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nkplanet · 5 months

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WHICH TROPE ARE YOU?

PAIRING: enhypen x gn!reader SUMMARY: what trope do you and the enhypen members share? WARNINGS: a smidge of angst in jungwon + heeseung’s, all set in high school apart from jay + heeseung’s, implied toxic parents in jungwon’s, written on my phone so the formatting might be weird

NOTE: thank u sm for all the love on my last post and 155 followers!! i rlly appreciate you guys 🫶🫶 also i’m definitely gonna rewrite some of these as actual fics bc i love them (looking at u jungwon and niki)

— HEESEUNG 희승 — second chance romance personally i’m not a big fan of this trope but it just fits heeseung so well like ??? hello yes i would give u a second chance. there’s no doubt in my mind that cheating would not be involved, instead it was something that happened when you two were young and immature, but when you meet again you’ve grown and can continue to do so together

it had ended awfully the first time. neither of you were particularly mature, and a heated argument had caused your entire relationship had come crashing down. sixteen year old you would always regret the way you gave heeseung the cold shoulder for a reason you couldn’t even remember, and the way you had both yelled and screamed at each other. you hadn’t spoken for years when, all of a sudden, you bumped into him in a cafe. then at work. in the park. after six years of no contact, he was everywhere. it was like the universe was telling you to give him another chance. eventually, your walls crumbled, and heeseung made his way back into your heart. the two of you had never been happier.

others under the cut!

— JAY 제이 — fake dating jay is perfect for this trope imo, especially when it comes to fake dating at a wedding. put me in a psych ward bc whenever i think abt him in a suit i go insane. also your whole family would love him because he’s such a gentleman. he’s so perfect

it was your aunts wedding, and all of your siblings were bringing their significant others as plus ones. your brother had joked about how you’d be the only single one in the wedding party and, rather than face the humiliation, you lied and told him you did in fact have a boyfriend. it was a lie you forgot about until two weeks before the wedding, when your aunt mentioned being excited to meet the mysterious man. you panicked, running to tell jay about your issue. while you were contemplating telling your family that the mysterious man had broken up with you, jay said “why don’t i pretend to be your boyfriend? just for the day?” except, his fake boyfriend touches didn’t feel very fake. your aunt remarked that the two of you reminded her of herself and your new uncle when they were young. by the end of the night, you and jay were sharing kisses outside the reception. yeah, fake boyfriend my ass.

— JAKE 제이크 — you fell first, he fell harder jake seems like such a loser (affectionately) that he’d be the one to fall first, but just imagine that he doesn’t realise his feelings are romantic. he just thinks everyone sees their best friends that way and when he finds out otherwise? oh he’s head over heels in love with you. such a loser. i love him

the way you and jake interact is far from platonic. you had developed a crush on him when you were just fifteen, and since then you'd been trying to drop hints. when he started reciprocating your admittedly flirtatious gestures, you thought you had a chance, but he never made a move. in fact, jake never realised that he shared those feelings until one of his friends pointed out that the two of you were incredibly flirty with each other. he thought everyone saw their best friends as gorgeous, as an angel sent from above, as someone who they'd willingly spend the rest of their life with. after that it was hard for him to see you in any light other than romantic. when you asked him out he practically screamed yes. he is absolutely head over heels in love

— SUNGHOON 성훈 — opposites attract i was gonna pick grumpy x sunshine for him but he’s not exactly grumpy so opposites attract it is!! he’s reserved and only really lets loose around those he considers close, whereas you’re loud and bubbly with lots of friends. one of my fav tropes for a reason

sunghoon’s attention was brought to you via your laughter. it was loud and bright, and he’d never heard anything like it. since then, he’d yearned for the sound. though he lacked the confidence to actually ask you out, he began seeking your company. he’d study with you in the library, would offer to walk you home. things that friends do. you, on the other hand, were absolutely smitten. sunghoon was quiet and a little mysterious. you could never read him, and yet you were absolutely entranced by him. you thought he was absolutely gorgeous, perhaps one of the most handsome men you’d ever seen. one day, while sunghoon was walking you home in the rain, you’d stopped and turned to face him. “what are we?” you’d asked. sunghoon remembers blanking immediately, not knowing how to reply. instead of words, he answered you with a kiss.

— SUNOO 선우 — best friend’s brother okay but imagine: you go over to ur best friends house and end up gossiping with their brother and all of a sudden,, he’s soooo attractive? and then he starts developing this crush but he can’t date you because you’re his siblings best friend. there’s probably be some secret dating involved (which i’m also a sucker for tbh)

you'd been harbouring a crush on sunoo for a while now, never acting on it because he was your best friend's brother. you looked forward to the weekly gossip sessions that the two of you shared when your friend left you together arguably more than you looked forward to seeing your friend (but don't tell her that). little did you know, sunoo felt the same. fleeting glances and not-so-platonic touches began growing between you two. eventually, sunoo asked you out. you wanted to say yes so badly but couldn't betray your friend like that. instead, you began dating in secret. it was only two months of sneaking around, 'jokingly' flirting, and kissing in places where she wouldn't see before she finally exploded, yelling that you two were gross but had her blessing. going public only increased the pda by tenfold, and people quickly grew sick of your sappy conversations. not that either of you cared, of course.

— JUNGWON 정원 — academic rivals turned lovers [full fic!] ACADEMIC RIVALS TURNED LOVERS!!!!! i love this trope sm and i think it fits won so well. i was gonna originally give this to niki but he wasn’t rlly in school. so. jungwon it is!! i can see you two as the top two in your year and always competing when one day it all comes crashing down for you. jungwon is suddenly? nice? and we go from there 🤭🤭

yang jungwon had never been the nicest person to you. sure, he was never really mean per-se, but the two of you were so competitive that nothing said was particularly nice. you and jungwon seemed to constantly be on par with each other academically, consistently being the top two students in your year. in english and sciences, you usually pulled ahead, while jungwon excelled in maths and other subjects. the rivalry between you was so tense that even the teachers tried to calm it down but to no avail. the reason behind your competitiveness was your parents. the pressure they put on you was immense, and one day you just broke. you’d had a fight with them, and the next day flunked a biology test. your grades began slipping from then on, and jungwon began to take notice. he stopped making quips, instead resorting to leaving some snacks or study tips on your desk when he thought you weren’t looking. he began giving you sympathetic looks until you eventually confronted him, telling him you didn’t want his pity. it wasn’t pity, though, it was worry. your relationship changed after that, no longer rivals but a little more than friends.

— NI-KI 니키 — childhood friends to lovers/first love OKAY HEAR ME OUT. u were childhood friends. niki realises his feelings and he’s all like oh no i can’t feel this way abt my bff :( and tried to pull away from u but ur like ??? yes tf and that’s how u become lovers

niki had been your closest friend for longer than you could remember. in both of your houses there sat baby pictures of the two of you together. you’d grown up together, going to all the same schools and most of the same clubs. in highschool, you were known as inseparable - if someone wanted one of you, they got both. but one day, niki started pulling away. it was fine, you told yourself, he was just growing up. you both were. but when he stopped answering your calls and texts and started actively avoiding you, you were hurt. you’d been by each others sides for so long that you didn’t really know how to live without him. the truth was, he’d discovered feelings that he’d never felt about anyone before. he knew he shouldn’t feel like this about his best friend, but he couldn’t help it. he was miserable without you, so much so that his friends were telling him to just ask you out. they told him that you definitely felt the same, so he took the leap. and thank god he did. you’re his first love, his everything.

#nkplanet 🪐#nkplanet’s fics 🪐#enhypen #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen fluff #enhypen comfort #heeseung x reader #jay x reader #jake x reader #sim jake x reader #sunghoon x reader #sunoo x reader #jungwon x reader #ni ki x reader

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ickadori · 6 months

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++ 𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐊𝐈

[summary] kisaki meets someone a bit more organically than he had intended to.

[cws] fem reader -> reader is a mother (the son is named ‘ren’). mentions of an abusive relationship. abuse towards reader. mild violence. allusions to cannibalism. unedited.

[notes] this was in drafts since sept and i actually hate it now but i didn’t wanna delete bc he’s my first luv ^.^ ending is thrown together heh!

Kisaki believed in meeting people organically — he considered himself a bit of a romantic.

Dating apps weren’t an option for him (even if he wasn’t on every criminal watchlist available he still wouldn’t go that route - it screamed desperation, and he liked to be quiet with his) and he had turned down every offer of being ‘set-up’ on blind dates after he had given Hanma a reluctant ‘yes’ and ended up sat across from a coked up, wannabe model that dropped dead of an overdose before the appetizers even hit the table.

It was a bit hard to meet people naturally when you rarely interacted with the public, and when you did, it was because a few big name heads needed to roll. He couldn’t exactly go out to mingle just after taking a handsaw to a man’s neck—you had to be in the right headspace.

He had looked inward at first, scoured his payroll and checked out each and every name listed there. He would never get involved with anyone working directly under him (work and pleasure should never mix, after all) but extended family members were fair game, or so he had thought, before he had realized just how fucked up the people he had working underneath him was, along with their families. Prostitutes, convicts, plebes riddled in debt and holding cans on street corners to try and afford it, losers spending all their measly paychecks in pachinko parlors and whorehouses.

Kisaki had standards, and they didn’t come close to fitting them.

Back to the drawing board.

A white cloud of air leaves his mouth as he sighs, hands slipping into the pockets of his wool, trench coat as he steps out of the driver's seat of the car. He moves to head into the lobby of his office building, gaze quickly sliding over to the kid standing near the entrance before immediately disregarding him.

“Hello, Sir.” He’s greeted with a deep bow, and a dark brow quirks up as he turns his head to look at the boy. He stops, eyes taking in the way he shivers in the cold from his lack of coat, coupled with the ratty t-shirt, gym shorts and sandals.

“I don’t have any cash on me. I’ll send someone back down with some.” He goes to move around, only for the kid to shuffle in front of him and block his path. Kisaki has half a mind to plant his foot in his stomach, but bites down the urge and instead grips the kid’s shirt and wrangles him off to the side.

“Wait! I-I don’t need your money! I need your help!”

“Do you see a badge on me? Go to the police station.” He chuckles as he says it. He usually tells people not to go to the police station. “I can’t help you.”

“I can pay you.” The kid goes into his pockets and brandishes two fistfuls of coins, and Kisaki takes a good look around the dark, empty streets, trying to catch a glimpse of Hanma because this has to be one of his stupid ideas of a joke. “I need your help, Sir, please. My dad—”

“If a man can’t help himself he’s better off dead.”

“—keeps hurting my mom.”

The coins rattle due to the trembling of the kid’s hands. “What’s your name?”

“Ren.”

“How exactly do you think I could help you and your mother, Ren?”

“Kill him.” Ren looks him in the eyes as he says it, and Kisaki hums. Kids are stupidly brave, he thinks. No older than ten and he goes to elicit the help of a random man that he doesn’t even know—

“Do you know who I am?”

“Yes. I…” Ren looks around, unsure, before he’s squaring his shoulders and meeting his gaze again. “I’ve been stalking you! And I saw you kill people with that really tall man so I know that you do it!”

“You didn’t see me do anything like that so don’t ever say that again. Do you understand?” Kisaki should probably toss the kid over a bridge or something - kids had big mouths, and he didn’t need to be brought down by some hobo child who blabbed his mouth to the cops - but he had always had a soft spot for children.

“Yes, Sir.” Ren’s speech was starting to get hard to decipher, his trembling reaching an all time high as his lips turned blue, and Kisaki sighed as he slipped his arms out of his coat, leaving him in a white button down and suspenders.

“Put this on before you freeze.”

Ren pointedly looks down to the coins in his hands, and Kisaki juts his chin to the side, signaling for him to just toss it down onto the street.

