#did I completely forget that I have this saved in my drafts because I was too busy being gay for bond 12

[chelseeebe]

still into you

after abruptly leaving hawkins (and you) seven years ago, eddie munson, ex-boyfriend turned rockstar, makes a grand return. how will things pan out when your lives couldn’t be further apart?

this has been in the drafts for god knows how long and you can definitely tell where my writing started to improve as i came back to it.. hope y’all enjoy anyway! this is so long good lord. also includes a bit of bestfriendism with stevie!

18+. mdni. smut. mentions of alcohol. eddie is a dickhead. no use of y/n!

read part two here.

‎♡‧₊˚

‘you know he’s coming back next weekend?’ steve mutters, nodding towards you as you rip the sellotape from the brown box, beginning to stack the cans of soup.

‘is he? oh my god oh my god,’ feigning excitement with a straight face.

you’d already known he was coming back, you’d received the invitation just like everybody else. except, you’d swiftly put the gimmicky piece of paper into the trash and got on with your day. confused why everyone else seemed to be losing their goddamn minds over it.

he huffs quietly, helping you with the heavy tins, ‘are you gonna go?’ steve didn’t actually work in melvalds but came in on his breaks purely to chat and distract you from your work.

‘am i gonna go? hmm, let me think.. no.’

‘he wants to see you.. you should come,’ prodding his elbow into your side, collapsing the box into a flat piece of cardboard.

‘you spoke to him?’ ears perking up. you didn’t care if he’d mentioned you. no, really.

‘yeah.. he called a few weeks ago, y’know when the invitations got sent out,’ picking up the next box to start filling the shelf.

‘oh! it’s nice to know he called you and just hilarious to know i never got a phone call,’ getting frankly quite sick of hearing about eddie fucking munson and his grand return.

once upon a time, eddie had actually been your boyfriend. must’ve been 7 or so years ago by this point.. anyway, that was before he’d got his big break and decided that he was going to completely forget about hawkins.. and about you. you’d still been together after his first tiny tour, excitedly waiting for him to come home when he just.. never did.

he’d had the decency to at least call and tell you that he was breaking up with you.. we’re just in different places right now.. it’s not you.. i don’t want you to ruin your life waiting for me..

it was essentially a whole bunch of bullshit, because the very next month he was spotted with some bottle blonde model looking suspiciously close at some club he’d have absolutely hated the year prior. it was like a punch to the gut, flicking through the pages of the trashy magazine just knowing that you hadn’t been enough for this new lifestyle of his.

from then on, you’d decided to disengage with any and everything about him. turning the tv off when corroded coffin came on one of the morning talk shows, leaving the room at parties when one of his song’s inevitably came on and just completely blanking out of the conversation when his name was brought up. it was easier that way, saved your feelings and the awkward glances you’d get.

at some point things had become slightly more complicated and you’re not sure how exactly it had happened but you had wound up pregnant. and by jason carver no less. maybe it was your shared disdain for eddie that had brought you together. who knows?

but it had happened and now you had to deal with it. and although jason may come in a close second to world’s biggest assholes.. you had gained a beautiful daughter from it all and had become quite content with your single mom life.

people had come and gone, robin jetting off to some fancy college in california.. jonathan and nancy ending up in new york at some hot-shot newspaper.. the kids you’d sort of gathered had all gone off to various colleges, becoming adults themselves. all except for steve.

steve had stayed in hawkins like you, begrudgingly following his father’s footsteps, getting a job at his accounting firm. it was good money and kept his dad happy so he couldn’t fault it really. he’d even got his own place just down the street from your house and at some point you’d just accepted that he was probably your only friend in hawkins.

it had brought the two of you undeniably closer and maybe you’d even call him your best friend now. well, except for right now as he was beginning to piss you off with all this fussing over eddie.

‘you have to come.. it’s not just for him, everyone is going.. it’s a reunion,’ steve continues to pester you despite your efforts to shut him down.

‘steve, i’m not going and that’s that.’

he sighs, staring at you with a blank expression, ‘okay, well.. i’ll tell him it’s a maybe,’ checking his watch before frowning, ‘shit, i’m late.. i’ll see you later,’ throwing the empty cardboard to the floor before dashing off down the aisle, giving you an exaggerated wave as he disappears.

you just knew that he was not going to drop this until you agreed to go. but he could kick and scream as much as he liked, you had absolutely zero desire to go this flimsy reunion and even less desire to see eddie in the flesh.

-

it’s another dull week of stacking shelves and managing a team of absolute morons and before you know it, it’s the day before that fucking reunion and steve is still as incessant as ever that you must go.

‘my mom can look after ella.. please just come,’ he sounded like he was a second away from getting on his knees to actually beg you to go.

you’d started to just ignore him now, getting on with whatever you were doing, choosing to give him the silent treatment. he hated that.

‘you’re so annoying,’ he scoffs, still helping you unbox the bags of chips, ‘will you just come for five minutes.. you don’t even have to talk to eddie, it’s the first time we’ll all be together again.. puh-leaseee,’ breaking into a weird sort of sing-song tone.

you exhale through your nose, visibly frustrated by the man, ‘i’m going to ban you in a minute,’ raising your eyebrows, taking the same tone you used when ella was being a brat.

‘no you won’t,’ furrowing his brows, ‘what if i promise to stand in between you the whole night? i’ll beat him with a stick if he even tries to talk to you,’ completely serious with what he just said.

you chortle, covering your mouth as one of the elderly customers walks past, slightly bewildered by the noise that just escaped your mouth, ‘couldn’t you just beat him with a stick anyway?’

‘ehh.. not really, he is paying for the whole thing,’ straightening the bags of air he’d just placed on the shelf, ‘i mean, i could if you really want me to.’

you roll your eyes, of course he was. he’d rented the fanciest restaurant just outside of town for your gaggle of pals. any chance to flaunt the fact that he’d made it out of this hell hole and left the rest of you in the dirt.

‘i have a child, steve, i can’t just go out and leave her at home.. some of us aren’t free like you are,’ turning to face him with a stern hand on your hip.

‘i just told you my mom’ll look after her.. she hasn’t seen her in so long and.. and you can stay at mine and i’ll take you to her first thing in the morning,’ his eyes are round, glimmering in the harsh overhead lights.

‘i don’t have anything to wear,’ shrugging, you really didn’t. becoming a mother isn’t quite so glamorous and a lot of clothes you’d once fit into had become a little tight.

‘when d’you finish?’

narrowing your eyes at him, ‘two..’

‘great.. okay well, i’ll take a half-day and we can go shopping.. on me,’ wiggling his eyebrows at you. the thing about steve is that he believes that most problems can be solved by throwing money at it.

he wasn’t wrong, of course.

because you reluctantly agree to go shopping with him on the condition that you weren’t definitely going to this thing. you were just going to try on dresses. that was it.

-

you get a cab to the restaurant, there was no way in hell you were doing this sober nor did you want to subject steve to being sober for your sake. palms clammy as you clamber out of the vehicle, immediately regretting your decision.

no one would care if you didn’t go, right? you could quite easily just get back into the taxi and go home without forcing yourself to endure the night.

steve’s one step ahead of you, grabbing your hand so you can’t run away. throwing him an awful glare but you weren’t really mad, just annoyed that he’d succeeded in persuading you to come.

‘c’mon.. it won’t be so bad once you’re in there,’ smoothing down his fresh shirt as he begins to walk up the winding path, dragging you along behind him.

he’s wrong. it’s so much worse inside. the place was huge, extravagantly decorated and full of people you’d once regarded as your best friends, all too busy in their own conversations to notice you and steve walk in.

it wasn’t like you hadn’t heard from them, it had just been through occasional letters and christmas cards rather than seeing them face to face. robin would call sometimes, fill you in on whatever she had been up to and beg to speak to ella who absolutely loved it. you were sure they were on the same wavelength.

you look to steve with wary eyes, digging your fingertips into his hand, ‘we could just leave right now.. no one would even know,’ tugging gently on his arm.

‘hey,’ he whispers, ‘it’s okay.. look, robin’s coming over, we’ll say hi and see how you feel,’ using his spare hand to wave at the bubbly girl, dropping your hand to give her a hug.

‘oh my god,’ she rushes, ‘how are you? you look so good.. and i don’t mean you,’ pulling away from steve to throw her arms around you, her gentle hands rubbing on your back.

‘hah, it’s nice to see you too,’ steve rolls his eyes, grabbing two of the champagne flutes being ferried around by fancy waiters.

she pulls back, ‘i didn’t think you were coming.. how are you doing? how’s ella?’ the words falling out of her mouth at super speed, it was as if her mouth moved before her brain did.

‘i wasn’t gonna but i wanted to see you guys,’ you nod, taking the glass from steve’s outstretched hand and taking a lengthy sip, ‘i’m okay.. ella’s okay.. you’ll have to come and see her before you leave.’

‘i will i will! i literally landed like two hours ago and had to rush but i’m back until friday,’ her hands flying around as she spoke, ‘come and say hello..’ her arm intertwines with yours as she leans in closer to your ear, ‘he’s staring y’know..’

your eyes roll back on their own, not even wanting to search the room for him, ‘i’m not speaking to him so he can stare all he likes,’ straightening up as you approach the group robin had left.

nancy’s talking to max about something in incredible detail but is quite to stop when you approach, mouth in a small ‘o’ as she hugs you, ‘you came? i thought we were gonna miss you,’ grinning wide when she pulls back.

you give an overdramatic sigh, ‘of course i had to come.. you’d all miss me too much,’ waving to the rest of the group.

there are a lot of small pleasantries swapped, asking about their journey’s here and how they’d been.. standard small talk. but then el asks to see a picture of ella, ecstatic that their names were so similar. you’d come prepared, pulling the creased picture out of your bag.

they all gush and coo over her, it was a picture you’d snapped from her first day of kindergarten, cheesing with her pigtails and pink hair bobbles. passing it around the gathered group, still steadily sipping on the bitter champagne.

‘who’s that?’ eddie asks, you hadn’t noticed him sidle over to the crowd, stood peering over lucas’ shoulder at the photograph.

your eyes meet his, seeing his face for the first time in what felt like centuries. he looked older, obviously, still sporting the same long curls except now it actually looked as if it’d been styled. he’s in a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up, forearms now littered with tattoos and a nice looking watch. your heart just about stops beating when you realise you’ll now have to explain exactly who that is.

‘uh.. that’s ella,’ you nod, not quite meeting his eyes, ‘..my daughter,’ taking the photo from lucas’ hand, the atmosphere had quite suddenly shifted and people begin to scatter, starting their own conversations so they don’t have to bare witness to this one.

‘oh.. oh, right.. well, congratulations then,’ the shadow of a smile on his lips, could he feel how fucking awkward this was?

‘thank you,’ giving him a half nod, startled as steve’s hand brushes the small of your back. he’d seen that you were in conversation and had left dustin to fulfil his security guard promise.

‘it’s nice that you two found each other.. you have a beautiful daughter,’ still not fully committed to smiling but he was getting there.

your face contorts, immediately looking to steve before letting out a god awful cackle, ‘oh no.. she’s not steve’s,’ covering your mouth before another taunting laugh comes out.

steve is trying to stifle his grin but fails, reaching his hand out to shake eddie’s hand, ‘ah man, no ella’s not mine but she is beautiful, isn’t she? how are you?’

you’re eternally grateful that he he’s managed to sway the conversation and you aren’t forced to explain why or how you’d had a child with jason fucking carver. turning back to robin as you hear steve ramble on about work and corroded coffin’s new album, something you had absolutely no care about.

‘shall we get another drink?’ robin asks, eyeing the open bar and your empty glass.

‘please.’

the rest of the night is going.. relatively well. it’s kinda unsettling to watch the younger kids drink legally, getting more boisterous and loud as the night progresses. it’s nice, if not a little sad just thinking about how you weren’t really able to enjoy yourself at their age because you had a newborn.

you must’ve been deep in thought as you don’t even notice eddie creep up to the empty table, standing awkwardly besides your chair, ‘can we talk?’

your eyes shoot up to meet his, baffled by his presence, ‘what could we possibly have to talk about?’

he exhales through his nose, ‘uh.. a lot? we don’t have to do it here.. i have a room upstairs or.. outside?’

‘no,’ gripping onto your glass of wine, desperately trying to grab the attention of someone behind eddie to come and save you, ‘i don’t want to speak to you.’

he’s exasperated, clutching onto his beer with strained white knuckles. how were you ever supposed to move past this when you wouldn’t even give him the opportunity to explain himself. but that was exactly it. you didn’t care about any of the silly excuses you’re sure he’d conjured up, he did what he did and that was that.

‘i’m trying here..’ sounding exasperated, ‘how ‘bout dinner? sometime this week, on me,’ his voice is deeper now, raspier. you figure as a result of constant partying and chain smoking while on tour.

‘i have a child and a job.. i don’t have time for dinner with you on top of that,’ swallowing the rest of the sweet white wine, putting the empty glass back on the table with a forceful slam.

you make brief eye contact with will who was passing behind eddie and decide to take the opportunity to pounce, standing from your chair and rushing over the second he nears your table.

‘will.. hey,’ speeding to catch him up, mouthing a small save me, clinging to his arm as you move away from eddie who was stood deflated at the table.

will thankfully catches your drift, steering you towards the bar, ‘you okay? i was just about to leave..’ placing his empty glass onto the bar with a soft sigh.

‘what? no.. if i can’t go then you’re not allowed either,’ talking sternly to the boy even though he now towered above you and just about everybody else in here.

he screws up his face, looking over to the dance floor, ‘it’s just..’ sighing once again, ‘awful, isn’t it?’ following his gaze to an intoxicated mike performing an elaborate air guitar routine in the middle of the floor.

it wasn’t exactly the same, but you could empathise with the difficult situation and that foul feeling in your stomach that you were sure he could feel too. you could imagine that it wasn’t easy to see the man you’d once, or perhaps still loved after so long. in fact, you didn’t really need to imagine at all.

deciding it was better to change the subject, distract him from the unraveling scene on the dance floor, ‘d’you smoke?’

he looks around quickly, watching out for a listening jonathan, you assume before he nods quickly, ‘but no one can know,’ a hint of a smile creeping onto his face.

you return the devilish grin before hooking your arm in his, pulling him towards the door where you could get the hell away from annoying men and their long black hair.

-

it’s gone three by the time you get back to steve’s, genuinely having to coax him from the party and into the cab you’d shared with a belligerent dustin, making sure he had got home safely.

‘i wasn’t too mean, was i?’ snuggled up in steve’s blankets, facing each other in the low light of his room.

‘nooo, no you were on fire,’ he laughs, he was still tipsy and slightly reeking of booze as he lay next to you.

‘really? you’re sure?’ he was definitely just drunk and blabbing on but you’d take it.

‘yes.. it was perfect,’ he hiccups, interrupting his sentence, ‘buuut.. and i’m not the only one who said this so don’t kill me..’ kissing the back of his teeth, ‘you’re not gonna like what i have to say.’

‘what? what is it?’ prodding his shoulder with a quick jab. knowing eddie, he’d probably gone round the party whispering some bullshit about the two of you.

‘well..’ holding his hands in the air, ‘there’s still chemistry there.. y’know i could see it,’ raising his eyebrows, hands collapsing onto the blanket.

‘right, i’m going to sleep.. you’re drunk and just saying stupid shit now,’ rolling your eyes as you settle into the soft pillow, closing your eyes so you no longer had to entertain his idiotic nonsense.

he chortles, hiccuping mid-laugh which makes a horrid choking noise, ‘i’m not that drunk.. robin said it too,’ the lamp clicks off, darkening the room, ‘and dustin..’

‘go to sleep steve,’ unamused and tired.

‘okay okay.. goodnight,’ he calls, you can hear the smile in his voice as he turns to face the other way, taking that as your opportunity to rest your head on his back, nuzzling into the soft cotton t-shirt.

-

monday is particularly awful and you’re reminded exactly why you don’t drink often. two days on and you’re still exhausted, half-heartedly filling the shelves and just trying to make it to two o’clock.

in your tired state, one of the bottles of shampoo you were putting out, falls out of your hand and rolls off somewhere down the aisle. you sigh, a deep, fed-up, exhaustive sigh and get up to go and fetch it when the bottle appears before your face, a tattooed, ring-filled hand latched onto it.

‘carver? really?’ eddie frowns, watching you from above, eyebrows furrowed together.

you place the bottle onto it’s rightful spot on the shelf and choose to ignore him. if he’d come all the way down here just to piss you off about your poor life choices then he could get fucked.

‘when’d that happen?’

blanking him again as you continue to put stuff onto the shelves. this was the easiest way to guarantee that you weren’t going to get yourself fired for being rude to him.

‘you gonna ignore me? i just wanna know,’ still poking and prodding, he clearly wasn’t very good at picking up on context clues.

nothing.

‘fuck, can you just talk to me for five minutes?’ your silence was driving him crazy, aggravating him to no end.

‘i’m at work, so no,’ hurriedly trying to finish the stock you had so you had an excuse to rush out the back and away from him.

he was fortunate that it was a quiet monday, the store full of mostly older ladies who had no idea who he was. you sorta hoped that he’d get mobbed and would have to hurry off and leave you alone.

‘why jason? out of literally everyone else in this shithole you choose jason?’ screwing his face up in disgust.

you slam the box cutter down with a loud clatter, causing a few turned heads and raised eyebrows. fuck ‘em. if you had done what you’d really wanted to do, you’d be locked up forever.

‘i don’t know if you remember this but my boyfriend of like, two years ran away and never came home so yeah.. that kinda fucked with me a little and lucky for me, jason carver was there and also hated my ex’s guts.. so it was perfect, you know?’ staring flatly at him, you were not dealing with his shit today.

eddie scoffs, ‘so you had a kid with him? and now.. what? you play happy families just to spite me? is that it?’

