#but it was annoying me that the pages shared here and on twitter were missing sections. lore is serious business

[atissi]

hadn't seen anyone post the full comic about laios + falin's family on tumblr yet so. here you go source is from the reddit

#in general i haven't seen as many translations of the new content get posted here which is like fine #but it was annoying me that the pages shared here and on twitter were missing sections. lore is serious business #the less lore the average tumblr user knows about the more nonsensical takes i'm forced to read. so im taking direct action #this is the last time im posting manga pages here i don't want to become a manga pages blog #beepbeep.txt #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers

[the-francakes]

Welcome to tumblr now what...

Hi, I wrote this up for my cousin because she’s never used any platform, but since a lot of twitter users are coming to tumblr, I thought I would share as someone that has been here... way too long. This blog might only be a year old, but i lived through tumblarity. both times. ugh. 

cause i will use this interchangeably and forget to clarify, tumblr dash (short for dashboard) is more or less the same as twitter feed. 

likes - these are a thumbs up. A nice little ‘hey this post is cool!’ or ‘i agree with this post.’ users can elect in settings to have their likes visibly on their page, meaning when you go to their actual tumblr, theres a link to liked posts. however, i have always disabled this in the same vein that none of you will ever see my ao3 history. if you get a like, you’ll get notified, but that’s all it really does in the grand scheme of things. 

reblogs - if theres a post you want to share, reblog it.  reblogging it puts it on the dash (feed) of anyone that follows you. tumblr does have a setting to see popular posts, ‘in your orbit,’ or ‘for you’ as in things it thinks you may like.  it has a setting for recommended posts into your feed. i, and mostly everyone i know, disable these features and rely solely on their dash.  so assume if you’re reblogging this post, you’re sharing it to make sure the people that follow you also see it. if no one reblogs this post, then only the 150 people that follow me will see it and it will die. which is totally cool. im rambling all over this shit and forgot what capital letters are. its probably half wrong anyways. 

some people will say always reblog instead of like. i think its give or take. it depends on what you like, what you want to share, you’re weird taste in shit you want people to know about and not know. if you reblog, you will make sure more people see something wonderful and its a really lovely and free way to help writers, artists, etc. spread their art.

commenting on a reblog - its not necessary.  I probably do it once in a blue moon these days.  adding a comment in your reblog is like jumping into the conversation. usually i reserve this for things that are important and want others to build on as well. or continue the shitpost cause i like to think im funny sometimes. if its something like my bullshit commentary that really does not apply to anything in the post or i dont want spread on everyone’s dash as they go on to reblog it, i write it in the tags. for example, please reblog this and add anything i missed that helps you navigate tumblr. write in the tag if you think its bullshit and i should delete. 

replies - replies were made because when they didn’t exist, people would have ‘dash conversations’ by reblogging one post over and over and over and over again.  it would be a post of 50+ posts of two people having a conversation and about things like is it red or blood orange.  this was especially awful in rp when sometimes posts would only be a few sentences asking ‘hey whats up how are you.’ so use a reply if you want to tell the original poster something, but youre not adding onto the post.  a good reply to this post would be a ‘thanks for posting this’ but a good reblog with a comment would be ‘i agree, but also you forgot this important bit!’ 

something different than twitter (i think???) - your replies do not just show up on someone’s dash. they have to click the little word bubble on the post to read them. 

tagging - tagging someone with an @ will give them a notification that you mentioned them in your post.  you can also tag in replies.  you don’t need to tag the original poster in a reply because they will get a notif that says ‘___ replied to your post.’ my brain is fuzzy here, but i believe if you put a reply on a post that is a reblog, both the current poster/reblogger and the original poster will get notifs. i only say this cause some people get annoyed by too much tagging, but as someone that doesnt give a shit, just always tag me. tumblr eats shit or doesnt work sometimes, so just blow up my notifs. 

asks/submit - some people enable you to ask or submit posts.  when they answer the ask or approve the submission, it will end up as a post on their dash.  if the ask is not anon, they can also reply privately. a lot of people do not allow anons these days because while tumblr is one of the better social medias ive encountered, there are still some assholes that like to send hate anons. and i will say this for the people skimming this - ASKS GET EATEN. aka they disappear from asks boxes or don’t even show up. if someone says they didn’t get it, there’s probably like an 80% chance they are not lying. there’s a 20% chance they are and don’t want to answer it but like that’s their choice too. 

messaging - for the new kids, this is DMing. for the cool kids in back, this feature was enabled cause aol took aim away from us. this caused a huge panic of how do we privately talk to our friends since while replies are okay for convos, anyone can see them and tbh can get cumbersome for longer communication.  i use this feature a lot to send my friends posts that i need to make sure they see.  maybe its not my sort of content id reblog, but i know for a sure thing they will love it, so im passing it along for them to reblog, laugh at, tell me im an asshole cause its a meme making fun of them, etc. 

ask games - sometimes people reblog posts that say SEND ME A NUMBER and theres a list of numbered questions.  as i grew up here in roleplay, i was taught it was good tumblr etiquette to always send numbers to the person you reblogged from. I was also taught just to send numbers if you see them cause you’re cultivating friendships here and maybe you don’t know the person, but TRUST ME, they will love and appreciate you took the time to get to know them just a little. its not hard to send 1-5 and then fuck off but it will give them something fun to do and maybe make their entire day so.. send the numbers. 

WHAT YOU SHOULD PAY ATTENTION TO: who interacts with your posts a lot. do you see the same username liking your things? does the person reply a lot. FOLLOW THEM! reply to their posts! fangirl from afar and send a shy ask saying hi i love you. propose on the dash.  answer their questions. become FRIENDS. we’re all the weird kids here so don’t worry, we love you already. 

WHAT NOT TO DO: NEVER STEAL POSTS OR CONTENT. this means, you see a pretty piece of art- reblog it. do not right click, copy link to image, and make your own post.  love a passage someone wrote? see a HILARIOUS joke? do not copy and paste it into your own post.  If you feel in someway you NEED to do this, contact the original poster, ask permission and how they want to be credited.  you might have to link to their tumblr, you might have to link to their tumblr, ig, ao3, website, mom’s best friends snapchat, whatever... you listen to how they want to be credited and respect it. and if they say no? go reblog it and sit down. this is the same how you would never copy and paste someone’s tweet and say it as your own. or would you???? is that a thing??? maybe i shouldn’t be helping you come here... 

ALSO, JUST LIKE AO3, NOTES MEAN NOTHING. a lot of notes does not mean its a great post. Something can have 500 notes and its two friends shitposting ‘hi’ back and forth in the replies 250 times each.  and yes, this has happened before and will happen again because this is a hellscape. 

crabs/april fools/tumblarity/fonts and colors/xkit - you know how in YOU they have those like seven totems of living in LA? same concept except when you understand it all, you’re cursed to live here forever. you’re welcome. 

--- --- --- 

please expand, add to this, tell me im wrong, tell me to get off tiktok cause i need to stop yelling at children to let me love my favorite ships idc what canon says.  

the good news is, if you think you’re doing it wrong, then youre using tumblr right.  people might say don’t use it like a diary, but you bet ill write a long ass post venting about my depression and/or that my sock has a hole in the toe.  people say posts have to have content and length... brevity is the soul of wit or whatever and i love a good shitpost and i will reblog a post that is legit ‘wish i could pet a dog today.’ 

#tumblr #twitter #don't forget to feed your horse

[skepticalkoi-catastrophe]

❝ ❤ 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝒦𝒾𝓁𝓁𝒶 🔪 ❞

Slasher oc x BlackFem!oc

⇸ Paring - Slasher oc [@BUNII_ on Twitter] x Reader!oc

⇸The following SMAU fanfic is inspired by the movie Scream, the 2015 MTV Scream TV series and fanficThe Final Girl by @ghoularaki . Comments, Reblogs, and Shares are heavily appreciated. Please enjoy ~ ♥︎

⇸ ⚠️ Warning/Genre ⚠️ Horror, slight comedy, interracial couple, slightly angst, fluff, social media au, senior high school/slasher au, character deaths ( major & minor), blood, detailed gore, eventual smut, explicit sexual themes, slow burn, strangers to friends au, friends to lovers au, childhood friends to lovers au.

⇸ Quick Sum up: ❝A rise in missing persons reports render a small town afraid and helpless. But when Ashe, the towns goody two shoes, gets thrown in the middle of copycat killing spree, an unknown contact comes to protect her from the shadows.❞

Word count - 1,452

Next chapter  ➽ 

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↳    Suprise, Suprise    ↲

"So why exactly are you here again?" August grunts, raising Ashe aloft by your hips for her to reach the top half of the bookshelf. "You said this wouldn't take all day."

"It will if you don't hold on a little longer." She stage whispers. "I've almost got it."

Rumor has it an old copy of the Draycott's archives was stored in the school's library in case someone steals the real one from the town hall building. But no one's been able to find it since Principal Doushaw had it removed for a while until he put it back in hiding.

Ashe sticks her tongue out to focus extending her arm in the direction of the book's location. She pulls out the copy, it was littered with dust and its paper reeked with age.

"I got it you can put me down now."

August lowers her, him peering over her. The heavy book rests in her hands, with tanned pages, and some pages are torn. Ashe flips through, but her face sours.

"The fuck? It's gone? It should be right here..."

"What should be right here?" August is thrown off by her response and held the back cover in his hand. The page Ashe was looking for was replaced with a folded over square of paper. He slowly rips it from the page, opening it to reveal its words.

"Excuse me young lady what do you think you are doing?" The librarian scowls.

Ashe withholds the book behind her back.

"It's not what it-"

Turns out she was talking to some other girl. She exhales in relief.

She opens it again taking the note and shoving it in her pocket. There had to be more but they ran out of time as the lunch bell rings.

"We'll come back later Auggie, you still have to treat me to lunch remember?"

He sucks his teeth side-eyeing her.

Slinging her bag on her shoulders, she pokes his cheek smugly smiling while walking ahead.

"How's about Chick Fil A?

◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤

Facing the window at the back of the classroom, Ashe laid her head on her folded arms as she tried napping before her AP French class started. Even so, her eyes shot open when the door was slammed open.

'You've gotta be fuckin kiddin' ' She thought annoyed, her head still on her arms.

The person's footsteps stopped right in front of her desk, its chair moving for them to take a seat. They haven't spoken.

In the glass's reflection, their big doe eyes were adorably glazed in nervousness. They gulped down the lump in their throat to calm themself. Softly tapping her desk, she slowly lifted her head a bit.

"Hello to you too Ryver." She yawns.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" Propping her hand up, her chin resting in her palm.

His hand flinched back.

"H-hey Ashe. Sorry about the door. I asked Sinclair where you were so I could check in on you. You didn't come yesterday. I wanted to know if you were alright."

She senses his unease, shaking her head to reassure him. "It's okay Ryver I understand. You're not the only one who was but I appreciate it."

Ryver nods, shifting his glances around the empty room and playing with his hair. His bunny-Esque teeth peek out from his plump lips as he flashed her a smile. Was he this much of a nervous wreck when they met before?

"It's just been a long day. Nothing a quick nap can't fix." Ashe lays her head back down. "Wake me when the teacher shows up 'kay?"

He was about to reply when without warning both their phone's notifications go off. Gasps are heard outside the classroom.

To her horror, it was a video of the masked stalker from the pep rally. The video was glitching like a VHS tape but the audio was clear.

"Greetings Draycott High. It seems we haven't met. But one of you has..."

Their voice is gruff as they continue.

"Don't worry kitten your time will come but for now there's the queen who must be dethroned."

Ashe's chest tightened rising from her seat.

"The prince is valuable so he too will be spared. If you found my note, you should take another look at it. You'll miss your first clue little kitten."

Crumbled in her pocket she pulls out the note, Ryver freezes and stares.

"There are many things that aren't as they seem to children. So many realities will come crashing down because the truth is too heavy of a burden to bear. Do you have what it takes to stop it?"

The masked figure pauses. Their face was hidden by a red demonic skull.

"Here's your chance to prove yourself. Shine a light on five eyes to truly see. I wish you luck."

Following their statement, the video abruptly cuts. Highly strung Ryver fixes his gaze on Ashe's crinkled nose and creased brows as she stands upright from her chair. She makes off with the note not looking back.

"Ashe wait!" Ryver calls keeping chase.

Her Converses screeching against the tiled hallway en route towards the bathroom she's stopped. Crashing into the chest of another their arms wrapped around her so she wouldn't fall back from the impact.

"Woah Woah, Ashe?- " August held her meeting her eyes. They were tearing.

He slowly took her hands, them shaking violently. "It's okay, take deep breaths for me, focus on your breathing. Focus on my voice."

Ryver halted behind a wall, his heart beating in his ears. There has to be something he can do. What could he do?

He peeks around the wall but she and him were gone.

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Brisk air filled the infirmary as they rest on one of the beds. Her knees are pulled into her chest in the fetal position, August laying behind her. His hands were at her waist and her back flush against his chest. His chin atop her head as he looks out the window.

Nurse Maisie stepped out to bring them snacks, more so to give them privacy. He hated seeing her like this but he knows he's her anchor and wouldn't change her for the world. Ashe's sleeping figure turned over, nuzzling closer into his neck. The breathing exercises he learned calmed her down, in time lulling her to sleep.

He's been there through every one of her attacks though it dosen't get any easier seeing her moisten cheeks. He cradles the back of her head, kissing her forhead when Ashe's phone vibrates.

Her and the girl's group chat notification lit up.

◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤◢◤

After school, Ashe was driven home during the carpool however August decided to stay the night with her. The corner meximart was open so they bought a two-liter bottle of soda and ice cream for their pizza dinner Ashe's mom ordered via Doordash. She wasn't home again, something about the autopsy taking longer than expected. As for what'll happen with the video, digital forensics is looking into it.

That gave her somewhat peace of mind.

Locking the doors and windows, they got comfortable. Pajamas from August's previous sleepovers were laid out on Ashe's bed as she waited for him after his shower. Shaking down her underwear drawer for a pair, an envelope wrapped in her boyshorts hits the carpet. Its contents spill out, she kneeled lifting them.

A gold chain necklace laced her fingers as she lifted it, an engraved ring hanging from it. Dated polaroid photos with a dried rose and a handwritten letter rest in her hands. She shook her head giving a rueful half-smile.

'Why'd you have to leave...' She thought.

"Ashe where are the toothbrushes?"

Frantically she shoves the items back in the drawer shutting it.

"They're under the sink Auggie."

Ding went the doorbell downstairs. She had her knife concealed in her hoodie sleeve while walking downstairs. Through the peephole, the pizza guy stood with their extra-large cheese pie. She unlocks the door, her breathing slightly staggering.

Swinging it open, she greets him taking the box from his hands and wishing him a good night. Ashe set the box on the kitchen counter. On her tippy toes, she reaches for the ceramic plates when one slips from her fingertips. August catches the plate with his free hand keeping the other on her hip.

"Nice Spidey Sense Carrot Top."

His chin leaned on the top of her shoulder pulling her closer. Dampened orange curls stuck to his forehead and his tired sweet hue of spring clovers meet her polished amber gaze.

"You're welcome, Mary Jane."

He whispers caressing her silken skin underneath her tank top.

Unperceived, her phone sat on her bed upstairs vibrating. Her call log was filled with multiples missed from one contact.

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Tag list- @ebonyslasher @house-of-elves @peachjaem00 @nastyatticman @itzgabz22 @lxstfuleclipse @strxwberry-milku @iloveslasher @luna-ashe

If you'd like to be added to the tag list, please comment below or dm me. I hope you enjoy ~

#black reader insert #black y/n #slasher oc #slasher imagines #slasher x s/o #black reader #slasher x black!reader #slasher fanfiction #slasher x reader #slashers #slasher original character #reader x oc #black oc #black female characters #black female oc #scream au #social media au #serial killer!au #high school au #oc lore #lore drop #smau #scary movie #slasher x y/n #slasher x you #slasher fluff #slash fanfiction #horror movie #horror au #final girl

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Wed 2 June ‘21

Louis sent a message to a fan looking for a hello after a major surgery-- “Get well soon mate. Sending you loads of love x”- and added that he hopes ALL of us are doing alright; I never doubted it Louis! Niall got a little more specific with his really lovely message today- “HAPPY PRIDE MONTH, BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE. It’s your life, LOVE who you want to LOVE,” he tweeted! THANKS GUYS.

Liam though, Liam was all over today! He checked in on his way to play golf, on his way back from playing golf (with videographer Conor!), posted comments on discord, joined a new chat platform (Telegram; 5 minutes into Telegram and chill Liam was like OKAY it looks like we may need some moderators for this app lol YOU THINK?), he did a whole 25 min live, AND checked in even later to say he’d just had a shower and was about to play a new video game! New news of the day-- he is going to host a Veeps show showcasing new artists in July!! NEAT! His post about how his team forgot to turn off notifications on the phone they set it all up on for him on is really funny, YIKES; “this used to be an iphone now it’s just a bell” he joked, with video of the phone frantically chiming nonstop (“the power of you guys still blows my mind to this day”.) Also he said that he was very busy getting ready for June 15. Why, you ask, what is on June 15? UH? IDK?? He has so many things coming up? But that’s the NFT I think, which I KNOW a lot of people are mostly not that excited about but I will say that while I don’t care about the technology, I am excited to see Liam’s artwork he’s working on for it (which hopefully the purchaser will share with us), and Liam is truly so excited about the platform, he’s really trying to talk us into it. More on that in a sec...

But let’s get to the other parts of Liam’s live first. He has that new song coming, about which he said “it’s one that I’ve written the most on so far actually, as a single, I’m excited to say my own stuff for once a little”, love that. He’s still coughing but says he’s tested repeatedly and it isn’t COVID, and that he’s gone vegetarian recently, and he says the chat channels were inspired by seeing people using the veeps chat rooms even after the show ended, not wanting to leave. And he talks about 1D- about the notifs mishap he said “back in the band we used to wait for people we didn’t like to leave their notifications on and then we would like- oh make sure you follow this person on twitter! And then their phone would break for days- if someone did something that annoyed you.” HAHAHA where’s my masterpost of people who annoyed them 1D told us to follow, PLEASE? And also “it’s hard sometimes you’re watching people stories from afar that you used to know so well and that can be difficult… we’ve all felt this at different times me and the boys… it’s almost like missing a very dear friend a lot of the time but everyone’s so busy… I’d love to get us all in a room somewhere sometime” aww. But also he said he talked to Harry recently, “really a lovely call, he has a sixth sense for if I'm struggling or if one of us is in trouble, I spoke to him and it was a really lovely catch up. I have a lot of love for the man, he's really, really great"; well I wish Liam wasn’t stuggling but that’s lovely. And Louis too! "I spoke to Louis, I wanna say yesterday. We speak a lot, there's just a lot of laughing about random crap," he said, plus some Louis memories- “I can just hear his laugh in the back of my mind. We once broke into one of the stadiums in America and got chased by a woman… on one of those cop type things, a mall cop thing, and that was quite crazy. He also left me on my own while I was being arrested nearly by a French policemen that I had to push over… which that still scares me to this day. [laughing] That’s what friends are for! I helped him over the fence to get in somewhere, he left me with the policeman, who didn’t have a clue who I was and tried to arrest me even though I was just trying to go into my hotel.” UMM sorry I can’t hear anything past LIAM PUSHED OVER A COP?? Go ahead, make a list of ‘1D members most likely to fight a cop’ and if Liam isn’t DEAD LAST you’re just wrong and yet HERE WE ARE!! WHAT A DAY.

But alas rather than fighting cops now Liam is partnering with an entrepreneur (which I have had to type so many times in the last two days thanks to Liam that I guess I know how to spell it now they just keep SAYING it SO MUCH). Steve Bartlett said “the secret” is out, he recorded a podcast with Liam yesterday-- I’d call secret a bit strong, we had actually got that mate, but okay; he called Liam an entrepreneur and said “yesterday I recorded one of the most powerful, honest, REAL conversations on my podcast to date” and “if you love Liam you’ll love this.” I can absolutely guarantee you that is not true, I love Liam and already hate everything about this collab, but his wording does make me think we’ll get a bit of Liam’s trademark emotional spillage which I suppose I might appreciate despite this self help CEO guy being there too. Liam does have one thing to say that could sway me in this guy’s favor though- “he has the cutest dog ever” apparently! Anyway I may as well get used to him he’s suddenly everywhere-- Liam also patched him into his live to try yet again to convince us that NFTs are good by awkwardly relating it to “fans of boybands” by saying you know this could eliminate like fake tickets and such… Sure Steve sure but anyway he also says of Liam, “the guy you see on camera is the exact same guy off camera”.

Harry and Olivia were seen together in London (well, a grainy ass video of their backs was seen anyway), walking, with some people who look to be her parents and Harry’s PA (so romantic! Not at all work related!) I was initially skeptical of the claim that it was her parents since this fandom is obsessed with saying everyone is so and so’s parents (we’ll NEVER top the time the fandom was sure Harry was seen having lunch with Eleanor’s father though) but it actually seems like maybe it was. More for Harry to add to his collection, that man truly loves an extended family! I mean the whole thing is sketchy as hell, from the assurance that that’s DEFINITELY actually Olivia in the grainy video, FOR SURE, to the confirmation that that’s her mom with them which came when a blank insta page produced a random old picture of her mom in the same skirt, but like is it them, sure I imagine so, and people making sure we get the story anytime they’re together isn’t exactly new. In other news, Dave Meyers, director of the Adore You music video, says he originally pitched the Eroda story idea (“I have this idea, of you love- liking a fish”) to Katy Perry and the Black Eyed Peas, ASJKJASKL CAN YOU IMAGINE?

