#early sunsets is my favorite song

[mieux-de-se-taire]

Early Sunsets over Monroeville - MCR Interviews

89.5 WSOU FM Interview - 7/11/02

14:12-15:33, 20:21-20:32, 21:20-21:28, 21:47-21:51

Interviewer: Do you think that added to the performance, that you had to actually get through the pain? Gerard: For Early Sunsets Over Monroeville, definitely. I was in-- It was like, I don’t know like 10-- 9:30 at night. We were just getting ready-- It was the last song we did for the day, and I was in so much pain. And I just-- you know Geoffy [Geoff Rickly] was like, “Alright, let her rip.” Interviewer: That’s the mellow song, right? Ray: Right, that’s the-- what’s awesome about that too is the last, I think it’s like the last 3 minutes of that song is just one take, no edits, no stops, no cuts. It’s just...It’s an amazing performance by-- by him and just by all of us, I think because we-- we wrote that song like a few days before we went into the studio. It wasn’t finished when we recorded it, so it was just us, you know, kinda letting all of us [unintelligible], you know? Interviewer: (Overlapping) It was your studio song. Ray: Right, we wrote it in the studio. Interviewer: Well since we’re hyping this up so much... (Ray laughs) We might as well play it ‘cause everyone out there’s going “Wow, sounds like a great song.” Ray: Hopefully Interviewer: “I wanna hear him crying.” (Ray and Gerard laugh) “I wanna hear that tooth.” (Continued laughter) So, I guess let’s go into a little bit background of the song, and then we’ll play the song for everybody, and everyone can hear. Gerard: Okay, Mikey does not want me to reveal-- Interviewer: He’s going “No! You’re out!” Gerard: (Overlapping) what the song is about, but if you-- there’s plenty of clues in it, so if you figure out, it’s-- I’ll say it’s about a film. Is that enough? Ray: Yeah, that’s good. Gerard: Okay, you can figure out-- Ray: (Interrupting) Horror film Gerard: Alright. (Pauses then laughs) You messed it up! (Arguing in background)

Interviewer: What are some of your favorite songs off this record to play live and actually-- or during the recording process? Ray: Um, I think recording process-wise, definitely “Monroeville.”

Frank: (Talking about his favorite songs) And “Monroeville” because I had no clue what I was gonna do. (Interviewer laughs) I wrote it in the van before we recorded, and I had like frostbite on my fingers so it kinda sucked.

Mikey: I like the “Monroeville” song. (To Gerard) It was fun watching you tweak out at the end. (Gerard laughs)

/

Noise Theory Interview - 11/13/02

Page 1, paragraph 5

Interviewer: Even though ‘My Chemical Romance’ as a band have been together only a short time, the album displays some excellent and mature song writing skills. Were the album songs written after the band became complete? Ray: We started in October 2001, and had written 5 songs by January 2002. This was when the band was still a four piece. The rest of the songs came together a few weeks before we went to record. Honey This Mirror and Early Sunsets were written about a week before we left for the studio. We asked Frank to be in the band around the same time, so to get his input on those songs really helped them become what they are.

/

HardcoreNJ Interview - March/April 2003

Paragraph 3

Interviewer: What was the inspiration behind "Early Sunsets Over Monroeville"? Matt: Musically there wasn't any inspiration, 2 days before the recording I happened to be strumming an acoustic guitar in our practice space, and the guys all seemed to like what I was playing (which is a rarity). Anyways, we knew we wanted something different on the record to reflect our softer side. I think it was the most magical part of recording process, seeing a 2 day old song kinda just work, we didn't even have an ending for it. We all just jammed it out improvising. Oh, and the vocals were inspired by a certain movie...

/

89.5 WSOU FM Interview - 7/3/03

8:25-8:31, 8:59-10:27

Interviewer: Alright, so, we’re gonna hear “Monroeville.” Ray: It’s a slow one. Grab your girl...and then shoot her in the head. (Laughter)

Interviewer: I remember a long time ago when you were recording this record that you had a problem while you were singing this song. Gerard: Yeah, I had a hole in my tooth and an abscess in the hole, and it was pushing against all the nerves in my face, and it looked like I had Parkinson’s, and it was (a?) drag, and it-- Interviewer: And your face was droopy, and-- Gerard: It was drooping, and I looked like a-- I went to hospitals the whole time we were recording, and they thought I had facial nerve paralysis, nerve damage, so I had to do that song, like basically with, yeah like the most intense pain and half a face. (Dramatically) Half a face! Interviewer: So, alright, everyone listening out there, now you know he did this song with half a face. Gerard: (After a pause) Half a face. (Laughter) Interviewer: How did you feel about the song after you played it? I know you must have been like, you know, “This can’t be the best I can do” because you’re all messed up and stuff. (Ray protesting in background) Gerard: It felt like that, but (Unintelligible as Gerard and interviewer talk at the same time) when I was doing it, but everybody was so psyched on it when I did it-- Ray: Psyched! People were crying-- Gerard: They were crying man (Laughter) Ray: It was amazing. It was the most amazing, definitely the most amazing-- Matt: (Overlapping) Yeah, we were definitely a bunch of wusses. Frank: Alright, correction, not a bunch of wusses. Ray and Otter (Matt) cried. (Laughter) That’s what happened. Ray: No no no, I will definitely say I-- Mikey: The red sea might have been parted when my brother did that part. Ray: I cried. I think Alex [Saavedra] might have shed a singular tear. Interviewer: A singular tear? Ray: It was definitely some crying going on. (Matt talking in background) Gerard: (Overlapping) I got a hug after that one Ray: (Overlapping) It was bad. Gerard: (Overlapping) I got a hug. I got lots of hugs after that. Interviewer: (After a pause and laughter) Alright, so how’d you feel about the hugs afterwards? Gerard: The hugs were sweet. (Laughter in background) The record was sweeter.

/

Punk It Interview - 10/29/03

Paragraph 28

Sev (Interviewer): What are some of the biggest disagreements amongst yourselves? Gerard: We mesh really well musically and personally. We all have a good time, so there's probably not that many disagreements. The only thing I think we ever disagree upon is if we're going to play "Early Sunsets Over Monroeville" or not. We had a little thing tonight. Some guys wanted to play it tonight, but I'm not sure. It's an ad lib song - the first verse was written, but the last part of the song was freestyle. And I'm not fucking Eminem, so unless the vibe is right, I don't like to do it. I did it in Chicago because the vibe was perfect. It basically happens in the middle of the set. We feel the energy, and if they can deal with it, we can deal with it.

/

Life On the Murder Scene - 2005

31:24-32:01

Ray: And Frank played on 2 of the tracks off the first record, and one of them was “Early Sunsets Over Monroeville.” (“Early Sunsets” begins to play) Ray: He just plays some great, great parts. Frank: (Cuts to different interview) When we were doing “Monroeville”, Ray was laying down his parts, and as soon as he was done, I took the parts that they had recorded into a van, that had like no heat, outside the studio and wrote what I was gonna play. Ray: (Back to first interview) A lot of the melody that he plays during the verses and the choruses is just, you know, absolutely beautiful, and I think really makes those songs work.

/

Barcelona Live Stream - 3/5/11

6:10-6:34

Ray: (Reading a live chat feed) Ooh, would you ever play “Early Sunsets”? Frank: Oh, we have (turns to Ray while Mikey speaks in the background) this tour? I don’t know. Ray: I can’t even remember the last we played that. Frank: I think it was in Chicago. Ray: Yeah? Mikey: (After a pause) Oh yeah, we played it in the Metro. Gerard: (Unintelligible as multiple people speak) like “The End”? Frank: Yeah Ray: That would be a cool one to revisit. Gerard: It was a cool-- I think especially if we give it some structure at the end like, ‘cause that was the problem with playing that song. It has no definitive ending, like it kinda just keeps going and going.

/

Kerrang #1376 (alt) - 8/10/11

Page 3, paragraph 11

Interviewer: I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love” was released in July 2002. What do you think of it now? Ray: You can hear the nervousness and excitement. Every song speeds up which gives them a lot of character. I like the rawness, especially in the vocals. It sounds very true. I get emotional, too. Early Sunsets Over Monroeville is unlike anything we’ve ever done since -- it’s amazing.

/

Where Are Your Boys Tonight? (Chris Payne) - 2020-2022

Chapter 9, page 113

Geoff Rickly: When we were in the studio, Gerard’s wisdom teeth were really hurting him, and he wasn’t able to sing, so he went to the dentist to have them out and afterwards they gave him a bunch of painkillers. He didn’t sing with the fire or the venom, so Alex took the painkillers away from him. Like, “You gotta sing in pain, fuck you! You gotta feel it!” I was taking the painkillers, watching him sing the record. I remember lying on the floor and coaching him through how to sing “Early Sunsets Over Monroeville,” the ballad on the record. I was saying, “You’re following the music, make the music follow you. More intense! The music will catch up to you.”

#mcr #my chemical romance #i brought you my bullets you brought me your love #bullets #early sunsets over monroeville #interviews #song interviews #i didn't mean for this one to take this long #whoops! #i'm nearing the end of bullets now #so hopefully i can get the next few done quickly #but i'm so happy to have finished this! #early sunsets is my favorite song #so it's just super interesting to see what they say about it #sorry if anything is wrong or missing for the video transcriptions! #sometimes it's so hard to tell what they're saying #especially mikey

[satansfarmant]

someone take early sunsets over monroeville away from me. this song literally just throws me back to germany and that’s a no from me <33

like?? does *anyone* notice? does *anyone* care?

and also: does *anyone* notice there’s a corpse (me) in this bed?

#early sunsets over monroeville #i forgot why this was one of my favorite songs ever #it’s the relatability methinks #rachel fm #mcr

[cedarbranch]

I hate you so much /j /s. WHy do you dO this???

They're just,,, so goOd. I am SOBBING - /hj

(I'm rereading a bunch of your GerryMichael fics because I saw My Chem live and I can no longer think straight.)

BLESS... somewhere out there magnoliaverse!gerry is seeing mcr and losing his fucking mind. he hears mama live and is going so hard he almost passes out. HOPE U ENJOYED THE SHOW U LEGEND I CANT WAIT FOR MINE THIS FALL

anyway this ask immediately prompted me to go back and reread some of my favorites of my own gerrymichael fics and then start writing, so i once AGAIN have to thank u for giving me motivation juice <3

#me: i miss wandering eyes 'verse. i should call her. *opens sequel doc* #(proceeds to not work on it and instead add 2k to agnes fic) #agnes is also at the mcr show btw. #actually thinking so hard rn abt what their favorite songs would all be #like mama is a Very Obvious choice for gerry but like. he would have so many deep cut faves too #like death wish and boy division live would annihilate him i think. and would go crazy to vampire money #with agnes i think a lot of her faves are ones they havent played yet but if they DO end up playing early sunsets.... killer #also sleep #i was just abt to type that i'd literally write a oneshot of them all going to the show #and then i realized that that'd be like a crossover event with my own fic-writing history. OOPS #anyway thinking about all the tma fic ideas i abandoned.... they deserved better #archivist!michael au and time travel au i still love u baby im so sorry #me having tag rant of the century over here instead of going to BED #answered

[localdiscountgoth]

listening to arms length is so haaaard

they write the most heartbreaking and raw lyrics and they’re so fucking good but christ i cry whenever i listen to them. I they pierce my heart and soul on another level

FUCK

#i might be a masochist #i have a thing for heartbreaking raw songs that wound me #my favorite my chem song is early sunsets over monroeville #arms length #never before seen #never again found #everything nice #they’re building a solid fanbase and im gonna be be insufferable about being an og fan #never before seen never again found

[writerracha]

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ when you're spaced out — skz moments

↻ 1.5k (150-200 per member) :: established relationships :: mostly fluff. kissing, domesticity, mention of working out. a bit suggestive at times, but no smut.

