.

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 headcanons #team fortress 2 headcanons #team fortress 2 hcs #hcs #tf2 scout #tf2 spy #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 solly #tf2 pyro #tf2 heavy #tf2 demo #tf2 demoman #tf2 engineer #tf2 engie #tf2redshot

[tf2-headcanons-and-scenarios]

Hewwo! Can I request some headcanons on how each mercenary would raise their daughter from childhood to adulthood? Thanksies!! Also, I adore your writing 😘💞

A/N: A nice short and sweet thing I hope you lot enjoy! My desire to have children when I’m older and married is strong so it fueled this for me :)

Scout:

- Honestly this man has no clue how to raise a daughter

- He knows how to raise boys, but knows nothing about raising girls, so you help him out more times than he wants to admit

- He definitely wants to make sure his daughter stays healthy and active, so growing up he introduces her to various sports

- Baseball, Softball and American Football are among the 3 most played sports between Scout and his daughter

- Early morning runs became a tradition between Scout and his girl growing up. Unless one was injured or sick, they would ALWAYS run in the morning

- Scout looks to you for giving your daughter life advice because try as he might he just can’t seem to give the right advice to her

- Overprotective? Nah, so long as his daughter doesn’t do something incredibly stupid or brings home a very dangerous partner

- When Scout’s daughter reaches adulthood, they continue with their morning jogs and start to play aggressively against each other in sport

Soldier:

- This man goes from hardcore drill seargent to hardcore softie in a matter of SECONDS after meeting his daughter for the first time

- This man is about discipline and self-routine. He’d try to make sure his daughter can look after herself properly in case anything was to happen

- He would definitely give in to the tea parties, he so would

- When she’s old enough, he’d teach her how to shoot a gun for self defence

- He leaves the stuff about school and girl-based advice to you

- He is literally the dad holding a shotgun when his daughter brings home a romantic partner, and he will intimidate them and their loyalty to his daughter

- Soldier will reward good behaviour and actions, often taking his daughter out to see a movie or get some ice cream

- When Soldier’s little girl becomes a woman, he’ll teach her how to use explosives and basically drop in with a packet of bread and stories to tell

Pyro:

- Pyro is just excited about having a daughter, that’s another person to host tea parties with!

- Dear god where they afraid of hurting her, especially since they worked with dangerous amounts of fire 24/7

- Cute clothes for the baby girl? FUCK YES!!!

- Stuffed toys? YOU BET!!!

- You enjoy watching Pyro play with your little girl, and you loved to join in

- All three of you celebrate the holidays like there is no tomorrow, and you absolutely love it

- Pyro surprisingly teaches your daughter how to be safe around fire. The last they want is to see their little girl covered in burn marks

- They are generally good with giving advice, but stuff like puberty is a zone Pyro does not go to, often leaving those questions with you

- When your daughter grows up, Pyro loves dropping in for tea, and definitely loves bringing up baby photos of your little girl

Demoman:

- Demoman is over the moon when he first met his daughter. He forever counts himself lucky he had the eyesight to see her

- Babyproofed the house and never laid a finger on explosives when she was around

- You never thought you’d see the day Demo would stop drinking, but ever since your daughter was born he didn’t touch a single drop

- He never consistently bagged your child about becoming a demolitions expert, but he always had fun making small and safe explosions in the yard every now and then

- He is the parent who sneaks their child a sip of Whiskey on the rocks. You were certainly not impressed when you caught him

- He did return to drinking as his daughter grew older, but he never drinks to the amounts he drank before she was born

- He is really good with life advice (thanks to his own mother), and is the dad that tries to guide his child along the straight and narrow path

- When she grows up he takes her down to the bar to drink responsibly, and he loves telling her stories of his days working as a mercenary

- You bet he tests the romantic partner with hardcore shots of Rum containing 90% Alcohol

- FYI such alcohol exists

Heavy:

- Heavy helped his mother raise his sisters for years, so having to look after a baby girl was easy for him

- Soft lullabies and fairytale stories at night were Heavy’s favourite moments of the day when your daughter was young

- Great with advice and puberty questions, though he sometimes turned to you to ask if he was answering them properly or not

- Definitely teaches his daughter fluent Russian and boxing

- As she gets older he starts talking more about his past as a mercenary and former life in a Russian gulag

- He definitely teaches his daughter the history of Russia and how bad things can be if a bad person was left in power

- When she grows up he is the loving father who loves talking as often as he can with his daughter. No matter how old she is, he would always call her by her childhood nicknames

Engineer:

- Engi wrote down lullabies on his guitar for her even before she was born

- Baby furniture was all assembled by hand by this Texan man

- He loves giving the infant girl cuddles and tries to get her to speak as early as humanly possible

- As she gets older he allows her into the workshop so long as she promises not to touch or break anything important or dangerous

- The amount of times this daughter of his has broken that rule is enough times to give him chronic back pains at the ripe old age of not-even-50-yet and you so very close to banning her from entering his workshop

- He is great with advice and even greater with schoolwork. He loves having discussions with her about subjects she doesn’t know too well. He will leave you with some personal questions if he can’t find the words for it

- He will encourage her to pursue her passions no matter what they were, even if society deemed it inappropriate. If she wanted to be a nurse or a lawyer or even the fucking Queen of England she can damn well strive to be just that!

- He invents various toys and items for her whenever an idea strikes him fancy, and he will teach her how to handle a wrench and a sink at least

- When she grows up he will continue making things for her and send them her way at random times. He will also be the aged father who loves playing the guitar for her

Medic:

- Local medical man knows you were pregnant with a girl before you were 3 months pregnant

- Said medical man was over the moon he had a daughter to look forward to (you found it surprising that he wanted to dress her up in a lot of cute outfits)

- Medic would always take charge with making sure you and your unborn daughter were healthy and happy throughout the pregnancy

- He would also be the one to deliver the baby! The amount of happy tears he shed holding her for the first time was the most happy you had seen him in a long time

- Having a baby kept Medic in his toes. No child of his, daughter or son, was going to go through the night with a cold!

- He is the one who always patches up his daughter’s scratches with bandaids and song-like words that cheer her up

- God forbid him even let her into the Medbay in the middle of an experiment

- Medic would let his child feed the birds, and Archimedes loves hanging around your daughter

- Medic would go to you for help when he needed advice on how to take care of his little girl properly, but otherwise the both of you were just fine

- When your daughter grew up the first thing she did was go to Medical school inspired by her father’s career, and he would help support her as much as he could

- She would also take care of her own brood of doves

- She promised to keep away from experimenting for your sake

Spy:

- THIS MAN WAS A NERVOUS WRECK WHEN HE FOUND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT

- He already failed to raise one child, so why did fate give him another?!

- He promised himself he wouldn’t run like he did with his first child, and stuck with you throughout the pregnancy

- He would not let you mention how much he cried holding your daughter for the first time to anyone else

- He was a very cautious man once your daughter arrived. He even stopped smoking inside buildings to avoid ruining her lungs

- Taught her how to speak French as early as she could understand it. This may have lead her to develop his accent over time but you love it

- Advice was something Spy trusted you to do more than himself. He would never shake the fear he was going to fail at his second attempt at being a father

- You always found your heart melting whenever you caught your daughter and Spy resting with one another after reading a bedtime story

- Even after growing up, Spy always looked out for his daughter, and wouldn’t hesitate to protect her from any of his enemies that try to harm her or you

- He is forever grateful he was given a second chance at fatherhood, and did his best to not let it go to waste

A/N: So I’m back! Hope ya didn’t miss me too much. Thanks for being patient with me!! 💕💕

#tf2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 x reader #tf2 scout x reader #tf2 soldier x reader #tf2 pyro x reader #tf2 demoman x reader #tf2 heavy x reader #tf2 engineer x reader #tf2 medic x reader #tf2 sniper x reader #tf2 spy x reader #scout x reader #soldier x reader #pyro x reader #demoman x reader #heavy x reader #engineer x reader #medic x reader #sniper x reader #spy x reader #teamfortress2headcanons #tf2 reader insert #team fortress 2

[fuckyeahscienceparty]

Fighter (Lover)

Call me fighter, I'll mop the floor with you

Call me lover, I'll take you for a drink or two

You'll get older, and maybe then you'll feel some control...

-

HOO longest thing i've ever written lads :V hope y'all enjoy! title/description based on fighter by jack stauber bc i thought it was very fitting lol

-

Engie let out a strangled yell as he finally managed to land a solid hit on RED's Spy with his wrench, the familiar sound of crunching bone and the squelches of blood that accompanied it filling the air and splattering his overalls in French flavored crimson.

Not a very pretty way to die, and he almost felt bad for the fella, knowing from.... rather painful experience how excruciating it was to go through respawn after having your skull caved in. But almost was the keyword here, especially considering the fact that the bastard had unfortunately managed to sap both his dispenser and his sentry in the process, leaving him not only vulnerable to his fellow REDs but without the resources to actually get things up and running again.

What was extra unfortunate was that before he could get to either of them, they'd both managed to practically destroy both affected buildings, causing his dispenser to spark and sputter to a halt and his sentry to explode, sending components and pieces of shrapnel flying everywhere and barely giving Engie a chance to shield himself while hanging on to less than half of his health points.

Great. Just great.

He let out an annoyed grumble, anger rising in himself as he began to at least attempt damage control by basically tearing the sapper off of his dispenser with his bare hand. He didn't even care about all the little metal bits in his skin that tore through his shirt and were starting to make blood ooze out, staining his already sullied uniform. What he cared about was making sure that RED didn't take their final point and not having sentry up, even if it was just a level 1, was going to make that exceedingly difficult.

That being said, if he made it out of this alive, he was gonna have a field day getting all these stains out he mused to himself as his pried open the side panel of his dispenser. He reached for his toolbox, rummaging around for his wire cutters, twist on connectors, and a new set of wires to replace the ones the sapper had fried as he heard a chorus of bullets being fired from somewhere around the next point over.

He frowned. Those were much closer than they were 15 minutes ago. Better pick up the pace.

With a deft hand, he pulled out the wires and snipped out all the unsalvageable ones, tossing them in his toolbox to properly dispose of later. Twist on connectors wasn't exactly a Good fix to all the problems he knew that damn shock box had caused, but it would be good enough to last him until the end of the round.

...He hoped, at least.

After making quick work of the internals and closing the panel back up, he flipped the switch back on, waiting a few agonizing moments before the dispenser beeped at him a few times and whirred back to life.

Engie let out a weary sigh of relief as it slowly started healing his wounds, giving it a couple whacks with his wrench to get it into somewhat working order. It may have been knocked back down to level 1, but hey, at least it actually started up again! Finally, he had one thing was working in his favor!...

...But only the one thing. Now was the issue of getting his sentry back up, and with his dispenser back at level 1, just waiting around for metal wasn't exactly going to be an option this time.

After scanning the battlefield a few times, a disgruntled noise escaped him. Pyro was nowhere to be found. Just his luck. He grumbled to himself more as he picked his dispenser up and moved it to where he thought it would be at least a little less visible so he could go search for an ammo kit himself, keeping a hand on his pistol and his wits about him as he ventured into a nearby building.

He hated to leave any of his buildings unattended without Pyro around to cover for him (usually in return for a joyride into town the following weekend along with the sugariest fruit flavored item they could get from the local candy store), but he really didn't have the time to sit around and hope for the Chance that they'd 1). be in his field of view and 2). not be too busy to play guard dog for 5 or so minutes (5 minutes they could very understandably use to set some REDs running for the hills. or a fire extinguisher).

And as much as he would love to just waltz into BLU's resupply and pick up all the things he needed with little to no effort, he was currently stationed at second to last and the time it would take him to get there and back would be more than enough time for the REDs to not only destroy BLU's hopes and dreams but also to give way for his teammates to complain about how he hadn't been there to defend them.

(As if he wasn't doing enough for this damn team already.)

