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whyareyouhere66 · 2 years

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Haikyuu Characters as Quotes From My Life

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Basically, this chapter is just some of the Haikyuu characters as quotes that me, my friends, and even some of my classmates have said. Yeah, it's simple as that. They don't really make sense *the quotes*, even with context so yeah lol.

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-*-* "Christian Grey may be 50 shades of fucked up- but I'm 50 shades of 'I'm gonna whoop your ass" -Kuroo

-*- *"I think I have a crush on Pennywise." -Tanaka

-*-* "If only men had brains and balls, at the same time." -Kiyoko

-*-* "No Im not gonna eat my cat, I'm not a cannibal." -Nishinoya

-*-* " I look like a warthog and have the personality of a she-devil." -Yamamoto

-*-* "See, I told you Megan, my boobs are getting bigger." -Asahi

-*-* "Do you have gum in your pocket or are you just excited to see me?....I think you're excited to see me." -Oikawa *to Iwaizumi, most likely*

-*-* "Tell me a good song- and we're not listening to the trolls soundtrack." -Ushijima *talking to Tendou*

-*-* "If I write my essay about Fortnite and global warming what will I get?" -Bokuto

-*-* "I once had a guy walk up to me at target and he was like 'wanna buy some ball wash?'" -Terushima

-*-* "Ryan Reynolds is hot." -Ennoshita

-*-* "Jeff Bezos would be a great drug dealer." -Kenma

-*-* "Ugh that's nasty....gonna give us fricking herpes..." -Akaashi

-*-* "HE HAD TWO GLIZZIES" -Bokuto

-*-* "It looks like pennywise could crawl out of that things butthole." -Hinata

-*-* "I just got winky faced by Kahoot." -Tsukishima

-*-* "I'm gonna get fax paper, and make cards that say "we give free bj's" and tape it on peoples doors." -Kuroo

-*-* "If I have to listen to another minute of JoJo Siwa I will lose my mind." -Daichi

-*-* "YOU CLOSED MY DUOLINGO TAB?!" -Nishinoya

-*-* "Can any orgasms so photosynthesis...?" -Kageyama

-*-* "My shoulder is no longer a virgin." -Yamaguchi

-*-* "Don't change, we hate you just the way you are." -Iwaizumi

-*-* "Mom can you leave so I can curse at my friends?" -Sugawara *talking to Ukai*

-*-* "We thought there was cum in the bathroom." -Tanaka

-*-* "I don't like purple, I like ducks" -Hinata

-*-* "The bible is not smut, bitch." -Kenma (I'm sorry if anyone finds this offensive-)

-*-* "Mort I cannot 'move it move it' anymore" -Yamomoto

-*-* "They kill pears- that's why it's so sad. But pineapples stay alive, pears just- die!!" -Bokuto

-*-* "Not gonna lie man but your toes are...dry." -Tanaka

-*-* "That's like going up to a police officer holding up a bag and going, "hey can you step outside for a minute, go down and get some coffee, I should be done in about 15 minutes?" -Kindaichi

-*-* "I swear to god I will turn this- this navy blue van around!!" -Daichi/Ukai

-*-* "Nah he's got little-man-itis." Tsukishima *talking about Hinata, ofc*

-*-* "Don't we have a leader in the real world?" *Bokuto, continue to next quote *

-*-* "Yeah we've got Michael Jackson." -Kuroo *that one was a 2-parter haha*

-*-* "YOU'LL BELIEVE GOD IS A WOMENNNN- is that vodka??" -Nishinoya

-*-* "It's probably like, burnt fire or something." -Oikawa

-*-* "Why do you not like shirtless men." -Tanaka

-*-* "I'm gonna start a petition to make Boston a continent....or maybe New Jersey." -Hinata

-*-* "We've known eachother since the 1800's- we went to Travis Scott concerts with George Washington." -Tanaka *talking abt Yamamoto*

-*-* "Dame cabeza" -Tanaka

-*-* "No one likes Jacobs, Jacobs are ugly and raspy." -Tsukishima

K great, so anyways-

Idk that's all I got rn, y'all got a free glimpse of my strange friends and even stranger school. Hope you enjoyed and adios

edit: holy shit this blew up a lot faster than I expected- thanks so much y’all

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #bokuto koutarou #tsukishima kei #kuroo tetsuro x you #akaashi keji #hinata shōyō #nishinoya yu #tanaka ryuunosuke #daichi sawamura #sugawara koushi #kageyama hikaru #oikawa tōru #ushijima #tendou satori

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devilsurvivor-2-recordbreaker · 5 months

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Why the fuck am I doing all this shit just to go through in debt to take another decades worth of education to work a pointless job to just barely make enough money through life destroying work and barely stay afloat financially to die a painful and depressing retirement

If 100 hungry people need to eat but 1 guy who has all the money demands they work to be worthy of eating table scraps the 100 hungry people should be allowed to kill that guy. What are we doing anymore, capitalism is a total failure. We should kill Jeff Bezos.

