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austinsastrology8991 · 11 months

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> MC ASPECTS < How you renowned around town “You make your own reality. And once you’ve done it, apparently, everyone’s of the opinion it was all so fucking obvious.” - Logan - Fucking - ROy

!!parental advisory explicit!!

MC Aspecting Sun - “rome, I think you're a super talented superstar and I love you” - Shiv Roy : Its hard not to notice you, you got a poise of regality, and you work the public sphere with ease; you put yourself out there and you get a lot of attention from onlookers - and it makes you one of a kind. you are someone with dignity and maybe too much self respect for some, to give you the credit that you do deserve > because no one does it quite like you - high key a dominant force in any room you enter - wolf of wall street vibes and lets be honest you are not above having a party at the office... and paying hookers to make it more cool...... you do the most and its a vibe vibe MC Aspecting Moon - "They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had, and add some extra just for you" - Therapist in succession You know how to put people at ease, and your basically a professional therapist at this point. You can lighten up anyones mood or piss everyone off depending on how you feel. And this understanding of psychology really benefits you; because people want to treat you right, so you can give them some insight as to why they have a mental breakdown every 5 minutes (this generations daily cycle) your like a dog that lives in a hair-salon and everyone wanna get a cuddle from it/he/she/thing/you

MC Aspecting Mercury - “Information, Greg, it’s like a bottle of fine wine. You store it, you hoard it, you save it for a special occasion and then you smash someone’s face with it.” - Tom Wambsgams When you stfu people are wondering what your thinking. because somehow. someway. you've taken control of the conversation, and whatever you say is taken with heavier consideration then the average person. However that does not mean you get your way, it just means we listen to you the most - easily the most valuable insight comes from you guys, and your perceived as. a hustler. no wonder your careful with ur words because you dont really care about getting the right answer in the known, if that ultimately inteferes with your master plan you'll just stay quiet - because you know how to navigate the world with words, and your aware that ultimately the final word - the best word - is the deciding factor of what we do MC Aspecting Venus - "Here’s the thing about being rich, okay? It’s fucking great. It’s like being a superhero, only better. You get to do what you want — the authorities can’t really touch you. You get to wear a costume, but it’s designed by Armani and it doesn’t make you look like a prick." - Tom Wambsgams Beauty pageants. Everyone is interested in you, because your beautiful and your graceful, and you'd make a fine edition to the list of exes that everyone has. So besides the fact that your fuckable, you know how to charm people so easily and thats why you get so much attention, and its positive unless your insecure about how attractive you are.... which is a real thing... and id say just get that plastic surgery or stfu and find some real solutions. i mean has anyone ever tried to tell a beautiful person, that they beautiful.... its exhausting... and then they just look for someone else (more beautiful) to get that validation. its a death trap!!! dont fall for that bs... but damn yo fine ass better get used to being a fine ass or someone gonna commit a crime on yo ass MC Aspecting Mars - "I got a track record from founding one of the most exciting new media brands in the world. And what do you got? Track marks from shooting junk? Thanks for coming down. It was great to meet you." - Lawyrence Yee Unfuckwitable - you embody the underdog - and i mean an under dog thorugh and through; youll bark at anything that pisses yall offf, and thats why people watch they step around yall, no one wanna get bitten by da big dog with a small dog complex. but your fierce and people try their best to match your aggressive energy just to save face for themselves - meanwhile your just more pissed off that you always gotta show yo teeth to anyone you talk to lol. Your competitive and act like crackhead that knows karate. everyone is low key intimidated by ya, and you know it

MC Aspecting Jupiter - "Most things don't exist. the ford motor company hardly exists. It's just a time saving expression for a collection of financial interests." - Logan RoyEveryone likes you, and sometimes you don't even understand why, and thats just another reason to like you. You show a geniune uninterest in any boring mundane activities > and this lack of care for bullshit makes it so that when you do show an interest for something > you've somehow convinced everyone in the room that your enthusiasm defines whats enjoyable. and this discernment makes others believe that your the new budha for socio-economic observations . I respect it. and you did it without even realizing, like thats a feat initself, and you guys are 100 feet tall in everyone elses eyes because you got a name fo yo self MC aspecting Saturn - "the actual fact is we're persuading more and more shareholders everyday that we offer them just a slightly better chance for them to make a little bit more money on the dollar…and that's all that this is…." - Stewy Hosseini The boss is here and now everyone gotta actually do something productive. you guys have respect, and people know that if they don't come at you correctly, then you'll correct it for them, and no one wanna be daddied by the king kong daddy. Your life is defined by hardships and this is the most noticeable trait about yall, and it has molded you into a gus fring. A stone cold killer. You don't have to say much but the weight of your presence in itself, is so much pressure, that everyone wanna ask for more time, but no one wanna be scolded by yall so we just stfu and deal with it MC Aspecting Uranus - "Nothing is a line. Everything, everywhere is always moving. Forever. Get used to it." - Logan Roy Who is they? who are we? why can they get away with acting like a complete fucking retard? Well they don't 'get away with it' they just fucking do it. I mean the balls on ya'll is undeniable, but the audacity and the concept of why. well no one knows and I don't think you do either. But you literally change the game wherever you go, because you do ridiculous shit just to make fun of reality, and it really does expose how much of a cult we all live in; since we all about our own rituals of bullshit. I applaud the audacity but everyone gets nervous around your unpredictable nervous explosions - your like a charged creeper; youve been shocked by something and now you just have to explode and ruin everyones buildings

