#but having already read the codex I would be good on that side of things

[marrr444]

Do I want to be a Shadowhunter? Yes.

Would I also die on my first day of training? Also yes.

I would probably fall off a beam in the training room or something.

#the shadowhunter chronicles #tsc #Shadowhunter #but having already read the codex I would be good on that side of things #honestly I can memorize all the names of Lilith and beat alec if you want #I would not even honorably die by a demon or anything

[iaminfourthwing]

The Generals Daughter

Chapter III

The sun is up when we stand in formation the next day while Captain Fitzgibbons reads from the death roll. The courtyard is hollowed in almost deadly silence.

We’re all in our assigned uniforms for first years with our patches added and while some of us look like they got a decent amount of sleep last night, I didn`t and I feel like I am ready to be send to Malek. But my mind was running on high speed and I was way too paranoid to sleep, ready for the (mostly im)possible scenario someone might try to pull some shit at night, even though it would be against the Codex. Violet next to me looks like she struggles but is keeping her head high. She is strong which makes me proud.

“We command their souls to Malek.” Oh, we were at the end already.

“Hopefully you all ate breakfast, because you`re not going to get another chance before lunch” Dain says, “and I hope at least one of you first years has the academic schedule remembered.”

“And if we’re not?” someone behind us says. Is he dumb?

“Then I don`t have to be concerned with forgetting your name” Aetos shrugs. Well.

“Sawyer” he looks to the left at a first year. Ah, Sawyer Henrick, the freckled guy that repeats the first year because he didn`t bond during Threshing last year. It takes some balls to do this shit again, he has my full respect.

“I`ll get them there” he answers and turns to the nine of us first years. “Fourth floor, second room on the left in the academic wing. Get your shit and don`t be fucking late” he shouts and heads off to the dormitory.

“This must be shit, doing this again” Rhiannon states.

“Better than being dead” the guy from before claims as he walks on my right side. I think his name is Ridoc but I am not sure. I look around, not saying anything and make my way to the dorms, not noticing that Violet isn't by my side anymore. In her place walks Rhiannon. “Where-“ “Dain” she says before I can ask. Damn Aetos, so much for being subtle.

We`re off to grab our (and Violets) stuff and head over to the academic wing for history, which is going to be boring for both Violet and myself. Violet was trained to be a scribe, so she knows it all, and I had to study everything anyways, order from my father.

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“Welcome to your first Battle Brief” Professor Devera greets us. This will be the only class we`ll have every day.

She takes her time to scan the rows of first years, looking at every cadet she sees, while the second and third years are scattered behind us.

At first, she makes eye contact with Violet next to me and gives her a small smile and nod but when her eyes find mine, she tenses and stops. For around three second it`s quiet, then she nods and continues. Rolling my eyes, I look to the left at Violet, seeing a concerned frown adorning her face. I send her a reassuring smile and turn back to the front where Professor Markham stands. He looks at Violet with disappointment, not because of her personally but the lost chances with that great brain of hers. She would have been an excellent scribe.

His gaze sways over to my side and just like with Panchek, his face pales instantly and fear strikes his facial features, not because of me but the one I share my last name with. Letting out a frustrated sigh I switch my focus on my quill, distracting myself before I start to scream out of annoyance. For fucks sake, I am NOT my father. Why is everyone acting like he rules the fucking continent?

“First topic of the day,” Devera moves to the map “the Eastern Wing experienced an attack last night near the village of Chakir by a drift of Braevi gryphons and their riders.” Oh damn. I sit straighter and focus on the map. Good thing when you have an excellent working memory – you can focus more on the front, less on your notes.

She gives further information and I take it all in. It’s bad enough that dragons aren`t the only animals capable of channeling powers to their riders. But the dragons are the only ones of powering the wards that makes other power impossible within these wards. They make sure we aren`t fucked up by the gryphons and their riders.

“…What questions would you ask? Only answers from first years for the start.”

Okay first of all, why the fuck are the wards faltering and more importantly what caused them to falter in such an unlikely place? They would never answer that question because none of us is authorized in that matter.

The second question would be, why they would choose this place for an attack? The Esben Mountain Range is the highest on the eastern border and the gryphons don`t go really well with altitudes like this. Furrowing my eyebrows, I try to find a pattern in the latest attacks. It doesn`t make any sense. But maybe … maybe they were searching for something.

“Did you want to ask a question?” Devera asks Pryor, a first year in our squad, who doesn`t really knows if he should raise his hand or not.

“Yes” he nods. Then – “No. Never mind.”

“So decisive” Luca, another first year from our squad, mocks him. Aurelie tries to ease the tension but Luca is not done with her teasing.

“No dragon is bonding to a guy who can`t even decide if he wants to ask a question. And have you seen –“ I scoff loudly, rolling my eyes at her demeanor to finally bring an end to this shit, which makes her turn around in her seat a row in front of me. If some of them are already kind of terrified with my face here, why not use it?

Her eyes meet mine and she realizes who interrupted her. She quickly turns back to the map without saying anything anymore.

I hear Violet and Rhiannon whisper to each other but don`t understand anything.

“What altitude is the village at?” Rhiannon finally asks. Oh, that`s a good question, matches with mine I had in my head. It`s Professor Markham who answers, surprised by it. “A little less than ten thousand feet, why?”

“It seems a little high for an attack with gryphons.” Good safe, because now I just realized that the question came from Violet. Smartass.

“… to ask your own questions, Cadet Sorrengail.” Shit, I need to start listening and try not to zone out all the time. Seems like the girl next to me has now all the attention on her. Great job, Vi.

Violet goes on about how this altitude is way too high for gryphons and their ability to channel. Looks like a thought crosses her genius brain as her next question is based on Devera’s information that the squad of riders took an hour to arrive.

“Then they were already on their way” she says. And while I can see what she is talking about – the rest of the first years decide to judge instead of thinking, some of them start to laugh.

“Yeah, because that makes sense” a blonde guy turns around in his seat to laugh directly in her face. Jack fucking Barlowe, the asshole that threw a candidate down the Parapet tried to kill Violet and still has it out for her.

“General Melgren knows the outcome of a battle before it happens, but even he doesn`t know when it will happen, dumbass. Am I right, Melgren Junior?” His eyes find mine when an evil smirk finds its way onto his face. Don`t fucking tempt me, asshole. I am not interested in a conversation with you.

My lack of response seems to annoy him because he tries it again. “I said, am I righ-“

“There is no need to repeat yourself. I ignored you just fine the first time.”

Stunned silence from Barlowe, startled gasps from other cadets, choked laughter from Ridoc. “Oh shit, that was good, Arya!” he laughs next to me and clasps his hand on my shoulder. Yeah no, I don`t think so Ridoc. I should try to keep my mouth shut with that one before I'll regret it.

Violet ignores my remark and continues with her theory and it seems like she is right, because Devera and Markham both look proud and with a knowing smile on their face. “Because they somehow knew the wards were breaking” she finishes.

“That`s the most-“Jack argues. Does he ever know when to stop?! “She`s right.” HA! I have a proud grin on my face, I love her brain!

“Cadet Melgren” I am called by Devera. Startled I raise my head, brow hitting my hairline.

“What would you ask in aspect of the attack?” she asks me. For a moment I study the map again, trying to sort my thoughts.

“What were they looking for and most importantly, did they find it?”

A slow smile spreads over Deveras face and even Markham looks intrigued by my question. “What makes you think they were out looking for something?”

“Well, it just makes sense they searched for something. Like Cadet Sorrengail said, the attack took action at the most illogical place for a drift of gryphons.” I pause, bringing my thoughts into formation. “The wards failing was not a coincidence and even though it seems like they were just passing by, they weren`t. They somehow knew the wards would falter in that specific moment. But whatever they were looking for, it must have been really important if they risk their drift to attack this high up in the mountains.” I finish.

I can hear Ridoc next to me cheering quietly in his seat. And while the first and some of the second years don’t think that far yet, I am pretty sure some of the third years had a similar question in mind, because I hear approving whispers behind me. Years of learning and studying are finally paying off.

“Just like your father. Always thinking ahead and seeing the important aspects. Good job, Melgren.” Everyone else would see it as a compliment but … 

I hate it, with all my heart, because I desperately want to be everything but like my father. Violet takes my hand, knowing how much I hate to be compared to the General.

#fourth wing #fourth wing x reader #iron flame #bodhi durran #xaden riorson #bodhi durran x oc #bodhi durran x reader #fourth wing by rebecca yarros #rebecca yarros #booktok #violet sorrengail

[bellamy-davos]

incoming transmission: DAVOS , BELLAMY from the planet of BESPIN is making arrangements to land on batuu. the TWENTY SIX year old HUMAN is here to become a LORE KEEPER. keep a close eye on them, i hear they can be SARCASTIC, MUSICAL, and EASILY CONFUSED. they have documented that they always bring their BLASTER with them. (joey batey, cis male, he/him, pan)

bellamy davos should have never ended up the lore keeper of the brethren court.

born on tatooine to a barmaid, there wasn’t much bellamy could do except work and hope for a better life out there in the galaxy.

but it's tatooine. and nothing is ever completely peaceful for long. when he was 18, he was “pressed” (read: kidnapped) into the service of weequay pirate crew and he never had time to explain that he was awful with a blaster and couldn’t shoot the broad side of a bantha to save his life. he originally hoped once they learned this, they’d either kill him or leave him behind on the next planet. or maybe he could just desert! that’d work better in everyone’s favor.

but one night, when he thought everyone was asleep, he found himself humming a tune that his mom used to sing to him when he was little, trying to calm himself down a little from a long and stressful day of arguing his survival. some of the others, including the captain, heard it and someone should’ve mentioned that weequays always loved a good party.

so bellamy was kept around, as a canary, singing and humming and giving subtle signals for look out. it was better, but by no means a great living. he was still barely feeding himself and the pirates got rowdy when they got smashed and he was not much of a fighter. but he liked to think he was alive and that was more than he could say for some.

for three years, that’s how he lived, until when docked on florum, the pirates were raided and no one bothered to check the cells until the dust settled. there, he met cormag selios, who much like the weequay before him, found himself fascinated by the canary in a spice den. he took the young man on as an apprentice, actually bothering to try and teach him how to survive in this life. and that included the smuggler’s code, taught out of the codex itself. bellamy never felt the need to ask, figuring it was one of those mass produced books like the historians started doing of the jedi texts once they had access to the library again.

another three years under cormag and finally bellamy felt like he was living instead of just surviving. it was hard work, unstable sometimes, but he gave a shit about the crew around him and to his surprise, they gave a bit of a shit about him too.

but good things end, and smuggling is a dangerous game.

what was supposed to be an easy transaction resulted in a sting by the first order, the death of the crew as a certainty. bellamy found the aftermath and cormag told him to grab the code and run, only stopping if he had to heed the call. not that it was likely, cormag had told him everyone was needed and so many of them were already dead.

so bellamy ran, hiding out in taverns that would have him, singing if he needed the credits, and bickering with resident starlets when he had to.

no need to worry about the massive codex burning a hole in his bag right? right?

as tasked all those years ago, when han solo called for the court bellamy answered. a little panicked and an octave higher than his typical speaking voice but he agreed, quickly making the arrangements on bespin to travel to korad.

he has a hyperspace journey to relearn a codex he hasn’t thought about in five years. no pressure.

#bs: intro #* about bellamy

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.

─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 

author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.

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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 

Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.

Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 

But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.

Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”

You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.

But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 

Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.

That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 

You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 

Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.

Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.

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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”

Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.

“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”

While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.

r u dating sykkuno?

You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”

the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team

“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”

how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?

“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 

can i be adopted by ur parents plz

will you and corpse ever collab?!

You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.

Corpse_Husband: yes.

Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.

pack it up, sykkuno

More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 

“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”

we are prepared

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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.

y/n is a child murderer

“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”

take a break and go eat queen <3

“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”

Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 

“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 

The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 

“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”

Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”

“Your pizza came.”

“My what now?” You echo, confused.

“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”

“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”

Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.

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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”

If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 

looking hot, her message read. 

thanks, was all you replied with.

You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.

Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.

“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”

You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.

“Glad you liked it, baby.”

He was going to be the death of you.

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse husband imagine #corpse social media au #corpse husband fanfic #social media au #corpse husband x y/n #corpse x y/n #corpse husband fic #reader #xreader #imagine #imagines #myso #make you say oh

[butterflies-dragons]

GRRM has projected his love for medieval tourneys, heraldry, pageantry, knights and chivalry on Sansa Stark

Art credit: Heinrich von Breslau (Codex Manesse, 14. Jahrhundert)

GRRM:

“That whole story (The Hedge Knight) is built around a tournament. I love medieval tournaments, reading about them, writing about them. There's of course some of them in the main books, but this was an opportunity in a time of peace, not war, to look at a medieval tournament with all its pageantry and the jousting and the combat and reveal a little of Westerosi History”.

—In conversation: George R.R. Martin with Dan Jones FULL EVENT- August 2019

SANSA:

"The talk in the yard is we shall have a tourney, my lord," Jory said as he resumed his seat. "They say that knights will come from all over the realm to joust and feast in honor of your appointment as Hand of the King."

Arya could see that her father was not very happy about that. "Do they also say this is the last thing in the world I would have wished?"

Sansa's eyes had grown wide as the plates. "A tourney," she breathed. She was seated between Septa Mordane and Jeyne Poole, as far from Arya as she could get without drawing a reproach from Father. "Will we be permitted to go, Father?"

"You know my feelings, Sansa. It seems I must arrange Robert's games and pretend to be honored for his sake. That does not mean I must subject my daughters to this folly."

"Oh, please," Sansa said. "I want to see."

Septa Mordane spoke up. "Princess Myrcella will be there, my lord, and her younger than Lady Sansa. All the ladies of the court will be expected at a grand event like this, and as the tourney is in your honor, it would look queer if your family did not attend."

Father looked pained. "I suppose so. Very well, I shall arrange a place for you, Sansa." He saw Arya. "For both of you."

"I don't care about their stupid tourney," Arya said. She knew Prince Joffrey would be there, and she hated Prince Joffrey.

Sansa lifted her head. "It will be a splendid event. You shan't be wanted."

—A Game of Thrones - Arya II

Sansa rode to the Hand's tourney with Septa Mordane and Jeyne Poole, in a litter with curtains of yellow silk so fine she could see right through them. They turned the whole world gold. Beyond the city walls, a hundred pavilions had been raised beside the river, and the common folk came out in the thousands to watch the games. The splendor of it all took Sansa’s breath away; the shining armor, the great chargers caparisoned in silver and gold, the shouts of the crowd, the banners snapping in the wind…and the knights themselves, the knights most of all.

“It is better than the songs,” she whispered when they found the places that her father had promised her, among the high lords and ladies. Sansa was dressed beautifully that day, in a green gown that brought out the auburn of her hair, and she knew they were looking at her and smiling.

They watched the heroes of a hundred songs ride forth, each more fabulous than the last.

—A Game of Thrones - Sansa II

GRRM:

“Tolkien imitators who came after him, a lot of them created a sort of Disneyland Middle Ages, you know, a sort of Middle Ages like you might see at a Renaissance Faire, but you don't have the dysentery, or the torture, or the leprosy, or the innate sexism, or classism, or racism that was so built into so much of that world for so many centuries, you really have to take, you know, I like the knights in shinning armor, the heraldry and pageantry as much as anyone, but you also have to include the fleas."

— Neuchâtel International Fantastic Film Festival - NIFFF 2014

The novelist is midway through something of a European tour. After his trip to Switzerland, he is due in Scotland for the Edinburgh book festival. It has often been suggested that Ivanhoe (by the Scottish 19th-century novelist Walter Scott) was, alongside the War of the Roses, a major influence on A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones.

Martin was first turned on to Ivanhoe by the 1952 MGM movie starring Robert Taylor, George Sanders and a young Elizabeth Taylor. "I think it was Elizabeth Taylor at the peak of her...," his voice tails off before he clarifies. "She was the most beautiful woman in the world. I think I was nine years old when I saw that movie. How could you not fall in love with her? But the jousting and the pageantry of it made me love that story. Later, in high school, I did read that book. For a modern reader, it's a little tough to get through. The prose is very Victorian and thick but if you fight your way through it, the story is there. It has everything the movie has and more – the heraldry and jousting and the insight into the times. It was an influence in that sense."

—GRRM - Independent - 2014

SANSA:

The green knight laughed again. "Barristan the Old, you mean. Don't flatter him too sweetly, child, he thinks overmuch of himself already." He smiled at her. "Now, wolf girl, if you can put a name to me as well, then I must concede that you are truly our Hand's daughter."

Joffrey stiffened beside her. "Have a care how you address my betrothed."

"I can answer," Sansa said quickly, to quell her prince's anger. She smiled at the green knight. "Your helmet bears golden antlers, my lord. The stag is the sigil of the royal House. King Robert has two brothers. By your extreme youth, you can only be Renly Baratheon, Lord of Storm's End and councillor to the king, and so I name you."

—A Game of Thrones - Sansa I

No one ransomed the northmen, though. One fat lordling haunted the kitchens, Hot Pie told her, always looking for a morsel. His mustache was so bushy that it covered his mouth, and the clasp that held his cloak was a silver-and-sapphire trident. He belonged to Lord Tywin, but the fierce, bearded young man who liked to walk the battlements alone in a black cloak patterned with white suns had been taken by some hedge knight who meant to get rich off him. Sansa would have known who he was, and the fat one too, but Arya had never taken much interest in titles and sigils. Whenever Septa Mordane had gone on about the history of this house and that house, she was inclined to drift and dream and wonder when the lesson would be done.