So taking a gamble with getting an ammo box was objectively his best bet at the moment. Was he happy about it in any metric? Absolutely not. Sure, he knew his way around the place and he actually knew that the building he was currently in housed the largest ammo kit you could find out in the field, but he also knew that other people knew that too. And that meant that there was a very real chance of running into one of them and not only failing to defend BLU's points and having to put up with his teammates' negging but also dying and gettin sent through respawn in the process.

But that's as if anything was really going his way today.

He hopped up the wooden stairs two at a time, knowing that the ammo kit was somewhere up on the top floor. He'd actually passed by the Medkit on the first and as tempted as he was to heal himself up a little, he also knew that any more time he wasted in there was time that could be used getting a sentry back up.

When he'd reached the second floor, the ammo box was just where he expected it to be, sitting next to a window that looked out over the battlefield, giving him a front and center view of BLU's second to last point. He could just about see a sliver of his dispenser, silently relieved that it was still there. From what he could see, RED and BLU were still fighting it out over the mid point, both teams having captured and then recaptured it several times already, only for the other to take it back.

Currently, it was still BLU's but something told him that if he didn't hurry, that was going to change soon.

He quickly scooped up the ammo box, eyebrows furrowing when the top of it came off with relative ease. Odd. You usually need to do at least a little prying with these suckers to get the tops to pop off. He then rummaged around in it to make sure it had what he needed, confusion deepening when he realized that there weren't any syringe cartridges in the box.

And that's when he heard a slight rustling from somewhere just out of his peripheral vision.

He immediately dropped the box, bullets and miscellaneous parts spilling everywhere as he turned around and reached for his pistol.

However, he ended up getting a spray of syringes to the arm, letting out a strained cry as he instead grabbed his pistol with his other hand and randomly fired it in the direction of where the syringes had come from.

His guesswork was pleasantly met with a very loud "FUCK", his eyes finally focusing on a very irritated looking RED Medic who now sported a bullet wound in his non dominant shoulder.

"You wanna dance? Let's fuckin' tango, buddy," Engie muttered mainly to himself, only just about bearing the pain as he tore anywhere from 4-7 syringes out of his arm and dropped them to the floor.

He tried to shoot his newfound opponent again but his bullets made splinters rather than punctured flesh, Engie fully aware that his normally serviceable aim was probably off thanks to the searing pain in his... well, everything, cursing under his breath regardless.

However, before he could even process what to do next, the enemy Medic made a dive for him, the two of them tussling to the floor and struggling with each other for the right to end someone's life.

Engie was able to momentarily able to wiggle his arm out of the other's grasp, managing a solid hit on RED Medic's face that he was pretty sure ended up breaking his nose.

That really only seemed to make him angrier though, the two of them continuing to wrestle it out until Medic finally managed to come out on top, having practically straddled Engie's chest as he pinned down both of his arms to the ground. The both of them struggled to take in air, Engie still making feeble attempts to escape his captivity with little success.

If this weren't a life or death situation, he probably would've told RED Medic that he was rather handsome, even with a broken nose and blood dripping out his mouth and onto Engie's shirt. Truth be told, Engie had always thought him attractive and if the two of them weren't enemies by uniform color, he probably would've asked him if he wanted to go out for a drink some time.

But even if life or death prevented him from attempting to woo the man who he'd just shot, Engie couldn't help but be immensely frustrated with himself, eventually just letting out a wheeze of defeat as he gave out from exhaustion.

"Just- just fucking do it please, I'm really not goddamn having it right now," He growled out, causing RED Medic to squint and tilt his head at him. After all, it wasn't every day that your enemy practically begged you to off them after they (quite understandably) just tried to strangle you.

"Hey, Stitches, you hear me? Just cut my head off or steal my organs or whatever, make my godawful day into an even more godawful one," He reiterated, Medic unable to suppress a chuckle despite how tired he was.

"Sorry- steal your organs? Do you really think I'm going to do that?" He grinned incredulously.

"Dunno. You just seem like the type," Engie said dryly, Medic letting out a cackle.

"Well just because you made me laugh, I'll make this quick. You don't seem particularly happy right now," Medic vocalized, shifting so that he could pin both of Engie's arms down with one hand and reach for Engie's pistol that had gotten knocked out of his grasp in their scuffle with the other.

Stronger than he looks. Engie couldn't tell if his heart beating faster because he was literally about to die or because an item was added to the list of "reasons why I want to take my enemy out to dinner."

...Might be both.

"Golly gee, what gave that away?" Engie deadpanned, feeling the muzzle of his own pistol pushing against his forehead. RED Medic chuckled again.

"No hard feelings, right my friend?" he smiled at him, almost apologetically. At least Engie thinks it's apologetically. Kinda hard to tell with all the blood that wasn't in his body.

He closed his eyes, bracing himself.

"Nah. None at all."

...

BANG!

...And not even 20 seconds later, he suddenly materialized in BLU's main respawn room, immediately grimacing from the skull splitting headache he was saddled with; the unfortunate side effects of being shot in the head. Respawn could only do so much, after all.

He moved to open the resupply cabinet to just get what he needed and get the hell out of there before he was startled by the intercom crackling to life, Engie's stomach sinking when he heard the very familiar "YOU FAILED" accompanied by almost comically sad music.

Had he really been gone that long? He didn't even hear the Admin announcing that mid had been capped, let alone second to last, and surely he would've heard it even if he was being held up by RED's local handsome devil.

But his teammates slowly filing in with various injuries seemed to confirm their defeat, Engie sighing as he reached into the cabinet for a bottle of aspirin instead of a case of bullets.

"Hrr Mrnrph!" Pyro mumbled out as they made their way in, Scout with his arm around their shoulders for support as he hobbled in as well.

"Yo, Engie, where the hell were you?" Scout frowned, clearly peeved about losing that day's round.

"Yeah, maggot, we thought you were on second to last! Their damn Scout somehow slipped by us and ended up capping both of ours after RED capped mid again," Soldier added, Engie sighing. Of course this was going to be blamed on him.

"Sorry, fellas. Spy managed to sap both my sentry and my dispenser and their Medic got me when I was tryin' to get supplies. I was hoping y'all would be able to hold mid long enough for me to get back but that. Obviously did not happen."

"Oh, so it's our fault now?"

"Hey, I'm not sayin' it's anyone's fault, I'm just sayin' that they got the best of us today. We'll give it another go tomorrow, like we always do."

Scout obviously seemed unhappy by the notion but decided it best to shut his trap when Demo gave him A Look because even Scout knew that Demo was not one to fuck with. Engie knew he didn't actually intend real harm, he just tended to run his mouth with things he didn't necessarily mean. Didn't make his life any easier, though.

"Listen, I think we've all had a long day. Let's just get patched up an' relax before tomorrow," Demo interjected, the rest of the team making various sounds of agreement as the final members of their menagerie made their way in.

As he walked past, Medic gave him a conciliatory look that Engie could only give him a knowing smile in return for. They both knew what it was like for the entire team's failure to be blamed on their shoulders alone. Usually it was Medic who received the brunt of it, especially when he'd just been transferred in, but Engie was no stranger to complaints on his off days about how he should've been better or how could've done more.

It made him want to tear his own ears off. Not only because it was annoying as all hell because you didn't see him out here blaming the entire team's loss on one damn person's slip up, but because it was the kind of shit that he told himself when he was younger and it brought him back to times he didn't necessarily want to remember.

He was suddenly brought out of his brooding by Pyro walking up to him, Scout seemingly having limped his way back into base on his own.

"Mrr rrhrrh hrrph phr nrr rphmm hrr rr phrrhrrk phr rrr," They mumbled out sadly, holding their arms out to offer an apology hug and very much looking like a kicked puppy. Engie let off a soft "aw."

"Shucks, Firefly, it ain't your fault. Can't expect ya to baby me all the time, can I?" He joked, pulling them in anyways. Only a monster could refuse Pyro hugs, after all.

Pyro squeezed him tightly, nearly lifting him off the ground despite the fact that they were only a couple inches taller than he was as Engie was momentarily overwhelmed with the familiar scent of kerosene and singed rubber.

When they finally let go, Engie gave them a gentle pat on the head.l

"You go inside now, hey? I gotta check if my dispenser's still out there and you probably got your own injuries you should have Doc look at," He told them, Pyro nodding at him and giving him an affirmatory wheeze. They then gave him another quick squeeze before waddling their way inside, boots squeaking every so often.

Engie sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. Oh well. Nothing he could do now but prep for tomorrow.

He sat in respawn for a little while waiting for the aspirin to kick in and only decide it was time to get going when he finally felt like his brain wasn't trying to squeeze itself down his spinal cord.

After making the trek to second to last, he was pleasantly surprised to see that his dispenser was still on. And also there at all.

(To be fair, RED and BLU had been fighting over mid for so long that RED's Scout probably hadn't bothered to destroy what wasn't shooting at him in a desperate attempt to end the godforsaken match already. He couldn't say that he'd blame him.)

He was also surprised, though not as pleasantly, to see someone waiting for him. Specifically, someone in glasses and a tie that, even though it was covered in blood, had a face that was both painfully smug and oddly endearing.

Though they were technically now in ceasefire until battle tomorrow, he still instinctively reached for his pistol, blinking and looking down when he realized his holster was empty.

"I believe you're looking for this?" RED Medic asked as he picked said pistol up off of his dispenser, Engie nodding cautiously.

"Relax, dummkopf, I'm not going to shoot you. The bullet that was in your head was actually the last one in the magazine anyways," Medic snorted, demonstrating by pulling the trigger while pointing the weapon to the ground and coming up with nothing but empty clicks.

Regardless, he still offered it to Engie butt first, Engie himself still wary but a little less hesitant as he took a few more steps forward and took it in his hand.

"Apologies. I actually meant to put it back into your holster before you went through respawn but I didn't have adequate time. You pack quite a punch," Medic smirked lightly, Engie's attention suddenly being drawn to his still broken nose.

He grinned sheepishly.

"Heheh, yeah, mama taught me well... No hard feelin's though, yeah?" Engie sticking his pistol in its place and his hand out to the doctor, Medic letting out an amused huff at his own words being used against him.

"No hard feelings," He assured, shaking Engie's hand.

"I should probably be off now, I can practically hear my gaggle of idiots begging me to heal their boo boos from all the way out here," He then snorted, Engie letting out a chuckle.

"All good. I should prolly get the ol' girl back to the workshop. Damn sappers always do a number on the internals," He grimaced, thinking about all proper rewiring and circuit board replacement he was going to have to do, not to mention normal maintenance and cleanup.

"As I've heard. Our own Engineer has some particularly... colorful words on what he thinks of your Spy."

"Bit of a wily bastard, that one. Can't say I blame him," Engie shrugged, leaning against his dispenser for support and suddenly feeling face flush as Medic did the same, the two of them now so close that their elbows touched in the middle.

If Medic noticed, he didn't immediately let on, merely smiling at him.

"That we can all agree on, I think. What is it with Spies and deciding to be bastards? Is it a profession thing, does it just come naturally to them?" He said mirthfully, leaning in close enough that their noses were close to touching.

...Never mind, he absolutely noticed.

"'s gotta be, right? I mean, it's the only explanation for why they're all so dickish. That or the ones we've been in contact with just happen to be persnickety lil fucks," Engie grinned, Medic laughing loudly in response.

It only made him grin even wider. Medic's laugh had to be in a class of its own. Borderline obnoxious in nature but somehow brash and unapologetic while still being absolutely ridiculous.

Man, was it just something to die for (which he.. technically supposed he did).

"Ah, look at me, babbling about. I really should get going before I waste any more of your time," he said when giggles finally stoped threatening to rise out of his throat, Engie feeling a sudden pang of disappointment in his chest. He merely waved him off with a soft "shucks, weren't nothin'" as he tipped his hat, Medic giving him a firm pat on the shoulder.