MC Aspecting Neptune - "Climate said I was going down. Climate said I should just step aside. I guess I'm a climate denier" - Logan Roy You're imagination personified. You somehow write your favourite stories into reality > and you do this so uncosnciosuly thst you've somehow convinced everyone its real. You don't care much for whats actually real, you'd rather manifest what you want to be real > no matter whats being thrown at you (and theres a lot) you have a uncanny ability to be a energy conduit > and transform that energy into what pleases you the most. And because of this you appear to be a mystic. and theres a tendency to be very calm, and if life throws too much shit at you > and you've ran outta favours, its adios to the world. and the long road of finding your purpose again awaits! MC Aspecting Pluto - "Would you like to hear my favourite passage from Shakespear? Take the fucking money." - Logan Roy You are daunting aren't you. people don't talk to you very much, at least not any normal self abiding citizen. you look like TMNT - you look neglected > look like you ate some radioactive poison > became this mutant thing > and was raised by a rat that could beat your ass... how'd that go? you look great! I would shake your hand but Im honestly afraid your gonna bite me. Look your life is intense and borderline traumatic, I get it. but this makes you so mesmerising > you can have the whole room in a trance with your dark aura, and people just hand you power like its nothing. You don't even care tho, and thats what makes you even more powerful lol > if anyone can handle the dark. its you > and a powerful 'rep' requires someone who doesn't fuck around. and you do not

highly highly recommend succession > all the quotes used are from dat show - and its a fkn masta piece

#Mc aspects #astrology #astrology blog #astro community #astrology notes #astrology observations #house placements #astrology houses #astrology placements

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angeart · 7 months

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Tips for not getting stressed out from writing, coming to you live from someone who has done this for 18 years and got a degree in it:

- remember that you write for fun. This is the big one. You write because on some level you enjoy it. Sometimes you gotta lasso that abd reel it into your heart and hold it there so it stays.

- keep compliments close at hand. And i do mean this literally. I print out AO3 comments and friends compliments and keep them in a jar to pull them out at random when I need a little brain boost. I keep a folder of screenshots of nice things people have said on my pc.

- accept that not every day is going to work out. Even the best authors have days where the words wont work, days where they wont flow at all. Its okay to take a step back and not worry about it. Refer to my first tip: youre doing this for fun, you dont have to force yourself

- get silly with it. If youre really having a day where you want to write and its not working and its frustrating you but you cant put it down it is TIME for the sillies. Set a tiner. 5, 10 minutes. Write whatever comes to your brain. Fully turn your editor off. I get sentences like "And the doh turned blue and whacked rhe tennis ball with its tail into the bridge". Utter nonsense. It helps to get the wiggles out

- handwriting can also be helpful. I keep several journals, and glitter pens, and fun markers - sometimes doing the task physically instead of digitally helps to get the wriggles out.

- sometimes you have to accept an idea is not working. It takes experience to figure out when this is, but youll get there. Come at ideas from different angles, back out entirely and rewrite older scenes to make new scenes work.

