#classwork has been killing me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mooseonahunt · 8 months

Text

Cat’s Out of the Bag

Minecraft Streamer AU

Okay so I’ve had this thought brewing for a bit, but it’s about irl Serennedy vs their SMP characters. It’s about their relationship in and out of the Minecraft roleplay. It’s a lot so I’ll put it under the cut.

If they’re following the plot of the RE4 remake (with plenty of changes to make it fit Minecraft), then they’re clearly not together as a couple. But, for all the same reasons that we ship them, they’ve got those little moments interspersed in the roleplay and their fans pick up on them, too. It’s subtle enough not to out them, but it’s also subtle enough for it to be dismissed as being close friends (which they are; they’re dating but they’re also each other’s best friends).

So that kind of brought me to their shipping boundaries that I’ve posted elsewhere. Luis is chill with being shipped with other characters as long as the CC is also fine with it, but there’s kind of an exception with Leon. Luis is the captain of the Serennedy fanbase even though Leon has never outright stated his shipping boundaries. He never addresses it. Naturally there’s a divide in the fandom over whether or not it’s okay to ship Serennedy because, on the one hand, Luis is incredibly supportive of it, but on the other hand, Leon hasn’t ever said anything about it. It’s unclear what his thoughts are about it, but Luis is his best friend and encourages it, so it’s probably fine, right? There’s a lot of discourse over this.

It’s not like Luis and Leon are hiding their relationship on purpose though. It’s just nobody’s business. If they come out, they come out, but it’s not a huge deal. Besides, focusing on them as strangers developing a sort of friendship is ideal for the story they’re trying to tell. They reason it would make for a more compelling narrative if they’re not sure where they stand with each other because of their pasts instead of having them be together from the start. It makes for great storytelling getting to establish this sense of unease and distrust that develops into total trust after they open up to each other.

Then there’s also the fact that nobody knows they’re living together. They were roommates before they were together, so they each have their own rooms. They stream in their own spaces and don’t interrupt each other when they’re doing their own things, so nobody knows that they’re living together– which brings me to what I’ve been thinking about for a couple days now.

The news that Serennedy is, in fact, canon between the two actual streamers and that they live together doesn’t come out until well into the RE SMP’s story. It doesn’t happen until Luis’s character is killed off.

Luis is upset about his character dying, even if he did propose the idea himself. He wrote his way out of the SMP because he’s in grad school and his workload has started to pick up tremendously. He loved his time on the RE SMP, but he knew he couldn’t devote as much time as he wanted into it with his classwork piling up, so he made the decision to kill off his character. He didn’t realise how bummed out he would be about it until the day of. He finishes his stream, but he’s so sad over the end of his character, so he goes into Leon’s room while he’s still streaming. The chat goes wild. They realise Luis and Leon live together.

Luis walks over to him and asks to be comforted, so he sits on his lap and hugs him while Leon finishes up his stream. Again, the chat is going crazy. Serennedy is trending on Twitter. But that’s just a hug! It’s still totally friendly! Totally platonic! Leon pecks Luis on the lips because he knows he’s sad. That’s the end of the shipping discourse. People who thought they were queerbaiting are losing their shit. It’s like Nov 5th, 2020 for the Hellers except it’s actually clearly reciprocated. Leon ends stream like nothing’s happening. Ashley calls him to ask if everything’s okay because outing themselves like that was an insane move, but she’s happy for them and feels relieved that she doesn’t have to worry about slipping up and accidentally outing them herself.

The craze goes on for like a week and then everyone accepts it as the new normal. For a while nobody can get the Serennedy shippers to shut up about being right about them. Of course there are haters that drop the RE SMP, but they’re a minority and it’s not really noticeable when they leave.

This is subject to change as I continue to develop the AU, but I like this as the reveal. Sorry for rambling. I’m just really into this AU rn

#Minecraft streamers au #serennedy #luis serra #luis serra navarro #Luis Babygirl Serra #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil 4 remake #re4 remake #re4r #moose posting

28 notes · View notes

thevagabondexpress · 4 months

Note

Hi! I’m trying to befriend my favourite mutuals so I’m asking a bunch of questions to get to know you all better

What was/is your favourite subject in school? Were/are you good at it?

What country do you live in? What do you like/dislike about it?

Are you currently writing/planning an original story? If so, what is it about?

What genres of media do you usually consume? What books would you recommend to people?

What is your favourite poison?

what is your favourite method of murder (both to read about and what you would actually use)?

What patterns do you usually notice in the people that you hang out with?

Can I message you?

i. it depends, if you're talking elementary & middle school then english & lit hands down, but in high school it was the natural sciences: earth sciences, biology, ecology. i had great teachers for science in high school and i liked the way we did the classwork so i pulled good grades. the material itself was interesting too (i got to run around in the grass chasing butterflies with a net! we had microscopes!) and it didn't hurt that i had half the football team at least in my class and i somehow managed to get Gangsta Points(tm) with these kids for having lived on the south side of chicago as a little kid, so i managed to be cool for once.

ii. currently i live in the united states. there's so much to hate here; i'll list the one that's been dragging us most lately: privatized healthcare. as for things i like though, living in a corner of the country bordered by cryptid legends to the north (point pleasant's mothman) and west (the kelly-hopkinsville and hellier goblins), and the above-zero-fahrenheit winters, those aren't bad.

iii. i am currently working on some original projects, yes. i have three different main/major ideas but the one i'm focusing on most right now is the savage stars, which is book one of a duology i'm calling crater of grace. it has a series of short stories on ao3 if you want to check it out. it has holly black-inspired urban fantasy elements tucked into a grungy solarpunk space opera setting; i like to describe it as, "imagine if six of crows and star trek had a baby."

iv. i love sci-fi, fantasy, historical, murder mystery, and spicy queer romance. i especially like it when you get two or three or more of those genres combined. i do also love a good gothic horror novel. the books i'll always push at people are shirley jackson's we have always lived in the castle, heidi heilig's the girl from everywhere (as a standalone, the sequel is dead to me), kj charles's a charm of magpies, freya marske's the last binding, and any of anne perry's thomas pitt or william monk mysteries: anne is a classic in the victorian gothic crime novel genre.

v. i like Amanita phalloides, otherwise known as the death cap mushroom, purely because merricat blackwood does too and she is to me what hannibal is to a lot of other people. for legal reasons i do not mean this seriously.

vi. curse. definitely by laying a curse. send the hat man after this dude. literally kill him with the stuff of his own nightmares. but trapping him in a bell tower with the bells as they ring a la the nine tailors wouldn't be bad either.

vii. most of my friends are either queer or nerds or neurodivergent or all of the above. i have a surprising number of friends who are catholic. i do not know nearly enough goths which is a shame.

viii. yes. so long as it's not weirdly sexual or to plot a crime other than piracy, yes.

3 notes · View notes

felixcloud6288 · 3 months

Text

Higurashi: Curse Killing Chapter 9

The chapter picks up right after the last one. Some of the kids are still cleaning up Satoko's puke.

We've had a few instances in the previous arcs where we could say other people were possessed by demons to enact Oyashiro-sama's curse. Whenever they started acting strange, Keiichi questioned if they really were Rena or Mion.

And in this arc, Keiichi is the one being possessed. The extensive use of dark shading, black empty space, and darkened speech bubbles is an aspect of what the mind and perspective of one possessed by a demon is.

And of course Rena asked if he really is Keiichi Maebara. Whoever is possessed doesn't act like themselves.

We got some info that implies that Satoshi may have actually murdered his aunt and fled to escape arrest. But Mion points out some inconsistencies with that idea. The giant teddy bear Satoshi had supposedly been saving up for Satoko was bought on the same day he vanished. So he wouldn't have the money to leave.

It's almost as if he bought it and then disappeared on the way home.

At the very least, Keiichi now thinks he's fulfilling Satoshi's duty as Satoko's older brother because Satoshi isn't able to fulfill that role rather than because he refuses to.

And during Keiichi and Mion's call, Mion mentioned how she hasn't kept her promise to Satoshi, how she's neglected Satoko, and how she doesn't want that responsibility. It kinda makes the argument she had with Keiichi in chapter 6 seem less a matter of her being unable to take Satoko in and more a refusal to.

The ladder moment in Cotton Drifting implied Mion has some deep hatred for Satoko and with the new context, we can infer it has to do with Satoshi being driven to the brink by having to protect her from his aunt. And now we have this scene revealing that she essentially chose to abandon Satoko because of Satoshi's disappearance.

We're on the third arc and we're finally getting some Keiichi backstory. He was a generally average student but could excel when his classwork was in a from that interested him or felt relevant to his life.

And while he enjoyed the praise and the sense of greatness, it didn't last long. And the everything between that point and him moving to Hinamizawa was summarized as "A lot happened".

I want to go on a side-discussion about German Psychiatrist Emil Kraepelin (1856 - 1926) just because the teacher from Keiichi's flashback mentioned the Kraepelin analysis. I did a few quick wiki searches and some short reads on his works and theories hoping to find what the Kraepelin analysis is and tests for. But I didn't find anything.