“B-But I saved this for two months for you!”

“Just throw it.”

“But it’s money!”

It’s mostly yen coins mixed in with a few 10 yens, and Kisaki sets his mouth to tell him it’s nearly worthless, nothing worth holding onto, and that he could just barely afford a few lollipops, much less an assassination, but he just sighs out through his nose and lets the kid dump the coins into his hand. He pockets it, trying to remember the last time he’s had loose change in his possession, and hands off the coat to Ren who quickly puts it on. It drapes him like a blanket, the arms too long and the hem of the coat dragging along the ground, and Kisaki sighs again.

“Get in the car so we can get this over with.”

“This is your place?”

“It’s a shithole.”

“It is.” Kisaki agrees as he cuts the engine, eyes taking in the dilapidated apartment building. He’s seen many like it, but this one might just be the worst. A small section of the building looks to be burned, as if a fire started in a unit and took out a few apartments and no one ever bothered to repair it.

There’s loiterers lingering all around; teens looking to get into trouble, or maybe looking to stay out of whatever trouble is in their homes, junkies scratching at themselves as they pace back and forth, and hookers in dark corners with their johns.

“That’s what my mom calls it.” Ren continues. “She says we’re gonna move one day. She’s been working a lot to save up money.”

“Where does she work?”

“She won’t tell me.”

“Stalk her like you did me.”

“But that’s bad.”

“So you can do bad things to me and not her?”

“Well,” he shrugs. “You’re bad.”

“I guess I am.”

Kisaki opens the middle console and bypasses the gun stashed inside, inside pulling free the pair of brass knuckles and slipping them into his back pocket. “Does your father have a gun?”

“No, they’re illegal. The officer at my school says so.” Ren peers into the console and goes wide-eyed at the sight he sees.

“How big is he?”

“Really big—bigger than you.”

“Where does he work?”

“The… um, the lumber yard.”

The aluminum bat that he keeps under his seat is pulled free, and then he’s signaling for Ren to get out of the car as he steps out into the cold himself. They join at the front of the car, and like bees to honey, a few women who look as if they’re standing on their last leg make their way over to him, dollar signs reflecting in their irises as they take in the sports car he’s just gotten out of.

“Which apartment is yours?”

“It’s this way.” Ren sets off in the direction in which he pointed to, and Kisaki holds up a gloved hand to the women steadily approaching, stopping them in their tracks as they huff and send him scathing looks.

They’re heading in the direction of the apartments that had been burned down, and Kisaki considers offing the father and the mother and just dropping the boy off at one of the orphanages that actually give a shit about the kids in their care. Killing the dad would stop the mom from getting her head knocked left and right, but it wouldn’t fix their problems. Few people had what it took to pull themselves out of a hole like this one, and the woman was clearly lacking a few vital things up top to have ended up in this predicament in the first place.

“Goddamn fucking bitch. Where is it?!” The near snarl brings Kisaki out of his thoughts, and he reacts in time to snag ahold of Ren’s shoulder when he tried to dash for the apartment. A heavy smack sounds seconds later, followed by the sound of furniture and glass breaking, and another sigh, this one heavier, leaves him as he leans the bat against the wall and starts rolling up his sleeves.

“What the fuck am I doing here?” He mutters to himself, crisp sleeves rolling back to reveal toned, bronze arms. The muscles in them flex as lithe fingers wrap around the handle of the bat, and he rolls his shoulders once before taking a step back, raising his foot, and slamming it right below the lock.

It’s been a while since he’s done a house call, but he adjusts quickly. He rushes in —best to catch ‘em before the shock of the door bursting in wears off— and lays eyes on two people, a man and a woman. He aims low and hits a knee, and there’s a crunch that makes his eyebrow twitch and a scream that brings forth a wave of amusement.

The man stumbles, face screwed up in pain and spit and curses flying. He’s built like a brick house, and the physique reminds him of a certain taxing restaurant owner, so he swings the bat again, this time cracking a few ribs and sending the man sprawling down to the floor.

A floorboard creaks behind him, and reflexes kick in as he swings before he looks. A soft gasp and a shout of ‘Sir’ makes him stop just in time, and he turns to see he was about 3 centimeters away from caving the woman’s face—oh.

Even with the budding bruises, the haggard clothing, and the teary, snotty face, Kisaki has to blink twice and bite down on his tongue to make sure he hasn’t died and somehow snuck his way into Heaven—disgustingly cheesy, he’s aware, but he’s a romantic, you know, and the sight of you is enough to ignite something inside him that had been extinguished for quite some time.

He takes in a slow breath, and the tepid, stale air of this should-be-condemned apartment feels like a breath of fresh air, and he knows what this feeling is. He had felt it once, back when he was young and full of a puppy love for a woman that could just barely stand the sight of him.

He should leave, go back to his office and send a cleanup crew to get rid of all the loose ends. He had thought he wanted another woman to send him up in a tailspin, but there were too many variables, too many things that he couldn’t control, too many things that he couldn’t predict, and he was starting to run out of people to kamikaze box trucks for him when relationships went awry.

“Mom!” Ren runs to you, and you wrap him up in your arms, eyes warily watching Kisaki as you try and gauge his intentions.

“I-I don’t have what he owes you.” Ah.

“He doesn’t owe me a thing.” He forcefully drags his eyes away from you to instead look at the writhing man on the floor. Kisaki lifts his foot and settles it on his midsection, grinding the heel of his shoe against the protruding bones. “But I’m sure he owes someone, so I’ll settle the debt for them.” He looks back to you, and a clammy hand tightens around the handle of the bat. “Unless you have any objections...”

Your eyes flicker down to your child’s father, eyebrows scrunching together as you hold Ren tighter, and Kisaki pleads in his head for you to give him an answer that’ll snuff that flame you lit right out.

Ask me to spare him. Tell me how he’s not a bad man, even though he beats you black and blue and forces your son to seek the help of random men in the middle of the night. Cry that you love him. Make me hate you—

“Just... just don’t do it here, please. I don’t want him to see.”

“Of course.”

Ah, hell.

Kisaki guesses this is as organic as it’s going to get.

#kisaki x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tr x reader

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swallowedbymadness · 9 months

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❋ need your love ❋

Pairing: jongho x chubby!fem!reader

Genre: your classic summer romance with a sprinkle of soft smut

Summary: you weren’t expecting much when the air got warmer and the days got longer, but you swore the sun shined a little bit brighter the summer you met choi jongho.

Word Count: 3k

A/N: hi, yes, hello! I return with a gift of jongho lovin’ 🥹 bc we could all use some choi jongho in our lives rn after the recent injury announcement, am I right??? 😪 I recommend listening to “Sweetbitter” by RIO while reading. 18+ content, so please, minors DNI. Enjoy! 🤍

Warnings: wholesomely romantic smut, fingering, unprotected sex, cream pie, reader is kind of a hot mess in her feels, but aren’t we all?

Proofread: Kind of? You know the drill. If you see a mistake, no you don’t.

You’ve always hated endings. Nothing good ever came from them. There’s something about the finality of it all that riddled you with anxiety and had your heart hold on for dear life every time. To be fair, you always seemed to be the one who cared a little more than you should. To put it simply, your heart was just too grand for this world, and those who left you knew that. You fell into the same game of chess you found yourself playing time and time again, in and out of relationships, platonic and romantic alike. It was like you were a beacon for those who needed temporary comfort, that looking different to each individual. However, when you no longer benefited them, they left.

You saw the pattern, you really did. But you were too stubborn to admit defeat each time. So, you ignored it all together. You just assumed everyone would be the same, so why try to understand it when you saw the inevitable from miles away anyways? It was unavoidable, and you certainly were not one to go up against something as monstrous as change. So, you made peace with the thought of short and sweet relationships, learning not to attach yourself to anyone anymore. You wouldn’t allow your heart to crumble like it had in the past. It took you way too long to put it all back together, not even sure if all the pieces were actually there in the mended mess within your chest.

However, this time it was different. You weren’t sure how exactly, but you could feel that it was. It was when you heard the bell to the front door chime, and the small voice that greeted your coworker that your heart started hammering. The softness of his words, the contemplative hum when asked if he preferred a to-go cup or a waffle cone today, and the sweet “thank you,” once you heard his receipt print.

Choi Jongho.

“You’re late,” you teased, peaking your head out from behind the polka dotted curtain that served as a barrier between your makeshift break room area and the parlor, your eyes meeting him from behind the counter. The boy in question took a bite from his ice cream cup, the yellow spoon he held looked comically small in his hand.

“I’m sorry, I had some last minute things to pick up before tomorrow.” You frowned, remembering why today was different than all the other days you spent with Jongho this summer. He was going back to school tomorrow. Which meant he was leaving you, like everyone else had. Part of you hated that you continued to see him since you first met at the beginning of the summer. He made it perfectly clear that he was just here for the summer to get away from the city. At first, you wanted nothing to do with him. But, when he started coming into the parlor every few days with his gummy smile shining brighter than the sun itself, the excuses eventually ran out and the truth that he just wanted to see you revealed itself. Of course, you couldn’t help that you had fallen so undeniably hard for him.

But you wouldn’t tell him that.

“I guess it’s fine,” you playfully pushed your shoulder into his as you passed him walking towards the exit “but that just means you’re buying dinner tonight.” He chuckled, and followed right behind you in tandem, but not before flashing you a knowing grin.

“Naturally.”

—

Your nights had blurred together over the summer. You spent most of your time together cooped up in your apartment, you and Jongho not caring to go out very much. You were happy watching a movie on the couch or staying up until dawn telling stories and secrets you didn’t have anyone else to share them with. You were thankful to have met Jongho. He was a sweet escape from reality, and it felt mutual for once. It was definitely a bittersweet evening as you two sat across from one another, chicken and beer being the meal of choice as you reminisced about your time spent together the past two months.

“Short and sweet.” You kept telling yourself. “You’re used to this.” So why did it sting more than it usually did?

“I have a question for you,” Jongho said as he wiped the chicken grease off of his fingers, placing all his trash in the takeout bag on the floor next to your bed.

“Somehow, that scares me.” You joked, but an underlying sense of fear was laced between your words. He sensed it, but didn’t mention it as he laid on his side, propping himself up on his elbow while his feet dangled off the end of the bed. You got up to take everything into the kitchen and froze when you heard him speak up a bit louder so you couldn’t miss the question.

“Why are you so against endings?” There it was. You sighed, recalling when you first met one another that you had expressed this fear to him briefly. He didn’t push you to explain, but for some reason unbeknownst to you, you felt like he deserved an answer now.

“Because,” you sat back down cross legged next to him in the dimly lit bedroom, fiddling with your fingers while you felt his gaze on you never falter. He waited patiently for you to continue. “They’re just so…final.” He hummed in response, breathing in deeply as he calculated his response.

“But they don’t have to be,” he began, your gaze fixed on a stain on the wall that you hadn’t noticed before. “They can be the middle man that needs to make room for something else. Endings are so crucial because they show you that whatever happened, happened for a reason, but wasn’t meant to be permanent. Which is also okay. With that, it’s an opportunity for a new beginning perhaps.”

“But how will I know?”

“You just will. You’ll feel it in here,” he placed the palm of his hand above your left breast, feeling the steady beat of your heart under his touch. “You think you know when something that has to come to an end in your life is bad, because you assume it will turn out that way. But,” he paused, and brought his hand up to your cheek to wipe away the stray tear that had fallen from your eye, unbeknownst to you, with his thumb. “It’s not always bad. It’s just clearing the path for something better to come along.” You nodded, hearing his words but having a hard time accepting them, the lump that had lodged itself in your throat was clear evidence of that fact.