"It was nice talking with you, Herr Engineer. Perhaps we can meet again some time," He smiled before turning to make his leave.

Engie closed his eyes. This was a bad idea, this was a bad idea, don't do it, don't do it Dell, don't FUCKING do it-

"Hey, uh. Stitches."

Medic paused before turning around again.

"Are you... free this weekend?"

An amused glint suddenly appeared in Medic's eyes.

"Well seeing as we all have weekends off, yes, I should be. Why do you ask?"

"You, uh. You wanna grab a drink with me, this Saturday, maybe? I know this pretty good place not too far out and uh. I dunno, 'd be fun to uh. See ya again outside of work, I guess," Engie stumbled out, putting a hand on the back of his neck.

"...I'd like that. I'd like that a lot," Medic smiled, Engie's face lighting up.

"Great! Uhm. I uh, I guess. Meet me on y'all's second to last at about 6? I know how to avoid all the cameras, so," Engie offered, Medic raising an eyebrow at him.

"...Hey, when you live out your days fighting people to the death for an old dinosaur who would skin you alive and turn you into the coat given the chance, finding out where her cameras and all their blindspots are isn't that much of a hassle. We're actually in one right now. Wouldn't've asked you out otherwise," He shrugged, Medic holding his hands up in response.

"I'm not one to judge. Whatever gets me out of playing team mama for the night. I'll just tell them I joined a book club or whatever. And if they don't believe me... well I think a saw to the skull might convince them," Medic said, suddenly pulling out his Ubersaw with a malicious grin.

Engie had to physically restrain himself from saying "hot" in response.

"Heheh, yeah, I bet it might. I'll uh. See you later then," He coughed out, moving to put his dispenser into compact mode and pack it back into his toolbox.

When he stood up with it resting on his shoulder, however, Medic was standing right in front of him, nearly causing it to slip out of his hands.

Medic barely stifled a laugh at his shock, gently removing his hardhat and leaning down to give him a kiss on the forehead.

"It's a date then," He hummed cheerily before putting Engie's hardhat back on his head and making his return to RED, leaving Engie with his hat slightly askew and his face moderately flushed.

And that's when if hit him. A date. He had just asked his actual, literal enemy who had shot him in the head about 30 minutes ago, on a date. And he said yes.

He didn't know if he wanted to scream, punch something, or throw himself off a bridge. Probably all three, if he was honest.

Despite all that, he practically forced himself to turn around and begin making his way back to BLU, readjusting his tool box every so often so it wouldn't slip out of his hands. What the hell was he doing, breaking contract like this? He means sure, he wasn't particularly one for rules anyhow, he's pretty sure he's committed more than a few atrocities against the heavens in his lifetime, and the Admin wasn't always on his case for every little infraction he'd ever made anyways. But between her and God, it was the Admin he feared more and he knew that if there was one rule that the she enforced, it was that cross faction relations were NOT tolerated and were more than a warrant for termination.

Termination of contract or termination of your life? Depended on how nice she was feeling that day.

Needless to say, he was very frustrated with himself.

But then he remembered how drop dead (haha) gorgeous Medic was even when he was bleeding all over Engie's shirt and the way hearing his laugh had made him felt and the way that glint made it look like he had stars in his eyes and...

...Aw hell, if he was going to get fired (or die! both was very possible) for this he might as well go down after having had a good time.

Now all he had to do was make it to Saturday. While also not giving anything away.

Piece of fucking cake.

#tf2 #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 science party #medic x engineer #am #fic #c's writing

[mythicalcanary-literature]

FanFiction - Crossing the Stars

Hetalia (c) Hidekaz Himaruya

FTL: Faster Than Light (c) Subset Games

[CHAPTER LIST]

Author’s Note: This FanFiction is a crossover between the sci-fi strategy game ‘FTL: Faster Than Light’ by Subset Games and the manga/anime called ‘Hetalia’ by Hidekaz Himaruya. The story will follow closely to the events of the rougue-like gameplay in FTL and the human characters will be replaced with the human versions of the national personifications in ‘Hetalia’. This is a fun personal project and it requires no knowledge of either fandom to enjoy this story. I’d encourage checking the original sources out though! Use of screenshots in this FanFiction are to supplement the storytelling to help plot the course of our heroes’ journey in the universe. Whatever the outcome of the gameplay I base this story on (as each playthrough is very unique) will be translated into the plot of this story. i.e. If the spaceship gets damaged, it gets damaged in the story. If a character dies in the game, they’re dead in this fiction. (Please note that I find this kind of storytelling entertaining to play/write and I plan to do more in the future if time allows!)

Chapter 2

The crew of the S.S. APH pondered their options. At the Exit Beacon of their first Civilian Sector they had a choice on where to jump. Both branching sectors were civilian areas, one was under Engi Control and the other under Zoltan Control.

Captain Alfred F. Jones brought up the file on the Engi species. “It says here that Engi dudes are made of nanomachines. That’s pretty damn sweet! Maybe we could get them to be our mechanics?”

Arthur Kirkland, the weapons master, pulled up the file on their second option, the Zoltans. “Apparently both the Engi and Zoltans are allies. We could encounter either species in either sector so we have a coin toss here. Zoltans are energy beings, meaning that they can act as a kind of battery to save us some engine power. That’s rather handy.”

Their engines expert Francis Bonnefoy hummed in approval. “Now that you mention it, I wouldn’t mind having either of those creatures on board. An expert mechanic? A spare battery, pardon ze term… and if we can encounter them in any of these two sectors I don’t think we could lose.” 

“It says that the Engi are secret allies of the Federation. That bodes very well for us. Provided the Rebels haven’t corrupted them, of course,” Arthur added thoughtfully.

Their American Captain beamed. “Hell yeah! I guess that means the Zoltan dudes are allies as well. Can’t go wrong here.”

Arthur coughed. “Actually, if we enter Zoltan territory and we’re attacked by hostiles whom have a Zoltan Energy Shield we could face problems. Those energy shields are a bitch to destroy. We need to avoid as many problematic scenarios as possible.”

“Agreed,” the Frenchman said quickly. “I am still shaken from ze last battles.”

“Engi Controlled then?” Alfred suggested. “Back to your stations! Let’s get this important cargo on the move!”

A cautionary message popped up on Alfred’s monitor. It warned them that Mantis had been preying on the Engi core worlds and those insectoids were a rather violent race. He hoped for a peaceful voyage this go-round. He programmed in the next jump, reluctantly avoiding the temptation of visiting the store located at a nearby beacon. If they could harvest more scrap maybe they could invest in some more kickass weaponry or upgrades!

A rather disgruntled British voice chimed over the announcement system. “OH FUCKING HELL!” As tempted as the Captain was to discourage swearing, he allowed it in this case. Out of the frying pan and into the literal fire!

Francis gasped, staring out of his nearby airlock window at the super-giant Class M star! They were too close, they were going to cook like that rather delicious duck l’orange he made for his crew before they left the Federation space port back home. “Oh non non non!”

DANGER! SOLAR FLARES! DANGER! SOLAR FLARES! DANGER!

“Incoming dumbass Pirate Scout ship! Kirkland lock weapons on their shields and weapons rooms before we grill like a BBQ!” Captain Jones commanded as he anxiously kept an eye on their FTL Drive charge. He really did think those pirates were dumbasses, who dares lurk around a giant star to attack passersby at the risk of setting their own ship alight? Idiots.

The S.S. APH successfully damaged the pirate ship but the enemy return shot rocked the weapons room. FIRE!

Arthur hardly knew what hit him, but the searing heat was enough of a tip-off to tell him that if he didn’t move right now he was going to die. Scrambling to his feet, he reached for the fire extinguisher and tried to combat the flames. This was very bad.

His best friend’s voice hailed him over the comms. “Artie, get out of there! I’m gonna open the airlocks to snuff out the fire. Go literally anywhere where you have oxygen.”

“Aye, sir!” he acknowledged, coughing from the smoke as he fled to the shields room. The portside and starboard side airlocks shot open along with a couple of doors into the weapons room draining the air rapidly to deny the fire any fuel.

As soon as the fire was out, Alfred closed all of the doors. That was all kinds of horrible. The pirate ship was repairing and had shields online. If they could get their weapons…

The super-giant Class M star wanted in on the action. It stretched a solar flare right out to the warring ships!

WARNING! SHIELDS CRITICAL!

Good thing Kirkland kept that fire extinguisher. Fire seemed to be following him today. Alfred sighed from the Bridge and called his crew. “Artie, get out of shields, I’ll open the starboard airlocks. Bonnefoy! Assist Kirkland in weapons, we need to get those back online.”

“Aye-aye, Captain!”

In the weapons room, Arthur and Francis united to repair the systems. The Frenchman quickly pulled his on-and-off frienemy into a hug and checked him for injuries. “Mon Dieu! I am happy you aren’t too badly hurt. Ze shields are down, we have to work quickly. Are you well?”

Arthur huffed and pushed him away. “Yes, I’m fine. Let’s get to work before more fire follows me.” He was feeling a little paranoid that he had pissed off a sun god or some crap like that.  They had to get away.

The pirates were fighting well! They destroyed their surveillance system, not that it was a vital system at this point in time but it was extra hull damage that our heroes could not afford to take. “Bonnefoy! Shields are broken, meet me there. Artie, I see weapons are online, stay there and give them hell!”

Give them hell indeed! The Englishman dealt the deathblow to the pirates and was glad to dust his hands of the bastards. Unfortunately the star was not done with them and heavily damaged their oxygen systems and the weapons room again. The battle was won but the war wasn’t over!

“I’m off to repair O2!” Arthur announced as he fled from his post at weapons to stop them from suffocating. Alfred acknowledged. “Francis, join him! Get the oxygen back online, we can repair other things later but our ship can’t handle more of this. I’m gonna jump us away!”

“Oui! Please get us out of here, I am sweaty and it’s gross.” The pair split directions and Alfred slammed in the co-ordinates of their next destination at the Bridge. If this was what was in the stars for them in this sector they might not live to see the end and that thought was terrifying.

The next leap took them to an existing battle between a Mantis ship harassing a small Engi research vessel. Alfred was almost ready to command an intervention but the insectoids fled as they entered their space. The Engi Captain hailed them, offering thanks for showing up, and gave the S.S. APH a new drone schematic.

Captain Jones gasped in awe. “OH SHIT YEAH! A BOARDING DRONE?! YEEEEEAH!”

His friends joined him on the Bridge. Arthur blinked in surprise. “A Boarding Drone? Wow, that’s powerful tech! Too bad we don’t have a drone room.”

“Dudes, we get one! Or we can sell it if we can’t, whatever, but damn, those Engi guys were nice.”

Francis stretched. “Let’s keep moving, mes amis. Ze Rebels are always on our tails.”

Arthur beamed. A Boarding Drone? That would be fun to use against the Rebel Fleet.

“Alright, dudes, you’re gonna hate me for this, but I’m gonna backtrack to the store. Our hull is fucked and if we can get a drone room to use this fancy-ass tech we’re sure as hell getting it!” Arthur chided him for his horrible use of the English language but agreed that the risk might be worth it. Their hull was already fifty percent damaged, it could spell death if they carried on without fixing it.

Luck turned in their favour! Alfred authorised the purchase of the new drone room to house the Boarding Drone, and it also came with a free Defence Drone Mark I! Bargain. They spent the rest of their scrap on hull repairs and moved on to the next beacon.

They backtracked to an earlier beacon and leapt right on towards the distress signal. Captain Jones listened to the plea and cringed. Oh boy, this was not a pretty distress call but he didn’t feel that they could risk a rescue mission. He called his crew to the Bridge to make an informed decision.

Francis peered through the window in surprise. “It’s an evacuation.”

Alfred hailed the fleeing vessels. “Yo, this is Captain Jones of the Federation Star Ship APH, what’s the sitch?”

Arthur glared at him for once again disregarding etiquette. He ignored his friend.