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ambiguousdisorderken · 1 year

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actually animals Want to die !!!! that's why they reproduce in the first place, silly! not like we breed them into existence purposely to satisfy a demand that's killing our planet and making us sickkk. and we humans Need the mammary secretions of a different species to have strong bones but drinking human milk past our infancy is ridiculous!! Yuck!!unnatural ✌🏼also animals Need us to survive even though they lived their full natural lives before industrialized human intervention and this is totally normal(((: the circle of life!! survival of the fittest. oh, yes yes those screams of agony pain and fear in slaughterhouses?? that's totally not a living ,sentient being fighting for its life, because we kill So Humanely. id love to be killed like that, actually. THE COMPASSION, id kill my cute pet like that too..! so to Save Animals– because I loooooOve animals, i eat them in every meal and I think about them😔 rip all the chickens that died for the bucket of chicken wings im not even gonna finish i guess. And then, THEN i say all these things online because it's so fun shitting on a social justice movement simply because it's non-human-centered😍, i'm so very much superior to these vegans who are literally only capable of caring about 1 thing, not like the rest of the population, who can experience more than one feeling and fight more than one cause, like me. all vegans are white, even self-declared poc vegans)) i hate elon musk and jeff bezos and i'm a cool leftist oh i'm so punk xD slavery is freedom, marx mvp!!

#i swear i cannot take antivegans seriously. do yall hear yourselves????#vegan #im so mad at the rampant willful ignorance running that dominates this shitsite #oh and i cant wait for the mean vegan bitching

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dat-is-chill-ghafa · 3 years

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#thank you Jeff #fuck that shriveling pathetic piece of shit #I hope someone poisons him #jeff bezos #jeFfrEy bEzoS jEffRey bEzOs fucking die #eat the rich #why didn’t we make him stay in fucking space #jeffrey bezos #space #leftism

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actualsunflower · 4 years

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how the fuck can you have enough money to end world hunger and house the homeless and still have plenty of money left over and then just fucking. not do it. disgusting.

#sorry im livid right now #i spent almost my entire teen years in a homeless shelter begging for food and this shit is just fucking vile #how can you KNOW children and innocent people are starving and freezing and burning to death and just fucking turn around #disgusting #i will PERSONALLY eat the fucking rich #personal #jeff bezos fucking die challenge

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weedle-testaburger · 5 years

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me: look i don’t just wanna murder everyone who i disagree with politically

fascists seeking to commit hate crimes and legitimize genocide:

conservatives trying to restrict womens’ and minority rights and constitutionally entrench their regressive bullshit values:

far-right populists constantly scapegoating immigrants and legitimize xenophobic bullshit:

neoliberals treating their employees like absolute shit and refusing to let them unionize:

the majority of people across the world just standing by and letting this happen, if not actively voting for people who do this:

me: ok yeah i kind of really, really fucking do

#personal crap #political crap #i don't fucking want loads of people to die or society to collapse #i just want neoliberalism and social conservatism and fascism to die a death because they're bringing the world to breaking point #and everyone's either going on about how we need a revolution on tumblr or twitter or voting for bigoted shitheads!#I JUST FUCKING WANT THIS SHIT TO END #although tbh i think my priority isn't 'eat the rich' it's 'eat the far right'#i think we need to funnel away money from people like jeff bezos and elon musk #but people like trump farage bolsonaro etc. legitimately deserve to die

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dungeonqueering · 2 years

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2021 Be Like

JANUARY

Bean Dad

Storming the Capitol

Impeachment 2

Reality Shifting Draco Malfoy Murder

Parler Hacked

Sea shanties are BACK BAY BEEEEEE

Inauguration outfits

BERNIE'S MITTENS

Militant Vegan Lady Tries to Bully Children and Gordon Ramsey

Executive Orders

Reddit Kills Hedgfunds with GameStonks

Politician openly believes California Wildfires were started by Jewish Space Lasers and somehow isn't removed from office for blatant antisemitism

Lady Dimitrescu,,, lady.... Tall

FEBRUARY

EEBY DEEBY

The Queen doing monarch shit on the DL

India Treating Farmers Very Badly

I promise I'm not a cat lawyer video

Trump Acquitted even though 57 / 100 voted against him.

Texas has no power, Cruz flies to Cancun for a vacay while ppl die

Rush Limbaugh dies, crab rave

WE LANDED PERSERVERANCE BAY BEE

Daft Punk retired. :(

Texas Freezes Over, Cruz goes to Florida this time.

March

Texas lifts mask requirements

Biden bombs Syria instead of helping people.

Dems pass the $1400 stimulus. No republicans support it, they could have included anything in that bill and the GOP couldn't have stopped them. They CHOSE to make it less.

Harry and Meghan on Oprah drag the royal family

NFTs enable art theft

Stimmy Time

The Pope says Catholics can get the J&J vaccine only if it's the only one available (it has stem cells)

Anti-asian hate crimes in Georgia

EverGiven runs aground in Suez Canal

CALL ME BY YOUR NAME (Montero)

Shrimp Tails in Cinnamon Toast Crunch

EverGiven freed six days later.

April

Prince Phillip dies, crab rave

Mars Helicopter Ingenuity

ON 4/20 THEY CONVICT DEREK CHAUVIN ON ALL COUNTS FOR MURDERING GEORGE FLOYD

May

This is the May

Israel somehow being EVEN WORSE to Palestine.

An oil pipeline company's financial systems are attacked, so they can't properly charge customers. They shut off the pipeline rather than risk anyone getting free gas. People put gas in plastic bags.

Israel now attacking news organizations.

CDC lifts mask recommendation foolishly.

Legendary children's author Eric Carle passes away.

June

Pride Discourse AGAIN

Annakin and Padme meme

Batman isn't allowed to eat pussy because "Heroes don't do that"

People are surprised the FNAF guy is a republican

Derek Chauvin sentenced to 22.5 years

John McAfee dies in a Mexican prison, where he was for tax evasion. It looks mildly sus, but Crab Rave.

