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galedekarios · 4 months

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that interview is driving me insane i've been thinking about it for the past hour and i still can't wrap my head around it. i think what really gets under my skin is it just... contradicts with the text of the game. the most positive possible reading of the ending where gale blows himself up is that it was an unavoidable tragedy dictated by fate but even that's a stretch. to say it's a good ending?? or a satisfying conclusion to his arc?? i call bull. it's more infuriating because there is such a clear good ending for gale's character arc and it's the professor ending! his arc was about learning to accept himself as he was, to value who he is as he is flaws and all, and he's done that in the professor ending! and the god of ambition ending is a bad end for him but still ties into his overall arc in a satisfying if sad way (imo). the ending where he dies just... doesn't. which is fine as a tragedy but to imply it isn't exactly that, a tragedy, is wild to me. and it being so blatantly contradictory to the actual events of the game makes me think that whole thing was just catering to people who hate gale which like... why? people who don't like him don't care about his story so why pander to them like this?

uhg. i am sorry for blowing up your inbox like this i just feel like i'm gonna rip my hair out and need to express that to a fellow gale appreciator. i love gale's epilogue SO MUCH it made me feel for a bit like maybe the writers had actually changed how they felt about him but. nope! silly of me to hope for that. wish i could memory wipe that whole interview from my brain dark urge style.

don't be sorry at all! 🖤 i feel the same way in a lot of ways. altho i feel the need to mention that gale's writer, jan van dosselaer, was not involved in this interview.

i started to make a meta post about this yesterday, but reading things like this from gale:

act ii [after elminster] Player: An old man with a craving for cheese. Hardly the great wizard of legend. Gale: A wizard doesn't reach Elminster's age without enjoying their home comforts. Those who seek danger over cheese don't tend to live as long. Gale: For Mystra to have sent him... The severity of her bidding could not be clearer. Or weigh more heavily on me. devnote: reflecting on mystra sending elminster, of all people - a powerful individual, becoming reflective. Gale: Time seems so infinite when you are young... a month is an age, a year is a lifetime... it is a strange feeling, to realise how little of it one might have left. Player: You're seriously considering doing what Elminster said? Gale: Of course - he offered the clearest solution to our problem. All I have to do is find the right place and time, close my eyes, and let go... devnote: Trying to sound upbeat, not fully engaging with what he's saying (that he's going to kill himself). Gale: Then the slate will be clean, wrongs will be righted, the Absolute will be gone... devnote: Trying to sound upbeat, not fully engaging with what he's saying (that he's going to kill himself). Gale: ...and I along with it. devnote: Still trying to sound upbeat, though this time the reality that this means he will die weighs a bit heavier

and:

act ii [act ii romance scene] Gale: I am terrified - I will not claim otherwise. My face could scarcely conceal it even if my words sought to deny it. nodecontext: Hushed, vulnerable Gale: There is no point in running from the inevitable. Better to meet it, on my own terms. nodecontext: Resigned

as well as this:

act ii [act ii friendship version] Gale: Yes... but there is so much to live for, and so few moments in which to house it all. Gale: Damn you. Damn you for giving me so much to care about. Our friends, our adventures... this would have been so much easier if it was just me. But it isn't. Gale: If there is a way - any way - to save all that's grown dear to me, I want to seize it. I just cannot fathom what that might be, other than to fail Mystra and condemn the world. Gale: Stay with me, will you? I don't want to think of it any more, but I don't want to be alone either.

act iii [before the netherbrain] Player: Gale... I think we should consider using the orb as Mystra intended. To blow up the Netherbrain. Gale: I'm getting rather tired of how often those I care about seem to reach the same conclusion.

when you have this:

and i just... couldn't finish the meta.

it's absolutely beyond comprehension for me how anyone could try to frame this as an ending that is the right one in "many ways", as the "guy who starts off annoying everyone", eating your "most priced possessions", having to "give back to the world".

for the founder of the company to say he wasn't "ready" the "first time", but he's finally "ready" now.

