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dalamjisung · 4 years

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nobody else ❊ mark tuan

word count: 6341

genre: angst, fluffy ending

pairing: reader x mark tuan

description: He saw something in you. You saw that same something in him.

[Trigger Warning: this story has a brief mention of psychological manipulation and psychological abuse.]

“Hey Y/N!”

“Y/N! How was your summer?”

“Looking good, Y/N!”

You laugh, making your way to the coffee shop to meet your friends. Waving and smiling back, you can’t help but remember last semester, when barely five people knew who you were. Safe to say, things are more interesting now. No one really knows what happened over the summer, but you came back renewed; new hair, new clothes, new person. You suddenly started joking more, talking more, laughing more. Some speculate you got a boyfriend, but most boys refuse to believe that. Others say you traveled the world, and even you laughed when you heard that. You wish you had the money to travel the world.

It’s been almost a month now, and you went from nobody to the girl everyone wants to know. Your friends laugh, not giving it much attention, and you let them; it’s not like they need to know, anyways. Hyejin and Byulyi asked for a while, but after so many failed attempts, they just gave up like everybody else. There’s no point in asking if you’re not ready to tell them… so they just let you be.

“Y/N!”

You walk in the shop, relieved to see your girls. The thing about suddenly being known from one day to the next is that people know your name, but they don’t know you; so most of the time you hear someone calling you, it’s because they want something– a favor, your notes, an information. In a month you became the go-to girl for small things like that, and although it is a little tiring, you didn’t really care. People know you exist now. They remember you.

And yet, hearing your name coming from Hyejin’s mouth is like a breath of fresh air– every time.

“How are you, my love?” She hugs you tightly and you feel like you could cry. “You have blue paint in your hair.”

“Oh,” You laugh, tying your hair back in a ponytail, trying to hide the mess you made during class. “I’m good, babes. How are you?”

“Good now that you’re here,” She winks and you sit down next to her.

“Yah, this way I’m going to get jealous,” Wheein complains, moving to sit next to you, too. She drapes one arm around your shoulders and pulls you to her. “You’re my love, too.”

“Ah, it’s okay,” You kiss her cheek. “There’s love for everybody, right here.” You point to your heart, laughing as both of then raise their eyebrows.

“Oh, we know,” Hyejin says. “You’ve been giving it out to everyone now.”

“It was her summer glow-up,” Wheein jokes. “Everyone wants a piece of our Y/N, now. We have to protect her, Hyejin-ah.”

“You guys are crazy,” You say, drinking from Wheein’s coffee. “And that’s why I love you.”

“We love you too–“

“Y/N!”

Your body instantly tenses once you hear the high pitched voice calling out for you. Sighing, you turn around and look for her– Sumi.

“Hey,” You say, trying to use all the excitement in your body. It isn’t much. “How are you doing, Sum–“

“I need a favor.”

“Of course you do,” Wheein scoffs. “When don’t you need a favor?”

“Aish, that’s not true,” Sumi chuckles shamelessly. “Y/N and I are friends, aren’t we?”

Do it. Just do it, Y/N, you think to yourself, nodding at her.

“What’s up?”

“Mark broke up with his girlfriend,” She whispers, as if it is a secret.

You know that already. It was the talk of the campus for about a week when you came back, but then the focus quickly changed to you, and that’s when you met Han Sumi. The stereotype of a ‘school princess,’ she was quick to understand that if she was nice, you’d be nice too, and since then, asking for favors is all she does. You might’ve been quiet before, but every single student knows about Sumi obsession with Mark Tuan; she’s been trying to get with him ever since freshman year and now that he’s available, you’re guessing she’s back on her game.

“No way… really?” You feign surprise. “Hadn’t heard!”

“It’s true!” She squeals in happiness. “Minho told Sunwoo and he told Juyeon who told me! Mark is single again!”

“That’s… something,” You mumble, trying to exclude yourself from this inevitable situation.

“Definitely,” She winks. “So can I count on you?”

“M-me?” You are actually surprised, this time. “I’m sorry Sumi, but I don’t know Mark…”

“Impossible,” She laughs. “You know everyone.”

“Not everyone,” You sigh. “I really never talked to Mark before, Sumi.”

“Hm,” She frowns. “Really?”

“Yeah…”

“But you know Jackson, right?”

You’re doomed.

“Yeah, but–“

“Then ask Jackson to help me!”

“Why don’t you ask him yourself?” Hyejin scowls at her. “Y/N has better things to do then tending to your failed love life.”

“Look who’s talking, I bet you’re only friends with her because you want som–“

“Yah!”

Wheein holds Hyejin by the arms, pulling her back down.

“Sure, I’ll try and talk to Jackson,” You say, quickly trying to make her go away. “I can’t promise anything, though.”

“Ah, I knew I could count on you!” Sumi hugs you. “I’ll see you later then!”

“Yeah, yeah, goodbye,” You chuckle uncomfortably and watch her leave, turning to your raging friend. “Are you insane?!”

“I’m going to kill her,” Hyejin promises, and you shiver, the intensity in her voice getting to you. “I promise you, one day, I’ll drag her by her fake hair and–“

“Okay, okay, we get it,” Wheein rolls her eyes. “You’ll destroy her blah blah blah.”

“NO,” Hyejin shouts, clearly frustrates. “It’s not just ‘blah blah blah.’ This drives me insane! People coming over to ask Y/N for favors and then pointing fingers at us. I’ve known her since middle school and it kills me that I have no clue what the fuck happened this summer. It kills me to have to watch you let yourself be used like this.”

“Hyejin-ah–“

“I’ll see you guys later.”

She marches out the door before you can say anything, and you understand why– it must be really frustrating to be kept in the dark by your best friend. She is upset, you know that much; but telling her everything would only upset her further, and you don’t see a need for that.

Ever since you guys started hanging out Wheein and Hyejin were the extroverted, confident ones. They always protected you from anyone with ill-intentions. It’s not that they think you’re weak, but they rather protect you then watch you suffer.

Ah, you think to yourself, allowing your head to fall on your hands in defeat. You can’t protect me from this, Hyejin-ah…

“It’s alright,” Wheein pats your back affectionately. “You know how protective she is. She’ll call in an hour or two and everything will be okay.”

“Will it be okay, though?” You whisper to yourself. “I’m not sure it will…”

“Hey, don’t say that; Hyejin loves you more than anything in the world.”

“And I love her,” You mumble, sensing the guilty feeling crawling back through your body. “I will be okay. I have to.”

“Wha–“

“I gotta go, Wheein-ah,” You smile widely, and the suddenness of it all leaves your friend startled. “Love you!”

Grabbing your bag, you run out the door, to the only place you think he could be.

“Jackson Wang,” You mumble to yourself. “You’re the only one that can help me now.”

———————————

Just as you thought, there he is. Star athlete Jackson Wang could always, at all times, be found at the basketball court. Your relationship with him, weirdly enough, began before this summer. He found you crying your eyes out at the benches and approached you to make sure you were alright. After talking for a while, he took you to a nearby dinner and bought a milkshake in exchange for knowing what happened; so you told him. It had been a rough day and things at home weren’t the best, so you decided to cry it out somewhere no one you know would find you. In the end, you walked out of there with a lighter conscious and a new friend.

“Yah, Seun-ah!”

All heads turn to you, but you’ve learned how to not flinch anymore. You’re okay with people looking at you. Actually, you prefer it that way.

“Y/N!”

His baby giggle reaches your ears and you can’t help but laugh with him, basking in his glee. You’ve never seen someone so uplifting as Jackson; he could make you feel a thousand times better by just smiling at you.

“What are you doing here?” He asks as he hugs you tightly.

“Missed you,” You pout, laying your head in his sweaty chest. A lot of people speculated about you two, not really knowing where to categorize you– friend or girlfriend. Truth is, you’re more like family.

“Liar,” He teases and pulls back, holding your shoulders. His eyes find yours and you know you’re doomed, you can’t ever hide anything from him. “Hyejin called me.”

You sigh. “It’s not as bad as she makes it sound…”

“Yeah, it’s worse,” Jackson scoffs. “Dealing with Sumi is exhausting, but you do it, regardless. None of us knows why, and you won’t tell us, so don’t get mad once we get worried.”

“I’m not mad, just frustrated,” You explain. “Sumi asked me to talk to you about Mark. Didn’t he break up with his girlfriend like… four months ago?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think we should about this here,” He laughs a bit uncomfortable with the situation.

“It’s fine, I’ll just come up with an excuse for her,” You shrug. “I don’t know your friend, but from the little you told me, it sounds like it was bad.”

“Ye–

“It was.”

You look behind you at a sweaty boy in a purple sleeveless shirt. His curly dark hair is falling on top of his eyes, but you are familiar with the pain hidden behind it– abandonment. You just nod at him, a form of recognition, and he nods back.

“You’re Y/N,” He says, not really sounding like a question, but more like a guess. “Jackson talks a lot about you.”

“That’s me,” You smile sheepishly. “And you’re Mark.”

“The one and only,” He chuckles, offering you his hand to shake.

“Heard a lot about you,” You wiggle your brows in a shameless way that would have never crossed your mind, a few months ago.

“Oh, Jackson,” Mark teases. “Didn’t know you love me that much.”

“She means Sumi.”

Mark goes from happy to sour in a second. “She’s still insisting on that?”

“You know?!” You gasp.

“Of course I know,” He sighs, looking more tired now then when he was playing basketball with Jackson. “I’m pretty sure everyone knows.”

“Yeah…” At this point, you are clearly uncomfortable, not really sure about how to proceed; should you call Sumi and tell her that she should abort the mission? Should you just drop this issue? “I’m sorry she keeps bothering you. I’ll tell her you’re not interested, and I hope she leaves you alone, then.”

“Thank you, but this is not your problem to fix,” He smiles and for a second, you are speechless. It is almost as if Mark instantly took a weight off of your shoulders, and you feel lighter than you have in weeks. “I’ll talk to her myself.”

“Are you sure?” You ask, giving him an opportunity to change his mind… and to be honest, you are kind of hoping he would; then, he’d be just like everybody else, always asking.

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

What do you do when someone is finally giving, though?

———————————

“You!”

You turn around just to see an angry Sumi marching towards you.

“What did you tell Mark?!”

“Mark talked to me today,” Sumi says and her smile suggests anything but happiness. “Told me you talked to him.”

“And?”

“And he also told me, and I quote,” She scoffs. “‘You and I will never happen;’ so fess up, what did you tell him?”

You gulp. You can’t believe Mark did that, even though it now comes to your mind that you don’t know Mark at all.

I thought he was different, you think to yourself, frowning. Could this be why he didn’t let me talk to Sumi? To blame me?

“I didn’t say anything, Sumi,” You feel awkward, the kind of awkward one feels when they are telling the truth that no one will believe. “Mark is still feeling pretty down because of his–“

“I was the first one to start talking to you after your… makeover,” She seethes, whispering into your ear. “You were nobody. You could disappear and no one would notice– until I put you on the map. My mistake, for trusting someone like you, I guess. But hear me, Y/N, once people know you, they don’t forget anything about you.”

“Sumi–“

“See you late,” She fake smiles and leaves.

Not sure about how long you stand there, only when Wheein finds you that you collapse, legs faltering and eventually giving up on you. It’s been months since you felt it– the rush in your blood, the lack of air on your lungs, the buzzing in your ears; almost two months, to be exact, ever since the new semester started. The new you.

“Y/N!” She shouts, kneeling next to you. “Are you okay?”

“C-call Jack– Call Jackson,” You beg, in between deep breaths. “I can’t bre– Wheein, I can’t breath, I can’t breath, I can’t– Jackson… Jackson can help.”

“Okay,” She quickly dials your friends number. “Jacks! It’s Wheein… Where are you? Y/N’s having a breakdown, I’m not sure what’s happening, but I think it’s an anxiety attack. We’re by the fountain, near the Music department. Yeah. Okay. Alright. See ya.”

You look at her, tears in your eyes. Don’t give in, you think, watching your friend panic. For Wheein, keep it together. Wiggle your fingers. Count to 100. Wiggle your fingers. Count to 100. Wiggl-

“Hey,” A voice, not quite like Jackson’s, comes from behind you. “What’s up? Mind if I join?”

“Mark?” Wheein mutters, frowning as he kneels besides her, tight lip smile on his face. His eyes find yours and his smile widens a bit, shoulders relaxing.

“Hey, I love your shirt,” He points to you. “Keith Haring, right?”

You just nod, still breathing fast and shallowly.

“Did you know he used to paint the subways of New York?” You nod once again. “You did? Cool! What painting is your favorite?”

“W-what?”

“Come on,” He jokes, still smiling, still staring. “You’re an Art major! You must have a favorite! Tell me about it.”

“Re-Rebel With Many C-Causes,” You stammer out.

“Which one is that?” Mark asks, moving to settle down in front of you. He crosses his legs, knees touching yours, as he leans forward on his elbows. “I don’t remember…”

“The one with his own interpretation of hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil,” You mutter, blinking hard. Your heart seems to be slowing down, and air finds a gap through your throat and into your lungs. You’re gonna be okay.

“Ah!” He snaps his fingers, eyes wide and shinning with clear excitement in his face. “I remember that one! How could I forget– stupid me.”

“You’re not stupid,” You say, more out of habit then anything, but you can’t help but mean it. “Mark–“

“Y/N!” That’s Jackson. “Are you alright? Is everything okay? What happened?”

It’s almost as if hearing your friend’s voice summons you back to reality, and you look at Wheein, with her fearful eyes, and at Jackson, with his worried frown, and you look for Mark, with his excited smile, but he’s gone. In the midst of all the commotion, he left, and you didn’t even thank him.

———————————

It’s been a week since your panic attack, and weirdly enough, you started seeing Mark more and more. You’d see him with Jackson when he came over the Arts building, and you’d see him in the coffee shop whenever you hang out with Hyejin. He is at the cafeteria, at the hallway, at the bars; and you begin to wonder if he’s always been there and you just never noticed… sounds impossible, but extremely likely.

“What you thinking about?” Hyejin asks, poking you and making you squirm as you sip on your coffee. You two had been studying for the upcoming midterms and safe to say you are calmer, happy to be able to focus on something else besides Sumi’s threat.

“Mark.”

“What?!” She shouts, looking at you as if you are crazy. “Mark Tuan? Jackson’s friend? The guy that made Sumi go bitch crazy at you?”

“I’m not sure he did it on purpose,” You shrug. “He helped me, too, you know?” “Yeah, I know,” She rolls her eyes. “I’m still salty you called Jackson and not me.”

“He just knows what to do,” You chuckle.

“And apparently Mark knows too,” Hyejin wonders. “How, though? And why?”

“That’s what I’ve been thinking about,” You sigh. “I’m confused and–“

“Hey Y/N,” Before you can finish, Taehyung, a senior in Hyejin’s department, stops next to your table. “How are you holding up?”

“Me?” You ask. “I’m good, why?”

“I heard about your anxiety attack the other day,” He whispers, eyes exuding pity. “I’m sorry about what you’re going through, but things will get better! You have great friends to support you, so don’t give up, yeah?”

“What are you talking about, sunbea?” Hyejin asks, carefully looking at you. “How do you know about Y/N?”

“Sumi told me.”

You freeze.

“What exactly did Sumi say?” Hyejin is up, hands on both Taehyung’s shoulders.

“She said things weren’t too good for Y/N, right now… you know, at home,” He clears his throat, clearly uncomfortable. “And that’s why she changed so much. Sumi said she’s worried about you, Y/N, and that she’s trying to show you as much support as she can.”

“I’m going to kill a bitch,” Hyejin screams, grabbing her purse, and then turning to you. “Come on, love. We’re doing this. She can’t spread rumors about you like that, this is unacceptable! I’ll do the talking, you just stand next to me and–“

You grab her wrist tightly and hope that she won’t feel your shaking hands. “Thanks, Taehyung.” And you smile, the smile you practiced for so long in front of your mirror, for your friends, your teachers, yourself.

“No problem,” He smiles his boxy smile and you just can’t find it within yourself to be angry. “Let me know if you need anything! We’re all here for you.”

“Will do,” You say and pull a fuming Hyejin back to the couch you are sitting, holding her down until he’s far enough for you to breath out. You can feel a headache coming, and you rest your head on your hands. I guess there’s no escaping, now…

“What the fuck, Y/N?!” Hyejin mutter angrily. “Enough is enough! You can’t just let Sumi step all of you like that! She’s gone as far as making up rumors about you!”

“They are not made up,” You turn to your friend, gaging her reaction, and you can just tell it’s not going to be good. “I mean, technically they are made up, since there’s no way she’d know about my life outside this campus, but goddammit, she nailed it.”

“… what?” Hyejin whispers, eyes wide.

Sighing, you pack your backpack and get up. “Don’t worry too much, Hyejin-ah… I’ll be okay. I’m here now.”

Leaving her after spatting out news like that is not the best thing to do and you know, but you didn’t feel like explaining everything right there and then, especially considering that you’d have to retell that story to at least four different people. Once people know you, they don’t forget anything about you. Sumi’s voice echoes in your head, and you walk faster, with no destination in mind but wherever your body takes you. They don’t forget anything. They had to, though. They’d have to forget this. You are not sure you can survive if people know, if they remind you just how bad it is. You don’t want pity stares or careful smiles; you don’t want fake friends and meaningless support. You just want people to know your name. You just want them to remember you exist, because you are terrified that any day you could just disappear– and if that happens, you want someone to notice.

