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bangtans-momma · 6 months

Text

S͟a͟v͟a͟g̲e͟ L͟o͟v͟e͟

Pairing: Jimin X OC. Jungkook X OC

Length: 10,000+ words

Rating: 15+ (it has no sexual activity or extreme violence, but has adult themes like cheating, toxic relationship, pregnancy and swearing, some mention of sexual themes but not graphic)

TW/Content: Angsty,angsty fluff, sadness, anger, mild violence (punching), depression, low self esteem, toxic relationship, hateful words, gaslighting, emotionally abusive, jealousy, mentally abusive, arguing and shouting, OC is chubby, unrequited love (but not really), male best friend is always there, clueless best friends, cheating, pregnancy (not OC) fluffy best friend, swearing, bad body image, Angst with happy ending, feelings exposed.

Kissing and hugging, mention of sexual things but no actual sexual content.

(Maybe in a part two if I feel like it)

But Jungkook has soft dom energy in the way he talks to her and treats her.

OC and Jimin being savage loves in their own ways. Taehyung being her secret rant buddy, who listens to her melt downs.

Genre: Angst, Toxic relationship, break up, angsty with a happy ending. Best friends being clueless.

Authors note: Not proof read but checked quickly by myself, was written in a day so it just flew out of my head.

Capitals means they are shouting or screaming at each other, which means that when she tells Jimin off she is really MAD!

Wanted to prove I could write something without the story getting sexual or yandere etc. And I would SHARE IT!

Sorry about the font, but not going over it to change it now. Had trouble with copy and paste, but I like it this way!

Link to a savage love Drabble below.

Master List Link: here

Savage Love Master List: here

Second Part (Standing Next To You): here

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S͟a͟v͟a͟g̲e͟ L͟o͟v͟e͟

Flashback

"𝑰'𝒎 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒍𝒆𝒆𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅...."

𝑨 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒚 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒖𝒓𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔, 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆.

"𝑪𝑨𝑵𝑫𝑰𝑪𝑬! 𝑾𝑯𝑨𝑻 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲!”

𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒔 𝒖𝒑 𝒕𝒐 𝒖𝒔 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒃𝒔𝒐𝒍𝒖𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒇𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒎𝒆.

"𝑺𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒏'𝒕!"

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒆𝒙𝒂𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅.

𝑰'𝒎 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒌 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒃𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆.

"𝑯𝒐𝒘 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏? 𝑯𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒏'𝒕 𝒊 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒆𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒂𝒍𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒚? 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒚𝒆𝒕 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅'𝒕 ��𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒏 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏! 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓'𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆!"

𝑰 𝒚𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆, 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒅𝒐𝒏𝒆.

𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒏𝒐𝒘, 𝒊'𝒗𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒆𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉.

"𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆! 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆, 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅. 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒔! 𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒃𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕!“

𝑯𝒆 𝒆𝒙𝒄𝒍𝒂𝒊𝒎𝒔 𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒍𝒆𝒈𝒈𝒚 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅.

"𝑬𝑿𝑪𝑼𝑺𝑬 𝑴𝑬! 𝑰𝑻 𝑾𝑨𝑺 𝑵𝑶𝑻 𝑨 𝑶𝑵𝑬 𝑵𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑱𝑰𝑴𝑰𝑵! 𝑶𝑹 𝑳𝑰𝑬𝑺!"

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒔 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒆.

"𝑺𝒉𝒖𝒕 𝒖𝒑 𝑪𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒆”

𝑯𝒆 𝒈𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒉 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒓𝒚.

"𝑰 𝑾𝑰𝑳𝑳 𝑵𝑶𝑻 𝑺𝑯𝑼𝑻 𝑼𝑷! 𝑺𝑯𝑬 𝑫𝑬𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑽𝑬𝑺 𝑻𝑶 𝑲𝑵𝑶𝑾”

𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒙𝒄𝒍𝒂𝒊𝒎𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅𝒍𝒚.

𝑷𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒊𝒍𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒚 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒖𝒎𝒂 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏....𝑮𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕!

"𝑰 𝑺𝑨𝑰𝑫 𝑺𝑯𝑼𝑻 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲 𝑼𝑷!"

𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒄𝒉 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒅 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔, 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒈𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒚.

𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒗𝒆 𝒉𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒑𝒉𝒚𝒔𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒍 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆'𝒔 𝒂 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒉𝒆’𝒔 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒉𝒚𝒔𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒂𝒃𝒖𝒔𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆!

"𝑯𝑶𝑾 𝑫𝑨𝑹𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑮𝑬𝑻 𝑰𝑵 𝑴𝒀 𝑭𝑨𝑪𝑬!"

𝑪𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒑𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒑𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎.

"𝑫𝒐 𝑵𝑶𝑻 𝒕𝒐𝒖𝒄𝒉 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏! 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕!"

𝑯𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒉𝒂𝒊𝒓 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒔 𝒑𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌.

"𝑰'𝒎 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝑨𝒍𝒊𝒄𝒆, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑪𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒈𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒕𝒔 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏'𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒌𝒔 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒈𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒌𝒆𝒆𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒄𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒏 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒘𝒐 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒘. 𝑯𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒊𝒏𝒗𝒐𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒘𝒐 𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒌𝒔 𝒂𝒈𝒐. 𝑯𝒆 𝒌𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒊𝒔𝒉 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒐𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒘. 𝑺𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒏'𝒕"

𝑯𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒔 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆 𝒎𝒆.

"𝑭𝑶𝑹 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲𝑺 𝑺𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝑴𝑨𝑵𝑫𝒀! 𝑰 𝑺𝑨𝑰𝑫 𝑰 𝑾𝑶𝑼𝑳𝑫 𝑻𝑬𝑳𝑳 𝑯𝑬𝑹!”

𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒔 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅, 𝒔𝒐 𝑰 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒆.

𝑴𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌𝒔, 𝒊'𝒎 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒂𝒑𝒔𝒆, 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒊'𝒎 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒂 𝒑𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒄 𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒂𝒄𝒌.

𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒍𝒐𝒂𝒅𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝑻𝒂𝒆𝒉𝒚𝒖𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒎��𝒖𝒕𝒉 𝒈𝒂𝒑𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒏.

𝑬��𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒈𝒐𝒆𝒔 𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒆𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒑𝒔, 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒖𝒏 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒊'𝒎 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝒊𝒏 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆.

𝑾𝒉𝒚 𝒅𝒐 𝑰 𝒑𝒖𝒕 𝒖𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏?

𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒐𝒏 𝑨𝒍𝒊𝒄𝒆, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒖𝒕 𝒖𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔, 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒅𝒆𝒍𝒖𝒅𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍!

"𝑺𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒆?"

𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒆𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒊𝒎.

"𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒐𝒌𝒂𝒚, 𝒘𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔. 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝑰 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖, 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝑺𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕. 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒏𝒐 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏, 𝑰 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖. 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒈𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒖𝒑 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒈𝒐 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒍𝒖𝒃𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒆. 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒊 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒚𝒆𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒊 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒅𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂 𝒇𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒖𝒓, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅𝒏'𝒕 𝒔𝒍𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍 𝒂𝒏𝒅.."

𝑯𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒓𝒚 𝒈𝒂𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒂 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒂𝒄𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏.

𝑰 𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒊𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒏𝒂𝒑!

"𝑫𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕! 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑱𝑰𝑴𝑰𝑵! 𝑰 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑯𝑨𝑻𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼! 𝑮𝑬𝑻 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑯𝑬𝑳𝑳 𝑨𝑾𝑨𝒀 𝑭𝑹𝑶𝑴 𝑴𝑬! 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑫𝑰𝑫 𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺 𝑻𝑶 𝑴𝑬? 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑻𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑴𝑬 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝑺𝑯𝑰𝑻 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑴𝑨𝑫𝑬 𝑴𝑬 𝑭𝑬𝑬𝑳 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝑺𝑯𝑰𝑻. 𝑰 𝑾𝑨𝑺 𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺 𝑩𝑬𝑭𝑶𝑹𝑬 𝑰 𝑴𝑬𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼!”

𝑰 𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒂𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒆, 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒂 𝑪𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒆.

𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝑰 𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒏𝒂𝒑 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒄𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒓 𝒓𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒂𝒓𝒓𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅.

"𝑮𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒍𝒖𝒄𝒌! 𝑰'𝒎 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒈𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒃𝒚 𝒉𝒊𝒎. 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒈𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒂 𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒕, 𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓'𝒔. 𝑺𝒍𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒉𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒂 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒏𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅, 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔. 𝑻𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒘𝒐 𝒐𝒇 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏, 𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒈𝒏𝒂𝒏𝒕, 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝑺𝑻𝑫'𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒔𝒐 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒅. 𝑯𝒆 𝒈𝒂𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒆 𝒎𝒆 𝒅𝒆𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅, 𝒂𝒏𝒙𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒚𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇. 𝑩𝒆𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒆! 𝑩𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒓!"

𝑰 𝒔𝒄𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒊 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏, 𝑰 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒛𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰'𝒎 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒖𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒏𝒆.

"𝑮𝑶𝑶𝑫𝑩𝒀𝑬 𝑱𝑰𝑴𝑰𝑵! 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑺𝑯𝑶𝑾 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑭𝑨𝑪𝑬 𝑨𝑹𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑫 𝑴𝑬 𝑨𝑮𝑨𝑰𝑵. 𝑰'𝑴 𝑨𝑩𝑺𝑶𝑳𝑼𝑻𝑬𝑳𝒀 𝑫𝑶𝑵𝑬!"

𝑰 𝒔𝒏𝒆𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎, 𝑰'𝒎 𝒂𝒃𝒔𝒐𝒍𝒖𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈.

"𝒀𝑬𝑨𝑯 𝑮𝑶 𝑭𝑰𝑵𝑫 𝑱𝑼𝑵𝑮𝑲𝑶𝑶𝑲 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑨𝑳𝑾𝑨𝒀𝑺 𝑫𝑶! 𝑰'𝑴 𝑺𝑼𝑹𝑬 𝑯𝑬 𝑾𝑰𝑳𝑳 𝑴𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑭𝑬𝑬𝑳 𝑩𝑬𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑹! 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑯𝑨𝑽𝑬 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑩𝑨𝑩𝑳𝒀 𝑩𝑬𝑬𝑵 𝑺𝑳𝑬𝑬𝑷𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 𝑯𝑰𝑴 𝑨𝑵𝒀𝑾𝑨𝒀, 𝑰 𝑪𝑨𝑵 𝑻𝑬𝑳𝑳 𝑯𝑬 𝑾𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑻𝑶 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑾𝑯𝑶𝑳𝑬 𝑻𝑰𝑴𝑬. 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑫𝑬𝑭𝑰𝑵𝑰𝑻𝑬𝑳𝒀 𝑾𝑨𝑺𝑵'𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑴𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑳𝑨𝑺𝑻 𝑺𝑰𝑿 𝑴𝑶𝑵𝑻𝑯𝑺!”

𝑯𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒔 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆.

"𝑫𝑶𝑵'𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑨𝑳𝑲 𝑨𝑩𝑶��𝑻 𝑱𝑼𝑵𝑮𝑲𝑶𝑶𝑲 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑨𝑻! 𝑴𝑨𝒀𝑩𝑬 𝑰 𝑺𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑳𝑫 𝑯𝑨𝑽𝑬 𝑮𝑶𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑵 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 𝑯𝑰𝑴 𝑩𝑬𝑭𝑶𝑹𝑬 𝑰 𝑴𝑬𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼, 𝑺𝑶 𝑰 𝑾𝑶𝑼𝑳𝑫 𝑯𝑨𝑽𝑬 𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑮𝑶𝑻 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑨𝑺𝑺. 𝑨𝑺 𝑯𝑬'𝑺 𝑾𝑯𝑨𝑻 𝑨 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑳 𝑴𝑨𝑵 𝑨𝑪𝑻'𝑺 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬. 𝑵𝑶𝑻 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑰𝑨𝑳 𝑪𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮, 𝑬𝑴𝑶𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑳𝒀 𝑨𝑩𝑼𝑺𝑰𝑽𝑬, 𝑮𝑨𝑺𝑳𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑨𝑺𝑺!𝑰 𝑯𝑨𝑽𝑬 𝑵𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑪𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑶𝑵 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑵 𝑻𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑮𝑯 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑫𝑬𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑽𝑬𝑫 𝑰𝑻. 𝑺𝑶 𝑲𝑬𝑬𝑷 𝑴𝒀 𝑩𝑬𝑺𝑻 𝑭𝑹𝑰𝑬𝑵𝑫𝑺 𝑵𝑨𝑴𝑬 𝑶𝑼𝑻 𝑶𝑭 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑺𝑻𝑫 𝑹𝑰𝑫𝑫𝑬𝑵 𝑴𝑶𝑼𝑻𝑯! 𝑮𝑶𝑶𝑫𝑩𝒀𝑬 𝑨𝑺𝑺𝑯𝑶𝑳𝑬!“

𝑰 𝒚𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒑𝒖𝒔𝒉 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒇𝒇, 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒌𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕!

𝑰 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝑻𝒂𝒆𝒉𝒚𝒖𝒏𝒈 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒂 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒔 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒌 𝒐𝒇𝒇, 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒕𝒐 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝒐𝒇𝒇.

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝑰 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝑪𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒄𝒆'𝒔 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎, 𝑰 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒑𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎.

𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒌𝒆𝒆𝒑𝒔 𝒎𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒅 𝒉𝒊𝒈𝒉, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒅𝒐, 𝑰'𝒎 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆.

𝑰'𝒎 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐𝒐 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝒂𝒔 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒍𝒌 𝒐𝒇𝒇, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒐 𝑱𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒊𝒔𝒏’𝒕 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎.

𝑵𝒐𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆!

========================================

All I can do is sob and I can't think of anything else, I can't sleep, I haven't showered or bathed in four days and I haven't thought of eating either, I tried to but it tastes like cardboard.

I feel like I just got out of a fever dream, one of my own stupid making.

I bet I look dreadful, I know my eyes are swollen and bloodshot and my face is definitely all puffy and red, I know I’m looking awful.

My hair is probably looking like a literal bird's nest right now and my eyes will also be looking black too from zero sleep.

I bet I look like the crypt keeper right now, but a fat one!

I muted my phone calls at first, then I turned it off where there were annoying notification sounds coming from all my social media too.

Some randoms I didn't even know had been messaging me, I know they are just trying to get the dirt on the absolute shit show that is my life right now.

I know they all filmed what has to be the most humiliating moment of my life, I hope my brother doesn't see it but I bet Jungkook heard about it from Taehyung who was there too.

Taehyung was a good friend to me but it was secret because he was my fellow rant buddy, he knew things I couldn’t tell the others.

So that means Jin probably does know.

I don’t want any lectures or pity parties.

I cringe knowing that everyone is gonna say I told you so, but really they all don't know the truth of why I stayed with him.

Someone was banging on my door for half an hour yesterday but I didn't answer it, just in case it was Jimin.

As I didn't want to see him or listen to his gaslighting ass.

He tried knocking on the door and calling all day Sunday after his baby momma and her friend had told me what he had done.

This is the thing he couldn't ever fix, not this time...It's permanent.

And my toxic nightmare is finally over...It’s finally done.

Why does he always do this to me?

He always cheats on me and then comes back telling me that he was wasted, drunk or the woman came onto him.

Then he manipulates me, lies, gas lights me and then cries if I don't listen to his apologies.

He knows how much it messes with my head, with my body image, especially when the women are tall, model looking and slim.

I'm short and also chubby, I wear glasses and wear cute and comfortable clothes, not short tight dresses.

Someone is currently banging on my door again and I just pull the quilt over my head trying to hide from the whole world.

I can hear someone shouting but I just put my hands over my ears and hum childishly under the blankets wanting the shouting and banging to stop.

When the banging stops I sigh, why don't they get that I don't want anyone's pity or fake sad faces, I don't want anyone asking me bullshit questions under the guise of being nice just so they can get the tea about my trauma.

And I definitely don't want to see Jimin.