Britney Spears fights her Conservatorship

July

TSR is back and they're transphobes

Britney Spears loses her fight. :(

Bill Cosby released from jail.

The Olympics are being HELLA racist. Banning swim caps for natural Black hair, banning two Black women for their natural testosterone levels, and banning one Black woman (who may very well be the fastest woman ever) because she smoked weed one time (in a place it's legal) to deal with the fact that an interviewer told her her mom had just passed away.

Ocean is literally on fire because a pipe broke.

Oh btw Israel is still doing human rights violations and denying vaccinations to Palestinians.

Catholic run Canadian and american residential schools found to have hundreds of bodies each of indigenous children taken from their parents to be indoctrinated into white society. As of July 2, 1505 at 7 out of 504 schools.

Right wing protests in Cuba

Olympic anti-sex beds

Popeye the Sailor, Nonbinary Icon??

Steam Deck (100k pre-orders)

Lmao Tumblr thinks we'll pay for premium content. Cute. Love that for them.

Australia hires furry artist to draw furries to promote the Olympics.

Texas puts $10,000 bounty on anyone who helps anyone get an abortion.

Chuck Tingle got DMCA'd for music on Twitter

Cleveland changes baseball team name to not be so racist

Jeff Bezos goes to space and, unfortunately, survives

Blizzard employees (and Activision employees, Blizzard's parent company) threaten to walk after it's revealed that, unsurprisingly, the company treats women like shit up to and including a culture of assault.

Frito-Lay workers end 20 day strike with inches gained.

August

Delta Variant of Covid is 'as contagious as chickenpox'. Mildly vaccine resistant, but still mostly affecting the unvaxxed.

Chrischan arrested on... Look, don't worry about it. Don't look it up. She did a very bad crime, leave it at that.

Idris Elba is gonna play Knuckles?

QAnon guy murders his family

Federal board of education decides to enforce masks in all public schools for '21-'22 school year.

Britney Spears' dad is gonna step down from her conservatorship maybe?

Taliban starts taking over Afghanistan

Places are probably going to shut back down due to Delta Variant not being taken seriously.

Governor Cuomo of New York steps down over sexual harassment allegations. (Fuck him)

OnlyFans getting rid of porn.

OnlyFans backs down obvi

Hurricane

By Talos this can't be happening

September

The Supreme Court refuses to see case about Texas abortion bounty.

ABBA releases new music

Ford Germany makes gay trucks

There Are Many Benefits To Being A Marine Biologist

Steve from Blue's Clues gives us all closure.

Suez canal blocked again (but only for a few hours)

Bongcloud chess move

MET Gala outfits, discourse (unfortunately)

Lil Nas X's first album, Montero

Nicki Minaj's Cousin's Friend's Balls

Epik, far right web hosting service, hacked. Embarrassingly weak security.

Gabby Petito goes missing, found dead.

Elvira comes out, has had a girlfriend for 19 years.

Chris Pratt cast as Mario for some godforsaken reason

Grimes and Elon Musk break up

China bans cryptocurrency

DnD 5.5e announced

Britney Spears' dad removed from her conservatorship, it's now run by an accountant chosen by Britney

"I can't believe you've done this." Taken down from YouTube after 14 years. Owner disputes. Denied. Heavy social media backlash gets them to manually re-allow it.

October

Grimes does stuff for attention I guess.

Facebook goes down briefly.

Squid Game

Dawn's Kidney Donation

Twitch breached massively.

Even bigger breach than the Panama papers shows what we already been knew. Pandora Papers.

Dave Chappelle actively a transphobe. People somehow forgot about his bigotry from, like, 2 years ago.

Alec Baldwin kills a cinematographer in an accident involving a gun firing blanks. Proper safety checks weren't done because of non-union being hired by the producer... Alec Baldwin.

Margaret Atwood makes a bunch of transphobic posts.

Brian Laundrie's remains found in Florida.

Kat Von D's anti-vax Nazi ass moving to Indiana

Facebook changing their name to Meta, Mark Zuckerberg shelf Barbecue sauce.

Marilyn Manson converting back to Christianity thanks to Justin Bieber and Kanye West???? Probably to deflect from him being outed as a sex pest tbqh

November

Zillow algorithm buys too many houses, record losses for the company, fires 25% of staff.

Turns out Meta is already a company and FB failed to buy the rights, so Meta is doing legal action against FB.

The IRS to start requiring NFTs report transactions over $10,000 just like they do for cash. Crypto Bros freak out

Travis Scott concert gets people killed (not of COVID)

Mercedes Lackey thinks trans people don't belong in fantasy

Brittney is free!!

Kyle Rittenhouse trial.

The Queen's New Phase

Kyle Rittenhouse ruled not guilty despite going to a place specifically hoping for violence.

Hillary Clinton-Kin fanfiction on the NYT Best Sellers

John Deere Strike doubles their raises among other successes

NFT Pirate Bay Funged the Tokens

Omicron Variant.

December

Ponder the Orb

Gen Zers on Reddit use algorithms and effort to crash Kellogg's website with bogus job applications , thereby preventing scabs from applying.

Ben Shapiro's sister tries to slut shame Madonna by comparing her to Nancy Reagan. Turns out Nancy Reagan was PROLIFIC at oral sex while working in Hollywood. Trending #throatgoat #superhead

Kellogg trying to hire scabs going VERY BADLY

Giant Tornado kills factory workers forced to keep working at 3AM directly in the path of the tornado despite the company knowing the dangers

Anne Rice died, AO3 goes wild

Kellogg strike ends, workers get a pretty good deal!!

