#but I feel relief

[akindplace]

I learned from an extremely young age that love was conditional, that I was always supposed to earn it, but never did because I never did anything well enough, and I was always set up for failure like that. And I knew other people who had love got it because they were good enough, and I thought I had no worth because I could never be good enough to earn that conditional love. And I never was good enough back then. I know now that, in fact, I am good enough. I shouldn't have to burn myself out, to put up with the intolerable, I shouldn't feel like I can't say "no" to avoid conflicts, I don't have to be accept hurtful behavior so others can feel comfortable enough to love me! I can be loved for who I am, right here, right now, without being of use to anyone, because I am not something to use, I am not a doll, I am not a manic pixie dream girl, it is not my job to make someone find their own path to a happy and fulfilled life. I should be prioritizing fulfilling my own life without caring about what others think.

This is both a breakthrough and a breakdown. And then it becomes an epiphany. I am a capable person. And I am older now and I can understand that no one should have to earn love, ever. I don't have to keep living this way - so I won't.

I can do what I enjoy, I can live my honest life, I can be authentic and no longer be afraid of loving relationships. I will keep allowing myself to receive love. I will see that my life reflects how much love my heart can have: an insurmountable amount.

Love for all things, myself included.

#personal #original writing #i am very much crying yes #but I feel relief #self compassion #self realization #self assurance #breakthrough #epiphany #self-acceptance #self-love #cw toxic relationship #okay to reblog

[jakeperalta]

letting celebrities think they can and should "use their platform" to speak on all current events and political issues regardless of how educated they are on them was a grave mistake

#i honestly think that's why half of these celebrities are just sharing around these same few wishy washy unhelpful statements #at this point it's a relief when i open an instagram story and it's just a celebrity posting about their regular stuff #like good thank you feel free to just be quiet #or just share some fundraising links if you feel a need to be helpful #but like ultimately if you have a platform of many thousands/millions #then frankly it is your responsibility to make sure what you are sharing is accurate and useful #and not just posting for the sake of posting #but instead somehow we're at the point where the more followers you have the more you are expected to just post something anything #talking

[mothprincess]

i love sleeping early. it’s like “bye, fucking world. can’t wait to be warm and cozy, instead”

#thoughts #i’ve been anxious all week #so getting in bed is a relief #it feels like i can forgive myself then

[vaguely-concerned]

sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go

#the locked tomb #harrowhark nonagesimus #john gaius #harrow the ninth #this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL #this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships #(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think #the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real #but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed) #there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone? #yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't) #the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god #when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care #(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution) #and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on #it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there #while john is -- well he sure is being john huh #this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end #(with john slam dunked right into hell that is) #it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up #john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too

[gardenofnoah]

“you’re going to hurt yourself like that, my love.”

you startle at the voice over you, having been nearly asleep.

“—uh?”

you turn your head to see Nanami looming over your side of the bed. if you were fully conscious, you would see the tiny look of mischief in his eyes as they roam your body, but you’re not, so you take it as his tendency to mother hen you.

and then he’s pushing you to the middle of the bed despite your whining, climbing in beside you. you try to settle in and find you’re still being moved—he’s on his back, shuffling himself down the bed and pulling one of your legs over his chest. you feel him turn his face into your belly in a move that feels suspiciously like nuzzling.

“what’re y’doin,” you slur, a little petulant at being woken up like this, despite it being well past the time you meant to rejoin the living and despite your own desire to seek out the warmth he’s emitting next to you.

“you’re going to hurt your hip, laying like that,” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. he runs a hand up the back of your thigh and over your hip, and you sigh a little bit, comforted by the feeling of him.

“i don’t know how you sleep like that,” he continues, absentmindedly dragging his fingers over your skin, making you shiver every now and then.

“feels good,” you grumble, face shoved into the pillow. talking about your bizarre sleeping position and maybe also the way the rough pads of his fingers leave a trail of warmth in their wake. you think you hear him chuckle softly, and you feel him press a kiss to the skin of your belly, right above the hem of your sleep shorts.

it’s soft, chaste—and then it’s not, and you suck in a breath when you feel him kiss you there again, feeling the tip of his tongue drag along the skin that stretches over your hip bone.

and evidently he hears your sharp inhale, because you feel a strong arm sneak around your lower back, pulling you closer to him.

“was still sleeping, you know,” but it’s lost all of its bite and you’re a little breathless now, fixated on the way his free hand slides up the back of your thigh to brush over the sensitive spot just under the curve of your ass.

“go to sleep then,” he says into the soft of your belly, pressing another kiss, opening his mouth a little wider to catch the skin of it between his teeth. he’s turned into you now, and despite yourself, you drag your leg up from his chest so it’s over his shoulder.

he moves to rest his head against your thigh that’s trapped underneath him, and distantly you think that it is more comfortable like this— his head squeezed between your legs having alleviated some of the pressure against your hip from laying on your side. that thought quickly becomes muddled in your head when you feel him latch on to the skin of your inner thigh that rests against his face.

you whine, hips bucking weakly as you squirm under tongue and teeth—both leaning into and trying to get away from the sting of his bite.