I don't want to talk about how my heart has been ripped from my chest and stomped on, and not just by Jimin.

Or how there is no coming back from this, no lie or manipulation can make this go away, it's the permanent kind of mistake that I don't want to live with or have to deal with, not anymore.

I can't keep my mind occupied from what really torments me, I usually distract my mind with the drama Jimin brings me but not anymore, this is too much.

Jimin made his bed and he can damn well lay in it, we are done and I'm finally grieving the utter disappointment, disaster and despair that my relationship with him has been.

This whole relationship has damaged my soul and will leave a permanent mark.

Toxic wasn't a strong enough word to describe what our relationship was.

When I jumped into this relationship it was to forget someone else, but it never worked.

I’d never have to be there waiting for him to come home from the club anymore, or knowing I’m sleeping alone yet again.

Calling him only to get voicemail again or texting and seeing that he’s left me on read for the thousandth time.

Having people DM me to tell me that they are sleeping with Jimin or that they have just seen Jimin cheating with someone.

Or the multiple women’s scents lingering on his clothes, the occasional makeup smears on his shirt.

The marks he insists are scratches or pinch marks from working out.

My heart is no longer in my chest and I feel hollow and empty, but I also feel a strange calm, a feeling of relief that I can finally break free from this toxic and painful farce of a relationship.

It's cathartic and it feels like I have broken free from him mentally, emotionally and physically.

I'm grieving the painful loss but I'm scared of being alone after all my friends left or betrayed me because of him and of course some left because of me staying with him after his cheating.

It's been three years of me eating away my sorrows, crying into my best friend's arms, getting medication to deal with my depression and anxiety because of the pain and suffering.

Three years of my body looking worse and me not caring about my appearance anymore, because that's how I feel inside...Worthless and hollow.

Like I would never deserve or get the man I really wanted, he’s proven time and time again that he only wants to be my best friend.

When I think about it I don't ever remember a time when Jimin wasn't hurting me or making me feel like a piece of garbage.

Our honeymoon period was about six months and then it went to shit, then I found out he had cheated.

My friends all warned me away from him when I was in my first year of college and I should have listened, I was stupid and thought I could see the best in people.

One by one my friends had arguments with me about him, lost interest because of my depression and me not going out much anymore, or they slept with Jimin too.

The only ones I still see are my brother Seokjin and my best friend Jungkook, even though they don't see me as much due to them having arguments with Jimin about how he treats me.

Taehyung is sometimes still around when we are together as a group due to Jungkook and Jin though.

I see Taehyung on my own sometimes because he knows my big secret. He was there at a really bad time for me one night and saw my terrible meltdown.

No one else knows he is my rant buddy though, not even Jungkook or Jimin.

But I don't see Yoongi or Namjoon anymore because they detest Jimin.

I have lost count of the amount of times Jin had Jimin by his shirt threatening to punch his lights out.

Jungkook punched him once for sleeping with my other best friend Sharmin, they were doing it behind my back for six months.

This was at the beginning of the second year of our relationship.

My other childhood friend Denise slept with him on a drunken night out too, it was the night that I went to my auntie's wedding with Jin and Jungkook.

Jimin didn't want to come to the wedding with me because my family really hates him and he refused to be judged by them.

I wasn't aware that they all knew he was a cheater because Jin had told them.

That incident with Denise was the first time I was aware of him cheating on me, others already knew he was a cheater and they all tried to shield me from it.

They tried to force Jimin to break up with me but he never did, he would just goad them and tell them to fuck off.

It’s why Yoongi had punched him, he was vile about it and had got up in Yoongi’s face too.

The others knew because they had caught Jimin in the act multiple times, they had all threatened him, had him by the throat and had even punched him.

A mutual friend of all of ours Taehyung took a picture of them kissing in the club that night and had sent it to Jungkook’s phone, who totally gave it away by the look on his face and I found out because I grabbed his phone feeling worried for him.

It was then that he told me everything and explained how it wasn't the first time, I also found out that day that Jimin was cheating on me the whole time.

He promised to change and I believed him like a stupid idiot, I clung to a useless pipe dream.

Should've known better.

Jungkook has been my best friend since we were six and we have both grown up together, we went through our teens learning and making mistakes.

We had shared our first kiss when we were 13, a peck and it was a dare whilst we were ditching at his house and Jungkook was a little awkward for a few weeks after but we got over it.

Nothing else like that happened for at least a year after, I think we were fifteen when it started to happen again.

Both of us started having a rebellious stage that sort of started when we were thirteen but got worse when we were both sixteen.

We were bunking off school and daring each other to do things, getting drunk and smoking weed.

We once went skinny dipping because of a dare and another time I had to flash him, we had our first French kiss together at 16 too and we made out grinding on each other when we were wasted too, but Jungkook obviously didn't remember it because he got a girlfriend two weeks later.

We are the kind of friends who are comfortable cuddling and sharing a bed, telling each other our secrets and dreams.

I had a huge crush on him all through my childhood and teen years, by the time I was sixteen I knew that I was totally in love with him.

I lamented the whole thing and tortured myself about telling him, I was worried that I would lose him.

I was finally going to tell him on my seventeenth birthday after my other friend Denise told me to go for it, but a few days before I was going to surprise him he got a girlfriend and my heart literally broke into pieces.

I stayed being his friend and had to watch him be with another girl, so I had to learn to separate my crush from my friendship.

The only boyfriend I have ever had was Jimin.

I told Jungkook I had a boyfriend when he asked me what the surprise was but I didn't have one.

I lied when he got his first girlfriend and wasn't spending as much time with me, by the time he finished with the girl I just said I split up with the fake boyfriend.

I also lied and told him I had sex with that boyfriend before I met Jimin, I didn't though.

He was disappointed at me for staying with Jimin and our relationship suffered a lot because he would get angry at me every time I forgave Jimin.

Jungkook would argue with me, with our hurt feelings he would stay away for a few days, then come back knowing how hurt I would be to lose him too.

========================================

I panic when I hear the keys unlock my front door, wondering who the hell would have the spare keys.

Who would be able to get them from my mother?

I hope it's not Seokjin as he will kill Jimin this time and I don't want him to get arrested due to me.

I grip on to my quilt when I hear the footsteps approaching, I don't want anyone to see me like this.

"Princess?"

I breath hitches immediately and I hear him sigh, he tries to pull the quilt from me.

"Baby, come on it's okay, let me see you"

I pull the quilt from my head and my lip quivers when he looks down to me with sad eyes.

"Oh my Princess, come here"

He pulls me into his arms and I straddle him crying my heart out, he smooths my back softly rocking me.

"It's okay Baby, it's gonna be okay. I'm here now and I'm gonna take care of my Princess"

Jungkook has come like he usually does. Why does he always come to save me, comfort me and look after me?

I don't deserve his kindness and love.

He's had to put up with this kind of shit for the three years of me being with Jimin and he still hasn't left this friendship.

"I heard from Taehyung that you had a huge argument in college with Jimin, he only picked up some details, I'm so sorry Baby. You don't deserve this kind of pain, my Princess. I tried calling you and texting and you didn't answer, I got really worried when you didn't answer the door to me Baby. I had to go get the keys from momma when you didn't answer the phone or the door"

He caresses my hair as he carries on gently rocking me, he's always called my Mother momma too.

"He...He...J-Jungkook..He..I.."

That's it I start sobbing again.

"It's okay Baby, you don't have to talk about it yet, don't upset yourself"

He coos at me kissing the top of my head.

"Don't cry Princess, it hurts my heart, please don't cry"

He sounds forlorn when he talks to me, it’s like he is in pain too.

My cries eventually turn into shudders and I calm down.

I must have fallen asleep in his arms because when I open my eyes again it's dark outside.

He must be stiff from holding me in the same position for so long.

"Are you awake?"

I hear him whisper and I nod into his chest.

"Shall we get you something to eat, and don't say no because I know you haven't ate anything in days, I know you by now"

He quietly says into my hair.

"Not hungry"

I mumble into his chest and he tuts at me.

"Baby, you have to eat! Now I'm gonna help sort you out and we are gonna have something to eat okay!"

Jungkook scolds me and I sigh and slowly start to nod because I know he won't take no for an answer.

"Let's run you a bath first and then get you into some comfy pyjamas, then I'm ordering us some takeaway, okay Princess"

I just mumble okay into his chest.

Jungkook places me on the sofa and goes off to run me a bath, I hear the water running and him moving about.

But being left to my own thoughts gets me crying again, by the time he comes back I'm in a state again.

"Oh my Baby! Come here!"

He says sadly pulling me into his arms picking me up, I cling to him like a koala and just sob.

I think I'm crying for many reasons, the reason I got into the relationship in the first place, the constant cheating, the outcome of said cheating, finally being done with the relationship.

How unloved, drained and damaged he has left me feeling and me feeling like I'm actually going to be free from it, it's finally over.

It's like I feel utter relief, but I'm numb because I carried on with this shit show for only one reason and now I have to live with my thoughts again, my pain.

"Come on my Princess, I'm going to help you alright. Is that okay? I won't look at you, but you need to wash and get into some clean clothes. Is that okay?"

I don't reply at first and just panic in his arms, he can't see me with no clothes on, he will be disgusted and think I look horrible.

He only saw me in underwear a few years back, once when I flashed him as a teen and once naked in the shower by mistake when I was about nineteen, I've put on weight since then.

"Princess?? Answer me! Words...Is that okay?"

Jungkook has a stern voice when he asks me and I just nod in his chest.

"Words Baby"

"Hmm okay, y-yes"

I mutter quietly.

"Okay let's go to the bathroom"

He softly replies, pecking my hair.

Jungkook puts me down and I just stare at the ground feeling flustered and embarrassed.

"Arms up Baby, good girl"

I slowly put them up and he slowly pulled my hoodie off.

Then he reaches for my t-shirt and I start to panic because I have no bra on and he is going to see my chubby belly too

Grabbing on to the bottom of my t-shirt to stop him he tuts at me.

"Princess! Are you gonna do it yourself? What's wrong?"

I shake my head and tears start to drop from my eyes.

"Y-You can't see me, I'm gross! J-Jimin said he only cheated because I've turned into a fat pig and I look disgusting! I d-don't want you to be d-disgusted by me or my fat!”

He now looks really angry with me and he cusses loudly.

"He fucking said what?! How dare he talk about my Princess like that! I'm gonna punch his lights out when I see him next!!"

Jungkook looks furious and I start worrying that he is going to get in trouble and I'm not worth getting arrested for.

"NO!! JUNGKOOK! You can't get arrested because of me! I'm not worth it!"

I panic and he just sighs at me.

"You ARE worth it! To ME you are worth it! You are my beautiful best friend and I would go to jail...for you"

He tells me with no hesitation in his voice.

"Now stop being stupid, I could NEVER be disgusted by you! Come on, I won't look! Let's get you in the tub before it gets cold"

Jungkook adds pulling my top off looking me in my eyes, my arm goes to my belly immediately but he doesn’t say anything.

He just kneels down and tugs at my leggings looking to the side, then he gingerly takes my socks off.

Only my panties are left so he quickly yanks those down and stands up only looking me in the eyes.

"Come on Baby, get in the tub"

I quickly get in and pull my knees up to my chest, he gives me a small smile and nods to himself in reassurance, picking up my dirty clothes to put them in the washing basket.

"The sponge and body wash is there. I will help you do your hair first okay. Then you can wash yourself, alright Princess"

He quietly says pulling the shower attachment to rinse my hair, I sigh as he runs his fingers through my long tresses.

Stopping he puts shampoo on and massages it in making me hum and put my head back.

"Does that feel relaxing Baby?"

He gives me a little chuckle as I nod.

After finishing my hair he tells me to wash my body and he's going to go order some food.

I nod and gingerly pick up the sponge washing myself all over, after I'm finished he knocks back on the door and asks if I'm ready to get out.

I reply that I am and he walks in holding up a towel and wrapping me up in it.

Then he picks me up and walks me into my room.

He proceeds to dry my hair first and then tells me to dry my body, he goes off when the door buzzer sounds off.

I get myself dried and look at the loungewear set he has set down on the bed for me.

I grab the top first and quickly put it on, then I quickly pull on the bottoms.

Jungkook walks in just as I finish and gives me a small smile.

"Let's put your hair in a plait or something first. The food is here Baby, so let's hurry up and go eat"

I nod and he comes over to comb through my knotty hair, then he does it in a side plait.

Afterwards we sit down to eat, well Jungkook eats and then forces me to eat by feeding me himself when he sees that I just push my food around on my plate.

When he is satisfied that I have eaten enough he cleans the dishes and we snuggle up in my room to watch one of my comfort films.

We watch spirited away, he knows it won't trigger me or remind me of Jimin because he never watched anime with me, he hated it and called it childish.

As I cuddle up to Jungkook I wonder how I can be so lucky to have such a great best friend.

He has always been there for me, he has never left me even after the arguments we have had about Jimin.

Jungkook even put up with Jimin's horrible attitude every time he came to mine, with the constant sarcastic comments and the loud scoffing every time Jungkook talked to me.

He ignored it all just to make me happy.

He came on my birthday to see me, on Christmas days too and never forgot any important events, not like Jimin did.

Jungkook has even put me above the few girlfriends he has had and finished with them when they got jealous of our relationship, one demanded for him to stop seeing me and he refused and finished with her the next day.

He refused to go to any dances with girls that asked in high school too because he would always pgo with me.

They didn't like him calling me Princess at all or hugging me goodbye or pecking my head, or when he would hold my hand.

Or when he would drop a date to run to me because of Jimin cheating again, when he would tell them he couldn't spend Sundays with them because it was our day together.

I sometimes feel really bad anxiety and guilt about what he has given up due to me, am I stopping him from being happy, from finding love?

I actually told him this once, to stop finishing with his girlfriends because of me and he said if they didn't like his Princess then they aren't the one for him, that they have to be able to deal with the fact that his best friend is a woman.

All of his relationships were short and he told me he never loved them, that it was easy to choose me over them.

But I still feel riddled with an uncomfortable guilt about ruining his relationships and interfering with his dates too.

I feel like I'm subconsciously trying to keep him to myself or that I'm messing with his relationships on purpose because of my own problems and feelings.

That I was toxic because I stayed with Jimin not only because I was trying to forget Jungkook but because he would come comfort me and spoil me for weeks after Jimin had cheated.

========================================

Jungkook has stayed with me all week, he even called the college for me and got me my notes from any classes I needed.

He has been a godsend and an Angel like he always is.

He even spoke to Seokjin and my mother when they came round and I didn't want to talk to anyone yet.

I felt embarrassed because they were all right about Jimin and I had stubbornly ignored all the talks and advice.

Jungkook knew that there was a few videos going around and told me people were actually on my side, but I didn't want to relive it.

Apparently no one at college was saying bad things about me, he told me that they are mad at Jimin for how he treated me AND Candice.

I told him that I still needed a little time and that I wasn't ready to go back and hear the gossip yet.

Jimin tried knocking on the door twice over the last week and Jungkook said I didn't want to see him anymore.

When I finally texted him to come get his things he must have thought he could get in and gaslight me again, but he was definitely not happy when Jungkook was the one that came to the door with a box of his belongings.

He just got into a fight with Jungkook at my front door now too, his attitude stinks.

It happened right after he handed Jimin's things to him in a box because I definitely didn't want to.

Jimin clearly wasn't happy that Jungkook was still with me and had just answered the door in just a pair of sweats and socks with no top on.

Jungkook punched him hard giving him a black eye after he started goading him saying that he must have finally hit it and saw how good my fat ass bounces when you hit it from the back.