↻ 18+ mdni :: not proof read, pls be kind :: masterlist

↻ it's my first time writing reactions like this, so I'm a little nervous, I hope some of you guys like it. 🥺!!

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

° . chan

“Love?” You blink rapidly, turning towards Chan. He’s standing next to you, leaning slightly against the kitchen counter. “Are you alright? You’ve been washing the same plate for two minutes.” You look down at your hands, realizing he’s right. A laugh escapes your lips as you shake your head. “Wow. I just zoned out.” Chan smiles although you can see the slight worry in his eyes. “You’ve been working too hard. You need more sleep. How about we accept we’re getting old and go to bed early tonight?” You laugh again as Chan starts to help you with the dishes, drying what you’ve already washed. “Actually, I love the idea. But why are you helping me? You already cooked dinner.” you pout. Chan kisses your cheek. “I just like spending time with you, whether it be going on adventures or just drying dishes.” You give him a smile. “And getting to bed early?” He chuckles, nodding. “That too. Anything, as long as I’m with you, my love.” 

° . minho

It is only when Minho waves his hand in front of your face that you notice you’ve stopped pedaling on the stationary bike. You remove your earphones, catching his amused smirk. “Oh, don’t laugh at me,” you pout slightly. Your boyfriend leans against the bike, looking handsome in his fitted black workout clothes. “What were you thinking about like this? I hope it was me.” You shake your head in exasperation, starting to pedal again slowly. “It’s just this song. Reminded me of that time at the beach...” Minho chuckles. “So you were thinking about me.” You laugh. “Yes, but not in that way. Just at how great it was to be there together, watching the sunset.” Minho’s smile softens, and he steps forward to give you a long kiss. “We should go back there next weekend. Just you and me. What do you say?” 

° . changbin

You’re at a small party with friends. Changbin comes back to you after getting drinks to find you standing in a corner on your own, your eyes fixed on the floor, a sad expression on your face. He frowns with worry, approaches you slowly. “Baby?” he asks. When you don’t answer, he softly puts a finger underneath your chin, lifting your face so that your eyes align with his. You blink, coming back to reality. Changbin smiles tenderly. “Where were you right now?” Realizing you were completely spaced out, you chuckle and take the drink he’s offering you. “I have no idea. I started thinking about the work I have to do tomorrow, and…” Changbin slides an arm around your waist and kisses you temple. “Don’t think about that too much tonight. Tomorrow is still far away. Stay with me, okay? And when you feel like your thoughts lead you away, just squeeze my hand and I’ll bring you back.” You look at him, feeling so grateful for him. “I love you,” you smile, and he kisses you in response, clinking his glass against yours. “I’ll always be there for you baby.”

° . hyunjin

“Angel.” Hyunjin gently takes your hand in his, bringing you back to reality. You blush slightly, embarrassed at spacing out like you are. However, your boyfriend only looks amused, perhaps even enamored by your startled expression. “Is the food bad?” He asks. You shake your head, putting down your chopsticks. “No, the opposite, actually. So good I had an out of body experience…” Hyunjin lets out a sincere laugh, his eyes sparkling in the process. He’s brought you to his favorite restaurant for your weekly date, and you know it means a lot to him because he’s friends with the owner. “That good, huh? I ought to bring you here more often.” You smile, taking a minute to look at him. He looks like a dream with his long hair and white button-up. “I’d go anywhere with you,” you smile. “Especially if there’s good food.” He giggles, gesturing you to keep eating. You take a bite from your plate, humming in pleasure. “There’s nothing I love more than seeing you happy like this, angel,” he whispers, tenderness spilling from his voice. 

° . jisung

You jump in surprise when the television suddenly turns off, stopping the anime you’ve been watching. You turn to your boyfriend, who is sitting next to you, your eyes wide in confusion. He’s frowning, looking at you with concern. “Why did you turn it off?” you ask him. Jisung laughs. “I’ve been talking to you for two minutes but you weren’t answering!” You close your eyes, shaking your head, feeling bad. “Ji, I’m so sorry…” He takes your hands, squeezing your fingers tightly. He feels warm and soft. “Are you ok, baby?” You inhale softly, shrugging. “Just spacing out. I can’t focus on anything…” He leans in to stroke your hair, placing it behind your ears. “My baby. It’s ok, we can just cuddle if you want?” You almost want to tear up at his sweetness, and you nod. “I’d like that.” He smiles, pulling you in towards him so you can sit closer, bringing your legs over his, your nose buried in his neck. His hoodie smells so much like him. “Does that feel better? Just close your eyes, baby, get some rest.” He keeps stroking your hair, his breathing steady, and you feel safe there. 

° . felix 

You’re staring at the wall ahead of you, completely lost in thought. You came in the bedroom for something, you just can’t remember what. Suddenly, you feel two arms slide around your waist. Felix pulls you close to him, your back to his chest, and he puts a gentle kiss on your shoulder. That snaps you out of your daydream, but you just smile and relax against his body. He hugs you tight, his cheek finding a place against your hair. He smells good, his fingers interlocked against your stomach, his body warm and familiar. “I was wondering if you got lost,” he says softly. You giggle. “I came to the bedroom and forgot why,” you explain. Felix laughs and the depth of the sound is like music to your ears. It’s your favorite sound in the world. “Blankets,” he reminds you. “For our game night.” You sigh, turning around to kiss the tip of his nose. “Lucky I got you.” His eyes are wide and full of love, and the comfort of his presence is itself a blanket. “Now hurry up. I can’t wait to beat you at that game,” he grins. You scoff, nudging him playfully. “You wish.” 

° . seungmin

You stare up at the ceiling, breathless, a thin layer of sweat covering your skin. You barely notice Seungmin drawing the sheets over your naked bodies, making sure you don’t get cold. He kisses your temple, pulls your still trembling body to him. “Look at you, all spaced out,” he chuckles tenderly. You hear him, but you’re coming down your high still, your body getting heavy with sleep. It takes long seconds before you finally smile, brushing your nose against his skin. His hair is a mess, his familiar smell strong and intoxicating. “I think you just made my brain malfunction,” you chuckle. Seungmin grins. “That was the point. You deserve peace of mind, my love.” Seungmin has just made love to you passionately. It had been a while because you have both been busy, but the both of you were getting cranky, and having sex released the pent-up pressure. You’re so in love with him - the way he makes you feel, the way he takes care of you. He kissed you so deep, so slow, making sure that every muscle in your body relaxed. Now you just couldn’t think anymore - you felt calm for the first time in weeks. “You can sleep now,” Seungmin breathes in your ear. “I’ll watch over you.” 

° . jeongin

When Jeongin squeezes your fingers a little tighter, you realize you’ve been zoning out and haven’t heard what he’s just told you. You look at him apologetically, but he’s already smiling. “Spacing out again?” It’s been happening to you a lot recently. Too much on your mind, not enough rest… Jeongin tugs at your hand, bringing you closer, sliding an arm around your waist. You’ve both dressed warmly for your walk around the park, gloves and hats on. “Yeah, sorry…” You sigh, rubbing your eyes. “It’s okay, babe. We can just walk, we don’t have to talk. But I’m right there if you need to, yeah?” You nod your head, smiling at him. Your boyfriend is one of the best people you know. You can tell him anything, you know that - he will never judge you, and he gives really good advice, too. “I know, Innie. I know. I love you.” His eyes don't leave you for a second. "I love you more than words can say." You let your head fall against his shoulder, and the both of you keep walking, interlocked, the breeze against your cheeks.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

taglist: @lix-ables – @iwannabangchan – @yeongyulix – @xcookiemonsteer – @imtoooyoungforthisshit – @bbujiikseu [ please write if you want to be added or removed or if i forgot to add you (it happens) !! ] 

#stray kids imagines #skz imagines #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #skz reactions #stray kids reactions #skz fanfic #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fluff #skz fluff #bang chan fluff #lee know fluff #seo changbin fluff #changbin fluff #hyunjin fluff #hwang hyunjin fluff #han fluff #han jisung fluff #felix fluff #lee felix fluff #seungmin fluff #kim seungmin fluff #jeongin fluff #yang jeongin fluff

[thesecretsofthedivine]

Pick a Pile Reading | Messages From Your Future Spouse 💍🪐

Business Carrd 🍶🧺

Paid Services 🍇⭐

Tip Jar 🍾🎱

*Disclaimer: This is a collective reading - take what resonates and leave the rest. If this resonates with you, please show support by reposting (with credit), tipping, or booking with me! :)

*Exchanges with other intuitives/readers are available via dm's

──────

PILE 1 COLLECTIVE

• I love the sound of your laughter.

• You’ve turned me into a more carefree person.

• Let’s spend the day baking/cooking then heading right back to bed to cuddle!

• I feel like we could never have enough quality time together.

• You’re my favorite person in the world.

• I’m addicted to your scent.

• We should start a family (🐾/👶).

• You’re my lock screen.

• I tell all my friends about you. If you checked my notifications, all you’d see is a group chat roasting me for how obsessed I am with you.

• There is no place I’d rather be than here with you in my arms.

• I like to watch you sleep. You just seem so peaceful and still that it’s intensely captivating. I hope you don’t mind 😵‍💫.

~ miscellaneous: earth sign placements. homebodies. 2 introverts or an introvert & an extrovert. hard-working, masculine qualities in your spouse. wholesome domestic moments.

PILE 2 COLLECTIVE

• I want to drown in the sea of your existence.

• Dedicating poetry and art to you — my favorite muse.

• There is nothing in the world that I wouldn’t give to have more time with you.

• I’m afraid of loss/dying, but entering old age with you would make my existence complete.

• Please don’t leave me.

• Can I wake you up early if I’m craving your attention? It’s hard for me to contain my excitement when you look this beautiful/attractive.

• Let’s watch the sunset together and stay up late talking for hours.

• Every detail of your existence does not go unnoticed by me.

• We were meant to love each other in this life/I know that we are past life lovers who have found one another again.

• Come on, baby. Don’t be shy with me.

~ miscellaneous: water sign placements (especially scorpio or for their moon sign). 2 night owls or a night owl & a morning person. hozier songs. romantic moments caught on camera/posted online. artist x muse trope.

PILE 3 COLLECTIVE

• You light me on fire with desire.

• I love teasing you more than anything else in the world.

• You’re my best friend and lover, all wrapped into one.

• My heart feels warm and glows from the inside whenever you’re around.

• I can’t lose you. If I do, I’ll go crazy.

• Let’s go for a drive, listen to music, eat food, and forget about our worries.

• I want to be the first person you call when you’re in trouble.

• I will never judge you.

• We will travel everywhere and make the world our own.

• I want to surprise you with grand gestures (especially via gifts or shared experiences).

~ miscellaneous: fire sign placements. ready or not — bridgit mendler. sneaky smirks that make you smile uncontrollably. spontaneous memories or communication. fluffy hair & tan skin features for some.

PILE 4 COLLECTIVE

• Pulling out all my best jokes just for you.

• Give me a nickname and I’ll give you one back.

• How can I possibly deny your charm?!

• Your style is impeccable. Every time we’re in a shop together, I just want to watch you pose in front of the mirror.

• I’ll make you homemade snacks and share my family’s recipes with you!

• Spoiling you with acts of service.

• We don’t even have to speak to understand one another. Mere eye contact is enough.

• You bring out my (good) crazy side 🤪.

• I love how we can always bounce off each other’s energies so well.

• I wanna give you expensive jewelry or items with my initials on it.