“my sweet love,” he coos, running his tongue over the fresh bruise, placating you. you shiver, pressing your face further into the pillow to try to breathe—to ground yourself despite the heat that curls up your spine. he stops, then, and you peak down at him to find that he’s staring back up at you.

“hi,” you whisper, fighting another shudder at the way his lips pull at the corners into a smirk that looks absolutely sinful on him.

“good morning,” he drawls, deep and far too awake. he rests his chin in the space between your hips, pressing a quick kiss above your pubic bone. your hips buck toward him a tiny bit, and his smirk widens when he feels it.

you bring a hand down to run it through his hair, tangling in the blond strands and scratching at his scalp. he closes his eyes and hums, deep in his chest, nuzzling into your thigh. it makes you smile, and it makes you ache.

“want you, ken,” you murmur, squeezing him gently between your thighs and reveling in the groan he lets out.

“i know, sweetheart,” he coos, hands coming up again to grope whatever skin he can reach and pressing a tiny kiss through your shorts, “i can smell you.”

#i started writing this and then decided i wanted to stop #i am a side sleeper and it causes me much pain and strife but i feel that the solution is a large muscular man between my legs #just for pain relief purposes of course #now that i think of it. this is the second nanamin pain relief fic i’ve written #so i am projecting and you’ll all have to deal with that #we’ll call this a little milestone post #700 of you! that’s nuts! #nanami #nanami kento #jjk nanami #nanamin #nanami fluff #nanami smut #jjk fluff #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen #nanami kento fluff #nanami kento smut #nanamin it’s the little things #bwritesthings

[sixoclockuty]

the nuances of being alive when you aren’t meant to be

#undertale #undertale yellow #axis uty #uty axis #axis model 014 #undertale yellow comic #ceroba ketsukane #ceroba uty #uty ceroba #uty clover #clover uty #art #my art #artists on tumblr #digital art #uty #i spent forever on this oh my god …. #i almost regret full coloring this but i think it’s nice #spent several hours on this !!! #i love axis #go robot boy go! have issues with your identity and emotion!! #he’s such a comic relief character but he’s just. oh freaking mentally ill robot who isn’t even meant to feel that much

[lyralit]

reminder:

you're allowed to be proud of your accomplishments.

you're allowed to think you're pretty, or smart, or funny.

you're allowed to be good at things.

you're allowed to voice your opinion.

you're allowed to do whatever makes you feel comfortable.

you're allowed to not know what you want to do.

you're allowed to change your mind.

you're allowed to want things.

you're allowed to cry and break down.

you're allowed to be disappointed when things don't go your way.

you're allowed to love the way you love.

you're allowed to dream.

#story time #I worked all year last year to get the top honours group prize at for my year #and I got it! #and the rush of relief / satisfaction #from knowing I worked hard from it #was just as strong as feeling it was a mistake #remind yourselves it's not a mistake #you can work hard #and you can do well #and sometimes it doesn't work out #but celebrate when it does #<3 #lovely people <3

[fumifooms]

Homegrown

Thistle and Delgal - Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui

^ Fernando Pessoa / Killing Flies, Michael Dickman / A Brother Named Gethsemane, Natalie Diaz / Antigonick, Anne Carson v Oats We Sow, Gregory and the Hawk

#Dungeon meshi #spoilers #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #thistle #sissel #thistle dungeon meshi #web weaving #web weave #Just in case for sake of transparency: in the ‘what a relief everyone’s safe’ panel I erased a bit of dialogue he originally said #‘What a relief everyone’s BODY IS safe’ #But yk. Delusions angst. Dinner table Thistle imagery you are famous to me #delicious in dungeon #Umm go check out my Thistle & Falin fic on ao3 called Slivers maybe idk #Sometimes it does feel like Thistle has an age regression through the manga it’s interesting. Kui what were you cooking #I am a firm believer that Thistle’s an adult and that that doesn’t take anything away from his narrative tho. #He’s the older brother here & that’s the whole point. God dunmeshi family narratives I love youuu #Thistles are a weed… Idk the garden theme for him works great imo. Make that dungeoneum manage that kingdom like an ecosystem

[strawbbz]

His charming looks and silly attitude have captivated me

#my adventures with superman #maws #maws jimmy olsen #jimmy olsen #superman #clark kent #lois lane #maws clark kent #maws lois lane #superman fanart #my adventures with superman fanart #maws fanart #the moment it was apparent that he was comedic relief it was so over for me #i am not immune to comedic relief #hes so cute and funny #i want him #also i might be crazy for this but he legitimately feels Doomed #like idk anything about superman but it feels like something Bad is going to happen to this dude soon #my adventures with superman jimmy olsen

[seawherethesunsets]

QUEEN OF TEARS (2024)

#queen of tears #kdramaedit #kdramadaily #asiandramanet #userdramas #bysya #qotedit #ep 14 #top tier #i could feel the panic and relief and this is sooo heartbreaking #him dropping on the floor goodness

[puppyeared]

happy valentines day <3 i wanted to do more, but sadly i only had enough time to complete these two

please also don't forget Rafah is under attack and urgently needs help. you can buy esims, check the BDS boycott list, click the daily donation button and email your representatives (USA).

there will also be a global strike february 18 - 24.