Tumblr censors stuff in a very bad way.

Betty White dies. :(

#long post #improved the spacing #also #I made this as the year went including anything I thought notable #obvi I missed shit because I am one person but #I hope it gives some perspective on how much happens in a year

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parismemes · 2 years

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SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AN ARGUMENT THAT GOT OUT OF HAND.

“windows are doors though just so we're clear” “windows are just mini doors if you really think about it” “the WORLD is against you, ___” “if you have to claim things that aren't doors are doors then you admit your argument is weak” “you were ABOUT to argue that rotating locks are wheels dont even deny it dont even try to deny it” “the waters have been chummed--” “YOU CANT JUDGE THE STRENGTH OF MY ARGUMENT WHEN YOURS IS BASED UPON FALSEHOODS” “look windows are basically like those doors cut in half where its separate and you can swing the top or bottom open independently” “ohhhh LOOK AT THAT, you’re using OUTSIDE SOURCES to win an argument. typical” “NOT THIS SHIT MY COWORKERS HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS ALL DAY” “the bees are buzzin!” “also would you count a door twice since it goes two ways or just once” “Windows are doors because I can climb out one” “literally going to climb out my window tonight now” “literally opening and leaving through my window as we speak” “you all are horrible human beings“ “Because I climb out my window door? U can’t take my window door from me” “oh so we're horrible because we're correct” “there is no winning, only chaos!” “don't think you can exclude yourself, you're not an exception” “ok but fruits dont have blood, ___.” “i said fruit juice is the EQUIVALENT OF BLOOD. FOR THE FRUIT” “dont make me bring the kool aid man into this again ill do it ill go there” “hey guys in unrelated news do you think if you turned the kool aid man upside down it would look like a jellyfish a little bit” “fruit juice is NOT equivalent to blood because the fruit does not circulate it” “yeah his fruit juice is jiggling out of there” “KOOL-AID IS NOT FRUIT JUICE” “god i love it when the kool aid man looks like a jellyfish” “IT IS AN ARTIFICIAL BEVERAGE CREATED BY CAPITALISM IT IS NOT FRUIT JUICE” “what is capitalism if not the FRUITS of labor” “capitalism is the EXPLOITATION of labor, it is the exploitation of the fruits and therefore not the fruits itself” “fruit juice is literally also the exploitation of fruits” “the literal point of fruit is to be eaten so that the seeds can be shit out somewhere else” “youre exploiting the fruits for their juice. how does that make you any different than jeff bezos” “i will have a debate about that” “if power corrupts then is capitalism not inevitable, just like fruits?” “power isnt inevitable in and of its self its all a societal construct and therefore man-made” “dolphins don't practice capitalism.” “ok and? humans do and we've got so much history to prove giving someone too much power? is bad. just like. giving someone too much fruit juice. will kill them” “boom bitch eat my kool aid jellyfish” “no i think theyre pretty similar :)” “just because i could probably die from an insane amount of orange juice does not mean that everyone will die from any fruit juice.” “you can die from too much of literally anything that doesn't make it capitalism” “no those are the same thing” “Capitalism deez nuts” “thats like me saying "trees are kind of similar to broccoli" and you replying "OH SO TOMATOES ARENT FRUITS THEN THEYRE JUST SIMILAR TO FRUITS HUH"” “not all windows fit the criteria of doors. but when they do. they ARE doors”

#i only come on here to post stupid shit and disappear for another several months (hello my loyal following)#rp memes #rp meme #ask memes #ask meme #sentence starters #crack

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mangosmemes · 3 years

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CAPYBARA SHENANIGANS

Collected quotes from the RPC Development Tea Room Discord Server! Feel free to change wording/etc to fit your muse.

(Name), you wouldn't be you if you had chill.

I'm hoping Glitz is like glam rock. Jazz with more glitter. Like a hair band.

It sounds like they've named their dogs using one of those 'what is your porn name?' memes.

sorry sir, you're asking for services that come with the girlfriend package, & you're currently subscribing to the fringe benefits deal, please talk to me about an upgrade

this has backfired tremendously

leaves splayed out like a professional on a porn set's casting couch

my next life, make me a fuckin houseplant

I have moments where I brain goodly

I’m a houseplant with more complicated emotions

But I’m a coconut ho

If you tell me they made you cry, I will burn down their house with them in it, & I will never forget they did that.

I regularly say Mercury is in Gatorade to fuck with people

and at some point I realized that I was in too deep

get your capybaras we got so many of em. ya want a sleepy one? a caffeine addicted one? how about an angry capybara, an angybara if you will

So edible undies, but made of cookies instead of fruit rollups?

where's that cookie underwear, i need to eat my feelings

you're not allowed to charge me with murder again

THREE TIMES I'VE BEEN ACCUSED OF MURDER WHEN IT WAS MAN-SLAUGHTER AND YOU KNOW IT

Well i guess setting yourself on fire would wake you up

DON'T THINK UNPURE THOUGHTS ABOUT WINNIE THE POOH I SWEAR

I came back to some weird shit

I felt my entire ass loosen.

Cows care not for hygiene

I think IHOP might be where hope goes to die, and I say that as having been in many an IHOP at 3am

life is too short and i choose violence

DID YOU JUST COMPARE ME TO THE BUG'S LIFE RIDE IN ANIMAL KINGDOM?

She is a ship, He's a canal, Can I make anymore obvious?

