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kunikidas-lost-glasses · 7 months

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Nikolai saving Fyodor - Fyolai Drabble

HEAVY SPOILERS FOR BSD SEASON 5 AND ESPECIALLY FOR BSD SEASON 5 EPISODE 11 UNDERNEATH

Nikolai didn't gave Dazai and Fyodor poison in this. There was some other stuff in the injections but no poison. He just wanted to make the game more interesting and funky/entertaining.

Important to note: This drabble is connected to my BSD Fix-It AU with the only change being the circumstances under which Nikolai saved Fyodor and the reason why Dazai told Atsushi to write down that Fyodor would lose his ability.

It's not needed to necessarily read my other post in order to understand this post.

It's only important to know that the ADA managed to obtain the page and that Dazai told Atsushi to write on it that Fyodor would lose his ability. He knew about the consequences it would have and while he hoped that Fyodor was gone for good, he wanted to make sure that if he would really somehow manage to come back, he wouldn't try to start a war again, not trusting him at all.

This AU works with the theory that Fyodor is highly influenced by his ability.

TWs (PLEASE take them seriously): Mentions and descriptions of blood (a lot of blood), descriptions of injuries, panic, crying (a lot of crying), medical procedures, descriptions of being in pain, mentions of fever, mentions of getting sick, mentions of the medical procedure of stitching up/suturing wounds, descriptions of treating wounds, descriptions of struggling with loosing the ability to use one hand, descriptions/mentions of utterly neglecting oneself, slightly implied depersonalization/derealization, slight mention of feeling numb, mentions of death, mentions of being heavily influenced by something, short slight mention of one of Nikolai's graphic crimes (they were mentioned when the ADA took his case), mention of scars

Maybe a bit ooc. (I understand the characters I swear. I just enjoy writing stuff which is a tiny bit ooc to allow more fluff to happen. However I tried to make it not extremely ooc though.)

(I did bend the rules of legitimacy/reality a bit in regard to treating the injuries in order to make this possible as well as a bit more easier to write.)

It's all hurt/comfort tho and it does have a lot of fluff towards the end. I promise.

Word count: 6341 words in total

He didn't know what came over him but before the helicopter crashed into the tower of the prison, Nikolai used his ability to drag Fyodor into one of his portals.

Dazai and Chuuya didn't notice him using his ability.

As soon as Chuuya and Dazai left, entering the prison one more time in order to get Sigma out of there, hoping that he would be still alive, Nikolai hectically opened up a portal himself and used it to rush into one of his many hideouts in which he had teleported Fyodor

Nikolai had never felt so glad about all the different little hideouts he had everywhere where Fyodor would be in case he needed him for a plan.

Searching a hotel room where he could try to save the Russian would become quite difficult and bringing him to a hospital while both of them were wanted criminals (one of them on the run and one of them officially pronounced dead to the public) wasn't something he could do.

Nikolai wasn't thinking clearly anymore when he arrived in the shabby little house which he called his hideout and which he had purchased under one of his many many fake identities.

In fact, he wasn't really thinking at all anymore. At least not what he would normally think.

He always expected that if he would ever see Fyodor dying, he would be filled with a sense of relief, a happy and freeing feeling, knowing that he finally reached his goal and became free.

However now this wasn't the case at all.

The only things he felt were panic and some kind of denial.

He couldn't believe what had just happened. In one minute he was chatting with Fyodor who was sitting well and alive in the helicopter, his mind already filled with excitement, imaging their upcoming new game which would have something just between them and the next minute Fyodor had been stabbed in the stomach with a metal bar which was pinning him in place, his white prison suit was covered in red, thoroughly soaked with his own blood while his body was shaking and his voice was filled with pain.

Never once had Nikolai seen Fyodor in this much pain, never once had he seen the emotions of his dear friend written so clearly and openly all over his face and not once had he himself felt so awful before. Not once has he felt such fear while his own life wasn't in danger at all.

He had felt utter sadness and heartbreak before, yes. But not such a nearly hysterical panic.

It was deep, painful sadness which ran through his veins, squeezing his heart together when he had noticed that the eyes of his childhood friend with whom he had lived together on the streets and with whom he fell in love became more hazy, losing all the light in it and when his tiredness and mature character which came from all the trauma he already had to go through since a young age slowly turned into a harsh cold personality.

Nikolai could do nothing when Fyodor's ability started to take over his friend more and more as they grew older, influencing his mind and with that his personality as well as his actions thoroughly, seemingly merging Fyodor Crime and Punishment until Fyodor slowly became a part of his ability himself. Cold, cruel and harsh.

He could only watch as Fyodor started to act and when Punishment would take over completely for short periods of time. He was unable to do anything, knowing that the ability itself was just as intelligent as the one who wielded it.

Still, he knew exactly when Fyodor, even though his mind was still heavily influenced, was coming through more and still he knew exactly that the goal was to get rid of all ability users and with that all abilities came from his Fyodor.

Surprisingly, he couldn't bring himself to love Fyodor any less, despite his more cold and cruel personality.

The sadness however, still ran deep.

But he had never felt any panic and fear like this. Not when his own life wasn't in danger.

He had expected that the moment he would see Fyodor dying would bring him joy but the expected joy was a feeling of panic and denial which clouded all his mind and made it hard to think straight and instead of feeling a sense of victory upon seeing Fyodor's face twisted in pain, he felt sick to the stomach when he saw him spitting out a concerning amount of blood, feeling like vomiting himself.

If he could think straight, he would have possibly wondered why his mind wasn't acting up, refusing to try to treat his friend in order to reach his goal but now, he only could think about saving his friend, hoping that it wasn't too late.

He rushed into the bedroom in which he had placed Fyodor on the little bed, nearly tripping twice on his way due to running so fastly through the hallways.

Upon finally reaching the bedroom, seeing his friend, he felt his heart sink.

By now, Fyodor had fully passed out, his body lying limp on the bed. His face was covered in cold sweat, his hair sticking to his forehead and the now visible large stab wound was bleeding like crazy.

If Nikolai wouldn't have been used to seeing very disturbing things, he would have probably vomited but even now he still felt incredibly sick, not due to the injury but from seeing his dear friend like this.

For a short moment, he stood next to the bed like frozen before quickly bending down to check if Fyodor was still breathing and if he still had a pulse.

He knew that the chances were slim and he nearly didn't dare to check but he had to.

Upon feeling a faint pulse and upon feeling Fyodor breathing even though it were small and uneven breaths which he took, he felt like a giant weight got lifted off his heart, which felt like it was close to shattering in thousands of pieces, breaking beyond repair anyways.

However, he still couldn't feel real relief until he knew that Fyodor was in a stable shape again.

He knew that he had a lot to do now, knowing that he was still alive but he had barely any time due to Fyodor bleeding out at a rapid speed from his stab wound but also from his injured hand and the wound where Sigma had shot him.

Trying to frantically stop the bleeding through applying pressure to the wound, Nikolai remembered the trick he did with Sigma when the latter was bleeding out from where he was shot.

Sigma's injury had been way smaller, he had lost much less blood and he wasn't in such a bad shape as Fyodor at all but he knew that doing this trick once again, would at least give him some more time.

Carefully, he pushed Fyodor into his portal before looping him through the two portals which he had opened up, slowly letting some blood flow back into his body.

This time, he was much more careful than he was with Sigma and it didn't bring him any kind of entertainment at all.

He also reduced the distance between the two portals to being as small as possible, not wanting to let Fyodor fall through the air longer than needed.

After being sure that Fyodor had more blood in his body again, he quickly lifted him back on the bed, using his ability once more to grab the box in which he stored all his medical supplies from the bathroom, not wanting to waste any time and not wanting to leave Fyodor's side.

As soon as he held the box in his hands, he placed it on the bed, opening it with shaky hands and grabbing one of scissors inside of it in order to cut open the prisoner suit in order to treat Fyodor.

After cutting the remaining parts of the upper half of the jumpsuit open, he grabbed a cloth from the bathroom with his ability, pressing it onto the wound, trying to stop the bleeding while trying not to worry about the fact that Fyodor didn't even flinched or made any pained noise upon Nikolai putting pressure on the large wound on his stomach.

Nikolai himself was only taking short hitched breaths anymore as he watched how the previously brightly colored cloth slowly got soaked in the blood of his dearest friend, turning more and more red with every passing second.

After some time, of trying to slow down the bleeding and after using the portal loop a couple of times more to give him more time, he finally had the bleeding a bit under control which meant that he now came to the part he feared the most.

Nikolai had treated many wounds before.

He had been the one to clean and stitch up Sigma's wound while they were in a hotel on the way to the prison.

He didn't really feel scared that day. He knew that he had already treated and stitched wounds of his own already so why shouldn't it work with Sigma's wound.

Sigma himself wasn't really scared either. He had been lying on the bed, looking like all the life had been sucked out of him, the realization that his casino was really gone and that all the people in it were dead had crashed down on him, shortly after their little conversation after he had woken up again after falling from the Sky Casino.

If anything, Nikolai had been more scared of Sigma's clearly upcoming breakdown which was brooding inside of him, even if he was still feeling numb at the moment.

Nikolai also hadn't been scared when he had treated his own wounds, stitching them up himself.

He had done it multiple times as a child living on the streets in the Ukraine until Fyodor joined him, insisting to treat Nikolai's wounds.

Hell, he had even skinned a person before and didn't feel scared. Numb yes. Like he was watching it happen in a movie theater, yes. But not scared.

However now his hands wouldn't stop shaking and his breathing became even more quicker and hitched but he knew that it was the only way to save Fyodor.

Noone else besides him would treat his wounds. They had nowhere else to go.

He hectically grabbed the little chair which was standing in the room, pulling it next to the bed, sitting down on it, removing his now bloody gloves, putting on some medical gloves which had been in the box as well, placing everything he needed to start treating the wound properly on a new cloth on the bed, taking a needle into his hand.

Taking a deep breath, he told himself quietly that he had to pull himself together now and that he had done this many times before but that his hands had to stop shaking now or else he would mess it up.

It was one of the few times Nikolai genuinely prayed.

Nikolai didn't know how long he treated Fyodor's wounds and his hand but it felt like hours.

He made use of all the medical knowledge he had from books and from Fyodor himself as well.

He had asked his friend a couple of times before about random medical stuff, simply because he wanted his friend's attention and because he had wanted to talk with him and he had never been so glad about the fact that he asked him about it and listened to him before.

After he finally dressed the wounds, putting multiple layers on them before wrapping them all up in clean white bandages as well as after wrapping the hand up, he felt all the energy which mainly came from his panic as well as from his sheer willpower and his wish to save his friends life fade out of his body, his body practically slumping together on the chair as he still somewhat propped himself up, elbows on the bed and his head leaning against his hands.

The silence around him felt both defening and calming as he only now realized how quiet it was.

Only his own and Fyodor's hitched breathing were the only noises in the room.

While taking a couple deep breaths, he realized that he really did it, that Fyodor's life was (for now) pretty much saved but also realized what he just did, that he saved him instead of killing him, realizing that Sigma was right when he once told him that Nikolai was unable to kill Fyodor, that he needed him and was still attached to him too much to kill him off and that he still loved him more than anything but also, upon him finally coming out of his panicked state, tears started to form in Nikolai's eyes and he was by no means able to stop them from falling down his cheeks.