~ miscellaneous: air sign placements. a quirky sense of humor. distinct eyebrows. friends to lovers trope (Monica & Chandler came to mind). latin/hispanic backgrounds for some.

#pick a pile reading #astrology #law of assumption #zodiac signs #astro notes #astro observations #birth chart #horoscope #natal chart #sun signs #astrology blog #astroblr #tarotblr #witchblr #psychic #intuitive #tarot reading #pac reading #pick a pile #collective reading #manifestation #affirmations #subliminals #spells #synastry #love reading #future spouse reading #soulmates

[bunny584]

For I Have Sinned ୨୧ Chapter II

“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.” Songs of Solomon 8:6-7.

As newly appointed Duchess-To-Be, you have much to learn. Etiquette, conduct and eventual motherhood are the pillars you are expected to live by. Because who cares about your choosing?

The Chapel, tended to by a mercurial Priest, is the perfect refuge.

…right?

Pairing: Geto x female reader

A/N: The is dedicated to the artist ( @captainsalsaa ) I mean look at our fallen Angel. His tears. His frustration. Dear GOD.

To the artist: I stared at your piece, then heard a specific song on my writing playlist then wrote the entire last scene in one sitting. To date, it’s my favorite scene in my author’s portfolio. I hope I did our fallen Angel justice. Thank you for creating this 🤍

Previous | Next

CHAPTER II: Hello, Father.

“Awake early, little dove.” 

Warm hands caress your shoulders. A welcome contrast to the chilly nautical dawn. The sun still has a ways to go, but songbirds have begun their wake up call. 

“As are you, Arella.” 

Your eyes float to your favorite maiden standing above you. No more than a handful of years older, but with a heart for you as if she raised you from birth. 

“It’s my duty to tend to you, is it not?” 

Soft laughter harmonizes with the nightingales. A quick kiss on your forehead before her warmth disappears off the balcony —  undoubtedly to go retrieve a treat of some kind. 

She’s not wrong. 

Technically it is her duty. 

But Arella is your blessing. 

Matting and kneading your surroundings to fit your needs. Eager to dampen the growing pains of settling in a new home. 

Constant hellos. 

Permanent smiles.

Not too wide, like a promiscuous woman. But not too tight, like a cold prude. 

Rooms to tour. Hands to shake. Garments to pin and tie and lace around your lungs as if your God-given ribcage was a frivolous extra not needed for life. Not needed to breathe. 

Breathe.

Your lids screw shut. Pulling in as much of the balmy, saltwater breeze gliding up the steep rock face along the overhang. 

Much like he did. 

The Chaplain. 

His hair cascading down his back in the same way poets monologue when inspired. His eyes a mural of what the Gods paint when they want to show off. 

The way earth acquiesces to his touch as if he is the Creator. The birds choose to perform for him every morning. And the ocean exists to bathe him. 

You cannot decide if the sorbet sunsets are created by the Chaplain. Or if the Gods fight over who gets the honor of painting him a new one each evening. 

“Sleep still escapes you, precious girl.” 

It does, but not for the reason she thinks. 

“You worry too much, Arella. I’ll adjust soon.” The tea she brought you is delicious.

The both of you cross back into your quarters. The stagnant, perfumed air suddenly suffocating.

“I would like to go to the chapel garden.” 

A quiet declaration that stills your handmaiden in her tracks. Then a small grin blossoms on her beautiful face. Fussing with your bedding. Wiping away evidence of your sleepless night. 

“For the flowers that bloom, little dove? Or for the God that tends to them?”

The blood in your veins runs subzero. 

“Arella! I am engaged to be marri—“

“Of course you are. But eyesight isn’t a sin.”

Another moment of feigned irritation before you burst into a fit of childish giggles. The both of you no better than school girls, covering your mouths, stifling your laughter. 

“I just wanted to see you smile.” Arella gestures to your extravagant dresser across the room. 

“In the second drawer you can find a casual garment. Come back with at least one hour to prepare for Mass.”

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

A hummingbird chaperones your walk to the church estate. Dulcet hums drown out the rattling heartbeat between your ears. 

This is harmless.

It is not a sin to take in Earth’s natural candy. To appreciate God’s gift to humanity.

In all of his majestic glory. 

Your eyes dart around as if your thoughts are a tangible scroll. Written in ink for the world to see.

Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no one around. 

Just you. Your fluttering companions (both heart and bird). The waking sun. God above and his plants swaying in the gentle gusts of wind. You’re safe in your mind. 

Until he decimates all logical and reasonable train of thought, that is. 

You should be angry. Infuriated. That no one adequately prepared you for seeing the demigod for the first time. Even now, you question whether he’s flesh and blood. 

Maybe an illusion? 

The Lord playing tricks from his throne? 

The mirage before you halts your paces. You can’t help but question your level consciousness. 

Because this must be a dream. 

“Oh, don’t be cruel.” 

Words slip out of your mouth, currently ajar. It’s not your place to chastise the One above, but come on. 

Your eyes taste the Chaplain for a second time and this course is even more decadent than the first. 

There he stands. 

A raven waterfall down his broad, muscular back. Half of it tied away from his face. Olive skin so rich the surrounding plants pale in comparison. Russet brown working pants hang loose around his tapered waist, but snug around his thighs. Various tools hooked in the belt loops. Heavy mahogany work boots match the worn leather gardening gloves fitted to his hands. 

His hands. 

Reaching for thorny vines plaguing his hydrangeas. Even at your distance you could detail each muscle fiber in his arm tense and release with every pull and toss.

Pull and toss.

Pull and toss. 

You would have gotten lost in his rhythmic trance, if it weren’t for the symbol branded in charcoal sprawling his back. The emblem peeks through his thick hair, every now and again. 

A spear? 

No.

A trident. With waves snaking up its stalk along his spine. 

His gravitational pull is overwhelming. Your feet move with more stealth than the King’s Guard.

“Working on the Day of Rest, Father?” Casual, measured. 

“Duchess,” Saliva pools in your mouth. His smile teases your ears before he graces you with it. 

“I have to start being more careful about my clothing.” A playful glint in his eyes. 

“Especially now that I’ve been blessed with a fellow greenskeeper.” 

He is a man of God.

And would never insinuate anything impure. 

But that doesn’t stop your cunt from clenching around his words steeped in a baritone potent enough to rumble the ground beneath you.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve sent word that I was coming.” 

“This palace belongs to you, Duchess. You are welcome here at any hour.” His hand captures a vine and tosses it into the pile without his eyes ever leaving yours. 

You are weak.

And greedy. 

The way your gaze drops to his arm. Desperately etching its contours into memory. Seconds, maybe minutes pass before you realize you were gawking. And the Chaplain just let you. 

Head cocked to the side. Soft smile ghosting his full lips. 

“Would you like to finish the tour of your new playground?” 

“Y-yes. Of course, please.” Stumbling over the uneven cobblestone in your voice, you turn away to begin the coordinated stroll. The Priest slides his arms into a linen button up. Lazily fastening two center buttons only. 

He informs you of the work that has already been done, what’s left. Where the soil is richest, where it is the most acidic. How the sun hits certain flowers at each hour of the day.

Brilliant. 

With complete command over God’s bouquet. The sun following him wherever he steps.

“Did you enjoy your swim today, Father?” Both you and the Priest come to a slow stop. One of his angular eyebrows raised.

“I’m dry, Duchess.” He responds with a low, hypnotic chuckle. 

Heat floods your cheeks. How could you be so presumptuous?

“What gave me away?” 

Your knees nearly betray you. The razor sharp grin on his face could cut glass. 

“You were born for the ocean. Or rather, the ocean was born for you.”

Your statement is greeted with blaring silence. 

Lava in his gaze. Singeing every part of your face it touches. His expression is like a foreign language. 

“I—I’ve overstepped, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend. Clearly I have much to learn about social graces.” A meek apology bubbles out of your lips. Desperate to fill the space between your bodies. 

The mercurial man shakes his head slightly. Thawed out from your statement, he reaches over and plucks a stray lilac petal resting on your crown.

“My father used to say the same.” He muses, looking away for the first time. 

“Your father! Is he—“

“He was called home some time ago.” This smile is soft. Reminiscent. Polite, but his mind clearly elsewhere. 

“Oh Father Geto, I’m so sorry.” 

A foot in your mouth is not enough punishment for your indecency. Why would you go prodding like this?

“Don’t be, I’ll see him again. Soon enough.”

“Not too soon, I hope.” The statement draws a stunned gaze from the Chaplain. Eyes dancing between yours. 

“Time to prepare for mass, little dove!” Arella’s melodic call tethers you back down from outer space. 

You flicker over to her with a ruby dusting over your nose and cheeks. Like a child caught with her hand in a cookie jar before supper. 

“Happy Sunday, Father!” Arella calls out, cheshire grin on her face deepening your crude blush. 

“Indeed, Arella.” He returns the greeting while keeping his eyes on you. 

“Send my regards to the Duke.” His voice lowers, for your ears only. With a nearly imperceptible edge to his tone. 

“Happy Sunday, Duchess. We have a counseling session scheduled late afternoon, yes?” 

A statement of pure black and white fact. And yet it travels down your spine and settles between your legs. Wet heat dampening your thin negligee.

“Yes, Father. Happy Sunday.”

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

Mass was miserable. 

Your corset laced tight enough to meld your two lungs and beating heart into one entity. To say the neckline strangled you is putting it mildly. Cold, uninviting pews dug into your skin at every turn. 

Wretched. 

But the worst of it wasn’t the thin, oxygen-deficient air. Or the shards of glass that slid down your throat with every swallow. Even the jaw pain from tensing your lips in a well-mannered smile for two hours straight was tolerable. 

The worst part of it was him. 

The Priest mesmerized an entire congregation to an ear-splitting hush. 

His first Sunday mass since appointment and nearly everyone in the country and every surrounding province stuffed into the chapel. 

So desperate for blessings from Father Geto. 

Could you blame them?

His voice danced in and out of the pews listlessly. 

Soothing fussy children. Adolescent girls and their mother’s alike — utterly smitten. Adolescent boys experienced their first “I want to be like him” with their fathers sitting right next to them. Husbands glanced feverishly at the women in their lives. 

He had to have noticed it. And yet, he floated above it all the entire service.

Above you. 

Refusing to gift you those eyes that put Vincent Van Gogh to shame. No matter how much you shifted in your seat and straightened your spine.

The Priest spoke to everyone in the room but you. 

Did you read him wrong? 

Did you misinterpret your budding friendship? 

Does it…should it even matter?

Your irritation is palpable. Innocent bystanders are caught in your friendly fire. Including Arella, who changed you out of that horrid costume. And sweet Noel, who ushered you into the seating area — just outside of the good Father’s office.

You make a mental note to send treats to the tender-hearted alter boy. And to apologize profusely to your handmaiden. 

“You are a million miles away, darling.” The sound of your betrothed tows you out of the storm clouds. 

You flicker over to the Duke. Emerald green eyes, high cheek bones — handsome in a way that is characteristic of everyone native to your new home.

“I’m right here, Ezra.” 

“Are you, sweetheart?” The back of his hand caresses your cheek. 

“Mmhm.” You offer your future husband a weak smile and kiss on his cheek. His eyes  faltering slightly, undoubtedly hopeful for lips instead. 

“Good afternoon, Duke and Duchess Ahriman.” 

Father Geto’s velvet greeting encases you both. If Ezra’s arm didn’t guide you to stand you would have been paralyzed in your seat. 

“Father Geto, a pleasure. Thank you for seeing us.” Ezra offers a genuine smile and handshake. Buying you a few extra seconds in your mind’s safe haven.

The Chaplain is tight lipped. Professional. He returns the handshake firmly. 