One of the fleeing ships responded; “Help! We’re being overrun by some sort of giant alien spiders!”

The Frenchman squealed. “WHAT? That’s disgusting! Call pest control!”

Arthur whacked him across the head. “I think literally anyone coming to their aid IS pest control.”

Alfred winced. “Giant alien spiders? Seriously?”

The fleeing ship yelled, “Help us or flee yourselves! Those things are evil!”

Arthur bit his lip. “Sending an away team isn’t advisable, Alfred. I don’t think we can afford to waste more time with the Rebels on our heels and we don’t know what we’re up against.”

Francis nodded. “Oui, I say we go. They’re already evacuating, we should stay ze course.”

The young Captain sighed and agreed resolutely. “Yeah, you’re totally right. Back to your stations, we have a mission to complete!”

“Heads-up, all! We’re navigating an asteroid field.” Alfred paused and checked the radar. “Incoming pirates! Kirkland, power down the Artemis missile and channel it into the drones. I’m gonna power down the medbay to support the Defence Drone, it’s gonna take out the asteroids for us.” Arthur switched the power routes and confirmed that the drone was ready.

“Ah shoot, it looks like we’ve got another coward on our hands. Enemy vessel is powering up its FTL Drive!”

“I’ve destroyed their weapons, sir!” Arthur replied, prepared to change tactics. “Thank God for this drone, it’s stopping the asteroids from striking us. Their hull is weak, the pirates won’t last long.”

True to his word, the pirates perished soon after and they could reap the rewards. There was no time to spare, they had to continue the journey!

“Hey, dudes! We have a Rebel Auto douche here with a sweet cache. Let’s attack it and steal its shit.”

Arthur audibly sighed over the comms system. “Is that an order, Captain or are you daydreaming aloud?”

“HAHAHAHA! Shut it and fire up the weapons, bro.”

“How the hell did you earn your Captain’s badge again?” he asked rhetorically.

“By bein’ a HERO, of course! Fire up!”

“I’ve taken out their weapons, Captain!” Sadly, that wasn’t enough to stop an enemy missile from screwing with their shields.

“Shields are down! That goddamn drone is setting everything on fire! Francis, run to weapons, I need to open the airlocks!”

“Oui, I’ll keep Arthur company and hope he doesn’t attract fire again,” Francis responded, running down the halls.

Arthur scoffed. “Quiet, idiot, or I’ll make sure you’re in the way of the fire beam.”

“So cruel!” the Frenchman whined as he entered the weapons room. The Englishman stuck out his tongue and switched the Burst Laser to lock on the drones as Alfred opened the airlocks to control the drain of oxygen.

Once the fires were extinguished, Alfred shut the airlocks and commanded Francis to repair the shields and medbay.  The Auto-Assault ship exploded and left them with a decent reward. Arthur examined the weapon from the cache. A Healing Burst? That could be useful but he was hoping for something a little better.

The next beacon was a store! The Engi hive operating it seemed friendly enough and Alfred treated Arthur to a special weapons augmentation. As the Engi repaired their hull, Arthur installed the ‘Automated Re-Loader’. An extra ten percent recharge rate on their weapons could really give them an advantage!

Feeling refreshed, the crew embarked to the next beacon, painfully aware of how close the Rebel Fleet was getting to them.

“Yo, crewdudes! I found a dormant Rebel Automated Scout here. I’m gonna try and download its data stores. You guys chill or whatever.”

A FEW MOMENTS LATER…

“Uh… Yeah, Artie, can ya do me a favour and like… blast the ever living hell outta this thing? I miiiight have activated it into fight mode.”

Francis could have sworn he heard the audible facepalm from his friend, but then again he could have done that deliberately over the announcement system.

Fortunately these ships were quick to deal with and Arthur destroyed it without putting up much of a fight. They collected the loot and moved on with their lives.

The next beacon was located around a pulsar. A small research station orbited it, but it seemed to be abandoned. Alfred scanned the area and flipped on the Red Alert sirens. “BATTLE STATIONS, PEEPS. WE HAVE MORE PIRATES!”

“I thought this was Engi space? All we’ve seen are Rebels and Pirates!” Francis complained over the comms system.

“They could be Engi pirates? We don’t have the scanners to see into their ships,” Arthur reasoned as he powered up the weapons. “Brace yourselves for ion waves, everyone. Our electronics are going to go haywire.”

DANGER! ELECTROMAGNETIC WAVES! DANGER!

The enemy weapons room was targeted and blasted to pieces. An ion wave disrupted their engines and shields, whereas the enemy had a mild disruption to their weapons and oxygen rooms.

“We have another runner! Take these losers down, Kirkland!”

“I’m doing my best! The bloody pulsar knocked out my weapons charge.”

“Shit, they’re getting away!”

There was a tense moment as the pirates used their FTL Drive to flee. The crew of the S.S. APH were worried that they would alert the Rebel Fleet about their location. This did not happen and they could breathe again.

“Fuck, that was intense!” Alfred called over the announcement system. “Look, things are gonna get ugly. We’ll pitstop at the next store but we’re gonna encounter the Rebels at the Exit Beacon. Artie, be on high alert when we get there.”

“I’m already on high alert, but I will do my best to fend them off so we can get to the next sector.”

“Good man. Franny, come with me, we’ll get the supplies this time.”

The Engi trader was a nice entity. He showed the crewmembers his wares and allowed them to discuss budget. In the end, they settled for a Flak Gun Mark I to potentially give them an advantage over multiple shields on enemy vessels along with an extra bit of fuel to tide them over. That was it, that was ALL of their scrap, which included the extra currency they made by selling their Healing Burst. They hoped it was enough to keep them alive.

Captain Jones gathered his friends in the Bridge with a grave expression. “Okay, so the Rebels are definitely at the Exit Beacon, no escapin’ that. Just do your best and try not to die. Our priority is to buy time to escape, alright? We’re not aiming for a win, we’re aiming for an escape.”

Francis looked nervous. “I don’t want to die!”

Arthur sat on the pilot’s chair and rested his head in his hands. “We all know the risks. Let’s not be pessimistic. We’ll either succeed in getting through the beacon or they will blow us to kingdom come. We’ve better head there right now. I just hope they haven’t had time to set-up anti-ship batteries…”

“Good luck, guys! I believe in you!” They all hugged for a brief moment before marching off to their stations. Here goes nothing!

As Alfred suspected, the enemy ship had two layers of shields to deal with. The investment in the Flak Gun was worth it. Arthur warmed up the weapons and aimed the Flak Gun at the enemy engines with additional fire power aimed at their shields in the form of the Artemis missile. He also noticed that they had a teleportation pad. Well, this was about to get bloody!

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED!

“Bonnefoy! Get out of engines and man the doors! I’m opening the back airlocks, don’t get caught in it, I’ll try and suffocate the bastard!” Alfred called over a private comm link as he monitored the single human intruder.

“Aye, Captain!” Francis responded, racing to his new post as the engine and oxygen rooms were starved of air. The intruder was going to regret beaming aboard alright!

In weapons, Arthur cringed as his Flak debris missed the FTL Drive. He was counting on the Artemis missile to destroy the shields to help things along. The shields were hit on both ships and they tried their best to remain stable.

WARNING! SHIELDS CRITICAL!

The oxygen room was under attack by the one intruder that was slowly suffocating because he didn’t bring a space suit. The S.S. APH’s shields were vulnerable, which meant that the Rebel Elite Fighter could definitely land more hits. This wasn’t looking great and the FTL was taking its sweet time to charge up!

Francis did his best to hold the doors firmly secured shut. This was difficult when they never invested any scrap to upgrade their reactor and subsequently their subsystems further. He could not leave his post whilst the intruder remained on board, which left the engines unmanned so that he couldn’t assist Alfred with dodging attacks, and if he left the doors to repair the broken shields Arthur would be attacked by the intruder, no doubt. This was a horrible situation and it was going to get worse.

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED! WARNING! SHIELDS CRITICAL!

Arthur managed to damage the Rebel’s engines, shields and weapons but chaos had already reigned on the S.S. APH. Enemy retaliation had damaged their piloting systems, shields and engines. On top of that, there was a fire in the drone control room and the entire oxygen system had been destroyed. They were in major trouble!

WARNING! SHIELDS CRITICAL!

WARNING! HULL AT 75%!

It was a never-ending sound of alarms on the ship. Alfred was stuck repairing the piloting system so that they could continue charging the FTL Drive, Francis had left the door system room to try to fix the shields to give them SOME protection as Arthur madly aimed their weapons at the enemy ship.

Arthur panicked and knew he had to do something or they’d be stuck as a waiting target for the Rebels to destroy any minute now. He ran to the engines to repair the FTL Drive. “Alfred! I’m repairing the engines. We can’t leave if they’re broken!”

“The weapons are auto-firing, right?!” he called back.

“Yes! I…” Wow, the air was constricting in this room. He continued working as hard as he could to get the engines back online but he couldn’t focus for some reason… “We need to get vital systems online!”

The Rebels were close to destruction but that felt like a hollow promise of victory. The teleportation room activated again and now they had THAT to deal with too.

Alfred was sweating. The drone room was directly behind the Bridge and that was completely on fire now. He couldn’t run to help his friends and they were losing! He checked the ship surveillance to see how everyone was and his eyes widened in horror. “FRANCIS, GET TO THE OXYGEN ROOM NOW. FIX IT QUICKLY, ARTHUR’S DYING!”

“What?!” came the Frenchman’s startled response. “I’ll head there now!”

“ARTIE, BUDDY! Your vitals are critical. Are you conscious?! Get out of there and head to the medbay right now. ARTHUR! Move it! Please…”

Arthur was hanging on by a thread. He could barely move but he had to get out of there. Somehow he got to his feet and felt his way out of the engine room. His health was waning and he almost fainted en route to the medbay. He had to get there. To heal. To breathe. There was so much NOISE. Where was medbay again?

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED!

Arthur collapsed on a bed in the medical wing. Luckily the system was able to start helping him to convalesce but he was extremely close to death! Thankfully he made it there in time.

Francis was struggling. It took a lot of effort but the oxygen was back online! He coughed and hurried over to the medbay as his health depleted further. He was the second member close to death that day. He saw Arthur and relaxed, letting the system heal his body.

BOOM! The enemy vessel exploded leaving them with a nice bit of fuel to move on when they weren’t burning to death. That was one less worry for Alfred but he had plenty more to deal with post-battle. Namely the one intruder destroying their weapons room!

Alfred sighed with relief and spent a moment recovering. He checked on his friends’ vital signs... they seemed to be improving in the medbay. Good. That was too close for comfort. He exhaled and began opening most of the airlocks, not only to deal with the raging fire in the room behind him but also to make the intruder suffer.

He watched as the oxygen fled the ship and waited for his best friend to regain consciousness. They had to get this ship running again pronto or they’d face another vessel, which they can’t afford to do!

WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED!

Alfred made a beeline to the medbay once most of the fire was extinguished. He hugged Arthur once he woke up and dragged him to the door systems room. “Good job there, Artie. Sorry you almost died, but we’re alive now. I need you to focus and help me repair these doors or we’ll never be able to close them. Francis repaired the oxygen room, he’s healing at the moment, and we have an intruder on board and the Rebels are kicking our asses but we’ll be fine! Just help me fix shit so we can leave, okay?”

The shorter blond blinked his emerald eyes tiredly at him and nodded, helping to restore the systems. He put out the fire in the door room with Alfred and was feeling well enough to take back responsibilities on the ship.

Once all of the fires were extinguished on the ship, Alfred remotely sealed the doors and responded to an alert from the medbay. The intruder had decided to launch an attack on Francis whom was still recovering!

“Gotcha, Rebel scum!” Alfred yelled as he barrelled into the intruder and started hand-to-hand combat with the enemy. Arthur woke up his bearded friend and together the three of them eliminated the rebel for good. Panting, the crewmates gathered their wits as the medbay healed them.