‘yes eddie, i had a whole child just to piss you off.’

he gawps back at you, clearly also did not possess the ability to sense sarcasm.

‘no,’ scowling at him, ‘it was an accident and now he’s.. i dunno, coaching basketball at some school in ohio or some shit.. why don’t you go and bother him?’

‘so you’re not together?’

you can only roll your eyes in response, in sheer disbelief that he’d made such a fuss because he couldn’t just outright ask if you were single.

un-fucking-believable.

you’ve had just about enough of this conversation, pulling your little trolley back towards the swing doors that lead to the warehouse. at least he wasn’t allowed in there.

‘wait! wait..’ he grabs onto the other side of the trolley, stopping you from walking off, ‘have dinner with me tonight or.. tomorrow?’ eyes big and pleading.

‘now why would i do that?’

‘because i want to explain myself.. i need to.’

one of the younger shoppers notices who he is and begins trying to talk to him, coming over to where you two stood rather excitedly. eddie is kind enough to smile and give her a few polite words, eyes still latched onto yours despite the ecstatic woman beside him.

‘okay,’ honestly just wanting to get away from all this commotion, ‘tomorrow.’

his scowl subsides, replaced by a gleaming grin, ‘six o’clock.. pino’s, i’ll sort it, okay?’ already starting to walk away from the crazy woman.

‘right,’ you nod, pulling your trolley away and into the back warehouse, leaning against the concrete wall. the whole exchange was tiring, knocking whatever tiny bit of energy out of you.

were you actually gonna go?

absolutely fucking not.

-

by the time six rolls around the next night, you really had forgotten all about it. rushing to get ella her dinner after swimming lessons, already worrying about paying for yet another field trip she’d sprung on you earlier. you’d begun to wonder if they even taught in the classrooms anymore with the amount of permission slips she brought home.

she’s finally settled into bed, after much protesting and a lot of coaxing. you’re just about to finally relax on the couch when someone hammers on your front door. and if you weren’t already pissed off with ella’s whining, you were most definitely about to be with whichever mindless prick was banging on your door.

‘what do you want?’ you hiss, jerking the door open to reveal a pathetic looking eddie on the other side, face forlorn and dejected.

he’s in that white shirt again. it makes you sick to your stomach to admit that it really does look good on him. his arms now more defined, the cotton sticking to his muscles, briefly showcasing the new tattoos underneath. maybe he’d actually got off of his ass and did something other than smoke weed all day.

‘oh so you are alive, d’you forget about something?’ he’s snarling now, having conjured up some elaborate excuse in his head as to why you hadn’t showed, only to find you at home, seemingly with no care in the world.

‘oops,’ the corners of your mouth twitching into a smile, you hadn’t even actually meant to stand him up, you were just gonna call his hotel and cancel but the thought had just completely slipped your mind.

and even if it shouldn’t, it really did feel good. knowing he was the one sat waiting for you for once.

‘oops? i sat there for an hour waiting for you and then spent the last hour trying to convince dustin to give me your fucking address.. and all you can say is oops?’

you shrug, ‘feels pretty shitty to be forgotten about, doesn’t it?’ tilting your head, watching as his face falls. he’d been got.

‘okay.. okay, i get it, and i’m sorry.. there’s not a day that goes by that i don’t feel like shit for how i treated you,’ his head dips low, looking particularly sorry for himself.

and for a second you do too. not that he deserved it. quickly having to remind yourself exactly what he had done to you, which was not at all helped by the fact that he now had everything he’d ever wanted in life.

and you couldn’t fault your life. truly. but fuck did it sting sometimes, to know that your life had stagnated, stuck in the same shitty town you’d grown up in while he was on the other side of the country, more money than sense and a hoard of doting fans that would do absolutely anything he’d ask of them.

‘good,’ you bark, going to slam the door shut only for it to bang against his black boot wedged in the door, ‘if you don’t move your foot i’ll- i’ll call the police.’

‘no you won’t,’ his hand reaches out to grab onto the other side of the handle, he could’ve easily pushed his way in if he’d really wanted, ‘let’s talk.. like adults,’ begging you now, ‘please.’

you huff, this would end with you either letting him in or being forced to wake ella after you bashed his head into the doorframe. it was easier to just accept the first option and you’d find some bullshit to get him to leave later on.

opening the door wider to let him in, keeping your eyes square on the ground as he walks through, peering around at your home. probably comparing it to his mansion in the hollywood hills the pretentious fuck.

‘nice..’ he nods, leaning in to look at the photo of you and ella a few christmas’ ago, she was tiny then, sporting a miniature santa hat.

‘yeah well, she’s asleep upstairs so.. make it quick,’ you frown, closing the door behind him, watching as his eyes take in the cluttered room, smile fading when he catches sight of the singular picture you have up of jason and ella.

‘i can’t believe you chose to fuck jason of all people.. i mean, i’ve made some shitty decisions in my life but..’ he stops himself from going any further when he sees your face, if looks could kill, he’d be long gone by now.

‘did you come here for a reason? or are you here to talk about my life decisions.. because i really don’t want to hear it from you,’ crossing your arms over your chest, wanting him out of your house.

‘no.. no, shit- i’m sorry,’ he shuffles on his feet, banging his head, ‘i wanna talk.. properly.’

you roll your hand to motion for him to continue, ‘go on..’

he inhales, chewing on the inside of his cheek, trying to psyche himself up to actually say what he wanted to say. it wasn’t that he didn’t know what to say, he just couldn’t string it together to make sense.

‘i’m sorry for the way i treated you.. it wasn’t right and i know that now,’ his hand coming to rub the back of his clammy next, why was your house so fucking hot?

‘okay.. apology accepted, was that everything?’ you say flatly, glancing up the stairs to make sure ella wasn’t awake and out of her room.

his face falls, ‘can you just.. just let me explain,’ his adam apple bobbing as he swallows, ‘why don’t you sit down..’ motioning towards your ratty couch.

you relent your stern stature, hesitantly going to sit on the couch, trying to ensure that he couldn’t possibly sit next to you by sprawling your legs out onto the empty cushion. so he takes the seat furthest away, running his hands down his tight jeans. designer, no less.. the only person you knew stupid enough to spend thousands on designer jeans just to tear holes in them.

‘when i ended things with you, i wasn’t.. well, it was me, but i had my manager screaming in my ear that it’d never work and he could hook me up with some fuckin’ model.. it’d help the band.. so that’s what i did,’ and for once, he looked genuinely remorseful, fiddling with the loose threads on his expensive jeans.

‘so you sold out? that’s your excuse?’

his head shoots up, mouth hung open with absolute disgust all over his face, ‘i am not a sell out.’

which is incredibly refutable, you’d heard a snippet of one of their recent songs on the radio at work and it had sounded exactly like the commercial shit he used to rag on when you were together. not a touch on the corroded coffin you sat and watched practice for hours on end.

‘oh? so you didn’t break up with me to further your career? you just wanted to fuck hot models? which one is it ‘cause i’m a little confused here,’ completely losing it, springing up from your slouched position.

‘okay, yeah.. yeah i did, i broke up with you because i wanted to fuckin’ make something of my life.. and look at where i am and look at-,’

‘-don’t you dare finish that sentence,’ you snap, gritting your teeth together as you near his face, positively shaking with rage.

‘what’re you gonna do? you gonna hit me? do it,’ his chin tilted to match your elevated position, eyes glued to yours.

‘i should.’

his lips twitch into a smirk, ‘you won’t.’

and before your brain has the time to really process your next movements, he balls his fist into your t-shirt, causing your chest to collide into his as his lips smash into yours, knocking the air out of your lungs.

scrambling to find his shoulders for balance, sliding one hand onto his stubbly cheek. it’s all teeth and tongues, he’s ravenous and unrelenting, letting go of his grip on your shirt to place his hands on your hips, ‘move,’ mumbling against your lips as he attempts to manoeuvre you onto his lap while twisting around.

he slides down the couch, keeping a solid hold of your body as you find the right position. your legs are either side of his waist, sliding into the gap between his body and the couch sitting right on his crotch. wasting absolutely zero time in connecting your lips against, honestly not wanting to run the risk of him opening his mouth and ruining this.

his large hands find solace on your ass, creeping up to remove the oversized shirt you’d thrown on. you place your hand above his, restricting him from moving any further. it’s not that you were embarrassed- okay, maybe you were a little. but your body had changed since becoming a mom and eddie had become accustomed to gorgeous models and perfect women that he’d certainly not want to see your boring, frumpy mom body.

he groans in protest, trying again to lift the shirt further only for your fingernails to dig into his hand, ‘no,’ speaking into the filthy kiss.

eddie pulls away from the kiss, fingers coming to gently brush the hair from your face, ‘you can’t be serious? i’ve seen it all before,’ he grumbles, fingers itching to try lift it again.

‘not like this you haven’t.. i just.. want it on, okay?’

‘no- why won’t you let me take this off?’ fingers curling around the hem, already trying his luck with getting it up again.

you sigh, meeting his blown out eyes with your glossy ones, ‘i don’t even know what i’m doing.. fuck,’ attempting to climb off of his lap while the spare hand he has on your ass clamps you down, keeping you pressed to him.

‘hey.. hey, keep it on.. i don’t care,’ already trying to chase your lips, ‘i’m just saying, you don’t need to,’ the denim covering his growing erection starting to rub against your throbbing clit, the sparse material of your pajama shorts were not leaving much to the imagination.

‘jesus christ, just take it off,’ giving up in your protest, it was useless against eddie’s persistence.

you press your lips to his the second your shirt is off, there was no time to judge your body if he couldn’t see it. pulling at his jacket to get it off, the metal buttons digging into your now bare skin.

‘i didn’t.. i didn’t mean.. what i said..’ babbling through the kiss as he shimmies out of the jacket, landing on the floor with a soft thud.

‘shut up,’ you whine, running your hand along the length of his chest until you reach the hem of his black shirt, gripping your fingers around the fabric and lifting it slightly, exposing his midriff, the soft trail of hair ascending the skin.

his head jerks backwards, allowing you to tug the shirt off, finally allowing his eyes to wander to your chest. ‘holy shit,’ he remarks like he’d never seen a pair of tits before. it’s futile for him to pretend that he hadn’t seen some amazing boobs in his time so you scoff, rolling your eyes.

working your hand at his belt buckle, fiddling with the metal until it pops undone. he’s hard already and it makes you groan, brushing your hand over the raised denim. this week seriously must’ve been difficult if he was getting hard so easily over you.

it doesn’t ever occur to you how much of a mistake this was. and even if it did, you didn’t have much time to ponder on it as his hands are grabbing at your breasts, palming them as his lips suck at your jaw and down onto your neck softly. guaranteed to leave a lovely violet mark that the old ladies at work would certainly gasp at.

he’s helping you with his jeans, one hand gripping onto your waist to keep you steady as he lifts his hips from the couch and the other hurriedly yanking them down just enough to reveal his boxers. that’s the next port of call, fingers grabbing at the thin black cotton, pulling them down his thighs as his cock springs into action.

eddie’s lips are still on your neck while you mindlessly wrap your hand around his cock, pumping your fist as you shuffle upwards. his breath hitches in his throat, still peppering sloppy kisses to the sensitive skin.

‘oh god,’ he whines into your collarbone, feeling his eyelashes flutter against your jaw. for a man who had been painted as womaniser in the media, he sure was still just as pathetic as he used to be underneath you.

you’re a little annoyed that it’s you who’s taking control right now. after so many years of disrespect from his end, you think he at least owed it to you to take charge.

your hand grabs onto his shoulder, pulling his face from your neck, ‘be quiet, okay?’ sitting taller to position yourself comfortably, the harsh fabric of the couch grazing your knees.

he nods, sliding his hand up your waist and back to your hip, taking in the sight of you. you wouldn’t ever admit it aloud, but truthfully, you really did miss him sometimes. missed the way his pretty pink lips looked after being glued to yours or the way he gazed at you doing the most mundane tasks.

you cant your hips, sinking down onto his length slowly, biting down onto your bottom lip as his cock fills you to the hilt. his eyelids flicker, fingernails digging into your doughy hips. it’s been a little while since you’d done this so you have to take a second to become accustomed to the slight stretch. it’s good, in the most masochistic way.

your hands cling onto his shoulders, watching his slack jaw, tiny breaths escaping from his mouth as you attempt to move. painstakingly slow at first, knees beginning to shake as you try to remember what you should even be doing. your cheeks flushing, feeling so incredibly embarrassed. the man was fucking models and then you’re here, pitifully trying to ride him. it’s awful, you know it’s awful.

his arm comes to snake around your waist, taking matters into his own hands and flipping the two of you around, your back suddenly pressed into the couch. holy shit. you appreciate the initiative, wrapping your legs around his waist, readjusting your grip on his shoulders.

‘need you a little faster than that darling,’ large hands digging into the couch either side of your head. you’d feel utterly mortified if you weren’t thoroughly enjoying the sight of him looming over you, his hair falling beautifully into your face.

eddie starts slow at first, moving his hips slowly, obviously well versed. your mouth opens but no noise escapes, well aware that you weren’t the only ones in your house. instead you pant softly, desperate for his lips to grace yours again.

it’s not long before he’s quickening his pace, unable to contain himself when you feel so perfect around him. ‘i missed you- fuck, i’ve missed you so much,’ he groans, keeping his voice low despite wanting to start screaming.

you don’t reply, too fucked-out to even think about words. eyes drooping as his cock nudges against the soft spongy spot no one other than him had been able to reach.

the couch creaks beneath you, the old thing unable to keep up with his rutting hips, the top of your head knocking into the arm rest every time his hips collided with yours. your living room had never bore witness to such filth and as quiet as you were trying to be, the sounds are indistinguishable.

having to bite down onto your lip when his thumb meets your clit, legs tightening around his waist with every soft circle he draws around the sensitive bud. eddie was never bad in bed but holy shit, maybe money had done something right for him.

he sits up, soft sighs falling out of his lips as his hand disconnects from your clit, sliding toward your knee and positioning your leg onto his shoulder. your nails press into his forearm, willing yourself to stay quiet even now he’s seemingly trying to kill you.

and through it all, he’s smirking. relishing the way you’re writhing around, trying not to cum when he nudges against that sweet, spongy spot this position allowed.

his thumb finds your clit again, ‘holy shit sweetheart.. you gonna cum?’ grunting softly with every thrust.

you’re positively wrecked beneath him, face pressed into the couch cushion as your stomach flips. panting into the fabric, incoherent ramblings of eddie’s name and a bunch of curse words fill the room.

‘cum for me baby.. shit,’ struggling to keep his own pace as you tighten around him, leg trembling around his neck as your orgasm takes over. pleasure overtaking your limbs as your hips buck instinctively, thankfully muffled by the couch.

‘oh my god,’ you breathe, struggling to see straight when your eyes eventually reopen, gazing up at eddie above, certain he’s about to draw blood from his teeth digging in to his lip.

‘where.. where shall i- shit,’ he squeezes out, feeling his hips begin to stutter, eyes rolling to the back of his head. he’s just about quick enough to pull out, thick ropes of cum paint your thighs. narrowly avoiding the couch.

if you had the energy to get annoyed, you would’ve snapped, but in all honesty, your brain was still reeling and anger was the last thing you felt.

eddie reaches over, ever the gentleman and grabs his shirt to clean his mess. didn’t matter to him obviously, he had more than enough money to buy another.

and there it is. the bitterness filling your body again the second he’s no longer on top of you, or inside of you rather. you attempt to bite it down.

‘you wanna talk now?’ he asks, pulling his boxers back up to a more respectable position.

‘i’m tired eddie,’ and you are, on a school night like tonight you’d have been fast asleep by now.

he sighs, shoulders slumping over. even after you’d just had the most mind-altering sex, you couldn’t speak to him. ‘please,’ pleading with you almost, desperate for one more chance.

maybe it’s the exhaustion or maybe the dopamine still pumping through your brain but you concede, pulling your shirt back over your head before motioning for him to speak.

‘i don’t have any excuses, i’m just-,’ he sighs, turning on the couch to face you fully, ‘i’m sorry for hurting you, i was wrong and i know that,’ his eyes are dipped, peering at you from underneath his spindly lashes, ‘why d’you think i’ve avoided this place for so long?’

‘i don’t know? because you’re a pussy? because you’re too scared to face me?’ letting the words rattle off your tongue without much thought.

‘because i’m embarrassed,’ he corrects, without much offence, ‘because i’m ashamed and feel like i owe you more than some dick and a shitty apology.. i just didn’t know how i could ever make it up to you,’ half-moon eyes glossy in the low light.

your heart thumps in your chest, blood echoing through your ears. eddie munson, world renowned rockstar was sat on your couch, apologising for something you should’ve forgotten about a long time ago.

the years of hatred and avoidance come tumbling down in a millisecond. all you’d ever wanted was to hear him say sorry. to admit that he’d fucked you over for a life of fame and now you had it, you weren’t exactly sure what to even do with it.

‘okay.. now what? are you gonna make it up to me? because i want to believe you eddie, i do.. but you can’t just traipse in here and expect me to forgive you like that,’ the tears roll over, sliding down your warm cheeks.

he nods, grabbing onto your hands in a last ditch gesture to show his sincerity, ‘i’m going to.. i-i want to,’ he’s still nodding, bringing his face closer to yours, ‘tell me how, i’ll do anything,’ adam’s apple bobbing with every word.

‘stay here,’ your eyes are trained on him, ignoring the blurred vision, ‘not forever, just for now,’ lips pursed, ready to be broken once more.

you half-expect him to come out with some sorry excuse, tell you he had to get back to his hotel so he couldn’t possible stay here.

but he doesn’t.

eddie takes your hand, tugging it gently and with words you don’t register, babbles something about bed. so you follow him, allowing him to guide you to your room and slide in between the sheets next to you.

everything is so gentle, soft and pure. something you hadn’t felt in a long time.