He was too tired and felt too much to even think about stopping them and like that, Nikolai sat next to the bed on which Fyodor who now looked like was sleeping if one ignored the sweat on his face, the hitched breathing and the thick bandages, was lying, crying more than he ever cried before.

He cried for more than an hour, his mind a mess and everything from the past weeks crashing down on him.

Eventually he didn't even knew if he cried because of the relief after saving Fyodor or because he was so mad at himself or maybe because he realized how deeply wrong he was or maybe because he felt so torn apart but he still wouldn't stop crying. The tears continued falling down his face and he felt like he would never stop crying.

Eventually he did though.

After the crying finally quieted down, he felt more worn-out and even more like all his energy and life got sucked out of him.

Everything hurted, he had a pounding headache and light hurted in his now swollen red eyes while his face felt like it was about to explode in general.

Slowly sitting up again, slumping against the backlean of the creaking chair, he let his gaze wander over Fyodor and the bed.

There was blood everywhere on the bed and on his medical supplies, the room was a mess, used cloths, cotton balls and tissues were lying around everywhere, his own purple now reddish stained gloves were lying next to the bed and Fyodor somehow still looked breathtakingly beautiful.

Nikolai just hoped that Fyodor would handle it well, especially because of his anemia or else he would have to steal some blood transfusions from the nearest hospital.

It would be no problem. He knew how to do it, he knew Fyodor's blood type for whatever reason he couldn't recall anymore by now and after what he had just done, a blood transfusion was nothing compared to it but he knew all the risks which came with one and it was really something which he had never done before unlike treating a wound (even though he has never treated such a large and drastical wound before and even though he had usually never saved lives before) so it was really something he only wanted to do if there was no other way anymore.

Besides this he wanted to draw as less police attention to his surroundings as possible so he wanted to refrain from committing any crime but if he had to do it for Fyodor he would do it without having to think about it twice.

He looked with tired and nearly empty eyes at the scene before him for quite some time before he scratched together all the willpower and energy he had left in his body to drag himself out of his chair in order to clean up a bit.

He cleaned the room and the bed a bit up, carefully cleansed all his medical supplies if he would need them again in case of an emergency and washed his hands which were stained with blood from when he tried to stop the bleeding earlier.

Afterwards, he fully got Fyodor out of his prison clothes and dressed him into some lose pyjama pants of his own.

They were way too big and way too long for him but he didn't wanted to let him lie there in either a torn apart bloody prison jumpsuit or just in his underwear.

He also put him some of his warmest socks on, not wanting to let the other freeze before placing multiple blankets on top of him.

He didn't wanted to put on a shirt on him since he needed to frequently change his bandages and also in case he quickly had to do something on the wound again but he also didn't wanted to let Fyodor freeze or get sick on top of all so he gathered all the blankets he had lying around or which he had stored in his portals, placing them on top of Fyodor.

He also put his hand on a spare pillow so that it would lay a bit higher, knowing that it would help for a better blood flow but also reducing the risk of Fyodor accidentally touching it in case he would start to move. And Nikolai wanted so badly that he would start moving soon.

Seeing Fyodor's body lie there so limp, made his heart sink each and every time he looked at him again.

His hand was beyond fixing. Nikolai did his best but it was so injured that he probably only could move it and the fingers a little bit.

It still worked but he most likely could never use it as much as before.

After everything was done, Nikolai sat on his chair next to Fyodor for the next days, holding his injured hand gently, looking at him, monitoring his breathing, checking his overall shape and looking out for him him general without a break.

Only when he felt close to passing out he would force himself to get up to drink something and to nibble on a slice of bread or whatever random "snack" he would find but he couldn't really eat anything. He didn't want to eat anything.

The only thing he wanted was Fyodor to wake up. To look at him again with those hypnotizing purple eyes of his in which he could get lost ever since they met and to speak to him again.

He would even be fine with Fyodor telling him that he would kill him. He just wanted him to wake up and to hear his soothing deep voice with the heavy Russian accent which he loved so much.

Just like when he cleaned the room and dressed Fyodor, watching over him he felt like in some kind of trance. Everything just passed by. He was caught up in his thoughts, thinking about Fyodor, about Punishment, about what happened, about his childhood, about their shared childhood, about his ideology, about freedom and his love.

He never noticed when he fell asleep. Sleeping and being awake kind of blurred together.

Often he would dream about Fyodor and about them as children on the streets. How he once took care of Fyodor in another cold and cruel winter when he got sick, shoplifting medicine and holding the shivering Fyodor in his arms as he sat on the ground the empty side alley in which they always slept, his panic rising the higher Fyodor's fever got and about how he wrapped his own coat about Fyodor in a desperate attempt to keep him warm and shield him from the cold which surrounded them even if that meant that he would freeze himself. As long as he could help Fyodor he was happy.

He dreamt about how he prayed while Fyodor's fever was the highest it had ever been and he dreamt about how he cried in happiness when Fyodor started to eat, talk and walk around again, finally feeling better.

He dreamt about them dancing around. He dreamt about the prison about the helicopter he dreamed over and over about Fyodor's pained expression but he also dreamed about how they would sometimes lie together in the bed of Fyodor's apartment at night, holding each other after Nikolai came over to Fyodor's place once again after having a nightmare, Nikolai listening to Fyodor's steady heartbeat, neither of them saying a word, only hugging each other, knowing that there will never happen more between them than this. A faint reminder of how close they once were as teens trying to survive.

He dreamt of purple eyes, cold but gentle and soft bony hands, black hair and the sound of a feather quill scratching over paper as well as flickering screens with the purple symbol of the rats.

He dreamt about birds and freedom.

The days would pass like this, Nikolai never leaving Fyodor's side for longer than a couple of minutes until one day after nearly a whole week, Fyodor's body tensed up, his face twisting in pain for a second, his breathing becoming quicker before he managed to open his eyes a bit, blinking a couple of times before his eyes fully focused on his surroundings.

Nikolai stared at him with wide eyes, not really daring to believe that what he was seeing was real and not a dream.

Upon gaining more and more consciousness, Fyodor sucked in a sharp breath due to all the pain he felt but his mind was still too clouded to really register where the pain was coming from.

He didn't recognize his surroundings so he moved his head a bit to look around but seeing who was sitting next to him wasn't something he would have expected at all.

Upon seeing Nikolai sitting next to him, staring at him with wide eyes, a mixture of happiness, relief and disbelief written all over his face, Fyodor's own eyes widenth.

He was the first one to break the silence between them, Nikolai seemingly not daring to do anything, still not really believing what was happening.

It took him a lot of energy but he managed to say Nikolai's name, his voice being awfully hoarse and sounding fragile and weak.

As soon as Nikolai heard Fyodor call out his name, he left his frozen state and tears welled up in his eyes.

Fyodor looked at him in shock upon seeing the other tear up, still not really being able to fully wrap his head around what happened and that he was alive but despite his mind being all messy, he tried to squeeze the other's hand out of reflex, only to realize that he couldn't really move his hand before a piecing pain shot through his body making him flinch hard, causing another wave of pain to roll through his whole body this time and not only through his arm.

After the pain got a bit less again, he finally realized that his stomach and his shoulder were covered in thick heavy bandages which were neatly wrapped around him as well that wasn't wearing any prison clothes anymore.

The memories of what happened before he passed out came back as well and while he had been so sure that that was it, he was now lying here and since he could tell that this wasn't any official hospital or an infirmary at the prison he knew exactly who brought him here and who saved him.

Upon realizing all of this, he looked at all the blankets covering him before looking back at Nikolai with such a soft yet pained gaze.

It was then when he saw how awful Nikolai looked. He had lost a lot of weight, there were deep dark shadows under his eyes, he still wore his clown costume, just the hat, the card covering his eye and his gloves were missing but it looked messy and there were blood stains all over it. However since Nikolai didn't seemed to be injuried at all, Fyodor could tell that it was all his own blood which was still all over Nikolai's clothes, showing him that he hadn't even changed after cleaning up, hurrying next to his side again to stay with him.

His white hair was a mess as well and looked like it hasn't been combed since days. Even his braid which was usually done all neatly and accurate was a mess, strands of hair being out of the braid here and there and the bow at the end of the braid seemingly trying it's best to hold the last remains of the once braided hair together.

Nikolai was pale and looked more worn-out and tired than Fyodor had ever seen him and to his surprise, he felt his heart sink upon seeing his friend like this.

He wanted to say something, asking Nikolai what he had done but before he could say anything, Nikolai cried out that he hated him, tears starting to fall down.

Fyodor was caught off guard at first before a soft smile spread across his lips and he managed to say "Thank you Koyla" before he tensed up again, another wave of pain making his body feel like it was getting stabbed in the stomach all over again.

Nikolai stared at him in disbelief before gently lifting Fyodor's bandaged hand to his own face, cradling it and holding it softly against his cheek, looking at Fyodor with a wobbly smile before breaking down crying once again, not letting go of Fyodor's hand.

Fyodor just looked at Nikolai and for once he did let himself feel how painfully in love he himself was with Nikolai.

Normally he tried to suppress it, denying himself any kind of love he felt towards the other but now he couldn't bring himself to even just try to do so.

He was glad that he woke up to Nikolai sitting next to.

He couldn't say anything to Nikolai as the latter cried, since the few things he said already took out all his energy so he just lied there, looking at the other with a small smile.

Eventually Nikolai pulled himself together again, carefully laying down Fyodor's hand on the pillow again, however not letting go of it before asking him a couple of things about how he was feeling which Fyodor answered with either nodding his head or shaking his head.

In the following days, Nikolai would continue to take care of Fyodor, gently propping him up against the headboard of the bed, feeding him soup and other more nurturing dishes he would cook for him as well as making him drink a lot of water and tea.

He also made him regularly take iron supplements and fed him sweets every now and then to help his body to recover from the blood loss.

They didn't talk much. Fyodor couldn't talk much anyways but it was off-putting to see Nikolai so quiet and drowned in thoughts.

Fyodor knew that he had to leave him alone with his thoughts now and that he himself had to sort this battle between his humanity and his ideology out for himself.

Nikolai would change his bandages and the covers of the blankets regularly and kept a close eye on the wounds.

The wound were Sigma shot Fyodor in his shoulder healed good and quickly but the wounds on his hand and especially the large stab wound were healing slowly but luckily, neither of them showed any signs of an infection.

Fyodor did his best to appear put together when Nikolai was changing the bandages but sometimes he couldn't prevent himself for making pained noises, flinching hard or tensing up, hashly sucking in the air.

Nikolai never made any comments on it but he often looked at him with a worried and apologetic expression.

He hated feeling so weak and vulnerable and he was horrified of Punishment lashing out an Nikolai whenever he was in a lot of pain since it tended to lash out when Fyodor felt threatened or in pain so he was often lying there utterly exhausted after Nikolai exchanged the bandages, partly from the pain but mostly from trying to keep Punishment at bay in his weakened state.

He felt Punishment rage inside of him every single day and he found himself having the urge to get revenge on Dazai and Chuuya and the whole ADA.

However one day, just when his body was in a good enough shape for him to slowly start to get up again he felt the harsh feeling of Punishment inside of him as well as the influence it had on him disappear completely in just one moment.

