#different traumas and how to move forward with what He feels is right rather than like.. following what qui-gon asked of him

[certified-anakinfucker]

for the character solidifying asks - 49 and 50 for the oc(s) of your choice !

hiiii oh my gosh is this the first time youve been in my ask box. i think so. i am so sorry it has taken me a literal month but here, i offer you my second favorite jedi dad and then a miserable wet rat of a seer character solidifying asks here

49. What about voice? Pitch? Strength? Tempo and rhythm of speech? Pronunciation? Accent? Hellir’-Amderak Edi Drovaddal // Hellir’ has a very smooth, soulful, I won’t say gentle but.. non-domineering voice. He is a Diplomat and must adjust his voice as needed for pretty much any situation but at rest he is quite soft-spoken, and pronounces his words pretty easily? He doesn’t speak so crisp when he’s not on the job. It’s between a mumble, and just on the tip of a smile. He’s VERY deliberate, no matter what the case may be. If he says it, he means it. And he has kept his native Balosar accent to him (which is like a typical Coruscanti Basic accent, just.. slightly to the left of the usual from what you hear on the surface but not quite found on any other level. A bit gruff, choppy at times, but never upset or accusatory or negative. It’s just a little to the left of it all.)

50. What are the prevailing facial expressions? Sour? Cheerful? Dominating? Jupso Onurimaa // He always looks like he’s suffering, because he usually is. It’s the slightly furrowed brow, a little frown to him, lips pressed tightly together, he’s got worry and remorse in his eyes more than anything else. He’s withdrawn even in expression, when anyone’s able to see it. He used to be very good at hiding this away from others but he’s slipped up majorly since resurrection, and if you see him with no veil…

#cheeri inquires #cheeri ocs #oc tag | [hellir'-amderak edi drovaddal] #oc tag | [jupso onurimaa] #IVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT JUPSO MORE RECENTLY THANKS TO @ KIWIKIPEDIA AND MANNNN #i almost feel bad for jupso. #like hellir' certainly had it difficult with being the one picking up in qui-gon's aftermath and he helped obi-wan work through a lot of #different traumas and how to move forward with what He feels is right rather than like.. following what qui-gon asked of him #he's already been a savior many times over and he just loves to see others grow because he himself was taught so well and carried on after #his master “mysteriously disappeared” (cough cough got vanished on purpose) #but then jupso is just kinda. really pathetic #he saw a prophecy that yoda and his four students would ultimately bring down the order if yoda. HIS OWN MASTER AT THE TIME. was not taken #out of the grandmaster position. but instead of going w the prophecy he just left the order entirely and went back home #his family and wife convinced him to go back and save the children at least but he refused to get anywhere near yoda #and thus allowed the prophecy to not only come to fruition but also allowed a consequential prophecy to manifest in one of his padawans #that pretty much said “good job. the force is about to break into physical shards and with it will come hell. have fun” #he couldn't even die in peace bc the grim reaper said no. LOL suffer

[klausysworld]

Hii, I love your work <3, it's so good

I was wondering if you could do a Klaus x reader when Klaus is reader's psychologist or therapist and he knows all her shit and falls in love with her (I'd even like to see some jealousy from Klaus because reader always chooses men who treat her horrible and he tries to be professional about it but in the end he can't, he kind of thinks he would treat her better (even in the sexual part))

Which would hurt more?

Klaus had been seeing his client Y/n L/Y/N for a few weeks now, once on a Sunday and again on a Thursday for an hour or so each time depending on his schedule and if he could push other clients back to hear her.

He knew he probably shouldn’t have a favourite patient but despite most of their conversations being on rather traumatic or emotional topics, he looked forward to seeing her and listening to everything happening in her day to day life as well as her past.

He enjoyed seeing her progress and helping her to understand her own feelings. Even if he mostly listened and offered advice that he knew she wouldn’t actually use.

So there he was already waiting on his chair with the door open for her to come in while he got the past session notes out. His lips turned up as he heard her voice ring from the hall

“I’m so sorry I’m late Dr Mikaelson, I got caught up” she explained, through heavy breathing as she rushed in and closed the door before going to her usual choice of seating opposite him.

“Not an issue y/n, and please call me Klaus” he smiled at her and she quickly mirrored it as she dropped her bag and brushed the hair out of her face. “So, how was your morning?” He questioned while clicking his pen

“Well- okay so last night I was out with this guy right? Whatever, stayed the night at his but then woke up and I was like shit. I’m on the other side of town, no car, lost my keys, the dick took my cash from my purse and disappeared before I woke up and I couldn’t find my phone anywhere so I had to find my own way here without any money. Ergo I ran cuz I woke late and I’m just behind on everything, you?” She rushed out in one long breath leaving him speechless for a moment before glancing to his empty page.

And then began a long session about her decisions, how she got to them, how she would do them differently and why she thinks she chooses then more often than she’d like.

See Y/n seemed to do this a lot. From what Klaus could tell, she frequently allowed random men to use her body only to feel awful about herself after. He assumed it to be her own version of self harm, abusing her body to try feel better for a moment.

Problem was she didn’t see it that way, and he knew she planned to keep doing it. And although he had many suggestions, he couldn’t exactly tell her what she can and can’t do.

But he could be there for her and try to help her find a better way to her future.

And over time, he managed to see some change in her behaviour. She got more self aware and was able to move past some of her childhood trauma.

The problem with her being self aware was that she knew what she was doing and it was only upsetting her more each time she had to tell him that she’d done it again.

And although he hasn’t ever hugged a patient in the past, he couldn’t help but comfort her as she cried for nearly the entire session. It was his main mistake.

Having her in his arms felt too good for her to be just a client. Being able to smell her hair as her face nuzzled his neck was delightful and in that moment he wished they were stood in his their own house, under entirely different circumstances and together.

Of course once she pulled away and sniffled her ‘thank you’ back to him, he snapped out of it and cleared his throat to try and push away his thoughts.

And from then it only got worse.

One hug became many over the weeks, until she was greeting him and leaving him with a cuddle each time.

And then the dreams kicked in, he knew he could treat her so much better than any other and he loathed every man who took advantage of her vulnerable state. He just wanted to have her as his, to hold and love her like she deserved.

Of course he tried to shove his thoughts away when he actually saw her but then she began wearing more intriguing outfits. Revealing and suggestive clothing that surely drove his mind mad.

His eyes would shut and his lips would part as her breasts pushed right up against him and she hummed with her lips by his ear. Klaus couldn’t help his mind wondering to the idea of having his face between said breasts, hands squeezing and fingers pinching. He couldn’t help glance down for a second as they pulled away to get a peek at her cleavage and when he looked back to her eyes he knew she knew and that made it harder.

Months went by and he found himself waking up with her name fresh on his lips, cock up and solid, sweat coating his body as he groaned aloud and pulled the blanket off his body only to sigh in defeat at the cum that already covered his abs.

She made it difficult to concentrate on anything she was saying now that such a rich red lipstick painted her lips each day, his note book became more and more blank each session and he seemed to find himself picturing her in all sorts of positions as she told him about another imbecile she slept with. God he just wanted to have her beneath him, head back as she screamed his name and forgot about every fool she had ever been with before.

And when she kept coming to him upset or hurt both physically and/or emotionally by another boy…he couldn’t stop himself from snapping and telling her she needed to stop abusing herself which caused a heavy silence to hang over them.

She had cleared her throat and pulled at her jacket to hide her breasts that she had originally wanted on display for him.

And that’s when he realised that he was another person who she though would use her and leave her. She wanted him to hurt her.

He stood up slowly and moved to sit beside her on the couch she were on, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him, he rest his chin on top her head and sighed through his nose

“I shouldn’t have said that, I’m sorry y/n” he told her

“It’s fine, you’re right” she whispered but he could hear the crack in her voice and it hurt his heart.

He kissed her temple tenderly and helped her onto his lap which probably wasn’t his finest idea but he did so nevertheless. His hand gently rubbed up and down her arm as she bit the inside of her cheek in an attempt to not cry again in front of him even though it was what he was there for.

“I never mean to upset you sweetheart” he murmured, tucking some of her hand behind her ear

“I’m sorry” she whispered and he frowned

“No lovely, never be sorry, it’s my job to listen to you. I was very out of line…” he thought for a moment before his brain gave him a brilliant idea “how about we do something to cheer you up? You like sweet things don’t you y/n, how about we go to the cafe just down the street?” He offered

“Is that allowed?” She asked quietly, of course she wanted to spend time with him and she had purple been trying to get his attention but now she was getting it, she worried that it would hurt his career. He was a highly recommended psychologist and she wouldn’t ever want to ruin his reputation.

He hesitated for a moment before sighing “probably not no…but I’ll go get you something and bring it back okay? You happy to wait here?” He leaned back to see her face as she turned to him.

“Are you sure? I’ll grab my purse so-“

“Nonsense love, It’s my version of an apology” he hushed her as he stood “just stay here, snoop if you must and I’ll be back shortly” he kissed her forehead before leaving.

It was an odd situation to be in, her psychologist holding and kissing her and buying her things to make her feel better.

She thought she’d seduce him, fuck him and then he’d have to let her go as a client and she’d be on her own again. But he didn’t take her against his desk and then throw her out, he kept looking out for her, taking care of her and being kind. It was bizarre and everything in her argued on whether she should run or stay.

She wasn’t sure which would hurt more. Staying, falling completely in love with someone she knew she wasn’t allowed or running away from the only good thing in her life at the moment.

She was never great at decisions and Klaus knew that.

Which is why he wasn’t overly surprised when he got back with the cakes in his hands only to find that she had left only a note as a sign she had once been there.

He placed the food down and sighed, he shouldn’t have left her alone. He didn’t know what he was thinking anymore. He just knew that she was important to him now and he needed to find her, sooner rather than later.

#human klaus Mikaelson #therapist!klaus #psychologist!klaus #human klaus #yandere human klaus #the originals #klaus mikaelson #the vampire diaries #klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson one shot #klaus mikealson fanfiction #klaus mikaleson imagine #niklaus imagines #rebekah mikaelson #klaus m #the vampire diares imagine #elijah mikaelson #klaus michaelson #klaus mikaelson x y/n #kol mikaelson #tvd klaus #niklaus mikaelson #tvd universe #hope mikaelson #klaus mikaelson headcanon #klaus mikaelson fluff #klaus mikaelson yandere #klaus mikealson smut #klaus mikaelson x yn #klaus mikealson x reader

[emelinstriker]

First off, I'm really sorry about everything that's been happening around your blog. This AU has been such a huge source of comfort for me in my everyday life, and it pains me to see jerks with nothing better to do than to ruin the happiness of others affect this blog so much. However, on a different note, if you would be so kind as to let me tell you about a daydream I had about your AU, that would be just the most!