—A Clash of Kings - Arya VII

Petyr had given her a roll of arms to study, so she knew their heraldry if not their faces. The red castle was Redfort, plainly; a short man with a neat grey beard and mild eyes. Lady Anya was the only woman amongst the Lords Declarant, and wore a deep green mantle with the broken wheel of Waynwood picked out in beads of jet. Six silver bells on purple, that was Belmore, pear-bellied and round of shoulder. His beard was a ginger-grey horror sprouting from a multiplicity of chins. Symond Templeton's, by contrast, was black and sharply pointed. A beak of a nose and icy blue eyes made the Knight of Ninestars look like some elegant bird of prey. His doublet displayed nine black stars within a golden saltire. Young Lord Hunter's ermine cloak confused her till she spied the brooch that pinned it, five silver arrows fanned. Alayne would have put his age closer to fifty than to forty. His father had ruled at Longbow Hall for nigh on sixty years, only to die so abruptly that some whispered the new lord had hastened his inheritance. Hunter's cheeks and nose were red as apples, which bespoke a certain fondness for the grape. She made certain to fill his cup as often as he emptied it.

—A Feast for Crows - Alayne I

Harry was staring at her. He knows who I am, she realized, and he does not seem pleased to see me. It was only then that she took note of his heraldry. Though his surcoat and horse trappings were patterned in the red-and-white diamonds of House Hardyng, his shield was quartered. The arms of Hardyng and Waynwood were displayed in the first and third quarters, respectively, but in the second and fourth quarters he bore the moon-and-falcon of House Arryn, sky blue and cream. Sweetrobin will not like that.

—The Winds of Winter - Alayne I

GRRM:

Firstly, thanks for that very thorough response on the tournaments and knighthood. Fascinating. In particular given the notes about _Ivanhoe_ and its influence -- I've only witnessed the A&E production of it, although maybe about time I read it. Seems it might be ripe for ideas.

IVANHOE is well worth a read, although the style is very old fashioned, of course. Still it has some fabulous characters and scenes, and so far as I know the definitive portrayal of a medieval tournament, both melee and joust.

It has been filmed three times that I know of. The recent A&E production had some good moments, as did the older Sam Neill version... the CLASSIC version, however, is still MGM's 50s version, starring Robert Taylor, Elizabeth Taylor, and George Sanders. The jousts are wonderful, Liz is radiant, and George Sanders steals the film as Bois-Gilbert. You should definitely rent that one and have a look.

—GRRM - 1999

SANSA:

She loved King's Landing; the pageantry of the court, the high lords and ladies in their velvets and silks and gemstones, the great city with all its people. The tournament had been the most magical time of her whole life, and there was so much she had not seen yet, harvest feasts and masked balls and mummer shows. She could not bear the thought of losing it all.

—A Game of Thrones - Sansa III

She closed the window, gathered up the fallen papers, and stacked them on the table. One was a list of the competitors. Four-and-sixty knights had been invited to vie for places amongst Lord Robert Arryn's new Brotherhood of Winged Knights, and four and-sixty knights had come to tilt for the right to wear falcon's wings upon their warhelms and guard their lord.

The competitors came from all over the Vale, from the mountain valleys and the coast, from Gulltown and the Bloody Gate, even the Three Sisters. Though a few were promised, only three were wed; the eight victors would be expected to spend the next three years at Lord Robert's side, as his own personal guard (Alayne had suggested seven, like the Kingsguard, but Sweetrobin had insisted that he must have more knights than King Tommen), so older men with wives and children had not been invited.

And they came, Alayne thought proudly. They all came.

It had fallen out just as Petyr said it would, the day the ravens flew. "They're young, eager, hungry for adventure and renown. Lysa would not let them go to war. This is the next best thing. A chance to serve their lord and prove their prowess. They will come. Even Harry the Heir." He had smoothed her hair and kissed her forehead. "What a clever daughter you are."

It was clever. The tourney, the prizes, the winged knights, it had all been her own notion. Lord Robert's mother had filled him full of fears, but he always took courage from the tales she read him of Ser Artys Arryn, the Winged Knight of legend, founder of his line. Why not surround him with Winged Knights? She had thought one night, after Sweetrobin had finally drifted off to sleep. His own Kingsguard, to keep him safe and make him brave. And no sooner did she tell Petyr her idea than he went out and made it happen.

—The Winds of Winter - Alayne I

GRRM:

Amon Shin in Maine asks, “If you lived in Westeros, which house would you like to be part of, or in which area would you like to live?”

Well, you know, there’s something to be said for being an honorable Stark, but you’re kinda cold all the time and poor and so forth. And you have a lot of land, but there’s not a lot of stuff on it, you know? On the other hand, if you’re a Lannister, you have a nice house and all the gold you want and all of that stuff.  So, there’s a lot to be said for being a Lannister.  I don’t know.  Maybe I could probably see me being a Lannister.  And I would always pay my debts.

—A Dance with Dragons | George R.R. Martin | Talks at Google - July 2011

SANSA:

They were going to take it all away; the tournaments and the court and her prince, everything, they were going to send her back to the bleak grey walls of Winterfell and lock her up forever. Her life was over before it had begun.

—A Game of Thrones - Sansa III

* * *

Art credit: Loras Tyrell gives Sansa Stark a rose at the Hand’s Tournament by Jonathan Burton.

As you can see, Sansa loves tourneys because GRRM loves tourneys.

During the events that take place in the ASOIAF Books, we find 5 tourneys and Sansa Stark is directly or indirectly linked with all of them:

The Hand's tourney, a tourney in honor of Sansa’s father, Eddard Stark. Sansa was unofficially crowned the Queen of Love and Beauty by the Knight of Flowers, Loras Tyrell. GRRM wrote this passage as a resemblance to the Great tourney at Harrenhal, hiding hints and reversing colors. 

Tourney on King Joffrey's name day, a tourney in honor of Sansa’s betrothed. Sansa defended and saved Dontos Hollard’s life.

Melee at Bitterbridge, Brienne won the melee and earned a place in Renly’s Kingsguard. Later she swore his allegiance to Sansa’s mother, Catelyn Stark, and made an oath to find Sansa Stark. Brienne also wields Oathkeeper, a sword made of Ice (House Stark ancestral sword).  

Melee at Runestone, this event was organized with the sole intention of knighting Harrold Hardyng, Alayne Stone’s betrothed.

Tourney at the Gates of the Moon to select the members of the Brotherhood of Winged Knights, created and organized by Alayne Stone.

Sansa is also linked with other important tourneys that happened previously to the events of the ASOIAF Books:

Tourney at Ashford Meadows (The Hedge Knight), GRRM wrote the Hedge Knight when he was in the middle of writing A Clash of Kings, and he made sure of link the five initial champions of the Tourney at Ashford Meadows (Baratheon, Lannister, Tyrell, Hardyng & Targaryen) with Sansa’s suitors and betrothed. So Willas Tyrell and Harrold Hardyng are not a coincidence in Sansa’s arc, GRRM had already planned for this since he was writing A Clash of Kings.    

Great tourney at Harrenhal, this tourney was won by Rhaegar Targaryen and as the champion he crowned Lyanna Stark (Sansa’s aunt & Jon Snow’s mother) as his Queen of Love and Beauty. And take note at this very interesting detail: Rhaegar Targaryen wearing an armor adorned with rubies (red) gave Lyanna Stark a crown of winter roses (blue), while Loras Tyrell, the Knight of Flowers, wearing an armor adorned with sapphires (blue) gave Sansa a (red) rose.

Sansa loves knights because GRRM loves knights. Remember that George’s Catholic high school (Marist) football team is called the Royal Knights: 

Sansa loves pageantry because GRRM loves pageantry. Just look at his collection of knights and ladies figurines:

Sansa loves heraldry because GRRM loves heraldry. Take note that GRRM took inspiration from the antagonist of Ivanhoe, Brian de Bois-Guilbert’s sigil, to created House Corbray’s sigil:

Bois-Guilbert’s new shield bore a raven in full flight, holding in its claws a skull, and bearing the motto, Gare le Corbeau.

—IVANHOE: A Romance

The youngest man in the party had three ravens on his chest, each clutching a blood-red heart in its talons. His brown hair was shoulder length; one stray lock curled down across his forehead. Ser Lyn Corbray, Alayne thought, with a wary glance at his hard mouth and restless eyes.

—A Feast for Crows - Alayne I

(Not to mention that Sansa loves books because George loves books...)

There you have it, GRRM self inserts in a few of his ASOIAF characters, and Sansa Stark is one of them.

#Sansa Stark #GRRM #ASOIAF #Yes there is a House Corbray stained glass window in GRRM's office #George loves Brian de Bois Gilbert #Lyn Corbray is inspired in Bois Gilbert me thinks #Bois Gilbert kidnapped Rebecca... #:eyes emoji: #All tourneys in ASOIAF are inspired in Ivanhoe #I recommend you to read Ivanhoe #I recommend you to watch Ivanhoe movies too especially the Liz Taylor one #Radiant Liz Taylor played Rebecca

[pinoy-culture]

before I ask my question, I just wanted to say thank you so so so much for keeping up your blog and consistently giving out information where its readily accessible!!!

maybe this will make me sound like an idiot but to preface, I’m a mixed filipino american. My mom is filipino and some chinese and my dad is some sort of european and puerto rican. i was wondering, in your opinion, do you think it’d be okay for me (eventually) work with diwata and anitos? And how can I start? Ive been trying to communicate with my ancestors and I’ve been looking for books to one day buy (im extremely broke so your blog and any filipino witches i come across is all the info i can get) but i honestly have no clue where to start other than with my ancestors (weird dreams lately but nothing ancestor related i think). i took a DNA test as a gift and it pointed, predominantly, to the Western Visayas so im assuming i should study more on pre-colonial Bisayan culture (my lolas from iloilo so it makes sense i guess) but i also know that “blood quantum” is a colonizer concept so i dont wanna rely on it too much :/ sorry to ramble but pls help lol

First, I'd like to say thank you for following the blog! It really does mean a lot to me to hear from others over the years on how much my blogs have helped them learn about our history and culture.

Now as for working with our diwata and the anito, that is completely ok. The whole blood quantum thing among some Filipinos I honestly don't agree with. As long as you have a family member who is Filipino, you are Filipino regardless of your "percentage" and of how you look. If you have Filipino blood in you, the ancestors are there with you. Even if you weren't raised within Filipino culture or a Filipino household because your parents never brought you up in it, or you are an adoptee like some I've met over the years. Your ancestors are your ancestors regardless. They see you and know you and that is all that matters.

Now there really isn't any book focused specifically on reviving our precolonial beliefs and practices. Yes, some did survive and some even blended in with a form of Folk Christianity in the Philippines. You can see many of the older practices and beliefs still alive, but they have been replaced with Catholic imagery and Saints.

But, in regards actually believing in and worshiping our old deities, doing rituals dedicated to the deity, or even some rites of passage like the Tagalog first menstruation rite of passage, or making carved figures dedicated to the diwata and anito, or performing maganito/paganito or atang to the diwata and anito, majority of Filipinos don't do this, or even know it.

So for being an Anito Reconstructionist, which is a label I personally use for my spiritual beliefs and others have adopted, there really isn't a book for it. A Reconstructionist in other ethnic spiritual paths, such as the Celtic, Roman, Aztec, Kemetic, Greek, Norse, etc., are those who look at historical records to try and piece together what was once practiced and believed in prior to Christianity. Over many years, these different spiritual paths have eventually come together, formed a community, and have resources like books and teachers. They have had the time to do all the research and put together a more formal spirituality based on those Pre-Christian beliefs and bringing it to the modern day where they have hundreds to thousands of people who have gone back to those beliefs. With some, they have even created temples, shrines to their deities, and even have celebrations.

Unfortunately that is not the case for us. However, due to the growing interest in our precolonial beliefs and practices over the years, I can see Anito Reconstructionism growing within the next several years. It already has, with many people actually trying to learn more about these beliefs and our old deities. The amount of people of people I've seen and talked to who have expressed their interest to reclaim these precolonial beliefs and practices is nothing compared to 10 years ago when it was hard to even find one or two people who did.

It is why I've been writing this book for a few years now dedicated to helping others in wanting to reclaim our precolonial beliefs and practices as a starting point in their research. For now though, I always recommend those who are starting to simply just read the historical texts. Grab a notebook and write down notes. Organize your notes into deities, rituals, how to make an offering, any prayers to a specific deity, how to set up an altar, etc.

Seeing as your family is from the island of Panay in the Western Bisayas, like my moms side are from, I would start with looking at the Bisayan precolonial beliefs and practices. A really good reference is reading Francisco Alcina's History of the Bisayans (1668). Volume 3 is available online in English which you can find here. Volume 3 goes into a lot of detail in the beliefs and practices. The Boxer Codex, if you are able to get a copy of the English translation, is also really good reading material.

Getting Started:

In terms of getting started, keep in mind that there is no one monolithic belief system or practice in the Philippines. Before there ever was a Philippines, we were different nations with different beliefs and practices. It is important to know your ethnic groups beliefs and practices and know their history. For example, I am Bisaya (Akeanon specifically) and Tagalog and that is what I work with. Others who I know follow the Bikolano, Kapampangan, or Ilokano beliefs. Though there are some similarities, each ethnic group had their own set beliefs and practices.

I often tell people that you can't just mix and match between them. For example, though I work with both the Tagalog and Bisayan pantheons, I wouldn't dare do a ritual offering to both a Tagalog or Bisayan deity at the same time. It's always separate. You also can't combine 2 similar deities together from different ethnic groups just because they share similar attributes. It's just rude and disrespectful.

Start out small. Set up an altar dedicated to your ancestors. If you have any family members who have passed, put a photo of them on the altar. Leave offerings of rice cakes such as suman, food like chicken adobo, or even a cup of drink such as tuba, lambanog, or even Red Horse beer. But if you can't get access to an alcoholic drink either because one you are a minor or 2 it's not available where you live, you can simply replace it with a non-alcoholic drinks like coconut juice. Get a coconut shell or a seashell to either place these offerings as bowls/plates or even use them to put your kamangyan or incense.

Then start researching how our Bisayan ancestors worshiped and practiced. Study the history and read historical accounts, books, and articles about them. Write down what you have learned on these precolonial beliefs and practices and reconstruct or revive them. This is what Polytheistic Recinstructionists do. I have listed links to these texts here.

Ask questions to your family, particularly your elders. See if they know of anything or if they can share some traditional practices and beliefs they know of have heard of. You would be surprised how, despite some families being really religious, many still believe in the spirits, do some form of ancestor veneration, believe in omens that are being told to you by the ancestors or spirits, etc.

If you can, try to go back to the Philippines and see your family's ancestral home, see where they grew up, etc. Ask about family stories and folk stories. For example, my mom grew up in Aklan and has always told me stories of the aswang and certain omens. She also constantly talks about the mischievous "little people" who play tricks on you (for example putting something down like your keys and then it goes missing, until you find it again somewhere else). In the Western Bisayas, they are known as kama-kama. There is also a story of how her grandmother's cat visited her during her wake. The cat was missing for years, but it came back and stayed sleeping on top of the casket for days before it left. My mom told me that it was the cat paying their respects to her grandmother.

Keep in mind also and acknowledge our indigenous communities who have kept their beliefs and practices. Don't try to take them into your own. I have seen people cherry pick things from the Manobo of Mindanao or the Kalinga in the Cordillera, which is just disrespectful. Many of the IP, though some still have kept their beliefs, it isn't the most important aspect to them. What they are most concerned about are other issues such as losing their homes due to occupation by oil or logging companies, other settlers such as the Tagalog and Bisayans (especially in Mindanao), getting targeted as "rebels" by the Philippine military and often getting killed. But, by cherry picking beliefs especially of the IP groups, it's just disrespectful.

I will be teaching classes on Anito Reconstructionism soon and will have my first class possibly at the end of the month or next month. I decided to do these classes seeing as there is a growing community who are interested, but don't know where to start. I'll be doing a proper announcement on these classes real soon so look out for the announcement and hopefully you will be able to join!

#filipino #diwata #anito #anito reconstructionist #polytheist #polytheism #precolonial philippines #faq #question #long post

[blind-alchemists]

Meta-Analysis of the Rift Mage Specialization

I said in February I was going to do it, and it only took me seven months to follow through!

Anyway. Analyzing game-play elements for narratives purposes has become somewhat of a hobby of mine ever since I really got into GameLit. Then, I started "fangs" and felt that my fight scenes were boring, so I build ability trees reminiscent of DA:I's for my OCs. You know, as you do. During that process, though, the lack of banter acknowledging several choices struck me as odd. Especially regarding specializations. Especially when it comes to Solas'.

We’ll be taking a look at (in order)

1. Description

2. Codex Entry

3. Skills

a. in comparison to DA: II’s Primal & Force Mage

4. Specialization Dialogue with Solas

5. Conclusion

Disclaimer: I talk a lot (this post might have about 2.5k). And, I promise you, you'll be tired of seeing 'the Fade this' and 'the Veil that' at the end of it.

Description

“These mages draw upon the force of the Fade, either pulling matter from the Fade to attack or twisting the Veil itself into a weapon to stagger or crush their enemies.”

[source – DA wiki; bolding mine]

So, lore-wise, mages do ‘draw upon the Fade’. Sure. But do they ‘pull matter from the Fade’? Absolutely not.

Physical things and the Fade rarely mix well. Plus – this is mainly my theory – the way magic is utilized (the 'drawing upon the Fade part') requires it to pass through the Veil. Magic being a form of energy, and thus not physical, does not constitute to ‘pulling matter from the Fade’.