But I did find out that Kraepelin was a pioneer in psychology and the founder of modern psychiatry. He looked into how the physical condition leads to disorders and was the first to differentiate schizophrenia (which he called dementia praecox) from manic depressive disorder.

So based on what his research was focused on, it makes me think that the analysis Keiichi was given implies he might have some form of mild schizophrenia.

The grave he dug is way too shallow.

It's wide enough to lay an adult body in, but it needs to be at least another 2 feet deep. If it rains, a good amount of the loosened soil can get washed away and as the body decomposes, it can build up gases that cause it to swell, further pushing against the loosened soil. Plus, the smell when the body decomposes can leak out and attract scavengers that will dig it up.

That last line...

back

Spoiler Discussion

So about that chat Keiichi and Mion had...

That is actually Shion. I can say this for sure because she was the one who spoke to Satoshi in the Eye-Opening arc when he asked "Mion" to take Satoko to the Cotton Drifting festival, but there are some little hints at the start of the call. "Mion" doesn't recognize Keiichi over the phone and only confirms she's "Mion" when Keiichi gives his name. She's also a bit startled when she realizes it's Keiichi and he thinks he's speaking with Mion.

Shion is the one who hates Satoko and didn't keep the promise to care for her when Satoshi is gone. Mion was genuine when she said she couldn't take Satoko into her care nor order a hit on Teppei as part of the curse.

#higurashi no naku koro ni #higurashi no naku koro ni reread #higurashi when they cry

2 notes · View notes

mellifluousmelodyfanfics · 2 years

Text

Brimestone Valorant (Smut)