So, I was revisiting some old fandoms of mine, and I suppose those began mixing with the ESAU at some point. You know the song "Drift Away" from Steven Universe? I was thinking about how sad it was when the ESAU popped into my mind and OH BOY. I thought about this little scenario! (I apologize for the poor writing):

One of the many Master reincarnations that stuck with Macaque was the long gone Master *Gertrude. It wasn't because she led an interesting life or had special affections for him, but rather that she abandoned him. Fed up with him for being the most affectionate and always in her space, she brought him out into a field. Alone. She smiled and hugged him, something Macaque couldn't have recalled her ever doing towards him in the past, before telling him to stand still in the open field and not to move until she came back. Macaque had wanted to ask her questions about where she was going when she gave him her next and final command, to not ask her questions. With that, she left, and Macaque sensed a feeling of strong joy coming from her and, well, if his Master was happy, than he was overjoyed! And so he waited. Minutes passed by, then hours, then days and a week. And before Macaque knew it, months had gone by, follows by years. Years of standing and waiting for his Master to come back with him, with nothing but the occasional bird or rabbit passing by, which he would snatch up and eat to feed himself and keep himself busy. But Macaque couldn't understand the situation, couldn't understand why any of this was happening, until one day when he saw the other champions coming his way. By this point, the grass in the field was overgrown and the flowers had withered. A few vines reached around Macaque, keeping him planted down to the Earth, as if it was reclaiming him. His fur was filthy and unkempt and he had dark circles around his eyes because it was hard to sleep standing up, in the open, alone. Macaque had watched as his brother and the other champions approached him, Wukong coming forward in swift strides to help pull off the greenery growing on him and hugged him tightly. Macaque... felt like crying although he could hardly understand why.

"Master is dead." Wukong had spoken with his usual monotone voice, but it cracked. Hearing his brother's voice crack broke Macaque and he hugged him back, feeling warm tears running down his face and he asked the question that had been racking his mind for decades.

"Why did Master never come back for me?" Wukong couldn't answer, no one could bare to tell him except for Mink.

"Master got rid of you because they didn't like you. But don't yell at us for never looking for you, because she specifically requested that we didn't and so here we are."

Macaque remembers how he broke down right there, tired after years of standing there with sleepless nights and little to eat or do. He remembers vowing to never trust their Master so blindly again, reminding himself to keep all the qualities Master Gertrude found annoying to a minimum. Macaque won't make the same upsetting mistake twice.

*I'm really sorry if this is the name of any one who might be reading this, I mean no offense! I just looked for a name that isn't frequently used in the modern day and that's what came up

I don't know, maybe I'll write a fanfiction with the next reincarnated Reader comforting Macaque after all this trauma of abandonment, poor baby boy... An AU of an AU, how thrilling!

This could work with any of the champions, in my opinion, because, I think, that if their Master wills it, no matter how harmful it is, they would just instinctually oblige. I only used Macaque because, if this happened to him, I would just break down crying and hug him till I die! Anyways, I hope you liked this, Emelin, and please please please give me validation! Thank you, you're the best!

OOOOOO i love this omg- THE ANGST- THE AAANGSSST- I also love the moment of Wukong's voice crack- it's literally lil moments like this where he shows vulnerability and emotions- fhgnfhgnfhg

Very well written and fitting character choice for this!! :D

But how dare that Master not like Macaque's affection and just abandon him?? HE'S THE MOST WHOLESOME OF THEM ALL- If we ignore the more murderous side of him of course- BUT HE'S SO FLUFFY TOWARDS HIS MASTER AND DESERVES THE BEST FLUFF IN RETURN- HDSFNDSHFNHDSFHNHDSNHSD

Like- this is so in-character for them though- Especially between the monkey bros since Macaque is usually so eager and happy about completing a task to make his Master happy- hgfnhgnfghf the feels of potential heavy angst, man- Gotta love it-

I'd definitely read a part two with a Master who actually gives him the fluffy comfort he deserves and needs gfhgnfhjgf

#lmk esau #eternal servants au #esau qna #esau fanart #angst #hnfghnfgh #holdup lemme pull up nate's version of drift away #haven't vibed to it in a long while

[indigostarfire]

A very long post of me rambling so I could connect the dots and map out the factors that led Jae Won to shift out of his deep depression and isolation from Ji Hyun. The script gives us a trail of breadcrumbs to follow.

Jae Won’s therapist points out that Jae Won is locked into his own perspective which ultimately is guilting and beating him up inside. She also tells him, “You’re really selfish,” and Jae Won is shocked. “Because you’re so focused on your own trauma, you’re ignoring others.” This is a completely different perspective, one that Jae Won has never even considered. It’s a key truth that will ultimately help him move forward.

The therapist tells him to overcome his own trauma first, but that’s easier said than done. So what events catalyze his shift?

Well we first see Jae Won break out of his depressive mood when he witnesses Yoon Won in distress and crying about her life. And for the first time since the accident Jae Won is displaying empathy rather than the “totally shutdown, I’m dead on the inside” expression he normally has.

So we now know he is capable of feeling another person’s pain and can respond with compassion.

Next is the kiss scene with Eun Ji which I feel is pivotal in Jae Won being able to break through his depressive, blaming mindset.

Oh the irony! Eun Ji thinks she flaunting and flexing her relationship with Jae Won in front of Ji Hyun’s crushed face BUT this is ultimately the undoing of their relationship. In reality this was the moment where Jae Won sees Ji Hyun’s absolute pain. Jae Won was indeed so focused on his own trauma that he didn’t realize how much his relationship with Eun Ji was hurting and stabbing Ji Hyun right through the heart.

Witnessing Ji Hyun’s pain (because we now know he can actually see another’s pain) Jae Won RESPONDS by pushing Eun Ji away.

In Jae Won’s walk back to Ji Hyun’s workplace, my guess is that Jae Won is thinking about what his therapist said; how he has ignored Ji Hyun’s feelings and only focused on his trauma and trying to “protect” him. And is Jae Won ok with being someone who just dished out pain to Ji Hyun? No, I don’t think so.

Perhaps Jae Won can even recall that moment when Ji Hyun reaches out and lovingly holds Jae Won’s hands (prior to the meeting about the surfing incident). Jae Won initially recoils but Ji Hyun persists and Jae Won allows himself to let a bit of love in even though he feels he doesn’t deserve it. And is he ok with how he returns Ji Hyun’s love and concern with pain from that kiss with Eun Ji? I don’t think so.

Next when Ji Hyun calls out to Jae Won, we see Jae Won approaching Ji Hyun. He no longer ignores or avoids Ji Hyun. This is a definite change and a seemingly small but huge step forward.

Ji Hyun is a trooper. He will continue to love and support Jae Won without pressuring him. And he buys his hyung a camera, and tells him “the past is just the past.” “You can’t erase or forget about the past.”

Yes the past holds the tragic death of Jae Won’s brother and the almost-death of Ji Hyun but the past also holds the bright, beautiful, and loving moments with Ji Hyun. Someone who he could be himself with, someone he didn’t have to wear a mask with, someone who was his sanctuary and place to rest. The past holds both the darkness and the light. So what will Jae Won choose to focus on?

We finally see Jae Won break up with Eun Ji, and I think it largely had to do with Jae Won seeing Ji Hyun’s pain due to the kiss.

Next we have sajangnim giving Jae Won the final installment of advice and perspectives. She basically tells him since it’s not a health or money problem, he’s good! People will always be stressed out and worried so don’t be discouraged just live how you want to.

I feel that all of Ji Hyun’s actions and the perspectives from the therapist and sajangnim finally lands so that by the Han river, we see Jae Won able to focus and reminisce about the bright and beautiful moments he’s had with Ji Hyun.

And finally, those song lyrics! Ji Hyun sending that song to Jae Won delivers his feelings through its lyrics. It’s about two best friends who loved each other and wished they could be more but there was too much fear in the way. The song continues: “but I think it could work for you and me…it’s not the end of the story, just wait and see.” Then we see Jae Won moving forward. He’s actually walking to see Ji Hyun. His mood has changed. Jae Won now is allowing himself to want the happy ending too.

#if you made it to the end I’m amazed #and thank you for reading it #the eighth sense #t8s ep. 9 meta #thoughts on what made Jae Won change #mlite reflections

[zenosanalytic]

So I was reading Karen from HR(go read it!) by Unpretty(go follow her!!) last night and I think it crystalized for me part of why I LOVE her characterization of Bruce Wayne so much(I mean: just basically that she treats ALL the characters as WHOLE PEOPLE rather than split-personalities ala the wornout Kill Bill analysis of Superman[which you weren't SUPPOSED to agree with! Bill's the VILLAIN GUYS!! But that's a different essay u_u] is Enough but she does so much more...), namely:

"Batman" isn't a way Bruce deals with his trauma, it's a way he AVOIDS dealing with his trauma.

Yes this is an analysis post about a fanfic |:| Obvsl, ***Spoilers*** |:| |:|

Ok so here we go: This is Bruce reacting to the grief of Corinne's co-workers at her death

He wanted to put distance between them. It wasn't fair to any of them to be irritated. It wasn't their fault. Nails on a chalkboard, their noisy grief repulsive. The self-centered way the living mourned their memory of the dead. Accepted death as a force of nature, an act of god. No fury in them, no action. No problems to be fixed. A hole in their lives to fill with tears until they couldn't feel the emptiness anymore.

Don't worry, he knows how fucked up it is to think this way and there are lines immediately following which show that(he is so well characterized in this and all related works PLEASE Trust me, Dear Readers) but I want to focus on THIS and what it says about how BRUCE relates to grief and mourning.

He thinks mourning is a way to put death behind you; a way to center your OWN feelings of grief and loss in the midst of something terrible which has happened to SOMEONE ELSE. Right off the bat(heh) this is telling us he has NEVER let himself mourn for his parents because he's talking about it in 3rd Person; as something separate from himself(and please don't sleep on how he also talks about The Living in the same way, implicitly classifying himself outside that category as well) Bruce is a Raw-Fucking-Nerve 24/7, and has been since his parents' were killed right in front of him, and refuses to heal or even face his emotions about that event because doing either might mean moving on and he thinks that would be selfish.

