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raayllum · 9 months

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Anyway I wanna talk about hands in Finnegrin’s Wake

This is not my last or even my deepest meta dive on the episode by any means but I’m a bitch who appreciates consistent symbolism and the Hand Motif is on fire this episode so like, let’s talk about it.

The first thing to establish is the (understandable) importance of hands in Callum’s mage arc, given that you draw runes with your hands and hold magical objects, etc. This is in line with primal magic yes

but also with dark magic, highlighted explicitly in S4.

By being tied to primal / Sky magic, Callum’s hands (and ability to use them to help his friends, do magic, etc) is tied to freedom. This is also linked to chains/bondage with Rayla’s wrist binding and dark magic, metaphorically, for Callum. So it makes sense that 5x08, an episode that is very much about primal and dark magic and subsequent themes of freedom vs control is likewise obsessed with this hand motif.

However, I want to talk about Rayla, and Callum, and how the hand motif, dark magic use, and Callum’s connection to the Ocean arcanum are set up this season. Briefly on the last one (that can be a meta on its own I want to dive into, pun intended, in tandem with adding S4′s development to it) because post for another day, but I think it’s worthwhile to mention.

For starters, there’s Finnegrin having a direct callback to Callum’s line from 5x04 with Rayla (which is also being paralleled to Viren and Claudia’s “I’ll do anything” in 5x03 an episode prior). And with Callum’s hand clasped over his wrist, foreshadowing the ‘anything’ he’ll do will be to literally undo his chains (and to metaphorically take some on) in order to save Rayla by the end of the episode.

But we see Callum repeat this “wrist rubbing” motion a few times this episode (pin in it for later) in addition to the repeated emphasis in S5 with Callum always being the one to reach for / take Rayla’s hand. Although she and Callum are undoubtedly in a much better place than they were in S4 in repairing their relationship, Rayla still initiates almost zero contact with him across the course of S4 and S5 (grabbing his elbow and wiping his drool away when he’s asleep in 4x03; placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder in 4x09; resting her head on his shoulder in 5x02; touching his face in 5x08 to provide comfort).

This is a far cry from how touchy-feely she is with him in Arc 1, initiating much more contact than he does, but in S4 and S5 we see this switch around; almost anytime they’re being physically affectionate, Callum is the one initiating.

However, one thing hasn’t changed, and it’s that Callum is almost always the one, across seasons, to initiate handholds (3x01 and the back half of S3 once they’re a couple being the exceptions). And S4 (4x09) and S5 are no exception.

Okay, great, he holds her hand. So what? Well...

In 5x08, Callum does dark magic again outright and connects to the Ocean arcanum primarily out of love for her. As confirmed by the writers on twitter, Callum had to accept exactly what he says in 5x08 about the ocean - that it’s about unfathomable depths, embracing the unknown (even or especially when it scares you) and accepting that there are things you can’t control. And the lack of answers about Rayla’s whereabouts, “I don’t know how to feel about Rayla either,” and “I have to go after him” “I know” helped pave the way for Callum to reach those conclusions in 5x01 and 5x08 alike: “To love is to simply know this: the tides are true as the ocean is deep.” And that realization included accepting that he’d done dark magic (and would do dark magic) to protect her.

So it’s not surprising, therefore, that while connecting to the Ocean arcanum, Callum looks at his hand, and rubs the same wrist as before, almost like he’s mimicking the crushing motion he would’ve done with the slug.

Or indeed that it’s a gesture Viren does in his dark magic induced dreams, and during Callum’s arcanum speech, either, if inversed.

Callum is accepting that the depths he can’t see, his “I would do anything for you” promises and inclinations, are a (dark) path he can’t entirely see and understand, but something he knows lives inside him, and has for a long time: “But not everything’s changed.”

Darkness equals dark magic equals chains, and Callum has enough self awareness (that Viren did not) to know more so of what he’s walking into, and that’s precisely why it scares him. Why, by the end of 5x08, even as it’s revealed how he got his chains off, it’s clear they’re not gone. Not really. Not to him. Especially considering now he knows exactly where dark magic leads in ways he didn’t before in 2x07: Aaravos. (“As long as we protect each other, as long as we love each other, you can never control us” and now Callum knows that isn’t necessarily true, because he gave up the info to Finnegrin, and he willingly took another step down a dangerous path.)

Which is why I love that Rayla is the one to reach for him, to gently touch his shoulder and then his face and pull him into a hug. And I love the way Callum hesitates to place his hands - powerful, ‘tainted,’ chained - around her like another link in said chain, so different and yet so similar from their hug in 2x04 about a lack of magic, and now having arguably too much. And all of it - the dark magic use, the metaphorical and literal chains, the devotional key of the Ocean arcanum, the hands - synonymous with his love for Rayla.

#tdp callum #tdp #rayllum #tdp meta #the dragon prince #hand motif #callum #multi #s5 #5x08 #could do a whole thing on elmer and how he thematically connects to the possession plot line but again #meta for another day <3 #analysis series #tdp spoilers #s5 spoilers #analysis #yes i Did hurt my own feelings writing this one thank you for asking #the fact i stayed so on topic for this one is Truly Incredible i think #i would do anything for you

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capitalisticveins · 1 year

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Shaw Pack Headcanons Part 4 i think (INVERSION EXCLUSIVE EDITION [Ft. Sam])

I only listened to each Aftershock video once bc they make me cry so if any of these hcs were debunked in those vids PLEASE tell me

Also in another part of these hcs I said that Baaabe and Angel carpooled to the stadium so that’s why all four of them drove back in the same car okay enjoy

- Christian wholeheartedly believed he would die during Inversion.

- Tank was doing security during the Inversion, but they were scheduled to work inside the school, so they heard what was going on via Lasko’s announcement

- When they heard, they ran to the ward while shifted, and headbutted the ward. They kept punching and clawing at the ward while yelling incoherent words. It took Milo and Sweetheart pulling them back and explaining the plan to calm them down. By the end of it, their knuckles were bruised and bleeding, and tears were flowing down their eyes.

- They were more angry with themselves than they were with anyone else. They were the one who volunteered to work inside the school, and they were slacking off. They keep cursing themself out for sleeping under the staircase while their entire pack and Sam were fighting for their lives. They believe they could’ve done something, or protected more people if they were inside.

- David considered disbanding the Shaw Security company, Angel had to convince him otherwise, because he’d regret it in the end.

- Sweetheart thought Milo would die when he used his core to break the ward.

- When Tank and Sam got home, he broke down immediately in their arms. They spent that night on his reclining chair just staying in each other’s embrace.

- Christian and Arden refused to split up. No matter how many times they were told they’d save more people that way, neither budged.

- Sweetheart tried to phase through the ward to see if everyone’s okay, but couldn’t.

-David and Asher tried to text Baaabe and Angel, but the messages couldn’t go through. It wasn’t until an hour after everything happened that Baaabe and Angel got the text, and they nearly cried reading them.

- Baaabe bought the wedding ring 2 days after the Inversion. They never wanted to lose the chance to propose again.

- Sweetheart broke every traffic law possible when Milo called all panicky.

- Angel cried so much when they saw David made it outside the ward that they couldn’t see and drive back home. Baaabe had to drive the car with Asher riding shotgun.

- Tank saw the Closeknit ad before Milo told them about it, and broke their laptop in half midway through the ad.

- Kelsey wasn’t with the pack during Inversion, so when she heard about what happened, she immediately booked a flight and called Christian and Arden non-stop.

- Angel strained their voice and had to drink tea for a week with how much they were yelling.

- Baaabe was crying too, but it was easier for Lasko to comfort them because they were more willing to listen.

- When the ward fell, Baaabe and Angel stuck together and ran into the crowd, asking if anyone saw any wolf shifters around that were a part of security.

- Tank refused to show up to the award ceremony for the Shaw Pack. Half was for hatred of the Department, the other half was them believing they didn’t deserve it.

- Baaabe found Asher’s chest scars endearing about 7 months after Inversion. It reminds them he’s still there.

- Angel was making cupcakes before they got Milo’s call, to celebrate a “successful job for the Shaw Pack”. When Angel and David got home they told him they had to fix something in the kitchen before they’d join him in bed.

- They threw the cupcakes out the window and sprayed Febreeze everywhere.

- Bailey felt horrible that she wasn’t there for them when Inversion happened, -and didn’t go to any pack meetings or Solstices the next year.

- Milo was worried, she went NC with everyone, and he had to find out where she lived to talk about it.

Taglist: @vidiawinter360 @ilovedavidshaw

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st4rg-zer · 8 months

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I associate Sam and Darlin to this song

Sam & Darlin ( Headcanon edition )

- Darlin always sits on the kitchen counter whenever Sam cooks so they can be around him

- When Sam first met Milo, he was confused by his accent ( Sam doesn't handle accents well, hell, he doesn't even like his own accent )

- Darlin drags Sam to carnivals, arcade, Build-A-Bear, and other places like that, because Quinn always denied Darlin when they asked to go to them

- Whenever Sam found Darlin crying after or during the inversion, he'd let Darlin cry on his shoulder or just let them punch him in the gut as hard as they want until they calmed down ( He didn't care about the pain )

- Darlin hates cooking but is a sucker for baking and decorating cakes

- Sam doesn't like spicy or sour foods while Darlin loves spicy and sour foods

- When Asher and Milo met Sam, they were confused by his teeth when he talked to Darlin, but we're also cautious because of what Quinn did.

- Sam finds Darlin sleeping in random places. On the couch? Yep, they've slept there, bedroom floor? Their personal favorite, Washing machine? it hurt their back a bit but they slept

- Sam doesn't understand half the shit Asher and Darlin say when they rant about video games, it's the one thing he can't keep up with

- when Sam met David, he wasn't expecting for David to be shorter than him.

- Darlin's fur when they shift is the softest yet most course fur out of the whole pack

- Darlin is barely shorter than Sam

- Sam's teeth are rather dull compared to other vamps

- Darlin randomly bites Sam's arms and hands

@tank09

#Spotify #redacted fandom #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted darlin #redacted sam #redacted headcanons #redacted tank

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kerubimcrepin · 3 months

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Episode 17 - Toothache

These look like various different armours. Interesting.

One of the very, very rare times Kerubim says "Jojo", and not "Joris" or "my Jojo".

Considering how fast he came, chances are he was outside, listening in to Kerubim searching for the tooth. He is so real for that.

Joris gets a pass for not being normal about Kerubim and his stories because he's 7. I won't make fun of him. He's baby.

(Kerubim doesn't get a pass for not being normal about Joris because he's like 60-80, and should go to therapy, instead of compensating for his fail orphanage childhood and divorce. It's equality. To me.)

Yes, his spine always hurts. Yes, he's also still very good at acrobatics and parkour, as all adventurers should be. He contains multitudes.

Peace and love in the World of Twelve. Also, Kerubim's fruity stance here...

He loves sharing things that make him happy with Joris. It's very cute. But also Joris is like 7, so I don't know what he's expecting.

Maybe he's trying to raise him with a love for selling things to people, so that one day he will continue the family business.

Bad news: Joris's main interest as an adult, while manning the store, is Bullying The Customers. Bullying them until they start to cry or call him slurs.

And are these... "assistants" in the room with us, right now?

Also: Kerubim knits, as can be gauged from the yarn balls with the knitting needles in them. At least he is putting that yarn ball addiction that has been alluded in the first episodes (before Simone cleaned up) and which will be fully revealed in episode 49, The Jellivision, to a good use.

I just know that before coming out, they had a talk that went something like:

"And then, when I clap, my Jojo, you will jump onto the counter, with milk! Imagine how happy it would make the customer."

