#but character art is so fun and i needed to experience joy so i gave myself an afternoon to finish this and now i gotta stop

[peachpety]

Upon reflecting this past year, I’m reminded of one area as a fandom citizen that i am lacking - reading fic. And so was born an idea to canvas my fandom family and friends to share with me a fic they've written, art they've created, a podfic they've recorded in 2023 of which they are most proud.

This two part 'rec yourself' list is the result.

Part One features Drarry creations (heavily featured since that's my OTP). Part Two (here) includes a kick-ass mix of various HP ships and ships from other fandoms, including Carry On, Check Please!, Good Omens, Teen Wolf, and Stranger Things. Also, and most importantly, each entry presents a smol blurb from the creator about why they chose their particular piece as their 2023 favorite.

For ease in reading, I've also placed all submitted works posted to AO3 into a filterable bookmark collection, Rec Yourself 2023. Be aware that there's a range of ratings and archive/creator tags, so please, take appropriate responsibility for your personal consumption. And please also be sure to shower the creators with kudos and lovely comments.

Y'all. This endeavor has been a fucking blast. One thing's for sure, I am blessed, humbled and honored to know a whole bunch of fantastic, brilliant, fun folks. Big love to you all, and thank you for participating.

So go forth. Indulge and enjoy! xo peach

* * *

✩ @pato-roldnart ✩ Quiet as a mouse HP | Viktor Krum x Ron Weasely | ART | G rating | Unleashed!Fest 2023 I'm quite proud of this one, I don't know how I made it, I had never drawn them before! My mind went full "oh yeah ronvik " Also, I like the idea of them bonding over their pets and Ron seeing that Viktor cares about something else that is not Quidditch.

✩ @tontonguetonks ✩ Coffee and a Croissant HP Next Gen | Scorpius x Albus | 903 FIC | G rating There are parts of myself and my lived experience in every story and character I write—how I socialize, how I take my coffee… I can’t help it. In *Coffee and a Croissant*, I put a lot of myself in my ace and autistic Albus. He is very dear to me in this story, and in my Fizzy Lifting Drinks drabble. The fic is just a toe-dip in the Soulmate waters where Albus grapples with what to do if he is someone’s Soulmate, but they’re not his. Parts 2 and 3 are in the works, but there is no timeline on either of them. Maybe in 2024?

✩ @crazybutgood ✩ I Bloom Pink For You HP | Narcissa Malfoy x Pansy Parkinson | 993 FIC + ORIGAMI COMIC | M rating | HP Bodice Ripper Fest 2023 This whole idea came about because I got so excited to fold a corset for hp bodice ripper fest, realised I couldn't just submit that one thing, and started brainstorming more loose ideas. It all clicked together when I was inspired by a fic by @schmem14, whose writing I adore. I was so grateful and even more excited when Em gave permission to make this. From there started the self-indulgent process of folding fancy things with fancier papers for this origami comic, and I couldn't have done it without Em and my lovely support team.

✩ @seekercass ✩ Something Cosmic HP | Cedric x Draco x Harry | 1.7k FIC | M rating | Polyship Week 2022 A self-rec that I am still extremely proud of is a short fic written for Polyshipping Week 2022 called Something Cosmic. It's a small coda to Something Good to Always Keep, another fic that I wrote for Quidditch Fest 2021 that I cherish very much. Even though writing is still hard for me these days, I often think about this 'verse and what life is like for Harry, Draco and Cedric after they graduated from Oxford. These three and slice of life bring me such joy. I hope to write more of them.

✩ @roseharpermaxwell ✩ Sounds Worth It HP | Hermione x Draco | 5k FIC | T rating | D/Hr Advent 2023 Being nominated for d/hr advent was a sweet surprise. It gave me a good excuse to remember how to write and the nudge I needed to create something this year.

✩ @basicallyahedgehog ✩ (They) Keep Me Warm HP | Hermione x Harry x Ron | 5.8k FIC | E rating | HP Trans Fest 2023 This was my transfest fic - I wrote it as a love letter to all my trans and Enby friends and as a way of processing some of my own feelings. It’s my first (and so far only) foray into poly golden trio and I loved playing with their dynamics with that added layer to their relationship.

✩ @lumosatnight ✩ For I Have Found Salvation HP | Harry x Severus | 7.1k FIC | E rating | Snarry AUctoberfest 2023 Although this is a smut fic at its core, I tried really hard to make the pacing flow, bringing in background characters, and creating memorable imagery. I am very proud of how it turned out. However, this is probably my favorite fic from 2023 simply for the fact that I had the most fun writing it!

✩ @sugareey-makes-stuff ✩ Feel You Breathing Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 8.4k TEXTING FIC | E rating | 2023 Year of the OTP This is my fav 2023 piece because I learned how to create a custom text message AO3 skin, stylize things for plain text reading, and I wrote a whole story  that had some plot that was told through text messages. Also, I did not know I could achieve so much spiciness and throw in so many bad pick-up lines through this medium, but hey, the more you know! XD

✩ @schmem14 ✩ Mastermind HP | Harry x Ron; Draco x Harry; Ron x Draco | 10.7k FIC | E rating | Dronarry Fest 2023 This is one of the few times a story just flew out of me. Possessive stalker Draco sets out to win over Ron in this creepy thriller, but there’s a catch: Ron is already in love with Draco’s boyfriend, Harry.

✩ @drwhoisginnyholmes & @fledglinger ✩ Not Bad, For A 6000 Year Old Classic! Good Omens | Aziraphale x Crowley | 11.8k FIC + ART | E rating | DIWS Reverse! Reverse! Mini Bang

✩ @sniperjade ✩ The Sounds of Us HP Marauders | Regulus x Remus | 20.4k FIC | M rating | Remus Lupin Fest 2023; HPFC Spring Fling 2023 I've been thinking about this for a couple of days and whilst I would really love to say it was the drarry I wrote for this fest last year my favourite would have to be this moonseeker I wrote for Remus Lupin Fest last year. It's my favourite because I lived this fic. It became the entirety of my personality for a whole month because I desperately needed to get to the chapter where Regulus was riding on Padfoots back, through the forbidden forest, with only the light of the full moon to guide them, just to try and help Remus. It's also just because it's very musical and I'm very musical so that makes me love it all the more.

✩ @ghaniblue ✩ Sleeping With Ghosts HP | Regulus x Draco x Harry | 21.9k FIC | M rating | Harry Potter Rare Pair Fest IV I posted a Regulus/Harry/Draco fic last month that I'm very fond of. I started writing it more than 1 1/2 years ago, before I ever read a single Regulus fic. It's triad fic, and I'm pretty proud of the way the individual relationships develop. That was important to me, and I think I succeeded. Posting the first fic on ao3 with this triad tag doesn't hurt either.

✩ @celilasart & @wolfspurr ✩ Shifted Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 25k FIC + ART | T rating | Sterek Reverse Bang This work was created for sterek reverse bang, a collaboration fest where the artists create first and the writers write second. wolfspurr and I just clicked when we talked about my art and the things that it inspired in their writer brain ;D the result is just an amazingly sweet and wholesome fic, that is still set in the teenwolf universe as we know it. but unlike many other fics which are full of violence and danger, this one starts with a bang and then it is a beautifully woven story of two people who just complete each other. also... the working title for my art was: tiny fox & sour wolf.

✩ @orange-peony ✩ At the speed of light Carry On | Basilton Pitch x Simon Snow | 26.3k FIC | E rating I picked [this fic] because I had a lot of fun writing it! It started off as a drabble and ended up 26k because I just had a blast writing it and the fandom support was so lovely. Last but not least, Pato made an absolutely stunning art piece for this fic, and it was the best present ever.

✩ @wynnyfryd ✩ i don’t know, you figure it out Stranger Things | Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson | 35.4k WIP FIC | E rating bragging about yourself is difficult, but i’ll just say it’s my favorite because i’m proud of myself for sticking to one project for this long, i love all the artwork the fic has inspired, and i just think the line “the river styx must taste like pennies” fucks severely lmao.

✩ @decaflondonfog ✩ growing pains Check Please! | Eric Bittle x Kent Parson | 50k FIC | T rating i am not usually a long fic gal, which i think is in part lack of patience, but also how attached i get to a universe if i’m working on it for a longer period of time. i finished writing this back in june but this fic felt very “me” in many ways and i think about them so often still  so it’s definitely my 2023 creation i’m proudest of!

#rec yourself 2023 #rec yourself part 2 #rec list #carry on #snowbaz #good omens #aziracrow #hp #dramione #dronarry #moonseeker #ronvik #scorbus #snarry #hermione x harry x ron #narcissa x pansy #regulus x draco x harry #omgcheckplease #bittyparse #stranger things #steddie #teen wolf #sterek

[oziizborn]

My turn.

Usually, I would want to introduse myself. Name, age, hobbies and whatnot. Just like one of those friendship books from the early 90's and 00's. (This might kinda spoil my age). However, over the past few years I somewhat changed - not so much my character, what I enjoy and who I am but mostly how I treat and protect myself. I do believe that keeping personal information to myself is a good start.

A few things I will not be able to keep a secret is my never dying love for BTS since Oct '18, my love for art, sunflowers & @chikooritajjk I am really happy that my precious friend reintroduced me to tumblr. For the past few months, I have been sitting here, wondering where I could release my brain diarrhea. I asked myself "what about a diary?" but that wasn't really it. No judgement here, but to me it would feel like listening to your own voice - you know how that makes you cringe? Yeah, I didn't want that.

Tumblr on the other side feels better, mostly because its accessible for other people as well. Which doesn't mean I want 100 people to read this, but its the thought that I don't write stuff only for myself. If that makes sense. Well, probably not.

BTS

One thing I always loved reading was how Armys discovered BTS, or how some of us say, how BTS found us. I don't want to go too much into my emotional experience and how they indeed found me, but I will always be grateful. Not only because they helped me, and many others through difficult times, but also because of the friends I have made along the way. Whether it was on twitter, in front of the stadium while waiting in line, or when spotting an Army in the wild with a bt21 bag-charm. There is nothing reasonable about NOT being an army. I mean we get the whole thing. Fun, looks (not as important but you get me), friends, music that holds your hand in all possible circumstances. Tough day? listen to Magic Shop, feeling sad? Spring day. Feeling lonely? Mikrokosmos. You wanna feel badass? Blast cypher or we are bulletproof pt.2. We might have planners, scheduled appointments and routines throughout our day. But shit, nothing is guaranteed. Not our good mood, not a good day nor a perfect good nights sleep. Before BTS, these things gave me anxiety and scared the shit out of me. You know what? Sometimes they still do but things got easier. I have an escape. Something we all need. Before BTS it wasnt impossible but also not easy to lift my mood if a minor nuisance affected me. Sure, I did have other favorite songs or things I could do but did those things feel like a warm hug by your best friend? Did they feel as comfortabnle as taking your outside clothes off and wearing your sweatpants and hoodie after a long day? Did they feel like smelling your freshly lit candle that you inhale and it creates a smile on your face without you even noticing? The only thing that gave me the same amount as comfort as these things were things that involved BTS. So when some of us say "they saved me", there's a reason behind it. To some it might be a day that BTS saved, to some it might be something bigger.

With BTS and Army, I went through all kind of emotions. Sadness, happiness, diappointment, anger, fear, pride, exhaustion, excitement, joy, anticipation & most importantly love. (the negative feelings only because of western media) F*** JKLMNOPQRST

This takes me to why @chikooritajjk and I (or Armys in general) are so protective. Who would allow people you conider family/friends to be used, treated badly or negatively in any way. No one. I have no shame in calling them my family or friends. They might not know what I look like or who I am - but to them I'm Army and that's all that counts. What else would you call giving and receiving love, comfort and protection from another human? I'm not going to lie, I also had a shitton of fun pressing people's faces in their own shit they let out their moufssss.

Talk shit, get hit.