#Liam payne #holivia #harry styles #niall horan #louis tomlinson #2 jun 21 #the day we learned Liam fought a cop #HAPPY PRIDE INDEED #conor butler #liam has ALWAYS just spoken to louis yesterday but I totally belive him look at them doing all the same stuff #new artist showcase! this is totally them talking about this stuff #and he's totally the one that got Louis on the NFT thing #that's cute you guys now write some songs together again why don't you #I guess Harry could be tie for least likely to fight a cop #but like he wouldn't be out there talking about how great cops are which Liam definitely would #Liam is of course Most likely to be wasted enough for something like that to happen anyway #which I assume is what was the case

[daydreamrry]

so did the sun article mention her or not? i saw someone say whenever it’s a n article from his team it never mentions her, unlike from her team. //

I was the anon that wrote that and I didn’t notice it at the bottom lol but I’m also not convinced Harry’s team approved that part. Back to the SEO post another anon linked to… what if the Sun added that part in just to boost their own SEO ranking. Editors can change pieces so I bet the Sun added that in. PR doesn’t completely control what is written they just heavily persuade and guide the piece. (I work in PR)

Here’s a prime example what I meant tho. This is an example of something Harry’s team sent in:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.capitalfm.com/news/harry-styles-nick-kroll-dont-worry-darling-gifts/

Notice how it was posted in March of this year but no mention of Holivia just Olivia as director briefly? This publication posts super positively about Harry in general and has done a lot of articles detracting from Holivia. Everyone wants to hate on his team, but hear me out on this theory.

I think his team has been actually working really hard to keep Harry’s brand as disassociated from her as possible while the stunt continues. That’s part of all the winning of awards (not to say he didn’t earn them but a lot of awards are political, esp. Grammys) and why Liam and Ed keeping bringing him up, that’s why Lorde talked about him, and Joshua whoever Olivia Rodrigos ex, and why Jen Aniston wore the same suit as him for People, why Courtney Cox covered his song. Yes all these people get clout from his name but think about how many random people have been talking about him lately??? Why?? Image restoration. All of these people have done nothing but say amazing and positive things about him. PR people talk a lot and it’s not a stretch that they’d be involved somehow in all these random positive mentions. It’s their job to find these connections and positively promote their clients. Why do they care so much about his image?? HS3 baby!! Harry wants to be and his team wants to market him as one of the greats of his time (Grammys, high profile articles with RS and famous music journalists, placement on 500 best albums and 500 best songs?) More than anything Harry wants critical acclaim for his music. They do not want it cheapened by being tied to Olivia. The article today proved it to me. They laid out that he wrote it before her and they will continue to say that and steer album marketing as far from as they can strategically. Think about it. How much press has Olivia gotten not tied to Holivia and how much press has Harry gotten not tied to Holivia? Exactly!

Theory continued: I also think his team reads these blogs and they know that we all think it’s PR. I think maybe they are the ones leaving some of the “it’s PR” comments on the DM and other Holivia articles not the GP. (Go look up what they did for Eroda and all the fake Twitter accounts they made for that marketing push) If everyone thinks the relationship is fake even if stories say otherwise, this angle is better because he didn’t really break up a family/date her anyway. Olivia still gets name recognition and tabloids get clicks. That’s why I think we see Harry being so over it. At first his team wanted to sell the it’s real thing to water down the home wrecker narrative they’ve worked so hard to clear (why he wasn’t looking horribly miserable although still strange in the January photos) but they noticed we weren’t buying it. Now they’re purposely seeding doubt and straight up disconnecting him publicly from her as much as possible. They’re the ones that fed that Page 6 article about him singing about his ex in front of her. They’re trying to make her look bad guys! Why? It’s better for Harry that we’re thinking poor Harry caught up in this stunt with such an annoying person. It’s actually sort of hilarious. And real tea I think Jason’s team is doing the same thing so I doubt there’s any real bad blood between Jason and Harry bts or any of their shared friends. That’s why the subtle shade with the kids and Jason before the Emmys and the classic doodle line. Like damn. She’s probably on the phone so much talking to her PR team about how to salvage any of this and it sells her girlboss image. He’ll still make fun of the situation on SNL but I bet Olivia comes out looking the worst. The only confusing part is Jeff? Why would he hype Olivia on the teaser Instagram story hmm? Why not Harry? Well he’s not gonna tag them both in the post and honestly I think they’re trying to distance Harry from the movie some too bc it’s tainted by her and the stunt. I’ll stand by Harry’s core team who’ve been around being loyal to him. I think tommy is dancing with Olivia like that bc he knows fans will capture it and she’ll look stupid.

I know this is a lot and sounds sort of crazy. I’m not a Larry or any of that but literally this whole thing has been so strange and this is the only explanation I can’t come up with. This is the first relationship I feel is a stunt truly without love or at least some romance involved. I don’t know what happened between them but that weird dancing video and the yacht pics really cemented it as being off for me. I don’t think Harry’s innocent or any of that either. I know he has flaws but I can’t for the life of me wrap my head around why someone who was so horribly paraded through the press with 1D would find themselves in this position again when he hasn’t had anything like this in the press for like 5 years? I know there are some pieces still missing like why did this all start in the first place?? I don’t think Harry would willingly tarnish his image even for a movie role. I don’t believe they were even seeding Holivia back then. I think they had him photographed with Flo stating they were just friends and the article about him being single to get ahead of any costar romance narratives. This was supposed to be a serious project for him. Something else happened that sent us all careening down this path to Holivia hell and it probably involves betrayal of some sort which is why he made that weird statement “thanks to everyone who has my back” at the brits. I’m convinced that DWD was supposed to be a movie to show he has acting range and that’s why he took the role, but it’s become some weird death trap.

link

#holivia #holivia stunt #fauxlivia #theories

[seijoh-apologist]

stupidly in like with you | miya atsumu

pairing: post-timeskip!miya atsumu x f!reader word count: 14.6k (OOPS LMFAO) genre: friends to lovers, fluff, hurt(?)/comfort, and like a few too many pages of fluffy smut -- third person pov for the most part. NSFW. synopsis: Atsumu and Y/N are good friends, maybe feelings are involved but Y/N isn’t his type. OR Y/N and Atsumu are most definitely in like with each other but for whatever reason aren’t dating.

A/N: hi so this is my first “published” hq fic but like here is this thought that I had and haven’t been able to get it out of my head. it’s mostly edited thanks to my irl friend but bare with my run on sentences and (slightly excessive) use of profanity. any feedback would be appreciated b/c I have more thoughts for other characters and I'd love to share haha. 

To say Y/N was annoyed was an understatement.

Aching feet begged for relief, the sweat-soaked shirt, though cute, had begun to cling to that one fold in her side that made her the slightest bit hyper aware of the “stress weight” she swears she's put on during the holiday season. And the music was absolute shit, shuffling between mash-ups of the Top 100 trending songs and some weird EDM-Indie music that she would pay good money to never hear again.

To put it plainly, she was not in the mood to be out of her home, much less celebrate. But she had agreed to come out, never being able to say no to Sakusa, who silently pleaded with his eyes to take on “babysitting” responsibilities of his teammates for tonight. He had paid for her dinner several times before tonight, claiming that she should save her money - “you should spend your money on getting a better mattress, so we don’t have to hear you complain about it anymore.” - the least she could do was give him a night to himself, away from the chaos that was the rest of the MSBY team.

Besides, it's not like she was asked to stalk them or anything - they were friends after all, so really it was just like she was tagging along for a night of club hopping, taking shots that she didn’t have to pay for, and simply people watching in between trips to the dancefloor. And normally, she’d be enjoying the night - it's just that of all nights to come out and celebrate, it had to be at the end of one of the most stress-inducing, aggravating weeks of her young adult life.

Checking that it was well after one in the morning, she sipped water from her straw, swivelling to face the crowd from her (stolen) seat at the bar, in hopes of catching the attention of someone in her party that could get the hint that they should probably get ready to go. What she did not expect to find, however, was Atsumu, flitting his eyes away from her figure as he leaned down to talk to a pair of girls. It could just be a friendly gesture, asking him if he was who they think he was and him responding but it sent a less than pleasant feeling in her stomach, so she swiveled back, reaching for her phone in the back pocket of her suddenly too tight pants.

“Fuck me,” she huffs out upon seeing that her phone battery has fallen to thirty percent, which would be just delightful when it would be time to call the ubers home. She could now rule out aimlessly scrolling through Twitter for the rest of the night while waiting for her friends.

“Uh.. maybe slip in a ‘please’ and I’m yours.”

Y/N’s eyes all but bugged out her head at the response that came from her left. The voice belongs to a guy, a very cute guy. The kind of cute guy that you see on Instagram explore page before it refreshes so the chances of seeing him again are nonexistent.She sputters out a delayed apology, double-time since she realized that she’s now taken a little too long to respond to him, to which he laughs and shakes his head.

“Don’t worry about it. I should be apologizing for interrupting you, it's just.... You looked a little lonely over here. Mind if I sit with you?”

“Seat’s all yours... but you’re on your own if those people from before come back to reclaim them.” She hums, sliding her phone back into her pocket and shifting her legs slightly in the direction of his seat.

“Scared of a little fight?” He hums, arching a brow before taking a swig of his beer. He has nice hands. Y/N muses to herself as she watches the stranger’s fingers flex slightly around the neck of his beer bottle. She’s always of the mind that a person’s hands say a lot about them.

“Mmm no… just too tired to defend myself, much less a random stranger.” He laughs at that, nodding his head before replying that “most pretty girls don’t openly say they can fight.”

“Oh you’re cheesy, aren’t you? Nobody straight up tells a girl they’re pretty for no real reason.”

“Actually,” Shifting his beer bottle onto the bar, he holds out his hand to her. “My name is not cheesy, it’s -”

“Y/N! There you are!”

The call of her name makes her jump slightly, before she feels the familiar warmth of a hand on her back. The same hand worms its way to her hip, fingers slipping into that soft fold just above her pants, the warmth of his next words being felt just above her ear.  “Where the hell’ve ya been? Was lookin’ all over the place for ya, Bo and Shoyo were worried ya left without us!”

“Been right here, idiot. We lost our original seats so I’d figure you’d come to the bar at some point and I could’ve waved you down.” She shifts slightly, turning her shoulder back towards the cute stranger with an apologetic look in her eye, to which he smiles and opens his mouth to respond until Atsumu cuts him off again, his hand gripping the back of her neck to make her give him her total attention.

“Right well I’m starving - let's get outta here. Kinda craving your infamous drunk noodles, or maybe a McDonald’s on the way home, yeah?”

Y/N nods slightly, turning back towards the stranger to see that he’s already slinking back into the crowd. Once she fully loses him, she shoves her elbow into the blonde’s side, telling him to “shut it” when he throws out a huff of pain.

“Thank you, ‘Tsumu… could’ve had a different ride home but nooooo.. Needed to come in here with all your glory talking about you being starving despite the fact that you can afford a personal chef.” She huffs out and slides off her stool, but he’s not listening. Instead he’s holding her by the shoulders and pushing her through the crowd, excusing the two of them as she continues to rant and rave at him. Once outside, the pair are joined with the rest of the party, who have called a few separate ubers home. “And to top it off, I know you’re not even listening right now - you never listen to me, Miya. I don’t know how your teammates put up with you… how do you put up with this shit, hmm?”

The group of teammates laugh softly and shake their heads, giving answers that “they get paid” to put up with him, and that Miya Atsumu is actually “a decent friend,” a fact that she knows is true but chooses to ignore when convenient for her. Atsumu just shakes his head with a roll of his eyes, pulling her into the direction of their uber for their journey back to his place. She greets the driver and settles into her seat, as Atsumu calls out behind him something or other to someone. The slam of the door and clicking of seatbelts is what fills the silence in the car, music softly playing from the rear speakers, as Atsumu leans his head back against the headrest.

“So I take it yer coming to stay with me for tonight?”

“Hmm.. don’t have much of a choice now, do I?” She teases to which Atsumu slightly pouts, reaching to knuckle at his eyes that suddenly feel a little too heavy. “You owe me the biggest breakfast fathomable tomorrow.”

“Why’s it that I owe you when I paid for your dinner before going out, paid for your drinks tonight, and am letting you sleep in my bed - which is infinitely better than your cheap ass - hey!” He begins his ranting, which would be cut off by a sturdy flick to the forehead and a slight “hush” before he feels her head rest up on his shoulder.

Y/N and Atsumu had been friends for a little while, when she chased him down the middle of the road, claiming to the public that he was a thief, just because he’d grabbed the wrong umbrella on the way out of the restaurant they were both eating in. He’d tried to apologize, but she traded umbrellas and walked back towards the direction of the restaurant. He had chalked it up to nothing really, just a slight mistake and minor inconvenience for the girl. At least until a certain teammate’s birthday dinner, where said stranger was- only this time sitting and chatting with Sakusa Kiyoomi as if they’d been best friends for forever (which in all fairness, Y/N and Kiyoomi had only been friends since college, where they were forced into a friendship by their roommates, who were hooking up with each other and forced the two on double dates). This second meeting was a sign to Atsumu, a sign that for whatever reason this girl was supposed to be in his life, in some capacity or another - but he did royally fuck it up a second time by trying to flirt with Y/N, who laughed and asked if his opening line was really the best he’d had, before hitting him with an opening line that still makes him flush when he thinks about it today.

The ride to Atsumu’s home isn’t long, but it's long enough for the tiredness to seep into Y/N’s bones, who barely misses the quiet way that Atsumu’s fingers have taken home at the base of her neck, massaging gently at the tenseness he feels under the pads of his fingers.

“Someone’s tired… why didn’t you stay home?” He asks as they turn onto his street, letting his fingers fall away from her as he begins to check that they have everything they need. ”’t’s a good thing yer sleeping over at mine... and no couch for you. Your neck is all kinds of tense. It's a miracle you haven’t complained ‘bout it once tonight.”

“Shh.. you’re so loud for what?” She mumbles while trying to stifle a yawn. “So if I’m not supposed to sleep on the couch then where am I supposed to sleep then, boy genius? The floor?”

“No,” Atsumu answers seriously, brow slightly wrinkled as he reaches for his keys in his pocket. “You’ll sleep with me. In my bed. ‘t’s a cooling mattress so you won’t haffta complain that yer too hot.”

“Miya, last time I slept in a bed with you, you nearly suffocated me. Dunno if I really wanna have to deal with trying to roll you onto your back again.”

“Wait a minute! To be fair, my bed was smaller then so there was less room for the both of us.” He begins, opening the door and shutting it before turning the two of them towards the entrance to his apartment building. “Second of all, it was my first time sharing a bed with someone other than ‘Samu so ya shouldn’t blame me for not having proper sleep manners.”

The first steps into Atsumu’s home consists of the pair kicking off their shoes, debating lightly on who was gonna take over the shower first. Y/N slides her feet into the slippers that are specifically her slippers in his home and slinks off towards the kitchen, as Atsumu peels off his shirt and heads towards the shower. It feels comfortable, almost like a routine, as Y/N gathers eggs and two noodle packets to make them a small meal before bed. Moments later, Atsumu is coming out of the shower, towelling off his hair before settling onto the sofa, clicking on the T.V. as Y/N comes in with the two bowls of noodles. A silent agreement is met when they finish that Atsumu would wash the dishes as Y/N showered, taking a shirt from his drawers to sleep in

She hands him a bottle of aspirin, mumbling around the toothbrush to “take two or so help me.” Moments later she joins him in bed, slipping on a pair of socks that are two sizes too big for her before settling under the plush fabric of his comforter. He shifts over closer to her after tossing his phone on the nightstand, seeking out her form in the now dim room for a small cuddle before dozing off. She willingly accepts him too, sliding her body just under his and buries her face in his skin, still warm from the too-hot shower he is prone to taking in the name of muscle relaxation. He hums slightly as their feet tangle together, silently appreciating the way Y/N so freely indulges his need to touch someone after being touch-starved for so long.

Though Y/N isn’t much like him in that sense - doesn’t have this inherent need to cling to someone before bed, or just hold hands at a store, or hands on the shoulder in a crowded room. Sometimes she will, like now with her nose buried in his neck and her hand rubbing up and down the length of his sturdy back. Normally they won’t do this, both just a little too headstrong to dig into the tightening in their chests when the hug for a moment longer than usual; but tonight Y/N is silently congratulating him on winning the game that has had him stressed for weeks. She feels his lips press softly to the top of her head, a mumble of “good night” leaving his lips as she feels his breaths even out as the moments pass.

This is where Y/N wishes she had the power to pull away - blames moments like this on giving her the slightest bit of hope that they could be more than friends.

It's not that she hadn’t thought about it - frankly she’d spent too much time thinking about it. She could do this… with him.. But every thought is put to bed when she thinks back on this one conversation months ago. Granted she didn’t have the full context of the conversation but it's enough to make her heart squeeze when she sees Atsumu flirt with someone, or shake off his hand when she’s had a particularly sensitive day.

It was just another evening where hanging out after him and the rest of the team being away for a week. They’d ordered in food and drinks had been flowing nicely as the comfortable pair had caught up - it was honestly too homey of a setting in hindsight. His phone rang, the white text of “‘Samu” flashed and Y/N took that as a cue to finally get to the restroom.

“Mhm.. made it back early today - no Y/N picked me up.” He’d been mumbling around a handful of chips, the other side of the conversation mute to Y/N’s eavesdropping.. “Oh shut up, she doesn’t mind and it's not as if we’re dating anyway. It’s.. casual and it works for us.”

And she should’ve stepped into her place next to him, cuddled up into her chest and played the role of the blissfully ignorant idiot. But no, she stayed tucked behind the restroom door, blood pumping and heart beating too loud in her ears. It would seem as though Y/N was a glutton for punishment, a minor thing when thinking about putting herself through a moment of pain for a lifetime of pleasure - but the pain that came with Miya Atsumu’s next words would set her off kilter for a while.

“Besides, she’s not really my type. It’d never work out anyway.”

She had no choice really other than to shut the door. Take some extra time in the restroom than necessary - after all she’d just hear the potential love of her life admit to his twin brother that she wasn’t his type. All she could do really was stare at herself in the stupidly bright mirror in his stupid guest bathroom of his stupidly expensive apartment.  God this is so stupid, she thinks to herself while running cold water to press against her cheeks that she feels are heated up. Before she can really tear her own heart to bits though, she hears a quick rapt on the door.

“Y/N ya’right in there? Warned y’bout putting too much hot sauce on your food.”

But that’d been two years ago. It was a little rough after that; Y/N had thrown herself into finding a life post-grad which was a great distraction from the rumors going around that Atsumu had been spotted with some model or actress or something. Besides, Y/N wasn’t really the type to harp on failed romantic interests - all she’d need to do is download whatever relevant dating app for some validation and she’d be able to move on. However nights like tonight, when he looked too good and the little moment was a little too right - she’d still hope. Make a wish to whatever angle number or shooting star or deity above that she’d get tossed a chance to be in love with the stupid setter, because she had already fallen.

“Mm y’right?” She heard him, how could she not when he’s practically suffocating her. She chooses not to answer though, humming affirmatively - to which he huffs and shifts slightly, settling back into unconsciousness.

Maybe she’d blame the train of thoughts for tonight on the fact that she’d been drinking. However, come morning, the seed would bloom a little brighter in her chest when she wakes up to realize that her face is pressed into his side, arms circling his slim waist and one sock lost among their tangled legs.

---

God she hated him. Miya Atsumu was too much of a lot of things - too much of a sore winner, too much of an idiot, too much of a talker, and most of all, too much of a liar.

For the second time in the span of a month, Atsumu had convinced her to come out, despite her desperately wanting to curl up in bed and binge eat away the stress of the week. Only this time it was a charity event, so she would definitely be the bad guy if she said no. It was an event where him and the rest of his team had been roped into a charity dinner - which (gratefully) meant that Sakusa would be around, and they could fuck off to a corner someplace to talk shit about what all the rich wives are wearing and how bad it looks when their husbands are flirting with the wait staff. But Atsumu had promised that they’d leave before the entree was served - swore the entire drive over that “we’ll get you back home in time, grandma” and that he’d even cook for her this time.

But the entree had been whisked off about forty minutes ago, her wine glass had been refilled twice, and she was bored of watching Sakusa look at his watch, waiting for an appropriate time to leave. Atsumu was a few tables away, chatting up some couple, something about wanting to get their information for Osamu’s business. He would laugh a little too loudly at their jokes, gaining attention of those at surrounding tables - which was only mildly irritating as he had now gathered a crowd of people around him, spewing off some story about him getting lost in Russia the first time they played overseas.

She huffs and stands up, chair scraping slightly, gaining the attention of the rest of the  table. All she does is hold up her wine glass in a feeble attempt at an answer of where she’d be waiting at the bar. If I have to be here, the least I could do is drink for free. The bar is empty, surprisingly no one wants to mope around this very nice dinner.

“What can I get you?”