“Everyone,” you started, the words getting stuck on your tongue as you wiped the tears that had begun to free fall and leave salty tracks on your cheeks. “Everyone I’ve ever cared for has left. So much so that I’ve just stopped caring altogether and have become accustomed to not feeling at all.”

“That’s not true,” He stated matter-of-factly. Your eyebrows furrowed, a small smile appearing across his features. “I just think you’re a very guarded person, and there’s nothing wrong with that.” He reached out and grabbed your hand, rubbing slow comforting crescents into the back of your hand with his thumb. “However, you shouldn’t fear all endings.”

“What good could come from an ending?” His eyes looked down between the two of you before coming back up to meet your own.

“Well,” he scooted closer to you, the small grin reappearing on his face. “For example, the end of summer means the beginning of fall. That’s not so bad is it?” You shook your head, your heart beginning to beat wildly in your chest as he slowly inched closer to you. “And,” he placed one hand on your cheek, caressing his finger across the softness of your skin and down to your chin. “I would like to end hiding our feelings for one another, so we can maybe begin something together,” he said lowly, his face now in your space, his breath warm on your lips as he painfully ghosted his lips against yours. “That doesn’t sound so bad either, does it?” Your breath hitched, not really sure what to do with Jongho this close to you while he confessed his feelings so outwardly, honestly, unapologetically. You shook your head again in response, not sure when your voice decided to abandon you. “Can I kiss you now?” He whispered, waiting for your approval to close the gap that you so desperately wanted him to do. You nodded, afraid to speak because you weren’t sure what would come out if you did. “Okay,” he said under his breath, and just like that, his lips pressed delicately to yours. It was soft, sweet, small, but so inviting. He pulled away and blinked a few times, the fondness he had been hiding all this time pouring out of him. “I’ve been waiting all day to do that.” He chuckled, eyes honest and so, so soft for you. Before you could even form a thought, your lips were back on his, this time you were not going to be holding back. You wanted to let your walls down so he could climb over and bury his love in the sacred garden of your heart.

“I don’t want to rush into anything, but I need to feel your hands on me. I just want, need, to touch you. Everywhere. Now. Please.” He was taken off guard by your rushed confession, he pulled back and eyed you, trying to read into your words to find why there was so much desperation behind them.

“But, tomorrow-” he began, but you pressed your finger to his lips to silence him.

“I’m tired of fighting. Myself, my feelings, everything. Letting people into my life was terrifying, but you somehow turn my world upside down, Choi Jongho.” You stated firmly, more so for yourself than for him. You looked into his chocolate eyes and felt your entire body melt under his gaze. You couldn’t deny how Jongho made you feel any longer. “I don’t care that you’re leaving tomorrow. I just care about us right here, right now. Somehow, I just know this isn’t really the end. I trust you. I trust this,” you gestured between the two of you. He placed his palm against your cheek and had his lips reconnected to yours without hesitation, your confession being enough for him.

“I want this. I want us.” He declared against your tongue, the warmth of affection blooming within your chest as you pulled him down on top of you, your back pressing gently into the mattress beneath you.

“I’m yours, Jongho. I always have been. Ever since you walked through those parlor doors two months ago.” You dragged your fingers lightly up and down his back, tracing invisible patterns onto his tanned skin as his mouth placed barely there kisses along your neck, collarbone and any available skin he could find. His fingers danced their way to the hem of your tshirt and he looked up at you through his eyelashes.

“May I remove these?” He looked down at your shirt and shorts you had changed into only a few hours prior. “They’re in my way.” You giggled at his frustration, nodding in approval. His fingers grazed the soft skin of your sides as he lifted the fabric up and off of you. He sat back and stared at you for a moment, drinking in the sight before him. “God, you’re beautiful.” He proclaimed, like you stole his breath away in that moment with just your beauty. He quickly took his shirt and jeans off, discarding them onto the floor somewhere, his anxiously awaiting fingers twitching at the thought of touching you everywhere. Without hesitation, his hands were back on you, running up and down your sides, feeling every curve and edge, taking in every sensation under his fingertips. “You’re as soft as flower petals.” He spoke into your skin, his lips immediately reconnecting to it as he peppered wet kisses down your chest and to your tummy. He groaned when his achingly hard member brushed against your leg, the wet spot on his briefs the tell tale sign that he wanted you just as badly as you had wanted him.

“Jongho, I need you.” Your hands fumbled at his waistband and slid his briefs down, his cock springing out, eliciting a small gasp from your lips. He hovered over you, one of his hands disappearing to move the lace aside so he could run his finger between your folds. Your sighed, eyes closing at the sensation of his warm finger playing at your entrance. You soon felt him sink his digits into you slowly, allowing you to become accustomed to the stretch. He began to pump in and out of you at an agonizing pace, his eyes hooded as they watched you squirm under just the touch of his fingers. He removed the thin fabric from your body and dipped back down to press another sloppy kiss to your awaiting mouth.

“You have me.” He whispered against your lips. He removed his fingers once he could feel the spot he needed and positioned himself above you, his tip at your entrance. “You have all of me.” He said as he pushed himself inside of you, both of you moaning lowly once he bottomed out. He laid himself on top of you, taking both of your hands and positioning your arms above your head as he intertwined your fingers. His lips were back on yours as he began to thrust lovingly into you, pulling completely out and sinking right back in. Feeling your walls engulf him completely over and over again sent heat waves through your veins, the fire igniting in your abdomen almost immediately with overwhelming emotions. The way he kissed you like you were star crossed lovers reuniting, the way he held you firmly but gently as he thrusted slowly but as deep as he possibly could into you so you could feel every inch of him.

“Jongho, I’m gonna-” you breathed into his mouth, squeezing his hands on either side of your head. Your back arched, allowing his cock to rub against your sweet spot, which resulted in him swallowing your moans as he felt you clench around him. He relished in how melodic his name sounded rolling off the top of your tongue while you orgasmed, costing his dick with your slick. His thrusts began to fall out of the rhythm he made for himself, your name pouring from his lips like honey. He pressed his face into the crook of your neck, his small whimpers filling your ear and making you aware of the overstimulation your core was feeling as he reached his peak. He soon followed with his release, his hot seed spilling into you as he rode his orgasm out. Once he emptied himself into you, he collapsed on top of you, cock going flaccid inside of you as your sweaty bodies stuck together. Both of your chests were rising and falling at a rapid pace in unison as your fingers found his hair, combing through it affectionately.

“That ending wasn’t so bad either,” he panted, an honest chuckle leaving his lips. You swatted at him weakly, your own laugh betraying you as it escaped your chest. You laid there with him splayed against your chest, his hands tangling within your hair. The only sound that soon filled the room was the way his hummingbird heart sang, and oh, how it only sang for you.

—

“I’ll call you. Every day.” A sad smile spread across Jongho’s face as he looked down at the train ticket in his hand.

“Promise?”

“Promise.” He played with your fingers, his eyes on the floor between you two. Neither of you wanted him to go, but you knew this wasn’t the last time you’d see him. You pressed your forehead to his, closing your eyes as you took a moment to memorize his musky sandalwood perfume that had surely seeped into your sheets from last night. You felt him lift away from you, his lips pressing firmly to the spot his head previously rested on. The lingering kiss he left you had your stomach in knots, but you couldn’t deny that it wasn’t all good. A part of you still feared goodbyes, but this time was different.

Jongho was different.

When you both heard the announcement for the train’s arrival, you parted. Your eyes met one last time, mutual looks of longing exchanged between the two of you. He leaned down as the train came to an approach, his lips slotting with yours for one final time.

“I’ll see you around.” He pushed a loose strand of hair behind your ear, and you did not dare mention the tears forming in his eyes. He turned away and boarded, but once seated, he looked out the window and back at you. He breathed against the glass to fog it up, his finger drawing a small heart for you to see. You felt a wet chuckle form in your throat, hot tears spilling down your cheeks as you both waved at one another, the train pulling him further and further away from you. You stood there for a moment until the train was but a mere dot in your vision, feet refusing to move and accept the reality that Jongho was now gone.

You walked through the station, feet dragging you along as you felt your heart sinking within your rib cage. You took your phone out of your pocket when you felt it buzz and you swore your heart grew wings and flew away when you saw the text.

“Here’s to our new beginning.”

You felt the warmth spread throughout your chest, fondness bleeding from your veins. Visions of the previous night replayed in your head as you headed out of the station, phone clutched to your heart as you felt it beat for the boy on that had stolen your heart this summer.

You’ve always hated endings. But this time, you didn’t really seem to mind.

#ateez smut #ateez x reader #jongho #jongho smut #choi jongho #jongho x reader #jongho x you #jongho x y/n #jongho x chubby reader #chubby reader #ateez x you #ateez x fem reader #ateez x y/n #jongho fluff #ateez fluff

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astrobydalia · 2 years

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Relationship observations pt. III

I actually meant to post this on Valentines Day but overthinking and procrastination took over as usual ☺️✨

Relationship observations: pt. I and pt. II

Masterlist

Work by: astrobydalia on tumblr

Juno in Aries people either get married quite young or they get married to someone younger or both things might occur

Juno in 1st house tho IS a big indicative of marring very young after having a love at first sight situation with the person

Also, Juno in Aries/1st house people will marry someone that is just like them in some way

Similar thing can happen if you have Juno in Leo/5th house, you guys just have very similar personalities and get along like buddies. You’ll definitely marry someone you’ll have lots of fun and laughs with

Venus-Chiron aspects indicates attracting third-party situations in relationships. It's not necessarily cheating (could be) but things along the lines of your partner being in a relationship when you meet them, falling for two people, etc.

I swear I’ve never seen Cancer and Taurus placements NOT ending up together

Mars in the 1st house synastry: honestly I really dislike this overlay. Yeah it creates great attraction blah blah but it’s honestly the most superficial overlay in my opinion cause it’ll only make you interested on how the other person presents themselves not wanting to look into deeper levels of their personality, which turns to be incredibly irritating in the long run. Not a good indicator for longevity in any connection.

Capricorn moon in the Juno persona chart indicates the marriage can feel a bit "serious" and maybe even traditional, could indicate unhappy marriage or a partner that is not emotionally expressive. This also indicates a marriage that is hard to break, I've seen this in people who felt the "obligation" to maintain the marriage for some reason

Eros is often interpreted as just a sexual asteroid but I've very much often observed that people end up committing to those who embody typical traits of their Eros sign which goes to show that Eros is also related to romantic/platonic attraction (just like in mythology) and not just sexual attraction

I've observed so so so many times Fire moons pairing up with Earth moons and these couples work surprisingly well together. Basically the earth moon calms down and grounds the fire moon and the fire moon person energizes and amuses the earth moon person. It's pretty cute.

I don’t know why people don’t talk about 2nd house synastry/heavy 2nd house in composite more often. 2nd house is significantly more common than 7th house in many long-term/married couples. This house literally represents stability and our sense of value, things we feel like are worth maintaining because of the value we give to them. Therefore 2nd house synastry or activated 2nd house in composite indicates you see potential of long-term stability in that relationship and you also value your connection together.

I don't think people talk about how commitment-phobic Scorpio/8th house Venus people can be a lot of times. They can be exactly what people think Aquarius Venus is. I’ve seen SOOOO many Scorpio/8th house venus people being super indulgent in their relationships like wanting an open relationship, avoiding labels, getting in on-and-off situatioships and even cheating sometimes. They are deep down very hedonistic and want to explore their sexuality. If they find someone they genuinely wanna settle with they'll be fiercely loyal, but they're not necessarily looking to get attached like that right off the bat cause they see love as giving someone the power to hurt you so a lot of times they just get into relationships to test the waters and if they find the love of their life great but if they don’t then they’re okay with just having a good time *wink wink*

People with moon in the 7th house are the type to dye their hair blond bc their crush likes blonde girls or stuff like that

Libra, Pisces, Cancer and Virgo placements are literally the ones who invented the "don't leave, we can try again and make it work" concept

Gemini risings will attract wealthy partners!!! Nobody talks about this enough but I swear I haven’t seen a single Gemini rising who didn’t have a wealthy partner/spouse. Their 7th house is ruled by Jupiter after all.