Pairing: Brimestone Valorant XFem Reader

Warmings: Brimstone Dom, Reading Sub, oral, penatrating, possesive

18+ Only please

I stifled a yawn, raising my right arm high into the air as I stretched it. Why must I have to wake up so early in the god-damn morning for this? I thought as I looked out the large windows of the room I was in. The sun already setting over the horizon of the headquarters of Valorant. And how much longer must I put up with this training? I think as I look away from the window, it’s already been a month since I have joined this organization…. Why can’t he just put me in the field already? I shifted my weight from my right leg to my left, relaxing my posture. Honestly, I’m are not quite sure why he approached me… but to be invited by the commander of the valorant protocol himself. I said to myself as my eyes closed softly, feeling sleepy. Teamwork has never been my forte for most, if not all of my life. Alone… that’s right, I can’t trust anyone. Even if we are supposed to be a “team”. Or at least that's how Brimstone would say it. This entire month has been filled with combat training, from mastering a variety of guns to learning to harness and master these newfound abilities I have, but unfortunately, it has also been a lot of classwork. Feels like high school all over again. I sighed to myself, tilting my head, almost to rest it on my shoulder as my eyes drifted all the way closed. Where is Brimstone anyway? I thought. He has never been late, so long as I have been here… I could hear his deep burly voice in my head. Every morning, when I and the whole Valorant team would eat together, he reads me my schedule for the day, of course in military time. I swear it's the only way he knows how to read the time. I’m the only one on the team with a schedule… so annoying… My breathing slowed as I drifted off slightly. “Neptun!” Brimstone snapped, his voice echoing across the room, making me jump out of my skin, straightening my posture “Good evening Brimstone…Sir” I announced, bringing my hands to my side standing at attention. I could hear his heavy footsteps approach me from behind, he stopped right behind me pausing for a moment, leaning close to my ear. “Were you sleeping just a moment ago? Soldier?” He asked, but I knew it wasn’t a question, more so him demanding an answer. I took in a sharp breath, breathing in Brimstone's scent of gunpowder and cedar. I can’t lie… that would make this situation worse. I thought, hesitating for a moment. “Yes Sir, I’m sorry Sir. It won’t happen again.” I informed, Brimstone stood up, moving away from my ear and walking in front of me, moving to stand in front of me and front of the chalkboard on the wall. “Neptun, you are new here, and you need to start taking this more seriously. We are a part of a team now, and before I ever send you out into the field to go fight the attacking radiants.” He started to lecture, I sighed slightly. “I’ve only heard this a million times” I complained to myself. Why on earth must this man be such a hardass? Why am I even putting up with this bullshit? I had a life all before this. I had a successful career, I had everything I ever wanted and yet somehow this man convinced me to join this group for the “good of the world”. Just as I thought that I was pulled forward by my forearm, I looked up to see Brimstone's face only a few inches in front of mine. “Damn it Neptun…What is it going to take for you to just…listen to me” he demanded as I shifted my gaze to look into dark amber eyes. Making direct eye contact with my commander, I pulled my arm up; trying to get him to release his grasp but he only just tighten his grip. I had nothing to say to him as to why I wouldn’t listen. Why couldn’t he just have faith in me? He knows I can shoot, he knows I can kill, and yet he keeps me on this childish schedule. The control he keeps putting on me feels like a damn collar wrapped around my neck. “I don’t want to listen to you. Especially when you don’t listen to me! Commander, all you do is control me!” I snapped at him, once again trying to pull away by taking a step back but Brimstone reached and grabbed my other arm, holding them up in front of me and not letting me go. “Why won’t you just let me into the field?! Why won’t you let me be with the other agents?! You keep telling me we are a part of a team, you keep telling me it's important I understand that and yet you aren’t letting me join it! Why?!” I argued, turning my head towards him. Brimstone looked frustrated with me, as I opened my mouth, wanting to snap at him again. “IT’S BECAUSE I DON’T WANT YOU TO GET HURT. I DON’T WANT ANYONE ELSE ON THE TEAM TO SEE YOU IN THE WAY THAT I SEE YOU, Y/N. I ASKED YOU TO JOIN THIS TEAM BECAUSE I WANTED YOU HERE AND I DON’T WANT TO SHARE YOU WITH THE OTHERS.” he admitted, yelling in a harsh firm tone, I took a small step back slightly shaken, but I couldn’t step back far enough as he still held onto my arms, I haven’t ever heard him yell before. I looked up at Brimstone, his face seemed flushed slightly. “You… Don’t want me to get hurt? Didn’t you bring me here to help defend our world? Of course, I would possibly get hurt brimstone.” I said, my voice a lot softer now. “You brought me here, you know the risks I would be facing…” I added lowering my gaze. He…cares for me in that kind of way? I thought to myself and brimstones grip finally loosened. “Look… Neptune… When I heard first heard from Astra that you would make a good addition to the team. I had to do surveillance on you. See if she was right. I can’t explain the way you made me feel. But I knew she was right. You’re a pro, as good as they come, and I knew I wanted you to be mine.” He mumbled slightly. “Be…Yours?” I whispered, but not looking up, his grip finally loosed from one of my arms but only to grab me by the chin and pull my face towards his. I closed my eyes, not wanting to look him in the eyes any longer.” “Look at me, Y/N” He demanded, but I couldn’t. No one has ever cared for me before, no one has ever been this kind to me before. I can’t… I can’t look at him. I thought, feeling myself become flush slightly. “I said, look at me.” His voice, more firm…letting out a soft breath, I opened my eyes immediately making eye contact with him, just as I did his thin lips pressed against mine with slight force, but I didn’t pull away anymore, my shoulders relaxed slightly. his lips were warm and soft. mine parted slightly, allowing his tongue to slip inside. As he leaned down into the kiss more, he used the hand he still had on my arm to spin me around and pressed me against the chalkboard. His body pressed against mine heatedly against the chalkboard, and our breathing became heavier, I could taste our shared breath, and feel the thud of our combined heartbeat as he groaned with frustration. He removed his hands from my wrists only to place them on the chalkboard behind me, still trapping my body against his, but even if I could. I didn’t want to run from him, my hands dropped to my sides as my body felt warm and limp. The blood rushed to my head, as my knees started to buckle. Brim pulled away slightly, moving his hands from the wall to my lower back to catch me. “This… this is what you do to me Y/N….Every time I saw you, the only thing I could imagine was the taste of your lips…” He said, gliding his right hand up the curves of my body and onto my chin. He glided his thumb across my bottom lip, as I looked up at him. His eyes glazed over as he stared down at me. “Now that I know the taste. I don’t think I can stop. I want to know what the rest of you tastes like..” He pleaded with me. I have never been this vulnerable with someone before… I thought hesitating a moment before I finally nodded. As soon as I did, Brim did not wait for another second, his lips crashing onto mine again as both his hands moved to my face, pulling me to him. His tongue parted my lips as his tongue started massaging mine, occasionally biting my bottom lip. His hands moved everywhere on my body, up my back and over my arms and suddenly he started kissing me harder, deeper, with a fervent urgent need I’d never known before. I moaned as we kissed, and he placed his right knee in between my legs, once again pinning me in place. His lips slowly moved away from mine, as I let out a soft whimper already longing for him to kiss me again. It was like I had found a new drug and I was already hooked, waiting for my next fix. Brimstone caressed my face, and feeling his rough hands on my skin made me shiver with pleasure. "Good girl" he whispered as he leaned down, pressing kisses gently on my neck. My mouth fell open, as I helplessly let out soft moans, unable to control myself. He started to suck and bite on my neck, gently at first but quickly becoming more possessive of my body. His hands continued to roam, caressing me in several areas. His right hand moved to grab my shirt from the bottom, his left hand reaching for my wrists as he pinned my arms above my head; pulling my shirt up and exposing my bra. My skin flushed as he did and I heard him toss my shirt to the side, his lips started to travel downwards leaving small marks across my lower neck and collarbone, occasionally I let out small whimpers as he nipped my skin roughly. He kept my hands pinned against the chalkboard as he did with my body as he pleased. Abruptly he pulled away, my hands dropping to my sides once again as he took a few steps back. He still looked rather calm, as I panted trying to catch my breath. “W-why…did you stop?” I asked, no pleaded to Brim as he stood there towering over me, his chest slowly rising in falling as he had a small smirk on his face. “You follow my orders, soldier.” He said in an assertive tone. S-Solider? Is that all I am to him? I thought as he took a step forward once again. Taking my chin in his hands. “As your commander, I order you to strip for me and get on your knees… baby girl,” he said in an intimidating tone, swallowing hard. I nodded, my face blushing a bright cherry red. He let go of my chin as I reached around my back, unclasping my bra and letting it drop to the floor. Feeling self-conscious I covered my breasts. “Don’t you dare cover-up. I want to see all of you.” He scolded, gulping slightly I nodded as I took my boots off, pushing them to the side with my left foot, working up the courage to undo my belt. My last pair of clothing fell to the ground, as I stepped out of my pants, I hesitated for a moment, as I carefully and slowly pulled down my underwear. Stepping out of it, and leave them on the floor as I step away from the pile of clothes. “On your knees.” I shrink to my knees as soon as he orders it, he bends down and cups my cheeks. He gently strokes my face, and I shift my eyes up towards Brimstone, making eye contact with him as he stares down softly almost admiring me. His thumb runs across my bottom lip again, pulling on it slightly. “I’m going to make you mine Y/N.” He told me and I give a nod. I want him… my body is already craving for him to touch me more. “Say it.” he orders “W-what?” I mutter and he leans down, getting on one knee in front of me and yet somehow still towering over me. “I want to hear you beg for me. Beg me to fuck you.” He says, running his hand up my neck and grabbing onto my ponytail and giving it a firm grasp. “B-Brimestone… Will you please fuck me?” I asked letting out a whimper as he pulls my hair and pulls me towards him. “It’s Sir or Daddy, and secondly I know you can do better than that. So beg.” I bit my bottom lip gently as I felt him tug harder, being impatient. I don’t think I could ever call him Sir again if I say it as vulnerable as I am now. Letting out a shaky breath I parted my lips, “P-please Daddy…” I quivered out. “Please give this slut your cock, Daddy.” Brimstone chuckled, as he used his free hand to undo his belt buckle. He pulled his pants and underwear enough to expose his enlarged member and he started stroking it gently. “You want Daddy’s cock? Is that what you want baby girl?” he asks almost mocking me and I nod. “Mmmh, where do you want daddy's cock?” He asks, and I blush, wanting to look away but he is still holding my hair. “I…In my mouth, Daddy. Please fuck my mouth, Daddy.” I say, swallowing my pride. As I shift my legs as I kneel, my body responding to with slick quivers “Good girl. Now… open those pretty little lips and stick out your tongue.” He orders, finally letting go of my hair, relaxing my tongue as I stick it out he places the tip of his cock on it. He rubs the tip over my tongue; gently and slowly. My body builds in anticipation as he groans slightly, placing my lips gently around the tip of his cock I start sucking. Swirling my tongue around his member, he chuckles as I greedily as I take more into my mouth. “Mmmh. What a good little slut you are. Do you like Daddy’s cock?” He asks as I nod. Swallowing around his cock as my tongue moves circles around it. Brimstone's breathing becomes heavy as he moans under. I pump my head back and forth, swallowing hard as I take more of his cock into my mouth, drool slowly dripping from my mouth as cock becomes more engulfed by the heat of my mouth. I can hear him moan and groan my name as I suck harder, his hands move to the side of my head, his fingers ranking into my hair as he grips it hard. He starts moving his hips, timing it with my head. A primal-like urge takes over him as he starts slightly forcing my head deeper and deeper down his cock. Shivers and pleasure run down my body as he moans again. “You're going to make me cum, baby girl.” He groans as I look up at him, making eye contact as he looks down at me, I give a hard swallow as with one hard thrust he shoves his cock deep into my throat as he cums deep into my mouth. I see his body shiver as he pants, the feeling overcoming his body, as he pulls his cock out of my mouth I let out a soft whimper. The salty, but slightly sweet taste overwhelms my tastebuds as I swallow. Brimstone pets the side of my head gently with his right hand. His thumb from his left-hand wipes over my plump lips, wiping them clean. “Good girl… Daddy should reward you for doing so well.” He moans, reaching his hand out towards me. I gently take it as he helps me to my feet. A-A reward? I think as he takes me to the side of the room, holding my hand gracefully. He takes me over to the large windows. The room where we were in must have been an old classroom for all the agents at one point. There are desks and chairs pressed up against the walls close to where we stood. Brimstone turns around, letting go of my hand and placing it on my shoulder. He spins me around, pushing my back up against the glass. The cold glass makes me shiver as I let out a slight gasp, removing his hand, brimstone strips the rest of his clothes before getting down on his knees. His hands tenderly moved up my legs and up my thighs, slowly teasing them and pressing kisses on them. Leaving small nibble marks as his hands brush against my pussy. My body shivers in response to his touch and I grip the small ledge on the wall. “Your pussy is so wet for me. Your body knows it belongs to me.” He groans before burying his head in between my leg, his lips sucking harshly. His tongue danced along my clit and I let out a raspy moan, my fingers making their way into his short hair and I held it. My head pressed against the glass as I let out another moan. He chuckled but didn’t stop. Moving his tongue faster, I looked down and saw him staring up at me, his eyes filled with lust as he teased my entrance with his fingers. He slowly inserted two digits in me, pumping in and out and making my body shiver more. “Daddy that feels so good” I moaned out, my mouth falling open and letting out loose moans. I didn’t even care to hold back anymore. He chuckled, pulling back slightly but not taking his fingers out as he curled them in your core, hitting in the perfect spot. My backed arched against the glass and my hips moved upwards. “Daddy, I’m going to cum!” I whimpered out, he chuckled as he moved his free hand and pushed your hips down. “Ah ah, not yet baby girl.” He purred as I let out a small whimper of defeat. He brings his mouth back to my clit and starts sucking again. My body shivers in pleasure and I let out more and more moans. “Cum for Daddy.” He says, pulling away from my clit, pumping harder inside of me as my body releases in a wave of pure pleasure. His hot breath lands on my core as I shiver and go slightly limp as I pant. He pulled his finger out of me, them dripping in my juices. He smiles up at me before licking them. “What a good little slut you are.” He mumbles as I try and catch my breath. Without really getting a moment to pause, he stands up, placing his hand on my shoulder and turning me around again. My face grows hot as I face the windows. I don’t think anyone is outside…but if anyone saw me like this. I think. Brimstone places his hand on my back, pushing my boobs up against the glass, he gently takes my left hand and moves it on the glass. The cool touch of it makes my body shiver and my nipples harden. He does the same thing with my other hand as I turn and look over my shoulder. Using his foot he spreads my feet apart. Brimstone strokes his hard cock a few times while he looked at me, he must enjoy seeing me in this variable position. Swallow my pride I open my mouth, “P-Please…Daddy, I can’t wait anymore…Please give me your cock.” My whole body trembles from arousal, wanting to cum again. To feel his cock inside of me. “Mmh~ You really are my good little slut. I’m going to make your body mine..” He says, his body looming over mine, the tip of his cock teased my entrance as he let out a soft groan. He slowly started pushing in, and I heard him hold his breath slightly as he moaned. He edged into me slowly, pushing in deeper and deeper as I let out a shaky moan. I bit back the groan that formed in my throat. I pushed my hips up subconsciously taking him deeper and he chuckled. Brimstone took his hands and placed them on my hips with a bruising grip, as he pushed in the last inch of his cock. He started thrusting into me, deep and hard, every thrust with greater power as I both moaned. Still holding my hips he guided them with each thrust, my face and boobs pressed up hard against the window. “Do you like Daddy’s cock?” Brimestone asked groaning between his teeth. “Y-yes D-daddy” I whimpered out. Brimstone’s hands moved up my back, slowly grabbing a fist full of my hair and pulling my head back. “mmh~ Say that again Baby girl.” He commanded, I looked up at him as he pulled my hair. “Y-Yes Daddy~ I-I love your cock!” I moaned out and he thrusts harder. Pulling me up so I was standing, he fucked harder and in at a deeper angle. His free hand grabbed my right breast and started massaging it roughly. Our moans filled the room as he pressed his lips to mine. The pure euphoria with every thrust, my pussy clenched around his cock. My body was tense from pleasure as shivers moved around my body. Removing his lips from mine, he twisted my body around pushing me up against a small filing cabinet. He stared into my eyes as he continued to pump into me, the small clanking from the filing cabinet, it shook as he fucked me. Brimestone removed his hand from my breast, as he started teasing my clit. “F-fuck~ I-I’m going to cum again” I let out a soft whimper. “M-Me too, baby” He groaned, with a hard thrust there was a clank above us but neither of us looked and saw what it fell. The ground underneath us lit up a soft orange and Brimestone’s hips started moving faster. “Ah~ ah~ B-Brimestone, that's too fast!” I let out a soft groan, Brimstone couldn’t say anything as he panted. I looked down slightly as the soft orange glow, only to see none other than a stim beacon on the floor. My hips started moving more, timing with his thrusts as we both were overcome with a surge of energy. Our lips pressed together again, our tongues dancing with each other as we moaned. Dissolving into pleasure, my body pulsed and clenched around his cock, and my vision faded slightly with each one of his super-human-like thrusts. “I-I’m cumming!” I screamed out, as I collapsed, falling into his chest. Brimstone panted and moaned into my ear, with a small whimper he pulled out of me and pumped his cock with his hand. Pushing his cock against my stomach he came, and let out a groan. He collapsed into me as well, as we slide against the cabinet and to the floor. Both just held each other until he leaned over and picked the stim beacon up. “This…This we are going to use again.” He said with a small chuckle before tossing it to the side. I let out a small whimper of agreement, his hands made their way to my face as he cradled it in my hands, he gently pushed a few strands out of my face and pressed a kiss to my forehead…Then my lips…

