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#crack bible ships
bloodkrieg21 · 2 months
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Number 5
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dvd-play3r · 5 months
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can’t wait to see all the todd ingram x wallace wells doomed yaoi angst start to show up in edits, fanart, and fanfiction on ao3
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imsmolbandtrash · 2 years
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Vegas: *jumps on the bed next to Pete*
Vegas: Once again, fate brings us together
Pete: We’ve been married for 3 years, this is our bedroom
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fanfictionroxs · 2 years
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*Porsche and Pete sharing a bed, trying to kiss*
Vegas: Wait that's illegal
Porsche: hOmiesexual 😁
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sins-spookyboogie · 2 years
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I don't need vitamins when I can just take them .
So whatever it is they got I want it.
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My ghost ship is seeming a bit too real.
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albondiguilla007 · 28 days
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Tomarry recs Part l
Soooo, for the Tomarry girlies, hope this reaches you. Here are some recommendations of the pair. You should know that all of these have something in common though, aside from being my favorites. These are TOMARRY fanfictions, meaning Harry x Tom Riddle, not Harry x Voldemort. (So, most of them time travel)
I feel more comfortable with this ship, and I’ve found that it tends to be less toxic, (though not always). Another thing, most of them put both Harry and Tom in equal footing, meaning, no abuse or manipulation (tho Tom certainly tries), or just any funny business.
If there is anything I love about these fics is how Harry confronts Tom in all of them, questioning his beliefs and social standing by just being good ole Harry. Sassy, magically powerful and impulsive Harry. So yeah, srry for that Bible. Enjoy!
- [ ] Wear Me Like a Locket Around My Throat: Technically incomplete, but it’s basically a second part. The main arch wraps up very nicely, so I’d count it as complete. The secondary characters are amazing, I fell in love with all of them. I don’t why, but Hogwarts feels pretty nostalgic in this one. 220k https://archiveofourown.org/works/7189349/chapters/16316573
- [ ] Terrible, but Great: Incomplete, still updating. The author has already written most of the second Arch. Tom reaaaallyyy wants Harry to submit and follow the Slytherin hierarchy. Harry won’t. They have the most epic confrontations. 173k https://archiveofourown.org/works/35714410/chapters/89052469
- [ ] Of Kings, of Pawns, and of Men: Incomplete: This one is addictive, I’m telling ya. I couldn’t stop reading. Not time travel per se, but still amazing. A tiny bit of Drarry. Harry befriends the Slytherins (Blaise, Pansy, etc) Tom is OBSESSED with Harry, like absolutely crazy about him. 146k https://archiveofourown.org/works/8323864/chapters/19063957
- [ ] you belong to me (i belong to you): Incomplete: Auror absolute boss bitch Harry. He reincarnates in another boy. Sort of? He catches everyone’s attention (Tom’s) when he starts acting differently (confident, powerful, won’t take shit from anyone) than he did before. 112k https://archiveofourown.org/works/11270490/chapters/25203408
- [ ] Earning his notice: Complete: This one is very short, but I feel like it sums up all my favorite tropes. Definitely give it a try. So my boy travels back to Hogwarts, is sorted into Hufflepuff, manages to fly under the radar during his school years and starts working on a shady business on Knockturn Alley. Everything is fine until his shop is attacked by Death Eaters, and ✨surprise✨he earns Tom’s attention. 40k https://archiveofourown.org/series/1174940
- [ ] At the end of every road: Complete: Crack treated seriously. Fluff, sassy Harry. Tom courts Harry, they get engaged. Sort of. Harry becomes a professional Quidditch player. 90k https://archiveofourown.org/works/46642903/chapters/117465823
- [ ] What Souls are Made of: Complete: My two fav things: Golden Trio friendship + Tomarry (Ron and Hermione travel back in time with him) 277k https://archiveofourown.org/works/35109247/chapters/87462256
- [ ] Stab right through: Incomplete: Snarky Harry, I love him. He gets sorted in Ravenclaw (Harry is equally as confused) Tom is intrigued. 80k https://archiveofourown.org/works/12051324/chapters/27288978
more recommendations here: Part ll
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katakaluptastrophy · 2 months
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Instantiating the Trinity and the Second Resurrection.
I have spent way too long wondering what on earth was going on here:
G— on his way with the nuke. The ships on the launchpad, twenty hours to go now, less. So much waiting around. Me in my bedroom with a nun and a migraine, her thinking that if she pushed me enough we’d instantiate the Trinity and we’d all be saved. Everyone else drinking.
What on earth does "instantiate the Trinity" mean? What did the nun think she was doing? What did she think John was?
This happens in John 1:20. What is John 1:20 in the Bible?
And he confessed, and denied not; but confessed, I am not the Christ.
It's where John the Baptist is asked if he is the messiah and says that he is not.
But what other role does John the Baptist play in the Bible? As his name might suggest, he baptises. He baptises lots of people, but specifically, he baptises Jesus.
But before he does that, he's out in the wilderness prophesying the end of the world: he warns people of "the wrath to come" and criticises the corrupt authorities and those hoarding wealth and resources. He gets into some trouble with the authorities. All themes that either have or are about to become very pressing in John 1:20...
And then Jesus comes along to be baptised:
In those days Jesus came from Nazareth of Galilee and was baptized by John in the Jordan. And when he came up out of the water, immediately he saw the heavens being torn open and the Spirit descending on him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.” (Mark 1:9-11)
After all his prophesying and calling people to repentence, John the Baptist does something very specific. And suddenly God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are all seen together. The gospel passages describing Jesus' baptism by John are some of the key texts that underpin the Christian theology of the Trinity.
The nun has watched John warn people of the doom to come, criticise those who ignore those warnings and value wealth and power. She has watched him perform miracles. And as the clock ticks closer, she is waiting for his moment.
Just as John the Baptist proclaimed the beginning of Jesus' ministry, his actions tearing the heavens open and revealing the truth of God, does the nun expect some climactic action from John to reveal God at the end of days? The book of Revelation too describes heaven as standing open and the figures of the Trinity in action as the end of the world begins.
The nun thought John was a prophet whose decisive action would herald this opening of heaven, the revelation of God, and the end of the world.