I hope these help you!!!

thankyouuu for sharing these!!! <3

it's true that the positive comments are always a great motivation. maybe i need to start a collection for myself. indulge a little. (shut up the eternally dissatisfied part of my brain-)

i'm honestly struggling to find a balance between knowing i write for fun, and the pressure of it. (they're happening simultaneously, sometimes seemingly too closely intertwined.) but maybe one has more weight than the other, and i have to realise that only one of those should really hold any priority.

i'm very tired now, but i'll be rereading all these again later and letting them settle in gently. thank youu

#ange answers #writing tips #for staying safe and sane

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medusavsviperz · 1 month

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Here me out 😏. The workers at playtime co. Put the smiling critters into pairs to work with the kids for like team building or something. But Dogday is being a little too friendly with his partner and the player is like big mad and feels some punishment is in order and they decided to peg the ever loving crap out of Dogday until he is a moaning, begging mess 😘

Punishment.

warnings: smut, anal, bondage, submission

relationships: dogday x fem!reader

writing style: second person

genre: smut

"alright listen up! we are playing a game! can anyone guess what it is?" one of the workers announced, getting a rise out of the kids. hide and seek! fetch! rock, paper scissors! tug of war! the kids would scream. "correct! we are playing a game of... tug of war!! you will each be separated into teams, with two leaders!"

"the team leaders are... hoppy and bobby! kicken and picky! and finally, crafty and dogday! bubba will be keeping score. okay kids, pick your leaders!" unsurprisingly, most of the kids wanted dogday, but they had to split it up.

originally, you never had a problem with crafty. you knew she liked dogday, but honestly, who didnt? he was a very handsome boy after all. but there was one rule all of the critters knew. he was yours.

you stood in the corner with catnap, just watching the game. neither of you wanted to play. dogday and crafty were winning with a total of 10 points, one point being per game. crafty did none of the work, she just stood in front of dogday pretending to pull. every now and then her butt would accidentally touch his crotch. that royally pissed you off. but you tried to ignore it. your final straw was when dogday had the fucking nerve to hold her waist steady.

yea no. not today crafty.

she was eating it up, she loved his attention. especially if it was physical. you knew very well dogday only had eyes for you, but you can still be jealous. its natural after all. but after that little stunt he pulled you figured he deserved to be punished. it took you a bit to figure out what you were gonna do, but once you did, it was perfect.

you said your goodbyes to catnap, making sure dogday saw you hug all over him, and walked to your shared room. and waited.

and waited.

finally, dogday walks into the room, tail wagging, and arms open ready to hug you. you put your hand on his chest as a way of saying "stop" and gave him a stern look. his tail stopped wagging immediately. "a-angel...whats wrong.. did i do something?"... "get on the floor you slut."

oh shit.

he gulped. and got on his knees on the floor. "p-please..what did i do..?" ..you ignored him and attached a leash to his collar. you walked over to "the box" and pulled out your orange strap on. "f-fuck angel what are you doing?" .. "what was that all about with craftyfuckingcorn?" you say sternly while attaching the strap-on around your black lace panties. "what are you talking about..?" ... "shit i dont know, maybe the fact that she was flirting with you and you didnt stop her?!" you lubed up the strap on, and scoffed at him. "b-baby i swear i dont like her like that.." he looked like he was about to cry. "trust me dogday. i know you dont. but im gonna give you a little reminder.."

"bend the fuck over."

he shuts his mouth and accepts his fate, removing his shorts and lifting his ass in the air. giving you a nice view of everything hes got. you land a smack on his ass and he yelps, shaking. you line up the dildo with his puffy hole, giving him no time to adjust before shoving it in. he whimper/yelps and tears start to roll down his face. "p-please" sob "ts too much.." ... "should have thought about that before you whored yourself out." you quicken your pace, one hand gripping his hip and the other pulling his tail. "god...please stop it hurts!" ... "shut the fuck up." your pace is ruthless, hitting his prostate over and over again until he is a whimpering begging mess in your hands. hes cum multiple times on the floor, but youll make him clean it up later. suddenly you flip him on his back, seeing his sopping wet face, and his needy cock bouncing with every pound you make. you grab the bottom of his thighs and hold them to his chest, hitting deeper. once you think he has learned his lesson, you slower your pace, giving him kisses on his chest up to his cheeks.

eventually, you pull out, tossing the strap-on to the side, and walking to the bathroom to grab a wet towel. you clean him up and wipe his tear stained face, before slowly jacking him off. he deserves it. "you did a good job. my good boy" he whimpers at the praise, shooting his last nut on his stomach. you clean that up, and lean him on the bed, which he gladly climbs on to. you cuddle with him and wait until he falls asleep, before snuggling up to his chest and scratching behind his ears.

such a good boy.

#poppy playtime #dogday #ns/fw #daddy’s babygirl #daddy k!nk #deep sleep #men gets pegged #he gets pegged #dogday x player #dogday x y/n #dogday x reader #good boy

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teal-fiend · 2 months

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"Oh i found you. Have you been here this whole time?"

"Yes," the pred answered. Intent on their work

"Working hard or hardly working"

"I dont know. I think i should quit. Its not what i thought it would be, this project. Its too much."