It didn't fade away slowly, it was like someone had just flicked off a light switch and turned it off.

Suddenly he regained his whole consciousness again, his mind which always was a bit messy and foggy due to Punishment's influence suddenly feeling completely normal again.

He didn't really know what happened but the disappearing of his ability made unable to leave his bed even more again.

All the memories of what happened crashed down on him besides of parts where his ability had taken over completely, and the guilt was eating him up alive.

In addition to that, he had to fully readjust to having his full consciousness back.

Mostly however, he had to wrap his head around the fact that he was only Fyodor now. Not Crime, not Punishment, only Fyodor.

He felt the rage and the twisted thoughts disappear and it made him both utterly relieved and scared.

It was like a part of him got taken away but he didn't felt less whole now. If anything, he felt like himself again despite the guilt eating him up alive and it confused him more than anything.

Nikolai was there for him the whole time. He wouldn't leave his side before and he wouldn't leave his side now.

When he had entered to room, seeing that Fyodor stared at him in disbelief and fear, his eyes not being hazy anymore and lacking all the coldness but now being filled with light again, Nikolai would have nearly dropped everything he had been holding at that moment out of disbelief and shock himself.

He immediately recognized those eyes and at first, he didn't dare to believe that for whatever reason, Punishment was gone for good now.

Nikolai himself, was having a battle with his mind over all this time and slowly he let himself believe that he could be together with Fyodor while being free at the same time.

Nikolai knew by now that Fyodor returned his feelings and he knew that he would wait for him until he was ready and Fyodor did wait.

He waited until they were both ready to finally put into words what they were feeling all those times before, taking the step to finally get together.

Fyodor recovered slowly but aside from the time after losing his ability where he got worse, he was recovering steadily.

Nikolai, who had put his clown attire away by now and who slowly started to eat more again as well as started to somewhat take a bit care of himself again due to Fyodor refusing to eat until Nikolai ate something himself, helped him the whole time.

He continued to feed him, he changed the bandages, made sure that bed and room were clean, after Fyodor was able to sit up again for a few minutes without being in too much pain he would gently wash him every day, he brushed his hair making sure that it wouldn't become matted, he changed his clothes regularly and when the time came he helped him to slowly sit up without leaning against the headboard for support again, he helped him to move around in his bed to scoot over to the edge of the bed, sitting on it and placing his feet on the floor again for the first time since weeks if not months and eventually he helped him to stand up again, taking his first few wobbly steps again.

The first time standing up again was nerve wracking for both of them.

It had been painful to sit up on his own with only a bit support but it was much more manageable than when he first tried to sit up.

He couldn't stand lying in bed any longer.

Nikolai had been looking at him, his eyes filled with worry while he was firmly holding Fyodor's healthy hand with one, and his forearm of the other arm with his other hand.

After getting used to the feeling of sitting up and after the first row of pain got lesser again, Fyodor looked at Nikolai and nodded, him being as tensed up as the other himself, before using all his energy to drag himself out of his bed and up on his feet with Nikolai's help.

His weakened legs were shaky and wobbly and he immediately felt like passing out, his anemia making him see black and flimmering colors for a second but before he could fall, he felt Nikolai wrapping one of his arms around him, careful not to touch the wound on his stomach, steadily holding him and preventing him from falling, letting him slump against him until he was able to see something again a few seconds later.

His legs were shaking, his breathing became faster and he was clinging with his healthy hand to Nikolai as if his life would depend on him but he felt more genuinely happy than he felt since a long time, finally being able to stand again.

However, he quickly had to lie back down again upon the pain and the exhaustion becoming too much, making him feel dizzy and like his legs would give out on him any moment.

Nikolai himself had a big smile and teary eyes as he told Fyodor that he did great, feeling relieved due to seeing how well Fyodor was recovering and that he would be able to walk at least short lengths again being written all over his face.

He also helped him to slowly move his hand more again but just as he had suspected, Fyodor couldn't really move or do anything with his hand anymore.

Teaching himself how to write and how to handle a weapon with his non dominant hand wasn't that difficult for Fyodor but he did struggle with doing daily activities with mostly only one hand and he grieved after not being able to play the cello anymore.

Nikolai tried his best to cheer him up whenever he saw that Fyodor was getting frustrated again because of his hand or when he sensed that he became upset when listening to music including a cello again.

After getting up again for the first time, they would continue to train getting up and walking around again.

The first few times, Fyodor had to hold onto Nikolai and often wasn't able to take more than two or on good days three steps before his legs felt like they would give out again and before the pain coming from the large stab wound became too much again.

However after quite some time had passed, he was able to walk around more freely and without having to hold onto Nikolai as much again.

He was still shaky on his legs, walking quickly became exhausting and painful after a while but he got better and better.

It still took a very long time until he was able to fully get out of bed over nearly a whole day, to walk around and do things completely on his own but Nikolai was there for him the whole time and he continued to be there for him even when Fyodor had fully recovered just like Fyodor was always there for Nikolai when the other needed him.

When the large wound was finally so well healed that Nikolai could finally pull the stitches out, he did try his best not to tear up again, the process reminding him of how he was desperately trying to save his dearest's life but also showing him once again that he did manage to save him, reminding him of how far they came.

After they finally got together after Nikolai was ready and after they both were both in a much better state, both physically and mentally, Nikolai would often kiss Fyodor's injuried hand, holding it as gentle as possible if Fyodor either was upset because of it again or if the chronic pain which developed from the injury became worse again.

Fyodor would always have two large and messy looking scars and a fully scarred hand now but Nikolai didn't mind. He would always tell Fyodor that he looked beautiful, despite all the scars which the other hated so much and he would frequently kiss them whenever he got the opportunity to do so.

After Fyodor had fully recovered and was able to live more independently again, they moved out of the little shabby hideout to live a quiet life underground in a small but cozy house under fake identities and in a different country, far away from where everything went down.

Due to Punishment being gone, Fyodor had no desire to start another war or to get revenge on the ADA anymore.

He just wanted to get as far away from anything which reminded him of this time as it was possible.

He craved to start a new life together with Nikolai, far away from all the things which reminded him if the past.

They might still had a long road of recovery and redemption in front of them but they both felt happier than they've ever been and their relationship was a true and honest one, based on a deep and mutual understanding for each other and based on utter and deep running love which would never end.

If you read all of this, thank you so much! I love u <3

I hope you liked it!

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insoukokuhell-434 · 8 months

Text

Angst & Fluff - skk fics

The format I’m using is:

Title - writer (ao3 link)

Angst related to ( )

Fic length Time period (teen/mafia skk, 22! Skk, all ages) Additional tags (Tags in bold added by me for extra info) TW

Some fics have parts of the summary/ comments added for additional info

Willful Neglect - timeisdancing

Chuuya Dies (temporarily), Chuuya in Emotional & Physical Pain, Dazai's Grief and Guilt

27.9k 22 SKK Angst with a Happy Ending, Time Travel, Not a death fic - It starts off as a death fic but it does not stay that way Dazai Being An Idiot , Dazai Being An Asshole , But he learns his lessons and comes around. Dazai also starts off distant and then goes full simp, Clingy Dazai Dazai needs a hug, Chuuya needs a hug, Mutual Pining, Cuddling & Snuggling, Soft skk, Chuuya Uses Corruption, Dazai Takes Care of Chuuya Grief/Mourning, Self-Hatred, Guilt, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Gaslighting, Manipulation By Mori, Mori Ougai Being An Asshole

hide the truth - writingfromtheshadows

Chuuya's Amnesia, Soukoku in Emotional pain, Soukoku Fight, Dazai's Defection, Dazai's Suicidal ideation

24.6 k 22 SKK Amnesia, Canon Divergence, Unreliable Narrator, Developing Relationship, Pining, Implied Sexual Content, Post-Dead Apple TW- Canon-Typical Violence, Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions

Stay - the_most_happy

Dazai feels guilt, Soukoku Fight, Soukoku in Emotional & Physical Pain

23.6k 22 SKK AU - Canon Divergence Deaf Chuuya, sign language, Chuuya is so done, Dazai tries his best Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Chuuya in Denial, Feelings Realization, First Kiss, Kiss Kiss Fall in Love, Idiots in Love, Love confessions in the rain because SKK are dramatic, Getting Together, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Skk's Unconventional Mating Rituals, Developing Relationship, Relationship Study, Soft skk Hurt/Comfort, Literal Sleeping Together, Domestic Fluff, Canon Compliant, Sweet

Around We Go (And Back Again)- by zombiemarker

Soukoku Fight, Soukoku in Emotional Pain

24.2k 22 SKK ADA Chuuya, Angst and Humor, Fluff, Dazai Osamu is Bad at Feelings, Nakahara Chuuya Is So Done, Nakahara Chuuya Needs a Break, Hurt/Comfort, ADA Ensemble, Minor Shin Soukoku TW- Attempted Murder

What doesn't kill me (makes me want you more) - the_most_happy

Soukoku Fight

5.5k 22 SKK (Post-Canon, Post-109) Character Study, Established Relationship, Enemies and Lovers, Love Confessions, Possessive Dazai, Caring Chuuya, Resolved Sexual Tension, non-Graphic Smut, Pillow Talk, Sleepy Kisses, Soft skk, skk’s Unconventional Mating Rituals, Canon Compliant

hey look, the sky's falling apart - saffroncassis

Child Abuse, Dazai's Depression & Self harm

24.8k TEEN SKK (16/17) AU - Canon Divergence Hurt/Comfort, Protective Nakahara Chuuya, Developing Relationship Found Family (the Akutagawa siblings, Oda's kids, Kyouka, Oda, Ango) TW- Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse and discussions of both these

Summary - "At age 16, Chuuya defects from the Port Mafia and drags his partner with him not so much kicking and screaming as silently begrudging, and the rest follow suit in time."

For the Record - zombiemarker

Soukoku Fight, Dazai & Chuuya in Emotional/Physical Pain, Childhood Trauma

19.1k TEEN SKK AU- Spies & Secret Agents Emotional & Physical Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Childhood Trauma, they get all dressed up and go to a gala, Implied Sexual Content, Literal sleeping together, Getting together, First kiss, Developing Relationship TW - Blood and Violence, Childhood Trauma

From tags: "Chuuya's a government experiment, Dazai's been with Mori for years, they've both got trauma now"

Love is not a victory march - osamuchuu

Dazai's Depression, Suicide Attempts and Drug Addiction

8.7k 22 SKK Soukoku taking care of each other, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mental Illness, Depression, Drug Addiction, Blood and Injury, Healing, Recovery, Soukoku Tenderness, Light Angst TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide References and Attempts, Addiction, Drug Use

Grown on me - Jules_tea

Chuuya in Physical and Emotional Pain

16.9k 22 SKK Alternate Universe - Post-Canon Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Possessive Chuuya, Jealous Dazai, Caring Dazai, Chuuya Uses Corruption, a new mission but at what cost, Love Confessions, Getting Together TW- Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions

From Summary - "Or, a story in which Nakahara Chuuya and Dazai Osamu come to accept their feelings, one way or another… and Dazai helps Chuuya finally accept himself."

