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silenzahra · 20 days

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Today's the anniversary for me! ✨

I know the Mario Movie was released on April 5th 2023, but back then I was seeing the Holy Week processions with my dad, so I didn't get to go to the cinema until April 8th, which was a Saturday, and that was when everything changed for me 😌💚❤️

This is going to get a bit long, personal and emotional, so it's totally fine if you'd rather not read it! 💖

As I've mentioned, this movie saved my life simply because I was in a terrible place when it came out. Admittedly, I had been feeling a bit better that week thanks to the fact I was going out every day and was distracted and such, but my mind was still not totally... fine.

Until, at 8PM, the Mario Movie finally started and I spent the next hour and a half with a silly smile on my face, feeling like a little kid again and experimenting lots of feelings and emotions I hadn't felt in many months. Happiness. Joy. Laughter. A warm heart. Tension. Pure emotion. Excitement. Nostalgia. The urge to cry, though not from sadness.

And the need to get those cute brothers off the screen and give them each a big bear hug.

(Posted this edit on my Instagram account last Friday.)

Mario and Luigi did really save my life. I had already fallen for them long ago, when I was 13 and played Superstar Saga on my GBA, since that was the very first game that made me see these two as endearing and charming characters with a beautiful sibling bond based not only on love, but also trust, laughter and comfort.

And, in all honesty, seeing this movie, seeing that bond translated into it, was totally a dream come true. Aside from the M&L games, we don't really get to see much of these two taking care of each other (please correct me if I'm mistaken!). Also, I'm a 90s girl, so I had been wanting a good animated Mario movie since... I honestly can't remember. All I know is I used to watch the cartoons (specifically the one based on Super Mario Bros 3), and then I ran into the live action movie from 1993 and... Welp. Let's just say I'd rather forget it 😬 (Sorry if you did like it, it simply was NOT my cup of tea.)

And then this movie was announced, and every new trailer made me feel more and more hyped, and reminded me of my love for the Super Mario franchise. I had already been hyperfixated on it back in 2013-2016, when I played Dream Team and fell even harder for them (especially Luigi), and when I finally got to see this movie, that obsession came back stronger than ever.

I felt like a little child again. I went back to play my old favorite games. I listened to the ost on loop for months, and it ended up becoming my most listened album on Spotify last year.

And I also felt the urge to write again.

Writing has always been an important part of my life. I started at 8 and I simply couldn't stop. To me, it is like breathing, so when I spend some time away from writing, I'm not exaggerating when I say I feel a physical pain on my chest. And due to the bad place I was in, I had been away from it for way too many months.

It turns out all I needed was a dose of brotherly love in order to feel my fingertips tingling again with the urgent need to start writing.

So yeah. There are many things I have to celebrate today and to be thankful for. First of all: I'm alive, and happy, and better than ever, still struggling with anxiety and fears but feeling way better than I'd felt in the years before this film came out. I feel emotion, and joy, and will to continue living and enjoying life and fangirling and being myself. I feel connected to Mario and Luigi and my heart simply warms up every single time I think about them (which is 24/7 tbh).

And I'm writing again! 2023 was the year I've written the most in my entire life, and I owe it to this wonderful movie, and so far I've continued to write this year too, and that's also thanks to Mario and Luigi.

And of course, and more importantly, this film has led me to meet all of you, beautiful people, and I honestly couldn't be more grateful 🥹🫂💖 With you I can fangirl and scream and cry and be myself, and that's why I felt like sharing this with you guys, because I know you understand and share the feelings I've experimented these months since I first saw this movie. I love each and one of you with all my heart 💖💖💖

And after talking non-stop, I believe I kinda feel like finally showing my face here (the real one, not this one 😂), so... Here I go! 🤭👇

This is me today! 🤭 With lots of Mario stuff as you can see, and I even painted my nails to match the main characters! 💅

The blue is for Toad, the pink is for Peach, green and red for Luigi and Mario (obviously) and black for Bowser since he was played by Jack Black! 😁

Admittedly, I'm not very good at painting my nails because I'm not into makeup and such, but I do like to see them all painted, I think they look beautiful 🥰 Last year I used to paint them red and green all the time since I went not once, not twice, but thirteen times to see this movie, and every time wearing a different shirt 🤭 Though the one I'm wearing today is the one I wore exactly one year ago, as you can see here! 😁

I literally cannot remember when or where I bought it, but it was simply PERFECT to wear to go see this movie 😁 And you bet, when the Toad guard said that quote from the first Super Mario game, I went all silly in the cinema: "OMG my shirt!!!!!" 😂😂😂

And here are some pics from some of the other twelve times I went, and you can get a look at some of the Mario shirts I own! I may go and show them all together in a different post, and maybe also the earrings since I own a lot: red shrooms, superstars, fire flowers, green shrooms... Would you like that? 🥰

Now that I see it, I look a bit scared on the first one 😂 The green shirt I'm wearing on the second one is pure GOLD, and on the third one I kinda felt like I was taking a picture with Mario himself 😂😂😂

I did own some Mario merch before the movie came out, but last year I went and bought tons of it, including shirts, earrings, and of course plushies! 🤭

They look like a cute little family OMG aren't they ADORABLE I love them all so so much 😭❤️💚✨

So this is it! This is my little celebration of the first year since I saw for the first time the movie that saved my life 🥰 In all honestly, I would've liked to bring a fic or something, but as you all know, I went through a very hard Holy Week and I'm still not feeling totally ready to get back to writing (even though I've gotten a couple new ideas, for which I'm deeply grateful).

But I hope sharing my experience and feelings (and my face! 😂) is enough for this year, and let's hope I can bring a new Mario story to share with you guys very soon! 🥰

I love you all so so so so so so so so so so much!!!!! 💖💖💖💖💖

#super mario bros #mario movie #mario movie anniversary #face reveal #this is me!

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ragecndybars · 2 months

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AO3 tag game :3

thanks so much for the tag @mvshortcut !!!!! much appreciated, this was a blast to fill out :D

How many works do you have on AO3?

86! Damn, that's more than I remember 🙀 I have been writing pretty fervently since I was pretty young, though, and I transferred all my old fics from fanfiction dot net to AO3, so it's a long stretch of time. All my old wattpad fics are still rotting somewhere though lmaooo I can't even access them anymore bc I forgot my password and I can't reset it bc I used a school email 😔

What's your total AO3 word count?

443,734! When I get to half a million I'm gonna have to throw myself a party. With boba and everything

How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Oof, okay, here we go. A lot of the fandoms I have tagged on AO3 don't really "count" because they're just aggregate tags for the same fandom, so even though AO3 says the number is 48, I'm gonna count the TRUE number as 17. (It got cut down so much because of how many video game series have different games with different fandom tags on AO3, lmao)

Here's the breakdown of the list:

Persona (Mostly Persona 3)

Fire Emblem (Mostly Shadow Dragon and Blazing Sword)

Legend of Zelda

Pokemon

Professor Layton

RWBY

Kid Icarus: Uprising

Earthbound/MOTHER

Red vs. Blue

Voltron Legendary Defender

Naruto

Final Fantasy XV

Harvest Moon

The Mysterious Benedict Society

The Avengers

Animal Crossing

Care Bears (despite having never actually consumed any Care Bears media to my knowledge)

The worst part is that this stupid list would be much, much, MUCH longer if I finished even a quarter of my WIPs 😭 Hell, even just my "Video Games" subfolder in my "Fanfiction" subfolder has more than 17 subfolders in it...

Y'all don't understand how many random fics my ADHD spares you from ever seeing I have no focus

Top five fics by kudos:

Ash and Emotion (Zelda) - Not surprising, I knew this was my most popular fic. It was for a ZeLink zine full of beautiful work :)

Resemblance (Naruto) - bro I always forget people really liked this one. Literally an unedited drabble I did in an hour for a "pride month drabble challenge" which I immediately abandoned. Trans rights I guess

Always Wanna Play (But You Never Wanna Lose) (Persona 3) - This one isn't surprising either, and I'm very proud of this fic so I'm quite chuffed to see it get so much attention... thanks everyone :')

The Beat of Your Heart (Zelda) - Now this one surprised me a lot. This was just a little piece for ZeLink week... Another unedited one, I literally was writing it on the toilet in church so I could get it out in time 😭

Comfort (Zelda) - Another ZeLink week piece, but I knew this one was popular. Also unedited, lmao. I was writing it on the day of my AP Calc finals and I rushed through the exam so I could have more time to work on the fic 😭 I made some Choices that year

Do you respond to comments?

I try to! But I get very anxious about it and tend to work myself into a tizzy, so I often put it off for later and then forget, haha. Then I'll go and respond to all my comments from the last few months and feel even weirder about it... T_T

What's the fic with the angstiest ending you've ever written?

Oof. That's... a hard one, haha. I've written a couple of fics without happy endings, though I typically don't. At least three fics which end on a canonical character death, for instance. But I'd say the ending which made me the most emo writing was Butter, a Mother 3 fic. It ends with Lucas, who's like 9, recently lost his mother, then lost his twin brother (and thinks it's his fault), and is now being neglected by his father, crawling into bed and crying. So yeah, pretty bleak, lmao... but at least he doesn't die I guess?

Do you write crossovers?

I do, but I haven't posted many yet. I'm not always huge on writing them, but I do think about them a lot. I was working on this one Persona 3 x Fire Emblem Awakening crossover but I lost steam on it, and now there's a really lovely crossover on AO3 with a similar premise that I was SO delighted to come across!!! Hope y'all don't mind me taking a break from linking my own work to shill for this one, hehe

Have you ever gotten hate on a fic?

Unfortunately, yes, about six times, I'd say. Even more unfortunately, most of those times happened earlier on in my fanfic writing career, and I was pretty sensitive to hate back then, so I deleted many of the relevant fics, and some of them I don't even have access to myself anymore.

Not gonna talk about the ones that are still upsetting, but I will talk about the funny examples: on a (since deleted) RWBY fic, I said in the author's note that I "wrote them as platonic, but the fic can be read as WhiteRose", and then I got a glowing comment gushing about how good the story was which ended with "but then you had to ruin it by shitting all over WhiteRose, how about you [long suicide bait]". Third most baffling comment I've ever received.

The two most baffling were on different fics, but both were making the same weird accusation??? One was on a ZeLink fic (actually, on Comfort, my fifth most kudos'ed fic of all time now), and y'know I think I'm just gonna show you the comment in question:

The other one was on a long-since deleted fic which focused on both a romantic ship, as well as a fatherly relationship between one member of the ship and the other member's father. I guess having a fatherly relationship with your father-in-law makes your boyfriend actually your brother (and therefore you can't date him anymore). IDK man people are crazy. (tbf the commenter in question thought I was setting it up so that he'd get adopted by his boyfriend's parents, which would give them more of a case, but like... that didn't happen in the fic and wasn't going to. they just guessed at a future plot development and got angry about their guess)

Do you write smut?