“Pleasure is mine.” 

Ezra shifts slightly on his feet. Straightening his spine and dropping his shoulders. Your eyes bounce between the Chaplain and your fiancé.

“I must say, Father. You are even more handsome up close. I speak for the men in this country, thank you for taking the vow of celibacy!” The words spill out of the Duke. Unknowingly thinning the air. 

The Priest chuckles quietly, dropping his eyes briefly before landing them on you. And it feels like you could double over.  Your core temperature skyrockets under his smoldering gaze. 

He, the archer. You, the bullseye. 

“Let’s get started, shall we?” 

Ezra laces his fingers in yours, taking the two seats directly in front of the oak desk. A leather bound notebook and pheasant feather pen are neatly arranged — with your names on the first page.

Blue flame rises from your toes to hairline. You might as well have been sitting naked. With how exposed, how vulnerable you feel already.

“What will we be covering first, Father? Something about how wives should obey their husbands, right?” Ezra is light-hearted. Meant to be said in jest.

But he finds himself being the only party in the room laughing. 

The Priest rolls the ink pen between his fingers. Allowing a deafening silence to coat the walls. His expression is neutral, but eyes ablaze. 

“If the man in question is worthy of submission.” He starts. A low, ominous rumble. 

“Uh, yes. Of course.” Ezra responds, shifting in his seat. 

But the Chaplain does not stop. Intent on making a point, he leans in. Pen whirling lightning fast between his long, deft fingers. Enough tailwind to launch across the room, if he desired.  

“If the man in question would give his life for his wife.” Volcanic eyes linger on you, then back to your fiancé. Ezra’s palm finds your thigh. You gnaw on your inner cheek to avoid flinching away. 

“If he would love her like Christ loves all of his creations unconditionally. Unselfishly. Irrationally.” 

“Yes, Father. I understand.” 

“Only then, should she submit.” His serrated tone could split chromium with ease. 

“Of course, of course.” Ezra wisely accepts defeat. 

He presses a short kiss on your cheek as an apology that you didn’t ask for, nor do you want. 

“Mmm.” A forced acknowledgment of the Duke’s affection through your pinched lips. Barely able to move under the Father’s microscopic gaze. 

“Now then,” Father Geto clears the boulders in his throat. 

“Tell me about your love.” 

The question stuns both you and the Duke. Looking to each other sheepishly because neither of you chose this.

War is young men dying and old men talking. And your life path is no different. Dictated by conversations between the powers that be. 

“We’ve only met a week ago, Father.” Your honesty drives both of his eyebrows upward. 

“A week ago?”

“But we are hoping you can teach us.” The Duke, overeager and excitable. 

“Teach you…?” Father Geto muses. You can’t quite interpret his tone, or minimal response. But your heart flutters all the same. 

He is thinking something. And what you would give to get a glance. To be let in. 

“Perhaps guide us?” Ezra gives an unintentionally painful squeeze on your thigh. You fail to muffle the tiny whimper. 

The Priest’s eyes laser down to where your fiancé’s hand lays. Chest rising and falling dangerously slow. 

“Right.”

Your eyes trail upwards as he stands. Closer to God than to you from this point of view.

“Duke, Duchess. You’ll have to accept my sincerest apologies.” 

His fingers dip the unused pen back into the ink cup. The edges of his leather bound notebook coming together. Seemingly without any notes, but an entire script from this session swirling in his mind. 

“My schedule is incorrect. I have another commitment. We will reschedule, yes?” Said with a finality that sends chills crawling down your spine. 

The two of you stand. Another handshake between the men. A restrained nod for you.

Just as quickly as you were let in, Father Geto shuts you out of his office and his mind. 

     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 

Suguru presses his forehead against the shower tile. Warm water raining down his loose mane. Soothing his sore, overworked limbs. 

Today was maddening. 

He nearly destroyed his vestment the minute that God-forsaken counseling session ended. Seeking refuge, he took to the coast. 

And the sea provided anything but peace. 

She was angry with him, tonight. 

Curt. With unpredictable currents. Rip tides at nearly every turn. She tested his adaptation without mercy.

Just like that night.

“I’m going to stay on board, brother!”

Suguru flickered over to the silver-haired deckhand. An unfamiliar reservation opacifying his nearly translucent, iridescent eyes. 

Brother in name, technically. 

Their bloodlines were oil and water. He was a high born. Suguru was born unworthy of a beggar’s pity. 

But, bloodlines were inconsequential when their souls were instep as one. Both handed to humanity on the same night. During a thunderstorm already inscribed in history books.

‘The Tide of Eternal Requiem.’ 

It brought complete devastation. Crops destroyed. Families torn apart by tragic accidents inland and at sea. 

Then fate struck. 

Within the same hour, a voltaic boy, with a halo that put the clouds to shame and diamond eyes that could draw truth from murderers was born into the loving embrace of his parents. 

And Suguru was born with a crown so dark that the raging midnight appeared bright. 

With eyes as ominous as the sky above. 

Gunmetal grey, accented by an eerie violet swarm. Dormant volcanoes, threatening eruption. His birth mother abandoned him in an alley. Driven by fear that he was a bad omen from the Gods. 

“Ahhh, Satoru come on. Since when do you shy away from a few waves?”

Suguru teased. Already well into the process of shedding his work gear. 

“Zeus is the one rumored to be my father.” His counterpart flashed a knowing smile. 

“Poseidon doesn’t watch over me like he does you, Suguru.”

A tsunami couldn’t keep Suguru from his home. Much less a little rain. 

They were 3 miles away from the shoreline. Using his God-given ability, Suguru regularly acted as their scout. Performing his own reconnaissance then alerting the incoming ship of safe or turbulent terrain. 

“Almost ready to go, son?” 

His chosen father came up behind him. Suguru knew there were tears lining his meek eyes before turning to face him. 

“Dad.” Suguru sighed, fully disrobed now. Just his muscular frame and a compression suit. 

He met his father’s concerned gaze. Always like this during sea storms. Quiet prayers written all over his gentle features. 

Despite the worry, he never once attempted to convince his oceanic boy to stay on board. It would have been too cruel.

“I’ll be fine, I’ve traversed angrier swells.”

“Suguru, take care of yourself when I’m gone.” 

Elder, worn hands landed on his shoulders. Nearly too high for his reach. Suguru cocked his head to the side. 

This goodbye was different. 

“Stay on this path. For me. Albeit straight and narrow, there is a wonderful view. This is all for you, son.” 

Both men glanced to the Persian gulf. She thrashed against their vessel. Swaying their catch left and right with the intention of taking her creatures back. 

“Where is this coming from?” A genuine question from his younger self. Unable to read between the lines. 

“Can’t a man just speak from the heart?”

The melancholy smile didn’t meet the wrinkles of time decorating his eyes, but they shared a laugh anyway.  Suguru turned away but was promptly drawn back. 

“My beautiful boy.” 

The fisherman cradled his son’s face. Swimming in the eyes that Suguru once hated. The eyes that convinced his birth mother to abandon him. 

“Make it to shore, son.” Suguru rested his head against his father’s neck. Taking a slow, sweet drag of his scent.

Oak. 

He always smelled like oak. It was one of Suguru’s favorite things about him.

“If Poseidon calls—“

“I’ll tell him to fuck off.” Mischievous grin plastered on Suguru’s face. His father planted a kiss on his cheek, pushing him towards the end of the boat. As he always did.

Then the Gulf wrapped him in her hostile embrace. 

She was irate. 

Vicious tidal waves. Rapidly shifting currents. Even her creatures knew to settle below their usual depth. Suguru cursed the fact that he was born with useless, human lungs. Unable to withstand the pressure of the Midnight Zone. 

Within minutes his long, lean frame was riding her whims without a shred of control. Tossed around like a rag doll. At her complete mercy — or lack thereof. 

This was the first time he struggled to tame his element. A muffled groan bubbled around him. Serrated edges of long coral stalks dug into his back. Stark white foam whirled around him. 

Aerated waters. 

Suguru could barely maneuver against the waves pummeling his core. Searing heat traveling up his spine. His lungs demanded oxygen. 

The boat. 

The boat would never make it to shore. 

Desperate, furious strokes of his arms meant nothing against her unrelenting grasp. Effectively pinning Suguru to his underwater cross. 

A piece of chewed plank wood whizzed by his face. 

Followed by another. 

Then another. 

And Suguru watched his nightmare materialize before his eyes. Mustering his last oxygen reserve, he bellowed against his closed lips.

As if she hadn’t already ignored the cries of his fellow fisherman. 

Even still, he screamed so loud his ribcage should have vaporized. But ushering him to a watery grave at that time would have been too merciful. 

Suguru blinks out of the harrowing memory. The steeping tea takes at least two layers of epithelium off his esophagus.

Fucking, hell. 

He can’t seem to escape pain today.

The swim was excruciating.

Mass was dreadful.

Watching that boy’s hand lay on your lap was grating. 

Suguru’s mind drifts back to you. Your thought washes over him like baptizing waters purifying that which is impure.

The gleam in your eyes when you asked about his morning plunge. Barely a week and your pulse on him is already this precise.

Do not covet, Suguru. 

He scoffs to himself. Shaking free of your tempting spiral. 

This ‘straight and narrow’ path is proving to be more challenging than he let on. 

“Would you be proud, Father?” 

A whisper of accusation at the end of his inquiry. Suguru would give his arms, his eyes…his life to hear his father’s voice on the other end of his questions, once again. 

“Did He tell you?” 

Roaring silence. Of course. He knows that. He expects it. 

But it angers him all the same. 

“Did He come to you in a dream??” Suguru echos louder. More frantic. Punched out in a way he can barely recognize. 

“Was the reaper at His left, my heart on the right?!” A weak sob slips through the crack in his baritone. 

Yet another pain. But this one is tart and blurring his vision. 

“Did you KNOW? D—did you know that day was your last?!” He hisses through a salty stream.  Storming out to the garden to escape the walls collapsing in on him. 

Suguru’s eyes laser to the remaining thorny vines along his bed of hydrangeas. Without a second thought he wraps them around his bare arms. Staining the plant and his freshly bathed skin with crystalline tears. Once its thorns sufficiently bury into his skin he rips it away from the soil with all his might. 

“Bastard. I’m your SON.”

Warm metallic drips down the hills and ridges of his arms. Collecting in the flower bed. 

Is he cursing his earthly father? 

His Heavenly One? 

Or the Deity that brought this grief on him in the first place?

It hurts. 

An unforgiving pain. 

Much like the thorns in those rapids. Much like the inconceivable burn from his lungs begging for expanse. The time limit, even for him, ran lethally low. 

Well exceeding his father’s time limit. 

Poseidon stole from him that day.  

A callous trade for Suguru’s continued existence. 

“Why didn’t you…I—I should’ve been there.” 

Guilt eviscerates Suguru’s remaining resolve. Tilting his head up, he lets the salty crystals rain down his cheeks freely. 

The full moon cradles his face with the same warmth, the same adoration his father’s hands used to. 

Suguru accepts its celestial kisses for a moment before burying his face into his bloodied palms. His damp locks curtain his flushed face. Protecting the world from his unruly sobs.

“I’m here.” Barely audible words escape through desperate grabs for air. 

“I made it to shore, Dad.”

E/N: Oh hello, don’t mind me just sobbing. Also, guest appearance by our glorious Blue Eyed Babygirl King™️ If you need me, I will be in witness protection before Gege finds this since it’s a crime to be a S*toru lover. 

taglist: @blkkizzat @rotteneyess

#jjk fanfic #jjk angst #suguru geto smut #geto smut #geto x reader #jjk geto #jjk x reader #jjk smut #geto suguru x reader #geto suguru #suguru geto #geto #jjk x reader smut #jjk x you #jjk fanfiction #jjk suguru #jjk x y/n #suguru smut #suguru fluff #geto suguru x you #geto suguru smut #jujutsu kaisen suguru #priest geto #poly satosugu #geto angst #geto fluff #jjk fic #suguru geto x reader #suguru geto x you #suguru geto x y/n

[teaenjoyz]

Late talks and early sunsets.