“Mmm.. whiskey highball, please.” She answers to the unnecessarily cute bartender, but the raise of his eyebrows do not go unnoticed.  And fortunately (or unfortunately) she’s got the time to press him. “Surprised?”

“Only a little bit. Noticed you were drinking wine most of the night so the whiskey is a hard switch.”

“So you’ve been watching me?” She muses, smiling as he places the drink in front of her. He smiles and leans forward on the bar slightly, shaking his head and replying.

“It’s almost as if… I’m being paid to make sure people have their drinks.”

“Oh, so it's not because I’m cute?”

“Now I didn’t say that did I? But you know you’re gorgeous; your boyfriend over there must tell you all the time.” He muses, a smirk playing at his lips as he nods behind her. She all but chokes on her drink when she turns around and sees that the direction he nodded in was directly in Atsumu’s vicinity before shaking her head violently. Atsumu was not going to ruin this for her. “Oh so not your boyfriend?”

“Nope.” She says, popping the ‘p’ as she slips the straw past her lips again, eyes taking in his leaning form. He was cute. His hair was on the silver side of blond, tips of his hair black. He was tall and lean, a piercing hanging from his left ear.

“That’s a shame.” And she gives him her name with a flutter of her lashes and a sweet smile. He returns it, preparing her next drink without her even having to ask. And so they talk, first about how the next person who approaches the bar should be cut off, to how pretentious the whole event was. Two drinks in, Y/N finds herself being invited to a show.

“This whole bartending thing is just a way for me to get some extra cash… I’ve got a gig in an hour. I figured if we leave together now, I can get you home to change outta this and into something a little more… concert fitting?”

“O-Oh.. yeah. I just need to go let my friend know…” She trails off, sliding off her barstool before turning to gracefully power walking to her initial seat next to Sakusa. She huffs and she plots herself down in the char next to him, to which he gives her a look of what the fuck. “I don’t have time to catch you up, but the insanely hot bartender is taking me home. As much as I’d love to get out of here with you, I desperately need to get lai-”

“Going somewhere?” Fuck fuck fuck.

“Didn’t you hear her? The hot bartender is taking her home and she needs -”

“Aishhhh shut up.” She turns to look at her curly haired friend, only to see that he’s got this annoying little smile on his face. She deeply exhales and turns back to Atsumu, who looks less than amused about what his friend said. “Listen, you promised me we’d leave two hours ago. Well you lied so nooow I made plans, so if you would kindly move outta my way.”

“No.” She whips her head up at the blonde. No? What the absolute fuck was he going on about telling her no, despite her not asking for his permission. “You’ve been drinking and you don’t even know the guy - how can you trust that he won’t memorize your address then come rob you or something? I promised to take you home, and since you’re ready now we can leave now.”

“Listen Miya, I appreciate the concern but really I’m a big girl. I can handle a night out by myself with a guy - besides I’m not even that drunk. Now, give me my house keys and move out of my way.”

Suddenly, it's like those cheesy western movies where two cowboys are staring each other down, neither willing to be put down by the other. Except it's this 6’2” pro-athlete staring quite literally down at Y/N, who hits the gym only on a blue moon and spends too much time sitting at a desk. Sakusa has to laugh at the two stubborn idiots in front of him; he knows that Atsumu is going to be able to win this little game that they're playing, but silently applauds Y/N for attempting to stick it to him. Moments pass before Atsumu finally sighs, shoving his hands in the pockets of his expensive suit and pulling out her keys - but he doesn’t give them to her.

“What’s his name? If you can tell me his name I’ll give you your keys and let you go.”

“Let me go? Okay, Dad.” She huffs, crossing her arms over her chest, small clutch dangling from her wrist. “I know his name, Atsumu. I may have had a drink or two but I’m not an idiot to be going off with someone who’s name I don’t even know... it’s… uhm.” And she’s done. She hadn’t even bothered to ask his name, doesn’t even remember whether she gave him hers, nor was she smart enough to notice whether he’d been wearing a name tag.  Mentally she’s cursing herself, chancing a glance behind Atsumu’s shoulder to see the hot bartender chatting it up with another girl. Before she can think too much into it, Atsumu sighs deeply, grabbing his suit jacket off the chair next to her and slipping it on his shoulders, a soft “let’s go” leaving his lips as he nods his good-bye to the rest of the table. Y/N chews at the inside of her cheek before grabbing his arm.

“Give me my keys. I’m not going home with you. I want to be alone.”

---

Four days passed - four days of Atsumu borderline harassing Y/N with apologies. Promising to make it up to her. Which is how she finds herself walking into their favorite local sushi restaurant - it's the only one that has self-serving sushi that arrives on a miniature train, and it's also the only place that they go when apologies are to be exchanged. In the handful of years that they’d be friends, Y/N has needed to apologize to Atsumu thrice - two for blowing him off after overhearing the dreaded words and once for saying that maybe Osamu was the better twin. Atsumu on the other hand, had apologized to Y/N many times - so many times in fact that Y/N is sure that he makes up excuses just so they can come eat at this sushi place.

It’s been a long week for Y/N. The Sunday after the charity event, Y/N wakes up with one of the worst headaches of her life - and its due to the fact that she slept like shit hoping that Atsumu made it home safe since he hadn’t texted her he did. Monday she was handed a stack of documents at work that needed to get done before lunch (which didn’t get done). Tuesday morning was dominated by the fact that some idiot on the train to work had spilt a coffee on her, making her wear the most uncomfortable suit jacket, lest she wear a coffee soaked shirt for most of the day. Today, Wednesday, she’d woken up to a box with a pastry outside her door and a cup of coffee with a sticky note on the lid.

Sorry. Let me make it up to you. Train Sushi? 7pm?

Despite the fact that she was most definitely still thinking about why Atsumu acted the way he did - she still went through the mountain of paperwork on her desk with a little smile, knowing that she’d be getting free sushi and an apology. Maybe if she’s lucky, she can convince him that she needs a crepe on the way home.

As she makes her way into the restaurant that evening, she sees him. His dorito-shaped body is stationed at the bar, a cozy brown coat hugging his back, muscles of his arms being squeezed by the sleeves. She can see that he’s got a drink in front of him and she smiles slightly, stepping up towards the bar but stops momentarily. He’s talking to someone - not just someone, a girl. He’s smiling too. Y/N can’t see the stranger’s face, but judging by the way that she has a hand around his biceps and her head tilted, one can only assume that they know each other. Y/N attempts to step backwards, she wants to let him finish his conversation with the woman but she doesn’t know if she can stomach the idea of watching them flirt; but she misses the step, leading her to bump into the hostess who led her to the bar, creating a bit of a scene.

“Y/N! There you are! C’mere.”

She’s buying time by profusely apologizing to the hostess, who honestly is probably just trying to get away. At this point, Y/N has no choice but to walk towards her friend and this mystery woman. The ten steps towards the pair is enough time for Y/N to mentally list off all the things she could have done in the world to warrant some shitty karma that’s hitting her now. Once face to face with Atsumu, she smiles.

“Sorry - long day at work got me all …” Y/N’s words trail off, the hand that’s not death-gripping her purse waves off with her closing thoughts.

“Don’t mind, Wednesday’s are usually your long days. ‘Sides you’re here now - tha’s what matters.” God he’s so dumb. So handsome and so dumb, and god did she miss him. “It’s a good thing you got here a little late, this is Michimiya Yui. I think you two might’ve -”

“No, I don’t think we’ve met! It’s so nice to meet you - he used to talk about you all the time!” The brunette smiles at Y/N, sticking her hand out, which Y/N takes limply, shaking her hand. She’s pretty, Y/N thinks to herself. Her hair is short and she’s wearing some cute leather thigh high boots, her smile is almost paid-for perfect. She’s got this whole brown smoked out eyeliner working for her, which makes Y/N slightly subconscious about her most likely smudged and uneven eyeliner and less-than appealing work pants. Before Y/N can even think of a response to give, Michimiya has her hand back on Atsumu, a pretty smile settling on her lips. It feels like Y/N is watching a trainwreck happening before her eyes. “I was just telling Atsumu that I was back in town and that we should hang out!”

“And I was just explaining to her that I had plans with yo-”

“You should join us!” Idiot. Why am I such a fucking idiot? Atsumu looks over at Y/N with a wild look in his eyes, Michimiya looks like a child who wound up making out with two candies instead of one. “I had a super long day at work today so I’m really only able to eat dinner, but I know Atsumu can stay up for hours so once I leave you two can hang out.”

“Y/N, I thought that -”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea! I just need to tell the wait staff to cancel my to-go order, so excuse me.”

And so the two friends watch the woman walk away from them, making her way towards the to-go order area. Y/N bites at the inside of her cheek, intentionally avoiding Atsumu’s eyes that she feels are pinned on her. She digs out her phone from her purse, texting Sakusa an ominous “next time you see me, please poison me 😑.” As Y/N drags her eyes up Atsumu’s front, she feels the same way she did when she would get scolded by her parents. His eyes are staring at her face, no doubt wanting to press her about why she willingly invited a stranger to eat with them at their restaurant. To pacify him, all she does is hold up her hand, shaking her head.

“It’s fine, Miya. Like you said, Wednesday’s are my long days so I wouldn’t be able to stay out late with you anyway. Besides…” She starts, fixing a smile onto her face. “I think that she might have a little crush on you!” He says nothing, lips pressed in a hard line and a brow arched up at her. “Don’t look at me like that. And save your apology for next time… we have company.”

The rest of the evening goes exactly like Y/N’s worst nightmare. She is quite literally the third-wheel despite the fact that technically Michimiya was supposed to be the third wheel in this little scenario. Y/N has to watch the pretty brunette flirt relentlessly with Atsumu, who seems blissfully oblivious to the fact that for every compliment Michimiya gives Y/N, she gives herself two more. Sakusa is well informed on the situation, receiving texts every five minutes with another dumb thing that was said in front of Y/N’s appatizers. Rarely does someone ever wish for a natural disaster to hit, but in the last thirty minutes of sitting at this table, Y/N has wished for every biblical curse to wreak havoc in her way.

Despite the fact that Michimiya has hijacked every conversation, Atsumu still tries to ask Y/N about her, including her in the conversation as much as possible. But Y/N stopped trying twenty minutes ago, and is now forcing herself to eat the last few pieces of sushi she ordered - normally she’s a stress eater, but Michimiya has rested her hand on Atsumu’s thigh and Y/N has suddenly never felt more sick in her life. Y/N has never once picked up a tab around Atsumu - “please, ‘ve got more money than I know whatta do wit’it” he’d always tell her when she attempted to take up the ticket - but when they finally wave down someone and ask for the check, Y/N drops some cash on the table and collects her things.

“It’s been so nice to meet you, but I think I should really get going. I’ve gotta get to work early tomorrow - I’ll see you this weekend right, Miya?”

“Wait up, I’ll take you home… Yui it’s been really -”

“No no, really it's okay! You stay! I’ll just text you when I get home. Be safe. And again it was so nice to meet you - take care of Atsumu for me.”

“Oh I will!”

Y/N is not a runner but she’s never sprinted away from a situation so fast in her life. The image of Michimiya’s sly little smile at Y/N’s request to take care of her friend makes her feel gross, tears stinging at the back of her eyes and she settles on the train. Y/N can name a handful of times when she’d seen Atsumu around women - but never once had she’d met someone he was romantically involved with and it hurts. The gentle sway of the train does nothing to settle the spinning of her head with images of what Atsumu actually looks for - his actual type. She feels like an idiot; she should have just told Atsumu that they could do a raincheck, or if she was feeling bold, she could’ve told Michimiya to fuck off. The latter seems possible in the version of herself in Y/N’s head, but the reality was that she was too nice. Always wanted to make the people she cares about happy, and Atsumu looked... happy? Besides, Y/N thinks to herself as she exits the train and makes the trek towards her apartment building, if Michimiya Yui was going to be involved with Atsumu, the more exposure she had to her, the better off Y/N would be in accepting that Atsumu would never ever be with Y/N like that.

Once settled in her apartment, she sends off a quick “home. thanks for tonight!” to Atsumu before making her way to the bathroom. A nice warm soak would surely make her feel better, make her forget about what an idiot she is and maybe, just maybe, make her body relax all the love she holds in her heart for the blond away. Her phone pings, twice, but she ignores it. Ten minutes into her pity soak she hears a bang on her door, which only makes her groan and dunk her head under the water. The banging stops, making Y/N think it was just her neighbor or something asking for a favor. What she doesn’t expect is for her to exit the bath twenty minutes later to see Sakusa Kiyoomi sittin on her couch.

“Hello, glad to see you exploiting your spare key access.”

“Miya called me and said you looked like shit earlier. And judging by your texts throughout the evening, I figured you were on the brink of a breakdown.”

And so she was. She spent the rest of the evening talking Kiyoomi through the night, slipping in all the questions she’s had from the past two times that Atsumu had cockblocked her. And bless Kiyoomi for sitting through her tears, sitting cross-legged and drinking tea that he had initially made for her but refused to let her drink once he realized she had already brushed her teeth. It felt almost like she was finally thinking about what her friendship with Miya Atsumu was, what it could and couldn’t be. Every moment painted so clearly about how Y/N felt for her blond friend, but the only thing missing was how said friend felt about her. At 11:30 pm, two hours after Kiyoomi initially arrived at Y/N’s apartment, she pushed Kiyoomi out the door, eyes puffy but heart and head a little clearer than how they were when he arrived.

Despite promising Kiyoomi that she would not think about Atsumu, as Y/N settles into bed, her thoughts can’t help but wonder what it would be like to be with him. She mulls it over as she slides off her socks, deciding that it’d be nice - probably exactly how they are now, plus a title and a little less swatting his hands away when he reaches for her in public. Y/N can’t help it as she thinks about whether they would kiss a lot - they’ve kissed before, neither strangers to cheek kisses as greetings or kisses at the top of their heads when the other is crying into their chest (there was even that very drunk kiss they shared on New Years Eve when their friendship was fresh that both still have warm cheeks about when they think about). Just as she’s about to go down the path of whether Atsumu would spend more nights with her at her cardboard box of an apartment or her at his, Y/N cuts herself off - after all she wasn’t his type. Tonight proved that more than anything, she thinks.

It’s not like Atsumu has never brought anyone around Y/N - there’d been a few that she’d met, though they were mostly over a facetime call and it was mostly just her waving at them before Atsumu ducked away to have a private conversation. It's not like tonight was the first night Y/N had to swallow the bile in her mouth at seeing someone make heart eyes at Atsumu - it's just this time felt different; almost like Y/N was finally having the truth thrusted into her face. But Y/N isn’t mad or hateful of Michimiya, nor Atsumu for that matter - she’d never been the type to hate a girl for having feelings for the person she has feelings for. It’s annoying, sure, but Y/N doesn’t see the point in hating someone for how they feel - however, Y/N does not make the effort to become friends with these girls, or maintain the close friendship with Atsumu for that matter. Is it petty to put a strain on a friendship out of fear of losing said friendship? Absolutely! But Y/N knows she won’t be able to stomach another night like tonight - another night of seeing Atsumu slip so easily from her fingers into the arms of another. And as observant as Atsumu is, he never fully recognizes that Y/N is avoiding him, at least that what she hopes since more often than he’s able to worm himself back into her life.

---

Following the failed apology dinner, Y/N tried her hardest to give herself a few days without the blonde- made easy by the fact that the weekend after the failed apology dinner he’d be out of town for another tournament. It’s not like she was totally avoiding him, she’d responded to his texts and even answered two of his six facetime calls while he was away, she just wanted a little bit of time to wallow in self pity in her apartment, crying over her comfort movies and eating too many bags of hot chips. But once he was back in the same timezone as her, Atsumu made it impossible for Y/N to fully wallow.

It started when he texted her about their favorite crepe place temporarily closing for some reason or other - he’d tried to convince her to ditch work early that day to come, but Y/N declined with a simple text of “i like my job tyvm.” So what did he do? Pick her up in his flashy sports car that day after work (two hours later than usual since she’d figured he’d do something ridiculous like this) and drove her there, where he didn’t bat an eyelash as she ordered double than what she normally would have (a silent fuck you from Y/N but it didn’t matter since she wasn’t actualy hurting his wallet). She’d been able to tide him off for a few days, as she escaped to her hometown for a weekend - but that did little to stop the mirage of texts he’d sent her, describing in great detail this cool hybrid bookstore-game cafe that he found and thinks she’d like. Instead of responding how she actually wanted, she’d just replied with a half-assed “ahh exciting- sounds cute!” (She mentally grants herself ten nice points for erasing her initially text, telling him to take his “fucking girlfriend”). This must have really struck a nerve with him when the following weekend, he’d dragged her out of bed on Sunday morning to take her to said bookstore-game cafe, even spoiling her by secretly buying a book she’d picked up but put back.

Y/N can’t tell if Atsumu is intentionally ignoring the hints she doesn’t want to see him or if he’s really just oblivious. She also can’t tell if the patter of her heart when he drags her out of bed despite her not wanting to see him is a good thing or not. It’s been weeks since she’d third-wheeled with Atsumu and Michimiya, surely Y/N should have been able to take a little bit of pride in the fact that he was literally chasing her down to spend time with her rather than Michimiya - but before she can even swallow that pill Atsumu shows up at her apartment with the trace of a bruise hiding just below his shirt collar. The small mark on his neck makes Y/N convince herself that this would be the time that she needs a full on Atsumu ban.

Said ban never actually happens, though.

Just as proof that this ban doesn’t happen, today Atsumu has decided that Y/N needs to come shopping with him. For the entire day. Cue the montage of Atsumu banging on Y/N’s door at nine in the morning, breakfast pastries and coffee in hand as Y/N answers in all her morning glory, sleep caked up in the outer corner of her eyes and pajamas haphazardly fixed. Words are exchanged as Atsumu pushes her towards the shower, promising to make up her bed and even take out the trash for her (a chore she put off last night because she’d seen too many people smoking by the dumpsters which scared her enough to make her drag up the two bags of back up the five flights of stairs). As Y/N settles at her desk to work on making herself “the hottest person at the market,” Atsumu settles on her bed, talking a mile a minute about all the things he wanted to get at the market and the possible places they could go for lunch in the area. All she can do is hum, wondering silently why he’d chosen to take the trip with her and not his girlfriend - but she wouldn’t complain.

The market was...fulfilling enough. Surprisingly, Y/N was walking towards the food trucks with more bags in her hands than Atsumu, who followed behind her with one print from a vendor that Y/N convinced him would actually look good in his home office. The pair decided that Y/N was better suited to look for a place where they could park themselves to eat, while Atsumu went off to get them lunch. Before Y/N could make a break for the tables though, Atsumu grabbed her face, thumb swiping at her cheek firmly - it took Y/N every ounce of restraint to not whimper at the unprompted affection.

“Wha-”

“Had some of that jam sample from earlier on your face, dummy.”

“Tsk… why didn’t you see it earlier.”

He just smiled softly, letting the warmth of his hand fall from her face before patting her back towards her initial direction. Frankly, she’d been thrown off her rhythm; they’d touched each other before for fucks sake. So why was this one moment of closeness enough to make her chest feel tight? As she weaved through the tables, she can’t help but hold her hand to where his was, almost as if to preserve the warmth that was now gone. She hummed gleefully as she found a table, making her way towards it and setting up camp. As she settles into her chair, fingers deftly texting to Atsumu where she’s stationed, she sees a shadow come across the table.

“Hey, are you gonna use all these chairs?” He’s cute, almost terribly cute - he’s got this pinkish-blonde hair going on top, an almost shy glint in his gray-ish colored eyes, and an almost self-assured smile pulling at his lips. He was also tall, much taller since Y/N was sitting, but she almost doesn’t mind considering the fact that she is most definitely gawking at him. She shakes her head momentarily, both as an answer to his question and a way to clear her head momentarily.

“Thanks! My friend over there is too precious to sit on the curb, apparently.” He smiles at her, eyes squinting and she’s momentarily breathless at just how cute he is when he smiles. His arms move to grab one of the chairs and that's when she decides to speak up, not wanting to quite end the conversation yet.

“Ahh no worries! I know all about having that too precious friend! I only need one other chair so you can take two of these.”

“Oh cool thanks… and hey this might be a little weird but - fuck are you from Miyagi? You look kinda like this one girl from high school but - “

“I am! I went to Aoba Johsai and -”

He clicks his tongue and seems to smile even brighter now. “That’s right - you’re Y/N right? I think you were a year younger than us right, but you always hung out with that one girl in my year who used to smoke behind the boy’s gym…” Y/N nods, a grimace on her face and the back of her neck feeling a little warm with embarrassment. How could she possibly explain that said girl was actually Y/N’s cousin and that she didn’t actually smoke, she’d just smell like it after working at their family restaurant. “Well I’m Makki, by the way. If you remember Matsukawa and Iwaizumi they're over there - they were at Seijoh too.” She nods, leaning slightly to see the two men behind him, both wearing smiles that were just a little too cheeky.

“Yeah yeah, I remember… you also had a particular whiny one with you too, right?” He laughs at that, responding that said whiny one was actually abroad. The two make a little conversation, her giving him some suggestions on places to visit since one of his trio is actually visiting for the weekend. Y/N thinks this is nice - feels like the main character in a movie with the amount of men that have approached her in the past couple weeks. Before she can get too cocky in her ability to pull though, Atsumu walks up to the table, hands full with a tray that seems to be piled with too many little plates.