Last but not least

I dedicate this part to @chikooritajjk God knows the amount of gratitude I have to him for making me cross paths with BTS and letting you come in my life. You've been the greatest gift to me, ever. You helped me in so many ways. The most important thing that you helped me see is that I am more than just that person that is there for others.. You helped me understand that I am also me, a person with desires, dreams, a battery that can be drained and with wishes and beliefs. I can't thank you enough for that. From the day I wished you were my friend to this day, we made so many good, sad, teaching, beautiful and precious memories. We truly had it all. You know what makes me happier than talking to you? Hearing the positive things I have contributed to your life. Maybe it will make me sound selfish but I promise it's not about me, or what I did but its about the fact that YOU allow me to be there for you, to talk to you, to spend time with you and to be your friend. Man, I am going to sound super fangirl-y but what I mean is I accomplished being good enough to be your friend. Remember when you said you are obsessed with me? I think I am the obsessed one. If someone I liked, friend or not just sits in front of me and tells me "hey I like your bracelet" I will be like TAKE IT, IT'S YOURS! (unless its from @chikooritajjk.) I love sharing, I love putting a smile on people's faces. When it comes to you though, nah. You are nobody's but my best friend. I love you so much and trust me, I will knock anyone out for you, ANYTIME. Verbally and/or physically.

Joonie "I wish there was a better word than love. but i really, truly love you."

Hobi is my bias. So here.

[elwenyere]

Thank you so much for this wonderful ask, @frostbitebakery​ (and sorry for somehow losing the original message)!!! It was a treat to get to reflect on this. I love most of my children mostly equally most of the time, but I tried to pick five fics (one each from five ships) that have a special place in my heart.

Citation Needed (MCU, Stony), co-written with @festiveferret​

Professor AU where Tony is a history prof trying to track down an obscure reference to “Project Rebirth” while also avoiding the irritating new hire in Fine Arts, Dr. Grant. I can honestly say this is the most fun I’ve had writing a fic: collaborating with Ferret was a delight and a dream, the worldbuilding was a really exciting puzzle to put together, and I got to write some punishingly niche jokes that I will admit still make me laugh.

Longing (MCU, Sambucky)

In which Sam gets pulled into a memory machine and Bucky goes after him. This fic was such a stretch for me in so many ways: technically, characterologically, emotionally. One of my goals was to explore some of the moments (canon and extra-canon) that make Sam into the character we see in TFATWS. It was the first time I really felt like I'd gotten possessed by a story, and it's still stuck very deep in my feels. There's a sequence in chapter three, starting with the moment in the desert, that felt like an absolute sprint of joy to write.

Recollection (The Clone Wars, Codywan)

Or, Purge Trooper Cody and the Eternal Sunshine of the Reconditioned Mind. Speaking of stories that stretched my abilities, I had laughably little idea how complicated this fic was going to be to orchestrate when I conceived of the idea. It was a juicy challenge for my brain and also a tough challenge for my heart, because I fell into a new level of love for Cody at the same time that I was putting him through the wringer. One of the best parts of the experience was how many moments surprised me - like the final line of dialogue in the bunk sequence in chapter three, which I did not have in mind at all when I started writing the scene but ended up being one of my all-time favorite lines.

Aller-Retour (Andor, Melshian)

a.k.a. 5 times Melshi and Cassian helped each other return from a mission + 1 time they helped someone else get started. The cliff scene in episode 1.11 of Andor took me out at the knees, and this fic gave me a chance to explore what it might look like for Melshi and Cassian to keep holding each other up during their years in the Rebellion. The scenes of caretaking not only fulfilled my personal, insatiable need for hurt/comfort but also gave me a space to process something I've been working through in all of my Melshian fics: what it looks like to love someone in the face of losing them. 

When the Time Comes (Top Gun, Hangster and Bradley & Mav)

a.k.a. 5 times someone held Bradley + 1 time he held someone else. This is the most personal fic I’ve ever written, and I honestly did not expect that to happen with Top Gun, but grief is a strange beast, and I truly loved writing this.

---

Thank you again, for the ask, Frost!!! This was really fun to put together. <3<3<3

#self recs #thank you frost!!!

[quick-catton]

Hi quick-catton!! First of all I love your page and I love your personality💕💕💕 I also LOVE Saturn and Felix and Oliver just-😫😫😫 I love it every time you post, it makes my day!! Right now I just really need your help. Today I had to go on another account just to send something to my ask box because since I started my account last year, I’ve gotten nothing and it really hurts.

I love how open and freaky you are in your posts and I’m honestly the same way with Saltburn and an anime fandom that I’ve shaped my blog around. I used to be a little calm and collected but you’re inspiring to just let go and let my freak flag fly but the problem is, with my fandom, I don’t think people are going to be very inviting. Like literally the only thing I wanna do right now is babygirl code my favorite anime character sooo badly but I’m afraid I’ll lose all my followers and when I try to I get no engagement.

Like I wrote three freaking paragraphs about how good he’d look with a navel piercing! That was this morning and I got nothing all day but four likes. No reblogs, no comments, I literally had to make another account and send myself some praise for that post just so I could post it to show people that at least someone else agrees with me.

And I know I should give it time but that’s the problem. Some of my other posts like that don’t grow. They just get five likes and that’s it and it sucks because all I wanna do is engage with people that want to see this boy in lingerie or a skirt or goddamn pregnant (told you I was a freak)

I just don’t know what to do. How do you deal that? I’m honestly this close to deleting my account coz it seems like I’m posting to a blank wall and it’s so embarrassing coz everyone can see it. Sorry this is so long! Thank you for quickcatton 💕💕

WAH ANON ur so sweet omg, thank you?? <33 honestly i feel like i don't have good advice because i only made a tumblr for the first time EVER at the beginning of january!!! i am 23 and had never set foot on this app, but i saw that most of the saltburn fandom was here, so i gave it a shot and i've just been learning as i go.

i think that's half of my 'luck' with having a good experience on this app, is that because this fandom is so fresh, it's super active, but it's also a very small fandom (relative to some others) so we're all kinda like a hivemind here LOL, and because of the source material of the movie itself being weird/freaky/psychosexual, we all know that anything goes and the more freaky the brainrot, the better! i'm in other fandoms where if i said half of the shit i say here, i'd be ostracized, so it's really a case by case basis unfortunately </3

ik i yap a lot here but i also hold back sooo much because even tho ik we're all weirdos here, i still get nervous about putting out my writing or not having people vibe with an idea– you're not alone in that, i promise. it helps forming friendships in your fandoms so you know that there'll always be people who you can get hype over ideas with, but i know that's easier said than done sometimes <3

i don't have advice on engagement because i honestly don't look at that stuff (which i know is so annoying to say lol but it's true); i made this account purely to have a place to dump brainrot/art etc and view other people's saltburn content and i didn't care about engagement, i just got lucky to meet some cool people and make close friends through it.

i think if people can tell you're having fun through your posts, they'll vibe with you! it does take time with the good ol' algorithm, i'm sure, but as long as your page brings YOU joy, that's what matters most. people don't have to agree with your takes, life is too short to be vanilla and water urself down for others :^) making fandom friends and gaining interactions will come along with being yourself, but if posting here and running the account feels more stressful to you than it is fun, it's okay to step away too!

if you're on ao3 and sites like that, leaving comments on your fave works can be a great way to get conversations going as well. i met my closest friend on here bc she stumbled across my fic on ao3 and then sent me a message; it was purely up to chance, but branching out and being brave starting conversations with your fave accounts can be a great way to feel more included in the fandoms you're in and maybe you'll meet cool people along the way!! <33

#if anyone else has other advice feel free to reply with it <33 #because i'm not good at this stuff LOL #i literally just open this app say shit and then go back to yapping in a google doc #also this made me realize idk if i've ever put my name anywhere on this account #so i just added it to my display/pinned hi i'm sam #quick-catton asks

[ina-nis]

I was discussing with my therapist how frustrated I’m feeling because I cannot rely on fantasy and fiction as a coping mechanism anymore. Haven’t been able to for several months now. It has burnt me out from doing any art and writing (other than journaling) and I’ve been reduced to someone who forces creativity so I can keep focused on something other than the loneliness.

Yes, those are things I’m passionate about so it’s not like it’s a bad thing at all... it just feels like a chore and it’s not exactly fun anymore, at least for now.

I was brought to tears when they mentioned this is probably because of something concrete that would/could come.

It makes sense.

I’m unable to rely on fantasy and fiction anymore because of my concrete needs in real life.

It’s an extremely uncomfortable place to be. Brings me a lot of anguish and straight up agony.

Of course, I’d immerse myself into romance and sex in fiction. Seeing characters in love, seeing their stories develop, their tragedies and their joy and savour each of those moments as an viewer, and as writer and as an artist myself, too.

When I look back, the very reason why I started was because of my needs.

They remained unmet from... when I was very little. Or they were met half-way, or - as always - they came with a catch, a condition, were temporary, they ended.

I’ve been languishing in the fantasy of being loved and wanted for as long as I remember.

I made worlds where there was conflict and also love, a lot of love, a lot of conflict. As I grew older, my worlds started dissipating into distant memories, but I could always use other people’s. I latched onto characters, I made them get together, I made them love and make love. I saw their world and decided I wanted to explore the romance and physicalities, and build upon that.

It saved me. It kept me going. It gave my love, my feelings, and my longing an outlet.

It doesn’t work anymore.

Despite the fact that I still find romantic love an abstract concept, metaphoric, which feels intangible for me. When I fall in love, it’s all by myself. It doesn’t have to do with anyone else.

I fall in love all the time. I’m always in love. With ideas, objects and especially, people. My love for people feels magnificent, it takes my breath away, it’s no wonder I long for it so much.

I’m not sure what changed or why, nor why it’s happening now, but it probably has to do with the fact that I’ve been doing a lot of work to address my mental illnesses. There’s now enough space in my brain for older issues to surface, and oh, they did so spectacularly!

In my experiences in therapy, whenever I dealt with an internal discomfort such as this, it was a sign that I was, in fact, looking in the right places and addressing the right things.

“I’m here and won’t leave. Do something about it.” says the loneliness that inhabits me.

And it’s not letting me use fabricated versions of the things I need since it’s all avoidance.

It’s a difficult place to be. Escapism had its place until it became detrimental, and without any other “substitute,” it collapsed. It was avoidance, plain and simple. Now, that I can’t avoid that anymore, I’m at a loss about what to do. It was painful before and it feels much more now.

However, yes, the fact that I cannot rely on fantasy anymore to get my needs met means I’ll have to take action, one way or another.

My fated meeting with reality is long overdue, as it turns out living a fantasy is not exactly feasible long term.

A sign of something concrete to come, huh?

#avpd #avoidance #avoidant #Avoidant Personality Disorder #loneliness #inanis post

[cirusthecitrus]

I posted 4,782 times in 2022

That's 2,498 more posts than 2021!

43 posts created (1%)

4,739 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@edge-lorde

@average-monster

@chiqita

@ankle-beez

@argayology

I tagged 986 of my posts in 2022

#horde prime - 62 posts

#spy x family - 55 posts

#amphibia spoilers - 52 posts

#spop - 36 posts

#ramblings - 31 posts

#shera - 30 posts

#kur twins tag - 26 posts

#ask memes - 26 posts

#spacebats - 22 posts

#spop au - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 83 characters

#Энтрапта такая: 'тебя когда пиздили в последний раз? никогда? значит начнут нахуй!'

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Bury me on a flower field

But don't cover my withered eyelids

So that at least something will sprout out of them

Since a happy person has not grown out of me

[Дарья Виардо - Ангел похоронитель]

-----------------------------------------

Had a sudden urge to draw the third page for that one entrapdak fam comic I did a while ago :))))

I know explaining your own art is cringe and pretentious but I want to scream about this page so bad so please don't mind my silly commentary ><

Forgot to add, but here Anillis also calls Hordak "Poppy!". The very first thing baby Prime did when he saw Hordak was to give him a name (or rather a nickname)

Сomparing Hordak's eyes with poppy flowers, Anillis literally shows acceptance and appreciation for his imperfections, the very "defect" his (Prime's) future self will despise so much

Literally everything about the song and it's lyrics makes me wanna go feral gpfohpfphp (but it's so hard to translate i hate it here might've missed translation error too :/)

Hordak looking so lost, and vulnerable and younger and so full of HOPE-

I'm still unsure whether or not everything holo-Anillis did and said was pre-recorded so this part is up to interpretation

Either way, it's still not Prime who talks to Hordak and gives him the flower and smiles at him with joy and excitement. Prime is dead

AND THE FLOWER IS NOT REAL

also NOT a fun fact: In spacebats' culture a term "Flower eyes" was sometimes used when reffering to someone who is dead (and the fact that Anillis is pointing at his eye aka at himself HELP)

As well as they symbolize remembrance and eternal sleep(death) poppy flowers are also associated with sleep in general. In that case, could this image of Anillis be a hint that neither Hordak nor Kadroh are fully "awake" yet and still need to open their eyes to some things about themselves, their past and their dead tyrant brother? I dunno c:

Again, I'm so completely normal about this comic and this AU like-

65 notes - Posted August 29, 2022

#4

Kur twins' outfit desgins

Sooo I finally sat down and decided on final designs for Anillis (young Prime) and his brother Hec-Tor!