Francis looked pale. “I think we almost died. For real that time.”

Arthur bit his lip. “I should have known that something was off when I tried repairing the FTL Drive. I didn’t realise the oxygen was knocked out, I should have gone there, but my thought was to fix the engines so we could flee.”

Alfred sat down on a bed and ran a hand through his hair. “Ugh, that was horrible. I almost lost you both. I don’t want to pilot this ship on my own, we’re already a tiny crew.”

“Well we made it!” Francis chimed in optimistically.

Alfred hugged them all tightly before standing up with purpose. “Now we’re all healed, let’s get this ship functioning again and then get the fuck outta dodge!”

Arthur stretched and saluted half-heartedly. “I’ll fix drones, Jones should take engines and Bonnfoy fix my bloody weapons. When we get to the next sector we REALLY need to focus on upgrades if we can. Our reactor power is weak and we can’t use all of our systems to full capacity.”

“I know that, dude,” the Captain scoffed. “Let’s just get out of here and then worry about the technicalities.”

With repairs completed, Alfred went back to the Bridge alone. The sector map branched out into two locations. They could either go to another Engi Controlled sector, not that this sector bore much fruit for the S.S. APH, or they could risk everything and attempt to survive in Rebel Controlled territory. He groaned. Being a space Captain wasn’t as cool as he thought it would be. He wished he had convinced his friends to stay home instead.

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT SECTOR...

Chapter 2 - END

[CHAPTER LIST]

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[Cover Art] This image was drawn in HB pencil and painted in watercolour paints on the 8th August 2021. It was digitally enhanced in GIMP Image Editor on the 9th August 2021. Paper type = 130 gsm  

This chapter was written on the 30th-31st August 2021.

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Please do not repost, modify, resell or claim this work as your own.

(Reblogging is fine, though!)

[Mythical Canary Info]

#Crossing the Stars #Chapter 2 #FanFiction #FanFic #FTL #FTL: Faster Than Light #FTL Faster Than Light #Hetalia #APH #ヘタリア #crossover #prose #Prose by Mythical Canary #literature #Mythical Canary Literature #MythicalCanary #sci-fi #science fiction #science fantasy #manga #anime #story #series #game #games #gaming #fiction #Fan Art #FanArt

[thetriggeredhappy]

idea: scout gets confused and flustered, because team calls him "pretty boy", but tries to play it off -🦂

scout tf2 is a fuckin prettyboy dude he just Is. (short one, no romance, warning for swearing and that’s it)

-

To be totally honest, he wasn’t even paying attention to the conversation. He was sat on a crate a short distance from a chunk of the team, zoned out looking over the tape on his bat and thinking about whether he could get away with trying to adopt a pet again when work was over. But he tuned back in on the last few sentences just enough to process them, and was paying enough attention to properly hear the last two.

“Well, that’s that, then, unless anyone has any complaints,” Engie said.

“Dunno, someone go ask the prettyboy,” Sniper said offhandedly.

Scout looked up, frowning, and saw that almost all eyes were on him. “What?” he asked, confused.

“We were thinkin’ about tryin’ another night out as a team—“ Engie started to explain, but Scout cut him off.

“Nah, nah, what’d *you* say?” Scout asked, pointing at Sniper.

“...What, me calling you a prettyboy?” Sniper asked, looking a little amused.

Scout blinked, eyebrows furrowed. “...You can’t just use any words in any order you want,” he said, very much confused.

A pause from the team at large. “Lad, you’re telling me you don’t *know*?” Demo asked, looking equal parts baffled and delighted.

“Know what?”

Snickering from the team at large. “You can’t be serious,” Sniper said firmly. “You’re—*Scout*. You’re absolutely taking the piss. You’re not serious. You *do* know you’re a bloody prettyboy, right?”

He felt his face heating up. “Like hell I am! How the hell am I a prettyboy?” he challenged.

Sniper gestured at Scout in his entirety as if that should speak for itself. Scout frowned harder.

“Look, lad, you’re the bloody *standard* for it,” Demo elaborated. “You’re one leather jacket and motorcycle away from me mum warning me off of ya.”

“Not a dad on the planet who’d leave you alone in a room with their daughter,” Sniper nodded.

“Look like you should be peddling cigarettes to the classmates a year behind you whilst combing your hair,” Demo agreed.

“I’m fuckin’ 25, Cyclops,” Scout deadpanned.

“That why you still eat candy bars for breakfast and read comic books?” Sniper asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Fuck you,” Scout clipped, rolling his eyes.

“What are we arguing about this time?” Spy asked, walking over along with Heavy to join the rest of the team.

“Yo, Spy, hey,” Scout asked, seeing an out. “Snipes and Cyclops and Hardhat are goin’ off on some bullshit thing—they’re sayin’ I’m a goddamn prettyboy.”

“Right?” Spy asked after a second as if waiting for the part that Scout was confused about.

Laughter from the team. Scout’s face was on fire. “Fuck you guys,” he said decisively, starting to pout.

“Why exactly is it such a bad thing?” Medic asked, rolling his eyes. “Is it not a compliment?”

“Because—“ Scout started to explain, and stopped. Thought for a minute. “Well, because prettyboys are, it’s, I dunno! It just is!”

“Scooter, there’s nothin’ wrong with it,” Engie assured, laughing a little. “If anything, we’d need a prettyboy or two to balance out the general demographic we’ve got on the team, see? Any more bodybuilder types and we’d need to make a darn swimsuit calendar.”

Soldier flexed to demonstrate. He had an excellent point.

Scout thought for a second, brows furrowed. “...So what you’re sayin’ is I should get a leather jacket?”

“And sunglasses,” Demo confirmed, laughing a little.

“Oi,” Sniper complained, hand rising protectively to his own shades.

Another pause for a few seconds. “...Let’s circle back around to that bit you did about the swimsuit calendar,” Scout decided, pointing at Engie. “What are you fuckin’ talkin’ about? Who’s gonna go on that besides Star-Spangled Batshit over here?”

And thus an argument began, and the topic was dropped long enough for Scout to finish sorting some shit out in his own head, at least for a little while. At least until he figured out where he was gonna get some sunglasses.

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #shut up me #my fanfiction #everybody talks #scout tf2 is the patron saint of prettyboys and dumb bitches everywhere

[fanciful-of-life]

This Time

Buck sat in silence looking out the fire engine window with his hands folded in his lap and his head leaned back against the square headrest of the seat as buildings whizzed by and the sirens above blared, letting those in their path know to get out of the way, heading to yet another emergency. Bumping in the seat as each turn and pot hole is hit at high speed. Eddie sitting ramrod straight, staring straight ahead face passive . No words being spoken between them. Another shift, another day, of the cold shoulder.

He’s seeing Christopher every chance he can get now. Not realizing how much he missed the little boy’s smell, crooked smile and admiring gaze until that first yell of “Buck” and arms thrown around him. Eddie disappearing as soon as he got to their place, while they played and watched movies. Even building a lego firehouse. A Christopher version of a lego firehouse. He was just relieved when Christopher asked him what he thought the creation was and he answered correctly and that smile he received in return that if a heart had the ability to cry would have burst into an ocean far surpassing that of the tsunami they survived in tears.

Shame though stayed behind coursing through him as the nervousness finally subsided but the shame stayed as his little boy babbled on and on about how much he missed him, sleepovers he’s going on now and school. It wasn’t until that shame slammed into his gut of distancing himself from Christopher that he realized that yes he is indeed his little boy. Just like he was Christopher’s Buck.

Shame about Eddie’s dirty little secret.

How could he not know about that?

It’s been forty-three days since Bobby told him he was being reinstated, thirty-two days since his first day back to the 118 and twenty-eight days since he found out about Eddie and the fight club.

It was by accident, of course. Eddie hadn’t spoken a word to him, even when Bobby in his stern “Remember, my house my rules” greeted him at the lockers with the rest of the crew. Then with a slight smirk and a hug with what Bobby would never admit to as misty, watery eyes and an “oh, kid. What am I going to do with you?” The hugs had come in procession. Eddie had just walked off.

As promised Bobby did make him regret it with scut work duty, for a week. The Captain has softened since becoming a step dad. And become more forgiving. Athena had stayed out of it until she saw him one shift, slapped the back of his head and then hugged him. “Talk to your family before being an idiot again.” Were her words to him, then promptly invited him to dinner that night. Bobby opening his mouth and snapping it shut with one glance from Athena. They spent dinner calmly talking. Bobby feeling betrayed. Buck telling him he didn’t know the lawyer was going to use any of that. He thought he was just talking. Telling both Bobby and Athena about the lawyer telling him he should take the millions offered to him instead of listening to him and saying he just wanted his job back. Athena was still coughing after the wine she had spit out at the mention of Buck turning down millions to return to the 118. The lawyer trying to convince him they would never take him back.

He had missed the look between Bobby and Athena, the first of many that night. Never heard her “manipulative bastard.” Buck had explained he felt Bobby had lost faith in him and the hurt at finding out he lied to him instead of just telling him from the beginning that day in the hospital. About how it hurt to have the first man he felt had a positive influence on him, actually believe in him, lie to him was his breaking point. He might of even ended up telling him about his own father well after dinner was over. Athena slipping away to bed with tearful eyes. A kiss in the lips for Bobby, a kiss in the cheek for Buck as the two men kept talking. He had ended up spending the night at Bobby’s insistence, taking the guest room. Things had been different since then between the two. Yes, Bobby was still The Captain but if he treated Buck just a tiny bit different, gave him a bit more praise, nobody said anything. The fire fam had forgiven him. Christopher had forgiven him.

But not Eddie. And not himself.

So, of course Eddie wouldn’t tell him something like being in an illegal fight club as he threw down with strangers every night. It was when Buck got a phone call in the middle of the night from Carla. Christopher had spiked a fever and she couldn’t reach Eddie.

Buck had driven straight over, not taking any chances and with the help of Carla; saying fuck 911 drove him to the ER himself. Where he stayed with him, surprised to find out he was listed as a guardian in case of emergencies in Carla’s medical file on Christopher she keeps up to date. Maybe even intimidating a resident, ignoring flirting nurses and demanding a damn real doctor not some physician assistant.

Eddie had not been able to be reached all night.

Buck finally drove them home around 4a.m. after the doctor cleared him of any urgent medical conditions. It was just the simple flu. He didn’t care what it was. His boy was sick, that was urgent enough. Carla stayed in the car with a sleeping Christopher as Buck found a twenty-four hour pharmacy, waited then paid for the medication the doctor prescribed with instructions to call his pediatrician as soon as they opened if he got worse during the rest of the night. He had everything done to Christopher that night printed out on the spot to add to Carla’s records.

A frantic Eddie had stormed out of the house as soon as the headlights of Buck’s car entered the driveway. Ignoring Buck, Eddie picked up his son and walked into the house. In the rush to get to the Emergency Room Carla had forgotten her phone and hell would freeze over before he called Buck. They never spoke of it. Buck ended up calling Carla to see how Christopher was feeling and even stopping by after his shift to check in his boy. Maybe the oversized Teddy Bear he took him may have been too much but screw it, he owed the kid a teddy bear.

He owed the kid the world.

He even took him to Build-a-Bear as soon as he was cleared by his doctor to go out. Christopher just might have ended up making a bear dressed as a firefighter. Memories of him on the pier saying he wants to be a firefighter when he grows up went through Buck’s mind as Christopher proudly showed it to him. Knowing now what he should have known then, he would raise hell to get that kid on the LAFD, even as a Fire Marshall.

It was not being able to reach Eddie that made him curious, his gut telling him he needed to know. He may act on his emotions and impulsive at times but his gut instinct he always followed. So, on a night when Christopher was at his friend’s house for a sleep over Buck tailed Eddie home at a distance. Not like he didn’t know where the guy lived. He followed a bit closer as he came out of the house, got off the interstate onto some old dirt roads and came to a makeshift lot of disarray parked cars. Getting out he smelled the smoke before seeing the barrel fires lighting up the night sky. Old tires stacked up to make a circle. No, a ring. That had two men beating the living shit out each other in the middle of it. People crowded around, cheering them on as blood splattered onto the ground.