That I was really good at sucking dick and that maybe he can finally feel what it's like for me to deep throat him, he was vile with his words.

After that he said that he was glad that Jungkook could finally get with me after pining after me for so long and how horrible it must have been for Jungkook having to listen to him fuck me raw all those times he slept over.

Then I gasped when he said that he made sure that I used to scream extra loud the nights Jungkook stayed over, just to give him something to wank off to, where he felt sorry for him.

That he stayed with me just to piss Jungkook off and how he always used to laugh with his friends when he used to see how sad and love sick he was over me. Jungkook totally lost it punching him again making his nose bleed.

He was absolutely fuming when he slammed the door in his face, it made a picture fall on the floor and I could see how furious he was as he paced around the room.

I just walked over and cuddled him, it stopped his pacing, luckily it calmed him down enough to not go beat Jimin's ass, because he looked ready to go back to the front door and kill him.

When I asked him if he was okay he just kissed me on the head and then nodded silently, then quietly saying he just needed a few minutes alone, then he walked off to the bathroom slamming the door hard.

I sat there feeling really uncomfortable because of what Jimin had just said to Jungkook, surely Jungkook doesn't feel that way about me, he would have told me...Wouldn't he?

He always told me everything, we never kept secrets from each other.

Why was Jimin saying those things?

I knew Jimin was jealous of Jungkook and that's all it sounded like up until the fight I last had with him and he had mentioned Jungkook in jealousy.

But what Jimin just said to him was too much, what does he know that I don't?

What did Jimin see that I didn't?

I know that I have always loved Jungkook but he never felt that way about me, did he?

When Jungkook doesn't come out of the bathroom I quietly walk over to the door on top toes, I’m about to knock but I pause when I hear him sniffling and clearly crying.

Why is he crying?

Do I still knock? What if he's crying because he can't take my shit anymore and all of this has finally gotten to him?

I pick up the courage to finally knock after agonising about whether to disturb him or not.

"Jungkook? Please let me in"

I plead with him, feeling guilty that he's crying because of Jimin and what he just did.

He goes quiet and I hear the tap turn on and water splashing, then I hear him let out a loud sigh.

When he finally opens the door I can clearly see that he has been crying, his eyes are red and puffy, his nose red.

He looks so down and sad when he looks at me though, I frown at his defeated demeanour.

I absolutely hate seeing him cry, Jungkook has never been one to shy away from his emotions but it has always made me cry whenever I saw him crying.

Cuddling him immediately because I can't bear to see him suffering or sad, I fling my arms around him.

His arms go around me squeezing me tightly and I hear him sniffle again.

"Jungkookie please don't cry! I hate seeing you cry Kookie. Please tell me what's wrong, what's upset you?"

I ask him mumbling into his muscular torso.

"I..I can't Princess...I can't tell you. I don't want to ruin our friendship, I don't want to lose you"

Jungkook sounds so broken as he replies to me, I'm worried that he has betrayed our friendship in some way and is too scared to tell me.

"Kookie, nothing would ever make me stop being your friend. You are my person, my everything and my soulmate. You have been there for me when everyone else betrayed me or hurt me. You know nearly all my secrets and I know yours! The only ones I haven't told you about were for the sake of our friendship. I know our friendship has been strained over the last three years because of Jimin, but you have always been there for me, even when you were mad at me, you still came back to comfort me"

I tell him still hugging him.

"Not ALL my secrets Princess, that's why I can't tell you and what do you mean for the sake of our friendship?"

He finally sighs, squeezing me a little tighter, but sounds puzzled when he asks me.

"Oh..Umm I'm not sure whether it's even worth me telling you now as it doesn't really matter because I can't go back in time and change anything"

I mumble into his chest feeling shy and too scared to tell him.

"Baby, just tell me. If it was so long ago then what does it matter?"

I sigh, biting my lip and wondering if I should just tell him.

"I...Please don't leave me if I tell you, I can't take you leaving me too Jungkook, promise me. And technically it started when I was a child but it's not long ago too as it has still not ended. It’s still relevant”

I inhale a big intake of air after he promises that he won't leave me, I finally tell him what I have hid from him for sixteen years.

"I had a huge crush on you all through my childhood and teenage years. But when I was sixteen I realised that I actually loved you romantically after we did that dare and kissed and got off with each other when we were drunk, but you acted like you forgot. I was going to finally tell you later on when I was seventeen after agonising about it but...but you got a girlfriend a few days before I was going to tell you. I was going to surprise you in a cute way but it was too late, so I lied when you finally asked what my surprise was and I told you I had a boyfriend, but I didn't. I...I was also a virgin and hadn't ever been with anyone else or had a boyfriend when I met Jimin when I was nineteen. You were the only person I had kissed or had ever done anything sexual with. I stayed with him because I didn't want to ruin our friendship and every time you got a new girlfriend I would just forgive Jimin because it hurt me too much to be left with my thoughts of you being with another woman. I have always felt guilty about it and felt like I was ruining your real chance at love. So I just stayed with Jimin because you kept losing your chance at love because of me being a fucking screw up and I knew you couldn't possibly love someone who looked like me. All of your girlfriends were so beautiful and looked like models, I knew I stood no chance because I'm small, not pretty and dumpy. I'm not them. I also walked in on you having sex with your girlfriend a few days later when I was seventeen and cried for a whole week. I lied and said I had the flu and didn't come to school for a whole week”

I stop and it's totally quiet, he doesn't say anything for a few minutes and neither do I.

I'm just waiting for him to walk out on me and tell me he could never love me like that.

"Oh Princess! I'm so sorry!"

He suddenly starts crying again, but he is not just crying he's sobbing.

"I..Th-That is all my fault! I..I listened to a friend who told me to get a girlfriend to try to get over liking you. I didn't like her, I just didn't want to fuck up our friendship..and.. and he said I had to get over you. Because you clearly weren't interested like that, especially after you didn't acknowledge our drunken dare I thought you didn't remember either. OR that you wanted to forget it! When you lied and said you had a boyfriend, that you had had sex. I was so hurt and in my anger I slept with...with that g-girl! It was dreadful and I felt awkward doing it with someone I didn't love. WHY? WHY DID YOU LIE? WHY TORTURE YOURSELF AND STAY WITH JIMIN BECAUSE OF ME? YOU HURT YOURSELF AND ITS ALL BECAUSE OF ME!"

He gets louder as he starts to sound almost angry with me.

"I lied because it fucking killed me Jungkook and my friend said that I should really try to get over it and realise that you only loved me as a best friend! I couldn't understand how we always ended up doing things when we were drunk or daring each other but acted normal when we weren't. I saw you two all over each other on the bed the day before I told you and lied that I had sex, I went to your house and ran out when I caught you. You must have liked her or you wouldn't have been kissing her like that Jungkook. And you never told me you liked me either and after we kissed that time when we were thirteen too, you also acted like it was a mistake! And what friend?"

I exclaim back as he is not going to just lay this at my front door!

"It was Hoseok! What does it matter now?"

He scoffs at me and I chuckle sarcastically now, he has to be kidding.

This has to be a cruel joke, Hoseok?

"You do know that Hoseok kept asking me out and I refused him loads of times! I even shouted at him one time that I was already in love with someone else. I got so exasperated with his persistence and even though I didn't admit it he guessed it was you and I just walked off without confirming it. He did that because he was mad that I refused him so many times, I hope you know that! And you had so many girlfriends over the years and kept talking about your great sex life in front of me! Even before I got with Jimin! SO WHY THE FUCK WOULD I THINK OTHERWISE JUNGKOOK?”

I yell at him, sounding exasperated, throwing my arms up.

He looks really shocked at what I just said, then his whole expression darkens and he now looks really angry.

"That piece of shit! If I ever see him again I'm gonna punch him! After you got that boyfriend I tried to act like a normal friend because I thought you didn't like me either. And I only did that the last three years because Jimin would constantly talk about doing sexual things with you every time he spoke to Taehyung in front of me. Or when I would come over even. And I literally hate fucked those women where I was so mad all the time. I never told any of them that I loved them, I always left them when they tried to tell me to stop talking to YOU! Loads of them demanded that I choose them and I NEVER DID ALICE! I CHOSE YOU! I never did because...because I.."

Jungkook is exclaiming really loudly at me before his defeated voice drops off getting quieter.

He sighs, running his hand over his face.

"And do you know I haven't slept with Jimin for about six months! I told him to prove he loved me. And every time he cheated again I barely went near him for ages. So as you could imagine it was a lot of time with no sex. Because of what Jungkook?”

I’m so exasperated with this whole thing and it shows when I talk.

But when I ask him the last question I go dead still waiting for him to answer, it feels like ages before he finally does answers.

"Because...Because I love you Alice, I have loved you since we were kids. But I was scared to lose you and I didn't think you wanted me like that. When I kissed you that day when I was thirteen I felt so happy, but I was also scared that you would think it was a mistake and stop being friends with me. I even panicked that night when you slept over, because you almost caught me having a wet dream about you and I thought you heard me! So I joked off the kiss the next day so I wouldn't get hurt or that you would think I was moaning your name because of that! Then as we got older even though our dare's were getting more sexual you always talked about crushes and wanting to get a boyfriend one day, that you would have one who would be your best friend. But I didn't think you meant me, I thought you were going to get a new best friend and forget about me. And my friendship with you was always special to me”

He pauses his actual rant running his fingers through his hair then he carries on sighing.

"When you got with Jimin and I had to see you kiss him for the first time I was so upset I ran off and I think Jimin saw me and realised that I loved you. That's why he said all those things! He would also start grabbing you and kissing you on purpose to see my reaction, he even used to look right at me or smirk at me. I thought it was because he knew I hated him for cheating on you, but it was to flaunt it in my fucking face! Do you know how that felt, to watch him treat the woman I loved for so long like that! Did you know that I almost left here for a once of a lifetime internship about two years ago, I couldn't watch you two together anymore. But he cheated with Sharmin just before I was going to leave and you were so upset that I couldn't leave you in that state! So I bailed on them and lost the internship! But he would always goad me saying things like you had just had make up sex and was a little sore and horrible things like that. That the neighbours complained last night because of you screaming. But now I know it was all fucking lies!"

His hands are moving everywhere as he speaks, he looks so frustrated and angry.

I'm about to reply and he starts ranting at me again, unloading everything.

"I feel like I have been fucking stuck in limbo since I was a teenager! Never being able to move on because I can't love anyone else! It’s like we were in an emotional relationship. There is no one else I can imagine having kids with or marrying, no one else I could ever imagine living with because in my imagination and dreams it's always you!They are just never you and they never will be you. It's why I always picked women that I wasn't really that attracted to and that looked the furthest thing from what you looked like! I didn't want to feel like I was using them as a replacement or as a substitute! Because no one could ever replace you in my mind”

He looks really hurt and is just unloading the mother of all rants on me, the pent up energy is just spilling out of him.

“One girl finished with me because I was moaning your name in my sleep and it clearly wasn't a normal dream! It's no wonder they were always jealous of you, I have pictures of us in my apartment everywhere. I have your clothes in my apartment, your toothbrush, your deodorant, pyjamas, your favourite food, your favourite films even! I never called them Baby or Princess, they got no pet names. All of my phone is filled with pictures and videos of us together, my phone screen is of one of us together too. My wallpaper on my computer is even of us together. I finished with a girl once because she threw a picture of us together as kids against a wall in a fit of jealousy and it smashed and she ruined it too! I have only had angry one night stands for eighteen months because I couldn't go through these bullshit lies about liking these women anymore. I lied about having girlfriends to you too”

He lets out a huge huff of air where he is literally panting from spilling every last piece of frustration from the last sixteen years.

Jungkook stops his angry rant and looks down at me with a horrible hurt look in his eyes, my heart clenches at his pain because it’s my pain too.

His hand tenderly reaches for my face, placing his hand on my cheek, rubbing his thumb against it.

I tenderly place my hand over his and lean into his touch, closing my eyes.

"How dare he hurt my Alice, MY ALICE! I have wanted to beat his ass so many times over the years. Please never go back to him. I couldn't bear it, not again. I would leave for good, because I just can't handle watching it anymore Alice, it’s been destroying me. Please give me a chance, I would never treat you like that or cheat on you. I meant every word I said Baby, I love you so much. No one will ever love you as much as I love you, I love you so much that it hurts to be apart from you. I love you so much that I stayed because you are my home and my heart, my everything and I would be hollow without you"

Jungkook tells me with tenderness in his voice.

I open my eyes to finally look up at him, he leans in to give me a firm kiss on my forehead, then each cheek, then finally he leaves a lingering chaste kiss on my lips.

When he pulls away his face is still right by mine, my eyes scan his face and he is so beautiful, his dark doe eyes look more hopeful because I didn't stop him from kissing me.

I place my hand in his hair pulling his head back to mine pressing his lips against mine and as soon as his lips part I kiss him with a fervent passion my tongue caressing his, because I'm so hungry for this kiss, I'm finally able to kiss them like I have imagined so many times over the years.

He picks me up so fast making me straddle him, his lips still furiously kissing mine as he groans into my mouth.

Jungkook walks over to the sofa sitting down with me pulling me against his body, his hand moves to my waist and the other winds its fingers into my hair keeping me against his enthusiastic mouth making me whimper into the kiss.

When we pull away he keeps his lips ghosting over mine as we pant from the lack of breath.

"I love you so fucking much Jungkook! I always have and I always will, forevermore. I have never loved anyone else but you, it’s always been you. It could never be anyone but you”

I pant as my hot breath falls against his lips.

"My Princess, my Baby, I love you with every single part of my soul. My Alice. My beautiful girl, my best friend, you have never been anyone else’s but mine”

He replies, squeezing me tighter.

========================================

After our big argument we decided to take it slow but we are finally together, we laugh now about how stupid we both were as teenagers.

But we have been having really long deep conversations all the time to get through the hurt we have put each other through.

We both thought it was wise to heal first and not to jump headfirst into a sexual thing yet.

I have some really happy parents right now who told us it was about time we both realised that we loved each other, that it was so obvious to everyone but us.

They are all happy that Jimin is now a thing of the past, that I finally broke it off with him.

They were terrified that I would get pregnant and have him stuck in my life for good.

It's been six weeks since I split from Jimin and he still keeps trying to call me and message me on social media.

I blocked him a few times and he keeps getting new accounts, Jungkook finally texted him and told him to back the hell off.

He wasn't happy with Jungkook and told him to mind his own business.

Every time we see him we walk off in the opposite direction before he can see us.

We have been still taking it slow and I've been back at college for two weeks now, no one has noticed that we’re a couple where we were so close before anyway.

We are liking it that way for now, so there is no pressure from anyone.

People just thought he was being extra cautious and protective with me, so they didn't say anything when he held my hand or fed me food in the cafeteria.

Well they did think that, until Jimin just tried to approach me again today in the cafeteria and Jungkook told him to get away from me.

I can see everyone already whispering and I can see his baby momma watching us with a hurt look on her face, I notice her belly looking bigger than before and her friend is definitely looking pissed.

"What damn business is it of yours Jungkook? Let me speak to Alice and stop being the pathetic unrequited love disguised as a best friend”

Jimin sneers at him loudly before looking back at me, I hear an 'oh shit!' from Taehyung who knows Jungkook is probably going to punch him.

I'm about to stand up to tell him to get lost and to not speak to my boyfriend like that but Jungkook beats me to it.

"Best friend? You are a little behind on the news Jimin. Ha ha ha!! What you say to MY GIRLFRIEND, very much affects me”

He replies loudly standing up in his seat pushing his tray away, we hear gasps from people.