#the proceeds from the daily button goes to UNRWA but id also recommend palestine childrens relief fund & red crescent #theyre doing on the ground work but i havent heard if theyre able to reach people in Rafah so ive linked other resources for now #im also trying to see if i can make time to do drawings for esims since i cant send money myself #i have my reading week in 2 weeks so i can try to do as much as i can while managing school and energy levels #im really sorry to put this on my valentines day post but it feels too dismissive to leave it on its own post where it wont be seen #my art #myart #my oc #oc #valentines day #sleight #augusta #fur #furry #furry art #doodles #sona #puppysona #palestine #free palestine #bright colors #cw bright colors #eyestrain #cw eyestrain #eye strain

[athenagranted]

the way i would pay for oliver to write meta about buck's character

#like. he Gets it. i've been thinking about buck in this ep for five days straight and he said it better in one sentence than any paragraph #i could ever come up with #people are arguing over whether buck #acted the way he did bc he wanted tommy's attention or eddie's attention or bc he was feeling left out or whatever but i don't think it's #any one thing i think it was just a general feeling of Wrongness when tommy showed up borne from thirty years of repressing his sexuality #and he tried to rationalize it as jealousy or whatever and worked through the fact that his behavior was completely unreasonable but #it wasn't until tommy kissed him that all of the rage that was trapped inside him was allowed to escape bc he finally had a name for it #he's been turning over parts of himself for years trying to find that final piece and getting more and more upset when it eludes him #n this kiss was the kind of cathartic relief that he so desperately needed bc it allowed him to understand what's been missing #anyway. oliver stark i love you so much i'm so grateful you play buck #buck #rae.txt #911

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Why would you—That's not—I just wanted to ask for help, why did you have to go and make it awkward???

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #xue yang #Its such a relief to not have to draw so many characters once again. #Redrawing the specific font from the English translated mdzs books was surprisingly fun! #Maybe I'm alone in this...but I think characters switching to a different font of speech for *emphasis* is peak comedy #you can't communicate voice changes of sound very well in non audio forms so this is the best I can do. #Anyways...rip Xue Yang. You finally meet your idol and he brushes you off #Rather— he doesn't live up to the expectations you built in your head #Kind of an on going issue there Jester (I refuse to call him king or sir) #XY is constantly making people out to be the versions he needed them to be to feel justified in his actions #but struggles to pivot when confronted with the fact that these ppl are *more* than just one surface reading! #wwx doesn't actually think xy is flirting. He's just tired of all the fake fans + wants to get out of this convo. #button mashing the A button to skip the unskippable cutscene #Lan Wangji is in the next comic btw. I've missed him dearly. I'm sorry he's been gone so long </3 #edit: poorly spelt MDZS strikes again. This is why I need more time to write my comics. So I can actually proofread B*( #edit2: I cast 'Power of Technology' and fixed my error. Everyone reblog this version instead please

[errorno4o4]

Me 4 days ago: "Jeez, the Ultrakill community is insane, why tf are they like this"

Me now:

#ultrakill #gabv1el #gabriel ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #what happened to me #i feel like gabriel in act 2 #what is this feeling #this... relief #?

[stuckinapril]

every time i walk into my local library i make sure to look at the receptionists with big wet eyes before heading to my corner to study bc i really want them to hire me as a part-time aide

#not even bc i need the money like it would just be so good for my mental health #extra cash would be nice but i also just like existing there #i don't need another thing on my plate but this feels like anxiety relief more than anything #esp bc w all my pre-med stuff sometimes i feel guilty for reading recreationally. this would force me to be somewhere i love to be #i WANT to be around books for 6 hours at a time. stacking. shelving. cleaning those precious books #i will burst into tears if they don't let me #i literally know the dewey decimal system by heart i'm perfect for this #p

[fanfic-gremlin-ft-trauma]

they won :)

#sokka and katara #sokka and katara fanart #atla #atla fanart #water hazard siblings #there’s just so much I have to say about these two #but I’ll stay context specific #something about the fact that Sokka and Katara both won their respective battles #not even knowing whether the other is alive #not knowing if they’d lost another family member #but when they see each other all injuries are forgotten #they run even though they’re hurt and tired #the hug they share is one of relief #they don’t have to say anything because the unspoken #‘thank spirits you’re alive. thank spirits I didn’t have to lose another person.’ #is clear to both of them #I have a lot of feelings okay