#and okay to be fair to ME i'm pretty sure that i've been burning the me candle at both ends for roughly six months

[veliseraptor]

me here like "i miss writing" meanwhile when i've had any time for writing lately you know what i'm not doing

#and okay to be fair to ME i'm pretty sure that i've been burning the me candle at both ends for roughly six months #so like......probably that's part of it #important text posts #this is my real life #confessions of a frustrated writer #can't wait until i at least have internet though. that'll help one thing #(the one thing is not having internet)

[heeliopheelia]

"mind saying that again?" (heeseung x reader)

genre: fluff word count: 0.7k requested by @icydawon ♡

warnings: suggestive towards the end!!

a/n: okay look idk what the fuck possessed me to end this drabble on such note but i couldn't help it 🤷‍♀️ i planned to keep it completely pg13 but my weakness for affection starved men took over again...

masterlist

With a giggle, you fiddle with the cool ring decorating his middle finger. You're too flustered to meet your boyfriend's gaze, and good for you because if you had, you'd probably end up burning in place at the softness twinkling in Heeseung's eyes as he looked at you.

His thumb rubs the skin of your hand gently before the two of you come to a halt in front of the bricked building of your apartment block.

"Well, text me when you get home, okay?" You ask, finally letting go of his hand and trying not to shiver at the sudden coolness of the crisp fall air hitting your warmed up palm. You tilt your head up to meet his pretty smile. "I won't fall asleep unless I'm sure you made it without getting yourself kidnapped. You're too pretty to walk alone at such hour, you know?"

He lets you pinch his cheek softly before he captures it in his own and moves it to his mouth to brush his lips over your knuckles.

"I'll make sure to do so. Wouldn't want my princess to lose her beauty sleep because of me, would I?"

You raise on your toes to press one last kiss to his cheek. "See you later. Love you."

Your whole world seems to come to a stop as you watch Heeseung's eyes widen with surprise. You suck in a sharp breath, realizing that you mindlessly blurted out the words that have been sitting heavily on your tongue for the past couple months.

Instantly flushing one more time this night, you raise your hand up and try to tuck the hair that the wind's carelessly messed up behind your burning ear.

"I- Uhm, yeah. You know," you stumble out, avoiding his gaze at all cost.

With his thumb and pointer finger, he lifts your chin up and holds it still as he watches the bashful expression blossoming on your face. He hums, eyes glistening at your state and he feels his heart swelling with adoration.

"Mind saying that again, love?"

"I love you too," he says with an uncontained grin. "Damn, you beat me to it. Wanted to be the first one to say it to you."

His voice only makes you weaker in the knees and you hate yourself for responding so eagerly to each and every word of his even after nearly a year of dating.

Feeling your face heating up and betraying you mercilessly, you slither out of his grasp and throw yourself on his body in an attempt to hide your flustered self. Burying your face in his chest, you can feel it vibrating with laughter as he wraps his arms around you loosely and presses his lips to the crown of your head.

"Shut up," you mumble into his chest but tighten your grip on his nonetheless.

"Oh, come on. Say it again, angel," he teases giddily, cold hands slipping underneath your jacket and hitching your sweater up, causing a rush of shivers to run down your spine as his fingers touch your warm skin. "Don't be mean, I've waited so long to hear it from you."

You scoff and pull away from him, raising an eyebrow. "Oh, really? How long?"

"So fucking long it's actually pathetic," he admits and pulls you close by your waist again.

You smile up at him, hand reaching up to cradle his cheek as you raise to your toes and lean up. "Well, if that's the case then I guess it wouldn't be fair of me to keep you on your toes for any longer," you whisper, mouth brushing against his as you press butterfly kisses one after another on his pink lips. "I love you, Heeseung."

And he fucking melts. He squeezes your middle as he ducks down and quickly captures your lips in a full kiss. You gasp in surprise at your boyfriend's sudden rush of eager affection and try to keep up with his greedy mouth.

"Say it again," he whispers into the kiss, hands coming up to cup your face and angle it better for him to suck your bottom lip absolutely maniacally. You're barely present, mind far away in the clouds as he repeats his words with a sudden neediness. "Say it."

And you do, tangling your fingers in his thick hair. "I love you."

"Again."

"Heeseung!" You gasp into his mouth, head dizzy from the lack of air in your lungs.

"C'mon, baby. It's just three words, you can do it."

"I love you."

And with a whine strangled in his throat, he pushes you backwards until you're leaned against the front door of your apartment block, shaky hands raking your pockets in a search for the keys.

"I love you too. More than anything else."

permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @luvmura @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @satoruskitchenrag @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @yoongspi @nichoswag @s00buwu @dazzlingligth

#carly's 1k event ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა #1k event: requests ✎ #enhypen #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen fluff #heeseung x reader #heeseung imagines #lee heeseung #lee heeseung x reader #heeseung fluff #heeseung drabbles #heeseung enhypen

[ouranbutworse]

Kyoya: I haven't gotten an F since I failed recess in second grade. I was a painfully boring child.

Kaoru: You're still boring now.

Kaoru: I hope Hikaru is okay, he can get pretty insecure when he's alone.

Hikaru at the other end of the school: Kaoru? KAORU?!

Mori: When Shania Twain says "let's go girls" I feel like I could kick a door off its hinges.

Tamaki: I wasn't sure what to get Antoinette for her birthday so I bought her the same Apple watch as me so we match.

Mrs. Ootori: Fuyumi, don't get pregnant. Getting pregnant with Kyoya was the worst mistake of my life.

Kyoya: I'm right here.

Mrs. Ootori: Oh right, I forgot. Apparently I tried to kick him away, like giraffes do at the zoo.

Kyoya: ... I'm doing so well emotionally.

Tamaki: Where do babies come from?

Yuzuru: Tamaki, I'm sure we've talked about this.

Tamaki: Yeah, but I'm blanking. Two guys, right?

Kaoru: Sorry, we have to leave early, Ageha's school called, she tried to play God at the science fair again.

Tamaki: I'll pay for your lunch, Haruhi!

Haruhi: Oh, okay.

Lunchlady: That'll be 100,000 yen.

Tamaki: ...What the fuck?

Mori: I love my friends. They never demand I speak. I can go nonverbal and listen to them like they're a podcast.

Kyoya: My smartwatch just congratulated me on my run and said I burned 300 calories... I was sat down eating a cheeseburger.

Tamaki: Hikaru, Kaoru, FBI agents don't hold hands!

Hikaru: These ones do!

Kaoru: Yeah, and they sleep in the same bed!

Honey: While we were in Boston I got this 10% off coupon, it saved me $90 at a bakery!

Mori: He saved $90 on a $900 purchase, and he's still happy about it.

Kyoya: Right, I'm leaving for my doctor's appointment. Please behave while I'm gone.

Kaoru: Still trying to find your soul?

Kyoya: Oh please, they gave up on that when I was less than a year old.

Hikaru: The oneesan from the train poster I fell in love with got pregnant, so I've been crying about that for a few nights now.

Kaoru: Next time, tell a therapist that instead of me.

Renge: Hey, what did you guys get for number twelve?

Kaoru: I got eighteen.

Haruhi: I got nine point five.

Hikaru: I got Abraham Lincoln... for some reason.

Hikaru: Can we ride our new scooters outside?

Kyoya: Do whatever, I'm not your mother.

Hikaru: Okay! Weee!

Kyoya: Not in the street!

Midwife: Halloween, what a day to go into labour, eh? I'll get a nurse to wipe the face paint off.

Reiko: No, I want to look like this. I put it on after I went into labour.

Akira: Hey, I just rolled over in bed and Hikaru is here with me. Is Kaoru with you?

Renge: Let me check... yes.

Akira: Great, I'll be there in ten to make the swap.

Kyoya: I'm getting blackmailed at school...

Fuyumi: What?!

Yuuichi: Nobody blackmails our baby brother but us!

Akito: Yeah, messing with Kyoya is a privilege, not a right!

#ouran highschool host club #ohshc #ouran high school host club #incorrect ohshc quotes #incorrect ouran quotes #tamaki suoh #haruhi fujioka #kyoya ootori #hikaru hitachiin #kaoru hitachiin #takashi morinozuka #mitsukuni haninozuka #reiko kanazuki #renge houshakuji #akira komatsuzawa #yuzuru suoh #fuyumi ootori #akito ootori #yuuichi ootori

[gummydummy19]

Month three (July): letters to Juliet

Summary: You haven't been able to get Sy out of your head since that dream, So...you decide to write him a letter.

Warnings: none

July 1st 2022 Dear Sy,

I don't know if time is flying by so fast for you too, but it sure is here. I can't believe it's July already... People have been putting up decorations for the 4th. I guess it made me think about you 'our boys over seas' or whatever I guess I thought it would be nice for you to get a little update on the home front. Everything is pretty chill here. The neighbors in 6D just got a dog. One of those tiny ones that look like microwaved tissue. They named him Lester. A pretty 'old man' kind of name in my opinion, but I guess that's fair because he looks about a hundred years old. I haven't burned the place down (yet). Although I did have a pretty close call last week when I tried to make a stir fry. I ended up ordering take-out, just to be safe. I bought some plants too, I hope that's okay. Well, I guess that's that then... I don't know if you're able to write back? Please don't feel obligated tho! I'm sure you're pretty busy? Fighting for the country and stuff...

Sincerely, your favourite roomie

18/7/22 18:47

Dear 'home front',

Your letter was unexpected but welcomed. I hope you enjoyed the 4th of July. I've been sweating my balls off, but aside from that I'm holding on okay. It's weird knowing there's someone waiting for me in my home while I'm here. Well, our home now I guess. 'Lester' is the most 6D name I've ever heard. Speaking of dogs, there's one here that's taken a particular liking to me. The guys here told me her name is Aika. I think her owner was one of ours, a long time ago. She's a tough one, survived on her own here all this time. I started spraying her with green dye, to keep her safe. Kinda works like a life jacket I guess. If we make it out of here together I'm bringing her home, I think you'd really like her.

Sincerely, Sy

July 29th 2022

Dear Sy, I'm glad you got my letter, and I'm glad I got one back. I can't remember the last time I had a penpal. Handwritten letters feel so old. It's nice I suppose. People are online too much nowadays. Oh god, now I sound old. I'm glad you made a friend, even tho she has four legs and a tail, I'm happy she's keeping you company. You better keep her safe, because I'm already excited to meet her. I'm sure Aika and Lester can become friends, either that or she thinks he's a squeaky toy and swallows him whole.

p.s: Aika, if you're reading this, please keep Sy safe as well, because I'm pretty sure the garbage disposer broke and he needs to fix it. Sincerely, your favourite roomie

______________________________________________________________

A/N; ALRIGHT OKAY I THOUGHT THIS WAS VERY CUTE......

taglist;

@metalbuckaroo

@princessayveke

@montsepliego

@scxrletrecsmarvel

@hopelesslyrogers

@eclecticpatrolroadlawyer

@tfandtws

@vicmc624

@ahahafudge

@enchantedbarnes

@wickedravyn

@pono-pura-vida

@amayaraestyles

@matchat3a

@fictional-hooman

@sebastianexplicit

@peaches1958

@avengersfan25

@jamneuromain

@tryingtoliveonmywishes

@mrsevans90

@daybreak96

@tiredqueen73

#gummydummy19 #fluff #fanfiction #smutty thoughts #captain syverson #henry cavill #a year in apartment 6b

[godsfavdarling]

chapter 10

pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!oc

summary: Spencer and Molly go further than ever before.

list of chapters, also available on wattpad and Ao3, my masterlist

warnings: smut: fingering, blowjob, protected sex (condom)

words: 3,2k

Molly spread out a towel on the sandy beach, basking in the warmth of the sun. She turned to Spencer with a playful smile, holding up a bottle of sunscreen.