Telling your friends would be the easiest and wisest choice– you know. But there are emotional consequences that come with saying what you need to say that makes you extremely uncomfortable. This is not on them, so why should they suffer for it? Without noticing, you end up in you favorite place in that school: the basketball court. It is like your body knew you needed to let it out and brought you here.

“Shit,” You whisper, dropping all of your weight down and onto the floor in the middle of the court. It’s a beautiful night, if not for the traumatic news. The stars are out and the chill air makes it so that you can feel goosebumps on your skin. “Fucking hell. Shit shit shit shit.”

“Well, and here I was thinking today had been a pretty good day,” He sits next to you. “What happened?”

“You don’t want to know, Mark,” You sigh, looking at his shoes as he looms over you.

“If I asked,” He grunts as he sits down next to you, giving an odd deja-vu sensation. “It’s because I care.”

Care, you look at him with wide eyes. Not because he wants to know, or because he’s curious; but because he cares.

“It’s nothing,” You say, the lie feeling heavy and poisonous. “Don’t worry.”

“You might think you fool your friends, and they might pretend to be fooled, but you can’t really fool me, Y/N.”

“Drop it, Mark,” You lean on your elbows, eyes piercing though his and you see the challenge in his face.

“Why should I?” He scoffs while moving closer to you.

“Because I’m asking?”

“So?” His smile fakes innocence. “I don’t have to do something just because you want it. Believe it on not, this is for your own good.”

“You wouldn’t know what’s for my own good, Tuan,” You spit out, anger boiling in your blood. “You don’t know me. You don’t know what I’ve been through!”

“So tell me!” He says a bit more forcefully. “What have you been through?”

“A lot!” You blow up. You know there is no turning back and you don’t even want to go back; this is finally happening and nothing could stop you know. “I’ve been through hell and back this summer, Mark, and you wouldn’t even begin to understand it!”

“Oh yeah?!” There it is again– the challenge. “Try me.”

You are not sure exactly when you two got on your feet, standing mere inches away from each other, shouting at each other’s face. His forehead is almost touching yours and his chest is puffed forward, ready for what he knows is about to come. One hit; closed fist and not a lot of strength behind it. A try out, you could say. Then another one, once you realize it actually feels good and somewhat cathartic. And another. And another, and another, each stronger than the one before.

“Do you even know what is like to live in fear?” You shout, hitting his chest. He just stands there, taking it– taking it all. “What is like to realize that the person you looked up to, and loved, and cherished, and protected, turns out to be someone completely different? He’d threaten me, tell me horrible things, call me horrible names… and it all made sense! In my head he isn’t wrong but it’s not right– this is not right! He can’t do that; not after everything we’ve been through!”

The fact that you can’t breath is the first indication that you are crying, sobbing, into Mark Tuan’s chest. You scream and shout and punch, but he just stands there, hands around your shoulders, hit by hit, bringing you closer until you are flushed against him. Your voice is muffled once he presses you even closer, nestling your head on his neck; it takes you a while to process but for the first time in months you feel truly and undeniably safe. You feel protected, feeling the pressure of his arms around you and hearing the calming hushed assurances in your ear.

“It’s okay,” He whispers as his hand caresses your hair. Your hands stopped moving a while ago, choosing to clutch to his hoodie instead. Don’t let go, they seem to say. Never let me go. “It’s okay– you’re here now. You’re present. You’re safe. Do you understand what I’m saying, Y/N? Can you repeat it for me?”

You nod, not raising your head still.

“Come on,” He whispers again, and the feeling of his lips brushing against your ear is enough to make your breathing hitch. “You’re here.”

“I-I’m here,” You murmur.

“You’re present.”

“I’m pre– I’m present.”

“And you’re safe.”

The sheer strength of the words make you pull away slowly, looking for his eyes, for confirmation. And you see it.

“I’m safe.”

The kiss comes seconds after your voice fades, something within pushing you forward to meet him halfway. As his lips move, as firm as his words, you can hear him– you’re safe.

And as his hands pull you closer and closer and closer you hear him again– you’re safe with me.

———————————

“We need to talk.”

It comes from you and it surprises everyone.

“Yeah, of course,” Jackson frowns, scooting closer as Hyejin and Wheein sit down around you, too. “What’s up?”

“I’m ready,” You bite your lip, forcing yourself to say the words you’d trained all the way there. “If you guys want to know, I’m ready to tell you.”

“What are you talking about?” Wheein asks grabbing your hand.

“This summer,” You gulp, not being able to look them in the eyes. “My parents divorced. It was ugly– dad cheated, mom found out, and they split. Dad disappeared for a couple of months and I’m not sure if it was that or the fact that mom got a boyfriend, but my brother started acting… weird. He’d be gone for days and come back smelling of alcohol and weed, and at first I thought it was fine, you know? That it wouldn’t last, so I didn’t do anything… but it started to escalate and things started to get a bit out of hand. He’d have terrible fights with our mother, borderline violent, and he’d– he’d point his finger and come really, really close, like he was going to do something. I pulled him away a couple of times but after a while that didn’t seem to be enough either and I was scared, so, so scared, because the man that I always looked up to, the one that I idolized, my big brother, started acting like, like my dad. Explosive. Angry. Impulsive. We’d have terrible fights, once I started bringing this up, and after a while I guess I just didn’t know how to deal anymore, I just didn’t, I’m sorry guys, I–“

“Hey, it’s alright,” Wheein pulls you for a hug. “You’re okay. We got you.”

“The things he said,” You whisper, shutting your eyes tight, almost as if you opened them you’d see him again. “He said he’d kill me. That if I died and disappeared no one would know; no one would notice. He said I should go back to college and then told me to stay home. He’d change his mind in a second, and I started being more careful; talking less, spending more time outside the house, making sure to never be alone in the house with him. I guess I panic… maybe went into survival mode, but I believed him. I fully believed that if I disappeared no one would know, and when that became and actual fear I made sure that things would be different. Everyone would know my name. So I started being nicer– stupider, if you will. Doing small favors here and there as a way to please people, I guess? I know it sounds ridiculous but it made sense at the time, it really did… If people like you, they look for you. They talk about you. They know your name. That’s all I wanted, really. To have that security net, at least.”

The silence that follows the next moment is deadly; it feels suffocating, and you almost regret your decision. But then Hyejin speaks.

“We’d notice.”

You look at her face– not angry, no; she looks determinate. Sure of herself.

“We always notice,” She continues, tightening her hand on yours. “You change your hair, you try a new style, you don’t sleep well– we’ll always notice those little things, Y/N… because we love you. You are our best friend. You notice when we’re in a bad mood, or when we are happy, or sad, or anxious; you always know. So trust us, now. Believe what we say. We will always notice.”

“Hyejin-ah,” You sob, and you’ve done– you’ve finally done it. Being able to breath feels different; the compressing sensation on your chest gone. “Thank you. Thank all of you.”

“We are here for you, love,” Jackson says, joining what turns to be a group hug. “Whenever you feel unsafe, insecure, scared, anxious, happy, tired; we are here, so come to us, okay?”

You nod. “I promise.”

“Also,” He smiles and pulls away. “You’re always welcome at the Wang residence.”

“Mine too!” Wheein smiles.

“I don’t even have to say anything,” Hyejin laughs. “We all know my mom loves you more than me.”

“Well,” You sniff, smiling wide. “I am quite lovable.”

“And pretty unforgettable,” Jackson adds, wiggling his brows at you. “I know of a certain someone that hasn’t stopped talking about you ever since you met.”

You blush.

“Shut up, Jackson,” You jokingly push him away.

“Oh, I’m totally serious,” He says winking. “It started getting annoying so I just gave him your number.”

“Who are you talking about?” The girls ask at the same time.

“Mark Tuan, who else?” Jackson laughs as you try to slap his shoulder. “They kissed.”

“What?!” They shout again.

“Yah!” You scream, grabbing your bag and running after him. “I was going to tell them!”

“Liar!” He shouts back, still running. “He told me as soon as he got home last night!”

“Wait!” He stops. “He told you?”

His smile falters.

“What exactly did he tell you, Jackson?”

“He told me you were crying at the court,” Jackson sighs, knowing he made a mistake. “Didn’t tell me why, or what happened, I swear. But he told me he comforted you and things just kind of escalated and, you know, you two ended up kissing.”

You let out a relieved breath.

“So he didn’t tell you anything I told him?” You whisper more to yourself than anyone else, but he hears you and shakes his head. “Mark would never,” Your friend says. “Not after all that happened to him.”

“What happened to him?” You ask, more on impulse than anything.

“He didn’t tell me a thing about you, Y/N,” Jackson chuckles. “So if you want to know about him, why don’t you just ask?”

If I asked it’s because I care.

I care too, you say to yourself, waving your friends goodbye and running towards the basketball court. I care about you, too, Mark.

———————————

He’s not there when you arrive, but you wait. And wait. And wait a bit more and then text Jackson your whereabouts, knowing he’d relay the message.

“What are you doing here?” Mark asks as soon as he spots you laying down on the floor, hand slightly swinging from side to side as you draw the stars with your fingers.

“Looking for you,” You say without even looking at him, too concentrated. “Needed to talk.”

He chuckles a kind of chuckle that makes you smile in embarrassment from how easily you blush.

“Alright then,” He lays down next to you, immediately putting his arm under your head. “Let’s talk.”

“You said that if you ask, it’s because you care,” You say. “Before… last night.”

“Yeah, I did,” His voice is soft and you feel a puff of breath on your cheek. You turn your head and there he is, looking right at you, close, too close.

“I care too,” You whisper, moving to turn your whole body onto your side, choosing to face him despite the uncomfortable position on the hard ground. “So that’s why I’m asking… what happened to you, Mark?”

“What do you mean?” His hand is careful when touching your face, pushing a few strands of hair back behind your ear.

“You recognized something in me that night,” You say, frowning a bit as you try to be as clear as possible. “A specific type of hurt. So you asked. You pushed. But I recognize it, too, Mark; I see it on you the same way you saw it on me. Now I’m asking, because I’m worried. I might not know you for a long time, but I know you. You allowed me that… I’m sorry if asking is too much, but allow me a bit more. I want to be here for you the way you were there for me and–“

He shuts you up with his mouth, and thank god he did. His arms fold around you once more and there it is; that feeling– I’m safe. He’s safe. We’re safe. One hand goes to your neck and the other reaches out for your waist, making sure to keep you close. There is something new to the kiss, though; something deeper. It is languid, and powerful, and overwhelming, and you barely remember what happened before then. Only when he pulls away, smile on his face, canines showing in the dim night, that you remember. This is for him.

“I think I love you,” He says, and your heart skips a beat. “I know it’s been like, a few weeks since we met but I feel like I’ve known you my whole life. Might as well have, with how much Jackson talks about you, his passionate, beautiful, amazing, kind best friend.”

“Mark–“

“My ex,” He starts, and although he’s still smiling, the hurt is palpable. His body tenses up and your fingers move almost immediately, working on the knots on his neck and shoulders. “Was very controlling. Things were fine in the beginning because it’s young love, you know? They are supposed to be fine in the beginning, but they are not supposed to go so bad after…”

“What happened?”

“She used to make me feel worthless,” You heart shatters as he speaks. “Used to tell me I never did things right and that I was lucky to be with her. Sometimes she’d go as far as to say someone like her could never love someone like me, and the implications behind that did the rest. She’d scream if I went out with my friends, and cry if I tried to argue back… I used to feel like a piece of shit every single day– that lasted five months.”

You shuffle and your arms go around his head, cradling him to your chest, covering as much of him as you can– you wanted to make him feel protected.

“Then Jackson found me,” He continues, nosing your collarbone. “I was drunk and crying and everything was too loud, so he took me to his place, turned off my phone and sobered me up. The next day he didn’t let me go back to her place; he said we needed to talk. We talked for about three hours… and when I finally turned on my phone again and saw her messages and the things she was saying, it was like something finally clicked. I called her and broke up with her instantly. Never regretted ever since; but I’ve been recovering. A toxic relationship takes a toll on you, so I just needed time to come back to myself, be with my friends, get my life back. I thought it would take longer, but then I met you. I heard you talking to Jackson about Sumi and without him even saying anything, without even knowing me, you put my feelings first. It’s been a while since anyone’s done that and then your anxiety attack happened, and then last night, and I just couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“I couldn’t stop, either,” You whisper onto his hair. “Thinking about you.”

“I’m happy,” He sighs. “It’s been a long time, but I recognize it. Happiness.”

“I’m happy, too,” You pull away to look into his eyes and give him a light kiss. “And I’m healing, too. So I understand if you need time or space or–

“I don’t need time,” He says. “Or space. I just need support. Knowing that you’ll be walking next to me is all I need…”

“Then I’ll be right next to you,” You mumble, closing your eyes. “So whenever you need me, just call my name.”

You two end up falling asleep and waking up only the next morning, with Jackson and Jaebeom shouting and taking pictures. Your shoulder is stiff and you are pretty sure Mark can’t feel his arm, but you’ve never felt better.

It might’ve taken you a while but you’ve finally realized; the people around you– Hyejin, Wheein, Jackson, and now Mark,– they’d never forget you. They need you as much as you need them. They love you as much as you love them. They’d always call your name.

You don’t need nobody else for that. You have them.

-------------------------------------------------

hello lovelies! I am back! I am so sorry about disappearing like that, but things have been a bit complicated on my side of the computer... Everything is okay now, so I’m back to writing! As always, I hope you like this and please let me know what you think! Comment, like, share– it makes a writer’s day <3 love you all!

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ythmir-writes · 4 years

Note

may I request soft + lucifer?

fandom: Obey Me!

feat: Lucifer

no warnings!

A/N: and thank you for requesting him! my first Obey Me fic is for my bestest boi, so i am v happy ﾟ*｡(･∀･)ﾟ*｡

Soft

Lucifer entered the study and was not surprised to find Kita poring over their mountain of notes, muttering something under their breath. From the way their forefinger was repeatedly going over a line, it seemed they were intent to memorize a certain passage before turning the page.

He closed the door and kept his gaze on them as they continued to mutter, closing their eyes as their fingers began tapping on the table to help with some rhythm or other. Twice, they blew out a breath in frustration. And then they nearly swore, grabbed the book in both hands and looked for all intents and purposes, as if they were scolding it for being utterly confusing and hard to remember.

Lucifer nodded to himself. This was good.

He was pleased to see that Kita was taking the RAD midterms very seriously and he took satisfaction in knowing that they had taken his warnings of torture and hellfire, should they fail, to heart. Everyone should take his warnings to heart; it would save him all the trouble.

But as Kita carried on, Lucifer found that he was somewhat displeased all the same.

Kita had not noticed Lucifer enter study, nor did they turn their head to where he stood, continuing only to stare at the book in front of them.

Lucifer had half a mind to call out to them. How long had it been since they started studying now? Perhaps it would be best for them to pause and take a break?

But he hesitated, remaining by the door with Kita’s name and the words he wanted to say only half-formed on his tongue. Because reaching out would mean distracting Kita from what he had told them to do. He disliked the idea of pulling them away from what looked like a good flow in their work, and consequently opening himself to the possibility that he would be used as an excuse to discontinue any studying.

Besides, did he not himself disliked the idea of being interrupted whenever he was busy? Did he not go to great pains to make sure none of his brothers would make a mess when he needed to concentrate?

And yet.

It would seem that Lucifer disliked the idea of remaining unnoticed more.

So what exactly was he hesitating for? Surely, it was only a matter of calling Kita’s attention now, wasn’t it?

Lucifer took a deep breath, slightly unnerved that his thoughts would wander about before he could make a decision – but before he could even call to Kita, they had startled, turned their head, and looked at him.

“Oh, Lucifer.” Kita said, putting down the book. “I didn’t notice you there.”

“Yes.” Lucifer said, tone even, biting down the words you didn’t as he collected himself and ignored how now he was certain he very much disliked what he had just experienced and heard. But there was no sense in letting Kita know, much less any sense in allowing his mind to drag the issue further.

“I happened to pass by and saw the lights were open. You’re hard at work.”

“Yeah.” Kita repressed a sigh. “I’m in a bit of a rut, though. Hell has extensive history and I am trying very hard to memorize these names but it’s all just…” They trailed off, made a face that was almost one of distaste.

Lucifer waited for them to continue, using the silence to bridge the gap between them. When Kita only angled their head at him, Lucifer shook his in understanding.

“It bored you, didn’t it?”

“Not exactly…”

Lucifer almost snorted. “Trying to lie to a Demon, now?”

“Okay, fine.” Kita raised their hands. “But I was not bored, you know, exactly. I just felt it was all very monotonous.”

Lucifer quirked a brow.

Kita continued at his prompting. “I had thought that Hell’s rulers would have had more experiences that involved war and killing. You know, backstabbing and drama and mayhem! Instead, Hell’s history has been nothing but boring procedure and inheritance and deciding if a cousin or two could rule some lower province!”

“We are Demons.” Lucifer said. “Not uncultured savages.”

“I didn’t say that and you know I don’t mean it that way.” Kita rolled their eyes in mock exasperation, waved their hand at the book. “But this is all just so uninspiring and plain. If I wanted to know about Diavolo’s lineage and how much pedigree he has, I should be reading it from a very fancy and very elaborate Family Book. Not a book entitled History of Hell: In-depth Analysis of Important Historical Events.”

“That’s fair.” Lucifer chuckled. He’d had the same thoughts with the class then. “You better make extra effort then. I’ve heard that test is particularly tricky.”