"Yay papycha!"

Yet again, everyone in this household loves to jump onto tables. This will not change in even 600 years. Manlets. Littlefellas. Shortguys.

Joris is more won-over by Keke's customer tactics than the customer. A likely thing for Joris to be.

I want to point out that, at literally no point during the series, except for the racing episode, do we see Kerubim actually go to Brakmar, or really explore the Sidimote Moors.

I wonder if he has something to hide.

(Atcham. I am yet again talking about Atcham.)

Despite wanting to act like he's cool and lucky, Kerubim does actually put in the time to research what waits him where he's going. Especially when he knows it's going to be dangerous. It's an interesting contrast to the way he was in the Unikron episode.

I suppose it's very likely that that story happened before this one, and he's matured.

(Though it doesn't mean he isn't wrong about things sometimes.)

Truly, he is the male version of Lina Inverse.

Food moment: I am not describing all of them, but man, those sure are fruits and veggies.

This implies that Kerubim has used the tooth for cleaning before, either cleaning the house, or cleaning himself. No wonder he's so beautiful.

I will be real, if I was Kerubim I would like. Do unspeakable evils upon Simone. I would make her tea with salt for a week. He is more patient than all of us.

Dead.

Yeah, not even being the best and the prettiest can save this. It's over.

#ep17 #wakfu #dofus #krosmoz #ro liveblogs dofus

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gavinsdeviant · 1 year

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Things me and my friends have said as Redacted characters

Just a warning that this is all for fun and the jokes that we wanted to share.

Also this mostly consists of me and @davidshawswife so do with that what you will lol

Hope you enjoy x

—

Huxley, visibly sweating: “Please don’t unsubscribe, I swear it gets better.”

Damien: “You should start making ad campaigns for a gym.”

Darlin/Babe, gorging on snacks: “I’m watching true crime so it’ll be fine.”

Angel: “It’s like you want me to cry on the the kitchen floor.”

Guy, completely out of the blue: “We love an accidental piss.”

Darlin, bleeding out on their own couch, talking to Sam: “I’ll boost your ego in my suicide note.”

Gavin: “Hoe life or no life.”

Lovely: “WITH EVERY ATOM IN MY BODY I WANT HIM TO DANCE OVER MY DYING CORPSE.” (For storyline purposes, this is a joke)

David, completely done with life: “Please don’t tell me your a flat earther.”

Angel: “I’m really not but things would have been a lot easier for us depressed folks.”

Sam during Inversion: “As long as nobody was decapitated, we are all fine.”

Guy, after Honey comes home: “The princess was hangry, ladies and worms.”

Gavin, during Halloween in the 2000’s: “This is the skin of a killer, Bella.”

Their therapist: “We were talking about how to get extremely hurt and not lose your ability to walk. How do we think that could happen?

Lovely, contemplating life: “Death.”

Darlin: “Are you upset with me?”

Sam: “No… I just freaked out cause you were like SOS and I was like WTF.”

Huxley: “My mom thinks you’re pretty.”

Damien, blushing: “…”

David, sarcastically: “Have fun. Don’t crash.”

Ash: “Yeah, so I almost did in fact crash.”

Ollie’s listener: “My parents will probably pray for my soul. They already do. I’ve literally heard my dad praying for me and I laughed. He sounded so desperate LMAO.”

Their therapist: “Same.”

David, begrudgingly: “I love you.”

Ash: “I love you too, babygowrl.”

Freelancer, losing their shit: “You sound like a kettle.”

Gavin: “You sound like an imitation of a dolphin.”

Angel, eyes brimming with tears: “My mother just said she loves you.”

David: “Slay.” (with all due respect, this is a joke)

Darlin, talking about Quinn: “Depression and obsession don’t mix well.”

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moon-blanket · 6 months

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Oh my god the next part came Super Fast let's GET IT

They way he told them to sit. Hi ! hey. Okay i'm sitting.

Damn the Bennetts tried to get other Houses to join the endeavor about CloseKnit. Good riddance then.

William didn't "banish" Porter after his scuffle with Vincent, just a convenient way of him doing his job with less suspicion ? Since he techincally wasn't "affiliated" with House Solaire anymore ?

William ordered PORTER to do it all ? Using the Summit as a way to carry out a "Favor" for another House in the Council ? Seizing the assets of the House of Bennett in the outcome ??

Holy fuck, just how powerful is Porter. That whole murder/alibi plan of his is Wild.

Okay William not wanting to wait around for another 1500 lives lost to get eyes pointed on House Bennett and get the ball rolling. That's a slay. I get it.

I'm with Vincent, What's the logic of all of this !! This "Game" is confusing !!

What is William's part in this !! What is he doing right now !!

I don't blame Vincent for "seeing in black and white" in this moment ! His world is actively crashing down around him, everyone he trusts is in on Something but Him and Lovely (maybe Sam, who knows), and it's out of NOWHERE ! If this didn't happen, who knows how long this would have been hidden from him ! He has the right to be upset about it !!

William thinks of Vincent as his actual child, loves him like a son :( enough to not want his hands dirty. Knowing that he shouldn't have turned him, his biggest regret, saying what he did to Vincent was wrong..... I actively had to pause and cry on the floor for a good five minutes.

GREAT Reminder from Porter that William isn't a Saint. He doesn't have to be ! He is still a good man, who does good things !!!!! The ways that these results are obtained is rather questionable, but what comes from it cannot be denied !!

He took Porter in and gave him a new life, showed him unending kindess. That's how you obtain allies !! Bonds that truly matter !!! All the things William feels for those in his House are genuine !!!!!!!! He cares for all of them so deeply !!!!!!!!!

The circumstances of Porter's turning is very interesting. Turned by a Mass Maker, constantly invocated and used for his powers in a way he had no say in. Running and Running until he found William, who cleaned him up and mentored him on his powers. That's very nice :(

I'm glad Porter understands that the experience he had was not universal. I'm glad he has the perspective of Vincent's, and i'm glad Vincent has the perspective of Porter's.

---

Overall, I'm very glad that the Two of them (Three, since Lovely sat in on it) had that talk. It was definitely not the most pleasant or comfortable, given the circumstances, but it was absolutely Needed.

And if anything, it's a step in the right direction for both Porter and Vincent. They learned a little bit more about (and from) each other during this whole Event. They may have wildly vast differences, jarringly so. But there is something inside of both of them that is so strikingly similar to me, even if I can't put a finger on it. I don't expect them to be Best Friends after this, but hopefully they have some level of understanding with each other after this. And maybe become the slightest bit nicer to each other, even if it takes a while.

(I see why William wanted Shaw Pack there, since they were all looking into CloseKnit. He let them see some evidence to get DUMP on the ball, as well as some actual justice for the Inversion. But geez, that could have gone bad !)

----

This was a GREAT audio. Poor Vincent and Lovely. They deserve a LONG fuckin' break after all is said and done. Please let them be happy for ONCE lmfao.

Still love you with my life Porter I'll do anything for you by the way.

#redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted spoilers #moon's thoughts #redacted monarchial summit #it just keeps getting more and more interesting gang I'm going to go NUTS.#it's almost midnight and i'm tired as fuck if this makes No sense i'm so sorry.

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krushkreates · 1 year

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tw: mental health talk, talk of anxiety and depression, and mild allusions to death, skin/cuticle picking, mentions of the inversion, crying, and snakes/serpents

the thing abt asher is that he’s not the most observant person ever. it’s not to say he isnt oblivious, but subtly isn’t his strong suit. over the years though (and the years spent working security rlly do hone ur observational skills), he can proudly say he can notice a lot of small things and is a better people watcher. this obliviousness, however, never impeded on his loved ones.

he’s always noticed the slight way david frowns before trying to politely dismiss someone after they yell at him about the quote for a weekend job. he’s never missed the way milo tugs on his right earlobe when he’s stressed or how christian looks to the left when he’s lying or how arden hides some of her laughter behind her hands bc of some offhanded comment a douchebag made abt her braces in middle school. he’s never not noticed the way his father’s hardened demeanor softens when he asks about his mother, or when the old man looks at the picture of a baby asher and his mama that has always sat on the fireplace mantle in his childhood home. this observant nature naturally extended to you.

he knows you inside out- the way you’re trying to stop picking at your nails, how your knuckles tense when you catch yourself. he’s known that you twitch slightly in your sleep and that means you’re about to subconsciously move yourself closer to him in a self-soothing way (he won’t ever tell you that. he likes having that to himself). and with the natural progression of your relationship, he knows when you’re entering an episode.

the usual lighthearted scolding of leaving clothes on the floor is a tired pick up shirt please and the extra hour spent in bed on the weekend combined with either no bed making or half-assed bed making has him in care mode.

in its purest form, it is asher doing what he believes he was put on this earth. murmuring enthusiasm into your ear of i know your brain is making you tired, but you’ll feel better later if you take a bath now. and he’s bringing you soup in bed (yes it’s canned, yes he got scolded by david again and now there’s a giant container of it in the fridge) and he’s changing the bed sheets around you, like you did for him during his healing after the inversion. he’s crooning sweet, silly songs that his brain somehow knows how to make up. he’s washing your arms, kissing each part after it’s been cleaned and complimenting you you are worthy. you are wonderful. im not going anywhere. and it’s 4am holding you if you need to cry and he somehow manages to make you laugh through it all.

this is what he thinks he’s meant for. caring for the love of his life and fighting their invisible dragons. he’ll gladly slay any serpent that tries to hiss their way through their brain.

#tw: depressive episode #tw: anxiety #tw: skin picking #redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted asher #redacted babe

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smol-fan-creations · 2 years

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Angel Time!! 😉

I'm not posting these in order of favorites, it's just who's design gets finished first Lol

Angel and David's dynamic has me rolling every time I listen to his audios! David is an exception when it comes to Tsunderes for me because he truly makes sure to let Angel know how much he loves them! Most just seem to be written to be big jerks with little to no comfort for their love interest, but David has whole audios that are him comforting Angel. With that, my version of Angel has the name Archer and is the playful flirt we all know. Remember, this will have a bit of spice, talks of nightmares, breakdowns, and some spoilers!

How tall is David? The others have talked about how big he is, so I'm stretching ideas by imagining David as a whopping 6'6". I am aware of that size difference but hey, it leaves some room for hilarity.

Archer is an absolute punk, and while she enjoys poking fun at David, she would stop at a moments notice if she noticed he was upset.

Her junk food addiction consists of things like a lot of sugar, frozen pizzas, and pizza rolls. She even has a stash of it in her home office that she hides from David, "Ahhhhh, Davey!!! Hey babe, watcha need?!"

He actually knows about it but decides to keep quiet and watch how much she eats.

I imagine Archer mainly works from home but goes into the office for big meetings and group projects. She also goes on trips when there are things like conventions and conferences.

The first time David shifted, Archer was just giving him a bit of a hard time but felt bad for pressuring him. Afterward, though, she made a mental note to try to give him ear scratches later on.

I do want to address the video where David confronted the Listener thinking they were cheating.

Archer thought David wouldn't care about the cat situation, and she felt a mixture of guilt and anger at his response. Not gonna lie, she had to stop herself from crying because of how angry David was with her. She knew he had a right to be, but it didn't warrant the level of his outburst.

Afterwards, she probably would play Minecraft for a bit before sitting him down to talk the whole thing over again in a more calm state of mind. She is not going to just let it go without talking it out when they're both calmed down.