Then he heard the name Diaz being called. A shirtless Eddie stepping up to face another man. He was both disgusted and impressed with Eddie’s fighting capability.

He edged closer to the ring, making sure to stay hidden so Eddie couldn’t spot him, but he could get a better look at him. That’s when he saw it. Eddie’s eyes. The anger. The rage. The emotionless death in them.

Oh, Eddie. What are you doing and what have I done?

That was twenty-eight nights ago. He followed him every night, watching, praying to a God he wasn’t sure existed. His cell phone on in case of an emergency Carla might have with Christopher since his father was too busy being the idiot that only thought about himself he accused him of being in a grocery store forty-five days ago. According to Carla when asked it was around that time frame Eddie started paying her for extra night hours unless Christopher was at a sleep over. Which he was having more and more of.

Buck may not be on Eddie’s talking list but Eddie was on Buck’s watching over list. Every night, just to make sure nothing happened so Christopher wouldn’t lose a father along with a mother. Screw it. Who was he kidding? He felt the shame, the guilt. He wanted his team back so he fought for them but ended up losing a family he didn’t realize he had until it was too late.

Evan “The Ladies Man” Buckley is in love with Edmundo Diaz and it was staring him right in his blind as fuck face. Christopher right there tied with his daddy. He’d die for both of them and he went through hell every night watching Eddie taking his anger out with his fists. Wanting to but unable to run into that ring and yell stop this Eddie.

But the dead eyes as punch after punch kept him from doing so.

Arriving on scene of the accident, Bobby quickly gave out orders as they went to work. Eddie with the jaws of life and an I don’t need your help.

“Eddie, Buck’s on the jaws as you lift the car roof so Hen and Chimney can get to the little boy.”

It turned out the father ran a red light and the back where the little boy sat got slammed. As Hen and Chimney worked on the little boy Eddie went off on the father, Bobby and two rookie police officers holding him back as Athena put him in the back seat of her squad car. Unfortunately, the other driver didn’t see the car to stop in time, hitting them head on. They died on impact, the windshield slicing their throat as they flew through it, a teenage girl not wearing their seatbelt and texting.

Bobby telling Eddie to meet him in the office when they get back to the firehouse as they loaded the truck back up. Hen shaking her head at Bobby, signaling the boy didn’t make it. Eddie slamming his hand against the fire engine as they covered him with a sheet.

Buck could see the fire simmering in his eyes even though his face remained passive and blank on the ride back. Closing his eyes as he once again realized how much he missed Eddie’s smell. The smell of comfort, safety. Home.

As soon as they were back at the house, while the fire engine was backing into its spot, Eddie was opening the door and jumping out. As soon as the engine was cut Bobby followed calling after him.

Eddie kept ignoring him, pacing.

Taking a leap of faith and frankly tired of this shit, Buck walked up to him. Placing his hand on Eddie’s shoulder before the words are you okay could leave Buck’s mouth he found himself with a right hook square to the jaw. Fists flying at his face, chest, stomach as echoes of Bobby’s, Hen’s and Chimney’s shouts can be heard along with the sound of pounding footsteps and flesh.

Buck didn’t deflect one shot. All it took was one look into Eddie’s eyes. The emotionless dead eyes of the rage infected street fighter.

“It’s okay.” Buck kept saying as punches were landed. “It’s okay” as hands wrapped around his throat. “Eddie, It’s me, it’s okay” as he found himself flat on his back, slammed to the floor. “I’m me, it’s okay” Eddie straddling him after pushing Bobby off his back trying to get him off Buck.

“Eddie, it’s okay. It’s me. It’s Buck. It’s okay.”

He could hear Bobby yelling Eddie’s name.

“Eddie, it’s okay. It’s me. I love you. It’s okay.”

Suddenly, the punches stopped and a loud sob was heard. Buck picked his bloody body up from the floor, shaking his head no at Bobby and his team.

Kneeling in front of Eddie he caressed his cheek with the palm of his hand.

“It’s okay, baby. Let it out.” Bloody tears from the cuts on his face streamed down his own cheeks as he wrapped Eddie in his arms, lightly kissing his lips. “It’s okay. I’m here. I love you. I’m here. It’s okay.”

“No! You left me!” Eddie sobbed, burying his face into Bucks chest, wrapping his own arms around him.

“I’m here now.”

“Buck.”

“Not now Bobby.”

“We need to get you checked out and Eddie…”

“Eddie, needs help and you need to write me up.”

“Buck….” Bobby had his stern Captain voice starting. Hen and Chimney hung back, unsure of what to do.

“I fell disobeying a direct order from you.” Buck sat rocking Eddie, stroking his back. With a kiss to the top of his head he looked directly at Bobby, telling him he’d get the full story later with his eyes. “Eddie needs us and this time we’re doing it the right way, as a family.”

Nodding his head, Bobby gently placed his hand on Buck’s shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly before standing. “I’ll get a non-department trauma therapist on the phone. At least let Hen look at you, please. There’s a lot of blood and your head is still bleeding.” A sigh. “I thought it was you being impulsive in the field I had to worry about.” “Eddie needs looked at, too.” Taking a bloody hand in his, Buck brought it up to his lips kissing it.

“It’s okay. I love you. I’m here and I’m never leaving you again.”

Hen sat beside Buck, giving him a small smile as she gently patted at the cuts on his face. Placing a pressure bandage on his forehead.

Chimney sat quietly, glancing at Buck every now and then as he cleaned Eddie’s hands, his head rested against Buck’s chest.

Buck let out an accidental hiss and Eddie whimpered, burying his face back into Buck as Hen hit a particularly open wound.

The wounds were raw and deep but they would heal. It may be slow and take time.

But they would heal the right way.

This time Buck would make sure of it.

#make buddie happen #buddie #911 on fox #911fox #fox 911 #911 spoilers #9 1 1 #evan buckley #eddie diaz #eddie x buck #buck x eddie

[tf2monsterau]

Wholesome spy dad but monsters? HmmmmMMMMM?

Ask and you shall receive! Also this is going to be done in writing so...... hope you don't mind! And I hope you like it.

_________

Fatherhood, it wasn't something he expected, nor was it something he asked for, but here he was, checking up on his only son.

Scout had been sleeping in the bathroom ever since it had began snowing. He claimed and insisted that it was completely fine for him to sleep outside in the lake, but that was before Spy had found him face first, in the snow, during a blizzard, trying to find some warmth, right outside the door. Ever since, he's been sleeping in the nice warm bath water of the RED base and was NOT allowed to go outside or work. As a result of his stubbornness, the Merman now had the flu.

He remembered how the events had went clearly.

Spy knew his kid almost as good as his mother and brothers, so he expected him to change his mind last minute.

How he WISHED he would have.

He had no prior knowledge of the blizzard, none of them did. So Spy ended up panicking when the winds picked up. He'd realised his son was outside.

The Cecelia rushed to grab his jacket and his boots, filing the door open to find Scout before the weather got worse.

He didn't travel far. Just a few feet before he saw his child passed out and as pale as the snow, in barely anything but the bandages around his arms, a pair of earmuffs, and a scarf.

This terrified Spy.

He put his hand under his son's chin and the other on one of his gills. Thankfully he was breathing, and his gills were opening and closing. But It was slow. It was very slow.

Spy slowly picked Scout up in his arms and wrapped him in his jacket, hoping it would protect him from the biting cold. He wasn't about to loose his kid. He held him tightly, as if he would fly away if he let go. Then began heading back to the base.

His fins on his ears were cold to the touch, and his scales were frozen, making his usually fluid movement difficult. His dorsal and tail fin were completely frozen, the water having helped freeze it.

Spy quietly opened the door, Scout's head now resting on his shoulder, and was using Spy's jacket as a blanket. But that was instantly put up, as were Scout's earmuffs and scarf, as both were covered in snow.

"Bloody hell. Is the boy alright?" Engineer asked as he tried to light a fire. This caused Pyro to look at their friend in shock, they were watching Engie try to light it.

Spy nodded "He's breathing, but he's as cold as ice." As pure parental instinct kicked in, he held his boy tighter. "I'm going to go put him in the tub, I need you and Pyro to light the fire. "

"Well, I'm trying to light it, but this goddamn spell won't work." Engineer huffed as he held up the spell book. Spy pointed at the line of text, making the Texan realise he was reading the wrong spell. "Oh." He muttered, causing Pyro to laugh.

Spy rolled his eyes and carried Scout into the bathroom and placed him in the tub, then turned on the tap and slowly let the tub fill with warm water. The water from the tap instantly hit Scout's face and he woke up with a start, his forehead hitting the tap as he got up "FUCK!"

"Profanity."

"FUCK YOUR PROFANITY, THIS SHIT HURTS!" Scout shouted to Spy as he moved away from the tap and leaned against the side of the tub. Once the pain went away, he looked at his surroundings "What- how did I-?"

"I carried you." Spy huffed, he crossed his legs and was about to reach for his cigarettes when he remembered 'SHIT my kid has asthma.' and favored putting his hand in his pocket instead.

The two were in an awkward silence for a bit before Scout silently said "Thanks, you know, you didn't have to."

Spy raised an eyebrow "I didn't have to what? Make sure you didn't freeze to death?"

Scout rolled his eyes "Yeah, what ever."

"Scout, you're my child, I'm not going to let you freeze out there. You'd be free to sleep out there ANNNNY time during the Spring, Summer, or Fall, but not during Winter." Spy said sternly "You could have died."

"I would've respawned!"

"Respawn's off."

"Oh. Well shit."

The French Father couldn't help but sigh, he put his hand on Scout's and gave it a squeeze, just like what his mother use to do when he was a child. Scout's hand was cold and smooth, unlike his which was the opposite "Look, my point is, you need to stop getting yourself in potentially dangerous situations, you shouldn't have left the pond."

"It was freezing over!"

"I would have asked somebody to get you out."

"Well the water was... cold."

"That's not true, water's always warm during winter."

Scout was out of options... and excuses, truth was, he didn't want to be alone. But he certainly wasn't going to tell Spy that.

He didn't have to, Spy could see it in the look on his face. He got down on one knee and gave his son a nice warm hug. This had taken Scout aback, but he hugged back, he never knew what it was previously like to have a father, but now he knew what fatherly affection was like. Then he sneezed.

"Did you just sneeze on me?"

"Uhhhhhhhhh.... nooooooooooooooo......?"

Spy let go of Scout and felt his forehead, he was burning up. Great, he was sick, they'd probably have to ask BLU Scout if he could fill in for his older brother. "It seems like you have a fever."

"No I don't" Scout sniffed

"Yes you do."

"No I don't"

"Scout I'm not playing this game."

"What game?"

Spy face palmed and looked at his child through his fingers. "Look, my point is, you're sick and you need to rest." With that, Spy turned off the faucet.

"Spy, I'm fine really, I'm-" Scout's sentence ended quickly when he sneezed multiple times in a row. "I'm sick."

Spy gave him a sympathetic look and stood up, then ruffled Scout's hair. "Well, either way, you should rest up."

Scout groaned and slid under the surface as Spy was heading towards the door.

Spy shut off the bathroom lights.

Before he left, Scout popped up out of the water and said "Hey, thanks for bringin' me in..."

Then, Spy finally smiled "It's my job to make sure you're ok. Now go to sleep"

"Ugh, fiiiine..." Scout yawned then sank his head back underwater "G'night Dad."

Spy turned around to look at Scout, then smiled to himself "Sleep well Jeremy..."

Then he went through the door and let the Merman rest.

__________________

And there you go. Some Monster Spy dad. Sorry it was kinda short but I hope you liked it!