-

‘hey.. sweetheart,’ eddie’s hand gently shakes your arm, whispering into your ear, ‘you awake?’

you squint in the dim light, feeling his hand descend onto your waist, chest pressed against your back, ‘i am now,’ you grumble, it was early.. early even by ella’s standards.

‘i gotta go.. you got work today?’ he asks, making no effort to actually get up and leave your bed though.

you nod into the pillow, rubbing your sleep heavy eyes. in your sleep hazed state, you shuffle, moving backwards against him.

‘okay.. shit- don’t do that,’ strained as you shift against him, unknowingly brushing against his cock, ‘i’ll be back.. after you..’ he’s losing it a little now, ‘after you finish..’ lips pressed to your ear.

you were moving deliberately now, just ever-so-slightly rocking your hips back and forth, you could feel him growing against your ass.

‘i can’t..’ he groans, grip tightening on your hip,

‘please,’ you breathe, reaching backwards to find his mop of curls, taking a fistful for leverage as his own hip’s thrust into your backside, his low growls only spurring you on.

you had been on your own for so long now, could he really blame you?

eddie doesn’t leave for another hour, creeping out of your house with his head low and a shit eating grin plastered on his face.

-

the key turns in your door as you’re loading the dishwasher. you’d given steve a spare for emergencies but it seemed to get used for anything but.

he slinks into the kitchen where you stand with your back to him, ‘hey,’ already knowing who it was.

‘well hello,’ announcing his presence, something about his tone of voice already seemed off, he sounded short, annoyed almost, ‘how have you been?’

‘i’m good..’ you spin to face him, puzzled by his strange demeanour, ‘how are you?’

he’s holding onto something behind his back but you can’t quite catch a glimpse, ‘actually.. i’m a little pissed off,’ you can tell he’s not completely serious by the hint of a smile on his face.

‘hmm? why’s that?’

he looks around the room expectedly, ‘oh i don’t know.. you don’t have anything to tell me, do you?’ shaking his head, still gripping onto this mystery object.

‘no..’ narrowing your eyes, determining whether he knew what you thought he knew.

he did, he one hundred percent did. holy fuck. he’d figured you out already. eddie had opened his big, stupid mouth and told dustin, who would’ve told steve and god knows who else. fucking moron.

‘no? soo..’ his pulls the magazine from behind his back, flipping it to the page he’d already saved, ‘this isn’t real then?’ shoving the glossy pages into your face, ‘because to me.. this looks an awful lot like eddie.. at this very house,’ he jabs his finger at the pixelated image, ‘and this little blob here.. that’s you, no?’

you’re utterly gobsmacked. mouth hung open in pure shock. because that most definitely was eddie.. and your house.. and you. you hadn’t seen anyone with a camera, hell, you hadn’t seen anyone on the street at all.

‘and correct me if i’m wrong, but is this not our friend eddie leaving your house the next morning?’ showing the next image of him leaving your house the day after, hair unruly and messed up, holding his denim jacket in his arms as he climbs into his car.

your mouth moves but no words come out, croaking as you struggle to meet steve’s eyes. completely speechless, there was no feasible excuse. you had been caught with your pants down. literally.

‘i can explain,’ waving your hands around while steve stands smug against the kitchen counter. ‘..no i can’t,’ shoulders slumped as you blink at your best friend, no you really couldn’t. suppose you could’ve come up with some lie about a look-a-like you’d been seeing but that would’ve made you look particularly strange.

‘were you ever gonna tell me?’ he’s almost hurt that you hadn’t ran to him to tell him immediately. this was true best friend gossip and you’d kept him from it.

‘i was! steve.. i don’t even know what happened- he came over to apologise and then we were arguing and then.. then we had sex and it’s not my fault..’ you’re trying, and failing, to contain your smile, flashing your cheeky grin to your best friend in the hopes he would let this slide.

‘i can’t believe you didn’t tell me!’ jutting his bottom lip out, ‘so, you’re getting back together?’ his eyes sceptical yet sparkling with a sense of hope. you’re grateful that all he seems to care about is the fact you lied. or actually, withheld the truth as you preferred it.

‘no.. well.. no, we had dinner together yesterday and he might’ve stayed over but no..’ shaking your head, ‘he’s leaving again soon and we both know what happened last time..’ you shrug, leaning back against the counter, ‘i guess i don’t hate him now, that’s good isn’t it?’

steve looks perplexed, ‘wait wait wait.. so you’re just.. screwing around? and then he leaves again, that’s it? what’s the point?’ taking a seat at the small kitchen table, fully engrossed in the conversation.

‘i dunno.. i guess that’s it?’ you hadn’t really thought about the fact that he’d be leaving again, in fact, you hadn’t really had time to think much at all about what was happening.

you’d just sort of acknowledged that at some point he’d go back to california and you’d stay here and whatever was happening would.. end? it wasn’t as if you were going to be super upset about it like you once were. lots of people fuck their ex’s.. this was fine.

because that’s what this is, right?

just sex with an ex?

‘that’s it?’ steve reiterates, looking completely flabbergasted that the woman who once left the room whenever eddie munson’s name was mentioned was now being so casual about this.

‘yeah,’ you shrug, not wanting to make a massive deal out of it though you could always rely on steve to be over dramatic on your behalf.

‘no,’ he straightens up in the chair, ‘all of this can’t be for nothing,’ sounding utterly exasperated, ‘you two obviously belong together so why don’t you go for it? i could see you living it up out in la.. big house, big car-,’

you cut him off before he can divulge into his delusions any further, ‘i think you’re getting ahead of yourself steve,’ shaking your head at his ludicrous attitude.

you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about it once or twice but it seemed silly to start imagining this crazy life together after all these years. he’d barely just made it into your good graces again, you were hardly going to run off to california with him. it was utter delusion.

‘okay okay..’ he scoffs, ‘but i still think you need to talk to him. i don’t want you getting hurt again, okay? just make sure that you’re both on the same page,’ nodding as he stands from his seat and begins to rummage through your cupboards for something to eat.

he was probably right and you knew it deep down. you weren’t keen on being the one to bring the conversation up, not after that first night. after you had sobbed in his arms in bed, letting him soothe you to sleep with a bunch of probable empty promises.

-

when eddie lets himself into your house a few hours later, steve’s eyebrows fly up his forehead but he doesn’t say a word. instead, he nods at the man, keeping his opinions to himself.

the pair of you resemble an old married couple, except you’re the grumpy old man with your wife cuddled into your side. your wife being steve that is.

‘oh.. is this uh, something that happens often?’ eddie asks, settling into the empty chair across from you. slightly miffed that steve was nestled into your side.

‘yup,’ you nod, smiling at him your chin resting on steve’s head. he hadn’t a reason to be jealous, you’d really rather poke your eyeballs out with a fork than do anything remotely sexual with steve.

‘right.. yeah okay,’ eddie says, looking perplexed but sitting back in the chair. if he was going to stick around then this would have to be something that he got used to. because you sure as hell weren’t going to stop being so close with steve for the guy that broke your heart at eighteen.

‘you want a drink?’ you ask, realising that you should probably be a good host even if it was only eddie.

‘yeah sure.’

you untangle yourself from steve and trundle off into the kitchen. steve takes this as the perfect opportunity to grill eddie on his intentions, sitting up straight and making sure that you were really gone before beginning his interrogation.

‘so.. you two?’

eddie shrugs, not wanting to get into it with steve after such a long day.

steve sighs, leaning toward eddie, ‘i’m gonna say this once.. but if you hurt her again, i will kill you,’ staring the other man down. contempt in his eyes. he was dead serious too.

‘i’m not- i’m not gonna hurt her,’ eddie sits up, praying that you’d hurry back with this damn drink.

‘i mean it eddie,’ raising his eyebrows, ‘you didn’t see how she was after you left.. i’m not going through that again, i’m not letting her go through that again.’

‘steve-,’ eddie blinks, stopping himself as you re-enter the room. hoping that you hadn’t heard their conversation, he’d only just got you to stop hating him. he wasn’t prepared to go back to that like, ever.

‘what’re you talking about?’ placing the bottle of beer in front of eddie and collapsing back into your spot on the couch.

‘football,’ steve answers quickly, groaning as he pushes himself off of the sofa, ‘i’m gonna head home, got work in the morning but i’ll see you tomorrow,’ he smiles, winking at you from above.

‘okay,’ you utter, sounding more like a question than a statement, watching carefully as he gathers his things without so much as a glance at eddie. you can only imagine what was actually said but that was truly none of your business.

you’d just grill eddie later to make sure steve hasn’t been too much of an asshole.

‘byee,’ you call out behind him, already eyeing a sheepish eddie. this’d probably be it. you’d known it was coming at some point, you just weren’t sure of when.

if steve’s sudden departure was anything to go off, you were probably right.

the door clicks shut and you turn your attention to eddie who was still sat on the solemn chair. oh god. maybe you had got a little used to having him around again and now to know that it’d all be coming to an abrupt end once again.. yeah you felt a tad shit.

‘what’d you say?’ you ask outright, it made zero sense to beat around the bush.

‘me?’ he looks almost offended, ‘i didn’t say shit.. didn’t get the chance to,’ but he’s smiling ever so slightly and your heart relaxes.

christ you were so stupid. letting him back into your life just to let him walk away a second time. perhaps you’d done something horrific in a past life to deserve this same fate twice.

‘so what did he say?’ you press, unsure of if your even wanted the answer.

eddie sighs before coming to collapse on the couch next to you, ‘it wasn’t important.. look, i wanna be honest with you,’ his hand comes to grab yours and you freeze, bracing yourself for what was inevitably going to come next. ‘you mean a lot to me and.. and i don’t want you to think that i don’t care or that i’m just leaving you again,’ his eyes are focussed on yours, full of what you hope is sincerity.

you don’t reply, instead you nod slightly and urge him to continue. this was it. the kicker. 

‘i’ve gotta go back to la next week,’ his grip tightens around your hand, ‘but i’m coming back as soon as i can, okay?’ he’s serious too and you’d like to believe him but if the past was anything to go by, you weren’t eager.

you nod silently. fuck this. once again, you were sat before eddie munson, listening to his plans to jet off to la. it felt like the cruelest case of deja-vu. if anything, you want to kick yourself for even allowing him to wiggle his way back into your heart. most people know better after the first time.

‘it’s three weeks.. maybe a month, but i’m coming back, i promise,’ he pleads, hanging his head low. he knows there’s absolutely nothing he could say to you that would make you believe him but he had to try.

you hum, frowning just a little before finally replying, ‘i’ve heard that before,’ not meaning to sound as snarky as you did, but it was true.

‘i’m serious, i’m not.. not gonna lose you again, i’ve learnt my lesson,’ his eyes are big and pleading and you’re thrown right back to being eighteen, listening to him convince you how going to la would be the best decision.

‘so.. what? you’re gonna come back to hawkins just to see me? i don’t-,’ you sigh, as much as you wanted to believe him, it just wasn’t plausible in your mind, ‘i just don’t understand, are we together or are you just coming back to fuck? you don’t have to, you know? i’ve made peace with it all and i’m fine.. you don’t have to lie to me anymore.’

if anyone was going to fuck this up, it would be you. that’s for certain.

‘what the fuck?’ he exclaims, genuinely flabbergasted, ‘this is me telling you that i’m serious about this.. about you,’ he takes your hand into his properly, scooting around to face you fully, ‘i love being here with you, and ella and there is nothing out in la worth more than this,’ you think he might just start crying, or you might. or perhaps both of you.

you sniff, not wanting to speak in fear of bursting into hysterics. it was all just so confusing and weird. you’d grown accustomed to eddie being on the other side of the country and now suddenly he was back in your life with what seemed like a a declaration of love. it was just too much to handle. and maybe you blame yourself a little, for not truly thinking about the implications of fucking your ex that had abandoned you years prior. but now it all just seemed to be hurtling in the most intense direction.

you were the one that had told him to stay after all. because really, you could’ve kicked him out, refused to ever even acknowledge him again. but you hadn’t.

‘are you telling me the truth?’ is all that you manage to squeak out. baring resemblance to a small child.

you really must’ve looked pathetic, eyes brimming with tears, bottom lip quivering as you hold in the implosion of emotions. it’s always scary being vulnerable with someone, let alone someone that once meant so much to you.

he still did. as much as you’re absolutely petrified to admit it, he’d weaselled his way back into your heart and now here you are, a mess of emotions and perplexing feelings that are too complicated to handle.

‘i promise you,’ he sighs, clearly fed up of your whining, ‘i’m coming back this time.’

and maybe you’re stupid. maybe you’re still hung up on some high school relationship that ended long ago but you can’t help it, you nod.

idiotically believing him because what else can you do after letting him into your home and your heart again.

#eddie munson #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x female reader

[visionofhope04]

Here for the angst of neglected batsis, imagine or hc them of moving out if the house when they are 18 and let's say they meet some spirit and they have their memory wiped and transfer to the marvel universe to restart their life and more happy, then the dc/marvel merge together because of a big threat and batfam sees batsis is heavily pregnant and married to our favorite deadpool charater Colossus?

How would they reached if batsis just can't remember them and keeps on telling them they have the wrong person?

I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK. Guess who's back!! Sorry it took me so long to get this out, I haven't had the motivation to write until recently. Also OOC warning bc I don't really know him well besides the Deadpool movies. I almost freaked out bc I haven't used the tumblr website in so long and it got updated so I thought I lost all my drafts. So glad they're still here, whew. Not beta read so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes!

---

It's been a year since moving into your apartment and you couldn't be happier. College was going well and you were taking classes you enjoyed. However, you haven't made any friends yet which led you to spend your free time reading or surfing the web. Jason didn't come by much due to having his own life and vigilante things, which you understood. It didn't mean you couldn't be a little bit sad about it though.

Even though you were enjoying your life, you still felt as if there was something missing. You'd been trying to figure out why you had felt this way but nothing came to mind. Any time you tried to brush off the feeling, it came back stronger. You did your best to ignore it and continue on with life, but it was always there, nagging you.

It had been a long day. College was so stressful. Your professors kept hurling projects at you that had deadlines that were practically impossible to meet. You just wanted it to end already and be on summer break. Then, you’d be able to sleep how long you wanted to without the fear of being late for class or forgetting to complete an assignment.

You sat down at your desk and pulled out your laptop, preparing to continue an essay that was due in three days. Suddenly, you began to feel nauseous. Confused, you attempted to ignore the feeling in favor of completing the essay. A few seconds after trying to focus on your laptop screen, you saw a bright light.

"My child, you will be saved from this life." A strangely comforting voice said.

Then everything faded to black.

---

"Hello?!"

A voice. A voice? But you live alone and no one has the spare key to your apartment. You slowly opened your eyes, groaning and quickly shutting them again once a bright light blinded you.

"Oh you're alive, thank God. Can you speak?" Whoever this was seemed to have been panicking before, slightly less though now that you had indicated you were alive. You groan as you push yourself up off of what seems to be concrete. Concrete? You're definitely not in your apartment. You crack your eyes open again, this time with less difficulty, and come face to face with white lenses of a mask. Blinking again, you register that the lenses are attached to a red material with black lines.

"Ah!"

"AH!" The figure yells and jumps back, startled by your sudden surprise.

"What the hell are you supposed to be?" You asked, tilting your head slightly to the side.

"What do you mean? I'm Spiderman." His voice was a bit high pitched, he sounded like a teen at most.

"Spiderman? You've got to be joking. There is no Spiderman. Go home kid, crime fighting isn't a game." Sure, you may be a hypocrite, seeing as you are an ex-assassin who began learning how to kill at around 5, but at least you had training. What did this Spiderman have? From how startled he was, you assumed he had barely been trained, if at all.

“What? I'm literally Spiderman! I'm Queens' hero!"

"Queens, New York?" You thought you'd still be in New Jersey at least.

"Uh yeah. I don't think there are any other places called Queens that have a Spiderman."

"Again, Spiderman? Seriously? You couldn't think of a better name at least?"

"Hey! There's nothing wrong with Spiderman!"

"Sure kid, keep telling yourself that."

He was about to protest when suddenly, someone else dropped into the alley.

"Hey Spidey, who's this lovely lady?" A person in an all red with black suit with two swords on his back and guns strapped to his waist called out. The person seemed to be a male, around 30 years old.

"This 'lovely lady' is very confused. Who are you?" They keep multiplying, and you'd never seen this person either.

"Did you hit your head or something? You've never heard of or seen Deadpool? The most handsomest, most awesomest, funniest, killer crime fighter?"

"Uh nope. Also, I'm from Jersey, how did I end up here?"

"Good question. What's your name?"

"Oh, it's-" You stopped in confusion. "I actually don't remember. It was just at the tip of my tongue but I don't remember."

"Oh great! Amnesia! Just what we need. I'll let you handle her Spidey and I'll go stop some bad guys, 'kay?"

"What! No, don't leave me here!" Deadpool was already sprinting away.

"Let's get you to the base. Colossus and the others will know what to do."

---

They did not, in fact, know what to do. Colossus sent Negasonic and Yukio to contact Professor X, while Spiderman went to contact Tony Stark (I'm still emotionally scarred from Endgame so no, he won't be dead, this is my fanfic and I can keep him alive if I want to) and Deadpool went back out to patrol. You were left alone with Colossus.

Uncomfortable silence sat between you. Just as you were beginning to get antsy, Colossus broke it first.

"Do you remember anything at all?"

"I'm... a college student. I live alone in an apartment in New Jersey, I think. I used to fight crime until... I don't know, it's fuzzy. I'm an ex-assassin who has been training since I was 5. That's all I remember."

"You can remember that but not your name?"

"Look, I don't know okay? I don't know what's happening or why I can't remember anything else. I want to remember who I am, but I can't. And it's so... so frustrating! Your suspicion is understandable, but it is not helping."