These are their regular day-to-day looks (how they'll appear in my Horde Prime's origin story, or Kur twins au, how I'm going to call it from now on)

Despite very lazy simple rendering ( i wanted to focus on it more at first, but then the file crushed a few times so i gave up lol) I still can say these drawings are quite detailed, so tap/click to stare at them in higher quality c:

See the full post

95 notes - Posted February 15, 2022

#3

And if the bridges have been burnt

You'll find another way

Even a broken clock

Is right twice a day

When there are no words left

When screams turn into whispers

We will realize

That it was all just a painful experience

[Ploho - Горький Опыт]

See the full post

133 notes - Posted April 28, 2022

#2

Oh wow can't believe Crystal Castles are such big spacebats fans that they dedicated a huge chunk of their discography to Hordak and his brothers🙏😔/j

200 notes - Posted October 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

An interesting Hordak/Entrapta parallel i can't stop thinking about

At a certain point in their lives both of them 1) were exiled and basically sent to die by someone who was important to them and whom they fully trusted (a friend/family/god) 2) got stuck in a strange place, isolated from the rest of the world/universe, all alone (lol speaking of trauma bonds...)

Two very similar and yet very different situations. And here’s the fun part: the main difference between Entrapta and Hordak’s stories is the opposite ways in which they react to their opposite circumstances, cope with and adapt to new changes

See the full post

223 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

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#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #not horde prime being my №1 tag 😭 #and out of all my long ass tags it chose the one in russian t-t the one where i talk bout entrapta threatening to beat the shit out of sb

[crest-of-gautier]

i did a bit of replaying of fes today and let me tell you I AM THE HAPPIEST LIZZY to have walked the earth!!! I LOVE THIS GAME!!! even if i only played the first four days (im on april 18th and i did NOT go up to the 4th floor to talk to ikutsuki). random talking under the cut...

i genuinely think that the animated cutscenes in fes still hold up. im so charmed by the manga panel expression cut ins + the little 💦❓⁉ types of emotes that pop over the characters heads and the waist-up portraits. and i unironically love the models they're really cute. minato is too cute he's too perfect for my eyes i think he needs to be blown up immediately.

i think it's really neat to see the different social links and other party members very briefly in those "minato walks through (xyz) location" scenes. i was so excited 2 see them i was like!! visible exclamation point over my head bc i do treasure some of these SLs so much...

for shits and giggles on the full moon on the 9th, when you're supposed to be running up to the 5th floor. i decided to walk around the second floor and interact with things. i really enjoyed the additional dialogue bits from yukari there.

honestly a common trend that seems to happen a lot whenever i play p3 is just a spike in my love for yukari. like. i already love her a lot as is but whenever i see her dialogue again i just am filled with so much overwhelming love for how much she sticks to her values i just think it's so so nice how much she values honesty and transparency and i think i would like to try and articulate it better at some other point. she's so good.

and i think whenever i see the yukari moments from playing through p3 it always makes me so... (microwaves myself and blows up), i guess, disgruntled? that she got shafted SO hard in the movies like damn no wonder why i didn't really get into her brain space they barely gave us any time to peel her brain layers 😭 (though this is hardly exclusive to yukari).

ANYWAY my replay will probably be a very slow one, i really enjoy sitting through cutscenes and thinking about them and uh! persona has a lot of them. i think it'll be nice to do this in the evenings sometimes, though. i forgor how good the opening to the game was it's such a fun way to throw the player into the experience.

AND!!! it's definitely causing my brain chemicals to jump for joy and yipee over art ideas like OHHH IM SO!!! i love interacting with the source material again it's so nice to be reminded of the bits that resonated with you or things that you might've glossed over yet still are significant in the grand scheme of things. i've wanted to draw p3 again but when a lot of my ideas were just hanging around in my brain for a year or two sometimes i get attached 2 how it looks in my head and dont think ill b able to translate that so. its nice. 2 have new ideas on the chopping block.

GOD i love p3 and hmgnhh. i will always love to revisit fes i think. even though reload will be a thing. i think i am oddly entranced by how "dated" some of these mechanics are. like tiredness. or no part-time job. or the no party control. its such a fun way of informing minato's characterization that isn't really there when you try to make p3 closer to "modernsona" methinks BUT ANYWAY. thats all from me.

#lizz.txt #lizz.jpg #p3fes #ermm i hope no one frequents the fes tag i dont wanna be majorly perceived on this blog loool #especially this isn't really put together this is just me spitballing my love into the void haha #im mostly tagging it for archival purposes on my blog i like being able 2 see my classifications... #i love revisiting these games but also wow there r a lot of cutscenes gklhlghhfd #makes me wonder how much energy i'll have when playing reload lmaoo but THATS NOT MY PROBLEM RN!! #sighs. i love u minato. i love u p3. thank you for being such a great game to worm around in my brain #they mean everything to me....

[calliecat93]

Okay I think I'm mostly recovered, so here's the good and bad abut my Disney Wish vacation~!

THE GOOD

Really most everything but I guess I'll do some specifics

We got Concierge service and while it's expensive, it is 100% worth the cost OMG. Just the way it cut the boarding/disembarking time and made it much easier was worth every penny. But the staff, the longue, the perks- all was just so great~!

The ship itself is HUGE and has so much to do~!

As I said, the Concierge Lounge, as is the adult area, is lovely. I got to be in an infinity pool for the first time and gosh what a view~!

The views. OMG the VIEW~!

It was my first time out of the USA (went to The Bahamas) and while the experience was... rough, we went to this conservation garden area and seeing all the animals was so great~!

Meeting so many characters! The only ones I met that I hadn't in DIsney World were Pluto, Daisy, Moana, and Rapunzel. But even meeting the ones I had before was still a joy. When I told Mickey that the last time I saw him was 20 years ago? He immediately gave me the biggest hug and it truly felt like I was a little girl again meeting him. I almost cried XD

The food was fabulous~! The restaurants were also nice. There was a Frozen-themed one, a Marvel-themed, and 1923 which had TOMS of memorabilia of several classic and modern animated features. There were cels, concept art (some even having the animators and Nine Old Men's notes on them~!), models, and other trinkets from the era, and needless to say, 1923 was my favorite~!

I went to two karaoke events. The first time I sang the Christina Aguilera version of Reflection, the second time I did For the First tIme in Forever. My mom said I got the best reception both times haha~! She also filmed them so once things are a bit more calmed down I'll see if she'll send me the vids so I can post them.

Overall, I had an absolutely fantastic time~!

The Bad

As I kind of alluded to, The Bahamas was... ehhh. The location of Nassau itself was lovely (busy, but so are most big cities), but our excursion? The disembarking was utterly chaotic and disorganized, we had to wait on a bus in the heat for like... half an hour, and the drive to and back was rocky. We got a tour and tbh, it was a pretty underwhelming tour. Needless to say, we're probably not going to do an excursion again if we go again.

We saw an Aladdin show. The show itself was fun, but it started I think close to an hour late. Obviously, stuff like this happens and these people are worked to death enough so I'm not mad about it, but it was annoying at the time.

The ship actually broke down while we were in The Bahamas. Apparently, they even had to fly some mechanics in to get it going again. As such we had to skip the cruise's island. Now this wasn't so bad for me and my mom since it let us do more on the ship, but it just sucks for the staff because SO many people were angry. Seriously if you go on one of these cruises, be nice to the crew and staff. They are trying their damnest and there are many things beyond their control. They get it hard enough from higher-ups, we don't need to make it worst for them.

DEAR LORD PARENTS NEED TO LEARN TO CONTROL THEIR KIDS. The number of young children running around, getting rough, not listening to their parents, etc was utterly unnecessary. I know it's a vacation but your jobs as parents don't stop. Mine would have NEVER let me act like that and they sure as Hell didn't in Disney World 20 years ago. Part of it may be because they were cooped up on a ship, but still.

It was really hard to find your way around the ship. The safety drill was also utterly chaotic. Not much else to say there.

So it wasn't flawless, but what vacation is? Despite those downer points, I overall had such a fantastic time. And due to the ship breaking down, we actually got a 20% discount for the next one that's valid up to 2025, which was a fair trade to me~! The dogs also did super well with their dog-sitter which is what I was most anxious about because Petey doesn't really like strangers (Dante loves everyone so I wasn't worried about him as much), but that makes us less worried about going anywhere. But yeah, I'm hoping to go on another cruise one of these days even if it isn't Disney cause it was such a lovely time~! It was my first time on a ship and was something I'd always wanted to do and I loved it~! But I am glad to be home with my dogs and cat haha.

[wozman23]

2022 Game of the Year List

I didn’t quite play as many games this year. Last year I completed 58. This year, a paltry 39. With more and more AAA games like Horizon Forbidden West and God of War: Ragnarok requiring 60+ hours of my time, its hard to squeeze in smaller experiences. I feel like it was also a bit of an off year in terms of games that really wowed me. As a person who is always fascinated with new IP, nothing in AAA satisfied there. There were some good indies, but even there nothing really blew me away. Plus, I gave up most of my prime gaming time on Sundays, my only day off, in favor of meeting people for a run/walk most weeks. Still I had a ton of fun along the way. Here are my ten favorite games, some honorable mentions, a dozen or so advertisements for Game Pass, and the ten games I look forward to most (some of which are coming to Game Pass). 1. Onde

Much like weird indie games in past years, I found this little game thanks to browsing Steam. It’s super weird and abstract. I really doesn’t even fit in any mold and I can’t really even begin to explain it. It’s kind of a platforming game, but kind of just an interactive art experience. You really just have to see it in action. My two and a half hour playthrough was wonderfully weird and beautiful, as well as tranquil and peaceful. It’s exactly the type of thing I crave: a game unlike any other I’ve ever played. 

2. Tinykin

I played the Tinykin demo on Steam early in the year and it quickly found a spot in my most anticipated list. It’s indie Pikmin. That’s it! That’s really all you need to know. It doesn’t reinvent the wheel, but I had a blast exploring every nook and cranny of the world. And it was basically free thanks to Game Pass! 

3. Tunic

I’m a huge fan of the original Legend of Zelda. I still think it is the best entry in the series. Tunic isn’t shy about showing how Zelda-like it tried to be. The cute looking but cruel world was a joy to explore and understand. But the standout part of it for me was the manual feature. Collecting pages to assemble the game’s manual, that felt like the type you’d get in the days of the NES, and slowly discovering where to go and what to do was brilliant. The way it revealed secrets was perfect. (Full disclosure: I did look up a few of the solutions to some of the more obtuse optional puzzles at then end of the game.) This one really stand out as something special, akin to games like The Witness and Fez. Plus, again, Game Pass!

4. Stray

I’d been following Stray for a long time. It perked my ears up back in May of 2018, when it was just a few gifs and known simply as “HK Project.” As a cat lover, it was one of my most anticipated games. The world was breathtaking. Some of the animations could have been better, but perfectly creating the subtleties of a cat’s locomotion and mannerisms isn’t easy, especially considering the project was tackled by a first time, small indie developer. Still, they captured the spirit of a cat very well and created an empathic character. And how can I complain when it was another virtually free game thanks to the new PlayStation Plus structure - even if the main reason I upgrade was just for the kitty. At the end, I kind of wanted more, but was also pleased with what we got.

5. God of War: Ragnarok

Despite the widespread praise of God of War (2018), it was a mixed bag for me at the time, mainly because it strayed from the series’ roots. It was good, but it didn’t really do anything overly special for me. In a lot of ways, Ragnarok was a step forward. The story was amazing! The characters were amazing, especially Odin! There were so many cool moments and reveals. But I still have mixed opinions about the state of Sony’s AAA games. I put 60 hours into Ragnarok. So I definitely got my money’s worth in terms of time spent with it. The optional missions and bosses were challenging, mostly enjoyable, and usually worth the extra time. But a lot of the game felt like a quest to simply unlock chests instead of progressing the story. At certain points, it felt like a slog where, I was just checking off boxes to hit 100% completion and get my platinum trophy. It’s insane that the 8-10 hour experience of the original typical gamer fantasy God of War on PS2 has turned into such a massive, well written experience. But it also sucks that it takes five years to realize that vision. There were things that happened in the game, and references to the first game that perplexed me, because I have only faint recognition of the moments from five years ago. When I look back at it I remember killing trolls, opening a bunch of chests, and Kratos saying “Boy” a lot. But the finer details like who we killed, and how the characters are related escaped me. So again, I see the game for its triumphs, but also for its issues as a product of modern game development. But I seem to be in the minority on this opinion. I’m not sure where the franchise goes from here. I’m hoping for Egyptian mythology as I’ve always preferred it to Norse mythology.

