if I send you “🙏🏻🏃♀️🛣🗻🏠” it means if I only could, I’d make a deal with God and I’d get him to swap our places. be running up that road, be running up that hill, be running up that building
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If I Only Could (Ivy Chronicles #5)
[x] [Full work available on AO3]
<< #1: "A7" I | << #2: The Bet | << #3: “A7” II | << #4: Butcher
#5: If Only I Could
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Chapters: 1/1
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Minho, Thomas, Newt
Summary: Thomas and Minho cope with Newt's loss at the Safe Haven.
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If I only could
Thomas heard the singing-humming as he entered the kitchen. It was Newt by the counter. His back turned to the door, he didn’t notice Thomas enter. Thomas didn’t make a sound; he wanted to appreciate this moment for a second longer before interrupting.
Mhmhm mhmhm deal with god
Newt kept humming when he didn’t know the lyrics anymore. He only did remember one verse, so the rest was all humming. But he remembered the melody, though, and it made for a beautiful piece of singing. And Thomas loved to hear it. Cooking was Newt’s favourite thing to do; and listening to him sing as he cooked was Thomas’s.
And I mhm mhm swap our places
At that moment Newt moved to grab something and he needed to move in a way that revealed his limping. Thomas was a bit caught by surprise. It was one of those situations when you realise what feels obvious, but it took you some realising either way. The sad story behind his limping was diametrically away from–but at the same time, in a way, completely twin with–the lyrics that he sang so tranquilly.
I’d be running up that road, be running up that hill
The sound of the voice which sang absently was accompanied only by the quick thuds of a knife’s blade against the wood of the table. Minho was almost with his back turned to the entrance to the tent. It could be possible for him to notice someone arriving, but he was too in an absent-minded focus, as he got, to see Thomas there. Minho developed an intense interest in cooking after they settled down at the Safe Haven.
Be running up that building
It gradually became more and more common for Thomas to enter the tent where they had the makeshift kitchen of the Haven and find Minho there, cooking, singing.
If only I could
Thomas always had to control himself not to go to Minho and touch him. He had to remember to announce himself, or he’d cause Minho to jump to the roof in a fright. Sometimes even just talking to announce himself made Minho jump a little. That’s how focused he got. Sometimes he’d quickly turn away from where Thomas stood and pretend to be very busy at the counter. Thomas learned to just leave him to his tears when that happened and pretend not to notice. Thomas thought it was the silliest thing in the world and would almost get mad at Minho for not allowing Thomas to help him, to be there for him and with him.
I’d make a deal with god. And get him to swap our places
But he learned that each person copes differently; and they need to do their thing. Minho was getting better at not suppressing his emotions, “Letting it flow,” just like Thomas himself and Newt had instructed him to do a million times back in the Glade.
Newt.
I’d be running up that road, be running up that hill.
But deep down Thomas understood Minho, and he felt the same, in a way. The will to hide the hurt. He sighed and, before he knew it, a tear was rolling down his cheek. The sigh made Minho look. Worry crossed his face when he noticed the moistness in Thomas’s face.
“What, what’s wrong?” He asked.
Thomas shook his head a little. “It’s nothing.”
If only I could
“You look just like him.”
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[x] #5: If Only I Could
<< #1: "A7" I | << #2: The Bet | << #3: “A7” II | << #4: Butcher
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