gale's death isn't only unnecessary, an instruction given to him by his former mentor on the behalf of a goddess, who would've sacrificed not only him but thousands of others to achieve her own goals, he doesn't want to die. he's terrified. he wants to live. he is offering this because he believes that his time has run out. because he wants his death to have purpose if it must happen. because he feels he made a mistake far bigger than he can ever make up for. because he doesn't want others to waste their chance at life like he feels he has. the will he leaves behind in the epilogue if he sacrifices himself isn't finished because he thought there would be more time. i could go on and on.

and again, the question is too... for what exactly does he need to "give back to the world"?

being perceived as annoying after coming out of what is presented as isolation and depression? asking for help with a now chronic impairment that feeds on his very soul and wreaks havoc on his body? for making a mistake? by that logic every companion deserves the same fate.

which brings me to the contrast to how most of the other companions are framed in this interview: k*rlach, "the labrador of the party". l*e'zel, "she's so young". ast*rion, "much of what he does it out of fear". sh*dowheart, "the jason bourne" and "victim of religous trauma". w*ll, "the true baldur's gate hero".

the difference is staggering. there's empathy here. there's at least a surface level understanding and/or appreciation of the characters there.

...and then you have gale.

it's alienating and disappointing to see devs have so little respect and care for their own character, as well as for the parts of their fandom who have grown attached to the character exactly for the strengths and flaws he has, for the struggles he faces and for the healing journey he can have if he is helped and lives.

#my opinion on larian has already changed to the negative for the way they've lied prior release re: what is actually in the game #as well as the amount of bugs and issues that other companies would be dragged through the mud for #as well as the extreme bias showing itself in the scene disparity of their characters #but this was really the final nail in the coffin for me #i also think that it would have been so easy to find a more diplomatic answer instead of choosing reddit talking points but that's just me #ch: gale dekarios #vg: baldur's gate 3 #series: baldur's gate #text: personal #text: asks #bg3 critical #larian critical #suicidal ideation cw #depression cw

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sir-elyan · 6 months

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genuinely some of the best things you can do if you are depressed/have anxiety/are neurodivergent:

buy some plants (I do not mean succulents)

get a pet

you will have to get out of your dark depressing bedroom because you have to water those living things in your living room. caring for something can help you care for yourself. also, play them some music they like that

#depression tw #depression cw #hiii i was gonna nap and be sad but im gonna put some pants on and water my plants and make sure theyre all alive still

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the-worm-machine · 12 days

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hey i'm in a bit of a bad place right now, if you see this and i matter to you at all could you maybe reply telling me you don't hate me? but of course you don't have to because i totally understand why you would hate me. sorry for bothering you.

#depression cw #probably

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xluciifer · 1 month

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Why do you focus heavy on Lucifer's depression?

The answer is simple.

Because it's a key core element to his character. You can't just have him as the silly, comic relief guy who's Sad™ and tries to be a Good Dad™.

Depression bears its ugly teeth like glass fragments on the floor from a shattered mirror. It's easier to tell yourself you're not than to accept the fact that you are. Lucifer is a hypocrite. He's far from innocent and kind. He's fully embodied the devil side to himself, long forgetting what he once was as an angel. You get too saturated into the part you play and gaslight yourself into thinking it's the reality. He believes it. This is who he is and always has been.

But isn't that how a devil should be? Handsome, a gentleman, a facade of kindness? Lures you in to EAT YOU UP?

The lines begin to blur of who you are and who you once were; depression is a heavy burden to bear if you have to carry the load by yourself with a non-existent support system. And maybe through the Sins, he could've had one. But depression speaks of cruelty in the ears of the believer. The people who you love and care about: don't care about you. So why should you care too?

Does this mean it's factual? No. But it isolates you; creating a false narrative that you start to believe. Lucifer hates himself, hates the person he's become and he doesn't know what to do about it or how to change it. He was never shown, never taught. Only expected. So he submits, copes, wears the very mask he resents sinners wearing.

And though his hate for himself rings strong, he'll always see himself better and above those who actually deserve to be in Hell.