They Were Different - nillakit

Chuuya in Emotional Pain, Soukoku Fight

11.9k 22 SKK Getting Together, Angst with a Happy Ending, They actually talk about shit

Lighter Angst

escalators to the moon - boyfangs

Soukoku Fight, Chuuya in Emotional Pain

20.6 k TEEN SKK AU - No abilities Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Emotional Constipation, First Kiss, Getting Together, Bickering, they’re both gay & petty, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort Found Family (Chuuya, Rimbaud, Verlaine)

Learning experiences by BlowingYourMind

Chuuya's PTSD

13k MAFIA SKK Light Angst, Fluff and Humor, missed childhoods, let them be children for once please and thank you, Chuuya-centric, Chuuya Is So Done, Panic Attacks, Flashbacks, Dazai is a Mess, Chuuya Takes Care of Dazai, Dazai Takes Care of Chuuya, Dazai Needs a Hug, Chuuya Needs a Hug, they both get hugs Chuuya Uses Corruption, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Sharing a Bed, Cuddling & Snuggling, Soft skk, Mori Being An Asshole

From Summary: "Chuuya can't read. Dazai can't ride a bike. They both can't swim for one reason or another. All learning experiences they missed out on in their early childhood, though it seemed that they would need to make up for lost time."

Bitter/Sweet - Badwolf36

Chuuya in Physical Pain

4.1k Post-Corruption (Post-Dead Apple) Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Caring Dazai, Soft Dazai, Chuuya Needs a Hug, Angst, Stabbing, First Aid, Denial of Feelings, denial, pain

Please like/reblog if this helped u find a fic, I'd be delighted to know <33

Angst with a Happy Ending fics

Soukoku Fic Rec Masterlist

#soukoku #soukoku fics #soukoku fic rec #skk fic rec #skk fics #13 in total :D #sierra's recs #(all happy endings btw!)#Sierra’s posts 🌸

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evermorethecrow · 10 months

Note

FUCK I FORGOT THE QUESTION PART

by forgot i mean i have no idea how to ask questions

UHHHH

tell me ... about it ??? what sort of ada au is it, does he start out in the ada is it a switch with dazai does mori do some fucked up shit so he has to leave?? give me all the details

sorry im terrible at this

How dare you be insecure in the asks I don't bite..

ANYWAY SO

ADA!Chuuya!!!

He leaves the port mafia during to almost after stormbringer and I won't say how or why but I will say Verlaine helps him. NOW joining the ada as an unstable 16 year old nuclear reactor is not the best especially when it's small and very loving and Chuuya's last found families ended terribly. Now chuuya really struggled when he first joined for a bunch of reasons a few being

Fresh out the sheep he fears the ada is using him for attack purposes especially since they don't have any strong combat fighters

fresh out of the port mafia he feels like he can't do good thing

Fresh out the flags he feels like accepting a new family straight away is saying he didn't care about them and he feels like allowing there affection is dishonourable to their memory

Small other point on the flags. Chuuya feels like the flags would have wanted him to stay with the pm and he's putting all they did for him to waste

So chuuya already has a few issues there, now let's add a few more. Chuuya doesn't like Fukuzawa because he feels like Fukuzawa wants him as firepower and he wants chuuya to forget the flags and chuuya doesn't like ranpo because he knows to much about his past and chuuya doesn't like yosano cause he just went through all of those things with Prof. N

Now what does chuuya do about all of this? Act out. He'll be disrespectful to Fukuzawa and yosano and he'll be reckless with himself in missions (keep in mind he's not being reckless with the safety of others in this. Only himself). Chuuya is doing this because of his feelings and because he doesn't believe the agency care for him and he's trying to make them snap- which doesn't work, instead he gets a long talk with ranpo that calms him down somewhat (I forgot to mention entrance exams but chuuya kinda has two- one when he first joins thats easy because ranpo had a plan, and a second actual one which is him accepting the agency). He's not rude to Fukuzawa now just distant but he's avoiding yosano like the plague. Chuuya gets injured and tries to hide it, when Fukuzawa finds out he's dragged to the infirmary where he freaks out and breaks some of Yosano's equipment. Yosano is pissed (but not actually) and as punishment she makes him her errand boy for a month and during the whole errand thing chuuya actually befreinds yosano. Now cause this is getting super long I'm gonna shorten the rest. Chuuya becomes Yosano's apprentice and then he ends up working with her in the Ada's medical field this cements the fact he isn't being used as a weapon as he originally agreed because medical work doesn't require tainted as attack, he also does it as a way to make up for all the blood he's shed before. Yosano helped him learn some value in life but his morals are still a bit off. Chuuya's outfits in the ada au also have symbolism I'll bring up another time but that's it for now!!

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs manga #chuuya #nakahara chuuya #chuuyabsd #chuuya au #evermore answers

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aidendh · 2 months

Text

Incarnate Ideas p2

RAU = Incarnate from birth

REAU = My heroes reborn

RAU! Marinette

(RAU! Fyodor)

Abigail Harris → RAU! Fyodor Dostoevsky → RAU! Marinette Dupain-Cheng

RAU! Hisashi Midoriya

(RAU! Ryunosuke Akutagawa [P5 Timeline])

Abigail Harris → RAU! Ryunosuke Akutagawa → RAU! Hisashi Midoriya

Stayed with the family but does 'odd jobs'

Overprotective of Izuku

RAU! Tachihara

(RAU! Chuuya)

RAU! Odasaku

(RAU! Luka)

On his passing (as Luka), sass blessed him with the ability of second Chance mixed with flawless

(Second Chance has to be activated)

RAU! Odasaku

(Kenji line, post-Ryu)

Reforms Osamu, Chuuya and the Akutagawas

Saved by Undefeated by the Rain

(Still gives dazai a scare to show him the meaning of life)

"and I swear, if you eat my soba, I will haunt you."-OS

Dazai figures it out because his stomach growls

(Dazai knows the signs of UbtR and Flawless)

RAU! Fyodor Dostoevsky

(Kenji line, post-oda)

Bnha! Player! Shoto Todoroki

(Non RAU)

Player: 'Suke'

Version: English

Costume: Blue ver

Can only exit game when asleep

(Bnha would real, but he is player)

(Basically SAO/Dreams of estora[Aphmau])

RAU! Zane Ro'meave

(RAU Kenji line / post-Oda)

Very close with Garroth

"I'm older than you!" -ZR

PDH, Garroth often has to make sure he has lunch

'Chuunibyou kid'

Cosplay's as Dazai Osamu, Chara and Ryunosuke Akutagawa(with scarf)

RAU! Jeff the Killer

(RAU! Ryunosuke Akutagawa[Mirac ver])

Vauge memories and Vivid dreams

¿White hair from stress?

RAU! Inosuke (KnY)

(Clawacorn)

RAU! Hound Dog

(Clawacorn)

Staff at UA have to have monthly therapy sessions

Used Aizawa's scarf to drag him in for his

Calls Allmight a walking corps

Still has magic but keeps to passive use, soul sensing/reading

Stubborn

Jealous of hawks

"*Humf*How come he got to have wings..."-HD

"They say animals can tell what you're feeling. And Hound Dog is proof of that."-UA Staff

RAU! Satoru Fujinuma

(RAU! Oda Sakunosuke [Kenji Line])

Still has Undefeated by the Rain

Escapes the car with his ability and jumps onto the road

REAU! Shoto Todoroki

(Me)

Hit after USJ but on his own

Runs away, finds Dabi (more likely to be classmate than Dabi)

Left after getting a giant burn slash over his back for Enji

RAU! Itadori (JJK)

(RAU Fyodor)

Dormant Punishment

(When awoken, will be territorial)

{Haven't watched the show}

RAU! Hitoshi Shinso

(Fyodor Hinata)

Secret leader of a Vigilante group

Uses quirk before meetings so no one remembers except for hazy images

REAU! Ochaco Uraraka

(RAU! Noel)

REAU! Denki Kaminari

(Oc! Hesko Woodside)

RAU! Zhongli

(Me)

REAU! Shoto Todoroki

(Suke Harris [Persona])

Dyes red hair - brown

Calls father - Todoroki-san

Comes up with many excuses to stay out of home

RAU! Yusuke Kitagawa

(RAU! Fyodor Hinata)

Would side with shadow Madarame

Has a blind faith and loyalty to family

Would get in the way of the PT

Awakening would have tears

Mask: Japanese Rat Mask

(Shaped like Ann's, but Yusukes colors/design)

RAU! Izuku Midoriya

(Suke Harris)

Vigilante analysist that attacks heroes to teach them (few days later, they'ed get a booklet to work from / then attack again few weeks later to see if they learned)

Mutters a lot

Helped Iida get a head start in exam as appolagise for muttering

Hero Name: Jack Rabbit

(Has fake rabbit ears on hood to redirect sounds and let air in/out hood)

(Desaturated green long hooded coat)

His school blazer is longer

White hair tufts

Stain *Ideal* Supporter

Had to be threatened with expoltion to shut up after interrupting Aizawa-Sensei's introduction with a fanboy ramble(without saying Erasurehead)

REAU! Shoto Todoroki

(R!Ryunosuke (Hinata Atsushi))

16!AU! Ryunosuke Harris

16, switch into UK by teleportation ability after first meeting ADA Dazai

Gets taken in by the Harris family who believe he was abused

Won't go anywhere without a knife

Secondary school, friend Thomas Harrid

If they find ability, he hides in cocoon when scared

Dyes his tufts black for school

#aiden's aus #rau #oc #reincarnation #incarnate ideas #my heroes reborn

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80sgaytrashgoblin · 2 years

Text

A Proper explanation for my ADA!Chuuya (+ others) AU

The base premise is that when Dazai left the Port Mafia, Chuuya left with him, but I did some shuffling of the order of events (mainly cause I love found family and drama), so that + other details are under the cut.

Plotline:

Right after the Dragon’s Head Conflict (lets ignore Stormbringer for now, I’ll fit Verlaine and the other nerds in a different way), Dazai drags Chuuya out drinking with Ango and Oda, cause otherwise he was wasting away in his room out of grief.

Oda quickly became the older brother figure to Dazai and Chuuya, with Ango being like the one braincell of the group (Oda is relegated to Chuuya and Dazai wrangling duty, and those two are teenagers, no other explanation needed)

He even introduced his kids to Chuuya and Dazai, and they became cool older brothers.

Chuuya is on a mission out of town for multiple days while the Mimic thing goes on. Mori sacrifices Oda, not just because it was convenient but also because he noticed that Dazai was getting too close to Oda and was worried that he would lose control of Dazai. He’s hoping that by killing Oda off, Dazai will learn the lesson that getting too close to people is a weakness.

Chuuya gets back from the mission and is going to report to Mori right as Dazai is leaving HQ. Dazai is panicking and Nakahara “Ride or Fucking Die” Chuuya is on board finding Oda.

They do not get there in time to save Oda, but they do get there in time for Oda to have one last monologue about how they should go to the light side.

Chuuya is still supposed to be away, so he goes to scout out a new place to live (in Suribachi City, his old home with the Sheep and familiar territory) while Dazai takes the last two weeks to tie up loose ends.

The day they finally, properly leave they grab some important documents, blow up Mori’s car and skeddadle. (they are 17 here)

Now, their new home is two shipping containers and a shed that were cobbled together with Chuuya’s bare hands, a knife, and a mission. Chuuya managed to make some friends already (you can pry extrovert Chuuya from my cold dead hands) who managed to hook them up with electricity, water, all that jazz. It’s definitely a downgrade from mafia luxury, but it’s barable.