It’s your fault I’m gay as hell so it must be your fault everyone else is too

the feral part is most accurate

send in the bitchslapping raccoons

you don't gotta be old to be a cryptid

stop trying to kill people

I feel like I was rickrolled by a pet site.

grand theft horsey

jeff bezos; not even the first dickhead into space, but probably the first flying in on one

YOU SHUSH YOU SHITSTIRRER

May I remind everyone that they have the ass of a frog

what emotion am I depicting?? fuck around and find out

just because you read it in a fanfic doesn't mean its a good idea

That information makes sense but I don’t like it

The heat wave has turned me into a part time nudist i swear

this isn't twilight

But most importantly, hotter than Satan's asscrack in a lava bath, so not a viable option

I will push your pin

#dearindies #rp memes #rp starters #sentence starters #member submission

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metalheadsforblacklivesmatter · 3 years

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Lower class white people keep shitting on Black and other BIPOC people. They keep thinking they're better than BIPOC people. What's worse is they think their struggles are most closely related to that of multi-billionaires like Elon Musk than they are to the struggles of BIPOC people.

What they don't realize is the government views all of us lower class as the same. They don't give a shit about poor white people any more than they give a shit about BIPOC people.

White people were starving during the pandemic, and the government somehow figured out how to get them to blame Black people because of their protests and chronically ill people because they would literally die from the pandemic.

The government didn't want to fork over the money to help these people, so they figured out a way to get the low income white people to blame other groups that are literally the same situation as them, if not a worse situation.

The government has tricked these people into thinking they're Jeff Bezos, they just haven't gotten there yet.

All because the government "couldn't afford to pay" these people.

Now watch how quickly the government will "find" billions of dollars for rich white people with 7 summer homes that costs $100mill each. Watch how quickly they'll save these people trying to figure out which yacht they have to sell.

Because if these hedgefund billionaires get bailed out while Biden days they can't give us $2k. We should be pissed.

We should all be pissed.

Stop fighting with every minority that big businesses point the finger at, and realize that the real enemy is the asshole pointing the fucking finger at everyone.

White people. Black people protesting for their right to breath isn't hurting you. Chronically ill people protesting for their right to be protected from a pandemic isn't hurting you.

What's hurting you are these bitch ass billionaires with hundreds of billions of dollars acting like they can't afford to pay you during a global pandemic. What's hurting you is these piece of shit billionaires that keep convincing the government that it can't afford to pay you to stay at home, while the government is literally giving them billions.

Know who your enemy is and fight the power. Eat the fucking rich.

-fae

PS: We should support minorities even if we're well off, but the point of this post is to point out how the government is using the ingrained racism of poor white people to keep them in the fucking ground. Racism is just another tool the 1% uses to keep us white people "in our place"

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doctorguilty · 3 years

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God like that reminds me of that time I saw people on this site unironically being like, die if you have 30k in your bank account youre rich scum, and I'm like....... 30k can't buy a house... 30k wouldn't pay off my student loan debt... 30k will be gone in like, a couple years (being optimistic) if that person stopped working, people have NO concept of how money works or who the "rich" is when we say "eat the rich" like they think a couple grand is enough to retire on or something. Like there's defs privileges that come with having 30k saved versus living paycheck to paycheck but that doesn't make them even a sliver closer to like jeff bezos and shit PLEASE get some perspective

#seth speaks

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fishmongeringstudies · 3 years

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ten things my mother doesn't know

one: why i bought the fila's. she knows i bought them and she knows i bought another pair last week but i never told her why i was up at one in the morning to begin with, why my finger slipped on the button and i hit buy instead of 'do you want to block this number? yes'. i never told her about the boy who laughed and said 'i love your new shoes'. how his own shoes were old and stained with paint. how his eyes were the kind of blue you want to eat. how i lost my appetite days later.

two: i wore the same shirt for three days in a row. to be fair, we were in the negatives all week and it's not like you can really feel your skin when it's that cold out and your room has a mini-fridge for a heater, but she would've wrinkled her nose at me anyway. how can you live like this, she'd ask, holding the shirt out at arm's length like one would a child. are you okay?

three: my hair was gross on my first night at college. i had a bottle of body soap but i'd forgotten to buy shampoo and conditioner at my friend's place over the weekend and it had been too heavy to pack into my suitcase. it only dawned on me long after i'd left everything familiar behind, rummaging around in my belongings like a man possessed with a bitter dream. standing under the running water while a stranger hummed to themselves in the stall farthest from mine, three weeks' worth of anxiety itching to be dragged out of my ugly airplane-matted hair, i wanted to stick my face in the snow until all my skin froze off. i felt like a failure and wanted desperately to cry. but i didn't. i didn't do anything.

four: asparagus makes your pee smell weird. for three months i thought i was going to die constantly and then one day someone was like you know how asparagus fucks with your pee and i was like asparagus fucks with your pee? and they were like yeah. it's the acid in that shit. like real acid. like, you're normal, dude. you're not going to die.

five: why i bought the second pair of fila's.

six: why it took me thirty minutes to find the sim card she'd 'packed in the carry-on suitcase, probably in the blue bag, it's not that hard to find, you know'. it was, though. it was real fucking hard to make myself go back in there.

seven: because i wasn't okay. not even close. because i took a nap this afternoon and in my dream i left the door to my room open and he invited himself in, looming over me in that big empty space and asking in that horrible paper-plate voice: why didn't you tell me you left?