When John says she thought "we'd all be saved", that doesn't mean global warming would be fixed, everything would go back to normal, and John and the gang would get tenure and posters of their faces. It means they would all be Saved. The world would end and they, followers of the prophet of the apocalypse, would be amongst "the blessed and holy who share in the first resurrection. The second death has no power over them, but they will be priests of God and of Christ and will reign with him for a thousand years." (Rev 20:6)
This might be starting to sound familiar. Abigail Pent talks about the horrors of a second death. John describes how he picked a worthy few to resurrect and be his followers...
John, of course, was not a prophet. He did not crack open heaven and instantiate the Trinity. He did not usher in the Kingdom of God. He did fundamentally fuck up the boundaries of metaphysics, declare himself god, and then proceed to badly plagiarise the Book of Revelation.
Because what happens next in the Bible may again sound familiar... After that thousand year reign, the Devil is released from prison. There's a final battle. And then, there's the second resurrection:
The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what they had done. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. (Rev 20:13)
Waiting in death, in the sea or in the underworld until a second resurrection and judgement - where have we heard that before?
Magnus coughed in a genteel Fifth House way, and said, “Who wait for our Lord’s touch on the day of a second Resurrection.”
Although Abigail Pent suspects the metaphysical reality is rather different, this is the eschatology of the Houses: the world ended and the righteous dead were raised by god and they and their descendants live in his myriadic reign. And when that reign ends, he will raise the ancient dead who were not included in that first resurrection and those who wait in the River in a second Resurrection.
What happens after that? In the Bible, the world is destroyed and remade:
Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. (Rev 20:11)
We don't know what the Houses believe will happen at the second Resurrection. We don't know for sure what John is planning. But in light of Revelation, I do wonder about the poem at the start of NTN:
Let’s put this first-draft dream of mine to bed.
In the appointed hour
I’ll pull up your sheets. I’ll kill the light,
Lie down beside you; die; and sleep the night.
This time will be the time we get it right:
Forgiveness not so hard, nor anger long;
Our graves will be less deep, our lies less true.
You held aloft the sword. I still love y-
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purplink8 · 5 months
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Can I be real for a second? I don't think L giving a foot massage to Light was very in-character of him. Like manga!L would've totally scoffed at how pathetic anime!L appeared when he did that.
I like the rain scene bc it's really pretty (also Light MOANS bc of L? *sighs* yeah i ship lawlight) but I'm always so ?? at anime!L's behavior? The anime made L way too melancholic and y'know self-deprecating kinda guy. In contrast, manga!L (whom I love to death) is so so confident in doing what he's doing and has the time of his life during the Kira case as he's intellectually challenged (by Light) as he figures out the case little by little.
I don't get where the anime creators got the idea that L is a very sad character who cares about justice so much so that he's actually Justice itself? Manga!L enjoys solving cases. I'm not saying that L doesn't care about justice at all- just that he cares more about winning.
So, the anime creators looked at a character who cares about winning (& his own ego) than everything else and decided to... make him give a foot massage to his nemesis (surprise surprise bible symbolism featuring L as Jesus *🤮* coming up) apparently due to accepting Light's (boy's first debut as Judas) 'betrayal' how can there be betrayal when there was no trust between them in the first place and saying "It is the least I can do to atone for my sins"...
The only way I could've made a little sense of this is if L was mocking Kira with that line but the anime just had to go above & beyond to make it (L's actions) seem too genuine for that to be true. which is. so. FRUSTRATING
Manga!L wouldn't have done anything like that. Not even ironically (he'd have thought it to be below him for pretending to be accepting his defeat mockingly to Kira). Even Manga!L's not enough of a bastard to try to compare himself with Jesus (and just after knowing (god knows how) that he's going to die)- like that's too stupid omg: even for a mockery.
Does he actually think that Light would pick up on the (him as Jesus) symbolism and be like 'oh no! L is too noble like Jesus to die by my betrayal i'm such a bad judas how come i NEVER NOTICED THIS BEFORE'... and decide to spare L's life? Or embrace his inner Judas like the bad bitch he is and finish L for that godawful mockery of Jesus?
Whenever I think about Anime!Light's in-character reaction I crack up as it would be smth like 'wow this guy who graduated summa cum laude from torture university is pretending to be Jesus? lol what a real piece of work. would've expected better from you L: so pathetic lmao i hope rem kills you soon i'm so done with you rn- rip 💀'
Manga!L (if he knew he were going to die (don't know how that's possible in the anime; still we're talking about how the anime creators seem to see L as Jesus so ~anything is possible~) that is) would never go 'guess i'll die' accept his defeat offering a foot massage to his enemy and inwardly throw a pity party being all "… It'll be lonely, won't it?" GIRL you were the one going on & about how you'd EXECUTE Kira once you catch him on live tv (also saying that you'd bring Kira's head to the task force) I REALLY doubt you'd feel lonely if either one of you were to die- that (killing each other) was the point!!
Manga!L is a selfish character: he values his victory above all else so the anime making him accept defeat that easily + gracefully doesn't sit well with me.
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evilkaeya · 2 months
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...
Jesusdor but their first time eating together or date ig? so to speak is them breaking and multiplying the bread and fish. I'm sorryhsjhjsbsj
guys don't do this don't make me read the bible for this crack ship
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mrs-monaghan · 10 months
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i’m just saying but your “proof” of them being together is normal stuff friends do who are extremely close. i’ve done it with my best friends throughout my life. and i think you really should respect the fact they have all said they get uncomfortable when being shipped with their friends. plus aren’t you setting yourself for disappointment when they come out and they’re not together?
24th July 2023. All these years later and people like you still exist? Still sending questions like these?
and I think you really should respect the fact that they have all said that they get uncomfortable when being shipped with their friends
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I guess we are, aren't we? Fine. Let's do this. Before we begin, please note that ONLY 2 MEMBERS have only ever addressed their shippers. Two. Not ALL. Idk who lied to u and told u they have ALL told people to stop shipping them. Shipping has been a culture in Kpop since time immemorial. It's literally part of their training. That's why they do fanservice, dum dum. V and Suga are the only two members who have ever shut down their shippers. V for Taekook and Suga for... what do you call Suga and RM together? Sugamon? Namga? Namyoon? Whatever tf their ship name is, I have no idea.
Anyway, let's jump into it. Bon Voyage season 3 episode 2.
One very important thing to note; Jimin understood the waiter perfectly. First, the waiter asked how many of them there were.
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JK replied by asking for the menu
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But Jimin replied; they wanted a table for 2
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Second, waiter saw all the staff recording them and asked Jikook if they were camera men. Jimin for some reason said yes 😂😂
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Again, JK did not understand and Jimin had to translate
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So just so it's clear, Jimin understood that waiter very well. With that in mind, let's proceed.