#tf2 #monster au #MonsterFortress2 #dad!spy #merscout #tentaspy #story #welp Scout's sick now. #oof on him #don't go out during snowstorms kids

[phobiadeficient]

all of your works are sooo good. thanks for consider: sniper is distracted with some on-going shit and not paying enough attention to scout, so our lanky runner starts to tease him during battle. then gets shoved into the mattress becouse of doing so, obviously -🦂

i honestly could’ve run with this a while longer but already this is 3,000 words and i feel like that was a nice, organic place to end it. scout is a needy, attention-loving sonofabitch, but i feel like he doesn’t understand how patient sniper is. that’s on him, though

-

“Hey, Snipes.”

He looked over his shoulder as Scout clambered the remainder of the way into the watchtower, the task clearly taking very little effort from him. Scout was out of much of his work uniform, hands bare and headset missing. The rest of his clothes were as usual, albiet somewhat ruffled from climbing a ladder. “I’m working, Scout. Leave me be,” was all he said.

“Aw, c’mon,” Scout complained, fixing his shirt and giving Sniper puppy-dog eyes.

Sniper sighed. “Alright, fine, then get over here,” he said, leaning a short distance to pick up his knife.

Scout’s expression fell. “Woah, what? Why?” he asked, eyeing the weapon.

“So I can Spycheck you. C’mere,” he said, gesturing him over with his blade.

Scout did so warily. Sniper held his free hand out as if for a handshake, and Scout took it slowly. Sniper moved to shift his grip on the knife, reaching forward and pinching him on the arm, hard.

“Ow,” Scout said, a little grumpy, flinching.

Sniper nodded, satisfied, moving to take his seat again. “What did you want?” he asked, picking back up his rifle and trying to find the position he’d been in previously.

“Well,” Scout said, hesitated for a second. “I’m fuckin’ bored, first off.”

“Now’s not a good time,” Sniper replied. “I’m on shift here until the middle of the night. Meant to watch this road and make sure nobody gets anywhere near our base.”

“Why?”

“Local authorities might be onto us. If they find the base, that’s game over. Anyone comes by, I’m meant to take them out. It’s important. So,” he shrugged, “not a good time. Run along now.”

Scout sighed, sidling up behind Sniper and draping arms around his shoulder. His hat was knocked into his eyes, and he straightened it, scowling. “You haven’t paid any attention to me in ages, he complained.

“We hung around each other this past weekend,” Sniper corrected him, eye still firmly down his scope.

“That was with the other guys around. I meant attention attention,” Scout specified, lips finding the back of his neck to punctuate his sentence.

“Not even a full week and a half counts as ages to you, then, does it?” he asked, tone dry.

“Yeah!”

“Thought I left a pretty lasting impression last time. You sure complained enough about it,” Sniper muttered, remembering how much Scout had whined about soreness until the next time he fell under the beam of the Medigun.

“Well, now I’m back for more,” Scout said simply, kissing him a few more times. When Sniper didn’t react in the slightest, Sniper could feel him start pouting. “C’mon, Snipes. You’re really gonna leave me hangin’?”

“Yeah. I have a job to do,” Sniper agreed, not hesitating for even a moment.

“Aw, c’mon. I promise I’ll make it worth your while,” Scout goaded, one hand dropping to slide up Sniper’s thigh, finding and cupping the front of his pants.

All he got was a small jolt in the muscles of Sniper’s back. “I said no,” he replied pointedly.

Scout pouted further, moving his hand away again. “You serious?” he whined.

“Yes. Go have a wank over it, mate. Let me work,” Sniper said.

Scout paused for a few long moments. “Fine,” he replied, starting to sound a little annoyed now, and Sniper’s eyebrows furrowed as he heard the sound of a zipper directly behind him, then shot up as a series of different sounds followed.

Scout kept one arm draped around him, using it to keep his balance as he started pushing down his pants, presumably to hand around his knees since Sniper didn’t hear the belt hitting the floor. Scout raised his free hand up to his own face, spitting into his palm, the noise loud so close to Sniper’s ear and just barely visible in his periphery, and then it was gone, and he heard a series of slick sounds along side a shaky exhale from Scout.

He kept his eyes forward, watching the road.

Scout’s breath was damp and warm against his ear, only getting warmer. Soon enough he shifted a slight bit closer, nosing into Sniper’s hair as his breathing picked up, catching on an exhale, a hard swallow, catching again.

“Fuck, Snipes,” Scout breathed, tone an echo of the whine from earlier, but completely different in a new context. Sniper kept staring straight ahead. “God, fuck.”

Similar sounds and noises followed shortly after, his breath hitching on quiet, barely-there moans. Apparently, Scout was a bit quieter when he was jacking off than when he was getting fucked. Sniper blinked once, hard, clenching his eyelids with force, and went back to staring out of his scope. He shook off the thought with a great deal of effort, shutting down the mental image of Scout lying alone in his bed, panting and moaning softly. It was made harder by the fact that those sounds also existed in real life.

“God, Snipes, I want you to fuck me,” Scout moaned, lips moving against the space just behind his ear, and Sniper had to blink hard again. “Ain’t anyone on the planet who can fuck me up like you can. You always just wreck me, I can barely even walk after, but it’s so good. Can’t stop thinkin’ about it.”

Scout took a brief moment to latch his lips onto Sniper’s neck, just barely scraping over the skin with those big teeth of his, before he had to pull back again to breathe.

“Fuck,” he panted, voice broken. “I just want your dick real bad, babe. Up my ass, in my throat, it doesn’t matter. Anything. I just fuckin’ want you.”

Sniper swallowed hard, feeling very much overheated in all of his layers. He was sweating. But he was pretty sure Scout wouldn’t notice—he felt Scout’s cheek against him, and it was damp too.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” Scout breathed, unsteady, leaning hard now. “It’s fuckin’ killin’ me. Fuck, please, fuck—“

“If you get cum on my back, I’m throwing you off this tower, teammate or not,” Sniper warned lowly, having heard that particular voice crack before and knowing what it meant.

Scout gave a desperate whine against the space under his ear, but his weight shifted slightly nevertheless. He made a choked-off noise, quickly biting down on the collar of Sniper’s vest, keening into it softly. He heard the sound of a drip behind him, liquid hitting the floorboards. Scout breathed heavily through his nose for a few moments, then finally detached, panting hard. He laid a few more kisses against Sniper’s neck, humming and contented.

Except not too contented, apparently, because he spoke once he had his breath back a bit. “You know I’m good for more than one round, you want in on the second one?” he asked suggestively, his grin in his voice and against Sniper’s skin in equal measure.

“No,” Sniper said calmly. “If you’re done here, run along. You’re heavy.”

Scout straightened up, scoffing, all of that irritation coming back all at once. “You fuckin’ serious right now?!” he demanded. “All that, and you’d still rather sit here and stare down a scope—“

“And do my job, which is what I’m here for, and getting paid to do, yes,” Sniper replied easily. “And I’m here for the rest of the night, so you’d best just get a move on.”

Scout made an annoyed noise, and Sniper heard him shuffling his clothes back into place, no small amount of roughness involved by the sound of it. “Fuck you, Snipes,” he all but spat.

Sniper hadn’t previously known that it was possible to stomp down a ladder. Apparently it was.

-

In the middle of battle, arms around his shoulders again.

He jumped, but managed to keep from lashing out just barely, and he promptly recognized who it must be and reasoned that the enemy Spy would’ve just stabbed him between the shoulder blades and wouldn’t be playing a dumb game like this. “Bad time, Scout,” was all he said, tone clipped.

“Nah,” Scout said, “match is almost over.” Then he promptly put his mouth on Sniper’s neck again, exactly the same way he had last time.

“Mate, besides the fact that I’m working, anyone could come up here and see this,” Sniper said, tone even more clipped.

“Nobody ever comes up here,” Scout scoffed, breath hot against his earlobe, which he promptly nipped at.

“Enemy Spook does,” Sniper said sharply, and a moment later he fired his gun, the kickback shifting Scout away from him for a second.

“And he’s pissed off at Engie today,” Scout replied, reaching up to tap at his own headset. “Nobody’s gonna come up here. Seriously.”

“You don’t know that for sure.” Another fire. “You can sit yourself down again and have a wank, I don’t give a damn. But you already know that trick won’t work on me, and if you get caught with your cock out that’s nobody’s fault but your own.”

“Yeah,” Scout agreed, much too smug. “I know all that.”

The sound of a zipper again. Sniper scowled. “You’re wasting your time.”

“Maybe,” Scout shrugged, and moved around Sniper, and within a moment he was under the window Sniper was sat in front of, knelt down between Sniper’s legs. Sniper kept a warning on the tip of his tongue, waiting for Scout to try reaching for his zipper, but Scout didn’t, just worming his own pants and underwear down his legs. The sound of something clicking open, then something squirting lewdly, then further slick noises following just behind as Scout started jerking off.

“Tug off all you want, all you’re doing is giving the other team time to kick our arses,” Sniper drawled. “Won’t make much difference to me.”

“Yeah, clearly you don’t care if I jack off,” Scout said, voice only a touch breathier.

Sniper frowned at how oddly that was phrased, then his eyes widened as the sound of Scout jacking off slowed, a different slick noise starting up in its absence.

“Mmh,” Scout hummed, leaning his cheek on Sniper’s thigh, and Sniper only ever heard Scout make that exact noise in one situation, and he swallowed hard.

It had occurred to him previously that Scout rarely needed the amount of prep that he thought he would before getting absolutely railed. Only now did it occur to him why that might be.

Scout teased himself open with soft noises against Sniper’s inseam, jerking in steady motions to stay comfortable.

Scout had a really high sex drive, Sniper was aware. He probably got himself off practically on the daily.

Scout moaned, and it sounded an awful lot like his name, and Sniper had to swallow hard. He did so again a second later at Scout’s soft, barely-there pleading. “Fuck, harder, Snipes, harder,” he gasped, unsteady and desperate, and it made Sniper’s pulse stutter in sympathy.

How often did he finger himself open? How often did he do this, fucking himself and moaning Sniper’s name? Did he have toys, whole fantasies?

His hands shook enough that when he took a shot a moment later, it collided with the target’s neck, not the forehead. And from the spray it created it would make no difference, they’d die in a few seconds anyways, but it was sloppy. Very sloppy. The gunshot made Scout jump slightly, gasp into the fabric of his pants, leaving them warm and just slightly damp, but he didn’t slow his motions in the slightest.

Sniper was getting hard. Of course he was getting hard, how on earth wouldn’t he be getting hard? And any moment Scout would notice, and would taunt him, double down, start begging to be fucked, and that might very well be enough to snap Sniper’s self-control.

He put the rifle down.

Scout looked up at him through his eyelashes, flushed and with parted lips, and Sniper seized him by the front of his shirt, hauling him to his feet.

Two damp hands at his wrist, Scout gasping as he was hauled across the small room to a few crates serving as a table and promptly shoved down onto them. Affirmations fell from his lips as Sniper leaned down to kiss and bite at his neck, hard, hard enough that it would certainly be leaving a mark, and only sped up when Sniper took his wrists and pinned them up above his head on the table, blindly scrabbling for the rope he had left there.

Within a few moments he had a Scout tied there, grinning and panting and hard and with rumpled, mostly-open clothing, staring up at him triumphantly. “Gonna fuck me, Snipes?” he asked, very taunting, very proud of himself.

Sniper grabbed him by the chin, tilting his head to one side so he could press a kiss to his cheek, nip his earlobe, and speak into his ear. “No, I’m not,” he replied simply, and straightened his hat, and walked back to his window to sit right back down and pick up his rifle.

Scout yelled at him for about five minutes. Sassed him for about three more. Sulked for two, started asking nicely to be untied, and begged with increasing desperation for about twenty minutes after that before he apparently realized that Sniper wasn’t going to let him out any time soon.