I do, but I've never posted any. I've posted one fic that was very suggestive, I'd even call it "NSFW" in a sense, but never anything explicit. Maybe I will in the future? We'll see if I can ever finish anything smutty, lmao.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep, I had Ultimatum, my longest chapter-fic (and by far my most popular fic in the ff.n days) stolen and posted on another site by somebody. I reported it but never checked back up to see if it got taken down.

I also feel that I've had my work plagiarized pretty damn blatantly in another fandom (I was browsing a certain AU tag and read one which contained all the exact events and sometimes word-for-word dialogue from a fic of mine, just very very slightly rewritten) but the poster had no other works and their writing was definitely extremely juvenile, so... I figured they were a dumb kid and just decided not to raise a fuss. Checked back later and they deleted it, hopefully because they realized they shouldn't do that, so I figure there's no need to start shit over it. Honestly, if that person used that experience as a jumping-off point to write their own fics, then I'm glad it happened, imitation being the highest form of flattery and all.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, though I had someone reach out to me on fanfiction dot net a long time ago and ask permission to translate An Unheard Goodbye, which was super exciting! I agreed, but I don't believe they ever got around to it, or if they did, they never posted it. Still very flattering, and I think about that a lot, hehe.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

HOW COULD I POSSIBLY ANSWER THIS. UM. UM UH. UHHH UM UH I. UM.

I'm.... gonna say Zelda/Link? I haven't written it in FOREVER but it was such a huge part of me coming into my own as a fanfic author, so I have to give it credit for that.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?

.......all of them 😭 god I have so many of these damn things. But for the prime example, I'd point to Ultimatum, an old Pokemon fic that I started in middle school. I got all the way to the climax and I feel bad leaving my readers hanging, but... at this point, if I did continue it, I would honestly have to rewrite the whole fic first just to be in line with my current understanding of the characters.

What are your writing strengths?

Y'know, I think I get character voices down extremely well in a way which elevates my dialogue and narration. That's probably the thing I'm most proud of in my own writing, at least.

What are your writing weaknesses?

BREVITY. Or the utter, glaring lack of it. I have also been known to muddy up my writing with an overabundance of A) adverbs, B) unneeded clauses tacked onto perfectly good sentences, and C) em-dashes 😭

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?

I think it's dope as fuck, but I currently can't really accomplish it because I'm monolingual (NOT FOR LONG IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT, I'M COMING FOR YOU, JAPANESE FLUENCY!!!!). I will also say that I don't like when authors will write characters having a story-important conversation in another language, then put the translations in the end notes or something, requiring you to either read the chapter confused or else keep scrolling back down and back up.... I think even that's totally fine to do if what's being said isn't plot-relevant, though.

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

Naruto. I hadn't read or watched Naruto btw, I had only read other Naruto fanfics. I have spoken on this topic many times, but it remains hilarious to me. Also, so many of my old Naruto fics are lost to the Wattpad times, but I will take this opportunity to once again share a quote which I recently managed to unearth from my long-lost unsung magnum opus:

Never ever will I intentionally attain the level of comedy gold that I managed while writing completely dead serious Naruto fanfiction on Wattpad in 2012.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written so far?

See above. How could I ever top that fic.

In all seriousness, this question always makes me sweat, but I think I'm gonna say Oil, a slightly older fic from my EliHec days which I absolutely obsessed over for months before finally managing to finish. And, unlike most of the fics that I obsess over, I think the obsession actually made it come out better rather than worse, haha.

thanks again for the tag!!!! as for me, I'll tag uhh, hm, @wizard-finix @dreamedge @misty-wisp @flyfish1999 and any other AO3 writers who see this!!! (idk how many of you use AO3 and most of the MBS authors I know have probably already been tagged hehe but anybody who wants to should absolutely feel free!!!!!!!)

#Lee Speaks #tag game #god this is long. i love ranting about my writing thank you again for the tag

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kurisus · 7 months

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Link Click Season 2: Thoughts

Just a post of everything that's been going through my head over the course of this season. First reflections, then theories for next time. Spoilers for all episodes under the cut, obviously. This is also so long Tumblr started glitching out on me, so I hope it reads well~

LU GUANG TIME TRAVELER THEORY REAL BITCHESSSSSS

I know literally everyone had figured this out already but the execution of it was sooooo satisfying. It was to the point where if that wasn't where they were going with him, I wasn't sure what their plans were, and then everything fell into place just perfectly.

I genuinely don't have anything bad to say about that last episode. It was perfectly done in every way, and I'm super excited to see the next season play out--after we get some much-needed conflict establishment in that prequel, whatever it is.

As for the rest of the season though...I agree with the stuff I've seen about the pacing being a sore spot. It didn't ruin the season for me, but the constant recapping of scenes we've already seen + long fight scenes that didn't advance the plot was just kind of frustrating especially watching this weekly as I did and knowing I wasn't going to get answers this time. Episode 2 was the weakest for this, imo, since it felt like half of the episode was made of scenes from the first and the CXS + QL fight, while cool, didn't really do much for me. It felt like I was watching the chimera ant arc from HXH all over again, sometimes.

I've also seen takes that they forced the length of each episode to end on a cliffhanger but I kinda disagree? Season 1 had cliffhangers too, and the episodes were a little shorter. They could have shortened the episodes (to not repeat scenes and not draw out the fights) and still ended on cliffhangers, and I kind of expected those since again they were common in the first season. If I expect anything from Link Click, it's that they'll find a way to make a cliffhanger out of it.

I don't really have an issue with most of the season taking place in a single day either (again...chimera ant arc...literal peak fiction, but holy shit it took like 10 episodes to cover 1 minute in real-time but it wouldn't have been so effective if it didn't take its time), although it is a bit of a change from the first season, which was spread out over months. I rationalize it as the cases themselves happened within 12 hours, so this was kind of just one longer and more detailed case.

The director said he was going for a suspense angle this season rather than heartwrenching, and in that regard I think he succeeded. I didn't cry this season, but I did feel very stressed out the whole time, and the middle chunk of episodes simply flew by every week. They felt 5 minutes long. I have a feeling the next season will balance the best of both worlds--plot-relevant suspense with heartwrenching moments, kind of like the final scene of this season.

So yeah, a sore spot, not really a dealbreaker. I did read the interview with Li Haolin where he acknowledged the pacing issues and said he'll try to do better next season, which I really appreciated. I've seen it happen too often where the following season is too far into production or the showrunner thinks they're above criticism, and the show drops in quality as a result. I think season 3 will be the best yet, but I'm also scared by him saying the main story and ending are set in stone--what are they gonna do to us? How many seasons will they go on? I'd rather have the story come to its natural conclusion than be dragged on because it's popular.

Moving on, I liked the way they used the time travel powers this season to figure out more about the people chasing them, and to give Chen Bin some closure. Basically in a way that was plot relevant as opposed to exposition, although I wish they'd used their powers more in the back half. I thought it was a cool utilization of what we already know.

I liked the new characters we got this season, esp the parts revolving around the twins (and episode 9!!! it was so artsy!!!!). They made for very compelling characters, and I think Qian Jin will be back for more. Though I feel like the Li Tianchen we got was a bit different than his presentation last season where he was a childish, but highly intelligent, serial killer who is single-minded in his ruthlessness. This version seems to be struggling with his own motivations, mainly because his sister didn't follow him down the same path and he doesn't trust the guy giving him orders. It's a more rounded character, but not as compelling of a villain. I'm excited to see what happens when he teams up with Liu Xiao, though, since I have a feeling LX is going to be like my original interpretation of LTC. Redemption arc for LTC? Or will he get worse?

And what was up with Captain Xiao telling the main characters he was planning to resign once he caught Chen Bin's killer, then announcing he was promoted at the end? I know technically Tianchen is still at large, but cmon, he got a promotion for getting his colleagues killed? They should have just omitted the line about him resigning, tbh.

In terms of expectations vs reality for this season, I tried not to have expectations because I didn't want to be let down, but I sort of developed them anyway. My sole expectation was "challenge the idea that death is unchangeable" which they did get to--but only at the very beginning with LG's flashback, and then again in the last episode when they gave more context to it, so it wasn't the focus. This is because my vision for the season was one in which CXS experiences LG's death, then rewinds time to try to fix it, each time getting a step closer to solving the mystery. We didn't end up getting that because he remembered his character development, but I do kind of wonder what that would have been like. Maybe a little too close to Steins;Gate, and then I'd have been disappointed that they did the same thing as another time travel show I love, lol.

In any case, it seems they're going to do that next season. Or the following. However long it takes for them to elaborate on whatever the hell it is that Lu Guang did.

I also felt like they were going to go back in time to when CXS thought LG was dead and absolutely broke down, and how much of that was just a miscommunication, except this time he would be dead for real. But the more I think about it, the more it seems unlikely with the direction the story has been heading. Instead, LAN was simply trolling us with LG's fate for 2 years and pulled a switcharoo that CXS was the one we should fear for next? idk I want them to go back to the absolute despair of thinking your partner/best friend/boyfriend died while you were separated, but not hit the brakes on it so quickly.

Which brings me to my next concern--because of how everything happened so close together, the main characters didn't have much time to process everything that happened to them since last time. Qiao Ling didn't reflect much on her being possessed and stabbing someone she thinks of as a friend (remember how she screamed when she saw the blood on her hands? I wanted more of that), CXS and LG didn't get to talk about LG being stabbed, almost dying, and then kidnapped, also while thinking he was dead for a few hours there; and CXS didn't get a breather after being thrown into an extremely intense domestic violence situation unexpectedly, and coming out of it nearly collapsing. Because of the short timeskip at the end of the season, it seems like they may just skip over this and leave these conversations between seasons. Or the trauma they endured may come back up in new and spicy ways. I'll be interested to see what they do, but I'm going to be kind of bummed if they don't talk about any of what happened to each other, since that was such a big part of season 1.

So from reflections, on to theories...After watching episode 2, I developed a theory that I will lay out here because of how much I got right. Yes, I'm gonna brag a bit:

I was right about Cheng Xiaoshi dying originally and Lu Guang apparently having both sets of powers, as seen when he clapped back in time, but the rest I have a few questions about.

First, the matter of the powers. I've seen a lot of people saying powers are passed when their user dies, but I don't think they are because I don't know how CXS would have powers in the present day unless a whole character we don't know about died in his arms before he even met LG. I also don't believe that Tianxi is dead either (they didn't show me a body and I won't believe it until I see one), so while I think it's possible QL has her powers and doesn't realize it, she didn't transfer them with death.

Next, how many times has LG rewound time? My gut feeling was that this is his first time because of how much has changed this time around. He didn't know about Tianchen and vice versa, so either CXS died before the twins came into the picture or the timeline has changed enough that now other people with powers are involved when they weren't before. Then again, he leapt so far back in the timeline (that basketball game) it wouldn't surprise me if none of the show's canon was part of the original timeline.

Third, how did CXS die? And who killed him? Maybe it was LX, maybe it was QJ (thinking of how LG's first instinct when meeting the guy was to try to LITERALLY PUNCH HIM TO DEATH), maybe it was someone we haven't met yet...I think we can agree he was murdered, though, and it wasn't an accidental death. Perhaps he was shot, perhaps stabbed, but more than anything I'm interested to see how that unfolds since LG seems to feel responsible and I have to wonder how much is survivor's guilt and how much is because he caused it.