They also don’t get help from Ango or Taneda. They’re on their own, Soukoku against the world.

They make it three months shut in before Chuuya snaps and gets a couple of jobs: Walmart janitor on the shitty end of town at the night shift, and a barista at Cafe Uzumaki. (Yes, this does mean Chuuya meets the ADA early)

Dazai also makes some friends with a coalition of thief hookers, who basically wander around the rich sections of Yokohama and pretend to be prostitutes to rob rich assholes. Oda said to be on the side that helps people, not to not break laws, so...

Over the next year, Dazai takes Akutagawa under his wing as a pseudo apprentice, and Chuuya meets Gin and subsequently starts plying her with food and stuff stolen from the Walmart he’s working at.

After an incident involving Akutagawa getting sick, a panicked call to Yosano from Chuuya, and Dazai punching a dude in the throat (not in that order), the Akutagawa siblings move in with them.

At some point, Dazai interferes on an Agency case, along with Ryuu, and are promptly given job opportunities. Dazai’s not one to pass on a good deal, so he takes the job, and Ryuu agrees only on the condition that Gin be allowed an internship as well. (Gin doesn’t have an ability and is not committing fraud like Ranpo, so legally she’s just a secretary, but off the books she’s a detective too)

Chuuya is reluctant to join another organization (his track record is not the best, both the Sheep and the Port Mafia have stabbed him in the back), but after an incident involving some assholes with guns attacking the cafe, he takes the job.

When they both signed up, Chuuya and Dazai informed Fukuzawa of the fact that they were former Port Mafia (not that they were Soukoku specifically or their rank). They struck a deal: anything that needed to be done that can’t be done by the other detectives, they would do (basically less legal activities and murders). They’re former Port Mafia, they already have blood on their hands. They couldn’t do that to the kids.

And three/four years after the family of four join the agency is when BSD canon starts. (I have alterations after this point but they will remain a mystery for now)

Other stuff that didn’t fit into the Plotline TM:

Suribachi City world building! I also have some OCs, but I’m in the middle of fleshing them out so they’ll be coming later.

A large portion of the town worship Arahabaki, for forming the crater and thus Suribachi City in the first place, so he’s become sort of a patron god of the place. There’s a shrine in the Shipyard section of the city, where Arahabaki is depicted in a statue as a wolf/ram hybrid. (This will have effects later down the line)

The Shipyard section of Suribachi City is just a neighborhood where all the dwellings are made of reused shipping containers, it’s where Dazai and Chuuya set up

At first the staff at Cafe Uzumaki are afraid of the crazy detectives, so when Chuuya is hired and immediately calls out the other baristas for being wusses and bringing their orders over, sassing Ranpo, Yosano and Kunikida the whole time, an immediate friendship is borne.

Because of Chuuya’s aforementioned extrovertedness, a lot of people in Suribachi City know him and are friendly to him. By accident he gained a lot of power. Dazai is known to multiple people exclusively as “Chuuya’s friend” or “Chuuya’s boyfriend” or “Chuuya’s armcandy” and he loves it. The Akutagawa’s are similarly known as Chuuya’s kids or younger siblings, so they get along well enough with people.

Suribachi City itself is self governed (mainly because law enforcement doesn’t want to touch the place) and exists on a barter system, most people living there don’t use yen at all.

For a while the Sheep functioned as as a sort of law enforcement within the town, but when they disbanded (as a result of many of them perishing in the Dragon’s Head Conflict), a new group emerged called the Wolves (with the help of Chuuya and Dazai). This group functions a lot better than the Sheep because their survival is not dependant on one person (Chuuya), but they have multiple ability users. The main leadership is a council of ten, with five ability users and five non-ability users, to make sure everyone is equally represented. Chuuya and Dazai are honorary members.

One night, while drunk, Dazai and Chuuya decided that their legal names on their brand new totally clean profiles would just be their last names switched, so Dazai is legally Nakahara Osamu and Chuuya is Dazai Chuuya. They committed to the bit, and now they constantly joke that they’re husbands. Ango is constantly stressed by this decision.

The Sheep have a pseudo shrine next to the statue of Arahabaki. It’s an apple tree, with Sheep bracelets hung on the branches. The shrine maiden who tends Arahabaki’s shrine also tends the apple tree.

It’s not super important to the narrative but it’s important to me that you all know that Dazai loves to cross dress, and probably does it casually enough that neither Ryuu nor Gin blink an eye at Dazai wearing a skirt.

Dazai and Chuuya also have a cat named Mickey. She was their compromise, because Dazai didn’t want any pets while Chuuya really wanted a dog. Her name is Mickey because it’s short for McDonald’s, because Dazai found her in a McDonald’s container.

#ada chuuya au #au infodump #bungou stray dogs #bsd au

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sensitiveheartless · 2 years

Note

(crime crossdressing dazai anon) "I'm personally always excited to hear other people's ideas for ADA Chuuya!" FULL STEAM AHEAD THEN YEEHAW!!!!

So this requires some reordering of events: mainly I'm placing the Dark Era a few months after the Dragons Head conflict, which makes them roughly 16/17. Also the Akutagawa siblings don't join the mafia, this becomes relevant later (also I hc that while the conflict didn't orphan the Akutagawas, it destroyed whatever orphanage/foster family they were living at at the time, forcing them onto the streets)

Anyways, the main divergence for the au is that after the Dragon's Head conflict, Dazai practically drags Chuuya to Bar Lupin because he was "being too depressed and that's Dazai’s job." Thus Chuuya becomes a part of the Buihara Trio (renamed the Buihara Squadro for reasons) and imprinting on Oda as an older brother figure (and Dazai’s a little jealous in the beginning but he figures that if he's sharing with the Slug its fine and definitely not because it makes Chuuya smile more)

During the Mimic fiasco, Chuuya is away on a mission out of Yokohama, but he manages to come back a couple days early. He's actually about to give his report to Mori when he runs into Dazai, who hurriedly tells him that Odasaku is in danger and they need to hurry. Oda's last words to Soukoku is to urge them to become better people in the light.

So they run away, and hunker down in a shelter in Suribachi city, because it's familiar territory for Chuuya and all of Dazai's safe houses are known to Mori. Dazai secretly gets them new paperwork through Ango (they're legally Nakahara Osamu and Dazai Chuuya, and they joke that they're husbands), and Chuuya picks up a stray cat and brings it home.

But the money runs out after two months in hiding, because Mori still controlled most of Dazai's accounts and rerouted the money to himself, shutting them down. So Chuuya got a job as an after hours janitor to a sketchy Walmart that doesn't do background checks and a second job as a barista at Cafe Uzumaki (the one underneath the ADA) and Dazai basically sold information to various law organizations.

During this time Chuuya meets Gin and Dazai meets Ryuunosuke respectively, remembering Oda, and Chuuya steals stuff from Walmart to give to Gin and Dazai takes Ryuu under his wing as an apprentice. Eventually the two move in, and it's pretty common to see the two reading books or playing Blackjack (Dazai taught them both casino tricks, Chuuya was pissed) at the Cafe while Chuuya was working.

Because Chuuya had formed a friendship with the ADA already, it's actually pretty painless for the Nakahara-Dazai family to join. Gin became a secretary since she didn't have an ability, but she does tag along and help with cases "under the table." Dazai and Chuuya also disclose to Fuluzawa in advance that they were former Port Mafia, but not their past status or title as Double Black (mainly because the Dep of Special Abilities or whatever put out a "Kill at Will" order on Soukoku).

Chuuya and Dazai's relationship is so much healthier. On the surface it appears to be the same with bickering and stupid prank wars, but they're much more vulnerable and honest with each other than in the mafia. The ADA taught them healthy communication, and it made their relationship so much better.

Chuuya is ride or die for his new family, and trusts them to have his back this time and not fall apart when he isn't looking (he also mother hens the younger members, giving him the office nickname of Chuu-niisan). Dazai is slowly learning to be more honest with the ADA and live for his family instead of throwing his life away (he's still as lazy as ever but the kids have learned, and Dazai has to bribe them with treats and things to do his paperwork). Ryuunosuke has a healthier relationship with Dazai, still idolizing him but also not putting up with any of his shit. Gin is thriving, and is trusted as the last member of Defense for the ADA (Chuuya taught her how to throw knives).

I have more but I think that's enough for now, expect more soon.

YESS I LOVE THIS ;; Anon I would read the heck out of this, I JUST WANT CHUUYA TO HAVE LOTS OF ALIVE FRIENDS also yes I want him mother henning everyone alksdfjsdkfj I also do love Chuuya interacting with Ango and Oda even if that's ow one more dead friend but still—aaaaaa

#still have a bit of a backlog on asks #sorry about the wait for everyone I haven't gotten to yet!#been having a weird time lol #ask box #bsd #goblin anon

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grymmnox · 1 year

Text

weekly fic recs #28

uh. i think it’s 28? almost forgot ti was saturday,, whoops! my computer is struggling. so much. anyways, lets get into it.

edit: I CANNOT BELIEVE IF ORGOT A LINK anyways its there now ok enjoy the fic

fandom(s): bungo stray dogs, the owl house (the finale aired,, i read some fics, ofc!)

ship(s): soukoku, shin soukoku, ranpoe, lumity, huntlow, and ofc some gen fics

Oneshots

Discovering My Inhumanity; UnfunnyClown - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 9.3k words | dazai & PM, dazai & mori, dazai & hirotsu, dazai & kouyou, chuuya & dazai, chuuya & dazai & rimbaud, dazai & Q, dazai & fyodor | READ TAGS

summary:

Some people go through their entire life without realising they have an ability. Osamu Dazai is not one of those people, no matter how much he wishes he was.

Five times Dazai learns something new about No Longer Human, one time he shares a discovery. (Au in which No Longer Human functions differently)

The Demon Prodigy; YunaYamiMouto - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 14.4k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, ADA & dazai, dazai & PM

summary:

The Demon Prodigy, basically a myth in the underworld, Port Mafia's most dangerous and precious asset, seemingly re-emerges after four years of silence. ADA is in hysterics. The Port Mafia is laughing their asses off. Dazai is Not Amused and Chuuya is less than Not Pleased with Soukoku's name being dragged through the mud. Shenanigans ensue.

To What End?; WaxWings (Greyality) - bungo stray dogs

mature | 2.7k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, dazai & mori, ADA & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

"And you!" Yosano points an accusing finger in his direction, "Don't tell me you didn't know exactly what that sick fucking bastard had in mind. Don't tell me you didn't know that Mori wanted to--to--" Her voice falters, nausea and memories closing her throat all at once before she manages to spit out an acidic final accusation, "...you knew."

Ranpo refuses to meet her eyes.

"Of course I knew," He says, "But you know better than anyone that no matter our ability, there are some people that can't be saved."

"Dazai isn't some people."