“There y’are… couldn’t see you from across the way… everything okay?” Atsumu questions, standing to his full height as if sizing up Makki, who seems completely unphased by Atsumu.

“Yeah, was just asking your girlfriend if I could steal these two chairs away before I realized that we knew each other.” The strawberry blonde is definitely unphased by Atsumu, who’s shoulders visibly relax at Makki’s suggestion that the two friends were together. “Well it was nice seeing you, Y/N! Thanks again for the chairs, you all enjoy your meal.”

As Makki walks away, Atsumu settles into his own chair with a smug little smile playing at his lips. Y/N, on the other hand, is chewing at the inside of her cheek as food is placed in front of her. Her blond friend, the observant little shit, notices that she doesn’t immediately tuck into the lunch laid in front of her and nudges her foot with his, muttering a quick “what's wrong.”

“You were blessed with possibly the worst timing in the world, y’know that?”

“What d’ya mean?” He muses, taking in her huffily pulling the lid off her food and stuffing her face with the rice bowl in front of her.. She chews, combing the food on her plate with the plastic fork as a way to stop herself from unleashing all her frustrations.

“You always but in whenever I start getting hit on! Or you stop every chance I have at possibly getting to know someone; you come in here full force and its really not fair. I don’t do it to you, and it's just not fair.” Y/N hates that she probably sounds like a whining child, but she really can’t help it anymore. It’s really not fair that Atsumu flaunts his conquests on the cover of every magazine, but god forbid Y/N talk to a guy. “Its been a while since I’ve had sex, Atsumu, and it’s getting to a point where I’d jump just about anyone’s bones. I - I just think that as my best friend you should be providing me some support, not cockblocking me at every fucking opportunity you get.”

It takes every fiber in his body to not laugh at how ridiculous Y/N is being right now. He licks at his lip, catching whatever food crumbs he could before clearing his throat. “‘M sorry what? You actually wanna hook up with those guys? They seem like the type to just fuck ya n’ then not text you back.”

“And if that’s what I want then so what!? Did you miss the part where I said I’m desperate here?”

“Then..” He takes a swig at his water bottle in front of him, leaning back slightly in his seat and sliding his sunglasses to rest on the top of his head. “If you need it that badly then you can just do it with me. You said anyone so I can -”

She laughs, one that sounds on the brink of delusion. “You’re fucking ridiculous. Yeah okay… Dunno if you remember but you’ve got a girlfriend, Miya.”

“She’s not my girlfriend, Y/N. We’re… not that serious with each other and we’re also open. She knows that..'' He looks smug, and Y/N wants to smack the absolute life out of him. “And I’m being serious, darlin.. I’d rather get you off than see you get your hopes up over some random.”

Y/N squeezes the poor utensil in her hand, choosing to chomp down one of the buns on the table instead of reminding Atsumu that she wasn’t exactly his type. But she lets it go, just squinting at him and shaking her head, mumbling how ridiculous he is before swiping some of his veggies off his plate. How else is she supposed to react to her best friend blatantly telling her that he’d fuck her if she’d ask - she tries to ignore the way that their knees resting on each other under the table makes her heart soar. Before she can form a sentence, something to steer the direction away from her sex life (or lack thereof), Atsumu mumbles around a forkful of food that she’d better hurry since he wants to do another lap of the market before it closes.

---

Atsumu’s offer and that entire conversation is brought up again a few days later; the pair are in Y/N’s apartment this time. She’d asked him and his brother to come over to install some shelves for her, but apparently Osamu was busy. With the shelves installed, Y/N put on a movie to serve as Atsumu’s entertainment whilst she organized her trinkets. She wasn’t really paying attention to the movie, too concerned with trying to see if the shelves were actually level or not when she heard Atsumu laugh behind her, muting the T.V. with a quizzical brow raised.

“Huh? If you don’t like the movie then you can change it… ‘m not payin atten-”

“Oh yeah not paying attention right?” She gives him a hard look as if proving to him that she can’t honestly give him the plot of the movie. “So you’re telling me that its just a coincidence that this movie is about two friends who make a pact to fuck each other? That it's a coincidence that the literal name of the movie is ‘Friends with Benefits”

She rolls her eyes and turns to face him fully, seeing that he’s now sat up on her couch with his elbows resting on his knees. A beat passes before he puts his hands up, almost as if in surrender, before he pushes himself off the couch and towards the kitchen. She watches him as he pulls out a bottle of wine, nodding to the couch as if asking her to take a break. She relents, folding her legs under herself and pulling at a string on the worn sofa, thinking she’d probably try to replace this piece before she renewed her lease. He thrusts the glass to her, settling into the sofa but he makes no move to unmute the T.V., instead inciting some silent battle while they each sip from their respective glasses.

“Y’know you’ve been snappy lately… my offer from the other day still stands, hope y’know tha’.” She scoffs, choosing to take another swig at her wine, which does little to cool the warmth she feels in her throat. He’s not technically wrong - the conversation the other day had made a fog of tension hang over her, making a long lost desire for the blond resurface in her lower abdomen at full force. She’d spent way too much time the other night on Amazon, debating on whether it would be a good idea to get rechargeable batteries for her toy, spent too long watching his mouth move when he’d facetimed her the other night. It's not that Y/N hadn’t hooked up with anyone since knowing Atsumu, it's just that maybe she’d spent a little too much time enjoying how Atsumu met her emotional needs that she had neglected her physical needs.

“What offer?” She’ll be damned to let him in on the fact that she’d done nothing but think about his stupid offer. Refuses to let him know that she wants, no needs, to say yes. So she plays dumb, finger dancing along the lip of her cup, foot swinging anxiously against the floor.

He hums, reaching to put his glass on her beat up coffee table. He leans his elbow on the back of the couch, placing his chin in his hand, giving Y/N his undivided attention. “‘Samu was talking about how his girlfriend has been on his ass lately about every little thing and so I asked him if they’re doin’ okay, y’know physically… didn’t answer me but I figured he’d solved it if he hasn’t mentioned it since. I heard someone say that if yer girl’s acting fussy then y’need to think about if you’ve been fuckin’ her right and well…” Y/N swallows the lump in her throat, stopping the shiver that threatens to rack her body at the idea of Atsumu thinking she’s his girl. “I was bein’ serious the other day. I know ya were mad so it wasn’t the best time to bring it up, but it seemed like the only good thing to say. Besides, ‘m not all that bad in bed, can ring up a few people if y’need a review.”

Y/N doesn’t respond with anything other than a forced huff of laughter, can't respond really. It feels too warm, she’s hoping that maybe this is some fever dream instead of reality. She just plays with her cup absentmindedly, not quite able to look the blond in the eyes despite the fact that his eyes are studying her face as if she holds all the answer to the questions the universe has. Him being bad in bed is the least of her worries, what if she’s bad? God she wants to say yes, maybe she’ll say yes - maybe it’d be good for her to finally get some di-

“Forget it, ‘m sorry. If it makes you uncomfortable then we don’t have to, sweetheart. I just -”

“I’m not uncomfortable.” Oh now she speaks. He looks at her, a wild look fixed on his face, almost as if he doesn’t believe the words that came out of her mouth. “It's just..” She throws her head back, face covered momentarily by some plant leaves. God she didn’t want to actually voice her thoughts but now she has no choice.

“It’s just what? If yer worried about the fuckin part, I can just get you off other ways. Get paid to be good with my hands -”

“Just shut up for once please, you’re ruining it.” He makes a show of zipping his lips, smiling as Y/N squares herself to him, stretching her neck as if she’s preparing for a fight, rather than speaking a coherent sentence.. “It's just that I don’t… dont wanna force you into thinking you have to ‘cos I’m being bitchy to you.. Like it’s not your problem to fix y’know and I just. Besides, don't wanna be the only one enjoying it, want you to like it too and … for fucks sake this is ridiculous. I just dunno I-”

Atsumu’s hand reaches out towards her, fingers stroking her knee in a comforting manner but it’s all but comforting to Y/N, who’s entire leg feels on fire at this small moment of skinship. “Shh, shh, no baby yer not forcing me to do anything. Don’t think that way - I-I wanna do it! I wan’ya to be happy and if this makes you happy then… And i mean if y’need more of a reason then think of it as a way for me to say sorry for cockblockin’ ya all the time.”

Y/N doesn’t say yes, but she also doesn’t outright decline. She can’t think of anything other than how, if she nodded her head, he’d give her everything she’d been wanting. Atsumu and Y/N stare at each other, moments pass and she’s sure that he’s going to take her stillness and silence as a no - but he just moves to grab her wine glass, moving it from her grasp to the table, shifting closer to her in the process. She holds her breath and he brings one of his hands towards her face, palming the side of her jaw in his warm hand, thumb rubbing at the plush skin of her lips. “Can I kiss ya? Maybe tha’s all ya need is a good kiss, yeah?” She nods, his hand moving to pluck at her bottom lip between his thumb and forefinger. “Got really nice lips, don’t you? ‘S so soft and wet, catch myself wanting to touch ‘em allot’' She inhales softly as he leans in, his hand sliding to the side of her neck and he litters soft kisses against her jaw. She whines softly when his mouth nears hers. “Shh, gonna kiss you in a minit.”

All Y/N can do is breath, mouth parted slightly as Atsumu drags his mouth over her face. His hand is so warm and big on her skin; he’s so close in her face that all she can do is inhale and smell him, making her dizzy with building warmth in her belly. They catch each other’s gaze, neither daring to blink away, before he tilts his head, pressing his mouth against hers softly at first. He doesn’t move to kiss her, just holds his lips over hers for a moment, as if giving her time to back away if she wants to; but when she doesn’t, he hums and pulls her head towards his more, lips moving in tandem. His hand slides from her cheek, worming its way towards the nape of her neck as he pulls her to him - he wastes no time in deepening the kiss, licking into her mouth with  fervor. And she lets him, moving into his lap as she relishes in the feeling of his tongue lazily swirling with her own; the new found position allows him to drag his hand down her back soothingly, her own hands sliding around his neck and up into his hair.

She parts with a soft gasp, whether it be for air or out of surprise she can’t tell. He whines momentarily, before nosing his way down towards her neck, pressing butterfly-light kisses at the flesh. She’s wiggling in his arms, and he laughs, the air ticking the soft bend of her collarbone. “Fuck, you’ve been holdin out on me. Tha’ was good right? A good kiss for ya?” All Y/N can do is nod, sliding her hand towards his face in hopes of bringing his lips back to hers. She can feel the smirk on his mouth when she presses their mouths together again, and maybe after she’d bitch him out about it but right now all she wants is to be suffocated by him.

Moments pass, the air filled with soft pants in between kisses and thickening arousal. Atsumu cards his fingers in her hair gently, mouth still against hers, free hand sneaking around Y/N’s front. She whines softly, to which he shushes her softly. “Shh you’re okay… just wanna feel ya.” He soothes her over by indulging her in soft kisses against her lips,   hand pushing up the front of her ratty t-shirt, snaking his hand past the waistband of her shorts into the confines of her (now too tight) underwear. Y/N shudders when he strokes lightly over her clit, before surpassing it completely and going to where a wet spot had been developing on the fabric. Plucking the damp cotton out of the way and letting the tips of two fingers rub over her weeping hole, “Oh.. this for me?”

A small noise crawls out of her throat, a mix between a moan, a whine, and surprise. “Don’t, ‘tsumu. It’s embarrassing..”

“Shh don’t be embarrassed. Just feels good to know I make ya feel good, baby.” Atsumu pulls his fingers from her, smiling when she whines at the loss of contact. But he’s able to soother her before she can get too fussy; one moment Y/N is on top of him, struggling to not rock against his thigh and relieve some of the pressure building up inside of her, the next Atsumu has her flipped over so her back, her body caged between the back of the sofa and his arms. A hand on either side of her head as he bends in, sweeps his tongue at a strip of salty skin just beneath her jaw. He hastily shoves up the shirt she’s wearing, revealing more of her and letting his hands graze over her breasts lightly at first before kneading them. She feels lightheaded while his mouth works on her throat, biting and sucking a bruise at the base of it that makes her gulp. Parting from the skin with a gentle kiss and a small, whispered comment of, “Taste so good, so soft and sweet. Been holding out on me, hmm?”

For the first time ever, Y/N has Atsumu in her arms and has no need to push him away - no, instead she’s holding onto him as if she’d die if he slipped away from her, her hands gripping his broad shoulders before sliding up into his hair as he makes his way down her body. He’s practically praising her - pressing wet, open mouthed kisses on her skin as he moves downwards, fingers making quick work of tugging her bottoms off, helping her kick out of them quickly and clumsily. She knows that Atsumu is not a patient man, but this is a whole other level of impatience. He’s pushing her thighs open, cold fingers squeezing at the soft flesh of her thighs as he scoots down to be at eye-level with the barest part of her, making sure her calves are hooked over his shoulders. Y/N can’t remember a time when she’s ever been in a more vulnerable position, but instead of shying away like her instincts would have her, she finds herself moving to better accommodate the man between her legs. Her eyes catch his caramel colored ones and her breath catches in her throat; he’s staring at her, enamored by her.

“Such a pretty little thing aren’t ya?” he murmurs, lips forming a gentle kiss on her inner thigh but before she can retort he gives one long, gentle swipe of his tongue directly up the middle of her folds. She gasps, face turned away from him and thighs threatening to close, but he shifts his hand to stop her, holding her in place. “Aht… don’t get shy now, lemme get a taste.”

It’s too much when he dives back in, skilled mouth a vicious match for his insatiable need to please. As he strokes his soft, wet tongue deeper and deeper between her slippery folds that part around him willingly. Y/N’s sure she’s moments away from swearing her undying fealty to whatever higher being put this on her plate for today.  Puckering his lips around her clit after stopping just before sucking on her until it was swollen and even greedier for his attention. Dipping his tongue inside of her hole, humming appreciatively against her and only feeding into the whimpering sounds filtering out of her mouth.

Embarrassingly, Y/N feels that she’s nearing her end - despite the shame of admitting that it's coming too fast, she feels the need to tell him anyway. “Hmph… g’na cum,” she chokes out, hoping that he heard her because all she can hear is the blood rushing in her ears. Every sense is suffocated by Atsumu’s presence, and she’s shameless as she lets every pant slip past her lips, feeding into Atsumu’s ego. “‘m so close, I need it. Need you to – to keep going please, ‘Tsumu”

And he does, gets her to the edge of her high before sliding his mouth away from her. The whine that falls past her lips is deafening, eyes opening and seeing that he’s just nuzzling her thigh, lips making light work at marking the soft flesh. “No, no you said… said you’d help.. Please I’m-” she’s hiccuping, tripping over her words numbly as she tries tugging his head back to where she’s most desperate for him.

He hums at her softly, almost patronizingly, as he places a kiss to the skin closest to his mouth. “Don’t cry pretty girl.. Won’t leave you hanging, ‘ts so warm down ‘ere… might have to stay forever, tha’ okay?” He is disgusting, filthy, so sinfully good. And true to his word, he goes back in without another word, only a small smile and his own hum that vibrates through her lower half. When he takes her clit back between his lips, it’s all she needs. Every tense muscle finally seizing to his maximum strain; it’s like she was a string that’d been stretched too far and finally frayed in the middle, snapping. She can hear her heartbeat thumping like a bass in her ears, can feel the way she’s twitching under Atsumu’s relentless movements, and it drowns out her own noises that she’s making.

Moments later, all that can be heard is her bated breathing, head completely empty and eyes heavy, flickering and fluttering with just how light she feels. Atsumu kisses his way back up to be face-to-face with her, making sure to peck gently at the marks he’d littered her skin with. His face is buried in the base of her throat, their arms tangled around each other lazily - Y/N feels too sleepy to protest the way that he’s pressing all his weight onto her; but isn’t too tired to realize that he’s hard when her hips wiggle to accommodate him between her legs, maybe has been the entire time, which confuses her slightly. Why would he be hard over her? She understands her total arousal over him since she bitched him into submission, but him? If anything, him being hard right now just proves, to Y/N at least, that maybe he would get it up with anything. But what if it is for you, her heart wonders briefly.

“‘Tsumu… are you-?”

“Shh, ‘ts alright. Let's get you to bed.” And he moves to slide off her, moving to guide the two of them to her bed, which was a feat on its own considering Y/N’s legs feel like jelly. All he can do is smile at her, taking in her relaxed face and mused hair. He settles her into bed, sliding up next to her and pulling her onto his chest, lips pressed into the crown of her head.  Before Y/N can even think of a way to say thank you, she feels sleep taking over, choosing instead to just indulge (for once) in the pseudo-domestic situation she’s in tonight.

The following morning, Y/N almost doesn’t want to wake up, isn’t ready to come to terms with whatever happened yesterday. Long gone is the lusty drunkenness from last night, but Atsumu...Atsumu is still fully there, lips pursed and arms shoved under the pillow - Y/N holds back the urge to trace her fingers along the lines of his arm. She russells around, hoping that sleep takes over her again so she can justify waking up wrapped around Atsumu - her attempts are futile though when she feels a firm squeeze at her side, cold fingers making her jump slightly.

“Wha’s wrong?”

She mumbles a barely coherent “nothing,” to which Atsumu just hums, snaking his arm over Y/N’s middle and pulling her towards him, chest to chest with his breath fanning over her face. She swears she could die a happy person now. Wants to have every morning be like this, him in her too small bed, squishing themselves together for warmth, just the sheer proximity is enough, she muses to herself. Apparently, Y/N is thinking just a little too loud this morning for Atsumu’s liking because he sighs softly, asking if she’s sure nothing is wrong.

“Mm ‘m fine. Jus’ tryna get comfortable, go back to sleep.”

“Can’t now, all yer wiggling woke me up” And before she can even retort, he shifts slightly, practically forcing his groin on her thigh, to which she squeaks softly. “Jus go back to sleep… too early for breakfast.”

“Bu- Tsumu.. Lemme..” she starts, shyly. She did have this inherent need to pay him back for what happened, and she can only equate his favor with something equally as...pleasurable?...fulfilling? She can’t find the right word but the most equal compensation for sex has to be more sex, right? The sleep in her bones is fully gone now, her hands sliding down his sides slowly, tentatively. “Please...wanna jus’-”

“Don’t have to, can just go to the rest- sh-shit.” He starts, his own hand reaching to stop hers but his movements stutter when she palms at his crotch, giving his bulge a full on grope. She shushes him softly, lips moving to peck his jaw softly as she snakes her hands past the tight confines of his underwear; and though she can’t see much of what is going on she can feel how thick Atsumu is. His hands have shifted slightly, one arm resting behind her and the other cupping her face, their lips tangled in kisses that feel too sweet and far from platonic.

Moments pass, and it's apparent that Y/N is moving much too slowly for Atsumu, him bucking into her hand and his hips rolling in uncalculated and sloppy movements. He whines softly when she pulls her lips off his, both softly gasping for air, but she shushes him, using the most minimal amount of strength to push him onto his back and settles between his massive thighs. By this point, once fully exposed in front of her, he's so hard that the foreskin is already drawn away from the head, tip slick and wet with precum. She’s gentle, wanting to preserve the quietness that comes with waking up at eight in the morning, as she presses a few open mouth kisses at the patch of hair below his belly button.

And it’s all over from here. Y/N ducked herself down, licking from the dip of his balls to his drippy head in one broad swipe. Y/N shudders softly at the whimper she’s able to pull out of the man above her, thinking that it’s probably the best noise she’d ever elicited from a man. Atsumu runs his fingers through her hair as she slides his head into her mouth, fingers deftly scraping at her scalp as she begins sucking. She sucks him like she wants to – like this was the most perfect way to spend every morning, with her blonde, dumb, stupid best friend stuffing her mouth. Both are still hazy with sleep, but that doesn’t stop Y/N from pulling him in deeper, hollowing her cheeks as she begins bobbing her head and moving her hand in tandem to stroke at what can’t fit in her mouth.

His fingers start to tangle in her hair rather than comb through it, his moans filling the room, punctuated with little encouragements that she hums at around him, like, “Tha’s it, there’s my good girl,” and through shaky laughs, “M'gonna cum if you keep doing that, baby.” Eventually, Y/N knows that he must be near his peak, but she pauses, eyes locking with his caramel colored ones, as she pulls her mouth away to let his length just rest on her tongue.

“Fuck yer pretty… so good aren’t ya?” He whisper-groans at her, gripping her hair a little harder when she tilts her head to the side, allow him to shallowly fuck himself between her lips, his thumb tracing the bulge his dick made in her cheek. “Need'a pull off if y'don’t wanna taste, baby… gettin so- fuck- so close.” He gives her hair a slight tug, like he might actually pull her off himself, but she doesn’t allow him; she just shifts her mouth, making light work of wrapping her lips around his tip, sucking greedily with and humming in protest around him. And it’s that that sends him over, twitching in her mouth as he sputters off shaky profanities before she feels shot after shot of white ropes hitting her tongue. Y/N can’t help but stare at him above her, relishing in the fact that this morning she gets to see him shake and shudder because of her.