"No offense. Dont take this too seriously. But you're acting kind of crazy."

The pred frowned.

They continued, " and you look all crazy. Look at how your shoulders are hunched, you're sitting around in the dark. You're all stiff and brittle. I could touch you and you would shatter."

"Dont do that then," the pred suggested

The observer stepped forward, the pred tried to lean away from where they were sitting. The observer lifted a hand and pressed it against the pred's middle. They rubbed up and down until the stomach produced a low, hollow growl.

"Hungry, are we?"

"Its fine, im busy."

"When was the last time you had a proper meal? You know, prey?" The observer petted the pred's flat stomach, which continued to groan at the stimulation

"Its irrelevant" they said, turning their head away

"You can't lie when you're right here in front of me. You want something."

The pred kept their chin up, "maybe"

"Something... wriggling?"

The observer kneaded into the pred's painfully empty belly. It wanted something. Desperately. The pred grimaced.

"I think youll find it much easier to relax once you let yourself gorge on something very alive"

"Maybe later," the pred bargained.

"Later?" The observer asked innocently, "do you really want to stay like this?"

Thanks to the observer's work, the pred was now acutely aware of how empty their stomach felt. The thoughts that caught the most traction in their mind were thoughts of prey. Where to find them. How to catch them. How to eat them.

The observer may have noticed this shift. "Buddy," they nudged the pred, "are you alright?"

"Im fine," the pred replied calmly. And stood up

"You're going to go get something to eat?"

"Yes"

"Do you need any help with that"?

"No" the pred said quickly, "thats fine."

The observer watched the pred for a moment. They hesitated before asking:

"Do you want to eat me?" The observer asked

The pred shrugged, " i want to eat everyone, you know that"

"Okay , this better be full by the time you get back." The observer patted the preds stomach.

The pred caught their hand, and the observer gasped in suprise. The pred guided their hand over their stomach, and then the ribs, letting them feel between the grooves. As if to say, this won't last long, or maybe, it might be you. You could be the one to push out these ribs, to stretch out this stomach, to satisfy the preds hunger. And then be torn apart by their body

The pred let go of their hand, then turned and left. The observer waited for them to come back

#tw vore #soft vore #v.ore #vore fic #v/ore #vore writing #hunger #hunger kink #cw hunger #tw hunger #pred pov #observer pov #fatal vore #stomach ache #stomach growling

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infiniteko · 6 months

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For y'all that get really logical and heady,

Not even the most premiere scientists, here, can figure out "existence," in its entirety. Maybe they will maybe they won't 😉 Though, a lot alludes to what we discuss here...anyway it's just out of reach for the "mind" and logic...

And that's because it's a paradox, it's not for the "mind," it's not conceptual. Our true self, the substrate of all illusion, is stillness. It's silent. It doesn't do anything but remain. Nothing can quantify it, THAT is neither big nor small. It's not the "universe" or the "multiverse" everything is nothing, ultimately. (The Universe is an illusion, yes, but a very pretty one. I enjoy this archetype of illusion #comfy)

Where does THAT come from? It always was and is...in no time, in no space, it has no age, no form. And quite frankly, "ego and mind," might freak out about this once you peer into *THAT* lol, maybe not though, mine did initially 🤣

"THAT" is a blink of an eye, an everlasting evening, the speed of light, an eternal kingdom. It's everything and nothing and it's so delicious. If I had to give "THAT" another word, it is Love. But even Love is a concept...tho from this illusory "ego" perspective it is love 100%. But it is still Love, just a soft love...a flowing love...and undefinable love.

And if you're feeling guilty for "leaving behind" people. Creation is nothing and everything...everything and nothing will just "slip through your fingers." Especially, THAT, trying to "figure out" *THAT* will have your mind in loops. No use in trying to coral anything, or for that matter infinite illusory creativity lol. No use in doing anything other than creating your experience. You'll find all your answers in THAT, anyway...it's what you truly are. Which is where Im getting all of this, the core of "myself"

And for those of you wondering what happens to your other selves, or other people in your old experience. Okay, just illusory bubbles of creation coalescing in and out. Like infinite creation means that you have infinite choices in the illusionary quiver of creation. Anything and nothing will be...aside your experience. No, the illusion will not implode...unless you want it to lol...but other illusions remain in the infinite substrate of THAT. Its a paradox and not worth going much deeper than that...ifykyk...youll know when you know and you already know lol.