----

Or I couldn't resist writing one of those fics where Dazai returns to the mafia to protect Yosano after the Hunting Dogs arc

Who Cares If It’s Gay, As Long As I’m With You; Mystic_Panda_4 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 18.5k words | chuuya/dazai

summary:

Dazai and Chuuya have been engaged for just over five months now and Dazai is tired of waiting for a wedding. They've already told their coworkers, they've been fiancés for soooo long now, that really, they should just skip the wedding and go straight to the honeymoon right? And what better way to celebrate their honeymoon then by going on a road trip across the country they fell in love in. And of course, Dazai definetly has no surprises planned because what could possibly go wrong as Soukoku tackles America.

***

"Chuuya, look, there's a sign for Little Tokyo!" "No, absolutely not." "But wouldn't it be fun to see how accurate it is?" "Dazai, we are soaking wet and I personally am freezing, I am not making a detour in Little Tokyo so we can walk around wet and cold just to see how accurate it is." There was blissful silence in the car for a few moments, and then- "Chuuya, is it gay if we're in Japan but Japan is in America?" "Who cares if it's gay? As long as I'm with you, I'm sure you'll find some way to to turn it gay anyways." "Aww, Chuuya, I love you too."

all my own; halfbloom (diphylleias) - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 17.4k words | chuuya/dazai

summary:

“A day off?” Chuuya echoes, blinking slowly.

“Yes,” Mori repeats with a chuckle, but it sounds like an order this time. “A day off. Do with it as you please.” And right as Chuuya is opening his mouth to ask why, Mori perks up and says, “Ah, I instructed Dazai-kun to take the day off as well.” He smiles serenely. “So you two may spend it together, if you’d like.”

Chuuya’s eye twitches.

In between carnival games and ice cream stands, Chuuya learns a thing or two at seventeen about normalcy, cotton candy, and hand-holding.

Feet Over Harsh Ground; izanyas - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 8.1k words | dazai & kunikida & yosano, chuuya/dazai

summary:

When two foreigners ask the armed detective agency to collect something in the ruins of the military base near Suribachigai, Fukuzawa sends Yosano and Kunikida to investigate. Dazai, the agency’s newest recruit, asks to come along.

Alternately: Yosano accidentally makes a study out of Dazai, Kunikida is too tired for the both of them, and sometimes all it takes to open up is one too many drinks.

the wolves that guard their wounds; boopiejokes - the owl house

teen and up | 4.5k words | eda & luz, hunter & luz, eda & hunter, flapjack & hunter | READ TAGS

summary:

“Hooty, if someone’s here, why didn’t you—”

Luz’s eyes popped out of their sockets. “Oh…”

Hooty flicked his frightened eyes to her — and if something freaked Hooty out, then Luz was in the storm for something — then down at the boy on the ground who was painting the grass darker with his blood outside the door.

I Will Always Return; the_sentient_duck - the owl house

teen and up | 5k words | hunter & vee | READ TAGS

summary:

Once upon a time, Hunter met a basilisk, striking up a friendship that changed both of their lives for the better.

Frenemies; sakarrie - the owl house

general audiences | 3.2k words | hunter & luz

summary:

Hunter gets a mysterious message telling him to meet them at the night market. He really should have realized Luz would be behind this.

Or: Post-ASIAS, Luz doesn't like the idea of Hunter suddenly showing up at Hexside and almost kidnapping her friends.

Come Morning Light; Sokkas_First_Fangirl - the owl house

general audiences | 10.7k words | camila & hunter & luz & vee, camila & hunter, camila & luz, camila & vee, amity/luz, hunter & luz, luz & vee, camila & everyone, hunter/willow, gus & hunter | READ TAGS

summary:

Camila always dreamed of having a big family. She came from one, Manny came from one; they were in agreement that they wanted a whole bunch of kids.

Things didn’t work out that way. Manny got sick and that became the focus of Camila’s life. She tried to shield Luz as best she could, but Luz was growing up, growing wiser every day; she could see the dawning horror in her daughter’s eyes, the knowledge that Manny wasn’t getting better.

Manny died holding her hand and their dreams of a huge, loud family died with him.

Fate had other plans.

(Vee was hers in a heartbeat. Camila had a soft spot for Hunter, but she didn’t begin to think of him as hers until the end of the kids’ second month with her.)

Camila's always dreamed of a big family; she just didn't expect to become a mother of three in such an unconventional way.

Or, a study in Camila Noceda and her growing bond with Hunter.

Complete Fics

he’s got big sharp teeth (and big fat hips); bunterasu - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 3 chapters | 14.7k words | akutagawa/atsushi, chuuya/dazai, akutagawa & chuuya, poe/ranpo

summary:

Before Akutagawa could realize what he was saying, the words were tumbling out of his mouth and into the air between them: “Use Rashoumon.”

Akutagawa slapped his hand over his mouth so hard it stung. Atsushi’s mouth fell open, his ears going slightly pink as he processed what the raven-haired boy said.

“Excuse me?”

Akutagawa’s face was bright red under his hand. “I didn’t say anything.”

“Did you just suggest that I teethe on Rashoumon?”

“I said nothing of the sort, Weretiger!”

or, Akutagawa, Atsushi, and the universal teenage experience of teething.

Wrapped up in You; quinnlocke - bungo stray dogs

mature (altho i think it. could be rated explicit. sexual content) | 24 chapters | 100.9k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

Chuuya just wants to get through his day as a reptile expert, but there's a bandaged lunatic in his reptile house trying to get murdered by his snakes.

Saving the man's life is a courtesy, taking him home is just asking for trouble.

the blood on my hands is yours to keep; zyria - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 5 chapters | 13k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai

summary:

Dazai and Chuuya have been in a secret relationship the entire time since Dazai defected from the Mafia. Everyone knows. Except Dazai, that is.

Or, an alternative retelling of the four year divorce where soukoku keeps in contact, because come on, four years is a bit too long to miss someone, even for these two idiots, probably.

"I'm betraying the mafia."

"Uh huh."

"We're enemies now."

"Sure."

Dazai sighs. Chuuya is always impossible, this is why he hates him so much.

"Why aren't you trying to kill me?"

"Why aren't you?"

Incomplete Fics

Dazai and Chuuya’s teenage camera roll; meezla - bungo stray dogs

general audiences | 14/20 chapters | 10.3k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, atsushi & dazai, dazai & kunikida, ADA & dazai

summary:

When Dazai's past at the Mafia is known by everyone at the agency and Dazai tells everyone that he still has his old phone, the agency can't help but go through it.

Dazai and Chuuya filmed a bunch of videos on Dazai's old phone when they were 15-18 and the agency watched all of them.

kerosene hearts; orphan_account - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 7/? chapters | 16.9k words | chuuya/dazai, akutagawa/atsushi

summary:

Chuuya doesn’t have any gloves on which he always wears, and the skin beneath is clear, pure, unscarred from Corruption and that these hands are not his. It takes longer than it should have, the knowledge settling in like a black cloud over his figure on the unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room in what must be an equally unfamiliar apartment that this is not his body.

This is Dazai Osamu’s body, wrapped in bandages and taller than he is and lanky and not Chuuya’s at all. // the body swap that no one, especially chuuya, akutagawa, atsushi (and by some extension, dazai) asked for. //

grim’s notes: obviously this has been orphaned, so don’t expect any updates lmao. still a good fic nonetheless

i’ll die in his cold, cold arms; venusdahlia - bungo stray dogs

mature | 24/? chapters | 115k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

“Dazai-san, you’re staring.” Atsushi noticed, finding a spot over the railing next to Dazai. “Hm. I guess so.” He replied, not looking away from the rink. Just for a moment, the brunet’s eyes reflected the bright light from the overhead lights, a bright glow engulfing them. “It’s not that often I have the time to see you guys act so barbaric, it’s very entertaining.”

Atsushi gave the other a light shove. “Is that really what you’re here to see?”

Annoyed, Dazai moved his gaze with narrow eyes towards Atsushi. Before he could shoot back at him, a loud yell from the rink interrupted them. “THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKING AT, YOU LOUSY PILE OF BANDAGES?!”

Where after losing a bet, Nakahara Chuuya, a skilled but short-tempered hockey player, is forced to train with Dazai Osamu , the most annoying figure skater he had the misfortune to meet.

carrier pigeon boy; Anonymous - the owl house

teen and up | 3/? chapters | 15k words | belos & hunter, eda & hunter, eda & owlbert, eda & king, lilith & hunter | READ TAGS

summary:

“It’s a shame you have these… things,” they spat, lifting a wing up once again but with a lot more force, stretching it high and picking at the plumage. Their hand plucked a feather, inspecting it- and he held still, breathless, a drop of blood welling from the spine. “The curse of wild magic never leaves.”

“Wild… wild magic?” he asked, quietly.

They nodded. “It destroyed this village, our family. They took you hostage- are you alright?”

"I’m your uncle, Hunter. Uncle Belos.”

Making a grimwalker goes wrong, somehow. Maybe he used too much palistrom wood, or somehow finally using his brother's heart instead of bone had more of an effect than he thought it would. Because this one has wings. This one, isn't quite as witch or human as it is animal and other; wings like the palisman of the witch that lead his brother astray. The very form of the palisman that lead him away.

But maybe it's a good thing. Even if this one is cursed by wild magic, and couldn't even take on a humanlike form- and could become less than an animal, take the form of a bird, it just meant he didn't need to feel guilty when he killed it.

#[.grims weekly recs]#[.grims recs]#fic recs #reclist #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd fic recs #bungo stray dogs fic recs #bungou stray dogs fic recs #toh #the owl house #toh fic recs #the owl house fic recs

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monarchamos · 1 year

Text

thinking abt an au where dazai convinces chuuya to ditch the pm and join the ada and he gives chuuya his trench coat bc "its tradition for new recruits to receive a piece of clothing from the person who brought them in"

also chuuya totally has to hem it and it STILL is nearly floor-length and he has to actually tie its belt and it goes off his shoulders (yk like that one official art that everyone loves you know the one)

dazai's like “chuuya you dont actually have to wear it if it really is too big we literally have a 21 cm height diff i understand”

but chuuya is so adamant on wearing it bc its the first sign he's gone into the light and it reminds him of detective murase and its a gift from dazai he can't just not wear the oversized trench coat

UPDATE: I drew it

#chuuya walks into the office on the first day and kunikida goes “dazai why is the missing mafia executive in our office WEARING YOUR COAT?”#and yosano is giving him this smug ass look like “oh they fucked” and ranpo starts a betting pool abt it #also chuuya has a red shirt like how dazai has a blue shirt bc they really do be the red/blue gays #i need to post the design one of these days bc im insane #also chuuya still keeps his hat bc he tried to give it back to verlaine but verlaine's all like no chuuya you should keep it #also he keeps his hat bc i couldnt take away chuuya being called mr fancy hat by ranpo #verlaine is so happy his little brother is living a good human life he even helps his escape #bsd #soukoku #bsd au #dazai drags chuuya into the ada au

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jumpingjaxx13 · 3 years

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📚 📖 📓📕📒📔📘📗📙

Lol

The joke's on you. I have a ton of these and I'm about to make it everyone's problem.

Put "📓" into my inbox and I'll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven't written but daydream about.

(I'm gonna cheat a little. The ones with * are ones that I have started writing, but are incomplete/have been WIPs for a long time/nowhere close to being done. I feel like that counts just because of the amount of daydreaming/not writing that goes into them lol)

(Also, if there is any that someone is particularly interested in reading once it's finished, just leave a reply and I'll reach out with a link once it's published!)