Archer during Inversion? The moment she arrived and heard about the situation, she asked all kinds of questions as to what was happening. When she figured out the department was waiting, anger boiled in her like a geyser.

Seeing David caused a dam to burst as she tackled him sobbing and kissing him. The aftershocks made her quiet and really careful about handling David's mental state.

The only time she slipped was when she saw the Department's video where they name-dropped David. A part of her wanted to uh... "speak with the commissioner directly." "I swear to Christ, I might commit a crime if they dare to mention your name again."

I can imagine David had some nightmares and tried to hide them from Archer, but she wouldn't have any of it. She also had similar issues, but of course not as severe as David’s.

When she is stressed, it can cause her to shut down emotionally and mentally. She becomes quiet and will drown herself in something she likes as a way to distract herself. At first, she tries her best to hide it from David, but once he figures it out, she begrudgingly allows him to comfort her.

I had an idea where David once gave Archer a stuffed Avocado as a present, and it is one of the most precious things she has now. She keeps it in her office to cuddle anytime she misses him.

I also imagine there has been a time when Archer has teased David so much at a pack meeting where he has just told her, "Run." She tried to hide with Asher, Milo, and their mates but failed.

SPICY TIIIIIIIME!!!

There are times where David will randomly pick Archer up, and she will become a flustered mess while also really being riled up.

This can be used against her though, as sometimes he will come just close enough to touch her but will walk away just as quick with a smug grin on his face.

That kind of teasing will get the whiniest reactions out of her, and she will try to latch onto him like a parasite. If he does ask her to stop, she'll do it in a heartbeat, but will give him looks and make noises that make her mood apparent.

Archer has made some jokes about David letting her uh... Be on top... And at some point, I can imagine him going, "I don't think you could handle that responsibility..." (I am fully aware David would never actually do this Lol)

Little Personal Thing: Archer really isn't into the whole... predator thing. So, in her storyline, that situation never happens.

#redacted asmr #redacted listener #redacted david #redacted davey/angel #redacted angel #tsundere boy #fight me #big boi

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diviinaee · 1 year

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☆Gavin/Freelancer☆

Adiuva me.

tw: depictions of bpd/ptsd (you can chose but this is kinda personal so it's both), alcohol use abuse/mention, unhealthy coping mechanisms, mentions of hospitalizations and past traumatic experiences in a/n and fanfic, specific depictions of mood swings, self harm, bodily injury, depictions of needles/ivs, recovery, physical hurt/comfort, does result in happy ending tho

a/n : slay uhh, I've had alot of things happened to me as of late (in author fashion), so I've been writing this to give myself a situation I could imagine for comfort. I had respiratory failure which led to alot of mental issues and was put into the Pediatric ICU which was... traumatic. I was sedated half the time and was also under heavy tranquilizers to avoid the doctors having to deal with my mood, which is not something I like hearing because I already deal with feeling like a burden. My parents left me alone half the time which ultimately led to me hallucinating and other stuff. I was alone figuratively and literally. I'm pretty open about this because I want to be what i didnt have. I want to be able to show people that they aren't alone. This world has almost 8 billion people and you are never alone. <3

It's too quiet.

At least to Gavin.

Ever since the Inversion, Gavin had not trusted Freelancer to be by themselves for long periods of times. He knew of their self destructive tendencies that would appear in the silence.

Whenever Gavin had to leave nowadays, he would inform the friend group. Most days, Lasko would bring his entire office into Freelancer's apartment in order to distract them with random knick knacks and piles of unnecessary paperwork that was easy to fill out. Other days, Damien and Huxley would make sure they were still alive. Damien would find himself in charge of medications, food, and overall the physical well-being of Freelancer, while Huxley focused more on how he could distract their emotional well-being. He would bring all the games he owned and would talk for hours about nothing specific.

Gavin appreciated the boys and their attempts at cheering up his Deviant, but in the end, he grew used to the fact that Freelancer's knots were there to stay.

No matter how much happiness, pride, and good feelings would arrive, Freelancer would always have to carry that heavy bag of trauma, sadness, and guilt. No matter how much Gavin fixed up the apartment, or how much he could fixup pretty words to form beautiful speeches, Freelancer would always hear the whispers of the past.

He would feel the knots that appeared at their core, pulling tightly at their heart. He would feel the fleeting whispering of lies from the past, both working together to plot the Freelancer's downfall.

It works, he'll give them that, but he's determined to give them the same light they have him during his times of need.

Which was why when he arrived home to nothing but silence, he attempted to work quickly.

"Freelancer? Are you here?", he asked into the air. He reached out with his aura and began to search. He recited the same traits he loved waking up too.

Determined.

Strong.

Beautiful.

Delicate-

Crying. Freelancer's crying.

He could tell it was them from a mile away. He let his magic surge and guide him to his lover. It wasn't until he drifted on top of bloody broken bottles and empty intact bottles that he realized that he should've stopped outside the bathroom door.

"GET THE FUCK OUT OR I'M FUCKING LEAVING-"

"GET OUT!"

Screaming filled the apartment again and again as Gavin attempted to diffuse the situation. He didn't want to call the department. The last thing Freelancer need was less control of their own life.

He rifted out of the small bathroom and dialled all 3 elementals at once. One by one, he merged them into a big call.

"Freelancer's place. Right now. Bring first aid."

He quickly hung up after that and rifted back into the bathroom, quickly dodging to avoid an empty bottle as it violently crashed against the wall. He looked at the wall and then back at Freelancer as he felt their magic wrap itself around another bottle, ready to throw. He very swiftly made the bottle dissolve to sand in their hands, yet it didn't stop them.

Freelancer continuously wrapped their magic around any object they could find as every part one of them was rifted into the cabnit by Gavin an an attempt to save most of their belongings. In the end, they just screamed in frustration.

Gavin felt so guilty. He should've been more careful with them. He should've seen this sooner. He should've hidden the bottles. He-

"Gavin! What happened?! It's almost 10pm if this a joke I swear to-"

The incubus rifted to the front door and hurriedly opened it and pushed the three elementals inside. Lasko held all sorts of bottles that were labeled as antiseptics for first aid, Damien held a box of what he assumed carried gauze and other bandages, and Huxley carried bottles of water and dehydration serums.

After Gavin was sure that they were all inside he pulled them towards the living room than left to go check on Freelancer.

They were a mess. There they laid, among broken glass and the cold tile, shivering. Tears stained their cheeks as they stared hard into the empty wall. Gavin slowly approached them, his head outstretched in front of them, and sat down carefully next to them.

"Honey... are you okay?", he asked quietly. He knew Freelancer would be overstimulated which made him lower his voice in an attempt not to add on to their stress. They responded to a quiet huff and ultimately brought their eyes up to look at him.

In that moment, his Freelancer couldn't have looked more vulnerable. Their eyes rimmed with tears, every knot in their core blurring over the other, their swollen eyes. Everything about them at that moment screamed at him, begged him, to help. In a sudden moment, they broke. Just like the glass they laid upon, their cover broke. They began silently sobbing as they attempted to look away from him, obviously trying to hide themselves in shame. Gavin did not like one minute of it.

"Hey, hey no, its ok. You're safe. You're okay, just let it out," he whispered quietly. With a nod of permission from the Freelancer, he slowly brought them closer to his chest. Gavin didn't care that the glass that was dug into their side was also digging into his. He didn't care about any of it. All he could do was hold them close and whisper comfort.

Eventually you have to move.

In the span of only 5 minutes, Freelancer had passed out from what he could only tell was exhaustion. He stared at their broken form.

Shards in shoulder. Arm. Their wrist is bad. Are those their ribs? Oh gods. Okay no white. Just lots of-

Gavin shook his head. He couldn't let himself spiral here in the bathroom. He needed to take them out of here so the boys could help heal their external injuries.

Freelancer weighed nothing to him. As a demon, he would pick up a building and not be fazed. So it was no surprise to any of the three elementals when he effortlessly entered the living area holding them bridal style and settled them on the couch.

Lasko's eyes widened, "O-oh god, t-t-that's-"

Damien on the other hand, quickly got to work. He rummaged through his box and was quickly able to find a needle needed for an IV. He opened an orange tourniquet and quickly, but carefully, wrapped it around their arm in order to find a good vein to use. After a minute of searching, he got one. "Huxley give me one the IV bags."

"On it."

Gavin watched as Damien hurried tried to hook up the serum to Freelancer. He and Lasko had been taking turns healing some of the deeper cuts to the best of their abilities. Now all they could do was wait.

After the IV was stabilized and some of Freelancer's more complicated wounds were taken care of and properly bandaged, the group final was able to sit on the floor in relief. Damien leaned against Huxley as the latter leaned his head onto the table, whereas Gavin and Lasko were each leaning into their hands.

"What in hell happened-"

"Dames-"

A soft breath came from Freelancer which made the group stopped and cautiously looked over at them. After that, neither of them wanted to speak. At some point, Gavin didn't know how much time had gone by and softly said, "I came home to them screaming surrounded by bottles. I don't know what happened."

Damien, Huxley, and Lasko all stared at him as they listened. They didn't know what to say. They all knew Freelancer could get this bad, but every single experience caught them by surprise. This wasn't something you could prepare for. It was like an unexpected war call. The floods gates would open and you'd have to hang on to the nearest thing, all while hoping it's stable.

Gavin looked over to his Deviant. They looked so peaceful sleeping there on their couch. If he could ignore the context of his they got there, it would've been cute. But it wasn't.

Damien spoke up, "It's fine Gavin. It's not your fault for not knowing. What matters now is that they're safe and well." He probably heard Gavins mind screaming at itself, it's words twisting with guilt. Damien could always tell.

"Yeah dude. Sometimes we don't know what's gonna happen, but that's okay! We had solutions and we all worked together to help", Huxley said tiredly. It was late. Almost midnight.

Lasko quietly rambled, "Y-yeah, it's not your fault Gavin. D-d-d-don't beat yourself up ab-bout it."

Gavin softly huffed, "You're all right. It doesn't help to sulk in guilt. What matters now is how we can help moving foward."

After long discussions, they found solutions. Someone will be with Freelancer for a handful of days. That way, someone will always be available in case or an emergency.

Although Freelancer was unconscious, Gavin hoped they could feel this. The soft feeling of sincerity. He hoped they could feel the love each one them had for the amazingly, loving Freelancer they had all met.

He hoped that the stars would write them happy lifes, and happy endings. In the end, he hoped the River's current wouldn't dare take his Freelancer away.

a/n : lol i made myself fucking cry. umm, I'm not really this emotional when doing angst. usually its really easy and quick but I wanted this to be genuine. I know that frustration of seeing a fanfic or book and the problem being resolved with a simple kiss or some cheesy shit. I know all of that. The anger, the disappointment. I hope I was able to depict a situation that not only I but others can relate to and find comfort in.

If you suffer with anything, be it big or small, reach out to someone. It doesn't matter whether people say it matters or not. You have a voice and you deserve to be heard. My dms are always open for anyone.

Hope you enjoy. <333

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redactedverse #redacted freelancer #redacted gavin #redacted damn #divine fanfics !

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themonotonysyndrome · 2 years

Text

REDACTED verse - The worst kind of poison

This entire week made me petty and angry. So this is a rushed fic.

(Also, while my Freelancer has a name, they will still be gender-neutral.)

Summary: "Vega would be proud." A small part of the Freelancer whispered as their mother did nothing but cry while her fiancé swallowed a lump in his throat.

A lot of things can ruin a perfectly good day; the Freelancer is no stranger to that after everything that happened in their life.

So when an unknown number has been blowing up their phone the whole day, they know better than to answer it. Unfortunately, they were careless enough not to switch their phone to silent before Gavin swiped it from the dining table.