"I apologize. This is a stressful situation for you. I will be more considerate."

"Thank you."

---

They could not figure out what happened to you or why you suddenly appeared in Queens one day. Your memory remained fuzzy, so you were stuck. As time passed, you and Colossus grew closer. You became so close that he told you his real name, you became a couple, and you got married. Seven years passed, you were 25 and you'd been trying for a baby. You both felt the time was right and that you'd be able to handle parenting.

Colossus came home from work one day, spent and tired. There you were, waiting for him at the door as usual.

"Hi my love, long day?" You fiddled with the positive pregnancy test behind your back.

"Yes darling, when is it not?"

"Well, we're going to have to figure something out, because there's no way I'll wake up every night to take care of our baby."

He looked confused, then realization hit. "You're..?" He looked so happy and hopeful, you couldn't contain your happiness. A huge smile lit up your face.

"Yes, we're finally going to be parents!" You pulled out the pregnancy test and held it up to him.

He laughed a joyful laugh, tears began to fall from the corners of his eyes as he embraced you. It must've been infectious because you began to tear up too. You remained in each other's embrace for a while, just existing in the moment. Time felt irrelevant as you basked in your shared delight.

---

8 months later, your belly had swollen and grown. Everyone was happy for the both of you. You and Colossus were both eager for your little one to arrive. You'd both decided to wait for birth to find out the gender. It didn't matter to you whether it was a boy or girl, just that they were healthy (gender's a construct anyway). The pregnancy had been going great so far, but this time of easy-going was about to get ruined by your husband's job.

---

Your world had merged with another because of some cosmic threat. Great! Your husband would be preoccupied trying to fix the situation, which meant that you'd be alone. Selfishly, you wished that they could let your husband stay with you so close to your due date, but you knew he had a role to play in saving two worlds.

Seeing your loneliness, Colossus decided to bring you with him to the Avengers' base. He hoped you'd be able to befriend some of the people there. You entered the compound and your eyes were drawn to some men standing beside a set of double doors. They all had suits on, black hair (one guy had two white streaks in his hair) and most had blue eyes, except for one man who had green eyes. He was also noticeably the darkest of the group. They felt familiar to you, especially the man with green eyes. Have you met them before? Who were they?

As your husband was discussing some details about the meeting, you couldn't help but watch the group of men. Not knowing why you thought you knew them annoyed you. As if they could feel your eyes on them (they could), they turned around in sync and locked eyes with you.

Their eyes widened and they all exclaimed your name in various degrees of disbelief. They rushed over to you and your husband protectively stepped in front of you

"How do you know my wife?"

"Wife?!" Some of them shouted. They were beginning to cause a scene.

"You're pregnant." The one with green eyes observed. He seemed to be having some sort of crisis.

All their eyes darted to your belly, making you uncomfortable. You placed your hand over your stomach and attempted to discretely hide behind your husband. This did not go unnoticed by them.

"You don't remember us?" The shortest of them questioned.

"No, I've never met you guys." You were very confused.

The man who appeared to be the oldest said your name. You stared at him as he studied your eyes, presumably to see if you were lying. It made you feel vulnerable and unsettled, couldn't they leave you alone?

"We're your family."

The guy with the white streaks in his hair scoffed. "You didn't treat her like she was family. I was the only one who cared for her when she was younger while you all ignored her and let her suffer. I'm glad she doesn't remember what you all did to her. She's clearly living a much better life without you lot in it."

This was getting more confusing by the second, although you felt there was truth to his words. Did you forget these people? They seemed very convincing if they were lying.

"I'm sorry but I really don't remember you guys. Maybe you have the wrong person?"

"No we don't! You disappeared one day and now that we've finally found you, you're saying you forgot everything!"

"That is enough. Please leave my wife alone, she does not know you, and she does not need the unnecessary stress of trying to remember people she's never met. Do not approach her anymore." Colossus guided you away from the men, who stared longingly at you. The heartbroken expressions they had after your husband's speech would follow you often. Were you sure you'd never met them before?

---

Words: 1,847

#batfamily #batfam #batfam x reader #dick grayson #bruce wayne #jason todd #avengers x platonic reader #colossus #colossus x reader #tim drake #damian wayne #batfam x neglected!batsis!reader

[mikwaa]

I'll always miss you, you will shine like gold in my memory.

Zhongli x Reader

Wc: 2.7k

Warnings: Angst, hurt no comfort, reader dies. Toxic relationship, Morax is an idiot brute, this is set in the Archon war, reader is a warrior.

A/n: I had this draft written here a while ago, decided to post it because it's one I really like. As the old Morax is described as a more rough and ruthless person, I imagine that for him to change there had to be a major event. And so I ended up writing this, maybe I'll do another ending because I genuinely don't like sad endings, but it went together so well I decided to leave it like this.

"Morax, please listen to me." And there you were, in one of those endless fights with your husband.

The reason this time was that you had found a group of people, begging for a place to stay, since they were wandering around. This group had been exiled from Sumeru, the reasons were not yet clear, nor did they know why. There were children, elders, even young pregnant women, you couldn't just ignore them and let them die.

And you had offered them a home in the Guili Plains, the place where the Liyue population was housed. But Morax did not accept, nor did he seem to want to change his mind.

"I've said what I think, and I'm not going to change it." And he didn't even look at you, on the contrary, he walked even faster to distance more from you.

"Can you stop being so irreverent?" You quicken your steps and stand in front of him, stopping him from moving forward.

He narrowed his eyes in your direction, his face turning into an angry frown, "I told you, don't make me repeat myself. If you choose to save those people, you can forget about coming back. I don't want you around." His words were sharp as blades, wounding as such.

And seeing his face without a drop of expression, without a single regret. How could he say such impactful things as if they were nothing?

"How can you talk like that? I'm your spouse, I'm just trying to help." You could already feel tears forming in your eyes, he always acted like a brute, but there were times you couldn't even handle it.

"You can help me by protecting my people, not by harboring strangers." The coldness with which he spoke to you was abysmal, it didn't even seem like you had any kind of relationship.

"They are people too, they have feelings too. They are afraid to die, they are simply out in the open."

"I care what's mine, we're in a war, we can't save everyone. And I chose to take care of what is mine, my territory together with my people". He states, with that usual stoic face. With that arrogance and selfishness that would drive anyone crazy with rage.

"So that's still a no?" Breathing heavily you ask him one last time, the hope you had of him giving in had simply vanished.

"It was always a no. If you're going to keep talking about it, you can save both your time and mine." Snide and sharp, he never seemed to change.

"Then you won't want me here anymore, I suppose." To his surprise, you wouldn't give up. You would keep your word no matter what.

"Go ahead." Nothing more, not a sentimentality, nothing. Just treating you like you were just another one of his pawns, like you were just another one in the crowd.

A hot tear ran down your face, your heart burning as if it had been recently scalded.

"Are you really going to treat me like this? Like I'm nothing to you, and this ring means nothing?" You removed the ring, holding it with trembling hands.

The engagement ring, which he had made for you himself, was so beautiful. With jade detailing all over the ring, and even more precious was the message it had, 'It will always be you'. According to him, it was to show how much you meant to him.

And now? Were those beautiful words just thrown to the wind?

He huffed, looking incredibly upset and tired of this situation, but he didn't show you anything, he wasn't sad, sorry, guilty, nothing. As if none of this mattered.

"Have it your way." Completely indifferent he mumbles.

"Okay." You threw the ring away, without even looking at where it went," If it meant nothing to you, it meant nothing to me."

Now he seemed to take some notice of you, but was clearly displeased.

But there was no time for him to talk or complain to you, you ran out of there. He wanted to go after you, but the pride he carried in his chest was stronger.

A feeling of guilt invaded his heart, but he still wouldn't let his feelings get the better of him, because he believed that you would go back on your decision.

You wouldn't exchange him for a group of people you barely know, but that was exactly the point he didn't understand. It wasn't that he wouldn't help you, it was the way he dealt with certain issues. He was so focused and objective, that should be good, but it wasn't the case with him.

He always complained that you think too much about others, just as you complain that his behavior is often harsh and hostile. He believed that you would come back, but he was wrong, very wrong.

it had been three weeks since you had even dared to look at each other. He couldn't swallow his pride, and neither could you. That arrogance and selfishness he possessed could get on anyone's nerves, and you were not immune to it.

No matter how many times you tried to make him understand that things were not practical as he claimed they were, he would never understand, he was a real brute.

And that was the last straw for you, people were not objects that he could control as and when he wanted, and he didn't seem to want to understand that.

You had left the village, and had no desire to return. You had tucked yourself away in a simpler hut and in a place you suspected Morax wouldn't go near. Even though you loved him so much, you doubted if he would ever change.

It was so many doubts mixed with the anger you felt about the things he said, you took it out on the monsters you met in front of you, without letting a single one escape.

With quick and precise blows, you used your blade with an unmistakable dexterity. But even this was not enough for what would happen next. A monster that you didn't even know what it was hit you, and ended up hurting you.

You didn't even know where it came from, you didn't even have time to react. Your body heaved and you fell to the grass abruptly, as you felt a sharp pain run through your entire body.

And when you managed to stabilize yourself and look at the monster, it was no longer there. It had already turned to dust.

"You with this stubbornness. You can't even take care of yourself." From the familiarity in his voice, it wasn't hard to guess that it was your husband.

"Shut up." You mustered the strength to speak, it seemed as if your strength was draining away second by second.

Even in such a state, the weakness and frailty you were in didn't seem to make any commotion in Morax.

"If you knew you wouldn't be like this." So cold, so distant. Every word of his hurt so much.

How could he be so indifferent? So cruel.

"You won't even see your spouse? You won't even try to take care of me?" Even though you tried to sound strong and imposing, all that came out was a shaky, tired voice.

"I'm no specialist in this. Go find help somewhere else, I told you I don't want you around." It wasn't just anger, it was a feeling of someone who had been defied, you hadn't followed his orders, and he was hating you for it.

You had traded him, that's what he had in mind, but you didn't leave because of that. You loved him like crazy, and you had helped him in many ways. But he still needed to think more about others, trust humans more.

To learn to understand that people were not just pawns that he moved when and how he wanted, it was far from that. And now he was experiencing the fact that someone might not follow his orders, and that someone was you.

He went to look over his shoulder one last time, as he began to notice a pool of blood starting to form around you, he hurried his steps over to you.

"I have to take you, the healers will help." Bending down close to you he whispers. The sudden change in behavior that soon showed his desperation.

"You know they won't, there's nothing else to do." You couldn't control the tear that welled up in your eye.

It had been a very deep wound, you didn't need any healer to tell you that you were hopeless, the village was far away, there would be no time to get there. Several other warriors had died like this, and it would be no different with you.

His stoic expression turned to one of terror, his pride gone in a matter of minutes.

"Don't talk foolishness." He nestles you in his arms, carrying you so gingerly that it seemed he was afraid of hurting you with the slightest touch.

"Leave me here," he opened his mouth to protest, and you continued, "Please."

He propped you up on his chest, wrapping you in the clothes of his own body, so that you were properly protected.

"Why are you so stubborn? I can't understand you." For the first time you heard him speak in a broken voice, he was trying not to cry.

"I just want to save time, you know you don't have much to do." You gently caress his face.

He wanted to tell you so much, but he couldn't put it into words, ever.

"I shouldn't have acted like that." Finally, he admitted it. But now it was too late for any regrets.

You intertwined your fingers with his, smiling faintly. He could feel your strength fading little by little, and he could do nothing.

You were too fragile, just like all humans. And he could do nothing.

Nothing.

He couldn't believe it, how could a being as powerful as him be so powerless like that? That shouldn't be right, but it was.

"Please stay." He pleads, but how could you fulfill that request? His voice was so shaken it sounded almost unrecognizable.

For the first time he was losing one of his partners, he had always protected them all as best he could, and none of them had gone so far. But the first was you, his first big loss was you. How would he be able to handle it? No, he couldn't.

"I will never forget your eyes, they are so beautiful." You say softly, almost inaudible.

And he let a tear escape, all the armor he had made in his heart had broken, and he couldn't control it. It was the love of his life leaving, all he could do was watch, how could he be so useless at a time like this?

"Stay, keep your eyes open, I'll get help, I'll…" Not even he himself believed his own words, much less believed that you could save yourself.

He felt so much guilt, how could he have been so negligent? He had never been very sentimental, but now he felt it all at once.

He could hardly describe his exact feeling, because he had no exact feeling. Now he understood all the human emotions you spoke of, a pity he could only understand now, on your deathbed.

The birds were singing, it was a beautiful day, the sun had the most beautiful glow. And yet Morax was there, on the grass with you in his arms, crying in despair like never before. The blood that stained the green of the vegetation, and the pain that remained impregnated in Morax's soul.

And then, like one of those tricks played by fate, everything fell silent. Morax sobbed softly, and made one last plea, "Don't leave me, I really care for you. I love you, stay here." He held your hand tightly, seeing how small it was compared to his.

It was the first time he had been that clear, he had never really opened his heart to you, a shame that the first time he said 'I love you', you were no longer there to hear it.

And as soon as he realized it, a faint cry was all that came out of Morax's mouth, followed by an audible sob. He realized that you died there, nestled in his arms, holding his hand, so angelic.

His beloved had left him, eternally.

Millennia had passed since your death, 3.800 years to be exact. Yet this hurt Morax so much that he was never able to forget you.

Even though he left the Archon life aside, now going by another name, Zhongli, and leading a more modest life as a simple Liyue citizen, the memories he had with you were vivid, shining like gold in his memory.

He martyred himself every day, he blamed himself, a guilt that he would never be able to eliminate from his chest, he would give everything, even his life for you to come back.

And today this feeling was stronger than ever, because it was the day of your death, the day you left him alone in this world. Another year had passed, and even so it seemed like yesterday when you died, at least that's how Morax felt.

And as he did every year, he bought your favorite flowers, picked them carefully to make sure that you would like them. Plus he provided the wine of his choice, it was the only thing that made his mind clear on a day like this, even if he wasn't very used to all that drinking.

When he was ready, he went to your tomb, which was made in the Guili Plains, the place where everything began, and also where everything ended. He always kept your grave clean, after all he visited you every day, no matter how hectic his routine could be, he would always come to your grave daily.

"I missed you, my dear." He says these words to the wind, anyone passing by would think he was crazy, but he didn't care.

He always spent hours talking to you, talking about everything that had changed, and how he had changed. He always thought that no matter where you were, you could always hear him.

Gently he put the flowers on the grave, and sat down on the floor, while pouring himself some wine. "I just wanted to remind you that I love you, more than anything else."

On a day like today, he wouldn't even try to hold back the tears, or the pain in his chest. He caught himself thinking how proud you would be to see the progress Liyue had made, how beautiful the city looked now.

He wanted to show you that he understood what you said in the last minutes of your life, he wanted to show you that you had become a better person. This was due to a great influence of yours, who now was not here to accompany him on this journey.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything I did, my beloved. You would think it magnificent the way everything has progressed, how humans could achieve so much." His voice choked, his face red as the tears came down without stopping.

'His beloved' , was so sweet when it came out of his lips, but so melancholy by the look in his eyes, those gentle golden eyes that expressed so much sorrow.

A love ended in such a way could hurt so much, and Morax knew it. He had experienced it so harshly, but he stood firm to keep the nation you two had fought so hard for standing, and he would keep fighting because he thought it was the way to repay you for all you had done for him.

Every time he remembered you crumbling in his arms, his heart squeezed in such a way. Your face paled along with your frail body, looking as if it would break at any moment. And with that he remembered how much he missed you in his arms, your laughter, the warmth of your body, your beautiful face.

He missed it all, and remembered these moments bitterly, but also joyfully, because he remembered when you were still with him.

He would protect the people at all costs, and keep everything safe as long as he was alive, he would watch over everything you believed in. He would gladly do this for the rest of his days.

Now all he could do was wait, wait for him to take his last breath. And then finally, finally he could meet you, and tell you everything that happened during those years.

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin imagines #genshin x y/n #zhongli x reader #zhongli x y/n #zhongli #zhongli imagines #genshin angst #zhongli angst #zhongli x you

[4pfsukuna]

Hiii❤️can you write some headcanons about sukuna with a asexual reader? It could be modern sukuna or any version. Of course you dont have to if youre not comfortable with it🙏

OMG Can i? This is my first request you can bet Sukunas masochism i can! Originally i had no idea what to write and then i had 17 ideas.

Then i began writing couldn’t save it as a draft it got deleted so now here’s the second idea i had.

It’s not often someone steals Sukunas attention but you do it with ease.

At first he’s annoyed by the way you stare at him with a deadpan gaze. No thoughts, no emotions just gaze.

He’s used to either fear, adoration or lust but you just give him a blank stare it’s torture…he kind of likes it.

• He likes listening to you read, sing and cook you do those things with such passion it engulfs you to the point of you forgetting he’s there.

That’s when he takes the time to Admire  your hair, dark pink curls that resemble the soft texture of cotton Candy… kinda smells like it to. (It’s vanilla) 

and no matter how many times you swat his hand away he cant help it…its pretty. Like you.

He’s infatuated and how dare you not be equally infatuated with him as he is with you?!

You get lots of…gifts. The head of a goat, skull of…something and the blood of your enemies. You don’t want to question how he got any of these things.

“What? Why do you not look happy?” He questions yet youre speechless unaware of the same dead gaze you’re still giving him. He cant read it but he knows its not joy.

“I shower it with gifts and yet still no emotions, these human things are so confusing”

“I’m not a thing or an it im a human and im not emotionless im asexual” 

Now its his turn for the blank stare except you can read his and hes completely confused.

You laugh at his idiocy, how can you not. Or maybe the irony of someone like Sukuna trying  to get you to show emotions.