Once he opens up, once he allows people into the cage he's locked himself inside and allow his facade to shatter, will he finally take the steps in the right direction to finding himself again.

#headcanon.#depression cw #sinner questions.#ooc ; out of heaven

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fran-in-the-deep · 7 months

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Hello. How are you?

I am glad you're taking up requests and I would like to make one. 🤗

If you have time, I would like to request a LEVI x Fem!Reader with Hurt/Comfort fic.

Thank you in advance and have a great day! 🍻

A/N: Thank you for the request and sorry it took so long - but here we are again. I decided for a Modern AU for this one, if you had something else in mind, feel free to let me know! Feels good to get back into writing again.

Levi x Fem!Reader | Hurt/Comfort | Modern AU | ~800 words

CW for mental health struggles, depression

Push off the blanket. Sit up. Breathe. Feet off the couch. Stand up. Wait a second for the blood circulation to regulate, for the dizziness to fade. Take your tea cup off the table. It’s not empty, a disgusting cold sludge left over from yesterday clinging to the bottom of the cup. Ignore it. Navigate across the room to the kitchen unit. Don’t cry. Set down the cup in the sink. Turn on the tap. Set it to warm. Pour the leftover liquid down the drain. Don’t cry. Take the dish washing liquid. Pour it into the cup. Check the water temperature. Don’t cry. Put the cup under the stream. Watch the foam build up. Watch the cup overflow. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Take the sponge. Pick up the cup by the handle. Clean the inside of the cup. The water is getting too hot. Don’t cry. Put the sponge aside. Wipe away the tears in your eyes with your sleeve. Don’t cry. Rinse the cup. Don’t cry. Put the cup aside. Don’t cry. Turn off the tap. Don’t cry. Don’t.

The tap is dripping and you reach out to shut it off properly. Otherwise the sound of the drops hitting the metal texture of the sink ever two seconds might drive you insane. It takes you some time to notice that it’s not the water but your tears. So you’re crying again, it seems. You feel pathetic. A moment later there is a click in the door lock, you hear the key being turned around and then the door opens.

“I’m back.” Levis voice is quiet, as if trying to not disturb you. You hear the rustling of the grocery bags as he steps inside, looking around until he spots you. His expression changes, though you can’t tell what exactly it was.

“Hey, sorry.” What are you even apologizing for at this point? It was too late either way. Yet Levi just comes over, not even taking off his shoes or jacket. He sets down the two bags of groceries on the kitchen table, not breaking eye contact.

“You look like you need a hug.” He stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Maybe it is, you aren’t exactly subtle. Not ever, no matter how hard you tried. You always expected he would be put off by it, yet here you are. Day two of him insisting for you to stay at his place until you feel better.

“Yeah, I think I do.” You don’t know whether you even could get better. Yet Levi hugs you as if you were the most precious person in the world. His arms wrapped around you, one hand at the back of your head, gently pulling you down to rest your head on his shoulder. You can feel his steady heartbeat, his chest rising and falling with every breath. He is so unbelievably warm.

“It’s alright.” A whispered reassurance from him. And even if just for this moment, you believe him. You keep holding onto him, but your grip becomes less desperate as you realize that he won’t let you go. He won’t leave you.

It was something he told you over and over again with every word and every little gesture. Every invitation to come over and spend time, every cup of tea you had together, the late night phone calls, the meals you shared. When Levi held you like this, maybe you weren’t such a bad person after all. Maybe you were worthy to be loved, after all.

“We’ll have some nice dinner together, sit on the couch, watch a stupid movie, okay?” Levi draws circles your back in an attempt to soothe you. You manage a weak nod against his shoulder and feel him pull you even closer. He won’t let go, won’t leave you. You let yourself relax against him and he keeps you steady. When he pulls away to press a gentle kiss to the top of your head, you hum quietly.

“I’m glad you’re here.” He tells you as if he hadn’t spend the last days moving heaven and earth to accommodate you, to make sure you were okay and felt safe. As if it wasn’t ton of work for him but the most self evident thing in the world to care for you to this extend.