He asked, very quietly and sheepishly after a few minutes of silence, if Sniper could at least hide him better. Sniper picked up the blanket he’d been sitting on for comfort and tossed it over Scout. That got him yelled at for about two minutes before Scout went quiet again when Sniper pointed out that the blanket wasn’t as good at hiding him if he was making noise.

The match ended an hour and a half later, and they won, albeit barely, largely carried by Heavy and Medic’s extraordinary teamwork and good build placements by the Engineer. Sniper packed up everything he had, emptying jars and his long-cold cup of coffee out the window when he was sure his teammates weren’t beneath it. He then sat and waited a few minutes for the hooting and hollering to fade before he walked over and tugged the blanket off of Scout’s face.

Scout was pouting at him. “Can you please untie me now?” he asked, voice quiet and a little pitiful. Sniper almost felt bad. Almost.

“That depends. Everyone on the team gone off the field?” he asked, tapping at Scout’s headset.

“Yeah. They started askin’ where I was. They think it’s another situation like that time Spy’s head got chopped off and the other Medic kept him for a week or two,” he replied, thoroughly subdued.

“What’s got you in such a mood?” Sniper asked, tone joking, pinching his cheek.

“You fuckin’ tied me up and left me here under a blanket for like two hours,” Scout replied, tone containing a very minimal amount of sharpness.

“Would’ve let you up if you said the safeword,” Sniper replied, eyebrow ticking up.

Scout looked away from him. “Wasn’t sure that you would,” he said quietly. “And it would’ve freaked me out even more if I did and you wouldn’t.”

Sniper’s expression fell in an instant. “Scout, of course I would’ve. Why do you think that I wouldn’t?” he asked, very serious.

“Because…” Scout trailed, stopped for a few seconds. When he spoke again, his voice was even quieter. “Because you keep ignoring me. Don’t you want me?”

Sniper was incredulous. “Mate, of bloody course I want you. You wouldn’t believe how hot and bothered I’ve been. But I need to put my job first, and so do you. If it’s that big a deal, we can try and meet up more off the clock. I can try and make more time. But I’m not going to stop doing my job just to get off, awright?”

Scout nodded, apparently slightly pacified.

“What do you want now?” Sniper asked.

“I want you to fuck me, I think I made that pretty fuckin’ clear,” Scout snapped. “And my shoulders are startin’ to hurt. Could you—?”

Sniper was already up untying him before he could even finish asking. He moved Scout’s arms down to his sides, kneading at his shoulders in strong hands. “That feel better?” he asked gently.

“Yeah.” Scout got up, shifted uncomfortably for a few seconds, fixed his clothes, wincing. “Jesus.”

“Sorry, mate,” Sniper said, the guilt starting to set in.

“Whatever, man,” Scout said. Once he was all situated, he looked up at Sniper, eyes narrowed. “So you… do still want me?” he asked, a little hesitant.

“Yeah,” Sniper agreed.

“You free?” was his next question, hopeful.

“I’ve got chores that need doing, but they can wait,” Sniper replied easily.

“My place or yours?”

“Mine,” Sniper replied, tugging Scout the few steps in to close the distance between them. “Your walls are thin. And after two displays like that, you’re gonna let the whole base know who you belong to if we’re in your room.”

Scout shivered, melting against him. “Fuckin’ please,” he all but groaned.

Sniper nosed in at his neck, teeth dragging lightly across his skin in a way that made Scout gasp. He was clearly all keyed up, and Sniper grinned at it. “First, I might just sit you down and watch you for a while, though. See how you get yourself off. Didn’t exactly get a good look, and you sounded—“ A pause to nip at him, and Scout made another desperate little noise, hips jerking forward into his thigh. “—bloody gorgeous.”

“Anything,” Scout agreed too-fast, panting against him, starting to roll his hips forward.

Sniper grinned again, pulling back to look Scout in the eye, tilting his chin up with one hand. “Oh, darl, you’re gonna wish you didn’t say that.”

#//sniperscout #//powerplay #//bondage

[mikiruma]

im gonna talk abt tf2 and pokemon again bc i can.

scout of course would dig fast pokémon!!! he's probably got a jolteon he loves dearly, maybe even a crobat he was given (as a zubat) in childhood. from who? eyes emoji there are faster pokémon, sure, but a lot are legendaries or bugs- and he's still trying to warm up to bugs. when/if he did, you KNOW he'd be all over ninjask or accelgor. he usually fawns over pokémon he thinks would make him look cool or fit his fight style (ie hit ur opponents the hardest first & dont get touched) but has a weak spot for some of the "cuter" ones. probably tried to lick a vanillish. as staunch a believer i am he'd be from castelia city, i like the idea that he used to be a rocket grunt, or someone who wanted to join team rocket at one point. i was trying to decide if he'd have a type preference but i like to think he's a mixed bag, mostly because every pokémon is cool and exciting to him! if you did ask & he did have to pick, it'd definitely be electric. wait, dragon, obviously... nah, fighting is good. no wa

soldier's partner is obvious! zigzagoon! mostly bc its a raccoon-like lil dude... he probably gives nicknames to every pokémon he sees, not necessarily just the ones he tries to catch. because lets face it, his zigzagoon is the ONLY pokémon that matters to him. well, that and any that catches zhanna's eye. his zigzagoon carries an everstone and is probably stupid high levelled but nobody really keeps track. soldier does initiate a lot of battles, but they're more fun when zhanna's with him too! theyre an inseperable group who probably wreak enough havoc to be considered their own team of hooligans, but who's to stop a happy couple with their adorable op pokémon? also i kinda wrote all that down super quick buuuut zigzagoon also works as a support pokémon for him when his stability gets extra rough, laying on his lap and helping to keep him grounded. he doesnt have any desire to keep more pokémon since he's fine with just 1, but if he had more i think he might get along with loudred or chatot. (chatot would DEFINITELY take some warming up to on his end but i LOVE THE THOUGHT)

pyro loves fire types of course!!! theyre probably the only one brave enough to pet their hotter ones. engineer probably made em special gloves just so they could play with their slugma... its hard to pick favorites, but the ones theyre closest to are slugma and monferno. they also have a solosis who just loves to play! unlike other people who usually just have one pokémon walking with em at all times, pyro tends to keep all three of theirs out of their pokéballs. they worry about them getting cramped or bored, and while its good exercise, sometimes its difficult to wrangle them when solosis has someones hat and slugmas melting through the furniture and monferno found spy's disguise kit.. theyre a big happy family though!! i think pyro would also like fairy types a lot, but if they got a fourth pokémon, theyd probably keep it at a daycare for the sake of themselves and the rest of the team. just in case, they might really want a sylveon or snubbull.

demoman and any pokémon knowing any explosive moves is an obvious fit! i initially liked him and electrode for this, but since part of their biology is exploding unpredictably... maybe that ones saved for battling. or at least not kept at any of the bases. i like the idea of him keeping his battle partners & normal team separate. when he's not drunk, he's a very skilled trainer and actually took a handful of gym challenges when he was younger. of course it started getting tough to balance work and training, but he never intended to get far in gyms anyway- to him it was just a fun challenge where he got to bond with his pokémon. other than his electrode, he's probably also got a charmeleon (whos either causing mischief with pyro's monferno or keeping demo company while he works/naps) and a honedge (who he will spar with sometimes). he used to have several other pokémon, but he eventually didn't like keeping them all abandoned in pc boxes, and ended up rehoming a lot of them. scout probably has a meowth from him, but he wont tell you.

heavy never cared too much about setting up huge teams or amassing a large collection. he never carries pokéballs, but his party is made up of some impressive pokémon. unlike most of the team who catch their pokémon through normal means (trade/gift, fishing, etc), he befriended his naturally. its easy to say one is ursaring, so of course im going to say it. he wont share how they met, but i wanna say he found its egg abandoned and raised it from there. they probably wrestle a lot but theyre always careful not to seriously injure each other. he befriended his mamoswine (then swinub) shortly after, then his abomasnow much later, in between him busting his family out of the gulag & leaving to find work. he left all three in siberia in the care of his family, but has a teddiursa from his ursaring to think of them all by. probably spoils the crap out of em all every chance he gets though, he loves his pokémon as much as his human family and saves recipes for poképuffs & poffins.

engineer wasn't always on board w the idea of a partner pokémon, mainly because he was always into engineering and was sure he'd be too caught up in it to focus on.. well, anything else. sure, when he was younger, he was like most kids and dreamt of being a league champion, but it always seemed to fall through.. until he discovered steel types. he started his journey later than most, but more than anything he's thankful because they help immensely with his work and lighten the load. he has a magneton who.. isn't that bright, but he's cute and thats what matters. he's also got a rotom who occasionally helps experiment with new machines, but mostly just possesses dispensers and rubs itself on everyone and everything. yum, static cling! engie didn't get into battling as much as he thought he would, but he's essentially working his dream job with his best friends (and 8 other dorks) so things are pretty good. this doesnt mean he wont go for human help when hes stumped or burnt out, though! other partner thoughts i had were torkoal, raichu and porygon2.

sniper is probably the biggest pokémon expert out of everyone on the team (well, aside from medic probably.) he's basically a walking pokédex and can tell you all about type matchups. he's also way closer to his pokémon than people realize, and especially closer than any real people. this is especially noticeable with his baby kangaskhan- although with a heavier origin than simply "abandoned", he ended up bonding with heavy over the ordeal. even with more technical aspects memorized, raising this baby was a completely new venture- not one he hated though! he also collects bug pokémon (that he lets scout get close to,when he tries to get over his fear) & has a slakoth that just kinda.. fell asleep on him one time and just never went away. other choices include koamala or krokorok.

medic is like a pokémon professor but fucked up. while he was primarily a human doctor, after losing his medical license, he started to dedicate time to studying pokémon. he doesnt run inhumane experiments on them because i said so. he's working on filling up his pokédex more than anything, and loves listening to others talk about their partners or other species theyve seen. he has his own pokémon too of course! as the team healer its only natural he has healing pokémon like audino and blissey, but he has a soft spot for flying types, specifically the birds. he has way too many pidove. he probably has a massive aviary separate from his medical lab where he keeps more birds, namely pidgeotto, fearow and some starly. he used to travel a lot (especially after being chased out of his hometown), but he saw it as more chances to discover new pokémon. probably has a very illegal form of the pokémon boxes with no storage limit. also probably heard the stories about mew and mewtwo and actually got inspired. probably owns the most pokémon merc, specifically stationery- hey, if ur getting some unethical experiment performed on you by the german guy you tried to rob earlier that night, are you going to pay more attention to his shit eating smirk or his cool ass holographic pikachu pencils??? or perhaps the cutesy eeveelutions stickers on the back of his clipboard???? thats what i thought.

spy looks like the guy who would probably be the least into pokémon, but that couldn't be further from the truth. he's not as wild as scout or medic by any means, but back in his day he was "pretty decent" (a gym leader.) i like the idea of zoroark being his partner, but you know who else is cool??? cofagrigus. gengar. banette. probably the only one on the team to actually get into mega evolving. and the only one with a shiny, but its gengar so we dont talk about that. i wont imply he loves his pokémon over his own family, he's just had a lot on his plate. remember scouts crobat? while hes got a more methodical approach to battling, he doesnt do it nearly as often as he used to. he still keeps his gym team, and though they tend to be more serious than the other pokémon in the base, they do on occasion get into trouble with others, namely pyro's solosis and scout's jolteon. not misbehaving on purpose, just being curious :0 probably uses luxury balls to catch all his pokémon and has an unused love ball with scouts moms name engraved on the bottom. (either for the novelty, or maybe hes trying to find the right one to catch for her??)

#talking #tf2 #pokémon #long post - #< I MEAN IT #might add a readmore later #im super tired and on mobile #if u even read this far i love you thank u for listening to me autismdump #yes i changed canon to fit this yes i also cant remember all of canon rn #alcohol ment - #update added a readmore AND demo honedge real