Y/N pops off him gently, drawing back and humming at the lingering salty taste he’s left on her tongue. She graces the skin of his heaving abdomen with soft, fluttering kisses as she tucks him back into his underwear, before she crawls up his body, legs swinging to straddle his narrow hips. He’s got an arm thrown over his eyes, neck red and he seems almost bashful underneath her (which makes Y/N’s heart swell with adoration at just how him he is). She wiggles softly, folding her hands on his chest and laying her chin on them, waiting for him to say something to her. She blows a laugh through her nose when he finally looks down at her, eyes glimmering and lips pulled in the shyest smile she thinks she’s ever seen on him.

“You… yer good. Too good… just wow.”

---

Suffice to say lots has happened in the week following the pair quite literally eating their hearts out.

Firstly, Atsumu spent nearly every evening at her apartment that week. He waited every single day outside of her office building - her coworkers have taken to telling her how lucky she is that she has a man waiting for her with this whipped look on her face, but she swears up and down (with warm cheeks) that it's not like that. They eat dinner, alternating between picking up something on the way or cooking together - and by cooking, just picture Atsumu cutting vegetables in uneven chunks while Y/N scolds him for not adding enough water to the rice cooker. Normally this could happen: it's not super rare that they visit each other during the week if it's convenient - what is definitely not in the norm is the fact that Atsumu has buried himself between Y/N’s thighs thrice this week. It starts when Y/N looks too stressed on Tuesday evening, that Atsumu pulls her legs over his lap in an attempt to “massage some of the stress away,” which only leads to him manhandling her onto her back, promising to give her something else to cry about besides work.

Secondly, Osamu thought it would be best to alert Y/N that Atsumu had a very awkward conversation with a woman during lunch on Thursday - it was secretly his way of asking her to ask Atsumu what happened because both Y/N and Osamu were terrible gossips who feed off each other. When Y/N asked though, all Atsumu said was that the whole conversation didn’t matter, that the woman (who Y/N learned was actually Michimiya) wanted more than Atsumu was able to give to her. That their lives weren’t in sync or whatever, that they’d eventually manage to be co-workers at best. To say that Y/N wasn’t elated at the news would be a bold-faced lie.

Y/N feels on cloud nine, feels like she doesn’t even need to have a conversation with Atsumu about what their situation is currently. She gets to reap all the benefits of a relationship now, she’s physically taken care of and emotionally spoiled. Only thing she’s actually missing is the title but what's in a word, right?Atsumu wasn’t a natural flirt, always hid compliments behind a harsh delivery - but lately he’s taken to drowning Y/N in compliments, even the corny ones. Y/N expected a post-nut “god yer pretty,” but what occasionally caught her off was when he would open the door for her (normal) and say that “a pretty gal like you should never hafta touch a handle” (not normal). Subconsciously, Y/N feels like he’s only trying to compliment his way into her pants, but she chooses to ignore the way he coos at “just how gorgeous her eyes are” when he makes eye contact with her during a midnight snack.

On the second Thursday following the start of the Y/N-Astumu situationship, Y/N has no choice really other than to ask Atsumu what’s going on with them. They’re at the grocery store by his place (he’d convinced her to take the following day off work and spend the night with him), everything is more than normal when the pair’s conversation gets interrupted by a literal model-esque person, touching Atsumu’s shoulder. Y/N tries to sneak her hand from his arm, but he grasps her hand before she can get too far, looking at the stranger with a less-than-friendly expression.

“Oh Miya! I’m a huge fan, would you mind taking a photo with me?” He indulges his fan, never letting go of Y/N’s hand, even as she steps out of the camera’s focus. The stranger parts with a grateful smile to both Atsumu and Y/N, which feels unnecessary, but Y/N returns anyway. The friends continue their shopping trip before making the trek to Atsumu’s apartment building. Y/N is quiet, in her head about the whole fan interaction that lasted a total of five minutes, but Atsumu says nothing - even stays quiet until the pair are up in his apartment.

“Everything okay? Not bored of me are ya?”

She smiles weakly at him, settling to rest against his kitchen counter. “It’s just… I- nevermind it’s stupid.” She shakes her head, hand waving in front of her as if trying to shoo away the negative cloud above her head. But Atsumu quickly grabs her hand, pulling her into the space between his arms.

“It’s not stupid if ‘s how yer feeling.. What’s up?”

“Okay…” She starts, pushing away from his chest to give herself some literal and mental space. He crosses his arms over his chest, leaning back at the opposite counter to Y/N, who's mirroring his stance except her head is thrown back, eyes searching his ceiling for the right words to come next. “Are you always like… this… with the girls who give you head?” When she looks at him, his head is tilted to the left in confusion, making her huff anxiously. “Okaaay.. you’ve complimented me more in the past three weeks than any other person has in my entire life… is that normal for you to do with the girls hooking up with you or am I the exception? It’s not a big deal.. It’s just that you -”

“I compliment you because you deserve to be complimented, sweetheart… but if it makes you uncomfortable then I can stop.” He cuts in, before he uncrosses his arms, palms gripping at the counter behind him. “As for the whole hooking up part… is that what you want this to be? ‘Cos we can do that, up to you Y/N, I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give -”

“But why? Until three weeks ago I was under the impression that I wasn’t your ‘type’ or whatever so why now are you suddenly on board with taking whatever I give you?”

He laughs, and Y/N wants to cry. Why wasn’t he taking this seriously? Y/N is good at feeling her feelings, but has a hard time clearly expressing those feelings into words.

“Don’t laugh a-”

“Who told you what my type was? If it was ‘Samu or Omi I swear I’ll -”

“You did. You said I wasn’t your type.” He balks, eyes wide and riddled with trying to think about when he said it. “It was forever ago, but you said it. You came back from Germany, I picked you up and ‘Samu had called while I went to the restroom and well.. I overheard you say-”

“Yer an idiot, made an assumption before ya knew the whole truth, baby. I was talking about this photographer that I was kinda seein’ at the time. M’brother asked why if she’d get mad that I chose to see you fresh off the plane instead of her, said it didn’t matter because she wasn’t my type.”

Y/N wishes that the floor of his ridiculously priced apartment would swallow her whole, or that if she pushed the right buttons on his fancy microwave she’d be able to rewind life to five minutes ago when she decided to start this conversation. Frankly, she feels silly and like she shouldn’t say anything else - she knows that her words conveyed a little bit of insecurity that she’s sure Atsumu doesn’t want to have to deal with.

A beat passes before both Y/N and Atsumu open their mouths, but he’s able to get out the words first. “You really thought that you weren’t my type?” Fuck his smug little desbelieving smile.

“Don’t gimme that look - you’re usually spotted around the globe with gorgeous people… ‘s it really wrong of me to assume that I wasn’t your type? Besides,” she starts, arms crossed around her middle while Atsumu takes a tentative step to close the gap between them. “It's not that it matters now since, y’know I know that it's not true.. Just hurt my feelings at the time and well…”

“You were supposed to be the smart one between us, got the college degree ‘n everythin.” He teases, arms reaching to rest on her waist. “For someone so smart you really missed all the signs huh? Why do you think I stepped in every time some guy tried to talk t’ya? Why d’ya think that I tried to take up all your weekend time, don’t get me wrong I love spendin’ time with ya but also didn’t wanna see you goin out with any guys you’d met when I wasn’t around.” By this point he’s got her chin in his hand, ducking his head slightly to make her look at him fully. “And why the hell would I eat you out at every possible opportunity once I’ve been given the okay? Just because I get thrown it all the time by others doesn’t mean that I eat out every -”

“Alright, alright. You can shut up now. I get it, I’m dumb. I just didn’t think -”

“Oh you got tha’ right - didn’t think at all did ya?” She groans, throwing her head back. She’ll never be able to get the image of his smug face out of her head, never going to be able to live down how for once in their years long friendship Atsumu was smarter than her. All he can do though is laugh, pulling her face back down to his and giving her forehead a soft kiss, making her stomach erupt with flutters.

“If you tell anyone about this conversation, I swear to god Miya I’ll-”

“Shh it’s always gotta be a threat with you huh? Why can’t you just admit that you were stupid for once?”

“Not happening.”

“Not even if it means you’re stupidly in like with me”

“No, because I’m not stupidly in like with you… I just adore your stupid self more than I’d ever admit in front of anyone else.”

He laughs, bumping his nose against her with a laugh before kissing her softly. Everything is great, life is great. Y/N loves Atsumu and Atsumu loves her, and she isn’t some sad, movie cliché any longer. She’s got this gorgeous guy who practically worships her, so freely giving himself to her. He pulls away from kissing her for a second, taking a moment to appreciate the way that her eyes are closed happily.

“Just so y’know… I adore you too.” Kiss. “But you are never allowed to call me stupid again… from now on I’m the smart one in this relationship.”

A/N pt2: and so that’s it hehe. thank you sm for reading I hope you enjoyed it. any little comments you have in the tags would be nice to read or yeah. this is my side blog so like hgjdgsh if I respond to you it’s gonna be from my main haha

#okay now I can type in the tags but basically I’m actually v proud of this not so little fic and so I just sjdjdjdj #if you’re reading the tags ily #tysm for reading my fic I appreciate u!! <3 #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu fic #haikyuu smut #haikyuu fluff #miya atsumu x reader #miya atsumu x female reader #miya atsumu x y/n #miya atsumu fluff #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu miya x female reader #miya atsumu smut #atsumu miya fluff #atsumu miya smut

[crowdedimagines]

Leaked (Finale) Harry Styles

“You guys got to see a very raw and real side of us. It’s a bummer that it wasn’t our choice, we didn’t choose to reveal such a personal thing that happened, not to mention what else has been leaked.” I sigh, finally breaking eye contact with the camera sitting on a tripod in front of us. The fans will be getting a glimpse into Harry’s home for this video.

“I know what I signed up for when I got into this business, very little privacy, but I never expected it to come to this extreme. M’very private with my relationships, and I never want to see anyone-'' He pauses to focus himself again, I place a hand on his thigh and attempt to carry on. Against the better judgement of both Jeff and Jordan we both decided against a script, we had highlighted points we wanted to address, but didn’t want it to seem disingenuous.

“Harry and I lost a child last July.” I pick my head up letting the tears openly fall without letting myself choke over them, “And the song you guys have all heard came from that, a place of hurt and exhaustion. We never expected the world to hear it, and we never thought those pictures would be out in the world either. But that’s life isn’t it?” I laugh humorlessly.

The song was leaked a few hours ago now, my name having never left the top trending on twitter, but now Harry’s and several conspiracies have joined it. People cutting parts from it with raw and loud sobs coming from each of us, open for discussion among the whole world.

“We love you all, but please understand our choice to step back from the public for the time being.” Harry chimes in. We both look at each other and nod, feeling we addressed what we need to.

“Treat people with kindness, yeah?” I ask as we both get up from our spot on Harry’s couch.

“Yeah.” He pulls me in for a hug, as Jeff gets up to cut the camera. Our teams were both getting the footage and posting it to our accounts. Harry and I have both agreed to a break from phones for a bit.

“Okay, so this will be posted across all platforms, on both of your accounts shortly. I don’t think we’ll need to edit much.”

I walk over to the other side of the living room where Jordan is standing reading through her phone, she glances up as soon as she sees me coming. She puts on a smile, and pulls me in for a tight hug. She knows just how long the past few days have been.

“Alright, Paula and I booked flights, we’re heading out this afternoon to go home.”

“What about me?” I question.

“We both know that you need to stay here for a while.” She smiles, “Take some time to heal, just remember you two never fell out of love. Call me if you need anything.”

I glance back at Harry whose now joined by his sister and mother. I don’t want to leave, to be completely honest. The last thing I want is to have to go home to my empty house in L.A. Harry and I ran away from each other last year, maybe this is the opportunity for us to finally stop running.

Harry’s POV

“Don’t you think that you need to heal together this time? You can’t let her leave again.” My mum explains, trying to make her point, as quietly as possible. I watch as she glances over my shoulder to where Y/n must be somewhere.

“Mum, I can’t make her stay.” I shake my head. I couldn’t make her stay before, now we’ve spent so much time apart. All I want is to pull her into my arms, but I don’t know if that’s what she wants after all this time. Hell, after this week she might not ever want anything to do with me.

“No, but you can ask her.” Gemma nods her head in Y/n’s direction as she walks over to join us.

“Harry, can I talk to you?” Her voice is soft and calm. My shoulders visibly drop as I relax and follow her to the back porch. We sit in the same spot on the couch as we did yesterday.

“What’s going on, love?” I ask once we’ve both taken a seat.

“Well, Jordan and Paula are flying out this afternoon.” She says, she pulls her legs up close to her chest.

“And you?”

Please god tell me you’re staying.

“I think I might stay.” She picks up her head, “If that's alright with you.”

I can’t fight off the smile at this point. I just give her a simple nod, pulling her close to lean on my shoulder. I should’ve known that we were on the exact same page, we always have been.

“I don’t think I could go back to an empty house, to be honest.” She sighs.

“I don’t think I could let you walk out of that door again, to be honest.”

Y/n’s POV

“Do you mean that?” I ask, picking up my head, “Truly?”

He simply nods and bites at his bottom lip.

“What are we supposed to do, Harry? I don’t think we can just pick up where we left off?”

“No, but isn’t that the beauty of it? We can try again, try for a different outcome. Build on how much we already love each other.”

“Hmm, how much we already love each other?” I smirk, my tone taking on a teasing edge.

“Mhm.” Harry hums, his cheeks taking on a pink hue.

“Alright Styles, lets give this a shot.”

T W O Y E A R S L A T E R

“Hello? Is anybody home?” Anne’s voice rings out loudly as she lets herself in the front door.

I make my way downstairs, I’m sure that she’s found Harry who's in the kitchen getting dinner prepared. Gemma got here about ten minutes ago. I put on a record and go to stand in the doorway and watch the encounter. Anne gives her son a big hug, stealing a carrot from his cutting board as they make small chat to catch up.

“Hello.” I walk in, making my presence known.

“Look out you!” Anne squeals, “You’re glowing!” She immediately walks over to pull me in for a hug, her hands resting on my belly once I pull away.

“I feel like a bit of a whale, but thank you.” I smile.

“Oh hush it.” Harry scolds.

“How’re you feeling?”

“Like I’m having a baby in four weeks.”

“Yeah, and she’s still going on runs!” Harry says with a proud grin, “Every morning she gets up with me and we run a few miles.”

“It’s pretty much a fast walk for Harry though.” I smile.

“Yeah, but he isn’t forming a pancreas while he does it!” Gemma cuts in making us all laugh. “We’re more impressed with you.”

“Exactly.” Harry presses a kiss to my temple.

I join Gemma at the counter while Anne helps Harry finish cooking everything. I would help, but my ankles are too swollen by the end of the day, and I know everyone in the room would kick me out before I could even start.

“So, things have been going well with everything? You guys feeling ready to be parents?” Anne grins.

“Is anyone ready before they are?” I ask, “I’m just trying to take it one day at a time, and read as much as I can.”

“You guys will be wonderful parents.”

It means the world to hear this from Anne. It’s been weird to be in London for most of the pregnancy and away from my own mother, but it’s been a blessing to have Anne. She’s an amazing mom herself, and she hasn’t complained once over my odd and annoying questions.

“And if not they’ll have the best Aunt ever to make up for it.”

I roll my eyes and take Gemma’s hand in mine and set it on the front of my belly. Moving and adjusting to the exact spot that the little bean is kicking in.

“That’s mad.” She sighs, “I don’t think I would ever be able to get over that.”

“Harry can be like a leech sometimes! Can’t get him off.” I laugh.

“You feel it all, I’m going to steal as much time as I possibly can.”

We all sit down to eat, and catch up on everything that we’ve missed in life over the past few weeks. Ever since the pregnancy both Anne and Gemma have made an effort to come to our house as often as they can for meals, or even just a visit.

I think we were all a bit shocked to find out I was once again pregnant. Harry and I couldn’t believe it at first, I don’t think we wanted to. Didn’t want to risk getting our hopes up. It had been a year and a few months since we got back together when we found out. Four tests sitting on the counter, two thins lines on each of them.

We waited a long time before telling anyone, too afraid that it could be a repeat of what happened those years ago. Once we did finally tell our families they couldn’t be more excited. The fans were too, surprisingly. I debated pulling a Kylie Jenner and just disappearing from the world for months, but I knew I would get too stir crazy. So as soon as the bump was visible, Harry and I both confirmed it on social media.

The fans were happy for us, most of them were so disappointed and saddened about what happened, they felt bad that we were made to share things neither of us were ready too. This time we were trending for positive reasons, and I’ve never felt more supported by everyone in my life.

F O U R W E E K S L A T E R

“Love, are you sure I’m good to go to the studio?” Harry asks for the millionth time, not wanting to leave me home alone so close to my due date.

“Yes!” I laugh, pushing him closer to the door, “You actually have the time while the bean is inside me, I’ll need you here once they’re out.”

“Alright.” He says with hesitancy, “Please call me for anything. The studio isn’t even far from here, so please don’t hesitate with anything.”

“Ok, babe, just go so you can come back!”

“Promise you’ll call?”

“Yes, I promise.” I laugh, he’s always been protective, but now he’s to a whole nother level since the pregnancy.

“Alright, I’ll bring home food too, I really shouldn’t be gone too long.”

“That’s perfect, babe! Maybe we can get - ow!”

He instantly turns around and pulls his hand from the door when I cry out in pain.

“Darling? Are you okay?”

“No, I’m fine.” I hold out my hand, “It was just this really sharp-ow!”

I cry out again, clutching my belly. Before I know it, a warm liquid is spreading down my legs.

“Love, your water just broke!” He cheers, his eyes saying nervous but he has a smile on his face. “I guess I’m not going to the studio.”

“Oh god!” I groan, I start waddling towards the door, “Okay, you grab the go-bag, I’m gonna start walking to the car.”

I know it might take me awhile to get there. I know it’s not true, but I feel like I need to keep my knees shut from keeping the little bean from falling out.

“Right, go bag.” He mutters to himself, slowly becoming more flustered, “Should we call an ambulance?”

“No.” I laugh, taking deep breaths.

“Love, are you sure you’re okay?”

“Just grab the bag so we can go to the hospital.”

“Yeah-”

“Harry!” I yell, “In the coming hours I am going to force a human being out of my vagina. Now I personally would like to do that at a hospital, will you go grab the bag, or do you need me to do it?”

He swallows and runs upstairs to grab the bag and I make my way to the car. It doesn’t take him long at all, now he’s finally had some sense smacked into him.

“We’re really doing this?” He asks, smiling as he pulls out of the driveway.

“We’re really doing this.” I grin, taking his hand in mine.

O N E   Y E A R  L A T E R

“Happy birthday to you dear, Anderson, happy birthday to you!” We all sing to the little one year old boy I hold tight to my chest.

“Let’s blow out the candles, baby.” I lean forward and blow out the singular candle for the one year old. We made a true event of it, calling everyone we knew practically to celebrate in our backyard, complete with so many games for other children, even though our son was still too young to play most of them. Harry and I couldn’t be more proud of our little boy.

Everyone cheers, I smile looking at Harry who’s got a similar grin. A year in the making to get to this day, lot’s of late nights, but more laughter than anything else. It’s been a wonderful afternoon, everyone loving the little boy who looks practically identical to his father. Cheering as he smashes his little cake all over his face, the table, and his clothes.

“Alright, let’s have Grandma get you all cleaned up!” Anne says as she steals Anderson from me. I smile watching her take the giggly little boy inside to get the cake he’s managed to smear everywhere cleaned off.

Most everyone has left at this point, it has been a packed house to celebrate the one year old, but as it gets later things slow down. It’s finally just down to immediate family and Harry and I can put our feet up for a few minutes.

“Can you believe it? A whole year we’ve been parents.” I lean back into Harry’s side. We’re sat on the outdoor couch, a spot that has grown to contain a lot of heart to hearts over the years.

“No, he’s getting too big too fast.” Harry presses a kiss to the top of my head, “He’s going to be needing another sibling soon.”

I let out a soft chuckle.

“Hmm, is that so?”

“Yeah, who wouldn’t want another kid like that?” We both look over our shoulders to peek in to see Gemma and Anne playing with blocks on the floor in the living room.

“Are you gonna push the next one out?” I tease, I get up and grab the only unopened present that’s remained on the table all day.

“It’s funny that you should say that.” I smirk, turning my attention back on the man I love. I hand him the box, neatly wrapped in polka-dot paper.

“What’s this?”

“Just open it.” I sit down again.

He tears the paper from the box and flips the lid open. His jaw dropping as soon as he sees the contents. Pulling out an olive green tee shirt for Anderson. Simply written across it is “Big Brother”

“You’re teasing me?” His eyes look hopeful though, like he’s praying I wouldn’t tease him like that.

“You can check the four tests in my drawer in the bathroom if you don’t believe me.” I smirk, “Or the fact that I have an appointment at the clinic this Monday.”

“Shut up.” His grin only getting wider.

“Baby Styles number two, coming soon.”

He tackles me down to the couch, a big warm hug.

“Oh my god.” He sighs into my neck. “I can’t wait to do this all again.”

“Me neither.” I grin, rubbing my hands up and down his back. He finally pulls back to get a good look at me, holding my face in his hands.

“God, I love you so much.”

“I love you, too.”

kinda cheese, but a fun way to end it! this was cute lol

#harry styles x reader #harry styles imagine #Harry Styles

[discoursecatharsis]

Indefinite hiatus & archiving this account

I’m going to be taking an indefinite hiatus from this account. I’m not sure for how long, and I may or may not return in the future. But for now, I need a break from fandom discourse.