6. Moss: Book II

The original Moss was one second only to AstroBot Rescue Mission when it came to PS VR games. I loved how it succeeded at making a VR game that actually felt like a traditional game, and also how it made Quill feel so lifelike. I hadn’t witnessed that sense of empathy with a character ever before. I was so invested in her journey, and super excited when the sequel was announced. Sure it was more of the same, but it gave me a great reason to dust of my PS VR. The boss battles were the high points for me. I’m not sure what the future holds for the franchise. I don’t really know if I’ll want to buy PS VR2. But a Moss: Book III could coax me into it. 

7. Nobody Saves the World

I love Drinkbox. The Guacamelee! series made me a massive fan of the studio. Nobody Saves the World is just what I would expect from them: a stylist game with a lot of quirky fun. The variety of characters was impressive. The macabre look was silly. And the constant sense of progression via objectives and upgrades had me hooked from the start to my finish, over 30 hours later. I don’t go for 1000/1000 of the achievements in games all too often. Here I did, I loved every little thing I had to do to get there. And, yeppers, Game Pass once again saved me money that I’d already expected to spend.

8. Horizon Forbidden West Horizon was my favorite new IP of the last generation. Guerrilla really built something impressive with the franchise. Yet the same cons from God of War: Ragnarok are present here: a lengthy development time, padding, and so much content that it kind of got in its own way. The new beasts were impressive, as were the new weapons. But overall the world and story didn’t fascinate me as much. I’d have liked much more about Ted Faro, and the story about the red blight, which seemed important pre-release, never really went anywhere. Still, I spent 97 hours exploring the Forbidden West - my most out of any game this year - and look forward to the DLC. 9. FAR: Changing Tides

I played FAR: Lone Sails a few years back. I went in not knowing much, and left with my jaw on the floor. It was such a beautiful, enjoyable experience. Much like many sequels, Changing Tides couldn’t quite match the magic of the original. The water sections were an interesting addition, but the game also had some rough edges. Still the ending of it was well worth the brief ride. Also, Game Pass!

10. Cuphead: The Delicious Last Course

Cuphead was my GOTY back in 2017. It’s probably one of my favorite games ever! So more Cuphead is fine by me. And that’s exactly what this was. More lovingly, painstakingly handcrafted quintessential Cuphead. There wasn’t a lot to it, but it’s quality over quantity. I really can’t wait to see what’s next for Studio MDHR! Honorable Mentions: High on Life - I’m not really a fan of the Rick and Morty style of comedy these days, so the juvenile comedy and it’s weird verbose cadence was hit or miss with me, often finding itself on the “miss” side. Just the volume and way the character often talk, which seems to be prevalent in many modern cartoons, annoys me. The game also has quite a few technical issues at release and horrendous load times on Xbox One. The gameplay and shooting mechanics aren’t super polished either, and don’t feel all that satisfying. But the talking weapons themselves were really cool! And the thing that made them even cooler was the voice cast, particularly the former SNLers JB Smoove and Tim Robinson. Their silly performances, in addition to Laura Silverman’s, kept me playing. And clocking in at just 12 hours for me, it didn’t overstay its welcome. Also, ugg, its Game Pass, its a game on Xbox Game Pass, on the Xbox game console, where you have a pass where you can play g-games, and you d-d-don’t even gotta, uhhh, you don’t have to pay for them, the games on the pass, cuz they’re on the Game Pass! (End annoying Rick and Morty impression) Shadow Warrior 3 - This series is just good fun, with a freedom of gameplay reminiscent of the modern Doom games. The art style is great, and the level design really just encourages you to play around. A lot of times these days, games are trying to be like movies, or be serious and realistic. But there’s something to be said about a cheesy game that knows its place and just prioritizes fun. And this one came to PlayStation Plus fairly quickly so it was another freebie. A Plague Tale: Requiem - Thanks to info from someone, I learned that I can play Xbox Series X games on my Xbox One via the cloud, which makes me feel like I’m living in the future. It’s absurd that Microsoft would allow me to mooch off new games with my old technology. I really don’t see any reason to upgrade my console. This series is really unique. Without spoiling things, it does some really cool things with the rat plague, and is another game that just has some (mostly) fun gameplay. There were a few frustrating stealth sections for me, as well as a few combat sections. And the pacing was a bit inconsistent. It started out slow, and got a bit long in the tooth towards the end. But it occupies that sweet spot between AAA and indie that we just don’t see that often anymore. And with Game Pass, it’s well worth a look on PC, Series X, or through the wizardry of Xbox One. Disc Room (2020) - It was always on my enormous list of games to play, but with so many good looking games, I just never got around to it since there were so many games that were higher on my list of things to try. But Game Pass to the rescue! I love a good arcade style game. And this was just that: a cool concept, with a decent challenge, and a nice sense of progression. Over the course of a few hours, it presented ideas, iterated on them a bit, and wish me a lovely farewell, requiring 49 less days to experience than Horizon did. I’m glad I finally got around to it, because it really surprised me. Deathloop (2021) - This game never really interested me. I really haven’t been a fan of any of the games coming out of Arkane. But when it came to PlayStation Plus, I had nothing to play at the time, so I gave it a try. I ended up spending 23 hours with it. I really enjoyed how they incorporated the time travel ideas. And the gameplay and abilities stayed fresh nearly the whole time, although the nebulous nature of figuring out how to assassinate a target or two, and the repetitive nature that came along with it, did bring about a bit of monotony. Somerville - Somerville was one of the oldest game I was following that was still in active development, probably since around 2015. It looked like it could be the next great atmospheric platformer, the next Inside. Sadly, it is not a good game. So why is it on this list? Because despite its plethora of problems and odd design choices - unrefined mechanics, clunky animations, poor environmental readability that led to confusion on where to go, envionmental geometry to get stuck on, ladders that you had to be perfectly aligned with to climb, freezes and technical issues, an overall jankiness, a poor execution of multiple endings as well as the “good “ ending, and just an overall nebulousness that undermines practically everything it tries to do - there’s a really intriguing, mysterious world there. I would have been disappointed had I spent money on it. But giving it a look on Game Pass could be worth your time if you can see past its flaws.

That’s it for this year. I’ve still got plenty of games that came out that I want to play, and I’ll start up Rainbow Billy and the Curse of the Leviathan (now on Game Pass) soon, but most of my anticipated ones were completed. Who knows what remaining 2022 games may turn up on future GOTY lists? Lost in Play looks cool, but has eluded me so far, OlliOlli World got good reviews, I totally missed the release of The Quarry. I’ll probably eventually get around to the Nintendo games like Splatoon 3 and Kirby, and maybe try the Tiny Tina game after getting a bit burned out with Borderlands. Most Anticipated Games:

1. Alan Wake 2 - The original is one of my favorite games. I’m so glad we’re finally getting this! 2. Pepper Grinder - I been following this one on twitter for a while. The developer went silent for a while, but has been back showing things off again. It looks so friggin cool! 3. SCHiM - definitely a Joey-style indie that looks unlike anything else 4. Hades II - Hades really surprised me and consumed a lot of my time. This probably will too. I just hope it does enough to warrant a sequel and doesn’t bring on the sophomore slump that I often feel with sequels. 5. Horizon Forbidden West - Burning Shores DLC - Its more Horizon so I’m going to play it. Do I expect anything revolutionary? No. Just more fun Horizon. 6. Cocoon - When this was announced, my fascination mainly relied on one simple fact: It’s Jeppe Carlsen’s next game - the brilliant mind who brought us 140 and worked on the Playdead games, Limbo and Inside. What Cocoon exactly is is still a bit of a mystery to me. But I can’t wait to see it unfurl its wings. 7. Judas - Who wouldn’t be excited about Ken Levine’s new game, which looks to be the spiritual successor to Bioshock. I can’t wait to see more on this one! 8. Viewfinder - This was a pleasant surprise during The Game Awards. A stylized first person puzzle game! That’s so in my wheelhouse!  9. The Plucky Squire - Here’s another game that blew me away with its trailer: some 2D, some 3D, a bunch of different gameplay concepts, all with a wonderful coat of paint. I think this could easily find its way near the top of next year’s GOTY list, much like Tinykin did this year. 10. Atomic Heart - I’ve been interested in this one for a while too, since even before Stray. It’s also got some cool Bioshock-y vibes, with a really interesting looking world. The only concern is the recent news that the development has been troubled and that trailers were basically just vertical slices. But it’s on Game Pass, so the risk of paying for it is eliminated.

[earthxangell]

who is your soulmate + channeled love letter || pick-a-card-reading

Take a few deep breaths and let your intution guide you towards a certain pile. Choose a gif and read the meaning down below.  

Only for fun purposes. Based on information that my intuition, astrology oracle deck and tarot gave me + automathic writing. Take what resonates and leave everything else behind.

If you want to leave a tip (it’s not necessary but always appreciated): ko-fi.com/earthxangel 

Pile 1

Oracle: Your soulmate may soon experience Saturn return or already doing that. Big 3 in Capricorn or Taurus. Capricorn Sun/Moon, Taurus Sun/Moon. Saturn-Sun aspects, Stelliums or major placements in 2, 8 and 7 houses. Strong Jupiter placements. Pluto in 7th House. Abundant, reliable, responsible, organized, failed attempts at relationships or may have experienced rough endings or blockages when it comes to romantic partners. Care about their image and social status, like attention. Have business or a very stable & secure job, don’t have troubles with money. 

Angel numbers: 50(50), 2(2(2(2))), 52(52), 32(32), 7(7(7(7))). 31(31), 14(14), 11(1(1)), 26(26).

Tarot: Your soulmate had seen the world around them as pure restrictions and competition for the place under the sun. Felt like a survival show at some point or another. ‘The Hunger Games’, you may say. It took a lot of time for them to see that it’s not true & understand that they’re actually pretty free to do anything they want. So they did. They feel very lucky to have a harmonius and stable life. It’s a victory that they worked really hard for. If you’ve already met each other - they think that they won, when it comes to you. The fact that both of your give and recieve equally makes them feel happy and proud. It feels quite nostalgic too - maybe you had connection in the past life as well. They worry a lot about financial and material things - it’s the main source of happiness, security and joy for them. It’s very important for your soulmate to have a solid & strong foundation. They need to feel grounded & surrounded by material wealth, otherwise they’d freak out and won’t feel safe. They strive for a peaceful and honorable life when they get old so they could look back and see how much they have achieved and that they don’t have to prove anything to anyone anymore. They want to gain respect & attention from others. They want to be recognized for what they do.  

Love letter: “I love you. Sometimes I think these 3 words aren’t enough to describe what I truly feel for you. It’s hard to put my feelings into words as well so this is why I’m trying to show you it with my actions. I know that I don’t say cute stuff to you like those characters from your favorite stories or tv shows you’re always talking about but I hope my stable and reliable presence is more than enough to prove you my true feelings. I’m sorry that I don’t say ‘I love you” that much but maybe I should start doing it more often because I love how your eyes sparkle and shine when I’m doing so. You’re the most beautiful person in my life. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you. Please, don’t ever leave my side because I’m not planning to leave yours like...ever. You’re too important for me to do so.”

Pile 2

Oracle: Karmic relationship, past life connection, stelliums or major placements in 5, 8, 9 or 12 houses, big 3 in Gemini, Sagittarius, Capricorn. Venus in Libra, Pisces or Scorpio. Very spiritual person, religious, may practice some sort of a magic or etc. Very wise and likes to learn stuff. Know how to dress and always look good. Libra Rising. Sensitive as well. May express themselves through art, writing or other creative hobbies. 