He wants to hate you laughing at him but he likes the way your plump lips reveal your sharp teeth and you’re shaking with laughter.

He definitely ask uraume about asexuality. Uraume just stares— the same stare you give and it dawns on him uraume is also asexual. 

Sukuna is very hands on hes just adapted to different ways.

Biting? Yes he will bite you just for his own shits and giggles. Hard enough to leave bite marks but never enough to break skin…ok maybe once but he thinks its okay because your blood didnt make him want to eat you.

hes learned your blank stares at this point and this one means you think he’s an idiot.

He also will just randomly pick you up and sit you on his lap as you rant about the characters in your book. And when you think he isn’t listening…

“Sweetheart if they were real id dismember them and make a necklace of their blood for you to wear” he promises wrapping a curl of yours around his finger ignoring the countless times youve told him to stop touching your hair.

This results in you biting his hand. 

He likes having his hair played in, he won’t say it aloud but the soft groans he lets out that turn into snores is all the confirmation you needed.

Imagine how angry he was waking up to an empty bed, hair not being played with to see you talking to one of the guards in the middle of the night.

“Jealousy doesnt suit you, king Sukuna” and he hates when you call him that as if you were nothing more than just a servant and he meant nothing to you.

He uses all 4 arms to make sure he doesnt wake up in the mornings without you. Sometimes he’ll peak one if his eyes open and it’s never long before you feel his gaze and smile.

“Im still here… Now go to sleep before i poke you in your eye” Did you just threaten him? He smirks turning his head the other way… he wasnt willing to risk that.

You sometimes wondered if being asexual bothered him… it didn’t. He like that someone just wanted to spend time with him no fear, no lust, no requirements to do or be anything.

Especially after a long day of being king he just wants to rant about how annoying everyone is especially you since you weren’t there because you were soooo busy.

You went shopping with uraume, who seemed to like you for Sukuna. Though After spending the day with uraume you understood why they were bestfriends. Uraume was equally as unhinged just quiet.

He hates when you use your pointer fingers to direct his frown literally upside down. And your giggle that you let out… he needs to punch something— or turn away so you cant see him actually smile.

When it comes to dates he takes you to grand places he’s not a date person. He heard you talk about stars once so he takes you to the top of the castle and explains each constellation watching the way you hold onto every word with fascination.

Or he shows you his domain for the first time and tells you about war stories and as you look around at the piles of skeletons you notice this may be where he got the skull he gave you as a piece of him. 

You realize he might have a crush on you.

Or the day he avoids you completely after you yelled at him about plucking a fish from water just because only to wake you up at 2am to show you the koi fish pond he had installed with so many different colored fish.

Hes shocked when your tiny body hugs him, laughing in pure excitement before leaning over the lake admiring each and every fish.

Its when you turn back to him the same adoration on your face this time aimed at him that his brain lags for a second. He finally… FINALLY got what he’s been wanting for so long.

and like the greedy man he is he wants more vowing to say yes to whatever you want.

He doesnt process you running back into his arms with pure excitement until you speak.

“Can we get more? I think a bigger lake. Sukuna could you imagine a wall in our bedroom with these fish? Or a secret mini pond in the throne room that can only be accessed by us” 

And the sounds of we, our bedroom and us along with the way your bright eyes gaze up happily and hopefully at him makes his insides hot. 

You never talked about the status of your relationship but he was yours the moment you gazed at him with that deadpan expression. And the way his name rolled off your lips through your razor sharp teeth infatuated does nothing to explain how he feels about you.

#sukuna x reader #sukuna ryomen #sukuna x you #sukuna x black reader #sukuna x y/n #sukuna x oc #sukuna x asexual reader #jjk x reader #jjk x black!reader

[atlantis-just-drowned]

I just finished chapter 15 of 'Love, Death and Rollerskates' and Oh Damn

This post will contain slight spoilers so beware

Guys we already know that Sun also has his memories wiped by Afton but has anyone picked up on the fact that Afton also manipulates both Sun and Moon to hate each other?

I mean listen.

They are both so deeply convinced that the other is a monster. It's not just some manipulative tactic to keep the reader for themselves (as I thought for Sun in the beginning tbh). They really do think it's the truth. But how did they end up thinking this way, and why?

Welp those are very interesting questions but they're not exactly the right ones. What we have to ask here is who does this hatred profit to?

And here we have an answer, and this answer is William Afton.

Why? Because as long as they hate each other, they 1) forget that he's the one controlling them because they both have a scapegoat to blame for their situation and 2) can't team up to beat him, leaving them isolated and powerless.

Which is so damn clever to be honest.

So yes Afton erases their memories, but I also believe he takes this opportunity to fill in the blanks with some made up stories and/or manipulate the truth to nourish their hatred.

The worst part is the fact that he doesn't have to participate that much in it: all he has to do is twist the facts just enough for them to drift apart and stop communicating, and the rest is only a vicious circle of misunderstandings, negative emotions and lack of communication, that will never stop unless they actively seek to break that pattern and communicate.

For now I think Moon is the one who would recognise this pattern the most easily, because he's the most logical one of the two, and he already knows that Sun is being manipulated as well and experiences memory losses, he just doesn't know to what extent this affects his counterpart. Whereas Sun is in complete denial of it all, covering it with some sort of toxic positivity, and the narrative he gives is incredibly self-centred and based on his feelings rather than the facts, making it impossible for him to see the whole picture.

Reader have a crucial role in this dynamic, because both Sun and Moon care about them deeply, making them more keen on listening to y/n and taking their words into account. This is both a disadvantage and a good news: reader can aggravate this circle if they start picking sides and talking negatively about one of them to the other, but on the other hand, they could be able to push through the mutual hatred and get them to talk together again, with a common goal for the two of them: keeping y/n safe, and maybe, break free from Afton's emprise.

Anyway thank you for listening to my rants, I had to type this WHOLE SHIT twice because Tumblr didn't save my first draft lmao

#the autism kicked in tbh #pattern recognition went brrrrr #it kills me how the y/n clearly either have never seen a manipulator at work OR isn't used to masking #like so many things seem out of place to me it's kinda hard to identify to this reader??? #however i am deeply attached to this au and will keep reading this fic lmao #love death and rollerskates #ldr moon #ldr sun #ldr #dca au #fnaf dca #dca fandom #ldr spoilers #fnaf moon #fnaf sun #whispers from atlantis

[nerdieforpedro]

Beginners Guide to your Fanfic Tag game

I was tagged by @wannab-urs and @magpiepills

I didn't forget, I just had to write it down and save it in drafts because sometimes Tumblr will let me do stuff and other times not. 👀

Anyway, you pick however many of your fics you think readers should read first to get to know your work or what you would recommend to them. I think the two lovelies above picked five each so I'll do the same. 🫡 I put in bold themes that can be found in each fic, but do check the warnings. You picks as many as you like. 😄

Drops of Sugar - This ongoing series started with a two part fic that I wrote with Joel Miller (no outbreak - he deserves to be happy especially in my delusions) and Layla (OFC). It morphed into vignettes that I started writing about different points in their relationship. It's easy, breezy and beautiful. Domestic fluff and some smut.

Pleasure Principle - This was my first series (still ongoing) Dave York and Kiara were drawn to each other, have a lot of sex and are trying to figure out feelings. This series in particular had readers point out things that I didn't realize I included. 👀 Like not only a B&E but also that she was not mad at it. Which should indicate how twisted these two are. Also a domestic Dave, but manipulative with groceries and laundry? Smut, angst and feelings.

The Long Road to Together - My longest one shot (16k people like hydrate and have a bathroom break) to date. It features Tommy Miller (no outbreak) and Velora (OFC). My take on a friends to lovers trope that had a few twists because they're both messy. They need Joel and Sarah to be the voices of reason. Joel also has his own sub-plot, becuase Tess. Smut, fluff and angst.

Sard'ika Sessions - My neat six sexy sessions the reader has with Din Djarin, The Mandalorian. Is there smut in every session? Yes. Did I make it gradually increase? Sure and added some non-canon Mandalorian lore that I'm sure is true (in my delusions) which would be in chapter four. There are feelings because sometimes I stick feelings in between the sweaty bits. One thing in this series I did focus on was communication between Din and the reader given how their relationship starts and progresses. I was really happy when people commented and picked up on that aspect. Also a lot of beskar and hands. I in particular enjoyed writing the final session for the cameos I wove in, the blindfold, Din being a complete menace (Maker Yes!! 🙌) and a phrase I didn't realize I stuck in there, "not giving two wookies about what they said or did." 🤣 SMUT, feelings, dash of angst, fluff. (in that order)

Weddings 101 with Dieter - This is neck and neck with Sard'ika Sessions as my favorite. I enjoy all my work (why else would I write it?) But this holds a special place because it's ridiculous, the premise is flimsy and it's just fun. Maya (OFC) needs a lift, Dieter gives her one, there a villa. The goat is a supporting character and has Dieter's back no matter what. Oscar Isaac is slandered and injured (I'm sorry, but I was giggle wheezing while writing his parts it only gets worse) might be an enemy of Dieter's at this point. Oh and there's a wedding? Did we mention that? It's not that important. The weird cloud drum sexy dream I wrote for Dieter is what matters. Priorities people! I envisioned this as the rom-com that I've never seen Pedro in. That's why I wrote it. Not that all this would ever make it into one such movie. 🤓 My attempts at comedy, fluffy as a cloud or a goat, eventual smut, some drug use, future Oscar Isaac mishaps/slander, Dieter's MOUTH AND HANDS. Whatever else I think to put in this thing.

No pressure tags: @musings-of-a-rose @rhoorl @morallyinept @trulybetty @pedroshotwifey @megamindsecretlair @maggiemayhemnj @pamasaur @linzels-blog @avastrasposts @secretelephanttattoo @legendary-pink-dot @i-own-loki @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @gasolinerainbowpuddles @gwendibleywrites @undercoverpena @sin-djarin @soft-persephone @soft-girl-musings @theywhowriteandknowthings

My bad I tagged so many of you, I wanna know about all your stuff. I'm greedy! 😆

@angelofsmalldeath-codeine I know what you're gonna say, but I'm curious what you think of this list. 👀

#beginners guide to your fanfic #a tag game #you tag me #I'm gonna do it #I'm just gonna be slow #because what is brevity? #pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal #Joel miller #Tommy miller #Oscar isaac #dieter bravo #din djarin

[silver-ink-iron-words]

A/N - Okay so I got an incredibly nice ask, requesting a Part 2 of The Best and the Brightest. The asker was so sweet and lovely and they made my day when I first received it

So, like normal, I wrote a Part 2 and created a draft. But instead of hitting the “save draft” button, I hit “post.” I hadn’t finished editing, so in a panic, I deleted it, and now we’re here with a continuation snippet and no request to respond to T_T

Anyways, thank you anon so much for the request, and I hope you like this next part

-------

Part 1

The Best and the Brightest, Part 2

“Hey there beautiful.”

The villain pushed their sunglasses up to the top of their head. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

The hero stood before them, in matching sunglasses and a Hawaiian shirt. Their self-satisfied smirk made the villain want to hit them.

“Great locale you’ve chosen,” they said, settling into the beach chair beside the villain. “Though it seems my invite got lost in the mail.”

“How did you find me?”

“I’ll admit, it wasn’t easy. You cover your tracks like a master, babe.” The hero pushed up their sunglasses and grinned. “It was fun though. Tracking a genius supervillain all the way to their tropical island hideout? I felt like James Bond.”

“It’s not – you know what, forget it.”

The fact that, last time, the hero had managed to sneak into their lair completely undetected made it painfully clear that the villain was spread too thin. So here they were, sitting amongst palm trees and white sand beaches with a fruity drink in their hand. It was supposed to be relaxing.

The villain most certainly did not feel relaxed.

“So what should we do first?” the hero said, pulling out a brochure. “The hot yoga sounds fun.” They waggled their brows at the villain. “Emphasis on hot.”

The villain couldn’t believe this was their life. “How did you even get in here? This is a ‘villains only’ resort.”

The hero squinted. “That’s a thing?”

“Yes that’s a thing. You’re a professional in this business, how did you not know?”

“How would that even work? Do you have, like, a villain ID card or something? Do you need to commit a certain number of verified crimes to get it?”

The villain checked their watch, hoping they radiated disinterest. “If that were the case, you’d get one. I’m honestly starting to lose count of the kidnappings.”

“Not kidnappings, darling. Arrests. There’s a world of difference.”

“Clearly.”

“So come on, quit stalling. What do you want to do?” The hero sat up like an excited puppy. “We could go to the tiki bar and get plastered.”

“I have yet to actually agree to go out with you.”

“Alright. Then agree.”

The villain sat for a moment, taken aback. The hero’s grin widened. It really was as charismatic as the fan blogs liked to say.

The villain didn’t buy it. “Why are you pretending you like me? Is it some strategy your bosses told you to try?”

The hero rested their head on their palm. “Quite the opposite. My superiors don’t even know I’m here.”

“What?”

“Don’t get me wrong, I still have instructions to bring you in. But if they knew you were all the way out here, they would’ve sent a whole team to come secure you, rather than just little ol’ me.”

The villain blinked. “Then why?”

“Because I want to hang out with you, dummy. Before we have to get back to business.”

The villain regarded them. “So after the date is over, you’re going to try to capture me?”

“Naturally.”

“And if I refuse?”

“Then I suppose we’d have to do the business part now.” Their expression sobered, a touch. “That would be a shame, though. I really did want to spend time with you.”

The villain looked them up and down, and then sighed.

“I was planning to go back to my hotel room to see if I can splice poison ivy DNA into some leeches. You can come, if you want.”

The hero raised a brow. “That’s the kind of stuff you do on vacation?”

“Yep.” The villain rose. “Take it or leave it. Because I’m going.”

Without hesitation, the hero followed.

As they walked, the villain checked their watch again. T-minus two hours and forty-two minutes until launch time.

It had, in multiple ways, not been a relaxing vacation at all.

They glanced to the hero, who was smiling at them. They smiled back.

How hard could it be to hold their attention, for just a little while?

#hero x villain #villain x hero #hero #villain #heroes and villains #villains and heroes #writeblr #writing #writing snippet #snippet #please tell me i'm not the only one to make this mistake #and it was such a nice ask too :( #the kind you hold on to and come back to read on a rainy day #sigh #oh well #not a prompt

[frenziedslashers]

Ayo! Ima be honest there, this fic with wounded Handsome Jack x Reader was the first one where I didn't skip a single word, like aaa u did it so great!

I had a thought about something oppsite - where it is the reader who gets hurt, and HJ is the one saving them and taking care... likeeee AAA.... it could be fluff, or something more dramatic and bloody, whatever you thing would be great :D I just can see it written great by your talented hands

This literally made me smile so much??? I am so scared to post Jack content because I always feel like I butcher his character (I have a couple drafts that I have been working on. They are pretty much ready to post, I'm just a little scared. I swear I am not ignoring the Jack asks 👹). I am honored that you liked it that much though! As someone who has read nearly all the xReader Borderlands content on ao3, I totally get that... Some nice I had to skip paragraphs because it was either too ooc or just... Odd... I forget how scary some borderlands fans are 😟 There are a lot of pics on there that I adore, but I feel like every fandom has those pics that you just physically cannot finish. So I am glad that my Jack was good enough 💪💪 ALSO thank you for the love homie. glad you sent in a request! I love me some angst that leads to fluff 😌

Flying Bullets:

"More incoming!" Jack screamed over your com, a grunt leaving your throat as you slammed your body against a crate in a poor attempt to avoid the bullets that flew overhead. You had no idea how you got yourself into this mess. Let alone with Handsome Jack. You knew he was bad news. Everyone despised him, but you still saw him as John, who simply worked with you for Hyperion and was incidentally your best friend as well.

You saw him as the guy who you would sit with alone for lunch break. The both of you talking and laughing over nothing. The friend that would take you out for drinks after a hard day of work and even hit on you here or there. Though, nothing serious ever happened between the two of you.

"Kiddo, answer me!" You snapped out of your thoughts when you heard Jack's voice screaming into your ears. It made you flinch, a cringe settling on your face. "I hear you, Jackie." You responded, shooting a couple times at the Raiders that ran out into your line of sight.

"Are you able to get to where I'm at?" You huffed a bit. As if you would know exactly where he was without him sharing his coordinates. "Where's your location?" "I'm up near the front gate. If you get here we can get to a ship out of this shit hole and back to Helios!" He spoke, and you groaned again. Your shield was low and broken. It wasn't recharging anymore. A problem that you were almost scared to tell Jack. The confrontation would go either one of two ways. He'd freak out, worry, and throw himself into the line of fire to make sure you were safe. Or he'd freak out, worry, and then yell at you for being so stupid and agreeing to go with him to Pandora with a shitty shield.

"Can you do that?" You pondered, "I can try."

It was a hard task to complete. You figured if you did die in this fight you may as well go out guns-a-blazin'. Shooting round after round into the Crimson Raiders that tried to take you down. You nearly made it to Jack, too. If it weren't for a Raider you missed shooting you once, breaking your shield. Then twice, a fatal shot to your back.

The scream that ripped from your chest had your head pounding, and Jack's heading whipping towards you.

"Kid," He stammered, "Kiddo? Pumpkin?" His voice wavered, and then something clicked in the guy. If your vision wasn't blurry from the pain as you lay on the ground. You would have seen the glint of rage behind the mans eyes. The way his face shifted from concern to pure rage. It made the few remaining Crimson Raiders freeze up. Knowing Jack was going to be putting up a hell of a fight.

Screams and gunfire were all you could hear in your ringing ears. You could hardly decipher the screams of the dying to Jack's war cries. If you weren't dying yourself, you might actually feel a bit scared, but right now you could hardly care. Gasping and wincing while lying helplessly on the ground. You could hardly move without your whole body sending shocks of pain through itself.