Kita groaned into their hands.

“And you better not fail.” Lucifer reminded them.

“Sure. Your murderous pep talk last night at the House is a great motivator. Keeps replaying in my head how anything that will tarnish the name of the Great Lord Diavolo deserves only pain.” But Kita did not sound enthused.

“Punishment is the best motivator.”

Kita lifted their face from their hands. “Must it always be about punishment –”

“We are literally in Hell.”

“ – can’t I simply want to be a good exchange student and make you proud?”

Lucifer raised a brow and snipped away the tendrils of warmth that threatened to wrap around what little remained of his heart. He could not help but repeat what Kita had just said in disbelief. “You want me to be proud of you?”

“Humans can be very competitive!” Kita hurriedly added as they rubbed the back of their neck. An attempt, Lucifer noted, to hide the blush they usually had on that spot. “Can’t lose to Demons – even if they are the Lords of Hell – Luke won’t let me hear the end of it if I got less marks than Mammon or Asmo.”

Right. Right, of course. It would not have anything to do with him.

And yet.

Lucifer nodded. “Then do your best to make sure the little chihuahua won’t have anything to bark about.”

Kita averted their gaze. “Right.”

Silence lingered between them; Kita looking down at their book, hands still on their neck, Lucifer still standing and not quite knowing how to carry on with the conversation.

He should go. He should leave Kita to their studies, as was his original intention. He shouldn’t take more time than he already did from their schedule and he shouldn’t say anything further that would only prove to be distractions for the two of them. Idle conversation that would most likely lead to nothing unproductive. Besides, they would need a lot of time memorizing all the names –

“Well, then –”

“Lucifer, look – ”

They started to speak at the same time, stopped at the same time, and stared at each other waiting for the other one to start again.

“You go.” Kita then said.

“No, you continue.” Lucifer said, placing emphasis on his next words. “I insist.”

Kita seemed to recognize the tone he used as the one that brooked no argument. They took a deep breath, hesitating at first, before very slowly patting the book in front of them. “Can you help me with this?”

“What?”

“I mean – if you’re not too busy, of course.”

Lucifer stared at them as they continued to ramble, continued to explain that they knew Lucifer was also studying for exams on top of council duties but that he did tell all of them to study well – and they were trying, all the brothers have sworn off any shenanigans for two days – but they also know he’d aced this test before and Kita was, quite frankly, completely at a loss so if he could help them and maybe quiz them so they could retain the names more, that would be immensely helpful and they would be forever grateful.

“And,” Kita continued, nearly out of breath, “if you have any nuggets of wisdom now is the right opportunity to maybe share.”

Lucifer knew he could count the times when prizes had been so deliberately placed in front of him for the taking with little effort, knew he’d not even reach the count of three, knew that all he needed to do at the moment was to pluck the gem laid out before him and take it for what it was: a golden opportunity best taken advantage of while it lasted.

These moments were far and few in-between; life had never really been kind to him.

But he could not help but be a fool – a prideful fool – who distrusted anything he did not schemed for or forcibly took. “What it’s in it for me?”

“What?” Kita looked genuinely bewildered.

“What do you offer in exchange for my help?” Lucifer leaned on the table, wanting nothing more than to take back what he said and yet couldn’t. Or wouldn’t. “My help comes at a cost.”

“Cost? I’m just asking for – oh. Oh.” Kita clasped their hands together, eyes brightening.

And again, this took Lucifer by surprise. He had expected them to sulk, or retract their plea, or at least be annoyed at him. Kita had come from genuine need for results – a result he had demanded of them – and here he was demanding something from them again. If Lucifer were in Kita’s position, he would not hesitate to turn the offer down. Violently. Part of him had even prepared for the possibility that Kita would be angry.

But they were not. Far from it.

How was it so easy for them to take him by surprise?

“Of course! Because Demons will never do anything without this weird give-me- your-soul-in-exchange-for-a-wish thing, huh?” Kita laughed.

Lucifer found himself staring at them again. “Not your soul – ”

“I know, I know.” Kita waived their hand, stopping him mid-sentence. A rare thing – how many times had they interrupted him in the five minutes since this conversation started? “I’m a treasured exchange student, my soul isn’t up for grabs, blah blah blah.”

Kita looked at him with a determined glint in their eyes now, and the warmth that Lucifer had turned away earlier came back with a vengeance and with no intention of going away.

“First though, if I do pass the test than that means I won’t be suffering any tortuous punishment.” Kita said. “And you have to treat me to Devildom’s best ice cream.”

“It’s a little too late to change the terms to our first agreement but, all right.” Lucifer agreed. “As for my terms –”

Kita interrupted him for the umpteenth time. “If I score lower than Mammon, I’ll treat you to ice cream.”

“How utterly dull.” He scoffed. “If you score lower than any of my brothers, you will have to treat me to something from the human world that I have not yet tasted.”

“What?!” They gasped. “That’s impossible!”

“I think it’s only fair. Since it is in my interest that you pass this test with flying colors, it is only common sense that I put in such parameters to this new agreement. Besides, I’m the one rendering service, shouldn’t I be the one who gets to say my price?”

“Well, yeah…” Kita chewed on her lip. “But hang on, does this mean your reward is to actually see me pass the test?”

“Do not misunderstand. I expect all of my efforts to bear nothing but the best fruit and as such your passing is but the natural course. However, in the unlikely event that you do fail, then my reward is the execution of your punishment and the pleasure of something novel from the human world.”

Kita slowly nodded. “I was expecting something else, really.”

Lucifer raised both brows, curious.

But Kita only shook their head. “But more importantly, do you seriously think I can top Satan’s score?”

“Of course.” Lucifer answered, taking the empty seat beside them. “I am the one tutoring you, am I not?”

Kita grinned widely at that. “You should not let Satan hear that.”

“I have all the confidence in my skills and all the faith in yours.”

“Whatever.” Kita’s hands went to their neck again. “But all right. Deal. I can practically taste my ice cream already.”

Lucifer took out his personal pen, flipped open the book to where Kita was last reading. “Now, I want you to look at these names and tell me what stands out to you the most.”

It was only when Lucifer was sure Kita was immersed again on their textbook did Lucifer allow himself the softest of smiles. Something that he knew he never believed he could do.

Lucifer did not count how many hours passed as he and Kita went over dates, places, names that were too familiar, too weird, and too closely spelled to be any different from all the others. He did not count how much snack they both consumed or how much coffee Kita managed to guzzle in-between bathroom breaks. Nor did Lucifer count how many times he had sensed his brothers peaking at them from the door, with him bracing himself for any interruption. But none of them entered – if only in their respect for Kita and what they wanted to accomplish.

But Lucifer did count the times Kita was close enough that their arms brushed against each other, and the times Kita would lean over to where he was point at the map and he could smell their perfume. Lucifer counted the times Kita smiled triumphantly at having recalled something faster, the times they rubbed their cheeks in frustration, and the times they laughed at his comments on about Devildom history.

He counted. And each one, he tucked inside that warmth spreading in him, making him feel a lot of things he would not bother counting or saying out loud.

35/182

#Obey Me #Obey Me! Lucifer #ythmir writes #ythmir fanfics #35/182 #182 #first obey me fanfic #and i hope i did my best boi some justice #i just want softness for him for my first fic

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vague-idea · 5 years

Text

This is purely fueled by petty rage and caffeine so buckle the fuckle up.

There has been a lot of talk lately about if Celine was a good person, how bad Actor Mark was, blah blah blah. This is been a topic from pretty much day one of WKM but recently it’s popped up in relevancy. I’ve never really vocalized my thoughts on the matter, despite having many. I’m the kind of person who tears stories apart for fun, so I know a bit what I’m talking about. Get ready for these spicy hot takes, cause guess what:

They’re all bad. All of them. Including everyone's favorite boy. That’s right, the uwu-too-pure-for-this-world-boy, Damien.

Now put down your pitchforks for a second and hear me out. You can send me hate later. What I’m here to do is take a look at Mark’s characters, look at their actions (both implied and shown), and then show that none of them are innocent. If this is a mess, uhhh sucks to suck I guess. (the person sucking is me. hah gottem)

First, before I get into the characters however, we need to discuss Mark’s storytelling. Personally I like it quite a bit. It’s interesting and it’s engaging, but it does have its quirks and flaws. You can see the improvement, but it does effect how his characters have come across. Mark himself has admitted to writing Celine poorly in WKM, and I would tend to say that much of WKM should have been adjusted. It’s not “Who Killed Markiplier” but “Why Killed Markiplier” as Mark has said, and the why was never really shown in the series. It’s explained in a live-stream, and if you can’t get your intentions across in the series then something in the script is wrong. Having said that, Mark has improved his writing immensely and I applaud him for that.

Mark prefers to tell a singular story, leaving much of what he intends up to speculation. He doesn’t tell you the story of how Wilford became the insane goofy murderer he is today; he shows you a moment of weakness and connection between Abe and Wilford. He doesn’t show you how Damien and Celine became Dark, he tells you the story of two siblings protecting each other and being backed into a corner in which playing the part of a villain is their only escape. The intention is plainly there, but you have to understand the characters to truly get the story. “You’re too focused on the minutia” is true. The fans pay too much attention to the details of the story. You have to focus on the characters and their motivations to understand the tale Mark is weaving. Don’t focus on Wilford being in two places at once, or Damien’s hand turning gray in one shot. Focus on the characters and who they are because in the end that’s what they are: characters. With the release of DAMIEN, Mark has made it clear that the characters are the important things, made to be placed into whatever story he pleases. (uh Mark if you’re reading this that is a dope idea and holy fuck im hype)

Now to actually talk about the characters.

Let’s start with Celine, since she is the main focus of this debate. First and foremost, Celine is manipulative. She knows what she wants, and she will get it at any cost. This is shown from the moment she steps into the manor. She turns everyone against the DA. Isolating us, and making us feel vulnerable. Then, with a gracious olive branch, she let’s us help. We are now special, but we can only trust Celine. An interesting parallel to “Don’t Trust the Seer.” After the DA has the fall, Celine is there yet again. Forcing Damien asleep, she uses us to gain a body, and then kicks the DA out into the mirror, making us now a viewer of this world. In DAMIEN, she manipulates Damien into sleeping. Keeping him tucked away and safe. Celine’s primary characteristic is manipulation. Getting what she wants, no matter the cost. She is protective, she is abrasive, she is determined, and she is cold.

Now let’s look at Mark. His personality isn’t so plainly laid out as the others (seeing as he fuckinn dies in the first five minutes), so we’re going to have to rely on what the others have said about him to get the picture. The first thing we hear about Mark is from the Colonel. Obviously, a man with prejudice, but still has an insightful look into who Mark is. “My name is Markiplier now! Forget that my friends are the ones who helped me along the way. Just look at me and my money. I need to pay people to be my friends. Ahaha. Oh you like me, too bad.” Then, even Mark himself has said: “I used to be somebody. Maybe not somebody good, but I was somebody.” (Granted this is from the meta ending, but I’m still going to use it because ADWM still applies and I’m an asshole and you can’t stop me) Both these sentences are inferring to a man who was changed by fame and fortune. This infers to a man who took and took, so up his own ass that he started ignoring his friends in favor of becoming richer and increasingly powerful. I think that is that crux of Mark’s character: power and control.

In DAMIEN, Mark has some insightful comments that back this up. “You stole everything from me.” ... “Well you wouldn’t even have anything in the first place if it wasn’t for me.” ... “You were never good enough for Celine.” ... “I gave up everything for her!” This exchange back and forth between Damien and Mark leads me to believe that Mark, through his power and fame, gave the twins everything they had. He gave Damien his mayor position. He gave Celine money, influence, power, and his love. Mark might have thought he was doing these things for them, but if you look at who Mark is, he was doing these gracious actions to have control over the twins. Damien now owes Mark for giving him his job and his power. Celine owes Mark for her comfortable home and a loving husband. This is further proved by Mark’s interaction with the Colonel. Using the money that William owes to Mark, the guilt of cheating with his wife, Mark controls the Colonel and makes him work for him. Controls him, up til the moment that William looses his mind. Mark values control, and he values power.

I don’t think I need to explain how Wilford is a bad person, but ya know let’s just say it: cheater and murderer. His character is insanely fun, and I love the depth and nuances to it, but he’s not the one we’re focusing on today. Here’s just here for me to say that I love him, and he was just a pawn in the backstory of WKM.

Now, for the controversial opinion. Damien. Everyone’s sweet, innocent, could never hurt a fly, mayor. Well, sorry my guys but that is just not correct. Damien’s role in this story is integral, and let me say the misjudgment of his character annoys me a lot but that’s just cause I’m salty all the time so let’s just jump into it. Damien is not innocent. As Mark says, “Always the righteous crusader. Pure as the driven snow. Acting like you’re the only one without blood on your hands.” There is blood on his hands. Good intentions aside, Damien has a fatal flaw and that is that he is a coward. He may want what is best for everyone, but he cannot find his own spine. Throughout WKM, despite being the mayor - a fuckinn leadership position - he takes a backseat of running after the Colonel, running after the DA, and running after Celine. He is easily used, and easily discarded. He lets others walk over him, and in doing so lets everything around him fall apart. It isn’t until DAMIEN when he has lost literally everything that he finally sheds the title of pawn and becomes a player. Damien isn’t pure. He is soaked with the blood of every dead body he could not lead and he could not protect because he was too much of a coward to do what was right.

Looking at all of these characters, I hesitate to label them as bad or good. I know I just said that they’re all bad, but welcome to clickbait. Celine is manipulative, but she cares about her brother and she fights for herself. Mark is power hungry, yet he loved and he lost. Damien is a coward, yet he cares for others. Looking at them as they are, I cannot say that they fit perfectly into role of villain or hero. This story isn’t that simple. It’s created to flip the script.

But, everyone is arguing about Celine and Mark’s past so let’s jump into that mess of a conversation.

Celine is a manipulator. Mark wants control and power. Damien wants everyone to be happy. William/Colonel has a one track mind and currently it’s set on fuck. This is who they are, and from this we can try and determine their backstory. Granted, this is my view and my speculation but I think I’m pretty on track. I can honestly say that at one point, Celine and Mark loved each other. They are both too obsessed with having what they want to settle for marrying someone they hate, or even marrying someone they were indifferent too. They loved each other, and they had to have each other. Things can change, however. What started as something fueled by love can turn into something fueled by vengeance.

Mark is obsessed with control, and so he tried to keep a tight hold on what he loved. Celine detests being the pawn when she is the player, and so when she wanted William, she had to have him. Throughout the series it is shown that Mark viewed Celine as his. William/Colonel stole her from him. She was his, and she was taken. On the opposing side, Celine is no prize to be kept. Her love shifts from Mark to William/Colonel and she takes what she wants. At the end of the day, she would carve their hearts out for attempting to keep her in a cage as their pretty songbird. Also, I believe that Damien knew that Celine was cheating, but he couldn’t bare being the one to break apart his childhood friends, so he said nothing. He let his cowardice destroy what he only wanted to preserve.

Celine and Mark could have never worked together, because they both want to control and they couldn’t control each other. Damien could not lead, and was used and walked over until he and those he loved were dead. William/Colonel barely had a say; each step he took was a line in Celine and Mark’s strategy. It wasn’t until he broke that he was able to break the script.

So what does this mean, Eli? Who is the good guy and who is the bad guy? Why doesn’t this story play into exactly what I want? Why don’t these characters fit these little tropes I want to place upon them?

It means none of that, reader. You can call them bad, and you can call them good. You can make Damien into a hero, and you can make Celine into an abuser. You can say Mark was taken advantage of, you can blame the manor, or you can call him evil. You can do whatever you want with them, but that is only possible by ignoring that they are so much more than that. This story is not meant to fit into a square. This story at its basis is to show that these are stereotypical characters, meant to play a role, who have broken it.

#markiplier #celine #actor!mark #damien #my hot spicy take #if anyone wants to debate this uhhhhh #you can def try but ples don't come at me with the same boring arguments i keep seeing #also feel free to send me hate #i dont give a fuck what you think of me #come at me scrublord im ripped

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elizabethrobertajones · 6 years

Text

13x07 Watching Notes

Should probably not have multiple scenarios where I snark out loud and then the very next line of dialogue is that snark but innocently delivered.

Heyooo it’s not our Christmas cliffhanger though!

Expectations: It has literally just occurred to me right now sitting down to type out my expectations that this season's *entire* main plot so far has been "the spawn of satan is cuter than we expected".

I'm still trying to wrangle the idea of how you get hours of Buckleming plot twists and slow exposition out of this, although introducing 18 different angles for them to tackle the problem and returning us to the AU world is a good start to have at least 4 plot threads going and hey I feel like this episode is supposed to be a breather for having too many Jack episodes in a row which makes it even funnier that they're gonna have to deal with the absence of something but who knows maybe he will show up before episode 9. If not they may genuinely be tricked into considering narrative negative space in some form or another, at least by the actual omission of Jack from the episode, despite the fact it has to be about him.

There's like at least 3 individual ways each arc might go terribly, and I'm typing this as pre-yoga thoughts while trying to do my NaNoWriMo and I watched Brooklyn 99 already this morning, and essentially I'm pretty much just bracing against "Oh god this new sleep pattern is the worst and it has ruined nearly every episode this season for me" migraines. So I'm just gonna be super chill because the stress of this ridiculous bed at 8pm awake at 5am thing is killing me without bad writing on my favourite show.