Angel numbers: 36(36), 33(33), 44(4), 29(29), 32(32), 22(22), 42(42), 40(40), 21(21), 15(15), 

Tarot: Balanced & mature person when it comes to their feelings, they don’t like to lie about things even if it’s making a profit for them. They’re very honest & know their way around people - talkative, wise, have a great sense of humor and undeniable charisma. Likes to travel & see the world, even if it’s the nearest town from them - it’s still an adventure. Like to go on a walks, hiking. Very quick to take actions when they have an idea - otherwise, they’ll burn out and move onto another one. Busy, hectic, fast, impulsive, charming & curious about everything and everyone. Sometimes people judge them for their impatience & or stuff they’re learning or skills they may have or trying to build. Whatever the case - it can be bothersome at times but they’re quite motivated person when it comes to studying something. And when I say to you that they love to learn - THEY L O V E to learn. Really. It’s something that makes them proud and gives them confidence. They’re quick learners too. I’m also getting a message that they can work as a teachers or coaches. They may also have their own courses about spirituality/practice/religion they’re passionate about. Hard-working, carry a lot on their plate but don’t show their weaknesses. If it’s hard - they may share their burdens but still solve them all on their own. 

Love letter: “I’m sorry for rambling about my passions but I really appreciate how you listen to me with genuine interest in your eyes. You support me no matter what and I’m so grateful to have you on my side. I promise that I’ll show you as much support as you’re giving me even though it’s not something that you care about. And don’t lie to me - I know how girls go and learn football in order to be closer to someone they like. It’s charming and a very nice thing to do so but still. I’m surprised every time when I talk and you listen with an actual purpose of listening to me. No one has a ever done this to me. But you did and still do. I promise that I’ll be as supportive as you are. I love you. Thank you for being my fan number one.”

Pile 3

Oracle: Highly intuitive person, care about their family & house situation. Also about their image, first impression and body. Stellium or major placements in the 1st, 3rd and 7th Houses. Cancer Sun/Moon/Rising. May have spiritual gifts - they can be a tarot reader or practioner. Was born on the day of Solar Eclipse. Vivid and prophetic dreams, lucid dreaming, sensitive & empathic. Can recognize & interpret signs in their dreams very well. Their soul’s purpose is to uplift humanity and raise the vibration of the planet. Could have a spiritual account/or work as a spiritual advisor. Have a quite mysterious aura that is hard to deny when you look at them for a first time. Do not like to overshare things with others. Past life in Egypt or another ancient civilization.

Angel numbers: 37(37), 41(41), 12(12), 52(52), 44(44), 50(50), 16(16), 25(25), 46(46), 27(27), 31(31)

Tarot: I would say that they’re very calm & balanced person. It’s hard for someone to make them angry or mad. Their presence is really nurturing, you just feel so nice and understoon when you’re around them. They don’t like to judge others or participate in gossips. They like to help others when they especially need it and I’m also getting a vision that a lot of people come to them for an advice. Very mature, very stable and secure as well. Sometimes they get confused about world around them and feel like won’t be able to leave their mark on our planet. This is something that they care and stress about a lot because their desire to help others can have a quite large scale. On another side of this problem they shyness and thoughts that they aren’t qualified enough to make a difference. (Spoiler: it’s not true) What is interesting about this person being such a balanced and overall nice: they absolutely hate it when someone judge others for their passions and likes. They instantly move into a protective mode and participate in these conflicts because they can’t stand it. Like pretty bad. Your soulmate may suffer from inner conflicts as well. I’m getting that it was some sort of the trauma for them - for some reason, in the past they couldn’t express themselves the way they wanted. They felt ashamed doing something they loved and maybe were bullied because of that. But this past made them a really strong and confident person. They do not feel ashamed of themselves anymore and quite corageous to explore any area of their interests. They’re definitely a leader and inspiration to others as well because it seems that only a close part of their circle know about that. And the fact that your person survived from something like that makes them really respectable and loved. Plus, I feel like your soulmate also likes to participate in some sort of the charity. They may work or volunteer in charity organisations, donate to them (personally or through some price percent of their own services that they donate after).

Love letter: “Do you feel as though our meeting is not a coincidence? Me too. It’s like meeting someone who you knew for your whole life despite the fact that I’ve never seen you or talked with you before. My soul recognized you instantly - something about you made me never forget you after we’ve met for the first time. Will you count out the time that is left for us or would you look forward for the time that is awaiting us in the next life? Whatever the reason Universe had to bring us together - I’m grateful and happy to be with you. As a lesson. As an experience. As a lover. As a friend. Because my soul will recognize you anywhere and still would want to be with you. It still will search for you whenever you are in order to spend time together as much as we can. I love you. And it’s such a selfish thing of me to say but I don’t want leave your side. Will you let me?”

Pile 4

Oracle: Natural healer and highly intuitive person. Aquarius, Sagittarius  Sun/Moon/Rising. Incorporates spirituality in their daily life (meditation, journaling, shadow work and etc.) May work as a doctor. Emphatic, knows their way with romantic partners. Dreamer, great manifestor, embody their beauty and worth. Sometimes things just happen to them and everybody is wondering how is that even possible. Quite hard to understand them because they don’t like to overshare things or talk about their feelings. Tend to be idealistic about the world and people around them and can get really hurt when something happens to their ‘ideal’ image. Friendly, kind, likes to help and take care of others more than let others do the same. Despite being quite talkative & chatty, enjoy the silence and solitude with their whole heart. Likes to spend their time near water bodies and with the nature. Great with technology & sacred knowledge. An old soul, might receive information in the very odd and unsual ways.  

Angel numbers: 46(46), 12(12), 4(4(4(4)))), 21(21), 24(24), 40(40), 23(23), 30(30), 8(8(8(8)))).

Tarot: They have a really big heart. They care about global matters and it’s quite heartbreaking for them when they see violence, war or other problems that someone may face, while leaving in another continent. I’m also getting a message that they had a pretty rough past. Their parents may have been cold and distant and this is why it’s hard for them to deal with their own emotions. To express them healthily or honest with others. But despite all of that, they have no problem indetifying emotions of other people and feel them as if these feelings are their own. Very unique and very special person - when you meet them, you just can’t move away your gaze from them. They stand out so much that it’s very hard for people to not notice them. They do not judge others and are very open-minded person, curious and always ready to explore and experience something new. They’re very proud of their achievements and skills. They’re quite confident in them too even tho reaching some level of qualification can be pretty boring for them. They do not shy away from their responsibilities and are very hard-working. This is why their manifestation are pretty successfull. They just talk about their intention, let go of it and start working - they’re always ready to take a leap of faith and make first steps towards something they want. Because they understand that no matter what - they’re supported and guided. Even though they didn’t felt and thought like that before at all. Back then, they thought of themeselves as a victim of this big and unfair world. But not anymore. 

Love letter: “I wouldn’t even imagine that the day when I’ve met my second half will come but it did. I’ve never trusted anyone as much as I trust you, because no matter how understanding and friendly someone may look, there’s always something that they’ll never accept and never forgive. But with you I can be completely honest and myself. Sometimes I think that there’s no way you would approve this part of myself but you do. Every single time. And this is such a nice feeling - to talk without ‘inner’ filter and any fears of judgement from the person you love. You’re truly a miracle. I cannot express how grateful I am to have someone like you in my life. And I promise you - I will accept, support and love all parts that are you. No matter how ugly, bad and sinful they may look to you. Your trust in me is something that I’ll never forget. So I hope that you’ll share with me everything that you’re scared to talk about even within your own self.”

#free readings #free tarot reading #free oracle card reading #free oracle readings #free pick a card #pick a card #pick a card reading #free pick a card readings #tarot #tarot readings #tarot reading #oracles #oracle reading #oracles readings #oracle readings #soulmate reading

[anna-scribbles]

an announcement

hey everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that my tumblr and instagram accounts will be inactive until further notice. more information under the cut, but long story short: I have had an incredibly fun and positive time sharing my art with you all over the last year or so. however, I’ve noticed myself making my internet presence way too much of a priority in my life, and it’s become unhealthy for my relationships and my faith. I’ve decided to take a step back. if I ever feel like it’s a healthy choice for me to come back to these accounts, then I’d love to--but right now it’s not. thank you for understanding.

if anyone needs to contact me, I’ll still be available on discord or through my email [email protected]. my accounts will not be deactivated, all my content will stay up, I just will not be active here anymore.

(head’s up: I’ll be talking about my Christian faith in the explanation)

About six months ago, I was facing a really big life decision and one of the big questions I had was what my art was supposed to be for. Before I began posting my art online a little over a year ago, I never thought much of it; I drew characters that I liked because it made me feel happy. But after the pandemic hit and quarantine began, I felt bored and sad and I decided to finally make a tumblr account and post some pictures on it. About a week after I made the account, I drew a comic that was a crossover between steven universe and gravity falls, and it blew up. I started getting thousands of followers every day, and I’d never had followers on anything before in my life, and it was exciting, and I didn’t want it to stop. I did feel God impressing on my heart back then that I needed to ask Him for permission to do this, but I was so worried of losing the momentum of my rapid following that I ignored Him.

Since that week, my follower base has grown to 17k on tumblr and 20k on instagram. To be honest, I think about it all the time. All my free time is spent creating content, or consuming content, or obsessively looking through the reactions to the content I produce. All this to say, the events of the last year have caused me to see my art differently, to believe that it was good. Not because of what God says about me, but because of what strangers on the internet did. And this newfound belief in my artistic skill caused me a newfound source of pain and confusion: I became worried that I was wasting it. I was worried that I should’ve gone to a better school, should be practicing more, should be more focused on how to get a career in the industry. And six months ago, when I was faced with a big life decision, I asked God what my art was for. I wanted Him to give me a career path, a degree. But that’s not what He told me.

I was reading in the book of Lamentations that day, and it struck me that it was a book of poetry. It was gorgeously intricate and structured and beautiful, and it was art. It was art that wasn’t for anyone but God, not intended for anything but the act of offering up a prayer and a praise to Him. And God revealed to me in that moment that He didn’t give me art so that I could pursue a certain career path or degree; He gave me art so that I could give it back to Him. So that I could worship. This revelation filled me with a joy I haven’t often felt--one that brought my heart back to life and filled my mouth with praise. God spoke to me in that moment, asked me to give my art back to Him in worship, and then... I let the moment pass. I chose to ignore Him, again. I was still too afraid of losing it all, this little kingdom on earth I’d built.

A few weeks ago I was at church and the Lord impressed upon me, again, that it was time to give it up. I knew that God told me to give my art back to Him in worship, and I knew I had ignored Him, and I felt His Spirit imploring me strongly again to give it up. And still, I was afraid to walk away. I liked how it felt, receiving dozens of nice comments every day. I liked watching the numbers go up, watching my skills as an artist improve and gain recognition. I liked feeling like I made people laugh or smile or have a better day. I told myself that it was harmless, good even. (But, as it turns out, God has a reason for the things that He asks of us. As it turns out, God sees the whole picture while we live our lives grasping at a single piece of the puzzle. As it turns out, it is often the most mundane of things that can separate us from God.)

Recently, someone very close to me told me she’s been feeling distant from me for the past year, that I’ve shown so little interest in her life that it’s gotten to the point where she’s been anxious to even talk to me. This is something I admit with the heaviest heart. I’ve been so focused on building myself up that I’ve been neglecting the people God’s put in my life. I’ve been centering my life on something that’s not Him, and when I do that--no matter what it is that I’m centering my life on-- it hurts me and it hurts those who are around me. God has sent me a wake-up call and He is asking me to obey, and this time I am saying yes.

If you have ever enjoyed my account or anything I’ve had to say, this is the only thing I can tell you that has any real significance: God knows you and loves you and wants to have a relationship with you. I say this not because it’s what I’ve been taught, but because it’s my actual lived experience. I wouldn't be doing this if He hadn't asked me to, and if He hadn't proven to me that I can trust Him to take care of me through it.

Thank you so much to everyone who has been so kind to me. I’ve made so many friends through this experience and felt so inspired and happy and loved here. From the bottom of my heart, I’m so thankful for your endless kind and encouraging words. The last year and a half have by far been the hardest of my life but this community has brought me happiness through that. I know, though, that it’s time for me to give it up for now and focus on what God has for me. Thank you for reading and understanding.

So much love,

Anna

#i'll try to answer any questions/concerns in the comments #just know that my experience on here has been so absolutely lovely. I am so grateful #and if I ever feel led to start sharing my art again either here or in a different way I will let you all know #it's very hard to let go of this but it's also very much the right thing for me right now #thank you so so much for all of it #<333333333

[felassan]

Highlights and insights from the N7 Day cast & crew reunion panel

[Rewatch link]

In case a text format is better for anyone. There are some NSFW references. Cut for length.