"Spencer, would you mind putting some sunscreen on my back?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with a hint of mischief.

Spencer, momentarily distracted by the sight of Molly in her bathing suit, snapped back to attention. He cleared his throat, nodding a bit too eagerly, "Uh, sure. No problem."

As he applied the sunscreen, Spencer couldn't help but marvel at the way the sun kissed her skin, creating a gentle glow.

After Spencer finished applying sunscreen to Molly's back, she graciously took the bottle from his hands. With a mischievous twinkle in her eye, she said, "Alright, your turn. We can't have you turning into a lobster out here."

Spencer, well aware of his fair complexion, chuckled nervously, "Yeah, I burn pretty easily."

Molly, with a gentle touch, started applying sunscreen to Spencer's back. As her hands moved across his skin, Spencer couldn't help but shiver slightly at the sensation. 

Despite his usual aversion to the beach, Spencer found himself surprisingly content. The happiness radiating from Molly, her infectious laughter, and the joy she found in the beach atmosphere made it all worthwhile for him. 

He couldn't deny the simple pleasure of sharing these moments with her, making the beach, for the first time, a place he was more than willing to be.

.............................

Molly emerged from the bathroom with a smile, her eyes locking onto Spencer, who was perched at the edge of the bed, engrossed in his phone. The sight of his focused expression prompted her to ask, "Work? Do you have to go?"

Spencer looked up, his attention shifting from the device to Molly. "No, it's just about a case. Background stuff and some new developments, but I'm not going anywhere," he assured her.

"Good," Molly replied, relieved. She joined him on the bed, sitting down and staring at him with a contemplative expression. Spencer, sensing there was more on her mind, inquired, "What is it?"

She hesitated for a moment before responding, "Nothing. I've just been thinking..." Molly wrapped her arms around him, inhaling his comforting scent. 

Shifting her position, she settled onto his lap and looked into his eyes. With a soft smile, she asked, "Would you be interested in taking things further tonight?"

Spencer took a moment, contemplating the suggestion, which made Molly feel a twinge of worry. 

As she began to backtrack, apologizing and assuring him that it was okay, Spencer interrupted, saying, "No, no. Wait. I do want that... I just... didn't expect you to..." he admitted.

Molly couldn't help but smile at his response. "Spencer, I want it too. Every time you touch me, I feel like I'm gonna explode, and I trust you, obviously. So, I don't see why... we should wait... Do you want to wait?" she asked.

Spencer chuckled, his eyes reflecting a mix of amusement and desire. "No, I don't want to wait." he replied, his fingers gently tracing the outline of Molly's hand.

Molly grinned, her playful side surfacing. "Well, then, what are we waiting for?" she teased, her tone laced with anticipation.

Spencer pulled her into a passionate kiss that spoke volumes of their shared longing.

As they broke the kiss, Molly couldn't help but laugh, the nervous energy dissipating. "You smell really good," she confessed, running her fingers through his hair.

Spencer grinned back, his voice filled with sincerity. "Likewise. You smell like sweet fruit."

Molly's eyes sparkled with amusement. "Oh, so we're exchanging fragrance compliments now?" she teased, her fingers still entangled in his hair.

Spencer chuckled, a playful glint in his eyes. "Why not?"

Molly leaned in, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. "Well, you, my dear Spencer, smell and taste like candy."

Spencer's grin widened, and he leaned in to whisper in her ear, "Really?"

Molly couldn't suppress her playful giggle as she nestled comfortably in Spencer's lap. "Really." she teased, her fingers tracing gentle patterns on the back of his neck.

"Do you have condoms?" Molly inquired, her tone a blend of curiosity and anticipation.

"Yeah, I do," Spencer replied with a confident yet playful smirk.

"Came prepared for a trip?" Molly teased, raising an eyebrow.

Spencer chuckled, a hint of sheepishness in his expression. "I...Umm... I was... I was just silently... hoping," he confessed and she kissed him.

His eyes sparkled with amusement as he gently picked up Molly and laid her on her back and positioned himself above her.

As Spencer's lips trailed along her neck, Molly's fingers instinctively found their way to his cheeks, gently cupping them as she savored the sensation of his warm breath against her skin.

 Each kiss he planted sent shivers down her spine, igniting a fire within her that threatened to consume her completely.

His lips continued their journey, exploring every inch of her skin with a tender reverence that made her heart race. She felt his touch linger on her collarbones, his breath sending waves of pleasure coursing through her body. 

With each caress, she found herself melting further into his embrace, lost in the intoxicating sensation of his touch.

Molly's movements grew more restless beneath him, unable to contain the desire that burned within her. She shifted beneath him, her body moving in rhythm with his as she sought to draw him closer, to feel every inch of him pressed against her own.

With each kiss, each touch, she surrendered herself completely to the ecstasy of their love, lost in a whirlwind of desire and longing. And in that moment, as their bodies entwined in a passionate embrace, Molly knew that she was exactly where she belonged—in Spencer's arms.

As one of his arms outstretched between her thighs, the other bent as he hovered over her.

Molly's breathing pitched into a soft moan as she felt his fingers press against her underwear. Moving softly but with intent, his index and middle finger rubbed upwards, careful to barely brush against her covered clit, just where she needed him most. 

Her hips shifted at the pleasure, lips parting as another moan escaped her.

She felt herself growing wetter and she knew he could feel it too.

She reached for his neck to pull him down into another kiss. In the meantime, his fingers brushed the edge of her underwear aside and as his fingers slipped against her pussy, she gasped into his mouth.

Finally, after a few moments, his fingers slowly came to her clit, and she felt every nerve sizzle in her body at the feeling.

"You're so wet" he moaned into her ear and then pressed another kiss to her lips as his fingers slowly slipped inside of her, and she suppressed another moan into his mouth. 

He moved slowly, collecting her wetness and teasing her. Her hips bucked lightly, chasing the feeling.

His touch felt like electricity as his fingers run against her clit, and her body tensed as the pleasure swam through her. She already felt spent and yet he was still clothed.

Her head and shoulders fell back onto the bed as his fingers picked up their pace. He alternated between slipping inside of her and pressing his thumb against her clit, until the energy building inside of her threatened to spill over. 

Her hands found his shoulders and her fingernails dug into them at the pleasure. His mouth didn't leave hers.

Finally, with one last roll of his fingers, she felt the wave crash into her. 

Spencer's mouth swallowed the last of the moans escaping from Molly's lips as his fingers rode out her orgasm, his thumb occasionally brushing against her sensitive clit, causing her to twitch.

"You did so well. I love seeing you like this." he whispered.

She pushed up on his shoulders and he allowed it, the positions reversing until she straddled his hips. 

His hands came up to her waist, gripping it as she slowly rolled her hips over his. 

His desire was evident in the bulge of his boxers, and it gave her immense satisfaction to know she had the same effect on him as he did on her. She slipped her hand into his underwear.

He released a quiet groan at the feeling of her touch, and she wanted to hear more. His fingers came away from her hips to divest himself of his shirt.

She slid from off his hips and stood at the side of the bed, leaning over to tug him towards her by holding his hand. 

He sat at the edge of the bed now and Molly felt herself grow even wetter as she sank to her knees in front of him. He watched with dark eyes as she began to pull his underwear down.

He was long and thick in her hand, and his head fell back as she leaned forward and licked a trail from his shaft to tip. Slowly, she took him into her mouth, licking and sucking his length until she could take him no more.

A deep growl emanated from Spencer's chest, his hand coming up to rest against the back of her head. 

He let her set the pace, but his fingers knotted themselves in her hair as she swirled her tongue around his tip, tasting every last inch of him.

He sighed, his jaw clenching and his muscles tensing. She could see he desperately wanted to move his hips, but stayed in full control as she pressed him deeper into her mouth.

She placed her hands on his thighs to give herself more balance, and she felt his fingers brush the hair away from her face and behind her ear before lightly collecting it into his grip. The small gesture made her heart skip as she set a quick rhythm.

He groaned again in pleasure, allowing himself a few more moments before delicately tugging on her hair to bring her back up to standing position. 

In a flash, he turned them around and laid her on the bed again.

She felt his strength emanating from every muscle, both hands pressed on either side of her. Using one hand, he tilted her jaw until her neck was exposed to him. 

He placed gentle half-kiss-half-bites along the slope of her neck. His hand then dipped to her back where he quickly pulled up her shirt and slipped it off her. Her underwear was tugged down until it fell to the floor. Her body softly settled on the bed.

"You're so beautiful." He murmured, his hand coming up to cup her breast, thumb tracing over her pebbled nipple. Molly sighed at the feeling.

Spencer's body was just as beautiful, she thought. The expanse of his chest was strong, his abdomen and arms both lean with taut muscle. A deep V-line followed into his hips, his dick erect.

Just as their lips moved to reconnect, Molly's eyes met his again. Both were entrenched in their desire, desperate for release in the other's body. 

Nervousness bubbled up inside of her again as she realized it was time. Everything else they had done before, but not this.

He rose from his spot for a moment "Stay here," Spencer requested.

"Okay," Molly responded with excitement in her voice.

As Spencer swiftly opened the box in the nightstand, a sense of eagerness filled the room. 

He carefully extracted the condom from the package and put it on himself. Returning to his position above her, Spencer said softly:

"We'll go slow. Tell me if anything's wrong or you wanna stop, okay?"

"Okay, promise" Molly nodded at his kind words, fingers reaching up to his shoulders again. He balanced on one arm as the other reached out to touch her slick heat, and instantly, she felt the unreleased desire come flooding back. 

Satisfied, Spencer slowly guided himself between her legs and at first rubbed his tip between her folds. Then he gently slipped just the tip in.

Her chest arched upwards at the feeling as her pussy stretched to accommodate him. True to his word, he moved slowly as he rolled his hips towards her, sinking deeper into her with every breath. She could feel him gauging her reaction and moving only so long as she allowed it.

Molly felt as though she might burst from the feeling, her breathing devolving into moans as he settled himself to the hilt inside of her. 

One of her legs was bent, the other laid straight, and one of his hands gripped her thigh as he used the other to balance himself over her, watching her face.

Once the small burn of the stretch passed, pleasure began to trickle in.

"Are you alright?" he said with his lips on hers and her hands on his cheeks.

"Yes- yes." Her eyes fluttered closed.

"Does it feel good?"

He slowly rolled his hips back and she let out an involuntarily moan at the feeling of him moving inside of her. When he rolled his hips forward again, pleasure erupted from within her, and her nails dug into the skin of his shoulders.

"Yes... Oh God!"

Spencer pressed a kiss to her lips, and set a slow but sensual rhythm to his hips as he moved in and out of her with deliberate care. 

Any discomfort long forgotten, Molly felt her own hips moving in tandem, hissing in delight at the friction their hips created.

He chuckled at her reaction. "You feel so good"

The praise was like an extra dose of kerosene to the flame.