So, instead of modelling a worst case scenario, here's a best case one: it's crowded, the pacing is bad, there's some bizarre lines of dialogue and no room for any character interaction and the sneak peek already showed us the sum total of Destiel interaction but in hindsight with the rest of the episode that's actually a plus, and aside from that there's no rape or catastrophic bad decisions or characterisation that just makes our guys look like idiots because the villains aren't that smart and they're still outwitting them or something. Cas wasn't even mentioned in the episode description if I recall and I would like to think that is because he gets Buckleminged in the way where they forget he exists so he's in 2 scenes and just kinda stops at some point and that's the last we hear of him for a few episodes but at least nothing happened to him :P

(It HELPS that the bad decision of the year seems like it should be Jack and Kaia ganging up in 13x09 and this is just a plot filler episode where they can't blow everything up from sheer incompetence, since the main plot is still Jack, and all Buckleming can do is escalate stuff but not so much we find Jack, so they're mostly running free with Lucifer, Michael and Asmodeus on the playground they've been permitted to keep them distracted. On the other hand, that does not lend itself towards 'storytelling structure' whatsoever. So I may derive some fun from mentally re-writing this episode as it goes as well.)

Hi I'm back and I have tea and preemptive paracetamol and look I not do crap like this lightly but the only thing wrong with me is sleep and yoga but glug glug glug down the hatch, I'm not fucking around, migraine. I swear to god if I even see a HINT of you...

I should also mention that my only prep for this episode was watching Tall Tales last night with my mum because we're lightly re-watching season 2 and I thought you know what look how far that fucker has come that he's just one of the show's regular directors now or something. I forgot that completely this morning so I'm amending my expectations (it WAS annoyingly early in the day) to add that Speight hasn't directed a Buckleming yet but I'm interested to see how he handles it.

The episode starts with Mary cheerfully punching Lucifer at least 3 times in the face. I am still extremely proud of her for doing that but overall disappointed that it's led to her banishment to be a Buckleming character this season, which has been a fast way to ruin characters.

We get the entire first minute of the recap in Buckleming POV, aka they write the corny villains - and specifically a lot of Asmodeus point of view, his summary of the situation and what needs doing, having graciously inherited this throne, and comments on where Lucifer is as a sort of trailing off, well that's not my concern if he's gone. Only at the minute mark does the recap flip around to something genuinely ABOUT Jack as we've been seeing him, rather than trying to sell Jack as woooo Lucifer's scaaary son. Suddenly Jack's own identity crisis and him leaving.

Maybe it's just because they were trimming for time, but they cut the "all of you" from "I know I'm going to hurt you" but they also left the focus on Sam. I am mostly amused that by removing the clarification - which has been a theme of the season - it reduces that moment to a bare minimum surface layer, as if to say bye bye writing depth hello random action.

I had a burgeoning theory last year from one episode or another that pretty much everyone is lampooning Buckleming while letting them get on with writing their stuff, and trying to run loops around them in basically any other way.

There was something going on on screen involving a lot of stock footage while I was digging around in my bag looking for my 3DS assuming this was gonna be a Lucifer scene. I still think they're softening him up to kill him, but that's something I have to hope. One of the other non-redemption options is that they need to make him at least halfway manageable if he is gonna end up working with Cas or something. There is something vaguely appropriate matching Buckleming dialogue to Lucifer melodramatics, but unfortunately I really can't give these writers or that character much of a chance so while I'm happy to let them take him to play with over on their bit of the story like a chew toy to keep them off the stuff I like, it is annoying this is all the canon of the show I like >.>

One or the other of Buckleming really really dislikes God and organised religion though, and that does often lend the interesting thing to an episode where for some reason as soon as religion is involved the writing actually gets halfway decent.

One thing Lucifer says that catches my interest is his idea the universe is written without irony, when tbh that has literally been his downfall in season 5, and in general the universe is ironic to the WINCHESTERS to whom the universe is actually happening to, and there's the whole Dean is the centre of the universe thing, and THEN there's Billie's line about how sometimes the universe is poetic, coupled with how Dean got Cas back entirely through dramatic irony. I can't remember if Chuck commented on dramatic irony. Anyway Lucifer sucks, the story doesn't happen to him and he doesn't have the resources to read it. Metatron *thrived* on that sort of thing.

I like the visual of Michael standing with the sun behind him - it gives him absolutely the divine look he'd love to have, and I just wish he didn't have randomly shirtless Lucifer taking up some of that visual. If someone doesn't make a gifset chopping Lucifer out to just enjoy that image, I will make one, perhaps.

Something else to enjoy about this: they locked Mark P in some sort of medieval torture device and no matter how comfy you try and make it, there's obvious limits to that, so I will enjoy that he had to do that.

Michael sees that Lucifer is scared of being locked up and caged, which actually is... accidentally or not... a pretty clever callback, although it wouldn't have killed them to have Michael deduce this on screen, because in 9x18 Dean - Michael's vessel - deduces that Gadreel - a blatant Lucifer parallel in many respects while obviously not in many many others - is terrified of being caged again.

Of course that exchange is one of the single most fascinatingly well-acted exchanges of the entire show which on my umpteenth viewing still knocks me completely flat so it's not a FAIR comparison, but it is an interesting one.

I like that Michael think that the main universe is already paradise - in comparison to his shithole, definitely, because it still has pretty stock footage. Thematically interesting since obviously paradise is a bit of an issue with what people want...

LOL Wanek's ridiculous "concrete bunker" set... The camera pulls back and there's a massive Jesus on the wall and Lucifer's hanging behind him screeching and it's like... That is an inanimate lump of wood and I can see it rolling its eyes at you.

In the earlier moments out here in the AU we saw the church from 8x23 poking up out of the rubble, and whether this is the same one or not NOW, because I think it was a bit too buried to be this one, it conjures the memory of 8x23, and that one was interesting specifically because Jesus wasn't there - the cross had only his hands and feet remaining and the rest had been torn down. Sam was inserted into that empty space because he was doing the big heroic world-saving sacrifice that from one direction of pure irony the episode was named after (since he decided not to do it/the real motives for his sacrifice were way more interesting than him going through with it heroically anyway etc) but it was another Sam and Jesus moment, like in 5x22 where he more straight-forwardly sacrificed himself.

(And jeeze you watch one episode with the guy and now I can't get him out of my head - remembering in 9x18 Gabriel snarking about how he died for their sins and then making one of the few Jesus references on the show. Jesus is usually extremely absent from this show, so actually having him on screen is very interesting)

Anyway I am pretty sure this is almost entirely to remind Lucifer what a great big fucking drama queen he is being about this all and of course he's sacrificing for nothing.

Blah blah promo scene.

They have the photo of Jack from Mia's security camera which means no one has snapped a cute picture of him on their phone yet, Cas included. Disappointing.

Now, I'm pretty hesitant to get into characterisation in BL episodes, and Dean just generically wryly comments on how powerful Jack is which could mean anything but Sam then says he might be covering his tracks and then Cas, who has to be written sympathetic to Jack, comes through the door saying that it could mean Jack is in trouble with the various forces that want to control him. Sam's comment coupled with Cas's interruption seems to make it much more likely that Sam's comment is to be taken as vaguely unnerved/suspicious of what Jack can do, and that he's doing things like that Dean implies. That Jack learned so fast he might be able to cause a fair amount of destruction but conceal it from them and if they're trying to track him, Sam is expecting destruction.

Dean also came from the kitchen with coffees so why is Cas coming from the back of the Bunker... I'm gonna have to assume he was until just now lounging around in Dean's bed and Dean was like I better go get coffee and help Sam and Cas was like yeah but thanks for the 'sorry your son ran away' sex i feel a lot better and Dean was like no problem babe, and probably gave Cas one of those ridiculous shoulder nudges in the most no homo way ever before he got up to find where they threw his underwear an hour earlier, and Cas just kinda chilled while Dean was getting the coffee so as not to be suspicious by piling in on Sam after taking the exact same length break from the search but then they fucked it up and still managed to enter the scene within 30 seconds of each other.

Yeah, that's probably it.

I just saw the list of guest stars wander by and took 3 emergency gulps of my tea at that combo of Osric and for some reason DHJ because file that under genuinely unexpected :P

PS: I know we knew Kevin would be back this year but the fact I managed to find Kevin thematic stuff in the last 2 episodes in a row still feels important to me as storytelling rather than foreshadowing.

Anyway Cas tries to tell Dean the angels don't like him, and Dean volunteering to go with him because "i could go with you" is a thing and they keep doing it to each other and ow

Blah blah we could work a case. Are you serious? I really seriously hope this is not literally Buckleming's thought process about wtf do we do with Sam and Dean this episode after establishing maybe 4-5 other plotlines we need to handle away from them. I hope it turns out to be directly main plot related, whatever they stumble on, but we already now have them in a position where any involvement with the main stuff will be them stumbling on it or it coming to them. See above: ways in which the main characters are automatically made to be stupid. Subtle things, like not being able to imagine a way in which Sam and Dean are resourceful enough to even start to find Jack which doesn't involve googling things.

I mean we have no clue what you're doing with this random witch seeming case, why can't you bring a detail foreward if it's from the main plot to give us a clue. And if it's not, tell us something connected to it which will at least make Sam and Dean interested in it as a lead? Even if they're not right about why, put them on the trail because they're good at their jobs!

Anyway hi Asmodeus? As soon as we clear the promo scene etc I start assuming everyone is Asmodeus

I mean, in this case it literally is. but you can't trust anyone these days.

He needs to have his equivalent scene to sitting around in the Bunker googling, which, which is to say, the same type of minions who brought Crowley or Lucifer news are now coming toadying in to tell Asmodeus news, and the only difference is his name is harder to spell.

He's trying to do the same thing reaching out to Jack that we saw Lucifer trying to do last season, to Dagon. There is always the possibility that Asmodeus just isn't powerful enough to get into Jack's head from this extreme range when he has no idea where he is. Loser.

This minion seems to be mistakenly labelling Jack as "the Jack", maybe not as a mark of respect but more misunderstanding what he is, that he's not a thing, that that's his name...

Asmodeus asks who's protecting Jack, and cut to the image of Jesus again. I don't know about him, but tbh it could just be that Jack is protecting HIMSELF and they've massive underestimated him to do that. Jesus on this show represents a lot more of the personal autonomy saving yourself thing.

Also hey as long as we're not seeing Jack, we're getting that gosh darned hole in the narrative that he represents while he's missing. Is this actually a lesson in subtlety?

Michael meanwhile is enjoying tormenting Lucifer some more because blah blah sole purpose in life and what do you even do when you win.

Lucifer appears to have claimed to be a god in the SPN verse and Michael's like, here you're pathetic, and I'm like, mate, he was pretty pathetic in the main SPN universe too

There's some cool crosses on the walls which are trying to help, bringing light into this church.

Yeah where is Mary anyway - I wasn't gonna ask, but then Lucifer seemed to imply that Michael was keeping her around.

I mean sheesh the easiest way to get Mary around is to just have her in the scene still lurking but then film it as if it's almost entirely from her eyeballs POV if she doesn't have anything else to be doing right now - having her witnessing this theatre as the person from the main SPN world who's come over here.

KEV

Awwww he's gone a wee bit off the rails in this world, seeing as he'd have had to be helping Michael and reading tablets the entire time and also the entire world appears to be destroyed.

I don't know why Lucifer's having a personal reaction to Kevin unless I totally forgot something but they were literally never in the same seasons as each other although weirdly both in 11x21 so obviously must just be angels would know all the prophetsand which one was currently active... Maybe he's just surprised that in the AU Kevin survived even longer than he did in the supposedly better world.

Well there aren't any Winchesters in this one and Lucifer always underestimates them, in this case positively re: likelihood of getting Kevin killed :P

Oh great they're powering down Lucifer a bit. Well that should make him much more irritating.

I mean mostly because everything makes him irritating.

But it means the show wants him around some more but they can't have him at full power because it's just inconvenient so now they're finding a reason to water him down so they can have him around dragging his heels and complaining. I suppose it might make some comparisons to Cas, who's on a smidgen of left-over grace, but again, see also: eye rolling wooden Jesus, there's no way you can redeem Lucifer and not by comparing him to Cas.

Metatron got some sort of treatment but he was nowhere near like Cas even when he was done being redeemed and he still had to be killed off doing a heroic thing rather than let him stick around.

I'm just grinding my teeth and I already got part of the way through the next scene but UGH

So hey thinking of random versions of other characters why is DHJ's magnificent facial hair making a cameo return role on this side of the interdimensional nosense? You can't just grow a beard and start hunting witches on the down low on the winchesters' turf.

I'm assuming including DHJ's names in the credits was specifically some sort of nonsense now

specifically monsters going around looking like other things.

Maybe it was a shapeshifter Ketch punched a few weeks ago. It's only been a few weeks since he died, you know.

Maybe it's Asmodeus.

Maybe it's maybelline

The plot reason for the beard had better be hilarious.

I like Daniella the Beret Witch. For some reason I thought she looked tons like the witch Sam and Dean were looking at on the CCTV but when I went back to look I actually spotted her in the background watching them and waiting to make her move, and she doesn't look like the one on the CCTV at all so I guess my brain clocked her and filed her away because she was sitting around in a huge scarf, sunglasses and a beret and my brain didn't want me to not pay attention to her in case she was useful.

Kevin's weirdly pristine but still grey hoodie is making me giggle. He looks like the AU has barely touched him and Michael's even dirty and ragged.

I'm not sure I even want to touch random morality discussions from Buckleming. Lucifer says Michael is pure evil, Kevin says "aren't you Satan?" and Lucifer really hasn't done anything ever to make us actually want to root for him. Like sure Michael is the much worse bigger bad in the show's rankings but that doesn't make Lucifer less quanitifiably evil. Michael's way more complex because Lucifer is the big cartoon evil that Sam had to originally fear, the "what if I am actually evil" character mirror that obviously Sam isn't but it meant Lucifer needed no character complexity other than whiny manipulative interpretations of how he'd been mistreated where he could protest he had a side. Michael is waaaay more complex just in the like 2 episodes he actually talks in season 5 because he's "what if Dean was the big bad" and he's not evil, he's just 100% black and white morality rigid "good" in the sense of punishing evil, to the point of not questioning an order to kill his brother, and not even having a particularly "cool motive still murder" approach like Cain, but literally just like well okay then I guess I will kill my brother. How to make DEAN evil, or to personify the darkness that lives in him.

I mean I am massively simplifying but dear lord Buckleming if you read my notes this is the baseline direction you need to be writing these characters from and I am trying to HELP.

I am genuinely feeling like you're mistaking "apparent fan favourite because they make a lot of memes about him, Lucifer" as "this must mean people genuinely like him because he's Lucifer" and any possible reason I would find him interesting as a villain who was held up to just kinda exist and be himself doing his awful things contrasted to Michael who was just around existing and doing his awful things, is all just draining away down the toilet. Like you've got Lucifer lodged in there and you're flushing and flushing around him >.>

Anyway I'm going to take this entire scene as 100x more ironic than it was probably originally intended to be, that Kevin is not exactly right about Michael (and lol, Michael being the Dean parallel just kinda using Kevin all the time for random spells and always having him on the hook for doing things for them) but he's sure not wrong about Lucifer, Lucifer protesting Michael is evil because he's mistreating him and has destroyed this planet sure isn't WRONG but it's not a "so therefore I must be right"

And I kind of think the level of subtlety this writing is at is that "Michael is a dick and therefore Lucifer looks better in comparison"

But that's not how any of this works

*insert Jesus eyeroll*

*pats poor overworked manic AU!Kevin's hair*

I wonder if he's actually going to be able to do it

it would be HILARIOUS if they waste Lucifer's grace on this

Hey he did it, I'm proud of you AU!Kev. He always manages to do the thing :P

Okay not good that Lucifer has just been thrown back because A: Mary is still trapped over there, I assume for the much more important emotional arc stuff to do with rescuing her especially in the parallel to getting Cas back and all this stuff for Sam's arc and all

But UGH the writing of Lucifer is just really annoying me on so many levels and punting him back into the main SPN universe depowered and humbled by his brother, just annoys me so much.

Like I don't know how much more less enthused I have to be about Lucifer having struggles.

Boo hoo

Last season Dean got mistaken for homeless after he got hit with the memory spell, and was offered cash to make him go away.

he handled it considerably better than Lucifer.

I am just gonna assume this random woman is Asmodeus.

Lucifer probably ought to go grab that cash he was offered...

Oh wait here's Asmodeus, torturing some poor bloke called Karl who apparently works at the motel from last week.

I'm impressed they managed to track Jack that far, tbh

The question is, is there an actual memo that the Winchesters are camped in an old, heavily warded, impossible to map or locate MoL bunker, or is that something you only find out after you tail them for a bit? I mean Jack might not be there any more either but it would be a start :P

I feel extra skeevy about this scene because Asmodeus is being a total moron for starters by not checking Karl's level of clued in to this, and so he's this white plantation owner coded guy in his shiny white suit, torturing a black guy who isn't even on the same level as him for info he doesn't have, and could in no way be resonably expected to know. So it's doubly cruel. Although in some respects Asmodeus's coding makes this gratuitous violence a commentary, just like Buddy and Dave being collosal douches to women in the last few episodes was called out in many ways simply by their existence and coding as collosal douches.

Still not nice to watch on screen, especially without even more specific reference to Asmodeus's doucheyness because the stupidity of this dialogue is not helping.