#valorant #val #smut #18+ readings #18 #brimestone #brimmy #agent

2 notes · View notes

meanwhileinstasiville · 1 month

Text

The metaphorical writing is on the wall or; what kind of experience you can buy for a dollar

You know, I used to sleep above the bridge between two towns, because of the view and the vantage point more than say, security. After a short (very short time, I might add) time of stopping there, some graffiti artists decided in their infinite wisdom to draw a blue beady eyed guy staring at the very spot I was sleeping.

An adult behavior this isn't, but it is the work of very dangerous people.

And I don't know how best to explain how this stuff goes to a broad audience. When I was in school, the valedictorians took classes with low homework loads; because they had no more intention of doing it than anyone else. So to academic admins it was a distinction without a difference whether "kids were struggling" or "kids have no intention of doing homework". It's not that they were "gaming the system" either; kids took whatever classes they academically placed into, and then educators were forced to grade on a continuum whereby finished a third of the book of classwork was equivalent annually to finished a half or three quarters or even less than a third.

So they'd promoted the students to what real life would call their level of incompetence. Which kids graduate to college, graduate to the workforce. I'm from an era of the 1980s and also a community where people were lined out as children for careers commensurate with their respective wealth and subseque class privilege. Grades and discipline not that big of a thing, because it was Reagan and then Bush if you happened to start school in the late 80s.

A third of algebra, and then a third of trig, of calc, and so on. As a "life sciences" guy, I tried to take the classes that were hard in case I happened to need to know any of the stuff that I was supposed to be learning.(And my "graffiti" example, was brought to me by people who gamed the system).

It's not that it's based on anything concrete (even though it was an exposed face of a bridge), in terms of reasoning, but a function of delegation when it's your choice regardless of any thinking you might have put into it. Because that's what you become when you succeed coming from the eighties. So I can have the adult version of "I can get the truant officer to make you talk to me when I want attention!" which is nothing new to me, but the community as a whole here is not going to do well by it.

We have an unsolved unsolvable as yet murder to show for this stuff to; "who shot mr burns" seems to be the go-to even for the fbi. Also completely ignoring that you can't simply kill someone in broad daylight where nobody sees something, and with no planning, and with no consulting a larger group, specifically because in that last case; there's no evidence to go with no one seeing anything. Where it becomes like a stabbing on the subway crowded with people who "saw nothing". Very much alike "did they complete calculus?" and they got a passing grade throughout the year, but nowhere near a complete course.

So to answer "how does THAT make you feel?!!" Including the coopers: this is exactly the same shit I saw when I was a little kid. Around Oregon, seems nothing has changed since then.

Even with supposed "jump scare" stuff to open my day. No more receptive to it than I ever was, and I've been one of those "low latent inhibition" guys since about the time I got into a car crash. So none of this is affecting my opinion on anything.

0 notes

alias-sam · 3 months

Text

Pierced by a Golden Soul

Chapter 34. Eavesdropping

Platonic Jojo's x Reader

Summary: Fate is a bizarre concept with countless more bizarre implications. In life sometimes such extraordinary events happen that the only reasoning left must be fate. The tragedies that constantly befall the Joestar bloodline for example may be the unluckiest series of cards drawn in human history, or perhaps the work of a greater power. There is no way to tell for sure. Had Dio Brando or Jonathan Joestar moved slightly on a divergent path the world itself would be left very different. The fate or luck of the noble Joestar bloodline has led to destruction of evil likes of the Pillar Men and DIO. This story is of a similar caliber to that of the other Joestars (as I am sure you are familiar with them). This is a story of lost souls, compassion, hope, and above all fate.

Word Count: 2,445

(Crosspost from Wattpad, full fic is already posted there.)

"So...run this by me again." Tim sat next to you in the biology lab, writing down the results of the water tests. "You're going to go consult with your stand user associates and do what exactly? Where did you even meet these people?" You rolled your eyes, handing him another test tube.

"They're experienced with these things apparently. They haven't led me wrong so far, as of right now I trust them. They haven't given me much reason not to." It had been awhile since you'd been able to talk to Jaya, so Tim was your next best option for someone to vent to.

"I still think it's a bad idea." Tim muttered. "They're strangers." In true Tim fashion, he was facing the plan with a level of logic and criticism. As of late, you hadn't had the luxury to distrust and verify. You rested your head on the table, the full force of today's events finally taking an effect on you.

"I'll keep your concern in mind." You said, sitting upright.

"What are you two talking about?" Vita suddenly appeared behind the two of you, Tim nearly jumped from his seat. Vita looked no worse for wear. Given the fact he literally took a fall for you the other day, you were glad he hadn't hurt himself too bad. For awhile you were worried he was gone because of that little stunt.

"Uh- project...stuff." Tim replied, fumbling with his test tubes.

"Hey V. Nothing much." You greeted casually. "Didn't we talk about finishing the last bit of the project at your house the other day?"

"We did!" Vita lit up at the change in subject. "Wanna do it tomorrow?"

You glanced over at Tim who was still looking rather sheepish.

"I'm free." You shrugged. Vita turned to Tim expectantly. Tim adjusted his glasses, not taking his eyes off of the graph he was working on.

"I have some things I need to work on, sorry."

"No problem." Vita chirped. "Y/n and I can put it together ourselves, right?"

"I don't see why not." You shrugged again. Before the conversation could go on any longer the teacher called Vita away, saying something about missing classwork. Vita gave you a wave goodbye, you simply gave him a nod before continuing your work with Tim. "So what was the pH for sample three-" You glanced over to Tim only to find incredulity was written all over his face. "What?"

"I have no idea if you're crazy or just stupid."

"Excuse me?"

"That guy is a walking red flag!" Tim whisper shouted, pointing over to Vita who was just across the room.

"I wouldn't say that." You replied lightly making Tim lower his hand. "He's not nearly as bad as people assume."

"I hope you're right" Tim sighed, settling down a bit. "No offense, but you rely way to much on your judge of character."

"I wasn't all that wrong about you, was I?" You joked. The conversation reminding you of a similar one you had with Learco. Tim seemed creeped out by your classmate, but was far more subtle than Learco.

"Well- yeah..." Tim faltered. "But I was also t-trying to kill you."

"No you weren't." You shook your head, placing a hand on your friend's shoulder. "You don't have it in you, and neither does Vita." Tim was calming down, but there was still an obvious apprehension in his eyes. "If he is a stand user, I can handle myself." You assured him.

"Whatever you say Y/n."

..........

Tim's words had an unexpected effect on you. Perhaps you had become too complacent? Could one too many near death experiences do that? Even as you were walking into Mr. Joestar's apartment building, the thought was bothering you. It was never a bad idea to be more careful. Tim had also made a good point about your judgment. So far you hadn't been wrong on going with your gut. It was strange. Ever since meeting Learco at the dock, it was like a sixth sense. Just by being around a person, you got a read on their character, even without any particular proof. Now that you were thinking about it, you had always been like that, really it wasn't a useful skill until recently. As you were trudging up the many flights of stairs in the building, a thought occurred to you. You stopped mid step and summoned Golden Soul. The stand watched as you tiredly leaned the wall behind you. After checking the stairwell was empty you sighed, looking your stand up and down.