"Please, Spencer- more."

"More what? Hm?"

All the while, he never stopped moving, his hips picking up a faster pace. 

In that moment, the hand resting on her thigh slipped between their two entwined bodies. His fingers immediately located her clit, and the combination of him pumping in and out of her, and his thumb pad rolling against her clit, made her moan nearly turn into a scream. She could hardly think past her own name.

"Use your words, baby. Tell me what you want."

But she couldn't. Her nails digging crescent shaped impressions into his skin.

"I'm so close, please..."

"You're so tight." he groaned, his head falling to watch his dick slip in and out of her soaked pussy.

Her strangled moans tumbling through her lips as he pounded into her, hitting her g-stop making her squeal.

"F-faster." she gasped.

He complied, snapping his hips forward at a faster pace. He grunted, his head falling so he could suck on her neck, covering as much of her skin with kisses as he could.

She felt her high approaching her once again, eyes rolling to the back of her head as she moaned. "I-I'm close." she said, her chest heaving.

"Fuck, me too." he groaned, his pace quickening, quickly bringing her to another orgasm with a loud moan, causing her to clench her walls around him, letting him bottom-out in her as he came, a groan leaving his lips.

They remained in that tender embrace for a minute. Spencer gazed at her with a mixture of affection and desire, and then, as if unable to resist, he began to pepper kisses all over her face.

Molly couldn't help but giggle at the sweet onslaught, feeling the warmth of each kiss. In response to his affectionate gestures, Molly decided to reciprocate. 

With a playful glint in her eyes, she captured Spencer's lips with hers.

He pulled out, Molly whimpering at the emptiness as he rolled over.

Turning towards him, she noticed his eyes closed as he gradually regulated his breathing. When his eyes reopened, meeting hers once more, she found herself already locked into a gaze with him.

"Hey, Spence..." she started. He nodded, letting her know to continue. She bit her lip, "Wanna take a bath... together?" she shyly questioned.

He smiled, bringing his hand up to cup her cheek. "Yes please."

Spencer rose gracefully from the bed, extending a hand to Molly and helping her to her feet. Their fingers intertwined, he guided her towards the bathroom, the anticipation of shared moments painting the air around them. 

He turned on the water to fill the bath, the sound providing a soothing backdrop.

In the bright bathroom light, Molly instinctively crossed her arms over her chest. Spencer, ever perceptive, noticed and tenderly grasped her wrists. "Don't be shy in front of me," he urged, his eyes filled with genuine admiration. 

"You're the most beautiful girl in the world, and every inch of your body is absolutely spectacular."

Molly smiled, her eyes glistening with gratitude. "Thank you," she whispered.

As the water continued to fill the tub, Molly asked "Can you leave for a second. I need to pee". 

"You can pee in front of me. I don't mind." Spencer said as he disposed the condom in the trash can.

"Are you serious?"

He checked the water temperature and, with a sincere smile, got into the bathtub. "Absolutely," he affirmed. "I won't look if you prefer, but you have nothing to worry about."

"...Okay," Molly said as she settled on the toilet. "Don't look!"

"I won't!" Spencer assured her, complying by covering his eyes with his hands as he settled onto one side of the bathtub. 

As she relieved herself, Molly couldn't shake the feeling of awkwardness that hung in the air. She couldn't remember ever being in such close proximity to someone while performing such a private act. 

"Okay, now you can look," Molly announced  while flushing the water. She deftly pulled her hair up with a claw clip and gracefully stepped into the bathtub on the opposite side of Spencer.

Sensing an opportunity for shared intimacy, Spencer reached for her, gently turning Molly around until her back rested against his chest. The warmth of the water enveloped them as Spencer wet the sponge and applied gel, beginning to tenderly wash Molly's body.

As the sensual act unfolded, Molly relaxed into the embrace, the soothing sensation of the water and Spencer's touch.

Spencer, seeing how relaxed she is, moved his hand from her stomach to her center. Molly gasped and looked up at him. He kissed her lips and began circling her clit.

"Spencer... I don't think I can do that again," Molly confessed, uncertainty evident in her voice.

He responded by kissing her once more, his touch applying a bit more pressure to her center.

"I think you can. Tell me if you want me to stop,"

Molly's lips quivered, a suppressed moan escaping.

"Come on, I want to hear you," Spencer encouraged.

"The last one," Molly whispered, a mixture of excitement and restraint in her voice.

"The last one," Spencer echoed.

Molly didn't need long, still sensitive, it only took a couple of Spencer's skilled moves to make her unravel. She sank into his chest, her head nestled under his chin, as he began to massage her legs. "You did so well. I knew you could do one more," Spencer whispered, his voice a gentle reassurance in the intimate aftermath.

She turned around and squeezed him tightly to her body. "Can you hold me for a second?" she asked.

"Of course," Spencer replied, his arms enveloping her. "I'll hold you as long as you need." And he began to place tender kisses on her face, each one a gentle reassurance of his presence and care.

"Spence... I love you," she confessed.

He asked, almost in disbelief, "You do?"

"Yeah, I do," she affirmed with a smile.

"I love you too," Spencer replied.

She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "Can you say that again?" she pleaded.

"I love you. I love you so much," he repeated, his words filled with genuine emotion. He kissed her lips with hunger and love, sealing their confessions in a passionate embrace.

#keep holding on #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x oc #criminal minds smut

[finite-breakpoints]

a little too late (Angstpril 2024, #12)

Julia's been dreading this, as much as she hates herself for it.

"It's not like I'm gonna move across town or anything," Siv had said -- as reassuringly as he's capable of, which isn't always saying much. "But this project feels like it should be its own thing."

That was half a macrocycle ago.

He's not moving across town. Not even leaving the garage, really, just over to the new wing they've just finished. It's a well-designed space; bright and colorful and open, with those giant panes of mirror-glass windows along the wall.

About ten cycles ago, he'd finished moving his equipment over. About half of that crowded workshop now fits comfortably in one corner. A set of tools on the workbench, a few half-finished sketches pinned to drafting tables, several still-packed boxes.

"…So what do you think? Too much?"

He sounds like he's been overthinking this -- it's your shop, what I think about it doesn't matter; you were the one who decided you needed a whole separate space and an apartment to yourself--

Nope. Not going there.

"It's beautiful. Absolutely perfect for you, too." Julia cracks a smile. "Not a drawer in sight, huh?"

"Yori's idea. Should help me keep track of everything a little better." He shrugs nonchalantly, self-aware enough at this point to know better. "Should being the operative word there."

"Wouldn't count on it. You'd lose your own disc if it wasn't attached to you."

"Rude. But yeah, y'know what, I guess that's fair."

"She's not wrong! I've seen you lose datapads while they're still in your hand." Yori sets a box down on the nearest workbench, then raises an eyebrow. "Okay, look, this has been bothering me all cycle. Your hair's up off-center."

"Does it matter?"

"If you want to be seen with me in public, yes."

"…Alright, alright." Siv laughs sheepishly, reaching up to re-adjust the clip holding it back. "Better?"

"Slightly. --Do you want your light-sculpture stuff down here, or up in your office?"

"Uh… good question. I hadn't thought that far ahead."

"Office, then." Yori grins, clearly up to something -- Julia's seen that look enough from Siv to know it means trouble. "I'll be back in a bit."

"Just leave my tools alone--"

"No promises."

"Yori."

"I'm kidding. Don't burn out any circuits over it -- I know better."

"Sure you do." But he doesn't argue with her -- just rolls his eyes as she walks away. "Sorry. What were we talking about?"

"Nothing, really. It's fine." Julia shrugs -- when was the last time they had talked about anything that actually mattered? "It's been weird, not tripping over each other all the time."

"Yeah. A little bit. But we'll get used to it, and it's not like I'll never be around. I'll walk you back -- I'm pretty sure I forgot a datapad in your apartment."

It's just the other side of the garage, but it might as well be the other side of the Grid.

There are worse things than a stray datapad. The empty spaces, where the shelves used to be, that greet them when they walk through the door. The silence at the start and end of every cycle. The simple reality of this apartment being hers, not theirs.

"Heh. Go figure." And sure enough, there it is, sitting abandoned in the chair by the window. Siv picks it up, frowns at the blinking red charge-level light, and tucks it into his bag. "Thanks for the help. I'll see you later."

"No problem. And hey--"

He's halfway across the room now. Quiet exits, as always. "Hm?"

Julia knows this is a bad idea, but some stupid, impulsive part of her can't help it. You don't have to leave -- but it's a little too late for that, now. He's already gone, has been for half a macro -- on to the next adventure.

"…I love you," she says instead. So much. Enough to let you go. "You know that, right?"

"Yeah." He stops in front of the door -- really stops, not one of those five-tick pauses -- and offers her the smallest of smiles. "Love you, too."

He means it, in his way.

And then the door closes behind him.

#finite states prologue #julia #siv #yori #angstpril 2024 #breakpoints archive

[mlobsters]

supernatural s11e20 don't call me shurley (w. robbie thompson)

late start because i was determined to make pumpkin pie from scratch today (for thanksgiving tomorrow) but didn't start until later in the afternoon. it's out of the oven and rough and ready, as paul says :S

how long is metatron gonna keep popping up? aren't we done with him yet. oh, is this when we learn about chuck finally?

CHUCK Okay. That's fair. Mildly constructive. Still, It doesn't justify you... burning one of my books though. METATRON What are you talking about? CHUCK Tall Tales. You were monologuing to Castiel and you threw one in the fire.

LOL if ever there was an episode i would like to throw in the fire, tall tales is it. good one, robbie

okay sprinkling beer on your shirt to iron it.... seems like a really bad idea in a variety of ways. nothing says profesh like smelling like beer :P

LOL okay, just trollin sammy, got it

METATRON Well... it's an Oscar-worthy performance. But... how did nobody know? I mean, wh-what about that amulet thingy? Y-You told me about it, some... silly charm that burned brightly in the presence of you? CHUCK You mean this? METATRON Yes! Dean had it! And your fav— Castiel. They were around you. How did it never— CHUCK I turned it off. See? I should really put this away. You'll never guess where this thing has been this entire time.

have known some broad strokes amulet fixit stuff, i think i skimmed the wiki page on it when dean tossed it originally because i'd read so much amulet fixit fic i was curious if they did anything in the show. kind of like the voicemail that got changed, that one i can never keep straight what happened in canon vs fic :p i was so sure they addressed it in the show!

CHUCK Last time I saw that look on an editor's face, I just handed in Bugs. All right, come on. Safe place.

that one could have done with some heavy editing, but there was some good brother moments in there! i snorted, nonetheless

having a hard time staying focused on this writing his memoir thing. kind of navel gazing about writers and i'm just waiting for the point to arrive :p that god is ready to let the world get wiped out? is that the point?

METATRON Why did you create life? CHUCK I was lonely.

perennial question of where are the other deities in this equation

CHUCK I took responsibility for her, too. Locked her away – barely, I might add. And who let her out? METATRON Sam and Dean Winchester. But they're trying to fix that. CHUCK You know I love those guys, but the world would still be spinning with Demon Dean in it. But Sam couldn't have that, though, could he? And so how is Amara being out on me? METATRON It's not. But I-you helped the Winchesters before. CHUCK Helped them? I've saved them! I've rebuilt Castiel more times than I can remember! Look where that got me.

look indeed. this feels like the more plastic sort of fanservice. we're gonna address so many things!

rob sheridan and curtis armstrong are doing a good job, curtis is nearly making me like metatron calling god to task, but i also don't really care 😔

this whole fog thing and sam getting infected feels really contrived and random too? buh.