That's the first thing other mages (read: Dorian, Vivienne, possible the Inquisitor) should (or could) have referenced in banter/dialogue.

The rest of the sentence ('twisting the Veil into a weapon') is also highly interesting, since there is little known about the Veil. Nobody knows how it works. And, thus, nobody should be capable enough to manipulate it consistently enough to use it as a weapon. But considering it's Solas who gets this specialization - well. He knows the Veil well enough, don't you think? (Which is why I think Rift Mage should have been Solas' personal, individual specialization like Fenris' Lyrium Ghost, but I just really like personalized skill trees in general.)

However, having answered that question, connecting magic so closely to the very thing can be described as a “magical vibration that repels the Fade”, I'm curious about how it would work. Since, you know, mages are inevitably tied to the Fade. Wouldn't the Veil repel a try to manipulate it by a mage? Is using mana the same thing as drawing energy from the Fade? If so, it would be straight-up impossible to actually use such a method for any ordinary mage (read: not Solas). If mana can be used without the Fade, it would be possible, but is such a thing feasible? Can you switch between spells and Veil quickly enough without horrific consequences such as possibly tearing yourself apart?

Very interesting topic. Would love to go into it more, but at that point, I'd become subjective, so let's end it here.

To summarize: Rift mages do things (physically pulling things from the Fade plus using the Veil) normal mages don't do. There is also a chance, logically speaking, that no one else but Solas (or mage!Inquisitor) can accomplish such a feat without dying a horrific death.

Codex Entry

From "Power Bleeds: Harness the Flow." Your Trainer's words make one passage stand out:

There are no tomes dedicated to this manipulation. There has been no time for academics, only the practical—and not in a manner that mitigates risk. Power in a raw form has found an outlet, both visible and in ways that only we of arcane proclivity can sense. The risk is great.

An account:

From this page forward, these are the notes of Thelric. They began as the work of my mentor Julion, and I will continue in the research she began, as she cannot, because she is dead. The rift we were examining did not react well to her last investigation. We believed ourselves prepared for demonic manifestation. We were not prepared for how the energies we expected would be encountered. Well-versed in the forces that magic can produce, my senior was surprised by an alteration, a deviance. That which previously had to be coaxed is now a flood that must be staunched. The same amount in different intensity, quick to expose fault in the way it is accessed. She drew too much, expecting resistance. There was none, and her form suffered the brunt. Tread carefully in studies of new matters, for I cannot unsee the end of her.

Scattered symbols and sketches follow.

[source – DA wiki; bolding mine]

Apparently DA:I has a thing for hiding the true horror in Codex Entries and off-hand comments.

Here, we learn one key fact: The school of Rift Magic is relatively new ('no tomes dedicated to this manipulation'). I think it's safe to assume the possibility - and thus research concerning it - emerged around the time the Breach appeared. So it's new, people have no idea what they're doing, but it somehow works. A little like the whole time magic thing, funnily. (That brings me back to a lot of questions I have about the Veil: Just how powerful is it? Just how deeply is it intervened with Thedas?)

Reading further, the entry seems to (only) stress how dangerous Rift Magic is. Who would have thought! No, really, it's a fair point to empaphize. I'm not certain the Trainer and his previous teacher (or anyone else but Solas) know what kind of role the Veil plays in this, and so of course experiments are going to get ugly. The Veil holds a much greater importance than the people of Thedas realize.

And, in a very similar vein: The people of Thedas don't know much about directly interacting with the Fade through, say, a rift, which poses another risk. The wiki entry establishes two things in particular that are relevant here: Using spells (in the Fade itself) has unpredictable results, and one can draw unprecedented power from it while sleeping.

The codex entry cited above proves that. A rift is a direct connection to the Fade, and thus unpredictable ('She drew too much, expecting resistance. There was none') and that power is too much to handle ('her form suffered the brunt').

My theory is that, while a certain flunction is natural to the Fade, the Veil also plays a role here. Which I'm not sure. But it has one.

Personally, I wouldn't be sure the risks of a horrific death outweigh the benefits of power, but let's look more in depth at that!

Skills

Which brings me to the abilities themselves.

The first two you can choose from are Veilstrike and Stonefist. (Which I think should have had their names changed but, oh, well.)

Veilstrike: “You recreate your own fist from the essence of the Fade and smash nearby foes to the ground.” (Upgrades being Punched Down and Wounded Veil, but they don’t have anything interesting for this analysis. Note the names, though.)

Curious here is the 'recreate [...] from the essence of the Fade' part here. On first glance, it sounds like a rather ordinary spell, right? But it's not. That's just the 'hiding in plain sight for the first playthrough' aspect of Solas' character.

Mages do shape their spells with energy from the Fade (as far as my assumptions go). Maybe they can also recreate something. I'll give them that much. But the essence of the Fade - the inherit, unchanging nature of it - can't be manipulated by them. I think that's specifically a trait only Dreamers can have. (More evidence for my 'Rift Mage should have been Solas' personalized, individual specialization' hc!)

There is an argument to be made if this already constitutes for 'pulling matter from the Fade', but this isn't even the funkiest part yet.

Stonefist: “You summon a boulder from the Fade and smash it into your target, sending them flying.” (Upgrades being Shatterstone and Unblockable Force.)

'Summon a boulder from the Fade', you know, as in, bring physical matter from the Fade to the other side of the Veil. A thing that is pretty much unheard of. Remembers what happens to spirits when they pass violently through the Veil? There is an entire game dealing with that. (I mean, stones won't hopefully turn into demons, but my point is that bringing things through, usually, is not a wise idea.

Another thing someone could have commented on.

Passives: Restorative Veil, Encircling Veil, Smothering Veil, Twisting Veil.

Unfortunately, neither of these descriptions give me much, but they all have the ‘Veil’ component in their name, so that’s interesting.

Upon closer inspection, the Veil can function in a variety of ways: speeding up mana recovery, further weakening enemies, boosting your own damage. (Veilstrike being an example of a means of attack.)

Now, my question here would be: Do over mages notice changes in the Veil? Do they feel it shift and bend? If not, well, that's one thing. if they do, even subconsciously, I'd want banter. (I want a lot of banter, though. Just generally speaking.)

Pull of the Abyss: “You create a tiny rift that pulls enemies toward a central point.” (Upgrades being Shaken Veil and Devouring Veil.)

I can live with never hearing anything about everything else. Sure. But this one? This damned skill? You're telling me I read that the first time I played the game, nodded, and that was it?

'You can create a tiny rift-' I'm sorry, do you what now? After a good a couple of hours of learning just how bad rifts are?

And the upgrade names. Shaken Veil, Devouring Veil - is there anything this thing can't do, except for becoming more and more horrifying and giving me bad vibes ofr whatever DA4 will do with it?

Firestorm: “You summon flaming meteors, raining fire down upon enemies all over the area for the next several seconds. This ability consumes and is powered by focus.”

This one is ... honestly, I don't like it being here. It's an AOE skill, which does fit in with the rest, but it's fire and it seems rather randomly assigned compared to other focus abilities with a more personal note (Haste, Rampagne, Cloak of Shadows, Mark of the Rift).

Doesn't give a lot here to analyze, except that raining down flaming meteors is the level of (global) destruction I can see happening in the future if Solas isn't stopped. So. That's fun.

(It's the ultimate skill in the Fire/Ice tree in DA:II, or at least the ability there has the same name.)

DA: II Comparison

Nearing the end, I'll take a brief look at the Force Mage specialization from DA:II and the Primal base skill tree for mages. Both have some interesting similarities.

First, Primal.

Stonefist: “The mage hurls a stone projectile that strikes with massive force.”

It's only the name and the effect, honestly, but it is curious to see it in a skill tree that focuses exclusively on the elements earth and lightning. (Because Pride demons also use electricity ... yeah, yeah. I'm reading too much into this.)

Petrify: “The mage entombs an enemy in stone, leaving the foe temporarily unable to move. However, the target becomes more resistant to damage for the duration of the spell.”

This has nothing to do with Rift Mage, but in light of Trespasser, I'll just leave it here for your consideration. Petrifying people is neither new nor exclusive to Evanruis.

Now, onto Force Mage.

Fist of the Maker: “The mage slams enemies into the ground with incredible power, against which armor is no protection.”

The effect sounds like Stonefist (Primal) and Veilstrike.

Pull of the Abyss: “The mage conjures a maelstrom of energy that draws enemies to its center while slowing them to a crawl.”

This one is similar to the Rift Mage skill with the same name, so it might have served as an inspiration (or base).

Overall, though: nothing much to say here. Maybe I could talk more about Rift Mage being focused on crowd control, but that is probably for game-play balance. I could connect that to Solas' character and analyze every little thing to death. I'm not doing it, though.

Specialization Dialogue

Solas: You have begun practicing new magical forms. Interesting. You seem to be drawing upon the raw substance of the Fade, likely using your mark as a catalyst. I use similar techniques, although it took me years to learn that. Why did you choose such an esoteric area of study?

Inquisitor: (if chosen) I hoped that studying such magic would me help better understand the Fade.

Solas: While our fight affords little time for formal study, the wise can better themselves even in the midst of battle. Perhaps especially then. I hope your new studies serve you well.

[source]

Let’s go through this slowly.

‘You seem to be drawing upon the raw substance of the Fade-’ Alright, we’ve talked about that. Makes sense he’d comment on it. ‘likely using your mark as a catalyst’ Sorry? The Inquisitor is doing what? I’m not saying it’s not possible, I’m just saying it might not be an overly smart idea to use the Anchor in that way. Because it’s attached to the Inquisitor’s arm. And because the Inquisitor knows what happens if it snaps out of control. So, purposefully doing something that might cause you agonizing pain? Mh. Yeah. No, thanks.

Also. The 'drawing upon the raw substance of the Fade' part makes me think that the Anchor does give the Inquisitor Dreamer-like abilities. Forcefully, and possibly difficult to control, and the Inquisitor might not be aware of it, but. That would be an interesting aspect to explore.

‘I use similar techniques, although it took me years to learn that’. Well. Yeah. Mostly a sound response, except I’m not really sure it's true. Why does he say years? Because he didn’t go right to sleep after creating the Veil, or because he studied such methods theoretically beforehand? I doubt he refers to the time Inquisition spans, because it’s not that long, cannocially, (isn't it like ... a year? I forget what the devs said), but … I don’t know. It doesn't sit right with me. Solas never truly outright lies, so there is probably some merit in it.

‘Why did you choose such an esoteric area of study?’ That’s … an interesting way to ask. Sure, there is a very small group who has this specialized knowledge, but it feels a little like deflection.

The rest of the conversation doesn’t give much for me to analyze.

Conclusion

TL;DR: There should have been banter. Or Rift Mage should have been a personalized, individual specialization.

Pull of the Abyss is the funkiest skill in the entire game, from a meta-perspective, because tearing a hole into the Veil is the opposite of what the Inquisitor is trying to do.

There are also many more questions than answer to take away from this regarding the Veil and the Fade and how Solas manages not to blow his cover, but I believe there are theories about at least the two former points out there.

I thank you very much for bearing with me for this long!

#dragon age #dragon age meta #meta #rift mage #solas #analysis #rift mage specialization #skill tree #ability tree #analyzing game-play-elements for narrative purposes #long post #even for my standards

[nighttimepixels]

TALK TO US ABOUT MASS EFFECT I HAVE BEEN AN INSANE MASS EFFECT/SHAKARIAN TRASH PERSON SINCE 20-FUCKING-11 AND LEMME TELL YOU THOSE FEELINGS HAVENOT TARNISHED A SINGLE FRACTION IN THOSE TEN YEARS OH MY GOOOOOOODDDSSSS!!!!!!!

I DEMAND A PLAY-BY-PLAY UP TO THE MINUTE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO EVERYTHING!!!!

you are so valid and I totally see why everyone I've ever mentioned it to loves the hell out of it

aksdjlsdfj I meannnn if you want to hear my rambling about it then hell yeah

Okay, gonna put this below the cut to save everyone else XD also- since I'm not leaving this Mass Effect obsession anytime soon, if you're not interested in seeing occasional posts about it, please feel free to block the tag "night plays ME"~

(mild spoilers ahead??)

((also for real I mean it when I say this is rambling as hell lol, apologies and no stress if absolute no one reads all this))

OKAY SO Mass Effect 1-

Stars help me, I was honestly hooked right from the start?? Like even in Legendary Edition (the combined trilogy just re-released in one "can play it on one system + minor improvements", for anyone who doesn't know) where it's smoothed out, of course it's obvious that ME1 is a decade old... but the foundation for these relationships are all there and gods I love them already.

Like - Kaiden right off the top is a delightful good fightin lad, what the hell. I've heard that he's viewed as 'bland' by a good portion of the fan community but I dunno, he's a delight and even more complex by the time 2 rolls around and you encounter him on Horizon, it was honestly Ashley I was way more meh about - mostly because before you can learn about her family history/etc, she comes off as hella xenophobic and I was immediately offended for my growing space family that she didn't like/trust all the aliens around, pfff.

(she gets redeemed a bit through further actions/evolving thoughts, but I thought in retrospect it was a bummer that they didn't flip the order there, give her a chance to be liked before the complicating factor of being so rude about aliens >:c that then she could grow from... ah well. Apparently she has a good arc but uh, let's just say I chose Kaiden at the "key junction" in the latter part of the game so I won't be seeing anymore of Ashley uh... anytime soon, haha.)

Garrus??? Is??????? The ABSOLUTE best???????????

I liked him from the start, I'm always a bit of a sucker for a rogue-detective "the system won't bring this bastard to justice, so I've got to" type and all their moral shadiness XD But he just gets better, honestly, and where I'm at in ME2 (right before the Reaper IFF mission, as of typing this, with everyone's loyalty!) I am only digging myself deeper into this hole-

-*wheezing* okay anyways -

Wrex is AMAZING I love fightin' middle-aged krogan bastard, gods. Liara is great too, I'm a sucker for a wlw relationship (playing fem!Shepard, so) - buuuut I'll admit she's a bit more one-note in ME1. Last week while I was still on ME1 I remember hearing (while trying to dodge spoilers) that her arc is really good, though. I think they leaned a little hard on the 'innocent but sexy' sterteotype on her (so despite the yikes aspect of a few of the things I've learned in ME2, lol, I actually really like the complexity that's been added to her character.)

Saved Liara first, so by the time I got to Noveria and had the standoff with Benezia there was the chance to have emotions over Liara having to face her TwT and of course, I made the questionable but quality decision to free Queen Rachni heheh. no ragrets

More than a blow-by-blow of my choices though I totally wanna take the chance to say that even in the mild jankiness of ME1 (goddammit, the Mako.... please..... please just go up this impossible cliff I just want to resource hunt-) the way that the lore, both obvious/key to main plot and the lesser/filler/background/world-building kinds... I just love it. It incorporates it well, you can go ham in the codex learning more, or just dive into the basics - it's clearly a complex galaxy (and they do an even better job in 2 of fleshing it out further), and it never really felt overwhelming. It was pretty natural figuring it all out-!

Plus the interesting implications of resource hunting amongst the sapient races, and the little side missions you better bet I did every one of- there's so much rich depth in the story if you do 'em!! (And that lead with that Keeper side mission...? Looking back, damn, clever foreshadowing-!!!)

And oh my gods, Ilios??? hell yeah. I loved that mission so much, especially having Garrus & Kaiden with me when talking to the hologram/computer, and more than anything, that last sprint in the Mako trying to get to the jump before it closed-???

yeet the boi-

Also mannn I love a good setpiece, and having to go up the side of the elevator, space-side?? such a cool setup!!

Plus it felt good having been Paragon enough (as simple as the good v bad vibe system is, I don't hate it, lol) to avoid one of the Saren fights, ngl. And the er, "second fight" with Sovereign-Saren.... hell yeah

... I'll admit I had to double check my choice re whether to save the Council. I did in the end, but I swear, sometimes the way they phrase things I'm like ".... okay but Garrus is right, defeating Sovereign is more important than these few leaders??????" woops. Listen, priorities, is all I'm saying..... (￣ヮ￣|||)ゞ

'Course later they emphasize (in ME2) that there were 10,000 people on that same ship and I was like well I wouldn't have second guessed if I'd known that, I mean c'mon-

Also I did indeed romance Liara in this one, so I got that scene ;Dc But,,,, I also knew by the end that I was totally gonna romance Garrus in 2 since he's an option then finally,,,,, lemme tell you the guilt as I waffled over whether to romance Liara bc of it. hahaha.

Aaaaand Mass Effect 2-

So I'm only up to right before the Reaper IFF Mission, so I don't know the ending, etc etc lol. That said, I've just finished every side mission I've found with the exception of the Shadowbroker Quest and the Arrival Quest (I've heard the latter basically leads into ME3, and the former is best either right before the Omega 4 jump or in postgame).

So from the start - fuck yeah fuck yeah what a high adrenaline start Shepard noooooo but also yes save Joker aH-

The motion comic too hot damn nice job

I loved this setup, seriously - especially forcing Shep into this situation, having to work with/for Cerberus, and the compelling reasoning given behind "why" they do what they do (I especially found it a good point that the Salarians have the Task Force, the Asaris the Commandos, the Turians the- etc... like, true, when you put it like that, having a similar group advancing human interests/solving human interstellar problems is pretty reasonable...). That said, I love too that it really isn't shied away from how Cerberus is nonetheless fucked up - or its at least done fucked up stuff.

Listen, I still think some messed up stuff is gonna be revealed in 2's endgame......... after that Horizon mission and the Collector's ship???? TIM I SEE YOU YOU SHADY MF-

aaanyways lol...