"Uh, Deviant? I'm pretty sure someone's trying to get a hold of you." The Incubus unnecessary commented as he passed the device to them. He noticed the first call before he Rifted to Aria in the morning, and his curiosity was piqued when the same unknown number continued to call when he returned.

The Freelancer greets him with a lingering welcome home kiss, to which Gavin purrs in delight. He wastes no time in making himself comfortable on the couch before pulling his lover onto his lap so he can cuddle them. The phone and gaming controller are tossed aside. "How's Caelum?" They ask. The moment Gavin arrived home, they withdrew from any online matches on Destiny 2. Everyone agreed to a ten-minute break anyway, especially when they all heard one of their team member's partner screaming for him in the background.

Something about a burning microwave. The Freelancer makes a mental note to ask him about it.

"Caelum's fine. Delphinus and a few Inchoates are watching over the little Empathy Daemons. The Inversion took a toll on them, so the Chorus are prioritising their well-being for the time being." Here, Gavin pauses. He throws an apologetic smile at the Freelancer. "It's probably going to be some time before Caelum could come visit again."

That's completely understandable. The Freelancer's heart goes out to his and his siblings' speedy recovery. "As long as he's getting better, I can wait. Actually, I'm thinking of surprising him with a bake-off when he comes over. Damien has been baking cupcakes lately, and they're delish. Oh! Once I get Huxley and Lasko onboard, we can pair up into three teams. You can be with Damien."

Gavin snorts. "You want to throw Damien off his game before the competition even begins. Naughty, naughty, Deviant."

"Don't pretend you don't enjoy riling him up," The Freelancer grins shamelessly. When Gavin returns it with a smirk, they know they got this in the bag. "Not gonna lie, Damien looks pretty hot when he's mad. And yes, that's a pun. Shut up, you love it. Anyway, we should keep the bake-off in mind during our next grocery run -"

Their phone suddenly rings, interrupting the Freelancer's ramble. It's the same unknown number. The two said nothing as they stared at the phone.

"I think you should answer that." Gavin said finally.

Freelancer hums in agreement and taps on the screen. A familiar voice blurts out before they can open their mouth: "Ain? Ain, is that you? Oh God, baby... It's -"

They immediately hang up. "Wrong number." The Freelancer tonelessly announces and picks the controller back up. They ignore their pounding heart and Gavin's concerned reflection on the glass cupboard beside the TV.

"Deviant, baby, talk to me. You're upset," Gavin begins rubbing their arms in a soothing rhythm. The sudden turmoil from his Deviant's serene emotion is a whiplash. "Do you know the caller? Did they say something to you?"

"Nah, it was just a wrong number." The Freelancer blithely replies, head already back in the game. Their diversion is painfully obvious, and Gavin respects that. He stomps down the burgeoning questions popping in his mind and instead focuses on the gameplay. Making random comments here and there in hopes of distracting his Deviant from the anger that bubbles within them.

It works when the couple eventually moves to the kitchen to prepare dinner.

But Gavin made the mistake of thinking the phone call was nothing more than a fluke.

A new normal has settled in the Empowered world of Dahlia. A sense of fear and suspicion lingers in the air after the Inversion tragedy. The Freelancer couldn't help but notice that their schoolmates, teachers and even civilians are walking around expecting the other shoe to drop. It's tense.

The Freelancer worries for Gavin with this amalgamation of emotions blanketing the city. Their man puts on a wicked grin and assured tone that the atmosphere isn't as bad as during the Inversion, but he promises them that he'll watch himself.

Nonetheless, the Freelancer is ready to help him in any way they can should Gavin buckles under the emotions.

The uncertainty and worry must've shown on their face because Damien clucks his tongue and flip his notebook close. He invited the Freelancer over to his place to go over some notes for their upcoming quiz, but with his friend like this, it's better to address the situation. "This isn't going anywhere. Alright. Let's hear it."

That snaps the Freelancer out of their reverie. Startled, they sheepily apologised, "Shit, sorry, Damien. I know we're supposed to study, but I keep zoning out..."

Damien sigh but pours them a glass of water. The Freelancer gratefully takes it from him. "It's fine. You're starting to worry me anyway. Do you want to talk about it or work it off at the gym with me?"

The Freelancer appreciates Damien's tact. His method of helping always includes problem-solving, and they love him for that. But the thought of going to the gym on a hot Friday like this? Hard pass.

Spilling their guts it is then. "I think I'm starting to worry about everything and anything," The Freelancer complains, rubbing their temple in frustration. "People are still afraid and hurt from the Inversion. Our government hasn't released anything about the reason or people responsible for the portal. Daemons are under pressure from people's negative emotions, and the shitty cherry on top?" The Freelancer shoots a look of disgust at their textbooks. "We have a quiz coming soon. As if everything's back to normal! As if everyone forgot that so many people died in that stadium -"

"Stop it."

Damien's chilling voice made the words abruptly trapped in the Freelancer's throat. They turn away from the Fire Elemental, eyes stinging.

Footsteps went around the table so that Damien could meet with the Freelancer's eyes. "Do you know that Gavin told us he's worried you might take the whole world on your shoulders again?"

The Freelancer stares at him, surprised.

"I'll take that as a no then. Look, Freelancer, you have a big heart, and we love you for that. But you know what we would love more? If you share some of that burden with us. Magic... is amazing, but it never makes anyone invincible. So let's talk."

And talk they did. They talk about their fears and worries from the Inversion until their throats are parched, and both suddenly need to answer some calls.

"Hang on, it's my Mum," Damien said, getting up from the couch with his phone. "Snacks are in the fridge if you want to munch on something. Don't eat too much, though; we're going out for lunch later." He narrowed his eyes at the impishly smiling Freelancer who gave him a salute.

The Freelancer watches Damien step outside the balcony and slides the glass door shut behind him. That's when their phone rings.

They withdraw the phone from their pocket and glance down. An unknown number again. But this time, it's a different one from that woman's. Still, the Freelancer hesitantly presses the button, "Mn-hmm?"

The caller paused at the lack of verbal greeting. A small part of the Freelancer hopes that it's really just a random number now. They're not in the mood to deal with any shitty surprise -

"Excuse me, but is this Ain Nasir? I'm -"

"It's Rose, now." The Freelancer couldn't help but spit out. Their heart begins to race. "Ain Rose. Who are you, and what do you want?"

The caller cleared his throat. His voice wavers a little. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. Please, my name is Robin Montgomery. I'm your mother's... fiancé."

Strike one.

"She's been trying to contact you for a while now, but you must be busy. U-Um. She always talks about you; last night, she told me about your first times at elementary school and showed me a picture of your first year in middle school. She's very proud of you. She misses you."

Strike two. The Freelancer's heart is hammering painfully against their ribcage now.

"I don't know what happened between the two of you. And it's not my place to interfere, but I figured since we'll be a family soon, I want to help you and your mother reconnect again! She loves you very much, Ain. She genuinely regrets whatever it was that made you move out of the house." The caller pleads; sincerity paints his voice. "Will you please answer her calls again?"

Flashes of images and a cacophony of sounds assault the Freelancer's mind. Unwanted memories begin to resurface. Screams, furniture thrown against the walls and despair worn around the neck like a noose.

Freak. Rejected. Unwanted. Abandoned for something out of their control -

Strike three. The final nail in the coffin.

"Sure." The Freelancer replied, calm despite the blood rushing to their ears. Hatred and malice begin to stir in the pit of their stomach.

"R-Really?" Stammers their mother's fiancé, taken aback. He immediately lit up, happy that the Freelancer is finally giving in. "That's wonderful! Farah is going to be so happy! Hey listen, if this isn't too forward of me, can I keep calling you? Farah said you're a great kid, and she's right. I was wondering if the three of us could meet up one day. You know, so we can get to know one another properly before the wedding. O-Only if you're alright with it, of course!"

The Freelancer answered that they'd think about it. The man thanked them profusely and ended the call.

Just then, the balcony's glass door slide open once more. "My Mum send her love, Freelancer. She said she wants to have dinner with you and everyone else once her schedule frees up. Do me a solid and tell Gavin not to traumatise her - Freelancer? What's wrong?" Damien halts; the strange expression on his friend's face is enough for him to instinctively hovers his thumb on Gavin's phone number.

Like a whiplash, it vanishes, and the Freelancer beams at him. "How's your Mum? Is she doing OK?"

"...Busy, but that's practically a norm for her. Are you alright? You looked off just now."

"Just hungry. Can we get lunch now? I'm feeling noodle-y."

"That's not a word, and you know it." The Freelancer attacks him with their best puppy dog eyes until Damien gives in. "Fine, noodles it is. Let me grab my wallet real quick, and we can go."

The Freelancer cheers and hurries to wait at the front door while Damien gets ready. As they made their way to the local Chinese restaurant, Damien briefly brought the Freelancer back to their prior conversation. "The offer is still on the table, Freelancer," The bell above the restaurant's door tinkles when Damien pushes it open so that the Freelancer can enter first. The place is lively, but the Fire Elemental's attention rests solely on the Freelancer. "We can help you carry some of that burdens on your shoulders. That's what friends are for."

The two were seated, and after they handed the menus to the waiter, the Freelancer nodded. "You're right, Damien. I can't fret over things out of my control. So from now, I'm going to focus on dealing with the things I actually can control."

When they lean forward and push their palm toward him, Damien high-fives them with a roll of his eyes.

The two enjoyed their lunch, and the conversations were lighter and more fun. The Freelancer mentioned the bake-off, and Damien readily agreed to join. It would be an exciting change of pace, according to him.

The Inversion might leave a scar on the Empowered residents of Dahlia, but Damien is happy that his loved ones are slowly making healthy progress toward a brighter tomorrow.

Damien's only mistake was not realising the meaning behind his friend's words.

Over various calls throughout the month, Robin Montgomery proved to be an earnest man who could use some tact when talking about the Nasir family.

The Freelancer has yet to meet the man, but he has a boyish charm and laughs whenever he updates the latest news about his lover. Very thoughtful of him. Very stupid of him.

"There's this fantastic seafood restaurant in town that I think you'll love, Ain. Farah said that you're big on seafood, so I thought maybe we could all have dinner -"

The last time the Freelancer had seafood was when they were fourteen, and the allergic reaction didn't outweigh the joy of eating lobsters for the first time. But they simply hum and let the man ramble on, enjoying the vile that simmers in the pit of their stomach.

Throughout their various conversations, the man never once asked why the Freelancer changed their surnames, which was enough for them to disregard any lingering guilt they might have. If it weren't, the lack of questions about the Freelancer's life, interest and basically everything else would've sealed the deal.

Because with Robin, it's always -

"Farah's doing alright. She recently had a physical checkup, and we're waiting for the result. She hopes that your health is well."

"We're thinking of a Spring wedding next year. Your mother mentioned that she wants the venue to be surrounded by flowers."

"Farah said she tried to call you last night but, um, you didn't pick up. I told her that you might be busy with... whatever it is you're doing. Um. Can you maybe give her a call? Whenever is alright with you!"

Anger gives a shot of adrenaline, grievance has a way of making one feel invincible, and the Freelancer nurtures both in spades the moment Robin Montgomery introduced himself.

Gavin has been giving them concerning glances whenever Robin ends the call, and it's getting harder to pretend that everything's alright. Well, everything will be fine, but the Freelancer doesn't want to worry their lover and friends.

This is personal and something long overdue.