SAM We're not gonna make it. DEAN No, no, no. There's no quitting here. SAM We're never gonna make it. DEAN Sam, listen to me. That's not you talking. It's the fog. SAM You were gonna choose Amara over me. Over everything. DEAN Sam, no! SAM Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that, Dean. I can't fight this. You got to go. You have to get out before you're infected. SAM Go before I hurt you! DEAN No, I'm not leaving you – ever!

should be hitting some emotional buttons but i'm just 😐 didn't sam just almost die literally a couple episodes ago? not even pretty pictures of them because it's so foggy

s11e20 - samulet sparkle / twilight - this is the skin of a killer, bella

i mean i get it, it's kind of a generic twinkly sound but this is immediately what my brain went to

the only reason i got any emotional kick of out of this sequence was rob's singing, and the song choice. and the way metatron reacted, i mean that's some turn around that he can look so concerned and sad and taking on the fare thee well lyrics that he could wring a few tears out of me. [coming back to this, the script notes are for positive emotions but i did not get that, and this song is... sad????]

all right so i was fairly sure there was some stuff in the script about the samulet so

okay so. i cheated and knew he kept it. but are we to believe he was carrying it around on his person? that can't be right :p because it would SURELY have gotten lost a million times. would be a downright miracle even if it was locked up somewhere safe. anyway. hurray for samulet fixit? what a weird fucking episode though. again, maybe i'll like it better with some distance and some builtin expectations for emotions.

(more tears though listening to various artists singing dink's song / fare the well on spotify - marcus mumford, my fave, and oscar isaac have a version that's lovely)

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 11x20 #twilight #spn clip #spn musical score #i guess? #fare thee well #dink's song #robbie thompson #Youtube #rob benedict

[phoenixwatchesmovies]

What I'm Watching: November 2023

The Fall of the House of Usher

Sycrhjodxfhbaudiffebuvehtxt I'm obsessed with this show. So far, this is the first and only Mike Flanagan adaptation where I was familiar with the source material already, and it was a fucking BLAST playing Spot The Reference. Additionally, the conclusion of the rave scene has been burned into my memory ever since and I cannot for the life of me get it out of my head, in the best and worst way possible. Sooooooo good, but oh my fucking god. And it's been a long time coming, but this series has elevated Carla Gugino for me to Rachel Weiss meme status. You know the one I'm talking about. I just.... THIS SHOW IS SO FUCKING GOOD. The writing, the story, the performances, the cinematography, the scares, the all of it. It's split down the middle between stuff you can point and go "ha! I knew it!" and stuff you just can't see coming, and it's all top tier. I typically need a cool down period to recover after most Flanagan stuff, but I'm just itching to get back to this one as soon as possible. Is a good amount of that just me thirsting over Verna? Well, yeah. It's pretty much Gugino's show, and everyone else merely appears in it. Actually, that's not fair. Everyone involved not only fucking went for it, they fucking nailed it. This is Mike's last run with Netflix, and by god, the whole team went out with a bang.

Cowboy Bebop (2021)

Let me start by saying that my post mentioning how much I wanna bang Spike went as viral as things tend to go on this blog, so I'm glad that resonated with some folks. 😂 I'll admit, I have a lot less nostalgia for the anime as a lot of the audience for this, having only seen it twice, but as far as adaptations go, this was perfectly okay. As someone pointed out already on one of my posts, it's a lot less existential than the OG, and therefore a lot less heavy. And since all I wanted out of this was a good time, I was happy with it. I was EXTREMELY happy with the opening credits in particular. My stance on adaptations in general is that if a piece can stand on its own merit, I don't care how closely it adheres to the source material, and in my opinion, the live action succeeds. In fact, my one and only complaint is...not enough Ein!

Anne With An E

The books stay in my reading rotation, so despite my philosophy on adaptations, I had very high expectations going into this several years late, don't worry about it. And...I was not disappointed. I ended up crying over almost every episode, and that never happens, so... 😅 It's so sweet and I was charmed from the get-go. I've still got a season left, and since it seems to be doing its own thing apart from the books now, I'm really looking forward to it. I'm also dreading it, because I'm not ready for it to be over. Then again, that's how it feels finishing the books as well, so that's only how it should be.

Five Nights At Freddy's

Lemme tell you, I've known jack shit about FNAF aside from "evil Chuck E. Cheese" for years now. I've had the tags filtered for almost as long as I've been on Tumblr (I love the people I follow, but I gotta curate my experience). I've made it my mission to go as long as I can without knowing anything at all about this franchise if for no reason other than it's fucking e v e r y w h e r e and I was sick of the overexposure. But now because a relative of an acquaintance of a family friend was one of the cannon fodder characters, I got roped into watching this and my streak is broken. I can't unknow what I know about this franchise. Which I'm extra annoyed about, considering what the creator of the games tends to put his royalties towards. 😑 From a film standpoint, it's fine. I'm not sure what age range the target demographic is, but having the horror stuff happen off screen made it feel more vanilla than the average episode of Supernatural, and I'll let that speak for itself. The look and atmosphere were exactly what I'd imagine if told to picture an evil Chuck E. Cheese, the animatronics are appropriately creepy (though let's be honest, it doesn't take much to make ANY animatronic creepy), and I was a little surprised and impressed with the soundtrack. And it was nice to see Josh Hutcherson in something new, though it's still so odd seeing him as an adult. I'm most familiar with him as a kid in RV, and holy fuck, I feel old looking at him now. I could have used a little more Matthew Lillard--why would you get Matty Lilly in your movie and then NOT do something with him?!--but given the character/story/what have you, I get it. One plot point in particular didn't stick the landing, as far as I'm concerned. In an effort to tie up all loose ends, it made things too contrived in a "that's convenient but now it makes less sense" kind of way. Don't know if that's how it goes in the game, and I don't care enough to find out. All in all, I've seen worse, I still don't get the hype, and I'm still not the target audience. And that's perfectly okay.

Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet Of Curiosities

A horror anthology? With GDT?? Sign me up yesterday! I don't think there was a single episode I didn't like. And I wasn't prepared to recognize so many names in the credits. Actors, directors, composers, authors, you name it. And it was fun! The stories were bizarre, assorted creature designs were gnarly, and whatever else was going on with the vibes episode to episode, they all felt consistently creepy and sinister. "The Autopsy" has the distinction of being one of the few things I've watched that almost made me puke. "Pickman's Model" was the first thing to freak me out bad enough I stayed awake to get it out of my head in a Very Long Time. "The Viewing" was the only ending that felt unfinished, it was so abrupt, but the style and aesthetic was so *chef kiss* I'll overlook it. (Side note: that episode's director also did Mandy, which I've been meaning to get to for awhile now? Hoo hoo, have I got some visuals to look forward to!) I knew as soon as I saw Jennifer Kent did an entry that hers was going to be my favorite, and that's not even coming from a biased place. "The Murmuring" is beautiful and heartbreaking. Easily my favorite aspect of the series is how you get a sense of each individual director's style BUT the entries themselves are so flavored with GDT, the whole thing stays cohesive. Now all I can do is hope for another season. :D

#watch a thon 2023 #the fall of the house of usher #cowboy bebop netflix #anne with an e #five nights at freddy's #guillermo del toro's cabinet of curiosities

[jollyreginaldrancher]

Yellowjackets S2 e8

I don't like the emphasis on the word hunt in the Lottie part of the recap.

Teen Lottie is not looking good. Again, I emphasise just how goated Misty is because jezus Shauna did a number on her.

Misty is literally helping Lottie pee blood right now and I want to give Mari credit for helping but also fuck Mari again for being a bratty douche.

Thank god somebody finally called her ass out for being a dick. And the fact that it was Misty is just chef's kiss.

Oh great, she dropped Lottie's bloodpiss everywhere. Mari is a whole pretty little liars character and she would not survive a zombie apocalypse, regardless of the fact that the x-ray keeps implying that she does by crediting her as teen Mari.

Thank god for captions because I thought Akilah said she's gonna have nugget eat her baby nephew without them.

Nugget being dead all along fucked me up.

You mean to tell me Akilah kneeled down between Shauna's legs as she was giving birth, and touched a dead rat before digging around in her guts, and Lottie is the only one pissing blood?

This show keeps getting more and more fucked up

Like that thing was decaying. It was mummified. It was a mummified mouse.

Fuck my life.

I didn't even think about the mouse being dead all along. What a plot twist. Hopefully the last big shocker of the season. Boy they really got us there. Oh boy. What an episode.

Van immediately picked up on Shauna lying, not from Shauna herself lying but from Taissa. I just know it.

See? I knew it! She figured it out! That's my girl! That's my baby!

My baby is so bright. So impulsive and bright. She's so fucking jealous that Jeff knows and she doesn't 🤣 this is the first time I've laughed in a while now, thanks Van.

Van is a little instigator and I love her for it.

So Tai used to see her shadow-self in her reflections as a teen too? That's good to know.

So was Javi the one carving all those sign 94 was it the cabin guy?

Mmm belt soup

They're really losing it. It's the belt soup. Things are continuing to happen. I almost feel sorry for fucking Mari right now.

Almost. It's still Mari.

Kevyn wants to fuck Jeff so bad.

I'm starting to like Callie and Jeff.

They probably should have burned the body.

Kevyn continues to want to fuck Jeff. This is the love story we should have been ficcing all along.

This is the funniest conversation. They really fucking owe Misty their lives. Also Van didn't look shocked at all that Misty had her address so my new headcanon is she straight up just stayed in touch with her. And I have so many thoughts right now but key being Taissa totally just used the political research excuse but really just wanted to check in on Van. Like I'm positive she did not just do all that just to make sure no one would talk. There's no way. Everything she's done so far has been leading up to reuniting with Van so there's no way she just hired a fixer to make sure no one would talk.

They really should build that shrine to Misty btw. She's the real fixer.

Nat gave Javi her socks 🥺 he's basically a pet at this point. He doesn't talk and he's just there as moral support.

Lottie and Misty sleeping in the attic together in a non sexy way... Though if you squint there's some chemistry there. I'm sure there's fics of it out there. Misty dabbing Lotties's swollen eyes, Lottie reaching up and pulling her in for a smooch...

"Shauna was seeing seduced by this adorable grifter" they try so hard at that comphet. Shh, it's okay, we know you love Natalie, Misty.

Van's expressions are everything 🤣

Is Shauna's shit going to come up to the surface now? Misty and Taissa have already outed their own pretty little lies, so it's only fair.

I hate that Walter is listening to Barbara Streisand covers of Sweeny Todd while making massive puzzles in a mansion and just generally living my dream life. Fuck you Walter.

At least tell me I have more Reddit upvotes than Walter. Let me have this one fucking thing, at least.

Yup, he immediately went to the cops. I have one thing in him at least; moral integrity.

How the fuck did Shauna get back? This has to be a dream. Van yeeted her keys.

Yup it was a dream.

Shauna sawbladehands 🤣

Jeff is a good dad 🥺

Van is lowkey instigating shit. I mean Tai was the one that said it but Van kind of controls who lives or dies back then. She's the one that decided where the line is. She was the one that put Lottie in power and she's the one that decided they won't let her die. Van is the kingmaker.