"ABOUT TIME! IT WAS OBVIOUS!”

Someone yells out, I dart my face to the sound source but I don't see who it is.

Pretty sure it was Taehyung though as he knew I loved Jungkook, I realised that he may have known that Jungkook loved me too.

Not that I can hold it against him as he kept my secrets, one of my darkest secrets. So it’s only fair he kept Jungkook’s secrets too.

"YOU AND HER! Oh you finally wormed your way in there and took advantage of my little mess. I always knew you wanted to take Alice from me. Do you think I didn't see all your love sick looks and those times you would walk off when I was kissing her. She is definitely on the rebound, how does it feel to be the rebound, poor Jungkookie! How did it feel to watch the girl you loved be kissed by me and to have to listen to her getting fucked by me"

He mocks him, sounding really angry and Jungkook jerks towards him where he is about to grab him but Jungkook pauses his head darting to me when I slam my drink down making a mess.

I’m just about ready to upload all of my frustration, anger and trauma on him, I’m ready.

"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP JIMIN! YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WAS THE STAND IN, THE FUCKING REPLACEMENT. WHERE I COULDN'T HAVE WHO I REALLY LOVED. YOU COULDN'T HOLD A CANDLE TO JUNGKOOK. HE AND I HAVE BASICALLY BEEN IN AN EMOTIONAL RELATIONSHIP FOR SIXTEEN YEARS AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE! BUT WE WERE TOO STUPID TO ADMIT WE HAVE LOVED EACH OTHER SINCE WE WERE CHILDREN. HE WAS WHO I THOUGHT ABOUT WHEN I DREAMED, WHO I THOUGHT ABOUT WHENEVER I DID HAVE SEX WITH YOU, WHICH WAS RARELY DUE TO YOU CHEATING SO MUCH! WHO I DREAMED ABOUT MARRYING. DON'T YOU REALISE THAT I HAVE NEVER SAID I LOVED YOU TO YOU, NOT ONCE! DID YOU NEVER NOTICE THAT I ONLY EVER REPLIED ME TOO. NOT THAT YOU HAVE EVER LOVED ME ANYWAY! BUT I ALWAYS TOLD JUNGKOOK THAT I LOVED HIM! AND EVEN IF HE DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS IN A ROMANTIC WAY, IT WAS! HE IS A THOUSAND TIMES THE MAN YOU ARE. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO KNOW I LOVED ANOTHER MAN THE WHOLE TIME I WAS WITH YOU?”

I’m shouting so loud that I’m surprised the college security hasn’t come yet.

I hear someone suddenly yell out.

"YES SAVAGE! Tell him Alice! He damn well deserves it. He is the ultimate piece of shit!”

I look and see that it's my old friend Yoongi who grins at me, he hates Jimin and punched him really hard once.

Jungkook is smiling at me, I can tell that he is really proud of me.

"HOW MUCH OF A BASTARD ARE YOU THAT YOUR BABY MOMMA FIANCÉE IS OVER THERE, AND YOU ARE TRYING TO GET ME BACK! WHY? JUST SO YOU CAN TELL ME HOW FUCKING FAT I AM OR HOW I AM SOOOO DAMN LUCKY TO BE WITH YOU?? WHY? SO YOU CAN TREAT ME LIKE SHIT AND CHEAT! OR WAS IT JUST SO YOU COULD RUB IT IN JUNGKOOK'S FACE? YOU KNEW HE LOVED ME AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY TO MAKE HIM FEEL LIKE ACTUALLY LEAVING! SO HE DIDN'T HAVE TO WATCH YOU TEARING ME DOWN AND MAKING ME LOSE WHO I WAS! YOU MADE ME LOSE ALL OF MY FRIENDS BECAUSE OF YOUR CHEATING! SLEPT WITH MY FRIENDS! AND STILL TRIED TO TAKE THE ONLY ONE I HAD LEFT BY TRYING TO PUSH HIM TO LEAVE TOO!"

I shout so loud that everyone is most definitely listening.

"Tell him Baby! Unload it all!"

Jungkook mischievously grins at me.

"I WILL SAY THIS ONLY ONCE. YOUR SEX WASN'T SHIT COMPARED TO JUNGKOOK'S AND YOU DON'T EVEN COMPARE IN SIZE! HA HA!YOU COULDN'T EVEN GET ME OFF SO I HAD TO THINK ABOUT JUNGKOOK EVERY TIME! I WAS ONLY WITH YOU TO TRY TO FORGET ABOUT JUNGKOOK! SO FUCK OFF AND DON'T TALK TO ME AGAIN! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR BULLSHIT AND I FEEL SORRY FOR CANDICE HAVING TO PUT UP WITH YOUR TOXIC CRAP FOREVER! I HATE YOU WITH A PASSION AND WOULDN'T CARE IF I EVER SAW YOU AGAIN! I WASTED THREE YEARS OF MY LIFE ON YOU AND I CAN NEVER GET THEM BACK! WHY WOULD I WANT TO SPEND ANOTHER THREE SECONDS MORE LISTENING TO YOUR RIDICULOUS RUBBISH! NOW LEAVE BEFORE I LET MY BOYFRIEND BEAT YOUR ASS LIKE HE HAS BEEN DYING TO DO FOR THREE YEARS!"

I sneer at him panting from my insane rant and I move to Jungkook who looks really proud of me for standing up for myself against Jimin finally and for what I just said.

He smirks and kisses me like he misses me and I don't care, I let him.

"WOO HOO!! THAT IS THE ALICE I MISSED!"

My friend Yoongi shouts out and Namjoon hollers out too whooping, I lost both of them due to Jimin.

My old friend Denise even whistles at us because she found out exactly what Jimin was like first hand too.

Taehyung even shouts out loudly.

"ABOUT DAMN TIME JUNGKOOK! I WAS LOSING HOPE THAT ALIKOOK WAS EVER GONNA BE A REALITY"

Jimin scoffs at us and finally marches away, my whole body goes pliant in Jungkook’s arms as I relax finally.

"I'm so fucking proud of you my Princess! My sex is much better huh, how do you know Baby? Or is that the sex you had in your dreams or imagination when you needed to get off? Hmm I like thinking that you were imagining me and I might have been imagining you at the same time. Now if he ever tries to get under my skin by saying something I can say that it was me who used to make you scream”

He groans in my ear, oh he likes that I thought about him every time or had to use him to get off.

We haven't had sex yet, just a little light foreplay until we both feel ready, as we are both still healing from years of suffering and trauma we put ourselves through.

"I know. But I couldn't have him mock you Kookie. I was about to punch him and I had to give him the cold hard truth. The way he talked to you was vile, I wasn’t having it, not anymore. That was the only part I lied about though, Kookie. As your dick is almost twice the size of his. THAT I didn't lie about!"

I giggle when he pecks all over my face.

"You two! Is this what I'm going to have to put up with every time I'm at Kook's now?!"

Taehyung shouts out groaning and I look to see everyone staring at our PDA, we cough and he pulls me to his lap and we sit down chuckling as we eat our dinner in peace.

Yoongi congratulates us as he walks to class with us and Namjoon said that he's proud of whoever went for it and confessed.

He was shocked when I put my hand up saying it was me, but he says he's damn proud patting my head.

Tells me that I’m glowing and look so much happier now, that he’s so happy for us.

Yoongi tells me that he is so glad that I’m finally free from that nightmare and Candice actually did me a favour.

Denise messaged me on Instagram telling me that she was sorry about what happened between us and that she is actually glad that I'm finally away from Jimin.

That he is one manipulative, toxic man.

That she was happy that I finally got with Jungkook after all those years of pining, she of course knew because I told her in high school.

She said it was so obvious over the years that we still loved each other.

I feel so damn amazing, I have had friends talk to me again for the first time in a year and I just told Jimin where to go.

AND I finally told him the cold hard truth!

Truths I couldn't admit to even myself before and now I'm brave enough to scream them at Jimin in the cafeteria in front of everyone.

I've finally broken the chain of toxicity and distrust, I'm utterly free.

And when I look up at Jungkook I couldn't be happier, I'm finally where I was supposed to be all along, with my heart, my soulmate, my person, my Jungkook, my love, my everything.

For More In This Series And Part Two called standing next to you: here

Master List: here

=======================================

©️ Bangtans Momma.

Please do not translate, copy, steal or repost my stories as your own, or any part of my story as your own either.

Do not feed any part of my stories into any AI software either.

Sharing the link or re-blogging is perfectly fine of course.

=======================================

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bts-fanfic-sideblog · 1 year

Text

ok so ot7 (namjoon centered) x fem!chubby!reader (because this is totally not self indulgent)

(lowercase on purpose)

reader is an artist and posts mural concepts based off kpop bands and someone in BTS’ staff finds out she made one for them and hires the reader to actually paint that mural in a practice room

so uhhh reader live streams their process and has the boys guest star on some of the streams for fun as like part of some promotion thing to keep the hype around both the artist and the mural high

reader has their own pretty big following that love reader before getting hired by the company, but the sudden attention from the BTS fan base kinda backfires because some of the fans get jealous that the reader gets to hang out with them for like hours on end at least twice a week

a majority of them like reader though because the fan base is honestly pretty chill

i want this to be sooo cute, like the boys celebrate reader’s birthday on stream. reader gets sick and the boys make little secret missions to go to her apartment and take care of them. dinners to celebrate milestones of the boys and they invite reader because she’s a friend now

maybe smut??? but not like “OH GOD THEYRE F U C K I N G” but more like “they’re experiencing each other for the first time because they’ve been dancing around dating for so long that the wait was worth it” kinda thing

if i ever do write smut, it’ll probably be in its own separate post opposed to have it within a chapter

⚠️spoilers for my own fic that i feel might be a big plot point and i probably should let it be a surprise but i want validation⚠️

so i want to have a scene where a sasaeng finds a way into the building to basically attack reader, but reader ends up outsmarting them or something and locks them IN the practice room from the outside

then the sasaeng starts having a tantrum essentially and throws paint all over the mural (like halfway done at this point) while reader is like “security hello??” and like freaks out in the hall because what the fuck that’s terrifying

uhhh sasaeng gets arrested and taken away and the room is an absolute mess, the boys are all there trying to comfort reader while they basically just kinda blankly stare at the mess on the mural

but surprise surprise it just wiped off easily because reader is smart and puts varnish or something on after every stream (don’t ask why i don’t know i just wanted reader to be cool)

so reader gathers their jacket or rag around their arm and takes huge angry swipes at the “ruined” mural to reveal the untouched painting underneath. people take videos, making it into the news outlets and magazines and websites saying like “look at this badass, don’t fuck with her”

(edits get made out of that footage because i said so, and honestly good for reader)

#bts x chubby reader #bts x reader #chubby!reader #jhope x reader #jimin x reader #jin x reader #jungkook x reader #taehyung x reader #yoongi x reader #namjoon x reader #bts ot7 x reader #bts x you #bts x y/n #bts x plus size reader #bts x artist!reader #bts x female reader #bts x fem!reader

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tinywooniverse · 1 year

Text

princess!reader x servant!jimin hc/fic

requested?: yes!

x chubby reader

genre: idk fr

warnings: bodyshaming

not edited

gifs are not mine!

you were born into a life of royalty.

everything you wanted came easily. you were your land’s pride and joy as well as your father’s.

but you were lonely

your father saw this and knew he needed to fix this quickly

he appointed jimin, a young boy who lived a semi-normal life in your kingdom, to be your servant. he requested that jimin be at your every beck and call.

and he was

you were each other’s entire world from the moment you met. you couldn’t remember life without him and vice versa.

you two grew up together and changed from kids to teen to adults.

at some point during those years, the two of you had fallen for each other. openly yearning for one another.

he had even given you your first kiss on your 18th birthday, in secret of course.

after that, your relationship had been comprised of secret affection, stolen kisses and longing glances

there was never any talk of furthering the relationship or putting a title on things because you both knew that it would complicate everything and you were afraid that your father might separate you from jimin

this went on for years until word had spread around the castle when some people had seen you and jimin interacting outside of your quarters and it quickly made its way to your father

your father was a stern and stubborn king but you were his one and only child,his princess, so he bent to your will. allowing jimin to still be by your side.

under one condition

you were to meet a suitor to be wed to. a prince from another country who was far from being in line for the throne.

he claimed it was your duty as a princess, and only daughter to find the next king for your people.

you begrudgingly obliged, knowing this was his punishment.

“why must you go?” jimin groans as you get ready for your departure.

“it is my duty as the princess of this land,” you sigh, “besides what if this prince is a handsome, noble and charming man and i happen to fall in love.”

you were met with silence. you were only joking to lighten the mood but jokes have never been your forte. you turn around to see jimin’s dark gaze trained on you. he looked broken by your words. you grab his hands and lock eyes.

“i was joking, you know,” you say, softly and it looks as if a weight was lifted off of his shoulders, “i vow to never fall in love with anyone but you, till the end of time.”

“and if you do?” he asks.

“then may the gods send me the wrath of hell.” you smile, leaning so close that you forehead are touching. you soak in the presence of each other until you were called to leave.

upon meeting the prince you were meant to wed, you were withdrawn.

he was a very handsome man, and well mannered too

however, when you were left alone to get acquainted, you were left with a bad taste in your mouth.

he was ill tempered and quite rude, especially about your body.

he believed the body of a princess should be small and fragile looking and because you did not look the part you were a lazy princess who would have to be arranged to be wed in order to have any semblance of romance in your life.

“that’s not a very nice thing to say to the woman who can make you a king,” you spat, “and there are many a man that would kiss the ground i walk on with no other reason than to be in my presence. surely not to become king,”

“because the men of your kingdom have no standards with a princess who looks as unsightly as you,” he scoffs, “when i am king, they will come to their senses.”

“you musn’t forget,” you press, stepping forward, “you may become king, but it is my land and they are my people. i have been preparing to rule my entire life and i can do so with or without you.”

your father had made a grave mistake in having you meet, and even started regretting forcing the life of marriages of convenience on you shortly after.

he saw the effect it made on you before anyone else could.

you had become mean spirited and closed off from everyone, choosing to spend time alone in your quarters day in and day out, only being seen for meals.

you had even turned jimin away time after time, causing him to worry as well.

a week had passed before your father had called upon jimin.

“you called, your highness?” he asks, bowing.

“i did,” the king sighs, “i worried for my daughter. she has not been the same since she met the prince.”

jimin hums, hoping to hear that you were okay.

“do you love my daughter, young man?” your father asks.

“i do,” jimin answered without hesitation, “she is the light of my life. i cannot remember what my life was like before her and i cannot imagine what my life would be like without her. i am well aware the with my upbringing that i can never truly be with the princess but the time we have spent together was not in vain. i have gotten to love the most beautiful woman in the world, even if just for a few years. that means the world to me.”

the king just stares with a hardened expression and jimin begins to feel the weight of his words crush him. he knows that speaking as freely as he did could get him punished but he figured since the king asked that he should answer honestly.

“i haven’t heard such a sentiment since i fell in love with y/n’s mother,” the king says and jimin’s eyes widen, “you’d make a fine king one day.”

“but sir-” jimin starts but is sent away to get you.

jimin is stunned but feel like he is floating from you father’s approval of him when he reaches your door.

he says almost nothing while accompanying you to see your father and you just stare at him suspiciously.

“hello father.” you bow and look and his soft eyes on you.

“hi princess,” he says softly, smiling. you sit at his feet patiently waiting for him to speak, “what did you think of the prince?”