Plans were eventually made, and the Freelancer learned that their mother and beau had moved to the neighbouring city just a year ago. With a distance of 2 hours via driving, the couple is excited to visit Dahlia and Farah's estranged child. Meanwhile, Gavin will be visiting Caelum in Aria for a few hours, and the Freelancer's friends are busy with their own agendas for the day.

That leaves the Freelancer a free Sunday to confront their past in a hipster-like cafe, waiting for the inevitable. Anticipation brews underneath their skin, sweeter than their coffee, as they idly drum their finger on the wooden table. They deliberately arrive ahead of the agreed time to compose themselves, but as the minutes tick by, the Freelancer is starting to get ansty.

They check the time on their phone. The moment it hits 1 PM, the Freelancer hears the server greet at the door. "Welcome to the Owlet's Nest. Table for two?"

"No, thank you. Will be joining that table near the window." That's Robin. Sure enough, when the Freelancer glances up, a couple is heading straight to their table. All smiles and no hesitation what's so ever.

The Freelancer didn't stand up, didn't offer any words, and they relished when their mother's smile wavers. Farah looks well beyond her age with prominent crow's feet and slightly gaunt cheeks. She's thinner too, as if the years took a toll on her. "Hey, sweetheart..." The familiar stranger's voice is hesitant. Unsure on how to break the frigid ice.

"Freak! Get the fuck out of my house!"

"Hey, kiddo," Robin greets next, a bit more confident than his lover but cautious enough not to step out of line. "Is it alright if we sit down?"

The Freelancer nods, and the couple makes themselves comfortable. Farah is staring hard at them, like a thirsty man on a desert that stumble upon an oasis. Her eyes practically flooded with emotions; grief, regret, longing, shame and worst of all, love. Anger and hatred simmer within the Freelancer in return. Seeing that no one was saying anything, Robin hurried to pass their order to a lingering waiter. He cleared his throat in hopes of dispelling the awkwardness around the table.

"It's nice to finally meet you, Ain. We're happy to see that you're well and healthy." Robin noted, that boyish charm practically bleeds through his demeanour. He looks a little younger than Farah and nothing at all like her ex-husband.

"Ain, listen to me. I don't know what's going with you, but you need to behave like... like normal again. You're stressing out your mother, alright? I hate it when she-she makes you stay in your room all day."

"What do you want?" The Freelancer finally speaks, causing Farah to flinch and a frown from Robin.

Farah starts tearing bits from the tissue on the table, clearly nervous and eyes skittish, but the Freelancer made sure theirs are on her. "I-I want to talk to you, honey," She takes a deep breath and continues. "Ever since that night -"

"When you chased me out of my home of sixteen years with some profanity thrown for good measured, yes, I remembered."

Uneasiness threatens everyone on a chokehold. Including the Freelancer. Their heart is boiling, and it's getting harder to wear a stoic mask. Beside Farah, Robin opens his mouth to say something. Probably to defend his lover, but the woman presses on despite it all.

"You have every right to be angry for what I did to you that night, Ain. Your father and I divorced soon after, and I had a lot of time to self-reflect. I realised what I'd done and I... I regret it. I regret what I said. I regret what I did to you. And I wanted to apologise to you for so long now."

"Freak! Monster! I saw what you did in the living room! Come here. I said, come here! Right. I'm locking you in your room until you stop being a danger to your father and me!" A struggle and then a stinging cheek. Hot tears streamed down their face.

The Freelancer tilts their head. "Regret? You don't regret jack shit. No, you reached out to me because your boy toy told you to. You probably slipped up and told him about me, and his bleeding heart persuaded you to mend bridges." Farah flushed red, and Robin gripped the edge of the table. Wanting to say something but were unable to because they hit it right on the mark. So they sneer and continue, "I'm not fucking stupid. If you actually have any consciousness, you would've contacted the police the moment I was gone. But you didn't."

Farah curls into herself while Robin whips his head at her, incredulous. Aww, looks like his lover never did tell him the full story. It's an open wound that the Freelancer didn't hesitate to stab and twist the knife.

"That's right, boy toy. Your gentle and kind woman here is actually an abusive piece of shit. She and her limped dick ex-husband." Seeing the tears trickle down Farah's face as she shamefully stared at her lap enraged the Freelancer. The audacity of this bitch to play the victim after everything she did to them!

They want to slap her. Kick her. Strangle her. Crush her. Run her over. Stab her - for the first time in their life, the Freelancer wants nothing more than to hurt their mother as much as she had hurt them.

"Ain. I... I didn't know," Robin butts in, cautious yet firm. His hand on Farah's shoulder. A silent support, and it infuriates the Freelancer even more. "But please, lower your voice. We're in public. Look, we can discuss this further at the hotel with cooler heads. Your mother has a lot of explaining to do -"

The Freelancer sweeps their arms over the table. Saucers, cups, teaspoons and napkins clatter on the floor. Silence instantly descends in the cafe as everyone turns to watch the spectacle. But the Freelancer is oblivious to it. They stand up to glare hatefully at the couple who dares to reach out to them, expecting everything but long overdue retributions. "Did this bitch tell you how she used to abuse me? How she loves locking me in my bedroom for days without anything to eat!? How I'm her favourite dartboard after her fourth bottle!? Hah!? How I went to school wearing sweaters even during the Summers!?" Their voice gets higher and higher until the Freelancer is practically screaming.

Robin's face is deathly pale while Farah shakes. Someone is secretly filming, and the wait staff are frozen.

So the Freelancer smiles cruelly. A hand on one hip and a thumb playfully point at the sobbing woman as they address Robin. "And this is the woman you wanna marry? Seriously? I guess if you're into verbal, physical and emotional abuse, then who am I to judge! Though, word of advice? I don't recommend having a kid with her. She might just throw your baby down the stairs while you're working in another room. Why? Oh, it was crying - something completely out of its control - and she just had a bad day at work. I'm sure you love her enough to see past it, right?"

Farah keens like a wounded dog while Robin recoils away from the Freelancer as if they had just punched him. At this point, he'd prefer that.

But they weren't done. It's been years of buried hatred and sorrow, after all.

"You said you wanted to apologise, Farah? Get it through your oversized head that I don't want your superficial apologies or your fake regrets! LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU, BITCH!" The Freelancer scream, and Farah obeys with a violent flinch. Her eyes are puffy and red, makeup ruined. Her face is wet, and fear is so very visible. "I will never forgive you! I never want to play house with you or your side piece! Or have anything to do with your family! I fucking hate you! I fucking hate Shahrin! And I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing that I could've changed the outcome!"

From a nearby booth, someone whispers, "Isn't that from TikTok?" Fortunately for him, his girlfriend quickly shushed him before the Freelancer's ire could be directed at them.

"Vega would be proud." A small part of the Freelancer whispered as their mother did nothing but cry while her fiancé swallowed a lump in his throat. Not knowing what to say and how to react.

But the Freelancer is still so, so angry. Unaware of their Magic begging to lash out. To utterly destroyed the withering couple in front of them.

All of a sudden, the cafe's door roughly pushes open. Footsteps rush towards their table, but the Freelancer doesn't give a shit.

"Shit! Freelancer, Freelancer - let's go," It's Lasko. He's frantic. They feel so distant when the Air Elemental gently grabs their hand, trying to tug them. "You're hurt. I know you're hurt. I'm so sorry - I understand, Freelancer. I know what you're feeling, b-but we need to go now, OK? Please. Can we go home now?" Lasko all but begs.

"No!" The Freelancer shouts, and they yank their hand out of his hold. "Not after everything she did to me! Not until I hurt her!"

Lasko's face twisted in anguish. Beside him, Huxley's big, gentle hands rest on the Freelancer's shoulders. Quietly and sadly, he murmurs, "Easy, Freelancer. Easy. It feels good, isn't it? Being angry. It's better than being sad, but Ain, you're hurting right now." Huxley's voice is so very soft, yet his words throw the Freelancer off the loop. They stared at Vega, paralysed and helpless as he threatened them, but this strange look from the Earth Elemental was another beast entirely.

It doused the anger somewhat. They could care less about Farah and Robin; the couple could rot in hell for their audacity, but they never wanted to be why Lasko and Huxley looked so frightened.

Squeezing their eyes shut, the Freelancer felt like they had just fought a pointless battle. "I'm done here."

Huxley and Lasko spring into action at those simple words. The Freelancer let themselves led away by Lasko while Huxley paid for any damages in the cafe before following suit. Whispers and murmurs rippled the moment the trio left, and the wait staff cleaned the mess done by the Freelancer. Eyes were on the disquieted couple. Robin's face is in his hands, while Farah is overwhelmed with what-ifs and wishes that are just too late.

Meanwhile, the Freelancer and their friends said nothing all the way to the Freelancer's apartment. The moment they're inside, the Freelancer excuses themselves to wash up in the bathroom. Huxley and Lasko didn't miss how they refused to look at them, making the boys worry even more. It wasn't until all of them lounged on the couch did Lasko begin the much-needed conversation.

"I used to imagine what I would say to my parents, you know," He says, eyes distant and sad. "I was their kid, and I loved them as much as they loved me right until my Magic started to manifest. And then it was like those years did exist. They didn't see me as their son at all. It was heartbreaking that Magic made me a stranger to them."

"Lasko, buddy..." Huxley doesn't really know what to say to that. Having been raised by amazing and kind Empowered parents, he knows he can't relate to Lasko and the Freelancer's trauma. But that doesn't stop him from loving and supporting them in any way he can.

Lasko just smiles ruefully. "They didn't understand that I didn't know what was happening. I was just as scared as they were. But they blamed me for something I couldn't control." Here, he lets out a long, drawn sigh. "I got out before things could get any worse, and while I'm happy where I am now, with you guys as my family, I sometimes wonder how would I react if my parents reach out to me." He then turns to the Freelancer, who has been listening quietly. "I would do exactly what you did in that cafe."

"How did you find me?" The Freelancer asks while trying to wrap the image of sweet and gentle Lasko going absolutely batshit insane like they did earlier.

Huxley answers, "Mine and Lasko's plan synced up, and we decided to get the smoothie on the same street. Oh yeah, we got one for you and Gavin too! It's in the fridge. Wait, dude, where was I? Oh right! Anyway, we saw you were with some strangers in that cafe, and then you started... screaming and standing up."

"We could feel your Aura burning up," Lasko adds. "Your Magic was going to explode, and we ran inside and heard half of what you were screaming about."

The Freelancer tips their head against the couch and rubs their temple. All that anger had finally left them with nothing but exhaustion. "Shit. I didn't know I was about blow Covert. Thank you for getting me out of there, guys. I owe you one."

Huxley displays his signature bright smile. "Don't sweat it, buddy! How are you feeling now?"

The Freelancer takes a moment to really assess themselves. What a day it has been. "Not gonna lie, I'm super exhausted, but I feel better now. Lighter. I don't think I'll ever regret what I said to them in that cafe. I don't intend to make amends with that woman or entertain Robin anymore. I want to focus on the family that I have now."

Their declaration made Lasko and Huxley huddle close for a group hug. Wanting to put the whole affair behind them, the Freelancer suggests that they all have dinner at their place. A quick call to Damien, and plans are set. The trio nap for a few hours until Gavin Rift home and immediately picks up on the lingering emotions surrounding them. During dinner, the Freelancer explained to him and Damien what had happened.

"I knew something was up when we were out for lunch," Damien points out. "You were shifty whenever your phone rang."

"You hid your feelings just enough for me to doubt myself, Deviant." Gavin chimes in; his eyes speak concern and a hint of pride. "We talked about this, Freelancer. I'm here for you; we're here for you. I might not be a Serenity Daemon, but I want to help you."