We're really gonna talk about Misty silencing the fixer like it's a bad thing though? She's solving problems other people created and they're calling her out for covering all their asses?!

At least Shauna is being honest and opening up. She's not wrong either.

Aaand Lottie is using this as a Segway to talk about the woods and her beliefs and stuff.

Van. The girl who holds the cards. That shot where she is shuffling the cards and you can see the antlers sticking out of her head was NOT a coincidence. Someone else may wear the crown but Van was always the antler queen. That's my theory anyway.

Van was so steadfast but Taissa was coming undone when Van picked her card. She was rocking back and forth and sighing and god the acting is so good.

Nat got the queen of hearts but I have no idea what that means. Is she to be hunted? If that's the case, why would they include their only hunter and their best medics in the lineup of potential prey? That's pretty shortsighted of them.

Also interesting to see the cards they've been using for fun and games and flashing around in the background to determine potential life or death scenarios.

There's no way they're gonna kill Nat. At least not right now. But fuck this is stressful.

Like even though I know she doesn't die and I've seen her as an adult I am still scared shitless.

Also again why the fuck would you include the only hunter in this?

Nat moving towards the knife too is so badass of her.

I hope this isn't one of those things where she's doomed because her card was pulled and now she has to die to right a wrong in the universe. Like final destination.

For once I'm giving Travis credit.

Why didn't they just kill Travis though?

I feel like this but where they're running off into the woods to hunt was in a preview somewhere earlier in the show.

Is Javi doomed? did Travis doom Javi? Is Javi gonna die? Is that why Travis was so fucked up in the future? I can't imagine this ending up well for them.

Lottie is suggesting an orgy

Nevermind, she's suggesting murder. I don't know why I even try with you, Lottie.

Knowing this show Van would get drugged but somehow survive because she's lesbian Jesus or lesbian Rasputin. I'm not sure which one but either way she's lesbian immortal so ye.

"our lives aren't that bad" Shauna, honey, you need to start paying attention.

The Van one was personal. Fuck. Like everyone else was like "Taissa, you pushed your family away and killed your dog. Misty you killed a person. Van, the life has been drained from you. You're a ghost of your former self. I look at you and I feel the inexorable reach of the grave shuddering towards me. There is something deeply wrong with you. You are broken on a fundamental level." 🫢

Ben in the meantime :

Is this where Javi hid out? Tai stopped sleepwalking so it couldn't be her hole Ben just entered so it has to be Javi's hole, right?

Or maybe Jackie is a zombie or a revenant and she's been chilling there.

Javi talked!

Taissa is leading the charge?!

The girls had way more weapons than I thought they did

Oh shit the ice is cracking

Misty just saved Natalie's life! But doomed Javi in the process. Is this why Nat can't stand her? Because Javi died for her? Because she didn't save him either. She can blame Misty all she wants but at the end of the day, Nat didn't save Javi either.

Is this why they hate her? Because she reminds them of what they had to do?

Is this why Van's and Shauna can look comfortably at her while Nat and Taissa shut the door on her? Because of what she represents?

Because Van and Shauna never ran from it while Nat and Tai both tried to bury it?

We say the wilderness chose but it was really Van and Misty. Maybe that's why they hate her too. Because she's stronger.

#yellowjackets #my babies #thoughts #speculation #mine

[nihilityart]

TRAU Incorrect Quotes

(Beastars x Tensura AU)

|Rimuru is the reincarnation of Legoshi who is the reincarnation of Veldanava| |So basically Rimuru, Legoshi, and Veldanava are the same person.|

Lucia: "So your my husbands reincarnation huh?"

Legoshi: "I-I mean that's what they say, but I'm not really sure."

Lucia: "Don't worry I can confirm."

Lucia: *Examines Legoshi's face before pinching his cheeks.*

Lucia(whispering): “……..adorable.”

-Generator-

Velzard, setting down a card: Ace of spades Velgrynd, pulling out an Uno card: +4 Veldora, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you Rimuru, trembling: What are we playing?!

Velzard: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos. Velgrynd: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard. Veldora: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos? Rimuru: Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

Velzard: Can I be frank with you guys? Velgrynd: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help. Veldora: Can I still be Veldora? Rimuru: Shh, let Frank speak.

Gosha: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life Rimuru: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years! Velzard: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this! Velgrynd: I knew I lost that potential somewhere! Veldora: My moral code, is that you? Gosha: Gosha: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk your great-grandmother left me but do you kids need a hug?

Gosha: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one! Rimuru: Tubular AF! Veldora: Mood to the max! Velgrynd, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it. Velzard, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

Gosha: Favorite horror movie? Veldora: It Velzard: Saw Velgrynd: Annabelle Rimuru: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

Rimuru : *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB? Velzard: Bold of you to assume I was born at all. Velgrynd: I personally was created in a lab. Veldora: I just straight up spawned lol.

Rimuru(Having PTSD from being sent to the end of time and space) : There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet. Velzard: Velgrynd: Veldora: Everyone Else At Rimuru ’s Surprise Birthday Party: Velzard: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker* Rimuru : So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Everyone: Jack: ...I did. I broke it. Rimuru : No. No you didn't. Velgrynd? Veldora: Don't look at me. Look at Velgrynd. Velgrynd: What?! I didn't break it. Veldora: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken? Veldgrynd: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken. Veldora: Suspicious. Veldgrynd: No, it's not! Velzard: If it matters, probably not, but Louis was the last one to use it. Louis: Liar! I don't even drink that crap! Velzard: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier? Louis: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Velzard! Jack: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Legoshi . Rimuru : No! Who broke it!? Everyone: Velzard: Rimuru ... Velgrynd's been awfully quiet. Velgrynd: rEALLY?! *Everyone starts arguing* Rimuru , being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. Rimuru : I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Rimuru : Rimuru : Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Ivarage : Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world! Velzard: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment. Velgrynd: More or less, I guess... Veldora: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that! Velgaia: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept. Rimuru: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!

Rimuru : Just be yourself sis. Velzard: 'Be myself'? Rimuru , I have one day to win Guy over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me? Velgrynd: Couple weeks. Velgaia: Six months. Veldora: Jury’s still out. Velzard: See, Rimuru ? Velzard: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’* Rimuru : Thanks fam! Velzard: oh no Veldora: *cries* I love you too Velgrynd: Sounds fake but okay Jack: *A flustered mess* Louis: can I get a refund

Rimuru : Dumbest scar stories, go! Velzard: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. Velgrynd: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it. Jack: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Veldora: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn. Louis: Louis: I have emotional scars.

-Perchance-

Velzard: Good morning. Rimuru: Good morning. Velgrynd: Good morning. Gosha: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Veldora: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

Gosha: Veldora's refusing to wear their glasses! Veldora: Gramps, look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch. Veldora: *points to Rimuru* Rimuru. Veldora: *points to Velgrynd* Velgrynd. Veldora: *points to Velzard* Sasquatch.

Velgrynd: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to? Velzard: Schrödinger's boys. Veldora: FUCK! Rimuru: What about cracking open a cold milkshake? Velgaia: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. Velgaia: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison. Velgrynd: ... Velzard: ... Veldora: ... Rimuru: ... Velgaia: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

Rimuru, holding an antique bottle: Raphael-san, is this whiskey or perfume? Raphael: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle* Raphael: Raphael: |Answer: It's perfume.|

Raphael: And what do I get out of this? Rimuru: I will give you a head pat. Raphael: |Question: What do you think I am? A chump? I would never do it for a head-pat!| Rimuru: How bout two head-pats? Raphael: |Notice: You got yourself a deal.|

Raphael: |Request: Tell them to go eat shit, master.| Rimuru: Tell them yourself. Raphael: |Suggestion to individual: Eat shit, asshole. Fall off your horse.|

Rimuru: The first time Raphael-san opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside they yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"

Rimuru walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Raphael-san, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK. Raphael, sipping coffee happily: |Answer: I love you too, Master :) |

Rimuru: Raphael-san, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life? Raphael: |Answer: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.|

#rimuru tempest #tensura crossover #tensura au incorrect quotes #TRAU #beastars crossover

[crossroadsserpent]

Not fair

Dano!Riddler x GN! Reader.

Summary: the reader proposes to Edward before Edward gets to propose to them. Edward gets all flustered but is upset that reader didn't let him propose so they agree that he can also propose :)

(A/n: I know this is really silly but I thought it was cute so I wrote it! Also! Just a reminder that my requests are open! I'll make a masterlist soon)

♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~

You and Edward were sat on the couch watching your favorite Disney movie, the shared popcorn bowl sat on your lap, Ed's arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer to him. You let out a soft giggle as your favorite scene came on, you loved this scene a lot, you couldn't explain why but it made you so happy. Eddie loved that it made you happy, he wondered if any moments in your relationship made you happy like that scene did.

To your dismay, the scene ended, causing you to settle back down for the remainder of the movie.

It was pretty late when the movie ended, Eddie got up first and took the popcorn bowl to the kitchen. As soon as he was out of sight you quickly ran to your room to pull something out of a hiding spot

Now is a good time, I just hope he doesn't get mad.

You thought to yourself as you closed the hidden drawer in your desk before making your way back into the living room where Edward was waiting for you on the couch. He gave you a sweet smile "Hey Baby! Whered you go? I came back and you were gone..."

You plopped down beside him on the couch "I had to pee." You chuckled softly "but I'm here now and um... I've got a question for you."

Edward nodded, focusing his full attention on you, which honestly made you more nervous. You fidgeted with your hands as you tried to think of the best way to ask him. "U-Um..."

Edward gently caressed your cheek "hey, it's okay, you can ask me anything."

You were still shaking with nerves, what if he said no? Sure he was obsessed with you and would quite literally kill someone for you if you told him to, but what if he didn't want to move further? What if he was happy just being your boyfriend?

You gathered all of your courage, running your thumb over the smooth leather of the ring box hidden in your hands

Now or never Y/N.

You took a deep breath before beginning to speak "Well... um... I've been thinking for a while now.. a-about us I mean, and I-"

"You're breaking up with me?" Ed cut you off, his voice sounding like a mix between a puppy that had just been kicked and a child who lost his favorite toy, tears were already welled up in his eyes.

You quickly pulled him into a tight hug "No! God, no Eddie! Q-Quite the opposite actually..." you pulled back enough to show him the ring box that held a plain silver band. You knew he didn't like to stand out so you didn't get anything flashy. Edward's eyes went wide and his jaw dripped, cheeks turning a nice shade of red. The sight made you chuckle softly "I was going to ask if you'd marry me, sorry I scared you, I should have worded it differently."

It took a few seconds for the shock to wear off but when it did Ed's arms were wrapped around your waist tightly, his face buried into your shoulder.

"No fair Y/n, I was supposed to propose to you" he whined softly, holding you closer to him. "Who says it has to just be one person that proposes?" You gently rub his back, feeling him smile against your shoulder. "You're right... so that means I get to propose to you later?" He looks up at you, his cheeks still burning red.

"Yes it does." You smile, placing a kiss on his forehead. He let out an excited giggle "okay, good." He pulls you into a long, passionate kiss, pulling away after a minute with a huge grin on his face "Yes, Yes Y/N, I will marry you."

(A/n: sorry if this was bad!)