Like did the minions just bring Karl to him and say hey we tracked the Winchesters and Jack this far, he might know more?

Like...

This is the sort of basic intelligence test fail here, that they're not over-thinking this scene in the specific details that you need to not have your main villain parade around displaying total idiocy over.

Like why the Winchesters would book into a motel under "Sam and Dean Winchester and Jack the Nephilim" and then Karl would know that and know what that means.

You can't just drag a normy into the Hell Main Office and torture them for info about Jack when they have no clue who that is.

He literally

can shapeshift

into anything

Go to the Stampede Motel, turn into a pretty girl in a low cut top, and lean on the motel check in desk until you know what you were after.

I'm no longer impressed they found Karl, I'm AMAZED.

Why did they kiiiiill him

Lol Asmodeus is so hammy

what's he sensing

Has he figured out Lucifer is back?

Meanwhile: Sam and Dean voluntarily go to a creepy cabin in the woods with a witch. This is not quite as stupid as Asmodeus was just being.

I am loving the plot development that David Hayden Jones has returned to the show as himself to find Rowena. Like dammit, you were a really cool character I had no interaction with but we coulda had some screen magic for all you know. You may or may not be in this episode as a surprise appearance which as Lizzy said putting MY name in the credits is the "hey it's that guy" fuckery to distract from the fact there's some bigger fuckery at foot (like... aside from the fact I was back to back with OSRIC FUCKING CHAU) because you don't *just* randomly put my very recognisable name in the credits at the start of the episode with Osric unless it's because something's up. So heeey here I am, I'm looking for Rowena, because dangit Ruthie deserves another chance to be in this show.

Daniella is also really slow to realise that Sam just said she was going to be bait. It took until Dean repeated it for her to realise.

She's really pretty though.

She starts choking like several moments before the gas hits her

... is that DHJ?

I mean we're getting a close up on his face but I literally. Do. Not. Recognise. Him.

I remember rambling at some point in my watching notes in season 12 when his face was being particularly hilarious after I'd seen con photos of DHJ that Ketch is one of the most effective character disguises I've ever seen for an actor's face. TBH it's the same weird different face thing I get from Alex Calvert - that he's all clean shaven and filmed as a wee nougat child in the show but he has an instagram of unrecognisable smouldering glamour shots, often with scruff. DHJ has a beard and that's his face, and part of the Ketch look was being clean shaven and crammed in a tight collar which is an incredibly British upper class twit look, and even in other clothes later the illusion lasted... But add a beard and stop grooming his hair and he just turns into some other person entirely.

Ah well, Dean gets to punch DHJ with Ketch's accent again which must be satisfying for him.

Did they take DHJ back to the Bunker? Really?

Oh he doesn't have the tattoo

LOL he's his "twin" "brother"... Obviously.

Yeah okay whatever you say, DHJ.

elizabethrobertajones Hey what if DHJ was actually Rowena

mittensmorgul oh god, don't give them ideas

ALSO if you have an "evil twin brother" you would generally assume that this sort of thing would happen a lot and you'd try and clarify sooner? I bring up my twin like every other time I talk about myself.

Also this is a ridiculous concept I refuse to engage with

I mean, thematically, wowsers. Fits right in with Buddy and Dave and things that look like other things

ALSO DHJ has been going around torturing witches so it's not like he's been the good twin

ALSO WHY IS HE HERE?

Apparently he's a hitman hunter

I suppose it's kind of like Bela but I do find it really strange.

Like how does anyone even know to hire him if no one knows monsters exist? Who is pointing him at these things?

Insinuating himself into situations like Bela to get work maaay be a way to do it, like if the Winchesters showed up in town and immediately told the sheriff what was up and then offered their fee as contractors or something. Pfft.

Pfft.

And then he's like "we hunters" because he's trying to bond with them or something

To google!

It's convenient he kept a beard his whole life

Oh okay Sam stole hard drives from the BMoL and is using their actual data.

I like the side by sides of their report cards where the prop people literally did them backwards from each other. "*More effort required!" they say about Alexander, and "Excellent work!" for Arthur.

Dean isn't buying it

LOL they dumped Ketch's corpse into the waste canal.

Do you want a haunted Bunker? That's how you get a haunted Bunker.

Anyway Dean is like NOPE don't believe it and Sam's like... there's so much proof... and then he goes in to question DHJ again and DHJ is like... you literally saw me get shot in the head last season, you don't trust that? And Sam's like no I had to concede that Dean had a point that we really can't trust anything and I guess Cas did just randomly come back or something and we have horrific problems with the white men on this show coming back again for completely random reasons that make no sense so you had better bloody well actually be re-introducing Rowena into the narrative even more dramatically than the warning Billie gave about the red-headed witch that Dean probably didn't tell me about now come to think of it, but I'd still like to see her again because we had a sort of weird thing we never really talked about going on...

Also are they keeping DHJ in the store room that showed up for the pencil scene but isn't the other store room? It looks like a different part of the Bunker repurposed.

Sam mis-reads Ketch, maybe because he never knew him as well as Mary or even Dean saw him. DHJ is like dude I played him for a year and psychoanalysed him and his crush on Dean in multiple interviews, so trust me when I tell you all his character exposition.

The stuff about being loyal to Heaven - I mean the BMoL - and being a company man echo what Ishim said about old Cas in 12x10

DHJ like, I did so much character work in those interviews, and I never got a chance for Ketch to be sympathetic so let me offer some more insight on him now you have me in the worst interview chair ever.

Also, don't go into pop culture journalism, Sam

"If he were here, he'd admit regret to some of the things he did to your family"

Yeah unless you have a magic twin link (well... not unlikey tbh with random ass canon pulls) you're either Arthur Ketch or just DHJ enjoying doing interviews about Ketch to a twisted and weird level and I'm sort of gonna have to do an intervention on this for him.

CAS

NEW PLAYGROUND

New angel!

mittensmorgul dumas? that's the name the superwiki has linked, but her page is blank

elizabethrobertajones Heh 3 musketeers again first in the off-brand nougat now that

"If we had him he wouldn't be imprisoned he'd be put to work"

SHE WANTS NEW ANGELS

I don't freakin blame her

But Jack shouldn't be "put to work" either - he would have to want to do it.

Awww Cas getting protective over Jack before I'm done typing that of course this means Jack would be forced to do it and the angel says "No other choice" because of course she does.

As usual heaven isn't comic book evil but its purposes in the name of "good" are super shady. Even if Jack was pure evil himself, Heaven enslaving a powerful nephilim for its own purposes would be dodgy.

Btw I am still torn about Cas's compulsion to care about Jack but on the other hand I am really enjoying Cas generally existing and being alive - and wait a minute she didn't even ask about how he was doing that - so I'm pretty much enjoying the surface level about Cas and Jack right now. Because of course I see the good in Jack that he DOES need protecting, so however Cas ended up on this, at least he is doing the right thing and taking the right stance.

"Castiel, he's not your pet. He belongs to all of us."

Uhoh, Cas is probably going to get grabbed.

*surprise*

Hey he did pretty well considering he's fighting 3 angels and is much weaker than them.

Oh boy, here's Lucifer. This is gonna go great.

Does Cas or Lucifer need to start this with the "you're supposed to be dead/in the AU" first?

Lol, Cas is the first person in this entire damn episode to actually ask a relevant question, and it's one we already know the answer to

*waves a little flag for Cas though*

Hey and then Lucifer asks about Cas being alive, what do you know.

He then calls Cas "cowboy" and pretends like Cas wouldn't kick his ass.

I am pretty happy about the "cowboy" thing :P

Lucifer has found a tan jacket somewhere, specifically one that looks like the one Jack was wearing but maybe a bit thicker, more like Cas's new coat. He's trying to edge in on this family and I can only assume this is not even a veiled metaphor for the douchey biological father wanting to be all interested in his son's business.

Lucifer in a tan jacket makes me think wolf in sheep's clothing.

He does, however, shelve the issue of child custody for now, and he appears to be genuinely freaked out enough about Michael to make that a priority and tell Cas about it, because if you want help against Michael, we've had 2 references to Team Free Will in short succession and that was a phrase coined specifically to spite Michael...

I don't think Lucifer should be allowed in, remotely, because it's become a family term, but the imagery is interesting anyway that he is trying to leech off the success of TFW to accomplish the goals he could never do himself. Especially because it was blatant in season 5 to everyone but him that Michael would kick his butt since he already did it once before and nothing has changed, 12x12 confirmed Michael would kill him slowly, and now meeting an AU Michael, he discovers that yep Michael sure is stronger than him, even when he was the last strong archangel left, and then Michael took that from him...

None of this, however, makes Lucifer sympathetic or good, just self-interested in not dying, and who is better at not dying than Cas?

I mean he wasn't even expecting to see Cas here, I guess he was going to a heaven portal to try and get them to listen?

LOL Kingdom Beer sign over Cas and Lucifer having a chat in a bar.

Cas looks Weary.

"I came back from the dead to deal with THIS? Please take me back to yesterday when it was fun kinky cowboy times with Dean."

I'm glad Cas isn't remotely friendly to Lucifer and is quick to remind him about how killed he got last time they hung out. Lucifer continues to be whiny and annoying about it all, unrepentant for killing Cas over petty nonsense.

LOL Lucifer is like "this Michael is much more powerful"

buddy. dude. go watch 12x12 then get back to me about how whooped your butt would have been. I mean go look at that lovely painting of him whooping your butt that was in 12x12 and unrelated to the fact he had that fucking lance in the first place.

Anyway he's trying to convince Cas to use his influence on Jack to get them to be the ultimate team up but they're fundamentally incapable of doing that because they're the 2 rival dads for Jack and blatantly symbolically being shown as that in these costumes, and that's one of the huge thematic things.

Cas like "You are the Weakest Link, goodbye."

I love Cas being so snarky, so maybe Lucifer being around is good in some respects, that it makes Cas this snarky because he has something to bounce off as awful and despised as Lucifer. Not even Crowley got THIS dismissive treatment, because they had emotional baggage that was of a whole different sort, whereas Cas and Lucifer have been opposite mirrors the whole time since season 4

Lucifer is emphasising how he and Cas are the big cosmic powers around here, with Jack. Hm...

Lol Cas is like "I'm calling my guys who deal with these things" and Lucifer bangs his head on the table in despair. I guess this is like the boy who called wolf except that instead of calling wolf he was literally going around eating all the sheep and was banned from being a shepherd for life and locked away and got out and ate more sheep and was locked away and got out and ate more sheep and got locked away and THEN came back like oh hi something's gonna eat all our sheep.

Lucifer then says Cas needs him and that he needs Cas and they all need Jack.

So Um I guess "Need" is The Worst Word right now :P

"Jack. Your son's name is *Jack*" *pats Cas's hair*

Pfft themes "is he a chip off the old block?" "thankfully, no. he seems to favour the mother"

Theeeeeeeeemes

Cas squinting when he lies - I don't think that's his lying tell because he does it too much, but perhaps uncertainty. The fact he squinted so much in the reintroduction huggy scene last episode feels to me less like lying and more like no clue what was going on and how mad he had to be about his humans sacrificing for him to come back.

Laughing at all their labelled phones lying around permanently charging. I think this is the first proof we've ever seen that they have a Bobby phone bank, but I can't imagine who would rely on the Winchesters to answer the phone when they need proof of ID :P They're like ALWAYS being abducted or disappearing on cases.

Or dying.

Okay so the phones are more just for their personal IDs for the cards THEY give out and they're just getting a call back from the motel for some reason, I suppose because Jack was with them (seriously. Dean gave the motel the name Jack? I have to assume Jack said his name before they could re-name him on the fly and so he was registered as a guest there as Jack the Nephilim because why the fuck not... Berens has a magic skill of un-fucking Buckleming canon but it seems Buckleming's skill is fucking up poor Davy's, in 12x13 and 12x17 and now here...)

ANYWAY jesus christ Asmodeus is stupid. "Evil Colonel Sanders" literally walked in and abducted Karl in person which means that his stupid ass questions weren't even because his minions brought him the guy and presented him in an idiotic way, but our shapeshifting villain wandered in and took Karl, himself in person with his own freaking face that the Winchesters KNEW and is extremely memorable, and took his prize.

...

DHJ better turn out to be Asmodeus even though I think their screentime overlapped and this makes no freaking sense since he has some established history wandering around attacking witches before they caught up with him.

I'd rather have a time plothole than a stupid plothole :P

Anyway DHJ is hanging out with them in the library eating a sandwich because... um

reasons?

At least he's in chains.

Oh my god I said that sarcastically moments before Sam said it sincerely and then pointed out there's no bathroom in the armoury

what the fuck

Like I said up top: as stupid as the villain is, your main characters have to be about as dumb as they are, either only just enough to outwit them, or more stupid if they get outwitted...

Poor Sammy, he was having such a fantastic season

Dean just straight up pretends Mary is phone when DHJ asks because why the heck would you monologue your sad life story to the bad guy, and give him emotional leverage over you? Especially when he ASKS because "Alexander" should have no knowledge of Mary or care about her, but then he also shouldn't know the DHJ interview details of Ketch's inner life.

YAY Dean and Cas are talking and Dean phoned Cas probably just to hear a sane voice because Cas is managing to weave around being Buckleminged, so far, possibly just because he was not in the opening half of the episode, and then this was a really important conversation they couldn't fuck up so probably got supervised.

elizabethrobertajones tee hee Cas standing by the gents to take a call from Dean wait hang on ... I'm not even being jokey I literally just had that moment in the chat with you :P *rewinds* Longing retcon Confirmed Oh dear that is hilarious I don't know if that's the moment you wanted me to see or not but I'm delighted :P

elizabethrobertajones Cas was standing away from Lucifer ready to take Dean's phone call and had to have walked off up to a minute before he called, but most likely in that time when Dean was like UGH I need to talk to Cas and hear the one sane voice in this episode and Cas was like... Brb I... have to use... the 'Gents' and got up and wandered off to take the call eat it, 12x10 and that "where's my phone" moment I mean Buckleming introduced it to fill a plothole so why should they not use it to cover more plotholes at their leisure

... did Speight know? I mean he coulda been like what the heckeroo, and added Cas getting the call and legging it from the table.

The only other option I can think of is Cas decided he may as well just get up to "go pee" because Lucifer is so annoying that pretending he needs to go to the loo buys him 5 minutes to let his migraine subside.

Also what the fuck DHJ was wandering around the bunker so he could use the bathroom. I am confused. Is this actually like... being hinted at. Like, "hey children, please remember who does and doesn't need to use the bathroom in this episode"

Omg

Cas like "I would *like* to see you too" is he literally pretending he and Dean were canoodling on the phone as a cover?

I hate everything

Anyway need/want blah blah I have been over that a lot lately :P Cas is using his DESIRE to see Dean to get help, by Lucifer saying he NEEDS Cas.

"Smooth was never your strong suit" oh my god Lucifer also thought Cas was pretending to be flirty too what is going on

why has this episode confirmed all the headcanons about Cas being the most shittiest phone sex guy ever

of all the things.

why.

DHJ wants to go because he misses being in on the action with the guys

Like. No, go take your sandwich and sit down.

Dean is sad about Cas always getting killed by Lucifer and stuff when he does stupid things.

Cas's "ugh stop talking Lucifer" face is a whole layer more existential misery than dealing with Crowley... I think he was secretly fond of Crowley or at least enjoyed hating him, whereas Lucifer is just EXHAUSTING.

He's needling Cas for attention.

LOL randomly Asmodeus as if Cas's headache wasn't bad enough, now we got thunder and lightning and very very frightening...

Pfft.

bahahaha Lucifer called Asmodeus the dim bulb

I mean he's not wrong, Asmodeus has been completely idiotic all episode. And of course, narratively, his "evil plans" are just self-interest which will endanger the entire world because even if Lucifer is a twat, he has a point about the coming danger of Michael, and Asmodeus just refuses to see the danger, which is all kinds of various political commentary, and using his era aesthetic to say this kind of thinking is such a throwback...

I think this might be the most confused Cas has ever been about if he should stab someone or not - if he actually WANTS to defend Lucifer. Not really, but Asmodeus seems like a bigger problem because at least Lucifer isn't trying to kill him.

I hope this just randomly gets Asmodeus killed.

Or Lucifer

Asmodeus just called Lucifer "screwable"... do they even know what they said? :P

EEEP there was a Margiekugel sign and it just flickered off

"Nick's bar" pfft because Lucifer?

It seems like Sam and Dean are too late and Asmodeus already made off with everyone?

I hope Cas is okay

being held captive by that idiot seems like a fate worse than death. You're going to get villain monologues all day.

Anyway fight fight fight

Good fight.

Where did DHJ even come from?

that was a ridiculous nonsense about how he escaped. I also will die if he took Dorothy's bike and not his own left stashed there. Also he nodded at Dean like hey you didn't cavity search me like you should have, which... Is he actually Ketch?

He's actually Ketch

Of course that means Dean knows him very well and trusted his gut instinct on knowing Ketch to prove that he was not, in fact, the actor David Hayden Jones, chillaxing on set and being weirdly cheerful about being beaten up by the Winchesters.

Pfft he used Rowena's charm to get alive again

Well she better be fine if they're gonna use her like this.

"Is she?"

LOL Ketch ninja'd out of there

Oh good it wasn't Dorothy's bike

Considering how they use Rowena, DON'T use Mary, etc I'd have taken Dorothy's bike as a personal insult. I guess Ketch rode his over to the Bunker before 12x22.