All Cardinal Venus people loooove the chase and those first stages in a relationship

Gemini Venus naives either date literal clones of the same type of person over and over again or they date people that are completely different from each other. No in-between

Libra Venus people think they have a type but deep down they don’t know what they want. One day you’ll see them date someone that is the exact opposite of what they previously described as their “perfect partner”

People with 8th house Venus/Mars are the type to make out with random people in clubs and parties just for the sake of it lol

Venus/Mars in Aquarius or aspecting Uranus will at least once in their life date someone who their family doesn't approve of

Aries moons engage in toxic and co-depandant relationships more than scorpio placements

I’ve noticed people with Venus in the 4th house end up with partners who have a very childish/immature energy either physically or mentally

It’s well-known that Juno persona chart talks about spouse but I’ve noticed it also represents how the marriage is from your pov

Everyone talks about Pluto but honestly natives with Moon-Saturn or Venus-Saturn or Saturn in the 7th house are the ones who will REALLY get themselves in very toxic, possessive and controlling relationships. (Saturn = authority, restrictions)

I’ve noticed Capricorn placements always end up falling for Virgos particularly

Something I’ve noticed about 8th house synastry that nobody talks about is that this overlay a lot of times comes with a whole deal of admiration. The planet person specially is able to easily see everything the house person is capable of (since this is the house of our inner power) and this can either be intimidating or threatening for the planet person or on the contrary it can cause literal fascination and admiration for the house person (this is where the infamous obsession comes from). When healthy, the planet person could really desire to lift up and empower the house person or the planet person feels more empowered around the house person or vice versa. When developed this overlay causes genuine devotion and loyalty in the couple

I personally believe natives with Moon-Pluto aspects belong with people who also have Moon-Pluto aspects in their own natal chart (romantically), otherwise they will feel very misunderstood and alone in their own intensity. Although this can be a double-edged sword too

Natives with Chiron in Libra/7th house are serial daters. The type to jump from one relationships to another in a matter of months. They’re usually loyal tho

Pay attention to PoF in the Juno persona chart, I’ve observed this sign/energy is bound to be significant in the chart of your fs

Capricorn Venus have this tendency to be condescending or patronizing with their loved ones, because in their mind they're just taking care of you

#astrology #astro #astro observations #astro notes #zodiac #ascendant #birth chart #gemini #moon signs #capricorn #synastry #composite rising #composite

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evasiveagaric · 3 months

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I have a physical reaction every time i think about the queercoding of Dave at the end of homestuck. My roommate and I were reading it and i kept having to take a moment to think “holy shit, is he coming out??? is that what we missed on the meteor round 2?”. I don’t keep up with Andrew Hussie news bc i don’t really like him as a person, but the whole talk with Egbert on the lillypad makes me think Hussie either was really close to a queer person or queer himself with just how accurately he wrote Dave talking about the queer experience, even if he doesn’t actually come out in that part. It doesn’t feel like queerbaiting either bc it bc fits with Dave’s characterization and how hard it is for him to talk about anything sincerely.

I don’t want to downplay the importance of Dave realizing the thoughts Bro instilled in him about how a man should act in favor of speculating about his sexuality tho. Not wanting to be a stoic hero of man who doesn’t have attachments or be soft with anyone is a huge part of Dave’s characterization and character arc. I think they go hand in hand tho, his struggles with toxic masculinity and his sexuality. I think the conversation was blatantly about both while Dave gave himself an out to pretend it was just about one. And he didn’t even do that.

I’m about to get hella pretentious and read way too much into things under the cut. More rambling about Dave’s character arc as a whole and nitpicking of dialogue towards the end of homestuck down below.

Future peepaw edit: this turned into a fucking play by play essay, my bad

Out of order but I also want to talk about his characterization as a whole.

Homestuck Mobile formatting jumpscare:

He’s willing to talk about another guy’s feelings. Romantic ones. for someone at the time presents as a guy. It doesn’t even feel like he’s joking. 13 year old Dave would never.

And this happens before all the stuff i mentioned earlier, showing exactly what he talked about. I honestly don’t think any other character has an arc like Dave’s. Which, seeing as Dave is a fully fleshed out complex character that makes sense, but I mean in general. I have consumed a lot of media, i’ve consumed a lot of queer media too. I’m really into the history of queercoding and how it relates to representation. I don’t think I’ve seen a character arc quite like Dave’s, especially in relation to sexuality and toxic masculinity.

Egbert assumes that Dave’s being a dick on purpose, and Dave rebukes it so strongly he uses an exclamation point. In a series where how people type is kind of a big thing, Dave’s frequent lack of punctuation is a nod to his “cool guy” facade, the lack of tone indication part of the “mystery” a cool guy has to be surrounded with. So, the fact that he feels strongly enough, or has loosened up enough on the cool guy show no emotions routine speaks to his self reflection. Of course this is stated literally a few more dialogue lines down, about how much time he spent on the meteor thinking about societal norms and his Bro’s teachings but the fact that it’s sprinkled in before hand too makes it feel less like it’s come out of the blue, or that it’s out of character.

“yeah we coulda talked about this” says so much. Not only to his relationship with Karkat (romantic or not, i’m a Davekat shipper but that’s not what i’m getting at here) but just how far he’s come with getting close to others. Not to mention the fact that it’s implied that they talk at least somewhat frequently about heavy and deep issues such as feelings for other people definitely feels like a major shift in Dave’s character, one for the better.

He’s probably been vulnerable with Karkat in a way that he never was with anyone as a kid. They talk about things. They talk about important enough things that Karkat’s past black crush on Egbert never coming up probably feels a little strange, hence Dave asking if he’s been thinking about it all this time. He has that connection with Karkat, which is important bc Karkat is masculine presenting. I’d bet money that Bro would not have approved, regardless of them just being friends or not.

That level of vulnerability? Not immediately calling Karkat gay and dunking on him? Treating what would be seen a gay relationship as completely normal and not even something to bat an eye at? 13 year old Dave WISHES he had the emotional maturity Dave has now.

He even encourages Karkat to hold on to those feelings bc Egbert expressed that they could hate people, at least platonically. Egbert even calls him out, saying he sounds like he’s being a dick about it and Dave says he’s being real.

Not to mention he kind of forgets that Egbert “isn’t a homosexual” at this point, that or he suspects Egbert isn’t straight in some capacity. I think he has less hang ups about queerness than Karkat does at this point. Or at least less hang ups about being honest. It feels fitting for his character and i’m sad that most of that character arc is off screen. I get it tho, writing meteorstuck round 2 would have made homestuck significantly longer most likely.

In conclusion: I like Dave and his character arc too damn much. I have to go to work now, i was not expecting to have this many thoughts about it and i’ve rambled enough.

#homestuck #dave strider #does this count as #character study #karkat vantas #john egbert #june egbert #i’m vague on pronouns for Egbert #peepaw story time

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onetoomanyfandomfixations · 1 year

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OM Demons & Their Broadway Duets

A.k.a the duet you two perform together that’s just a lil bit too on the nose

LUCIFER

You cannot tell me that he’s Not the same person as Hades

Mans has shit to do!!

But that doesn’t stop him from wanting you one bit

He knows he can seduce you, and that’s exactly what he will do

Also has that Stunningly deep voice thats just perfect for this roll

Enjoys making you squirm on stage with his words and voice

Probably circles around you whilst singing

10/10 very hot

Will def invite you to see him after the performance for some quality time

MAMMON

The exact kind of greedy, insecure loving he needs

He wants to sing more because “The Great Mammon deserves the spotlight”

So he sings Elphaba

Tbh, finds it really therapeutic to express his feelings for you so wholly

LOVES that its so intimate; he gets to hold you, with an undeniable excuse!

Gets so flustered during rehearsals

Only makes him love you more

Listens to it often, cause it makes him happy to think of you

He will deny this

LEVIATHAN

He would have died if it was a romance duet, c’mon guys

He was struggling getting on stage as is

So getting to pretend to play video games, right next to you in stage while talking about how he hates everyone else?

Perfect

Has the audio clip of you saying “is it really true, i’m your favourite person”

Listens to it daily

Actually has an Amazing voice, holy shit

It’s Your song and no one else can sing it with you

Probs get the matching pac-man tattoo from the original musical

SATAN

As said before, a hopeless romantic to the core

Thinks this entire musical is god tier

The only one to know and love the entire musical connected to your performance

You see it together “as research” before doing the scene together

Perfect on stage, as expected

Probs cups your face for a Significant portion of the song

Loves being to protector, instead of the persecutor; like he is so often made out to be

Will sing it to you quietly as you slow-dance in his room in the early hours of the morning

Wants it to be the first dance at your inevitable wedding

ASMODEUS

Guess who’s back on their asmo-is-baby bullshit

Mans relates to Audrey So Hard

So its only right he plays her part

You are his Seymor

He tries not to think about it, or else he’ll cry

Thinks its a really beautiful song

Don’t tell him the ending of Little Shop of Horrors, he’ll be devastated

ADORES being on stage, makes every minute of it

Kisses you as soon as the songs over, so deeply and passionately

The audience goes wild

Both of you are grinning wildly

BEELZELBUB

He’s more than happy to sing a song about loving you in front of as many people as you want

Honestly just happy to be spending time with you

Sings Zoe, because he just wants to reassure you that he loves you

Like Lucifer, has a beautifully deep voice

Constantly checking you’re not as insecure as Evan

Makes sure you know he loves you, even if you aren’t insecure in the slightest

A custom bed needs to be built for the two of you to sit on for the scene bc he’s so Large

Puts his heart into the line “I don’t want you to fix what I’d rather forget”, because he needs you to know that you aren’t a replacement for Lilith

He loves you, as you.

BELPHAGOR

Idk what bullying you had to do to get this but go you ig???

Hates JD with a passion

He reminds him too much of how he was during his time in the attic

But it’s almost like a redemption for him; he can do it again but this time he chooses you

He chooses you instead of the anger, the hurt

Voice is probs really raspy because he’s always sleeping

Didn’t do rehearsals, just wung it on opening night

Enforced naptime afterwards

DIAVOLO

Listen, this is Very Directed

He chose this song for a reason; he needs his people to know that loving you is not a political choice

He just loves you

Relates more to Alyssa, but sings Emma for impact

Probs doesn’t have time to be doing something like this??

Barbatos is On Him for the overdue paperwork

But this is Fun

And it’s with You

He loves preforming

Probs has a good vibrato too

Post show fancy dinner date 💕💕

BARBATOS

l i s t e n

Mans is perfect for Warner

Is more than happy to let you have the spotlight

Loves being able to say he loves you so plainly

Sometimes the song makes him think about the realities where you stayed in the human realm

It makes him grateful that you chose the Devildom

That you chose him

But he tries not to linger, because you both have a song to do

Master of honey tea before going on stage

Warm them vocal chords UP

Always praises you on how wonderful you were the second that mics are off

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lvlyghost · 1 year

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Remember

Pairings: Simon “Ghost” Riley x F!Reader

Summary: You and the team go out for a drink. At the end of the night is just you and Simon.