I'm so so glad on a gameplay level they nixed the Mako style exploration. A few Hammerhead missions are fine and a lot more focused than the slippery ass navigation in that glorified ATV, pfff. The probes are a neat way of getting after similar resources - and more importantly, having good levels and some good hubs (the Zakera Wards, Omega, Ilium, etc) is way way more fun than having a more 'sprawling' space that is.... a lot of empty nonsense, lol.

Then there's the fact that we get Joker right off the bat and you can interact with him so much - and him and EDI??? Get out gods I love them. Kasumi is so right when she says they sound like a bickering old married couple lol. I have a terrible feeling that some shit is gonna happen with EDI..... but I don't think she's evil as-is, at least.

Side-eying the hell out of those "access forbidden" parts of her that she doesn't even know.... and the fact that her AI core has a locked door access................... something's gonna happen gdi LEAVE OUR ADOPTED AI ALONE.

(Also Joker pls stop fracturing your thumb on the mute button)

Also please save me there are so many hot aliens in this game,,,,, the xeno/monsterfuckers really comin' through strong in the sequels............... doin' the lord's work........................................

In general, I love how many levels ME stepped up in two with complexity and interwoven narratives!! Like, to the point it'd be almost a drag to replay ME1, even though it was fun going through it (if occasionally a bit tedious with the cookie cutter rando planet science/mine facilities, lol). Like, just from how fun and interesting ME2 is, mostly! more of all the pre-introduced races, plus new ones, plus more filling in of intragalactic politics, and more interesting implications of all these space-faring races mixing....

Also gods WREX and his planet holy shit,,,,, fuckin' hell yeah my man get their shit together and also adopt Grunt yes good-

And Mordin??? My singing semi-evil scientist best friend forced to confront his choices more than he thought he ever would have???? With some of the best ongoing general report chatter of all the companions??

(when I tell you I choked on my coffee when I talked to him after confirming romance choice w/ Garrus and that 'pamphlet' and 'anaphalactic shot if ingesting-' kajsldkfjsldfjk)

Like, fuck, the fact that they actually dive into the mixed morality and horrors of the genophage, and you can confront Mordin on it, for good reason, yet he still stands his ground, until finally some bits of his loyalty mission seem to... affect him, and I'm guessing might set up things for 3 with him? Unsure, but either way, damn, the fact that they start to dig into it...

And Taliiiii my beloved forbidden alien wife TwT her loyalty mission was SO GOOD. I love how varied they all are?? Getting to defend her and discover what she'd unwittingly been a part of-!!

Zaeed is a bastard but tbh I love that he is and that he's unapologetic in him - and Kasumi omg, best thief. A heist?? Gods, yes- I love our couch lounge chats XD

Samara is..... illegally.......... she's an illegally powerful and beautiful and eloquent MILF...........................

(.... listen I'm sapphic as hell and I'm kicking my own ass for picking her up last aksjdlfksjdfl - but her loyalty mission, damn. And seeing how there's this interesting cultural subset, and the struggle with the Asari in that they unquestioningly accept/respect justicars, but also know that the impact outside their culture is a diplomacy nightmare waiting to happen-)

,.,,,,,T,,, Thane,,,,,

I am weak for morally implicated murder dads okay?? And that voice??? His mannerisms?????? How you first see him, and that prayer after assassinating her...???????? And his history/his people's history with the hanar, gods I love how messy it is, it feels so much more real!

Also Jack is a mess and I love her (and want to get her some therapy, omg), and her and Miranda nearly duking it out after you've done both their loyalty missions??? so good and makes a lot of sense-! Honestly I would love more interactions between teammates on the ship, but there's already so much the devs had to balance I can't blame 'em for minimizing, heh. But suffice to say I also love Miranda and Jacob, even if I'm softest for my alien crew XD Hell yeah Jacob, we'll get loud and spill drinks on the citadel indeed TwT

.... I could write a whole essay on how much I love Garrus oTL Perhaps because he and Tali are the throughlines from 1 on your 2 crew, I have some of the strongest feelings about them... but genuinely, he was one of my favorite companions in the first game, and how you find him as Archangel in two? Getting to help him fight his way out after he's gone nearly 48 hours straight fighting off three gangs alone, jfc. His vengeance quest and what can happen there.... That line? fuck me, that line -

It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey? I don't know what to do with gray...

How DARE you come for my heart like this, devs holy shit

(also, some other choice faves so far from the series from him include We can disobey suicidal orders?? and This wasn't in my training manual... [in 1, if you have him with you @ th Thorian fight] and his whole.... pop the heat sink - in his romance ;Dc)

asdasdfksadjfkl like I said I can write an essay on him PFFF suffice to say I'm very looking forward to his romance scene and where things go in 3

But yeah gods I'm just gonna keep rambling if I'm not careful lol. Gods I don't even know what to talk about it's all so good and while I can understand people roasting the obviousness of Paragon V Renegade (v neutral) choices/alignments, I think they do a pretty damn good job in 2 of pushing it further - to the point that there were some times that I accidentally got renegade points and I wasn't that mad, haha. There's so much fun in the interactions that I just have a good time anyways~

I have so many thoughts about TIM (The Illusive Man) and Cerberus.... theories evolving galore............... and like, what the hell!! Omega 4 going to the center of the galaxy is such a cool twist, goddamn - though my heart still breaks at losing Kaiden (his line if you haven't romanced him?? about feeling like he lost a limb when he lost you??? holy shit.... but I also can't blame him for not trusting Cerberus to the point of it affecting his ability to trust Shepard... like fuck Shep go after himmmm) I'm really excited to see where that goes since he comes back in 3, and what the fuck happens with Cerberus bc while I love the fact that obviously there are a lot of people in it for the right reasons, doing good work, there are those that are doing the opposite, and I have a very bad feeling about where TIM will end up landing....

All that said though I need to do the Reaper IFF mission (where I'm lightly spoiled as to getting That Boy, but not how/what happens to make it so - just that it's apparently wise to have all your side missions done before getting him...) and the actual Omega 4 jump. So we'll see what happens and what I think about it from there heheh!

.... major kudos and genuine props if you made it here to the end, I am so sorry for not editing on condensing all this, and appreciate you so much ;w;

#night answers #night plays ME #(yes that's a purposeful pun lol) #((i sure have played myself by starting this series its so good aksdjflskjfd))

[cozyforjate]

MacGyver 5x01

After the long wait MacGyver has returned with a kickass premiere. And because the wait was too long, my review will be long too! So you are warned.

The episode was great. Loved the John Wick references, the storyline was solid, pacing was good, action scenes were brilliant and the fight choreographies are getting better and better each season so this episode also did not that dissapoint on that front. And bcoz i missed all the characters so freaking much, having them back felt so good.

Vincent is probably one of my favorite guest stars ever on this show. Loved the humor he brought to the scenes and i think he had great chemistry with both Russ and Mac. I wasn’t even sorry that he double crossed them coz he did it so smoothly! LOL

In another life Mac and Vincent could have been best buddies!

Girls Team & Boys Team

One of the things i loved about this episode was the “tension” between the characters. I was glad to see that the whole Codex mess wasn’t glossed over.

It was nice to see Mac-Russ and Riley-Desi trying to save the day while dealing with their “trust issues”.

I really loved the paralel storytelling between Boys Team and Girls Team.

Last time it was MacRiley vs RussDesi… And now Matty mixes the teams so that they could regain some of the trust that was lost between them. I love you BOSS LADY!

Now this episode might have been “perfect” if it could have handled the Riley-Desi resolution better. I enjoyed how Mac-Russ made things work in the end. Russ already apologized Mac in 4x13 but in this episode we saw that his trust issues and paranoia were still going on. And Mac was having a hard time working with a guy that tried to “kill” him. DUH!

It was so good to see Mac saying everything that is needed to be said and in the end Russ finally realized the wrong in his behaviour and let Mac know that he has his trust from now on.

Riley&Desi

But IMO things didn’t end in a satisfying way for the Girls Team. The writers trying to “soften” Desi’s behaviour in 4x12 by throwing some of the guilt on Riley, left a bad taste in my mouth.

Desi says she could have joined Riley if she would have let her in on her plan.

And this is 100% NOT TRUE.

Lets remember 4x12 very quickly…

Mac’s gone rogue. Russ tells the team Mac is now an enemy of the state. Desi sides with Russ. Matty and Bozer are neutral. Riley tries to reason with everyone on the team.

“Guys, is this really neccessary?”

“Mac does everything for a reason.”

“Mac doesn’t have an evil bone in his body.”

While Riley tries to make Desi & the team change their minds about Mac, what does Desi do?: 

That’s not my interpretation guys, that’s canon. That is what happened in 4x12.

So we all know that Riley letting Desi in on her plan could only end with Desi stopping her. Desi’s mind was set, she didn’t trust Mac and she wanted nothing but to stop him. Let’s not change history!

Besides, why did Desi need Riley’s plan, couldn’t she come up with her own to save Mac if that’s what she really wanted to do?

So as you see, Riley apologizing to Desi was total BS. Desi was the only one who needed to say sorry and unfortunately the best she could do was to say “she regretted her choices”…  I think once again writers missed the opportunity for some character development for Desi. Desi needs to OWN her mistakes alone without other characters’ HELP.

The triangle

Because i’m an obssesed fan who likes to delve more deeply into the characters, i rewatched this episode and here’s the conclusion i’ve come:

Desi is angry and resentful. But not just angry at Riley but herself too. She says she regrets not being there for Mac and Riley. She knows she should have trusted Mac and messed up!

But i also sensed some jealously there. By the end of 4x13 Desi’s anger towards Mac seemed to dissapear. So why was Desi angry at Riley in 5x01?

Because as Mac’s girlfriend she should have been the one by his side when it really mattered.

Because as Mac’s partner, she should have been the one risking it all to protect him.

But it was Riley who did all that.

That’s why she’s projecting all her anger on Riley. Because she is jealous. And i think Riley noticed that too. Our queen is very perceptive especially when it comes to reading people’s emotions.

Throughout the episode she tried to make things work with Desi. But Desi blocked all her attempts. And when Desi opened up, Riley realized that there is a much deeper wound under all that anger. That’s probably why she apologized. It was Riley’s way of making things work. Riley was the bigger person here. She wanted peace, she needed a solution. So she said sorry

Back to Desi’s “jealousy”… When she asked Riley why she followed Mac, she was totally fishing for another answer.

Desi is not stupid she already knows the obvious answer. Riley followed Mac bcoz she trusted him. But that’s not what she was searching for. She asked the question to read Riley’s expressions and body language. And Riley felt that too… But bcoz our queen is a true queen she delivered the best line of the episode:

“Because i trust Mac. Question is why didn’t you?”

This line is heavy people! Riley counterattacks Desi. She is basically saying “Instead of interrogating me about my feelings how about you question yours?”

This episode might have resolved the Codex tension, but the triangle is still a reality. Both girls have feelings for Mac, so there’ll be more tension/awkwardness between them. Better get ready!

Timejump

10 months and a pandemic since Codex, huh?

We all know that the writers added that line and the information about Phoenix being shut down to fit the new episodes to a pandemic world. But for die-hard fans like us, it’s not working. The characters are acting like Codex happened yesterday, Riley recently moved to a new place which she was looking for in 4x11…

So i’m gonna ignore the 10 month time jump coz i know that the additional episodes weren’t designed that way.

Honourable mention

1 to 10, how hot was the opening scene? *cough 11 cough*

It was literally and figuratively HOT.

I really wanted and expected Mac’s towel to drop at some point. Obviously dissapointed when it didn’t! LMAO 

Untill next week

To end my weekly MacGyver ramblings; i can say that i’m ok with the team resolving the tension. The episodes we are watching now were actually written as a continuation of season 4. Probably back in the day the writers didn’t want to keep the dark-tense episodes going forever so they needed to put an end to that and move to lighter and more fun dynamic.

#MacGyver #macgyver reboot #Angus MacGyver #riley davis #macriley #mac x riley #desi nguyen

[sterekruinedme]

It's been a long time (without you)

on AO3

"You trust him. No, it's more than that. It is worse than that! You believe in him."

Barry was still staring at the door where Snart had just left when Iris' voice cut through him. "Iris-", he tried to placate her, but she cut him off. "He kidnapped Caitlin. And Cisco. And he hurts people! And yet you still believe in him!"

Barry sighed. He was suddenly very exhausted. "It is not like that, okay? We have a deal. He even saved my life!" Barry wasn't sure why they were even fighting about this. It's not like he was teaming up with Captain Cold again. Cold had just been there to warn him of Madon and the Trickster.

"Oh yes, he saved your life! And then he betrayed you!"

Barry sighed again. "Why are we fighting about this?", he asked. Iris's shoulders slumped and she finally uncrossed her arms. The fire in her eyes was still burning, but she seemed calmer now. "I just don't trust him."

Barry could feel his lips twitching. "I appreciate the concern. But Cold put himself at quite a risk to break into the house of a metahuman and a cop, so I'm just gonna trust him on this. Plus, he owed me one, and despite everything Cold has a codex. And he hates being in someone's depth. This is probably just his messed up way of saying thank you for saving his sister's life."

Iris huffed but relented. "He was right about the hot chocolate, you know? It's not the same without marshmallows."

.

Barry couldn't help but feel slightly smug. Leonard Snart had joined the Legends. Barry knew there was good in him. He knew it! The news made something warm expand in his chest. He inhaled sharply when he realized it was pride. He was proud of Snart for doing the right thing.

"What are you so happy about?", Iris asked from where she was sitting on the couch. For one ridiculous second Barry wanted to hide the postcard he had found in the post from her eyes. But then he reminded himself that it was just a postcard. And this was Iris he was talking to.

"Oh, uhm, it's a postcard. From Snart." He couldn't help but fidget as he watched Iris's eyebrows shoot upwards. "Captain Cold sent you a postcard?!", her voice went high with disbelief, and Barry winced.

"Yes?", he didn't mean for it to sound like a question. "He joined the Legends. The postcard is from 1989, I guess he thought it would be funny." Barry looked down at the postcard again, warmth flooding his chest at the caption: I guess you were right. Don't let it get to your head, kid. Cold.

When he looked up from the postcard again Iris was studying him silently. He knew that look on her face and he really did not like it. "He wrote you a postcard. And it is from the year you were born?" Barry could feel his cheeks flame. "Uhm yeah?" The hand that wasn't holding the postcard was now awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. It was a nervous habit he had wanted to get rid of, but apparently he couldn't. It took all of his willpower not to start fidgeting under Iris's scrutinizing gaze anyway.

"Look, I know you don't like him, but it is just a postcard, okay?" He tugged the offending piece of mail into his pocket and crossed the room to sit down on the couch as well. Iris was still looking at him like that. Like he was a mystery she wanted to solve, a particularly interesting piece of information she had not considered before. She looked at him like she sometimes looked at a piece of evidence for one of her articles.

"Of course, sorry. Let's just watch the game, okay?", she asked but her voice was still off. She let Barry pull her close, but he could tell that her thoughts were miles away.

"Barry?"

He had not noticed that Iris had entered the room. If she was back from work already then he really must have been sitting here for a while now.

"Barry? Are you okay?" He hummed and turned to look at her. Something about his appearance must have thrown her off because suddenly Iris hesitated to come closer to him

Maybe he should get up from the floor. His knees were starting to hurt from kneeling for so long.

"What happened?", Iris asked and Barry knew that fear in her voice all too well. She was expecting bad news, the kind of news that would leave him powerless on the floor of their bedroom.

"It's just-", his voice sounded raw even to his own eyes and he couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence. It wasn't "just" Snart's death. He swallowed and forced himself off the floor. "Snart's dead."

Barry saw the moment the words registered with Iris, saw how surprised she was to see him in this state over his dead enemy. But he wasn't just an enemy, was he? Cold had become an ally.

"Oh." Iris was staring at him with that look again and then her eyes flickered to his hands. He was still holding the postcard Snart had written him. "Oh", Iris repeated again and something shifted in her eyes. "He meant something to you, didn't he?" Her voice was careful now like he was a spooked animal that needed to be soothed.

"I-", Barry's first instinct was to deny that, but that would be ridiculous. "He was an ally, of course I care if he is dead. Especially if it is because I pushed him to become a hero." He said, his shoulders sagging under the realization that if maybe he hadn't pushed Snart to become a hero, he might still be alive.

"Barry, whatever happened to Cold is not your fault. He made his own choices, you know that better than anyone."

"I know", Barry mumbled and refused to look Iris into the eyes.

.

"Why HIM?", Iris had asked and Barry was asking himself the same thing now. He tried to justify his actions with the fact that Snart was the best thief he knew and that time was running out, but he had also missed the older man. He had missed their banter and the slow drawl of his voice and-

And he knew that he could trust him.

Snart proved him right when he refused to let Barry murder King Shark and he knew that he would be grateful for that when the dust had finally settled. The fact that Snart could read him so well, actually knew him well enough to know what he was planning and to come up with a different plan made something warm settle in his stomach.

Barry couldn't leave him in there with ARGUS agents sure to arrive any second and King Shark still on the other side of the door. No matter how much Snart taunted him, he could hear how scared he was in his voice, in the way it shook when he said his name. It felt an awful lot like he had to choose between Snart and Iris, but he just could not bring himself to leave him there. He had promised Iris he would do anything to save her, but he could not do this.

And Lyla just had to call him out on it, didn't she? She might be fooled into thinking that Barry was just a good person, a hero, too good to sacrifice somebody for his own gain. But Barry was not so sure about that. If it had been somebody else behind that door, somebody he cared about less, he might have left them there. He felt sick just thinking about it, but he couldn't stop. He didn't recognize who he was becoming.