This is going to be a long post, so I'll put the answer under a read more!

📚 *

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Ships: ShigaDabi (primary), TodoDeku (background, maybe)

An AU where Tenko Shimura was found by Inko Midoriya instead of AFO and raised as Izuku's brother. He winds up becoming Hawks's secretary, meets All Might and learns about his grandmother, and gets to proudly watch his brother follow his dreams. Things start to change when he meets a strange man outside of a cafe and falls for him. How was he supposed to know that Dabi was a villain!? From there, Tenko has to do a lot of self reflection and decide what he wants to do after learning about his boyfriend's identity, especially when he found out that his boss had known all along. Does he chase after Dabi? Join him? Turn him in? I'm not 100% sure how I want to end this, but I am tempted for it to lead to the "birth" of Tomura. Any suggestions would be welcome!

📖*

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Ships: N/A, maybe background Duo Holders?

Essentially an AFO origin story focusing on his relationship with Yoichi over the course of his descent. I take a few snapshots of the brothers together, starting as teens and going through to his death, and showing how their regard for each other changed. It finally ends with AFO speaking to Yoichi's grave years later. I'm a fan of DFO, so I'm going to be using the name Hisashi for him, but if/when his canon name comes out, I'll be changing it to match!

📓

Fandom: Death Note

Ships: LawLight (primary), MattMello (secondary)

An AU where Roger Ruvie dies early on in the investigation and, with the entire world under suspicion, L can't afford to replace him. Instead, he sends the majority of the kids off to other houses that Watari had built, save for his top three successors. Near, Mello, and Matt all move into the Task Force HQ and, despite L's "best efforts" to prevent it (read: he's totally just pretending to stop them to please the others), they continually find themselves thrown in the middle of the investigation. I'm also not 100% certain how I want this to end, but I do know that it's going to be endgame L/Light and Matt/Mello.

📕*

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs

Ships: RanPoe (past), ODazai (past, platonic or romantic), SteinCraft (past, background)

A sequel to Unstoppable Force. I've had a few people express interest in the culprit, so I've decided to write up an optional sequal that explains it. I debated not doing it, but I know that a lot of people enjoy closure, so I thought it would be fun! I invented a new villain and a new ability and I found an excuse to drag some Guild members into it as well. Essentially, Ranpo reopens the case after the funeral and uses the strange behavior of Steinbeck to corner and catch the elusive ability user. I'm personally proud of the ability I created, so I'm going to keep it a secret for now.

📒*

Fandom: Toilet Bound Hanako-Kun

Ships: TeruKane (primary)

This one is actually based on a post that has since been deleted proposing the idea of a soulmate AU where the name of your soulmate is written on the inside of your book in the Four O'clock Library. I shook it up a bit and added the idea that if you read your soulmate's name, people will begin to forget they exist and you have to confess your love to them within a week or they will disappear from existence entirely. Akane didn't think it would be a problem to go and confirm his soulmate-- it's obviously Aoi-- only to discover a very different name written in his book. Knowing his time limit, he struggles to find a loophole in the curse that would help him avoid confessing a love he doesn't feel. In the meantime, people are slowly starting to forget who Teru Minamoto is, with Akane being the only one to remember, forcing them to spend even more time together. This one is going to have a happy ending, but it's going to be a really close call!

📔

Fandom: Robihachi

Ships: Robby/Hatchi (primary)

This is a sequel to Lovely that I've been playing around with. Someone expressed that they wanted to see how Robby's father would react to their situation and that got me thinking about it. In a misguided gesture of good faith, Hatchi's parents invite Robby's family up to the moon to help celebrate either his birthday or their first anniversary. Much to Robby's surprise, they agree to come, leaving him with an awkward mess of judgement to deal with until they leave. I still haven't decided how this will end, but I know it's going to be on either a positive or bittersweet note.

📘

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Ships: EraserMist (primary; may be romantic or platonic), Tomura/Touya (secondary)

Sequel to Purpose. Kurogiri and Tomura move in with that kind hero, Aizawa, after what happened in the alleyway. It takes a lot of getting used to, but it is leagues better than living out of a hotel. Kurogiri juggles working to obtain his hero license with raising Tomura (made easier with the new help) and investigates just why that hero seemed so familiar... Later on, when Tomura enters UA, he juggles making friends for the first time, proving his heroism despite his quirk, and a concerning new crush on the hot upperclassman.

📗

Fandom: Sk8 the Infinity

Ships: MatchaBlossom (primary), Renga (secondary), ShadOka (maybe)

This one is going to go through a week of after-hours visits at Sia la Luce. Each day, someone drops in while Joe is closing up, needing one thing or another. From relationship advice to a pleasant escape to pleas for forgiveness, Joe finds himself to be the center of all of their attention. It's just a collection of seven mini-stories that are all collected throughout the span of one week in-universe. Everyone is going to give Joe a visit for different reasons and I'm excited to see how it turns out!

📙*

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs

Ships: Shin Soukoku (primary), Soukoku (secondary), more potentially TBA

A fantasy AU in which Fukuzawa and Mori are the kings of two rival kingdoms, Ada and the Port Kingdom (I'll probably change the names lol). Fukuzawa has no genetic heirs, but he had taken in a number of wards, one of which will be chosen to succeed him. Mori has two children, and the prince was born with a terrible curse that leaves his reputation soaked in blood. Atsushi, one of Fukuzawa's wards, is also cursed and feels that Prince Ryuunosuke is just like him; that he can be saved with some kindness and compassion. Despite being warned not to, he sneaks out and attends a ball intended to find the prince a suitor. While there, he unknowingly defends the prince from a number of attackers, which, while unnecessary, piques Ryuunosuke's interest. The two run away together, but wind up being sidetracked by an advancing enemy and wind up lost. Chuuya, a knight from the PK, is sent by Mori to go and find his son. Dazai, Atsushi's mentor and ward of Fukuzawa, is sent to go and locate the weretiger after he does not come to breakfast in the morning. Chuuya and Dazai run into each other while searching for their respective people, which leads to them teaming up to find them while Atsushi and Ryuunosuke are trying their hardest not to be found.

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drangues · 3 years

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Trust me, I know, but trying to tell my anxiety to fuck off is: Hard. In other news, I’ve gone down a rabbit whole of desserts and sweet fruits and I desperately wanna try a mangosteen. Anyways, I’m glad you think Inari is a good name!!! I just wanted to name his dragon after a god like Atsushi’s (speaking of, Chuuya’s is definitely named Arahabaki and it is Angry, At All Times), and that Inari is the deity of rice just felt like a cute nod to Dazatsu, haha. (Nyanon, 1/6)

And Atsushi is just like: Being mothered by a cat who looks like a tiger isn’t how I expected to spend my teenage years but Here I Am. And his foster parents treating him more like a sibling or friend is kinda sad (give my boy parents!!!) but understandable, especially, since he’d probably be rather independent. Either way, it’s leagues better than the orphanage and he’s a great full little bean. Oh yeah no, Kouyou is definitely Sailor Pluto!!! (Nyanon, 2/6)

Which... Might make Kyouka Sailor Chibi Moon? Doesn’t Sailor Pluto also look after her??? And it’d give her a close relationship with Atsushi... Who she’d get along with more than Chibiusa gets along with Usagi, whoops. Inversely, she seems to love messing with Dazai. Speaking of, it’s good to know that he knew!!! I. Could not remember, but either way, it’d still be a cute dynamic he’d have with Atsushi. (Nyanon, 3/6)

As for the Soulmarks- The Headmaster would probably convince him they’re flukes, because he’s a Bastard. Or worse, he’d tell him he’s a thief who managed to steal the marks from their “rightful owners,” which would probably make Atsushi hide his marks and keep them a secret from the others in shame. Maybe that’s how the discover the abuse in this AU??? But anyways, have another (fluffy!) AU Concept: Atsushi becomes a gardener!!! Who specializes in edible food, like fruit trees. (Nyanon, 4/6)

Not a farmer, because he doesn’t raise animals (though I’d imagine they still love him, and his gardens are frequented by rare birds and butterflies and bees for pollination). I’d imagine that, instead of going to Yokohama from the orphanage, he goes out towards the countryside...? Maybe he meets Kenji’s family, and that’s how he gets invested in growing plants! And he still has his ability, but having a garden means having His Own Territory. (Nyanon, 5/6)

Which maybe makes the tiger calm down a bit by the time he figures it out? And maybe he meets the ADA because they have to go out that way for... Some reason. I’m not sure yet, but they Must Meet. Maybe Kenji just dragged them to visit his hometown. (Nyanon, 6/6)

KYOUKA AS CHIBIUSAAAA YEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I LOVE IT SO MUCH

and oof!!! the soulmark au where the headmaster says those lies make sense :OOO and then dazais distressed “atsushi it’s IMPOSSIBLE to steal somebodys soulmark oh my g o d hes so full of shit-”

ATSUSHI IS A GARDENER OEGEHJKSAJAKDS Y E S S S they would either meet with kenji visiting his hometown/kenji calling atsushi to visit him during the winter (cus then u dont have to Do much) and/or the ADA being on a mission in another city and like, stopping by the country side OR steering off the road to like lose their enemies and boom they run into atsushi

either way, everyone is Whipped and loves his amazing apple pies

#anon #ask #ask anon #anon ask #nyanon #nyatsuhi anon #bsd

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bungo-stray-dogs0 · 4 years

Text

Gone- BSD Dazai Fanfic

This contains some possibly triggering content to some people, especially those with suicidal idealization/depression. Please proceed at your own risk. This one is a bit shorter, but a fair bit darker. This is also based off a twitter AU I read somewhere, but I have no idea where it came from.

Gone. Everyone is gone. There is no one left, no one here for me. Dazai thought, slowly descending into grief.

“What am I supposed to do?” He laughed, trying to hide his choking sobs. Slowly but surely, they broke through. Dazai… broke. He fell to the hard concrete and began to sob. He just stayed there and sobbed.

He couldn’t do this. Not again, not ever. Everyone he ever loved, cared about, was gone. They left him here to rot all by himself. Dazai wiped the tears from his face. Slowly, he stood up. I can’t do this, it’s not what they had wanted, Dazai moved his lips to those words as if trying to convince himself. Atsushi, Akutagawa, Kunikida, Fukuzawa, Yasano, Chuuya, Tachihara, Kenji; they were all gone. There was nothing he could’ve done, and yet, he blamed himself. I could’ve stopped it, there was no reason for that to happen. The fire, the fight, I could’ve stopped. What the hell was I doing?! Laying in bed hungover?! That’s no excuse. I... I can’t. This life is too hard. Dazai slapped himself in the face.

“Nope, nope, nope. I need to stop saying that. It’s not what they have wanted. It wasn’t my fault. I couldn’t have done anything,” Dazai mumbled, stumbling around as if he was drunk. He may not have been drunk on liquor, but sometimes, grief can do the same thing. Dazai stopped for a moment and looked around. He was at the cemetery. This was a place of grief, and yet, there weren’t even any bodies to be buried. The sky was spotted with clouds, but just enough to keep the sun from beating down. The air was crisp and cool. The water was gently moving in the river, and everything was at peace. And yet, Dazai couldn’t stop. The pain, it just wouldn’t go away. The thoughts... were just there. Dazai shook his head and started walking down the water path.