#edward nashton #the batman #edward nashton x reader #paul dano x reader #riddler 2022 #the batman riddler

[writingismylove]

wait for me (part two)

Cody goes on a date with a cute waitress from 79s. He isn't sure what to think of it, but his men certainly have opinions.

A/N: I felt like writing a part two, so here it is! Hope you guys like it. Enjoy!

Rating: T

Warnings: mentions of sex but nothing nsfw

Link to part one

Cody tapped his fingers against his glass as he sat at the bar. It was almost eight, nearly time for his date with Macari. It wasn't exactly his first date, but it was the first one he'd been on where the goal wasn't a one night stand.

Not that sex was all he looked for in a relationship. It really wasn't. He just didn't have time for dating or romance. And besides, it wouldn't be fair to any man or woman he went out with.

He was a marshal commander and led one the busiest battalions in the army. He didn't have time to devote to a partner.

And romance was not his thing.

"Hey there, cutie."

Cody jumped and turned to see Macari giggling on the stool next to him. "Hello there. Sorry I didn't notice you."

She smiled. "It's okay. You were brooding. Still on for our date?"

"I was not brooding, but yes."

"Sure, and that's not a big, brooding frown on your face. Would you like to go get something to eat."

"I am not frowning. That sounds lovely." Cody stood and awkwardly offered her his arm. "Did you have a place in mind?"

Macari hopped off her stool and placed her hand on his arm. "I did actually. It isn't far. Just a few blocks down the street."

"I look forward to it, miss."

"You don't have to call me miss," she giggled as they navigated their way through the crowd. "I have a name. You can use it."

"Yes ma'am- I mean, Macari." Cody silently cursed at the heat rising in his face. He was not used to being unbalanced like this.

A flash of yellow in the corner of his eye made him groan. He did not need his men seeing him with a woman, but he was too unlucky for that.

"Hey Commander!" Boil waved at him, grinning widely. "Good luck on the date!"

"Yeah, make sure to mind your manners with the lady!" Waxer smirked as Cody shot him a sharp glare. "Good luck, sir!"

Macari waved at them and laughed as Cody held open the door for her. "Aren't they sweet?"

"No. They are menaces."

"Aw, you aren't being fair. They're sweet. Just down here. Do you like tacos?"

Cody nodded, careful to keep his steps slow and even. It wasn't polite to rush a lady. "I do. Is that what we're eating?"

"They're my favorite meal after a long shift. So what made you ask me out, Commander Cutie?"

The heat was in his cheeks now, burning his face from the inside out. "You looked pretty, and it's been a while since I've been on a date. I thought I would take the chance while I'm on leave."

She smiled up at him and tugged him to a line beside a taco cart. "Well I'm glad you did. It's been so long since I've been on a nice date. Men aren't always as nice as you."

"Um right. So how long have you worked at 79s?"

"Since it opened. My last place closed, and they needed workers. The pay is good, and I get to chat with the finest the Republic has to offer all the time."

"But my battalion isn't on Coruscant all that often," Cody said, smiling as the joke made her eyes sparkle with laughter. "You don't us all the time."

"That is true. I don't get to see a cutie like you all the time. It's a shame. You would really make work a little more exciting."

"You'd make all the paperwork more appealing for sure."

Macari smiled but didn't answer as she stepped up to order. Cody ordered after her and raised his eyebrows at the steaming hot taco box that was handed to him a few minutes later.

"This is huge," he said incredulously. "They really fill up these boxes."

"Oh yeah, this place gives you a lot. Come on, we can sit over here." She led him over to a picnic table and sat down. "Mm, delicious. What do you think?"

Cody took a bite and groaned at the taste. "These are the best tacos I've ever eaten."

"I told you! Now why don't you tell me about your favorite planet that you've been to? I've lived here all my life, and I would love to learn about the galaxy."

"What do you know about Naboo?"

Dates weren't so bad, Cody decided as the night went on. Perhaps romance wasn't so far off his track as he thought.

*

"Hey, look who's back!"

Cody sighed as he walked back into the barracks. "Shut up, Boil."

"How was your date with the hottest waitress in the place?"

"It was nice."

"Nice he says," Boil scoffed. "Come on, you got to have more to say than that. Did you go back to her place? Get any action?"

"No. Why do you care?"

"Because we wanna know," Waxer called as he tossed popcorn into his mouth. "And she's hot. What did you get up to?"

"We just went for dinner, talked, and I walked her back to her apartment. That's all."

"Aw. You going back out with her?"

"I might." He was in fact going out with Macari again the next day, but his nosey men didn't need to know that. "Is it really your business?"

"Obviously. You're our commander. We have to know all the details about your dating life."

Cody rolled his eyes. "Go bother someone else."

"Fine, fine. So have you guys heard those rumors about Commander Bly and his Jedi?"

He sighed but stuck around to listen. After all, it would be quite the mistake to pass up on a chance to tease his brither later.

#tcw #tcw fanfic #star wars #the clone wars #commander cody #commander cody x oc #212th battalion

[casspurrjoybellbittner]

Wreckless - Floating Embers

*Warning Adult Content*

Finnegan

Five hours later the sun has risen and the fire is contained enough to take stock of the damage even from the barricade I'm behind.

It's not a total loss, at least not to my untrained eye.

The warehouse seems to have the most damage but half of the production floor is gone too.

Both may need to be completely rebuilt due to water damage.

The offices, somehow, don't look too bad.

I have no idea if the sprinklers went off or not and of course the fire department soaked the entire area but maybe that wing is salvageable.

I speak with the EMT's and fire chief and as far as they know, no one was in the building.

No firefighters have been hurt, either.

Apparently the security guard called it in and he was the only one around.

Good... Buildings can be rebuilt, people can't be.

I flag down the fire inspector but he refuses to give me any information, just takes my business card.

It's fair, he doesn't know much more than I do yet.

The biggest question is how it started.

If it's due to our negligence, insurance will be a nightmare.

Either way, what's next?

I call my father and the department heads and tell them the little I know.

All hourly employees and low-tiered salaried employees will get today and tomorrow off with pay.

I need to have Megan rent space in a hotel nearby so that we can start strategizing tomorrow.

I need some sleep... I need Emmett.

I feel bad showing up at his door but luckily he hasn't left for work.

"Hey darling, come in."

"I should have gone home, I'm sorry, I just... your place is closer."

"It is and I'm here so there's that. How is it?"

I repeat what I told my father earlier... I'm on autopilot. 

"It's a disaster. Parts of the warehouse are still burning."

"I'm so sorry, darling," he says, pulling me into his arms.

He feels amazing but now that I'm not surrounded by it... all I can smell is rancid smoke.

"I stink."

"I'm going to a garage, not to church. Can you get some sleep or do you have a full day?"

"I need a few hours, I have to."

I'm going to be no good to anyone if I don't. 

I'm not lucky enough to be one of those people who can survive and sometimes even thrive on five or six hours of sleep and last night I got much less than that.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No, no, go to work. Can I sleep here?" 

The thought of getting back into my car and going to my apartment is too much to handle right now.

"Of course you can. There's a spare key in the wooden box on my dresser. Lock the door behind me and call me if you need me. There's yogurt and cereal, make sure you eat. Stay as long as you want and come back whenever you can."

He's too good to me, really.

"Okay, thank you. Really. Go, don't be late, I'm fine."

He kisses my dirty, stubbly cheek.

"Be safe," and then he's gone.

It's odd being in the house without him.

I've become fairly comfortable here over the past few weeks but everything shifts when he walks out the door.

I'm fine but it's strange.

I head upstairs to get out of these dirty clothes.

Thankfully he has a working washer, at least.

I decide to wash mine before the smell permeates through the entire house and take them down.

Back upstairs I go, intent on finding the key so that I don't forget it later.

I've seen the box he mentioned... I know which one he means.

I open it and it's obviously a treasure box of sorts.

There's a picture on top... him and his mother when he's maybe fourteen.

He's gangly and boy but definitely on the cusp.

A letter written in a woman's flowing cursive.

Probably from her too.

A photo of him and some army buddies in BDUs.

They have helmets on and rifles against their chests and are seated in the back of a truck in a desert, somewhere.

Some army medals and pins and his dog tags.

Random coins, not American.

An old car key and what I'm pretty sure is the spare house key.

I put it onto my key ring and feel guilty for snooping even though I didn't any more than necessary and he gave me permission to look inside.

I can't get into bed with my hair smelling like this so I take a quick shower and then climb in.

It feels good to snuggle into familiar blankets and pillows, ones I share with Emmett.

I'm asleep before I can even make a mental list of things to do later today.

I wake up groggy and thirsty.... I brush my teeth, get some water, have some yogurt and call my father.

"Finn, I've talked to the board of directors and the fire inspector. I've given it some thought and I think you may as well come on home. There's no reason to rebuild in Baltimore and we won't be able to until the arson report and insurance payments come through. You've been gone awhile, I'm sure you'd like to get back home. We'll do right by the employees, if there's anyone you really think is an asset we'll see about a transfer."

I can't think. I haven't gotten much past 'come on home'.

Do I love Baltimore? No.

Do I love Emmett? Maybe.

I will miss him horribly, that's not up for debate.

We were supposed to have more time.

"I don't think it's a total loss. We already have the site and employees, shouldn't we wait for the fire inspector's report before we give up?"

I honestly don't know what else to say.

"Finnegan, I think you should come home at least for awhile. Your mother is worried sick and you need a break. You've got this afternoon and tomorrow, wrap up some lose ends and come home. Make sure there's a security detail posted and the site gets fenced off. If someone needs to fly out in a few weeks to assess the damage, see what we can salvage and put it on the market, we'll make it happen. Keep me posted and make sure you're taking care of yourself, son. See you soon."

He hangs up and the silence is deafening.

I wander into Emmett's spare room to check on Marten.

I just need something tangible right now, something real.

He's sleeping in his little hammock so I just sit next to the cage and try to think.

My cell-phone rings, it's Megan.

"Hello."

"You sound exhausted and I know you're busy, sorry to bother you Mr. Walker."

"I've got a conference room booked and I booked a room in the hotel as well, we got a huge discount and I thought it might come in handy. I emailed you all the information. If you tell me what time you'd like everyone there I can do an email blast to management."

"Nine a.m. Thank you. Bring in the top three we have left in accounting."

Not having a department head is going to make things much more difficult.

"I need whichever of our lawyers handle tax and insurance as well."

"Will do. Also, I canceled everything for the rest of the week except your Dept of Defence appointment... I just want to confirm whether you want that canceled or rescheduled."

Shit, I've been waiting on this appointment for so long that I forgot all about it.

It's been 'coming soon' for so long that it's become a non-entity.

The Department of Defense appointment is tricky because I'm sort of going behind my father's back.

They contacted us about a year ago asking us to bid on a job for circuit boards but my dad turned them down cold.

He refuses to help the military. I'm a bit more pragmatic.

Department of Defense contracts are lucrative... Very lucrative.

They rarely go belly-up even when the economy does.

They're flexible, we can bid on those that we can easily accommodate and only when we have the time and manpower.

I see no downsides... That's not true, there's one huge downside... the appointment is tomorrow and I'm supposed to be working with my team to shut everything down.

No, I'm not doing it... I'm not leaving Emmett and I'm not giving up.... Not yet.

"Don't cancel, I'll be there. What time is it again?"