Actually, let's look at another line from before this which I think clarifies his emotional reality wonderfully:

He looked out at all the employees, all huddled together in different groups, whispering and checking their phones and waiting for the police to tell them they could leave. Some of them crying. Everyone giving him a wide berth. There was blood on his shirt. Bruce Wayne didn't have any reason to be handling this well. Shouldn't have been handling this well. Safer for the sake of secrets not to handle it well. With that decided, he found the nearest trash can and started heaving into it. Better. He hadn't done that in years. He grabbed a flute of champagne from the abandoned buffet table and downed it like a shot, then another. It helped get the taste of acid off his tongue. He let his hands shake. It felt like a normal thing to happen, his hands shaking.

Allowing himself the physical expressions of grief and trauma soothes him; feels normal. Because it's not something he's let himself do in years(probably lying to himself here; probably since the murders). He can only psychologically allow himself to physically grieve as an act to keep up appearances; he can only grieve by disassociating. Which of course also means he's never PRIVATELY allowed himself this grief. Jesus-Fuck

Let's jump forward, to an exchange with Dick Grayson(first robin/nightwing), to drive this point home. It's a longer dialogue I don't want to include all of so the context: Corinne died before earlier in the week and Nightwing found her, but she revived and left the scene before he returned from catching the culprit, and Dick just told this to Bruce:

"You could have talked to me about it," Bruce added, looking at the ballroom and not at him. "When that happened. How you were. Feeling." Nightwing huffed a sound that wasn't a laugh. "Right," he said. "Sure." Bruce grit his teeth. Nightwing clapped him on the shoulder. "Let's do that," he said. "You can come over later, tell me how you're feeling about all this." Bruce said nothing. "Yeah," Nightwing said, patting his shoulder as he disengaged and stepped away. "That's what I figured."

There is so much here, and it all hurts so good. 1)Bruce is thinking of himself as Bruce; again Unpretty treats the "secret-identity" superheroes as what they are, facades; Bruce does not think of himself as Batman, Batman is a persona-tool(one might say a worksona :3) Bruce uses 2) but Dick isn't Dick even when he's in his civvies he's Nightwing, because Bruce needs to distance and disassociate himself from the emotions he won't let himself process and that's what he uses the personas to do 3)this is made explicit by both his passive refusal of Dick's sympathy and offer of comfort, and the bitter sarcasm of Dick's offer of it, which communicates this is an offer that has always been there, and always been denied. Dick cares for Bruce and wants to help him heal but knows Bruce won't let him care for him and won't heal, and this refusal has visibly damaged their relationship.

Oh and 4) "You could have talked to me about it": Bruce's desire to help others is tied directly to his refusal to let others help him, and his refusal to mourn his parents/let himself grieve/heal. Because his desire to help IS a trauma-response, because you Can't Actually Just Suppress This Shit Away. This situation is So Fucked Up for Dick: Dick wants to be comforted by Bruce as much as he wants to comfort him, but he knows letting Bruce comfort him would Only Reinforce His Pain; Would Only PUSH HIM FURTHER AWAY. Again I say to you: Jesus-Fuck.

Ok so: this next bit isn't directly related to this, it's more of like a second-order thing, but a few chapters later Bruce is helping Corinne make empanadas and he talks about his dad and I think this is also Quite Revealing:

..."My father liked to cook," Bruce said eventually as he peeled paper away from garlic to pull away cloves. "He was very passionate about food. About joy."...

I'm going to skip around a bit here cuz it's in the context of a much longer/larger scene

..."We had a chef, but he liked to make meals himself when he could. Food as a symbol, food as a way to love himself, to love life. Finding joy in the work it takes for even a fleeting moment of happiness, gone in the time it takes to clear a plate."... .... "I don't have that," Bruce said. "His sense of taste. I don't think I've ever enjoyed anything as much as he enjoyed good soup."

BRUUUUUUUUCE!!!! No wonder everyone wants to fuck this man. We can fix him, guys; WE CAN FIX HIM NO SHUTUP EVERYBODY BEFORE WERE ALL DOING IT WRONG BUT WE GET IT WE CA- ok I'll stop now.

First I want to be mean for a little bit and call bullshit here cuz unpretty's Bruce is One of the most Eloquent Motherfuckers Around. Fuck You You don't enjoy things "Food as a symbol, food as a way to love himself, to love life" Goddaminit just admit you love your dad you son of a bitch!!! And while you're at it, admit you like to talk so that words sound good leaving noisehole!!! Admit that you love Competence; Admit it!! ADMIT IT!!!(*entirely metaphorically shaking this take of Bruce Wayne by his lapels tho not really cuz he's conservatively the size of a hardwood armoire*)

But seriously: I again point you at disassociation. Batman seems like a really active response to grief, and the way unpretty writes it it physically IS... in the same way that a person who responds to grief by turning to alcohol or sex or thrill-seeking instead of going to the funeral is very actively partaking in those activities. Psychologically though it's actually a passive, avoidant response; a refusal to feel, to face, to deal with that pain. It's not Bruce's fault that he doesn't realize that he enjoys being poetic and eloquent or that he enjoys being GOOD at things(or that he enjoys LOOKING good and FEELING LIKE HE LOOKS GOOD and BEING ADMIRED FOR HIS BEAUTY, for that matter, or that helping someone cook connects him with his Dad) because BRUCE DOES NOT LET HIMSELF EXPERIENCE HIS EMOTIONS DIRECTLY. All of his emotions are exactly like that Horror and Trauma and Grief at the top right after Corinne had been shot: Moderated through performance as a 3rd Person experience of himself. He has no idea what he's feeling, and he hasn't had any idea what he's feeling since the night his parents were killed and he won't LET himself have any idea what he's feeling because to do so would be to MOVE ON and (he thinks)FORGET and ACCEPT THAT THEY REALLY ARE DEAD and he thinks that would be SELFISH!! BRUUUCE! BRUUUUUUCE!!!

UUUGH! Ok, that was actually a tangent and not what I ACTUALLY wanted to talk about here(tho also: EXACTLY what I wanted to talk about here):

"I don't have that," Bruce said. "His sense of taste. I don't think I've ever enjoyed anything as much as he enjoyed good soup."

This sentence is so huge, but you really need a bit more context to understand why. One: even aside from his trauma Bruce has a very detached and clinical way of thinking

The knife moved quickly and looked much fancier than when she did it. "You're really good at that," she said. "You should get your knives sharpened," he said. "Yeah," she agreed, pouring eggy water into her bowl to mix with a spoon. "Do you cook a lot?" "No." There was silence before he clarified. "I dislike the inefficiency." "Oh." "It's necessary to function," he said. "I prefer to spend my time on other things." ... "It isn't a matter of health or moral fortitude," he said carefully. "No more than you not drinking coffee. It isn't particularly admirable to not do things you don't enjoy. I don't enjoy food as much as other people do. That's all."

Two: Karen from HR is part of a wider body of work called Sorrowful and Immaculate Hearts(Read It!!!), and in it there is a fic about Bruce's parents, set when Bruce is a child, called Wayne Manor(You know the drill u_u), and in Wayne Manor it's very clear that Bruce is autistic, which the above way of thinking about things is an expression of. His parents are wonderful about this, and there's allot of evidence that Bruce's mother is also autistic and makes such a point about being wonderful about it due to her own abuse for being autistic as a child, and as a child Bruce seems to feel nothing but confidence and happiness in his autistic qualities. But the trauma of the death of his parents has somehow changed that.

I would argue that Bruce ties these autistic qualities, which he associates with his parents because they affirmed and celebrated and shared them, with the way he has responded to their murders, with Batman, which he is deeply conflicted about; something he consciously deems a MORE ethical, active, and "problem-solving" approach to death than mourning, while subconsciously recognizing is deeply fucked up and unhealthy for him and everyone in his life. He's come to attach his clinicality, his "dislike [for] inefficiency", to Batman, and thus as something which sets apart and isolates him; something "lacking" in himself which denies him the joy his father was able to feel. Again: obvsl that's bullshit for the reasons I listed above --his interest in doing things well is THE SAME THING his father felt, is something which his own decision to bring up his father shows connects him to his father IN THAT VERY SCENE and it is his disassociation from his trauma which prevents him from acknowledging and experiencing the joy he finds in doing things well-- but thoughts don't have to be rational for us to believe and hurt ourselves with them. Humans are irrational; human psychology is irrational.

Unpretty understands this so fucking well. She writes Bruce Wayne(and all these characters really) so fucking well. Unpretty's Bruce Wayne is a Deeply Irrational, Hyperrational, Hypercompetent Man. She has turned the power-fantasy of multiple generations of USian men into the Saddest and Wettest of Meow-Meows. This stuff is So Tasty numnumnum I eats it up I EATS IT!! Bruce is such a fucked up dude; his loves and self hatred all wound up and tied together and hiding themselves from him within a trauma Too Huge for him to ever face; "making himself useful" and "solving problems" to everyone and everywhere as an act of ultimate self-annihilation; Heroism as Self Healing as Self Destruction; The Noblest and most Beautiful of Lies; Delicious this Gourmet Fucking Meal she is serving us.

I don't read the comics and I can't call myself a huge fan of the movies, but I SO wish I could see a theatrical take on this character that understood as well as Unpretty does that Batman is a story Bruce Wayne tells himself and that it Isn't Fucking Helping.

#unpretty #Karen from HR #Fanfic #Long Posts #Bruce Wayne #Sorrowful and Immaculate Hearts #Wayne Manor #Batman Fanfic #DC #Batman #Writing #Characterization #Character Studies #zA Analysis #The Critical Stance #Gr8 Art #appreciative reblogs

[thedreadvampy]

watched monkey man. Thoughts:

dev patel is a really good actor

it's a beautifully put together film visually, the action flows great and the close focus and different speeds are really engaging.

also really enjoyed the sound design for the most part although Roxanne was a pretty funny needle drop for the strip club scene

haha this film is not even in the vicinity of fucking around. not since del toro's peak has a film been so utterly resistant to subtlety when it comes to You Understanding What It Thinks Of Fascism. which I appreciate, to be clear. it is right and good to beat hindutva fascist murderers to death with a shoe.

I was legitimately really emotionally moved by the protagonist's character arc and I thought it handled the trauma and sexual violence elements in ways that were sensitive and not gratuitous

having said that I did feel like it dropped a lot of threads I would have liked to see carried through more fully, and I think that hurt its attempts to be sensitive about gendered violence.

outside of the protagonist there isn't really much of an arc to the female characters - other than the temple guardian, the hijras aren't really given any character or individuation other than as an en masse backdrop to dev patel's badassification, and although it's sick as hell to see them kick some ass at the end, they kind of fall into the background, without their actions or deaths being given much dramatic weight.