"Hey, hey," His hand on your back made you cry out again. You hadn't even noticed that Jack was at your side now. Attempting to tend to your wounds to get you back home. Back to Helios where you would be safe and someone could save you. "I know, I have to look at it!" He snapped, but quickly cleared his throat. "Dammit, sorry. I just need to see it. I'm not trying to hurt you, pumpkin." He told you, trying his best to be careful while he moved your clothing up so he could see the wound a bit better. Your cries making him wince himself. You'd think he would have been shot, too. Just from hearing the pathetic noises you were making.

"Oh shit, God this is bad. Why didn't you tell me your shield was low? I could have came to you!" There it was. Option one of how you expected him to react if you would have told him your shield was down. You wanted to smile, laugh a little at how well you knew your friend, but your thoughts were quickly pushed aside when Jack decided to apply pressure. A scream left your throat, and your vision went blurry. It was too hard to stay awake no matter how much Jack pleaded with you to keep your eyes open. You hadn't realized how much he really cared for you until you were nearly meeting your Maker. Vision finally blurring enough that all you could see was black. Your senses dulling, succumbing to the darkness once you passed out in his arms.

Jack had no idea that you had just passed out, though. He thought you died, but that didn't stop him from picking your body up from the ground to carry you back to the ship. He was just thankful that he had people on there to pilot it for him, and some health to at least give you a slight boost until the two of you made it back to Helios.

He refused to let you go until those doors opened. Continuing to apply pressure after he had wrapped his belt and one of his jackets awkwardly around your middle to help stall the bleeding. There was so much blood. His clothes were soaked. His skin was sticky with sweat and blood. The thing of it is, he didn't even know if it was all your blood. Some of it had to be from the Raiders he killed after you were shot. His anger getting the best of him like it regularly did.

"Sir, you need to let them go." He looked up at the nurse in front of him. "What?" His voice was shaky. "I need you to let them go and put them on the table now before they lose any more blood. I need to get them into the infirmary, now." They stated sternly, and Jack nodded with understanding. Laying you reluctantly on the bed. These were his own men and women working for him, but he was so scared to trust them with you. You were the only good thing he had left that was connected to his old life, rather than Angel. You were almost a better memory holder than she was, though. With her being the reason her mother died and all.

It wasn't until later that night, nearly five hours later that Jack was informed that you were in Critical, but stable condition. He knew you wouldn't be able to help him with his plans for the next coming weeks, and honestly, he was glad. Not that he didn't enjoy your help, he just always worried about your safety. This call was too close for comfort. It nearly made him postpone his plans of finding the Vault, too. If it weren't for the fact that he was literally the man's most wanted by the Vault Hunters themselves. That didn't stop him from trying to take care of you to the best of his abilities, though. Even going as far as sending people to check up on you when he was away from Helios.

"Jack," you would say his name, and he would be there. Holding your hand, offering food, water, entertainment, whatever it was you asked. He was giving it to you. You were his light after all. The brightest star in his galaxy. Even if he didn't show you how much he cared, often. He truly did.

It was almost weird for you. He was always so snarky and rude with you. Even if you knew that was just how he showed his affection. How he told you that he loved and appreciated you as a friend without telling you those exact words. You almost weren't sure if you liked how nice he was being with you.

"Why haven't you called me an idiot." He looked up from the book in his hands over to you with raised brows. "Excuse me?" "When I nearly got myself killed. I expected you to at least call me stupid for it. I didn't tell you my shield was broken and not recharging, and yet here you are. Being all sweet and nice to me. It's kind of scary, honestly... You aren't a doppelgänger, are you?" Jack smiled as he placed his book down in his lap. "Well, now that you say it. I did forget to tell you how utterly idiotic that stunt was and if you ever go pulling it again I will personally revive you just to shoot you again." Jack told you, and that caused a smile to form on your own features. There he was. "Oh, so I should have just ignored direct orders?" He rolled his eyes with a sigh. "No, you should have told me what was happening and I could have come to help. You really think I like putting you at risk?" Well, it seemed like it. With the number of close calls you have had, and then this.

He sighed at your lack of a response. "I don't. I really don't. I only take you along because I know you'd find a way fighting those assholes without me or with me. I may as well be there to revive you when you decide to do something stupid." You rolled your eyes this time. "Didn't realize you actually cared about me." He froze up when you said that. You were only joking, and you thought that he could tell, but obviously that seemed to strike a chord with the man before you.

"Oh, so you think I don't care about you either? What the hell has the past few weeks been? I've laid off finding the fricken Vault for you! I've been by your side, making sure you don't die on me and you think I don't care about you?" He shouted, tossing his book to the side while standing to his feet. "Why don't you fill me in on what it is I feel about you then. Why every time I see you I want to blow my brains out because of how much I care about you. Shit, it's annoying, honestly!" Jack started approaching you. Slight more weight to his steps than usual. Obviously pissed and growing more so by the second. "I could have left you to die." He told you, a slight grin on his face as he laughed out of disbelief for himself. "Hell! I would have left any one of my other employees or skilled assassins there to die! But I just couldn't fricken leave you there, now could I? Not when you're the one real thing that I have anymore."

Your eyes were wide. Staring up at the man who was looming over you as you lay on the bed. You looked a little scared, but you were more so taken aback by his words. Yeah, he was basically saying he would have left you for dead if the two of you didn't have a connection, but he was also admitting things that you never thought you'd hear from him.

"I don't mean to yell," Even though that seemed to be the only thing he knew how to do. "I just... I hate that you would even suggest that I don't care about you. I mean, c'mon! Look at everything we've been through!" He exclaimed as he sat on the bed beside you.

Yeah. Everything the two of you have been through. Working together. Getting fired together. Jack gaining power. You gaining power through Jack. Late nights together. Even an attempted date before his ex had come along. It was a lot, and you regretted making him think that you thought he didn't care.

"Jack, I'm sorry. I was just joking around." You admitted, reaching out to grab his hand. His eyes darted down and then back up to study your face. "Could you ever forgive me?" He pondered, a smile creeping on his lips. "Oh, I don't know. I guess I could forgive a cute thing like you." A sigh left your lips, tapping the top of his hand. "If I didn't know any better. I'd say you were flirting with me, Jackie." The way you purred out his name in such a teasing way made his blood boil. Out of annoyance at the nickname, and slight excitement from just the sound. "Well, I could be if you wanna interpret it that way, pumpkin." His hand reached up to brush your chin with his thumb. "I think it's your turn to be called out for your ignorance of my own emotions." His brows furrowed, sighing at his dumbfounded expression.

"So... Was that a yes?" "Jack," "Huh?" "You're as oblivious as the day I met you." He stared at you for a moment longer. "I'm saying yes, Jack. Jesus Christ and you're supposed to be the flirt of Helios?" He let out a groan of his own before carefully maneuvering himself over top of you so he could lay on the other side of you on the bed. "Oh shut it, you're the one overcomplicating shit." He huffed, carefully pulling you close to him to hint that the both of you needed a nap. Whether you wanted one or not. "Just shut up and sleep. We can talk about our stupid emotions later. You ruined the moment by calling me an idiot." "Oh, like you haven't been calling me one for the past 10 minutes. Plus I didn't even call you one!" "Well, that's different, and yes you basically did. I'm not arguing further." "Fine."

#Handsome Jack #Handsome Jack x reader #borderlands #borderlands 2 #borderlands the pre sequel

[hehehereliesmysanity]

H&L first draft (4k words)

Remember this was supposed to be a four-part little story in the beginning and then it turned out to be something more. I found this little thing in my google docs and I just wanted to share the first draft with you. This takes place after the first chapter and they have the movie night then, not 7 chapters and 70k later, oops)

Now, Simon is sitting next to Wilhelm at Manor House, their shoulders are brushing and his side is tingling from the touch alone. He doesn't have a choice but to sit with him because that is the only place available. It is not like a punishment, of course. Deep down inside, he is over the moon to see that he has to sit there. He is playing a dangerous game. He could have easily changed seats with Sara but he doesn't. Wilhelm said he saved this spot for him, but he was probably kidding, right? 

They are watching a horror movie now. Wille clutches to his leg after a jump scare. This party prince who gets into fights in bars is scared of a movie? He can't believe he could be this cute. It was one fight, though, if he was being fair. Simon realizes that what he knows about him and what they say about Wilhelm in these newspapers and on TV are not completely true. He has been so judgmental toward him since the beginning. But he can't trust people easily; life didn't teach him otherwise. So it is understandable.

Wilhelm leaves his hand on his leg and glances at him briefly before turning back to the movie. Simon is almost sure Wilhelm doesn't care about the movie at all. Is he nervous too? Then he brushes his pinkie with his, turning to look at him in the eye again with the cutest smile. He doesn't stop the motion. Can someone forget how to breathe? That doesn't seem possible but Simon can't be sure now.

Wilhelm keeps eye contact and holds Simon's hand in his, intertwining their fingers. He still pretends to watch the movie. He keeps brushing Simon's hand with his thumb. It all happens so fast but Simon can't take it anymore. He is going to fall hard if he doesn't do something. It is not something he can afford. He will be left with a broken heart after all. 

Simon gets up and leaves again. It is too much. It probably doesn't mean anything to Wilhelm anyway. Simon shakes his head and laughs to himself. Of course, something as simple as handholding doesn't mean anything to him. Simon is the only one who reads too much into things. A simple glance, a cute smile coming his way, the way Wilhelm always takes the seat closest to him, the way he listens to him so attentively when he is speaking. It all must be for the show.

He goes and sits on the window sill, opening the window all the way. Wilhelm comes after him after only a few minutes. To say that Simon is surprised is an understatement.

"Are you okay?" Wilhelm asks tentatively.

"Yes. I just wanted to have some fresh air." he lies, sitting still, not moving to look up at him.

"Are you sure?" he asks again, Simon stutters because he is not okay. He is scared. Very scared. And it is too late anyway. Wille rubs his knee briefly and pulls his hand as if it were burned, his eyes going big at the touch.

"Was that too much? Did I cross a line?" he asks with a panicked face. He retreats a few steps back, to give Simon some space. Simon already missed the proximity. And he is taken aback, too. He kinda guessed Wille was not what he seemed anymore. He is actually so sweet and thoughtful. He might not be the entitled prince Simon thinks he is. He seems so, at least.

He is trying to form an answer, to say that he didn't cross a line and Simon wanted to hold his hand too. He didn't know it but he, deep down, wanted Wilhelm to follow him here. 

He wants to tell him he is scared and Wilhelm is not exactly reliable. He doesn't want to be a fling. Okay, maybe the prince is attracted to him but that doesn't mean anything. He wants to say he is wary. He is the party prince, for all he knows. He can't trust him yet. He wants to say it without sounding so hurtful. He doesn't want to stop talking to him. Wilhelm mistakes his silence for something else.

"I am sorry. I thought... I am so sorry." Wilhelm says and turns to leave. 

"Wilhelm." he calls after him. And he stops in his tracks but he doesn't turn around yet.

"Let's forget about what happened earlier. We can start over. We can be… We can be just friends." he says.

"You want to be friends?" Wilhelm asks.

"Yeah, why not?"

"I don't want to be your friend, Simon." he says flatly. Does he sound so hurt? No, he doesn’t. There is no way.

"Okay." he says. He regrets having ever suggested it. Of course, he doesn't want to be his friend. “I wasn’t expecting you to be.” Simon says sadly. “I knew it. I knew you just wanted to hook up and now you don’t have it your way and you act like this.”

“What,” Wille stutters. “I just wanted to hook up with you? Is this really what you really think of me?” Wille asks and his voice sounds so broken and agitated.

“What else am I supposed to think?”

"You really don't get it, do you?" Wilhelm asks, shaking his head in disbelief and hurt.

"What?"

"You really don't." Wilhelm says, trying hard to believe it. "You were right about one thing. I was being so delusional. You were just being friendly and I thought… You still call me Wilhelm. What was I thinking?" he says, shaking his head in disbelief.

"That's your name. Everybody calls you that." Simon says, confused.

"Exactly. Everybody calls me that. You are not everybody. But that doesn't really matter anymore." he says sadly.

"What are you saying?" Simon asks.

"Nothing. Good night, Simon." he says and he leaves. He leaves for the first time without waiting for a reply. Simon wants to stop him. He can't. He just looks at Wille's retreating figure. He doesn't understand anything right now. He should go after him and demand answers. What did he mean? What does Simon not get? What is he talking about? Did he misunderstand him the whole time? When he said he didn't want to be Simon's friend, did he mean he wanted to be something more? What the hell just happened?

Wille is already out of his line of vision, while Simon is still lost in thought. Sara calls him to tell him that their mom is already here to pick them up. He is going to ask his questions after the weekend.

He wanted to comment on Wille's cute blue soft pyjama bottoms, with white heart doodles on them, the whole night. Do party princes dress like that? Simon would have liked to know how it would feel. Maybe he will take a leap of faith and give him a chance. If it is not already too late.

***

Wille ignores him next Monday. Just when he leaves the music room after school, he runs into Wille, who looks like he is caught red-handed. Was he watching him play the whole time? Why didn't he say hi? Playing would be an overstatement, though. He was fighting for his life to play the notes. He probably looked so dumb. He guesses Wille knows how to play the piano. He must know. What kind of prince doesn't know how to play the piano? 

"Can we talk?" Simon asks.

"I have a class. I gotta go." Wille says and he leaves. Look at the turntables, Simon thinks.

*

Wille gets dressed quickly in the locker room after the practice and leaves again. Simon tried to make eye contact but Wille didn't budge. He avoids him the whole week. He doesn't come to the practice in the gym and Simon waits for him patiently until the last minute. He hears from August that Wille said he is sick and he can't make it. Simon is only worried for a second, then he realizes it is just an excuse to avoid him again. Simon considers going to his room to have a talk. Why is he so stubborn?

*

He sees him before the parents’ lunch the next day. 

"Why are you avoiding me?" he asks, straight to the point.

"I am not. Now if you excuse me, August is waiting for me outside." he says and leaves. Simon huffs in annoyance and goes outside to meet his mother. He sees Wille pose for the pictures from afar, and he is grinning like August is the funniest person in the world. The guy takes a couple of pictures of them and Wille drops the mask he is wearing immediately after they are done. He starts talking on the phone, more like pretending to be, and heads for the dorms. Simon is about to follow him but his mom and Sara call after him so he meets them and they make their way to the dining hall for lunch. Wille can't escape from him forever. 

*

They take a seat with Felice and her parents. He is glad that Sara found a friend here. They start eating and they are having an easy conversation. Sara talks about horses nonstop, and everybody listens to her very carefully. It warms Simon's heart. Then he sees Wille enter the room and every head turns to him, of course. Felice gets up from her seat and waves to Wille and Wille doesn't look happy to be noticed.

"Wilhelm, please join us." she says after Wille approaches them.

"Please, have a seat." Felice's mother adds, pointing to the empty space near Simon. Wille takes a seat at the head of the table, visibly upset that he had to join them. Simon realizes nobody but him notices his discomfort. It is probably because nobody knows what happened between them. Wille has a casual, small talk with Felice and her parents and asks them how they are doing. They ask Wille if he likes Hillerska, what he has been up to and such. Wille gives polite answers, and Simon doubts his honesty. Wille doesn't look his way at all, even though they so close. He turns to his mom and introduces himself like a perfect gentleman.

"We haven't been introduced. I am Wilhelm." he says, holding out his hand to shake his mother's hand.

"Linda." his mom says, holding her hand too. "I was starting to think everyone knew each other except me."

"Nice to meet you, Linda." he says. "Now you know me." he says and his mom starts smiling. Of course, Wille managed to charm his mother. But he is avoiding Simon at the moment. How dare he? 

"Are you all friends? They never tell me anything anymore. Teenagers." Linda laughs and the other parents join her.

"That's not true." Sara interjects. "I have told you about Felice." she adds. Yeah, Simon never said anything about Wille. What was he supposed to say? Wille looks upset again. Simon wants to drag him by his arm in the middle of lunch. 

"Yeah, she mentioned your name." Linda laughs. "Once or twice." 

"Why do you embarrass me?" Sara laughs too.

"Are you two friends?" she says, turning to Simon and Wille. Simon coughs a little and drinks some water. Wille answers instead.

"We share a few classes together." he explains. Ouch. 

"They are also on the rowing team." Felice adds. And Wille looks at her, more like sending daggers but she doesn't care.

"I am not on the team, though. I don't know what I am doing most of the time." Simon corrects.

"He is selling himself short. He is really good at it for a beginner." Wille says, looking at him for the first time and goes back to eating. Can they pick up on the tension between them? Simon wonders if this fancy knife can cut this tension. "He also helped me with math. I got a high score thanks to him. Though he had the highest score in class." Wille says, addressing Linda. "You must be really proud." he adds. Simon snaps his head back at Wille, taken aback by his words.

"I am." she says. "I am proud of both of them." She adds and Sara groans in embarrassment and Simon is no different. He moves in his chair awkwardly, and his knee brushes with Wille's and he freezes for a second. Wille is the same. He looks at him with panicked eyes, the same as on movie night. He wipes his mouth with his napkin and excuses himself. 

"Sorry, I remembered I had to make a phone call. Thank you for inviting me to your table." he says. He gets up and leaves. What a bullshit excuse. Simon is really annoyed. How can he keep his manners when he has been avoiding Simon for a week? Does he pretend all the time? He waits for two minutes to go after him. He announces that he is going to the bathroom. Way to be subtle, Simon. Nobody would get suspicious. Felice catches his glance and smiles to herself. What does she think is happening exactly? 

He goes toward where Wille has disappeared. He is actually talking on the phone. Maybe not everything is about himself. 

***

Some unsaved number calls him when he is sleeping. He doesn't realize it's Wille's number with sleepy eyes. Wille had messaged him once, asking why he was not coming to rowing practice. He didn't reply. He wanted to. Would Wille come to Bjärstad if he asked him? But he couldn't ask him. Giving him a chance went out of the window again just because he got flustered and nervous.