“he’s not quite ready to be a king,” you sigh, “and he’s not a fit man for a lady such as i. i do not wish to marry him.”

“are you saying this genuinely or are you saying this to be with jimin?”

“jimin has nothing to do with this. you have raised me to know this land and the responsibilities i owe to the people. i am willing to be queen and take on those responsibilities without being wed.” you explain.

“do you love jimin?” he asks.

“like the moon loves the sun.” you answer.

“how so?”

“in the early morning. when the world stands still while the darkness turns to light, the moon will cling to both light and dark to see the sun in the sky, if even for a short moment. that’s why you can seen both in the sky if you were lucky enough. he is my sun. i cling to a distant reality in order to be in love with him, even if it won’t be for long.”

“i was a fool to appoint jimin, assuming you wouldn’t fall in love with him,” he says and you frown, “but just as i have watched you grow, i have also watched him. and in doing so i have seen more than enough to allow you to choose your own path. i will not stand in your way. if you believe jimin will be a king fit enough for you one day then you may be with him.”

without a word you share a hug with your father, squeezing him tightly. you pull away and smile at him, seeing a twinkle in his eyes.

you and jimin fall for each other openly afterwards.

one night, while laying in bed jimin brought up the suitor.”

“did you fall for him?” he asks and you look at him, amused.

“why? are you feeling envious?” you giggle.

“of course not.” he sighs, looking to the ceiling.

“it doesn’t matter, my love. my meeting with him was many moons ago,” you say, “and you will be king someday while he is still the forgotten prince of his kingdom.”

he hums and you kiss him.

“besides, i’ve vowed my love and life to you.” you say.

“and mine to you.” he smiles.

#bts #bts x chubby reader #bts x reader #bts x you #bts x y/n #bts x plus size reader #bts x curvy reader #jimin #jimin x you #jimin x reader #jimin x chubby reader #jimin x plus size reader

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candywife333 · 5 months

Text

ANNOUNCEMENT

I am currently planning a 25 days to Christmas chubby reader x bts fic release. The idea is to release a one-shot per day with different themes all the way till Christmas. Hopefully I can pull through.

Wish you all a very happy holidays and I hope I can make it even better!!

I’ve officially started releasing the oneshots. Hope you guys like them ❤️❤️❤️❤️

#Christmas #christmas fic #25 days to christmas #BTS #Chubby reader #plus size reader #curvy reader #jungkook x chubby reader #jimin x chubby reader #namjoon x chubby reader #jin x chubby reader #suga x chubby reader #jhope x chubby reader #smut #angst #fluff #comedy #taehyung x chubby reader

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namjoonswaifu · 11 months

Text

Chapter 7- The Move

Authors note- I am so sorry it has been taking me so long to write, every time I sat down to write, I just had writer's block and nothing was working. However, I am on holiday in France right now, and the sun is shining, the birds are chirping and I finally found inspiration. This isn't a long chapter but I hope you all enjoy it.

total word count: 2.4k

warnings:

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, bullying, loneliness, anxiety, money problems, mentions of how other people view characters body

message me if you feel I need more warnings or if you would like to be a proofreader!

As soon as the words came out of your mother's mouth, the smile on Namjoons face changed from one of nervousness to one of genuine happiness. Taking a step back from your family, Namjoon moves to talk to the audience.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I apologise for what just happened. Let us move on to the next event! I sincerely hope that you enjoy the music and food! Please, enjoy yourselves!” he speaks, his hands moving to clasp together as he finishes his sentence. The crowd stays where they are, still reeling from the events that have already happened this evening.

You turn your head to make brief eye contact with Namjoon, to find that he was already looking at you. He takes a step towards you and offers his arm to you. Smiling brightly at the man, you try to place your arm in his as elegantly as possible, knowing that the court is watching you. Once your arms are connected, Namjoon smiles down at you. His smile passed on words that his mouth couldn’t say at present.

You look behind you to see where your mother was, to find Yoongi offering her arm to your mother. Your siblings had been a part of the crowd and they would not be joining you for the dinner, which weirdly made you feel a little less nervous, as they wouldn’t be able to tell embarrassing stories of you growing up to the man you were about to marry.

The walk to the separate room where the dinner would be held took about a minute. The large group of you meander down halls and through some doors before arriving at the final place. Inside the room was a table in a circular shape. There was one large throne-like chair similar to the one that was in the hall at the top of the table from where you were standing. To the left of that chair was another chair that almost looked like one of the throne room chairs. And to the right of that large throne-like chair were two more slightly decorated chairs. The other six chairs were decorated with the titles of the men who would be sitting there spread evenly around the circle. Namjoon led you to the chair to the right of the large chair. He pulled the chair out, making you blush, as it was very uncommon for a king to do this for anyone. Once you were sat, he did the same for your mother and then his own before sitting down. Looking around you, you noticed that everyone was smiling. You took this moment to look at what everyone was wearing, only having the chance to see what the King, the Queen Dowager, Yoongi and your mother had been wearing. The boys were all wearing various shades of red and white. The colour complements their skin brilliantly underneath the lamplight. It made their eyes shine even brighter than they already were. Taking in a deep breath you allow yourself to feel happy and content at this moment. You felt free and able to finally breathe.

Moments, after you were all sat down, the doors opened and two lines of servants filed into the room, some holding food, some holding drinks, some had cups and some had cutlery. Before your very eyes, the things in their hands were set out in their perfect positions, cups were filled as well as plates and hearts were opened, as the conversation began.

Namjoon manages to sneakily move his chair as close to you as he can without making the other boys jealous, which he knows will lead to the young ones play fighting, and who knows how that’ll end. Catching your eyes, he leans closer to you, and you lean closer to him. He speaks in a quiet tone, the smile showing in his eyes and on his lips. “Thank you for accepting my proposal, I promise I will make you the happiest woman alive, as you have made me and my boys- I mean men, the last few weeks” he speaks.

“My king, do not fear, I know of the relationship between you and the boys- I mean men” you copy, making him laugh before you continue “I have come to love each and every one of you and I would be honoured to join your family”. The smile on Namjoon’s face when you tell him this, makes his smile larger, and a blush fall from his ears to his cheeks. Namjoon takes your hand before speaking again “Well if that’s the case then I can’t wait to marry you, and 50 days can’t come soon enough, Nae salang/Sarang”. Seconds later, he lets go of your hand before standing up to address the people in the room.

Firstly, he turns to the servants “Thank you for your work, you may go and enjoy the party, this can all be cleared up tomorrow, tonight we celebrate.” Then he turns to the people at the table, clasping his cup, he brings it to the air “And to my family, let us celebrate a union of two families, let us celebrate love in all its forms and let us celebrate our blessings. To celebrating!” he says, lifting his glass every so slightly higher at the end of his statement.

“To celebrating!” everyone yells in unison, with their classes similarly raised in the air to the kings. Once everyone has yelled out, Namjoon sits down, and the conversations re-begin. Memories are shared between people, laughter is heard and love is shared. In that room, love and happiness were evident for even a blind man to see and feel.

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The next day you woke up to a knock at your door. It was Hwasa waking you up.

“Good morning your majesty,” she tells you “You have a busy day today, we must get you bathed and dressed”.

“Please do not call me ‘Your Majesty’” you giggle to Hwasa, “you’ll give me an ego,” you tell her with a wink. She laughs alongside you, before taking your hand and bringing you back into the bathing room. “Today's bath will be shorter as you have a very busy day, I will come back and collect you when it is time, do you need anything else ma’am?” she asks. You smile and shake your head, excited to enjoy your bath no matter how long you would be in it.

Stepping into the bath, you allow yourself to feel the warmth surrounding your body, the muscles that were tense from anxiety the past few days slowly releasing and making your body feel at ease. You dip your head into the bath, allowing your hair to enjoy the water as well. The bath is exactly what you needed this morning, and you were relieved that it was able to be added to your busy schedule.

Around 15 minutes later, Hwasa walks back into the room, holding a long cloth that would dry you and a silken red robe with dragons embroidered into it. “The king and his men had this made for you. They had them make it as soon as you agreed to be the royal bride” she tells you. This information brings a smile to your face, and once your cloth is tied around you, you reach out for the robe, wanting to feel it in your hands. You place the robe delicately around your shoulders as you follow Hwasa out of the room, and into where you dressed each day. On your way, however, you noticed that all of your stuff had been placed into boxes.

“Why is my stuff in boxes? I thought I was to stay…” your voice trembles, anxiety hitting you like a brick wall.

“Do not worry” Hwasa reassures, “you are staying, you are just being moved to a different courtyard closer to the king and his men, it is tradition. You will be transferred from the emerald apartment to the cherry blossom courtyard, which is on the other side of the cherry blossom garden. Oh, a letter has arrived for you today by the way!”

“A letter? Who from?” you ask as Hwasa hands you the letter. You pull the wax away from the envelope and open it up.

Her future royal highness, y/n,

This letter was written to you regarding the royal engagement. It is a formal proposal letter. Please enjoy you’re new homing in the Cherry Blossom Garden. If you need anything, please do not hesitate to contact any of us.

Sincerely,

King Kim Namjoon

And the boys

You giggled at the little addition at the bottom of the letter added by your boys, it made you even more sure that you were making the right decision. Folding the letter back up, you place it, along with the envelope on the dressing table near you.

“Well then, I guess we had better get ready so we can see this new venue.” you grinned at her.

Hwasa brings you over to the dressing table which still remained, sitting beautifully in front of two doors that would slide open. Realising this was your last day here, you decided to be bold and ask the woman, who had quickly become your friend, to open those doors whilst you had your hair and makeup done. She agreed but notified you that you must get dressed first, turning her hand towards the cotton figurine that stood in the doorway near your bedroom. Looking over at the hanbok you noticed the colour, it was a deep red colour, similar to the one you wore to the dinner the other day. And similar to the other, you noticed a gold band along the bottom of the skirt. Looking closer at it you noticed that it had been embroidered with both the seal of the dragon, one of royalty, and the seal of your house, tigers. Your heart lept with warmth and love at the thoughtfulness of your boys. A part of you felt weird calling them your boys when you haven’t had more than a crush before in your life. But in the same way, you have never felt more loved in your life. With a smile, you turned to Hwasa and stood to allow her to help you get ready.

Once you were dressed, minus your gomusin and beoseon, you sat down and looked at yourself in the mirror as Hwasa opened the doors allowing the light to flood into the room. Feeling the warmth on your face, you felt at peace for the first time in a very long time. Hwasa and Hyo-Seong quickly moved on to applying your makeup and hair. The makeup was applied with a sense of regality that hadn't quite been there in the past times your makeup was done. Next was your hair, pulled in different directions and braided before being placed into an updo. Two matching hair pins are slid into the final hair-do, making it perfect. It still felt unreal to look at yourself in the mirror as your hair was done by two of the king’s servants. A sudden anxiety hit you as you realised you were to become the royal bride in less than 2 months. Noticing the anxious look on your face, Hwasa places a gentle hand on your shoulder, offering you a kind but small smile.

“Your mother should be here soon, she was staying in the azurite apartment, but she will also be moving to the cherry blossom courtyard to stay with you until the wedding.”

As soon as the words fell from her lips, the anxiety that was building in your heart melted away till there was barely any left. Hwasa smiled at your now relaxed face, before picking up your makeup and opening the bits she needed.

“Now… let's do your makeup so we can go and see your new residence” Hyo-Seong smiled at the two of you.

After a few minutes, your makeup was done and you stood from your seat, you took one last look at the view from where you had been sat before turning towards the door and putting on your beoseon and gomusin. Hwasa and Hyo-Seong each took a door and opened it, allowing you to exit from the apartment you had spent the last two weeks in for the final time. To your surprise, Yoongi and Namjoon were waiting outside, surrounded by some of their guards, whose faces you had come to recognise but had yet been unable to put a name to. Noticing that the doors had opened up, Namjoon and Yoongi looked up, seeing you. The smiles on their faces brought a smile to your own.

Namjoon steps towards you, followed closely by the older but shorter man. The younger man reaches you within a few steps and greets you with a bow. The cat-like man followed his suit. Standing to full height once again, Namjoon grins at you.

“Good morning my queen, I take it you know where you are to move to today?” he asked, the grin just as wide at the end of his question as it was at the beginning. Pretending that you didn’t know, you let the grin that was on your face fall.

“Are you sending me home your Highness?” You asked with mock sadness on your face. Namjoon’s smile fell instantly, as did the man smile behind him.

“NO!” He yelled, moving towards you, before pausing. “I'm sorry, I mean… I mean no you are not being sent home” he spoke in a calmer tone. You took a step closer to the man before speaking again.

“Hmm,” you sighed, taking another step forward. “Well then…” you carried on, slipping your smaller hand into his much larger one. “I guess you’ll just have to guide me to wherever I am to be moved to today” you finished with a smile. Relief instantly flooded the men before you’s faces. Namjoons smile returned to his face, as he turned to Yoongi, “It looks like we have another prankster on our hands, don’t tell the maknaes, we need this one on our side.” Yoongi replied with a small nod of his head and a gorgeous smirk, agreeing with what the man before him had said, secretly planning pranks the two of you could do in his head. Namjoon grips your hand in his and turns towards the pathway that would take you to the cherry blossom courtyard.

“Let us go, my queen” he spoke quietly into your ear.

Series taglist:

@skyys-universe @angel-121 @queen-in-the-shadows @iwishididntexist @hair1997 @unqiuecutieprincess @agusfree @treetops68 @sbromp @explorewithd @zmbo97 @maetyun @sgnsgssy @feedthefandoms995 @hajimaoppaa @emu007 @silverrr-spooon @el-insomnio-no-es-divertido @scentisterror @hey-syia @insert-a-creative-url-right-here @uniquelyabnormallyoriginal @poesreddeath @thedarkwinterrose @yoongiigolden @zae007live @namjinieesope @iamhereforbts

permanent tag list: @ewok7attack @marc-ella

#the seal of the dragon #tsotd #bts x chubby reader #bts #jeon jeongkook #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #kim taehyung #jung hoseok imagine #kim seokjin imagine #kim namjoon imagine #kim taehyung imagine #jeon jungkook imagine #park jimin #park jimin imagine #min yoogni #min yoongi imagine

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hobicakess · 2 years

Text

Wives profiles

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ _________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

disclaimer: i do not ship these people in real life, this is just a fragment of imagination. understand that the way I portray these people in my story is not how they actually are!