Just like my favorite scenes...

I really think Gojo would have cried listening to that song.

#jjk #fanart #art #jjk fanart #satosugu #geto suguru #satoru gojo #maann i can't #nah id cry

[mieux-de-se-taire]

Skylines and Turnstiles - MCR Interviews

Snagglezine Interview - 4/9/02

Gerard: We saw the plane hit right from the train and when we got there we were all just standing on the pier in Hoboken like right on the edge. There’s like 300 people that were friend and family and we all saw it go down. That’s when I realized that doing this cartoon was bullshit, I love to draw and make art but it was so commercial, it was just that I felt like having meetings with people in suits, it just made me realize what the hell I’m doing with my life. That’s what our 1st song that we always open with “Skylines and Turnstiles” is about. It’s about the Trade Center.

/

Dot Alt Interview - 8/30/02

Paragraph 3

Interviewer: So how did it all begin with MCR? Gerard: Matt and I got together around October/November and I had this song, Skylines and Turnstiles, that we worked out together. We liked where it was going so we asked the best guitarist we knew to play, Ray Toro.

/

Recroom Magazine Interview - 8/12/03

Jessica (Interviewer): What was the first song you wrote as a band? Gerard: "Skylines and Turnstiles.”

/

Alternative Press #197 - 9/17-20/04

Page 5, paragraph 9

“I ran into Matt [Pelissier] at a bar and said, ‘You know what? I’ve been writing songs. You’re not doing anything, and I’m not doing anything, so let’s get together and give it a shot.’” With a no-pressure commitment, Gerard played Pelissier a rough version of “Skylines And Turnstiles,” and he liked what he heard.

Page 6, paragraph 1

The trio recorded a demo in Pelissier’s attic. “My attic had no walls,” he says, laughing. “It was a wooden, run-down piece of crap. I had a really cheap 16-track board, and we had a bunch of crappy mics. I basically had the drums and guitars playing upstairs and ran mics down the stairs and had Gerard sing in the bathroom.” What came out of those sessions were the blueprints for “Our Lady of Sorrows” (original title: “Bring More Knives”), “Cubicles” and “Turnstiles.” “You could hear that it was something really new, and it was kind of a weird idea, but for some reason, as poorly as it was coming together, it really worked,” remembers Gerard. “And a lot of people loved the demo.”

/

Blender Magazine Interview - April 2005

Page 3, paragraph 20 to page 4, paragraph 1

After September 11, Gerard wrote his first song, “Skylines and Turnstiles,” and played it to an old friend, drummer Matt Pelissier. Pelissier knew a guitarist called Ray Toro. “They played me their one song and I was jumping around the attic and headbanging,” says Toro.

/

VMA Virgins Interview - 8/28/05

0:12-0:36

Gerard: The first song was “Skylines and Turnstiles.” I believe I had this blue guitar that I bought because Billie Joe [Armstrong] had like a greenish blue guitar, and I had it from when I was 15 or 16, so I used that guitar to write it in my mom’s basement, and I mean that was it. It was a very direct song about what happened during 9/11 and how I felt about it, and it was what started the band.  

/

Life On the Murder Scene - 2004/2005

19:32-19:47

Gerard: (As “Skylines and Turnstiles” plays in the background) You know I had that song, about September 11th, kind of my way of getting over it. Gerard: (Cuts to another interview) This was kind of like therapy for us when it started, and it still is. Gerard: (Cuts back to the first interview) And I said, “Just, you know, just listen to it,” and so I played it for [Matt Pelissier] and sang it, we played it together, and we just loved the way it sounded. 

/

Kerrang #1142 - 1/17/07

Page 9, paragraph 12

Gerard: From then on, I was in my parent’s basement with a small practice amp and a very old Fender guitar. That’s when I wrote ‘Skylines And Turnstiles’ [as a reaction to what he saw on 9/11] and some of the earlier material. I wrote those songs sitting in my pyjamas with notebooks all around me. It was me going, ‘All this stuff has been inside me for years and I want to get it out.’ I wasn’t depressed at that time exactly but I was certainly a hermit.”

/

Barcelona Live Stream - 3/5/11

7:43-8:04

*Audio Warning for loud booming in the background*

Gerard: (Reading off chat) “Skylines and Turnstiles,” maybe making a comeback Frank: Ah Gerard: We talked about that a lot. Frank: Yeah Gerard: (Pointing at Frank) You always really want it. I think we should try it really soon. Frank: I’d like to rework that song Gerard: Yeah Frank: I think it’d be really good one. But hey, that’d be kinda cool for our 10 year, to do the song that started it all Gerard: Yeah, I would love that. (Everyone starts talking at once for a moment) Maybe for our anniversary we’ll bust that out.

/

Kevin Smith SModcast Interview - 12/5/12

1:32:52-1:33:11

Kevin Smith (Interviewer): Is that the day? Or night? Or, when do you write what is considered to be the first song? Gerard: Oh right, I guess it’s like a week later. Kevin Smith: After that, and it was all predicated on September 11th? Gerard: Mm hmm, with that same Stratocaster, with the same little crappy amp that I had from when I was a kid. I just pulled it out and said, “Alright, I’m gonna do something else.” Kevin Smith: (Overlapping) Where are you? Are you home? Gerard: I’m living at my parent’s house, yeah

/

Where Are Your Boys Tonight? (Chris Payne) - 2020-2022

Chapter 8, page 107

Mikey: The demos got made shortly after 9/11. I was like, “I need to be in this band,” and they were like, “We need a bass player.” The first song I heard was “Skylines and Turnstiles.” It’s a heavy song, you know? I was like, “I want to be a part of this.”

/

Two Minutes To Late Night Interview - 8/15/22

23:13-23:40

Frank: When they started, the first song I think was like “Skylines and Turnstiles,” and it was just like, something happened. Gwarsenio Hall (Interviewer): Right Frank: These guys that I knew, that, you know, were the geekiest, nerdiest, like nicest, kindest, most interesting kids that you wouldn’t even stop and look twice at, like, turned into these-- they were rockstars. It was like-- it was undeniable, and it was unfathomable, like, it was crazy.

#mcr #my chemical romance #i brought you my bullets you brought me your love #bullets #skylines and turnstiles #interviews #song interviews #almost got it in time for the anniversary #next up is my favorite bullets song! #early sunsets!

[e-dubbc11]

Beneath the Surface

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader

Warnings: mentions of emotional and physical abuse. Comfort and fluff. Nightmares

Word Count: 1.2K-ish

Summary: You had a nightmare last night, Billy takes you to your favorite place that always calms you and makes you feel better.

A/N: The beach is one of my favorite places, especially the beaches at home. I’m currently on vacation and the beaches here are pretty fantastic too but there’s no place like home. I’ll put a pic of one of my favorite beaches at sunset close to home at the end of this. I hope you like it!

As always, thank you for reading!  I appreciate it so much and comments, reblogs are welcome and encouraged. Don’t be shy to tell me your favorite part. 💕💕 💕

In between the vibrant energy of a hot New England summer and a cold, desolate winter, after the crowds have gone away and they’ve locked up their summer homes for the season, there was a period of time during late summer of unspoiled tranquility.

That was your favorite time of year to be at the beach. Under a canopy of blue with hues of deep pink, red, and orange, the world seemed to stand still as you listened to the gentle lapping of the waves against the wet sand.

The weather was still warm, a little drier, and a bit more comfortable. Over the grassy dunes, the soft sand stretched out in both directions while small flecks of quartz glistened in the sand beneath the early evening sun.

The soothing symphony of waves crashing against the shore continued to pull you deeper and deeper into a trance like state. The sea looked like a rippling blue blanket with all of its twists and turns, the noise echoed off the rocks, resonated in the air and floated into your ears before it disappeared and the relaxing song started to play all over again.

This was the place that always made you feel better.

No matter what time of year it was, this is where you would come to escape him. The serenity of this place cancelled out the pain, the yelling, name calling, and the bad dreams. But now it was a different type of escape, a happy one where there weren’t any tears to stain your cheeks.

Rupturing the tranquility, you heard the screech of a gull overhead; it startled you and caused you to flinch but the hand enclosed over yours, squeezed you tightly.

The soft voice you heard whispered reassuringly that it was ok, and “he can’t hurt you anymore, sweet girl.” His warm body there next to yours, cradling, comforting you and always keeping you out of harm’s way.

The sand sifted in between your toes as you watched the sun dip lower and lower toward the horizon where the sea and sky dissolve into each other.

The rolling waves lightly crashed against the shore bringing large clumps of seaweed with them and the salty sea breeze gently kicked up tiny grains of sand that ended up stuck in the short bristles of his beard.

His endless brown eyes focused on the dark beauty of the hungry sea, a slight smile stretched across his face, and you watched him wiggle his toes in the warm smooth sand.

He relished in the harmony too. He was very content.

Billy wanted to see the ocean you loved so much as a child, where you came to get away from everything, and where nothing bad had ever happened to you.

He had felt so helpless last night because he couldn’t stop the nightmare from happening, watching the tension grip your body, your knuckles white as you tightly clutched the sheet in your hands, and smothered by your own screams.

He would do anything to keep you from having them but still the sobs tore loose, freeing themselves from inside your throat and echoing throughout the bedroom.

Murmuring soft sounds and words to calm you, Billy tried his best to soothe you from your nightmare. He knew what it was like to be vulnerable while asleep, to fight going to sleep because he didn’t know what would be waiting for him when he closed his eyes but he didn’t care about that right now. It wasn’t about him; it was about you which is why he brought you here.

Billy remembered you talking about your favorite beach, how the music of the waves would sing to you and make you feel better any time that monster hurt you, called you “stupid,” or “ugly,” or threaten to tear you so far down that you couldn’t get back up and no other man would want you. “No one will want someone as damaged as you except me.”

There weren’t any tears this time. As long as you had Billy, you would be ok.

The canvas of bright colors across the sky kissed the high points of your face and melted away the remnants of your nightmare. You looked over at Billy, leaned in close and kissed him on the cheek. He turned slowly to face you, a wide Cheshire cat smile stretched across his lips while the familiar scent of his spicy cologne drifted past your nose.

“Thank you, Billy.” You whispered. “For this.”

You brought your gaze toward the dimming blue sky.

“I wish I could do more, sweet girl. I wish I could replace every memory of him with something else but I can’t.” He said with an alarming edge to his voice.

Billy’s handsome features twisted with rage as he clenched his fist.

Your heart swelled at the thought of Billy wanting to take all of your pain away, wanting to make all of your nightmares disappear forever, never to come back.

“It’s ok, baby. This is my favorite place, and you’re my favorite person.” You said. “Look at our view! It’s perfect!” You exclaimed. “I don’t need anything else. I love you.”

He pulled you into his lap, moved a stray piece of hair away from your face, and touched his forehead to yours. The anger in his eyes was suddenly replaced with love and affection before his lips collided with yours.

He tasted like the sea salt in the air, you could feel it in his hair too as your nails gently raked against his scalp. Parting your lips with his tongue, Billy deepened his kiss, pulling you in tight by the waist, his long agile fingers danced up and down your spine, silently telling you that he loved you too.

Every time Billy kissed you, touched you, held your hand, or even just smiled at you, he was replacing bad memories with good ones, mending the pieces of your shattered soul you deemed unfixable.