----------

I initially got involved in fandom “discourse” because I wanted to complain about self-named anti-Otayuris spamming the ship tag and generally being annoying and harassing shippers who were minding their own business. So I made a side account on Tumblr to vent about that. There were other accounts talking about these recent developments in fandom too, and I wanted an account to interact with them on. People started reblogging my posts, and others started to share their experiences of being harassed over ships or fanart or fanfic in their fandoms too in my replies and inbox. I made a Twitter account at some point also. I always just wanted a place to vent with others. I never imagined or expected that my accounts would garner this much attention or would blow up to the level that they’re at now.

As a result, honestly, as my follower numbers have grown and as I’ve gotten more involved in fandom discourse, it’s made me more and more anxious. This account has been making me feel like a nervous wreck the past year or so.

I also just don't have the spoons for much of it anymore. Some days, discourse makes me feel stressed or anxious. Most days, I'm apathetic to it, like it's the same old recycled nonsense. I've done this for a long while now and I feel like I need a nice, long break from it, probably a permanent break.

I believe that the topics involved in fandom discourse, the issue of fantis harassing people and making fandom toxic, etc. are still important to talk about and bring awareness to. But at the same time, I feel like I've done and said all that I can, and I'm feeling burnt out. I’m also feeling like I’m repeating myself at this point. There are only so many times that I can say some variation of “don’t harass people over fanart or fanfic, block artists/writers and leave them alone.” And I know many others are saying this as well. The harassers in fandom definitely do seem like a majority with how loud they are and how they so often get away with what they do. And while it may not seem like it, I do believe that more and more people in fandom are fed up with the harassment and starting to push back, starting to voice their annoyance with fandom harassers, and starting to stand up against it and support each other.

There are definitely more topics related to fandom discourse too, beyond this, of course. Some very serious and important topics to discuss, such as when there is bigotry in fandom spaces. Genuine criticism of various media (minus the harassment) is always good and healthy to have too. And I hope people will continue to talk about these topics and have these meaningful discussions.

I will no longer be active on Twitter or Tumblr, but I may continue making videos on my Youtube channel. I don’t make videos often but I’ve been enjoying it, and I think it’s a better outlet for me to focus my energy on. Creating videos on these topics at my own pace is definitely less stressful than being an active participant on Twitter.

My Twitter DMs will remain closed to new messages, just so if/when I do return, I won’t have a ton of new DMs. But I will leave my Tumblr inbox and curiouscat open for anonymous venting if you need it! Anonymous venting is one reason why I initially made my tumblr account after all, so I want to leave it like that.

I’ve kind of been using my second Twitter account (catharsiscourse) as a makeshift personal account, so if you would like to keep in touch with me, you can follow me there! I’ll only be somewhat active there but that’s where I retweet fanart and such.

You can find links to all of these accounts in my carrd here: https://lizcourserants.carrd.co/#links

Lastly, thank you all so much for the support over the years. I know I’m not perfect and I’ve made some mistakes. My intentions have always been good but I know I would sometimes get caught up in the discourse and miss the mark. So if I’ve ever hurt you in any way or said or did anything wrong, I’m sorry. My goal has always been to vent about and bring awareness to the toxicity that’s been rearing its ugly head in fandom spaces as of late. And even though I’ve messed up at times, I hope I brought more good than bad to the table.

I know fandom’s been a bit hellish to navigate lately and things seem grim at times. But if we keep speaking up like we have been and continue supporting each other and keeping to our groups of trusted fandom friends, I think we’ll be okay.

Remember to be kind and support your friends in fandom. Take care, everyone 🤍

----------

Also I'm not deactivating. I've worked too hard on my Tumblr blog and Twitter account and such and I couldn't bring myself to delete them lol. So I’ll leave my accounts up as an archive of sorts. But please feel free to bookmark, screenshot, or archive whatever you want or need, just in case my accounts get suspended or something.

Thank you all so much for the support throughout the years! I’m grateful for all of the lovely people I’ve met because of this. I hope you all continue to look out for yourselves and for each other both inside and outside of fandom. Stay safe and take care.❤️

I want to end this with something productive and helpful, so here are links to two organizations dedicated to eliminating child sexual abuse: ECPAT and Thorn. Please help however you can, whether that’s by donating or just sharing these organizations’ donation pages:

https://www.ecpat.org/donate/

https://www.thorn.org/donate/

#personal

[annetteblog]

Intro & My take on KM

Hi!

I’m new around here so it’s supposed to be (not so short) introduction, since I don’t know how to start a blog heh. I hope to sprinkle my 0.5 cents into the KM conversation and maybe to bring a new perspective from someone, who is not a part of the typical English-speaking West.

Who /the hell/ Am I?  

(please, consider it to be said with NJ’s voice from Intro: Persona :D)

I was born in Siberia (it’s in the Asian part of Russia), currently live in the European part of the country while studying at a Uni (European in terms of geography, not in terms of everything else i’m definitely not shading rn lolllll). English is not my first language, I’ve just kind of learnt it to some extent. Due to this it takes me more time to write a post; and I may (and will) make some grammatical & other mistakes. Plus I’m lazy AND busy with Uni, so I won’t even promise to be consistent in posting smth lol. But I thought I need more practice in terms of writing in English, so here I am, actually scribbling something. This feels weird, because I’ve been around stan Tumblr since 2015, but never ever interacted, just read.

How I ended up around Jikook/Kookmin (and BTS) & My (long&messy) take on this matter

Although I had heard of BTS before, I became an Army only in October 2018. I had kinda avoided them, because you know... boybands.... sing songs about romantic love and how they love girls.......... (+I had been around Twitter when 1D been at their peak and I remember a quite toxic community of fans, whom always had scared me). Shortly, hello stereotypes. Obviously, after I got engaged I felt terribly sorry that I had been sleeping on them, but what is done cannot be undone. 

Someone I knew back then reposted one of their MVs and I, during my sad hours of procrastination, decided to watch it. Then I saw their live performance with the same song. And I thought “wow these guys can sing and dance and the music is kinda cool, i need to check this out maybe??” 

Then a funny thing happened. One of the next videos I watched (the same person had it added to their page) was a 2016 BangtanBomb where JM and JK practiced their Coming of Age dance. 

Do you know this moment with Gina from the 1st episode of Brooklyn 9-9:

Well, that was precisely me after I watched it. I don’t even know how to explain this, it was kind of a gut feeling? Whatever you call it, I started to get suspicious and couldn’t even explain to myself why. /actually now a do have questions to this vid and the main one - why does everyone cringe that much? if it’s a girly choreo than they had done some “girly” moves before. why is there such strong reaction??/

I started to get deeper and went to some ru-shipper communities. Shipping culture among Russian speaking fans is... well, weird to some extent, but I maybe address this topic some time later. You need to consider that (as far as you probably know) Russia is quite homophonic country and sadly is not the greatest place for LGBTQ+ community at the moment. The non-frienly influential attitudes hanging in the society + the general shippers’ weirdness = the result is not that nice honestly. 

I struggled for some time in order to find more mature people (not just in terms of age but in general sanity), failed, ended up with some EXTREMELY toxic ru-fans of TK, which was/is the most popular pairing here, spent among them like 15 minutes and ran away horrified. After that I didn’t even try to engage with shippers or believers or whatever of any pair and just decided to enjoy the music and the content (which is a great idea, highly recommend!)

After a couple of days I discovered that JK makes videos. I love video, films and visual art so I immediately found them on YT, saw the titles with names of different cities from all over the world and was like “Oh that must be so cool, he’s visited so many outstanding places I’ve never been to, so I really need to watch it! I shall enjoy some beautyyy”. Then I clicked on GCFt.

Well, what can I say. I did enjoy some beauty, but not the type I had initially anticipated. The biggest clickbait in my entire life. JK should be proud of himself.

                                       /as I said - the beauty/

I had already known Troy back then and I known the song’s lyrics so it would not be an underestimation to say - the video just blew my mind. I was like - hold on is this real? seriously?? no really really????? he manage to get away with something THAT obvious?????? dude how

As a person who edited videos AND is not a native English speaker, I don’t buy the explanation “oh he mustve didnt get the lyrics lmao”. You just don’t do that. You don’t. DON’T. You google and translate every shit you don’t understand, every word and idiom you’ve never encountered, because otherwise the possibility of an epic failure is very likely. You wouldn’t want to give your mum a video as a birthday present and then discover that you used a song with WAP-ish lyrics, right? (well maybe that would be okay in your family, I don’t judge, but that’s not the case for people I know). So don’t you dare to degrade JK’s intellectual capacities; such assumption is really offensive. He is a smart boii, he knows exactly what he’s doing in terms of his art.

So I was shocked, but decided to look for the context - maybe I missed some previous events regarding this Tokyo thing (another great idea - always check the context). Well, apparently I didn’t, because the whole narrative with the trip for two, lovely selfies etc. made my poor brain lowkey explode. (I still don’t buy the rings theory thing though)

But I didn’t give up lol! I’m a bit stubborn and it’s very hard to convince me in anything, so I decided to search for more context, more of their interactions, moreeee. Remember, the late October 2018, there were no swan lakes, RB, and even MMA18 hadn’t happened yet. 

This time I ended up watching content in more or less consistent way, and when I saw all of these scenes with affectionate JM and a cool badass i-don’t-care-about-anyone-i’m-a-manly-man-with-no-feelings-whatsoever JK, I just hysterically laughed. 

Homophobic Russia, remember? I recognized this. Growing up here being LGBT myself, taught me the same type behaviour during my high school days. When a girl I kinda liked but didn’t what to admit it to myself was nice to me or (oh god) flirted with me, I did something similar. It’s like a huge panic mode. Being an introvert doesn’t help either. The funniest thing is that you may not entirely realise what exactly is going on in terms of your own feelings, especially at that age (16-18ish). In my personal case, I thought I liked her but as a friend, only later to realise that well not as a friend oops :DDD The second thing (already not so funny) is that you actually consciously or unconsciously try to avoid the subject as much as possible, as long as possible and pretend that nothing is going on. We’re just bros. Stop doing this stupid gayish thing and don’t look at me like that, you’re annoying. If you ever do this again I (gently) kick you. I’m straighter than a straight line in my math textbook. IDK, but probably that’s your brain is somehow trying to protect you. Again, in my case&position I knew that the consequences for any non-straight person being outed would be bad (TW not to the point of being killed bad, but to the point of being excluded from a big part of society). So for me it was a mixture of the internalized homophobia + lack of self reflection + just being a bit emotionally slow + very! straight community around. Shit happens, I was a teenager and made my share of mistakes, but that experience helps me to recognize the same pattern of behaviour up to this day.   

So coming back to KM, because the post is already waaay too long and I just ramble. It’s been 2+ years for me being a part of this fandom, and what can I say... Things become more intense and eventful with every year passing by ;) Funny how I felt that vibe from the 2016 dance practice video. Seeing the Black Swan performance a week ago almost had me choked, no joking. They are amazing.

                                                    Pure Art

However, and I would like to emphasize that, I do not incline that KM are 100% romantically involved and/or gay or whatever. I tend to treat people with respect and not to make too much assumptions about their private life. That’s not my business. However, I’m also not a fan of heteronormativity, so I’m just sitting here and observe everything that’s going on putting some distance and not forgetting being generally polite and critical thinking. But if they are just straightest besties please give them an Oscar before Grammy

Anyways, I hope this blog won’t kick the bucket from the very start and I will post something every now and then. You can always ask me questions about some BTS/Jikook related stuff or something about Russia and a Russian view on mass culture topics, since I’m pretty sure some of you have very stereotypical view of what is going on here :) However, do note that I’ve never been to America or Europe, therefore I may not be aware of something verrrry obvious to you or just have a completely different experience. 

P.S.  And yeah, I’m used to say Jikook, since it’s the name which is used much more frequently in Russian.  i like it better and what will u do haha

#jikook #kookmin #what am i even doing here #i'm gonna regret this #long post

[theroguequeenaniki]

Questions 2009 -> 2021

This is from my Facebook. It popped up on my memories page thing. I originally answered this in 2009 when I was 15, it’s now 2021 & and I am 27, so I’m gonna do it again. Leaving the original answers. Original answers will be italicized. Commentary on the original answers in parentheses & crossed out? Lol. (I’m not gonna tag anyone, but, like, I guess if you want to answer these random questions from Facebook 12 years ago, go ahead lol) 

Questions

Can you fill this out without lying? You've been tagged, so now you need to answer all the questions HONESTLY. At the end, choose people to tag. Don't forget to tag me so I can see your answers! To do this, copy this entire message, then go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, delete my answers, and type yours. Easy! Next, tag people that you think may enjoy this (in the right hand corner of the app). Click publish (at the bottom). Have fun! :) 1.What was the last thing you put in your mouth? My cup with my Big Red in it The straw to my Kate Spade tumbler to drink my HEB Cola Lol.

2.Where was your profile picture taken? I got it off the internet. it's a random anime girl. My bedroom. 3.Can you play Guitar Hero? Never played it. Probably wouldn't be good at it. Not to good at video games. But I am good at Mario Cart, both 64 and the Wii. plus I'm good at some Sonic games. Still never played it. Idk if I’m any good at Mario Cart or the Sonic games anymore, I haven’t played either in years lol

4.Name someone who made you laugh today? Doctor Who TikTok. My cats.

5.How late did you stay up last night and why? Umm, probably about 10:00 cause it took me forevor to get into bed. Uh..Past 4am. Lol. B/c my sleep schedule is fucked. I was in bed by 3am though, but I was playing games & watching TikToks on my phone. Lol.

6.If you could move somewhere else, would you? Yes. I'd move to either New York or Sweden. I don’t know. Part of me says yes. But part of me says no..b/c even though Texas has it’s faults (a LOT of them), I cannot imagine living anywhere else long-term..

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? HAHA. Yeah right. I've never even been kissed! Still nope. I have been kissed though. He just didn’t kiss me under the fireworks the one NYE we spent together...

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you? Um, I think R, but D might also. D is accross Stasney from me and R is a couple blocks down (I don’t talk to these people much anymore & I’m not going to share their names on Tumblr) Uh. I think Maybe Raven? B/c they’re the only one who lives in the same city still. But, Sarah might technically be closer distance wise? Hold on. Ok, yeah, Sarah’s closer, even though she doesn’t live in this city anymore.

9. Do you believe exes can be friends? It all depends on the situation.(I totally stold M's answer but it's true) (I don’t talk to this person anymore & I’m not gonna share their name on Tumblr) I mean, yeah. Two of my best friends are each others exes and they’re still friends. I haven’t stayed friend with my ex, but, uh, he ghosted me so? Lol.

10. How do you feel about Dr. Pepper? I love it. I still love it. Lol.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? I can't remember. I don't think it was that long ago, I had a light cry on Saturday, but I don't remember the last time I cried really hard. When we got back from our trip in July. Had a full on breakdown that night. Overheated all weekend. Overwhelmed. Anxiety. It was not a very good vacation..I cry a lot though.

12. Who took your profile picture? I got it off of google. I did. 

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Umm, either myself, or one of my family members. Aside from myself. I think my dad, on his phone, b/c there was a cicada on his shoulder and he wanted to ask the family group chat if he could keep it. Lol. I take a LOT of pictures of cats though. Lol.

14. Was yesterday better than today? Hail yes! To much drama today! And I couldn't avoid it cause I was in the middle of it! (Oof, what drama was 15 yo Linda dealing with that she couldn’t avoid? Lol. I mean, I guess, Sophomore year was a bit full of drama lol) Anyway, I mean, they were pretty much the same. One wasn’t better than the other. One wasn’t worse than the other.

15. Can you live a day without TV? yeah. Now Music there is something I can't live without! Yep, Do it almost everyday. Sentiments about music remain the same. Lol.

16. Are you upset about anything? Yes. I'm annoyed about something and it's making me upset. (I assume this has something to do with the the drama mentioned earlier lol) Always. Anxiety & depression are a bitch. My rooms a mess & I can’t get myself to clean it. My shelves are still a mess.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? yeah. though i havent really had one yet. I mean, yeah. Even though I haven’t had one last, aside from friendships, but they’re worth it. 

18. Are you a bad influence? I hope not. If so, let me know.(again I took M's answer but it's true) Probably. Idk. Lol.

19. Night out or night in? Depends on what's going on and how I feel about it. Night in usually. I do like going out sometimes, but, like, to dinner. Maybe a movie or a show. But, you know, we’ve been in a panini press, the only thing I’ve been comfortable doing is going to dinner (fully vaxxed & masked). But I also prefer staying home anyway. (Like I usually just go to dinner with my family lol)

20. What items could you not go without during the day? my computer. my book. my journal and a pen. My phone. My journal (b/c I write in it every night, as a diary, 14yo Linda wrote stories). Uh. I didn’t take food or drinks into account in the og, so I won’t in those. But, yeah. My phone & journal. I can go a day without my laptop if I need to. (Went the whole trip in July without pulling it out, though maybe that’s not a good example since my anxiety on that trip was so high..) I want to say a book, but I’ve been in a massive reading slump so...I wish I read as much as 15yo Linda did..

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? I don't remember. I think it was myself.(if you want to know, ask me in person) I honestly don’t know. I don’t remember the last time I was in a hospital. 

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? "Mrbobbybones:  wish ted would finally meet their mother already. geez. get to it. However, I see myself in that character more and more each episode." yeah. That's what it says. It's from Twitter. (Huh? and I can’t even go check b/c my inbox doesn’t go back to 2009 on Twitter?? (I haven’t had my account that long) Wait wait wait just remembered I used to get tweets to my phone as text messages lol)

Facebook messenger: “ Cool” From our group chat. Lol.

From actual text messages on my phone: “ heeey! Just put up the Tuesday PDS just for you  it’s a big one.” From Phillip Defranco’s text line Lol.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? I'm loving and hating it. but hey nobody gets out alive right? Uh..I mean. I’m alive. I have WiFi. Food. Family. I haven’t seen my friends in 2 years. (Minus Alex, b/c they were here in July to cat/house sit, but I saw them for like, one night..) There’s a lot that could be better. A lot that could be worse. 

24. Do you hate anyone? yes!!! Oof. I mean, kinda.

25. If we were to look in your Facebook Inbox, what would we find? some random conversations. most of my convos on her though have been in chat or through comments. Facebook Inbox is now Facebook Messenger. So you’ll find all my Facebook Messenger convos. Mostly our group chat. And side group chats for secret planning (birthdays & stuff). Plus other chats? Lol.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? I better! (excuse me miss 15yo Linda you absolutely could have passed a drug test you ALSO didn’t drink or smoke or take any drugs lol) Yeah. Absolutely. I don’t drink or smoke or take any drugs so, yeah? Lol.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? 

Yes. But I can't remember when... Yeah. Pretty sure. 

28. What song is stuck in your head? Gee by SNSD(Girls Generation) They're Korean. A few My Chemical Romance songs

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be? EDWARD CULLEN! Joke! lol. No I don't know. If it was Edward, I'd call the cops. whoever it is though better have an explaination or they are gonna get hit in the head with my Book of Shadows. (Maybe I wouldn’t mind Edward at my window though? Lol.) Uh. My friends? Lol. Idk if I want anyone knocking on my window at 2am.

30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50? I don't know....... Uh. No? Idk. Most likely not gonna happen. 

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow? I can't think of anything right now... Eat. Should probably clean my room.

32. Do you think too much or too little? Way to much! lol. Way way way too much

33. Do you smile a lot? i try to. I think I do. I get told that alot in Theater...

I think so

#questions #throwback #is this a get to know me #idk

[weaktoad]

Everyone strap in for the ride because, spoiler if you haven’t seen my latest post on instagram, I’m pissed. The post in question was written by pjo-hoo-toa-freakazoid about Percy being bisexual/biromantic (a very common head canon) but a few people in the comments got upset about this, arguing that he’s straight. From their point of view, he’s straight because he’s in a relationship with Annabeth.

First off, I want to point out that there is no canon statement in the books or by Rick himself that Percy is straight (if there is, I’ve missed it and someone can dm it to me, but I’m 99% about this). Therefore, any head canon about his sexuality is fair game, excluding gay because he’s dating Annabeth and has very clearly shown interest in girls. I will respect head canons about him being straight, but I will not stand for people shitting on head canons of him being part of the LGBTQIA+ community. I will say this time and time again: straight is not the default.

One of the main points for the argument that Percy is bi is that he has called a few men attractive, which shows a little bit of interest in them. Nowhere does he explicitly say that he wouldn’t date a man. Nowhere does he explicitly say that he would date a man. Which is why this is a head canon and it’s reasonable to speculate that he could be bi, pan, or any other sexuality as long as it includes attraction to women. Just because he is in a relationship with a girl doesn’t mean that he can’t be bi, that’s very plainly biphobia to say that he has to be straight. Someone can still be bi even if they’re dating the opposite sex and it wouldn’t mean that they’re gay if they were in a relationship with the same sex. This is common stigmatization against bi people and it’s disgusting.