Similarly the sex worker character gets two moments of significant characterisation - when she talks to him outside early on and when she fucks up the hotel owner at the end - and that implies an arc of her moving from resignation to hope but imo a lot of what we actually see of her in between those moments is only through the lens of how her mistreatment triggers the protagonist into thinking about his mother's assault.

So I don't think it's intentional and it clearly reads as though we're meant to understand both the hijra community and the sex worker as the protagonist's allies and comrades, but because we only really see them through the lens of how they move his story forwards, it does at times feel like it falls back into a trope of 'women and marginalised people's abuse happens in order to motivate a man to do manly violence' and none of the women depicted as the subject of violence - not the hijras, not the sex worker, not his mother - are the focus of power and subjectivity in the story. The mother comes closest in that - she's clearly established as involved in resistance and she acts both to protect her child and defend herself, and is also humanised and characterised - whereas the present-day women are kind of instrumentalised - they don't have particularly defined personalities and they mostly exist to inspire the protagonist to act by their suffering, and to be inspired to act by his example.

Other than the gender/power aspect where it gets a bit male saviour-y, there were a few other characters I felt like I was expecting to come back or be expanded on that just didn't.

The dog was one element - it was very built up early on, obviously it plays a part in his first failed attempt, then it just falls off the film which is weird cause it felt like they were introducing a thematic throughline.

also the guy from the hotel - I was already kind of confused about his motivation for going with Dev Patel in the police chase, since I thought we'd established him as being profit motivated rather than having a significant relationship with the protagonist, and then we see him on and off throughout the second act, which feels like it's building to him having some significant part to play, and perhaps it's understanding why he chose to align with the terrorist against his employer. then after the Dev-Patel-Has-Leveled-Up ring fight scene, where he's Dev Patel's biggest fan, he fully vanishes from the film never to be seen again. I do not know what I'm meant to take from this character.

couple more thoughts

the priest character is a really strong villain and that final fight was really really good, it truly did keep me on the edge of my seat.

I'm a little bit in love with the mother

man he REALLY wanted to bite that guy's nose off in the brothel fight. he literally goes in to bite the nose off THREE SEPARATE TIMES before he successfully does it. there are other bits of him to attack, I just think.

based on the trailer and the marketing, I really expected it to be gorier I think? there are some conceptually gnarly injuries and kills but the camera speeds by then pretty fast and the bulk of the film is not about the spectacle of violence. this isn't a complaint but it wasn't what I anticipated.

for me I think actually the only thing that made me wince was the bleach thing. and also I'm no pharmacist but I feel like snorting bleach should have fucked singh up more than it did, he seemed surprisingly fine other than a mild nosebleed.

speaking of bleach - really enjoyed that setup and payoff and callback but like the bit where he bleached the mask was very cool and then he only wore it for like 1 minute of screen time then took it straight off again before even entering the hotel. I just feel like he's not fully committing to this Hanuman thing.

ooh I really liked the bit right before the final fight kicks off where Not-Modi is addressing the room full of donors and it's so full of references to the British Raj and highlighting Not-Modi's public school accent, I thought that made really good points about the commonality of oppression. I also appreciated the moment where Dev Patel chooses to let Not-Modi, the political outcrop, go, and instead go after the ideological heart of the movement.

look it's been said but the bit where he bounces off the window in the first act is such a good choice. it's funny and it's also tense. works well.

all told I had a good time, and I liked that it was as on the nose and specific about its goals as possible, although I did feel like it dropped some threads which made it feel weaker than it otherwise might - I think that while I liked the first act, some of it could have been trimmed back in favour of fleshing out some of the side characters in the back half of the film so that they felt a bit less instrumentalised and a bit more human, which was done really well with the mother imo. overall I reckon 8.5/10.

#red said #monkey man

[scintillatingshortgirl19]

I want to clarify something re: my issues with the James Tartt storyline.

I've been seeing a lot of posts and comments talking about how everyone deserves a shot at redemption and that that should not mean "everyone but James and Rupert" - and I want to say I think those posts are absolutely correct. As a lifelong villain fan I actually have massive, massive issues with the concept of any fictional character being considered by fandom to be truly "irredeemable" (especially since that line seems to be different for every single person), and I often hate the ideas fandoms tend to pass around about what fictional characters do or do not "deserve," so I want to make it clear that my issues with James' implied redemption have absolutely nothing to do with whether or not I think he deserves it. I strongly believe addiction is a disease and that everyone - even abusive, terrible people - should get the chance to change. This is especially true of fictional characters, since exploring concepts of second chances and redemptions within a story doesn't pose any risks to real-life people.

That said, these are the reasons why I think this whole thing was absolutely terrible from a storytelling perspective.

There are stories that are served well by canon leaving some things offscreen and letting the viewer fill in the blanks, but I don't think that's remotely the case here. To do this story justice, they needed to give it time. They needed to give it at least a modicum of buildup. They needed to show us this journey, rather than just telling us about it in a brief, sunlight-doused clip and saying "be happy about this, damn it!" Seeing them happy and smiling together is an enormous leap that should've taken much longer to get to than the show implies, and as a result it feels extremely jarring. Jamie reconnecting with his dad is an incredibly messy and complex storyline that needed to develop over time, and it was a huge mistake to just gloss over it like the writers did.

Show me James hitting rock bottom and how he ended up in rehab. Show me Jamie's conflicted feelings about reconnecting with him. Show me Jamie coming to an understanding that not reconnecting with his dad is also a perfectly valid option, and that letting go of his fear of and anger at James is not dependent on Jamie giving James any more of his time or energy. Show me Jamie being fully, actively aware that no matter what he chooses, letting James back into his life is not necessary for Jamie to move forward and grow as a person. Show me Jamie putting up boundaries to protect himself throughout this process - physically and emotionally. Show me James getting to know his son as an actual person and not just an object to use for his own selfish ends. Show me the emotional journey of this father, ravaged by addiction and his own unprocessed trauma, learning how to love and take a genuine interest in his son for perhaps the first time ever. Show me Jamie talking to his friends about this and getting their opinions and support. Show me Jamie having sessions with Dr. Sharon so I know he isn't undertaking this journey without therapeutic guidance.

You could make the argument that all of the above is implied, and you'd probably be right. But at the end of the day, I maintain that this father and son journey needed to be given actual screentime - especially because James' abuse of Jamie was given so much screentime, not to mention the additional bomb that was dropped on us in Sunflowers about what James did to Jamie when he was fourteen (and then was never brought up again, leaving me to assume Jamie still has yet to even realize that that was an instance of sexual assault). James verbally, emotionally, and physically abused Jamie for years, and the story did not shy away from showing us the effects of that. The story of Jamie reconnecting with this man should have been a half-season arc at minimum, and they had no business showing us that without also showing us Jamie processing the trauma they told us about in Sunflowers.

And it's frustrating because the more I think about it, the more I love the idea of a story centered around a son and his abusive father reconnecting and the messiness of that father trying to become a better person and heal from addiction and the complexity of that son trying to reconcile his love for his dad with his need to fully recognize and process what was done to him. I would love an exploration of James' past - maybe his dad took him to a red light district when he was 14, too. Maybe that was all he knew, and he certainly hasn't processed his own trauma, so of course he did the same thing to his own son. Maybe the cycle of abuse goes back generations and generations, and James and Jamie BOTH get to break it, not just Jamie (although that could only be true for James in a fairly limited sense, considering the permanent damage he did to Jamie cannot be undone). Anyway, my point is that it all has the potential to be so, so compelling - but the way they executed it just felt so oversimplified and rushed and cheap, and also sent some really problematic messages.

Tl;dr: I do genuinely think that, given proper time to develop it, there could've been a way to do this story well. This was not it.

#ted lasso #jamie tartt #james tartt #ted lasso spoilers

[good-wine-and-cheese]

Grimmer is Immune to Johan

Probably a stretch and my reasoning definitely boils down to “because I think that would be interesting and will analyse text based on this premise” so don’t take me too seriously lol (but I’m right)

I mostly wanted to write this because I lament the fact that Johan and Grimmer never really get any proper interactions together despite being, in my opinion, much better narrative foils to each other than Johan is to Tenma. They were made of the same building blocks, but turned out as total opposition to one another. We do get a faint taste of this through Milosz, and that’s actually part of what makes me argue this point: Milosz was saved.

Before really getting into Grimmer vs. Johan, it’s important to draw another distinction. Grimmer and Roberto are the ones often compared, given their ties to one another. They both went to Kinderheim, and both were similarly broken down to hollow human husks, then left the orphanage and began different lives. It’s here, once they moved on, that an important distinction is made.

While little is known about Roberto and so there’s not much to go on here, he indicates while talking to Lunge that he lived as an impersonal mercenary, with no connections to anyone or anything. Because he never speaks on having had any connection of any kind, my assumption here is this has always been the case for him.

Grimmer on the other hand became very much connected to people. While, yes, it was a facade - he didn’t care about them, he was performing a role as a spy - he did still have a grounded existence in which people were familiar with him, treated him like a friend, a husband, a father. Even if it was false, Grimmer had grounded himself by living a life. Roberto was transient, with no other person to validate his existence.

In a way, I connect Grimmer to Nina; both have little to no memory of their childhood, and both were “given” a new name, living their lives under this new persona and growing into a person of their own, holding that new name as a part of themselves. Basically, Grimmer has an identity. He started developing into a proper person, and allowed himself to move forward with his life as that person. And after losing the people that had become his family, he set his sights on a goal to unearth the organization that had put him through everything he endured. While he is contemplating his past here, he’s doing so through the lens of a forward-moving goal; he can’t achieve it if he’s only looking back. Achieving his goal means he has to keep moving forward.

The reason that Johan was able to get to Roberto, and to sway him to perfect loyalty, was because Roberto had nothing to ground him in the present, and nothing to look for in the future. He was stuck in the past, and having someone validate those feelings gave him ground to stand on. He finally had a connection, but that connection was fixing him into his past, rather than pulling him forward. He’s trapped by Johan and sees no future except “the end”.

Overall this is how Johan works; he himself is unable to let go of the past, and sympathizes with people who in turn have traumas they’re unable to let go of, helping them to embrace that part of themselves instead of moving on. Convincing people to kill themselves isn’t that hard when all that exists for them is their past, and the future has no meaning.