He dropped all of his responsibilities today to try and make you feel better, bringing you to your favorite place two states away. And he would do it every day if you let him, if you wanted him to.

The sea was forever vast, uncharted and in a way, reminded you a lot of Billy. It was dark, beautiful, and there was so much more beneath the surface if you took time to unearth the possibilities of the unfamiliar.

Both of you were broken in your own way and still navigating the emotional and metaphorical caverns of Davy Jones’ locker, looking for those priceless treasures within each other that you can’t live without.

You would have to take a deep breath and dive deeper than you’ve ever been before but this time you wouldn’t be alone and promised to pull each other up when you needed air.

His love made it possible for you to breathe again and you would be forever grateful for it…always.

Tag List: @wheresthesunshinesblog @rafaelakelley @idaoftheburningmind @snowkestrel @fakehappy27 @music-indie-tv @fictional-hooman @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @celestialend @k-marzolf @nutmeg17 @rosaleenablack @vaguekayla @qu1etwolf @danzer8705 @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf

Others that might enjoy: @itwasthereaminuteago @fluffyprettykitty @jvanilly @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend @ittybxttykxttytxtty @russosafehaven @mrsbillyrusso

If you’d like to be added (or removed from) my tag list(s) for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕 If I tagged you but you didn’t want to be, just let me know and I’ll never do it again.

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfic #billy russo imagine #billy russo x female reader #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n

[fangsup-cobrastyle]

#mcr #my chemical romance #ibymbybmyl #i brought you my bullets you brought me your love #bullets #poll

[yenqa]

NEW ROMANTICS!

synopsis : y/n continuously struggles to contain her growing feelings for her crush (and longtime friend), lee heeseung.

003 : invisible string

wc : 0.6k

"y/n! come down!"

you hurriedly grab your purse, rushing down the stairs to be greeted with heeseung’s shy smile, while your mother is smiling brightly at him.

"you two have grown so much! i remember when you guys where this short in middle school!" she points to her shoulder, you both exchange awkward glances at each other, nodding slightly.

"we’ve got to get going ms. nam! it was nice talking with you," heeseung slightly bows to your mom as you wave goodbye and head to the car.

"you know you don’t have to talk to my mom every time, right? you can just tell me to come out."

he chuckles, a slight rasp in his voice, when he says, "it’s no problem really, plus it’s nice knowing she likes me already."

you nod, giving him a small smile.

your comfortable silence is slightly taken over by the soft guitar strums of a song you recognize immediately.

"since when did you have taylor swift in your playlist?"

he looks over to you, "i didn’t know any songs by her until you introduced me to this song. it’s your favorite song on the album, right?"

your eyes widen slightly, "yeah! it is! how did you know? i didn’t directly tell you did i?"

he shakes his head, "you always hum this song when we’re doing homework together, you also always play it at least twice when we share headphones."

"oh."

heeseung lets out a breathy laugh, putting his full attention to the road.

looking at his small smile and doe eyes you slightly smile. noticing his small head nods to the calming tune.

you turn your head outside the window to see the busy city opposite of the quiet atmosphere in the car. it’s filled with huge buildings, you quickly spot the new book store. it’s light color making it eye catching in between the tinted glass covered buildings.

the inside has a home-y feeling, the shelves slightly taller than you filled the room. though new, it was surprisingly empty, with just a few other parties looking around. rows and rows of book shelves excite you slightly. you grab heeseung’s hand, dragging him to the desired genre.

he happily follows quickly looking at the books before watching you, excitingly talk about the books you’ve already read or want to read.

he doesn’t mind holding the books you’ve been  wanting to buy (in fact he took the initiative to hold them himself).

after your "hundredth" round of looking at the books (said by heeseung but he doesn’t seem to mind one bit), you both decide it’s best to eat dinner then.

the walk is a short five minutes from the bookstore. you both happily agree to katsu-chicken to eat.

you’re quickly sat down to a booth near the window, with a perfect view of the sunset.

"heeseung?" you call, he looks up from his chicken, slightly tilting his head.

"do you even like reading?"

he chokes on his food slightly "not really." he answers, continuing his initial bite.

"then why did you come to the bookstore with me?"

he shrugs, "what? can’t i spend time with the most wondrous person ever?"

it’s obviously a very sarcastic comment, but your heart can’t help but flutter at the words.

"i am pretty wonderful," you answer, and you both laugh at each others antics. finishing the food on your plates.

the drive home is short, with the roads seeming empty because of the dark hours of the night.

he drops you off at your house, with a happy "see you at school!" before driving off, leaving you watching his car grow smaller and smaller as each second passes.

back masterlist next

☆ YENQA < i was going to make the song playing new romantics but i felt like it didnt feel like the right vibe for it (also its too early to reference the title)

taglist : @viyqe @luvistqrzzz @ifearjwn @tinydeerwasteland @enhastolemyheart @wannabeyn @zuyairus @bunnystrm @yeokii @weoris @ghostiiess @haerinsluvr @flwrshee @theskzvibe @viagumi @heesluvrgirl @hoonvrs @kpopstanmeg @harryedwardtris @ixomiyu @txtbrainrot @xrvrqs @haechansbbg @kimipxl @alkjsdfgg

italics = can’t tag!

#new romantics smau 💐!! #heeseung x reader #heeseung x you #heeseung x y/n #heeseung au #heeseung smau #heeseung fluff #heeseung x yn #heeseung drabbles #heeseung scenarios #heeseung fics #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen x y/n #enhypen fluff #enhypen smau #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen socmed au #enhypen headcanons #enhypen soft hours #enhypen scenarios #enhypen reactions #enhypen au #enhypen fanfic #jay x reader #sim jake x reader #sunghoon x reader #sunoo x reader #jungwon x reader #niki x reader

[aimseytv]

since u played honey on stream last night , whats ur favorite song off of bullets ? :3

early sunsets i can’t lie will always be my top

#man #asksey #bullets

[wandering-winchesters]

hopeless

Pairing: Dean x depressed Reader

Word Count: 3,069

Summary: The reader can feel her depression creeping back in and eventually seeks comfort from Dean, who greets her with open arms.

Trigger Warnings: Depression, anxiety, suicidal ideations,

A/N: This is an incredibly difficult thing to post, I wrote it for myself and wanted to share incase it helped anyone else. I had tears in my eyes as I wrote it. You are not alone. If you are having these thoughts and feelings, please tell someone you love. As always, please let me know what you think ❤️

Masterlist

There are days where I can honestly forget that I have depression and anxiety. There are days where I can almost imagine what it is like to be “normal”. Days where I can breathe easy, where I don’t focus on all of the things that could possibly go wrong, days where the joy is so prominent that it is all that I can focus on. Then there are those days where I can’t fall or stay asleep. I am staying awake until the early hours of the morning and staying asleep until well past noon. Days where going outside is just impossible. I don’t respond to the messages from the people I care about, I don’t communicate to the people I am with. I shut everything and everyone out. 

Today, is one of those bad days. This week has been one of those bad weeks. A culmination of events, compounding, all consuming. That cause me to be pushed off that cliff into depression. On these days, my bed is the only safe place. Even though it is my own mind that is responsible for these feelings, I am the only person who fully understands me. What it feels like to be me and have the thoughts that I do. I am curled up in bed, the playlist on my phone shuffling some of my favorite songs. Even though nothing bad happened today, I am a mess. Depression and anxiety battling within me to come out on top, a constant scream of emotions tumbling through me all at once. I sat in bed, my back pressed against the head board, my knees pulled to my chest and my eyes fixed on the wall opposite my bed. Everything felt hopeless. What’s the point of fighting this battle, every single day? It never seems to get any easier, do I really want to live like this for the rest of my life? Another sixty plus years? I know the answer to that, no. It would be easier to surrender to the darkness and just slip away. Could I really do that? I don’t know. On the good days, no. I could never leave Dean and Sam, the people who saved me five long years ago. I couldn’t leave my family. On these bad days, it’s a thought. An ugly, exhausting and overwhelming thought. 

My eyes wander around the darkened outline of my room, the only light coming from the alarm clock on my nightstand. The white letters illuminated, reminding me just how late into the night it is. 4:23 A.M. The question now is, do I continue to fight the battle of trying to fall asleep, or do I get up and start the day. 

I decide on the latter, clamoring out of my bed and pulling hoodie and a pair of leggings. I stretch my body, exhaustion hanging heavy even though sleep would not come. 

I head out of my room, quietly closing the door behind me. I tip toe through the hallway of the bunker, not needing light to guide me as I know it like the back of my hand. 

When I reach the kitchen, I flip the light on, the familiar surroundings coming into focus before me. I put a new filter into the coffee maker and start the coffee for the morning. Even though I will mostly drink the entire pot myself before the boys ever get up. I glance in the refrigerator, before deciding that I wasn’t hungry. I couldn’t remember the last time I had eaten, yesterday? The day before? I don’t know, but hunger was still evading me. I fill my mug with coffee, perfecting it to my taste and head outside the bunker. I take a seat on the bench that Dean had brought back just for me, knowing that watching the sunsets and sunrises were one of my favorite pastimes. I take a deep breath and enjoy the silence around me, the birds are beginning to wake and their song is springing forth. The moon is low in the sky, the horizon turning from blues to oranges and pinks. Something that on most days, brings me immense joy. However, today, it is a dull pang of happiness. The darkness within me too loud to be distracted by the beauty around me. 

“You’re up early.” I jump, spilling a couple drops of my coffee onto my thigh. I wince as the hot liquid quickly cools against my skin from the outside air. Dean comes to sit next to me on the bench muttering a quiet apology as he sits, his features still dripping of sleep. His hair disheveled and eyes tired. He stifles a yawn and gives me a gentle smile. “Yea, I woke up and just couldn’t fall back asleep.” I lie, taking a sip of my coffee and doing my best to return his smile. If he picks up on my lie, he doesn’t act like it. We sit like that in mostly silence, watching the sunrise. My mind begins to wander once again, drifting through the question I had posed to myself earlier, did I really want to live like this for the next 60 years? The sunsets are beautiful, but my mind is ugly. It’s a daily challenge to get out of bed, something that if you had asked me as a teenager, I thought it would have gotten easier by now. 

“Y/N? Did you hear me?” I hum in response, snapped back to my senses by his gentle elbow into my rips. His eyes fixed on me, concern beginning to creep over his face. 

“Sorry, no. What did you say?” I ask, giving him what I hope to be a reassuring smile. 

“Any grand plans for today?” He asks, but I can tell he isn’t convinced by the smile I gave him. Something that I need to get better at, I don’t need him worrying about me and asking more questions. He has enough on his plate. 

The day drags by slowly, a mixture of getting lost in thought and trying to keep up with the Winchester brothers. They decided to go out for dinner and tried to get me to come along, but I declined. An excuse of not being hungry and that I was tired and wanted to go to bed. Dean, again, was not convinced. His brow creased as he saw himself out of my room. I could feel his unspoken questions hanging heavy between us, but he didn’t speak them aloud. 

I went to bed as soon as they left, even though it was early. The physical and mental exhaustion battling within me for the tallest spot on the podium. I laid in bed, scrolling aimlessly through my phone, not focusing on anything in particular, just trying to make time pass. I quickly shut my phone off and close my eyes when I hear footsteps approaching. I hear a soft knock at my door and I ignore it, not wanting to speak to anyone really. Nonetheless, my door creaks open and Dean quietly calls my name. When he doesn’t get a response he quietly crosses the room and sits on the edge of my bed. His hands gently pull a blanket over me and he leans down to press a kiss to my forehead, before quietly leaving my room. The second he closes the door behind him, I pull my phone back out and continue to scroll aimlessly through lore that I am not even reading. I doze off eventually, into a nightmare filled sleep that only lasts for about thirty minutes. When I wake, my heart is beating against my ribs. 