eight: because i never left. because not enough of me left. because it took me three months to realize that when you fly across the ocean for college it'll take you forever and five days to re-assemble the mirror-shards of your existence and that's okay, and you're going to do some really stupid shit before you remember who you are and that's okay, you're going to fuck up so bad. but that's okay. even if you aren't. even if you have all this hurt and no idea what to do with it, who to give it to, how to make the art on the wall look nice again so you can invite people to sit on the sofa.

nine: hey, mom, did you know? i kissed someone. i kissed someone and i hated it. hated them, too. hated everything that led up to that moment and everything i pretended to be for the weeks after that, hated the fact that i let myself get so lonely, hated how the hair on my arms stood on end whenever the battered old thought crossed my mind and i wanted to grab my toothbrush and rake it down my tongue until every cell had been scraped clean off. sometimes you think a city is the answer and then you get there and everything's on fire. sometimes you're the fire. sometimes you make shit burn. all i ever wanted was for someone to love me as much as i loved myself, but it turns out i'm full of love. it takes a lot to match up to that. so far no one's tried very hard.

ten: here's what i want out of summer. first of all i want to learn how to make egg rolls. to do this i'm going to buy a square frying pan and to buy a square frying pan i'm going to go to target tomorrow with a friend. if there aren't any square frying pans then i will order one from amazon. if jeff bezos sends me another pair of fucking bathroom slippers i will beat up one of the metal railings outside this building and make one myself. after that i want to read a lot of books and learn about a thousand ways to turn the universe into a string of text then i'll tell a lot of good stories. it doesn't matter what format they're in, if i'm writing a poem or caterwauling into someone's face from six feet away. maybe i'll even start a podcast that i'll forget about after three episodes and return to, years later, when i'm older and wiser and better at cupping light between my palms. maybe i won't. maybe i'll learn to skateboard. i tried to learn how to skateboard in december before the world fell apart, but then the world fell apart, so i never did get very far. even now, i'm still standing in my old bedroom, you know? you can't see me but i'm searching for old ticket stubs on the dresser table; i'm rearranging the books on my shelf. i'm writing you a letter.

ten: i wasn't okay for a long time, mom. but i'm trying to be, and this podcast i've started listening to is really funny and keeps making me cry at unexpected moments in the story, and this room is so bright it hurts my eyes to look up, and summer looks like the kind of girl you want to fall in love with and who'll grind one pretty kitten-heel into your heart, so you'll have to forgive me for the mess.

i'll clean it up later. i promise. just let me put these shoes away first.

05.30.21

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deeplord · 3 years

Text

IGHT WELL.. i finished cyberpunk. nd i think i got what the game considers to be the “bad ending”?.. i played a streetkid v whose first real friend ever was jackie then takemura, both of which got taken “by the city” alongside a myriad of misc. friends & fam throughout her child. a real rapscallion of a kid that felt the first flicker of hope thru jackie fuckin welles and his big leagues dream

all this to say, i rly liked her dynamic with the aldecaldos and panam!! so OBVIOUSLY i chose to do this whole catharsis bit in which she Finally lets herself lean on someone, she Finally releases the helm a bit, takes charge, tells johnny sorry but fuck off this is my meat suit, ive spent my whole life hating this meat suit and the shit hand ive been given by this city but its the one thing it cant take from me

so i chose v & aldecaldos ending, all that about v becoming part of the aldecaldos was great, loved that

but... everything with johnny felt so pointless? LOL mb i just didnt understand all the silly scifi tech talk but like... all that shid with alt just sounded dumb ngl

i guess i really wanted an ending where v could keep johnny? i didnt rly like him myself but my v felt he was kind of a paternal/brotherly figure at that point. i think she’d feel rly alone, in her head, after that

AND THEN SHE JUST HAS TO DIE ANYWAY? and her beefy cop bf river dumps her at the end? but im happy shes finally leaving that wretched vile ass city and i guess thats all i coulda hoped for

anyway someone tell me if i chose the “”””wrong””” ending, spoil away. i dunno if ill be replaying yet!

more thoughts on the ending below lol, critical warning tho

bruh im just disappointed. they really hyped up this entire “down with capitalism and big corp” angle, this real delicious “eat jeff bezos” vibe, and i had so much fun developing v to be a hardcore survivalist doesnt give a shit about whatever personal vendetta johnny has against big wigs into a diehard anti-capitalism(anti-arosaka? w/e) probably only exactly 6 notches less than he is himself, only for it to fall so fking flat in the end lol. i deadass thought we would blow up arosaka tower 2.0 but nah we can either flee the city and the cycle of corruption continues or we fuck off into cyber lala land and the cycle of corruption continues

#and side note #its rly fking sad to me that the 'big leagues' jackie always talked about #turned out to be just one big ol family FAR away from that cursed city #man im sorry but that characters death hit me in a way i have...not ever been hit before #it stuck with me through the WHOLE GAME #i called him all the time i thought about him all the time #checked on mama welles and misty ALL THE TIME.#something about That character man.#cyberpunk 2077 #v #p #long post //#YES my art blog is part live gaming part personal it be like that sometimes.

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blossom-hwa · 3 years

Note

Okay I'm super sorry if I'm requesting too many things but I was listening to holiday music while driving home from work yesterday and was suddenly struck by the need for some chaotic holiday/winter shenanigans with the boyz, if that's okay? Reader involvement isn't necessary! Pretty please and thank you sooo much ❤❤❤ -🌻

You’re not requesting too many things don’t worry Sunny!!! I literally owe you everything for half the fics I’ve written in the past year so there’s no way I could refuse, also this is what the drabble game is for!! I hope you enjoy this half-baked bullshit LMAO

3-year anniversary drabble game: send me an NCT/WAYV/Stray Kids/The Boyz member + a prompt (check out the post for ideas) and I’ll write a drabble for you!