"I'm going to try to be more open with myself," The Freelancer promises. Not wanting to worry their friends anymore. They would need to bring this to their next therapy session, but at least they're on track to get better. "Thank you, Gavin. Thanks, guys."

Despite how terrible the Freelancer's day had gone, their night was filled with good friends and good memories.

The bridges between Farah and Ain were burned to ashes. Not broken. There was literally nothing left to mend, and Robin hates that he realised it too late. Hate how he reaches out to Ain with ignorance.

After the disaster of their first meeting, Robin begins to reflect on his decision to marry the woman he thought he knew. Farah was utterly inconsolable when Ain left with their friends. She remained that way when they managed to return to the hotel. It was only after Robin persuaded her to eat or drink something that Farah all but begged him to understand. That she never wanted to hurt her own child.

"Abused," Robin dazedly corrected her. His world tilted. "You and your ex-husband abused them, and you never told me about it." It took Ain all but screaming in his face to learn about his fiancée's sordid past.

That sent Farah into another spiral, but Robin was too distraught to do anything.

There was nothing left for them in Dahlia. With their tails tucked between their legs, the couple prepared to return to their city; heads heavy with different dilemmas. Robin is re-thinking his decision to spend his entire life with the woman he thought he knew, while Farah does everything she can to hold on to everything she loves while still hoping that Ain would one day forgive her.

And when their car drives into the bustling street that leads to the highway, the world arranges a moment where Farah catches Ain walking past the stores. A wide grin on their face, surrounded by men who clearly love and cherish them.

The picture of a perfect family.

#monotony's rambling #redacted asmr #fanfic #they/them pronouns #gender neutral s/o #tw: child abuse #tw: violence #tw: fantasies of revenge #freelancer (listener)#gavin #caelum #damien #huxley #lasko moore #will do the editing once i come back

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cat-arsenal · 2 years

Note

Angsty and soft oc asks but you can do as many as you want!! or all of them!! I wanna learn about your OCs!! PLEASE!! Pls info dump!!

<33333

That's too much freedom bro--!

For reference, here are all my Redacted OCS https://cat-arsenal.tumblr.com/post/672327376145907712/httpspicrewmesecretimagemaker1atjygp9evbd7x

I’m gonna go with uhhh the Mates, Honey, Sunshine, Starlight, Ridley, and Iseul!

CW: Discussions of trauma, injuries, disabilities, and allusions to self-harm; Redacted ASMR spoilers.

Angsty

2. How often do they have nightmares? What was their last one about? Ryder, thankfully, has very few nightmares, and they’re usually vague horror feelings without actual plot. Felix has a lot of general anxiety nightmares: late for work, no underwear at school, can’t find my boyfriend, etc. Occasionally an “Asher is dead” will sneak in. Nyx doesn’t have many nightmares, but they’re usually about Nyx or Milo getting hurt, or separated and then hurt. Post-Inversion, she dreams a lot that either the shades or the ward killed him, and wakes up crying and clinging to him. Tellin relives the day Guy almost drowned. Not often, but often enough to bother him. Ziva doesn’t have many nightmares, especially once Elliott started intervening on her behalf, but when one slips through, it’s about the car accident, almost always. Bellona has apocalypse dreams. The exact flavor of apocalypse varies, but it’s always expansive and exhausting and would be interesting if it was a book or movie and not their sleeping brain. Ridley has nightmares about helplessness, in some form or another. Being a child in danger, being an adult in danger, not being in danger but being unable to help someone who is...There are many reasons they decided to go into counseling. Iseul didn’t have too many bad dreams before--mostly the standard “late for class, never gonna be good enough for my parents” kind of thing--until he met Quinn. Now his nightmares are mostly about the attack. But he’s doing better now, mostly.

6. How do they handle mental/emotional pain Ryder lets himself feel his feelings, work through them the best he can either through crying, sleeping it off, beating on a punching bag, or talking to/cuddling his boyfriend. Felix is pretty good at letting things roll off their back, calm and comfortable. But when they get overwhelmed, they shut down and hide. Nyx compartmentalizes that shit until they’re alone and then breathes through it. Hurt is temporary. Tellin tries to keep his cool and then breaks down, culminating in an ansgt nap that usually leaves him feeling refreshed. Ziva tries to be active about it. “What’s bothering me and what can I do about it?” If there’s nothing to be done, then she just tries to rest and let it happen. Maybe Elliott will share a comforting dream with her. Bellona kinda just carries it around with them until it eventually blows up. They try to do breathing exercises or make plans about it but they just get overwhelmed. Ridley runs through their list of cool counselor tricks: controlled breathing, visualization, journaling, talking to loved ones, etc. Iseul hides it until he’s alone and then cries it out, texts friends, has some snacks, takes a nap.

10. What’s their biggest insecurity? Ryder is very confident in themself and their body, but every great once in a while, they feel bad about their fat and scars and stretch marks. Felix sometimes worries that they’re too rough, too mean, so they’re always certain to discuss everything they do with Asher before, during, and after. Nyx, despite her insistence that “scars are cool,” sometimes feels that they detract from her attractiveness. Milo loudly disagrees. Tellin’s brain mostly consists of ocean facts and he worries that it bothers people. Luckily, Guy, at least, loves listening to him ramble. Ziva knows she’s beautiful and capable, but she also knows how people look at disabled people. She sometimes has trouble getting around, and is very aware of eyes on her when she does. Bellona didn’t start figuring out their gender until they were grown, so they often worry they aren’t doing it right (even though there’s no “right” way to “do” gender.) Ridley has a lot of scars on their arms and legs that they hide with sweaters and long skirts. They’re terrified of anyone seeing and judging. Iseul constantly feels like he’s not enough: not smart enough, not strong enough, not handsome enough, not hardworking enough.

13. Do they put everyone’s needs before themselves or do they isolate themselves/shut others out? Ryder puts others first, but also keeps himself in mind and tries to balance everything. Felix and Nyx both try to act like they aren’t hurt or bothered and focus instead on others. Tellin regularly volunteers for projects when he already has a full plate, and would be trying to help someone while actively falling asleep. Ziva always puts other first, sometimes to her own detriment. Bellona does their best to help everyone else first, but they get overwhelmed quickly and will either leave the situation or stay and just shut down. Much of Ridley’s identity is tied to their counselor job. Their whole deal is helping people, however they can. Iseul tries to help people but will panic and need to hide.

Soft

2. What’s their perfect “sleeping environment” Ryder’s favorite place to sleep is David’s chest, regardless of the location. Felix likes either their bedroom or the living room in one of Asher’s lovely pillow forts. Fairy lights and an excess of pillows and blankets, with music or tv going on quietly in the background. Nyx can sleep anywhere but prefers a dark room with her boys (Milo and Aggro.) Tellin likes a softly lit room with ocean noises. Ziva just needs somewhere she can prop up her head and stretch out. Bellona genuinely likes sleeping on couches or in truck beds Ridley falls asleep at their desk half the time. An ideal environment would be dark, quiet, and cool (did not mean to be describing a cave but okay.) Iseul just needs to be wrapped up like a burrito in a thick comforter.

6. What’s something that will always make them smile no matter how many times they’ve seen it Ryder’s favorite sight is David’s sleeping face. Felix loves seeing Asher fully sucked into a game. Nyx’s favorite sight is Milo coming home, or coming home to Milo, regardless of time or form. Tellin’s favorite sight is Guy so invested in something (tv or game or food or fish) that he doesn’t notice Tellin looking at him. Ziva loves seeing a perfectly-made drink. Bellona loves seeing the stars. Ridleys’ greatest joy is seeing a student pleased with their schedule, or excited about a class, or having a breakthrough. Iseul grins even thinking about Shameless Interests, especially the concert where he first met Borealis.

10. Do they prefer cuddling or holding hands (platonically or romantically <3)? Cuddling: Ryder, Nyx, Tellin, Ziva, Bellona Holding hands: Felix, Ridley, Iseul

13. Do they have any pets? Ryder winds up taking back the cat from Michael because my town. Felix jokes that Asher is their pet (Asher shrugs.) Nyx has Aggro! Cat step-mom. Is thinking about getting him a sibling, though. Tellin has numerous fish and aquatic snails in tanks all around the house. Ziva has no pets but is planning to adopt a dog. Bellona’s family has a ton of goats and chickens and dogs and cats, but they don’t have a pet of their own. They want to take Avior to a shelter when they get out of hell and see if he bonds with a critter or two. Ridley has no pets, partially because they’re never home to care for one. Iseul’s apartment doesn’t allow pets (but Ziva has told him he can play with her dog!)

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astaroth1357 · 4 years

Text

Demon Brothers React to MC Getting Kidnapped by Lesser Demons.

Watch out for minor first half spoilers!!

Lucifer

Kicking himself because he has to find out through Mammon that the MC is missing and he didn’t notice their absence himself.

The second the alarm gets raised he gets into a state somewhere between coldly rational and extraordinarily furious.

Definitely still level-headed enough to rally and organize his brothers for a search party but there's nothing but seething rage just rolling off of him the entire time. Probably-could-have-made-another-Satan type rage.

How well he keeps his composure will be based entirely on how long the MC is MIA. The first hour or so will be mostly put together but past that he'll start to slowly unravel as the panic takes hold.

At one point he even gets snippy with Diavolo over the phone and that's when you KNOW that he's reaching meltdown mode.

If he's the first to find the MC, his #1 priority is to get them away from whatever scum grabbed them and take them to the closest safe place he can find. He'd scoop them up so fast they won't even know where he came from, just whoosh! How'd I get on this roof??

Only once they're out of harm’s way will he circle back and deal with their kidnappers personally. You better be sure any damage done to his human will be reflected a thousandfold back onto their attackers. Probably coming back to the MC with some blood on him and is not going to care.

Relieved to have the MC back but restricts them from going out alone after a certain time now for their own good. If they need something that badly, they can come to him.

Also strings Mammon up by his toes that night for losing them in the first place.

"By the time Cerberus gets to you, I'll be sure you're only my table scraps…"

Mammon

The first to notice that the MC was being oddly quiet (thank their father for his text spamming habit) then found their stuff scattered and abandoned at RAD.

Told Lucifer right away and, oh boy, he is a mess: talking a mile a minute, punctuating his sentences with expletives, on the verge of tears, whole nine yards.

He left his human alone for what?? Like five minutes, if even, to go to the library and get themselves kidnapped?! What kind of guardian is he?!?

Already searching the place top-to-bottom without being told where to go or what to do.

He actually ends up a strange inverse of Lucifer. While Lucifer will start panicking more over time, Mammon will start panicking less as his fear escalates to all out anger. Give it a few hours and he’s not even going to be able to keep his demon form under control anymore.

You know this boy is legging it across the entire Devildom himself waving around some kind of hand-drawn "Have You Seen This Human?" flyer looking for any leads at all.

If he were to find the MC first, his first action would probably be to plant his foot right in the face of whoever took them. Hard. Then repeat until their skull’s a caved-in mess on floor. No mercy this time, just pure protective rage.

Following the fight, you'd think he was just reunited with his lost puppy. Lots of crying, hugging, and blubbering out apologies even when the rest of his brothers show up.

Would pretty much be glued to the MC's hip for at least a week afterward and makes more of a point to hang off of them in public now. They're his human after all, can't have anyone else getting the idea of pulling a stunt like that again.

"MC!! What'd ya go runnin' off for?? We're goin' home after I take out this trash, got it!!"