I glance at the clock on my nightstand for what feels like the millionth time tonight and it is only 2:47 in the morning, but I physically cannot lay here any longer. I repeat the same actions as yesterday morning, leggings, hoodie, quietly out into the hallway, towards the kitchen, turn on the light. I am grabbing the filter for the coffee pot when I freeze, I realize that I can feel someones eyes on me and I spin on my heel to find Dean. He had been sitting at the table in the dark, his arms crossed across his chest, face tired but serious. His eyes are soft, but piercing, focused completely on me. 

“What are you doing up?” I ask, trying to disguise the coffee filter in my hand, scrambling to come up with a good explanation as to why I am up this early. He raises an eyebrow at me, his thumb tugging against his bottom lip before he tucks his hand back under his arm.  “I could ask you the same thing. What is going on with you?” He asks, gesturing for me to take a seat at the table across from him. I don’t. I keep my back pressed against the kitchen counter, my arms defensively coming to rest across my middle. 

“Nothing, just needed water Dean.” I respond, my voice a lot snippier than I intended. He notices, but doesn’t comment on my tone. 

“You need a coffee filter for water? See, I really don’t believe that. Are you going to tell me what’s wrong or do I need to tell you what I think is going on?” He asks once again, accepting that I am not going to sit with him. He kicks his feet up, resting his boots on the seat across from him. He’s settling in for the long haul. I don’t verbally respond to his question, so he continues.

“You aren’t eating. You are isolating yourself. You aren’t here anymore, you’re somewhere else entirely. I had a suspicion that you haven’t been sleeping and this little middle of the night escapade of coffee at three in the freakin’ morning, confirmed that. If you want to pretend you’re asleep when I come into your room, fine. But at least don’t resume watching the same video the second I close your door, I am not deaf.” My cheeks are flushed and I can feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes, but I don’t want to cry. So instead, I allow anger to erupt within me as a need to defend my actions arise. 

“What makes you think I am not eating? I don’t have to talk to you when you come into my room uninvited!” I snap, my hands gesturing wildly as I speak. I expect him to snap back but he doesn’t. He is completely unfazed, his green eyes continue to burn a hole in my own. I shift uncomfortably, the amount of effort it takes to remain angry and not break down in front of him is exhausting. 

“Y/N, sweetheart. I can see it, in every thing that you do. I can see the exhaustion engrained in you, I can see the internal battle that you are fighting. I can tell that you don’t want me to know, that you want to handle this yourself. But, Y/N,I care for you, about you. I want to help you. I see you.” His words hit me like a punch to the gut. I hug my arms tighter against my body, desperately trying to stop this wave of emotion bubbling up within me, but it’s useless. I bite my lip to stifle the sob that leaves my throat, managing to make it the smallest bit quieter. My eyes are trained on the floor tears beginning to overflow.

“Y/N, you don’t have to go through this alone.” Dean speaks again, his words gentle and soft. I allow myself to meet his gaze once again, hot tears streaming down my cheeks. He is on his feet before I can blink, he closes the distance between us in a few long strides. His hands find my body and tug me into his embrace. I don’t hesitate to bury my face in his chest, the fabric of his t-shirt absorbing my tears as they fall. I can’t help but let everything out, the sobs that wrack my body ugly and loud. My eyes are clenched shut, unsuccessfully trying to slow the flow of my tears. His voice is low as he hold me, his hands traveling over my body. His grip on me never wavering, he supports my weight when my knees grow weak. His touch is gentle but firm and reassuring. I didn’t realize just how much I needed him, until it was too late to stop the waves of emotion flooding the space between us. He holds me until my tears slow, my breathing gets a bit easier and my grip on his t-shirt loosens ever so slightly. 

“Talk to me.” He whispers, gingerly pressing a kiss to the crown of my head. I take a shaky breath, gathering my words and debating just how much I want to tell him. I land on everything. I release my grip on him and he takes a step back, enough so he can see me, but still close enough that I can feel his presence. I cross my arms across my chest once again and start to speak. I look down at my feet, unwilling to watch his expression as I speak. 

“I don’t want to do this anymore, Dean. It’s too much. I have gotten three hours of sleep over the last three days. I can’t bear to eat. Every day is a constant battle to just survive, it would be so much easier to just give up. I want to give up. I want to let everything go and just slip away. I don’t want to leave you and Sam, but you don’t need me. No one needs me. It would be so much simpler if I just-“ I stop, unsure if I can actually verbalize my next sentence. I have thought the words many times before, but verbalizing them to the man that I loved more than he would ever know. Could I do that to him? I gather the courage to look at him and I am caught off guard by the sight before me. Dean is silently crying, his eyes fixed upon me. His fingers rush to brush away his tears, he is trying to remain strong for my sake and It sends a fresh wave of guilt through me. This is why I never wanted to express this to him, I wanted to keep it to myself, he shouldn’t have to talk me down from this level of self hatred and depression. 

“I knew that something was tearing you to pieces, sweetheart. I could see it, I could hear it in your voice, but I-I never imagined this. I know it’s hard, but you have to believe me when I say that there is nothing but love for you within me. I would never be okay without you. I’d be a mess, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if something or someone took you from me. Especially if you took yourself from me, Y/N. I can never lose you. You make my world a brighter place. I love you and I want to spend every day of my life showing you just how much you mean to me.” He’s pleading with me now, closing the distance between us once again. His hands pulling me into a bone crushing hug, his tears now falling onto my clothes. We stay like this for awhile, my sadness slowly fading to just complete exhaustion. My body sags against his, my eyes closing trying to relieve the burn from crying. 

“Dean?” I ask, my voice barely a whisper. “Can I ask a favor?” 

“Anything, sweetheart.” He respond, not relinquishing his hold on me in the slightest. 

“Take me to bed and stay with me tonight?” Dean wholeheartedly agrees, he takes me by my hand and pulls me gently behind him. I follow him, confused when we walk right past my room. He brings me to his, opening the door and closing it once I cross the threshold. He leads me to his bed and climbs in under the covers, he pulls the blankets back and I climb in next to him. His arms wrap around my body, pulling me into him firmly. My head comes to rest on his chest, one of his hands coming to rest on my back, the other on the nape of my neck, his touch calming and reassuring. 

“Thank you.” I whisper and he doesn’t speak, only pulls me closer. “I love you, too Dean. I will fight everyday to be able to spend my life with you.” He exhales sharply and I can almost feel the sense of relief wash over him. I turn towards him, propping myself up on my elbow, enough to look at him. 

I lean towards him, holding my breath, hoping this is what he wants too. I stop, our lips millimeters apart and wait for him to close the distance and he does, our lips crashing together in the most love filled exchange I’ve ever experienced. 

“Promise me you won’t give up on life, Y/N. Please.” He ask, his eyes searching my own and it kills me to see the pain and uncertainty swimming through his. I nod, a small smile forming on my lips. 

“I promise, Dean.” He nods, relief washing over him. He tugs me back against him, my head resting on his chest once again. For the first time in days, my thoughts are silent. The only darkness enveloping my senses is a welcome friend, sleep running towards me at full speed and I welcome it wholeheartedly. My eyes fall shut and sleep takes over my senses, encouraged by the gentle touch of my beloved Winchester. 

While his love could not cure my depression, his love gave me a reason. It gave me hope, in the midst of hopelessness. He held a torch for me on my darkest nights. When I couldn’t stand to fight for my own life, he’d take up that cross. With his help, it got easier. On the nights I couldn’t sleep he’d talk to me until I did. He made me food on days where I couldn’t do it myself. He loved the parts of me that I wanted to hide. He made life worth living. I wanted to live those sixty years I had dreaded facing. No matter the battle, there is always hope. 

tag list: @roseblue373

if you’d like to be added, just ask.

#deanwinchesterxreader #supernatural dean #dean winchester #deanwinchesterblurb #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester fic #dean winchester fluff #deanwinchesterfluff #sam and dean #dean x you #dean x reader #spn #sam winchester #supernatural fic #supernatural #dean x yn #dean x reader fluff #dean winchester SPN #dean winchester imagine #dean x reader imagine #dean winchester x you #Dean Winchester x Female!Reader #fluff #fluffy #dean fluff #supernatural spn #wanderingwinchesters #dean winchester comfort #dean winchester angst #dean winchester x injured reader

[buttercupjosh]

Underneath the Stars

(Gif credit to @jonasiegenthaler)

Word count: 3,075

Warnings: none

Genres: established relationship, fluff, self-insert

A/N: I’m back at it again by participating in @wyattjohnston’s Summer Fic Exchange and this is my story for @ilyasorokinn, written with the very handsome Nico Hischier. I hope that you like it. I’m sorry in advance that it kinda goes by fast and about the timeline format but I just wanted to try something different. I also decided to challenge myself a bit more by writing adding some dialogue so please bear with me if the conversations aren’t that great. This is an established relationship story (so there’s no meet cute this time, which was a challenge for me to not write one). I’ve also never been to New York City before so I used Google to help me and I apologize for any inaccuracies. Title and some of the story elements comes from Underneath the Stars by Mariah Carey (which I highly recommend listening to). There are also some elements of the journey across NYC events that take place in “The Sun Is Also A Star” by Nicola Yoon (book). As always, I’m open to any and all feedback, comments or questions; just put them in my inbox or dm me. Thank you so much in advance for reading, I appreciate it😌 (P.S. I have other stories (linked here) that I have written for other players as well if you want to check it out)

Optional/recommended listening: Underneath the Stars by Mariah Carey

“Who needs a crowd when you’re happy at a party of two?” -Late To The Party by Kacey Musgraves

7:05-10:00 pm

Another Devils season had yet again come to an end without making the Stanley Cup Final. It was a bit disappointing but the nice thing about being eliminated early is that you had some additional time to spend with your boyfriend, Nico. You were excited to see him but you knew your time together would be bittersweet. You were granted a summer sports medicine fellowship opportunity in California but that meant that you would spend the whole summer away from Nico and you would not be able to visit him in Switzerland either. Nico was happy for you, achieving something that you worked really hard for, but he was also a bit sad that you wouldn’t be able to spend the off-season together and be in the same place without worrying about the hockey season for a few months. You and Nico had been separated at times before, while he was away on road trips, but this felt much different. 

For your last outing together before going your separate ways, you agreed to go into the city to watch the Mets play against your favorite team, the San Francisco Giants. Yes, although you were dating the captain of a hockey team, your favorite sport was baseball. Despite being surrounded by others, the PATH train ride into the city felt like you were the only 2 people on board. During your trip, you noticed that the light from the waning sunset bathed Nico in the warmest glow. Before you knew it, you were in New York City and continued the rest of your journey. After taking the main NYC subway, you arrived to your destination at Citi Field and had a lot of fun at the game. It was so nice to enjoy your favorite pastime with Nico and it didn’t hurt that he looked good in a baseball jersey as well. Every time you watched a game, Nico always asked you questions about what was going on since baseball isn’t as popular in Switzerland. It was fun to be on the other side as the one explaining the game to him, just like he would explain things to you when you watched his beloved soccer together or had questions about hockey. One nice memory that was made during the game was singing along to “Take Me Out to The Ball Game”; the song was such a classic and Nico even joked that there should be a hockey version of the song, which made you giggle. Your time together at the game flew by and to your delight, the Giants won.

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10:10 pm-10:15 pm

After the game, you planned on taking the subway together back over to New Jersey but Nico could sense that something was off on your walk to the station.

“Hey, what’s wrong? You look upset.” Nico asked with a hint of concern in his voice.