So they go to order and JK with his limp wrist (bless him) drops his iconic "together bam"
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The waiter points at them both and says "together? Alright."
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Some people hear; "you're together?" And others just hear "together" anyway. It doesn't matter. If you watch the clip here you will see the waiter clearly gestures to both of them and says that. He's understood they're a couple which is why Jimin cracks up.
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We have established Jimin was getting everything and he understood what the waiter meant but guess what, anon? He didn't correct him. Even if his English was quite bad at this time he knew how to say "no" but chose not to. Instead he just laughed it off. So, Jimin had a chance to shut down a Jikook rumor but... 🤷🏽‍♀️
People still thought the waiter didn't think they were a couple until an Army visited that restaurant and confirmed that was the case.
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Remember when Jin asked them if they were a couple and again they just laughed it off?
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Remember when RM asked if they were a couple since they were matching like a couple? Remember how once again Jikook could have denied this but didn't?
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How strange anon. All these chances to shut down shippers and still they refuse to take them.
Jimin actually mumbles something after RM asks that but it doesn't get translated and even Kjikookers have admitted they can't hear it clearly. But I have heard a few say it sounds like Jimin said "we're married."
But since its not very clear, we don't go around celebrating and spreading it. Still... 😌😌
I am so confused as to where you heard that Jikook shut down their shippers. When did this happen, I wonder? Was it when JK had Jimin's ear in his mouth? Was it everytime Jimin tried to kiss JK? Or was it when they both admitted Jimin sucked on JK's neck long enough to leave a bruise aka hickey?
I've done it with my best friends through out my life.
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Now anon listen, I dont judge people. Trust me, not only because the Bible says thou shall not judge, but also because I've had my fair share of slutty moments. So I will not sit here and judge you for sucking on all your bestfriends' necks and leaving bruises. How do their lovers feel about this, btw? I won't judge you if you get the urge to caress your bestfriend's balls just because. And I definitely won't judge you because you like to footsie your friends' dicks. All I can tell u is u need to be careful because it could get messy real quick. Because if someone did this to me it means they want to fuck me. And that messes with the friendship dynamic.
Idk what brought you to my blog. But I'd advice you to know your shit before you come my way next time. Have a good day and God Bless 🙏🏽
Bonus for my fellow Jikookers; Malta Jikook looking at eo. And JK is most definitely obsessed with those bratz lips 💋
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justadeadreaper · 6 months
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WARNING THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR CALL OF DUTY MODERN WARFARE THREE.
PLEASE IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SPOILT PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE READING. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
I was thinking about the ending scene for Modern Warfare Three as it has been rupturing my soul into enough shards that the grains of sand in the Sahara Desert look like an hourglass compared to it.
Now this is my headcanon from being a Ghost X Soap shipper so if this is not for you please do not continue reading but instead scroll away as I will not accept hate just because you disagree with my idea due to the ship I like. Just please ignore and move along so you can spend your energy doing something better than arguing with me over text over fictional characters.
This headcanon is my idea on why the task force had Soap's ashes instead of his family as it is mixed in with a heavy amount of angst.
My reason for believing why Soap's ashes were not given to his biological family is because I believe that Soap doesn't technically have one a family. You may be wondering why I say this as most of you know the fandom headcanon Soap to have a large and loving family. While I may agree with that, today I want to give you a taste of angst that you'll see in my later works and also because I believe he only has a family like that when he fits into the box.
I've always believed that Soap is the fourth of six children which includes three other brothers and two sisters. From a young age Soap was a trouble maker but also the loudest of his family who had some queer tendencies which somewhat made him a black sheep. To counteract this I suggest that Soap's father or grandfather would punish him with corporal punishments that ranged from spankings to cleaning the house house to the point of spotlessness otherwise he'd get more spankings.
This is relevant as it gives you a bit of context as to how I view his family as I believe that the new Soap is Roman Catholic as the original Soap before the reboot was also a Roman Catholic. Which makes me guess that his family would most likely be traditional, especially his parents depending on their age as I expect them to be a bit older due to the amount of kids they have.
Coming from a family that's a mixture of Christianity and going to a Roman Catholic school I can say that traditional Roman Catholics tend to be homophobic due to the bible and believing it is unnatural as it apparently makes men "sissies" or "puffy". A lot of people will not like this as they headcanon Soap's family to be accepting but based on my own experience I believe that it's the opposite. Especially due to his parents being older they would have been raised with many misconceptions and stereotypes around gay people which makes them view it as horrid to be gay and as if it's the worst sin in the world.
This all cumulated when Soap was in his late teens. One of his cousins or siblings discovered he was bisexual or gay due to snooping in his room and finding something they weren't supposed to. Due to having a grudge against Soap for one of his pranks they decided to tell everyone.
This went over as well as it could have gone.At first they tried the pray the gay away, just by themselves but then with the pastor, and toughen him up, which was mostly punishments, approach before finding landing on the easiest option of shaming and degrading Soap until he cracked under the pressure. Of course Soap was still gay but stayed in the closet until someone realised that it didn't work. After that realisation he was kicked out and disowned.
Due to how close he originally was with his family he wanted to get back into their good graces. This is why I think he originally joined the military to make them proud as I believe he had other family members in the military, and to show that he isn't a "stereotypical" gay guy which they think is a "sissy". He wanted to desperately show that he can still be masculine and the "Johnny" they knew but they continued to turn a blind eye due to their strong religious beliefs and act as if he never existed.
The disownment led to him having a living biological family but no actual family. Of course he made family in his time in the military through meeting others which became most apparent when he joined the task force.
Each task force member was given a role by Soap based on who they were most similar to from his own family: Price as the older brother or father, Nikolai as the sketchy uncle or sketchy father, Laswell as the distant but caring and helpful aunt, Gaz as either the younger or older brother, and finally Ghost who was seen as the lover but also as the person Soap wanted to become. After all to Soap, Ghost is perfect, what his family would have wanted in a son; he wanted to be like Ghost to feel his family's love again as he didn't truly realise that he had already made a new one.
Johnny was nobody's son. Only Soap was.
Which is why they had his ashes as they were the only ones he could consider family as they were all he had.
All he requested for when he died was for his ashes to be spread in the Highlands of his home where his father always promised to take him but never did.
Now Johnny is nobody's son and nobody's lover.
Now Soap is nobody's son and nobody's lover.