But he does, he does care such an awful lot for you, the same way you care about him. Finally accepting this makes you feel so at ease you don’t even feel like crying anymore. You feel his fingers brush through your hair, gently massaging the back of your head, your face nuzzled closer into the crook of his neck.

“You’ll be okay, I promise.”

#levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #hurt/comfort #cw depression #depression cw #fran-fiction writings #levi x you

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emkini · 3 months

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This February I want to appreciate the fact that this time last year I was so depressed I wasn't functioning, would have episodes of uncontrollable self-harm, and at a point was one phone call away from emergency hospitalization. I had a small anxiety attack today and it shook me up, but I remember how it was to feel this but so much worse, all the time. I think the fact that I've been doing well enough that a little anxiety rattles me might be a good thing, actually, and I'm thankful to everyone in my life who stepped up to help me when I needed it most and who continue to support me now.

#nevermind em #just thinking some thoughts this evening #depression cw #anxiety cw #self-harm cw

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meeks-just-wants-to-scroll · 4 months

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Line-up ref sheet for the cast! I’ll provide a summary of each character. Under the cut is the lore for the game, Epicenter.

Mitch: mid 20’s - he/him trans man - demiromantic ace spec - Easy going but reclusive guy. He’s on the autism spectrum and doesn’t go out of his way to appease people or make friends. He’s a delight to be friends with, it just has to be Bonds of Proximity friends (the kind you form by going to school, working, or living with someone). He has bouts of paranoia and dissociation. This is why Bax targeted Mitch the hardest; Bax would just have to play some ultrasounds or infrasound’s from his speakers and Mitch’s brain will do the rest. Mitch isn’t a fan of being a leader, but if forced to he will. He starts mother henning and wearing himself to wits end, though… He doesn’t like himself for doing this, but he does hold grudges towards other people and REALLY struggles to be nice and approachable when that happens.

Tex (Texico): early 20’s - any pronouns agender - questioning sexuality - in college for sculpture and art ^.^ they’re a fun, albeit eccentric, person. With friends she is happy to yap about whatever with vigor. She is the biggest video game nerd out of the friend group and has a soft spot for weird old games (like Epicenter). Shooter games are her jam. She is a “run head first into the enemies” type of player. She thinks highly of her fighting skills. Tex is usually upbeat and a big support for keeping the group happy during tough situations. When she is down, though, SHE’S DOWN… it is really hard for her to find a reason to keep going when she is beaten down emotionally. (Keep going as in finish a project or talk to her friends or finish a video game. She is in therapy for depression).

Laís: early 20’s - she/her cis - unlabeled; has little interest in dating men - Ranges from silent and sad/grouchy to happily talking with her classmates and teacher (depends on how tired she is that day). She’s good in class, though she has a few late assignments hanging over her head because of work and family. She was friends with Mitch before meeting the others. Laís is the illusive friend who pops into voice calls every once in a while. She does her own thing and doesn’t budge her head into the established friend group because she knows Mitch and that’s about it. She worries she’s seen as an outsider who doesn’t belong in the friend group because she doesn’t have the same chemistry. Laís too is a video game fan, but more so because she likes learning about American video games. She’s the kind of person to sabotage and explode her friends in shooter games, all in good fun :-). She can be stubborn at times. She puts herself before others because it’s always been how she lived. Especially in the friend group, she thinks of herself as an outsider even when the friend group makes an effort to welcome her. She can be hard to work with sometimes because of her unwillingness to compromise.

Mill (Milly/Miller): early 20’s - she/he/they Demigirl - pansexual ace spec - quiet book worm 🐛. He helps the friend group with homework as long as they can bribe him with something in return (usually random things or trinkets. Never money). He doesn’t talk a lot, even in the friend group. He feels Mitch and Tex (and sometimes Laís when she hangs out) fill the air enough with chatting. Mill is the emotional anchor of the group, able to reel everyone in if they get too heated or sad or what-not. Not to say Mill is invincible emotionally; he can lose his cool if people don’t listen to his advice. He fears he couldn’t be a good leader; he’s just a background nobody who follows people. Mill Second to Tex, Mill has good knowledge of games from the 1990’s and 2000’s. Mill was the person who brought up Epicenter to his friends.