MEGAN THEE STALLION as TINA KIM

⸻ WIFE OF KIM NAMJOON

AGE: 26 • OCCUPATION : register nurse • RANK : top bitch with or without her husbands status. • THREAT LEVEL: 10/10 (her hubby is literally the boss) • TROPE: enemies to lovers

KEKE PALMER as JASMINE KIM

WIFE OF KIM SEOKJIN

AGE: 30 • OCCUPATION : retired fish biologist • RANK: 2nd ranked wife due to the fact she's the oldest • THREAT LEVEL : 4 (hates the drama but she will sit back and sip her tea while the other girls dog it out) • TROPE: strangers to lovers

SZA as DIAMOND MIN

WIFE OF MIN YOONGI

AGE: 28 OCCUPATION: pole dancer,retired scammer, on-going thief • RANK: 4th (it's be lower if she didn't stab yoongi and taze jungkook before) • THREAT LEVEL : 10/10 (her mouth lethal, she loves knife and tazers.) • TROPE: enemies to lovers

DOJA CAT as QUINN JUNG

WIFE OF JUNG HOSEOK

AGE: 27 • OCCUPATION: choreographer • RANK: 6 • THREAT LEVEL : 5/10 (there's really no explanation she's just not the type of person you wanna provoke) • TROPE: friends to lovers

CHLOE BAILEY as ATHENA PARK

WIFE OF PARK JIMIN

AGE: 26 • RANK: 4th • THREAT LEVEL: 9/10 (tried to kill jimin on multiple occasions and punched namjoon once.) • TROPE: stranger/enemies to lovers

NORMANI KORDEI as TIANA KIM

WIFE OF KIM TAEHYUNG

AGE: 25 • OCCUPATION: singer at winter bear nightclub • RANK: 3rd • THREAT LEVEL: 8/10 • TROPE: strangers to lovers

HALLE BAILEY as ARIEL JEON

WIFE OF JEON JUNGKOOK

AGE: 19 • OCCUPATION: none • RANK: 7th • THREAT LEVEL: 1/10 • TROPE: arranged marriage

#bts x black reader #bts x black girl #namjoon x y/n #namjoon fanfiction #taehyung fanfiction #park jimin x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #jung hoseok x reader #kim seokjin x reader #kim namjoon x reader #min yoongi x reader #mafia!bts #poly!bts x reader #bts x chubby reader #kim taehyung x reader #bts fanfic

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writtenbynamu · 9 months

Text

𝐑𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

✫7:20 am, Wednesday, December 6, 2019

Your morning started the way it always did around this time of year; with you all alone in a bed big enough to fit at least three people (7 if you tried hard enough). The sheets had become a tangled mess around you, most likely from all the tossing and turning you did when the boys had left.

It was something they had come to notice over the years. No matter how deep in sleep you were, you became restless as soon as the warmth of the body(ies) that were pressed up against you had disappeared, so did your peace. It was as if your subconscious could sense that they were no longer with you, and it always ended up with you rolling around aimlessly in bed searching for wouldn't return until you finally got tired of it and woke up.

You groaned as you forced your eyes open, exhaustion hitting you as soon as you did so. It was mama day, meaning it was a performance day, meaning that Jungkook couldn’t sleep which by extension meant that you couldn’t sleep either. You had stayed up listening to him ramble on about how nervous he was and how upset he would be with himself if he made a single mistake. You lay there softly whispering reassurances to him as you run your hands through his hair.

It was long now, as per your (totally not) drunk horny monologue six months ago about how frustrated you were that he had cut his hair You went on and on about how exhilarating it had been to rake your fingers along his scalp and just pull on his hair as he kissed you on both sets of your lips. Jungkook, the masochist he is, always found his eyes rolling to the back of his head, the pain from your acrylics digging into his skin and the mere force of your grip on his roots turning him on a little too much. And yet, he still had the audacity to chop it all off. You had almost driven yourself to the brink of tears, wailing about how gutted you had been when he walked in with an undercut instead of the loose perm he had left home to get.

“He’s so mean to me minnie, he lied” you sobbed as you threw yourself dramatically against Jiminin’s chest

“He said he was g-gonna get curls and came back with 4 bone straight inches of hair,” you wailed, throwing your head to the side. Then, as if having the biggest revelation of the century, you peeled your body off Jimin’s, landing squarely on the floor in your drunken stupor.

What little logic you had left told you that trying to stand up again would be a bad idea, so you switched over to your hands and knees instead. You locked your eyes on Yoongi and began to crawl until you were nestled between his open legs on the floor. You looked up at him, eyes glistening with unshed tears and lust and a collective gasp echoed in the room.

You found your grip on his knee and hauled yourself into his lap, one leg on either side of his lean body, straddling him.

“You’re sooo pret-pretty Oppa,” you said, hands coming up to stroke his cheeks. “You have the longest hair right now,” you whined, running your hand through the silky black strands. “You’re not gonna cut it are you daddy?’ you pouted.

A sharp thrust knocked the breath out of you, the roughness of his jeans hitting your clit through your flimsy shorts and your eyes widened in shock when you took in Yoongi’s hooded eyes and clenched jaw. Your brain hadn't registered it yet, how wet you were, how wet you were making Yoongi’s lap.

You were an emotional drunk, and it just so happened that one of those emotions was horniness. You tended to get particularly touchy whenever you had liquor in your system, your entire body running wildly hot. This usually took the form of you rubbing your ass against the nearest crotch you could reach, blindly seeking to soothe the dull ache between your thighs. It was always torture for your boyfriends because they couldn’t and wouldn't touch you when you got like this, no matter how prettily you begged for it. That night was no different.

Unbeknownst to you and your alcohol-impaired brain, you had been grinding on Yoongi the entire time. The Sheer tank top you wore with your tiny pyjama bottoms did nothing to hide the outline of your hardened nipples as you practically shoved your boobs in his face.

“Oppa…”

Yoongi ran a hand down his face in frustration and groaned. “Someone please get her off me and into bed” he begged. The snickers that rang out in the room made his face run hot with embarrassment and he threw a pillow at Jin who was doing a painfully poor job at muffling his laughter in Taehyung’s arm.

It was Namjoon who had finally come over and lifted you gently out of Yoongi’s lap, however, not quickly enough to stop you from licking a wet stripe across Yoongi’s lips.

“Hm, so pretty Oppa,” you said with a lopsided grin as Yoongi sat with his jaw slack.

If you hadn't been so out of it, you would've noticed Jimin promptly taking your place on Yoongi’s lap, and seen Hoseok drag Taehyung to his room… but the last thing you remember is the gentle press of lips to your forehead as Namjoon tucked you in for the night.

They had teased both you and Yoongi for weeks after, but they all avoided their hairstylist for a few months.

A small price to pay for a service so great.

You could tell just from the feel of it that his hair was due for a trim and deep treatment, but with all the styling and heat it would have to endure over the next 12 hours, you made a mental note to do it sometime next week.

You sat up in bed, back cracking as you did so, and reached over to grab your phone from the nightstand. You had 4 reminders and 3 messages

Minnie

Hi angel, we had to leave early for the final dress rehearsal :(

But! Hyung ordered you something really nice for breakfast

It should be coming around 10, EAT IT ALL OR I’LL BE MAD

Hoseokie Hyung is getting testy so I’m gonna put the phone

Down before he kills me. Can't wait to see you tonight!

I love you!

K🍪🍪k

Hi noona, sorry for keeping you awake last night:((((

I’ll let you paint my nails to make up for it okay?

Have a good day!

I can't wait to see you tonight<3

Grumpy Cat Man

Your nail appointment is at 12. We’ll send a driver at 11:30.

The dress gets dropped off at 3.

Makeup is at 7.

Don't forget your fan.

See you.

You couldn’t help but giggle at the juxtaposition between the three messages. You don't know why, but Yoongi’s formality over text was always funny to you. He always spoke in full sentences and with proper grammar as if he was speaking to a business associate and not someone whose mouth he spits in on a regular basis. Cute.

You spent the next two minutes or so replying to them, a flurry of “oh no don’t apologise”, “thank you’s” and ``I love you's''.

You finally detangled yourself from the sheets, stood up and stretched. Your bounds cracked loudly and a shiver ran through your body from how good it felt. You pulled your bonnet further down on your forehead, feeling that it had slipped almost to the middle of your head at some point during the night. But the thought of your freshly done hair already frizzing up didn't worry you for two reasons. 1. You slept on silk sheets and 2. You were wearing a scarf underneath. Your temple had screamed in protest as you secured the cloth tightly unto your head, but your hair had taken too much money and way too much time to let it go to waste. So you tied the scarf as tightly as you could and waited the requisite 30 minutes for the nagging pull on your forehead to fade.

✫10:08 am

By the time the food Jin ordered had arrived, you had already showered, brushed your teeth and slipped into your favourite (Namjoon’s) oversized shirt and some old shorts. Jin had ordered you a huge western spread from your favourite cafe. Pancakes, hashbrowns bacon and scrambled eggs complete with nutmeg-flavoured hot chocolate. You wondered how he was able to make the order that early in the morning. Surely they hadn't been open, but it was Jin and Jin had a way of always getting what he wanted when he wanted it, so you found it pointless to question. You took a bite of the hashbrown and nearly moaned. There was nothing you loved more in this world than a good potato, better yet golden brown, fried one. The eggs were fluffy and light, the bacon the right amount of crispy. Every bite you took made your insides warmer and your heart smiled from how content you were.

Halfway through your breakfast, you resolved to take a quick selfie as you stuffed your mouth with the pancakes, eyebrows drawn in a way that made you look as if you were angry with the food. You sent it to the group chat. Solid proof you had eaten so the boys wouldn’t worry and a way to scandalise Jungkook, you loved today.

✫1:34 pm

You sat in the nail salon, the overpowering smell of acrylic and plastic being worn away infiltrating your nose even through the mask you had on. You had been in the chair for almost an hour and a half now, having got there five minutes before your appointment. As yoongi promised, your driver had rung you from the lobby at 11:30 sharp. He sat across from you in the waiting area, eyes visibly watering and rubbing at his eyes.

You were the only client in the salon, all the other stations were dark except the one you were sitting at. This was the norm whenever you had an appointment of any kind. The boys always insisted that you were given the best and most discreet service possible. The only thing that kept you from feeling bad about the revenue the other workers would have lost at your expense was the big cheque you know was handed to each person in exchange for taking the day off, and the even bigger cheque your technician got to not ask questions.

Speaking of employees,

“Minyoung,” you called, turning to him as best as you could without moving your hands ``You know you don’t have to stay inside right? You can go sit in the car or even go get something to eat until I'm done”

He cleared his throat and sat up straighter “I couldn’t Yn-ssi, someone has to stay here with you”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes “Youngie, we’ve talked about this. I’m not a baby, I can take care of myself. I won't be done for another hour or so, do you really want to sit there for that long?”

He averted his gaze from you, because of course he didn’t and if there was one thing you learnt from being around Minyoung for the better of five years was that he couldn't lie to save his life.

“But Mr. Min-”

You raised a questioning brow at him. He sighed deeply, knowing he wouldn't win this argument with you.

“Okay, but I’ll be right in the car okay? Keep your phone-”

“Minyoung.”

“Yes Yn-ssi?”

“Out.”

✫3:30 pm

Your breath hitched as you ran your fingers across the jewelled corset of the black dress. The box had been unexpectedly heavy when you lifted it from outside your door, but you hadn’t thought much of it, thinking that it was just the weight of the fabric itself. Maybe it was just a long dress… but it wasn't that.

The bodice was covered in rhinestones, these were fucking Swarovski crystals. You knew Jimin tended to go overboard when it came to you, especially when you gave him the freedom to choose your clothes. You can't begin to fathom how expensive it must have been to make this dress happen and the mere thought of it had you c. You were going to be up on Jimin tonight that someone would have to physically drag you off him.

✫8:30 pm

The day was a blur after your dress had arrived. The makeup team, yes a team had come a little after seven. They were all either black or mixed, a great comfort for you since your first MAMA had been so disastrous.

The stylists had come well prepared, with a wide array of the best foundations, lipsticks and blushes. You name it, they had it. Just not in your shade. You should have noticed from the way their eyes had widened and their shoulders sagged when you had opened the door. They had apologised, you just hadn't been what they were expecting and you understood that, but it still hurt. They had come prepared, but not prepared for you.

You had done your makeup yourself instead, it wasn't the full glam you had wanted to give, but you still looked good.

The boys had taken it worse than you did; nothing hurt them more than you feeling othered or less than. They made sure to pick your stylists personally after that THey would compile a list and let you choose the ones with the work you liked best. It was a very thorough process that took them quite a while to do. Given how packed their schedules already were, their efforts truly meant the world to you.

Your makeup this year had come out exactly how you wanted, the black and gold smokey eye matched your dress perfectly, complimenting your coffin-shaped ombre nails of the same colours(Jimin picked that too). You looked amazing. Your butterfly locs cascaded down to the top of your ass, the dress hugged your body in all the right places. The bodice allowed for an adequate amount of cleavage and the split showed just enough leg to be tasteful. The sequins on your black pumps shone as you walked. You felt gorgeous and hoped that your boys would think so too.

Minyoung had accompanied you to the idol seating section, way at the back where you could blend in with the shadows so that you wouldn't accidentally get caught in any cameras, but close enough that you could get a good view of the stage. He left once you assured him (six times) that you were okay and nothing was amiss; but not before telling you to make sure your phone was on and to text him if you needed him.

You hadn’t heard from your boyfriends since earlier, award show days always caused the longest pauses in communication for all of you.

You had no idea what they were wearing or what they were performing and the anticipation had you vibrating in your seat.

You had been sitting quietly on your phone for about fifteen minutes before the heat began to hit you. You never quite understood how idols were always sweating at award shows until you had gone to one yourself. You supposed that after handing out cheques to the biggest name in the industry, the budget did not allow for little privileges like air conditioning. You started digging through your purse when you realised. you left your fan. shit

For a second, you contemplated bearing it. Thugging it out so you wouldn’t miss seeing when your boys came on stage for the first time. But who were you kidding? You knew they were gonna perform last anyways. So you, the ever-practical woman that you were, decided to go backstage and seek out a handheld fan. You knew there were many of them on site because they were used to cool the idols down between sets, but you just didn't know where exactly the boys’ dressing room was.

You made your way carefully down the steps, using the screen of your phone as a flashlight to draw as little attention to yourself as possible. There was hustle and bustle backstage that settled momentarily into an awkward silence when you stepped from behind the curtain. Everyone stopped what they were doing for a second just to gawk at you. You had gotten used to the staring and the questioning looks many a moon ago plus, you looked great. They could stare all they wanted. After the initial shock of your entrance had worn off, the busyness returned. Everyone was either running or speed walking toward the dressing room. Dragging clothing racks behind them or slinging garment bags over their arm.

You paused to check the time on your phone at 9:00 pm.

Someone had bumped into you, knocking you off balance for a second. Then you, in turn, bumped into someone else, an idol at that.

“Oh! I'm so sorry I-”

“Y/N-ah?”

“Jeongyeon Unnie!” You replied, eyes lighting up with recognition. You pulled her into a quick hug.

“How have you been?” you asked

“I’ve been doing good,” she gave you a once over “you however seem to be doing way better than I am, just look at you. You look amazing Y/N-ah”

If you could blush, you were pretty sure that your cheeks would have had a hint of pink on them by now. You had never been good with compliments.

“Thank you unnie, you look really nice too.” and she did. She was already dressed in her performance outfit, her hair curled and only her makeup left to be done. But she looked all the better that way.

“What are you doing backstage?”

“I came to get one of those portable fan things, it's way too hot inside and I left mine at home” you explained. Jeongyeon nodded in understanding.

“We have extra in our dressing room, let me go get you one real quick,” she said as she turned on her heels to leave. That's when you noticed it. Her hair was caught in the zipper of her top. Most likely extensions since she wasn't feeling the tug. You reached out for her hand and pulled her back to you. She looked at you in confusion.

“Just stand up for a sec,” you said, reaching your hand behind her back and pulling her zipper down.

She stood frozen on the spot, her confusion growing by the second.

“There!” you said, tossing her hair to the side and pulling her zipper back up “Your extensions were caught”

“Ohhh,” she said with a relieved chuckle. “Alrighty then, let me go get a fan for you” and she scurried away in what you assumed was the direction of Twice’s dressing room.

You heard a throat clear behind you and turned to see Jimin. A very angry-looking Jimin. You opened your mouth to greet him and ask him what was wrong before he held up a silencing finger and jerked his head towards a darker, more private area.

“Min-”

What was that just now?” he demanded, looking down at you with narrowed eyes. Harms crossed and jaw clenched.