This brings us back to the pseudo-conflict between Grimmer and Johan over Milosz. Indeed, Johan is able to break Milosz down and trap him into his past - the trauma of knowing his mother abandoned him. Rationally, if he were able to look forward, he would know that he has a new family now, in the boys that befriended him. But because he was caught in Johan’s trap, the present doesn’t matter. Grimmer, though, was able to break through with one important assertion: that someone wanted him. True his mother may have abandoned him (or died, we don’t even know!) but so long as he looks forward instead of back, there will be people in the world he will meet that do want him, that do love him, that need him in their lives. He gives Milosz a goal: to find the people that can become his new family, instead of wallowing in the despair of not having his mother.

While I do think that Johan would have had the power to reach and break down Grimmer when he was younger, still more freshly out of Kinderheim and barely established as a person, the Grimmer of now is too grounded in his existence and forward-looking for Johan to be able to ensnare him. The only way I think he might have an angle on Grimmer is through Steiner, as Grimmer still expresses visible vulnerability about not being able to control that other side to himself, but I don’t think it would be enough to convince him that the world is full of despair. His connection to the world, even if manufactured some of the time, is too strong for Johan to crack.

I would have loved to see them have a proper discussion in the show, I think it could have been very insightful.

As an aside, I think it’s interesting to consider both Johan and Grimmer’s dialogues with Milosz as being somewhat self-reflective; Johan feels abandoned by his mother, and therefore unwanted in the world, while Grimmer holds onto the necessary belief that someone somewhere in the world wanted him to exist.

#naoki urasawa's monster #wolfgang grimmer #johan liebert #monster spoilers #monster analysis #the reason I consider Grimmer-Johan as a better foil than Johan-Tenma is mostly the core of what they differ on #like yeah all lives are equal / lives are only equal in death that's fine #but Grimmer and Johan have like...the core of what it is to be alive as the center of their conflict #Grimmer believes in the essence of living just for living's sake where johan is like well if there's no meaning then just die ig #also I'm sure this is super simplified LOL like there is definitely an argument to make that Grimmer could be chipped away at #but in the traditional way johan gets to people I don't think it would work #I do find it interesting to think about the pov of grimmer being turned to Johan's side...I wrote a fic from that angle once lol #just interesting thoughts #anyway grimmer is the best boy that's why I wrote this essay #thats my conclusion

[highfantasy-soul]

NATLA - Episode 4: Into the Dark (1/3)

[Masterlist of my NATLA thoughts]

An explanation of what I'm doing here and my history with ATLA.

Of course, full spoilers ahead.

<previous/next>

This completely picks up from last episode, so no chilling with the Gaang at the beginning. I know missing out on those hang-out sections of each episode was frustrating to some people, but honestly, I think the way they restructured the story makes sense. Combining elements from season 2 as well, to enhance the themes we're focusing on here, was a great move too - putting the Cave of Two Lovers plot in this episode and focusing on familial love was much better than pushing a Katara/Aang relationship right now. It's also a continuation of the theme of how people handle their trauma from the war and how they're finding ways to fight back. Add to that the idea that in a war, there are no easy choices - you have to compromise and do things you wouldn't otherwise do to survive and the Gaang is going to have to grapple with that (and grapple with the fact that everyone who HAS made compromises they wouldn't isn't necessarily their enemy).

I like that we get to have Aang and Iroh meeting again so soon - both imprisoned now. I think it was a good idea to quickly introduce the audience to the idea that Iroh may be fire nation, but he's got other stuff going on than just 'Capture Avatar to let firelord win the war".  It also seeds his and Zuko's relationship which I think was a great idea to flesh out in flash-backs. Seeing how they interacted before the events of the series makes their pairing feel more thought through than just Iroh tagging along for no apparent reason.

Love too, how we open Sokka's POV with him listening to Katara's warning and immediately questioning Sai and not going easy on him just because he identifies with the Mechanist. It builds on his and Katara's relationship that yes, they bicker and always argue over who's right in a situation, but they DO respect each others opinions in the end rather than being forced to confront reality when its shoved in their faces. And oh my gosh, Sokka's little voice shake when he tells Sai "Anything can be turned into a weapon in the wrong hands" - both he and Teo are so disappointed in Sai and the betrayal they have to feel knowing exactly how awful the fire nation is.

Bumi, I think, was the biggest swing the live-action took with re-interpreting a character. At first, I was skeptical as it's so different from the animated version, but I think with the themes we're looking to hit and the demographic who's watching the live-action vs cartoon, it does fit. Animated Bumi is….boy is he a cartoon character. I honestly think they could have toned down his cartoonishness in the live-action more and it would have felt better to me. I know everyone loves the iconic crazy king vibes, but it's just a lot for live action. I've also seen a comment about how they combined aspects of Jong Jong into him and I can really see that. In the animated series, he's a kooky king and there's no looming danger from the war - unlike in season 2 where everywhere in the Earth Kingdom, you see evidence of people struggling. I think bringing in that struggle already makes sense and is more consistent with the world building than pretending a century long war hasn't affected Omashu, the people, or the king in any way.

In the animated series, Bumi's job was to make Aang look at obstacles in a different way - none of his challenges were straight forward, but honestly, that's how Aang has always thought? Aang's whole deal as an airbender (as Toph explains in Bitter Work) is that he finds another way, an alternate route, not the straightforward one. It's a bit pedantic to outright tell the lesson that…is already shown through Aang's actions. (Yet again, I'm slamming my head into a brick wall at people complaining that the show 'is telling when they should be showing' and then complain that they don't tell something that's clearly shown through the whole series).

Bumi does give Aang that lesson real quick: "The right path is not always the direct path" but in the live action, Bumi is also teaching Aang another lesson, one that Aang doesn't already know - that of having to make difficult decisions and fight even when you don’t want to. Such a character choice in the animated show would have scared children and they probably wouldn't have understood the nuance of Bumi's argument, so the writers made it digestible for kids - a lesson that they can extrapolate on as they grow older. The live-action's more mature take on how war affects even fun-loving kids after a century adds to the urgency of the plot and seeds some level of dread at how the war will eventually influence Aang, our current fun-loving kid.

I think nixing Katara and Sokka from this plot and giving them other things to do was a good choice - in the animated version, they do literally nothing but stand there and get covered in rock candy, so giving the characters a journey of their own to complete while Aang takes care of the stuff with Bumi - and having them come in and save the day at the end - actually make's Bumi's assessment to Aang that "I think you're in good hands" actually make sense (as in the animated version, Bumi hasn't seen Sokka or Katara help out at all, again, they just stand there because this is Aang's episode for development). In the end, Aang and Bumi do get to share more than just the fun ride in the delivery system of Omashu, the addition of the bison whistle Aang uses for Appa being something Bumi made for him (reminding Bumi of his past and how important their friendship had been instead of just a random thing Aang bought at a random shop - which in hindsight is a really weird thing for a random shop to have - being a specifically bison-shaped whistle and all) deepened the lesson of 'you can count on your friends, and here's me calling on mine'.

In the first part of season 1 in the animated show, it's very, very easy to forget that the basis of the way the world is now was the genocide of Aang's people. How that trauma affects Aang comes and goes, with many episodes seeming like Aang has forgotten it entirely - which makes sense for a kid's show with so many episodes. You can compartmentalize a lot in that format and only bring back the trauma when it suits the plot for the current episode. The live-action sought to make Aang's trauma ever-present, at odds with his fun-loving and optimistic nature. While he feels the trauma deeply, he believes he can bring back the world he once knew and doesn’t want anyone to give into despair. I think keeping that through line helped make the live-action cohesive and form the foundation of Aang's character so it makes sense that there wouldn't be a solidly silly plotline in the live-action like there was in the animated show with Bumi.

While it can feel like people are being hard on Aang about him running away from his responsibilities when we know he didn't intend to run so far, imagine you're one of the people who expected the Avatar to show up and he just…didn't - for 100 years. It doesn't matter the 'reason', what matters is that he wasn't there and people suffered for it. I think it narratively still makes sense that people accuse him of running away even when that's not technically what he intended.

It's fun to see how, even in Bumi's case, the reappearance of the Avatar makes him fight again. From all accounts, he was neglecting his duties, just coasting by, and had given up and become jaded. He spent 100 years making impossible decisions and he was done - hence how he was willing to let the boulder crush him. But Aang's sheer presence gave him a bit of fight - he needed to say his piece, he didn't just listlessly let Aang go, he finally showed some more spirit - misguided though it was. His ending speech really turned the tide for me in my feelings about this interpretation of Bumi - and the message that 'we have to fight even when we don't want to' is much more important to teach Aang throughout the series as he has no issue looking at things another way, but his refusal to fight is a constant (that actually has inconsistencies in the animated version that people point out which weakens his final stand against killing Ozai) so I think making that the central message was good.

#natla #netflix atla #netflix avatar #avatar the last airbender

[miss-tc-nova]

Rather Than You - Cait Sith & Kitsune!Reader

I get the feeling this isn't exactly what you were looking for...but it's pretty on par for me. I actually had fun with this after finishing rebirth and I really REALLY love kitsune, so that was fun. But anyway, you've waited long enough so enjoy!

WARNING FOR FF7 REBIRTH SPOILERS!!!