(Some paraphrasing.)

“Some of us are inebriated”

“Patrick Weekes, the killer of man and beasts, the breaker of hearts”

JHale put the whole thing together, it’s the biggest ME cast reunion to date

The cast had no idea that the remaster was a thing

Lots of ace discussion about what the magic of the MET is (“it captured lightning in a bottle”)

Lots of warm fuzzies between the cast, crew and community, and lots of fun behind-the-scenes anecdotes

Lots of great discussion on the diversity and inclusion in ME: on gender, sexuality, representation, empowerment, the core message in the MET that “we’re all in this together or we’re screwed”, the progress made in the portrayal of female characters in gaming, etc. “Everything behind what went into these characters was authentic, we [the VAs] could tell that so much research, texture, authenticity etc had gone into them. It really made a difference”. JHale: “I’ve spent my career kicking down ceilings [barriers and so on women actors experience] with my steel-toed boot. To get to be a part of this game that has now created the expectation that there now be a female PC, ‘duh’, is once of the great things of my life. BioWare listened and put her on the box. The first time someone dropped the box in front of me I held it over my head and screamed over the crowd, ‘Casey Hudson, thank youuu!!’ It was a divine moment. This game was the moment the boot finally crashed through the glass, pushed by millions of women.”

The panel received many messages from the question submission from fans expressing that MET really helped them through very dark places and periods in their lives. The cast have had a lot of interactions with fans over the years where the fans expressed similar sentiments to them

ME was one of the first games Keythe Farley (Thane) acted for that had branching dialogue/dialogue choices, and when he saw the script with that when he went in, he was like “wow”. ME was the second big game D. C. Douglas (Legion) ever did. In his first audition he didn’t know it was for a robot-type character as it was disguised as something else with a military-feel. The second time it was to do a speech/lament at someone’s funeral and he knew it was for a robot. He said playing Legion for him was a case of “wake up, drink some coffee and go to work”

Jack was really special to her VA Courtenay Taylor because she relates to her so much and had a lot of similar emotional problems and personal troubles in her past. Jack helped her become who she has became. The host added that in his interactions with Courtenay over the years, he realized very quickly that she is very much like Jack

AWR has two moms, something which she hasn’t talked about/expressly said publicly before. Talking about recording lines between Sam and Femshep made her tear up. She said that being raised by two moms in the 80s was tough due to societal attitudes at the time, and so to see a loving relationship between two women depicted in a game was a big deal for her. When recording the white picket fence conversation, she was actually crying (“and then I’m crying because of the lesbians”). It was a huge moment for her to represent her moms’ journey. When she went home she told them all about how her character is gay and wants a white picket fence and everything “just like we had”.

When PW was working on Sam’s arc, one of the things they did was show it to one of their colleagues, who is a lesbian, asking what things she’d like to see in an arc like that and what things she felt were missing from it. The white picket fence conversation came from the colleague’s feedback (“we wanna see the nice, healthy, happy domestic stuff”, as it’s often missing in portrayals of wlw relationships)

As the VAs got more into their characters, they sometimes had feedback and input to the process to offer, like “I don’t think she’d say [this] like [that]”. Sometimes they knew their characters even better than the crew did sometimes. JHale waxed lyrical about Caroline Livingstone’s awesome direction, with the host adding that he has interviewed a lot of the VAs over the years and they all talk about Caroline like she’s Gandalf the White coming to the rescue in LotR. AWR expressed that Caroline is really funny (“don’t worry it’s not you, PW was sick when they wrote this line that’s why”) and emotionally in-tune with them and this makes long hard sessions with her a joy

When Mark went into record for the Citadel DLC one day he asked Caroline “wouldn’t be great if Shepard’s clone had been made to be the opposite gender? Then the two Shepards could fight each other!”

William Salyers (Mordin) likes the way Mordin’s story ended and felt that it was wonderful to be able to play that. He feels like the luckiest person because as he wasn’t the original VA of Mordin, he got to come in late to something that was amazing. “Caroline helped me get to where I needed to be emotionally to play that final scene. It was one of the most moving things I’ve ever gotten to do personally for a piece of interactive art”. PW related that with Mordin’s writing, they didn’t realize how much they were asking for. They thought William was amazing doing all the science-speak/technobabble, as they themselves didn’t know what it meant, and then suddenly having to deliver emotional heartbreaking lines. William’s always been a secret science nerd and so he loved that fact about Mordin. “It was a real treat to say your words”

Karin: “I always claim credit for the Scientist Salarian song even though I had nothing to do with it. I opened that door for PW”

Steve Blum (Grunt) found it a real treat playing Grunt as Grunt is a tough soldier on the outside but a [babey] on the inside, while he is more the other way around (softer on the outside, fight-y inside). He isn’t a gamer and so didn’t know what to expect or what he was getting into. There was the big pile of words, they showed him the picture of Grunt, and he just ran with it. “Grunt was kind of a perfect character for me in that respect”. Side note: his wry comments throughout the panel were hilarious

“Casey Hudson, our glorious loving overlord”

Courtenay jokes about “interspecies snorkeling”

The women Courtenay met working on this game are her friends for life. Ali Hillis (Liara) gave her her number the night of the ME3 drop and was like “let’s hang out!!” “JHale is the shit. I go to England and there’s AWR and I have this friend for life”.

“We’re a family”. The host comments that you don’t see this kind of closeness between the people on a lot of projects

Kimberley Brooks (Ashley) thinks things have and are changing for the better in terms of roles for women, and roles for brown and black women. This year she has noticed increasing awareness of inclusion and of where it’s lacking. “The copies I’m being sent for auditions, it’s drastically changing, I’m seeing it change before my eyes. It’s really exciting, there’s more and more roles for me.” “Ash is such a strong character and I felt very badass playing her, it was life-changing”. She’s excited that the remaster is going to be a new way to see these characters that they’ve been so lucky to voice. Kimberley/Ash was the first female character Karin saw in the studio, when she saw her she was like “Wow, she’s so kickass and inspiring”. At this point Karin hadn’t been working at BioWare for all that long, and she wanted to thank Kimberley, because she saw her and heard her voice and had a personal ‘this changes everything’ moment

Raphael Sbarge (Kaidan) finds it very moving how many women were encouraged into gaming due to ME

Raphael: “Everyone here has awesome varied careers, but because ME was so collaborative [and so on], [it was something really rare and special]. Nothing else I’ve done has been so important or impassioned, it has almost a religious experience to it, which you can see from tears in fans’ eyes and tattoos and people talking about it 10 years later”. “I’m so grateful for it.” “Clearly we’re going to do this again next year! :D” D. C. added that it’s going to follow him for the rest of his career. Courtenay says it has catapulted her career

PW talked about how it’s great that the female chars in ME were allowed to have real, realistic flaws and dark periods (as opposed to nonsense stuff like ‘her flaw is that she’s clumsy’)

Having the male and female PC be voiced was a big, expensive commitment for the studio. Karin commented that at the time, it was a risk that the pretty-much almost entirely-male leadership of BioWare at the time decided was important to take, and so she was happy that these were the values her colleagues had

PW was “the junior baby writer on ME1. I’d just gotten to the studio and Mac Walters fell down a flight of stairs and hurt his back, and they pulled me in while he was healing”. Karin: “Mac was very understanding when PW fell on the ice and hurt themselves during ME2.” PW: “My job in ME1 was to come up with conversations between followers to pass the time in the elevator loading times. I was throwing stuff at the wall to see what would stick”

Steve turning his volume down before he shouts classic Grunt quotes down the mic

Caroline: “Do you know how many tears were shed in the booth? How many times have we all cried in the booth...” JHale: “We were recording the end of ME3, which I never call the end, because I’m always like I’M HERE! [wink] The goodbye Garrus lines” - these lines got right under her skin and when she went to say her lines she couldn’t speak because she’d burst into tears. “It was all I could do to say those words... and then there was silence... [and Caroline had gotten choked up too].” This was one of the last sessions they did. PW: “John Dombrow wrote Garrus in ME3 and I’m gonna tell him that he got you both to break.”

Caroline was also really teary during Keith David’s (Anderson)’s performance where he tells Shepard she’s like his daughter. This moment was one of JHale’s favorites to act

BioWare came up with a proprietary VA recording system which JHale describes as a secret sauce as-yet not widely-used in the industry

Lots of fun in the line-reading portion at the end. The lines/scenes were sent in by fans. This starts around timestamp 1 hour 50 mins. There’s a break where they discuss more anecdotes after a bit then some line-reading resumes at 1 hour 59 mins 18 secs

"Salarian Vorcha Conrad Verner simmering sexual tension scene”

One of PW’s fondest memories is of ME3 when JHale and Mark got to play off each other (which they naturally didn’t get to do very much), when PW had shoved the entire script of the Blasto movie into random ambience throughout the Citadel. They knew Mark was going to be Blasto as he voiced most of the hanar. PW: “We had to have Blasto’s elcor partner’s hot sister... And I was like could it be JHale?? Because they hardly ever get to talk to each other. It was one of my proudest moments”. Mark: “Not only that, we had a romance.” JHale: “Yeah, it was hot”.

“Think of the poor cold freezing Edmontonian hanar”

PW’s story about Sam’s toothbrush: They wrote it as a throwaway line but AWR did it so well that PW wanted to bring it back in the Citadel DLC, as that DLC was the action-comedy one. So they decided the toothbrush was going to save the Normandy. The art director at the time was in an early playthrough of the scene and in that version of the scene Sam held up her empty hand. The director was like “We gotta make the toothbrush? Really? It’s gonna be thousands of dollars to render the toothbrush.” It then got to the next few lines and the director deadpanned at PW “Okay that’s pretty good, we’ll make the toothbrush.” PW: “Good, I got my toothbrush.”

It was John’s idea that we find out that Mordin had been working on a crime noir novel. There was a period in the development of the Citadel DLC where PW was feeling like “Mordin’s gone, he had his big moment, I want to respect and honor that” and the entire team were like “I think Mordin needs a couple more songs dude”. “Well alright!” By that point William had shown them he could deliver literally any line

“Oh I need a shower that was so steamy hot”

PW got in trouble with Localization over Jack’s “Save some of your energy, we’re gonna do it on the pool table” exchange. Localization were like “Um could you explain what Jack means by this??” These lines were PW’s, Karin as an editor got the question about it and passed it on to PW like “nope this is your fault”. “The best part is it was France that needed PW to explain the joke while apparently Germany were like ‘Yes please confirm that this is regarding the possibility of oral sex-’”

Keythe on voicing Thane: “Thane was a real lesson in opening up to the character, allowing this beautifully conflicted character to exist. Each character in the MET has conflicts within themselves and a tragic flaw that is revealed through the course of conflict.” He also waxed lyrical about how the MET was akin to Star Wars and Citizen Kane, and about the interconnectedness and representation in it

D. C.: “I have a question for you guys. Was it a conscious decision to not have Legion as a romance? Because there are a lot of upset people out there!!” “Voltage problems.” “A lot of creative reuses of ‘There was a hole.’” PW: “It was a process of us figuring out what we wanted to do. If we had known... The number of people who were like ‘I don’t know, are people gonna wanna romance Garrus? Liara? She’s blue and has no hair. Are people gonna be okay with that?” Karin: “We were young and naïve, now we know BioWare fans are thirsty.”

Derek brought in the first picture of Thane to show Caroline and she was like “He’s really hot, that’s gonna be a killer character. People are gonna want to romance that gentleman”

Raphael asked the BioWare team if there’s ever been a point where they thought about doing more DLC content or some kind of revival. “Has that ever come up?” “We’re legally obligated not to say, sorry, we’re going through a tunnel right now, bad reception!!”

D. C.: “Does this country have a soul?” “It does.”

“An N7 Day to remember! Go forth and heal.”

#bioware #mass effect #video games #lgbtq #feels #lul #garrus vakarian #best boy #please remember if you are a minor you should not be following me #a minor = under 18 #next mass effect

[bookwyrminspiration]

WAIT. I'm late to the party but I just remembered all those anons were sending in "why I send you asks" and their reasons and I actually really want to participate, so I hope you will accept late applications?