Fourth, if death is a node that can be changed, would it have saved CXS's life if LG had died there? The times we've seen the timeline change, the same person still died at roughly the same time, but the circumstances got altered. I'm thinking here of Emma's death changing from suicide to murder (? I haven't rewatched season 1 since before season 2 started so I could be wrong), and Chen Bin going from jumping off the roof while possessed to losing the possession but being pushed (we saw the door closing on him originally). If someone else had killed themselves at that time, would he still be alive? It seems strange the laws would work as "someone has to die, it doesn't matter who." The only way I can think of this idea working in the context of our main duo is if CXS and LG are somehow the same person and all I can say is, god I hope not lmao, but then what was up with LG thinking "better me than him"?

Fifth, CXS apparently died on September 13 (or September 12, since LG leaped 5 minutes after midnight), but season 1 skipped right over that date and the end and this whole season took place in late October (going by the dates. I have seen the posts about time being broken, though, so let's see if that was stuff changing in the writing process without being fixed or something intentional). Was LG really able to delay his death by a whole month (causing a major timeline shift), or do we still have most of a year left before it happens? CXS was wearing his season 1 outfit when he died, but that could very well be a red herring.

Sixth, does LX have powers? I think he must, but what are they? How much does he know (ie just that the timeline is being fucked with, or does he know who is doing it?), and is he working for a higher power to "fix" time or simply himself? How will Tianchen help him achieve his goals? To me it seems likely LX is aware of other people with powers since he appeared to give advice to Tianchen in a crucial hour, then was in the same foreign country as our main two. Maybe he keeps tabs on all power users, or maybe he actually knows the main two personally but they don't know he's the one after them. He's certainly wise beyond his years is all I can say for now.

My post got so long Tumblr is yelling at me about a character limit, so that's why there's a break here. To the next text block~

I'm curious to see how much of what happened this season will be changed, nullified, or otherwise wiggled around in the timeline. Since it seems like a lot of this didn't happen in the original timeline, what of CXS possessing LG? Were those inconsistencies (how the window was broken, the phone being faceup/facedown, the password knowledge being only incidental) a result of animation errors or small shifts in the timeline? Will these things be important later? Until they say otherwise, my resting theory is that LG took that photo and used his power to read forward into time, see the boat's location, and send it to QL, and the actual hospital breakout was him originally. We have seen now that he can fight.

Link Click's time travel has always been less rules more vibes to me so I don't mind if these inconsistencies don't end up being important after all, but all the same it will he cool if they are.

That scene of CXS and QL as little kids is very precious to me, but it just occurred to me that took place before they knew LG and thus before he started fucking with the timeline. How much of pre-series canon will be changed as a result, ie those memories QL has? We still don't know anything about CXS's parents either, so both of these things may get overwritten in the timeline. Imagine a timeline where CXS was completely lonely...

QJ was built up as a villain a lot this season so I wouldn't be at all surprised if he busted out of prison in the second half or the end of next season. Another one for LX to manipulate? Will he be the one getting him out?

Does QL have powers now? It seems like Tianxi gave her powers at the end there, but she hasn't realized it yet. I was kinda hoping she doesn't since I'd prefer one of the three remains "normal," but if that's the direction they're taking, I trust they'll do something interesting with it, especially since that power is required for Tianchen to kill people.

Speaking of, I'm super excited to find out what will happen when CXS inevitably discovers what LG has been keeping from him. Maybe QL will confront LG first and the two of them will try to figure things out, only for CXS to feel doubly betrayed that the two closest friends he has in his life know he's died and haven't said anything about it to him, and have been actively trying to prevent his death again. The angst fallout with that will be delicious. I'm also thinking of the shot in the season 2 OP of QL turning her back on him once the song reverses, hmmm.

LTC only became aware of CXS in the first place because when he was talking to Emma on the bridge, he said he's a time traveler and gave his name. So, it's a loop, but we have yet to see how LTC figured out where CXS worked and learned who his friends are to go after Xu Shanshan. Will LG reach the same conclusion and somehow cause that action to be undone, and will that in turn affect LX's perception of events?

All in all, despite some issues with the pacing of season 2 dragging it down and making it not quite as good as season 1, I still really enjoyed it and thought the music especially was a big upgrade from what was already so good (VORTEX, Until It Dies, and Mastermind will be on loop for a while longer). I also had a great time checking the tags regularly for fanart, gifsets, and theories, and I'm excited to see what unhinged theories we'll develop by the time season 3 rolls around. Until then, see ya in the prequel!

#Link Click #shiguang daili ren #时光代理人 #this is so LONG hdkjfhkjd sorry but POV you're my friend on Discord and waking up to these half-baked thoughts every morning #these are at least more formulated than that #shoutout to my friends for supporting my insanity tho. yall are real ones #live update

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dragonofeternal · 4 months

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2 tag memes

I got tagged in two different memes this week! Yaaay~

Current things tag meme!

Tagged by @ghoul-misadventures

3 ships: Millionsummers, Vashwood, LeoJoker

Last song: "radio protector" by 65daysofstatic

Currently reading: The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle

Currently watching: I don't really watch a lot of TV, but I have been on and off binging through the "how it's actually made" parody dub-overs by huggbees on youtube. I also want to check out Flanagan's "Fall of the House of Usher" but starting shows is hard for me XDD

Last movie: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh assuming that hours long youtube documentaries don't count, then I think the last thing I watched might have been the fucking FF7 Advent Children Director's Cut that we rewatched over the summer. (I feel like I've watched something since then but I can't. Remember. What it would have been. So. Yeah.)

Currently consuming: After binging through it in like 2 days, I am now more slowly replaying through Paranormasight

Currently craving: hot chocolate bc it's really cold and rainy here =A=

15 people 15 questions tag meme

tagged by @rosemirmir!

1. are you named after anyone? My first name is the name of my cut-throat great- (or was it great-great?) grandmother who earned the family fortune, and my middle name came from my mom's college roommate.

2. when was the last time you cried? Uhhhh... Like... a couple therapy sessions ago? I have a really good therapist, so we're working on a lot of shit, but unfortunately that means I cry somewhat frequently ><

3. do you have kids? Nope! Not really my scene, but more power to those who do.

4. what sports do you play/have you played? I did basketball on and off in elementary school, and my high school tried to get me to join the basketball team there too, but uhhh I wanted to do theatre more and I only had time to do one or the other. Not a "sport" but I'm gonna be taking an aerial silks class soon!

5. do you use sarcasm? Never. (yes)

6. what’s the first thing you notice about people? I don't. (I dunno? Height? I'll be honest and say I'm not the most observant about other people lol)

7. what’s your eye color? Blue~

8. scary movies or happy endings? That's a weird dichotomy to present XDDD I guess happy endings if we're talking movies, because I prefer horror in games, writing, comics, and audio mediums slightly more than movies.

9. any talents? Writing and acting spring to mind as two that are both "I've always been fairly talented in this" and "I have worked a lot to hone this skill."

10. where were you born? DC~

11. what are your hobbies Numerous. Uhhh, I write, I draw, I play video and tabletop games, I take walks, I enjoy watching anime and getting way too serious about it.....

12. do you have any pets? We have four cats at home! Two are technically "mine" and Killians, and two are technically Pat's, but yeah. They're good kitties

13. how tall are you? 5'9"

14. favorite subject in school? History! (Though I also honestly very much enjoyed Math bc it was one of the easiest to keep on top of homework and shit in lol)

15. dream job Honestly I'm really, really happy with my current job. It's not anything I necessarily would have expected being like HOMGORZ DREAM JOBBBBB but it's like? Really fulfilling and enjoyable? So uh. Admin for an LGBTQ Health Equity Center XDDD.

tagging @rosemirmir @ghoul-misadventures @arahith @onlines @clockworkspider @setsuntamew @ehyde @jacenbren @orcelito @xx-bluesummers-xx and whoever else feels inspired to do either of these in the most "seriously no pressure guys just do it if you feel like it" way XDD

#long post #tag meme #state of the liz

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callunavulgari · 4 months

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Year In Life | 2023

Or that annual New Year’s meme where I talk about what the year was like to live through. 2023 features: a wedding (!!!), four (??) different trips (including the ridiculous two week long honeymoon in the PNW), and the death of a loved one.

1. What did you do in 2023 that you’d never done before? Took a trip to DC to see Joe Hisaishi live! Saw the natural history museum! Visited the PNW and saw: Mt Rainier, the redwoods, the most northwestern point of the US, Seattle, the Hoh rainforest including the Hall of Mosses, Lake Crescent, Forks, Crater Lake, Portland, the remnants of wildfires, a little place called Wild Pear with the best butternut squash soup I've had in my entire life, another little place that I can't remember the name of but had a sherpa stew that will warm my soul until death, and San Francisco! Saw the ghoul boys for Ghost Files Live! Went back to Vegas and saw U2 in the sphere! Planned a wedding! Had a bachelorette weekend! Oh, and yeah, GOT MARRIED!!!!!!!

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year? My resolution for 2023 was to be HAPPY. And you know what? I fucking was. Other than the INTENSE anxiety of planning the wedding, 2023 treated me gently. My wedding day was singlehandedly the most blissful day of my entire life. I thought it was going to be a shit show, but goddamn if it wasn't perfect. So YES, I kept my new years resolution. And yes, I will make more for next year.

Resolutions for 2024 - Be happy and healthy. Eat good food. Doordash less, cook more. Exercise. Go on daily walks, even if they're short. Get dressed (almost) every day. Brush your teeth. Write 50k of sad ghost girl (or another original idea). Attend a pottery class. Also, cough, buy a house?

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? I don't think so? A couple facebook friends. One of my bridesmaids is due next year though.

4. Did anyone close to you die? My grandmother passed this year on the last day of our honeymoon. I got the news on a beach in San Francisco. My dad texted me a time of death. I was fine emotionally for the most part at first, she's had dementia for seven years and I'd said my goodbyes the last time that we visited. I was fine. FINE. And then Nick, thirteen days my husband, twelve years my partner, tentatively asked if I wanted to buy some flowers and toss them in the bay.

I cried. Not hard. But it broke something loose, something that saw the beauty of that place- waves lapping against the shores, the golden gate bridge looming in the distance, two little boys making sandcastles while a guy with a saxophone played for tourists closer to the street. I wanted to scream. As loudly as I could. Just to see if it would make a difference. I didn't. I wept quietly, shielded by my sunglasses, Nick holding my hand next to me and stared out at a bay that she'd never seen before, that she never would.

And then I shook my shoulders out and we went to go meet up for the sunset sail on the bay, which I'd booked since it was our last night. Something special. I didn't want to miss it, not on our last night. It was pretty, but bitterly cold because fog moved in when we neared Alcatraz and just wouldn't quit. The sunset was lovely. I was queasy from the rocking of the sailboat. I couldn't stop thinking about her.