“I’m sorry, Nico, I just don’t want this night to end. I’ve been having such a good time with you and I know once you leave, I won’t see you for a while,”  you replied, trying to hold back tears. 

Nico felt the same way, he knew he would go back to Jersey, go to sleep, and have to wait months before seeing you again.

“It doesn’t have to end, my love. What else should we do then?”, Nico said with a smile on his face.

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10:40 pm-12:56 am

After your conversation, you decided to go to a late night showing of Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse at Alamo Drafthouse. Before the movie, you and Nico stopped at a nearby bodega to get some snacks to sneak in. Nico didn’t care if the snacks were a bit unhealthy because it was the off-season and although it was wrong to sneak in outside food, it’s not like the theater employees were going to kick you out anyways. There weren't many people around for the showing so it was almost like the movie was shown just for the two of you. During the movie, Nico subconsciously put his arm around you and tried to pull you in closer; he would miss movie nights with you. It was a rare opportunity for him to just sit down and relax with his lover. The movie itself was super amazing and after the movie, you and Nico had a lengthy conversation about the events of the film.

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1:00 am-2:00 am

Sleep may be an athlete’s secret weapon but even at 1 am, Nico still had energy. You ended up having a game night at Brooklyn Bowl since it was the only fun place that wasn’t a bar that was still open. Of course, being an athlete meant there was a competitive side to Nico so he was trying his best to win the game. You, on the other hand, were just having fun and didn’t care as much about winning. Nico’s goal was to get a strike but he kept knocking most of the pins down except for 1 or 2 so when you got a strike in your casual play, Nico was ecstatic. He lifted you up in the air and spun you around, making you laugh. All of the other patrons must have thought he was drunk but no, he was just sober and so happy for you. You were slightly embarrassed by your boyfriend’s excited gesture but you didn’t care because yet again, he made you laugh. Hearing you laugh was a sound that Nico would miss while you were apart from each other. Despite striking out, you didn’t win the game and Nico never achieved getting a strike but he had more points so winning allowed him to gain even more energy for the rest of the evening.

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2:30-3:00 am

Since Brooklyn Bowl closes at 2 am, there was still time in the night and exhaustion hadn’t hit either of you yet so you and Nico headed back towards Manhattan. Nico decided that the best way to expel some of his extra energy was singing and bopping around. Nico’s actions inspired an activity. You decided to go for a late-night karaoke session at a karaoke bar called Karaoke Boho Orchard in the Lower East Side. Thankfully, this karaoke bar had private rooms so you wouldn’t have to worry about singing on stage in front of strangers. 

Nico wanted to sing first and he dedicated “Lover” by Taylor Swift to you; it was a song that you loved dearly. Although Nico’s vocals were a bit off-key, you were so in awe observing him sing and you began to quietly tear up a little bit. While you were wrapped up in your bubble of awe, you didn’t quite realize that Nico had finished singing; you didn’t even think about what song you were going to sing. After scrolling through the song catalog, you serenaded Nico to “Always Be My Baby” by Mariah Carey. The song reminded the two of you that no matter what separates you, you’ll always be a part of each other. Nico’s heart began to fill with so much amusement and joy with your musical tribute. Listening to you enunciate the words of the song sounded almost like poetry. If Nico wasn’t weak in the knees with loving you from before, watching you sing to him made him hit the ground. After you completed the song, Nico suggested singing a duet together and you settled on “Islands In The Stream” by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers. Although it was cheesy, singing love songs to your lover and with your lover reminded you both that the love you shared was so strong. For the rest of your time, you and Nico continued to sing different songs. It was so much fun singing and dancing together; it was a side that rarely came out but whenever it did, you both always had a good time.

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3:00-3:45 am

The karaoke room was paid by the hour but Nico was a bit hungry so the two of you made a quick stop at Katz’s Deli since it was the only food place open nearby. The restaurant was surprisingly not filled with many people so you and Nico sat close to the walls; observing the wall photos, trying to figure out who the famous faces were.

“Do you think I should tell them who I am so I can get my picture on the wall?” Nico jokingly asked while you waited for your food to come out.

“Nico, you do know this is Rangers territory? They would rather burn your picture than put it up” you whisper replied.

“Y/n, you do know that the diners in Jersey are better right?” Nico said in a not-so-serious louder tone.

“Nico, how dare you insult an iconic New York institution?” you gritted through your teeth.

You playfully swatted at him and thankfully, your waiter arrived with your order of potato latkes and matzo ball soup. Over the meal, you and Nico chatted and people-watched those who came in and out of the restaurant. 

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3:45-5:00 am

As the night dragged into the almost sunrise hours, you started getting tired. Nico suggested that you rent a hotel room and rest; he knew that you would probably fall asleep on the train ride back to New Jersey and preferred for you to rest somewhere somewhat comfortable. The closest hotel was the Hotel Indigo Lower East Side, which was right next door to Katz’s Deli. You pleaded with Nico that he didn’t have to pay for a last-minute hotel room but he insisted. The front desk person who checked in was a Devils fan so they gave you a discount and a room with a spectacular view of the city. Nico embraced you as you lay in bed and you tried your best to fall asleep but you couldn’t quite stop staring at the sea of lights from the City That Never Sleeps right outside of your window. You wanted to continue to talk to Nico but as soon as his head hit the pillow, he was knocked out. Over time, your eyes fell heavy and you went to sleep.

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5:00-6:00 am

You couldn’t quite stay asleep, your brain raced with thoughts about how your time with Nico was winding down, even though, he was right next to you. You watched Nico as he slept, matching your breaths with the rise and fall of his chest, wondering what he was dreaming about; he looked so peaceful. You tried to quietly slip out of Nico’s arms but he kept pulling you back to hold you close to him. Nico’s eyes fluttered open once he felt the flat space of the mattress after you successfully broke free to use the bathroom. When you emerged from the bathroom, Nico’s big brown eyes greeted yours and he was sitting up in bed. 

“Are you okay? Do you want to switch rooms?”, Nico asked with the same hint of concern from earlier in the evening.

“No, I’m good. I just can’t sleep”, you replied back, “ but you can go back to bed.”

“Do you want to leave and go back home then?”, Nico suggested.

Hearing him say that made the reality of your time ending together hit you in a painful spot but it was for the best; you couldn’t stop putting off the inevitable separation that was going to happen soon. You agreed to go home. On the elevator ride downstairs, Nico expressed that he would want to come back to see more parts of the city and for a staycation with you and you suggested that since the hotel had a rooftop bar, it would be a good spot to host a team party.

Instead of taking a train to get there, you decided to walk to the PATH train station that would return you back to New Jersey. On your walk, you and Nico passed through sections of the New York University campus and even made a quick stop at Washington Square Park. Although the park wasn’t as large as Central Park, it was nice to stroll around together and there was a warm gentle breeze that wrapped around you. There weren’t many people around, just a few joggers and people walking their dogs. At one point during your walk, Nico wanted to take a quick break to sit on the grass. Sitting on the grass eventually turned into laying on the grass. There were still a few stars out from the previous evening but not long before, you watched the sun begin to spill the warm colors into the sky; the rising sunlight dressed you in a warm glow. It was hitting Nico bad that this would be the last time that he would hold you for the rest of the summer and he planted a kiss on your head. You felt a tear hit your scalp and you looked up to see Nico crying a little. You had never seen Nico cry like this before but you reassured him that everything was going to be okay. After the sun fully rose, you and Nico left the park to go home. As you walked under the Washington Square Arch, you squeezed Nico’s hand three times as a quiet gesture to remind him that you loved him.

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6:30-7:30 am

The train ride back to Jersey had much fewer people than the train ride over. You and Nico sat in the back, wrapped in your own personal bubble. Nico kept trying to stay awake to maximize the time you had left together but he ended up taking a nap on your shoulder. You still couldn’t quite fall fully asleep yet. Although he didn’t have to do so, you were grateful that Nico sacrificed his time and sleep schedule to spend all night with you. Nico felt similarly; there was no one else in this world that he would be willing to spend sunset to sunrise in NYC, running on little sleep than with you. While he was asleep, you slipped a custom handmade letter bead bracelet onto Nico’s wrist. It was neutral colored and it had your initials together on it so everytime Nico looked down at his wrist, he would be reminded of you. You and Nico hadn’t planned on exchanging gifts before you left but you decided to make it for for him once you realized that you wouldn’t be spending the summer together.

After arriving in Jersey, you and Nico went to a local diner to share one last meal together. As you waited for your order, you were calmly soaking in your final moments with Nico but he was a bit antsy in his seat. Something was on his mind and he couldn’t quite keep in any longer.

“Can we take it to go? I want one final moment with just us.” Nico declared.

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8:00 am

Over your last breakfast at your apartment, you and Nico reflected on last night’s events and the memories you made together. The time you had together sailed by so fast and you both had such a great time; it was both beautiful and bittersweet at the same time. You were obviously surrounded by people everywhere you went that evening but at times, it felt like the city felt like it was your own secret, special place.

Nico’s flight to Switzerland wasn’t scheduled to leave until the following afternoon so he still had time to get some sleep and finalize any final things before leaving the country until returning for training camp in September. After breakfast was done, you and Nico migrated toward the couch to watch the news; watching the morning news together was a rare thing that you got to do together whenever Nico had a weekend off day. You tried your best to stay awake but a wave of tiredness crashed hard into you and you ended up drifting off to sleep in Nico’s arms on the couch. As you lay deep asleep in Nico’s arms, he reluctantly said goodbye. He really didn’t want to leave you behind and wish that he could just move your summer fellowship to Switzerland so that you could be enjoying a Swiss summer with him. He would spend part of his time, missing you being so far away and trying to perfect a potato latke recipe to match the one you had enjoyed at Katz’s Deli. Being this close to you for one last time, Nico could feel himself fading into you and feel the parts of you that faded into him with each minute that passed and he had hoped that these parts would stick around long after he left (which they did).

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Time unknown

You woke up hours later on the couch, feeling a bit disoriented. The TV was turned off and you were covered in a blanket. It was dark outside and Nico was gone but he left a gift behind for you. Before going to shower, you noticed that there was a stack of Polaroids and one of Nico’s bracelets on the coffee table. The stack contained all of the pictures from the evening before that Nico took on his phone: the photo of you and Nico at a baseball game that was taken by a fan, a photo of you singing karaoke, an image of Nico taking a selfie while you were looking off-guard at the Katz’ Deli picture wall, a photo of your side profile looking out the window on the train ride home and a Nico selfie on the grass at Washington Square Park to round out the stack. On the back of each Polaroid, Nico wrote “I love you so much” and other sweet notes. You were slightly confused as to how Nico did this but you realized that he had secretly stashed his mobile Polaroid printer at your apartment. It was such a kind gesture that Nico put these photos together for you. Last night felt like a dream but the love captured in those photographs were the most significant memories you would hold onto. Whether you were hundreds of miles or a few inches apart, the love you both shared was always there, lingering around in your hearts. It sucked that you would be separated for a brief moment in time but each day apart was one day closer to being together again.

#nico hischier #new jersey devils #Nico Hischier fic #Nico Hischier x reader #Nico Hischier imagine #hockey #hockey fic #hockey imagine #the summer fic exchange 2k23 #hockey writing #my writing #please read my story

[hesawifebeaterdanusethegun]

Favorite band? Favorite artist? Favorite song? Favorite album?

Favorite Band: My Chemical Romance

Favorite Artist: Gerard Way

Favorite Song: Early Sunsets Over Monroeville or Demolition Lovers by MCR

Favorite Album: I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love by MCR

#can you tell i like mcr a little bit #my chemical romance #mcr #gerard way #asks