The reason I send you so many asks is because you've just...built such a nice feeling that anything can be discussed, and it's never too niche or cringy or boring, and that's really relieving and amazing.

I'm sure you (along with many others) have realized by now, but I suffer from....really bad anxiety, both social anxiety and just in general, and it very often gets in the way of my life. Because of this and past experiences, I'm always very scared and hesitant to talk about my interests and my thoughts on anything.

But every time I've sent you an ask, even if it was, in retrospect, probably really annoying to read through the one hundred "sorry"s and "my bad"s, you've always been nothing but kind and interested in my ideas, and that was just...so surprising. Because I never really knew anyone who was willing to talk about anything, and it was just...really amazing to meet someone who was! Especially because I love and am interested in so many different things and kind of need someone to bounce ideas at. And it was really cool to see someone that was unashamed of their own interests and thoughts, but didn't make others feel bad for having different ideas.

Every time I send you an ask, you always have something interesting to say back. Something I hadn't thought of or considered, or a query that would make me rethink my own theories, or just a very well-thought-out answer to a question. I remember sending in tons of asks about the wings AU before it was released, and writing those was probably the highlight of my day, because I knew you'd take them and run with the ideas, and do your best to match my energy, and I was really grateful for that. And you were always willing to dig deeper, to think "but what if there was more?" and that's just...incredible! I don't have any other word for it!

I love sending you asks because you don't dismiss an idea or deem it as stupid, and you're just...such a kind and wonderful person that can make even the most obscure subject infinitely more interesting than before, and you never fail to make me consider things again, to expand my thoughts and views, and I'm really grateful for that.

So, because it should definitely be said by now, thank you!

And, well, that's why I love sending you asks :]

- pyro

there is no timeline so there's no way to be late! and I'm answering this a few days after you sent this, so if you believe yourself to be late then we can both be late together :D. you are fully welcome to participate if you want to (which you said you did)! it was mostly just a random question I had because i'm just as analytical with myself as I am with keeper, and knowing how other perceive and think of me is helpful for that--and I was curious about how i'd aquired so many asks so quickly, and then you all just turned it into complimenting quil hours for some reason !! (but on to your ask before I get even more distracted)

(note from a quil who has answered all of this: got very long so that's why there's a readmore! i love you /p)

this means so much to me--specifically your use of "built" because I do try pretty hard to maintain a positive atmosphere and welcome everyone in and treat everyone with the same attention. it didn't just fall into place, i try to be encouraging to everyone and support all the amazing work--art, writing, ideas, etc--I see from people. (note: i've been wanting to do a thing where I ask for fic/art/other recommendations from others (can be friends or their own) so i can go through and reblog a bunch of them with comments and the like, I just want to get through more of my asks before I start something like that). But you're right--nothing is too niche! there's so many details in the story it's impossible for one person to notice anything, so people bringing up the obscure and their own thoughts makes the story richer and more fleshed out for everyone else! and i think it's really cool to just see what other people focus on (like I said, my analysis isn't limited to characters, but I'm not like dissecting you all to understand each of you in a creepy way or anything. I just like to get a better sense of someone so I can respond in a way more tailored to them when we interact)

anxiety can really suck, so as someone who also has anxiety i am giving you a comforting hug if you'd like one. it genuinely impacts everything you do and think about, rewriting how you experience life. a single, inconsequential experience to someone else can literally change major aspects of how we think, which makes interactions so scary sometimes. i remember things people said years ago and still base my actions around them, but those people have absolutely no recollection of ever saying it, but just the fear of having done something wrong once permanently altered my thinking. (this is not to make this about me, I'm just trying to show I understand by sharing an experience of my own).

reading through all your "i'm sorry"s and "my bad"s wasn't annoying and never will be. you have never had anything to apologize for, and I know that sometimes you feel you need to enter a conversation and first apologize for being there, but I'm thrilled to have you here and always love seeing you in my inbox. I don't know how to articulate this properly, but I'm going to try. i saw your apologies and your apprehension as...a puzzle? that's absolutely not the right word but I can't think of the right one so please let me explain (I don't mean to imply you're like something to be solved or a problem in any way. words can be difficult and I'm trying to describe something very intangible rn, so I hope this doesn't sound bad). I didn't see it as annoying (you're never annoying), I saw it like it was something to work through, and while it's not my job or anything to help other's with their personal problems, it was like if I could just provide one space where I could encourage you (not just you, but anyone) as a friend to try shifting your language and start thinking of yourself more positively, then I wanted to give that.

because I am interested in your ideas! and I want to be kind and welcoming to you! but I also want you to be kind to yourself, so any impact I've had to give anyone a safer, less scary space is really cool. I don't know if that made sense, but I'm not trying to talk down to you or anything or be like I'm this high and mighty figure harboring lost souls or something, just that connection is important and I like being there for people. kinda worried that sounded bad because it feels worded strange but I'm trying to reciprocate and say i appreciate you and am happy to talk about anything!

i love bouncing ideas back and forth and you are more than welcome to say anything and everything you're thinking about. talking to you is always an absolutely joy and I get so excited when you send me an ask and when you're reading my response, because it often feels like this like...buzz? like we're just vibing on this frequency and it makes it so much fun to throw ideas back and forth and just listen to each other talk. i am very glad to have surprised you and met you! I don't know a lot of people like myself either, so having someone like you interact with me and just go all out on these little things and what we personally like about different parts of the so much fun. a lot of the other people I know irl feel like they just scratch the surface, they say things just to get credit for it and to appear like they know what they're talking about while ignoring all these other things that have such an impact, so it's amazing to have found someone else who looks at everything and anything like I do. my brain really is "a little bit of everything all of the time" so knowing you have so many different interests too is really cool. i am giving you an internet high five and pretending you aren't so far away.

I spent so much of my life being quiet when I had so many thoughts, so now that I have this kind of outlet I just! want to say everything I can! i want to look at everything from every perspective possible! the world is a huge collection of things tied together and I love following the strings to find the connected pieces! but I think that's a way of approaching the world not a lot of people share (I could be wrong), so it's really cool to hear you think my thought process is interesting!! my brain is practically composed entirely of questions. any subject at any time of the day and nearly all of my thoughts are just wanting to know more and trying to understand things, so having that opportunity to ask further questions and just learn things (about what other's thing, how things work, etc) is so much fun. you might've seen me ask some questions of other's in a few of the asks I answer, but those barely scratch the surface of just how many I have. my handle is in_quil_sitive (inquisitve) on nearly every social media platform (except for this one) for a reason.

I remember some of your asks from before the wings au was published, too. those were absolutely incredible, and I got a rush of excitement every time I saw you sent another. those were the the highlight of my week, too!! your enthusiasm and excitement for something I hadn't even posted yet gave me so much motivation to continue and you helped me think through so many future ideas and consider things from new perspectives. i know i specifically wrote that you inspired one chapter in the notes, but you've had an impact on every single chapter of this story/ it wouldn't be what it is without you, and I mean that with complete sincerity. you were the one who made me think "what if there was more" so I could make this au even better and work towards something bigger. I just have so many thoughts about everything all of the time, I can't go more than a few minutes without being distracted by a different train of thought, but knowing there was someone who would want to hear all the weird, disjointed ideas i'd strung together and composed into a more cohesive format was so cool. there's just so much to think about!!

I probably sound repetitive at this point but I love answering your asks because you're so receptive to the way i say things and it's like you're actually listening and want to hear what I specifically have to say, not just the general ideas. you want to know my unique, personalized opinions and perspectives and don't just dismiss them when they're not what you expect to hear or aren't generic. you're incredibly kind, too, I hope you know. I love the description of how I can "make even the most obscure subject infinitely more interesting than before." that is such a meaningful compliment to me. I just keep thinking about this line over and over again and it just...it really means a lot. because you're saying it's me that interests you and not just what I talk about. I could talk about anything and you'd still want to interact with me and that's so fucking nice. I hope you know the same goes for you. we can challenge each other's thinking together and make things even deeper and more complex before together <33.

thank you for being here and being my friend, pyro. talking to you is always one of the highlights of my day and gives me a very positive feeling that I carry around for a while. I do this thing sometimes where I film myself to later observe my behaviors in the middle of intense emotions to understand myself better (back to that whole analysis thing again), but it's not just negative things, it's also when I'm really excited or pleased with something and jumping around and stimming and all that, and some of those are from when I interact with you. that might sound a little weird but I mean it positively, as in talking with you makes me ecstatic.

I have said. so many things. so I will stop (for now). but I really appreciate having you in my life <33

#this response is 1757 words long i-- #i have written shorter essays for my college classes #pyro this better convince you that i care about you #you're one of my favorite people #just in general #i really value our friendship #and hope none of this sounded weird #i tried to articulate it but some of the concepts didn't want to become words #so please know this is meant to be loving and supportive of you #in all aspects #i wrote so much and still didn't say everything I wanted to #you should be asleep when I answer this so hopefully this is something nice to wake up to #still don't feel i've articulated myself fully #but I have tried #worried about that puzzle part but I'm trying to say I want this to be like a safe space of kinds #where I can support you and encourage you to stop apologizing when you don't need to #and do that without judging you #ah anxious about that #if you cannot tell I don't want to mess this up and am worried I will #hnnnng #if I said something weird please let me know so i can fix it #quil's queries #pyrokinetic-loser #nonsie love #long post

[morkofday]

Now that this hell year is almost over let’s celebrate the good things! If you’re receiving this it means you have made someone’s year better. Tell who on tumblr has made this year better for you (as many people as you like, it can be something as small as liking your posts or sending something sweet) and share some of the content you’ve enjoyed (your own or others)

thank you so much dear anon! ♥ I am happy to know that I’ve managed to make someone’s year at least a tiny bit better :’) as a year on tumblr, this year has been very special to me personally so am happy to know that someone has felt that too!

this is going to be a huge list so be warned! putting it under the cut bc of that~

@i-am-just-a-kiddo you are and will always be on this list first and foremost. you and our friendship is the best thing I have gotten from this hellsite and I continue being thankful for it ♥ I always have so much fun talking to you, you support me so unconditionally, share things with me and allow me to just yell about things every day! you never get bored of that endless stream of random nonsense I pour on you and it means so much to me ♥ I also feel honored to share your things, to see your paintings and read your writings and just be there for you. let’s hope the next year will be kinder to us and the world in general! and hey, maybe you get into guardian at some point heh (and thank you for getting into so many things with me this year already!)

@leonzhng I think I said this at some point too but you were the reason why I got into this community we have going on with @mdzsnet and gave me the confidence to just approach ppl here and love things together ♥ you are always so sweet and kind and lovable and I appreciate you doing all the things you do. your edits are amazing and inspirational and I love all the tag games we keep throwing around :’D 

@ashenwren you!! you are amazing and I’m so happy to have gotten to know you through our network :’) I am excited every day when I get to talk to you, even if it’s just for a moment as our timezones make everything kind of difficult :’D it’s just so nice to share mdzs and dmbj with you, to help you get into these dramas, to share all these ideas and thoughts we have, to share our different cultures and languages and whatnot. you are always so supportive and excited and kind and I wish I could hug you sometimes! I hope I still can write something more for pingxie and that I get to see a ton of your art! ♥

then to all the wonderful ppl in our network who have made my tumblr experience so wonderful this year, who keep being kind and amazing and full of so much talent! to @manhasetardis @aheartfullofjolllly @bees0are0awesome @highwarlockkareena @yibobibo @linglynz @yiqiie @wangxiians @leoyunxi @tiesanjiao @lan-xichens @oneautumnfox @aowyn @wangxianbunnydoodles @weiwuxcian and many others who I might have forgotten: I enjoy seeing you in my notes so much, I enjoy all of your content, seeing us all interact with each other and just being very friendly and welcoming ♥ I am thankful every day that I got to join this network and learn to know so many! continue being awesome and have a nice upcoming year :’)

then quickly to:

@lzswy thank you for loving my music and wanting to know me! I hope we get to talk some more and feel free to push music my way too, am always ready to drown in songs :’)

@kholran thank you for doing my tag games and allowing me to talk to you, to call you my friend, and share my love for liu sang! I will once again tell you that your fic (link here if anyone reading this is interested) was amazing and I hope we get to talk some more! 

and then thank you to all the ppl who I see in my notes all the time and leave amazing tags and just love me with interacting with my content and sometimes making it more known and just giving it their all: @btssjamss @a-force-dyad-in-space @cuppyhands @mylastbraincql @drwcn @fytheuntamed @distantsnows @brutalbeetle @intimisky @kazaore @inessencedevided @bluebelle88 @actualmichelle @sassyassassy @thebeautifulmacabre @merinnan @inkblue-black and many others who I might not recognize or remember or find right now! or who I have already mentioned in the network part bc you guys are awesome like that :’) especially when I have tried out new things this year and have dipped into new fandoms and reached out of this mdzs pit I am still in and unwilling to leave ♥ but you are still there and like my content haha

and then I want to mention some of my favorite works this year (I’ll try to pick one per month from my archives oh boy): 

@i-am-just-a-kiddo‘s amazing niemo fic that owns my heart, soul, and the never to be born firstborn ♥ 

@bloody-bee-tea‘s amazing mdzs related fics that always just make my heart clench but also bring me so much joy!

this amazing wangxian edit that still shatters me

this amazing wwx edit by hanyi ♥ @leonzhng I love the quote in this and this breaks me in all the best ways!