I didn't cry again, not at the funeral, not at the small celebration of life afterwards. It hurts in a different way, I think, mourning the death of someone who has been lost to you for so many years while their body lingers on. I looked back at old facebook posts from when she was still her, when she wrote letters on my wall because she didn't understand how messenger worked. She was the third of four sisters, all gone before her. She used to have so many friends and so few people showed to the funeral. It would have made her sad to see, I think.

5. What countries did you visit? Alternatively, what is your favorite place that you did go this year? No countries. We nearly booked our honeymoon to Portugal, but turns out weddings are expensive and I managed to do two weeks in the PNW for half the cost. I will say though that I have wanted to visit the west coast for years, so I am incredibly glad that we went. My favorite of all of the places that we went is a tie between Mt Rainier and Crater Lake. One- the pull of a mountain is legit. I grew up with the Appalachians, but goddamn, it doesn't prepare you for the sight of something Like Mt Rainier. Two- nobody effing told me that Crater Lake was THAT blue. The water, brilliant blue. The sky, brilliant blue. The air, crisp. The rest of it, PACKED with chipmunks. It was amazing. The whole trip was, but damn.

Some highlights-

6. What would you like to have in 2024 that you lacked in 2023? My answer to this last year was a husband. And like, CHECKMARK there. For 2024, and I know that this is dreaming big, but we are going to try - TRY - to buy a house this year. We will have to see how that goes.

7. What date from 2023 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? August 26th 2023. ❤️ 8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? I married my best friend. And I also survived the wedding planning process, christ. I mean don't get me wrong, the day was great, it was beautiful, wouldn't change it for the world. But sometimes I think that I should have saved myself the stress and eloped somewhere.

9. What was your biggest failure? Eh, I mean I didn't lose the weight that I wanted for the wedding, but I'm not going to hold that against me. I bought a dress that I felt pretty in with the size I was at rather than the one I wanted to be and I do not regret that. I did a lot of weightlifting and I'm strong enough to do squats with Nick on my back, so that's progress enough for now. 10. Did you suffer illness or injury? We got covid again coming back from our honeymoon, which was less than ideal. Mask up in the giant metal tubes, friends.

11. What was the best thing you bought? I'm honestly blanking on this right now. We bought a ton of stuff for the wedding, so... that? I got some neat stuff at farmers markets. I treated myself to good headphones and a proper stand for my computer. 12. Whose behavior merited celebration? Honestly? Nick's mom. We had a falling out years and years ago and while we've had a steady truce going since about 2016-2017 or so, I always feel like we're on thin ice. She's a bit of a narcissist, she holds grudges, and honestly, I'm pretty sure that she'd despise anyone that Nick or his brother ended up with. She does not like other women.

But. She behaved herself for the wedding. There were a couple small things- she almost made our bartenders cry because they mixed up our drink packages (they fixed it, it wasn't a big deal, we had NA drinks leftover from the rehearsal the night before and they went to get more) and her dress was a pale enough pink that it showed up in all of the pictures as white, but you know what? It's a win. She seemed genuinely happy during the wedding. She didn't start shit or make a fool of herself. It was just nice.

Who knows what the future has in store on this front, but for now? I'm taking it as a win and moving on. 13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? So, my mother, stepfather, and both of my brothers didn't show up to the wedding. It... wasn't exactly unexpected and when it comes down to it both my sister and I were relieved that my mom wasn't there. If she had been I guarantee the day wouldn't have gone as smoothly as it did.

But I was upset that my brothers couldn't be there. They had legitimate reasons, but it still hurt. So not appalled so much, but definitely sad.

14. Where did most of your money go? Ha. Ha ha ha. Weddings are fucking expensive. We set a budget that would have been completely and totally reasonable if we'd had the wedding prior to 2020. And then we got to actually do the research and realized that our budget was laughably impossible. We had help from Nick's mom and his grandparents, but goddamn, every time I think of how much money was sunk into one day I want to vomit. 15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? The WEDDING. The HONEYMOON. Mt Rainier! Crater Lake! The redwoods! And then, y'know, on a smaller scale: seeing Joe Hisaishi in concert, seeing the Beatles show in Vegas again, getting to do a spooky little autumn drive to see the ghoul boys live. Books. I got a whimsical little tattoo with a flying whale and a castle in the sky.

16. What song will always remind you of 2023? Stand By Me. Paradise Valley. Hello Stranger. Glasgow Love Theme. The Spiritfarer soundtrack. A million Miley Cyrus (?) songs. Eat Your Young. Green Green Grass.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: i. happier or sadder? Happier. So much happier. ii. thinner or fatter? Same size, I think? More muscle, but the scale is the same. iii. richer or poorer? Uh, probably either poorer or around the same. We've recovered a bit from the wedding, but it's been rough. 18. What do you wish you’d done more of? I genuinely do wish that I'd taken better care of myself. My blood pressure has been up, I've been having more heart palpitations, more brain fog, more headaches. And I mean, I did weight lifting, great. But I do genuinely need to eat better. I need to lose weight not because I hate how I look, but because I have sleep apnea and can't tolerate the CPAP, which means that if I don't lose weight or get my tonsils removed my blood pressure will continue to spike until I die. So. Weight loss IS a legitimate goal this year, because it is necessary.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Being an anxious mess about the wedding? I mean that's easy to say now that it's in the rearview, but the ABSURD spikes of adrenaline that I would get just from thinking about the day could NOT have been healthy.

20. How will you be spending Christmas? For Christmas Eve, we honestly just kind of lounged around. We watched a movie. Made the most mouthwatering slow-cooked beef tenderloin that I splurged on from the local butcher. Opened our one present and proceeded to not read them OR make hot chocolate.

For Christmas Day, we opened our gifts, opened the cat's gifts, then went and had Christmas at Nick's aunt's house. Other than his cousin getting engaged to someone that the entire family hates, it went well. 21. How will you be spending New Year’s Eve? We spent it inside. I made a pasta bake while Nick made the pirozki. Unfortunately, I didn't take enough lactaid to counteract the sheer amount of cheese in the pasta so I spent the hours leading up to midnight feeling NOT well, and then we drank sparkling water out of some fancy glasses instead of the wine I bought. 22. Did you fall in love in 2023? Okay, so it sounds trite, but yes? I mean, obviously I've been in love with him since 2012. But I don't know. It's different? I feel more at peace with it. Yes, I love him, but he picked me. We picked each other forever and then swore it in front of all of our favorite people. I didn't expect it to feel much different, and I mean, it's still mostly the same. We sleep in the same bed, we eat the same food, we love the same cats, we kiss each other, we make stupid fart jokes. But it's different. At least a little bit. 23. Best month for you this year? End of August/early September was amazing, mostly because of the trip (and the wedding). <This was my answer last year and the year before, but it still holds true, for obvious reasons.

24. What was your favorite TV program? Of just 2022? All right, so, favorites in (mostly) chronological order: Owl House season 3, Lockwood and Co, The Last of Us, Russian Doll season 2, Shadow and Bone season 2, Extraordinary Attorney Woo, Vox Machina season 2, The Diplomat, Queer Eye, Wheel of Time season 2, Interview with the Vampire, Fionna and Cake, The Fall of the House of Usher, Scavengers Reign, Loki season 2, Castlevania: Noctourne, Yu Yu Hakusho live action, One Piece live action, Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Of those, over all my favorite was Loki, hands down. The ENDING was just some of the best cinema I've seen at Marvel in YEARS. The score! UGH, it was perfection. Owl House season 3 was a close second.

Of just 2023, though? Probably Fionna and Cake. We honestly loved it so much. I think I ended up liking it more than I ever did Adventure Time.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? No hate! Well, at least no one that I know. At this point every active politician could get struck down by lightning and I would mourn very few of them.

26. What was the best book you read? Ugh, there were so many bangers this year. Honestly probably a tie between Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow and Tress and the Emerald Sea.

Honorable mentions: Starling House, A Power Unbound, A Day of Fallen Night, and Thistlefoot.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Hozier's new album has been a big part of my top 50. Oh, Epic the Musical has been an effing joy!

28. What did you want and got? A husband? Yeah, I'm gonna go with that. A husband. It's still weird to say.

29. What did you want but didn’t get? Ummmmmmmm, it's hard to say a honeymoon in Portugal because I am over the moon and not unappreciative of what we did do. But. I do REALLY wish that I'd gotten to see Portugal.

And on a more somber note, before we realized that my grandma was getting too bad to attend the wedding, I'd planned a dance with her. She always used to sing My Heart Will Go On to me when I was little, and I just, really wanted to have that. Instead, I played it for her the day that I said my goodbyes and showed her a picture of my dress. It was hard, but it was enough.

30. What was your favorite film of this year? I rewatched Lord of the Rings approximately a million times this year. Honestly most of the movies I DID watch were rewatches in some way or another. I loved Across the Spiderverse, the new Persuasion movie, and Nimona. Oh, and I watched Suzume in April and the Boy and the Heron for my birthday. All of those were amazing. Absolute top favorite was probably Suzume. Nimona is VERY close though. Same with Across the Spiderverse.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 34 this year! Which is great because I've had this whole weird thing where I was convinced that I would die at 33 since I was around 7 years old, so turning 34 was very nice. I did splurge a bit this year. We went to the Yuletide Village on Friday, which is basically the grounds for the Renaissance Festival done up in Christmas lights. I got to see Krampus! And Mari Lwyd! And drink hot cocoa! And buy a REALLY cool coat.

And then as if all that wasn't enough, on my actual birthday we booked a room at the bed and breakfast that our wedding was held at because they're selling it soon. We had good cheese and wine, got to revisit the pine chapel and dance all alone to our first dance song, then had dinner and walked around a lit up Granville. And then went back to our room at the B&B and did CENSORED things in my wedding dress (look, we were too tired that night and I had a fractured foot, it was a crazy day - leave me alone) and Nick surprised me with a birthday cake from the baker that we got our wedding cake from. It was nice. The breakfast the next morning was amazing.

And then we went to see The Boy and the Heron and had a relaxing Sunday. So you know, not a big deal at all. Definitely a far cry from last year where I, oh yes, covered for a coworker and then had to go to a company party at a restaurant that I hate.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Hm. Still Mal. 33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2023? Hahaha, my hybrid job turned into a completely remote job. Which is great in theory, but means that I spent most of 2023 in my pajamas without a bra. When I WASN'T in my pajamas, I tended towards jeans and t-shirts/sweaters. One of our friends got married in July though and I got to wear the COOLEST dress. 34. What kept you sane? Nick, usually. Rigby has been a huge help too. 35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? It was a good year for Hozier, imo. 36. What political issue stirred you the most? I have had “fuck Donald Trump” as the answer to this question since 2015. And for the first time in half a decade… it’s not him. It’s all the problems he left behind. So I guess it is still at least a LITTLE bit “FUCK DONALD TRUMP IN THE EAR 20156789 2023″

Actual answer to this question though - Gaza. Ukraine. And to a lesser extent- all of the bullshit corporate stooges trying to use AI to replace real workers. Also getting legitimately nervous about next year. Though Ohio DID turn out and voted to: not let the republicans fuck with majority rules, protect abortion rights, and legalized recreational marijuana. So, small wins, I guess.