(don’t think I've mentioned it but all of these text aus are in the same universe lol)

(also this ended up not being as holiday-ish as you probably wanted.... SORRY)

Title: Holiday Shenanigans

Pairing: no pairings, just the boyz being dumb

Triggers: a lot of cursing

quick clarification:

papi: sangyeon

angel: jacob

moon scribblez: kevin

new kid: chanhee

starbucks tissues: changmin

sundae: sunwoo

bread: younghoon

the better hyun: hyunjae

the better jae: eric

professional rollerblader: juyeon

foodie: haknyeon

new kid: I'm going to commit murder

sundae: who’s he making empty threats about this time

new kid: IT’S NOT AN EMPTY THREAT

moon scribblez: who wants to hear about the cockroach that fucking crawled out of my mop today!!

papi: pls don’t tlalk about it I was scarred for life

moon scribblez: IT’S YOUR TUTORING CENTER IT’S Y O U R FAULT WE HAVE A COCKROACH INFESTATION

papi: it’s not an infestation Kevin

new kid: is no one going to pay attention to my murder

angel: I will! but I won’t be an accessory

moon scribblez: I BEG TO FUCKING DIFFER

moon scribblez: THAT THING WAS HUGE IT WAS MORE LIKE A SPIDER JFC

new kid: I love you jacob

moon scribblez: IF I SHAKE THE FUCKING MOP TODAY AND COCKROACHES CRAWL OUT I’M QUITTING MY FUCKING JOB

angel: love you too <3

sundae: /barfs/

papi: #1 sunwoo just bc you’re allergic to emotion doesn’t mean the rest of us are

papi: some of us are capable of love

new kid: JI CHANGMIN ISN’T

papi: #2 I don’t own the center I'm just the center director therefore I do not take responsibility for any possible infestations we may have

starbucks tissues: I heard my name :D

new kid: sTOP FUCKING TERRIFYING ME WHEN I’M JUST TRYING TO WORK

new kid: IT’S ALMOST C H R I S T M A S HALLOWEEN IS G O N E

papi: therefore take it up with the owners @ moon scribblez

starbucks tissues: but it’s always halloween :(

moon scribblez: I TOOK THE MOP TO THE SINK

moon scribblez: PUT IT THERE AND TURNED ON THE FAUCET

moon scribblez: A FUCKING BROWN SPIDER-LOOKING COCKROACH BITCH ASS C R A WL E D OUT

moon scribblez: AND YOU WON’T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY??????????

papi: I just deal with the parents and the kids not bugs

new kid: it is NOT ALWAYS FUCKING HALLOWEEN

new kid: IF YOU WANT TO CELEBRATE

new kid: CELBRATE C RH SI T MA S

moon scribblez: time to pin it on ella

starbucks tissues: :(

sundae: now look what you’ve done chanhee

sundae: you’ve made him sad

new kid: I GOT TERRIFIED BY A NUN MASK AND YOU CARE ABOUT IF H E’ S SAD????????????????

starbucks tissues: :(

angel: I think I'm going to head out

angel: I don’t think even I can heal this rift

moon scribblez: well if jacob’s out I'm out

moon scribblez: I have a solution to my problems

papi: just don’t get me involved

moon scribblez: no promises !

starbucks tissues: I can scare ella if you want kevin :)

moon scribblez: YES FUCKING PLEASE

papi: I'm going to get fired

moon scribblez: maybe so :D

new kid: no one cares about my problems I see

new kid: everyone hates me

sundae: ya it’s bc you’re the new kid

new kid: I exist only for pain

bread: so hyunjin told me to tell changmin to stop using various horror movie masks to terrify him at work

starbucks tissues: so out of work is fair game?

bread: idk he didn’t specify

bread: probably

starbucks tissues: :D

the better hyun: oh what the fuck this shit isn’t normal

the better hyun: it’s impossible for someone to be so cute but so terrifying

starbucks tissues: I'll take that as a compliment :D

the better hyun: it isn’t but whatever makes you happy ig

the better jae: changmin

the better jae: I only ask that you leave the nun mask and chucky doll at home when we have our christmas party

starbucks tissues: well that’s no fun :(

bread: changmin I'm sorry but your idea of fun is very different from ours

bread: Jacob back me up

angel: I'm sorry changmin but he’s right :(

starbucks tissues: :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

the better hyun: by the way for the party

the better hyun: who’s doing what???????

the better jae: I'm bringing the xbox!!

foodie: I'm bringing cookies !

papi: I'm cooking with Kevin and juyeon

professional rollerblader: yes it’s going to be fun

professional rollerblader: Kevin says he’s going to make a cheesecake

the better jae: can I save a piece for jisung??

moon scribblez: if we don’t eat all of it

new kid: why

new kid: why did I just hear screaming from the tutoring center

moon scribblez: oH MY GOD SANGYEON

professional rollerblader: TAHT WAS GLORIOUS

sundae: what happened

foodie: why do you only show up for chaos

sundae: I only exist for chaos nothing else is worth my time

the better jae: fair enough

angel: what happened? I thought I saw someone fall ??

angel: but I'm across the walkway so idk :(

angel: is everyone all right?