Leviathan

Wouldn't really want to believe it at first because it just feels too unreal, like, the same thing happened to Henry in Episode 86 of TSL when he was kidnapped by enemies of the Lord of Fools and it was up to his true friend to track him down…

Suddenly remembers that Henry was also tortured while he was taken and that really sets in the panic.

Unsure of how to help at first because he knows he's just a useless shut-in but Belphie of all people is the one to remind him that he does have one big advantage over his brothers: a fucking navy.

In an act of surprising backbone, he more or less demands a full fleet of ships from Diavolo and (honestly to his shock) he gets exactly that to comb the Devil’s Sea while looking for MC. Lotan even helps out!

If he were to be the first to find the MC (presuming they are indeed on a boat or something cause 🤷‍♀️) those kidnappers really shouldn't have challenged the third strongest brother in his natural element, eh? Those who aren't automatically lashed in the face or flung overboard by his tail get hung by the leg over the edge of the ship for Lotan to pick off one by one.

Sails back to shore with MC booming with pride that he of all people finally got to be their hero! Will literally be so happy if MC ever brings it up again, doesn't matter how much time has passed.

Things would settle back to normal pretty quickly after that, but he now checks up on the MC a lot more often and will even leave his room for them if they need to go somewhere and don't want to go alone. Can't have this turning into a rerun, you know?

"You hurt my only friend… So drown."

Satan

One guess how the Avatar of Wrath took the news. It's not swimmingly.

Unless your definition of "swimmingly" is a murderous rampage of toppling furniture, breaking windows, and swearing to curse right about anything that moves, in which case aptly put.

He gets stuck in an anger-induced tantrum for a bit before finally getting snapped back into coherent thought by Belphie and putting those mystery novels of his to good use. Smart boi takes second to Lucifer himself in the search, suggesting good locations for his brothers scout based on what clues they have to go on.

Of course, he's not content to just to call orders from the sidelines and is out searching himself like he's on the goddamn warpath. Doors? Who needs doors? If anything the hole I made in your wall is more efficient.

Should he be the first to find the MC he would coolly and methodically subdue any kidnapper he can get his hands on, release his human, and bring them home as soon as possible. They've been through quite enough today and don't need to see anything he's got planned for the bastards later.

But the second that Diavolo puts them in the castle dungeon, you best bet that Henry 1.0 is going to the LEAST of their worries. Who's ever wanted to play a life or death game of hide and seek with a giant snake and the incarnation of Wrath itself? First one caught gets the "quick" death! Any volunteers?

Might give the MC a mild scolding for going out when they shouldn't have but otherwise is just happy to see them back and safe. May act extra soft towards them for a couple days, just until the nerves of the situation finally wear off.

"Don't mistake this for mercy. I assure you, I don't know the meaning of the word."

Asmodeus

Highkey freaking out, like, almost as hysterical as Mammon when he hears the news.

Being the Avatar of Lust, he of course knows there's a whole lot of creeps out there in the world and he is utterly terrified that his poor MC has fallen victim to one at that moment.

For once, all thoughts of himself and his looks are out the window. What? It's past 2am and MC is still gone? I can stay up another hour! Dry shampoo and a washcloth counts as a shower, right? Who the fuck cares, where's MC?? Somebody find them already!!

Pools his contact list with Satan's and starts reaching out across the whole Devildom asking for people to be on the lookout and offer tips. Also begs Solomon to use his magic to help in the search (which he's more than happy to do anyway because he cares about the MC too)

If he were to find MC first it'd be one of those rare cases where he'd be seen really truly enraged. No cute banter, no playful flirting, just telling those worthless scum-vats exactly where they belong and exactly how he's going to put them there. Is it any surprise that he's also madsick with a whip?

Crazy relieved that MC is free, but now it's on them to help him clean up and get back to his prettiest self. I mean, he worried himself half to death while they were gone! All this dirt and sweat going to take three, no four, bathes to fully clean off!! Best hop to it~♡

"Touch them one more time and I'm going to set fire to whatever landfill trash like you crawls out of!!"

Beelzebub

It can't be happening. It honestly can't be happening. First he loses Lilith and now MC?? He can't lose two. He. Can't. Lose. Two.

Pretty much the mantra going through his head as he tears the Devildom apart with his bare hands.

It's 1000x worse than how he gets when he's hungry because at least then he might stop when he finally gets fed. Now it's either find MC or wait until he collapses from exhaustion and hope he doesn’t leave the whole realm a smoldering crater before he gets that far.

There's no reasoning with him either, the best the brothers can do is steer him in a direction and let him loose.

If he found MC first he probably wouldn't even realize it for a bit, he'd just keep attacking whatever or whoever is in front of him on his path of blind destruction. It'd take the MC literally flinging themselves at him or throwing their arms around him to snap him out of it but then it's back to sweetheart Beel.

Hugs ensue. Really tight hugs. Probably a few tears and apologies too (even if it’s not really his fault at all).

Woe to anyone who tries going for the MC once he’s sure he has them because they WILL be broken then eaten. He’ll encourage his human not to look, but some things just have to be done.

Would absolutely carry MC back home and refuse to put them down until the others force him to. The floor may as well be lava planning on taking them away from him too.

Wouldn't care as much about personal vengeance as his brothers as long as MC is safe. He'll trust that his family will more than punish the kidnappers (though chances are he already took a chunk or two out of a few of them during his rampage anyway).

Protective instincts up by 100 after this, though Belphie usually steps in and eases him back a bit when he's about to get suffocating. MC never travels without a buddy now, ever. He just can't risk it.

"MC, I-I'm sorry… I just couldn’t lose you too…"

Belphegor

Keeps the coolest head of all the brothers on the outside, but there's a cold fury building up in those eyes.

Pretty much takes charge of whipping everyone back into gear with a combination stinging remarks and heavy duty guilt tripping. May not be the nicest method, but it's effective.

"Asmo, grow a freaking spine and do something useful for a change! Mammon, this your fault to start with so you ought to be breaking your ass to find them! Satan, watching you is getting embarrassing, pull yourself together and think like you're good at it!"

His harshest criticisms get saved for Lucifer (big shock) but he only dishes them out when he sees his older brother really losing his grip or teetering on losing hope. If the “mighty firstborn” can’t keep it together then why should they even listen to him in the first place?

When he's not administering "motivation," he's keeping tabs on Beel's progression through the Devildom and trying to minimize the damage there. He's the only one that can get through to him long enough to change his course if necessary.

If he were to find the MC first, well, unlike Satan he doesn't have the forethought to save the torture for later. It's happening right here, right now, and you better bet that being the last born doesn't stop him from being a force to be reckoned with.

Waits with the MC for his brothers to catch up to them and deal with any stragglers. May cuddle with them and look like he's trying to take a nap in the meantime, but in truth he's still very alert, on edge, and ready to absolutely wreck shit if anything gets too close to them.

Though it doesn't look like his lazy ass goes through the same protective streak as his brothers, he's a lot quicker to try and convince the MC to stay home now. No out and about=less chance of getting nabbed. Plus he keeps his favorite pillow, win-win. 😏

"What about your worthless lives makes you think you deserve my mercy??"

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #shall-we-date-obey-me

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lumpiya · 2 years

Text

okay so i listened to a bunch of eps of the freelancer series and there’s a lot to say

1. VEGA. FUCKING. VEGA. ISTG IF YOU TOUCH ME OR MY CHILD YOURE GOING TO BE PUNT INTO THE GROUND BUT AN INCUBUS, A FIRE ELEMTANAL, A WIND ELEMENTAL, AND AN EARTH ELEMENTAL. EVEN THE WAY HE TALKS IS FUCKING CREEPY BRO BLEHHHHHHHH

2. HUX YOU ARE THE BEST THING THAT HAS HAPPENED EVER SINCE THE REVERSE COMFRT CAELUM AUDIO- I WOULD LITERALLY BE FRIENDS WITH HIM IRL. ITS SO FUCKING SWEET THAT HE THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED FOR DAYS EVEN IF IT WAS A PERSON HE JUST MET. MY HEARTTT I LOVE HIM SM

3. LASKOS AUDIO MADE ME CRY. WHEN HE WAS ASKING “are you okay?” AND NOT ABOUT JUST THE BRIDGING THING BUT LIKE FL‘S MENTAL HEALTH IS ABOUT THE CLASSES THEYRE TAKING. I STARTED CRYING BRO- IF YOU HAVENT FIGURED OUT ALREADY I AM AN EMOTIONAL WRECK SO YAH-

but erik is a fucking god. this is one of his older works but it’s still so good. and the bad thing is i listened to the inversion ready cause i was scared that something would happen to one of the shifter boys- so i already know what happens to the DAMN boys during that.

#redacted asmr #redacted freelancer #redacted vega #redacted huxley #redacted lasko #redacted damn #freelancer series #deck kody 2022