37. Who did you miss? Mal. My brothers. My grandma. 38. Who was the best new person you met? I met this REALLY cool chick at the place I get my hair done. We bonded over her playing Zelda lofi in the hairwashing room and geeked out over Tears of the Kingdom. She's so freaking cool and I want to be her friend.

39. Talk about a new friend that you made this year: Other than her... I don't think I made any?

40. Post a picture from the beginning of the year: Technically from January 1st 2023 because I'm 90% sure that it was taken after midnight. We went to an INSANE warehouse party to ring in the New Year last year and were out much later than I wanted to be.

41. Post a picture from the end of the year From December 15th - which is apparently just the day that I get my hair done now. Since the wedding is over I finally committed to coloring my hair for the first time since 2020. It was long overdue and am excited to cut it short in the spring, but I actually think this is the first haircut where I miss the long hair?

42. A memorable meal discovered this year? Oh my GOD, that sherpa stew. We obviously had a lot of good food on our trip. Piroshky Piroshky was my favorite highlight from Pike's Place and then there was a restaurant in Salem, Oregon that had the BEST butternut squash soup and pulled pork that I have ever had. It was amazing. I would go back to Oregon for this soup alone.

But that sherpa stew. It cups my heart in its soupy little fist.

43. What was your favorite memory this year? Honestly, there were a lot of great moments this year. Obviously the wedding was the highlight, but the rest of it was pretty great too. The night of the Joe Hisaishi concert it stormed as the concert was finishing and since the venue was mostly outdoors, everyone got soaked. It was magical. The honeymoon highlights - the breathtaking awe of Mt Rainier, the beauty of the golden rays of the setting sun in the Hall of Mosses, the SIZE and GRANDNESS of Crater Lake. The drive up to Michigan to see Ghost Files live, how the drive there was this perfect little time capsule of autumn in the midwest, stormclouds on the horizon and corn fields all around us. The day after, when we stopped into Ann Arbor to visit the cherry store that's only in Michigan, how I found the BEST possible boots at a little store. How we found another amazing little independent book store just down the street. The way Nick's mom looked after the Cirque du Soleil Beatles show, where she turned to me and said that it was her best birthday ever. Dancing alone in the pavilion where we had our reception, crooning the song to each other in the dark while the lights from the pine chapel twinkled warmly at us from 20 feet away, beckoning.

And the wedding. Obviously the wedding.

The night before, where we had a private little ceremony at the stroke of midnight, there in the dark, nightsong all around us. Just us, our officiant, his brother, and my sister and her husband. My hair was damp and frizzy from the heat, from the helter skelter of the rehearsal earlier. He was in a t-shirt and slacks that were almost highwaters. But we read our vows to each other, sealed it with a kiss.

August 26th, 12:02am. A secret, just for us. Our siblings sworn to secrecy.

And then the next day, the note that was slipped under our door from our dear friend who officiated the wedding (both public and private), written on a torn bit of notebook paper: "May today be the first chaotic day of joy in a shared life full of chaotic joy." The breakfast: dutch baby with caramelized apples, sausage links, orange juice, earl grey. Watching Annie put together bouquets at the coffee table next to the kitchen. Going to work, putting tables together. Called back to the house, hair and makeup. Granola bars one and two. My girls singing Chapel of Love to me in the bridal suite, the swell of emotion in my heart - these are my people, they love me, they're so happy. First look, Nick's eyes, his smile. So familiar, that first almost wary glint, scared to look, scared he'll mess it up in front of the photographers, the way he smiled when he saw me, wide and real, almost a laugh, then the way it curled, lopsided, a bashful tilt to his mouth as he said my name. A hug. A moment of peace before the storm. A preying mantis on the porch railing, bumblebees buzzing around my skirt. Will I remember them in twenty years? In thirty?

Fast, fast, everything goes so fast afterwards. Separate. First look with dad, with girls, line up for the walk down the aisle, careful of the puddle. Listen for One Summers Day - they didn't get the song right and are playing the orchestral version instead of the piano. Instead of soft and sweet, there's brass in the pines, french horns ushering us to our spots. Wait wait, start walking - wedding party first. My dad is nervous next to me, he keeps fidgeting. Girls and groomsmen gone, glasgow love theme starts. I'm practically dragging my dad down the aisle. Annie warned me that everyone would stand, but it still catches me by surprise. Look up, bouquet tilted just so, don't trip on the roots. I don't even look at our guests, I don't check to see if my side looks lopsided without my family there, my eyes are on him, on Annie. My heart - I feel.

Ceremony goes fast. Seth reads Pablo Neruda. Tanya reads Neil Gaiman. My eyes are wet, I blink the tears back. Handfasting cords tied loosely, begin to get anxious about how I'm going to put the ring on with my hand tied, but Annie's already removing them. I put the ring on the wrong hand, a hot flash of shame gone in seconds, kiss kiss kiss- time for bubbles, walk.

Pictures. So many pictures. Go to bustle dress, granola bar 3. I choke on it. Back to the reception, big entrance. Too queasy to eat much, I picked at the bread, at the salad, at the chicken. Drank a ginger ale, left my martini untouched. Cake cutting, burst of sugar on the tongue, still queasy. Dancing soon - will I get it wrong? First dance- spun me a little too hard, but we laughed. I didn't feel the eyes on us. I fixed his glasses when they slipped down his nose, everyone laughed. Father-daughter dance, was it a mistake? Should have practiced, should have figured out how dads and daughters dance. Swayed. He kept me talking. Kept my mind off my nerves. Looking back on the wedding footage, everyone was crying. Mother-son dance, more tears. The sheer emotional whiplash of going from Baby Mine to Click Click Boom - but it's what his mom wanted, wanted to have the wedding party do the bernie. Cringy, but fine, we'll do it.

Group selfie on the dance floor, first couples dance dedicated to his grandparents - their anniversary was two days previous, so I found out what their song was and had the DJ play it for them. His grandpa cried. His grandma cried. I cried. The photographer cried. Next slow song, it's the song one of our groomsmen got married to - his wife already left, more tears because he's alone at the head table. Pulled away, golden hour photos. A dream. Beautiful. So queasy. Go back to the house to pee, almost vomit into the toilet, nearly black out. More photos. A moment of peace in the pines - they rickrolled everyone without me.

Dancing, how did I dance so much? Photographers leave. They're playing all my favorites now that we're back, too much dancing, need to sit down. Forgot about the bouquet toss, need to do it while I have the energy. So many people have left - make it gender neutral, get people up there. Whoever wants a bouquet. My best friend catches the bouquet. I hurl myself at her and almost take us to the ground. More dancing - where is Nick? Smoking cigars with his brother. More dancing. Someone gives me a martini, but I can only drink a few sips. So tired, my foot hurts, but another two hours to go.

We sing - Bohemian Rhapsody, Take On Me, The Time of My Life. Should we be embarrassed? Too happy. Sit, talk, make the rounds. More dancing.

Winding down. It's time, last two dances. Piano Man, the DJ makes everyone get in a ring around us, it's embarrassing, but god I'm so happy. Last dance, just us. Paradise Valley, crooning quietly to each other in the dark. Tears on my cheeks. On his. A kiss, no one can see, this one is just us.

Goodbyes, see you laters, can't find my phone, someone took it, need to find the phone, need to sit, need to get out of this stupid dress, my foot hurts. Bridesmaids taking charge, have things torn down and presentable in thirty minutes flat. More goodbyes, limp across the field with a groomsmen, still can't find my phone. Find my phone, take off the jewelry, get close to crying. Someone helps me upstairs? Or maybe I did it myself. Realize I can't get the dress off on my own. Think about crying. Foot hurts, why does it hurt so much? Officiant finds me, helps me take off my shoes. Unbuttons my dress for me, leaves it half on so she can figure out what's wrong with my foot. Oh, almost go into shock, oh, it's fractured. Go to the doctor? Honeymoon is in two days. She massages my aching shoulders, my feet. It's embarrassing, but she's an OT, she doesn't want me in pain.

Nick finds us, tired and drooping, but happy. Annie leaves. Sleep now? Yes, sleep. Hurting and more exhausted than we've ever been, but fuck, so happy. Such a good day. We did good.

44. What are you excited for next year? I am incredibly excited to no longer be planning a wedding. May buy a house. May go on a vacation. May quit my job. We'll see.

45. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2023: My valuable life lesson in the year of 2020 was: Life sucks. Keep your head on straight. Mourn your dead and love your living like you’ll never see them again. Live life like you could die tomorrow. And don’t take the little things for granted.

And you know what, I’m going to keep that. I think it’s a good reminder.

46. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: puff out your chest, take a deep breath you're gonna be okay if it's loud in your mind, just take your time you're gonna be okay - You're Gonna Be Okay, Ashh Blackwood

2018 me apparently quoted Singing in the Rain. 2019 quoted something sad and pretentious. 2020 me quoted This Year, because she was a dramatic bitch and hurting. 2021 me quoted an assurance that I wasn’t broken. 2022 me was tired and sad and just wanted to feel human again.

2023 me was a weird mess of anxiety, but mostly happy. The anxiety was a bitch, will always be a bitch. But this song kept me going.

#heather says what #year in review #2023 #new year's memes #tw: death #may have written an entirely too long stream of consciousness about the wedding #whoops

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artzychic27 · 1 year

Note

Incorrect sb+ib with she ra and the princesses of power quotes?

Max: Imperfection is what makes scientific experimentation possible! Imperfection is beautiful!... At least, to me.

—

Alya: Isn’t it obvious? There’s an amok spy somewhere in the school! *Thunder and lightning* And no one is going anywhere until we figure out who it is!

—

Scarlet Beetle: He’s just so cute!

Monarch: I am not cute!

—

Rose: It’s not easy being the friendly and upbeat girl all the time! And I get that it’s hard being friends sometimes. You gotta work at it. So why am I always the only one who’s willing to work at it?

—

Jean: I can’t cry on cue. Whenever a roll calls for tears, the only thing that works is thinking about people falling. They’re tears of laughter, but no one can tell the difference!

—

Ikati Black: Ooh! Are we messing with Scarlet?! *Sits in Scarlet Beetle’s lap and purrs*

Scarlet Beetle: Ikati, do you have to sit right there?

—

Aurore: The Scarlet Akumas are wreaking havoc across Paris! We gotta find a way to survive, and-

Cosette: Leave this to me! *Slams their notebook on the table and opens it to a few illustrations* I've been keeping track of everyone’s weakness. And I've figured out the best tactical strategy to overpower every one of them. Nath’s weakness is obvious.

Aurore: Uh-huh, uh-huh. Real obvious. And, um, ahem, what is it exactly?