"Simon. Simon. Simon. Are you there?" a voice asks.

"Wille, is that you?" Simon asks, looking at the number again. Yes, it is him.

"I like you, Simon. I really like you. Why don't you like me?" he says, slurring his words a little.

"Are you drunk?" Simon asks, his heart beating out of his chest. Both because he is scared that Wille is not okay and because his confession makes him a puddle. He never straight up told him that. Maybe he is saying that because he is under the influence. It doesn't mean anything. “A drunk mind speaks of a sober heart,” he thinks. But no, he won't get carried away.

"Yes, only a little." he giggles. Simon's heart soars, that is such a beautiful sound.

"Where are you? Are you safe?" he says, panicked.

"I am in my room, on my bed. Yes, I am safe. Are you worried about me?" he asks, sounding excited. "But you don't like me." he finishes sadly. Simon thinks, “If only you knew how wrong you are.” That's not the time, though. That needs to happen face to face, if Simon doesn't chicken out.

"Do you have water near you? Drink lots of water, okay?" he says. He knows what to do in these situations, sadly.

"I have. I will. You are sweet. So so sweet, Simon." Wille says. Does he sound dreamy? Simon wants to go to him right now. He wants to tell him. "Simon. Simon. Simon. Even your name sounds so sweet." Wille says. Simon is about to combust. His name is really sweet, yes but only because it is dripping from Wille's lips. He wants to hear his name on his lips in person, preferably while he is kissing him. He knows Wille is drunk but he sounds so genuine and real. Simon won't be able to hold back anymore.

"Good night, Simon. I am sleepy." he says.

"Good night, Wille." Simon says softly. "Sleep on your side, okay? Just in case you throw up. Not on your back." he adds.

"Okay, Simon. Thank you." he says, sleep oozing out of his voice. "Simon, Simon, Simon." he says again fondly. Does he try to kill him? "I even like your name so much. You know what's funny? It means listening. Your name... It means listening. I looked it up but you don't listen to me. You always run away." he laughs. Simon laughs too because Wille laughs and because he thought Wille would forget his name, but he looked up what his name means. He is going insane, holding the phone like a lifeline. He is so stupid because of him already. "I like you and that's not fake, Simon. I don't know how to make you understand that. Maybe, you do but you don't just like me. It is okay. I think I need to accept that now." he says. And Simon wants to object but he wants to tell him in person. He is drunk anyway. "Good night. I am gonna go now." he says and the line goes silent. But Simon's thoughts don't. He probably won't be able to sleep until tomorrow. Until he sees Wille tomorrow.

***

He wants to catch him before he leaves his room. He didn't go in when he dropped him off at his party but he knows his room. He knocks on the door. Wille opens it, not looking as presentable as he always does. 

"Hey." Simon says softly.

"Hey." Wille says, not looking in the eye.

"How are you?" he asks.

"Not bad. I didn't drown on my own puke, if that is what you were asking." Wille says. He sounds cold, and Simon wants to turn back and go but he doesn't. 

"Do you have a headache? Maybe you should take an aspirin." Simon says.

"I am fine, thanks. You didn't have to come all the way here to check up on me. Sorry for making you deal with me yesterday. I need to go to class now. So I have to get dressed if you excuse me." he says and tries to walk away, closing the door. 

"Wait, wait, wait." Simon is the one who stops him this time, holding him on his arm. Wille freezes and he finally looks at him, surprised and maybe ashamed. 

"The classes don't start for about half an hour. We have time. I have to tell you something." Simon says, enters the room without getting an invite and closes the door. Wille looks at the closed door and Simon in his small room slowly, back and forth, clearly puzzled.

"I know we still have time, Simon. I don't want to hear what you're going to say now." he says with a long sigh.

"Why are you running away?" he asks. "That's usually my brand." he laughs but Wille doesn't laugh. If anything, he looks sadder. "You don't even know what I am going to say." he says.

"You don't have to." he sighs. "Okay, Simon, I get it. You made yourself really clear, like the whole time but I didn't want to see it. You don't like me. I never wanted you to feel uncomfortable. I am not some asshole who doesn't take no for an answer. I just thought you also…  Never mind what I thought." he says, sounding exhausted.  "When I woke up, I remembered that I called you last night. I am surprised you didn't hang up on me. I don't know what we talked about for 20 minutes. It is still blurry."

"So you don't remember what you told me last night." Simon says, a little disappointed.

"Of course I do. I don't have to remember what I might have told you last night. It is only what I am always trying to tell you the whole time. Anyway, thanks for trying to take care of me. You didn't have to, but you did. I don't know why. It is probably only because you are the only person who is genuinely nice without having an agenda. Unlike what you thought about me, people being obsessed with me only because I have a title is the last thing I want. If you wanted to get to know me, the real me, you would know that. But clearly, you don't. So, I don't need to hear you tell me you don't want me. I like you but you don't like me back. It is as simple as that. I get it now. I am going to stop." he says sadly.

"What if I don't want you to?" Simon says with a small smile. “What if I don't want you to stop?”

"What?!" Wille asks, baffled.

"You heard me, Wille." he smiles.

"Oh." he smiles shyly. 

"Yeah." he says.

"Not Wilhelm?"

"No, not anymore."

"Oh. This is the first time you..." he says with a blush.

"Not the first time. You probably don't remember our whole conversation last night." Simon smiles.

"Oh, probably not." he laughs.

"I am glad you remember most of it, though." he smiles. 

"Did I wake you up last night? Were you sleeping when I called?"

"Yes, I was but I didn't mind. I am glad you were okay." he says, playing with his fingers nervously.

"Thank you for taking care of me again. I am still sorry for calling you at such an inappropriate hour." 

"Don't worry about it." Simon says.

"Are you sure?”

“Yes.” 

"So… What exactly did you mean earlier? When you said you don't want me to stop." he asks timidly. "Does that mean you like me?" 

"Yes, I do."

"I like you, too."

"I know." he laughs. "You told me last night. A couple of times, actually."

"Did I embarrass myself that much last night?" he asks, averting his eyes, with bashful smile.

"Only a little. You said you liked my name." 

"Oh. I mean, I do. So…" he says. 

"And you looked up what my name means. And you were complaining about me not listening to you." he says and Wille groans in embarrassment.

"It was sweet." Simon continues.

"Really?"

"Yes, but not you getting drunk."

"August invited me and offered me beer. I am a lightweight, actually. Don't tell anyone. I have a reputation to uphold." he smiles.

***

"Umm, are you free tonight?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Is there another football match we can go to?"

"How do you know I went to a game?" Simon asks, raising one eyebrow. "Did you stalk me?"

"No." Wille says, like a child caught red-handed.

"You are so lame." 

"Only a little. Maybe, you can show me around Bjärstad tonight. What do you say?"

"Are you trying to make me ask you for a date?"

"Umm, kinda. I don't know this area very well so it doesn't make sense if I invite you to hang out in your own neighbourhood. And I can't invite you to hang out at school, can I?"

"I thought you would invite me to your room." Simon says suggestively.

"Umm, I am not like that. I am not like how they write about me in those newspapers. I like partying, yes but I am not hooking up with someone different every night. I am not judging anyone who does but I am saying I am not like that. You know that now, right?"

"Yeah, I can see it now. Why don't you deny those rumors, though?"

"They will believe whatever they want to believe. I just stopped trying."

"Oh, that sounds annoying."

"It is annoying. I don't care what anyone thinks anymore. I am just trying to live my life. That's why I wanted to come out. It took some time to convince my mom."

"Did you have to convince her, for you to come out?"

“Kinda, yes.”

"I am sorry for judging you. And not giving you a chance to get to know you."

"It is okay. I probably didn't leave an impression for you to think otherwise. I might come off a little pushy and cocky."

"A little, yes. But you are not either of those things. So why did you?"

"I don't know. I wanted to impress you; I was trying to seem suave and confident. After your comment in class, I thought if I were myself, you would think I was a loser." 

"So you thought you should act like an entitled asshole because I basically called you an entitled asshole?" Simon laughs.

"Not my brightest moment." Wille laughs back.

"But you were right."

"About what?"

"That I wanted to get your attention in that class."

"Oh, okay."

"And I wanted to kiss you, too. In your initiation party. And I still want to, probably since the whole time." Simon says and Wille blushes so beautifully.

"But we need to go on a date first." he says with a smile and walks away, looking back at Wille, who is still frozen in his place. Wille chases him again.

“How about today?”

“Sure.”

"Okay. What time?"

"I will text you." Simon says.

"Okay. Great. Can't wait." Wille says excitedly, rushing to get the words out. Simon's heart is doing somersaults.

"You are not going to try to kiss me now?" 

"You said date first." Wille says, raising his eyebrows, looking blank and confused.

His mouth slowly start to turn up at the corners. Simon couldn’t be more wrong in his life.

And they were gonna have their date in Bjarstad and their first kiss was gonna be in front of Simon's house in the rain when Wille was dropping him off. I even thought about interrupting their kiss in Wille's room in ch7 but I knew you would find me and kill me so I changed it :D also keep in mind that they don't know much about each other in this draft and I really liked that I changed it in the current version.

#young royals #wilmon #honey and lemon #yr fic #btw i feel like people didn't like ch8 that much #i hope i am wrong #if you are reread h&l please free to comment again bc it makes me so happy #sorry again for updating twice a year :(

[basedkikuenjoyer]

A Marvelously Wonderful Life

1102 was a very tough chapter to write about. I usually have a draft ready from the Raws, but here there were a few angles I had to look at it from. So y'all are getting a Christmas bonus. On the surface this is just a cool, cool chapter. We split between Kuma and Bonney's stories, showing the former's side of known events. It's so moving in it's own right, do remember part of why I choose to focus on the meta narrative aspects is because it's hitting very close to home. And y'all this one's a doozy. Bookends. So this flashback begins with Ginny saving the day at God Valley the way she did and now ends with Kuma setting a precedent for the exact narrative trope we're looking for? Showing hidden sides of known events.

That's it, that's like...the entire foundational building block of all this weird shit I've said. Kiku was perfectly set up to do this with all of Wano, but it'd really start looking like a new recruit narrative fast. It's not just saying that the same way anyone could do that, we've pointed out several specific places where you could guess something happened based on context clues. Miss Unassuming is kinda the #1 archetype to pair with a twist told that way. In essence, this flashback starts and ends by setting a precedent. That's one way you could look at it, given I can tie both to Victoria Cindry is blowing my mind.

You cheeky lil shit. Don't worry, I'm not getting ahead of myself. This could just be a last note of the flashback and next chapter we're back to fighting Saturn. Kuma pops in to save the day with a last ounce of humanity, the miracle we didn't see with Cindry. Tomorrow we'll talk big picture, why I still wonder if this is a red herring walking the same line as Yamato. But first we have to ask the basic question, where does 1103 go from here? Because it can do that...but did we see it? A repeat of how we came back from the big cutaway. When we skipped the night in the lab. Is this the start of us coming back to that? Don't forget that was a double-bluff too.

That is an intriguing possibility. Always cool when you see the concept you expected but in a different way that's instantly so much better. Yeah, that is the way to play with the flow of this narrative. Skip the night, get to the high drama, fill in the night, finish the fight. To me, if that's what we're doing then this is almost assuredly heading towards the "Double Rashomon" idea. There'll be one more segment away. Maybe it's the alternate take on Wano. Maybe that's through Sword and Drake's report. Maybe it's the two Stussys as a pretext to let Marco do it. Maybe it's something completely different with or without alt-Wano as the fourth, real one. Neat right?

Crackle. Oh man, story's picking up another frequency again. There's something I'm left with here. Kuma's a total patron saint of teddy bears and genuinely good dudes everywhere. He's so cuddly and sweet and I know some of y'all are gonna hate me for this but he's also kind of a trusting idiot. So it's interesting you have that "Bakura" split personality element seep in.

We've broached this subject before, it's where Okiku was an evolution of Himura Kenshin. Which is really just the difference between a man making big, grandiose axioms about nonviolence vs. a sensible, pragmatic woman who will bear the burden of doing what's necessary as a last resort. Remember how much Kuma's sacrifices troubled Ginny. A little more grit and realism from the very spiritual Kuma probably would have been better for everyone involved, but at least people end up remembering you as a figure like Oden.

Makes this little crackle very interesting. It theoretically works as a Chekov's Gun; a way for Kuma to have a happy ending if Vegapunk snuck it in anyways. Or it works as a roadmap for where Kuma, saintly as he may be, fell short and is part of something bigger. Recall, we do make a point of showing something similar out of Vivi losing her cool in a tense conversation with Cipher Pol. (Psst, and Stussy setting up still struggling with personal identity issues that are silly to worry too much about.)

#one piece #post wano musings #chapter 1102 #bartholomew kuma #jewelry heckin bonney

[curatoroffiction]

hey curator!

I was wondering how you keep things organized in large stories (such as Deja Vu). I am having TWST au ideas, and I'm getting a little overwhelmed trying to figure out how everything would tie together and how to keep it organized.

seeing how well fleshed out Deja Vu is inspired me a bit to try my hand at writing. even if I never share it, I'd like to make an attempt.

Ah! That sounds really exciting! To all my followers looking for some TWST content, definitely keep an eye out on this person's stuff. As for organization, I have a few systems in place. First, to organize information, I have an entire document labeled "Stuff you want to touch on and don't want to forget" - And it's FILLED with information that's quickly and easily accessible to me. The series didn't start off with that though, so my disorganization might actually be easier to see in earlier chapters if you look closely enough! I did try to fix my major inconsistencies when I went through and re-formatted everything though. It really helps with organizing my thoughts and details so I don't have to re-read old chapters, which is what I was doing originally. It also makes sure to keep me from making major inconsistencies, because as I'm writing, I can go "Now wait a second, MC experiences time at a different rate than the demons in devildom. They wouldn't normally be awake at noon-" and I can make adjustments to the chapters I'm writing so they stay aligned with all the stuff I've already formulated. Things will still slip through the cracks with this method though, especially as your stories get bigger! I highly recommend organizing within your document, so you have areas appropriately dedicated to different segments of story details. Some good organization sections I recommend: - World Lore (Important details about the world and how it works, that aren't established in cannon) - Loose Ends (Things you've left hanging that you plan to pick up later, but don't want to make your chapters too long, or you want to do this in the background.) - Key Relationship Moments (Any moments that benefit or damage the relationships between characters, so you can make sure you're writing more consistent relationship dynamics and not forgetting any weird things you left hanging, or any important segments that need to be addressed.) (I would HIGHLY recommend organizing this one by characters, so you can skip over to "Has Riddle had any weird or notable moments with anyone that would be a fun callback in this chapter?" without having to re-read every character interaction you've ever written for that series, lmfaooo) You can definitely add more or less segments to fit your writing style, but these ones have helped me a TON. Secondly, the other organization system I have in place is how I write chapters. I save them all as separate chapters instead of writing into one massive document. This helps me organize my thoughts by the chapter instead of getting lost in all the other stuff I've written. This also allows me to reframe a chapter I've written as "First draft", "Second draft", ect.. and completely re-write the chapters without getting rid of anything I've written in case I want to use it. In a similar vein, I have a master document that holds ALL of my cut content from my Deja Vu series, which allows me to edit very strictly so that the flow for each chapter is a lot better than when I started writing, and I don't lose any of those things. There's so much that gets dropped on the cutting room floor for my Deja Vu series, which can be really hard for me, so I tuck it all away so I can always come back to it later. The last two are more of an "Organization for an easily-scrambled brain" kinda advice, but I do hope that helps you on your writing journey! Thank you for reaching out!

#Twst #Twisted Wonderland #Ask #Writing ask #writing asks #Fanfiction advice #Writing Advice #writing tips #Fic stuff #Fanfic writing #fanfic writer #fanfiction writer #fanfiction writing

[egglands-worst]

I remember forever ago I asked if you had any good dadster fics to recommend since you are THE gaster artist and I love your interpretation of him. I can’t seem to find the ask anywhere thou

a- aaAHWWWOWEEE HHHUUUOOUUUUGHHHHH i wouldn't say I'm The Gaster Artist not in a longshot there's lots of other artists who do fantastic gaster stuff!!! but i am Flattered you say that!!

anyway you can't find it because it got sent to Tumblr Drafts Hell (aka i started it, saved it to go look for fics, and then completely forgot about it)

BUT IM DOING THIS ALL AT ONCE THIS TIME SO I DONT FORGET

Behold: a readmore

longer fics:

the doctor's fate series by @aeris-blue

weird old man ends up adopting a couple little skeletons. it's SO good soooooo SOSO so good 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Schrodinger's gate

gaster bounces across dimensions picking up children on the way. it's. I'm not one for much au crossover stuff but!! i really enjoy this one a whole lot!

A Year Every Minute by @askullandbones

this is a Classic(tm) to me. started being written Early fandom (crossposted to ao3 later) aaaaaand definitely influenced my own characterizations of gaster in little ways. it DOES get really angsty later on so be aware (whenever i reread it i usually just do the first eight chapters). this gaster is basically. like. makes a child for science purposes and gets way too attached

the life and two deaths of (dubiously a doctor) w. d. gaster by @saurosuchus-ostraviensii

(which!! updated just barely actually!!!! i still have yet to sit down and read it i just barely got outta class and did this)

i admit there's not actually any dadster in it yet. but the presence and Promise of dadster later on Is There and it's genuinely a Great read. i swear i have no biases because my friend wrote this

alphys bad dates fic papyrus chapter by @smells-like-mettaton

honestly this is alphys centric i just think gaster moment is absolutely hilarious

imaginary friend

frisk!!! frisk befriending some guy

and last but not least just look at all these dadster fics in my ao3 bookmarks

(there's probably a lot more dadster stuff that's just untagged)

#answered #fic rec #dadster #gaster #AHAHAHAHAHA NDONRNNNE DONE

[novafire-is-thinking]

How do you create a poll? I’m thinking of creating one but I’m not sure how to really start and get it running, any advice if you’re fine sharing?