Bax (Baxter): was trapped in a video game for nearly 26 years… - any pronouns (but Bax is referred to as He/they/it by the other characters) - unlabeled sexuality - He is… something? The extent of his influence on technology is blurry. He has full control of stuff in the Epicenter game (like a player with god mode and cheats), but he is incapable of leaving said game. Bax is hard to pin point because he is conflicting at times. He can be antagonistic or lovey dovey, he can be all up in your business or cold and distant (even disappearing sometimes). His motives are unknown to the friend group. If it wasn’t for the amnesia and mixing of scripted code into the players, the cast would have likely rejected Bax. Luckily, Bax knew that if he wanted to follow the team, he’d have to implant fake memories. The cast (apart from Mitch) are warm or Luke-warm with Bax because of the fake memories.

I honestly asked ChatGPT to spit out a half-life inspired game and I pieced together my favorite parts. I’m not a gamer so I am heavily following the well-treaded path of Half-Life 1.

The game gist is that Epicenter is a single and multiplayer game. In single player, the 4 class choices (soldier, agent, scientist, security) offer 4 different POV of the same catastrophe.

In multiplayer, the game becomes a cooperative neutral path. Compared to single player, the multiplayer game is less individual character motivation driven and more so about getting all player to the end of the game. The game adapts so even if you have 2, 3, or 4 people, it’ll be balance and accessible (ex: if someone plays as scientists then there’ll be puzzles that require him unlocking lab doors, but if no one is playing scientists then these doors would be jammed open with debris since other classes can’t unlock top secret doors).

There are aliens, but it’s more so man-made bioweapon rather than Xen/other worldly aliens. They still look freaky and unworldly because I say so.

The single player game is class-driven and show different facets of the bigger story.

Soldier: Shows how the US military came in to kill the bio weapons but also reveal the US doesn’t care if innocent people must be murdered in the process. Sometimes they go out of their way to cover up by killing witnesses. It’s similar to HL Opposing force in that you play a military goon who gets caught up in shit going south. Your character starts defecting from the military when you start being commanded to kill innocent people (are they innocent? They sure cower and scream like they are…)

Gov Agent: a reconnaissance mission to see what went wrong; Let’s the player see the unethical tests and dubious goals of the government laboratories. What was the use of the bio weapons? Was America planning to declare a war and win asap with it? The secret agent was at the facility before the catastrophe. They were originally there to smile and talk with officials about the future of the organization.

Scientist: Closest copy to Gordon Freeman’s pov. scientist just needs to get out asap. It gives the pov of the innocent people caught up amongst this all and how hard they had to fight to escape. You’re also given clearance to most of the establishment so you get to see it all. Perhaps some plot about doubting if you’re actually an innocent worker? What have you as a scientist done to help with the government’s plan for war? Do you inadvertently have blood on your hands by helping America’s thirst for more efficient war? 🤔

Security: focus is on saving others, not yourself. Wiping out enemies and solving puzzles to get NPC from danger to safe zones is key. Scientists, guards, and medics are kept alive. The guard doesn’t have clearance to everything so they must use scientists they saved to unlock doors. As they delve deeper into the establishment, you start to be horrified by it all realizing how demented the goal of this establishment really is. The player is given the option to continue saving the workers, or start murdering them all like the bioweapon beasts they exterminated.

The thing setting scientist apart from guard is that the guard is disillusioned with the government fast and is easily convinced everything was black and white malicious. The scientist on the other hand bought into this all long enough to see the grey of it all. They consider the good they could do. The needless blood as man after man is sent into war to die… Wars could end faster with bio weapons. They make medicine too! So many diseases were cured because of this laboratory. Drugs strong enough to defeat even Superbugs were invented.