Cosette: Everyone knows he twisted his ankle when he was a kid. If you keep him off balance, his injury will act up on him. *Flips to a page of them kicking Nathaniel’s ankle* So if we come across Evillustrator, I'll target it, and subdue him, and take his akuma, and save him, and remind him of it every time he tries to take the last cupcake at lunch! *Shows a drawing of Nathaniel handing her a cupcake*

Simon: Right. But could we circle back to your not-at-all-weird-and-very-detailed theories on our weaknesses?

Ismael: Yeah, not all of us will be as easy as a twisted ankle.

Cosette: Oh, you don't believe me. That's--That's fine. I'll just demonstrate. Simon’s weakness? *Pushes a laptop off of a desk which Simon quickly catches* tech.

Simon: Demon!

Cosette: Mireille- loud noises. Reshma- also loud noise. Aurore can't act to save her life. Also, EXTERME pigtail-envy with Stormy Weather. Ismael- crippling self-doubt mixed with overwhelming hubris.

Ismael: Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's, like, really personal compared to loud noises.

Denise: What about me?

Cosette: An inability to unleash your full strength due to your overwhelming fear of hurting the people you care about.

Denise: Some might say that's actually a positive quality.

Cosette: It's really not. Jean weakness... *Scrolling through a comments section* Terrible reviews of plays he was in.

Jean: NO! *Smacks the phone out of Cosette’s hand* You've spent a lot of time thinking about this, huh?

Cosette: Contingency plans are how you win, and we will win.

Lacey: Okay, we get it. They are easy to take down. You and your files don't have anything on real threats, like me. *Sees Cosette holding a picture of her brothers over a lit match* You monster!

—

Marinette: *After meeting Audrey* Chloé… *Holds her hands* You’re worth more than what you can give to other people. You deserve love, too.

—

Monarch: I’m like, the only one who’s not a hero.

—

Denise: I Am Brave, Strong, Loyal, And I Give Great Hugs!

—

Simon: What does it say?

Alix: *Reading her dad’s note* It says, “What did the ancient Greeks say when they burned dinner?” … “It was ruined.”

—

Cosette: So, we all pitched in, took Jean’s ration bars for a week, and made this! *Points to a cake*

Jean: I’m hungry, but celebrating your victory is worth it.

—

*After the Wish was made, it’s now the canon universe*

Lila: *Sits next to Nathaniel* Hi. I’m Lila.

Nathaniel: Oh, hey. Nathaniel.

Lila: … *Stares at him* You know, I don’t know what it is, but I do not like you.

—

Nathaniel: *Pulling Alix along* Come on, let’s get you outside. You need some air.

Alix: No, Nath, I don’t need air- *Suddenly, she and Nathaniel are on the roof of the school* … How… How did we get out here?

Nathaniel: We climbed up, like we always do. Don’t you remember?

Alix: I don’t know what’s happening to me. It’s like I’m losing my mind!

Nathaniel: You just need to relax.

Alix: Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. I’m fine. Everything’s fine. *Looks at Nathaniel, and for a brief second, he turns into Monarch* …

Nathaniel: Of course, I’m right. Everything’s perfect. I mean, unless you count HawkMoth running around, but, that’s why we got Ladybug and Chat Noir.

—

Lila: *Pouring some chloroform into a rag* In fact, Kim, I think I know some nice people who can help if you just-

Kim: *Quickly turns around and Lila hides the rag* Lila! You have to remember something! Tell me you remember! Everyone’s acting like things are perfect, except for you. Oh, and don’t get me started on Nath-

Lila: Nath?… Nathaniel?… *Has a flashback of Monarch striking her with his cane and a pink tambourine cracking*

Kim: … You do remember.

Lila: … N-No, I… *Has a flashback of Monarch snatching Scarlet Beetle and Ikati Black’s Miraculous* I mean, I don’t know. And, Nathaniel, he… Did he… Do something? *Looks around, startled* … What’s going on?! I keep forgetting things!… This is all wrong! How did we get here?

—

Marinette: *Having flashbacks of Monarch transforming back into Nathaniel, putting on the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous, and smirking* Nathaniel. It was Nathaniel! Nathaniel did this. He… He was dressed as Shadow Moth, he took… *Flashes back to Scarlet Beetle and Ikati Black unconscious on the ground transforming into him and Max* The Miraculous… He made the Wish?!

—

Kim: Oh, wow. This is gonna be a lot to explain. And it’s gonna sound a little weird, but I swear, it’s all true. *Sighs* … Reality is collapsing in on itself because of the Wish Nathaniel made back in a different reality. The Nathaniel here had the Butterfly Miraculous in the other world except you guy don’t remember because the Wish altered memories. It was pretty crazy. The Butterfly Miraculous is now in Hawkmoth’s hands, but I promise, it used to be Nathaniel’s, and Marc had the Peacock Miraculous, and I was fighting Nathaniel and Marc when they had the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculous, because I had the Ladybug Miraculous and I was fighting them alongside by partner, Ikati Black. I had the same powers as Ladybug, but a cooler suit, but Nathaniel- Monarch, used the Ladybug and Black Miraculous to make the wish, and I need Ladybug and Chat Noir to help re-do the wish and save all reality. *Takes a deep breath and starts panting*

Master Fu: I… Uh…

—

Marinette: *Grabs Austin T’s shoulders* Austin, I know what I’m about to say sounds crazy, but-

Austin T: Is this about the unstable portal caused by Nathaniel’s wish that’s slowly consuming and warping our reality?

Marinette: Now, you’re not gonna believe- What did you just say?

Austin T: Oh, I figured it all out a while ago while you guys were still freaking out about Nath and Marc being villains in another reality.

—

Marcelle: Nino! You aren’t the spy!

Nino: You don’t know that! It all makes sense. Who else could it be? *Thunder and lightning*

—

Cosette: I think I saw Marinette with Nino’s phone.

Nino: Wait, you guys have been here the whole time?

Cosette/Simon/Lacey: Uhh…

Cosette: *Offers a cupcake* Cupcake?

Sabrina: I can’t believe you read those two! Dark Mystery: The Mercury Case is my favorite.

Alya: Ugh, that one’s so predictable. I saw that twist coming a mile away.

Chloé: *Posing on the table*

Kim: Chloé. You weren’t even there.

Adrien: I told you how I took out 100- No, 150 guys, right?

Alya: *Groans*

Nino: You have to arrest me for everyone’s safety! Otherwise my evil alter-ego might do it again!

Max: Nino. Knock it off.

Chloé: *Posing with a ball and chain*

Kim: Still no! And put that back!

Max: *After interviewing Manon and Kiran, Mme. Bustier and Mendeleieve, and Denise and Simon who look a little irked after their date was interrupted* Not them. No. No.

Lacey: Okay, so, I think, like, maybe Scarlet Beetle did it!

Alix: Hey! We already questioned you!

Lacey: Oh yeah, I came back for the cupcakes!

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous #ao3fic #scarlet beetle & ikati black #she ra and the princesses of power #she-ra #mlb ocs #angst #crack #fluff #she ra

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leqclerc · 1 year

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You know I haven’t seen Stroll hate on that move. We ´ve seen replays. I feel like we quickly saw it was nobody’s fault.

But I mean there can always be some crazies on social media. But on that one most Charles fans were going through it, maybe going back to sleep (!) but really it was clear pretty fast that neither Charles nor Lance could have done anything more.

Being a fan of Charles, yeah we do like the predestined thing. Of course, if you are going around Tumblr and Twitter… I mean it’s pretty hardcore fans that are out there. More casual fans just watch the tv and maybe follow social media from afar on race week ends, liking a pic on IG, watching a thirst tram or two.

But I think we can call Charles out if he does something crazy. And I would say, we would have if he had done a Carlos. We have been so desperate. I think we all saw Imola as a big mistake. But also we moved on because he owned it, apologized to fans at least 100 times and there was a championship battle going on. France was another story because I think the balance of the car was weird.

Even Monaco 2021… we were pissed at Ferrari for the DNS. But we also knew Charles had overdone it in quali. But still it was amateur’s work on Ferrari.

We go from highs highs to low lows. But I think since Charles owns all his mistakes (and more than he should sometimes when it’s the team failing), what can we do ? We just cry we can’t be harsher than he is on himself ! 😂

I think media outlets are just desperate for clicks so they go around spreading these ~spicy think pieces or whatever. Autosport also had a lot to say about a driver whose race lasted approximately three corners through no fault of his own. I guess getting caught up in a lap one racing incident is now the ultimate way of gauging ability, not to mention one's emotional and mental state. 🥴

As for the online hate... you could replace Lance and Charles's names with any other drivers that were involved in an incident at any point and I'm sure you'd find a lot of online mudslinging among the fans too. Purposefully leaving spiteful comments under a driver's (or anyone else's, for that matter, but yknow, in this case it's a driver we're talking about) social media is never okay and I don't condone it under any circumstances, regardless of who is involved. I've said that before. But equally I'm not personally responsible for the online behaviour of hundreds if not thousands of people. But like you said, there will always be people who resort to that kind of behaviour. I don't stoop that low. They shouldn't either. It shouldn't reflect on the rest of us who are staying in our lane.

We point out his mistakes when it's warranted and, hell, as you said, the man himself has no qualms about holding himself accountable for his own actions. He's very vocal about his performance and he will admit when he feels he made a mistake, or could've done something better. He doesn't hide behind excuses. So the fact that he's getting so much slack, not just from online fanbases but more importantly public figures with media credentials for simply getting caught up in an unfortunate racing incident is just...

#replies #anonymous #discussions and predictions #long post #idk i personally don't like the il predestinato thing. it's way too much for any one person to live up to #the same people who coined the nickname and put him on that pedestal are now tearing him down #i get that it's a nice thing for the ~myth and the edits and all of that on the fandom side of things but man

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itztlislost · 11 months

Text

i quit my retail job

hey y'all, it has been months since I've been active. the last time i reposted something, tumblr immediately terminated my account. I was able to get it back after emailing customer service, which they apologized that it even happen because they don't even know why it happened. weird, but whatever.

anyways, I was inactive because my mental health was my priority. I cut of friends, stopped doing the things I liked and much more just to maintain a baseline of 'ok', which wasn't great considering my only interaction was people at my job of a cashier at a grocery store.

I ended up quitting when the workplace took a turn for the worst, both coworkers and management becoming toxic and I only had one work friend who kept their head on straight. I'm not going to say we never did anything wrong and that it was everyone else being assholes, that isnt true and I don't believe it was anyone but managements fault.

I'm not really sure what caused for this shift to happen, I was too focused on my own problems at the time before i eventually noticed. basically, everyone was in a bad mood, constantly. we all had problems with everyone and each other, we all wanted things and refused to compromise without complaints. The holiday season ended, hours were cut along with all this and management decided to play favorites. white employees got to keep their hours while the rest of us didn't even get the bare minimum of 20 hours, even if we were apart of the union. I know the managers have favorites, we all do, but they suddenly didn't care about being fair.