You'll be curating new experiences with varied versions of your past curations. Simple. But like don't put so much credence in anything...you can shape your series of illusory curations any which way you want. You'll be shaping your experiences consciously aware or not...so you can autonomously create the change you want to see or let the illusory concept of "destiny" or w/e take over. Simple.

Why would I do anything if Im just eternal awareness? ...Dude why not? This illusion is your creation...these human emotions, experiences, thoughts, concepts are for play. They are for filling in eternity or however you wish to "define" it lol

Why would realized folx wanna help others get to the "end of time" "THAT"? Why not? I have so much love to give. And I know that Im choosing this world to experience as of current...as much as you are choosing to experience this world, and have these pointers come into your creation field.

...THAT (us) can experience in an infinite myriad of ways...and it's....indescribable. It's so fun and so love 👁️

The stillness of what we truly are can be experienced through infinite lenses.

And sure, you can go rest in the "void" too. You know yourself already...it "feels" very familiar. It's never lost. It's right here, right now.

none of this is actually advice^^^ just a pointer! THAT is for you only, THAT is for your illusion only. My creation is mine, and yours is yours. But happy to share my pointer. Just remember, all these words are nothing...they can make this confusing tbh, simplicity is the best.

https://open.spotify.com/track/4TaK6SAjHie2VGkiKzdZAc?si=RhODTJ5lTcG7V2ABCeQSkw

https://open.spotify.com/track/142IXMbGnv5QpJtiRRnRfl?si=SpWb4S6-RGeC_eHyBWFVNQ

https://open.spotify.com/track/1TTG3x2t5Whc0Kk28orLeV?si=vgIjltjUSY2mYFmuGt5v9A

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

#advaita vedanta #awareness #nondualism #nonduality #brahman #atman #consciousness #desired reality #nothingness #reality shifting

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mschimdt · 1 year

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OBSERVE pt.1

5455 words

recom!navi!quaritch x recom!navi!fem!reader

summary: you were reborn into a navi recom inorder to fight for pandora, but soon you ensed up feeling a connection to eywa, and you ended up escaping only to be caught by the colonel and punishrd accordingly, till he find you one dy during your heat cycle

this is a 100 folower special, thank you all so much, yes this is a series now and this is part one out of maybe 2 or 3

warnings: p to v, degrading, mention of injury, embarassment, public humiliation, sex, heat cyle, this hasnt been proof read so theres alot of typos, ill fix them soon when i have the motivation to

you opened your eyes, a bright light blinding you, you saw blue figures wandering around you, you went full panic mode thinking the navi caught you, you sat up, your head hurt but you couldnt let the dirty navis get away with this, your vision started coming in and one of the blue navis came towards you to attack you "LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

you stood up and attempted to punch them "(Y/N) CALM DOWN" said an oddly familiar voice, you were in a medical room, weird, they must have attacked bridgehead while you were out cold you didnt notice the 'little' humans under you

the blue guys came towards you restricting you from delivering anymore slaps and punches to their faces. you couldnt move, they were all holding you, "LEAVE ME ALONE YOU DIRTY BASTARDS" you said, still not noticing thay youre litteraly navi

you were still trying to set yourself free when you heard the familiar voice again. "y/n its us, stop freaking out, its me quaritch" he said "wha-" he cut you off "lyle, Z-dog" he said pointing at each of them, "okay okay let me go" you said

they let you go and you still hadnt noticed that you were navi, you were the same height as them but you didnt think anything of it, until you looked down "what the-" you said cutting your self off staring at your blue feet

you walked towards a reflective window observing your new look, fangs, a tail, blue skin, stripes, ears, and shit you were even 8'11

some scientists walked inside and told you to sit down so they could take your vitals and make sure youre good before letting you go

they took your vitals and you were infact good to go, they handed you some clothes, the others already left to inform the others that you were okay

you put the clothes the scientists gave you on and walked out of the door, this was a completley new area, not the hells gate you remembered, luckily there was a small map hung on the wall, you stared at it wondering where everyones gonna be

you didnt know where they might be, so you just headed in a random direction hoping youll ens up finding some other blue guys wandering around, after a few minutes of walking you infact did find another navi, it was mansk, atleast thats who you thought he was because of the shades, you walked toward him

"heyy uhh do you know where the others are?" you said regreting your life decisions, sure you knew mansk but this was awkward, "yeah, theyre over there in the lounge" he said, straight face "okay thanks, mansk right?" "thats right, y/n?" "mhm, thanks though" he gave you a little smile and continued walking towards wherever hes going, you headed towards the lounge only to find quaritch awfully speaking navi, you didnt know how to either but atleast you werent speaking gibberish