Word Count: 800

Tw: fluff, kyle and soap get drunk, dad!price, that’s all I think(?🥴✨

A/N: idk what this is, i was bored and finished it almost at 1:00 a.m, maybe this is my poor attempt to make a story with ghost bc god i love that man, consider this a second part of i see you although it can be read as an independent one-shot. Please remember english isn’t my first language, corrections are appreciated ✨🤍🌟💕

Part 1✨

You smiled at the camera, closing your eyes and tongue sticking out, Kyle feigned seriousness and snapped the picture. The two of you bursting into laughter as he uploaded the story to his social media. On the other side of the booth Ghost remained stoic.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” He muttered to himself, rolling his eyes at the sight of the two of you. You and Gaz were the youngest ones of the team and that meant hearing you talking about things he couldn’t quite understand or watching you do things on your phones that made no sense whatsoever.

Why did he even agree to come to the pub in the first place?

“I’ll go grab another round!” Kyle announced, not waiting for an answer.

“You should’ve stopped him Lt.” you spoke. “He’s had way too many of those.”

Simon didn’t even turn to look at the sargeant.

“He’s not my bloody problem.”

But deep down you knew he’d look after any of you even off-duty.

“Hmm. Last time I checked you stopped me from grabbing us those shots of tequila back in Mexico, remember?”

He does. But apparently you didn’t remember what happened that night.

And he’d keep it that way.

“You would’ve ended up choking on your own vomit, lightweight.”

You bring and hand to your chest, mouth hanging open. You can’t help it, you laugh. He’s just…

“Wow, thank you Simon. Anyway, Kyle could be the one choking on his own vomit if we don’t stop him n… where’s Johnny?”

Simon nods his head to the other side of the pub, Price is trying to get him out of the pub, completely drunk. Kyle comes back empty handed and offended.

“Apparently, the barman says I’ve had too much. Why don’t you grab some for us Lt.? You look just fine…”

“Alright that’s it muppet, you too.” Price is now grabbing Kyle by the arm and leading him to the exit before he can even say anything. It’s getting late and you know the Captain wouldn’t come back to get you nor Simon.

“And then there were two.” You smile. “Wanna get out of here?”

He inhales deeply and nods, standing up and offering you a big calloused hand to help you out of the booth.

You had always wondered why he was so kind to you. Ghost was known as this tall, broody and mysterious man that no one wanted to cross paths with. Dangerous and feared. He was easily a good foot taller than you and could break you in an instant if he ever wanted to. Yet here he was.

Offering his hand to you, looking down straight to your big doe eyes. You always thought he had a staring problem. When he was looking at you –especially now– like that, you couldn’t help but wonder if he at least felt the way you did, just a little part of him…

You absolutely adored how safe he made you feel. Recalling that day when he had followed you all the way to the armory after your failed attempt to dating this one guy.

“You alright there kid?” He asks, leading both of you out in the hot summer air.

“Mhm.” That’s all you offer, you wish you could say more. Wish you could say all the things you wanted to him. You felt silly. A silly girl with a crush with her superior. You had convinced yourself it’ll go away. Simon Riley wasn’t one to have romantic feelings he had told you before.

“That’s just not for me.” He had stated, firmly after a rather hard mission. Things had gone sideways too soon.

“How long have we known each other, sir?” You suddenly ask, walking down the street and to the barracks.

“Over a year. I don’t know, why are you asking?”

He knew exactly how long you’ve known each other he just had to act like he didn’t.

Shrugging you stare right ahead.

“I know I’ve asked before but uh, you ever think of settling down? Like finding a partner and having someone to go home to?”

“No.” His answer is blunt, and for some reason it makes your chest tighten. “Things like that don’t work for people like us.”

“Why?” You inquire so fast, turning your head to see him. “How do you know that? You’ve never…”

“I just do.” He grunts in response.

Maybe you’re imagining things now but you could’ve sworn he took a quick glance at your lips before looking elsewhere.

Still you playfully nudge his side after a few seconds of silence. If it were someone else Simon would’ve been furious.

“Never say never, sir.”

Somehow you find yourself smiling and Ghost knew, he knew that would be a problem.

If only you could remember what happened that night in Las Almas…

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petitesmafia · 2 months

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Genuinely what did Dazai do? Out of even anime characters in general, what is so bad and evil about him? In the same anime he’s from there’s a pedophile, why doesn’t he cause such visceral hatred from people? Most Dazai haters like characters like Light or Sasuke, are you telling me Dazai is worse than a genocidal maniac or a Dictator with a god complex? More specifically, his main competitor, Chuuya, why is he considered so kind and good just because he’s not “manipulative”? Why is Chuuya’s evil actions either ignored or justified constantly 24/7 but we have to be reminded of Dazai’s everytime? Why is there such hypocrisy? Why are all Dazai ships so hated? Why do people ship Soukoku or any other Dazai ship if they hate Dazai and think he shouldn’t be with anyone romantically? Why do you even think that way? Dazai also deserves love, what did he do so evil that even a pedophile and a misogynist gets so much more sympathy from him? What exactly did Dazai do to this fandom?

Why does Dazai only need to be in love with Chuuya in soukoku and not the other way around? Why do the shippers only enjoy this ship when it’s one sided and Dazai is constantly suffering? Why do Skk shippers not want Chuuya to like Dazai back? How is it exactly that Chuuya is the one who deserves better, when it’s Dazai who keeps saying Chuuya is a human but is told his own humanity is a “joke” by this same person Dazai is kind to? Why do shippers defend this? Apparently both Skk are not perfect people, so when it’s Dazai is accepted he did Chuuya wrong which is I don’t know what exactly, but when it’s Chuuya doing shitty things to Dazai, it’s not an issue, it needs to justified somehow? Why do Dazai “stans” like this people or this ship so much if they “love” Dazai, why are all Dazai “stans” even okay with this? Why do you stan him then? Why do you say you “love” Dazai if you think Chuuya is cooler?? Why can’t you just go and stan him?? What did Dazai do to skk shippers? What is so cool about Chuuya when he’s criminal who still actively harms people?

imagine how successful you'd be if you showed this level of tenacity in academics and life instead of being on my ass for liking Chuuya

genuinely why are you constantly sending me shit still when i haven't even done anything to you or said anything hateful about Dazai. it has been almost 4 YEARS. why are you still in this one-sided beef with Chuuya and with me. why do you feel the need to harass and send people death threats simply bc they like Chuuya more. why do you claim to dislike Chuuya and Chuuya stans yet you come searching for my account all the time and doing the absolute fucking most to circumvent my blocking. why is it so difficult for you to grasp that just bc some people like Chuuya more, it does not mean they hate or even dislike Dazai. why is it so hard for you to take a step back and realize that not everything is meant to be "anti-Dazai" just bc you have interpreted it as such. you have harassed people over obvious jokes, you have harassed people when they haven't even mentioned Dazai bc you always feel the need to insert him into the narrative and then attack the person. i could mention Chuuya and the Flags and here you come with 10 messages telling me i should kill myself and slit my wrists bc the Flags are "flop Buraiha". why are you making it seem like it's about you defending Dazai when reality is it's about you not liking Chuuya. why do you not spend your time talking about Dazai on your own account rather than searching up Chuuya on the daily and making 5 million burners on every social media platform possible to attack people for posts that aren't even remotely harmful or related to Dazai. do you actually give a fuck about Dazai, or do you just hate to see Chuuya get loved by the fandom?

majority of the people you have deemed "Dazai haters" (which, frankly, you have deluded yourself into thinking is everyone besides you) don't even hate Dazai. they'll make one harmless joke or a random post and suddenly they'll be branded by you as a "Dazai anti", bc you do not know how to consume media in a healthy way, and you feel the need to project and make your problem everyone else's. there are plenty of people who have spoken in Dazai's defense of his change after leaving port mafia, about his fight in the light, yet you don't see that bc you are too busy searching up Chuuya and getting mad at Chuuya stans for talking about Chuuya. you seek out certain content that you know you don't like, then nitpick and generalize the fandom as a whole when it is your problem to deal with. don't even come here with that bitchass whining about certain people not "loving" Dazai bc the minute someone you don't like says something about Dazai, even if it's positive, you'll be there telling them to shut up and not speak on him. i have already been through your questions with you in the past so there's no point in going over them again, considering all you'll do is spam me with insults and threats bc you have no actual intentions of having a civil conversation. byeee

#ena replies #are you in love with me or something #the way you make burners just to check in on me constantly...like ok #i implore you to go outside breathe in some fresh air to clear out the cobwebs in that echo chamber you call a skull

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sabo-has-my-heart · 10 months

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Drabbles

the drabbles I promised for my gofundme. Sorry this took so long!

pls pls pls gimmie some hopeless romantic crocodile stuff I'm in need of some passionate kisses nd phrases of my one and only Sir (daddy issues kickin in). It's fem reader and sorry for the bad grammar ... if u did it thanks for not ignoring me (>д<)

You sat on a couch, smiling as you cuddled up to your boyfriend. You were feeling snuggly today and thankfully he wasn’t doing anything. He was busy so often that he didn’t always get a lot of time to just cuddle with you, meaning that when he did get time, you jumped at it. You couldn’t help it, you liked holding your beloved sandman. He always rolled his eyes at the nickname, but you were pretty sure he liked it, if nothing else, he never fought it. Looking up at him, your smile widened before sitting on your knees to press a kiss to his cheek.

“I love you, Sandman.” you whispered softly, making him chuckle.

“I love you too, my desert flower.” he kissed you, his kisses going from soft and sweet to passionate and loving. He loved you so much, you were his desert flower, one he would protect no matter what.

******

Hello, I have this like... Idea... About Trafalgar Law x reader

(reader c-can be gender neutral)

But reader has this big scar on their left eye, no one has seen it yet and reader is very very insecure about it...

Maybe angst with comfort? Idk…

You always hid the scar, styling your hair to sit over it so that nobody saw. You didn’t want anybody to see it, it wasn’t exactly small and it wasn’t exactly beautiful. People had stared at you in shock and horror before because of it. You’d gotten bad looks, people thinking that you were some kind of thug just because of your eye. So you’d started hiding it. Part of you knew Law didn’t usually care about looks, but with how many people had said things before, you couldn’t risk it. Standing in your room, you took a deep breath, running your hand through your hair, pushing it away from your eye. It had been a long day and you just wanted to relax.

“I wondered why you wore your hair like that.” his voice made your head snap over to look at him, the look in your eyes one of surprise and horror. You hadn’t wanted him to see you like this! “Calm down, Y/n. It’s alright. I was just coming in to check on you but you weren’t answering. I heard you had a long day. Thought I might cheer you up.” you looked away, covering the scar with your hand while moving to comb your hair back over it. Feeling his hand on your wrist that combed your hair, you looked up at him.

“You can hide it from everyone else, but I don’t want you hiding it from me. I love you, all of you.” he said, pulling your other hand away from your eye, placing a gentle kiss to the scar, “I’ll always love you, even if your entire body is covered in hundreds of scars.”

******

How would katakuri react to his fem!s/o always looking at him as if asking for his permission to fight or beat someone up

He didn’t really understand your need to look to him for permission. If you needed to fight, why ask him for permission? He always nodded anyway. Afterall, if you felt the need to fight then why not let you? You were strong enough to hold your own as well, which brought him back to why? Not that he minded too terribly, he was rarely if ever busy when you gave him that look, he wanted you to know you could fight your own battles if you wanted, so he let you do as you wanted for the most part. So long as it didn’t interrupt your lives, he was fine with it. Besides, you’d tell him in time, right?

******

(Oneshot)I’d like to request how law would react to accidentally hurting his s/o (you can choose how)during one of his check ups on them and his s/o starts crying a little bc of the pain

It was just a shot, a small flu shot like most of the crew got. But he’d accidentally stabbed it in too hard. He’d been having a hard day and some of the crew didn’t want the flu shot, so he’d stabbed it in before you could attempt to get away from it like the others. When you’d flinched and tears started running down your cheeks, his body had gone ridgid. He hadn’t meant to hurt you, even a little pain. He’d pulled the needle back before he could inject the flu vaccine. He didn’t want to risk making things worse by injecting it into a bad spot.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.” he said softly, wiping away the small droplets of blood before kissing the spot. Okay, yes, it was extremely unhygienic to do so, but you needed comfort right now! Even if the pain wasn’t too bad!