I’ll stop there. :p

It’s a bleak “ooohhh gov is maybe evil! War bad” generic story but it’s good enough to be a fictional game for this story. The game is supposed to be made in the 1990’s which is far from the peak Cold War scare, but imagine this game’s message about science and war was inspired by the lingering worry from the Cold War and such.

The classes —the character arc they’re coded to follow— influences how the friend group cope with being trapped in the game. 👍

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youneedsomeprompts · 1 year

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~ SHOWING SUPPORT FOR SOMEONE WITH DEPRESSION ~ WRITING PROMPTS

requested by: anonymous

Feel free to use and reblog!

offering hugs

helping them with simple life tasks without judging

bringing them food they like

"I'm here for you."

trying to give them as much comfort as they can

telling them stories from the outside world to distract them

accepting that not every attempt to help actually does something for the other

just sitting in silence with them & being there

"Do you want to talk?" "No." "It's alright."

wrapping them up in a blanket

reading to them

talking them into going out into the green for recreation

being patient

not having expectations but being happy about every sign of recovery

making sure that they're staying hydrated enough

"I made this for you."

showing them they're happy to see them even if the other isn't in a great state ("I love you regardless")

gentle gestures of affection (brushing through their hair, caressing, etc.)

giving them soft smiles

holding them when they need to cry

note: I'm not a professional, and this is not a list of perfect ways to help a depressed person but a list of ways people would maybe try to help. If you or someone you know really needs help, please seek professional help <3

#writing prompts #prompt list #prompts #whump prompts #offering support prompts #writing inspiration #writing ideas #writers on tumblr #writeblr #depression tw #depression cw #mental illness tw #mental illness cw #mental health struggles tw #mental health struggles cw #20 prompts

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byeler · 9 months

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wip wednesday for chapter two of i’ll find myself in the moonlight !

#i think i should like. tw this but idk what to tag it as?#depression cw #anxiety cw #uh lemme know if you know a better way to phrase this i’m not sure #anyway #byler fic #byler fanfic #miwip wednesday

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galedekarios · 4 months

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Re: your recent posts, I GUARANTEE if they'd said something similar about Astarion, that idk getting staked is the best ending for him, people would absolutely understand how that comment is hurtful to irl abuse victims, and be capable of realizing that that's where the anger is coming from and not people thinking he's real lol

of course. imagine:

ast*rion: 'the guy who tries to kill the player as soon as they meet' interviewer: i really liked handing ast*rion over to the gur hunter, and actually that felt like the right ending to me. lead writer 1: in many ways it is, yeah. interviewer: if you wait that long, it's a cool ending. founder of the company: it is. we talked about that a lot. we talked about everything a lot. there's very little that went into game, even down to the individual lines, that we didn't discuss. [...] and as you say, it fixes things very well. lead writer 2: on a very human level, you have the guy who tries to kill the player as soon as they meet and then, next rest, tries to assault them at camp. the guy who is very prejudiced against a minority, he's constantly trying to manipulate you into sleeping with him and giving him blood, otherwise he's in trouble, and at the end, he gives himself to the world for justice. founder of the company: and he had a choice already once before where he wasn't ready for it. so it's a very powerful ending and it comes in different permutations.

just changed the words pertaining to gale, the rest is the same as in the interview.

i think it says a lot when someone feels the need to move goalposts, misrepresent what was actually said both by the devs in this interview and by the people - the people who identify with gale for themes touched on in his narrative arc, be it depression, suicidal ideation, chronic illness, etc - offering valid criticism in response to said interview.

it's not wrong or out of touch to expect industry veterans to be more conscious of these themes within their own games and, just as importantly, in how they speak about them.

which again, they showed they are capable of in other instances of the same interview. just not with gale, for whom they've chosen to parrot reddit-level talking points.

disclaimer: this comparison is made to highlight the hypocrisy and double standard, not to shit on character xyz.

#ch: gale dekarios #vg: baldur's gate 3 #series: baldur's gate #text: asks #text: personal #bg3 critical #larian critical #depression cw #suicidal ideation cw #sa cw #abuse cw

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