papi: I think I have a concussion

moon scribblez: oh please you just fell off a tiny stepladder

professional rollerblader: can’t believe sangyeon just fell off a stepladder trying to put up a fucking Christmas stocking

papi: I hate christmas

papi: I hate everything

moon scribblez: the kids are laughing

moon scribblez: I think I'm going to bust a lung

papi: my dignity has been stripped and I no longer want to live

the better hyun: wait juyeon why are you even there

the better hyun: you don’t even tutor

foodie: ‘does she even go here’

the better jae: ‘does she even go here’

foodie: ERIC

the better jae: HAK

sundae: oh wow amazing their brain cells conjoined into one single coherent thought and of course it had to be a mean girls reference

starbucks: how did this start out with younghoon telling me to stop scaring hyunjin at work

bread: honestly I don’t know

moon scribblez: winter break is upon us

moon scribblez: and I can now bask in the fact that I don’t have to teach spoiled rich assholes basic math for two whole weeks !

papi: speak for yourself

moon scribblez: your fault for being center director

angel: I hate to agree with Kevin and be mean but you really did bring that upon yourself sangyeon

papi: want death

professional rollerblader: no don’t die! we need your food for the party tomorrow

papi: can’t believe all you care about is my food not even me

sundae: did you expect anything different

papi: on a regular basis no

papi: but it’s the holiday season

new kid: holidays are a social construct made to force us into the world of capitalism and giving our money to fat fucking corporations like amazon

starbucks tissues: if I could give Jeff Bezos a heart attack with my nun mask I would

new kid: that’s the only use of that mask that I approve of

starbucks tissues: turn around

the better jae: was that

the better jae: was that new

bread: I don't think I've ever heard chanhee scream that loud

foodie: I’m at the food court and I heard that what the fuck

foodie: the build a bear is like all the way down the mall what the fuck

starbucks tissues: :)

bread: I think that scream rivaled changmin’s dolphin levels

sundae: brb still dying of laughter

sundae: I'm so happy I caught that on video

new kid: Kim sunwoo

new kid: don’t you fucking dare

sunwoo: [ 1 video attached ]

new kid: someone’s dying tonight

professional rollerblader: I can’t believe I missed this I'm so mad

foodie: I think the fake Santa Claus looking over in abject horror just adds to it

starbucks tissues: ^^^

new kid: someone’s dying tonight

angel: there there

angel: no one’s dying tonight

new kid: someone IS

new kid: AND NOT EVEN JACOB CAN STOP ME

the better jae: bet changmin’s mask can

new kid: I'm ripping that fucking mask to shreds

starbucks tissues: :(

bread: now he’s hugging the fucking mask like it’s his baby

bread: [ 1 image attached ]

the better hyun: as I have said before

the better hyun: it is not normal for someone to look that cute while holding a fucking horror movie mask

papi: I've come to accept that none of you are normal

papi: I think it’s best for your sanity to accept that too

moon scribblez: I'm so late but I'm also rolling on the floor with laughter

papi: can confirm he’s actually on the floor

papi: Kevin you give our center a bad name

moon scribblez: I deadass do not care

moon scribblez: you gave me ashley today so I'm giving you chaos

moon scribblez: suck it <3

angel: she can’t be that bad?????????

moon scribblez: Jacob I know you’re an angel

moon scribblez: but you don’t understand

angel: I guess I don’t :/

foodie: I'm going into a food coma!

foodie: don’t attempt to contact me for the next twenty four hours peace <3

sundae: we wouldn’t have in the first place

foodie: :(

angel: sunwoo don’t be mean :(

sundae: fine

sundae: sorry hak

foodie: :)

new kid: the power of one Jacob bae

starbucks tissues: he prevents wars with just his smile

bread: all hail the angel

the better jae: *bows*

angel: guys pls

moon scribblez: no they’re right

moon scribblez: he took me home last night when I was drunk off my ass

moon scribblez: a true angel

angel: guys pls I'm blushing :(

papi: can confirm ! I'm sitting next to him

papi: also he made me hangover soup so can confirm the angel bit too

professional rollerblader: honestly if Jacob wasn’t here we wouldn’t have survived last night

professional rollerblader: he de-escalated Mario kart

professional rollerblader: stayed sober

professional rollerblader: took people home

foodie: all hail Jacob bae

the better jae: I thought you were in a food coma?????

foodie: came back to pay my respects to our lord and savior Jacob bae

the better jae: ok valid

angel: g u y s

the better hyun: has this conversation just become an all hail Jacob bae conversation

moon scribblez: do you want to fucking argue about it

the better hyun: no on the contrary

the better hyun: I'm joining

the better hyun: alL HAIL JACOB BAE

papi: amen

moon scribblez: aMen

professional rollerblader: a fucking men

angel: I'm going to start crying guys pls

new kid: NO DON’T CRY

starbucks tissues: Jacob don’t cry :(((((((((

angel: you guys are so sweet I can’t not cry

papi: I'm hugging him now no more crying

the better jae: two bros, chillin in a hot tub

the better jae: no feet apart bc they’re secure in their masculinity and love each other very much <3

moon scribblez: FIVE FEET APART BC THEY’RE NOT GAY

moon scribblez: fuck

the better jae: YOU RUINED IT

the better jae: yOU BITCH

professional rollerblader: didn’t Jacob call us sweet like one minute ago?

new kid: well he’s an angel he sees the best in us

sundae: there’s no best in you bitch

new kid: oh fuck you

bread: great way to end the holiday season ig

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