His family will die and forget about him. His taskforce will die in effort to enact revenge for him. All that will be left of him will be a fading memory that slowly blows away like his ashes in the wind.
No family.
No name.
No life.
Johnny may have died when his family threw him out to the streets. But Johnny and Soap truly died on that cold floor, unbeknownst to him that three others died with him that day, especially the one he cared about most.
Simon.
Who would have guessed a life would have been lost over love?
-This is Ozzie signing out, and I hope one day that Soap gets the revenge and true ending he deserves.
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imsmolbandtrash · 2 years
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Vegas: Love is a weakness. An evolutionary mistake.
Macau: You're literally making Pete a valentine's card right now.
Vegas: *points hot glue gun at Macau* You're on thin fucking ice, brother.
Vegas: Now pass me the heart stickers.
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kiisaes · 1 year
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Hey, i’d like to hear some of your bakudeku/katsudeku headcannons since i saw some and they’re so cute😭💞i love your art so much, it’s amazingg keep it up!!
ty !!! 🙏
I'll be honest I don't really have any headcanons off the top of my head. I have to think really hard about those I like but usually I can point at a preexisting one and go "haha yes I like this one" without thinking of it myself =v=
I think my biggest hc rn - and it's kind of controversial bc ik ppl have different opinions on it - is that deku is just flat out gay. like that's his sexuality, he only likes men. I used to hc him as bi and I campaigned pretty hard for it, and regarding fandom ships I still don't mind shipping him with girls. (tbh with fandom ships, I kind of just disregard a character's sexuality hc entirely bc I'm a multishipper who thinks crack ships are fucking great.)
but vibe wise, as well as putting canon into perspective, he just feels so gay to me. he screams comphet. he's got some vague internalized homophobia where he's totally supportive if u're gay, but HE'S not gay. and there's no way he can be even though he very well could be. like just think about it. he was really only so shy and nervous around girls bc he's literally never interacted with one casually before high school. and after he got close to 1A and could, you know, talk to women, he lost any deeper attraction in them. literally what happened with him and ochako. that's just how I feel anyway, but he won't admit his natural drift towards men (bkg) and his emotional hangups on men (bkg). he hangs out with men (bkg) way too much for him to have any serious interest in women imo
anyway this is just my take, you can hc deku as whatever sexuality you want!!! I still think bi deku has so much flavor like yass be the disaster bi u were meant to be!!! but gay deku just speaks more to me nowadays, I guess
ok upon thinking long and hard, I have come up with these silly hcs as well:
they are both bad at verbalizing their feelings. dk is overall horrible with emotions that pertain to himself so he just doesn't dwell on his very obvious crush on bkg. he just thinks that it's normal to be obsessed with another man. like lol hes been doing it since he was a baby. it's not anything more. he is NOT gay. straight men can appreciate everything about another man and more! just bestie things! and bkg has accepted in his heart that he is gay for dk but u are NOT going to hear him say it. sorry but that man does not know how to even start a convo about this. he'd probably want to, but knows he'd fuck it up and dk would miss the point. he'd probably just tell dk to fight him and then make out somewhere down the line bc it's easier and less embarrassing to him. little does he know, HE'S embarrassing and I hate him.
so u know the whole "bkg is an early bird and dk is a night owl" hc? and how it's technically canonically wrong? yeah. I'm obsessed with how wrong it is. bkg going to bed early and waking up late is so real of him. he just really fucking loves to sleep, and dk is the exact opposite. man goes to bed late and wakes up at 5 in the morning. he gets like 3 hours of sleep maximum and he's functioning perfectly. god I wish I were him
that one adhd vs autism meme but it's bkdk. u get to choose which ones which. maybe they're both
dk has dimples, one on each cheek! maybe bkg has one too. who knows
this is one I just thought of right now but it's like. part of the fandom bible that bkg can cook and dk cannot. however. I think dk can cook ok - fine enough to sustain himself - but bake REALLY WELL. bkg can cook bc he's "a natural" who can easily figure out exactly how to cook and spice foods. he doesnt need to follow a recipe to a T, he can just figure it out himself. dk can bake bc I'd imagine baking, with their meticulous recipe requirements, are easier to comprehend for him. he takes a shitton of notes on the daily, u can't tell me he'll eagerly read and jot down shit so his pastries turn out well. he'd prefer following step by step than winging it. does this make sense. words are hard
I always like drawing bkdk pretty close in height. ik lots of bkdks like a height difference but I prefer when rivals are pretty equal, and that includes how tall they are
dk's hands are coarser than bkg's, except around the palms, where bkg canonically has thick skin (so I'd assume there's some callouses there)
I like to think that bkg is good at basically anything, considering how he's a perfectionist. give him something to do and one week to do it, and he'll have a new skill under his belt. but there's a few things he can't do that trip him up so bad and make him so angry. like to me he definitely doesn't know how to whistle or roll his Rs. he just physically cannot. they're such pointless abilities but he hates how he can't do them. especially bc dk can definitely do both
dk keeps calling bkg "kacchan" bc it reminds him of a simpler time :') it makes him feel more connected to bkg than he initially is, and tacitly tells the class that he knows bkg best. also bc bkg never told him to stop so like ... why should he stop now. lol. and ALSO bc he's waiting to see how far he can go before bkg snaps. little does he know, bkg never snaps about "kacchan" bc that's dk's name for him. it reminds him that dk is always there, always calling out for him. and recently, it's a reassurance that he's still here, against all odds
ending this list with a classic but dk's favorite food is katsudon bc it reminds him of kacchan's name (KATSUdon vs KATSUki)
hope this is a good enough hc list anon!
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thetoaddaddy · 2 months
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A funny little thing about fandom and fandom spaces. Especially if you are new to these spaces:
I got a friend who is fairly new to fandom spaces. She sends me screenshots sometimes of people in her fandom like being dramatic about shit and I’m not really phased by it cuz I’ve been in fandom spaces since I was like 12.
I gotta school her and tell her all these fandom lores. Like the fact Lord of the Rings had a gay fanfiction cult that scammed people out of money with promising amazing meet ups and were lack lustre, including flying out jed brophy and having his partner having to sob confess to him that she didn’t have enough money to fly them back home and they met Sean Astin several times for charity events and even got him to make the proposal between the cult leader and his main victim/“partner”.