“You um… having a bad day? You asked quietly, wiping the tears away. Law just chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah. The rest of the crew haven’t been too thrilled with their shots. They keep trying to escape. I’ve had to remove limbs to give them shots. I nearly had to sedate Shachi.” he said with a sigh.

“Well how about I make your day easier? Give me my flu shot and give me one of the cute Bepo bandaids that I know you keep hidden and I’ll go make you some onigiri. Deal?” Law smiled and nodded, unlocking a drawer and pulling out one of the adorable orange bandaids before picking the syringe back up. He’d be more careful this time.

#one piece #one piece trafalgar d water law #one piece trafalgar law #trafalgar d law #trafalgar law #trafalgar law x reader #sir crocodile x reader #crocodile x reader #one piece sir crocodile #one piece crocodile #one piece katakuri #katakuricharlotte #katakuri x reader #katakuri #one piece drabble #drabble

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dailyy-me · 7 months

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I recently read The First to Die at the End by Adam Silvera

Wow.

Just, wow.

(Please don’t read if you don’t want spoilers, I’m not going to hold back on my rant so read at your own risk).

I’ve read a lot of peoples reviews for this one because honestly it was hard to make up my mind about it as a whole. At the end of the day, I think my only problem with the book was the point of view from the creator of Death Cast. While it was really interesting to see and learn about his life, it didn’t reveal any relevant information we didn’t already know or any new information we needed. With that being said, it’s probably one of my favorite books now.

Adam just loves to intertwine the lives of his characters. And he does it so seamlessly. Nothing feels forced or awkward. And if it feels too coincidental, isn’t life that way too??

The fact that he wrote about little Rufus and Mateo was a genius way to give us more from those characters without disturbing the events from the first book. If anything, it’s helped us understand even more why they were the way they were and appreciate how much they managed to live with all of it on their backs.

The whole story reads like a romantic tragedy written in the stars. And the fact that one of the characters is named Orion and the other Valentino is absolutely wonderful. Their story isn’t perfect because if it was they would’ve grown old together and they would get to keep loving each other for far longer than they got. That being said.. it is a beautiful story. Adam was able to, once again, raise the questions about mortality and how people live their life, but this time with new perspectives than last time. Reading about Orion's pain of constantly HAVING to think about death and the very real consequences a simple fun outing with his sister could have was eye opening to me. In the first book, I couldn't understand how anyone could wish for a service like Death Cast, but after truly listening to Orion it made sense to me. I truly felt his fears, and worried for him along with his sister. It was also refreshing to see Valentino struggle with religious trauma while still having love or maybe just curiosity about God in a manner that seemed relatable to me. How his parents reacted to him coming out is a huge fear of mine. Reading about it happening to him was truly heartbreaking for me, and his questions and struggles resonated with me deeply.

I would also like to say that Adam surprised me a little when he was able to point out how grief can be a little selfish and how caring about someone so much can create distance between two people like it did with Orion and his sister (I’m so so glad that the characters were able to work through that so quickly because they both needed each other at the end of this story). The way he swirls coincidences and consequences is truly a whirlwind most admirable when you’re right smack in the middle of it all.

(Talking about the ending next, so this is your second warning.)

Honestly speaking, I still don’t know how to feel about the ending. And the feeling of uncertainty towards my feelings is exactly how I would want someone to feel at the end of my own story. I don’t know that I would be okay with someone being happy about how my life ended. I don’t know that I would want them to hate it either. So having the constant debate and conversation feels more comforting than anything else.

(Last Spoilers warning frfr bc the ending was AN EXPERIENCE I do not wish to take from anyone).

Having Valentino give Orion his heart felt like a declaration that love will always live within the stars. And I absolutely love it. Adam, I thank you for this story and these characters.

#adam silvera #the first to die at the end #they both die at the end #lgbtq books #book reccomendation #book review #bookworm #book rant #OLG #valentinOrion

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deathon1leg · 2 years

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it’s kinda funny to me how immediately post vol 2 we all thought that they were using will to develop m*leven’s relationship bc now i can see that they’re doing the opposite. they’re using will to begin the breakdown of m*leven’s relationship (and the start of byler’s)

but it’s clearly not his fault, and him being blameless is actually crucial to this.

they’re using will to demonstrate that their relationship is doomed by just having him be there. they’re even having him try to help them out, yet still m*leven is failing

mike hadn’t seen will or el for almost a year which made it much easier for him to delude himself about his true feelings for both of them. he can convince himself of almost anything if he doesn’t have to confront it in real life. seeing the two of them (especially at the same time) opened the floodgates and his love for will (and his non-romantic feelings for el) became less ignorable, like we saw at the roller rink. it seemed like he was giving all his attention to el but he noticed all of will’s “moping” which apparently “sabotaged” the day.

mike’s fights with both will and el stem from his true feelings for both of them: he feels like he’s losing will and that it’s out of his control, but he’s scared of getting too close to him again because of his non-platonic feelings. he can’t tell el he loves her because he doesn’t love her romantically, and that’s the way she wants him to love her.

these fights, but more particularly their aftermaths, are meant to show us the difference between byler’s and m*leven’s bond and the way they communicate. after their fight mike quickly makes the effort to repair the damage with will and even does some genuine introspection, which is not something he’d usually do, yet he’s managed to several times for will (keep this in your mind for later). but after mike’s fight(s?) with el he doesn’t have a chance to repair anything because she’s taken away to nevada. obviously it’s not mike’s fault that she’s gone before he can apologize but remember the writers CHOSE to do this.

then he can’t preoccupy himself with putting up a front of romantic bliss with el, because she’s far away. he’s alone with will and alone with his feelings for will. he spent HOURS! HOURS in the small backseat of the van next to the boy he’s secretly in love with. he’d expected to have the safety net of el to fall back on for the entire trip. of course he cares for el a lot and does love her platonically, but the safety net could’ve been part of his motivation to get her back.

will IS a device for m*leven, but not to build it up, to disassemble it. will’s a device for mike to realize/accept his feelings and to urge him to compare his feelings/behavior for will in juxtaposition to el.

will’s been acting as mike’s mediator for his relationship with el. he thinks mike is happiest with her and he’s super selfless so he actively tries to FIX their relationship. he reassures mike, he gives him advice, he sympathizes with him, and he pushes him toward el. he’s basically doing all he can to ensure they stay together.

this is one of the most essential parts in will’s role as a device. they’re showing us that no matter how hard will tries to remove himself from the picture of their relationship and advance it forward in disregard to himself, it still doesn’t work out. in fact, his trying to help is destroying m*leven even faster (but mike and will don’t know this yet).

mike WAS clueless that will was talking about himself in the van, but he heard exactly what he wanted to hear. will’s coded love for him was the love mike wanted, and having it presented as el’s love made him think he’s in love with her. he thought his doubts about being with her were solved thanks to will telling him how el really feels—and will thinks he solved it too.

so then mike goes and gives his ily monologue and expresses some disingenuous introspection, contrasting with his genuine introspection during his apology to will earlier. mike took will’s coded confession at face value and used it to conjure up conclusions in his mind that might explain how he’s feeling. it makes enough sense in theory that he’s clung to it, ready to accept it as the truth. he used will’s confession as the basis of his ily monologue because he’s also using it as the basis of his own rationalization of his feelings.

if you don’t look too deep into his monologue and other events of the season then it’s easy to think will was successful in repairing m*leven. the problem is, while mike thinks his monologue was true, the structure of it is all gonna come crashing down sooner or later. once mike finds out will’s coded confession was actually about himself, the basis of his monologue to el is no longer there, or, it’s there, but then it’s technically a monologue to will, and he’s gonna realize that will’s love for him is exactly the love he wants/needs. he’ll simultaneously have to confront the fallacy of his “love” for el and the realities of his love for will.

will did all this by just being there and trying to help. they’re showing us that the downfall of m*leven is inevitable and mike’s and will’s love for each other is indispensable. all will had to do was be there and push mike toward el, and without meaning to, he pushed mike away from el and toward himself.

if you’re a will anti or think it’s his fault m*leven is dying then this post isn’t for you. m*leven is dying of its own accord and will is simply there to show us its death is inescapable. he’s only trying to help them, and that’s what makes this such a satisfying story of fate.

in conclusion, byler endgame and platonic elmike ftw!

#another ollie post about byler that started with a small thought and turned into several paragraphs of analysis? no way!!#no but seriously #just read this please #i hope i got my thoughts out right bc. i’m trying to explain what’s happening in my head #byler #stranger things #byler analysis #byler meta #stranger things 4 #anti m*leven

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stupendousfoxthing · 3 months

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if there were to be video or something that came out of jk doing something clearly romantic w a girl, would u think we misinterpreted tkk all this time and were just reading into their interactions way too much? or would u maybe believe they were together at one point and ended it? maybe they’d be in an open relationship? or maybe it rlly was for show?

i didn’t follow ur blog at the time of when the shitstorm happened w the sasaeng taking a video of jk and a girl in his apartment (ik it’s an old topic but it’s one of the only things that gets in the way of tkk for me) but i’m interested to know ur take on whether that video was a romantic interaction or could’ve been just friendly? i believe it was 100% a real video and at first i was so heartbroken and confused abt tae and jk’s relationship. i grappled back and forth w the nature of the interaction in the sasaeng video for a while but the more i watched it the more i thought okay wait it’s like a 15 second video taken super out of context of just one location in his apartment where u can’t even rlly see if they’re alone or what happened prior. and it could be platonic (there were pics of him back hugging his female tattoo artist who was just a friend) especially if he’s not straight and the girl knows about that? i feel like there’s a lot more leeway w platonic physical affection between women and queer men than with straight men (even tho ik of friendships between both straight men and women that are also physically affectionate but still totally platonic). however, i sometimes feel like that sounds like me just rationalizing why it may not be romantic and being in denial. idk bc i don’t want to blindly believe in tkk but i can’t explain away tae and jk’s interactions as being totally platonic either so then i get super conflicted.

sorry ik this is rambling atp and it may be a topic u don’t want to address anymore but i’d love to hear ur interpretation of that whole scenario and how it affected ur beliefs and views on jk/tkk

It would be very hard to convince me now that there wasn't something between Taekook at some point, and it certainly wouldn't all be undone by a clearly romantic something between Jungkook and a girl. You definitely would not be able to convince me that what they did was "for show". Their relationship is authentic no matter what the nature of that relationship is. I've been a Taekooker for a long time now and I think I'm older than the average here. I not only have plenty of receipts for my belief in Taekook, I have context for all of those receipts because I was here when it happened. I was much more active on Twitter when the tattoo artist "scandal" happened, and I actually got tagged with a few of my TK friends by the first shady accounts trying to spread it. When I think back on that time, I just feel bad for everyone involved. Even the tattoo studio staff, who were harassed mercilessly and had their shop vandalized. That had much bigger impact than the recent video, but it's funny because when I saw the convo around that I was just thinking I've already seen him back hugging a woman. If that was enough to debunk Taekook I would have bailed in 2019. The intention of this rumor was exactly the same as well. It follows the same pattern as every other. Post something with no context and that's actually not proof of anything, but spin some wild stories about it. It's very easy with interactions between a man and a woman. Every person I see still posting it everywhere says the woman in the video is his pregnant gf. That's obviously not true. People freaked out because they were told more was coming. That didn't happen. I agree with a lot of your second paragraph. I don't put more weight on interactions just because they're between a man and a woman. I do think it's weird that a few seconds without any context would be enough to question just because it is a man and a woman. I've had plenty of interactions like that with male friends I had no romantic feelings about. Hell, when I was Jungkook's age if a stalker wanted to they could have gotten video of me hugging and kissing people I also had no romantic interest in and never dated. That informs my perspective on things. It's not just heteronormative, it's all a little puritanical to me. I actually wasn't blogging here until a few weeks ago so you're my first ask about this. I appreciate your message. After days of nothing, I got yours and then another (which I'm not going to post because it was obviously someone trying to start shit) a couple of hours later about the exact same topic, so I was a little sus about people trying to troll. But your questions were asked in good faith so I wanted to answer genuinely. Hope you're having a good weekend. ❤️