Snart hit too close to home when he called Barry on it as well. He had not been sure if Barry would save him and that cut deeper than it should have. "I see the bad in you", he said but it almost sounded admiring. Almost. But then Snart put his hand on his shoulder and looked at him with that intense gaze. "Call me sentimental, but I think the Flash should always be a hero." Barry swallowed and had to avert his eyes, a private smile playing around his lips.

He suddenly wished he could just tell him. Tell Snart how he would die, save him somehow but he knew that that was impossible. "Be careful, Snart."

"There are no strings on me", Snart drawled and Barry smiled sadly at him. He knew how untrue that was, how attached to his team Snart would become. Attached enough to sacrifice himself for them.

He heaved a sigh and turned away from him, suddenly aching to get back to his own time, to get away from Snart's piercing gaze.

.

After everything was over and the dust had finally settled, after almost losing Iris, after having thought her lost, Barry felt completely drained. He dreaded the conversation he would have to have with Iris. About who he had almost become. He dragged himself out of bed with a sigh.

Iris was sitting at the kitchen table with her laptop, but she looked up when Barry entered. They had been tiptoeing around each other for a few days now, the air between them always charged with too much tension.

"Hey", Barry mumbled, awkwardly rubbing his neck.

"Hi", Iris closed her laptop and took a deep breath. "I think we need to talk." Barry huffed and sat down across from her. "I think you are right." "Look, there is something I didn't tell you. When Snart and I broke into ARGUS, things went really wrong for a second and I had to make a choice. I had to choose between leaving him there to fend for himself and getting back to you." Barry trailed of and hesitated, flicking his eyes to Iris and back down.

"Barry, I am not mad that you didn't sacrifice Captain Cold for me, if that is what you are worried about. Everything worked out and I am fine", her voice was soft and reassuring, but Barry swallowed hard and forced himself to look at her. "It's not that. I-, if it was anybody else, I-" He took a shaky breath. "I considered it. I considered leaving him there but I couldn't. I couldn't bring myself to do it. But if it had been somebody else in there with me, I think I would have. I would have sacrificed them. And that scares me."

"Do you have feelings for him, Barry?", Iris asked after a beat. "Is that what you are trying to tell me?"

Barry shook his head so fast, he was sure Iris only saw a blur. "No, my feelings for Snart don't matter." And shit, that-

That was not what he had meant to say at all. "I mean I don't have any! And that's why they don't matter." Didn't he though? A small nagging voice whispered in his mind, sounding annoying familiar but no-

He would deal with that question later. Not that it really mattered, because Snart was gone and he wasn't coming back and Barry should have warned him, he-

He put his head in his hands and just focused on breathing for a moment before he looked at Iris again. "What scares me is what I would do for you. Savitar only existed because I turned to darkness after you died. I would have killed somebody to save you. Since I was a little kid, I always thought that you would be the answer to all of my problems, that if we would be together everything would be alright."

He smiled sadly at Iris, who was staring at him with sad eyes. "I love you, I do! I just think I was so blinded by the fantasy, so in love with the perfect future I imagined for us that I became obsessed with it and that made me dangerous."

"You love me. You just aren't in love with me." Iris concluded with a bitter twist to her mouth. She had always known him too well. There were tears in her eyes and Barry could feel his own emotions welling up as well.

"Not anymore. I don't know what happened. But I do know that I love you."

"Just not like that", Iris finished for him and Barry nodded.

Iris slid the ring of her finger, the tears were running down her cheeks now. "I am so sorry", Barry whispered, but Iris shook her head. "It's not your fault. You can't help how you feel."

.

The weeks after the break-up were a blur. Joe didn't understand and his team treated him like he was fragile or perhaps going insane, so he mostly spent his time alone to avoid the pity and confusion and awkwardness.

The postcard had somehow found his way onto his nightstand when he had unpacked after moving out. He had used it as a bookmark at first, but now it was permanently residing there with the text facing upwards.

Admitting to himself that Iris had been right had been uncomfortable at best. Somewhere along the line, Barry had developed feelings for Snart. Sometimes he stared at the postcard and mourned what could have been. But he always shook himself out of it, because no matter what he might have felt, he was still an enemy to the older man. So instead, he focused on figuring out his sexuality.

He googled a lot and found some ridiculous buzzfeed quizzes before he found a forum for the lgbt community. The members were welcoming and open to answering his questions and he soon found a label that fit; bisexual.

Coming out was surprisingly easy. Joe simply hugged him tight and promised that this didn't change anything. Cisco simply said "cool" and high-fived him. Iris smiled sadly at him but gave him a hug nevertheless.

.

Months later Barry found himself at Saints and Sinners of all places. His feet had somehow carried him to the bar. The same bartender who had been here all those months ago was still behind the bar and Barry sat down with a heavy sigh. The bartender eyed him for a second before her face dawned with recognition. "Oh hey kid, Cold isn't here today."

Barry swallowed and tried his best to smile. No, of course he wasn't. He wouldn't ever be here again. "No, yeah, I know." This was probably a stupid idea. What had he been thinking? He could get into seriously trouble with his boss for just being in this bar. Barry shook his head. "I don't know why I'm here, I should probably go." He hadn't even ordered a drink yet, not that it would make a difference, but he left a tip anyway and turned to leave.

On his way out he bumbed into somebody and looked up to apologize only to freeze. Standing before him was Lisa Snart. She was eyeing him suspiciously and fuck- Barry really hoped that Len had kept his word and also that Lisa hadn't figured it out yet. "Oh, you're Cisco's friend", she said after a moment. Then her smile turned sharper and she cocked her hip. "How is Cisco?"

"Fine, he's fine. Excuse me", Barry mumbled and stumbled out of the bar.

.

Shyla was just bringing him his drink into the backroom when Lisa sauntered in with unmasked glee on her face. "Cisco's cute friend was just here. You know, the one that looks like bambi? Do you think he might bring Cisco with him sometime? Or maybe I should ask him for Cisco's number if he comes back?"

"Bambi? Oh yeah Len, the kid that bothered you a few times last year, do you remember him? He left when I told him you weren't here", Shyla cut in and Len saw the gears turning in Lisa's head. Oh no.

"Wait. Those bambi eyes. THAT kid is the Flash?!", Lisa exclaimed as soon as Shyla was gone. Len rubbed his temple. He could feel a headache coming on. "Yes."

Lisa had crossed her arms, but she was smirking now. "I can see why you were so obsessed with him. He is exactly your type, isn't he?" Len only glared at her. "Does he know that you are", she trailed off and vaguely waved her hands in his direction.

"Back from the dead?", he finished her question. "No."

Lisa frowned. "Why not?"

Len sighed heavily. He swore he could feel the headache intensifying. "Let him enjoy his wedded bliss before the announcement of his nemesis returning ruins his fun", he drawled but he knew that Lisa had always been able to look straight through him.

"He looked really sad, you know?", she said carefully. "There must be a reason why he came to Saints and Sinners. He could have gone anywhere."

Len knew what Lisa was implying but the thought of the Flash missing him was simply absurd. He remembered the last time he had seen the man vividly after all, remembered the fear and betrayal he had felt when the hero had nearly left him in the cell with that horrifying shark creature, remembered the resignation that of course the Flash would sacrifice him for his precious fiance, hell he had taunted him with his ruthlessness just moments before.

He also remembered the bone-deep relief when Scarlett had turned back for him.

Len snorted. "He is probably glad I am gone." He tried to sound cold and aloof, but his voice betrayed him halfway through. Lisa only raised her eyebrows at him.

.

"He is not married. He is actually very very single", Lisa announced when she strolled into his safe-house days later.

Len had been on the verge of taking a very much deserved nap, but now he groaned and sat up on the couch. "What?"

Lisa smirked. "He is single."

Len sighed. "Ramon? Congrats. Now, if you would be so kind", he made a shooing motion with his hand.

Lisa's smirk only widened. "No, your little Bambi. He isn't married." Lisa sat down on the couch next to him. "He is very single."

Len only gaped at her for a moment, before he exploded: "I'm sorry WHAT?" For a moment he was afraid that something had gone wrong, that Iris had died. It certainly would explain why Barry had been so sad.

"They called the engagement off a while ago", Lisa continued. "So Iris-?"; Len asked with bated breath.

"She is fine", Lisa confirmed and then just looked at him.

Len couldn't help but feel irritated. So he had risked his life to save Barry's precious fiance and then they hadn't even tied the knot?

"Are you okay?", Lisa asked tentatively. Len looked at her flatly and forced himself to smirk. "Peachy."

Maybe he would feel better if he checked on Barry, saw the situation for himself. It's not like he was worried for the speedster, he just wanted to know what had happened. One little visit to Starlabs surely couldn't hurt-

No. He had promised himself he would stay away from metahumans and heroes. He had no desire to get himself killed again.

.

"Bambi is here again", Shyla announced as she entered the back room where Len was going over some plans.

"I told you to stop calling him that", Len grit out but the bartender only looked amused. She had known him for way too long to feel threatened by him and they were both keenly aware of it.

"I think he is looking for something." Shyla's tone was poignant. "He isn't going to find it here", he grumbled.

"I wouldn't be so sure of that. Something keeps him coming back. Or someone." Len ignored her raised eyebrow and glared at her. Shyla glared right back. "He doesn't know I'm-", he gestured vaguely, "back."

"Back from the dead, you mean? Oh, that's right, because you had a second chance at life and you spent it hiding away and planning small robberies you never actually go through with. What are you so afraid of?"

Len gritted his teeth. "Thank you Shyla, that will be all."

.

In the end, Len couldn't stay away. He had never been good at denying himself the things he wanted and he wanted Ba-

He wanted to see what was up with the speedster.

Looking back he really should have known that following a metahuman -and it wasn't stalking, shut UP Lisa- would be a bad idea. Barry had him pressed against the alley wall before Len could even register what was happening.

"Who the fuck are you? Why are you following me?", the speedster hissed, making Len raise both eyebrows.

"Now, now Scarlett. What a very rude way to greet an old friend." Len smirked as he lowered his hood, but he was wholly unprepared for the sound Barry made, a choked gasp followed by an angry, feral growl. "Do you think this is fucking funny? What the fuck are you, huh? A shapeshifter of some kind?", he sounded breathless.

"Hey, Barry, it really is me." Len made sure to keep his voice gentle. This certainly was not how he had imagined their reunion. Not that he had imagined it.

"No, you died. They told me, you-" Barry sounded as breathless as Len felt.

"Surprise?"

Barry narrowed his eyes at him. "Prove it. Prove that you are him."

"I wrote you a postcard. Sent it to you from the year you were born", Len said quickly, still pinned to the wall by Barry, but the other man only scoffed.

"You could have just broken into my apartment and seen it there."

For a moment Len was speechless. "You-" He swallowed. "You kept it?"

Barry's grip on him loosened some, but he was still eyeing Len suspiciously.

Len sighed. "Fine. The last time I saw you, I told you the Flash should always be a hero."

Barry's arms fell lifelessly to his side and he stumbled a step back. "You're alive", Barry whispered and Len laughed because duh-

"And you're not married. What happened there, huh? After I risked my life for your precious fiance...", Len trailed off. He had not been able to keep the venom out of his voice.

Barry flushed and ducked his head. Len observed with great interest as his blush spread down his neck. "Yeah, Iris and I didn't work out."

Len tilted his head to the side. "Mmh, it's a shame really. The least she could have done after you saved her life, was not break your heart."

"She, uh, she didn't." If anything Barry flushed an even deeper shade of red and Len needed a second to catch up with what the speedster had implied.

"YOU broke HER heart?", he all but yelled. Then, forcing himself to calm down and not get his hopes up,"Oh my, it seems like we have a lot of catching up to do, Scarlett."

.

Barry couldn't believe it. Leonard Snart was alive. They were sitting at a table at Saints and Sinners of all places. Snart had ordered them both a beer, although he knew that would not do anything for Barry, and there was a plate of fries on the table. It almost felt like a date. That thought made Barry want to laugh just a little hysterically. After all, they had been in this exact position before, and that had definitely not been a date.

Snart had suggested this bar to "catch up" and Barry hadn't even thought about saying no. But now the older man was just looking at him, studying him, while Barry felt like vibrating out of his skin. "How did you-, When-, I mean how long have you been-"

Snart smirked at him. "Breathe Barry."

If he heard the way Barry's breath caught at the use of his name, Snart ignored it. "I've been back for a while now", Snart said, but didn't offer any other information. "And you never thought to mention that you were alive? We all thought you were dead!"

Snart levelled him with a cool look. “Why? So I could let myself be dragged into the superhero life and die again?” His voice was controlled, but there was an emotion in his eyes that Barry could not decipher.

Barry shook his head. “No. Just so that I could know you were alive. I was sorry to hear that you had died.” He hesitated. “I missed you, Snart.”

Snart snorted and shook his head. “I know you are a hero kid, but even your heart cannot be so pure that you missed your archnemesis.” There was a playful lilt in his voice, but the same indecipherable emotion was still in his eyes.

Barry swallowed. “You know you were never my archnemesis. That was Thawne”, he said, aiming for playful but missing. “I’d like to think that we weren’t even enemies, at the end.” Barry stared at the table, fidgeting uncomfortably in his seat. Maybe that was all that Snart ever thought of him; that he was his enemy, the annoying metahuman that always thwarted his plans.

“What would you call us then, Barry? Friends?” Barry didn’t have to lift his eyes to know that Snart was smirking unkindly. His voice had hardened. Barry didn’t know what he had done, but he was certain that he had pissed the older man off somehow.

Still, he swallowed nervously and said softly:” I’d like to think we could have been.”

Snart scoffed. “Wake up, Barry.”

“Don’t treat me like some dumb little kid”, Barry growled and finally looked into Snart’s eyes again. He had enough of the older man acting like he didn’t care. “You’ve been calling me Barry all night. What’s up with that?”

For a second Snart’s carefully crafted façade broke, before he was back to smirking at Barry.

“That is your name, isn’t it?”, Snart asked innocently.

Barry huffed. “Yes. My first name. No ‘Scarlett’ or ‘kid’ or even ‘Allen’. You’ve been calling me Barry since we sat down.”

Snart glared at him and shifted in his seat. His gaze flickered across the room, before landing on his beer. He shrugged and drained what was left of his drink in one go, before turning back to Barry. “You really want to go there today, huh? Alright, fine, let’s go there. Tell me, Barry. Why aren’t you married?”

That wasn’t a conversation Barry was ready to have, not with Snart, and definitely not sober. He sighed and looked sadly at his beer, wishing desperately that he could get drunk.

.

Len didn’t know what he had expected when he had suggested that Barry and he should catch up, but it certainly wasn’t this. Barry looked like he wanted to drown himself in alcohol or run away. Or both. If Len hadn’t been feeling like things were about to spiral out of control, he might have enjoyed this. Still, he couldn’t help but fluster the speedster just a tiny bit more. “Oh, and call me Len”, he said and winked at Barry.

For a moment Barry just stared at him, opening and closing his mouth as if unsure how to even begin answering Len. Then, he dropped his gaze back to the table and shrugged. “Iris and I just didn’t work out.”

Len snorted unattractively. “The love of your life? And it just didn’t work out? Somehow I find that hard to believe.”

Barry blushed and mumbled something that Len didn’t catch. “I’m sorry, what was that?”

He could see the speedster’s jaw clench in frustration, but then Barry finally raised his gaze again and stared straight at Len. Oh, how he had missed the fire in Barry’s eyes. “I said she is not the love of my life.” He shrugged, but levelled Len with a smirk. “I figured out that I wasn’t in love with her. I was in love with this perfect idea of her, but she deserves better than somebody who is obsessed with this perfect marriage because he saw it in a stupid time machine.” At Len’s confused frown, Barry shrugged. “Long story. Anyway, you actually helped me figure that out.”

Now it was Len’s turn to be speechless. He stared at Barry, waiting for the younger man to explain what he had meant.

“You know when the door closed and you were locked in with King Shark, I really scared myself. For a moment I hesitated. If it had been anybody else I might have left them there and-“ Barry sighed, a frustrated and helpless little sound, and raked his hand through his hair, before catching Len’s eyes again. “That is just not somebody I ever wanted to be. It put a lot of things into perspective. Made me re-evaluate a lot of things.”

Len had barely heard the last part of what Barry had said, his mind going in circles. “If it had been anybody else?”, he blurted out, hating how breathless he sounded, but unable to stop it.

Barry smirked humourlessly. “Told you we could have been friends.”

Friends? Maybe in a different lifetime. But Len knew that there was something else between them, something else hiding at the edges of their complicated relationship. He leaned forward, suddenly driven by impulse and desire. “Is that what you want Barry? Do you want us to be friends?” Without his permission, one of Len’s hands reached across the table. Barry gasped softly at his touch, but he didn’t pull away. “Is that really what you want?”

Barry shook his head and pulled his hands out of Len’s reach. In a blur, he was standing beside Len. “I don’t want us to be friends”, he panted and the next moment Len had a wide-eyed speedster in his lap.

“Correct me if I am wrong, but I don’t think that is what you want either.”

Len gripped Barry’s hips tightly, keeping him steady and secure in his lap. “You’re not wrong.”

Kissing Barry was nothing like Len had expected. Not that he had thought about it often. But the meta-human kissed gently but deeply, hungrily but never demanding, claiming him but also making him feel cherished.