Or that one time in the Hamilton fandom with that one white chick who pretended to be a woman of colour who had aids via sex trafficking but was in fact a white girl with a normal middle class upbringing. All to validate her fanfic about the aids crisis in the 80s with an age gap ship. Which she had no reason to do, like girl made a problem about nothing. And used this marginalized voice she crafted to scam money from people with sickbaiting. But the story then got watered down to the girl who exposed her did so cuz of a rival Hamilton mermaid cannibal crack ship… and then the call out poster then doxxed the scammer after promising not to. Honestly, what a damn mess that was.
The mass shipping wars between harry/ginny traditionalists vs the unhinged proshippers on the other side who shipped anything and everything(which is whatever i’m more proship at the end of the day its just fictional characters and they’re tagged properly, if you interact with it that’s on you). They fr had turf wars and an exchange of harassment(not to mention mrs scribe and her socks). Hello Draco’s Leather Pants I see you. Or the Snape Wives who astral projected sex with Snape via their husbands.
That bible self insert fanfiction writer who went to hell and back to try and claim they wrote my immortal. But he was bad at covering his trail, claimed this multiple times, tried to (shocker) get money and fame from this.
The sonic fandom in its god damn hayday was on a whole different level of insane. The ocs the edits the tracing. In general most spaces were toxic.
Clown meat fandom.
Or when Naruto fans harassed and sent death threats relentlessly to kishi for not making their ships canon at the end of the Naruto manga. We’ve seen things. We have lived through scammers, freaks, and extremists. There always will be in fandom.
I think whining about people who take their favourite character too seriously is not really looking at the full picture of what raving fans will do. Especially in young fandoms. Fanatic people have and always will act the fuck up. They’re the loudest of their fandom usually. But they don’t define their community as a whole. Just let them be. Nothing you can say will change them. They gotta go through the ravenous phases of fandom themselves. Then they become fandom elders like I… Like most of us are. We like what we like. We get friends from it. We make new headcanons and expand upon the blanks the canon materials left out. The ravenous do this too but they tend to have a sort of tunnel vision.
Regardless I don’t think antagonizing them is the right call. Fandom will always fandom. I think it’s just the natural life cycle of the fandom space. We’re all cringe. Ain’t none of us better than anyone else.
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davidfarland · 3 months
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David Farland’s Writing Tips—Giving Readers Hope
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Nearly every novel shows a character with a big conflict. Sometimes conflicts are so vast that the tale is overwhelming.
But readers must somehow muddle through those tough times, and what is going on in the reader’s life will affect how much they can handle in a novel. Is your reader’s mother dying from cancer? Did they put a beloved pet down this week?  Is the reader out of a job? Those kinds of losses can make reading the dark passages of a novel difficult.
I saw a good illustration of this a few years ago.  A woman who had gone through a divorce wrote a beautiful passage about the challenges her character was facing as she was dumped by her husband. Many of the class members loved it and found it so affecting that they broke into spontaneous applause—but two of the women were so devastated by the passage that they fled the room in tears. Both women had recently been through divorces.
Obviously, as writers we want to touch our readers deeply. We want to hold them through our books, even during the dark passages.  How can we do this?  Here are a few thoughts…
Heroism is a family trait. In ancient Greek theater, to be a hero you had to have heroic parents. In other words, the royals had trained the peasants properly by saying, “Not just anyone can do this.” But the trick still works today. This was handled nicely in J.J. Abram’s 2009 movie “Star Trek”. When a young Captain Kirk has his ship attacked by an angry Romulan, he heroically fights off his attackers just long enough so that his young wife and child can escape the ship, and then our hero gets blown up. Of course, the baby—James T. Kirk—is the one who returns and avenges the father some 25 years later.
Sure, the formula may be 3000 years old, but it still works.
The secret power. Does your character have a unique ability—Zorro’s mastery of swordplay, young Sheldon’s sharp wit, or Rocky Balboa’s ability to take a blow? Show it early in your story, and that will give the reader hope.
Borrowed glory. When young King Henry’s troops despair in Shakespeare’s “King Henry V,” he rouses them with a classic speech. Similarly, when Frodo Baggins is unable to go on seeking the Crack of Doom, his friend Sam Gamgee offers more private support.
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If you have a character who must struggle, perhaps you can give them a support system—a father, mother, lover, friend, teacher, or priest—who provides an example of how to hold on to hope in dark times. Even teachings from the Bible, Muhammad, or some other source can help.
The early win. Your character is allowed to have victories, and even the smallest victory may signal hope. Let’s say you’ve got a character who is struggling to find a killer, but is coming up stumped. On a side note, for month’s she’s been trying to figure out how a mouse has been getting into her kitchen—and suddenly she discovers a tiny hole under the sink. Yeah, the mouse problem isn’t going to help her dodge bullets, but it does show that she has a fine mind and potential.
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Light in dark times. Many heroes cling to a hope or a dream throughout their entire story. Maybe they dream of someday owning a fishing boat or a restaurant, but often hope comes in the form of “fairy gifts,” any gift given in dark times.
Lady Galadriel gave Frodo a vial of starlight to help him through dark times, for example. This “fairy gift” is very important in fantasy literature. It’s often an object—a sword, a ring, or other item that gives its wielder a bit of help. But I like Frodo’s light. He doesn’t pull it out and look at it often, but in a sense he does. Just before he travels into Mordor, he looks up and sees a star shining above the darkness. That moment of hope is one highpoint in the novel.
We see similar scenes over and over in Lord of the Rings as the hobbits meet up with unexpected friends or have a quiet meal. Each of those reinvigorates their spirit.
Indeed, there is one scene in the Two Towers where Gollum argues with himself about whether or not he should strangle the “nice hobbits” and take the ring—a scene where even an enemy shows the potential to become a friend.
But a fairy gift can be anything.  It might be a $100 bill that dad gave his daughter before he was killed in a car wreck, and she saves it as much for sentimental value as something to help in an emergency.  It might be a gun that is loaned to a character, or a telephone number for a powerful lawyer.
As authors, we need to try to figure out just how much darkness our readers can handle, and when it is called for, offer a bit of hope.
Of course, you’ll never get a perfect balance.  You’ll always be too heart-wrenching for some readers and too much of a Pollyanna for others.  I’m convinced that this is the sole reason that no one book can satisfy all readers.
For more on David Farland's Writing tips, visit https://mystorydoctor.com/writing-blog/
And you can also click here to get your David Farland Daily Meditations.