"I'm only going to ask this one more time, what exactly can you do?" Your question was met with silence. "Still nothing? C'mon, I know you can talk." In fact, you'd heard your stand yell on several occasions while fighting or punching things. Your anger only grew when Golden Soul didn't even give you a nod or shrug. "Jeez. What the hell does 'muda' mean anyways?" You moved from the wall to pace across the steps. "Is that even a word?" You asked, once again being met with silence. "I'm really starting to wish you came with an instruction manual." You muttered, glaring at your non responsive stand. "Whatever. I just thought if I asked nicely you might answer." As Golden Soul dissipated you continued your way up to the top floor. "It was a long shot anyways."

.........

When you eventually reached the top floor you were winded. This place really needed to invest in an elevator or something. You quickly reached into your pocket, taking a moment to make sure you still had the metal shard. It was safely sealed in a new ziplock baggy.

"I really hope you aren't as troublesome as I think you are." You muttered looking at the tiny piece of gold-ish metal before tucking it back in your pocket. After a few minutes of searching, you found the apartment you were looking for. Without remotely as much hesitation as last time, you knocked on the door and waited. There was a quick shuffling sound before the door was opened by a very tired looking blonde woman.

"You're too pretty to be Mr. Jotaro."

"Excuse me?"

"S-sorry ma'am." You apologized, stepping away from the door, you checked the flat number. "I could have sworn this was Mr. Joestar's place." It looked like the right apartment, then again, the complex was massive. It wasn't impossible you just got turned around.

"It is." The blonde woman replied. She regarded you carefully before seeming to realize something. "You wouldn't happen to be Y/n, would you?"

"Yeah..." You nodded hesitantly. "That's me."

"Jotaro told me you were going to come by." The woman stepped aside, gesturing for you to come in. You tried ignoring it, but she was eyeing you oddly. It made sense though, you were a stranger after all. You didn't know this woman or her relation to the two stand users you were seeking out.

After an awkward moment standing in the doorway, you passed the threshold and followed the woman inside. The flat was exactly the way you remembered it except the boxes were gone now. On the floor next to the coffee table, a little girl was playing with a stuffed toy fish and a model race car. An elderly woman was sitting on the couch drinking tea and watching the young girl.

"Who was at the door dear?" The older woman looked over to where you were standing and smiled. "Oh! You must be Y/n. Joseph told me you were coming." Despite her age, the woman jumped up to greet you. The older woman snatched up your hand to shake it. "It's lovely to meet you. I'm Mrs. Joestar."

"Nice to meet you ma'm." You replied, finally gaining enough sense to speak. There was something about the woman's bubbliness that made you feel much more at ease. The blonde woman that answered the door was still glancing at you with suspicion, or maybe caution. It was hard to tell. "I don't mean to be rude, but might I ask where Mr. Kujo and Mr. Joestar are?" Both women tensed, it was slight, but just enough for you to notice.

"They're in the office." The blonde woman pointed down the hall hesitantly.

"They've been talking for awhile." Suzie Q sighed.

"Please excuse me," You said, turning to face the hallway. "But I really need to speak with them."

"Of course." Suzie smiled, moving back towards the couch where she was earlier. The blonde woman who answered the door for you gave you one last weary glance before following.

You quietly made your way down the hall. As you neared the office door the hum and muffled mutterings of a conversation caught your attention. The office's door was cracked open slightly, giving you a small view inside. Confused, you walked closer, stopping right outside the door.

"Y/n doesn't even know about all this." You heard Mr. Joestar sigh. He sounded tired. "You can't expect them to be like him."

"Can I?" Jotaro snapped back. "You haven't seen Y/n fight. You haven't seen their stand." It was unusual to hear much emotion from Jotaro, but by his tone alone you could tell he was stressed, maybe even scared?

"Jotaro..." Joseph responded softly. Typically, you weren't the type to eavesdrop, but given the conversation pertained to you...You decided to keep listening just a bit longer.

"Sorry." Jotaro took a slow steadying breath. "You remember all the things he did."

"It's not Y/n's fault." Joseph reminded his grandson softly. There was a shuffling sound and the quiet squeaks of an office chair.

"I don't understand how you can be so calm about this." Jotaro muttered.

"Because you're overreacting." Joseph said with a slight laugh. The two men continued talking, but their conversation fell on deaf ears. Your heart was racing for some reason. They had been talking about you. Why? The exchange was incredibly out of context, giving you nothing to work from.

With slow and deliberate movements, you snuck back down the hallway into the living room. The little girl was still sitting on the floor, playing around with her toys. The women were standing in the kitchen, both with a teacup in hand. Suzie noticed your appearance and frowned.

"Is everything alright?" She set down her cup to approach you.

"Y-yeah!" You answered quickly, already reaching for the front door. "It's probably for the best I don't interrupt them." You laughed awkwardly.

"You couldn't possibly go out in the rain." Suzie Q motioned over to the window. Indeed, the sky was overcast, water was softly pattering against the glass panes. You hadn't even noticed.

"Its fine." You sighed. "I've walked home in much worse." The rain was light, nothing compared to some torrential downpours you had faced before.

"Please, take a seat. I insist." Suzie Q urged gently. "You look tired."

"I wouldn't want to intrude ma'am." You said, trying to escape her concerned gaze.

"It's no trouble!" Suzie laughed, standing her ground on the subject. "Can I interest you in some tea?"

"No but thank you." You answered, taking a seat on the couch. Suzie Q gave you a small nod and went back to the kitchen. You propped one hand on the arm of the couch. The moderate tapping of raindrops on the building slowly lulled you a state of dissociation. You simply stared at the wall in front of you, thinking about the conversation you'd just overheard. It was odd, and severely out of context, but the two Joestars were distressed over something, something pertaining to you. Before your train of through could press the subject any further you felt a small hand tap on your leg. You looked down to find the little girl who was playing on the floor just a moment ago. She was watching you with wide curious eyes.

"Who are you?" She asked, pointing a finger in your face. She couldn't be more than six if you were guessing.

"Just a visitor." You shrugged, lightly pushing her hand away.

"My name's Jolyne." The girl introduced herself. You watched as she hopped up onto the couch next to you. "Mamma calls me Jojo." After a moment of contemplation, you decided to just roll with it.

"No way!" You responded with mock excitement. "My friend calls me that too!"

"No way!" Jolyne said airily, echoing your own tone. You awkwardly looked away from the girl, unsure on what else to do or say. She shuffled across the couch before tapping your shoulder. When you looked back, she was holding her toys. A car and a stuffed fish. "Pick."

"Uh... what?"

"Pick one!" Jolyne smiled, holding the two toys up to you. You hesitantly took the stuffed fish. It was a soft pastel blue and green; it was a bit worn down, obviously well-loved over time.

"This guy's pretty cute." You admitted, running a hand over the stuffed toy's tail. Jolyne shrugged, taking her toy car and rolling it across the edges of the couch.

"Hey!" She tapped on your arm excitedly. "Watch this!"

The little girl proceeded to jump off the couch, tossing the car in the air. You panicked, seeing her leg snag on a nearby side table holding a lamp. In the span of a second Golden Soul grabbed the table and lamp, preventing them from landing on Jolyne. On instinct you managed to catch the toy car before it landed on the poor girl's head.

You stood there, frozen in shock. The six-year-old smiled up at you.

"Careful!" You scolded, handing the car and stuffed fish back to the girl. "Good grief kid! You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Awesome! Again! Again!" Jolyne clapped. "You're like a superhero!" She pointed at the lamp that Golden Soul was now holding. To a non-stand user, to would look like it was floating. You quickly put the lamp down and had your stand dissipate. At this point the women in the kitchen had noticed the commotion. Suzie Q walked in, observing the scene of Jolyne on the floor and your mildly alarmed expression.

"I think I should go..." You trailed off, glancing between Jolyne and Suzie Q. "Thank you for the hospitality, but if I stay my mom is bound to start worrying." You said, slowly inching towards the door. "Thanks again. Bye"

You practically ran away from the apartment. The rain didn't even bother you. It was a light sprinkle if anything. After gaining a comfortable distance from the building you stopped, breath heavy, to look up at the overcast sky. Your mind was swimming.

The Martez brothers. Julius Rossi. The Arrow. Golden Soul. The Joestars. All were pieces of a puzzle that was sitting in front of you. The problem was there wasn't a single corner piece to help start putting it together.

Nothing made sense anymore. Maybe it never made sense in the first place.

You needed some time to think.