Premise: Cait Sith gives his own life to save the others

Words: 1,788

~~~~~

               The journey together hasn’t been long, but it’s been the wildest ride. There have been reckless escapes, cautious subterfuge, and more close calls than I care to remember. Despite these harrowing events, I would do it all over again.

               Or at least I thought I would.

               Many would many would think me a fool for so quickly growing attached to the little animatronic. I learned the hard way that they were right. Our first encounter had me instantly charmed. That charisma broke through the stress and chaos of our mission, bringing smiles or even just sarcastic eye rolls. What’s more is that he listened, even when no one spoke.

               Long before Nanaki, I suffered the chains and needles of the mad doctor—all for simply existing. My magic, my body, my existence all became an eager fascination for dissection. There were traumas aplenty in that laboratory and I will never be the same free spirit I’d been all those decades ago.

               But Cait Sith brought back genuine smiles, even by accident. I didn’t need to speak a word, but he always knew just the ridiculous act to pull me from morbid ruminations. And when I did speak, he listened, waiting until just the right moment to say the right words. I never understood how an artificial creature could have such empathy, let alone for someone like me. We couldn’t be any more different, but thanks to him, I began to have hope again.

               Then came the betrayal. Watching the keystone fall into Shinra hands simply because we trusted him tore me apart. I wanted to scream, I wanted to tear him apart, I wanted to disappear. His actions cut deep and now I feel more alone than ever before.

               Even now, I haven’t quite come to terms with it, evident by the trial forced on me in the Hall of Resurrection. But there’s nothing I can do—there’s no time to cope. All I can do in this moment is forget who I am and move forward.

               My name shatters the delusions I’d thoughtlessly chased, giving me only a fraction of a second to avoid the claws closing down on me. Even then, I lose a few hairs at the end of one of my tails for my neglect.

               “Focus up!” Cloud demands, rushing past to swing at the massive wall demon.

               Though the man’s been acting out of sorts himself, he’s right—this is no time for self-pity. A shake of the head dislodges the distraction, hopefully, and I turn my full attention to the fight at hand.

               Twin tails flicker, multiplying to nine in their flurry. In my hands, flames the color of clear skies ignite. All this pent-up grief would serve me better in other ways.

               Walls crawl ever closer as we battle not one, but two of these monsters. I give all I have, hoping each burn I inflict will lighten the burden in my heart. It never does, but I fight on regardless.

               Golden light glitters on the floor, catching my eye. In its midst, entirely unaware in her concentration, stands Yuffie.

               There’s no second guessing what happens next. My body lurches forward at the single notion of getting her clear of the attach. It doesn’t matter how hard the collision is or that, while she falls clear of the attack, I don’t.

               An immense weight bears down on my leg before a powerful snap echoes in my ears. Pain sears through my muscles, tearing a scream from my mouth. Officially, I’m down and out for the rest of this fight, struggling to stay conscious against the agony.

               “I can’t mend the break, but I can help.”

               Warmth seeps into the pain, dissolving it bit by bit, until it becomes bearable enough to pry my eyes open. The demons are gone. All but Cloud shows me their concern, Aerith holding a gentle hand against my leg.

               “Thanks,” I breathe.

               She nods. “Can you stand?”

               The slightest movement sends fire through the limb and blurring my vision. “Not without help.”

               A shoddy splint stifles the shifting, at least allowing me to stand, but it’s Barret’s strength that helps me move forward.

               Ahead of us lies an altar where stands our ex-SOLDIER companion. As we make the last steps, the Temple trembles, Cloud seemingly unaffected by the chaos he’s caused. Aerith confirms that the Temple is crumbling around us, meanwhile Barret leaves my side, struggling with Cloud to replace the black materia. When that doesn’t work, grim reality spreads through the group.

               “I’m back—just in the nick o’ time!” A pair of fingers tip off the ear to me as if he wasn’t a traitor.

               I can only stare, utterly dumbfounded at the audacity of this cat to show his face again to the people he stabbed in the back.  But before Barret can put a few holes in him, Cait Sith rolls beneath the sinking altar, giving his all to keep it from collapsing.

               “Run—while there’s still time. Leave the heavy liftin’ to me!”

               Air hitches in my chest.

               “For real?” Barret asks, his own arm straining against the platform.  

               Aerith steps forward. “But what about you”

               “No need to fret about a bot like me. I wasnae built to last.” The cat’s knees quiver. “I wish I hadnae skipped leg day. Cannae hold out for long, so run…as if your lives depended on it!”

               Vincent makes his entrance, calling for us to follow him to the exit. The others begin to rush past me, meanwhile, I’m paralyzed in more ways than one.

               “Hey cat, ‘ppreciate it.” Barret’s hand releases the altar, leaving the struggling feline to bear its full weight.

               “Off with ya.”

               This is when I notice Barret coming straight for me. I choke past the lump in my throat.

               “No.”

               “C’mon.”

               “No!” I stumble in an attempt to back away from him.

               It takes the man very little effort to hoist me over his shoulder, all while my fists pound uselessly against his back. Watching Cait Sith grow farther and farther out of reach grips at my heart, the jerking feeling rattling my vision.

               “No! Cait!” I reach out in vain. “NO!”

               My heart surges forward as I race back for the cat.

               “Oi, what are ya doin’?! Get out of here!” he shouts.

               “I’m not done with you!” Tears slip past my anger.

               He peers up, the worry falling from his face. “Oh, I get ya.”

               “You…stupid cat!”

               “I know. I’m sorry.” Even his stuffed moogle doesn’t slow the altar’s progress all that much.

               This torture far exceeds whatever ache a broken leg could inflict. All this anger and grief mixed together pours forth completely out of my control as I scream at him.

               “Sorry doesn’t cut it! What were you thinking?! After everything we’ve been through, how could you do that to us?!”

               He grimaces as his legs give a little more, but then he turns a pure smile on me.

               “I was thinkin’…that, if someone had to get hurt, I’d rather it be Shinra…than any of you.”

               Even if the rage falters, there’s enough sorrow to take its place and keep the tears flowing.

               “I knew this place was dangerous…and that maybe we’d lose someone.” Those ears flop as he shakes his head. “But I couldnae stand the thought of that bein’ you.” His weak laugh is interrupted by his straining. “I know I could never hope to have a life as long as yours, but I’m honored to have had the pleasure of meeting you in the time I had.”

               A hand over my mouth doesn’t stifle the shuddering sob.

               “Cait…”

               “Now there’s a whole wide world out there. And I know it can be scary and dark and cruel…but people like you and the others make it worth savin’…So you go out there and save it and find the good that makes livin’ worthwhile.”

               My knees meet the stone just as his do. “Cait! Please!”

               “Just…remember me now and then…okay?”

               A hand shoots forward, passing right through the altar with no effect. There’s nothing I can do.

               The small bot begins to crumple. “It was a good run…while it lasted.”

               The moogle’s eyes begin blinking in error.

               “You did…what you could.”

               “Cait, no! Get up! Please!”

               “The rest is up to them.”

               Those are his last words. The altar finally reaches the ground and Cait Sith is gone.

               Pieces of the ceiling finally start to give way, crumbling around me. A massive section falls, bringing down Cait’s moogle, who reaches out to lay a hand on the altar. All while I watch, utterly useless.

               In the following moments, the Temple continues to collapse until finally, it all comes crashing down.

               My eyes snap open, a sharp breath filling my lungs. Dust billows past, clouding the dusk sky but clearing quickly.

               Careful, Barret lowers me onto the ground, the stabbing pain of my injury returning. “You alright? You passed out for a while.”

               Rubbing my eyes, I peer past him into the vast gaping hole where the Temple of the Ancients once stood. It doesn’t even compare to the emptiness creeping over me now.

               A sob rattles my chest.

               “Now that’s not a sight you see every day, eh?” 

               All gazes immediately fly back. Upon a large stuffed moogle stands a little crowned cat, proud of the entrance he’s made.

               Barret voices everyone’s confusion. “But you—we saw you!”

               His little boots meet the stone floor as he hops down. “If I popped my clogs, they’d be sobbin’ in the streets at the Saucer. This beautiful body’s but one of many!”

               The feline strolls right up to me, throwing his arms out, prepared for the embrace he knows I’m dying to give. Without hesitation, I snatch him up, arms tight and relieved tears flowing.

               Just as his face nuzzles against mine, I hear his words, soft and low.

               “You were his favorite.”

               My heart stops.

               He may look like Cait Sith, may talk and act like him—he may even have the same memories—but this is not my Cait Sith. We travelled and fought together. He was the one who spoke when I could not. He wove tales and sang lullabies when I was afraid to sleep. And now he’s well and truly gone.

               “Sephiroth.”

               This new Cait Sith gasps, wiggling free of my arms.

               “Get somewhere safe! Now!”

               I don’t protest or fight back when the massive moogle scoops me off the ground. Even as it hurries away, sending fresh waves of pain through my injured leg, I simply stare at the back of the cat, slowly coming to terms with the fact that I’d lost yet another person that I cared about.

#novas requests #gender neutral reader #cait sith #ffvii cait sith #ff7 cait sith #cait sith x reader #kitsune reader

[sisterofficerlucychen]

chenford + "look at me"

“Look at me.”

Hesitation lingers throughout her body as she fails to move. Every fiber in her being is aching to react, to meet his gaze and find the words that have been left unspoken. There’s so much to say, so much she wants to say to him except she can’t. Fear consumes her, an uncertainty that makes it easier to retreat than to move forward. He’s laid it all on the line, so clearly and simply that part of her wonders how it all became so entangled in the first place. He loves her. He loves her. So why isn’t it enough?

“Lucy.”

The pain behind his voice is evident, the way it’s threatening to crack and she doesn’t have to look up to know just how much she’s breaking his heart right now. She’s heard that desperation in his voice once before. Back when they meant nothing to each other, before she realized there so was much more to him than met the eye. When he was a husband pleading at his wife, when he ran into Isabel and so desperately still wanted to save her. It felt like a lifetime ago, like a memory that belonged to someone else because that Tim and the one before her did not feel like the same person.

“Tim.”

Somehow she’s able to say his name and that simple action surprises her enough to be able to meet his gaze. There’s a heaviness that weighs in her chest that pairs with the lump in her throat and stinging in her eyes as she fights back tears. He’s staring at her with the same expression, trying to remain composed though she can see right through it. The way he’s also holding back tears, the way his lip curls into a frown, how his shoulders drop in defeat. He looks so incredibly vulnerable and broken that she has to stop herself from wrapping her arms around him. She hates herself for doing this to him, for breaking them apart before they even had a chance to be a ‘them’.

“I’m sorry, I can’t, I—“

She can’t say she doesn’t love him back because it’s a lie. One that she thought she’d become convincingly good at denying but really was just Lucy lying to herself rather than the world around her. He knows she loves her, there’s no point in denying it because it’s become too big to ignore. She’s shown him time and time again just how much she loves him, actions and words that have held as much weight as an “I love you”. She’s seen him at his lowest, been beside him through the hardships and struggles. There has never been a doubt in her mind that that’s where she’s belonged every time.