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marigoldsinamber · 4 months
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The Devils on the Pew - Part 1
Summary:
Ned Flanders is a devil, a demon, Satan, whatever you want to call him. And his gorgeous wife is too.
They moved to Springfield with the idea of causing some trouble, earning a few souls, and having a little fun before they moved on. Their personas are perfect and their lives are comfortable but when they come up with an idea to seduce the local reverend and his wife, they don't expect to get into so much trouble. Or to actually grow this attached.
Ships: Devil!Ned Flanders/Reverend Lovejoy, Devil!Ned Flanders/Devil!Maude Flanders, Devil!Maude Flanders/Helen Lovejoy
Content Warnings: I suppose OOC for canon-Flanders but not for demon-Flanders.
Word Count: 3.3k
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
When a devil wanted to choose a town to live in for a couple of years, there were a few things they considered. Sometimes, they looked at the folk who lived there and decided they were wicked or greedy enough to fall prey to a demon’s bargain. Occasionally, they chose a place filled with idiots who’d never notice. Hell, sometimes they’d throw a dart at a map and get lucky enough to find a place with both.
And that was exactly what had happened when the devil found his way to Springfield with his beautiful wife right behind him.
Maude draped herself over his shoulders, sweet thing that she was, and gently kissed the corner of his mouth. Her tail swished through the air lazily as she smiled. “Bored, honey?”
“Undeniably,” he said with a dramatic sigh. “Why, it feels like years since I got somebody to sign a contract.”
“It was three days ago,” she teased. “Still, if you’re bored, we can find something fun. Do you want to drive somebody crazy again by following them around and singing? That makes so many turn murderous.”
She sounded so eager that he couldn’t help but laugh.
He’d chosen the right devil to stick by his side. The perfect combination of sweetness and danger, perfectly hidden beneath her acting skills. Why, if he didn’t know better, even he would think of her as a perfect suburban wife.
“Or you could always call the reverend again. Tell him you got a paper cut on your tongue and you think God’s punishing you.”
“Even that’s grown tiresome now I’m afraid. He’s started just giving me the most random verses for any problem.”
But it was tempting. This town gave him more entertainment than he’d bargained for with just about every fool you could imagine. A small nudge and they all fell into various sins without even a second thought. Even the sweetest of children hid dark desires and he’d really never felt more at home.
Unfortunately, even that wasn’t enough to keep him excited. He got awfully, maniacally bored with small temptations. Sometimes he just wanted to devour souls and wreak havoc upon the land.
There were footsteps on the landing and he hurried to hide his horns and goat legs as the children scampered around the corner. They weren’t demons. Maude had thought it would help their image to have a pair and honestly, he’d grown quite attached to the skittish boys.
“Daddy! Daddy! They’re throwing rocks at the windows again!”
He gritted his teeth, eyes narrowing as he heard the glass crack from the other side of the house. How he wanted to burn them all but punishing or, heavens forbid, slaughtering a few children would make them better behaved as a whole. The worse the kids were, the more everybody in town suffered.
Why, just the other day, he’d seen a few teenagers stealing an entire slushie machine from the convenience store.
He knelt down beside Rod and Todd and pulled them into a reassuring hug. “Don’t you worry about those boys, alright? I know they seem scary and intimidating now but remember, God will always protect us. You just have to have faith.”
They nodded their heads and buried their faces into his sweater before deciding by themselves to read a few pages of their bible. They hopped up to go find one and Ned wondered if maybe he’d made a slight mistake with how Christian he’d raised them. Certainly seemed more ironic with each passing day.
Maude smiled at him as he stood. “They’re so sweet.”
“Aren’t they?”
“I think we did a good job,” she said. “By the way, I’m going to our book club a little later so do you want to drop them off with a sitter? I made some sugar-free, flour-free brownies and everybody’s going to have to eat some to be polite.”
Ned chuckled. “You’re crueler than the devil himself, you know that? I can watch the boys though, so we don’t need a sitter.”
She smiled and playfully bumped her hip against his. “I was thinking that while I’m with my friends, you can take the reverend on a few errands with you. Helen really wants him to get out more.”
Ned laughed and agreed. The benefits from being from Hell ranged from easily terrorizing his favourite humans all the way to lower taxes. And he did love tormenting the town’s pastor who seemed to be getting more and more exhausted of him by the day.
He pressed a sweet kiss to her cheek before he disappeared with a puff, arranging for a sitter who could come watch the kids. It was a shame they had to drive there but on a street with the incredibly observant Helen Lovejoy and the paranoid neighbour who lived close to them, they needed to take the long route. He didn’t blame said neighbour though. Anybody would be jumpy with that many stolen goods in their home.
His sweater felt a little scratchy that day when they left the kids with a young demon who had nothing better to do and a healthy fear of him. It was the best way to know nothing would happen to the boys.
No demon wanted to experience his anger if his children got hurt.
Maude knocked and they waited patiently outside the Lovejoy’s house, both noticing the open window with sheets tied together that led from Jessica’s room. They exchanged glances but no words until Helen opened the door, her smile decidedly fake.
“Hi-diddly-ho, Helen,” Ned greeted. “Maude told me this book of yours is a real tear-jerker so I brought you all some tissues.”
Maude wrapped her arms tightly around Helen’s waist, hugging the other woman in greeting before she held out the platter. “And I brought my favourite brownies! I tried something new with the recipe this time.”
Helen smiled though the excitement didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Sugar-free?”
“Of course.”
Ned leaned down to give Maude a kiss on the cheek. “Have a good day, dear. I’ll be back around dinner time to steal you again.”
“Thank you,” she smiled. “And good luck with everything. Are you sure you don’t want company or anything?”
“I’ll be fine-diddly-doo. You enjoy your book.”
Helen’s attention had been caught. She couldn’t resist digging for information, even if it turned out to be awfully boring. “Are you up to something fun today?”
“My mother’s coming into town so we want to get her a small gift,” Maude filled in. “Neddy wants to pick it out himself but you know, I always worry because he gets so flustered about this kind of thing.”
Ned chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “I just want to make sure I get the right thing.”
Helen’s fake smile gave way for a real one as she had an idea. “Well, why don’t you take Time with you? My mother’s always coming over so he has plenty of experience and it’s not like he’s doing anything important today. He’s just playing with his trains.”
“Are you sure he wouldn’t mind? I’ve got to admit, I wouldn’t mind the help.”
“Of course, he won’t mind. Why don’t you come in while I fetch him?”