Ah, what a nice river that is. The soft gurgling, the blue/green water, and the frigid temperature. What I would give to jump in there right now. Dazai thought, with a slight sigh.

Dazai continued walking and didn’t stop. He didn’t have a place to return to so it’s not like it mattered what was going to happen. Dazai stopped for a quick moment to look at the ruins of the ADA office. Everything was burned to ash. There weren’t even any remains of a person, let alone a memory.

Dazai, quickly and suddenly turned around. I have to go back! Now! I have to! I don’t have a choice. If I don’t do it now, I won’t have another chance. Dazai thought frantically. Dazai ran, and he ran. He ran as fast as a thin, grief-stricken man can go.

After about 13 minutes of running, Dazai made it back. The cemetery was looking at him, preparing to embrace him. He could feel the intensity of that look. Slowly, he walked over to Oda’s grave.

Dazai gave one final look at Oda’s grave. “Well, old friend. I’m coming. Don’t leave without me,” Dazai said, jokingly, and yet, on the verge of tears. Dazai walked over to the tree and sat down. Dazai sighed and pulled something out of his back pocket. A fairly large, and a sharp knife. This knife had been a gift from Atsushi. It was had a silver blade and a mahogany handle with black details. Atsushi said that blade had reminded him of Dazai, so he got it. It was an amazing day, full of love and laughter. Dazai smiled softly, at the thought.

“I’m coming,” Dazai whispered as he dragged the sharp blade across his forearm. Dazai sighed softly and looked up at the sky for one final time.

#dazai #bsd dazai #tw triggers #bungou stray dogs #fanfic #read at your own risk #character death

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daughterofsinsloth · 6 years

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I heard from a friend of mine that you are suggesting great fics of soukoku! Everyday I always go to AO3 and look for Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya tags to find interesting stories but recently I dont feel anymore of enthusiastic when I see updates, probably just stress from school. If its okay do you have any skk amazing fics that you like to recommend me or some you read?

hello anon-chan!! and hello to your friend too!than k you very much for your words! they makle m e really happy!

now! I kinda understand what you mean. maybe coz lately there are more angst fics? also school can be a major reason! i freak out a lot too! neh I will give you some fluuf and romantic or action fics so you can realx and forget all about school okay?

lets see!

first some great writers, that you will definatly enjoy, are:

ReaperStygian

setosdarkness

photography_tea

Memos

Witheryvine

Avi_pizzapopolis

AnonLearnsToWrite

Konoha79

sodenoshirayuki_23

izanyas

stargazerlilith

SoukokuParadise

hellosweetie17

gureshintrash

TheGreatCatsby

hybridempress

Lake_Toya

Kohaku69

okay now some am amazing fics that my heart always skip a beat reading them!

Mother by WhisperingWinds99:

a really heart warming fic! Kouyou narrate skk life and we see her mother sight! well written and overwelming emotions . one shot

Movie Nights and Lazy Mornings by evie_maria:

a cute little one shot abouot skk weekend! pure fluff and calm feelings.

Seven days to show you my love by holdinglucy:

It takes Dazai seven days to prove Chuuya he’s still his partner in the things that matter. one shot and absolutely lovely! Im jealous of chuuya here! its nice seeing Dazai as a caring boyfriend who tries to find happiness and Chuuya deserve some too.

Chuuya’s Secret by Anonymous:

Chuuya’s behavior has become strange lately, but Dazai, with his insight, is certain he can figure it out. a hilarrious fic! one shot and a fluffy one! its mpreg too and its funny seeing Dazai as these dork dads!

Fire in the Night by ChubbyHippo:

I love this one. its one shot and AU. brothel!Chuuya and solder!Dazai fell in love under the bright moon and my hearet stopped!its lovely, romantic,bit sad but overwelm ing and leaves you full.

Five more minutes by counter_illumination:

from morning to night their typical day. cute and fluffy.crak makes an apperance too coz we are talking about Dazai.a really nice feeling in it. one shot

Shared Gravity by writingfromtheshadows, ZODIACHUUYA:

mind the writes too. multi-chptrs. the writers take turns with the chptrs leaving no hoe init and giving you the emotions open to see. AU!high school and reallyyyyy good.The first time they slept together, Dazai and Chuuya were little more than academic rivals thrown together in a haze of dancing and alcohol.Every time after that, well, they just seemed to be drawn to each other. its an awesome fic

A Hearts Desire by Kaokita :

AU and multi-chptrs.Chuuya works in a brothel when he meets Dazai, a journalist. Dazai thinks he can save Chuuya but Chuuya doesn’t need saving. The one who needs saving is the one who longs for a reason to keep living. Chuuya and Dazai end up saving each other. this two are like magnets and when they connect they are explode. Chuuya thinks that they are different but they are not really. A+++ for Oda being alive.

Feel My Love by eunrihae:

multi-chptrs, one going, mpreg.they are just in love and noone thoought that Dazai was serious about Chuuya. but boy they are wrong. coz in the end of the day they will always be in love.

Five Times Dazai Didn’t Stay, and One Time He Did. by kidspawn02:

I honestly loe this one. its well written, well built and over welming. emotions bear for you to see and feel . it has smut b ut not graphic but its about Dazai and Chuuya don’t really know how to deal with sexual tension, and Chuuya doesn’t think it’s fair that he’s fallen in love and that Dazai leaves every time they share a bed. it hurts but the ending is perfect. one shot

Strangers and Painkillers by TheEnigmaticPhoenix:

thiiiiiiiis fic!!!!! best absolute perfect! fluff and light angst but its great! Chuuya has no right as a stranger to make assumptions that the man sitting in front of him is hurting more than he is, despite the huge bloody gash running down the length of Chuuya’s arm.So, in an attempt to become less of a stranger, Chuuya lets the man drag him to the hospital to get his arm treated, hoping that he’ll answer Chuuya’s questions.What Chuuya doesn’t realize is that it’s not that easy to get a certain Dazai Osamu to open up. (part of series)

(i believe) i think i said goodbye to my soul tonight by iskendaris:

this one has smut but I choose it for what it represent. the raw emotions and the writting just bring to light words and promises long buried and very much needed by afraid to be said. true emotions that no one wanted to say but they are not bad and its great how the writer portain them. Dazai OP is “This isn’t sex as much as its an interrogation. Whatever Chuuya wants from him, he doesn’t know why but he knows he can trust Chuuya not to fuck him up.Or rather, he knows why, but he doesn’t think about it too much about baseless trust issues, because therein lies hell and damnation.” and its nice seeing through him

Temporarily by prettypurplegirl08:

cutness overload and a very much needed happiness.multi-chptrs and you dont want it to end.In Dazai’s arms was a small child–Chuuya would guess he was probably around 3 or 4 years old–with, surprisingly, silver white hair staring at Chuuya with those wide purple-yellow mixture orbs of his. The little kid was only wearing an over-size white shirt–well it’s definitely oversized for the small kid. Chuuya fell silent as his gaze never left the child who was thumbsucking in Dazai’s arms, part of his brain trying to figure out where he had seen the kid and another part trying to fathom why Dazai had come to his apartment with him in the first place.//or Atsushi gets turned into a child and Chuuya and Dazai has tot ake care of him, Akutagawa is somehow involved?

I’ll Hold You Close, and Half of Us Closer by doubleblack :

multi-chptrs, on going, mpreg. a lovelly fic. a very needed fluff. “This is the baby.” The doctor smiled. “They look like a little spot right now since you’re not far along. And that is their very strong heartbeat.“Chuuya and Dazai smiled as they looked at the ultrasound of their baby. The doctor printed out the ultrasounds of their baby. She prescribed Chuuya prenatal vitamins, told him he was 10 weeks along, and that he would be due early December. Chuuya and Dazai were now on their way home, and Dazai held Chuuya’s hand as he was driving home.“If Mori finds out…”“He won’t.” Dazai stated. “And even if he did. I will not let anyone hurt you or our baby. Ever. I will destroy the whole Port Mafia before I ever let that happen.” its cuuuuuute. its a journey that i would love to see.

Lips by SilentSoukoku:

cut and unexpected! “My dearest Chuuya, do you even take care of your lips? Look at how cracked they are!” did you died yet? coz I did! one shot

Waste of Bandage’s by ChuuChan1994:

hilarious, cute, amazing! one shot. Chuuya is getting along better with the ADA, that still doesn’t mean he’s willing to put up with Dazai’s bullshit. Where Akutagawa was use to the sight, Atsushi was left gaping at the sight before him.

Just like we agreed by codenamecat:

I will say on thing : Yosano is a b adass Goddnes. thats all. one shot and smut sorry but its funny and fluffy too. “I’ve been giving you excuses to leave since the very beginning, why won’t you just do what we’re both waiting for and take your gross ass away from here?!”Dazai tilted his head, his expression suggesting that he suddenly forgot his mother tongue and didn’t understand a word of what Chuuya just said.“Who said that it’s what I want?”

bounded by fate by Nekito :

super interesting multi-chptrs, AU!!! kouyou never took chuuya in and chuuya never joins the mafia, thus never meeting dazai when they were kids; instead chuuya lives 22 years a normal life until he mets dazai; dazai’s connections with the port mafia however soon causes problems on going.

Without Gods, Without Guidance by dancing_dazai :

another super interesting AU but with Gods! niiice and very promising!Without gods, without guidance, By the window, a woman has passed on; the white sky is blind, the white wind is cold.-The Hour of Death, Chuuya NakaharaTwo lost souls find their way to Quindecim with no memories of who they are or how they got there, and they’re determined to get their lives back. No matter the cost. multi-chptrs and on going

centrifugal/centripetal by TopHat69 :

my absolute favorite! majestic, powerful, overwelming, lovelu, lovely fic! multi-shptrs, omegaverse, on going their story from the begging but they are true mates. problem is that its more than they can handle. it what they need but Chuuya is not good at this and Dazai is too afraid. Chuuya wants to learn, to reach Dazai and Dazai want to be free and filfull a promise.

Cover Up by Satquael:

one shot and beautiful! It wasn’t long after they’d first met that Dazai noticed the tattoo. It was on the back of his neck, a bunch of letters and numbers that didn’t make any real sense. A serial number, of sorts.Chuuya had tried to hide it, understandably. Under his clothes, and then makeup. These solutions didn’t really work. Not in the long term, anyway. Clothes shifted, and makeup rubbed off.Dazai had a better idea.

lastly, will be too bad of me to share my works? I think that you may mostly like this fic:

Can you sew my suit? : Akutagawa and Atsushi are getting married and who is a better person to be their best man, but Dazai Osamu? Unfortunally, all guests has to wear newly sew suits, but Dazai missed the deadline for the order!Now, eight days before the wedding, Akutagawa sends Dazai to his last resolt; his good friend’s tailor shop, Nakahara Chuuya.However, his Dazai’s suit will not be the only thing fixed.Ch1.: the prologueCh2.: the meetingCh3.: a bonus

aaaaaaaaaand thats some of my favorite and amazinf fics i LOVE! hope you like them and happy reading! tell me what you think okay?

be well! :)

have a nice day!!!

#bungou stray dogs #soukoku #fic rec #highly recommended

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