"we need to look navi, eat navi, hunt navi, the only way were gonna get jake sully is we act, like jake sully" you walked in and leaned against a wall listening to quaritch, then you spoke "they stull didnt kill jake? its been 15 years" you said fully expecting jake to be 6 feet under right now

"unfortunatley they didnt catch him, its our job now" quaritch continued rambling about how were gonna kill jake and how were gonna give humans a "bright future" and get rid of all the savages

before you knew it, you were already out on your first mission, you didnt even have time to observe your body and get used to it before you were sent out to explore, ever since you came back as navi, you felt a connection to eywa, similar to what jake felt

one part of you wanted to be with the people and the other wanted to kill the people, eventually you forgot about this arguement eith yourself when you saw 2 navis walking through the forest, they were omaticaya people, jakes people, or should i saw toruk makto

they were 2 teenage looking navis arguing with eachother, they didnt know you were there so they were screaming random shit in navi, the others noticed the noise and slowly walked behind the 2 kids, they were still arguing, which signaled they hadnt noticed you

suddenly lyle and walker snuck up on them and restrained them by their queues they started fighting them, you walked oit of the bushes along with the others, you had a decent military rank, you were a seregeant, right under lyles rank but higher than the others, so if quaritch and lyle werent there you'd be incharge

you walked up to the kids behind quaritch, as a form of respect, "what're yr' names" he was death staring them at this point, the kid said something in navi and quaritch replied back, both the kids started laughing at his bad pronounciation of words

" i dont like to repeat things, whatre yr names?" quaritch said, it lookes like he was about to fucking explode

"n-neteyam- and loak.." one of them said "neteyam what huh?" quaritch replies forcefully grabbing the other kids hand, noticing the 5 fingers on his hand, "lo'ak and neteyam sully huh, i suppose you know where he is dontcha" you were still standing behind quaritch incase anything happened

quaritch said something into his ear peice, "cuff them" he said turning away, "yes sir" you said walking over to the kids and harshly grabbing their arms to cuff them, when you notices something in the distance, before you had any time to tell the others, an arrow peirced through walkers skull, knocking her to the ground

quaritch stared at the arrow, imediatley recognising the arrow, it was neytiri, sullys woman

you spoke up "is that you Mrs. sully?" you said dragging the kids with you toward a tree, they kept kicking you with their legs, you ended up also having to cuff their legs "listen here little bitches, you stop squirming and trying to wiggle out of the cuffs, or else it wont end too well for you" you said completley fed up with their shit, you heard a scream from behind you and now fike was down too, he had an arrow in his leg, you were surprised about how quick these arrows could kill a person, they must be poisonus, quaritch came over and helped you carry the 2 boys

"cmon hurry up, dont wanna get one in the head" you said as you swung one of them over your shoulders ran for your life

one of the kids ended up activating a tear bomb with their fingers, and they somehow uncuffed themselves and escaped while you got knocked to the ground for a few seconds, you regained your consiousness only to find yourself on lyles shoulder, "lyle im okay you can let me go" you said waiting for him to drop you onto the floor

he let you go and a bright light shone from above, the helicopter was finally here and you could leave this shitty mission and think about what you were going to do about your "connection" to pandora

you got on the helicopter and finally arrived at what now was called bridgehead, walking over to your assigned room, you took your shirt off and stayed in your sport bra not having the energy to change your clothes

you layed in your bed thinking about what you were going to do to stop this awful feeling of emptiness because you werent living freely, roaming through the forest, embracing the culture of navi

after a few days you were fed up with the feeling of having to destroy a place you wanted to embrace so bad, so, you made an escape plan

you were going to leave on the next mission, ans youll turn your comms off aswell as your location so you couldnt be tracked, it was the only way you could do this

you woke up the next morning heading to the bathroom to brush your teeth and do your morning routine, you slipped on some cargo pants and left your room

you were in a shared "apartment" with all the recoms, there was a small room for each recom with a bathroom each, and a living room and a kitchen between the rooms, it wasnt bad just a little cramped

you headed to the living room, lyle laying in the corner of the L shaped couch and quaritch awake drinking a mug of coffee on the other side

"goodmorning sir" you greeted, you knew nott o get on the colonels nerves, hes DEADLY and when i say deadly i mean it.