Maude smiled at him as she went to put her brownies down in the kitchen, giving him a small peck on the lips as she went past. The other guests hadn’t arrived yet. Ned had wanted to get there as early as was polite to make sure Helen helped them out.
If the reverend wasn’t able to go though, Ned had been eyeing out the mayor of the neighbouring town for a deal. Or if that fell through, Mr. Burns was always an easy target.
He could hear a faint argument and he stepped ever-so-slightly closer to listen without anybody noticing. Maude waved at him from the kitchen and he waved back, curious.
“Helen, we agreed that this would be my uninterrupted time with my trains.”
“But I already promised Ned you’d be willing to help and it would be great for you to get out for a while. What if the other ladies start feeling jealous that my husband is here? Next thing you know, Marge brings that awful Homer Simpson over.”
“It’s my house. I live here.”
“Do you have to be so difficult?”
“How am I meant to know what to buy his mother-in-law?”
“Get her the same thing you’d get for my mother.”
“Like poison?”
“What was that?”
“Nothing.”
Ned chuckled and strolled back to the front entrance when Helen reappeared with a promise that her husband would be out soon. It didn’t take long for him to drag his way up the stairs with an expression on his face that suggested he might be praying for salvation. It was too bad that Ned’s existence blocked off a good amount of divinity.
“Howdidly doodily Reverend,” he greeted despite the glare it earned him. “It’s such a beautiful day, don’t you think? Just filled to the brim with opportunity.”
“Truly.”
Ned’s smile was blinding as he bid goodbye to the two ladies. He kept up a stream of near endless and useless chatter the entire time he drove. Reverend Lovejoy barely responded to him but Ned made sure to intersperse enough questions to ensure the man couldn’t tune him out entirely.
Ned already knew what he wanted as ‘gift’ but he made sure to walk around the store and contemplated just about everything before he came to the selection of Bibles and hummed in appreciation.
He picked out two near identical ones with close prices and stared at them, contemplating which to buy with occasional muttered opinion.
“Ned, I believe those bibles are exactly the same,” Reverend Lovejoy told him after about two minutes passed.
“There’s a two-cent difference in the prices though,” Ned said and pointed to the sign. “There must be something missing from the cheapest one. What if I buy it for my mother-in-law and it’s missing two cents of content. I don’t think I’d forgive myself.”
“Buy her the more expensive one then.”
“But what if they haven’t taken anything out of this one and have instead added stuff to it instead?” Ned asked, sure to sound panicked. “What if they added something to the text.”
Reverend Lovejoy stared at him blandly. “I sincerely doubt that would have happened.”
“The devil works in all ways,” Ned said. “I don’t know if I can take that risk. Could you read this one and tell me if there’s anything untoward in it before I buy it?”
“You want me to read through the entire bible right now? In the store?”
“Well, the way I figure it, if anybody’s going to know if there’s something hidden it the pages, it’ll probably be you.”
“You can also get her both and then if she finds something strange or missing from one, you just replace it.”
Ned tapped on his chin as though thinking about it. “That sounds like a mighty fine idea but I don’t know if I want a possibly butchered bible in my house at all. God has been a little more sharp-eyed as of late, especially after we flicked to the wrong channel the other day. You remember it right?”
“You did call about it.”
“I wonder if she read through the last bible I got her or if she only read part of it…”
“Have you ever considered getting her a different gift?”
Ned took his time looking around the shop. There wasn’t really anything else fun – just a few incorrect psalms etched into mugs and dishtowels. He’d love to get one for Maude’s mother but he didn’t know her favourite, he told the reverend.
Honestly, one day he should buy something like this for Maude’s mother as a joke. He could imagine how she’d laugh at the idea.
“Oh, this one is almost in the same shade of blue as the one you used last week,” Ned said, eagerly picking up a third. “But it’s a whole dollar more. Boy for that price, I’d be expecting a new verse toward the back, wouldn’t you?”
“Sure.”
“Which bible do you use for sermons?”
“I… can’t remember.”
They could always stop by the library and pick it up but Ned felt that would be a little too cruel for now. Instead, he put all three back and nodded his head. “We should go look at a few other stores to make sure we’re not being ripped off.”
“I really don’t think that’s necessary.”
“No, no, you have to be careful. No sense in wasting money.”
Meanwhile, Maude gasped politely behind her hand after Luann finished her rant about how she hadn’t finished the book because of her husband’s childish tantrums. It sounded as though getting remarried had ruined their relationship exactly like it had the first time. She couldn’t help but feel bad for that poor child of theirs.
“I thought things would be different this time but he’s just as much of a loser now,” Luann complained. “It’s so frustrating. I just want to strangle him sometimes.”
“Men never learn,” Marge said sympathetically and put a hand on her shoulder. “I can’t begin to count how many times I ask Homer to do things nicely and he ends up completely forgetting. He can’t even remember my birthday.”
“Not all men are like that,” Maude defended. “Ned is great about those things.”
Bernice nodded in agreement. “Julius too. The biggest thing we fight over is him wearing his doctor’s coat out all the time.”
“They also fight about her day drinking,” Helen whispered, leaning in close so only Maude could hear her.
Maude giggled. She’d wanted to be friends with Helen from the day they arrived in Springfield and she couldn’t help but be proud of the accomplishment. The woman had more power over the people in this town than most imagined. The fear of getting into Springfield’s gossip mill kept many on her side.
Maude took advantage of that. Neddy liked to torment through pestering and an ever-happy grin but Maude preferred a subtler approach. Nobody ever suspected she might be the way Helen found out so many private details.
After all, how could a regular person know what went on in their homes?
“Maybe we should have some of the baked goods?” she recommended to Helen. “I think everybody could use a bite of something sweet to help settle the nerves before we talk about the book.”
“Of course,” Helen said. “I cannot wait to taste those brownies.”
Such a lie. One day, Maude would make actual brownies and they’d all be hilariously surprised.
Helen grumbled under her breath when they entered the kitchen and immediately began snatching various catalogues off the counters. She shoved them into an overflowing drawer nearby with great effort. “I’m going to burn all of this nonsense one day,” she complained. “I keep telling Tim to leave his train stuff in the basement but he never listens.”
“It’s sweet he has a hobby though,” Maude mentioned and leaned against the table. “Neddy doesn’t really have anything like that aside from reading the bible.”
Maybe they should choose a more obvious hobby. She enjoyed having the reputation of being the bland, boring family in town, but eventually somebody might wonder what they do during the day and tormenting townsfolk never sounded good on record.