As a counter argument, Percy’s sexuality was compared to Nico being gay which a different situation. They had said that if someone argued that Nico was straight or bi we would “have a fit.” Which is true but for different reasons. For one thing, Nico’s sexuality has been very specifically stated and canonized that he’s gay, both in the story and by Rick himself (an easy example is the popular “honey he gay” meme that Rick made on his Twitter). Nico has also expressed that he’s not attracted to women (his distaste to the idea that people thought he liked Annabeth). This argument is problematic (read: homophobic) because LGBTQIA+ have been hated on for not being cishet since forever and it keeps happening. That’s why we would “have a fit.” Because it hurts to see that when many of us have had that same hate thrown at ourselves for being part of the LGBTQIA+ community. Trying to say that this is the same level as having a head canon that Percy isn’t straight is the same is incredibly insensitive. Once again, I can respect someone’s head canon that Percy is straight. In return, I hope that you can respect our head canon that he’s bi. But you have to remember that he doesn’t have a canon sexuality.

However, since I’m writing this, it’s clear that people are having trouble respecting this head canon. The main thing that I want to point out is that if you’re annoyed at people finding comfort in the idea that Percy could be bi, you’re homophobic. There is no hate on straight people when using this head canon. In fact, if anyone were to hate on someone for having the head canon that Percy is straight, I would be just as mad. I will not condone any sort of behavior like this, especially on my page. I’m not here to spread hate, I’m here to share our love for the series and the characters, no matter what their sexuality is. Having that said, if you’re “tired” of seeing people speculate and have head canons that defies “the norm” (flashback to my instagram posts about Percy being BIPOC and the rant I made then jfc), then you’re the one who’s problematic, not us. Maybe we read into things to much, but we’re enjoying ourselves. What’s wrong with that? What’s wrong with trying to see ourselves in the stories we love? There’s such a lack of representation in media (especially decent ones) and when we see hints of it, of course we’re going to take it and run with it. We’re deprived of seeing ourselves as the main character and heroes, not just a background character that appears for .1 seconds that Disney can pay themselves on the back for adding.

On the other hand, it’s becoming easier for queer creators to create LGBTQI+ characters and we’re finally getting some representation. But because of this, homophobes are getting annoyed and saying things like “suddenly everyone is gay.” Like, no lol. Even if there were some piece of media that every character was queer, saying it’s unrealistic, that’s bullshit. You don’t get to say that when for decades we’ve had to sit through media where every person is straight. Where every relationship is only with the opposite sex. We’ve sat through it so obviously you should be able to do the same. When you say that we already have plenty of characters in the riordanverse that are part of the LGBTQIA+ community, we can easily feel the same way.

Another thing I want to bring attention to is the comment that Percy is straight because he doesn’t say that he’s straight. AKA he doesn’t have to say it because straight people don’t have to announce their sexuality. Because it’s assumed to be the default. So here we go again: straight is not the default. One of our goals in the LGBTQIA+ is to make sure that’s known, because coming out is one of the hardest things we’ll ever experience, something that some of us don’t want to experience. Let me offer you this thought: bi or pan should be the default. Why? Let’s use food as an example: on the table in front of you, there’s a cake and a pie. Some people would rather have the former, some would rather the latter, some don’t care, some like neither, some like both, or maybe they like both but have a preference on which they’ll eat. However, maybe you’ve never had either before. You don’t know if you’ll like it or not unless you try it. Or, maybe you’ve never had cake but you don’t care for it because you like pie too much to not choose it. But if you’ve never had it, it’s unfair to assume that you only like cake because it’s the most common thing. Maybe the people who like pie aren’t speaking up because they’re yelled at for liking it and not liking cake or liking both. It’s the same with sexuality. It’s easier to start off with weighing all your options before you start to cross them off.

No one in the riordanverse is “obviously straight” in canon. There are few characters in the riordanverse that exclusively like the same sex in canon. We are allowed to have head canons. Be respectful.

This was something I especially didn’t want to see during pride month but of course I can’t live my life without seeing hate on the LGBTQIA+ community. If you’re straight, you’re able to avoid the hate that we rarely live without. This is why we have pride month. This is why we have pride month. This is why we have pride month.

That said, happy pride month! I give all my love to everyone and I hope you know you’re valid. Bi people, I hope you know this especially. Biphobia is rampant even in the LGBTQIA+ community, please stay safe, lovelies. Love yourself and love loving other people. I will do my best to create a safe community and promote kindness. After all, that’s why I made this account, to share the love we have for the Percy Jackson series and make everyone smile.

#percy jackson #Percy Jackson and the Olympians #heroes of olympus #pjo #nico di angelo #gay #pride #pride month #bi #bisexual #rick riordan #riordanverse #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia

[whatiwillsay]

Tayliz Timeline!

December 2006: Taylor meets Liz at a meet and greet in San Bernadino

2/5/2008: Taylor runs into Liz again on Dance War and diaries about it

4/12/2009: Liz joins Taylor’s band

5/7/2009: Taylor posts a story on MySpace that implies her and Liz have been sharing a room together

5/29/2009: Taylor posts another cute story on MySpace that implies her and Liz just got dinner together when it took place:

9/6/2009: Liz gets sick. Taylor writes a giant MySpace post about how much she misses her:

12/3/2009: Liz congratulates Taylor on her Grammy noms on Twitter

12/13/2009: Taylor turns 20, her backup dancer Brandon comes out at her party, Liz tweet HBD to her

1/19/2010: Liz and Taylor go to a housewarming party together

2/22/2010: Taylor makes a MySpace post about how much fun her and Liz have

3/30/2010: Liz tweets at Taylor thanking her for cancelling her plans just in case she’d call (cam’s note - lmao)

4/3/2010: Liz tweets at Taylor with an inside joke about the quick-change dressing room in Kansas City.

July 2010: Taylor moves into an apartment in Nashville and is on her own for the first time, she reportedly has to call Liz in order to fall asleep at night

9/8/2010: Liz and Taylor go to a wedding together and take photos with Andrea:

9/22/2010: Taylor posts cute girlfriend pictures of Liz on MySpace:

11/22/2010: “Love you Tay”

11/29/2010: Liz and Taylor hang out, Liz tweets about it

12/13/2010: Taylor turns 21. Liz wishes her HBD on Twitter and says she’s changed her life.

12/29/2010: Taylor and Liz papped together walking around Nashville:

3/19/2011: Taylor cuts Liz’s hair, Liz tweets about it. Later that day, Taylor and Liz go to a Katy Perry concert with Grant Mickelson and Caitlin Bird. (cam’s note - later Taylor goes on Leno on April 5th 2011 and talks about cutting Liz’s hair - says she looks like a hipster.)

BONUS: Liz says her favorite Katy Perry song is Thinking of You

4/23/2011: Liz and Taylor get coffee. Liz tweets about it. (cam’s note - i checked this is not a Wednesday)

4/24/2011: Taylor sends Liz an Easter card.

4/27/2011: Liz and Taylor hang out, talk about Skittles.

5/19/2011: Taylor cooks Liz dinner. 

5/28/2011: Thirst tweet:

8/15-8/18/2011: Taylor goes to South Carolina on vacation with her band (including Liz). It’s very gay. Liz tweets this, which is also very gay (who wants to bet Liz and Taylor were sharing?)

9/7/2011: Taylor writes Red, according to the Lover Diaries

11/8/2011: Liz and Taylor have a “soul feeding time” together:

Late 2011: Taylor writes IKYWT (don’t think this is about Liz just in here for context) (cam’s note - are we sure?  this seems close to the end of their real main friendship...liz seems to be a bit of a bad girl, maybe she was trouble)

1/1/2012: Liz tweets about “dancing around the kitchen” with Taylor (ATW was already written so I think she might just be referencing it…)

3/4/2012: Taylor tweets about Liz annoying her with Corn Nuts.

Things quiet down significantly from here as Swiftgron ramps up. Then in September:

9/20/2012: Liz spends quality time with Claire and Taylor.

11/8/2012: Liz posts a song on YouTube called “Never Know” that might be about Taylor>> “It’s crazy how life goes on / And then I catch myself singing your song / And wonder if you think about me / I guess we’ll never know”

(cam’s note - how did she get away with “I catch myself singing you’re song”?)

Liz is not on the Red tour. Either she was not invited back or chose to leave to pursue her own career.

Liz does not wish Taylor Happy Birthday in 2012 (the only year she misses around this stretch).

They have no interactions in 2013 beyond Liz wishing her Happy Birthday. That pattern continues in 2014 UNTIL Claire posts a TBT to the South Carolina trip in October 2014 and Liz responds to it. From there, Liz has tweeted Taylor on and off for a while (including about every birthday) and seems to be on good terms with her. So maybe things ended badly when Taylor got with Dianna? I don’t know.

In December 2014, Liz got engaged to producer Bryan Brown. As of today, that engagement seems to be over, but considering she was supposed to debut in 2015 (pushed back to 2017) that might’ve been a bearding thing.

In April 2018, she released a song called Don’t LV U Anymore which has these lyrics: “I don’t steal your chapstick anymore / Don’t wake up to your kiss anymore / And I don’t have a washer and dryer full of guitar picks anymore / ‘Cause you don’t come over to my place anymore / … / I don’t love you anymore / I don’t love you anymore / I don’t love you anymore / But I don’t love you any less”

The chorus pretty much sums up what the state of their relationship seems to be post-2014. 

Other songs that might be about Taylor include:

So Easy

Dammit - Jana Kramer (written by Liz) Talks about a lover playing guitar in the kitchen.

STFU and Hold Me – about a “rocky and volatile” relationship. Liz paints herself as a cheater in the MV and wears Red throughout the whole thing. The lyric “it started with a bang, went all in” is similar to Holy Ground’s “took off faster than a green light go.” Seems very similar to the relationships described in Red.

submission ⬆️⬆️⬆️

paging @tayliz​ some stuff for you to work with here!  

i put some things that stood out to me in bold and added pictures to your refeences along with a few other notes and tweets

i am pretty convinced of tiz(or are we going with tayliz?) at this point especially with her dissapearing right wen swiftgron ramps up in spring 2012 

#tayliz #tiz #gaylor swift #tiz timeline #submission

[debbiechanclub]

Best Two Out of Three, Part 15

Alright friends. Shit’s about to get real.

Some notes/warnings before this part. @what-does-mine-say and I have decided to lean into everything going on with Hangman in AEW right now, because frankly, it works perfectly with our plot - and I go pretty hard into here. Also, this part marks the start of a slippery slope for Alex and she probably won’t make the best decisions. But she’s in a really tough spot, okay? *cries*

Enjoy...?

Best Two Out of Three

Part: 15/26

Pairing: Kenny Omega x OFC x Cash Wheeler and Adam Page x OFC

Warnings: ANGST, some language

Word Count: 4k

Catch up on previous parts here.

“Is that a hickey?”

Alex slapped a hand to her neck, her entire face burning bright red at the wide-eyed look on Britt’s face. “Jesus, Britt,” she glared as she stood from her seat in hair and makeup. “Just put me on blast.”

“Um, it’s right there for everyone to see,” she returned. “What, you didn’t want them to cover it up?”

Alex just gave her a look as she pulled her hair over to the left side of her neck, concealing the love bite from view. To be honest, she’d forgotten it was there. When she’d told Cash to make her his last night, he’d taken it a bit literally. Not that she’d minded; he’d left his mark elsewhere, too. Britt just couldn’t see it.

“Leave her alone,” Callie defended as she sat for her makeup. “Alex and Cash are in looooveee.”

Alex froze at her sing-song teasing. “Stop,” she muttered as she leaned against the wall and looked down at her phone, busying herself with Twitter. The last thing she wanted to think about right now was the “L” word.

“What?” Callie innocently asked. “I’m happy for you! I miss the days when Adam and I couldn’t keep our hands off each other.”

“Uh oh. Trouble in paradise?” Britt asked.

Alex and Callie both shot her a look for that one. “No,” Callie returned. “He’s just been… I don’t know. Distracted the last few weeks.”

“Well that fight last night between his tag partner and his new BFF probably didn’t help,” Britt remarked. “I can’t wait to see how he and Kenny manage to defend their titles after that.”

Alex and Callie exchanged a silent glance. Somehow, word had gotten around about Kenny and Cash’s fist fight at the hotel bar the night before; and Alex just knew everyone assumed it was about her. She’d felt it in the judgmental eyes and whispers that had followed her all day. It was enough to send a person into hiding.

“They’ll be fine,” Callie insisted with a roll of her eyes. But it seemed like she was trying to convince herself more than Britt. She nudged her chin at Alex in effort to change the subject. “Don’t Best Friends have a match tonight?”

“Yeah,” Alex confirmed. “Them and Jurassic Express versus the Inner Circle. Actually, I should probably head up to Gorilla; we’re on first.”

She pushed herself from the wall; but she didn’t go anywhere. Her eyes had connected with Matt Jackson’s as he rounded the corner—and he was making a beeline right for her.

“Can I talk you?” he asked. No, not asked—told. It caught Alex completely off-guard.

“Yeah…” she hesitantly returned. “Sure.”

He didn’t even wait for her to finish speaking before he turned and marched back down the hall from where he’d come, giving her no choice but to follow. She shot Callie an annoyed look before hurrying after him. There was only one reason Matt would want to talk to her, and his named rhymed with “Lenny.”

He led her around another corner and down a deserted hallway, making sure they were well out of earshot of anyone. He didn’t waste any time. “Alright, I’m just gonna cut to the chase,” he said as he whirled around to face her. “You need to put Kenny out of his misery.”

Alex’s brow lowered. “Excuse me?”

Matt let out a huff and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. It seemed like he’d decided to have this confrontation on a whim and didn’t really have his thoughts in order. “He’s in love with you, Alex,” he said. “I know you know that; he told me and Nick about what happened last week. And after what happened last night, I’m sure you also know that he’s still holding onto hope that you two have a chance. So please… just tell him it’s over so he can move on.”

Alex stood there in front of him like a deer in headlights. She hadn’t expected him to say that; not any of it. And she certainly hadn’t expected the hollow way it made her feel.

“Oh my God,” Matt let out another breath as he ran a hand over his face. “Is there still a chance?”

“What?” she returned. “I’m with Cash, Matt.”

“Are you sure? Because you didn’t look sure a second ago.”

Alex bit down on her jaw. She didn’t need this from Matt Jackson, of all people. “Well, thanks for this little judgment detour, but I have a match I need to get to.”

She turned to leave—but then Matt said something that made her stop. “He was planning on making it up to you, you know.”

She looked back at him, more confused than anything. “What?”

Matt put his hands on his hips. It almost looked like he regretted opening his mouth, but it was too late now. He had to tell her. “Kenny felt terrible about that night he didn’t get back to the hotel room until one in the morning,” he said. “And then on top of it he was busy that entire weekend… he told me he could barely talk to you because he was so upset with himself. So he planned out a whole night to make it up to you the next week. He made reservations at some fancy restaurant; I think he bought you something, I don’t know. He wanted it to be a surprise. But then the very day he was gonna do all that, you told him you had feelings for Cash.”

With every word that came out of Matt’s mouth, Alex’s heart sunk deeper and deeper into the pit of her stomach. She felt sick. If what Matt said was true, then it cast that weekend nearly two months ago in a whole new terrible light. While she’d been cuddling in front of a fire with Cash, telling him she didn’t know what she and Kenny were, asking him to share a bed with her, Kenny had been thinking only of her. She’d thought he’d just been too busy to make time for her, when in reality he’d been planning to prove to her how much he cared; how much he wanted to change for her, just like he’d said. And she hadn’t given him a chance to prove it. She’d shot his chance dead in the water. She was absolutely disgusted with herself.

Matt’s voice cut through her thoughts. “I’m sorry. But I had to tell you because I know Kenny won’t.”

Alex didn’t say anything in response. She didn’t even look at Matt before she turned on her heel and left, walking swiftly through the halls to Gorilla, in a daze. Everyone else booked for the tag match was already there when she arrived, milling around, waiting for the show to get underway. Trent spotted her the same time she did him. “There you are,” he said. “Did you get lo—”

He didn’t finish his sentence. Alex had walked right up to him, wrapped her arms around his middle, and hugged herself tight against his chest.

Everyone around turned to look. Trent went stiff, unsure what to do. “Okay, Alex,” he said. “I’m a little confused, but I’m not gonna stop it if this is what you want.”

“Trent,” she breathed. “Please. I just need a hug from my friend right now.”

He must have heard the emotion in her voice, because she felt him relax after she said that. He wrapped his arms around her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” she said.

There was a thoughtful pause. “Are you good to come out there with us?”

She didn’t answer right away. “I think so,” she decided.

“What the hell is this?” Alex suddenly heard Chuck proclaim. “I know you’re not leaving me out of a Best Friends hug right now.”

She felt Trent pick up one of his arms and make a motion as if he was cutting his hand across his throat, signaling to Chuck that now wasn’t the time for jokes. There was another pause. And then Chuck asked, “Are you okay, Alex?”

No, she thought. But she said, “I just need a minute.”

Trent rested his chin on top of her head. And then she heard James say, “Who do we have to murder?”

Me, Alex thought. But before she could say anything, Best Friends’ music started up.

Trent pulled back and looked down at her. “Are you sure you’re good?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Okay.” He squeezed her shoulders and nodded toward the entrance to the babyface tunnel. “Well let’s go, then. We have some Inner Circle ass to beat.”

They all made their way to the tunnel. Chuck wrapped an arm around Alex’s shoulders as they walked. “Would it make you feel better if I held Sammy down so you could hit him?”

She let out a small laugh. “Probably.”

He nodded. “Well then one knuckle sandwich coming right up.”

They disappeared into the tunnel. Alex took a deep breath and followed Trent, Orange, and Chuck out onto the stage, plastering on her game face. She didn’t have to worry about crying. She was far too numb.

* * * * * * * * * *

The silence that filled The Elite’s dressing room was almost physically painful. Kenny sat at one end and Adam the other, both dressed and ready for their tag team title defense against Dark Order. Neither of them had said so much as two words to each other since the night before, when they’d had a verbal altercation of their own not long after Kenny’s physical one with Cash.

Callie had tried to tell Adam to just leave Kenny alone to cool off, but he couldn’t. He felt responsible for the fight. He’d been the one to call Kenny over like a drunken idiot. He’d been the one to drive Alex to Cash, unwittingly breaking Kenny’s heart and putting Alex between them. And so even though he hadn’t swung a single punch that night, he felt like he’d stabbed Kenny in the back, repeatedly—and that was ten times worse.

So he’d marched down to Kenny’s hotel room, just a few doors away, still in his suit and tie. Still buzzing from the alcohol he’d consumed all night. He’d knocked on the door before he could think better of it. When Kenny answered, he looked disappointed. Like he was hoping it had been someone—anyone—else knocking at his door.

“What do you want?” he sighed.

Adam frowned. He didn’t blame Kenny for not wanting to talk to him. “I wanted to come see if you were alright,” he said. He glanced at his left eye. There was already a welt underneath it. “Cash got you pretty good.”

“And I returned the favor,” Kenny clipped.

Adam looked away, running a hand through his already mussed hair. He hadn’t come prepared with anything to say, so he just said the first thing that came to mind. “I didn’t know Cash would act like that when I called you over. And I wasn’t trying to rub tonight in your face, I swear.”

Kenny laughed wryly to himself. “Okay, Adam.”

His brow lowered. “I wasn’t,” he firmly returned. “Do you seriously think I would do that?”

“Actually yeah, I do,” Kenny nodded. “And you wanna know why? Because you knew exactly what you were doing when you invited FTR to that cookout with Alex. It wasn’t just about getting her to be friends with Callie. Admit it.”

Guilt rose up Adam’s throat like bile. He’d done far more than just invite FTR to the same cookout as Alex. But couldn’t admit to the things he’d said to her. He just couldn’t. “I’m sorry,” he said. “But I didn’t know you loved her, man.”

“What difference does that make?” Kenny shot. “You shouldn’t have done it regardless!”

“Well I thought I was doing what was best for her, alright?” Adam yelled back.

Kenny stared back at him, a mixture of shock and hurt in his eyes. But it was gone as soon as it arrived. He let out another laugh. “You know what? Fuck you, Adam. You’re not sorry. You’re just drunk and guilty.”

And with that he’d slammed the door in Adam’s face, leaving him standing alone in the hall. Now they sat across the locker room from each other, an invisible gulf between them.

Eventually, Adam had to say something. “Look, let’s just put last night behind us for this match, alright? We need to be on the same page if we’re gonna beat Dark Order.”

Kenny cast him a look. “When have we ever been on the same page?”

Adam bit down on his jaw. In a different tone of voice, that could have been a joke. But Kenny clearly wasn’t joking. “Kenny, I’m willing to work with you tonight so we don’t lose our championships. Are you?”

Kenny abruptly stood from his seat and grabbed his AEW World Tag Team Championship. “Yeah, I am. Because this?” he held up the title. “This is just business. Nothing else.” And he walked out the door, making it crystal clear to Adam exactly where he stood.

* * * * * * * * * *

“I don’t know about y’all, but I’ve had a fantastic two days,” Cash announced as Alex walked with him and Dax toward Gorilla for their Dark match against Brandon Cutler and Peter Avalon. “I wined and dined my girl; my best friend and I officially signed our AEW contracts, with guarantees for tag ropes and Tag Team Appreciate Night; and now we get to go kick some ass.”

“Everything’s coming up FTR,” Dax said.

“Everything is coming up FTR,” Cash agreed.