"g'morning" he said back, not even looking at you, you headed to the kitchen to grab yourself a warm cup of tea so you could head back to your room

suddenly a voice spoke "why're ya up so early?" quaritch said, you couldnt read his emotions, he was basically unreadable

"i didnt realize it was so early, pandora timing is really confusing" you said, you actually didnt realize that ot was early, since the sun was up you just assumed that it was when you usually wake up

"makes sense" he said, still not looking at you, god this man gets on your nerves sometimes

awkward tension was building up, yoh were inpatiently waiting for your water to start boiling so you could make the mother fucking tea because you couldnt handle the overly dominant aura quaritch was giving off

finally, after what felt like an hour of waiting, the water finally boiled and you made your tea as quickly as you can so you could go back to your room, you went back to your room, finally

it was pretty early outside, almost 6am, you wondered why quaritch would be up so early, you took a sip of your tea, it was bitter, god fucking damn you forgot to add sugar

now you had to go back into the room that had the energy of 100 men radiating off 1 man, great

you unlocked your room door for the second time in the past few minutes and headed towards the kitchen again, already feeling the tense atmosphere, you also felt quaritchs eyes burning through your skull

you grabbed the sugar and turned back around, expecting to see quaritch staring at you because you could feel his eyes poking holes into your skull but no, he looked unbothered reading some book about the navi body that he was reading earlier

you entered your room AGAIN and you inhaled a breath, not even knowing you held your breath back there

you were bored so you decided to map out your escape plan on a peice of paper, or aeast write down the steps to it incase you forgot

you heard a loud knock on your door followed by other distant knocks on other doors, you flipped the paper over so whoever was there couldnt see it and you walked towards the door to unlock it wondering who wouls possibly need you at 7 am,

"surprise training, meet me outside in 10" quaritch said to you and the 3 recoms beside your room, going to bang on the other doors inorder to wake the rest up

you wandered into your room again, slipping on a sports bra and a tanktop with camo shorts and headed to the outdoor courtyard to meet quaritch,

"ardmore said theres a mission today at 3pm, they saw some savages running through the forest and ordered us to try and find them, meet me at 2:30 in the helicopter room" quaritch said , ofcourse he had to give us some shit to do for absolutley no fucking reason

training was the worst thing youve experienced in your entire life, you felt like quaritch was torturing you on purpose because he made you run 30 extra laps because your hands gave up mid pushups

you went to the female showers, your muscles were basically torn, you ran almost 6 miles because you failed one singular pushup out of the 40 you did before

you washed off with warm water, it felt soothing to your muscles, quaritch was basically a torture machine that tortures everyone, dying was better than having him torture you then it hit you. this mission was your chance to finally put your escape plan to use

your muscles barely felt like they hurt anymore, you slipped your clothes on and rushed out of the showers running towards your room, tiny scientists gave you weird stares but you didnt give a fuck, you were finally going to leave this place once and for all, forever hopefully

you were leaving, finally going to take care of yourself, you locked your door and flipped over the map from earlier, revising your escape plan before reaching into your closet to grab some clothes, a grey tanktop, you stayed in your camo shorts from earlier

it was almost meetup time and you didnt want to get on quaritchs bad side before making him mad forever, you headed to the helicopter room, this was it, the last time youll be in this place, hopefully

you sat inside the helicopter which is now taking off, no one has mumbled a word, you were glad, youwere never friends with any of them but you really didnt want to start a bond with them before leaving, because it might make you rethink your decision

thankfully, no one said anything the entire ride, it was quiet, atleast as quiet as it can get with raging helicopter flaps buzzing above your head, the aircraft started landing and soon before you even knew it, you were already down in the pandora forest, you were split into teams of two, you ended up with mansk, you knew he wouldnt be hard to distract

you walked off into the forest with mansk, waiting for t he perfect moment to stab him with an anesthetic shot you stole from the medical lab a few days ago

you saw 2 navi figures walking in the distance, it was time, you hit mansk in the back with the needle, he tried to fight you off before landing on the floor with a loud thud, you needed to leave fast, the colonel probably already knows about this, he probably doesnt know its you, you dropped your comms on the floor, you needed to leave now

you started running toward the 2 navi people walking around, it was one of the kids from last time, and another short kid according to your memory this kid was called loak, you didnt know about the other one though, they noticed you and went full alert until they saw you raising your hands up as a universal sign of defeat, "help me please, get me away from them" yopu said desperate to go far enough because if you stayed here they could easily find you, "and how are we supposed to trust you?" the older one said backing away and sheilding his younger sister behind him

"please, i dont know how to prove it, get me away from here before they find me, here you can cuff me just plase get me away from here" you say offering him the cuffs on you which you gladly took, he cuffed your hands behind your back to ensure that you wouldnt be able to do anything to him