1 note · View note

titoist · 5 months

Text

when i think too hard about my classwork, i now feel what it is all an extension of: that it is meant as preparation for the job market, which feels like a general threat to my existence that feels like it is only now showing signs of beginning to close in around my naive self, or at least preparing to begin closing in

when i think too hard about my classwork i feel overcome with dread, like everything is going to come apart for me & it is only a matter of time, & i feel intensely disposed to simply lie down & die

everything may come apart for me when i have so greatly acclimated myself to stability because i have been allowed to. my household is not "well off", nor is it particularly caring, nor ever really loving - but it has been stably apathetic, or apathetically stable.

my mind is a thing in the shape of the concept of stability. i am afraid of dismantling the layout of my room. i am afraid of staining a shirt. i am afraid of breaking a glass. i want to retain my array of symbols. i want to hew out some particular mode of existence & have it persist forever. to some extent, i want this present life of self-selected routines & intermittent walks for the rest of time - even if i have always imagined it, & wanted it, elsewhere. but in actuality this sense of dread always lied ahead

i'm afraid of the idea that the blankness i feel when i read this godforsaken .pdf of a textbook chapter on jurisprudence is the general forecast going forward

the nonchalance of the people around me, particularly the professors, all feels like a veneer over everyone having found something to cling to so that they are not abandoned on the streets & left to die in the cold. i guess they are all probably secure, though. they are all people who made a plan. i cannot take my eyes away from how much making a plan resembles killing a part of myself. i am afraid

0 notes

sluttywoozi · 9 months

Note

Hey hey lovely💗 how have you been? I seriously hope you've been taking care💗

Oh I missed you so much, I missed being here rambling about random things, but I'm pretty sure my college professors are trying to kill me cause omg I barely have time to breath these days😭

I had some time before going to fall asleep so I came to read your stories cause it bring me comfort and to check on you sweetie💗

Have you eat and hydrate? And tell me how have your days been? Anything that has made you really excited and happy? Any new inspiration lately?💗

Take care, pretty💗don't overwork yourself, always eat properly and hydrate, okay?💗I'm gonna show up again when I have more time and I hope you have a incredible time till there💗Don't forget that you're amazing and I admire you a lot💗

Here take my love in case you had some bad day💗💗💗💗💗

- 💗

omg hellooo!!

I've missed you too!! it's been a little crazy over here too, i'm only in two classes but both professors love homework so almost all my time has been either working or doing classwork

i'm so glad you had some time to yourself and honored that you used it to read my work and come talk to me 💖

i have been eating and drinking a lot of water! i just had my last day with the baby i've nannied for a year and the family gave me a few goodies including a new cup so i'm more hydrated than ever! i also recently decided to go back to school for something that i'm really excited about, idk how i'll afford it but we're gonna do it!!

omg also i matched with my first real crush on hinge and we've been chatting so that's crazy!!

i can't wait to see you again, i hope your professors ease up and you're able to relax!

ily 💖

#✨emily answers✨#💗 anon

1 note · View note

dolldoll5987 · 1 year

Text

Graduating high school is not worth celebration, it's worth the exact opposite.

As a senior in high school I get bombarded with questions like what I'm going to do after I graduate, like go to college or get a job. I've been suicidal since I was 11, all I want to do is die, which is what I've been trying to do for the last 7 years. I suppose my last fleeting hope was that after school was done I could finally just relax. Now I'm kinda hit with the pressure to do something else... when I don't want to. I mean, sure, being a productive and contributing member of society is all fine and brilliant when you actually have the will to. For the last 7 years all I've had the motivation to do is try to figure out how and get the courage to kill myself. I don't have the energy to go to school, but do because I have this crippling fear that if I miss just one day I'll fail and have to repeat this year of torture.

I suppose what I'm getting at is if all there is in life is to either get a job or go to school to be able to get a job you want (...depending what it is, I suppose), still labour in a way, all for money just to pay to live — what's the point if you don't want to live? Like, it's all work and payments for something I didn't ask for, and didn't want. Why would I put so much energy into that?

Also, I'd like to make a point to say that when I say there's nothing else in life besides that is hyperbolic in its own right. There are friends, family, hobbies/aspirations, whatever. None of these make me happy. I have few friends and no energy to socialise anyway, my family sucks, and I have no aspirations or hobbies. I mean okay I like reading, writing, drawing, and gaming and have a niche interests in things like criminology, forensics, medicine, science, and other stuff, but not enough to make it into a living. Well, maybe, but I definitely don't have the energy to. I'd need more school, and school is the definition of Hell for me. In a lot of ways it made my depression and eating disorder worst, although I do not blame them entirely for these events. I take blame where I need to. My fault for isolating myself (due to lack of energy to socialise, which isn't my fault, but I still made the choice to do what I did), my fault for resorting to an eating disorder as a desperate distraction and to feel good about myself for once. It's my fault, I get it.

Teachers and other staff ask me if I'm excited to graduate and I'm like. Well. I say yes but it's mixed feelings. It's odd, I hate school and want to get out, but when I do that I have nothing else. I don't have the smarts or motivation for college, and I don't see the point in getting a job to labour away and pay to live when I don't even want to be here anyway. I don't hate learning, I just don't like how schools teach. Maybe I'm pedantic about it, but there have been some teachers that give us easy work loads and easy classwork in itself and still managed to leave me feeling like my time was being used well there because 1) I had fun for once, and 2) I actually remembered what I learnt. I wish more people teach like they do. Now I just feel like a big ball of lost potential because I've had so many people tell me I'm smart and even at genius levels yet I never use it in a good way I always do it to detriment myself.

I don't know. Not everything has a good ending, especially not this. I plan on offing myself after I graduate, which is soon. I won't do it immediately after I graduate, probably.

I just. Ugh. I want to cry. I should be happy about graduating, but I can't be. All I can think about is how everyone else has their lives figured out - going to college, getting a job, whatever, while I'll be by myself with no friends, no life, no potential, and bored out of my mind but with no energy to start something. Even then, nothing interests me socially. I hate social interaction to the point of isolating myself entirely just to avoid it, which is a bad thing to do probably, but socialising causes me pain. I feel so different from everyone else and that I'm too weird and people are only ever nice out of pity or deception.

It seems that when I'm very bored, I get the most suicidal. With nothing to distract me I realise how dull and shallow my life is compared to everyone else's. Everyone else has friends, everyone else has at least some happiness, yet here I am with a chronic 😐 expression to the point people constantly ask what's wrong/if I'm okay when it's only my resting face. It's annoying having to always answer. Like... no, I'm not okay, but for the sake of this conversation, yes. I wish I could just disappear forever.

I don't want advice, I don't want help, I don't even want to make it better. I've been on meds and in therapy from ages 7-15, and it didn't help me at all, even made it worse sometimes. My life was doomed from the beginning, and since late 2019 it's gotten so, so much worse. Please, I just want it to end. When will the malnutrition that I've been experiencing for half a year finally just kill me? When will this all end? I want it to end. I want to die. Please.

0 notes

tsukisdiary · 2 years

Text

it's elven pm and everyone is talking about homework and I haven't even started like I haven't even pondered the idea of starting them. And it seems like everyone in these class gcs are just now asking, panicking, and rushing to do them. God, I hate classwork. And I think some teachers do too because they must know that is rushed, that is meaningless and stressful to most of us, and that over half of the class has looked at it for the first time the night before. And it's not, it's not mind-stimulating, it's not proving everything I can give, it's not showing them my potential, the depths of what I'm able to if tried, if prodded. And homework should do that but it doesn't, and I normally don't do homework, it feels more like exhaustion rather than the rebellion I used to feel in primary school. But I don't do homework, and when I do, it's ass, it's what I've put together five minutes before the revision or checking or deadline. And my work, or lack thereof, does not show anything about me, it does not say I'm too good for whatever my professors think of their classes, it does not say I'm too cool for them, it shows nothing, I'm proving nothing. And I know they wonder what the fuck I'm tired from if I don't do classwork, if I don't do projects, if I do nothing.

When I was graduating from the last mandatory bit of my education, my teacher looked at me and said that if she could, she'd make me fail, that it was an insult that I managed to pass years just by the information I retained the days I went to class, that my school demanded work from students and that the people that were graduating alongside me did more in a year that I in four consecutive years. And I only sat there and took it, biting my tongue from comments like "and yet I'm graduating, without having done shit you've asked me to". She looked at me one last time before whispering that indolence would one day kill me. I nodded, and we parted ways after she had to sit through the whole ordeal, probably swallowing bile as the physical reaction to seeing me, next to her hardworking students.

It's been a little over a year. I'm still the same. So whatever, whatevs. Maybe laziness will be my death, maybe it will be that combined with pride. And guess what? I'm okay with it. And no, I don't think I'm a hero standing up to a simple-minded constructed educational system, I do not. But I don't know, guess these are the thoughts of the anti-valedictorian.

0 notes

deadyetkawaii · 5 years

Photo

I’m uploading something?? WHAT!? Here’s my first project I did for my story boarding class. we had to create a story without any words.

Tumblr is being a butt and wont let me add all the slides SO look in the reblogs for the rest of em i guess thanks!