I was already fighting a losing battle with hr, all the while I was working 10 hour shifts three days into being of my 300ml Effexor and suffering the worst of my withdrawals at the customer service desk. I finally had a breakdown and meltdown, so bad I woke the next morning unable to speak or open my eyes because of the hours long of me screaming and sobbing the night before. do to how bad I was suffering, I called out sick and included all this information which i did not have to and shouldnt have. I genuinely care about my co workers and managers, I didnt want them to think I was faking being sick and I wanted them to know I had stuck it out for as long as I could all things considered. Instead of understanding, I got a huff in reply a dry 'are you sure? fine, ok'.

after that call I proceeded to spend the rest of the day and my days off screaming and crying while I waited for my doctor to fix whatever mistake set this off. that being said, it made me realize how little my work place cared. I built so many friendships with everyone at work that I tricked myself into thinking that this location and management could be any different than corporate or any other chain. Next day, I put in my two weeks and went to stay with my fiance while I got back on my meds.

I'm doing better now and figuring out a better path since I refuse to go back to working retail. the customers were actually the best part of the job imo, good and bad interactions alike. so yeah this was mainly a vent and also just a reminder to myself every time I come back here to remember how horrible that experience was. but hey, let it be a cautionary tale too i guess. Take your meds, call and make sure they get refilled a week or two before you're out bc trust me you may think they'll refill it fast but don't risk it. also retail sucks major doo doo, quit on the spot once you see any red flags. you're disposable to them, make them disposable to you.

#retail #customer service #toxic workplace #toxic work environment #mental health #mentalheathawareness #antidepressants #withdrawals

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soulsxng · 11 months

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Rules, tag 10 followers you want to get to know better!

Tagged by: @sansloii Tagging: steal it from me!

Name: Aya, Riah, Rai-rai. I noticed there's a lot of people that pronounce Aya like...(the letter) A-yah, but it's actually Ai-yah. Riah is Rai-ah.

Star Sign: Sagittarius sun, Libra moon, Cancer rising!

Height: 5'9" (I shrank a little, weh.)

Middle name: It's a secret c: I'll just say that it's a super common one.

Put your itunes/spotify/youtube on shuffle. What are the first 6 songs that popped up? (*puts the bigass master youtube playlist on shuffle and shrugs tbh*)

Mon.ster H.unter: World - V.aal Ha.zak theme (FalKKonE metal arrange)

La La Latch (Pentatonix)

The Reverberation Ensemble (StudioEIM)

Requiem (Chogakusei cover)

Kisaragi Station (nqrse)

Put Your Records On (Corinne Bailey Rae)

Ever had a poem or song written about you: I have, a few times! When we were still in elementary school, my little bro wrote a poem about me for class. And then I had a group of friends write a song about me when I was in high school (I had been dealing with The Big C at the time and was in the hospital, and they wrote it to cheer me up. It made me cry orz)

When was the last time you played air guitar: I'm more of a random dancing/wiggling randomly when music is playing type. Oh! Actually, it was a few weeks ago, because I was messing with my little sister while I was visiting her at work. That was an air banjo though, from an inside joke I have with my siblings.

Who is your celebrity crush?: I don't think I have one? That feels like a cop out though, so I'll say that I'm a big fan of Ol.an Ro.gers? He's hilarious. Me, my wife, and a few of our friends got to meet him last year actually, and it was a lot of fun!

What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?: FUCKIN-- okay so there's a lot of bad sounds out there, but one that has been a pet peeve of mine for a long time? People chewing with their mouth open, or sucking on their teeth a lot. OH, ALSO SUPER HIGH PITCHED NOISES. Like when movies and stuff play that like...tinnitus noise sometimes?

As for a sound I like, uh...it's sort of hard to explain, but sometimes when you hear people singing a harmony, if the voices line up perfectly, you can naturally hear what's called an overtone. I might have to look for a video or something, but essentially, you can hear a pitch the next octave up from one of the harmonized notes even though nobody is singing it. It's super cool, and gives me goosebumps every time. It occurs in instrumental harmonies too, iirc?

Do you believe in ghosts?: Kinda? I guess it depends on the circumstance.

How about aliens: I mean, yeah. I think it's scarier to believe that we're the only planet out there with intelligent life and whatnot on it, than to believe that there's others out there that we just haven't encountered, yet. Also, the odds of that are just astronomically low anyway.

Do you drive?: I do! Where I live, it'd be kind of impossible to not have either me or Kei able to do so. Plus I just enjoy it overall, most of the time.

if so have you ever crashed: Nope! I've been driving for like 13 years now (started a little before I turned 15, shhh), and haven't had any accidents.

What was the last book you read?: Uhhh I think it was MDZS book...5? Whichever one just released earlier this month. Otherwise, it was The Starless Crown.

Do you like the smell of gasoline: Diesal, nah. It makes me gag. Regular gas...eh. I'm indifferent to it. Unless it's rancid gasoline, in which case, it also makes me gag.

What was the last movie you saw?: ...I think it was the D&D movie? I'm gonna be honest, I watch very little tv, and very few movies.

What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?: I guess it would be from when I was in like 9th grade? I was sledding with some friends, and we were at this massive hill, having fun and being stupid. It was fine, but there was part of the hill that the snow plows liked to push snow from the parking lot into. So there was a big snow pile off to the side, and because I'm in a state known for the bitter cold, these piles might as well have been-- as I referred to them when I was a teenager-- small glaciers lmao.

Anyway, random fun fact, but the average sled speed on a decently sized hill is like 20mph. (can't remember where I learned that though so don't quote me on it) This hill was especially steep, so I want to say that I was going even faster than that, I got bumped into by one of my friends about 3/4ths of the way down, and slammed into the of one of these frozen slowplow piles full force before I could stop myself or roll off the sled. I hit the entire right side of my body, but mostly my thigh.

The resulting bruise was so severe (It was a bone-deep bruise over most of it. The doctor that saw me afterwards thought I had been in a car crash!), that if you were to touch my right thigh even now, you can still feel the muscular scarring it left. Yeah though, it's from like...just a little above my knee, to just below my hip.

Do you have any obsessions right now?: Probably Eld.en R.ing. I've been on and off of obsession with that since it came out, and obviously rn is one of those "on" periods! Singing is always an obsession of mine, same with dog stuff (specifically training/behavior/health related stuff), aaaand...worldbuilding stuff. Like the deep, almost scientific worldbuilding stuff that I probably won't have any reason to share with anyone else, but will randomly babble at Kei about while she's captive in my car and my mind has clung to one idea in particular.

#[What's she getting us into now? -ooc-]#(You can't tell that I'm in a talkative mood today at all jfc #Yeah as for my playlists though #I tend to have them a lot more separated #and then have one 'master' playlist that I shove everything from all of my playlists into #that I usually use when I can't figure out what kind of music my brain is itching for atm #there's a little bit of everything on there tbh)

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captainhowlreadyforboarding · 1 year

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15 Questions | 15 People

Thanks for the tag @goodomensandbadpress <333

Rules: Answer the questions and tag 15 people (or not because you're social circle on here is as small as mine lmao)

1. Are you named after anyone? Well I did take my name from the greek goddess Athena, so yeah. Kind of. 2. When was the last time you cried? oh like two days ago from I guess sensory overloud and physical icks. 3. Do you have kids? No, but I do plan on having some eventually! 4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Too much sometimes, I think. I do love me some sarcastic banter and I have been called iconic for my one liners, so luckily people know not to take my quips personally xD 5. What's the first thing you notice about people? Their style and aesthetic, probably. Also whether they are looking at me! It's kind of weird but I look around a room so often that when somebody is looking at me, I usually notice and stare back? So I guess I notice the way they gaze as well. 6. What's your eye colour? A mishmash of brown and green, depending how the light hits. They used to be more green when I was younger tho. 7. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings or I'll cry. I once watched a sad movie and I literally cried about it for an entire week. It was bad. 8. Any special talents? Not sure what's meant exactly by talents, but I am pretty good at acting/playing roles! Also I love handcrafting things and I am good at it (or at least persistent) but it's technically a learned skill. 9. Where were you born? In a hospital :) 10. What are your hobbies? Oh I have many!!! Handcrafting things (knitting, crocheting, sewing), writing, drawing, fashion, listening to music, planning my future en detail, learning languages... 11. Do you have any pets? No but I want these like prehistoric crabs? The tiny things children get in these science kits? Y'all know what I mean or is this solely a thing where I live? 12. What sports do you play/have played? I used to swim and do ballet for over 10 years, as well as do karate for a few and I've always loved sport! But unfortunately my disabilities got worse and I had to stop doing these sports, and it's really hard to start again, because everytime I start to get the motivation the pain flares up again or something, leaving me demotivated for another long period of time. It's also awful that people perceive me as being very unathletic, not sporty, because that's actually not true, I love doing sports! However, I feel like no one believes me because in school. I used to always complain about PE and stuff, because I was being discriminated against for being disabled, which made me miserable looking at sports, so all my friends who witnessed that and also later on me struggling with moving caused everyone to adapt the mindset that I cannot do sports, will not do sports and hate sports, which hurts on a personal level actually. Yeah, sports is a complicated topic with me. 13. How tall are you? Like 5'1. Yeah it's small and I will not grow anymore. But I actually don't really mind. Just think it's funny that I'm smaller than pre-serum Steve Rogers. 14. Favourite Subject at school? German and English for the win! Theater as well though. 15. Dream job? To become a doctor, and I'm actually currently preparing for a kind of entrance exam!

So I knoow you're supposed to tag 15 people, but I'm keeping the numbers quite small. Also tagging people I know from my main blog, so yeah, @nelabelievesindragons and @madelineorionswan if y'all want to answer the questions, feel free!

#ask game #disability #theny talks nonsense

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sortasirius · 1 year

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Absolutely gutwrenching. Spoilers for TLOU Episode 8

Opening with the lodge was sick of them

Seeing the aftermath of Joel killing that guy is exactly what they should do but also brings me nothing but stomach pain

Feeling literally nothing but dread as Ellie walks around in the woods

I wish she had gotten the rabbit but at the same time it was very funny that she face planted instead, just another cool change from game Ellie to show Ellie

Her trying to change her voice to be more intimidating once again I would die for her

The second they started interacting I felt ill Scott Shepherd is an incredible actor and brought a new dimension to Nolan's already horrifically scary David

TROY I WISH IT DIDN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY

"Where the fuck do I put this" YES I LOVE THAT THEY ADDED THIS REALISTICALLY ELLIE WOULD HAVE NO IDEA!!

So glad they kept that shot of her lying down right next to him, it always makes me crying and Pedro and Bella made it worse somehow

So I think it's an interesting question...do a lot of these people know that they're often eating human meat? Because it seemed like a lie they're telling most of them.

Revenge quest mention again....PART II IS COMING!

David just slapping that girl in the face and then telling her he's her father?????? JAIL

This section has always been so fucking scary and this is no exception

RIP Callus my man

It's way scarier to have them walking around the house and have Joel just laying there

I was fully screaming "GET UP GET UP!!"

That dude's death was so fucking brutal oh my god

I think it's great that they made her more scared, it fits this Ellie a lot better

Yeah that was my BOY Joel right there, PERFECT adaptation of one of the most brutal (and best) scenes in the game

An even scarier way for her to find out what they are. Cool thanks.