I mean at least this means Ketch remembers he got shot and then also he revived in a sewer where he belonged because he is garbage.

Wait. He set up this whole thing in like a month or so TOPS since he got shot? If he’s been chasing witches has he even had TIME for a side business?

Oh boy, Asmodeus using Cas's voice to talk to Dean.

BAD HELLO DEAN.

That "see you soon" is also way too cheerful. It should be as much of a tip off as Cas begging Dean to come help him in the previous call.

I hope Dean sees through it.

Though it's so Buckleming-y I don't think people should be mad if he doesn't because this was them doing a smart!Dean episode.

PFFT of course they team up - colonialism from all sorts of fun angles!! The ultimate trashy white guys in suits team up.

Thanks Buckleming!

Man, I need a whole pot of detox tea now. I don't even have closing thoughts.

#13x07 #my stuff #season 13 spoilers #buckleming appropriate wank for ts #*quietly lies face down on the floor*

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fantasticworldoffanfics · 7 years

Text

DEREK/STILES

Fandom: TeenWolf

Just an extended must read list of awesome fanfics that is in no particular order :) ...

top favourites, more top favourites

In The Woods Somewhere

Author: WithMyTeeth (Ylith)

Summary: Peter travels with various carnivals, showcasing a massive black wolf he parades as a man-eating beast. In his caravan he keeps Stiles, his most precious possession who is much more special than he may outwardly appear. Stiles feels a kinship with the creature through their mutual captivity, so when he makes his escape he frees the wolf as well. Like Stiles though, the wolf is also more than he appears

Five Days of Dickings

Author: drunktuesdays, mklutz, the_ragnarok

Summary: Five Dickings in Five Days was the (hopefully interim) title he’d seen on the contract. More like five days of dickings. Whatever, Stiles was into it. The money is great; the fucking is also great. It’s a win-win way to pay for college.

Wolf Pack: Beacon Original

Author: Beerwolves, fearfrost1211

Summary: When his father landed the Deputy Chief of police position in Beacon Hills, Stiles moved to his new town gladly, embracing the chance of a fresh start. What he didn’t expect was to find himself hopelessly drawn to the gruff Vice President of the local motorcycle gang, the Wolf Pack. Derek Hale, resident bad boy of Beacon Hills, spent his time helping his sister lead the Wolf Pack and working on motorcycles at his family’s automotive garage. Then, one hot summer afternoon a bright-eyed boy walked into his life and turned his world upside down.

And That's a Wrap

Author: the_problem_with_stardust

Summary: An insanely attractive guy and his terrifying dog move into the Preserve. Too bad Stiles is a magnet for embarrassing situations.

Comprehensive Study in Getting a Boyfriend via Persuasive Essay-Writing

Author: Luddleston

Summary: Stiles is a junior Journalism major who takes Rhetorical Strategies because it covers his English requirement. He's also trying to be subtle about the way he keeps checking out his professor. Derek is a grad student teaching his first class ever. He also has the most annoying student on the face of the planet, and is donereading essays about the history of male circumcision. Flirty e-mails are exchanged, Stiles spends way too much time in Derek's office, and they fall in love over a mutual hatred for APA formatting.

The Rose and the Wolf

Author: xxjinchuurikixx

Summary: For who could ever learn to love a Beast? Stiles takes his father's place as a Beast's prisoner in an enchanted castle.

Home

Author: coffeeinallcaps

Summary: Derek has bought a beautiful house. Stiles can't stay away. (In which everyone hangs out at Derek's place all the time and Stiles tries but fails not to fall for a certain socially inept alpha.)

(Not So) Pure Imagination

Author: theroguesgambit

Summary: "There is a world where whenever someone fantasizes about you, you can physically feel it, but you have no idea who is thinking it about you."Stiles knows it's wrong, but he's been Fantasizing about Derek and he can't bring himself to stop. Derek doesn't know who's taken an interest in him, but he's enjoying it way more than he probably should.

Forbidden Forest (eat you up)

Author: kishmet

Summary: Okay, so technically werebunny Stiles isn't supposed to wander around in the woods at night. But creative interpretation happens to be one of Stiles' special talents.

Happiness is Not a Horse, You Cannot Harness it

Author: otter

Summary: Derek's expecting the new guy. He's expecting another mostly-useless college kid who doesn't know one end of a horse from the other, and Derek doesn't have the time to babysit. What he's not expecting is Stiles Stilinski, who carries on conversations with the livestock and gets maybe a little too chummy with Isaac and is really kind of stupidly perfect in every way. And it's just distracting, that's all.

On Job Training

Author: suzvoy

Summary: Stiles finally gets the practical experience he's been looking for. It's safe to say it doesn't happen even remotely the way he was expecting. AKA, pretend boyfriends! With a twist!

The Searching Ceremonies Series

Author: KouriArashi

Part 1: Divided We Stand

Summary: Derek is being pressured by his family to pick a mate, and somehow stumbles into a choice that they didn't expect and aren't sure they approve of....

Part 2: United We Mend

Summary: Sequel to Divided We Stand. Six months have gone by, Stiles is slowly recovering from his injuries, and the Searching Ceremony is about to happen. This time it's Cora who brings someone home, but he might not be what he seems...

Part 3: Together We Build

Summary: Everything has settled down after the last Searching Ceremony. Stiles decides to tackle a cold case that his father gives him - a 10 year old murder caused by a rejected werewolf bite. Meanwhile, Derek is trying to solve an even bigger mystery - what's going on between Uncle Peter and Sheriff Stilinski, and how much does he have to worry about it?

Part 4: Forever We Strive

Summary: When Peter and Sheriff Stilinski decide to adopt a child, they meet a little girl named Malia, whose parents were murdered. But when Stiles starts looking into who killed them, he finds a lot of unanswered questions.

Ever After

Author: Sybilina

Summary: Four years ago, Stiles left Beacon Hills, to go to college, to get away from the pack, to try to mend a broken heart. He thought he'd succeeded but right when graduation came around, his whole world fell apart. Again. There's only so many times Stiles can deal with his world falling down around him. This was one time too many.It isn't about getting the girl, or the guy, because romance and lovey feelings aren't a cure for depression.

Play It Again Series

Author: metisket

Part 1: Play It Again

Summary: In which Stiles goes along with one of Derek’s plans and ends up in an alternate universe as a result. He should’ve known better. He did know better, actually, and that means he has no one to blame but himself.“Laura wants to lure the kid in with food and kindness and make a pet of him, like a feral cat. Derek wants to have him arrested for stalking. They’re at an impasse. (And the rest of the family is staying emphatically out of it in a way that suggests bets have been placed.)”

Part 2: This Doesn’t Hurt

Summary: Melissa isn’t sure how she accidentally adopted a teenager, but she’s confident that somehow, it’s all Stiles Stilinski’s fault.

Derek Hale: Werewolf Cop Series

Author: the_deep_magic

Part 1: CherryBomb

Summary: Stiles is yanked up to his feet so fast that his world spins and his shoulder aches and he’s a second from screaming police brutality! when he gets a good look at the cop’s face.Holy shit. Stiles was just tackled to the ground by a fucking underwear model with a badge.

Part 2: Service Weapon

Summary: It is 100% against Beacon Hills Sheriff’s Office policy to allow two officers engaged in a romantic relationship to be partners. It is also 100% accurate that no one else on the force can last more than three days in a car with Stiles without begging for either a ball gag or the sweet release of death.

Scent Marking For Dummies

Author: Hatteress (goddammitstacey)

Summary: Stiles is almost used to being chased around the school by werewolves at this point. Having to share a bed with Derek freaking Hale, on the other hand, is just needlessly complicating his life.

The Right Number

Author: kyaticlikestea

Summary: When Stiles Stilinski's phone gets switched at the gym, he really just wants it back. The last thing he's expecting is to fall hopelessly in lust with the guy who's got his phone.So, of course, that's exactly what happens.

All You Ever Needed To Know About Knotting

Author: KuriKuri

Summary: Derek had started reading the column by accident. Really, reading strangers’ questions about knotting and heat had never really appealed to him. However, at that point in time, he was a little desperate.And he was right: most of the questions submitted by anonymous readers didn’t appeal to him. The answers, though, did.(Or: In which Stiles writes an advice column about knotting and Derek is smitten. Also they're neighbors.)

Show Me The Way Back Home Baby

Author: stilinskisparkles

Summary: In which Lydia and Jackson produce the world's cutest baby, and the pack goes crazy-- the good kind of crazy. Except for Derek, who is afraid of tiny cute babies and Stiles who plans to be the best Uncle ever. Even if Danny called dibs on Godfather.

Dating Backwards

Author: RemainNameless

Summary: Pornstars Derek and Stiles work for the same company. Derek only shoots with werewolves and Stiles only shoots with humans. That's not going to change after they meet. It's really not. (It might.)

Dirty Paws and Furry Coats

Author: queerly_it_is

Summary: Stiles is eight years old when his dad brings Derek home.[AU based on Disney's The Fox and the Hound]

This Is Home

Author: raisesomehale

Summary: Other than being a werefox with a werekit for a son, Stiles' life is relatively normal. He's a single parent, owns a modest sized home, and has a variety of kid-friendly meal recipes tucked neatly under his belt. It might be just him and Nate, but they have it in the bag. Nothing is missing from their lives.That is, until Nate befriends a girl named Sadie Hale on his first day of kindergarten. Then everything changes.

Adventures and Explorations Series

Author: Survivah

Part 1: A Simple Life

Summary: Derek plans to spend the rest of his life holed up in the woods after Laura dies. Then he meets a stubborn young fox, and the stubborn young fox meets an urn of Deaton's magic powder, and his plans change.

Part 2: Finding Miracles

Summary: Stiles was planning on just being a fox for his entire life. Then, well, magic, true love, blah blah blah, things got complicated. But as it turns out, he still has a lot to learn about this new world he's living in. Humanity, man. It's weird.

Knot if You Don't Knock

Author: jsea, marguerite_26

Summary: Stiles never expects to present as an omega -- that's something that happens to people like Greenberg, not him. He is so wrong. His life only gets stranger when Derek Hale mistakenly bursts through the door of his exam room during a doctor’s appointment. What happens next is a complicated series of events, including freshly baked cookies, book-carrying and surprise heats.

Sweet Tooth

Author: Spikedluv

Summary: Derek Hale had returned to Beacon Hills and the ice cream place was reopening. “Best. Day. Ever,” Stiles told Scott.

Oh God, He's Hot

Author: lupus

Summary: When Stiles came home a couple of days before junior year started from a summer away, he was a little more than excited to see his best friend Derek, especially now that he’d finally gotten the courage to act upon his long standing crush on the guy. There’s just one problem; somewhere in the span of three months puberty hit Derek like the bus hit Regina George and all of the sudden Derek is hot. And Stiles isn’t the only one who’s noticed.

Worth Series

Author: holdin_out_4a_hero

Part 1: You’re Worth It

Summary: "NO WAY! Her sons coming here?”Danny sighed dreamily. “Yeah, the Stiles Stilinksi. The young model that made it big on accident with his moms camera. The L.A. heartthrob that has actually never dated anyone, and no one knows what he does over summer, and yet he still manages to keep the hearts of young Americans easily.”“So why’s he coming here?” Scott asked, remembering that the entire Stilinski family was loaded with money, given the success of every single one of them, and yet Stiles would be coming to the middle of nowhere, for a random school that offered nothing.“Who knows? His parents are from here, but they’re not coming here with him. I have no idea, but honestly? I’m not complaining.”

Part 2: You’re Worth Everything

Summary: Stiles loves Derek, Derek loves Stiles... if it's meant to be, why does it seem so hard to get it to be?

The Awkward and Sometimes Painful Life of Genim Hale

Author: BlueRunawayMoon

Summary: Stiles is a writer of gay erotica whose work, according to his Editor (one miss Lydia Martin) has gotten dull and boring. Lydia suggest's that Stiles try to LIVE a little, gain some new juicy experiences that he can write about and bring the heat up again. Only problem is Stiles is a bit on the dorky side and not good with 'living a little'. After a whole slew of embarrassing situations brought on by his best(sometimes!) friend Scott, he's given some wise advice and decides to take a tropical paradise vacation. All's going good and well, and he's got a major crush on his super hot tour guide Danny. Yet it seem's like he can't stop bumping into Derek, who, as annoying and brooding as he seem's, also makes it quite clear he WANTS Stiles. As in...wants wants. With the two being brought together almost by fate, Stiles discover's that Derek is more than he seems....WAY more.

The Christmas Raffle

Author: mikkimouse

Summary: Every year, the royal Hale family raffles off a Christmas dinner with Prince Derek to raise money for charity. But this year, the winner is the second chance Derek didn't know he was looking for.

Kings Of The Moonlight

Author: thelogicoftaste

Summary: Derek is the newly single father to his only son, Isaac Argent Hale, and he finds himself having to move back to his home town of Beacon Hills to escape the insanity of his ex. It's in the middle of all this upheaval, the crazy mess that his life has become that he meets Stiles. Crazy, beautiful Stiles.

more fics: part 2

#fanfics #fanfic #fanfiction #sterek #teenwolf #derek hale #stiles stilinski

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8bitcat · 7 years

Text

Graduation

@lets-play-pripara i’ve had this brewing in my head since you changed hikari’s hairstyle

---

It was a big change. Of course it would be.

Hikari sat there, staring at herself in the mirror, silver hair flowing down behind her. On her vanity sat all kinds of things. It was rather messy, really. She didn’t have time to clean it up. All kinds of makeup she was promoting, ridiculous gimmicky products, and just assorted trash.

But all the junk on the surface before her formed a sort of clean halo around two tacky-looking ribbons. Covered in polka dots, refusing to go with any outfit. It was just like her, in a way. Bold. Always doing her own thing, and giving 110% with it.

She’d had these for ages now. Absolutely forever. How old was she when she first got them? Young. Really young. God, those days were hell. But that didn’t matter now. As far as she was concerned, the Hikari of the now was who she was. And that’s who she had always been.

Oh, but if she could convince herself of that.

In a way, the ribbons were something that pulled her through life. A rope she clung to as she was dragged through the muck and the mire, hoping, believing, praying that something would be on the other side. And she didn’t know. That was the scariest part.

But here she was. A Divine Idol. She and NightLight were plastered on magazines, billboard ads, every single day was booked with TV appearances and lives galore. It was like being a real world idol all over again.

She wondered what defined being a “real world idol”. She didn’t change much upon entering PriPara. Sure, she’d made a few alterations. Tried some things. She was particularly a big fan of the new beauty mark on her cheek. But her ribbons...

That’s right. Her ribbons. The whole reason she was sitting here. The ribbons made her who she was. Tacky as they were, they were hers. They what made her feel like...Hikari. They were always there for her-

Right?

No, not anymore. Well, that wasn’t completely true. She loved the ribbons for all they had given her. And of course, she made them look good. She made everything look good! But...now they only served to remind her of a past. A past of yelling and screaming and hurting and crying and...ugh.

Hikari got up from the vanity. She was spending too much time thinking about this. She had things to do. She spun on her heel back to face the vanity-and twitched at the dotted fabric. Maybe today she’d wear her hair down. Always good to have a change of pace now and then, right?

She stuffed the ribbons into her pocket, and hurried out the door.

---

“You’re just like a pile of sand. Slip through my grasp, I just can’t-”

“My face is burning up, so let’s start turning up-”

“It’s like my body is not in my control.”

Hikari finished the performance with a pose, coord still glowing. She had done a small solo performance to tease NightLight’s new album “Morning/Noon/Night”, and after that would be a short Q&A, and then she could have an hour to herself before the next gig.

Everything went smoothly, as always. She had this type of stuff down to a science at this point. Blah blah blah, I love my fans, blah blah blah, inspired by whosie whatsit, a new kind of blah blah blah feel.

“So, Hikari, would you mind telling us why you wore your hair down today?”

Hikari froze. She wasn’t expecting that. And it was a perfectly innocent question. Her braided pigtails were unique to her. That was her Look. It was reasonable to ask. But it felt so...acidic. She looked at the Meganee before her. Her face was plastered with the same cheerful, warm smile. Why did it look so menacing.

Hikari choked.

“U-Uhm, w-well, y-you, uh, y-you know.” She coughed lightly, already sweating. Was it hot in here? “I-I’m t-trying t-t-t-t-t-to, uhm, f-fi-er...I-I th-thought mayb-be I-I’d try someth-th-thing n-new?” Calm down, Hikari. Don’t freak out. Not yet. Meganee’s face went from her stock “happy” to her stock “mild concern”.

“Hmmm? Are you feeling well, Hikari?” The audience chatter seemed to dissolve into concerned murmurs, which did nothing to serve her nerves. Oh God. Oh God. Keep it cool, Hikari. Just relax. Breathe normally. That’s not normally. THAT’S NOT NORMALLY.

“U-Uhm, y-yes, I-I’m fine. I-I’m s-sorry, I-I d-didn’t g-get much s-s-s-s-sleep l-last ni-ight.” She continued to stumble, forcing a smile and a small laugh. Well, it wasn’t a COMPLETE lie. But that seemed to throw Meganee off the scent trail. Or at least she made Hikari THINK she’d been thrown off. But her face returned to the calm smile it always was, and that’s all that mattered.