Except that felt so much different than this. Helping him through Isabel’s addiction, being beside him as he confronted the trauma his father had put him in, staying by his bedside after his surgery — all of that she could easily akin to being a good friend, being a good person. The difference between then and now was that he hadn’t been in love with her. At least she thinks he wasn’t because of how unsure she is of when she fell in love with him.

It happened so seamlessly and without warning that it’s why she’s so damn scared because she doesn’t know when it happened. It’s what has her running, the reason why she’s breaking both their hearts because of how foreign the feeling is that she doesn’t know how to process it. It’s unlike anything she’s ever experienced and she knows she’s never felt this way for anyone else before. No one has mattered as much as Tim does.

The stakes are so high that it’s impossible for her to feel like she can jump and safely land. It’s so incredibly frustrating that this is when her mind and body decide to betray her, that instead of being able to say those three little words back, she’s suddenly emotionally stunted. It’s impossible for her to make sense of how she’s able to be such an open book and yet with this, she shut off. Even more so, that she knows why and isn’t able to vocalize it to help him understand because she can see it in his eyes, the way he’s forming one thought with another and concluding that she’s rejecting him.

Maybe not an accurate assumption but given Lucy’s reaction and reluctance to even respond, a fair one. Is she rejecting him? Truthfully, she’s unsure. The paralyzing fear that’s taken over has her thinking and acting irrationally. She’s trying to make sense that they in love and figure out why it’s so terrifying, that she can’t move past it. There’s so much to gain and yet her fear has her focused on what she could lose.

“I love you but I can’t."

It feels like an eternity later that she’s able to find words except they feel more like a goodbye than anything else because she doesn’t wait for him to respond before she turns to walk away. she’s letting him go much like he once did and it’s as she walks away that she realizes his was a selfless act, to set her free and let her grow; whereas she’s doing it for selfish reasons, to keep herself safe despite how much it physically hurts to walk away. somehow determining that it’s easier to suppress it all than to take a chance at something real.

#the rookie #tim bradford #lucy chen #chenford #fanfic #me to me: bitch wtf is wrong with you #i feel like i chose angst and violence and for what?? #i had midnight rain (piano version) on repeat - the one on tiktok - and i fully blame that for this #i hope this makes sense aokdajfd

[songbirds-of-halcyon]

We got our more detailed medical records and guess what we have. You won’t fucking believe this.

First of all, we have several instances of being described as “not having a personality”, “hearing voices”, “identity confusion”, etc.

We have one letter stating various things we’ll pick out. We’re replacing our legal name with Halcyon and fixing the misgendering btw.

“Halcyon’s main areas of concern were that people do not accept that he has experienced trauma in the past.” They said this because I told them they were ignoring and not helping at all with the trauma.

“Following an extended assessment, it became clear that Halcyon’s difficulties are complex, not least because they are inflicted by Autism, which leads to very concrete thinking.” This was said because I wouldn’t take “we’ll treat you before we even consider diagnosing you/learning about your symptoms/treating you like a person” for an answer.

(HERE’S THE BEST ONE) “Halcyon’s sense of himself is very unintegrated, which leads to splitting off feelings and emotional states and giving them names and personalities, which Halcyon experiences as independent of himself.” Uh-oh! Someone’s describing a system! -_- Unintegrated identity, huh? Wonder what that could be. Nothing comes to mind /sar

They also openly call others in the system “personalities” in the letter btw. MPD? Never heard of it lol. /sar

Psychosis and “serious mental illness” was ruled out. I guess I’m demon possessed then.

They tried to say I (🌸) created them to help me “gain an understanding of how/why we developed this view of myself”, which was funny because I’m not the original host.

The second letter: S is my other, non-NHS therapist, btw. I don’t want to share her name here

“S fed back that she had started some solution-focused work with Halcyon around accepting Halcyon’s view that he has multiple identities and using and developing his strengths within these to help him move forward and achieve his goals.” This is just sceptical-talk for S has been talking to us like people and actually addressing the issue instead of pretending it’s “autism hallucinations” or whatever the fuck CAHMS are doing. You’d think this would be a good thing, no? A therapist is helping a trauma victim heal from their trauma and achieve goals in their life without fear or pain! Well, CAHMS has other opinions. CAHMS says…

“Halcyon seems to be more engaged in this way of working with S, rather the work being more about trying to challenge the existence of different personalities.” That’s right; because S isn’t encouraging me to drive the system to panic and possibly death again, it’s “not working”. Because S is doing her job and actually helping in a way that didn’t cause us to split 60+ times (I’m not even fucking joking), she’s wrong. CAHMS “method” literally almost caused me to go dormant, several near-deaths, months worth of doubt to the point where I was fucking banned from fronting because multiple of us including myself were so dangerously close to fucking up our own life permanently, and accusing us of being created/imaginary/hallucinations/lies/etc. And guess what, NONE OF IT WORKED!! I don’t understand why they keep trying to disprove it when everything they’ve done has failed, and they’ve by definition alone almost diagnosed me with DID already!! We’ve been so much happier dealing with this shit alone tbh.

S has been our main therapist for over 5+ years. We’ve been seeing her since we were 12. Our old host told her about the system before I even existed. Of course we fucking trust her, she’s known us for longer than any of the doctors at CAHMS, and she’s also just better at her job honestly (in more ways that just related to this).

Also CAHMS had a few comments about our C-PTSD. Apparently we:

Don’t have PTSD, but we do have…

Traumagenic synesthesia (which isn’t a thing)

Traumagenic gender dysphoria (trauma started at age 6 and we came out as trans at 3 so either we’re a time traveller or someone’s crap at their job)

And Traumagenic homosexuality! No, I am not fucking joking, this is in my actual literal medical records!!

Oh, and also developmental trauma, which is the CAHMS way of saying “yeah you have C-PTSD but we don’t wanna call it that bc we don’t wanna treat you”.

They also claimed that autism causes auditory hallucinations (hearing voices) and identity confusion (alters). Gotta love 60+ year old doctors who haven’t done any catch-up courses, am I right?

So yeah, CAHMS is a joke.

-🌸

#🌸 #the songbirds sing #system stuff #I sorry I’m just annoyed. we actually had a good day today. we’ll get to that in the next post.

[dcwnthercbbithcle]

📁📁📁 for Sally, Evan, Jesse <3 🥰

SEND 📁 FOR ONE SMALL (OR RANDOM) HEADCANON ABOUT MY CHARACTERS || NOT ACCEPTING

Of all the things the afterlife threw at her, blindness (or near-blindness rather) was by far one of the least mortifying ordeals she found herself rising in the face of. In fact, even if she hadn’t died, she’d expected that she would find herself blind eventually— by her 60s if she was being optimistic, though realistically, it would likely be gone no later than her 55 birthday.

See, Sally had or rather has degenerative Myopia. It started in her late 20s, but has continued to progress, year by year. If anything, she figures it’s been slow coming, after all, she’s now entering her 40s and still seeing with the aid of her glasses, though her prescriptions have been getting stronger and stronger.

The painful truth, however, was that no matter how the prescriptions had been helping keep the status quo. They had an expiry point, a point of no return when they couldn’t help any longer, and the end result would be the same: she would lose her sight and she needed to be prepared. It stung but she knew there was nothing to be gained from the denial and had taken to learning braille and researching the resources available to the blind for when that day finally came and her sight finally gave way to a vague, shifting blur of color and light.

Evan is SEVERELY claustrophobic. It all goes back to that day in the mines, rocks cascading down and men screaming. Even though it’s far beyond him, every enclosed space leaves him feeling back between those rocks, pinned in, unable to move or scream. And the panic sets in quick, not with sobbing or hyperventilation but anger— screaming anger.

All the adrenaline comes forward with one goal: escape and breath. He needs to free himself from the right space to breath, he needs to get out no matter what and no matter what stands in the way. If I had to compare it to anything, it would be the way a drowning man will drag down anything and anyone in his reach for even the slightest breath of air.

Evan is, however, DEEPLY ashamed of both this fear and his reaction to it. When the adrenaline crashes, he’s left feeling hollow and shameful— but at the end of the day, he’ll still do very little to try and work through it, or even acknowledge it. He feels resigned to the phobia from his trauma, unable to work through it and almost like it’s a kind of punishment for him: as though the fear and the panic and making others see him differently is some just desserts. Which needless to say is neither constructive or a healthy outlook on the situation.

ALSO JESSE!!!! Okay, this guy, THIS. FUCKING. GUY. He is a dog dad, not just like a ‘he likes dogs and takes zeal in caring for them,’ no, he is a Dog Dad (derogatory). He may care and feel very little for humans, but animals hold his heart in a vice grip and his pooches are akin to both children and his best friends. And on that note, he has two! Two rescue pit bulls, both absolute babies, named Tinkerbell and Wendy. They are always on his heel, following behind him with love and he lives for it. He’ll dress them both up in matching outfits with him, he has special clothes to protect them from the elements, they get a raw diet and hell! He runs an Instagram for them too!

[jcvdraws]

“Easy to stand back from the end of a tragedy and say how it could have been done differently”

I’ve seen several people (whether they’re happy about it or not) referring to a “redemption arc” for Niall Lynch in Greywaren. At the very least I feel that this is mislabeling his storyline because it implies he went through some kind of process to become a better person on page, which is not what happened. What happened is we got new information about a character that has never been alive on-page in the first place. This dude didn’t get a “redemption arc”, he’s still dead and everything we saw involving him happened a long time ago in the context of the story. Even the stuff we knew of him before happened a long time ago.

I understand people probably mostly mean this in a tongue-in-cheek way—maybe it’s more that people feel he’s meant to be “redeemed” to us as readers and and I’m being a little picky about language. But I still don’t think this is the lens through which it is most useful to view this story. Thing is, we really never got to see the old, living Niall Lynch in real time before now. What we got in Greywaren is his backstory, and Mor’s; the whole (or at least a more whole) Lynch family story that we never had, from their perspective. I’d argue it’s not about “Niall good, actually” or “Niall bad, always has been” it’s about “life is complicated” and “everyone has a story” and, most importantly, finally looking at all the things that hurt to look at in order to open yourself up to living life differently than you have before. This is, of course, just my personal reading, but we’re gonna talk about it like it’s the only one for a sec. Further elaboration starring Declan Lynch under the cut:

Declan’s line “Easy to stand back from the end of a tragedy and say how it could have been done differently” sums it up best, I think. In the end it’s not about “surprise, Niall Lynch was a good dad, actually!” At all. It’s about the nuance of family trauma, of life in general, of how complicated people and their stories are, how individuals each work differently with the tools they’ve got. And in the end it’s Declan making peace with the complexity that got him where he is so he can move forward.

Because, the thing is, Declan was good at feeling the hurt from his past and the resentment for it, but he wasn’t good at feeling the pain and grief of loss. And that’s what he needed to do to move from the terrified person he was to someone ready to live and love and change his life for the better. He was good at seeing the bad in everything and everyone—that was the anxiety. It was him trying to protect himself from further loss, further pain, by keeping him in protective mode. He was so good at seeing the bad, or potential for it, that it stopped him from seeing any of the good, and not just the good of the past, the good of the present and most of all the potential good of the future. Or, even more than that, how the future could be different than what had come before. He was hardwired for sussing out threats in order to survive rather than actually living his life. His over-protectiveness for his family was his over-protectiveness of himself. It was his way of protecting himself from further emotional pain, while at the same time bracing for the potential of pain around every corner. It wasn’t just him--every other character had their own ways of protecting themselves that eventually looped right back around on them and stopped being protective and started being hurtful too.