Alex did her best to smile at Cash as he squeezed her hand, her fingers interlaced with his. He’d been in a good mood all day; it was like he’d already forgotten about the fight with Kenny. She wished she could say the same.

They arrived at Gorilla, but instead of walking toward the ring entrance with Dax, Cash slowed to a stop. He pulled Alex against him. “Are you gonna watch back here?”

She nodded. “Yeah. I feel like if I went out there it would just take away from you guys. You know… because of last night.”

He frowned at her. Not a sad frown, but an apologetic one. “I know, sweetheart. I know everyone knows about the fight. I’m sorry.”

Alex shook her head. She reached up and gently brushed her fingertips through his hair. “You apologized last night,” she said. “Let’s move forward.”

Cash smiled at her, true and warm, and Alex’s stomach fluttered. His smile always made her melt.

Suddenly, someone nearby shouted that they were on in sixty seconds. Cash glanced toward Gorilla. “Shit—I gotta go.” He gave her a kiss, quick and hard. “I’ll see you after.”

Alex watched as he hurried off. She missed him almost as soon as he was gone, but she turned and started down the hall to watch FTR’s match with Callie in the lounge. At least, she thought she’d been going to the lounge. It wasn’t until she saw The Elite’s locker room that she realized she’d gone in the complete opposite direction.

She stood there, staring at the door. Her conversation with Matt earlier in the day replayed in her head. Her legs carried her forward; and the next thing she knew, she was knocking.

A voice called from inside. “Yeah?” Alex’s pulse raced. That was Kenny’s voice. Before she could think about it, she pushed open the door and walked in. Kenny froze when he saw her. He’d obviously just gotten out of the shower. Heat rose in Alex’s cheeks as she watched tiny water droplets drip from his damp curls and roll down his bare chest. Thank God he was wearing shorts.

“Hey,” he said.

She had to swallow a lump in her throat before she could speak. “Hi.” Now that she was in front him, she didn’t know what the hell to do. She hadn’t intended to come in here; it had just happened, like her subconscious had taken her there of its own accord. And then her tongue took over. “Um, I know this is probably a bad time. But… can we talk?”

He seemed surprised at the request. But he nodded. “Yeah. It’s not a bad a time.”

Alex chewed her lip as he dug out a tank top from his suitcase and pulled it over his head. She crossed the room and sat down in a chair, far too nervous to stand. Her legs were literally shaking. Kenny sat down next to her; the familiar scent of his body wash filled her nose. Her stomach fluttered.

“What’s up?” he asked.

The genuineness of his tone killed her. She looked back at him, and her gaze couldn’t help but drift to the purple bruise underneath his left eye. “I’m sorry about last night,” she said.

He shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”

She looked down at her hands, wringing them in her lap. “I still feel responsible.”

“Don’t,” he insisted. “Really. I let Cash get to me and I shouldn’t have.”

“He shouldn’t have acted the way he did,” she returned, almost underneath her breath.

A corner of Kenny’s mouth quirked up. “Well, I’m not blaming you for him acting like an asshole.”

Alex stole a glance at him. His eyes were so sincere that she had to look away again. She’d get lost in those blue pools if she didn’t. “I feel terrible about the way he acted,” she admitted. And then she added, before she could stop herself, “And I feel even more worse about it now that I know you planned a night just like that for me.”

She looked at him again—she had to see his reaction. His expression was one of realization. “Did Matt tell you?”

She nodded. And then it all came out. “He asked to talk to me before the show started. He told me that after that night you didn’t come back to the hotel room until one in the morning you planned a night to make it up to me. But it never happened because I’m a fucking asshole who didn’t give you a chance.”

Emotion surged up through her and her eyes welled with tears, falling and rolling silently down her cheeks as she stared back at him. And then she realized: it was her guilt that had brought her in here. It had carried her away like a riptide, and she was just fighting to breathe.

Kenny frowned at her. “Alex, please don’t cry. I hate seeing you cry.”

He dared to reach out and brushed her tears away with his thumb. She didn’t pull away. Instead, she leaned into his touch. “Why didn’t you tell me about it?” she asked.

“Because I was too shocked by what you’d said,” he gently explained. “It felt like you’d already made up your mind. It felt like there was nothing I could do that would make a difference.”

Alex’s heart broke all over again when she heard that. “It would have made a difference,” she said, her voice breaking. “We could still be together, Kenny.”

Kenny anticipated what was coming, and he didn’t think twice before pulling her into him. Alex buried her face in his neck, clinging to his shirt as her shoulders shook and he held her tight. She’d wondered for weeks, deep in the back of her mind, if she and Kenny would still be together if only she hadn’t been so quick to put up her walls. And now that he’d said that, it all but confirmed her worst fears.

“I wish I could go back in time and re-do that day,” Kenny said. “But I can’t. The only thing I can do is try to fix it now.”

He pulled back and looked deep into her eyes. Alex’s breath hitched in her throat as he reached up and wiped her tears away again, cupping her face in his hand, still holding her close. The air was magnetic between them. If he was going to kiss her, she wasn’t sure she would stop it.

“Do you remember when we were in Daytona Beach for Fyter Fest last year and we went down to the boardwalk?” he asked.

Alex gave him a watery smile. That had been one of their first “dates” after they’d first gotten involved. It was one of her favorite memories. But it felt bittersweet now. “Yeah. We went to that arcade and you kicked my ass at absolutely everything. Even air hockey.”

“You were so mad,” he smirked.

“I’m competitive.”

His grin grew wider. “And then we went in that photobooth, and you didn’t even want to smile you were so annoyed with me. But then I kissed you.”

Her heart skipped a beat. “And then I didn’t want to stop kissing you.”

He brushed another tear away as it fell. “I still have those pictures,” he said. “And after that night I didn’t come back to the hotel room until late, I went home and dug them out. And as I was looking at them… that’s when I realized I loved you.”

He sat back and stood up. Alex watched as he walked across the room back to his suitcase and unzipped the interior pocket. He pulled out a small white box and walked back over to her, retaking his seat. He looked down at the box in his hands. Alex watched him.

“I was planning on giving this to you at dinner on that night Matt told you about. I had this whole spiel prepared about how I knew I’d messed up and hurt you, but I was committed to you now. And I was scared shitless about it but… I was going to tell you I loved you. That I would do everything I could to make sure you knew that and never doubted it. But then that night never happened. I’ve been carrying this around with me ever since,” he said with a gesture of the box. “I just never bothered to take it out of my suitcase; I didn’t want to even think about it after you got together with Cash. But I want you to have it.”

He held out the box to her. Alex’s hands trembled as she took it. She worked open the lid. A round, antique gold-colored locket on a long chain sat on a cotton cushion inside. She picked it up and pulled it open. Her heart swelled in her chest and she brought a hand to her mouth. Inside was the picture of them kissing in the photobooth that day at the boardwalk arcade.

She looked back up at Kenny, tears freely falling again. There was love in his eyes as he gazed back at her. Deep. Real. “I don’t know what happens from here,” he said. “You could still choose him, and I’ll just have to live with it. But I love you, Alex. And I promise—”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence—Alex pulled him forward and crashed her lips against his. Kenny didn’t hesitate for a second; he wrapped his arms around her and tilted her head back, deepening the kiss. Craving her, claiming her as their mouths moved together—and, in that moment, Alex wanted him to.

But then there were voices in the hall. She returned to her senses and abruptly pulled away from him, her eyes wide with guilt. “Shit.” She looked back at Kenny, shocked at what they’d just done. But Kenny didn’t look shocked at all. His eyes shone with something else entirely.

“Alex,” he breathed, his voice heady with desire. It told Alex she needed to leave before they did anything more.

“I’m sorry,” she said, and she stood and hurried out the door, the locket still in her hand.

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[lovemesomesurveys]

an internet/social media survey. 1 - Are you one of those people who shares absolutely everything on social media? What do you think about those who do? I do tend to overshare in surveys and I share quite a bit on Twitter. I’m pretty quiet on my other social media sites, though, in terms of that. It only bugs me when people share something and then someone asks about it and they’re like, “I don’t want to share it on here” or “I don’t want to talk about it.” You just did, though? Why post about it then? Plus, my nosy ass wants to know haha. I see that all the time on Facebook.

2 - Does anyone in "real life" know that you take surveys? Would you be embarrassed if they found your blog? I don’t think so. Back in the Myspace days people knew cause I posted them there, but no one in “real life” follows me on here. I’m surprised I shared those back then cause I don’t want anyone to see them now. Although, I wasn’t as open back then in surveys. I took the more basic ones and didn’t elaborate like I do now.

3 - When you receive a text message, do you reply straight away or wait a little while instead? It depends.

4 - Who was the last person you blocked on social media? Did you have an argument that lead to that happening? I don’t recall. It was probably some spam account on here.

5 - Aside from Tumblr, what websites do you spend the most time on? I spend a lot of time on YouTube. 

6 - What was the first social media account you remember signing up for? Are you still a member of that particular website, if it even still exists? Ooh. I’ve had an online and social media presence for so long... like it was probably something that doesn’t even exist now.  I remember some teen sites I was on that I guess were like the social medias of the day. For example, there was this one website I remember called Kiwibox, where you could interact with other people, post stuff, and it shared like trending topics and whatnot that I was a member of in the early 2000s. It was pre-Myspace. I don’t think it even exists now, but if it did I’m sure my account was deleted long ago for being inactive. 

7 - How many social media accounts do you have now? Do you use them all regularly? If not, which ones do you think you update the most and why? I’m on all the common ones. I use them all, but I’m more active on some than others. Some I check regularly but rarely post. For instance, I’m super active on here and I post on Twitter quite a bit. I check Facebook a few times a day and “like” some stuff, but I very rarely post. I check Instagram and Snapchat, but not daily and I rarely post or even interact on there. I spend the least amount of time on those two.

8 - Are there are any popular apps/social media sites that you've never got into or signed up for? How come? Hmm. Like I said, I have all the main ones I think.

9 - Do you take surveys on any other website apart from Tumblr? Nope. 

10 - Before Tumblr existed, what kind of blogging site did you use (eg. LiveJournal, Xanga etc.). I had a Xanga and LJ account. 

11 - Is there anything you miss about websites like MySpace, or do you prefer social media the way it is now? The Myspace days were interesting that’s for sure. I miss the hype of changing up my page and adding stuff, picking my profile song, rearranging my top 8, changing my display name, follow forever trains, comment 4 comments... haha what a ride.

12 - How old were you when you first got the internet at home? Was it broadband/wireless or did you use dial-up? I remember it wasn’t long after my brother was born, so it was sometime in 1999. I remember when my mom brought home our first computer. Those were the days of dial up/AOL. Gah, I do not miss that. 

13 - Are you old enough to remember life without any kind of internet access whatsoever? What kind of things did you do to fill the time? Ha, yeah. It’s crazy to think of the days before the internet, but I did have them. I actually used to play outside *gasp* That’s shocking cause ya’ll know I’m a hermit crab. I used to get so tan back then cause I spent so much time outside. Other things I used to do was play Barbies for hours, play with my cousins, read, color, and watch TV.

14 - Have you ever gotten into an argument with a stranger online before? Lol yeah.

15 - Overall, would you say social media is a good thing or a bad thing, or does it depend on how you choose to use it? It definitely has its pros and cons. There’s a dark side to social media and the internet in general, but a lot of good can be done with it as well. 

16 - How much time do you think you spend online each day? Is this something that varies depending on the weather? I spend a decent amount of time online for sure, but it does vary. The weather has absolutely nothing to do with it. 

17 - If your internet went off right now and you knew it wouldn't come back on for several hours, what would you go and do instead? Well, it’s 3:50AM so I’d watch some TV and attempt to go to bed.

18 - Since getting the internet, what's the longest period of time you've gone without access to it? Did you miss it as much as you thought you might? Probably the times I had surgery. I didn’t have to go completely without because once I was able to I was able to rent laptops that were available for patient use or access a computer while there. That was really nice during the couple times I had to spend a few months in the hospital. Even the shorter stays, like a week or two, I had some access at some point. But yeah, I definitely wasn’t on nearly as much during those times. Not at all the first few days/week. Then when I was back home and had my laptop I still wouldn’t feel up to spending much online. I did miss it, but I spent so much time resting and sleeping during the early stages of recovery so it was fine for awhile. I did start to get stir crazy, though.

19 - What's something you find yourself doing less of because you spend too much time online? Hm. I can’t think of anything I do less for that particular reason. 

20 - What websites do you spend the most time on? Do these fall into any particular category or are they just random? Tumblr, YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter.

21 - What website from your childhood/teen years do you wish still existed? I miss Xanga a lot. The survey community was poppin back then. I miss the days, not so much the websites themselves, of Myspace, Neopets, playing games on Disney Channel’s and Nickelodeon’s websites, making dolls, and the AOL teen message boards. Good times, good times. Much nostalgia. 

22 - Have you ever met up with anyone in real life that you first met via the internet? Did you get on as well as you thought you would? Nope. I had online friends back in the day that I talked to all the time and actually texted with. I even talked to them on the phone a couple times. :O That was during my Jonas Brothers days and I got close to a few people that I met through a Jonas Brothers’ message board and chatroom. I was pretty involved on there. I can’t believe I used to do that cause I wouldn’t do that now.

23 - What's your thoughts on internet dating and is it something you would ever consider for yourself? I probably wouldn’t do it myself, but hey if that works for people then go for it. *shrug*

24 - Do you tend to shop more online or in person? Is that something that's changed since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic? I do all my shopping online now since the pandemic hit, but even for a few years prior I was doing most of my shopping online. 

25 - Speaking of the pandemic, did you find all the stories on social media quite scary or overwhelming at the beginning? Absolutely. 

26 - If someone on social media annoys or upsets you, are you likely to tell them or just hit the hide/block buttons? Nah, I’ll just keep on scrolling. If it’s that bad then I’d likely mute or just delete. 

27 - Are there topics you won't post on social media about, simply because they always end up in an argument? I don’t post about politics. 

28 - Are you friends with your parents and family members online? Do you limit what you say because you know they can see it? Yes and yes. Like, even though I don’t post anything bad or risqué lol I still hide some stuff from my grandparents just because they wouldn’t get it, ya know? I’ve done that before and my Nana called my dad and asked if I was okay cause I posted some relatable self-deprecating meme or something haha. It’s sweet of course that she cares, but yeah I didn’t want her to get worried and concerned over stuff like that.

29 - Are you using the internet for anything else except this survey right now? I’m watching ASMR videos on YouTube as well.

30 - Do you access the internet more via a phone, tablet or laptop/PC? Which device do you prefer overall? I use my phone a lot for certain things and my laptop for others. Like, I much prefer the Facebook and Twitter apps, and I access Snapchat, Instagram, TikTok, the Kindle app, and my email on my phone as well. I use both for YouTube. I only like to access Tumblr on my laptop, though, as well as Pinterest.

#personal #text #survey #surveys #internet #social media

[sgnjoowon]

hey hey everyone! this is my first time in seongnam and i’m super excited to be here. it’s kind of late for me, but i wanted to throw up an intro for my boi before i head to bed, so here we are! this is noh joowon, twenty two year old junior. he’s an animation major and a pretty popular BL webtoon author, but that last part is a ~*secret*~. he’s pretty loud and outspoken and often times annoying but he’s a... well... not good boy but a fun boy? anyway! i have his ABOUT, BACKGROUND, and PLOTS pages up if you’d like to take a look, but i’ll drop some info and wanted connections under the cut! and if you’d like to plot, please hit like on this post and i’ll pop into your ims, or you can reach me on TWITTER if you’d prefer to plot there! ♥️

QUICK FACTS !

so tl;dr - 22, a junior, majoring in animation with a minor in art. wanted to do things the other way around but he fucked up his registration forms and went with it

is also a pretty popular BL webtoon author under the pen name byungari (you can find more info about his webtoons here). only a handful of people know about this... it’s a Big Secret, he’ll have to end you if you find out

basically, entered a webtoon contest online in freshman year - didn’t win, but the company asked him for a story outline and quickly sent a contract over for a serialized webtoon to be published online. it did well, and then he got a contract for another one which was also well received/ranked

long story short, he just recently started publishing webtoon #3 which takes some heavy inspiration from the seongnam campus, so you’ll probably see familiar landmarks and faces if you follow it closely... honestly, he’s not all that subtle

anyway! he has a makeshift studio in the student centre and an assistant to help out with meeting deadlines and such. even then most days he barely submits his work on time and he’s always drawing in class instead of paying attention

considered a campus cryptid because he barely attends class and yet manages to pass most things... actually he’s there, just tucked in the back napping or quietly taking notes. he doesn’t participate much unless whatever’s going on is ‘interesting’

it’s just weird because he’s v. loud and opinionated otherwise - will get into debates right in the middle of class when it’s a subject he’s passionate (and right) about. some of his classmates are just straight up scared of getting into it with him

part of the art club (nominally; he joined because he felt obligated to but he doesn’t participate much), the cooking club (kinda; he’s just there for the food and also never like... ‘officially’ joined), and the paranormal club (this one’s legit. he loves paranormal stuff)

is the baby of his family; has 2 older siblings but they have a significant age gap with him so they were never close while growing up. they’re both like... very academically aligned with ~respectable careers~ (professor and doctor) so sometimes joowon feels like the odd one out with his focus on animation/art

his parents are divorced - dad has a whole other family that joowon has complicated feelings about!! he doesn’t like to think on it too much. was raised primarily by his mom while his dad really just pays for his education and stuff. compared to most kids from divorced homes he feels like he’s pretty well adjusted

his family isn’t super elite or wealthy, but they’re probably like... very comfortable but also very well connected with people who are considered elite (dad’s a lawyer and mom is the chairman/director of a elite private academy)

incidentally, went to that private academy before attending seongnam. it was very academics focused even though joowon was... not. but his parents are like whelp we did it right with the first two kids so it’s okay if kid #3 is into art and shit as long as he graduates from a good uni! hence him being at seongnam

really, his post graduation plans are just ‘i am going to make more webtoons and then maybe work in animation’ and he’s pretty happy with that

he’s very... hm... very blunt and straightforward in most of his dealings with people. super loud and confident and doesn’t hold back even if there’s a risk he might offend someone. he’s also pretty impulsive and short tempered so it doesn’t take much for him to go off. like, he’s passionate about a lot of things and sometimes that explodes out of him in a not-fun way

but he’s also like a very open, easy-to-befriend kinda guy, super supportive of his friends and generous where it counts. he’s very loyal and the kind of person who’d fight you but also fight FOR you in a heartbeat. he hates unhappy endings so he’s always trying to low key look out for his friends even if!! admitting he cares is embarrassing!!

he’s a cute kid who can be a lot sometimes. please be his friend anyway

WANTED CONNECTIONS !

friends!! some super casual friends to spend time with in between classes or grab a bite to eat with - he’s honestly pretty friendly when it comes down to it and even if you don’t know him well, he’ll probably consider you a pal. maybe you got paired for some activity during freshman orientation and stuck together, shared classes in the past, etc. you just know joowon as an entertaining dude

fellow animation / art majors or minors!! classmates, people to get stuck doing group projects with, we always work on our assignments together, looking for an empty studio to write and found you there so uh can we share. or on the flip side, department rivals?? getting into arguments / heated debates in the middle of class and getting sent out? always competing to see who’s better but they’re both good!

art club members who are like please come to a meeting please please come to just one meeting - or, y’know, forcibly drag or trick him into participating. someone who recruited him into the art club to begin with and now they have regrets. someone who finds an old exhibition piece he did for the club or something and is like omg please come back sunabe i want to learn from you--

cooking club members who he kind of follows around because they make really good food. people who don’t realize he’s not officially in the club and try to get him to participate but he’s like these hands are not made for cooking. someone who does realize but is like aw he’s harmless let him hang around. let him lick the spoon--

paranormal club bros... it’s the one club he’s actually serious about for reasons unknown (actually, it’s known: he wants to fuck a vampire) so members who share similar interests or just like his intensity or just think he’s a riot. maybe they try to film their own version of buzzfeed unsolved and hit up a bunch of supposedly haunted places or chase paranormal activity idk

people who read / have read his webtoons! whether they’re fans of him or antis... maybe someone he’s friends with irl who reads every update but doesn’t know he’s the author, or someone he’s friends with irl who hates the webtoon and joowon has to stop themselves from fighting them. or like... interacting on twitter about the webtoons, someone who writes fic or draws fanart and always dms it to him, idk, someone who leaves hate comments whom he fights with on a sock account?? 

he has a weird relationship with sunbaes in the sense that he can get really needy / attention-seeking around them (maybe he craves the close older sibling figures he’s never had in his life!) so sunbaes he can bother / be cute around. whether they tolerate him, shoo him away, or take care of him... idk

enemies?? for various reasons - maybe they’re rivals, maybe they just pissed joowon off or vice versa, maybe they just made eye contact and challenged each other to a fight pokemon style, maybe he just can’t stand the way they act, but enemies are fun...

some romantic connections like exes? hasn’t dated much recently maybe a few people in the past, or like people who have confessed to him but he turned them down pretty callously. or someone who falls in love with his art and thinks that means they like joowon but when they try to get to know him they’re like oh... oh no

i know i missed a bunch of stuff but i have more specific plots here if nothing sparks your interest + and i’m always open to brainstorm something as well! 

#out of comics #/ idk if there is an intro tag but #/ anyway please plot with us we don't bite #/ :)