"5:00 p.m. They say to arrive fifteen minutes early to clear security."

Right, I remember thinking it was going to be a long day and being surprised that the Department of Defense didn't close up shop earlier than that.

"Send me the info."

I should head back to the site now and see what I can find out.

I need to know how bad it is and when we can get on the site and into the offices to assess the damage.

I also need to get the whole area fenced off... the last thing we need is people squatting, vandalizing or robbing the place.

[theghostpinesmusic]

Three Sisters and Broken Top Circumnavigation (2/5)

I'm generally pretty resilient when it comes to cold temperatures, but my night at Golden Lake was cold. My thermometer read twenty-five degrees when I crawled out of the tent the next morning, but even though I've spent multiple nights out at fifteen and even ten degrees before, on this particular night the cold had really seeped into my bones.

With over twelve hours of darkness to burn, I woke up feeling like I'd slept "enough," but I'd spent a fair amount of that twelve hours awake and shifting around in my sleeping bag, trying to keep my hands covered, my feet warm, and my core solidly on top of my sleeping pad. Whenever I'd failed to do any of those things, I woke up shortly thereafter shivering and with frozen extremities. In the morning, the inside of the tent was coated with condensation: this was the first time I'd ever had a problem with it in seven years' worth of trips using my Big Agnes Copper Spur (product placement!). The outside of the tent was sheathed in ice that needed to be cracked off before I could pack it up. Needless to say, it took me a little longer than usual to get moving.

I managed to motivate myself to get up and make breakfast before the sun had fully risen above the hills to the east, but rather than breaking camp down while the food cooked like I typically do, I just sat inside the tent, inside my sleeping bag, and tried to stay warm.

In packing for this trip, I'd brought gear (namely, clothes and a sleeping bag) that was meant to sort of straddle the difference between summer and shoulder backpacking seasons, gear that was almost as light as my summer kit, but a little bit warmer and heavier. I'd done this instead of bringing my straight-up winter gear, which is much heavier but also much warmer.

I wondered, as I ate my oatmeal and felt like it was melting the ice that seemed to have formed overnight inside my body, if this had been a mistake. I'd gotten through the night okay, and I certainly didn't feel like my health or life was in danger from the cold, but it had been really uncomfortable, and while I could handle three more nights of camping at twenty-five degrees, I wasn't sure that I wanted to.

I took a quick walk around the lake, both to ponder this and to warm myself up a bit more before I packed up my gear. As I did, I watched the sunlight line move at what seemed to me to be an agonizingly slow rate down the mountains, into the basin, and, eventually, to me and my tent.

As cold as it had been all night, it was still only early October, and as soon as the sun hit the basin, me and the dirt both thawed out. I packed up my tent as carefully as I could, keeping the dry(ish) tent body separate from the absolutely soaked tent fly. I hoped that I'd have time to air- and/or sun-dry the fly later that afternoon, but for the time being I stuffed it into my pack's external pocket, letting it dry and drain as much as possible while I was on the move.

I started the day's hike by backtracking my way back to the Green Lakes Trail and then heading east. Next was a bit more retrograde travel over familiar ground until I got to a second intersection and then turned north. Almost immediately after reaching this second intersection, my first water break of the day along the East Fork Park Creek was interrupted by the shouting, screaming, and stomping of a thirteen-teenager troupe of backpackers led by one somewhat bemused and exhausted-seeming adult. I'd already gotten caught up with a similar group earlier in the summer when hiking up Canyon Creek, and then again when hiking around Three-Fingered Jack...apparently this was the year for sharing the trail with too-large groups of hiking children.

They were nice enough (if loud, disrupting the otherwise still and empty October trails), and I found out from chatting with the lone leading adult that they were heading my way that afternoon, but that they were shooting for Camp Lake to stay for the night, which would take them out of my way once I was a little over halfway to South Matthieu Lake. I let them get a good start ahead of me, as I know I tend to hike slower than others but take fewer breaks to balance things out, and I expected to see them again later in the day. It took awhile, but eventually their shouting and screaming voices faded away into the distance ahead of me.

This was the first and potentially only "new" section of trail I would hike during my entire circumnavigation. The "usual" route for the Three Sisters Loop included this portion of trail, technically: assuming you were coming up and around the Sisters from Green Lakes to the south, you would just stay on the Green Lakes Trail for many miles, bypassing the Camp Lake Trail and eventually dead-ending into the Scott Pass Trail just south of South Matthieu Lake. When Lindsey and I did the loop, however, I had gotten a crazy notion in my head while making breakfast at Green Lakes and we'd decided to go off-trail almost immediately and spend the day scrambling almost due north up and along the eastern shoulder of South Sister until we got to the Chambers Lakes and, eventually, Camp Lake, where we spent our second night. The next morning, we took the Camp Lake Trail back to the Green Lakes Trail and proceeded northward from there, having some wild off-trail adventures but simultaneously skipping Golden Lake and the section of trail just north of it that I was on now.

For the most part, post-Golden-Lake, this trail wasn't really a revelation. It stayed high above a number of valleys, but also stayed a burn area for most of the morning and afternoon.

At one point, near a small, unnamed lake, I caught up to and passed the large hiking party as they were taking a break. This was about two miles after they had originally passed me. We chatted amiably again for a few minutes, and then I passed on. I would end up staying ahead of them for the rest of the way to the Camp Lake turnoff.

In a few places along this section, the deadfall was so thick that it became hard to follow the trail, even though the landscape was relatively open, view-wise. The only truly difficult section (and the second-to-last time I would consider simply turning around and going home on the trip) was the descent into a valley just south of the South Fork Whycus Creek: here, the trail was so steep and simultaneously so washed-out and buried under deadfall that I eventually found myself a few hundred feet downhill from the trail, unable to fight through creekside vegetation any longer and also unable to climb back up to the trail through detritus with a heavy backpack on.

It was a slog, but eventually I picked my way back up the hill by traversing to the east and caught the trail about thirty minutes after I'd first lost it. My reward (as I chose to think of it) was to follow the trail proper down to a crossing of the South Fork Whycus Creek that was the closest thing to "live forest" that I'd seen since leaving Park Meadows earlier that morning. It wasn't much, but sometimes when hiking around in the Three Sisters Wilderness, you have to take what little signs of life you can find.

As I climbed back out of the valley, I kept an eye turned south to make sure the large party behind me navigated the descent successfully, and, eventually, they did (with much less trouble than I had done, to be honest). This would be the last time I saw or heard them.

At the Camp Lake turnoff, I stopped briefly to talk to a couple who were dayhiking and planned on finding a scramble route up to and across the Hayden Glacier (on the east side of Middle Sister). I'm familiar with this glacier and based on their gear and knowledge of the area, this plan seemed mildly insane to me, but I kept this to myself. I wished them luck and kept on.

The rest of the hike due north was uneventful, and before long I had passed the Pole Creek turnoff and started bearing west a bit through still more burnt forest.

As I wrote at the beginning of this trip report, I do find burn areas, especially those in the Sisters Wilderness, to have their own kind of beauty. I will also say, though, that after hiking for most of two entire days through burn, it started to wear on me. According to GaiaGPS, I hiked eighteen miles on the second day, and thirteen of those miles were through burned forest. It can be a lot. Especially when you also have an active fire to contend with.

So, the previous morning, when I'd been driving between the city of Sisters and the trailhead, I'd passed a smoldering prescribed burn. These are pretty typical in Oregon and the west in general in the fall: essentially (for those who don't know), these are fires started on purpose and then limited in scope, intended to burn out small areas that are likely to otherwise burn out of control during a future summer and maybe grow into full-fledged wildfires. A little is burnt now on purpose so that more doesn't burn later not on purpose.

Of course, the downside to this is that wildfire season in Oregon is, these days, basically followed by a second fire season during which you can be inundated at any point by smoke from fires that are intentionally set rather than accidentally started. Knowing this ahead of time, I had checked the night before leaving home to make sure there were no prescribed burns in the Sisters area, and there weren't. But, as my Watch Duty app would tell me the next time I hiked into a pocket of reception, this prescribed burn had been started on October 3rd (the morning I arrived at the trailhead) and would burn until October 8th (the day I planned to finish the hike). For me personally, the timing couldn't have been worse.

When I drove past the fire on the first day, it had been small and blowing smoke to the north. By the second afternoon, as I passed the Pole Creek trail and started to climb the outside edge of North Sister's shoulder, the fire had grown to a few thousand acres and the wind was inexorably shifting in my direction. A curtain of smoke hung behind the hills to my right most of the day, slowly but surely moving closer and closer to me as the hours passed.

At the same time, I passed into the heart of the burn area, where the 2012 Pole Creek burn and the 2017 Mill Creek burn overlap. It looked like Mordor.

I'd been through here in 2018 with Lindsey, only a year after the Mill Creek fire, and it had been worse, so I knew what to expect. But the unexpected pall of smoke combined with the devastation cratered my morale.

I'm going to go on one more diversion here before finishing this part of the report, because it's worth trying to explain the feeling I had at this moment, for anyone reading who recognizes it and also for anyone reading who doesn't. There is a certain claustrophobia to living in the west these days, a claustrophobia that I experience as a sort of constant background noise in my brain from early June until early November or so every year.

This claustrophobia is caused by the knowledge that, at any moment during nearly half the year, you can go from enjoying a beautiful, blue-skied day to choking on smoke that makes it impossible to be outside or to even have your windows open. We've had days where it's possible to look directly at the sun without hurting your eyes because the smoke is so thick. We've had days where you can't see the sun at all. One summer, we couldn't see from our house across the border to fourteen-thousand foot Mt. Shasta for forty-two straight days. On the forty-third morning, when I woke up and could see the mountain out the front window, I immediately started crying.

I, personally, have been lucky so far. I know people who have lost houses, family members, their entire towns, in wildfires. I know one person whose house in California burnt down one year, so they moved to Oregon and bought another house. The next summer, that house burnt down in another fire. I am extremely lucky that, generally speaking, the main effect wildfire season has on me is that sometimes I have to cancel hiking trips and run on a treadmill in my basement instead of being outside in the sun. I tell myself I live in a relatively protected part of a big city, and that my house isn't in particular danger, but maybe that will be proven wrong. And if it is, it will likely happen quickly, without warning, and most everything I've gathered and collected over the last twenty-five years of my adult life will burn. We'll see, I guess. It's certainly not going to stop getting hotter and drier in my lifetime.

For now, though, even within my own relative fortune, smoke and fire have become triggers for a sort of violent claustrophobia, a form of existential angst. Every summer is spent watching the map of my access to cities, trails, and wilderness areas around me methodically shrink as active fires and bad air quality make place after place unvisitable, like an enemy army conquering what was once free territory. By August, I'm lucky if I step out my front door and breathe easily or if there's more than one or two places I can travel for a hike within a six hour drive without having to camp out in an ashfall. Having both be possible at the same time has only happened a few times in the last ten years. I deal with this by making dark jokes, as many people I know do, but when I think of trying to explain this state of affairs to a time traveler from, say, the 1990s, it's hard to imagine them understanding it as anything besides relentlessly apocalyptic.