Len knew that he could easily get lost in Barry Allen. After all, he had done it before, had gotten lost in his obsession with The Flash. But now things were different. Maybe it would not be such a bad thing to get lost in this Barry, in the Barry that climbed into his lap and kissed him until they were panting for breath, the Barry that had followed him into Saints and Sinners without a single complaint, the Barry that had missed him, that was happy to see him alive and well.

Yes, it would not be a bad thing to get lost in Barry Allen.

#ColdFlash #coldflash fix it #leonard snart #barry allen #coldflash fanfic #flash fanfic #The Flash #My writing

[refinedbuffoonery]

Outside Force

Trigger Warning: suicidal thoughts 

Set immediately post-Codex.

*****

His friends are too loud. Bozer’s jokes aren’t funny. Desi and Russ’ laughter grates his ears. The fire is too bright, too hot. 

Riley catches his eye from across the circle. Slight tilt to her head, raised eyebrows. Like she can see through the smile he forced his lips to contort into, the smile that couldn’t meet his eyes, no matter how hard he tried. 

They saved the world from a supervolcano and nuclear winter. 

The team is alive, safe, whole. 

Mac doesn’t feel whole. He saved the world, losing a piece of himself every step of the way. 

The world is so fucking heavy. 

He looks away from Riley. Mac could convince everyone else he is okay, that he is just tired. Who wouldn’t be, after that? Even Bozer mostly believes him. But Riley...she sees right through him. Like she understands. 

Maybe she is just as lost as I am. 

Mac gets up and walks inside without a word. He ends up in his bedroom. He wants to go to sleep until they stop hovering over him and asking him if he is okay. I’m fine. I’m just tired. For a group of highly trained spies, they aren’t very good lie detectors. Either that or they give up too easily. 

Based on how quickly everyone but Riley deemed him a traitor, Mac thinks it’s probably the latter. 

His bed feels like it belongs to another man, one who should’ve died in a fiery explosion. An American flag draped over an empty casket. A quiet funeral. A tombstone marking an empty grave, just like his parents. 

Sleep doesn’t come. Sleep won’t come. Sleep never comes. 

Footsteps echo down the hall. Mac turns his back to the door, deepening his breathing to feign sleep. His last defense against the onslaught of check-ins. Sleep is sacred; the one thing none of them will interrupt. 

The door creaks open. He keeps forgetting to fix it. 

“I know you’re not asleep,” Riley says. 

Mac freezes, just in case she’s bluffing. The door closes. 

“I know you’re not asleep, Mac,” she repeats, coming closer. “You and I both know you don’t sleep anymore.” 

Caught. So much for sleep being sacred. 

The bed dips beside him, and Mac rolls over, cracking his eyes open. The inquisitive look Riley wore outside is gone, replaced by soft determination. Riley glances down at his hand, fisted in the comforter, and covers it with her own. He unclenches it. 

“Sorry I left like that,” Mac started. “I’m just--” 

“Tired,” Riley finished. “I know.” 

He doesn’t deserve to be here right now, with her looking at him like that. Like she cares. He is living on borrowed time--he’s been living on borrowed time, ever since he dropped out of MIT and joined the Army. Now it feels like he’s reached his expiration date, and every death on his behalf buys him bonus time he doesn’t want. He sure as hell doesn’t deserve it. 

Not everyone gets a soft ending. Not him. After everything, not him. 

Riley crosses her legs beneath her, like she’s planning on staying awhile. “Tell me about it.” 

This is new. Gone are her offers to be there when he’s ready to talk. Now she’s making him talk, even though it’s the last thing he wants to do. Mac doesn’t have the energy to be mad at her for it. 

How could he tell her that he feels like he hit rock bottom, yet he’s still falling? Down, down, down, and there’s no end in sight. Maybe there isn’t an end. Maybe Hell doesn’t have a bottom; it’s just falling through layer after layer after layer for the rest of eternity. 

Maybe he should’ve let the volcano erupt. Maybe it would’ve blown his soul into so many pieces there wouldn’t be any of him left for a hellish afterlife. That’s what it would’ve done to his body, after all. His body and the rest of the Western Hemisphere. 

“They’re all dead,” he finally whispers. The loss of his family is the easier horror. The expected one. It’s easier to lament the dead than explain why he belongs with them. 

Riley waits for him to explain. He does, even though she knows most of it already. He tells her about the last moment with his aunt, after she chose to set off the explosion so he could live. He tells her about his dad, a dead man sacrificing himself to buy his son time. He tells her about his grandpa, who raised him. He tells her about his mom being taken away too soon, put down for trying to build a healthier world for her son to inherit. Not the guilt. Not the part where he wishes he was dead instead of them. 

Riley seems to be at a loss for words. She is silent for several minutes before asking, “So what are you going to do with the time they gave you?” 

“I don’t deserve that time.” 

There it is. The other thing. 

Her soft determination erupts into something else. Something...angry. She leans over him, planting her hands on either side of his shoulders. “Now listen to me, Angus MacGyver. You deserve every single second you get on this fucked up planet, and don’t you ever try to convince yourself otherwise. You hear me? I’m not Jack, but I swear to god I will keep you alive by sheer force of will if that’s what it takes until you believe you deserve it.” 

The edges of his vision blur as tears start to form. This was a mistake. He shouldn’t have burdened her with this. 

She’d be trying a long time. There is nothing he could do to deserve living at the expense of another person’s life. They deserved to live out their own lives. 

He is living the life of another man’s son, a son who was sacrificed by Mac’s own father to keep him alive. 

The lives of his mentor and his friend, who died in explosions meant for him. 

The lives of the Codex operatives sentenced to die by their own leader, merely the price for the chance to eliminate Angus MacGyver. 

“Mac,” Riley says, heartbreakingly softly. “Why didn’t you say anything?” 

He takes a deep breath. He couldn’t avoid it anymore, at least not with her. Hiding the truth would hurt her just as much as telling it. 

“I didn’t want to be another problem.” 

“Another problem? You think I’d rather watch you internalize your guilt so much that you blindly volunteer yourself for every self-sacrificial thing possible? Watch you put yourself in harm's way because you think everyone else’s safety is more important than yours?” Her voice broke. “Getting shot at by a dozen highly-trained snipers is a problem. But you dying? That will break me.” 

Tears flow freely down both their faces. Mac curves a hand around her neck, thumb brushing her cheek. Riley rests her forehead against his. “I’m sorry,” Mac croaks. 

Riley cradles his face in her hands. “There’s nothing for you to be sorry for.” 

“Feels like there is,” he admits as another round of hot tears splashes onto his cheeks. He hates himself for making her cry like this. He hates himself for giving her this burden, this weight to carry. He hates himself for hoping sharing would make it easier to bear. 

Sharing definitely makes it worse. 

Mac caves in on himself, plummeting deeper and deeper into the guilt. 

“Hey, hey hey.” Riley squeezes his cheeks. “Come back to me.” 

The numbness sets in again. One limb at a time, he loses feeling in his body. Another piece of him falls away. It’s cold. Mac thinks he’s cold, but Riley’s tears burn like boiling water dripping on his face. Just let go already, a little voice calls. There’s no reason for you to still be here. 

“Mac,” Riley pleads. “I need you to breathe, okay? You’re safe. I’ve got you.” 

She inhales deeply, loudly. Mac tries to match it but can’t seem to suck in enough air. His lungs are collapsing from the pressure of falling deeper and deeper into the Earth. Soon he won’t be able to breathe at all. His lungs won’t inflate and he’ll finally get his wish. 

His fingers find her pulse, pressing below her jaw. It’s fast enough he can match his shallow breaths to it. In out. In out. In out. Her pulse slows as he starts to breathe again. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. 

“I’m back,” he chokes out. 

His hands settle on her waist as he mentally prepares himself to push her away. Riley doesn’t need this, Mac thinks. She has her own trauma to work through. 

He could do it--drive her away with a single sentence. Call her out for asking him to share his problems when she is still determined to ignore her own. He could call her a coward and a hypocrite, and she’d pack up her belongings and move out of his house so quickly it’d be like she was never there in the first place. 

“Mac,” she whispers. 

He can’t do it. Call him selfish, but he can’t bring himself to cut her free. 

He needs her. 

Like she could read his mind, Riley murmurs, “Let me help you.” Her body shakes. 

“You can’t bring them back, Riles.” Mac guides her down to lay on top of him. Her small body feels gigantic above him, heavy with the weight he’d just saddled her with. 

“Let me help you anyway.” 

“Okay,” he relents. Mac rolls them onto their sides and squeezes her tightly until she stops shaking. 

She can’t fix him, not really. She can’t save him from an eternity of falling, but maybe, just maybe, she could help him control his descent. 

An object in motion will stay in motion unless acted upon by an outside force. Newton’s first law. 

Riley is an outside force, alright. I swear to god I will keep you alive by sheer force of will if that’s what it takes, she said earlier. I’ve got you. 

“Riles?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Thank you. For everything.” I love you. 

Mac sees it, in her eyes. The “I love you too” glimmering back at him. All she says is, “You would do the same for me.” 

He tucks her head under his chin and tangles his legs with hers, considering the words they didn’t say. After a few minutes, he asks, “Can you stay? I don’t want to be alone.” For the first time that night, he doesn’t. He wants company. Her company. 

His best friend, the outside force who keeps him from endlessly falling into the abyss. 

“Sure.” 

Mac doesn’t want to let her go, but eventually he does, so she can send their friends home and change into pajamas. Riley returns pajama-clad and makeup-free, worry lines still creasing her face. 

She slides under the covers and pulls Mac to her so he can rest his head on her chest, her nails lightly scratching his scalp as she toys with his hair. “Can you promise me something?” she asks. Mac looks up at her. “Tell me next time, before it gets bad like that again.” 

“I will,” he swears, and he means it. 

They don’t say anything else for the rest of the night. Mac doesn’t know how long he dozes in Riley’s arms while she stays awake, keeping watch. At one point, he brushes a hand down her face to gently close her eyes, earning a soft chuckle. When Riley’s breathing finally deepens, Mac slips into unconsciousness once more. 

He wakes in Riley’s arms the next morning, and for the first time in a long time, he feels light. 

#beth writes #macgyver #tw suicidal thoughts #macgyver fanfiction

[venteamocha]

Thanks so much for the IF recs! I'd absolutely take a second post of recommendations for Twine games too if you're willing to share! <3

Of course!!

I... actually like twine games better than cog based ones, in some ways, just because they tend to be fancier and prettier, and I am secretly a ferret in the body of a human and I love shinies. ADHD, baby!

I only actually know of like 12 twine games, so if there are any that anyone who sees this knows of that I didn’t list, feel free to let me know about them! There’s a chance I do know about them and just didn’t put them here, but I would rather hear one I already know of on the off chance that I’ll get a new one dropped in.

That said! Another list of games I really like that is again in no particular order!

They’re all on itch.io by the way! They tend to work better if you download them but most can be run in your browser and most are also mobile friendly so you can play them on your phone! I’ll note which ones are.

Scout: An Apocalypse Story: I love dystopia stories, I dearly wish we had more IF based in this kind of setting. Set in a wasteland that is trying to pull itself together with people trying to find out if other settlements are out there while also trying to, well, stay alive. I gotta say, I played only E’s route for a long, long time, but once I tried the other ones I haven’t really gone back. I still love E, you can pry the childhood friend trope out of my cold dead hands, but wow. Oliver. Wow. That dude has serious UST. And Sabine!! I’ve been forced out of my little “play it the same way every time” rut and I’m not sorry. I very much like that you can choose the intimacy level, as someone who’s ace. Sometimes I like reading the smut, sometimes I don’t. Options! (mobile friendly!)

Bad Ritual: I got it baaaaaaaaaad~ I do though, I love Siruud. I have terrible, terrible taste in men. I mentioned Dracula in the other list, and here there’s an actual demon. This is a game with *sass* and I always love a chance to be sassy. I think part of the reason I resonate so much with this one is because of how jaded retail has made me tbh but that’s another story.  Honestly, if you like dark settings, I recommend you play this one first of all my recommendations. It’s just such a good game and there are so many choices and even the pronoun choices are pretty varied.  It’s just good! (mobile friendly!)

Wayfarer: Another for the fantasy list! I love the worldbuilding in this one, and the character creator is just amazing. There are maps, there’s a codex, seriously if you love reading lore, this is definitely a game for you. This is like if Tolkien made an IF. It’s amazing. I’ve said that a few times but it’s true. In all honesty it might count as one that’s not so romance focused, since it does focus more on plot. If I could just sit down and make an IF, I’d want it to be like this tbh. With a beautiful framework, a well organized space of information for the players to just look at and see stuff about the world, a way to develop and build their own character in a clear cut way, and the game immediately tells you what stats are effected by what choices. I really enjoy it when games try to work in character creation in creative ways, but sometimes I just want to sit down and go, “Okay, my character has red hair, blue eyes, is short, and has a crippling phobia of lizards” and this game lets me do that. Well, except for the lizard part. (Not as mobile friendly as the others but I make it work!)

Love and Friendship: It’s a regency game and I love Pride and Prejudice. What can I say? Something about the massive amount of rules of society just gets me. Propriety! This is a game that has a set gender protagonist, female, and it actually is a bit different from the norm in that it has two female love interests and one male, when most of the time it’s the other way around. So that’s something. You can even have a platonic route with a fourth love interest, who is also male. There really aren’t enough platonic routes, but I understand why that is, since a lot of IF players are looking for romance. (mobile friendly!)

Exiled From Court: Also a bit of the same vibe simply because of how constrained everyone is by rules. Nobility, after all. There are a lot of love interests, and one is the MC’s sister’s husband, which is definitely gonna be scandalous. Will I do it? Will I? Eventually. I do like how you can act like an absolute hellion, well, as far as that goes considering. You can try to be a better person but that’s less fun, lol. (mobile friendly!)

A Tale of Crowns: This is literally one of the very first twine games I ever played. Really! It’s got a lot of wonderful intrigue and the setting is very fun. There aren’t a ton of fantasy middle eastern games, and this game is definitely one reason why we should have more. There’s a great deal of customization, and the love interests’ gender will changed based on your MC’s gender and sexuality combination. I like R & D best, and no that’s not a pun. I think. (mobile friendly!)

For the Crown: This is a different game, I swear, they just both happen to have crown in the title, lol. You get to play as an assassin, which is a great deal of fun. The lore in the game is very nice too. I tend to play with they/them pronouns though, and there were a few pronoun hiccups in the game. Seems to be an issue across all of the games made by this author, but I know how much of a pain variables can be so hopefully those will get squashed soon. There’s an explicit content choice in this one as well, and if you turn it on there is an “equipment” choice, so this is definitely gonna be spicy later on! (mobile friendly, but after each chapter the browser shifts as it auto saves. you just have to tap restore game to keep playing.)

-These games aren’t exactly twine games, but I’m putting them here because they’re visual novels that fit the IF format for the most part and are also on itch.io and I love them and for this post at least I will bend my own rules! They all have gender choice MCs and are nonbinary friendly.-

Perfumare: This game is actually being made into an IF, with the visual novel as a sort of preview of what we’re gonna get there. I literally cannot wait for that to happen, this game is so good as it is, and from what we’ve been told it’s only gonna get better. This game has an excellent world, the characters are all messy in the best ways, and ugh it has hurt me quite a bit, again in the best way.  It’s another one on the dark side of things. The powers in this game are just so fun, I dearly want a game set in this world where we can choose what powers we have! Maybe that will be in the IF, but I have a feeling the answer is no. We’ve been teased that there will be a second game with a different MC who will get to romance the characters we can’t in this one, and that alone is enough to get me to jump as soon as it drops. The love interests aren’t gender variable but there are two male ones and one female. I, a known mess, recommend Laurent for lots of repression and pain. (not mobile friendly, you gotta play on desktop/laptop)

Andromeda Six: I’ve recommended this one to pretty much everyone I know, it is such an excellent game. The cast is a mashup of misfits and makes me miss my Mass Effect crews. I specifically set my pronouns to she/her just so they’d all call me Princess. What can I say, I like it. There’s lots of pain, lots of drama, lots of world building, lots of interesting lore, and there is much breaking of cuties. Much. Can’t wait till we get to the next planet. The author has gone out of their way to say that each love interest is gonna get their own arc and will definitely get their own share of attention, so no matter who you pick you’ll have plenty of time to be with them and watch them shine. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

When the Night Comes: Not only do you get to play a badass hunter but it has multiple poly routes! Multiple! It’s rare when you get one poly in a game, this one has three! You can also choose to romance any of them individually if you so choose. It’s dark fantasy gothic, and I really really like that. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

Errant Kingdom: Made from the same dev as WTNC, this one is set in a more fantasy middle eastern setting. Very pretty, lots of intrigue. You can choose between three set protagonists, who can have three different storylines depending on your choices, which is very nice for replayability. It’s got two poly routes this time, and it works the same as their other game in that you can romance them individually if you’d rather be monogamous. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

#if #if recs #rivi's recs #twine games #Anonymous #interactive fiction

[chaseatinydream]

pirate king (68) || atz

Being back with your master makes dying a lot better.

Make no mistake, it’s still awful, but it’s a lot more bearable now, at least. Now, you can wake up in the middle of the night with blood trickling from your nose, and have a warm hand wipe it away with aching tenderness instead of curling up on yourself alone in the darkness, trying to stop the flow with trembling fingers. San’s eyes brim with sorrow in the light of the half moon, but he smiles the best he can, offers you a cloth, and holds you making small talk until it stops.

Still, it helps that he’s there.

You’ve forgotten what it’s like to rely on someone.