THEY AREN'T TELLING THEM WHAT THEY'RE EATING WHICH IS SO SO SO FUCKED

"You have a violent heart, and I should know. I've always had a violent heart."

THIS IS WORSE. THIS IS WORSE THAN THE GAME.

THEY KEPT HER LINE THANK U CRAIG AND NEIL

Her backpack I can't take this

Bella is so fucking amazing. They're such a perfect Ellie.

David's more overt aggression and obvious desire for Ellie is...really sickening. Like it's obvious in the game. We know it. But to see it like this, to see it in his eyes, in the way he looks at her, the way he talks. It's beyond words.

The Scene made me feel legitimately ill. Like sick to my stomach.

"Fighting is the part I like most" if Ellie hadn't killed him, I sure as hell would have,

They added so much to that sequence, and it made it So Much Worse.

Bella...Bella. Bella. Bella. Bella.

Absolutely gutting. Thank you once again to every single person that has given me this adaptation.

I wish I could put into words, I wish I could put what this show is to me into words. But I can't. I can't even describe it.

Next week is the last. I have some hunches. We'll see if they're right:

I think we get a glimpse (not meet, but get a glimpse) of Abby. I think they've cast Owen and Mel and maybe even Manny. We'll obviously see Jerry. And I can't fucking wait.

#spoilers #tlou hbo #liveblog

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cwarscars · 1 year

Note

Beep, beep. I've came with some kind of positivity and hopefully it will help in some way. I know it is hard right now to deal with everything, especially dealing with a death of a family. You already know this by now, but just know you go at your own pace. Don't force yourself to chat if you aren't feeling up to it. Don't force yourself to reply if you can't have the energy or heart to do so. Many of us, including myself, are happy to have you around and is happy to have you exist. At the same time, while I can't talk for everyone (and I am sure they may agree), we also want you to take care of yourself. <3

It's okay to be down in the dumps for a while. Grieving is never easy and doesn't have a linear timeline. Some days you will be okay. Other days you aren't. Don't push yourself to be okay if you aren't. A reminder that I am always here if you need anything. Just a message away. Or if you need any sort of distractions or anything I could do to help, I am happy to help out.

(( thank you for this, beck - i really debated whether to post this or just keep it close but i can save it in my happy tag to come back to.

i can't lie - it's been hard, probably harder than i imagined. at first, i kind of took everything in my stride. like my dumbass muses, i have sort of a 'don't show weakness' thing going irl but it bites me in the ass a lot. when things happened, i was the one who had to inform half of my family, later that day i saw him, gone. at the time, i thought i could handle it but now i keep thinking back and it really sucks.

it's been over two weeks & i truly think i feel worse now than i did then. it's a real mix of emotions that i wont go too much into but tumblr wise - i've felt guilty not being as enthusiastic or active. writing's been harder ( though i did get my drafts done, so that's something at least! ) but yeah, it's been tough in some respects. people i spoke to a lot have kind of dipped from talking to me and i'm taking it personally. others, i dont expect to know what to say but i resent myself for being weird or quiet to them

but / enough of me moaning, i think aside from being frank - what i wanted to say is thank you for this. truly. i know it doesn't mean much simply saying a thank you, but i really mean it from my heart. i read this when you initially sent it and it made me cry. and for once in the last few weeks, not in a bad way. it just eased things for me a little. you're such a kind and positive person to have around & i'm grateful for your attitude and your kindness. even going out of your way to send me this was incredibly sweet - it means more to me than you probably know. i'm incredibly appreciative to you reaching out & even simply seeing vasco and your love for him on my dash has been bringing a little smile to my face while browsing, so don't worry there about providing distraction, heh.

i know i keep saying it but - thank you again. this was really kind of you. you're wonderful. ♥ ))

#(foreversave)#(answered)#(ooc)#love ya friend <3

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seconddoubt · 1 year

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tagged by asia @mickgaydolenz and raya @vintagecocacolainthesun, thank you so much!!! <3

rules: answer the questions and tag fifteen mutuals

1. are you named after anyone?

nope

2. when was the last time you cried?

this morning when i was journaling, i think if you've followed me for some time, like over a week, it's a well known fact that i'm a cry baby, i cry almost every day either from music or reading or some movie or something good happening to me or a friend, or something bad happening to me or a friend

3. do you have kids?

nope. and i for sure will never have biological kids, and pretty likely not kids in any capacity ever.

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

yeah, which is funny 'cause i often have trouble knowing when someone else does, but i can't stop meself

5. what's the first thing you notice about people?

i notice clothes and hairstyle long before i start to actually conceptualise someone's face in my mind, i know this because if a new acquaintance or someone i don't see too often changes their hair or wear something completely different from what i've seen them in i do not recognise them anymore, this has lead to some awkward situations.

6. what's your eye colour?

very dark brown

7. scary movies or happy endings?

scary movies ! but i like a happy ending too

8. any special talents?

i can sound like a dove

9. where were you born?

sweden

10. what are your hobbies?

okay so the only one i can consider consistent, like it has never wavered, is listening to music, and i really mean just listening to music, i rarely put on an album to have it going in the background, i will sit down, usually on the floor and listen and often read the lyrics while doing so, but i also listen to music on my walks.

i would have considered reading and writing consistent too but last year was fucked and i barely wrote a single word that wasn't for school and i read a total of like 5 books, most of them also for school so that was shit, but i am getting back into it now, but it's still heavier than it has been in many years to do so.

and i like creating stuff but what changes all the time, sometimes drawing, sometimes painting, or sculpting, sewing, embroidering, knitting, crocheting, i made a collage yesterday.

11. have you any pets?

no :c

12. what sports do you play/have played?

did horseback riding when i was very young, then i've just danced, which i don't really consider a sport, i guess competitive dancing is, but what i did felt more like self-expression with the added bonus of strength and flexibility, rather than sport,tho idk really what the definition of "sport" is.

13. how tall are you?

155cm

14. favourite subject in school?

maths, physics and languages

15. dream job?

i don't dream of labour. i would actually love to do online archiving of old texts to preserve them for the future, but most of that work is pro bono so i would have to do that outside of a job and that just ain't gonna happen. i am actually interested in translating literature, i am currently looking into freelance opportunities for that.

it said to tag 15 ppl but today i am once again scared and don't wanna bother anyone, so i will not be doing that, but as always i would love for you to consider yourself tagged by me if you see this and want to do it!!!!

#tagged

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purplesurveys · 4 months

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1790

Is there a gang problem in your area? Not that I know of. If there were any it would be super underground.

Do you make your Starbucks order more complicated if it isn't busy? No. The extent to which you could customize your drinks at that place scares and overwhelms me, lmao. I've always just gotten whatever's on the menu.

Do you consider airports to be emotional places? Yes, I've always held a quiet resentment towards airports because sending off my dad, who works abroad, has been a regular occurence in my life since I was 2. I've never felt nice in them, even when I'm already the one traveling, because the bitter goodbyes are all I remember.

Where do you need to be? Nooooooooooofuckingwhere. I'm happy to be home and holed up in my room. I've been out all week for Christmas parties and errands.

Would you date an already attached person? No.

When you marry, will you wear white? Yeah, assuming that happens to me.

What vaccine that you've received hurt the most? All injections hurt the same to me – it's the side effects that vary. So far the Covid vaccines and boosters have sucked the most.

Do you ever feel like you're being watched? I mean sure, but it's never been like a stalker-type situation. It's fairly easy to find myself in situations where I'm watched, like when I'm presenting a Powerpoint to a whole room.

What will it take to make or break this day for you? My day's already made because I got a box of macarons from a frequent work supplier today. As far as break, idk. There's loads of bad news I could possibly get.

Would you give up a dream for someone you loved? I was willing to in the past, and looking deep down I don't think that has changed. I love deeply. I can always find ways to make the most out of life, and I think the only time I would back out is if our values or directions in life are entirely different and stand no chance of being reconciled in any shape or form whatsoever.

Could you date someone who's only been your friend for a long time? I did. Prior friendships are what I prefer in relationships too.

Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly? I've only ever been in a monogamous relationship. It's what I prefer as a setup, but generally I don't date anymore.

Are you afraid to ask people out on dates? It's not that I'm afraid. I'm just not interested.

Do you think it's better to look for love or let it find you? I let things happen naturally.

Have you ever found yourself worrying about commitment? Never been a problem for me.

Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? Preferably not but if I'm really into the person, I think it's something I'm willing to try. I'm nowhere near ready to be a stepmom, but no one ever really is.

Have you ever learned an important lesson as a result of a break up? Yeah. I think that's part of the role of breakups...

Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than three months of no communication? Nopes, it was more the opposite for me. I kept in touch for the next three months thinking things had a chance of changing, then realized how unhealthy it was for me so I promptly cut off all lines of communication with them when the new year rolled in.

Do you or would you ever wear fake eyelashes? I did just once, realized how much I hated being made up like that, removed them before the event was even over, and never wore them again.

Do you think that smaller breeds of dogs are cuter than big ones? I like all dogs but I will say I like bigger dogs a teeny weeny bit more.

When was the last time you slept in a tent? Two years ago.

What brand of make-up do you prefer to use? I don't follow makeup brands.

Do you have any siblings and if so, what're they like? Nina is very independent, naturally defensive (almost to a fault), but also sensitive. We all kind of tiptoe around her since she can cry about anything. She's incredibly artistic and resourceful and is reliable in many situations. I don't know much about my brother apart from him liking K-pop girl groups and having a sharp memory. He doesn't show much of a personality beyond those two things.

What was the last television show that you sat and watched multiple episodes of? Gyeongsong Creature.

Is there anything significant happening this month? It's Bea's last working day on the 31st and after that I'll be pretty much left to my own devices with an entire team to run.

When was the last time you plucked your eyebrows? I don't do that.

Do you have any chronic pain? No.

When was the last time you had a Poptart? Either a year or two ago. Can't remember. I don't have them often.

Do you like hot chocolate? Not in general. There's only one variant of hot chocolate I'd get on the regular, and that's a local restaurant's San Gines hot chocolate.

Who is your best guy friend? Hans, if any.

What’s your favorite Michael Jackson song? Either Smooth Criminal or Bad.

Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans from? I don't even remember. I've had it for so long as my fave and I refuse to throw it out hahaha. Maybe at an ukay?

When was the last time you got your hair done professionally? A couple of months ago when I got another dye job.

Do you like TGI Fridays? I think it's extremely overpriced and that automatically makes me not a fan. Why pay triple the price for a plate of wings?

Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? Nope, I just shave them.

Have you ever read anything by Edgar Allen Poe? I don't think I have.

When was the last time it rained where you live? Last night the rain was pretty strong! I think we have a typhoon.

Do you like horses? They're okay, but I'm not attached to them like some people would be.

What are your grandfathers’ names? I'll only share their nicknames, which are Jun and Boy.

Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Yes. I've held one.

Do you know anyone that has been held hostage before? Only by association, but my sister's boss from when she was interning.

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