How I read this book, each character had to heal by going headfirst into what they most feared and had most avoided. And for Declan it was his childhood memories and the love he still had for his father, his mother, his brothers, how his family used to be, because facing the grief over losing his family, his happy childhood, was more painful than feeling resentment toward them. At a certain point, it was more painful for him than believing it all had been terrible, always. And the thing is, it grew and bred resentment for his brothers too, because he was so focused on preventing himself from feeling further loss by potentially losing them that he wasn’t able to experience the love and care and openness with them that he and they clearly wanted. It’s not about whether or not his resentment, or anger, or frustration toward his family was ever justified in any way. It’s about what he was denying himself by denying the feelings within him that weren’t resentment and anger, because acknowledging those feelings would have meant acknowledging the full scale of his pain, and he wasn’t ready for that, until he was.

In the end it was all about Declan finally, finally cracking himself open and finally being vulnerable again! And that’s crazy, that’s beautiful, that’s everything!! To understand that life is complex and that opening up to the pain of loss can, paradoxically, make living life feel a lot less like an endless wheel of suffering is life-changing. Honestly I’m not interested in whether Niall Lynch was a “good” parent. I do appreciate learning more about him through Declan’s trek through his and Mor’s memories. I do appreciate that his story from his perspective is different than what we would get from Ronan’s or Declan’s perspectives. Because that’s life! And maybe it’s because I was never super invested in seeing him as a terrible dude (or a good one) that I don’t feel the need to interrogate his morality in the face of what the rest of the story has to offer. I’m much more interested in Declan finding the courage to experience his full range of emotions again, and to allow himself AND others to be vulnerable, both emotionally and physically, because that’s a scary, painful thing to do, but it’s brave and—ultimately—worth it on the other side.

#greywaren spoilers #tdt #Declan Lynch #Niall Lynch #long post #the dreamer trilogy #this is kind of a ramble idk how comprehensive it is #it's just my thoughts based on my interpretations on the first read-through of course! #i always get different things out of the same story with each re-read so i wont be surprised if my interpretations shifts in the future

[rhpsdys]

president raine thoughts below — partial spoilers but also partial not because i've been talking about this for months now.

we saw a bunch of the coven heads quite literally attempt to seize the throne (lol) only to be stopped by darius && eber. we don't get a clear sense of what the power structure in the isles is now, but there are a few things we do:

no one jumped directly into the top leadership role

it's not eda, she's the new school headmaster

it's not lilith, she's focusing on the library, and being a historian (i'll make a post about that later, as it pertains to raine && the bard library)

there's no indication that darius, who is the other person i can see taking charge, actually is in that leadership role

raine's new outfit is extremely regal

raine was hanging out apparently overseeing the coven sigil removal, which feels to me like something they wouldn't have a reason to be there for (past their own) unless they were there as a leader. you know?

so, this is how i see it happening. honestly, it's not much different from what i've said before.

a week or so after the (main) events of the episode, the coven heads meet to discuss their plan moving forward. the question comes up of whether or not hunter has any "right" to the throne. raine && darius point out that they shouldn't be having this conversation without him, so he's called in to join them. opinions are pretty split. some think he shouldn't even be there, && certainly shouldn't have any proximity to leadership. others feel like he is technically the rightful successor. in the end, one thing is clear, however: he's far too young, && even if he wanted that role (he doesn't), he needs to focus on being a kid from now on, not to mention working through all the trauma.

so they're back to square one again. "should it even be one of us?" "do we have the right to make that decision for everyone?" "could we even get everyone to vote?" "it'll be chaos if we let anyone nominate themselves"

in the end, they decide that at least for now, in order to preserve some semblance of familiar structure, leadership of the boiling isles will remain among the nine of them. once things have settled, they'll re-evaluate, and leave it to the people to vote on a leader. but for now, it has to be one of them, with the other eight + hunter acting as counsel members, so no one has absolute power. they each pick one person to nominate, && it can't be themselves.

of the nine + hunter, one voted for darius, one voted for hettie... && eight voted for raine. raine protested very much, expression explicit disinterest in that sort of responsibility or power, but of course it's darius who says, "the only good leaders are the ones that hate being in charge", && well... that settles it. so raine agrees on the condition that they will not accept the title of 'emperor', so it has to be something else, && they will only stay in power until the isles have fully been rebuild && things are steady.

the people of the isles accept them warmly.

in the end, the job becomes 'president' rather than emperor, though most just refer to raine as 'head witch'... which is honestly more comfortable for them. && despite their dislike of public speaking, they make a fine leader — charismatic, involved, passionate, && deeply caring.

&& when the time comes, shortly after what we see in the timeskip, raine steps down a new leader is elected, && raine settles into their new life with eda.

#out of. #headcanon. #wad spoilers /

[urdearestmom]

i feel like the reason why mike is so hated by the fandom is that the writers ideolize him a lot and then just don't write him to meet those expectations.

like he's supposed to be the heart, the glue, the hero. and then they make him ignore his friends for eight months. like. what the fuck is up with that??? do they expect me to belive that???

like his behaviour could be explained by all the trauma he's gotten that lead to behavioural issues or something but even that wasn't acknowledged or put as a possibility so far.

and apologising wouldnt really do anything because every single one of his apologies lead to little to nothing changing.

and it makes me so mad because like the way his character is portrayed in earlier seasons and what his friends think of him doesn't really align with that yk? and everyone just hates my protegee mike wheeler because the writers did him dirty.

i feel like he's to worried abt el. which makes sense. all the sense in the world and im not saying he shouldn't. but make him worry abt the rest of his friends out loud too??? especially will??? most of his interactions with people who were not el were just sending will deeper into the friendzone and treating him kinda badly after apologising to him for doing exactly that and it's like. no. he wouldnt do that. wtf.

if i can get past everything wrong that happened in vol2 then i like it. i like it a lot. but seriously????

(i am not blaming this on mike, im blaming this on the writers if that wasn't clear)

I really liked vol 2 but I do have some bones to pick and this is one of them!

Mike gets a lot of flack because he's too complicated an individual to be an immediate fan favourite, the way El is for example. Not to say that she isn't also a complex character, because she DEFINITELY is, just in different ways. A lot of his motivations aren't clear (as opposed to El, whose motivations ARE clear and easy to understand. They have to be because the story doesn't move forward without her) and I don't know if that's because the writers are bad at writing him or if it's on purpose and it's Mike himself who doesn't actually even recognize what's going on with him.

I do think this is a symptom of plot-driven storytelling rather than character-driven. There's so much going on in the plot that they don't have the time to get into each character in depth. What ends up happening is that the characters are used to further the plot instead of the plot happening because of character actions. It starts to cheapen some characters and they become flat (a flat character is a character with little to no complex emotions, motivations, or personality. They also don't undergo any kind of change to make them more well-rounded). I think that's what's starting to happen to Mike and it SUCKS because I love him so much he's great!! They just made him so difficult to understand and then he doesn't have enough screentime to fully be developed (again because there is so much going on in the plot that this just isn't possible). And I get it because he's not the main, but in that case could they make the shorter screentime he has more meaningful?

He definitely does have trauma because they all do. There's no way you can come away from all the shit they've been through unscathed! I've said this on this page before, Mike has seen so much shit and literally nobody ever asked him how he felt about it. Tbh he probably wouldn't even answer completely because when does Mike ever talk about his feelings, but still. A LOT of the way he is is completely reasonable for someone his age who's been through the shit he's been through. People are difficult sometimes. He's also been bullied basically his whole life and I'll tell y'all right now that shit takes a toll on you. I'm 22 and I still struggle with certain things because I spent my whole childhood being bullied too. The writers are just choosing not to address any of it when it's not relevant to the plot because- you guessed it- plot-driven storytelling does that. All the other things that need to happen in the limit of 9 episodes make showing each character's struggles impossible, and since Mike isn't central to the plot (like El always is, and like how Max was this season) he doesn't get to have any of his problems really delved into. The only thing that gave a little insight to his psyche was the Lois Lane bit, but I could write a whole other post about that. I probably will at some point 🤷🏻‍♀️

But you're right when you say he was TOO worried about El and nothing else. He absolutely should have been worried about her and it makes total sense that he was because she's his girlfriend and he's in love with her, but there are other people he cares about too. The only time he really showed that was in episode 4 when the agents were explaining what happened and he said, "My family lives in Hawkins!" Nothing after that, about his family or his friends.

I think Mike as a person definitely was thinking about everybody else, they just didn't show it because that wasn't relevant to the point of his character this season. The whole point of Mike's character this time around was literally just to help El fight Vecna and make Will sadder, lmao. I was waiting for that moment where he usually snaps into action and starts leading everybody into battle with some deranged ass plan! Left me disappointed because it didn't really happen. The Cali crew going to Suzie was like a watered down version of that. I loved the Mileven moments season 4 gave us, but it's still a total disservice to him because people are more than their relationships, but there's that plot-driven storytelling again. Mike IS the heart, he IS the glue, you can tell by the small things his friends say about him or the way they react to him. He just doesn't look like it anymore because the writers don't have the time to show it since they're so busy doing everything else.

Another thing is also that the majority of people who watch this show aren't sitting here analyzing everything. Even if you are a fan, you don't typically think super in depth about characters that aren't your fave (I don't anyway. The only characters I really really think about a lot are Mike, El, and Max). What that can lead to is taking characters at face value instead of thinking about what their reasons for doing/saying a certain thing might be. It makes sense why people are annoyed by/dislike him, though, because he does make a ton of mistakes and he never gets a chance to explain himself properly because the writers don’t give him one :/ Everything is nuanced, people aren't black and white. And it's fine really because this is a tv show and these people are fictional but it does say something about how we react to others around us. Cancel culture is an insidious thing and I think that has a little bit to do with why so many people don't like Mike.

As usual y'all this is me rambling completely unedited so forgive me if it's incoherent LMAO

Thanks for this! Mike Wheeler will be my baby forever even if the writers keep doing him dirty 🥰 that's what my fanfictions are for

#brainzz #ask #answered #stranger things #mike wheeler #urdearestmom