She did want to cause some ripples soon. Maybe she would fake her own death? If it wasn’t for the kids, she’d eagerly do it in a second. Imagine…
“At least reading the bible doesn’t send your electricity bill through the roof,” Helen griped.
“It can when Ned gets to a really exciting part of it and he just can’t stop turning the pages. Once, he stayed up the whole night without even realising.”
She should read the bible again to keep up her charade. She had no idea how Ned had managed to remember all those verses and passages when the most he did was flip through the pages in between signing deals and cashing in on them.
Helen sighed and took out a few large plates to put things out on. “It’s rather funny, don’t you think? We complain all the time about our husbands but it could be far worse. I can’t imagine living a life like Marge’s.”
Maude shuddered dramatically. “I feel so sorry for her.”
Although years of living alongside the Simpsons had helped her realise Homer wasn’t all bad, she still didn’t like the man much. His children were menaces also and she hated inviting the family over even when Ned asked her to.
“And Luann’s husband somehow managed to be even worse. I think he must have stalked her the entire time they were divorced.”
“That’s very sad,” Maude said though she didn’t mean it in a pitying way. “I feel so sorry for their kid. He probably needs far more attention than they give him.”
Helen scoffed and rolled her eyes. “It’s pathetic really. I don’t think Luann’s mentioned him once today.”
Maude did find it hypocritical for Helen to lecture anybody about not paying attention to their kids when her own daughter was far worse than any of the town’s hoodlums. Jessica wasn’t a bad child deep down but Maude had never gotten the opportunity to properly speak to the poor thing. She wasn’t often home or at events with her family.
Helen hadn’t mentioned her daughter either though she did leave one brownie in the tin, likely for either Jessica or Tim. Maude winced. She didn’t want to eat the things herself.
“He has a crush on Marge’s girl, Lisa,” Maude offered, providing enough gossip for Helen to be happy. “But from what Todd saw, I think she’s more interested in one of those crass boys who terrorise everybody.”
“Oh really?” Helen asked. “Gets her taste in men from her mother.”
“Obviously.”
Maude brought the cupcakes from Bernice and Helen carried out the brownies when she noticed the light in the basement had been left on. She mentioned it to Helen who quickly hurried down the stairs to turn it off, muttering the whole way.
Maude peered down curiously, only getting a brief glimpse of the massive collection of model trains before everything plunged into darkness.
“His collection has grown since I last saw it,” she commented to Helen. “It’s almost impressive.”
Helen rolled her eyes. “Of course, it has. It’s the real love of his life, don’t you know? The other day, I saw a receipt for flowers and I got so happy, only to find out they were fake miniatures for the grass next to the train. We haven’t been on a date in forever but he’s there every day.”
She was keeping her voice down to make sure nobody else heard. A lot of her superiority came from the idea of her life being better than the other woman she surrounded herself with. Maude had a strong suspicion she was the only one who knew about Helen’s true feelings surrounding her marriage.
And the more she thought of it, the more of an opportunity she saw.
“Maybe we should go on a double date,” Maude said. “We can do something we’ve never done before like go on a camping trip or a hike. Wouldn’t that be lovely?”
Helen’s eyes brightened at the promise. “Oh, I don’t camp but I do know where this lovely little log cabin is we can rent. It would be amazing! You could even bring the boys if you wanted to.”
“They’ll be so excited! They’ve been getting much better with nature lately.”
Maude watched Helen carefully for the rest of the day, appreciating how her expressions stayed neutral even when she was irritated or smug. She couldn’t even deny that Helen was quite pretty when you looked past the judgmental sneer.
When Ned picked her up, she had a plan in mind.
Tim looked awfully unimpressed as he marched back inside his house, rubbing his temples as though a headache had formed over the day. Three bibles sat on the front seat and she laughed and she put them in the back after they’d driven away. Ned’s day had been a stunning success it would seem and she was mulling over offering Luann a deal.
“I have a brilliant idea,” she cooed as they made their way home. “I thought about it while I was talking to Helen.”
Ned raised an eyebrow at her; the very edges of his horns were beginning to poke through and she laughed, pushing them back down. It usually meant he was using some of his more demonic forces to watch the road while paying attention to her.
“You know I love your ideas,” he said.
“The Lovejoys have been going through a rough patch in their marriage,” Helen said. “And I think we could help them out in a more… physically fun way.”
Ned chuckled almost demonically. She wouldn’t even run a contract by him so this must be something far more interesting. “And how will we do that?”
“I just think they could use another avenue to release their frustrations.”
He inclined his head to her. “Well, that does sound like the best diddly idea I’ve heard all day. So neighborly of you and I know your devilish temptations are strong enough to charm just about any man.”
Maude preened beneath the praise. She knew she had talent when it came to drawing men’s eyes to her but no, she had no interest in seducing the Reverend. He’d never been that interesting to her. Not like Helen was.
“I’m thinking more about his wife.”
“You want to seduce Helen Lovejoy?”
“I want to try,” Maude said. “I like her Neddy and I think it would be great fun. Her soul would practically be mine after that. She’d have to sign a contract rather than let it get out.”
He chuckled. “Now, you don’t have to lie and say it’s for a contract. If we get one out of this, all the better but you know you’re allowed to have your fun without stealing any souls.”
“And I want you to seduce her husband.”
There, Ned hesitated. He tilted the car’s mirror down to look at himself, wrinkled his nose and frowned. “I don’t know about that. Maybe if I’d chosen a better form but… not this one.”
Maude rolled her eyes. “Are you joking? You’ve taken your shirt off before, right? This form is delicious.”
“Maybe to those who like men but I don’t think the reverend of a church is going to let his gaze wander to me,” Ned said. “You, I think, might have a chance.”
Did she notice a hint of jealousy in his tone? Her attention hooked, she leaned forward to ask, “Do you find him attractive?”
Ned scoffed. “Obviously. Why do you think I bother him as much as I do.”
“Then why not try? If he’s not interested, you leave it to me and I’ll just swoop Helen right out from under him. Best case scenario, we end up with only one soul rather than two but I have some stories from Helen that suggest you might have a better chance than you think.”
He shrugged. “I suppose there’s no harm in it. We should try not to get our names too messy though. I don’t want to have to move towns.”
“I promise. I’m a very smart devil.”
Ned smiled proudly at her. “That you are and hey, I’ve always rather liked those collars he wears.”
~
This work was inspired by this absolutely stunning artwork:
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