“Oh! I’m sorry to hear that. But you’ll be able to get plenty of sleep after the show, because we are out of time! Join us next week when we have the hottest unit on the block, Wonder Cafe, come in to tell us what the difference between ‘furry’ and ‘kemono’ is!” Hikari sighed with relief as Meganee began the ending spiel. The audience erupted into applause when the ‘applause’ sign appeared, Hikari waved and bowed, and then returned backstage.

She practically collapsed in her chair, as Meganee came around to powder her face. Her Idol Watch buzzed, and she looked down to see what was up. It was the group chat.

midnightluna: hey? are you okay? i just saw you on the show, and you seemed a little off. everything alright?

Hikari smiled, appreciative of her friend. She began to type, when another speech bubble appeared.

superduperfunsunsunshine: yeh yeh, hikari-chwaaaan! :3 :D :O r u okaaaaaay? we wan 2 make sherbert that ur totes fine!!! <3 <3 <3

Hikari raised a silver eyebrow. She never quite got the hang of understanding how Hinode texted. But it was cute.

apollo13: Yeah guys, I’m fine. Thanks. I really appreciate it.

midnightluna: ok, if you say so. just make sure you take it easy if you don’t feel well. remember the time hinode ate an entire wedding cake before joining the pripara triathalon?

apollo13: She threw up on my shoes. My Brilliant Prince Limited Edition 2015 4th Collection PR Boots.

superduperfunsunsunshine: u guis r meen!!!!! >:C

Hikari laughed, closing the watch and putting it back in her pocket. Her fingers brushed something. Oh right. The ribbons. Ugh, they were chasing her. She stared at herself in the vanity mirror that was nothing like the one at home (mostly due to a distinct lack of clutter). Well, if she was going to put them in, now was the time.

She sighed, figuring “trying a new look” could wait for another day. She raised the ribbon up, taking a strand of her hair and-

Mud.

The flashback bolted through her mind. The day she got the ribbons. They day she got pushed in the mud. Something that clung to her for better and for worse. Was she tearing up. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it. She stuffed the ribbons back in her pocket and wiped her tears before anyone could see.

She had to get out. And that’s exactly what she did, ghosting her way through the crowds of Meganees and other idols and out into PriPara Town prior.

She had to get out.

---

Well, that would never work. Hikari poked her head out from the bushes. A bunch of idols were doing a photoshoot RIGHT in front of the gate. All she wanted was to run home, turn off all the lights, and hide under the blankets and maybe cry for an hour. She stormed off in frustration, still taking the stealthy route. But now she was ANGRY and stealthy.

She found herself in a small garden. Which, in PriPara, was not anything new. PriPara was 90% plant life at this point. It was empty, thank God. At least here, maybe she could get some time alone with her thoughts. Which was actually probably definitely a bad idea but hey everyone has their coping mechanisms shut up.

It was pretty peaceful here, actually. The sound of trickling water from a babbling brook just out of sight. Little flowers blooming here and there. It was nice, serene even. Hikari found herself walking over to a small apple tree in the corner. Her foot gently bumped against the tree, an apple wobbling precariously. And with a gentle ‘snap’, it fell from its branch, right onto the head of the gardener who had been tending to the small area.

“UGYAH!” She shrieked in pain as the apple came down on her head, appearing from seemingly nowhere. Hikari did the rational thing, which was, of course, to scream as well. Which only made the pink-haired gardener shriek even louder. Which in return, scared Hikari even more, and this just devolved into a full minute of exchanging screams.

“Uuuu...uuu...that super duper mega hurt, da vinci...” Fingers reached up, to rub the bump that formed under the pink head of hair.

“I-I’m so sorry! I-I really didn’t mean to-” Hikari started, leaning down to check if the person was okay. Something felt oddly familiar, but the moment they turned around, Hikari saw it. “UGYO-!?”

“Hmmm?” Ajimi Kigi turned around to face Hikari, and her eyes immediately lit up. “Mama mia, that’s a spicy meatball! Hikarin, Hikarin, the super-duper mega ultra kirakirariiiiin! A modern day Monet, the apple of my eye! It’s been so long, da vinci~!” She immediately leapt into all out yelling mode, bouncing left and right and to and fro around Hikari, who was really not in the mood for any of this.

“K-Kigi-san, hello.” Hikari blushed, a bit overwhelmed by all this. Ajimi got real up close and personal very quickly, and Hikari forced her hands to her sides to keep from pushing her away.

“Hello, da vinci? This is much more than hello! This is hurrah, hail, howdy, and hallelujah! Sweet Andy Warhol, you’re positively Popping with radiance!” Kigi sang. “It seems like just yesterday, you were all muddied up like a broken Baroque!” Hikari flinched.

“Uhm-”

“Hmm, Hikyarin? Why aren’t you wearing your ribbons, da vinci?” Hikari clenched a fist. “Were they not Post-Modernist enough? Did they get all Yves Klein’d? Don’t worry, Kigi always has ribbons galore! I’ve got everything you could ever need from Acrylic to Zoetrope! And of course, how could I forget-”

“Maybe I just didn’t want them, okay!?”

Time seemed to stop for a moment. Then two moments. The air turned icy cold, as Hikari seethed with freezing rage. She reached into her pocket, and raised the ribbons up into the air.

“Maybe I don’t need your dumb ribbons anymore! I don’t! They’re ugly and tacky and they don’t go with anything! They’re such a problem! Nobody likes them!”

Ajimi said nothing, but Hikari had plenty to say.

“Oh, so what? The helped me through a tough time!? But now I can’t even look at them without thinking back to everything I had to go through with them! I hate those stupid ribbons! They’re nothing but a symbol of everything I don’t want to be! They’re not me anymore! I don’t need them! I don’t want them! I don’t ever want to see those stupid God damn ribbons ever again because I’m Hikari Amanogawa! Not whatever anyone used to think I was, and not whatever I will be! Nothing else matters but the me that is now!”

Hikari took in one big breath, and screamed to the sky, throwing the ribbons to the ground.

“I’M HIKARI AMANOGAWA!!”

And time started to move again. Mostly with the massive amounts of birds Hikari just scared with that scream. Everything was silent for a moment. Even the water seemed to cease it’s trickle. A realization began to wash over her, and she turned around to face Ajimi.

“O-Oh my God, I’m so sorry-”

She started, but Ajimi raised a finger to her lips. She reached out, running her fingers through Hikari’s long, flowing silver hair. And she smiled.

“Hikari Amanogawa, huh? That’s very Hikari, da vinci.” She laughed. Ajimi strolled past her, picking up the ribbons, dusting the mud off of them. She laughed again.

“You know, it’s performance art, da vinci. When I first met you, you were crying in a mud puddle and didn’t know what to do with yourself. You were...Baroque, as it were. Or maybe rather Gutai.” She paused thoughtfully. “I gave you these ribbons because I thought you needed them...and I guess you did.” Ajimi turned to face Hikari.

“But you don’t need them any more, Hikarinrin. You’ve blossomed and matured into the beautiful young woman you were always meant to be.” Ajimi walked up and placed the ribbons back in Hikari’s hands. “You’re not tied up by these ribbons anymore, Hikari.”

“Even after everything that’s happened, is happening, and will happen. You’re still you.”

Ajimi walked past her, heading for the entrance to the garden. Hikari turned around, and opened her mouth to speak. But Ajimi had already bounced off to some other place. She stared down at the ribbons in her hands.

“I’m still me, huh?”

“I’ll always be me.”

“...”

“I’m Hikari Amanogawa.”

---

“Fuwaaaah! Oh man, what a daaaay.” Luna sighed, collapsing onto the couch in her Pripartment. Hinode smiled, seemingly still a bundle of energy.

“Oh, I thought today was fun!” She smiled, sitting down on the nearest chair.

“Fun, sure. Exhausting, also.” Luna flipped open the Idol Watch, staring at it. “Hmmm, Hikari hasn’t responded to any of our shenanigans in the group chat.”

“Hmmm?” Immediately, Hinode grew worried, as she tended to do. “I hope she’s okay...”

“Hikari’s a strong girl. She’ll be fine. Remember when she placed higher than me at the PriPara Song Festival and I pushed her out of a two-story window?”

“But she wasn’t okay. She broke like two ribs.”

“Two ribs she survived breaking.” Luna tried to make it sound like it was less terrible than it was. In reality, Luna had apologized a minimum of 400 times, brought her as many flowers as her allergies would allow, and was at her bedside 24/7. Even though it was just two broken ribs. “...Maybe I should give her a call, though.”

“No need.” A familiar voice came from the doorway. “Did somebody order fried chicken?”

“I didn’t order but I’d like some.” Luna announced, not looking up from the couch.

“...And a completely new hairstyle!” Hikari walked in, doing a dramatic pose. Hinode’s jaw dropped. Luna didn’t move.

“What. What does it look like.” She said flatly, checking for the newest King of DanPri news. Hinode said nothing, letting the teacup she had picked up shatter on the ground.

“...” Hikari walked out of the room, and then walked back in, posing once more. “And a completely new hairstyle!”

Luna finally rolled over, turning to see the new Hikari. And Luna’s jaw dropped as well.

Hikari’s hair was shorter, but not short. Her characteristic braids were now two small pigtails that sat on her shoulders. It framed her face very nicely, and both made her cuter and gave her a bit more of a mature look. She just looked so much more...like herself.

“Well?” Hikari tapped her foot. She had strolled in here all confident. She did not come here for shocked and baffled gazes. Unless they were baffled in a positive way. Luna sat up a bit, and smiled.

“It’s very...Hikari.”

“Is that a good thing?” Hikari raised an eyebrow. Luna simply laughed.

“Oh, leave her alone.” Hinode scolded Luna, and turned back to Hikari. “But she’s right. It does look very Hikari. It looks like you.”

Hikari stopped for a moment, lowering the bag of fried chicken in her hand. She started tearing up, almost immediately.

“R-really?”

“W-wha-!? Hikari, why are you crying!?” Luna and Hinode immediately rushed to her side, but Hikari couldn’t hide a smile.

“I-I just...” She sniffled. “I-I’m Hikari Amanogawa...”

Neither of them knew what that meant, but they just went in for the hug anyways. Hikari reciprocated, squeezing them tight.

“I love you guys...”

“We love you too, Hikari.”

#glompy says things #pripara #THIS. WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO TURN OUT THAT LONG

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the-green-haired-fellow · 7 years

Text

Green eyes of envy Jerome X Reader

“Shoo kitten I have important business to attend. I don’t need you hanging around my shoulders.. You’re getting in the way.” Jerome stared at me his green eyes glimmering with anger and what I read to be hate. Nodding afraid I backed out of the room Jerome and the others were in. This new group of obsessed cultists that built Jerome up to be a god, having broken Jerome out of Arkham for the whole Bruce Wayne circus thing. Now he was just an uppity, cocky, brat! None of the Gotham officials knew where he was only the fact that he was gone. This made it so we could live fairly comfortably in the mansion of one of the cultists.

At that moment they were all chatting about their great come-out called “Panic! under the disco” the name being a close rip-off but was accepted due to Jerome’s enthusiasm. Unimpressed I stormed back to the room Jerome and I shared slamming myself down on the bed weakly hitting one of the pillows. Mockingly I insulted Jerome with childish remarks like “Rotten Ginger” and “Bitch baby blah blah blah” things he would probably not like to hear. “Oh darling!” He cried happily his footsteps coming down the same hallway I had just stormed down. I sat up acting happy “Yes Jerome?” I said pretending to be happy. He poked his head in the door smiling his usual wide smile. “Oh there you are” I watched him stroll confidently sitting down on the bed in front of me crossing his legs like a child. “I need you to put on the most ravishing and..” he came close to me whispering deeply. ‘and revealing” I smirked watching him put on his show of explaining that I was going to be the main bait. Great. I loved being bait. Like the good girl I am I nodded happily snooping around in the closet for my tight black dress that had crossed strings all the way down the dress stopping in an arrow just before my... girly parts. I absolutely despised wearing revealing clothes it made me feel unattractive and like a caged animal only there to let greasy eyes fantasize about the things they would like to do to me. Jerome watched me put on the dress smirking like an asshole. I carried on flicking my long black and purple hair behind my pale shoulders. walking into the bathroom that connected to the right of our walk in closet.

Jerome didn’t follow only saying “We tango in five!” then left the room. I rolled my eyes applying my make-up faster then I was comfortable with. I settled with a mediocre smokey eye and the overrated winged eyeliner everyone and their grandma wore. When I was satisfied I grabbed a pair of black flat and ran barefoot out the door. I saw black SUV we used as transportation creeping down the driveway. Knowing Jerome would never have them stop for me I began to run at the van the gravel below my feet seeming to rip my sole to pieces. When I got close enough the back door swung open and I was able to dive in panting. I heaved out of breathe looking at Jerome who sat smiling smudgy in the front seat. “I hope you brought other shoes doll, those flats just won’t do.” I looked down worried knowing that I was most likely going to be a cause of one of his legendary melt-downs. He sat up suddenly in his seat peering angrily at me. Without me being aware what was going on a par of heavy black heels was thrown at me striking me hard in the face. Jerome laughed clapping his hands. “Strike one!” turning his attention way from me to the road ahead. I held my stinging cheek breathing deeply to avoid crying. Jerome got off on tears, mine would only get him going more. He had become such an asshole ever since he had his face flailed off, just because he had come back from the dead and has all these new followers didn’t mean he was so high and mighty. I shook the thoughts away pulling on the heels. “Stop huffing and puffing dear it’s not attractive.” I glared at his face which was gazing still out the window. o my surprise he turned his head seeing my hateful glare. I dropped my head hoping he wouldn't say anything, he didn’t having been interrupted the the SUV having it’s breaks slammed.

Jerome bounced up and down excitedly in his chair. “Woo! you ready boys!” He slammed the drivers shoulder. They all jumped out hollering sneaking in through the back to go planting some bomb or do whatever they had planned for the nights festivities. I grunted opening the door and getting out. My ankles wobbled in the heels Jerome had struck me with due to their height and weight. I wandered up the side of the building towards the entrance. It was spray painted with cults and gang sighs, a type of art work that had seemed to be marking every corner of this city. I didn’t know how I felt about that to wbe honest, now I was no goody-goody I had killed more people than most war vets but still I imagined a mother holding her sons hands walking down the street, her son would smile and point to the bit of graffiti asking innocently ‘what is that mommy?’ she would only frown having a feeling that her sons infatuation could lead to involvement and then blam! death by gang member. I wouldn’t want my kids to end up this way. Coming around the front I spotted the doorman, he was young and handsome, easy to woo. I smiled walking up to him. “Gee it’s awful cold out. Do you mind if I step in and warm my hands.” Gently I swirled my hands around his belt feeling his heartbeat quicken. “Su-Sure step right in” I winked walking past him. “Thank you” I would make sure he would live on past tonight. Inside the club was the same as the rest of them baring music, flashing decorations, dumb young people blah, blah, blah. I made my way to the bar ordering three shots of tequila, salt on the rims or each.

The bartender was quick and courteous serving me them up quick so I could down them all feeling the unwelcome burn of hard alcohol. I grimaced at the taste. I took money out of my bra and slid it a crossed the table thanking hi before turning around and mapping everything out. Jerome was no where to be seen only a mass of bobbing heads none of them having the fire red hair he did. I grew lonely at the thought of him not being around but then again I didn’t really ever want to see him when he was around. He had become to cruel ever since he came back to.. dead. almost.

I squinted looking harder, nothing. “Hello miss?” I heard a smooth voice say. I turned to it looking at the face addressing me. He was a thin guy handsome strong jawline, thick black hair. I smiled “How-do-you-do?” I said politely warming up to the stranger. He blushed almost shocked to have my attention. “I’m doing goo-” he dropped his head embarrassed, chuckling to himself quietly. “The real reason I came over here was to ask you to dance. You’re so beautiful and.. alone. It do sent seem right” Now this sounds pathetic but my heart seemed to skip a little. He had the face of a kind hearted man that understood other struggles. I quivered a bit. “S-sure” He led my carefully out to the dance floor reaching the far right corner where it wasn’t to crowded. We faced each other getting into a casual dancing routine, polite and friendly. Neither of us talked very much but we often exchanged looks smiling like fools whenever his happened. A part of me wanted to lay my head on his shoulders to feel his heart beat as well as the sway of his body, but I didn’t not wanting to ruin the moment. I opened my mouth to ask him his name but before I could get it out a voice cracked over the loud speakers. “Good evening ladies and gentleman what a great-” The voice cut out. Squinting i looked towards the speakers that seemed to be projecting the voice. Jerome was standing in top of the tallest speaker microphone in hand, DJ bleeding out next to him. Jerome’s stare seemed to radiate disgust and hate. “Oh Y/N?” he said in a matter of fact tone. I tugged on my new found friends shoulder urging him to leave with me. “Hey someone stop her!” Jerome yelled something like panic wavering in his voice. I grabbed onto the strangers hand harder pushing our way through the mass o confused people.

None of his men could catch us so we were out of the club and out of sight by the time they reached the front door. “You need to get in your car and hurry home” The stranger nodded knowing who Jerome was. Before he turned to leave he closed in on my face slowly planting a warm kiss on my lips. I shivered this being the first compassionate kiss since.. well.. never? He walked away without saying another word leaving me out in the wet night air. I giggled like a little girl twirling around on the sidewalk until something cold stopped me. Cringing I knew exactly what it was.