#original #storyboard #comic #wholesome shit #i guess lol #i didn't upload it earlier because i had a few more slides i wanted to finish but classwork has been killing me and afterparty came out #but maybe i'll come back to it

3 notes · View notes

books-and-catears · 3 years

Note

Hello, sweetheart!!!

How are you today? (◕ᴗ◕✿)

I saw your request open again sooooo....

The ask about Parasite! Little D with MC made me think about something...

What about a Venom!MC? More like the platonic version of Venom and Eddie, not the romantic canon one. Like they got Venom when they were on the human world, it's been a while and they started getting along pretty quickly. When they got to Devildom, the demons didn't know about the 'parasite' and MC and Venom decided to keep their little secret. But how and when would the brothers find out about Venom? And what would their reaction be? Of course, if it's not too much to ask it would be nice to also know the other characters' reaction as well! If it's not possible then only the brothers are fine! (Since it's Kinktober you can go crazy with it if you want to turn it NSFW

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°))

I don't know why but I imagine Venom!MC dynamic to be like that one TikTok audio that goes like:

MC: what do you think Venom (wackus bonkus)?

Venom: eat him/ peg him (you know for the possible nsfw version). (The original says kill him but we all know Venom is one hungry boi)

MC: Uh. You naughty Venom! (wackus bonkus.)

Don't forget to drink water and take breaks darling! Have a swell day!

BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA I TOOK MY SWEET TIME GETTING TO THIS ASK CAUSE THIS WOULD BE FREAKING PRICELESS! AHAHHAHAHA!!! THANK YOU FOR THIS! *hugs you forever*

All hail Venom! MC bwhahahahahaha! Also might be a little self indulgent so Luci and Belphie stans, I apologise for bullying your faves.

TW: Slight NSFW mentions

"Is this a joke? These demons think they can just summon us to hell without rhyme or reason?!" Venom snapped, growling with all his teeth out.

"Well can't exactly go back on a whim, so might as well deal with it, eh?" You sighed fixing your new uniform. It was too damn fancy and elaborate for you. And especially stuffy for Venom's taste.

"Ugh! This is hideous! How are you breathing in this?! MC take that off."

"We cannot go looking like a deliquent on our first day. Bear with it for a week okay? It'll loosen up eventually. Now, noone knows you're in me, so let's keep it that way for now, shall we?"

"Only if you let me play some .... practical jokes on these demons. Nothing too extreme I promise!"

"Sure but only if they deserve it. I'll even let you do a grand reveal if you behave."

Lucifer

"Hmm Lucifer, the oldest - what do you think Venom? Eat him/Peg him?"

"Ew. Smells like old men and drinking problems. He isn't even going to taste good. Stay away at all costs."

Lucifer gets suspicious pretty early on because is it really normal for humans to keep talking to themselves like this? You say it is, but he doubts it.

One day he assigns you extra classwork to finish in his office just so he can keep an eye on you. He pretends to step out for air, giving you an illusion that you're in the clear.

"Ugh! Why are we doing extra classwork?! Our scores are well above average, MC! What the hell does the old coot want?!"

"Ven! Get back inside Lucifer will be back any sec-"

And he chooses to walk in at the right moment. Ven just swims through air to growl and bare his teeth at him, while you desperately tell him to stop.

Lucifer just stands there in disbelief. "MC what's the meaning of this? I would think it's a demonic possession but I've never seen a demon like this." Is annoyed whenever Venom tries to play pranks against him but gets used to it.

Mammon

"What about Mammon, the second? He's not too bad is he? Eat him/Peg him?"

"Ooh this one's a moron! I like those kinds of men! Definitely peg material! And he seems to lose his shit around us so yes, cute!"

Mammon has a bad habit of barging into your room without knocking, so it really a surprise that he accidentally walked in while Venom was looming over your head?

And of course, Mammon's first reaction was to scream. "WAHHHHHH! ITS A DEVIL SLUG! A slug monster got to MC! Lucifer, Satan where are ya, we need help-"

"Shut your face before I gobble it up, Mr. Protector. You look especially tasty when you're scared." Venom wrapped himself around Mammon's mouth to stop his screaming.

"Enough, Ven. Let's not scare the demon to death. Mammon, this is my friend Venom, he's a parasite that lives inside me and he won't hurt you." You explain.

It takes you a good two hours to make Mammon understand the situation. And once he gets comfortable around Venom, he's constantly asking him to eat the witches he owes money too.

Leviathan

"That's Levi, the third, Lord of Shadows if you will. Eat him/Peg him?"

"Hehe he's the shy one that blushes when we merely hold his hand, isn't he? Definitely peg him! I wonder if his cheeks will burst with all the blushing!"

Levi regretted asking you to wait in his room when he saw Venom up and about staring and laughing at Henry 2.0 swimming around playfully. "Here, fishy fishy! Cute fishy!"

"MC!? MC WHAT'S THAT THING AND WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO IT?! GET AWAY FROM MY HENRY, YOU EVIL DARK BLOB!" Levi charges with his plastic TSL cosplay sword.

"Oh no no Levi, he means no harm! Ven doesn't eat fish, he just likes looking at them swimming around!" You explained hurriedly. "Ven is a friendly parasite!"

"Ohhh it's just like that anime 'Me and My parasite friends who's always hungry!' Levi laughs about it later. Becomes friends with Venom and blushes whenever he compliments him.

Satan

"And ahem that's Satan, the fourth. He loves books and cats and learning and he's also great at cooking and spells and-"

"Oh jeez, just peg him already. It's so obvious that you want to."

Satan also noticed you speaking to yourself head on. But he didn't even need to trick you to find out about it.

As a joke, he put his book on across you and said, "Hello other person MC keeps talking to. Good morning to you as well."

Venom shot straight out of your chest and giggled loudly. "I like this one. Keep this one, MC! You like this one right? I want this one too!"

"Oh shut up, Ven!" You tried to push him back inside. "Um don't mind him, he's just-"

"A parasitic friend you picked up near an research facility I believe?" Satan laughed. "I read about it last year. Didn't think you'd be one of the affected humans but I'm glad it's not as bad the reporters made it seem."

You hid your face in your hands, embarassed, "No. It's worse."

Asmodeus

"And there's pretty boy Asmo, the fifth? Thoughts? Eat him/Peg him?"

"He's a pretty one! Let's peg him what are we waiting for?!"

Asmo being the cheeky demon he is would mostly walk in while you're having this exact conversation with venom.

Almost as if he has some sixth sense that takes him to places where's he is being talked about. "Oh darling, all you needed to do was ask! Also I'm way prettier than my pictures you know?"

"Eek! Asmo!" You yelp in suprise but he's already cornered you, smirking.

"Eager are we? Let's get on with then! MC come on already! He's offering so nicely!"

"Oh we have a dear friend joining us? I don't mind at all! The more the merrier especially if you're involved, MC!" He laughs. You hate how Venom keeps dragging you to Asmo's shopping trips.

Beelzebub

"That's Beelzebub, the sixth and basically a sweet himbo-"

"He looks like he's strong enough to peg us in mid air but also sweet enough to get us pancakes later. So yes peg him."

Beel meets Venom when you you were working out with him and accidentally dropped a weight. It would have broken your foot if both Beel and Ven hadn't caught it in time.

He would be instantly protective of you if he didn't just see Venom help you. "Oh wow, is this how human defense mechanisms work? I've never seen this before!" He exclaims happily. "It even has a face. Hello?"

"Yeah he's mine. We're keeping him. We absolutely have to. We'd have to be a stone cold bastard not to."

He is literally so comfortable with Venom, even shares his favourite foods with him. And personally he is Venom's favourite.

Belphegor

"Belphegor, the seventh and Beel's twin. Eat him/peg him?"

"Isn't that emo guy who tried to kill you? And he's that sweet himbo's twin? Would eat him right now if he didn't smell like an evil gremlin."

Belphegor loved taking naps with you and Venom hated it. He remained most guarded during that time. In fact one time he was a bit too guarded and popped out of your back throwing Belphie off the bed in suprise.

"What the- is this creature what you humans call 'inner demons'? Because those teeth and eyes look like Halloween decorations." Belphie joked, but you had successfully scared him awake.

"I am going to eat him. I'm going to eat you whole you little shit-" You had to tell Venom that Beel would be sad. That is what saved Belphie from being an evening snack.

Absolutely doesn't get along with Belphie and does anything he can to sabotage whatever time you get with him.

#obey me #obey me satan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me beel #obey me asmo #obey me belphie #obey me levi #obey me imagine #obey me crack #obey me leviathan #obey me Beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me asmodeus

921 notes · View notes

thesquareinthecircularhole · 3 years

Text

hey stupid, i love you [MCYT: Dream x GN!Reader]

song: hey stupid I love you by jp saxe

warnings: fluff

im pretty sure i made this an gender neutral as possible but if there is an error lmk thanks bby :*

im in a simpin mood bby

as always, song lyrics in italics

i skipped a couple versus due to repetitiveness oops

this is the one i complained about losing, but it actually worked out bc i like this one better...less wordy

word count: ~2k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nothing's wrong, and it's not what I'm used to Oh, does it surprise you too? When it's simple, is it easier than it should be?