You’re sitting inside the infirmary one day, ship rocking gently upon the waves as you attempt to slide the end of a length of thread through the needle’s eye, but the ship rocks upon a sudden wave and you pout as you miss for the umpteenth time. But before you can try again, your master reaches over from where he’s reading a massive codex about deadly illnesses to pluck the needle and thread from you. With a deft flash of the hand and years of practice in his sharp eyes, he slides it through easily and passes it back to you, going back to his book.

You smile gratefully, return to your task. The two of you sit quietly, enjoying the warmth of each other’s company with the silence only punctuated by the occasional flipping of pages of San’s book. You’re about to end off the sewing by tying the thread into a knot when there’s a sudden knock on the door.

Jumping, you turn to stare at the door with wide eyes just as it opens to reveal your captain standing at the other side. You dive to throw your half-completed needlework under the covers before your captain steps into the room, and the second he does, he gives you a warm grin.

“Ah, Chin Hae! Just the person I wanted to see.” Hongjoong says, rubbing his hands together and you give your master a questioning look, which he only returns with a shrug of the shoulders. “Are you free?”

“Y-yeah.” You fumble a little awkwardly, trying hard not to let your eyes stray to the tip of red fur peeking out from beneath the sheets. Would it be more suspicious to move it or leave it be, you lament to yourself, but thankfully, your captain doesn’t seem to notice anything amiss.

“I want to bring you around town today.” He declares and you choke, almost immediately. San hurries over to you to smack your back a few times, but you wave him off, muttering reassurances to him under your breath, and Hongjoong merely looks confused. “Do you not want to go out?” He adds, but you shake your head.

“No... I do, it’s just that...” Your voice trails off, there’s no reason to disagree. Although you’re a little worried about going out with your captain with how your... condition is, you can find no excuse, so you manage a smile and a nod. “Yeah, I’ll come with you. But why me specifically, captain?”

“Call me Hongjoong.” He replies instantly, but answers. “I wanted to bring Yeosang and Yunho out and about a little for some unwinding since the three of you have been through so much the past few days, but Yeosang is still poring over the maps he bought at that last village and Yunho-”

“Ate too much grilled squid and now has a tummy ache.” You finish for him, mildly concerned for your fellow crew mate but also equally amused. San lets out a little snort of laughter from where he’s sitting beside you, arms crossed over his chest. “I told him so.” He says snidely, and you giggle.

“Anyways, would you like to go?” Hongjoong asks. His smile is still warm, tinged with a little hopefulness, and you find yourself nodding alone already. Next to you, San rises to his feet, stretching his arms above his head. “I’m coming too.”

“Oh?” You ask. “Why?”

“I’ve got something I need to pick up from the apothecary.” He tells you, eyes unreadable as he glances at your captain. You cock your head to the side in confusion. “I’m sure it won’t be any trouble if I tag along, captain?”

“None at all.” Hongjoong reassures. He glances between the two of you before he gives a small smile. “I’ll let the two of you gather the things you need before I meet you at the gangplank, alright?”

You nod, and then Hongjoong is stepping out of the room, leaving the two of you in silence. When the door finally clicks, you turn around to give your master a befuddled look. “Why are you suddenly coming with us? Didn’t you just do a stock inventory yesterday and say that you had bought too many herbs on impulse and now they won’t fit into the jars?”

San sighs, steps up to place both hands on your shoulder. “I’m going because of you, apprentice. Your nosebleeds have been gotten more frequent, and I’ve been timing the intervals they occur with the passage of the sun. Didn’t you want to hide this from captain?” His eyes bore into yours and you nod slowly. “Well, in a few more hours should be the time you get another, and while I do not know how accurate this is, we should be wary. I’ll help cover for you if anything happens.”

Your heart warms, and a corner of your mouth tilts up in gratitude. “Thank you, master.” You squeeze one of his hands, before reaching over to pick up his satchel and toss it to him. “Come on. Let’s go.”

The two of you head outside, your master closing the door securely behind him. At the gangplank, your captain awaits, hands behind his back. He seems to have removed his red jacket, presumably to blend in better with the locals. “Shall we go?”

The first step onto dry land has you reeling.

At the contact of your boot with the pier, there’s a sudden nauseating feeling in your gut that has you gripping the hand of your master’s hand tight for a second. You nearly stumble, eyes pinching shut as waves of dizziness roll over you, threatening to capsize you. Images flash through your mind, a man with unearthly bright green eyes, sinking into the waves and endless darkness...

“Chin Hae, Chin Hae, are you alright?” Hongjoong taps on your arm lightly and you shake your head, trying to get rid of the ringing in your head. Thankfully, it dies into a dull ache and you simply wave your captain off, taking another step. “Oh, nothing, just a little vertigo.” You answer, gripping your master’s hand tight. With a tight smile, you point at the little shop houses leading into the streets. “Come on, let’s go!”

Your captain doesn’t seem wholly convinced that you’re fine, but you set off at a quick pace so that he can’t see your expression. Next to you, San gives your arm a soft tug, eyes brimming with worry. “Are you alright?”

His voice is a hushed whisper, but you hear it all the same. You try for a reassuring smile. “I’m fine.” You say, waving him off. There’s a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach that you don’t quite like, but perhaps you too, have eaten one too many grilled squids the night before. Your feet almost reach the end of the harbor when you turn around to glance at your captain to make sure he’s following you. To your surprise, he’s simply standing there, back turned to you, facing the docks from which you had come.

“Hongjoong-hyung?” San calls out to him, a little confused, but your captain doesn’t even seem to hear the healer. Instead, he merely moves out further back from where you had come. Your master shares a confused glance with you, before the two of you step towards him, San laying a hand on his shoulder.

“Captain, what’s going on?” You ask, confused, but your captain merely points down the harbor, jaw clenched. “I can’t see properly,” he says harshly, one hand dragging over his covered eye. “Chin Hae, San, tell me what’s that ship there.”

San frowns, squints down the port. “A... white ship?” There’s a moment of silence, and you tilt your head to stare at the direction your master is looking at. A white ship? Indeed, there is a white ship docking next to the Treasure, but what’s the significance?

“A white ship...” Your master lets the words roll on his tongue. “A white ship...” It takes a second, another, before his mouth falls open in horror, entire face draining of blood. “A white ship.”

You’re still confused, but then Hongjoong immediately grabs you and San by the arms, running full speed back towards the Treasure and you yelp in surprise, barely managing to stumble after them.

“What’s going on?” You shout at San, eyebrows furrowed, and he only gives you one answer, grim as the storm clouds approaching from the sea.

The tides bring both the good and the bad.

“Wooyoung.”

#ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #yeosang #san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #ateez pirate king #w; ot8 #w; pirate king #w; fanfiction

[kisstheassassins]

A Kiss Away

Just an OC x Canon fic between my character Rosalina and Ezio. Self indulgent -3-

By now Rosalina has become accustomed to Ezio’s charms, including his sly advances and flirting. She tries to play it off and most of the time it works, making the man flustered in return, mostly because he was unsuccessful. However there are moments where he is successful in his attempts, especially as of late. 

And this time it’s in the workshop belonging to a close friend of theirs. 