@fytheuntamed‘s whole the untamed memes series that single-handedly has saved this year for me (tho I suppose this started earlier than this year but who cares, quality content either way)

this jc outfits collection post by @linglynz ♥ everything for my am-a-hoe-for-the-angry-purple-guy -needs

this amazing art by @/hana-tox that still gives me so many feels that I feel like bursting 

this stunning edit set for the best album that dropped this year, map of the soul: 7, by @/kassareo

this wangxian edit that inspired me a lot and still makes me catch my breath bc damn that looks gorgeous (by @/itsazbitch)

another very inspirational edit set by @/sammyholdsacandle (some might recognize which one of my edits got inspired by this a lot lol) 

this very beautiful post by @alienwlw that’s really just goals tbh 

@sarawatsaraleo‘s favorite the untamed scenes series, every one of these edits is a huge joy and so beautifully done! ♥

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful, wonderful wangxian edit that keeps being my one of my favorites ever and just. inspires me to this day, I hope one day I can gif :’D ♥

another one of my absolute favorites is this edit by hanyi again ♥ you just have the best ideas and you make everything so pretty!

this soft but heartbreaking, delicate but so emotional edit by @gusucloud ♥ I think I’ve never loved an edit this much, it’s so pretty and absolutely perfect!

this edit by @highwarlockkareena bc wth, the coloring? the gifs themselves?? gosh it looks so pretty and I might cry

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful gifset made for the gif challenge that was going around during this time ;; as I was slowly falling in love with the iron triangle and dmbj in general, this felt like a blessing ♥ 

these absolutely stunning pieces of art by @/tiphs 

this absolutely gorgeous post for wwx’s bday by @alienwlw (all of this is just. perfect?? the colors, the gifs, the scenes... everything!)

this gorgeous edit by @distantsnows that makes me smile and cry at the same time ♥

this edit also by @distantsnows that is just. pure perfection?? bc fuck yes, sect leader jaing yanli!! I love you for this one

this edit by @lanzhansmiles bc the colors are just absolutely stunning and I love how they both sit there like that and just? wow 

this edit just makes me feel so many things and just looks so dreamy by @cescedes 

this adorable but also very painful edit by @manhasetardis ♥ I love all about this one :’)

and as a shameless self-promo (bc apparently I haven’t done enough of that lol) I want to mention my wu xie edit which was just so much fun to do and turned out so great and. I just love him a lot ok, he’s a wonderful character and zhu yilong played him so well ♥

I wish you all – all the ppl mentioned here and all who see this and all who still do not – a very merry christmas, happy holidays, and happy new years too! I hope the year 2021 will treat us all well and that you will remain as amazing, lovely, and wonderful as you all have been! ♥ 

#mdzsnet #(am gonna tag that sry) #thank you to all of you!! #and so much love #and i feel like i forgot a ton but #here we go #about me #random

[binaryeclipse]

Hello love 💕

Not sure which of these you’ve already done, but how about 7, 13, 43, and 47?

Hello honey thank you 💋

7. tell us about the plot of the first fanfic you ever wrote

The first ever? Like when I was 12 and knew nothing? t was for the Artemis Fowl fandom 🙈 I think it was probably crackfic poking fun at characters and involved memory loss and--honestly it was probably really offensive and ableist because I was 12 and knew nothing and the internet in 2002 was lawless. And I was grossed out by romance so you know I was making fun of the popular ships.

Children on the internet, everyone!

This is why I don't judge anyone below 18. I just ignore them because they're dumb and they know nothing. I was there.

13. Talk about a writing experience that has pleasantly surprised you?

I enjoy doing secret santas and it surprises me every time because there's so much anxiety and vulnerability writing something for someone and I hate hate hate being vulnerable. But the payoff is so good when you make someone happy. So it's worth it, I think, when it goes well. I've had it not go well before, and yet I keep coming back for that pleasant high when it goes spectacularly right.

43. how did writing change you?

Writing gave me a creative outlet when art lost all its joy for me in high school when I made it my primary focus in IB (and, come to think of it, my ex's constant criticisms of my work ethic and talent probably had an effect on this too that I haven't started to unpack yet even after 13 years 😬).

I won't say writing saved my life but it definitely gave me joy when I thought I would never create again. I was writing before this but not in a way that like... I never identified myself as a writer before that moment. I still saw myself as an artist, doing fanart and things like that. Except I wasn't doing fanart anymore. Art made me want to scream. Art was painful. So when that was taken from me, when I couldn't find the happiness and every time I picked up a pencil I just hated every second of it... I turned to writing. The moment I started to see myself as a writer was the salvation I needed when something I loved died inside me.

47. what story are you most proud of?

Hmmmmmm

On some level I'm proud of all of them. I don't put things I don't enjoy reading on the internet.

Of my completed stories it's probably Light Up The Trenches Where My Heart Lies. It's finished. There's definitely things I would do differently now but I love it for what it is and I'm proud to say I wrote it.

Of the stories I'm currently working on... I have equal amounts of pride in kick at the darkness (until it bleeds daylight), Blueshift and The Knight Errant. They are all very different stories doing different things and I can't choose one over the other.

from this fic ask game

#ask game

[macaronnya]

So I just saw the announcement about the EN server shutting down or at least dicontinued (hopefully just for now) and I might just burst into tears 🥲 I want to put my thoughts or rather feelings of the journy up until now on here to come down but maybe also as some form of comfort for anyone who needs it? It's very long and might have some broken english as it's not my first language so do keep it in mind please 😅

Anyways, I started A3! last year on march 7th because I saw a youtube video of people cosplaying Sakuya and Sakyo. At taht point, I already knew of A3! somewhere in my distant memories back when it was JP only. I decided to try out the game since I was getting bored of my current mobile games and the few reviews I could find of it were relatively positive. I had no idea just what a big part of my life this game was about the become 🤧

Btw I'm listening to some A3! songs right now, specifically Sakuya's 2nd character song, and it's not helping me 😢 So at the time, lockdown just started 2 days ago, which left me with a lot of time playing it and, I kid you not, I gulfed the main story down like it was the last slice of cake at home. I have 2 siblings. I think I finished it in a week or so despite it being only unlockable through leveling up, and if my memory serves me right, you need to be around lvl 75 to unlock all 4 episodes. As one can see, I was VERY invested in the story. It was just so....nice? I don't know how to exactly describe it but I was surprised by how likable everyone was. Of course I didn't hold such strong feelings for everyone back then as I do now but I was intrigued enough back then of nearly everyone, which is kind of rather rare in such types of games, no? At least for me it is, although I haven't played terribly a lot (Love Live, MLQC, Mystic Messenger).

I really like how the story actually continues through the events and how it alternated between stories exploring certain characters more (show events) and stories focusing on just them having fun. Getting to know everyone bit by bit and seeing how everyone grows closer to each other, not only within their respective troupes but the whole theater, makes me really all warm and fuzzy and it's found family, what more could you want?

Also, I really like Izumi, our dear MC 🥰 Even though she's supposed to be our self-insert, I found myself really enjoying reading her thoughts, observing her reactions to other characters' shenanigans (like her 'I do not see' to the members plan of faking their identity to bail Citron out lol) and just....her personality. Trying not to digress here but she has a lot more personality than other MCs in these joseimuke games and it makes her interactions with others not only bearable but even enjoyable. I'm not saying that this is what a perfect MC looks like or that she's superior to bland self-inserts. After all, it depends on the story, gameplay and other things. It's just a nice bonus I'm very grateful for. I mean, I got really emotional when Izumi performed with the other staff members all of the plays the actors have put out so far for the first anniversary. Her realizing she gained a new dream for her lost one just really took my heart, broke it in thousand pieces and then mended it again.

I also love A3! songs ❤ I did wonder how they would work in this franchise since it's not about idols but actors, though I guess there was nothing to worry about. I really like the duets because it's always a different duo and hearing them singing together, harmonizing with each other, complimenting each other, just fills me with undescribable joy. Of course the songs also slap pretty much every time. Even by limiting my options to 1 troupe, I still wouldn't be able to pick only one favourite (I like the majority of Winter's song tho, like Shoutai is just 🤌 and my sibling blasted Unmasked non-stop so I can't get it outta my head anymore). Gosh, I was so excited for 'Double Solitaire' since it would complete trilogy of the Hyodosakas singing together. I was really looking forward to getting all the songs and I was even saving up for Summer Troupe's 6th play.

If I had to describe the game A3! in one word, it'd be "charming". Coming to game itself, there are so many little quirks, that on their own aren't anything groundbreaking or big but together give the game its own flair. Live 2D is pretty common to see nowdays in games because it brings the characters to life through movements like 3D models. But I think A3! is able to illustrate it just as well, if not even better with their 2D sprites. Citron moonwalked by flipping the image over and sliding across the screen, Hisoka appeared out of nowhere by coming from above the screen, they do a little jump when they're happy, they go down a bit when they're sad. And that's just things with their whole sprite. The little drops when Tsuzuru finds himself in an awkward situation or is worried, the little note when Sakuya is happy, the hearts when Kazunari is lowkey flirting with Izumi, it's so cute! Or Omi's O.O face, Taichi's crying face (the usual one, not his face when he cried out of guilt of betraying Mankai), Yuki's done expression, H O M A R E AHA! They each have at least one personalized expression and also quote. Can you hear Kazunari's Yoropiko~☆, Citron's humming, Taichi's loud ass whining and scream of terror, Tsumugi's awkawrd laugh? It's brimming with life.

But also the UI (?how it looks) is joyful. The main screen's background cascading shapes changes depending from which Troupe your current character is from, the loading screen has sakura petals and a bird, the colors are very bright and saturated fitting to the overall color palette of the whole game, the little notebook during practice showing all the necessary infomation and a little sketch by the characters. It's just really charming.

As frustrating as it was, not getting halloween Tsuzuru after 110 pulls or Valentine Omi after 120, it was my first time ever understanding why gachas are called hellholes. Through my strong connections to the characters, their cards automatically appealed to me more. But the art is also so good???? Azuma is always looking flawless obviously but Omi's unbloomed Wolf card, where he is standing in the sunset looking at his camera or Kazunari's Shinobi card, unbloomed all concentrated on his panting and bloomed all shiny smiling like the fireworks in the background? Breathtaking everytime. I also appreciate it not needing multiple copies to unlock the whole backstage story.

I think I'm slowly running out of things to say, which might be good for whoever managed to come this far. I have to say though, A3! helped me through the pandemic. Being a perfect distraction to the world's chaos and more importantly my crushing schoolwork and worries for personal future. I'm a very pessimistic person but seeing the characters overcoming their hardships through the help of their to-be "family" and just being happy doing trouble, gave me a little hope and light for a bit every day. I came to cherish everyone, even those I like the least. I haven't felt like this since Mystic Messenger, which was also a game, that helped me through a difficult time. I can only wish to a shooting star, that it's not the end for the EN Server yet. While yes, the JP server is thriving and I could just switch to reading fantranslation, through my experience, my enjoyment considerably sinks playing like that and I wish to fully enjoy A3!.

Anyways thanks for reading (maybe again). Sorry for all the possible errors on the way here. I'm writing everything directly without too much thought. If you want, you can also share your experiences in the comments. It's always nice to share good memories with others.

Edit: I accidentally posted it already but I wasn't actually done 😓 When I said I had a lot to let out, I meant A LOT

#a3! #i will never forget a3! #in the end i never managed to get halloween and groom Tsuzuru