#asks #taekook

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aranarumei · 4 months

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okay watched ep 2 of fhjy and as anyone might imagine I've got thoughts. under the cut.

lots of fun things this episode! haven't watched the AP yet btw. i'm mostly writing these down myself so I'll go character-by-character, but some overall stuff about the episode:

whatever episode one was doing really paid off here. by itself, the full episode of battle, apart from being excited by all the new intros, was a bit frustrating especially since I wasn't sure how they were actually going to be able to reel the night yorb in, but they did it in this one! with lots of time left over for other stuff.

and with both episodes out, (as i suspected) that really frustrating feeling from episode 1 carries a lot more meaning--brennan making everyone fight those minions was perfect icing on the cake. as well as all those personal troubles at the end. but that gets into character stuff, so:

riz:

riz gukgak is one of my favorite characters in the universe. when i watched fhsy baron happened and i obsessively took notes the whole season bc i was like. riz is aroace and i can prove it. as you can imagine i nearly died when my green heaven released

anyways, pretty much everything riz has done has been so, so, on brand for what I'd think he'd do, so that's great--i feel like I haven't gone wrong in understanding him, which is cool

one of the big things that seems like we'll be getting this season is riz's attachment to his friends, by which i mean he feels like he can't hang out with them unless there's a job to be done. he's got this bit in the boys' night extra where riz says "it's usually like we kind of have this whole group dynamic where all of us come together and we solve these problems together. and when I don’t have a problem to solve, I don’t know what to do with myself." which is pretty much exactly what's going on here. as brennan phrases it, riz has basically just told his mother "I have a pretty a hard time connecting to my dearest friends whose lives I've saved many times unless there's a problem, so I can feel useful."

and this like... deep sense of anxiety around being alone, that's kind of a really deep part of riz's character, right? penny luckstone was his babysitter--closest thing he had to a friend. riz cares a lot about the case, but he probably also cared about the only connection he really had. and now the bad kids are his connections. he wants to be with them, like, forever, and half of his worries about all those romantic entanglements is that everyone is going to prioritize themselves and their romantic partners above him, and since he doesn't... want that kind of thing, where does that leave him? alone? forever? with no place to belong? he's already one of the only goblins we ever see in the whole time we've been in the land of spyre.

and I think what's really heartbreaking about this, at least to me, is that riz so clearly and obviously loves and adores his friends. he doesn't have a problem expressing his love! and I don't think he really even doubts that his friends love him, too. it's just that. i don't think he can deal with the possibility of being without them. and he doesn't know if the fact that they like each other is enough to keep them together. but hey, world-saving does.

sklonda was so good this episode, too. was particularly affected by when she told riz "you do everything for other people, and I want to make sure that you don't get your heart broken" because it's just... yeah. also that's such a real struggle money-wise with college in particular... I really kind of hoped we could maybe help sklonda out with her case, but, it is her job, after all. see where riz gets his board from haha. but seriously, she's just... such a good mother. every time the gukgaks interact it's so warm to me because riz and sklonda just... so obviously care for each other, so carefully. like. not a single bit of resentment or frustration coming from riz once sklonda tells him he might need some to put some extra pressure on himself, and it's partially being fine with pressure, partially not acknowledging his problems, and partially that he's just a good kid and knows his mother's doing the best for him. so he'll do that for her, too.

who bets that riz will not talk about any sad feelings in front of his friends this season!!! anyways that was so goddamned long, because I'm crazy about riz. the rest will be way quicker

anyways no one except ME is reading this. haha.

fig:

so, I'm fully convinced that gilear and fig swapped lucks. the sour, curdling feeling? very gilear yogurt. also the kicker was icing on her shirt. real yogurt moment there. and with all these kisses of fortune gilear's getting, I'm convinced that's what's happened for fig. very interested to see how that messes with her coolness

I'm also really interested in fig actually taking bard classes. i do have to wonder how it might go... I know emily like, does music, so I wonder if any of her knowledge there might come in handy

also very interested in seeing how any of the aguefort quangle stuff is gonna mess with things this season! even the little bit of ayda we saw was so good.

kristen:

so, like, obviously, cassandra's not doing so hot, because they've only got two followers. i think it's really interesting how non-pressuring they are towards kristen because like. for all the pestering they don't actually seem to outright mention that they aren't doing so great

also kristen seems in a pretty bad place this semester, but I'm hoping that the stark reality of expulsion is actually going to make her think about like, getting her life together. i'm really interested to see where it'll go because like. i dunno. i'm not much of an evangelizer myself.

more than tracker being away, it must sting additionally that like, apart from being in a possible breaking up state, tracker, right now, is being the like, perfect cleric. like she is reforming and adding nuance to her faith and stuff in a really really big way!! which is the kind of achievements kristen should be doing. but you know. they're world saving and things are... they're pretty tiring. (must've been nice talking about the moon goddess during eternal night, i bet)

ragh is also back and i'm so glad bc i love ragh. also 100% that red crystal lydia barkrock's been dealing with is gonna be relevant. i really hope that he has somewhat of a presence this season because like, he was around in fhsy, but ragh's like... idk, he's cool, and I feel like he's rich enough in character that he's got places to go?

adaine:

loved the little aelwyn mention. that nemesis abjuration is such a deeply aelwyn way of looking out for her sister

i am really excited to see adaine trying to get a job, personally. and i do hope we get to see more of zayn darkshadow bc he's just a really chill and nice minor npc in my opinion

fabian:

i love fabian's parents as equally as i hate them, and this scene exemplified it. they like... give him things, and look after him, but they're not really... supportive, are they? in an emotional way. no time to talk, and he's 18 now, so they're totally fine leaving him alone for months. they can be the cool parents that let him throw awesome parties. and hallariel saying it's a great thing to be his father's son... I don't know, bill seacaster's like, kind of a shithead?

so that'll be interesting. and he wanted to go to dance camp...! i hope he really does get to explore that passion more during the school year. truthfully i have to wonder how his grades are... riz and adaine are doing great, fig and kristen are doing terribly, gorgug is probably not the greatest considering his rage, but fabian? I'd be interested in knowing what's up with that

also they don't directly answer whether they're taking all the staff iirc, but judging by how hallariel mentions that food is just set up with an account, it may be that he can't even like, talk to cathilda or anything. which sucks!! it really does suck.

gorgug:

in some ways, zelda and gorgug breaking up was a little anticipated. still, it does suck. but it's not like he really had the time for anything

i wonder how this interacts with the timeline of the seven: that's in her junior year and sam seems to still refer to gorgug as zelda's boyfriend, and stuff, so I wonder if it's a retcon or I've got the timeline wrong or that I haven't quite finished actually watching the seven. anything could be fine--personally I think gorgug and zelda work really well as solo characters, so like, who knows

edit: in the AP brennan said zelda graduated so the events of the seven have likely already happened... that does bring up the question of why things dont line up but like. i can handwave time shenanigans in my head. especially with the quangle.

could be kinda fun if gorgug and ragh bonded a bit more this season.

thistlesprings are great parents, of course. love that they offered to fix the hangvan, or work on it together, and I'm really hoping their supportive energy is gonna help gorgug out this year. i have to wonder if there's gonna be any strangeness with gorgug meeting any of the thistlespring extended family, now that they're hosting this festival

speaking of this festival, it's the same one that sklonda's working a case related to!! i want to get my claws into this mystery so bad

ok that's about everything. gonna watch the AP now! my final thoughts... it's so frustrating that these bad kids have saved the world multiple times over and done so many things, and it's not like... enough, not even close. but that's a very real thing I felt during junior year of high school and that I'm sure many people felt--that I'd spent all this time developing myself as a person and becoming better and doing some pretty interesting stuff, in my opinion, but when I put it all out on like a resume or a college application or whatever, it looked like nothing. even though it was absolutely meaningful and important, it was nothing.

#kiri.txt #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #fantasy high #d20 #i feel so weird tagging this bc no ones gonna read this. but the tags are so i can find it. lol #in this essay i will #liveblog

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aspecpplarebeautiful · 1 year

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Sometimes I just get so lonely. I think I crave physical affection, cuddling, hand holding, things typically associated with romantic couples, but I’ve never been attracted to anyone like that. It’s just, it’s like when you want a snack but you just stare at your pantry bc nothing sounds good, so, dejected, you close the door and pretend you never really wanted a snack in the first place

It always comes out of nowhere too. I’ll be fine as long as I don’t focus on myself, but the second I think think too hard about how I actually feel, it hits me likes truck. Like I’ll be watching a sweet show, like Heartstopper for example, and I’ll be so happy because it’s so heartwarming, but underneath there’s a melancholy. It feels like I’ll never have someone that makes me happy like that.

I almost want to ask a friend if they’d want to do these kinds of things platonically, but the only friend I feel close enough to lives in a completely different state, which isn’t exactly helpful on the physical touch front. And I’m so scared for my future, I live in an extremely conservative area, and I plan on attending a college known for its…less than diverse demographics (something like five guys to every girl, made more complicated by the fact that I am neither). It doesn’t feel like I’ll ever meet someone I feel comfortable doing these things with.

I’m just so lonely but it’s hollow. I miss something that I might never fully experience. It’s like mourning something that never fully existed in the first place. Why don’t I deserve the things that make me happy?

-🪐

You definitely deserve things that make you happy, Anon. It sounds like you're in a rough place right now, but you're not always going to be in an isolated place like this. It doesn't hurt to start planning now how you're going to get out of it though.

Even in conservative areas you can still find your people, and still make meaningful connections. And you will eventually have the freedom to choose where you live, and it will be good for you to have practiced skills around reaching out and meeting people now. Think about hobbies you like, or would like to get into. See if your college has an LGBTQ club of some kind (and if not, see if there's a local LGBTQ chapter that does events or meetups). Check out their other clubs too to see if anything interests you. There's a lot of advice around online on how to make friends, but the biggest thing is just finding ways to be around people consistently (especially the same people), and making sure you're actually talking to them and putting yourself out there.

You may be touch starved. There are coping mechanisms you can try like getting a weighted blanket (other suggestions in the link).

There are a lot of people who are very tactile and like showing platonic physical affection. Keep doing what you can to meet others, and mention that you're comfortable with touch and platonic affection, and eventually you will meet people who are platonically physically affectionate too.

All you can do is your best, Anon. But things aren't as bleak as they may seem.

All the best, and good luck!

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chirpsythismorning · 1 year

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What 'early breakups' are you even talking about? Steve and Nancy's? Lucas and Max's? Nancy and Steve broke up in an 'ambigious' way and it happened what? After the Party mess and when Nancy was drunk... so that did not exactly even happen that early into the season. Lucas and Max were broken up off-screen so they could get together.

They want Milvn to break up permanently in an unambiguous way, without any possibility of them romantically getting together while at the same time asserting their importance to each other on a personal sense with the show's narrative.

How's an early and quick breakup where El just goes 'i am done bye' does that, with the knowledge we have that El drew strength from Mike based on love, not hatred. The words 'Mike's hands were pulling her from her drowning' and other variations are not about El drawing strength from anger...