So, when the smoke turned my way en route to South Matthieu Lake as I passed through the ruins of what used to be a beautiful pine forest, an entire ecosystem erased not once, but twice in five years, I didn't experience it as in isolated event. I experienced it as an extension of all those previous summers. I remembered waking up along Dick's Lake in Tahoe last summer, a wondrous view of granite slabs lit by the morning sun erased by a pall of brown smoke that made the lake nearly invisible from fifty feet away, the sun a weak orange trickle in the sky that I could look directly at without squinting as I brushed piles of ash off the roof of the tent and tried not to cough so loud that I woke Lindsey up. This trip to Sisters had been meant, in a sense, to be a "make-up" for that trip, and for all the other trips I hadn't taken in the previous years because of smoke and fire. And here they were, just as I was reaching the point in the loop where it had stopped making sense to turn around and go back if the air quality crashed suddenly. If this pall settled over the Sisters Wilderness, I would just have to hike for three more days under it, and make the best of what I had. I didn't know if I had it in me.

Then the smoke did settle over the trail, blocking out the sun, making it hard to breathe, and filling my nose with the smell of burning trees, and I knew I didn't have it in me.

Knowing that this fire was an intentional, prescribed burn, and not a chaotic, destructive one helped in an academic sense, but not an emotional one. In a daze, I passed a couple riding horses downhill from the lake. They were despondent about the smoke, telling me an all-too-familiar story about how they'd waited until October to take this trip because they'd hoped it would finally be "safe." The woman seemed on the verge of tears. We commiserated for a few minutes, and then I kept walking uphill because I wasn't quite sure what else to do.

Since I'd left the trailhead, I'd been looking forward to this moment just south of South Matthieu Lake where you finally reach the top of Scott Pass. It's a gradual but long climb, and for Lindsey and I in 2018, doing this loop for the first time, reaching it had been a huge accomplishment at the end of a very difficult but meaningful day. I still remembered that moment with picture-perfect clarity, and had been excited to be there again, not just because of the wonderful views, but also because it would be a major milestone along this long, solo trip I'd concocted for myself.

Topping off under the pall of smoke, the lake barely visible and North Sister behind it just a half-outline, the moment felt ruined. Tired and sad, I picked a camp spot, barely registering that the usually-busy area was completely empty and I had my choice of spots. I set up my tent, strung up the fly to dry in the waning sunlight and whipping wind, and just sort of wallowed for awhile.

After a bit, I came to again, and realizing that I might feel better if I had something to do, I took a short, pack-less hike downhill to North Matthieu Lake. The two lakes are separated by a half-mile-or-so of trail, but South is on the bigger loop route, while North is not. Lindsey and I had wondered what North was like when we'd hiked through here before, but had been too exhausted to check it out once we'd reached camp.

As I walked downhill and into the actually-green forest, the smoke abated a little (or at least wasn't as obvious). North Matthieu was a neat little lake, as it turned out, ringed by lots of nice campsites. There were tons of mountain goat tracks in the mud around the lake, causing me to wander the circumference for a bit in hopes of having a repeat of my goat experience in the Strawberry Mountain Wilderness, but I didn't have any luck.

In the end, though North Matthieu would be a great place to sleep on pretty much any backpacking trip, I decided not to move my camp, as South Matthieu is (in my humble opinion) "objectively" even better. So, I hoofed it back up the hill for what I assumed would be my last half-mile of a very long day.

Despite ultimately, uncomplicatedly loving my experiences in wilderness, I spend a lot of time in these trip reports either indirectly or directly reflecting on the ways in which backpacking trips can quickly and unexpectedly take a negative turn. The reality, of course, is that the opposite happens just as often: something wonderful and seemingly serendipitous can suddenly come out of a bad situation.

As I neared the point where the trail topped out again back at South Matthieu, just north of my campsite, I noticed, almost subconsciously, that I couldn't smell the smoke as strongly as I once could. But it wasn't until I topped off at the pass proper that I could see it: the heavy wind had shifted again, and the smoke had blown out as quickly as it had blown in a few hours earlier. North Sister glowed in the distance through a nearly-clear sky and I stared at it with my jaw hanging open.

Heart hammering with excitement, I grabbed a trekking pole from camp and headed uphill to the northeast for yet another short hike.

"Behind" South Matthieu Lake, there's a small volcanic hill that Lindsey and I "discovered" when we camped there in 2018. We climbed up there despite a hard and chill wind to watch the sunset behind the wall of the central Oregon Cascades, and it's one of my favorite memories. I'd been so despondent upon reaching camp this time that I'd decided not to watch the sunset from there as I was sure it would just make me feel worse: with clear skies, now, though, I didn't want to miss it!

I had to sort of walk-run through the deep volcanic scree up the slope (note: this is not easy, as it turns out), but I made it just in time to watch the sun disappear behind the mountains.

I was cold and a little lonely up on the hill by myself, but it was wonderful.

I climbed back down the hill shortly after the sun completely disappeared (mostly because the temperature absolutely plummeted at that point), quickly cooked and ate dinner, and disappeared into my tent for the night.

Almost immediately, I could tell that this night was going to be warmer than last night, despite the fact that I was at a higher elevation. That boded well for my staying warm on the rest of the trip, where I'd be camping almost a thousand feet below the elevation I was currently at. The sky was clear, the stars were out, my sleeping bag and tent had mostly dried, and I had a shorter (downill!) walk ahead of me tomorrow. The wind would continue to howl across the pass, smacking and tearing at the tent for most of the night, but it was the wind that was driving the smoke away from me and keeping the sky clear. When it blew extra-hard, waking me up in the middle of the night a few times, rather than being annoyed I had an irrational urge to say "Thank you." I may have actually done it once or twice.

I had made it to the northern tip of North Sister. Tomorrow I would jump on the PCT and head south, with the mountains now on my left. I knew from previous experience that I would pass through some awesome lava fields, get some absolutely eye-melting views of North and Middle Sisters, pass through the famous (and famously weird) Obsidian Area, and end up...somewhere where there was water, hopefully?

But that last thing was a problem for tomorrow.

#hiking #backpacking #traveling #camping #broken top #three sisters #south sister #north sister #middle sister #photos #writing #mountains #central oregon

[somerandomgrl]

I was showering and I remembered a lot of things my mom has said to me in the past.

I'll list them so I can finally forget them, and there's no specific order cuz I have no concept of time, therefore I can't remember when any of them happened.

1 - I told her she wasn't being fair cuz I wanted more freedom, she told me that life wasn't fair. I was stuck taking care of my newborn nephew and my older sister.

2 - She started suspecting I was a lesbian (which I'm not but I'm still part of the LGBT community), and she offered to take me to get snacks and drive us to some parking lot to lecture me about it, saying homosexuals were sick people, that she understood but it wasn't natural.

3 - She told me that I had no right to be sad or angry because she and my dad gave us everything to my sister and me, which is not true, the amount of times I didn't eat or had to live off sandwich at that time because bread and ham was everything I could afford... I was 16 and plain ham sandwiches are still one of my favorite foods.

4 - My sister has no sense of responsibility, so having a baby was pretty difficult for both of us since my mom was always traveling and my dad moved to another city. I complained about my sister being awfully irresponsible with her kid, and how I always ended up taking care of him even if I was burning in fever (which was worrying to me since he was a baby) and she, my mom, told me that I had to be more understanding and change because my sister would never do it. Today I don't live near my baby, I have a niece with developing issues that my nephew doesn't have and they still refuse to acknowledge how big of a job I did raising my baby boy. Still both of them are everything to me and the reason I'm still here, even if no one knows that.

5 - I failed in school more times than anyone should in their life, and my mom was a top student... Even if I got points over a perfect score she would tell me I could have done it better. Not only that she made sure to tell me once that her love wasn't unconditional, that I have to work harder.

6 - She says she supports me as a part of the LGBTQ community, but the moment I say something about it she looks annoyed and awkward, I can't talk to her about literally anything unless we're outside and she wants to look like a good mom, or unless it's some gossip. She sees us as entertainment, that until my homophobic dad and/or sister are here, then she sides with them saying it's not natural and kids shouldn't have two moms or two dads because that'd confuse them. Guys... Out there people actually have same sex relationships and kids have same sex parents, I think it would be even more confusing to them if they hide reality.

7 - When I told her I was probably autistic, hence neurodivergent, she told me that it was okay and she understood, that she thought I was a very high functioning autistic person and that it was fine because she knew how to deal with me already. She's never done that at all, every time I had to adapt to them and if I couldn't she would call me rebellious, even though I was never really problematic. Two days ago I told her I had social anxiety, not only I've had it my whole life, it got worse after a lot of times I've been harassed and almost abused, and she asked God to give her more patience because she was tired of people from my generation being so "weak" and having so many mental issues.

8 - She said once that she couldn't trust me because I didn't get the time to clean the house for her party because I had to run some errands for said party...

9 - Yet she made me walk an hour in a new city to give her her phone she forgot at home. She always had a car and she wouldn't have made more than 20 minutes. That same thing happened with her laptop.

10 - As I said before, I'm not a good student and I have never been. This means I got caught often skipping classes or forgetting my homework at home. One of those times my parents were actually called and only my dad went to the appointment, she said she didn't want to go because she was sleeping. Same thing happened with a homework I urgently needed to pass and, honestly, that wouldn't even bother me if it wasn't for the previous point. But I have to always be there for her even if It's not the same for me.

That's everything I can remember for now.... I'll probably update this list in the future, hoping my resentment towards her disappears one day. I know I'm probably being unfair but, from the moment they say they don't love you because you're not working hard enough and you're doing your best everyday, everything changes and something breaks inside you.

[rat-in-a-cloak]

7/13/22 - tw 3d (vent, diary)

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down to 194.4.

2.8 lbs down in the last two days :)

yesterdays counts ended up as -

intake - 708

burned - 147

net - 561

it was overall an okay day. wish it was lower, but i always do. net is fine, but i wish the intake had been much less.

tbh, it's fuckin insane to not be at 198 anymore. like, i've been stuck there for months and months and months, never binging but never restricting enough to do anything other than maintain 197 - 198. and it's super fuckin nice to get some progress and some hope finally. losing weight actually seems possible again, now.

i'm hoping for 193.4, asap. i originally had my goal as to get there by the 19th, but the shock to my system of restricting after a long period of eating regularly is really helping me drop a fair amount quickly. im thankful for that. i hope it continues for quite a while.

anyway, i've taken a walk so far today (about 30 minutes, with a heat retaining outfit on - about 184 cals burned.) i really need to get my watch back :((((( i miss knowing with accuracy. i still have the watch, but the charger is missing, and it's a super specific, weird kind of charger.

i have to go swimming later at an event for my sister, so hopefully i can burn a bit more then. im also trying to fast until then (20 hrs). that ends at 5:15 pm. i might get a snack/small dinner with my family at the event, depending on how it plays out. not sure tbh. it starts at 6, so i dont care if i have to have a small dinner - im on thin ice, since my family all knows about my past eating disorder shit. so i do have to be careful. and i dont wanna lead myself into a binge by restricting super super heavily, abruptly.

in any case, things are going pretty well (in ed terms). things are...actually also going pretty well with mental health, tbh. restricting is actually a working coping mechanism again rn. ik it wont last, but it's nice at the moment.

just hoping i can keep this goin and get back down to at least 150 by the time i leave for fall semester. i cant keep walking around campus looking like this. i need to stay dedicated. what do i have to lose, anyway? the world is doomed, and none of my other coping mechanism are working. it's either being constantly sewerslidal or this. and i'll take this, any day.