"Hey babe, are you okay? You've been quiet today," Dream practically pouted as he asked you. He loved the sound of your voice and while you definitely weren't giving him the quiet treatment, you sure weren't as talkative as you normally are.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just distracted thinking my thoughts." You smiled at him and leaned against him. He looked down at you and pecked your lips. You gave him a sweet kiss back. The smile he gave you made your heart boom. Loving him was as easy as eating a cake (because the usually analogy 'baking a cake' isn't true, its sometimes hard to bake a cake, especially when a hungry streamer keeps trying to eat the batter or start a flour fight).

"Anyway, don't you have a stream with the Dream Team to get ready for? One that starts in," you look at the clock on your phone, "three minutes ago?" The slight panic that crosses Dream's face makes you laugh loud. He gives you another kiss and in less than five seconds has practically launched himself across the house into his recording room. Your laughter follows him the whole way, a smile and blush upon his face.

Nothing's wrong, but when you're not in my arms I send voice notes, you send hearts And get quiet, and I know that means you miss me

Okay, granted, you were the one to remind him that he was streaming with his friends today and speedrunning, but you didn't expect it to last well over five hours. At the beginning you worked on your classwork for your [college degree of choice]. You got it done quickly, as it was nearing the end of the semester and most professors of yours were laidback and wanted you to study more than write nonsense papers (fictional you, i'm so jealous). Occasionally you would jump in fear when you heard Dream shout, still not used to it after years.

After finishing your classwork, you started cooking dinner. Soup was the vibe for the evening, and you had found a wonderful chicken and dumplings recipe a while ago that you wanted to try. You did have to go to the store for some of the ingredients, but luckily it only took you an hour. You can back and he was still streaming. It took about another hour for dinner to be done. You let it cool and prepared yourself a bowl. You set your laptop up and started watching Dream's stream. Hearing his voice made you miss him, so you pulled out your phone.

Going to the two of y'alls messages, you started making him a voice message.

"Hey baby, I made dinner, so don't play so long it gets cold. I love you! Kick the enderdragon's ass baby! Mwah."

You continued watching him stream, and he took a pause for a minute, his screen not moving from the create a new world screen and his mic muted. A couple seconds later you got spammed with every heart offered in the emoji index times what felt like a thousand.

He continued being quiet for a couple seconds, although he did unmute and continue playing, answering George's and Sapnap's questions of where he went with, "I had to take a message."

You're jealous, you shouldn't be I want you obsessively But I know how complicated it can get When you're not in front of me I know insecurities get in your head

Chat sometimes upset you. Sure, you got Dream, all of him, but sometimes the comments made by some of the more obsessives fans were a bit to much.

'With the way he killed those mobs you know he's got good fingers'

'His voice is hot so he must be'

'Heyo dream baby lemme see them feet'

Okay the last one was more weird, and actually turned out to be a joke from Quackity but anyway moving on.

He was your guy, and he promised himself to you, but sometimes he seemed to have a genuine connection with some of the sweeter and not gross ones. It made you scared that someone, one day, will swoop him off his feet with a comment and he’d leave you for them.

But I'm not gonna interrupt if you need to talk about it Roll my eyes, get offended by the way you doubt it You know you're mine, you just forget sometimes So promise me you won’t And you know I'll remind you when you think I don't

The stream ended a little under an hour later. Dream left his recording room, grabbed a bowl of soup, and found you in the living room, lost in thought. He plopped down right next to you.

“Talk to me baby.”

“About what?”

“Anything and everything.”

“Okay.” You’re quiet for a bit, despite his offering of listening. He knew you were gonna take him up on the offer, you just needed a bit of time, so he was going to wait patiently. He finished his soup quickly, he was much hungrier than he thought. He put the bowl on the coffee table and before he was all the way leaned back on the couch, you were leaning against him. His arms wrapped around you, your head was tucked in between his head and shoulder, and a blanket covered the both of you. You looked towards the blank tv screen but felt his eyes on you.

“I love you a lot. And I know you love me too, but I’m afraid I’m not enough. You have so many options, especially with your popularity online. I don’t know what I’d do if you left me, whether it be for someone else or just because you’re tired of me.” Dream waits for you to stop entirely, with you breathing heavily.

“Well, you’re right about one thing. I do love you, a lot. The rest of it is wrong and I’ll spend the rest of time telling you so.” Dream says, pressing several kisses against your forehead.

“Yeah I know it’s stupid to feel this way, but my anxiety gets the best of me. It’s stupid, I’m stupid.”

“First of all, you’re not stupid. Second, hey stupid, I love you.”

Nothing's wrong, I just get in my head too Can you reassure me you, you're still in it? I just wish you could lean in and kiss me

As much as Dream loved you and reassured you, sometimes he would get caught up in his thoughts too. The life of a streamer/youtuber, especially one with as much fame and subscribers as him, was rough. The constant need to feed his fans with entertainment and content, and the need for the content to satisfy his fans was stressful. He hates to admit it, but he some days he spent to much time working and not enough with you. He thinks you would be so much happier with someone without a tight schedule and without a large, intense fanbase. Any random person on the street would be better for you than him, he thinks.

When he gets into this headspace, the only thing that grounds him is your lips on his. When you kiss him, the clouds go away and all he can see is your eyes, as bright as the sun, and your smile, which can tempt even the purest.

Say nothing's wrong, tell me to settle down You do it better than I've ever known how Won't pull some tricks for attention But could I get a little now?

Now, everyone knows that Dream likes some attention. He especially likes attention from you. Good thing is you also like attention, especially from him. The not so good thing is both of y’all get distracted so bad, it’s almost too funny.

He tends to get your attention by tickling you, whether it be in the comfort of your home or in public. One day, when you guys were walking through town, you stopped at a flower booth and got to talking with the friendly and flirty florist gentleman. It had been a couple minutes, and Dream was really needing some love, but you continued chatting with the florist who was definitely going to ask for your number but you genuinely thought he was just being nice. Dream crept up behind you and placed his hands on your side. You froze for a moment and looked at him, confused. The smirk that crossed his face barely gave you a second to prepare as he tickled your sides. Your laughter filled the street as you turned around as he tickled you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, which got him to stop ticking you, and gave him a kiss. The two of you continued on your way, attached at the hip.

And one day, when you wanted his attention, it was after he was done recording a manhunt with his friends. The actual video had been done for a bit, but they were just fucking around in the minecraft world and talking to each other. You had had a not so nice day, and wanted the crushing weight of your boyfriend on top of you. You crept into his recording room and came to stand right behind his chair. Based on the conversation you could tell he wasn’t recording anymore, so you knew it was safe. Your hands started in his hair, trailed down to his face, and slid down his body till your arms were wrapped around him snuggly. Your head was placed on top of his.

“What are you doing?” he asked, and received no response. Instead, you began aggressively shaking him and the chair, turning it this way and that, making him slightly dizzy. His laughter filled the room, and he quickly ended the call. The two of you spent the next 12 hours cuddled in bed, leaving only for the necessities.

You're jealous, you shouldn't be I want you obsessively But I know how complicated it can get When you're not in front of me I know insecurities get in your head

Dream got jealous as well sometimes. You were beautiful and a lot of the time attracted the attention of random passerbyers. Those people, who you don’t even know, who lived normal lives where they didn’t have to spend every second worried that their face will be revealed to the public and suddenly all their fans from around the world will know what they look like or the general area in which they live, who don’t have to obey algorithms and bend to the will of the masses to make sure they get paid enough to live, who could give you a normal and safe life. Every time one looked at you with some attraction, he pulled you a bit closer and kissed you a bit harder.

But I'm not gonna interrupt if you need to talk about it Roll my eyes or get offended by the way you doubt it You know you're mine, you just forget sometimes So promise me you won’t And you know I'll remind you when you think I don't

Sometimes, Dream needed to rant. A long, hard, intense, rant. Sometimes it was about how someone accused him of cheating his speedruns. Sometimes it was about how someone said something nasty to him or one of his friends. Sometimes it was about a comment someone made about him or you that got on his nerves. When he needed to talk, you sat there and you listened. You did whatever he needed to get better, whether it was just listen or talk to find solutions. You did it because you know he would do the same for you. And afterwards, a cuddle session was a must.

How could you forget? I told you seventeen times before 7 AM I love you How could you forget? I told you seventeen times

The morning after rough days were one of the bests. Arms tangled together, legs tangled together, everything tangled together, no one able to tell where one started and the other ended. Lazy kisses pressed to faces, hands, necks, any part of skin the lips could touch. One particular morning you woke up earlier than he did. A quick kiss against his cheek woke him up, and he gave you the most love filled smile any man could do.

“Hey stupid,” you said, “I love you.”

#mcyt #mcyt x reader #dream x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #fluff #songfic

264 notes · View notes