Sorry if you felt like I was calling you delusional. Pointing out that the almost entire fandom is willing to ignore canon narrative is not calling someone delusional it is just a fact. It's not even an interpretation.

We cannot expect to really expect anything going into S5 when the fandom almost consistently ignores canon and prefers to go by fanon instead. All the analyses then become heaaaaavy handed but very misguided expectations from an analyzing standpoint.

Yes all of those couples followed a somewhat similar pattern of breaking up early on. But specifically the Steve/Nancy/Jonathan love triangle is what I’m referring to.

In s1 they separated early on and the rest of the season Jonathan and Nancy were a focus, which allowed us to root for them the whole season, besides the beginning and end. In s2, they had their fight at the beginning revolve around Nancy not being able to say I love you, which allowed us to root for them for the rest of the season and followed by them getting together.

Mike literally refers to him and El’s fight in s4 as 'a fight that you can’t come back from', a fight that paralleled his sister’s fight with her first boyfriend, who she also ended up being broken up with after that incident, not years later, because we all know that that wasn't a fight you could just push under the rug and save for another time, it had to be addressed.

The thing is, the time jump for s5 is likely to occur early in the season, because the cast's age difference is something they don’t want to be too distracting. The earlier the time jump, the more they film stuff post time jump, accommodating to that age gap between s4-5.

So having Mike and El’s break up be midseason, means that’s Mike and El would presumably be ignoring all of the deep and very hard to ignore problems in their relationship, for those initial epiosdes, and then for another 1-2 years depending on how long the time jump is, which I just don't see happening. I don't see them putting on a show of a romantic relationship for much longer, and that's based on how S4 ends. For them to go from not talking and staying within at least like 3 feet of each other in those last moments, tells me that they're not going to be gravitating towards each other the way romantic love interests do, the way Mike and Will are doing at the end of the season in direct contrast.

I think holding off on it until mid-s5, is arguably even more ambiguous than what I would imagine is going to happen if it’s addressed sooner rather than later. Because that would mean them just awkwardly dancing around it and acting like it's not going to happen, even though we know it's inevitable.

Because Mike and El’s problems were highlighted in s3-4 in a big way. We saw how especially in s4 neither of them were being honest in their relationship. The romantic love there was lacking because neither of them were in it for genuine reasons, in terms of genuinely being in love and wanting to be together in a romantic way.

El craved normalcy bc she has always had so many things in her life making her feel different. Mike and his relationship with El is all he knows. And s4 made a point to build up just how impossible it is for them to keep this going and act like everything is okay when it’s not. Like did you see early s4, the fake sort of show they put on to act like everything was fine? Why would s5 be repeat of that? Why wouldn't they evolve that to show that their conflict is no longer something they can ignore, and instead convey that it was indeed a fight they can't come back from.

And I personally do not think that the break up is just going to be an 'I’m done, so bye!' scenario 🤣. Even if it was midseason, it wouldn’t be like that either.

It's a lot more likely that how El felt about their fight in early s4, and how she felt about his monologue, is going to at least be addressed and acknowledged in early s5, because the audience deserves that closure of knowing how El truly feels, with her being able to say it. Meaning that if they stayed together in early s5, we’d also need El in early s5 saying she loves Mike too and to actually resolve that conflict with her actually being able to even respond to it.

And with them breaking up and byler being endgame inevitable, I just highly doubt they’re going to play this game all over again, only to rip it away haphazardly.

She started the show barely being able to say a couple of words. And now despite the fact that she can talk and speak for herself, she hasn't been granted that affordance in the narrative. Instead her brother confessed her love for her, using all things that applied to him. If they wanted to give us El's genuine feelings about Mike, they wouldn't be identical to her brothers and given from him. That's just soooo sad and not fair for anyone in this situation and that's why it needs to be addressed.

We know she was upset with Mike calling her a superhero in their fight, we know that she looked at him with this frustration that he was still not getting it. That was like the climax of their fight in her room, with her looking at him with fed up determination, because saying something like that was the last thing she wanted to hear. And if anything, her experience at Nina, where Brenner told her she needed to fly and revealed that he used her to find Henry from the very beginning, how would Mike saying she could fly and she's his superhero, be something that provides her comfort, when if anything it's just a similar thing being expected of her, without her having any say in it?

The whole You're regressing Eleven is literally hinting at this idea that El is holding onto something in her life that is keeping her in the past, in a situation that makes her development sort of go backwards, and that is in large part highlighting her holding onto this idea that her and Mike are peak romance, despite the fact the that he isn't loving her the way she deserves. By staying with Mike despite knowing both of them are unhappy and forcing it at this point, is a huge regression to all of this build up leading to an inevitable separation, then being followed by them finally accepting themselves in each others lives without the obligation to be together because they met in the woods a few years ago and have felt this pressure to stay together ever since.

In their fight, she didn't want Mike to point to her powers as a way to deflect her genuine feelings about their relationship and her insecurities with him not being able to love her the way she wants, as a person and not as someone who can keep saving the day for him. And so how would him again saying she is a superhero, HIS superhero, suddenly be what she wants to hear in the end after everything she went through?

The problem with that moment in the script is that it's the only thing that is supporting the assumption she was happy with Mike's monologue. Everything else in the story goes against that. All of s4 makes it very clear that that was not what El wanted from Mike.

This is a big part of the reason byler makes sense, because they follow an I didn't say it/You didn't have to approach to love (show don't tell). Mike never should have had to say I love you for El to believe it. If it was something genuine between them, completely natural like breathing, El wouldn't have asked of it from him. But he made a point to struggle with merely writing it, avoiding it at all costs, making El feel even more insecure that there was something wrong with her causing Mike not to love her anymore. And the monologue didn't fix that.

You don't have to apologize but you also don't have to get upset and say everyone in the fandom is wrong, but you're right. If you truly believe that, continue to and leave other people alone. If people are on their posts saying how they feel and it upsets you, block them.

My problem is that everything leading up to byler, that makes it make sense, is at it's core what lead to Mike and El having conflict in the first place. And not addressing that and leading on Mike and El fans, for shock value isn't exactly good for the narrative. And it's never been good for the narrative which is why they like to address it early on so that we can move on to focusing on the pairing that they want us to root for.

Arguably, a break up before the time jump allows for byler to get together well after Mike and El separated instead of mere days/weeks. I would think with how much people are going to have a hard time with considering byler as it is, the time jump happening after Mike and El's break up would allow them to accept that Mike and El are for sure done and have been done for a while, and Will isn't some rebound because Mike is feeling insecure and he'll just be with him the second him and El end things.

How I imagine a mid-season 5 break up is that it would be even more ambiguous than an early one, because it would require El and Mike to ignore their problems for five episodes when there really is no reason to do that with how obvious it was that their fight was a fight that you couldn't come back from. And addressing that is what will allow us to watch El actually experience closure on screen and then be able to focus on Max and working with everyone to beat Vecna. If the whole audience is watching at the edge of their seat being led on the whole season that Mike and El have a chance of getting back together, they're not going to be able to focus on El's arc as an individual character, bc they're going to be waiting for Mike and El to make up and be together.

But then when it doesn't happen, and they've been led astray unnecessarily even more than the previous 2 times, we'll only have a mere 4 episodes to build up them being a platonic pairing with it being blatantly obvious that the audience needs to accept it AND that we need to accept Mike and Will being romantic.

Whereas with an early s5 break up, by episode 3-4 we will know that they are not together and can focus on the new conflicts that have arose from the final season, because dragging on stuff that has already been heavily built up in s4 as being a problem, just to give us the most obvious anti-climactic outcome halfway through in the middle of all the new storylines they are focused on, would fall flat.

Mid-season is likely going to be made up of Mike and Will having a substantial amount of time alone. That's something that those early break-ups allows, so that we can have that development for them that is necessary in order for them to be endgame. Arguably as Mike and Will are going through that, El isn't going to be around to break up with him.

If anything I could see an early s5 breakup, with the audience being aware of it, but not Will. This would mean that Mike and Will's interactions could still be interpreted as romantic comfortably, but we would see for the first time Mike pining and Will still assuming that Mike could never feel the same, until maybe mid-season he finds out that they are indeed not together.

I can't subscribe to the monologue when all of the conflict leading up to it makes it abundantly clear that isn't what El wanted to hear. And we would see in mid-season 5 that El is just going to end up saying all of the stuff we already knew. She's not stupid. She knows that something is off with Mike, that was the whole point from the beginning. That inner struggle he is having is even more heightened and made obvious by the fact that Will was what encouraged Mike to say I love you in the first place. She heard all of that. And then she proceeded to ignore them at the cabin.

How s4 ended is not at all giving the impression El is going to start s5 by gravitating towards Mike and looking to him for comfort, it was actually the direct opposite.

If I were to subscribe to the monologue being a convincing love confession to El, at that point I'd rather Mike and El just stay together instead of holding off even more on facing the truth about the conflict of their relationship that didn't just get fixed by the words I love you. I'd rather byler didn't end up together if Mike is just stringing El along to inevitably choose Will over her anyways at the last minute.

I do think that I love you is what El thought she wanted to hear from Mike, but not like that. And it would be a disservice to her character to have the focus be on her hoping he might choose her for any longer, only for him not to.

If a bunch of people are interpreting the show this way, then there's a good chance that they could be right. We were right about byler being endgame and all of our reasoning is supported by the conflict that has been building up for seasons, and that love confession that paralleled to El beating Henry in 79', doesn't look like one rooted in love, whereas that first face off was. Mike's monologue was bathed in red, El's memory of her birth bathed her in light.

Will on the other hand is bathed in light from Mike's perspective, most prominently at the end of s4. That wasn't in the script, does that mean it's not important? Almost all of bylers moments aren't in the script, does that mean everything about them means nothing?

Feel free to subscribe to whatever you want to. If you end up being right you can say I told you so and live with that satisfaction! Personally, if I'm right, I won't feel the need to come and say I told you so, bc it's not about some sort of vindication for me. I don't even plan on doing that to redditors bc they're going to be dealing with that enough as it is. I'd rather them just insist we're crazy right now and let it all unfold and let the show speak for itself. If I have to subscribe with everything they think bc of the scripts, then I'd be pretty bored rn because all of the evidence for byler would essentially mean nothing and they're just being put together for no reason. All of that lead up meant something, otherwise their endgame wouldn't be satisfying, least of all if El is once again being framed as waiting for Mike to choose, only to not choose her this time. She deserves so much better than that. They all deserve better than that.

Will on one hand assuming for a little longer that Mike doesn't feel the same merely drags out the mutual pining leading to that endgame. El assuming for a little longer that Mike does feel the same is just making her plot regressive for no reason when she could be finally getting that independance arc, truly separated from being linked to Mike in a way that prevents her from truly progressing and knowing her worth and living up to that authentically.

We'll have to wait and see. But I don't see the use in coming in other peoples inboxes and directing your dissatisfaction with their interpretation of things as contradicting yours and so they need to just drop it and subscribe to what you think or else...

Everyone on here can interpret things how they want since there is still a season left and everything is still up in the air. If you want to blow off steam and say your piece on your profile, then do that and if other people resonate with it then that's great! You don't have to force other people to involve themselves with your narrative. If people are doing that to you, you have every right to block them because you also shouldn't have to have people in your inbox saying that your interpretation of things is wrong.

I'll continue to analyze and break things down as I choose. That's not stopping anytime soon. And IDK why you would want others to. It would be pretty dead on here if we all just stopped and believed everything we've been told superficially despite everything we've been shown contradicting that. If everything we're being told is all there is to it, you could argue byler isn't even happening. But most of us can agree that isn't the case.

I hope you can continue to analyze how you view things and embrace your interpretation instead of tearing others' down. We still have two years left, let's not make this more unnecessarily unbearable than it needs to be.

#byler #st5 speculation

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