He looked so good like this, silver hair parted to the side and slicked back, his biceps straining against the material of the black jacket he wore. In another instance, you would have probably stopped to appreciate the fact that he looked incredibly hot and felt pressure start to build between your thighs. But at that moment, all you felt was confusion.

“Jimin I don’t understand w-”

“Were you trying to start something back up with her?”

“Who- Jimin please tell me youre not talking about Jeongyeon”

“Oh wow, no honorifics? You guys are still that close huh?”

“Jimin.” you warned, trying to hold back the bite in your voice “I do not appreciate what you’re insinuating.”

He scoffed. “Yeah right, but what else should i have expected from an idol hopper.”

You both froze as soon as the words left his lips. Regret crowded his features in an instant.

“Y/N-”

“What the fuck did you just call me?”

“I didn’t mean-”

The sound of the slap rang out and echoed in the small passageway. Jimin winced but didn't move to soothe the burn on his cheek. Instead, reaching out to you. You stood with your chest heaving and tears filling up your eyes.

“Don't fucking touch me Park Jimin.” you seethed as you turned to walk away

“W-where are you going?’ he had the gall to ask.

“Away,” you said through gritted teeth, your back still turned. You looked at him over your shoulder.

Because if I stay here for one more second they will have to physically drag me off of you.”

#bts x black girl #bts chubby!reader #bts angst #park jimin #kim seokjin #taehuyng #bts namjoon #bts yoongi #bts jung hoseok #unedited #k pop group #jealousy #bts jungkook

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dearsonyeondan · 1 year

Note

Hey! I love your writing! It’s amazing! It’s wonderful to see more representation of bigger girls with the bts fanfic community! So thank you! 💜

I would like to request a college au with Jimin. Jimin is the hot popular athlete and reader is kinda invisible to everyone. They meet and Jimin likes her. But people don’t like it and start to make up these rumours about them both (more so the reader). So reader breaks things off to save Jimin.

Please and thank you! Love your work! 💜

hi anon! thank you for your kind words! i'm so thankful that you enjoy the works i put out. i hope this met your satisfaction as much as possible. readers, caution ahead -- this is a heart jerker. buckle up. . . should i expand on this into a part 2? hm!

꒰ ꒱ pairing: soccer player + barista!jimin x plus size reader

꒰ ꒱ rating: pg

꒰ ꒱ word count: 1.7k.

꒰ ꒱ warning(s): suggested themes, jimin and reader have a past, blonde jimin should be warning enough he's too fine, harsh words to jimin that reader does not mean, unfinished business of an ending.

꒰ ꒱ note 4 reader: enjoy! this is unedited. work below keep reading!

Looking out the window, you watched as campus had been clearing out from the current short term break that was being offered. Christmas was around the corner and due to the storm in your hometown, you'd be spending it on campus alone. There wasn't too much to complain about, however. Your father had done a good job of making sure that you were in a nice apartment where you could bounce between being an introvert and extrovert at the same time. You kept to yourself and often stood out amongst many like a sore thumb. You only had yourself to blame for being interested in going to a PWI and managing to accomplish such with a full academic ride.

Your best friend had been on a plane, so there was nothing left to do besides put on something decent besides your sweat and t-shirt combo of pajamas. Out of your closet, you managed to pull out a hoodie and jean jacket combo with dark ripped jeans and comfortable converse. Your curls had been doing amazing throughout the pre-winter and current fall weather, so a low slicked bun was your go-to. A cafe had been in your interests, so you packed a tote bag with your laptop and some headphones with the idea of premeditated peace.

Pulling your car into a parking spot, you exited while keeping your head low of the other surrounding students who had been up here for a reason gone undetermined by you. It was much quieter inside, but your blood ran cold when you saw Park Jimin. He was...not supposed to be here at this time. Behind the counter with his blonde locks and fitted apron, serving up hot coffee to some hot bimbo with his attractive smile. You were next in line -- not that he'd know because he was too busy smucking it up with the campus sweetheart slash whor-

"__," The sound of his name will never not cause you to freeze. You tried to find somewhere to look - Ah, the menu. "Are you here for your usual caramel macchiato with two pumps of brown sugar and mocha drizzle?" You looked to him with panic, surprise that he remembered. It wasn't that he was cold, but he was different from the last time you'd seen him.

"You're the most warm thing in the room," He said while holding you from the back, trying to catch his breath from the fresh release that both you and him had come down from. Naked and underneath your comforter, he might've been right.

"The air conditioning is on auto, i could turn it on," You said, turning to him and snuggling against him. You looked up from his marked chest and into his eyes, a smile on your features. Of course, he didn't want you to leave the bed. You could feel that in the grip that he had around your waist. Plus size or not, Park Jimin knew how to handle you in all the right ways. Your hands danced throughout his dark curls and he closed his eyes, basking in you and everything that you meant to him.

You remembered when the two of your first interacted. It was an accident, getting jammed in that elevator. He was known all around campus for his many talents and being a heartthrob of course. You hated closed spaces and nothing more than being trapped in that elevator, but he made sure to keep you comfortable that entire time.

You interacted two more times after that, both of them being accidental. The third time was when you'd been one of the only students in the library during Thanksgiving. Of course, he had been horsing around with some girl but you couldn't deny that the sly smile on his features was enough to distract you from the red lipstick that was on the collar of his shirt.

"Are you going to walk home this late?" He asked, the instant regret that you felt coursing through your veins wishing that you'd decided to drive instead of tag along with your study buddy. You nodded your head, gathering your belongings with a smile at your features. His stare lingered and it made you feel a little uncomfortable in the best way? Your cheeks warming over and it wasn't the heater blasting through the air conditioning. "Let me take you home. The temperature is dropping outside."

"You don't have to. I'm around the block from here and I'd rather not be in debt." You slung your backpack over your shoulder, shuffling your hands inside your hoodie before you'd given him a warm smile. He missed it though, too busy checking out the curves that had been hidden underneath your sweater. Plus size and all -- He couldn't keep his eyes off you. "Excuse me," You said, moving past him with the intention of brushing past him and making your way home.

You'll never forget how his hands felt. While they were pleasuring you or his thumb lodged in your mouth to apply pressure to your tongue. The way he knew how to pleasure you just about in every part of your body -- places that you forget to even consider when it came to pleasure.

You'll never forget when the rumors kicked up. The slight speculation about the glances he'd deliver to you when he was on the soccer field after making a goal or catching you roaming around the common ground area when he was with his friends. It was hard to deny that there had been something going on when he was a little too drunk and almost kissed you when you'd gone to one of your first and last campus parties.

You'll never forget the online bullying that you suffered from. People had thought that Jimin was only dealing with you because he'd been behind in a class or was participating in some sort of bet. Accusations of your weight and off guard pictures of you doing something just as regular as eating. No, you won't forget how the dance team surrounded you in the alleyway of your apartment while dropping your trash off and threatened to have you expelled if you continued to associate with him. Not even just yourself, but getting Jimin removed from his throne on campus and shunning him out. Knowing that he wanted a future in entertainment, you couldn't let that happen.

So you ghosted.

"Can you hurry up? I'm in a bit of a rush here," Someone said behind you said, causing you to snap from your old reality and into your current reality. You nodded your head and ordered exactly what he said, pressing your hand into your forehead as you'd gone to sit by the window. You continued to hear Jimin's sweet giggle and it was becoming all too much.

You stood from the table and mentally said fuck it, exiting the shop without your coffee. It was ridiculous how much you couldn't tell him the truth, but reputations needed to be protected.

"Hey, you left without your coffee!" Jimin said, grabbing your arm lightly which caused you to turn around. The regret of smelling his sweet cologne and a soft smile to match. You took your coffee without a word, shaking your head to actually shake him from your brain. "Why do you keep avoiding me?"

"It's better this way. Okay?" You spat at him, furrowing your brows and avoiding his expression. You could tell from the slump of his shoulders and darkened expression that he wasn't pleased. He'd tame your attitude on a regular last year with orgasms behind orgasms that made you forget how to even form an attitude. It was different now. "Can you move from in front of my car? I need to leave."

"No."

"What?"

"I said no, __," Jimin folded his arms over his chest, ignoring the surrounding reactions from strangers that were close enough to hear it. You looked to him as though he'd lost his rabbit ass mind.

"You're crazy." You said, half of your body in your car and half of it out.

"I never took you as a selfish person, but I'm finding out that you are." He spat. Your expression of surprise faltered more than you'd like to admit and your eyes swelled. Selfish? You? "How could you disappear on me after making me...Did you just want to use me for my status?"

You scoffed aloud, not even believing that he believed what he'd been accusing you of. Of course, you had take into consideration the rumors that were being spread and the fact that people were fat-shaming and threatening to have the both of you expelled. Both of your futures had been at stake and it was your decision to simply make all that go away. "You might want to watch your mouth or you might find out something that's true," This was the only way.

"I didn't use you for your status. You were nothing but an amazing orgasm after a hard day of doing something you could never do. You've had a full ride access to everything in your life, so excuse me for wanting to relieve stress with the campus dick that was already being talked about. You were a good fuck, never anything more to me, Jimin. Isn't that what guys like you do to girls?" You tilted your head with a smirk, eyes overspilling. You couldn't control them. "Why do you care? Get back to serving your coffees and while you're doing that, remember the position you'll never have again in my life."

Despite the crack of your voice at your last few words, it was impactful enough for him to chuckle and nod his head. He lowered his head and covered his mouth area, processing the words that probably did more damage than you ever intended to do. You swallowed thickly, wondering why you'd been waiting here for him to respond. Why?

Nothing was said though. He looked around, suffering from embarrassment that you could only come up with as being rejected from a fat girl. He ran his fingers through his blonde hair, watery eyes looking at you one last time before he sniffed and walked off.

The entire car ride home had been full with nothing but silence and your occasional sobbing. You promised yourself to contain it as best as you could, eyes flickering to the coffee cup that had been in its respectful cupholder. Something in your heart ached and you just wished that it would get easier as the hours passed on. That coffee rested in your kitchen and the intuitive part of you knew..

You had broken Jimin's heart.

#bts one shot #bts fanfction #bts fanfic #bts jimin #networkbangtan #bts #bts x you #bts x chubby reader #plus size reader #bts headcanons #bts x reader #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #bts taehyung

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hopeonthebed · 13 days

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pleaseeeeeeee can anyone recommend me some bts x chubby reader stories?😔 specifically speaking, a polyamorous relationship between jjk+kth with the reader.

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bts-fanfic-sideblog · 9 months

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Uhhh I made another concept about a Mafia!Jin x fem!reader on my accidentally deleted account… so I’m just gonna retell it here (because I can’t control myself and i haven’t posted in awhile)

Ok so Jin is big mafia dude and reader is like a plant shop owner that occasionally sets up a stall at a farmer’s market

She makes different sauces each time she’s at the market as an example of what people can make with the herbs she sells at her store

And Jin is the main person who cooks for the rest of the boys so he sometimes wanders around the flea market for fresh ingredients

And one day he finds reader’s stall while she made gnocchi with homemade pesto sauce

She offers Jin a taste because she notices that he’s been lurking around her stall, staring at the pasta

So they get talking and flirting back and forth and eventually Jin has to leave, but reader lets him have the rest of the pasta and sauce

So jin gets home all smiley, and the boys DEFINITELY take notice that he’s in a good mood

They pester him for answers but he simply smiles and shrugs it off

It keeps happening for months and the boys notice new food in their fridge every so often that Jin DID NOT COOK and they’re all confused

So one day they follow Jin to the market like scooby doo style (poking their heads in a single line behind a wall) and they see Jim flirting with one of the vendors and basically think “WHO IS OUR FATHER FLIRTING WITH” and act like kids that are scandalized when they see their parents kiss

In the middle of Jin and reader’s conversation he hears the guys arguing and talking loudly so he freezes a second before excusing himself for a second

He walks over to them and basically whisper yells “what the hell are you doing here” and drags them home after saying goodbye to the reader

It’s basically gonna be mainly fluff because i cant will myself to make them sad.

Jin and the rest of them being mafia dudes doesn’t really play a huge part in the plot, maybe something will happen with reader being used as in a hostage situation against Jin but I’ll figure it out later

I just want this to be really cute and domestic for fun

#bts x chubby reader #bts x reader #chubby!reader #jin x reader #bts mafia au #mafia!jin #jhope x reader #jimin x reader #namjoon x reader #jungkook x reader #mafia!bts #yoongi x reader #taehyung x reader #jin x chubby!reader #mafia!bts x reader

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mother2monsters · 2 months

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So….. hey 👋🏽. Longtime fic reader and long time secret writer 😂.

I write but never post really 😂 honestly I feel like my writing is 🗑️ but I digress. But I can’t ever really find what I’m looking for (except for one writer who is phenomenal but she isn’t really writing anymore) so I decided to try my hand myself.

I decided to put it out there to see if there’s any interest. I’ll start posting snippets of what I have to test the waters 😅😅

Full disclosure…. I’m into almost everything so you never know what you might get. Mainly black coded older reader. Some MxM.

Some of my favorites are sub!yandere BTS, poly BTS x reader, supernatural, A/B/O…. I’m greedy, what can I say. Like Pokémon, gotta catch them all 🙌🏽😅

#bts x black reader #bts x noona #bts ot7 x reader #jungkook x black reader #poly! bts x reader #bts x black noona #idol!bts x noona!reader #bts sub yandere idol #sub!bts x black!reader #namjoon x black reader #yoongi x plus size reader #yoongi x black reader #jimin x black reader #taehyung x black reader #bts needy #bts x plus size reader #bts x chubby reader #hoseok x reader #jin x reader

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candywife333 · 10 months

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Endlessly

A short one shot from my blurb bucket list.

Tears dripped down my face in torrents as I realized what I had to do. I had to leave this man. He didn't love or respect me. He never even wanted to be a friend. This marriage had shown me how much more I didn't belong in his life. I know he thought he was above me. I could tell by how he treated me throughout the entire duration of our sad little marriage.

Our parents were family friends. His parents were business tycoons who wanted to marry their son Park Jimin off to me, a hopeless nobody according to Jimin’s assessment of me throughout our schooling years. He had treated me like dust beneath his shoe when we were both in the same middle school and high school. We ran in the same circles as my parents owned a fancy bakery in the nice part of town. My parents had grown up with his parents and though we were never anywhere as rich as them, my parents provided me a comfortable upbringing. Jimin’s parents were extremely kind people who never acted arrogant, even though they owned a chain of extremely lucrative hotels.

At the age of 16 Jimin had a Mercedes Benz, Rolex watch, a separate outhouse next to his parent’s estate, and the attention of any girl he wanted.

At the same age, I had my cat, Sugarplum, my teddy bear, Roosevelt, my parents and our bakery. That was enough to tell you how different we were from one another. For some ridiculous reason, his parents thought that I would be the best girl to marry him to. I remember that day when I was paralyzed by shock when I came back from school one day to find them all in my living room. His mother, Mrs. Park had cracked open a warm smile as she saw me standing in from of the door as I awkwardly greeted them.

My mom came from the kitchen exclaiming in a voice filled with hidden glee, “ Oh, Y/N. Baby, you are back from school. How was your day? Got any articles published for the school newspaper?” I quietly responded, “Yeah mom, getting ready to finalize some edits.” As I walked into the living room gingerly, thinking it was only Ms. Park and my mom, Jimin came in with my dad and his dad from our back yard. Mr. Park chimed in joyously, “ Y/n , You have grown so much. What a beautiful girl you have become.” Jimin coughed silently, laughing under his breath as I grimly realized that he didn’t share the same sentiment as his dad.