“Who’s your new boyfriend?” the voice writhed. Sighing I turned around “Jerome-” he cut me off with one finger grabbing my hand and leading me to the alleyway we had parked in. “Let’s talk doll?” Nervously I stopped dead in my track knowing this could end in one of his famous torture cessions. He glared back at me snarling. “I said let’s talk.” he yanked harder on my arm forcing me to follow behind. “ladies first” he said opening the passenger side door ushering me in with a big smile. Nervously I gt in feeling a bit relieved to be off my feet, He got in the drivers side silently fuming as he started p the car. I avoided his gaze instead focusing on the city lights that whizzed by. He headed in the direction of the home we were currently staying in., hopefully if all things went right we would hash out of anger in the bedroom between the satin sheets like we always had but I had a feeling this wasn’t going to be one of those times. We had just reached the gravel driveway when Jerome slammed on the breaks. He looked at me smiling sickly “I apologize I haven’t had my drivers license since.. well.. never!” he shrugged happily for a moment until his grin faded. He started the breathe heavily staring uncomfortably into my eyes.

I tried to look away wanting to focus my attention on the night sky but his gaze held me still. We stayed put for a few seconds until in some fit of rage he pulled out a pistol and stuck it to my forehead. “ya know I should kill ya’ doll embarrassing me in front t of all those people?” he snaked towards me a mulishness grin overtaking his face, he was hurt though something in the deep part of his eyes told me so. I wanted to scream at him expressing how horrible he had been to me but that would only make him want to blast me even more so I took his cruelties. He stared st me not blinking until I nodded acknowledging him. Slowly he took the gun down looking out the front window chuckling to himself.

I wiped a tear off of my cheek sneaking a look at him, his eyes were widened with the night sky, his fists pulsating on the steering wheel. Suddenly he began to laugh harder thrashing his fists and head off of the wheel yelling nonsense at no one in particular. He grabbed my hair pulling me closer to his face. Seething in my ear. “Why did you do this to me?” His hand shook as he held onto my hair. “I-I’m sorry I-” I shook my head slightly trying to loosen his grip but it was no use. “You will be sorry Kitten- I you were stronger than this” I opened myself up a little hoping to deescalate the situation. “You’re cruel to me Jerome. You treat me like one of your thugs that you can just throw around all you want. I’m not though and you know it.” He let go of my hair looking coldly into my eyes. “Since when have you become so entitled?” He asked ending with a horrible laugh. I rolled my eyes getting out of the SUV before getting out all the way though I chucked the blasted heels he had previously thrown at me. They hit him and he gasped, I didn’t see his reaction due to the door slamming him out of my view.

I started walking the sound of the cold gravel crunched under my feet. I focused on the sound instead of the possibility of Jerome starting up the car and running me over. “Y/n wait!” I heard him yell beginning to jog after me. I started in a full run hoping to get far far away from him. His pace quickened behind me I was always a slow runner and plus he had shoes on so it wouldn’t be long until he caught up to me. Again I tried to focus on the night sky as I ran but it was no use the feeling of his hand latching onto my arm. “gotcha” he said His fingernails dug into my skin, I winced at the pain kicking him as hard as I could in the shin. He growled loosing his balance and falling to the floor. I took off in a full sprint distracted when I heard him cock his gun behind me. I ducked hearing it fire three times. I stayed flat on the ground feeling the dust form the rocks get into my eyes. I blinked rapidly trying to rid myself of this pain. Jerome walked up to me sticking out his left hand, his gun still in the right. I grabbed it and he helped me up. “What is the matter with you?!” I said mad.

He shrugged looking into my face. “You think?-” He shook his head looking for the right thing to say. “Look I haven’t been the nicest guy- I know- but seeing you kiss” He growled violently kicking rocks, “I dont want to talk about it! the point is- I’m sorry! Just stop doing this and be my doll again.” I was shocked at his words he looked defeated his face morphed in sadness. I nodded grabbing his hand.. “Why did you kiss him?” he said suddenly walking back to the car. I shrugged “I don’t know” he scoffed “I don’t know?, I don’t know!” His hand wrapped around my throat. “How do you not know. You act like it’s nothing but you don’t have to live with it. You don’t have to live with that-” he busted out laughing striking the car with his fists until his knuckles bled. Pan icing at the smudged blood on the car window I ran up behind him and hugged his waist as hard as I could hoping to calm him down. He stopped breathing heavily. “Oh doll you kill me” he said hopelessly.

I unraveled my arms and grabbed his hand skipping the car ride home walking him the ten feet to the house. I opened the front door letting us both in. “Who was he? huh? Some stud? Business broker with his life in gold?” Hr groaned leaning up against the kitchen table that sat to the right of the door. I shrugged again saying ‘I don’t know’ he winced at my words flipping the table over. “Stop saying that! You’re my whole world and this is how you-” he laughed. I dropped my head all to be lifted up when he was quickly in front of me. “I need to speak with you in the bedroom.” He growled walking away. I grew excited watching his broad shoulders imagining them without the white button up shirt he was wearing. I smiled skipping behind him entering the bedroom just as he was sitting on the desk in front of his bed a devilish look on his face. He snake up to me whispering in my ear. “I’m going to make you forget all about him. I’m the only stud in your life. You got that Doll?” I nodded my hear pulsing in my head.

His hands made their way up under my shirt, his skin cold on my body heat. I closed my eyes letting myself enjoy the sensation until my shirt was completely off. His lips kissed my neck smoothly while he continued to grip the rest. I sighed wishing he was always like this. His lips moved up to my ear, nibbling slightly on my earlobe. He began to whisper. “Don’t even hurt me again.” I opened my eyes sadness coming over my whole body until I saw him smirking as he left the room. “Jerome!” I yelled. IT took awhile for him to answer. “Sorry kitten things to do, places to be, doll snatchers to kill. But don’t worry” Jerome poked his head into the room smiling “I will be back when he’s dead” I shivered in excitement as his foot steps traveled down the hall again and out the front door.

Thank you for reading all more to come Same Bat-Time, Same Bat-Channel!

#joker x reader #joker #jerome valeska x reader #jerome valeska #gotham #joker fanfiction #joker fan #joker fandom #jerome imagine #joker imagine

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survivor-switzerland · 7 years

Text

EPISODE 9: MY LITTLE GREMLINS AND I ARE FLIPPING THE SCRIPT - DOM

Logan went home and I AM SHOOK. I AM SHOOK TO THE CORE!! I thought he could've used his connections with Luke to save himself but looks like the 4 OG Matterhorn are tight as a rope. Right now Tyler could be in danger because I feel like this challenge is in Max's wheelhouse.

Now my tribe is in a dilemma because we all like each other and we have to vote each other out. Thank the sadistic hosts for that. Now hopefully I win this immunity because I need to be absolutely sure I'm going to merge because ain't no way am I gonna be a pre-merge boot!

Well, the plan worked out and Logan left. It sucks and kinda felt like how I'd imagine kicking a puppy would feel like but I think it's for the best that he's gone, although it does suck that he went through all of this to get the same placement a second time.

From here on out, the only person I put my trust is 100% is Zack, then Tyler and then Luke, which is kind of surprising. But Luke seemed kinda sketchy this round with his connection with Logan so I'll be keeping my eye on him.

I'm nervous about this round since both tribes are going to tribal, but hopefully I'll be good no matter what as Matterhorn still has the advantage on the tribe, and Tyler and Max are the minority. The ideal situation is that someone other than Max wins immunity and then we can take them out because I think it's about time that we end the feud between Zack and Max, and that isn't gonna be done by taking out Zack, at least not on my watch!

UGHHH I am so upset. So Logan was voted out and that is a huge blow for not only my game but for Nick and Ashley Sarah's games as well. Now that he's gone, we have to get a majority some other way. The only way we can do that is if we make sure that Ian is on our side so we can blindside Luke, Tyler, Zack, and Abel. My tribe has to stick together and I'm assuming that Max will be voted out of that tribe bc of the friend group. That is kinda good for me though. HOLY CRAP I JSUT CAME UP WITH SOMETHIGN WHILE TYPING THIS. WHAT IF WE BLINDSIDE BEN? COULD YOU IMAGINE THE CHAOS? THIS WOULD BREAK THE ABEL/BEN FRIENDSHIP F2 AND WOULD GIVE US NUMBERS IN CASE BEN FLIPPED ON US AT THE MERGE. y'all this is my story arch or my elimination episode. i'm hoping it's not the latter of the two. anyways. I came into this game wanting to work with Luke. After tonight? I love you luke but you can fucking choke for what you did to logan. logan deserves so much better and now I'm coming for you. I will not stop until you and your alliance is taken out by none other than THE dom from original Monte Rosa. You can kiss my Puerto Rican ass luke. love you as a person tho you're actually super sweet but you pissed me off. anyways good night america and stay shook canada.

Voting Logan out last tribal was so tough because he's one of my best friends and it sucks so bad but like I said in my voting confessional, it was going to happen at some point. Coming into the double tribal, we really need to do our best to make sure that Max doesn't win individual immunity because he's next on the list to go. If he does win immunity? I have no idea what might happen. I called with Tyler and we talked it through and said that we could probably vote for Abel or Zack but to prevent a tie, I might have to use my vote negator to ensure that rocks aren't pulled and one of us goes home. Tyler and I made a pact to go to the end and we plan on doing that but it's gonna be tough. Looking at a potential merge after these two tribal councils, I predict that the two people that leave in the double will because jury members 1 and 2 but I'm not sure. Merge is going to be difficult with there only being 4 original Matterhorn members (3 if Max wins immunity) so Tyler said he'd protect me as best he can but Tyler doesn't know that I'm actually close with some people over there so I should be okay.

Double tribal and someone will be immune from each tribe!!!! I'm so nervous!!! It would be nice to actually win something for a change. These challenges seem to be either not my greatest or I just don't have time like people here seem to.

EPISODE 9

We were all ready for a merge and to be up 8-4, but SURPRISE! It was a double muthafuckin' tribal. Yikes. The good news was that if I were to survive the double-elimination, I would make it to the top 10 and officially surpass my Tumblr Survivor: Myanmar placement.

Logan was bounced from the other tribe and that came as a MAJOR shock because Tyler and Max were (seemingly) brand new to the OG Matterhorn 4 and furthermore, they had a history of working with Logan on the Trent, Daisy, and Lily votes as far as I knew. And Max is lacking in the possessing a personality department, so I really thought they'd all just be bored do death by them and vote them off. Fortunately, Tyler stuck around and I hope that Tyler manages to survive this double tribal as well.

I discussed Logan's elimination with Nick. Tyler warned me how close the two of them (and Dom as well), so I figured I could get some loyalty points from Nick by eulogizing Logan and bemoaning his tragic loss and how detrimental it is to my game and blah blah blah--we had a good talk, Nick's a really cool dude, and I'm going to need him on my side going forward.

This double tribal does not bode well for me. I'm safe. No one is coming after me. But that's because I'm aligned with everyone (without even trying). It's 100% Parvati's "I'm in such a hot pickle!" situation. Ashley and Ian think that I'm with them (and I am). Dom, Nick, and Benjamin think I'm with them (I'm really with just Dom as far as I'm concerned, but that could change). My ultimate goal is to find a way to get rid of either Benjamin or perhaps Ian this round, preferably the former so as not to sketch out Tyler if he survives this round.

I chatted up Dom first and he took the words right out of my mouth--Ian is sketchy, but Benjamin is a major flight risk going forward. Ben resolved to talk to Nick. I offered to talk to Ashley and she could potentially talk to Ian. We both want the same thing. We both want this vote to be unanimous so that there are no apparent cracks going into a merge at 10 with 4 OG Matterhorns still kicking. That's dangerous territory. When one is in the majority, they need that family as happy and carefree as possible. A 4-2 or 3-3 could ruin lives here. No, thank you. Upon talking with Ashley and Ian, they agreed.

The immunity challenge was finding cows. Really, this was going to come down to who had the most free time available to them and who was the most willing to give up that free time. The answer in this case was Ian (but the real story is--Jesus Christ, Zack! Several thousand cows! I feel like you were safe no matter what and you just put that time in to show...how big of a threat you are? I found that strange) and Ian's safety is a best case scenario for me. The two names swirling around the tribe were Ben for potential connections to the other side and Ian for being a wet blanket in terms of strategy.

Let me take this opportunity while discussing Ian to say that he's been a MAJOR disappointment. Early in the game, he was really sweet and genuine and I loved the guy, but the second we had our first tribal council looming, he became this enigma. He suddenly has no opinions. Talking strategy to him has been very difficult because he brings nothing to the table. Part of me figures that this is because Ian doesn't want any information to come back around and bite him in the ass, but I feel like he's going about it wrong. He's coming across to several people on our tribe as very noncommittal and shifty. When I ask him how he feels about the vote or what he thinks our best move is, he talks in riddles and blah statements and not only is it boring, it's not helpful at all. It's like I'm talking to a dog. I feel like I'm addressing him with clarity and all he hears "Blah Blah Blah, Ginger." Honestly, if Ian hadn't won immunity, I'd have been very tempted to get rid of him this round.

Ian's immunity put Dom and I in a clear driver's seat with Ben's elimination in our sights. We were fine. Ashley was fine. Ian was Ian (but will go along with Ashley and me). Ben thinks everything's hunky dory and Ashley is our only option and such--cool, cool, cool. Then there was Nick. And Dom was telling me Nick is on board because I'm on board, but Nick seemed VERY apprehensive when I spoke to him. Nick clearly wants to vote off Ashley, but is having difficulty with pulling the trigger because he knows voting off Benjamin is best for his game. The whole exchange between Nick and I was so weird because he and Dom were both telling me different things about Nick's perspective at the same time. It was terrifyingly unsettling.

And then I fuck up. Dom & Ben are similar names to me insofar as they're one syllable and three letters and in conversations with both Nick and Dom, I said "Yeah we're all set to vote for Dom" or something like that when I definitely meant "Ben." Oh my God! Such a terrible lapse in language. This is why one shouldn't drink and scheme. The names all start to get loose. Fortunately, I think Nick and Dom believed me (it's the truth, I swear), but holy shit if I were to get voted off just because I did the whole "I Ross take thee Rachel--Emily!" thing. I'm the worst.

New future plan--find some way to eliminate both Ian and Nick while keeping the sane ones, Ashley and Dom happy. Let's make that happen, okay?

So Zack wins individual immunity... *inserts Katya rolling her eyes losing to Alaska in a lip sync for the second time.gif*

Wow! I won immunity so I'm guaranteed F10 wohoo! Honestly if I stayed home yesterday instead of going to the mall I may have even reached the 2k mark alongside Zack. But nah I wasn't gonna waste my last few days of summer vacation finding some damn cow. As Bart Simpson said "Don't have a cow man."

Damn Tyler came in second now I'm so worried for him. This double tribal council guarantees 2 OG Monte Rosa going because over here on Matterhorn we're all OG Monte Rosa and on Monte Rosa the 4 OG Matterhorn will obviously stick together.

Now hosts, you know I love all you and all but for this round I hate you all because we all like each other on our tribe and we have to vote someone out. :( Ugh, can we just all eat some nightlock berries and rebel against these evil hosts.

So far according to Nick, Ben and Ashley's name has been thrown and I'm not gonna let Ashley go, not on my watch! The H4rmony alliance must survive this tribal and my tribe needs to have a united vote so no one is alienated and flips on us.

hiiii!!!! long time no talk!! idek where to begin tbh. so i had like 2 tribals off bc my tribe won immunity?? i was shook bc that was a new feeling in this game to like.. have off and just relax and not worry! but last night, we had a tribal! and logan? went home. that's exactly what i wanted. lemme explain.

i told logan i want max out. (i mean.. i do but i'm not dumb enough to let logan get further then he has already.) so i told logan i'd vote with him, which i did. but i made sure i still had the votes to get logan out. i can't have logan, nick & dom make merge together. i jusy can't, they would be untouchable. but i want logan to think i had nothing to do with his blindside because come merge, i don't want nick & dom coming after me for plotting logan's demise. and it worked. logan believes that i had nothing to do woth his blindside and that it was all luke. so sorry luke, but dom & nick can come after you while i sit back and enjoy my motherfuckin sprite.

SO! this week both tribes are going to tribal. i won immunity so i'm good. (btw my score... i really fucking found over 2,000 cows...) but i want and need max gone now. son of a bitch voted against me last tribal and it openly plotting against me and i don't need someone like that in the merge. so, if i get what i want like usual, max will go. todaloo hoe!

Okay so I hope this vote goes smoothly. Ben thinks that the vote is for Ashley tonight. Little does he know, my little gremlins and I are flipping the script. or so i thought until brett fucked up by saying my name instead of ben's. im still kinda confused as to why that happened but oh well. i love ben so much but like he's going to win the game if no one takes him out lmao. voting ben out is going to screw us all over when we merge though. the other tribe's friend group is like so close with ben (unless abel is voted out tonight idk i could be reading the other tribe completely wrong) I'm hoping that either Luke, Zack, Jev, or Abel go home tonight because we need numbers going into the merge. Ben is too scary to keep around because of the fact that he'd flip to Abel's side. We need to get Abel out as soon as possible because he literally has a winner's edit. He's gone to 7 tribals and has gotten votes at most of them. He needs to go as soon as possible so someone else has a shot at winning.

Lmao Zack found like 2000 cows fucking loser

I'm so nervous, we've all put votes on Max but now I'm scared in case he pulls out an idol and he's the sole vote for me and I leave. He can't vote Zack, so I'm probably next best.

I either beat my previous placement tonight or I do worse than I did last time around, so there's a lot at stake for me personally.

#ihopeiseeyounever #confessionals

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