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gffa · 3 years

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There was this viral tweet that went around about THE UNTAMED awhile back that was basically the cycle of every fan of the series that I have ever met: 1. Wtf, THIS is the show everyone is losing their minds over? This isn’t even good! 2. Well, I guess it’s not that bad, it’s pretty watchable and fun, it’s all right. 3. I would now die for these characters. So, when I swore this drama wasn’t going to be a big fandom for me, I was just going to watch the show and then fuck off again, I should have known better. Because here I am, crying about feelings about the entire cast and devouring fic and yelling at anyone who will spend even five minutes listening to me about how much I love the OTP, how much I love the Yunmeng Siblings and their Terrible Communications Issues, and the Tragic Sibling Duos and the Tragic Doomed Loves and The Cutest Juniors In The World and how I want to lock ALL OF THEM IN A ROOM until they sort out their feelings! THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - EMOTIONAL CONSTIPATION RUNS IN THE FAMILY - YUNMENG SIBLINGS FIC: ✦ Still in the Water by airgeer, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin ling & lan sizhui & jiang cheng, 45k A year after Jin Ling’s early succession to the position of Sect Leader, a letter is delivered to him under strange circumstances. A night-hunt follows. ✦ no one lights a candle to remember by asravine, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jiang yanli (& wangxian), 7.9k “Didi,” Wei Wuxian says softly. His thumb on Jiang Cheng’s cheek is calloused and warm and burns of affection. Jiang Cheng barely stops himself from leaning in. “Didi, don’t cry because of me.” ✦ can people untie themselves, uncurling like flowers by annemari, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji, 19.3k Wei Wuxian gets hurt on a night hunt. Jiang Cheng is displeased to find out that he’s been wandering around on his own instead of living with Lan Wangji in Cloud Recesses. He ends up fixing it. ✦ bark, bite by chashmish, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & lan wangji & jin ling (& wangxian), modern au, 3.4k Jin Ling finds a dog and learns some new things about his uncles. ✦ before you stumble by ribena, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui (& wangxian), 9.8k “Uncle,” Jin Ling says. “Just because Uncle Wei - I mean, Wei Wuxian - just because he’s leading the night-hunt, he’s teaching, he’s not doing anything wrong, he even notified you ahead of time -” ✦ Five Dogs, One Cat by ryfkah, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi & nie huaisang, 13.4k If you’ve ever believed me in anything, believe I want what’s best for Jin Ling, the first line of the letter reads. Jiang Cheng has to stop and take a moment before he continues on to the next line: You must come to Carp Tower as soon as you can and lavish praise on the ugliest dog I’ve ever seen. ✦ Life is Very Long by Vamillepudding, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi (& wangxian), 12.7k Wei Wuxian is a good for nothing, possibly evil, possibly fake uncle. But he’s Jin Ling’s good for nothing, possibly evil, possibly fake uncle. So it stands to reason that when Jin Ling starts to suspect that Hanguang-jun is mistreating his husband, he immediately recruits Jiang Cheng for a rescue mission. ✦ a symbol to remind you that there’s more to see by paperminds, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi & ouyang zizhen, 9.7k For as long as Jin Ling can remember, he has been immune to the majority of supernatural hauntings that plague the cultivation world. Or: what if Jin Ling had received his first-month birthday gift. ✦ plea from a cat named little plum blossom by rolameny, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling, 5.1k Jiang Cheng is trying. Jiang Cheng is having a very trying day. At least the cat likes him. ✦ JC and WWX’s Get Along Sweater by newamsterdam, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui (& wangxian), 29.6k Convinced Jiang Cheng and Wei WuXian will never reconcile of their own accord, Jin Ling takes matters into his own hands by trapping both of his uncles alone, together, without their cultivation. ✦ passed down like folksongs, our love lasts so long by finedae, wei wuxian & jiang cheng (& background wangxian), 6k winning a drinking contest, wei wuxian finds out yunmeng has got new folklore since he’s been gone. those are the stories of the Twin Prides of Yunmeng. naturally, he has to go confront jiang cheng for doing the opposite of talking shit about the dead; this is a confession of love. ✦ sorrow waited by curiositykilled, wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 2.3k No one gets out of the Burial Mounds alive and so Wei Wuxian cannot have been in the Burial Mounds — but sometimes Jiang Cheng starts to think it might be the inverse instead. No one gets out of the Burial Mounds alive and so Wei Wuxian didn’t get out at all. Someone, something, else crawled out. ✦ the trick is to keep breathing by alessandriana, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling, 3.4k Jiang Cheng probably should have anticipated the assassination attempt. He’d spent the last three weeks in Lanling browbeating the more intractable elders into supporting Jin Ling before his nephew’s first discussion conference, and he hadn’t exactly been kind about it. Still, he was a cultivator– if someone was going to try and kill him, he expected swords, or curses. Not poison in his tea. ✦ the road in leaves no step had trodden black by Skadiseven, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & wen ning & wen qing, 1.6k Jiang Cheng gets a little therapy session from Wen Ning, learns to plant potatoes, and decides he’s not giving up on something he wants. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - JUST STRAIGHT UP WANGXIAN OTP FIC: ✦ Fire in the Blood by Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle), lan wangji/wei wuxian, nsfw, 20.7k Wei Ying is traveling, and he gets busy. Lan Wangji knows that sometimes, Wei Ying forgets things. ✦ scapegoat by astrobandit, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 1.3k Four ridiculous things the Yiling Patriarch was blamed for, and one ridiculous thing that was positively his fault. ✦ Content Warning: Romance by Ariaste, lan wangji/wei wuxian, nsfw, 5.9k Wei Wuxian just wants a little warning before Lan Wangji says nice things. Lan Wangji just wants to love on his husband, thanks. ✦ Where the Lonely Ones Go by CSHfic, VSfic, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & cast, 23.9k Accidental (haunted) baby acquisition ✦ devotee by tagteamme, lan wangji/wei wuxian, NSFW, 5.8k Lan Wangji does not control Wei Wuxian. Not in the way many wish he would. But like this— ✦ nothing gold can stay by rikke, lan wangji/wei wuxian & cast, nsfw, 10.3k Before Wen Chao can throw him into Yiling Burial Mounds, Lan Wangji finds Wei Wuxian. ✦ Wait, What? by MarbleGlove, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan xichen, time travel, 1.5k AKA, that time sixteen-year-old Wei WuXian showed up at Cloud Recesses, took one look at Lan WangJi and declared, “That’s my future husband!” … and Lan WangJi said, “Mm” ✦ Beyond All Reach by airinshaw, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & nie huaisang & lan xichen, NSFW, 27.4k Wei Wuxian heads back to Cloud Recesses to find out more about a curse someone has placed on him, that appears to do nothing. Until he meets back up with Lan Wangji and finds out that what the curse really does is stop them from being able to touch. ✦ Key Differences by pupeez4eva, lan wangji/wei wuxian & cast, 5.6k Wherein Wei Wuxian ends up meeting an alternate version of himself who, much to his horror, never married Lan Wangji. Obviously he has to do something to fix this. ✦ the heart is hard to translate by vespertineflora, lan wangji/wei wuxian, NSFW, rough sex, non-con play, 10.8k The moment comes almost out of the blue when, one relaxed spring afternoon, Lan Wangji decides that he’s ready to offer Wei Wuxian an opportunity to play out that very delicious fantasy about their stolen first kiss. ✦ Pigtail Pulling by protos_metazu_ison, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & nie huaisang & lan xichen, 3.7k Wei Wuxian trips over Jiang Wanyin and sends both of them to the ground in a tangle of limbs and bruises. ✦ The Last Three Feet by etymologyplayground, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan sizhui & lan wangji, 3.7k A moment of down time in the Cloud Recesses. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - SOMETIMES YUNMENG SIBLINGS FIC, SOMETIMES WANGXIAN FIC: ✦ put your heart where your mouth is by protos_metazu_ison, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 19.9k Having lost a month’s worth of memories might have been fine if Wei Wuxian hadn’t managed to forget the part where he and Lan Wangji got engaged. If that was, actually, what happened. He hasn’t figured out that part yet. ✦ Orchids in Lotus Pier by Vamillepudding, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & lan xichen & jiang yanli & jin zixuan & cast, 21.6k Against all odds, Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng become friends. It’s just Jiang Cheng’s luck that people think they’re courting. And it’s just Lan Wangji’s luck that regretfully, Wei Wuxian is also People. ✦ Deeper grows my longing by feyburner, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 4.4k Jiang Cheng stared at him. “How are you this dense,” he said flatly. “Wei Wuxian. The common people aren’t scared of you, they’re scared of your husband.“ “My what,” said Wei Wuxian. ✦ A Civil Combpaign by Ariaste, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin ling/lan sizhui & cast, 31k “And,” said one of the pompous ministers, “there’s the matter of a marriage to consider as well!” Jin Ling, who at the beginning of that sentence had expected to slam into the very last wall of his patience and lose his temper entirely, paused. “A what?” ✦ Being Known by dragongirlG, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin zixuan/jiang yanli & jiang cheng/wen qing & nie huaisang & wen ning & lan xichen & yu ziyuan & lan qiren & cast, 36.3k wip Teenage Lan Wangji drunkenly confesses his lust for Wei Wuxian during the guest disciple lectures at the Cloud Recesses and wakes up betrothed to him by way of forehead ribbon. It all goes from there. ✦ heaven and earth as witness by scheherazade, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan sizhui, 8.5k Jin Ling has an emotional meltdown involving Lan Sizhui. Lan Wangji predictably overreacts. Somehow, it helps Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian finally have a conversation that they should have had years ago. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - SOMETIMES CASE FIC, SOMETIMES WANGXIAN FIC: ✦ grow by cafecliche, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan sizhui & the juniors, case fic, de-aged, 14.4k Or: Wei Wuxian is cursed on a night-hunt, and the junior quartet rapidly finds themselves in over their heads. ✦ Linger in the Sun by etymologyplayground, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & ocs & cast, 39.4k Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji find themselves cursed, unable to see or hear each other. They figure things out anyway. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - WHEN I WASN’T LOOKING, I DEVELOPED NIE BROTHERS FEELINGS FIC: ✦ Pushover by nirejseki, nie huaisang & nie mingjue & lan xichen & jin guangyao & cast, 1.9k Every once in a while, not often, people who know them well will say that Nie Mingjue lets Nie Huaisang walk all over him. That isn’t quite right. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - YOUR HONOR, HAVE YOU SEENA-YAO’S PRECIOUS FACE? - LAN XICHEN/JIN GUANGYAO FIC: ✦ half cloak & half dagger by Fahye, lan xichen/jin guangyao (& background wangxian), NSFW, 13.1k Jin Guangyao lifts his head and smiles. "I’m considering a problem.” “Can I be of any assistance with it?” He drops a kiss on Lan Xichen’s chest. With the nail of one finger he lightly traces the characters for irony on Lan Xichen’s side. “Not this one, er-ge.” ✦ Hindsight by clockwork_spider, lan xichen/jin guangyao, ~1k Three years after the incident at the GuanYin temple, Jin GuangYao and Nie MingJue’s coffin was unsealed and their corpses, depleted of resentful energy, were finally laid to rest, their spirits released. In his dream, Lan XiChen is visited by the spectre of his sworn brother. ✦ beyond reasons by welcome_equivocator, lan xichen/jin guangyao & lan wangji, 5.2k “a-yao,” he says, and you are almost surprised to hear it, but he is still facing away from you, “i know about the music.” ✦ Spring Dawn 《花落知多少》 by iskendaris, lan xichen/jin guangyao & nie mingjue, modern au/reincarnation au, 4.5k Meng Yao is given a second chance when he’s reincarnated. He doesn’t want a repeat of the past. However destiny has a way of interfering, and he finds himself working together with student president Lan Xichen?! Really, what is this fate?! ✦ Hold the Baby by Moonsheen, lan xichen/jin guangyao & jin zixuan/jiang yanli & lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 6.4k A collection of shorts: In which a chance encounter and a fussing baby causes a slight change to Jin Guangyao’s MO. ✦ Ornament by syriala, lan xichen/jin guangyao & nie mingue & lan qiren, 1.6k He starts to go into the bow again, and Lan Xichen intercepts his movement, stops him from bowing in a move that he might have learned from Nie Mingjue, and then his brain must short-circuit, because the only thought Lan Xichen has is that Meng Yao has the perfect height for forehead kisses. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - EVERY OTHER KIND OF FIC: ✦ fierce corpse Jin Zixuan by EHyde, jin zixuan/jiang yanli & jin ling & cast, 10.6k Jin Zixuan died at Qiongqi Path. Then, Wei Wuxian brought him back. But what place does Koi Tower have for a fierce corpse? ✦ The Past Didn’t Go Anywhere by FairestCat, jiang cheng & wen qing & lan sizhui, 2.3k There are rumours going around of a woman – a healer – travelling the countryside alone. Jiang Cheng needs to know if the rumours are true. ✦ If you only knew then (the things I only know now) by Nillegible, jiang fengmian/yu ziyuan & wei wuxian & jiang cheng & nie huaisang & lan wangji & & lan xichen & jin zixuan & cast, time travel (of a sort), 34.7k wip Yu Ziyuan receives a warning, a letter in Jiang Cheng’s handwriting, familiar, though it seems to have evened out over long years of practice. This was from her child, but not. This Jiang Cheng, grown up in ways that it hurt to contemplate, had endured the death of his family, his Sect, and his soul. ✦ partly frozen, partly flowing by astrolesbian, lan wangji & lan xichen & lan qiren (& background wangxian), 4.9k To discourage Lan Wangji from this idea would be to discourage him from loving, and Lan Xichen has always known that to be impossible. All he could do was nod as his brother looked at him, and finished, calmly, “Zewu-jun, I accept any punishment you see fit.” ✦ Delight in Misery by nirejseki, lan wangji & jiang cheng & lan sizhui & jin ling & lan xichen (&background wangxian), 17.4k wip For the first time in his life, Lan Wangji didn’t want to go home. (what if he had another option?) ✦ into the light of a dark black night by dragongirlG, lan wangji & lan xichen & madam lan, 3k On a snowy night in the dead of winter, Wu Yuhua, formerly known as Madam Lan, unexpectedly spends one last night with her sons before escaping from the Cloud Recesses. FULL DETAILS + RECS HERE

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