I couldn’t see what Mr. Park meant either since I had just worn jeans and a long sleeve top to school. But I had not been brought up lacking manners, so I replied, “Thank you Mr. Park. Very kind of you to say so. How have you been doing? Would you like me to get you and Ms. Park some tea and cake?” The brightly smiling older man chuckled in a pleased fashion, “Why don’t you do that sweetheart. We have some good news for you when you come back.”

I walked into the kitchen puzzled at what he was referring to. I came back with the refreshments and set then down on the table as my mom said, “Why don’t we let Y/N first finish college and then we can plan the wedding?” I almost fell off the couch. I felt like I had been slapped by a fish. What the freaking hell did she mean marriage!?? Were they trying to sell me off like a week old salmon in a fish market? And to who?

I exclaimed in a rather nervous tone, “Mother, what are you talking about? What is going on here?” Mrs. Park started in a placating tone, “Sweet heart we were just talking about when Jimin and you would be married.” I almost choked as I screamed in terror, “EXCUSE ME?!” Mr. Park smiled as he continued, “Darling don’t frighten Y/N. Sweetheart don’t worry. We will wait till you and Jimin finish your under grad degrees and then we will plan the engagement and get you two hitched. It won’t be immediate. You will have time to get to know him.” Jimin sat there in silence with a neutral mask on his face as my face contorted in terror, making me retreat upstairs in utter shock.

I could hear my dad say, “What do you say Jimin? Ready to take on your dad’s company?” I could hear as Jimin replied in a resolute manner , “Of course uncle. Once I get my business degree and finish my MBA, I will be able to take care of Y/N properly.”

Contrary to what everyone thought, Jimin proceeded to treat me like an invisible being throughout the duration of our college years as well. We had ended up at our hometown college which happened to rank pretty highly across the country. Though I didn’t agree with this supposed marriage which both our parents had come up with, I thought we would at least get to know each other as friends. And then maybe eventually as a couple if we suited each other.

Jimin and I had run in different circles all throughout high school and middle school. The same trend continued in college. He hung out with other extremely handsome and privileged guys who would also eventually take over their family businesses as heirs. Just as he did in high School, he had a loyal fan following of beautiful well bred girls whose sole existence in college was to trap rich man in marriage. Anytime I would come across him, I would greet him.

He would walk past me as though he never heard me. The girls he would hang with would always be teeming around him in a protective pentagon. He sure was satanic. His behavior and the way he acted above all others in school had not changed. To top all this behavior all off with a cherry, he was known around campus for having a new girl every month. His dipshit friend Jungkook, had coined the term, “new flavor of the month”, to describe his excessively promiscuous and nonchalant behavior.

To my utter dismay, this man who I had known to never be husband material, continued to exemplify that he was the farthest thing from husband material the world had ever seen. He was as similar to husband material, as polyester was to silk. I had had some faith in the fact that he may change his behavior initially. As we almost ended our college years, I could tell that he wouldn’t change and he would carry this dismal behavior into a marriage that I never even wanted.

I told my mother numerous times as college ended, “ Please mom. Why do I have to marry him? He has the pick of the lot, so many attractive rich girls. Why me? Can’t he just marry one of those.” I started sobbing in frustration as I bit out in desperation , “He doesn't even greet me mom. He doesn't acknowledge my existence. He hates me. I don’t want to marry someone who hates me. You know me mom. I can’t survive with someone who hates my guts, someone who disrespects me. I am the closest thing to a fiancé he has and he doesn't even want to be friends. Why do you and father insist on ruining my life this way?”

To my shock my mother started crying as well as she morosely said, “ I am so sorry my baby. I didn't know that he was treating you this way. His parents and I always thought he was a well mannered child so we had betrothed you to him when you were barely 10. His dad has a really bad heart condition. And since his dad and mom were your godparents, they wanted you to marry him because you are such a good girl. His father may pass soon, and he wanted see his son wedded to you before he passed.”

“His parents really think you are the best person for Jimin. You are solid, trustworthy, loyal, beautiful, loving and a hard worker. Nobody in their circles, no matter how rich or vain they may be, amount to you in worth.” Your mother continued in a serious tone, “But sweetheart, if he is treating you like trash, I will tell his parents that this won’t work. They can find someone else for his ungrateful ass.”

You laughed for the first time in a long time as your mother started cussing out Jimin for being a turd. But knowing yourself you knew what decision you would take. Your godparents had been there for you since you were born. They had taken care of you and your parents when your parents were initially setting up the bakery.

You decided it then and there. You would marry Jimin and be with him for a few years. When it would get unbearably hard, when you would feel like dying, you would leave him. Inevitably the marriage would die, it was just a matter of time. And, you would be giving your godfather the gift of a wedding for his son.

I laughed bitterly as my sob fest ceased. It had been 5 long years since your marriage to Jimin at the age of 21. His father had been elated to see him married off to you. They treated me better than their own daughter this entire time. It almost made up for how badly Jimin had treated me. But that's the thing, almost was never enough. Every person had their limits. And I had hit mine.

I started packing away whatever clothes you could fit into the suitcases. It had been enough. His cold behavior towards me, the disrespect of having random women over at the house, the disregard towards me as a partner. The tipping point had been when I was about to visit him at his office and heard moaning coming from inside the room.

In these five years of being married to him I had developed a prowess as a writer and published so many books that had became a best seller. Under your clandestine alias, Strawberry, I had now accumulated a personal net worth of 50 million dollars USD. This progress had deemed me financially independent. I had never touched Jimin’s money since the beginning of the relationship. Whenever we went to galas with him for the purpose of PR for his company, he had provided me money to buy clothes and accessories.

I had always been a chubby girl who wore glasses and nondescript clothing. But Jimin and most of the world didn't know that I had a personal sense of fashion and beauty sequestered in my closet ready to unleash to the world once I divorced this ungrateful shit. The plan to leave had been in the works since the day of the wedding. Five years of building, brooding, working hard, and patience had earned me the right to a divorce. Even when I married him, he never tried to get to know me.

I had tried to be his friend, taking care of him when his dad was sick in the hospital on multiple occasions. There were days Jimin didn't even get out of bed because of the sheer misery of his father’s condition. I had supported him that time, sleeping with him when he was lonely and crying in bed in the middle of the night. We had separate bedrooms, but he had come crying to my bed at midnight one night , sobbing profusely as he crumbled into my arms. “I--I-I can’t do this y/N, I can’t see him die with my own eyes. I love my dad, I can’t imagine life without him.”

He wretched and sobbed for what seemed like eternity as he lay in my bed, snuggled in my arms as he tried catching his breath. I had stroked him on the head, patting him on his back, rocking him to bed as though he were a baby. At the time he had settled against me exhausted with his arms encompassing my waist. His face had burrowed into my chest as he fell asleep, tired from his crying fit. This incident had repeated itself so many times during the course of our marriage. The worst part was when he would act like a completely different person every morning after his crying tirades. He would seek solace in my arms in the nights and become like a cold, impenetrable version of himself the very next day. I was his emotional support animal, and he was the man I could never call my own.

Reminiscing all those times made silent tears trail down my face as I faced the whiplash of memories. I had tried making him breakfast, packing his lunches, and had tried my hardest to at least be his friend if I could not be his partner. He would let me do all this for him, without appreciation or gratitude. He would eat my food and treat me like a stranger. Treat me like I had never existed. He never remembered my birthday, never concerned himself with my needs.

When I had tried to kiss him on his lips, trying to making the first move one time, he had spelled out in no uncertain terms, “ You are only my wife in name. Don’t try to make this relationship anything else than what it should be, a PR relationship. And how could you think I would ever be attracted to you? Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror? Learn to take care of yourself. How could you continue to look like a slob your whole life? You’ve seen who I dated in school since we were kids. Did any of them ever look like you?”

He walked away like nothing had happened, as I crumbled to the ground crying, injured by the one person I had tried so hard to get close to. That night had led me to understand that he was way above my league, at least according to his standards. If this was a PR relationship, then why did he cry to me at night? Why did he come to me wounded, expecting me to complete him and in the same breath stab me in the heart for caring?

I had to leave. I had to leave. I had to.

JIMIN’S POV

As most marriages go, they are usually banal affairs. Unexciting and monotonous. Duties and responsibilities littered my brain as I came home early. As I looked for the wife I would never in a million years have thought would be mine, I stumbled upon some photos in her room. Nudes of a full figured girl dominated the frame of the polaroid photos scattered around the floor. I choked in utter shock at the slip of a stocking and a flash of her bosom.

I picked up the photos, shocked at how beautiful they looked. This was my wife? The quiet girl who even in our school days simply seemed like the kind girl next door? She wore these stockings underneath her everyday clothes? My pants felt uncomfortably tight as I ventured further into her room.

Why were clothes littered all over her room? She was usually extremely organized. She ran our house as tight as a captain would run their ship. Everything was always cleaned and in its place. As I ventured further into her room, I saw piles of lingerie of shapes and sizes I never imagined on her bed. Where was she ? And what was she doing with all these clothes? If it wasn't for me, then who was she entertaining? Rage filled my gut as I couldn't imagine her betraying me with another man.

On the bed, I saw official documents. One word caught my eye, filling me with dread, my panic continued to rise as a I clutched papers to my face with latent fury. It read, “DIVORCE SETTLEMENT DOCUMENTS”. I yelled in a full blown nervousness, “ Y/N where are you? What are you doing? What are these papers?!? Y/N?!”

In the utter chaos wreaking havoc upon my mind, I opened the door to her bathroom, and I almost fainted. Y/N was decorated in a red lace thong with a blood red bra and stockings to match. Her voluptuous stomach gripped the strings of the thong as her thick ass swallowed up the thong string. Stretch marks climbed in spirals along her hips as her bra struggled to house her breasts. Her thick thighs were encased in transparent red thigh high stockings.

I couldn’t even hear her screaming as I continued to stare at her body in undisguised, mind numbing lust and adoration. I had never seen my wife naked. I had never even touched her or any other woman for the entire duration of our marriage. I may be a bastard, but I was loyal to my wife. And my dick that had been dead from the antidepressants and grief at my father’s condition, came to life.

Y/N yelled in frustration, waving her hands in front of me to get out of the room. I marched up to her as the cloud of lust magnified within me. She cowered away from me, placing hands to cover her breasts and pussy. I took hold of her arms easily, wrenching them to the side as I studied her beautiful body up close. If I had known this was how my wife looked like, I would have never made it to work on time every morning.

What startled me was the sniffling though. I panicked as I looked up to see her crying profusely with the most abject grief in her eyes. I had hurt her somehow. She was usually the most neutral, cold faced girl I had ever come across in my life. Her facial expressions never showed emotion except for the times when I would hurt her, when I was so weighed down by the grief of my father that I would lash out at her. Little did she know how elated I was to marry her the day of our wedding.

Growing up an only child without many real friends made me a very unexpressive person, but when I loved someone, I loved them deeply. And my wife was clearly hurt so badly. I had hurt her so badly, that she was considering divorce. As it all clicked into place, I wrapped my arms around her and rocked her in my arms, soothing her, “Tell me what is going on baby? What is happening? What did I do to hurt you? Why are you trying to leave me?”

She tried batting away my arms that settled around her hips and backside. But I wouldn’t let her go. I had messed up so badly and once I saw those papers, my mind whirled with terror. I couldn’t survive without this woman. She was my life source, my rock, and she couldn’t leave me. She shouted out in a cracked voice, “ You don’t love me! YOU DON’T CARE FOR ME. GET AWAY FROM ME!! YOU CAN GO MARRY SOME SKINNY CHIC WHO YOU HAVE BEEN FUCKING IN THE OFFICE DAY AND NIGHT! NOW LET ME GO, YOU TURD!!

I grabbed on to her tighter, confused at her accusations, “Baby what are you talking about? I haven't touched any girl in the five years we have been married.”

She wheezed in disbelief, “Liar, why are you always doing this to me? You are as cold as a stone, you freeze me out when you feel like it. And I heard the moaning coming from your office, and all the women you have been parading around my house, cheating on me with. Well I am done, I have been done for a long time. I am clearly unattractive and ugly and not in shape. I want to leave, I want a divorce. I do not want even a penny from you, but I have to leave. You are not healthy for me. This is not a healthy marriage.”

All of her words hit my like trucks as I begged with her, “Sweetheart, I never meant to make you believe that I have been disloyal. All those women at our house were my business partner’s sisters and family. That’s why they would greet you when they came in to the house. They run a family led corporation , and all of them had come here for business meetings.” As she became quiet, I continued, “ The day you came to see me at the office must have been when my PA twisted her ankle. The physical therapist and I were both in the room with her. She was moaning in pain because it was a completely avulsed tendon. I am so sorry I made you believe otherwise, that you are not the only woman in my life.”

“I know how horribly I conducted my self in school . You always saw me around girls and so you thought that behavior of sleeping around would continue into our marriage. I would never do that to you. You are the only one who truly cares about me. And I was a shallow piece of shit for making you fell unattractive. The day I put you down for your appearance, was the worst day of my life. Dad was getting his prosthetic heart valve replacement surgery and I was so stressed. Mom was crying and I didn’t know what to do, that I lashed out at you when you had nothing to do with it.”

As her crying ceased, she tried to get out of my embrace, but I wouldn’t let her. “Baby, please give me a chance to make it right. I know I have treated you dismally, less than human. But I love you, I have loved you since the day we got married. I just never knew how to show it to you. You have always been so independent, self sufficient, never relying on me for anything. I almost thought you never needed me. And the grief made me an even worse person than I thought I was capable of being.”

Y/N took a huge gulp of air as she exclaimed, “I don’t believe that you are attracted to me or that you love me. You have treated me horribly for years, and I never even felt like we were married. I felt like a roommate who you just used for emotional support. Then you would freeze me out and insult me when I tried to help you. Anyways, you like skinny girls who don’ t look like me, why don’t you just go and find one. I will divorce you and you will never hear from me again. And I will find someone who loves me, who thinks that kissing me and showing affection to me is not a chore.”

I started panicking. I was ridiculously attracted to her from the beginning, but the depression medication had literally made me a sexless creature for the past five years. But now she thought that I was not attracted to her, when in fact it was the medication which I had recently been tapered off of by my doctor. What if I couldn't convince her that it was all the medication? She would leave me, and I would crumble into tiny pieces, because I couldn't live without her.

I explained in a frantic voice, “Baby, it was the medication. I was on antidepressant medication for so long and it killed my sex drive so badly. I couldn’t even have sex if I wanted to, it killed my erection. How can I show you that you are a goddess to me? I don’t even deserve to be next to you. I loved you since we were in 7th grade. But I got so nervous around you that I couldn't even speak when you greeted me. Whenever you would talk to me, I literally felt like dying of nerves. I wanted to talk to you so much when we were going through school, but my anxiety crippled me. I never wanted to make you feel undesirable.”

As she looked at me in indecision, I swooped down to kiss her passionately against her lips, opening up her mouth to receive my tongue. I gripped her exposed butt and squeezed, “Please let me prove to you that you are all I will ever need.” I nuzzled my face against her neck, biting and pecking against it as my hands massaged up her hips, trying to find the string to her thong that I could unravel. Her eyes twinkled with what looked like hope as she whispered, “You can try.”

------Please let me know if I should release the rest of the smut for this one shot.

#jimin x reader #chubby reader x bts #bodyshaming #bodyworship #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts fanfic #angst #troubed marriage #arranged marriage #jimin x chubby reader #smut

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