How to be a Poll Master…maybe

(by Nova the Poll Peddler)

Option 1: Go solo (for the Perceptors, Nightbeats, and Cyclonuses)

You’ll need at least a week of little-to-no planned activities, depending on the size of the bracket. The only reason I’m able to dedicate my time to this is because I’m in between school stuff and can’t work right now.

Google Sheets is your best friend. Make bracket lists, keep track of results, etc. I have a separate Gmail that I use for all of my TF things through Google. It’s not necessary, but it helps for keeping things organized.

Don’t cram like I did. I burned out my already-unpredictable proofreading abilities by trying to have all 82 polls set up in my drafts in one day. Break up your setup over a few days.

Whatever you do, do NOT try to post the polls privately and switch them to public to “save time”. I made this mistake TWICE for all 82 matches before I realized that you can’t edit a poll once it’s published (even privately). 🫠

Backup plans are good, but you’re limited without outside help. If you’re doing things solo and something goes wrong, you’ll either panic or pick yourself up because you’re stubborn and have trouble relying on others.

Option 2: Collaborate (for the Swerves, Tailgates, and Rodimuses)

Find a mutual or friend you trust with whom you can open a shared Tumblr to run polls from. A sideblog or a brand new primary blog will work. Personally, I’d prefer to open a primary blog if I were to ever collaborate.

Make sure your schedules are compatible.

Unless one of you is cool with doing ALL of the detail work, split it up. Just don’t forget to communicate what you’ve completed so the other person doesn’t do double the work by accident.

Better yet, assign various tasks at the beginning (poll setup, update posts, spreadsheet duty, etc.) and stick to those unless it’s not working for one of you.

Have a backup plan or two in case one of you is unable to finish the event.

If you think it’ll help, check each other’s work along the way. Just don’t be nitpicky like me. lol

There’s more that can be shared, but I don’t want this to get too long in case this was all you were looking for to get started. :)

If you or anyone else has questions related to running poll events, feel free to send an ask or DM me and I’ll try my best to help out. That is, unless I’m struggling with the same problem. lol

#transformers polls #asteroid belt of asks & answers #nf.note

[soliloquent-stark]

For fic writer's year in review: 17, 25 and 30 🥰

17. What were your go-to writing snacks?

not gonna lie, when i'm in the flow, i completely forget about everything around me, but i probably always have a (cold) cup of tea, something chocolate-adjacent, and fruit (preferably grapes, mmm) next to me. salty snacks are my favourite but i don't trust myself to eat them when i write because i do it so absentmindedly that before i know it, the crisps/cheese/pickles i had vanished, and my body turned into an infinite sodium supply.

25. What did you use to write? (e.g. writing programs, paper & pen, etc.)

i jot down ideas in a notebook sometimes when i need a bit of clarity, but otherwise, i do all of my planning, research, structuring, and everything else including the final draft on notion; i find it pretty good for organisational purposes.

30. What’s something that you want to write in 2024?

without giving much away—mostly to save myself the embarrassment when i inevitably fail to post any of it—i want to finish honey whiskey, post more in the ctrl-alt-deceit universe (my beloved), complete some bite-sized works (a challenge the wife set for me, as currently, it seems i can't write anything under 6k), and embark on this longer, world-building, period piece that i am pretty excited about, but who knows if i'll be capable of it. 🥹

fic writer ask

#thank you deb <3 #i'm a sad sad girl drowning in drafts and ideas with zero brain capacity to do it #writer ask #answered

[kenthenugget]

How Batching Comics Saved My Life

Jesus its been...quite a while since I last posted onto any of my tumblr accounts. Its not that I didn't forget that I had an account here, its just that I've been busy with school and my drawing Crescent Blue. Meaning any free time I have is limited which results in me neglecting like half of my socials. Comics and college has made doing social media difficult. That and I wasn't sure how to handle 2 out of the 3 tumblr blogs I have. But I've thought that I had use this specific blog for text blog posts, along with drawings I'm working on and stuff like that. Most of it will be a lot of writing type stuff like this so this should be fun. Anyways, onto the topic I wanted to talk about.

I've been drawing Crescent Blue for coming on 4 years now. And those 4 years were spent drawing its first Chapter. Its overly long chapter. I have realized the mistake I made back when I was prepping to draw it back in 2019, where 16 year old me who had never drawn a comic at this scale decided to go out adapting the opening chapter draft which was written to be the length of a double length tv show pilot (because that's how wrote scripts back in the day) without realizing the implications of how many pages I would have to draw, and that maybe I should've done more prep work to make sure I wouldn't be working on it well into college. Because I probably would've gotten burnt out with it after being stuck on it for so long. And that would end up happening when 2021 rolled around. Thanks to mental health struggles I faced through out 2020, which lowered my tolerance to drawing comics which I didn't enjoy, I had drawn a total of 28 pages by going into the new year. Feeling ashamed of that pace, I managed to motivate myself and make it a new years goal to devote more time to my comic and get faster in order to complete my first chapter. This manifested in a couple of ways, from illustrating backgrounds in graphite as to avoid inking them and potentially screwing them up, to manning up and move to drawing it digitally as opposed to traditionally (I did not have access to photoshop or a good drawing tablet when I had started so I did what I had always done and use paper, pencils and inking pens/brushes. However, I would get my XP Pen Artist 12 for my 17th birthday 2 months later, and I would be able to use photoshop at home by early 2020). But what I mostly did was focus on drawing pages more, moving onto the next one after finishing the last one without taking a break. Basically muscling my way through with the expectation that I would eventually get faster. This did not work, and here's why.

This one by one approach isnt bad on paper, and there are plenty of artists out there that drawing comics this way and don't have any issues. For me, the issue I found with this process was that it didnt lend itself very well to spend. Not all pages are created equal, taking longer or shorter to complete depending on the complexity of the drawing. In my experience, there were pages that took only a couple of hours to complete, and others that took days to get done, and this isn't factoring in stuff like school. This aspect brings up the problem with me muscling through pages. There are times where I dont want to work on my comic, and often times after I would finish a page, I wouldn't have enough motivation to get to the next one. But in my attempt to not spend years drawing my first chapter, I would force myself to draw pages even when I didn't want to. This results in numerous cases of burnout and art block, which can cripple you and slow you down, defeating the point of muscling through it all. One notable instance of this I can remember happened in February last year.

By July of 2022, I would've been drawing Chapter 1 for 3 years and as my new years resolution, I wanted to get it done by that time. I had made great progress in 2021, catching up to page 75 by the time of new years, and I felt confident in my ability to get it done that year. That hope was shattered when I did what I had done with one of my pages and complete a future page ahead of time. Said page was the last post I made on this blog which I've actually completed a few weeks ago. The numbering for that page is 148 (was probably lower last year as I did end up adding pages during that time thanks to rewrites). And at that time, I had just passed the 80th page mark. It was then that I realized the implications of what I needed to do in order to get Chapter 1 done that year. I would've had to draw more than double the amount of pages I had drawn in 2021, and given the way I was drawing comic pages at the time, I knew deep down that wouldn't be possible. But not wanting to admit it, I tried muscling through the pages I was working on, hoping that if I pushed myself beyond my limit I would miraculously become faster and more efficient. But that didn't happen. The stress caused by my realization and the refusal to accept it caused me to become more and more agitated, which caused me to make errors and not draw as well as I would've wanted. Said agitation also clouded my thoughts and made drawing more and more difficult as soon as I knew it. I had burned myself out.

I think I've done a good job at laying out why this method didn't work for me, and if I was still drawing comics this way, I would not be finishing my first Chapter this year. And at this point, I would like to take a moment to shout out @the-underground-beauty. If it hadn't been for her, I not have found out about batching and I wouldn't have been even close to ending this long ass chapter. I was in a discord call with them and other art friends I knew, and I talking about ways of becoming faster at completing pages. They explained that they batched multiple pages instead of drawing them one by one like I had. Like, you would do the layouts for one page, then you would do the layouts for the next page, same goes for sketching and inking. This makes it so that instead of dumping all of your energy into one page, you're spreading that work into multiple pages and thus, become more efficient. Now you might be wondering how this would be better than my old method. Wouldn't working on multiple pages at the same time instead of going one by one be worse? In my experience, it's the complete opposite.

Along with the upsides I've mentioned above, its also very flexible in regards to inking/coloring. In the past, I found myself getting board with pages and wanting to move onto the next one but couldn't because I had to finish the one I was working on. I don't need to worry about that with batching. I can go in chronological order or skip pages to come back to them latter. This can be very handy when it comes to complex pages that would take a lot of time to complete. If Im not feeling up for it at that moment, I can just skip that one and come back later once I feel ready. It also points out the most time consuming part of drawing comics, sketching. Inking is one thing, but when you're doing a lot more work when doing the sketches. And depending on what the storyboards call for, the sketching process for a given page can take a pretty long time and a lot of energy. But with the batching process, the energy I would've spent finishing said page with inking and shading/coloring can be better spent on other pages. This means that I would need to worry a whole lot when inking as most of the hard work was done prior.

Batching also helps with putting what you're working on into perspective. Throughout most of my time drawing my comic, I found it difficult to view the pages I'm working on as being apart of a much larger story, rather than on a page by page basis. I would spend so much time on them that I would view the page I was working on as being its own separate thing, unrelated to the pages that came before or after. Batching, in a way, solved this issue, because now that Im working on a part all at once instead of going page by page, it helped me view what I'm working on as being pieces of a story, rather than being their own thing. I felt that the pages I was batching had more unity to them than the ones before it. Its difficult for me to describe this feelings, because I would always get it when finishing a part and rereading it. Pages that would take weeks to complete took more a couple of minutes to read, despite the specific pages taking so much time to finish. I haven't had that feeling after adopting batching as my new method of drawing comics, since every page all at once.

But how has it worked in practice? Well to see if batching was effective or not, I decided to batch the remaining six pages of what would by episode 7 on CB's tapas page. I got those done in a week. And 2 months later in May, I began work on pages 95 through 105 and this was the true test to to see if batching could really be effective for an entire part. I got it done with in a month. The after that wasn't as successful, but I mostly contribute it to external factors that had nothing to do with batching. At the start of this year, I decided to ditch the part by part method and go at the remaining 67 pages of Chapter 1 all at once. At the time of writing this, I'm still not finished with this Chapter yet but I don't expect it to be for quite long. I anticipate on wrapping it all up around June of this year. So with all this being said, I think I can conclude that batching comics has been way more effective in terms of speed. Over a 100 pages over the course of one year, way more than I had in the past with the old method. If I hadn't switched up the way I had been drawing comics back in March of last year, I don't think I would've come this far! Now I am aware that batching might not work for other artists, and that's fine. But if you are in a place like I was and want to get pages done quicker, I suggest giving it a try and see if it works for you or not :)

#comics #webcomics #art #artists on tumblr #art tips #artist rant

[borreloadsavagedragon]

Maybe Mizael and/or Takeru for the ask meme?

OH! I'll do both absolutely

MIZAEL

First impression: TERRIFIED!! He was stupidly pretty and had a dragon, I knew he would end up a favorite, but I didn’t know how MUCH of a favorite, I needed to know what his problem was dhdhdhd

Impression now: I can't even put into words how much I love Mizael sometimes omfg, he had such an impact on me and I'm a little saddened at how quickly he was removed from the story in the end I need to rewatch more of his scenes, I'm very insecure about how I write Mizael and I really want to get his voice down One day I’ll finish his cosplay wig too, if I style all of the wigs for my favorite ships, I can convince people to cosplay with me surely (copium)

Favorite moment: His introduction is wild, like both him arriving to Alito and Girag but also him challenging Yuma Miza just shows up, shoots Tori with an energy blast, and then is just like we're dueling But then COMPLETELY forgets about Yuma as soon as Kaito shows up and whips his dragon out Also love when they have their little Barian meetings where they just bicker, they're truly real housewives

Idea for a story: I always have Mizael and Kaito ideas gjdkslajg Whether they're fics or oneshots, time usually tells, but my drafts definitely have quite a few for them saved Usually lots of dragon focused ones, obsessed with the idea of Photon and Tachyon eloping and them having to just deal with it Mizael going over dragons with Haruto...

Unpopular opinion: I don't know if there is anything the small Miza community doesn't agree on honestly jgdsklaj I'll just start drama, Miza's not a natural blonde

Favorite relationship: I feel like I don’t even need to say haha, Kaito and Mizael are incredible and I am cursing Zexal forever for not giving them more time because I feel like I'm blowing out steam looking at all of the loose threads I also love how much Durbe and Mizael respect each other, there's clearly a bond there between them, wish we saw it more I also wish we could have seen more of Mizael and Nasch since you can tell Mizael revered him quite a bit-

Favorite headcanon: Mizael 100% moved in with the Tenjos!!!!!!!

TAKERU

First impression: Oh I KNEW I was gonna love him the second I saw his face omg I did the bad fan thing where I had to pull up the wiki bc the Vrains episode I was watching at the time didn't answer a really niche question I had about something someone said and the "related pages" tab on Yusaku's character page had Takeru's face on it So I had to find him I speedran my Vrains watch to get to him and boy was I rewarded

Impression now If you asked me in 2021 who my favorite yugioh was, I'd tell you Takeru Homura in a heartbeat Literally was only dethroned as my favorite by Kaito recently Takeru would be the next character I deep dive and dissect if given the chance, I just think he's so cool, I love how well done he is, I think he's one of the best done characters in the franchise His deck is fun, his design is fun, I've cosplayed both Takeru AND Soulburner now, working on slick back look one day when I don't have cosplay deadlines I just... love him, he's one of my favorite voices to write through, I always find an excuse to drabble as Takeru, whether it's something I post or not, and I am always at home when it's with him

Favorite moment: ALMOST ALL OF THEM!!! BOTH OF THE DUELS WITH REV! HIS INITIAL ENTRANCE! HIS FLASHBACK SCENES! BEING CRINGEFAIL!!! AAHHHH!!!!

Idea for a story: Oh I've got a REALLY hefty 3+1 fic that's gonna tie in with recoil week that explores all of Takeru's relationships gjdkla Here is a very small bit from the first chapter:

The first time Homura Takeru thought he fell in love, he was a young boy intimidated by a pretty girl. He doesn’t remember many of the details of how he met Kiku. It was a portion of his memories that lived in what feels like a lifetime ago, before everything had suddenly slipped out of his young grip. He just knew that he was a scared boy overwhelmed by her kindness and spirit the moment they met while he was on a trip to visit his grandparents.  It was an instant connection. Kiku had pulled on his hand and pulled him into the light, smiled and laughed with him whereas the other kids at the time hadn’t. He’d almost call it foreshadowing. Having her in his life made the sudden change of up and moving out to the country after his parents’ deaths a little easier. Within a month of moving, they were almost inseparable. And the following years as well, no matter how hard it got.

So stay tuned for that!

Unpopular opinion: I'm so sorry but I'm about to be a hater But the fact that Takeru haters even exist is really fascinating to me since most of his other counterparts are rather beloved Like he's got more fans that haters for sure, but I've seen every single one who has a think piece say "Takeru's only there to show off the card game" as if Salamangreat wasn't released in the OCG until July while Takeru has been showing off the deck since May, but I digress Yusaku's entire arc was finished in season 1, he got all of his answers, protected Ai to the very end, and was ready to move on. Yusaku just being a fix-it man for an entire second season? Would be BORING. So they needed a second voice to duo-lead, a new one with new motivations who hasn't already been shown, but could be tied back in a meaningful way. And what characters were left we knew very little about? The Ignis. What was unveiled in Season 1 about the Ignis? They're tied to six children, and we've now seen 2 of them. Also it's? Yugioh? Do you expect them NOT to show off cards and real strategies so you go spend your real life money on product? Remember Yuri randomly using an Ancient Gear deck in Arc V when the structure was starting to come out? Or most of duelist of the week duelists from GX? The animes are nothing but product placement and rule explanations (nit picking hating, but takeru's also written strangely sometimes, it's rare but some will make him way dumber or submissive than he is)

Favorite relationship: I'm a degenerate and beyond predictable And I've mentioned that I love Firestorm already, but if we're being very honest for a second, I always see it as one-sided with how Yusaku's written with Takeru,,, Like sometimes we overcome that gap and look at the potential because oh my god giving Yusaku someone like Takeru was SUCH a good idea, but I usually see it as a one-sided pining, but a VERY close friendship Yusaku in my head ALWAYS goes to Takeru's village post canon to apologize for leaving BUT I'm a degenerate, as I said about So to say I love Takeru and Ryoken's dynamic, from start to finish, is an understatement I love that they draw out the best of each other and push each other beyond their preexisting limitations as well as the shackles of their pasts I love that Ryoken respected Takeru's feelings so much that he didn't want to insult him by outright refusing the first challenge, but couldn't bring himself to duel knowing it wouldn't resolve anything I love how Soulburner accuses Revolver of not following up on that in Duel Links I fucking love "I'm so glad I met you", above all else I love finally seeing a conclusion to one of the many side rivalries, and I had a renewed appreciation for it after finishing Zexal and realizing what could have been there I also actually like how the dub handled their farewell scene, the promise of future challenges, Revolver promising to be there when they need him, the fond little chuckle

Favorite headcanon (more drug cw on this one!!) It's a weird one and it's kinda personal I guess, but I always write Takeru as sober gkdsa As a punk, I can imagine him dipping into more unsavory behaviors as a way to cope and express when he's struggling to find the next step, so when he decides to start fresh and live a new life, he cuts terrible habits like those cold turkey

#character buttons were pushed #asks #answered