Rosalina Aluino (OC) x Ezio Auditore

~~~~~

It was a rather quiet evening in the city, a bit different than the norm. Most of the time the streets were bustling with people going to and fro, on with their lives whether it be a job, running an errand or simply out to enjoy the day; for an assassin and such little crowds to blend into it was hard to keep away from peeping eyes now.

At Leonardo’s workshop however nothing seemed different than it was outside the walls. Leo is rushing back and forth to one spot and to another, seeming to find different things to work on every few minutes.

There is a knock on the door and he freezes his hand from making a stroke of paint at his canvas. He sets the brush aside and wipes his hands on an old cloth that is stained with new and old paint. There are even a few spots on his cheek he seems to miss.

He peeps through the door hole and smiles as he then opens it, arms wide for a hug; Leo’s friend graciously returns one.

“Rosalina!” he chuckles happily, “what brings you here?”

The woman smiles contently and pulls out what appears to be a rolled up piece of paper, detailed with golden and black outlines. Leo’s face lights up at the sight of it and gently takes the Codex page to open it slowly. 

“You and Ezio never cease to amaze me,” Leo states with a smile. Rosa follows him to his work desk.

“Is it worthwhile?” The Assassin inquires. “It better be, for what I went through to get it.”  Sewers weren’t her favorite thing to be searching through on a daily basis.

Shrugging his shoulders, he peeks over at her quickly. “I suppose we shall find out,” Leo replies. He sets the paper flat on the wooden tabletop, and it only seemed like seconds and the man has already come up with solutions. It still amazes Rosa at how smart he is; she’s almost jealous.

Leo turns to Rosa with the Codex in hand.

“If you wouldn’t mind,” he begins, “I will decode this for you. It may take some time however. This page is a lot more complex than the others you have given me.”

The woman shrugs her shoulders, gesturing to his work place.

“Be my guest,” Rosa smiles, “I can wait.”

“Perfetto! (Perfect)”

Amber eyes watch Leonardo as he trails off into another room, and not wanting to disturb him Rosalina stays behind. The bookshelves catch her attention nearly instantly after her friend is gone. The shelves were at least either feet high, she deducts, and every slot is filled with a book.

“What sort of reading are you into Leonardo?”, she questions softly to herself. Rosa takes a book and begins reading. Much of it is foreign to her, words in Italian that she has not yet learned. Another book she takes is in Latin; that immediately gets returned. 

Thirty minutes into her time at Leo’s workshop have gone by. Rosa eventually settles herself into a chair with a book about the Greek Gods. Mythology wasn’t her strongest suit but she didn’t want to fumble with anymore of Leo’s books, fearing he may of had a system for the way he organized said books. 

There’s a knock on the door, and the woman’s attention is shifted immediately. She places the book down and walks to the entrance with a hand on the hilt of her blade.

What’s a cause for such defensiveness? Past encounters on Leonardo’s life, none of them good, resulted in her defensive stance. 

She sighs though once she sees who it is when looking through the peep hole, and her hand drops down to her thigh while the other pulls open the door.

“Ezio,” she greets, her bodyweight shifting against the door frame. The taller man chuckles and bows his head to her.

“Princessa, (princess)” he returns. Rosa shakes her head and rolls her eyes, clearing the way for him to enter. 

She closes the door behind him.

“You know I hate that name,” she grumbles, following him soon. Her eyes catch his as he turns to look back at her. Ezio is smiling warmly at her, and now she realizes her face feels flushed at the eye contact.

"I have many others,” Ezio chuckles deeply. His head tilts slightly at her. “I will just use those as replacement.”

“Or just my name. That’s sufficient,” she comments, walking past him and turning to lean against the wooden table. Rosa’s eyes glimmer a small amount when she sees the taller man takes a few slow steps towards her. Her arms fold across her chest to appear more broad. He was intimidating, and right now in a good way. “What are you even doing here? I thought you were in Monterrigioni?”

“I have some things here to take care of,” Ezio begins, slowly getting closer. “I’m starting to realize you know where I’m going even before I do.”

His hand reaches for the back of her jawline and slowly traces it to the front with a feather like touch, taking in the fact that he notices she hasn’t retreated away from him. Maybe even shifted her weight just a slight amount to rest into his palm.

A deep chuckles erupts from his chest.

“You are not following me are you?”

Another roll of the woman’s amber eyes and she gently removes his hand away, not flinching when it settles just beside her on the desk.

“Not every woman wants to chase after you Ezio,” she replies, shyly looking up at him. His laugh is intoxicating, practically feeling his chest hum as he reels in closer. Rosa has to look away from him and down to the floor. However he wasn’t having it, wanting her to look at him. It was rare times he was able to get this close to her and not have her back away. 

A finger rests on her chin, another under it as he lifts Rosa’s face to look at him. She has no choice but to.

“Only a jealous woman would say such a thing.”

Rosa chuckles sarcastically and rolls her eyes, still held captive by Ezio’s hand under her chin. 

“Your charms do not work on me Ezio,” she says, pushing his hand away once again, and like the other it rests on the other side of the table. The man manages to wedge himself between her legs.  He tilts his head again, smiling down at her. The woman can feel his breath on her lips and nose. 

“Yet you have not told me to stop,” he whispers, beginning to gently sway with her. “Perhaps they are working more than you think.”

“You have me wedged between a table Ezio,” she replies softly as well. “I cannot really go anywhere.”

Another chuckle from him, and this time it makes Rosa reach for the sides of his belt, grasping at the leather gently to rest her hands.

“That wouldn’t stop a woman like yourself,” he smiles, inching his face closer. Ezio watches her lips slightly part and her eyes drift down to his own. Now his other hand comes to cup the other side of her face and she then fully leans into his touch; it sends shivers down his own spine at how content Rosa looked. “Do you want me to stop?”

Immediately her eyes shoot up at him, dazed and shimmering from the lanterns around them. They almost seemed. . . to plead.

Her mouth opens to speak as Ezio’s gets closer, enough to possibly connect, when the curtains separating this room to the one beyond it part ways and flutter like wings of a bird. Ezio’s hands slide off of her, as well as Rosa’s off Ezio, and the woman looks down at the floor sheepishly while Ezio swallows thickly. 

“Oh,” they hear Leo gasp, “I- I did not mean-” He then spins around quickly and fixes his hat. “I shall come back in a few moments!”

Ezio clears his throat and speaks up for Rosa, as she can’t look anywhere else but the floorboards at the moment.

“Va bene (it’s alright), Leonardo,” Ezio sputters. “I just came to check up on you. It seems Rosalina has beaten me to it.”

Leo’s hands fidget with the tail of his belt, turning slowly and awkwardly to look at them. Rosa finally has the courage to peer back at him. She stands now beside Ezio, however with her arms still crossed.

“I was uh, successful in decoding the page you brought me Rosalina,” the artisan speaks. He walks slowly to the desk she was once sitting on and lays the paper flat. He smooths out the page and exhales sharply while the other two peer beside him.

“It is simply an upgrade for your blades,” he says, “it is more lethal in design which provides more speed when using it. It will be so light you might as well be slicing the air open.”

“Funciona para mi (works for me), Leonardo,” Rosa smiles, giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder. He smiles in return. “Anything you design is always worthy.”

With a confident smile and attitude Leo collects both of their silver and takes it to the back of his home again. Within only ten minutes he has returned with both blades and they are looking as sleek as ever. Rosa takes hers in admiration and holds it up to the lantern, watching her reflection on the blade. She then turns back and takes a few steps away to swing her blade effortlessly to test it; Leonardo never ceased to amaze her. 

Holstering it where it belonged on her belt, the woman turns to the men with a smile on her face.

“Muchas gracias (thank you so much), Leonardo. You’re doing God’s work with these Codex pages.”

The flattered and flustered man waves her off as he turns to his desk to sit down. He watches Ezio still admiring his blade and then putting it away. He nods to him and smiles.

“She speaks the truth amico, (friend)” Ezio says.

Another chuckle as Leo sits back in the chair, smiling up at them.

“Enough you two,” Leo prattles, “now go on, you have more important things to do.”

Ezio then turns to Rosa and gives her that cheeky smile he had moments ago where they were. . . closer than they are now.

“Indeed we do.”

She catches on immediately, and her face begins to burn once again. Rosa makes haste for the door as she waves goodbye to Leonardo over her shoulder.

“Adiós amigo!” Rosa calls back. However when she calls Ezio’s expression drops and he looks to Leo; he was hoping Rosa would have waited for him. Leo laughs joyfully at the exchange.

“You better catch up to her,” he says, “she was raised by La Volpe, no? She may be long gone by now if you don’t hurry.”

The assassin huffs and hurries for the door, giving his friend a wave goodbye before leaving. He sees her just outside waiting by a merchant stand, leaning against the brick wall dividing the city from the countryside.

“I figured you would have left me,” he comments, huffing as he gets to her.

“Why?” she questions, “after what happened in there?” The woman huffs as she begins walking with him.  Ezio is baffled a moment, unable to speak before he can finally say anything.

“Well. . . si, actually. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“Who says I was?”

Once again is trying to register what she had said. 

It hits him eventually, and he is wearing an even dumber smile that makes Rosa wish she had kept her damn mouth shut, and she begins to walk faster to try and lose him.

Ezio takes her hand and she stops to look down at it, surprised at his actions. This place was not the time nor location to do this. To even have this conversation.

“Is that right?” he chuckles, making her huff and walk off. He grabs her hand again and she snaps it away.

“We shall not speak of this any longer,” she points an angry finger at him, legs forcing her to walk again. Ezio is close behind.

“Did you enjoy it?!”

“Ezio, por favor. . .”

The man laughs. “You did!”

“I am going to hurt you in a second, cállate! (shut up!)”

#my writing #oc #my oc #oc x canon #canon x oc #rosalina x ezio auditore #rosalina aluino x ezio auditore #oc x ezio auditore #ac #assassins creed #assassins creed oc #assassins creed 2 oc #rosalina #rosalina aluino

[akindofmagictoo]

20 first lines tag game

this comes from @zmlorenz and also I think @amillionwips — thank you both!

rules: list the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20 stories just list them all). see if there are any patterns. choose your favourite opening line. then tag others. 

(I will tag @writingbyjillian @pamsdrabbles @sleepyowlwrites and anyone who wants to play!) 

Hurricane 

Tempest stilled her bouncing leg, eyeing her sleeping husband. Had she woken him? She took a careful breath and didn’t let it go until he snored and rolled over, pulling the covers tighter around himself. Still she waited. One breath. Two breaths. When he still didn’t move, she stood up and grabbed her coat and sword belt, not even bothering to put them on. Because she had to leave, and she had to leave today. 

Theo x Aella Little Mermaid AU

Water closed over his head, tugged at his clothes. Tugged him down… down… 

He wanted to cry out for help, but the water filled up his mouth before he could make a sound. Cold stole into his limbs, heavy and dark, weighing him down. 

His chest ached, searching for air. Deep, cold darkness wrapped around him. Dragging, pressing, pulling down.

Down… down… down… 

When he’d hit the water, he’d panicked. That was gone now. All he felt was the cold, the deep dark cold.

a random post-canon Theo x Aella oneshot 

Thunder rumbled overhead, blending into the drumming of the rain on the roof. Aella tucked her blanket more tightly around herself, but it did no good. She couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t keep her mind off the locked front door, Alanna’s instruction to stay inside. It felt too much like other locked doors. Every time she closed her eyes, she was back there again and—

No. Sitting in this bed alone with her thoughts would do no good.

a post-canon Theo x Aella oneshot (sort of the former version of the one above)

“Read the mermaid one again.” Aella snuggled against Theo, pressed up between him and the arm of the big old armchair. 

a Theo x Aella modern AU 

Even with a map on his phone, Theo was impressed he’d made it to the small cafe on the main street. True, it was the main street, but his new house wasn’t, and directions weren’t his forte. Given how recently he’d moved, it was at least understandable. 

The cafe was small, but its list of drink options was larger than he’d expected. But it included several types of tea, so he ordered a familiar English Breakfast and sat down at the nearest table.

post-canon oneshot of the Hurricane women play ‘theatre’ 

“So, who’s up next?” Aria stretched out in her hammock. “As much as I enjoyed being the defence lawyer, I think it’s someone else’s turn.” 

“I’ll play the accused. I want to try my daring escape again,” Aella volunteered, sitting up. 

Theo grinned. “Because you got caught last time?” 

a crossover royalty AU with another project (Labyrinth) 

(this isn’t the first line, but it’s the first lines where Theo appears. also, you would be correct if you assume that the Spanish princess is not Aella. that is the complication.) 

“Spain confirmed the marriage alliance,” said Jared. “We still have to confirm it one last time, though.” 

Theo glanced up at his dad. “Hardly surprising, really. They offered it, after all.” 

Jared nodded. “Are you still alright with this? We can turn them down now, if you want.” 

“My calendar is free,” said Theo, straight-faced. “I mean, it’s not like I’ve got my eye on someone else or whatever. Just as long as I’m not expected to actually have a romantic relationship with the Spanish princess.” 

the below are all fanfictions. [ps my AO3 is @/ sidebysidewithafriend go check it out if any of these fics interest you] 

Shadow and Cottontail (Harry Potter: Marauders (OC insert)) 

(this is co-written, I’m posting the first part that I wrote) 

“Is there mail today?” Kai Lupin jumped the last step down to the dining room. This was the same question she’d been asking for five days, but she asked anyway. 

Her mother Hope was about to answer when an owl swooped through the open window, a parchment envelope clutched in its beak. 

“I think the answer is yes,” said Remus, descending the stairs behind her with a little more care than she’d taken. Kai rolled her eyes and crossed the room to see what the envelope contained.

Hope was already taking it from the owl. “It’s from Hogwarts,” Hope said, and Kai’s heart leapt, only to be dashed by her mother’s next words. “But there’s only one envelope. It’s addressed to you, Kai.” 

Told You You’d Kill It (Harry Potter: Romione) 

“Ugh.” Ron shoved his books to one side and ran a hand through his hair, making it stick up in all different directions. Hermione hid a smile as Ron drew his hands inside his jumper sleeves.

Through a yawn, he continued, “I’m done. I’m so tired.” Probably from his basketball training, but schoolwork was also a struggle for him, she knew. And they’d been studying in the library for several hours now. No wonder he was exhausted.

Thank You For Saving My Cat (Harry Potter: Jily) 

Lily pushed herself up to a sitting position and breathed a small sigh of relief. At least she was out. She turned back to the house, watching the orange flames that danced over the structure with her heart in her throat. Was it her imagination, or were they growing smaller?

Most of her stuff could be replaced. But she hoped nonetheless that she wouldn’t have to.

Then she remembered the one thing she’d left behind and couldn’t replace. Crookshanks. She stumbled to her feet. Legs shaking under her, she ran to the nearest firefighter and grabbed their sleeve. The firefighter gear covered its occupant’s face, but the voice sounded male. “Are you alright?” He took her arm gently, steadying her.

3AM (Harry Potter: Wolfstar) 

The beeping of the fire alarm filtered into Sirius’s sleeping brain, burrowing in until he couldn’t help but wake up. At which point he groaned and wrapped his pillow around his head, trying to block out the noise.

But this was a fire alarm, so really he had to get up. Grudgingly, he removed the pillow from his head and fumbled for his phone to check the time. The light from the screen was blinding in the darkness of his dorm room, but after a moment his eyes adjusted to see that it was 3:07 AM.

Give Him Back to Me (The Great Library: Wolfe x Santi) 

Day 1

“Nic?” Wolfe half-rose from the bed at the sound of knocking, leaving his Codex open beside him. Something was off, though. Nic wouldn’t knock. He had a key. Besides, Nic was away in Belgium, training a new company. He wasn’t due back for another day or two, and that was assuming everything went to plan.

Nevertheless, when the knock came again he got to his feet and headed for the door.

Death Is Not Fair (Shadowhunters: (very angsty) Malec) 

It wasn’t fair. Then again, life wasn’t fair.

And neither was death.

It shouldn’t have happened. It should have been a simple mission. The scans and all the reports had said there was just one demon in the area. It was a larger, stronger demon, and would’ve put up a good fight, but it was still practically nothing to a Shadowhunter like Alec.

Untitled (Shadowhunters: Sizzy) (unfinished and un-posted) 

Izzy was swearing off dating. She’d kind of thought about it before, but hearing about the amount of drama in Jace’s love life right now cemented the idea firmly in her mind. No more dating. Between that and the mess Alec had gone through a couple of months ago, she wasn’t sure she wanted any part of that. Not to mention that of all the boys she’d dated, none of the relationships had really been right. Did she believe in The One? She wasn’t sure. But none of her boyfriends had been it, that was for sure. So no more dating for her. She was here to study forensic chemistry, after all, and surely it was better to concentrate on that.

Moving Day (Riordanverse: Blitzstone) 

Last? signed Hearth. 

Blitz brushed a speck of dust from the shoulder of his shirt, studying Hearth’s face. He knew exactly how many boxes were left to move, and it was more than zero, but the elf was looking paler than usual. If that was possible. As he watched, Hearth swayed a little and put a hand on the wall for support. “No. But I’ll get the rest. You need a break.”

Untitled quarantine AU (Riordanverse: Percabeth) (unfinished and un-posted)

“Thanks for letting me stay over to finish this project,” said Annabeth, setting the last piece on the model Coliseum she’d made. They’d done most of it last night, and she was just adding the finishing touches now. Although that had been before school had been shut down; they’d been notified the night before, but since she was here she’d been determined to finish it.  

Untitled (The Hobbit) (I have a “better version of Tauriel’s arc” thing in the works, and this is an accompanying oneshot of how the Durins died in this version) (un-posted) 

“Where is he? It looks empty. I think Azog has fled.” Fili glanced around nervously, his breath steaming in the icy air. 

“I don’t think so,” said Thorin. 

Footsteps sounded on the ice, echoing in all directions. It was impossible to know their source. 

“We’ve got company,” Thorin growled. 

Kili readied his sword. 

This was practically everyday for them at this point. Every motion of his sword, every footstep, every bit of it was familiar. Fili hardly had to think. His sword flashed in the faint light. Droplets of blood and crystals of ice spattered his exposed skin, hot and cold. He was at home here; he might not have been on the ice before, but with a sword in his hand and Kili and Thorin at his back, he was content.

this is VERY long. if you read to here, thank you! and maybe consider reading some of them in full on my AO3? 

#tag game #20 first lines tag #wip hurricane #wip labyrinth #zoe writes

[self-loving-vampire]

Ultima IV: Quest of the Avatar (1985)

Ultima 4 is a very historically-significant game, as well as being where the Ultima series cemented itself as something truly unique. Where the previous games in the series (as well as the RPG genre in general) often dealt with defeating some kind of evil overlord, Ultima 4 has no antagonist and instead calls on you to perfect yourself and embody a set of eight moral virtues.

Summary

You start the game by answering several moral dilemmas to determine your class and starting location. You are then transported to the fantasy land of Britannia to embark on a spiritual quest to become the Avatar of virtue and read the Codex of Ultimate Wisdom in the Abyss.

To do this, you must master eight virtues and understand the three principles involved in them.

The game has been widely ported but I will be reviewing the free version available from GOG.

Freedom

Ultima 4 is an extremely open game in many ways. There are eight possible classes and each is rather different, with a unique starting location. Most importantly, all of the many tasks the game asks you to complete prior to the final descent into the Abyss can be done in any order you desire.

You can maximize your virtues in any order, explore dungeons in any order, travel the world as you wish, find the runes in any order, and etc.

So all in all, this game is very non-linear when it comes to exploration and objective order.

Note, however, that due to the way this game is designed it is not actually very replayable. Even if the initial experience is different for each class and you can complete the game’s many objectives in any order, those objectives are still the same and they all do need to be completed by the end. There are no alternate ways to complete any objectives.

By the end of the game, you will be playing largely the same way regardless of what your initial class was or what order you did things in.

This is made worse by the fact that ranged weapons completely dominate the game. There is little reason to use melee if you have the option to use ranged weapons.

Character Creation/Customization

Besides your name, gender, and choice of class, you cannot really decide anything about your character. Once in-game, you also don’t have that many options for upgrading your party besides obtaining better equipment and finding magical orbs in dungeons.

That said, the game does get some points for the variety of classes and for how radically some of them can affect your experience, particularly in the early game. 

The most striking example is the Shepherd class, which you get for having humility as your favored virtue during the character creation questions. Shepherds are terrible at everything. They can’t use magic at all (most other classes can to varying degrees) and are awful at combat, having a very limited selection of weapons and armor available. They also start in a ruined island populated by monsters. It is basically the game’s “hard mode.”

You can answer these same questions and find your class here (the link says Ultima VI but it’s really the same ones as far as I can tell, or at least close).

Story/Setting

The game world is reasonably large and memorable, but to be honest the setting of the Ultima games has always been on the more generic side, even if some of the games in the series are pretty immersive. The virtues introduced in this game are really the primary spice on the game world.

It is a medieval fantasy setting with all the staples: Fireballs, orcs, dragons, liches, skeletons, and so on. It does have a few less common creatures as well (like balrons and zorns).

A generic fantasy setting is not necessarily bad, but it is not particularly good either. It is just the baseline as far as I am concerned, and can be boring on its own if you are not drawn in by anything else a game offers.

In this case, the setting is not really the game’s selling point so much as its unique objective. It is also still a massive improvement over some of the earlier games in the series, which feature things like space travel and time travel.

Another point in favor is that the towns scattered throughout the land are not just generic fantasy towns, they are dedicated to specific virtues. Those virtues seem to be particularly alive in the minds of their inhabitants in this game as well. The virtues are so embedded in the setting for the rest of the series that it does give it more of an identity.

The story itself is, as previously mentioned, unique among all RPGs I know of. While there is a lot of combat and dungeons to explore, there is no big antagonist for you to defeat.

Your behavior is tracked from beginning to end. You will need to do things like donating money to the needy, donating blood at the healer, and letting non-evil creatures (generally animals) flee in order to become the avatar. I also do not recommend “grinding” out these virtues unless you really need to, as I found that as long as you know how to raise them you can easily achieve avatarhood in several of them just by playing the game normally, talking to everyone and visiting Hawkwind every time you’re in the castle.

In addition to maximizing your virtues and then meditating at the proper shrines, your quest will see you travel throughout the entire world to collect the artifacts you will need for your descent into the abyss. 

You will need the eight stones of virtue (most of which are within dungeons), the Key of Three Parts, the three artifacts of the principles, the word of power, and more. You will also need to recruit seven party members to aid you in your quest, each representing one of the virtues (you are the representative of the eighth).

Immersion

I know it’s probably not that bad by the standards of its time, but I can’t say the game’s immersion is all that good. It does gain some points in some areas such as the way the manuals work and how you need to actually do things like keep track of the phases of the world’s two moons (clearly not something you’d see in our world!) to make proper use of moongates, but overall it is definitely not on the same level as other RPGs I have played. As was sadly the case for the technically-limited time period the game was made in, the world does not really react very much to your actions even though your virtues are tracked.

I do like the initial character creation questions, however. Trying to answer them honestly based on your own moral principles can be a good way to get started. It is also good that the whole virtue angle requires you to actually roleplay the quest of the avatar in order to win.

Gameplay

Playing the game is extremely simple as long as you reference your keys as needed and read the manuals (perhaps it is even too simple, with only one type of non-spell attack action and relatively few and uninteresting equipment options). Talking to every NPC you meet is also recommended, as they not only have a lot of advice but also several vital clues that you will need if you plan to complete the game without a walkthrough, as the whole thing is rather obscure about certain aspects of your quest.

The magic system is a mixed bag. You have to gather and mix reagents to cast spells. The reagents must be mixed ahead of time and are consumed. You must also know which reagents to mix. The spell manual that comes with the game explains most of the combinations, but there are some that you must discover on your own within the game, and they are for some of the most potent spells too (such as Resurrect).

On one hand, I like how the game invites you to actually learn its magic system in order to make use of it, with many reagents having consistent qualities that can let you guess what kinds of spells they may be used for. On the other, it can be a bit time-consuming to manually mix these reagents every single time you want to prepare a spell.

However, the thing that really kills the second half of the game is the combat.

The combat is initially a bit simple but functional. You can press one of the arrow keys to move in one of four directions, you can press A followed by a direction to attack in that direction, or you can press C to cast one of your prepared spells.

With such simplicity, combat in the early game doesn’t take very long, especially since as far as I can tell there are less/weaker enemies early on (though there’s enough encounters to make it a bit of a pain still). However, as you gather more companions (and you must have a party of 8 before venturing into the final dungeon and completing the game) combat starts to drag on as you have to manually command each of your eight party members.

It’s especially bad in that one party member in particular (Katrina the Shepherd) is, to put it bluntly, a complete burden on the party as you might expect from a shepherd. She will be missing every single attack against the stronger enemies that populate the late game, and not hitting very hard when she does hit due to the awful weapon selection shepherds get. I wish you did not need to recruit everyone.

This would have been a bit of a pain on its own, but not that bad. No, the real problem is one single spell: Sleep.

A handful of late game enemies (such as gazers, but especially reapers, and balrons) will spam this one spell without mercy, even if your entire party is already sleeping.

This is a spell that can incapacitate multiple characters, potentially half your party or more, for several turns. The Awaken spell is pointless as a counter to it, as it affects a single target and the enemy can spam Sleep every round while you will quickly run out of Awaken even if your spellcasters somehow manage to avoid the sleep themselves.

Your characters do not wake up if they take damage, and there seems to be no limit to how often the enemy can use Sleep.

This is still manageable when fighting only one or two of these enemies in reasonably open ground, but in tight spaces where sleeping characters can block the way for the rest of the party or in dungeons where you face half a dozen or more of these enemies in a single room it can make for an experience that is just painful.

It is not even that this makes the game difficult either, the enemies do very little damage even when they are not spending all their turns casting Sleep over and over again, but it does make some dungeon rooms feel like they exist merely to waste your time.

The single worst offender was this room at the bottom of the Abyss.

10 Balrons that you can’t even reach due to a wall of force (central blue square) in the way. They can Sleep half your party despite this, regardless of where anyone is in the room. I timed it and it literally took me about 20 minutes just to walk everyone east at this one turn. There are other rooms that have this same issue as well.

While there’s annoying things like that, the game is actually extremely easy in terms of combat, at least once you get over the initial hump.

Aesthetics

As noted in the setting section, the game is on the more generic side aesthetically. That said, the simple graphics are at least readable for the most part (magical fields and the like aside) and the unique main quest gives the game a very distinct feel.

Accessibility

Surprisingly high due to its simplicity. Combat is about as mindless as you could ask for in an RPG other than making it completely automatic like Ultima 7 did, and there are not actually that many keys to remember.

However, there are still a couple of things that modern players will have to adapt to. Chief among them are consulting the manuals throughout the game and taking notes.

The game has no quest log to record all the clues the game’s many, many NPCs provide you with. You have to actually write those things down together with things like the mantras for meditating at the shrines, the visions you get as you achieve partial avatarhoods, and etc.

Your knowledge of the virtues will be tested at the very end.

Conclusion

I would not blame anyone for jumping ship once the late game begins, as things become slow and repetitive at that point. However, I believe that this game is worth trying regardless (especially now that it is given out for free).

This is an RPG unlike any other I have seen, demanding its players to not only live up to heroic (and largely secular) moral principles but also encouraging them bring them out of the game and applying them to their lives and become better people.

While its combat can become a bit of a pain later on, the game’s ideas remain interesting at the very least. It is also possible to import one’s Ultima 4 save into Ultima 5, and then from that game to Ultima 6. Both of those games also have rather interesting premises that I will talk about in time.

In the end, I think you should at least try it if you are interested in the history of RPGs. This is the point where Ultima really “gets good” and ditches the nonsense that plagued the early games, though Ultima 7 is still likely a much better starting point for modern players.

The game ends with a call to action. The Quest of the Avatar is a lifelong journey that does not end with the game. You are told to return to your own world and put the virtues you have learned into practice and live as an example to your people, to truly be the avatar.

In the future, other games in the series will challenge and twist these ideals in various ways, but I like the heroic idealism on display here.

#vampire reviews rpgs #ultima 4 #quest of the avatar