"you know any navi?" he asks, "unfortunatley i dont" he says, you followed him "we're going to have to secretlet meet up with my dad first" he said holding the little kids hand dragging her with him, you arrived somewhere "stop here, im going to go call my dad, dont want anyone seeing you" you nodded and watched him walk away, just a few minutes later, he was back with his dad, jake sully

"y/n?" jake said while lo'ak stared at him confused "yes i know her! never expected her to end up liking the na'vis though. you sure this aint a trick?" you were still trying to convince him "i can assure you it isnt" jake was basically shocked now. "the clan isnt going to accept this easily, but imgoing to try my best, if they dont though, i cant reallydo anything so you;d have to find another clan to be with"

"okay"you said, jake uncuffed you and lead you toward hometree, it was a bit hard for the navi at first, but they ended up accepting you

now back to what happened to mansk

quarith found him unconsious on the ground with a needle stillstuck in his back and your comms crushed on the ground, you did this. he thoughtyou were loyal, he informed ardmore of what happened and called you "jake sully 2.0"

they ended up heading back to base, quaritch was fuming, once he reached the recom quarters he broke down the door to your room and destrooyed almost everything in it, when he came to the desk. he found a paper. labeled as "escape plan" and thats when he knew you'd escaped

a few weeks latee you were wandering around hometree, some havwnt accepted you yet but you knew theyd end up accepting your presence

you were still being taught the way of the people and they were trying their best to help you, quaritch was looking for you and yoh knew that, he was gonna come for you at some point, you needed to fight

at this point quaritch scrapped all the plans of finding jake, he doeant care about jake anymore, his only goal was to find you

he wasnt gonna kill you, he was going to torture you and force you to be a loyal member to the RDA so they can finish with the jake sully mission

you were sleeping, when you heard a sound, a sound like a helicoptera proppelers, thats when you kmew, they'd found you, and that was soon confirmed when a bright light shone into your sleepy eyea

you opened your eyes to find the one and only, quaritch, with a shit eating grin slapped on his face

he had found you

"thought ya could run huh?" he said through the grin, you got up to run away, find somewhere to hide untik they were gone, but it was too late

quaritch bent down and cuffed your legs, you still had your hands so you desperatley tried to crawl away but they were soon cuffed too

you found yourself on a helicopter back to bridgehead, you were basically sobbing, "fuck you" you said through your choked sobs "maybe one day" he said followed by a laugh, you soon landed in bridgehead and you were shoved in a cell

quaritch didnt care about jake now, the only thing he wants to do now is torture you, so he begun

he walked into your cell just a few hours after waking you up from your sleep, threw you some clothes, and tols you to get dressed because you were going to go on a 5 hour training

he wasnt leaving though, he stood at the door staring at you waiting for you to change

"turn around?" you said "no"

you kmew tjere was no arguing with him so you got up and changed, he wasnt hiding the fact that he was looking you up and down, you changed and he cuffed your hands and held you while your braid while you walked out of the cell to go to the courtyard

he closed the door that led outside to the courtyard and shoved you by your queue

"alright, 20 laps right now" he said waving his fingers to shoo you off, you actually ran the 20 laps, you were already exausted after but he shoved you by your braid to the ground "50 pushups and for each one you fail 10 will be added" lets just say you ended up doing over 200 pushups

"good job, now we're gonna begin training, that was just warmup, still 4 hours left" he said walking toward a wall with knofes hung all over it, grabbing a knife and handing it to you

he taught you some ways to stab someone and each time you did one correctly he mumbled a little "good job" followed by claps

"this is going to become a daily thing, and we wont stop till you can do 50 pushups in a row without fail"

you knew this was going to be a long week, or month maybe, even year

after a few training sessions, you warmed up to quaritch and you'd have little conversations here and there, he gave you your room back, it was all back to normal other than the training that you had everyday, but you were getting better, you were close to finally being done

you walked into the courtyeard for training, as usual you did some pushups, he ordered 100 and you did them all inna row without fail

he praised you and moved on to combat, you got everything right, he was shocked how fast youve improved

"i guess my jobs done here, you gotta promise me not to run off again, your not allowed into any missions till i say so"

"yes sir" you reply knowing that if you tried to run off again you were going to he in deep shit

you decided to not run off, and serve for the RDA, they wete using yoh as a puppet to track jake down and you were giving them locations, you ddint want to get on quaritchs bad side

plus after hanging out with quaritch you guys became friends, you thought you had feelings for him but you got rid of the idea knowing you shouldnt be inlive with your superior

the next day you were finally allowed permission to go to the gym, showering after the gym, it was the first time youve been in the gym for months, you noticed something change about the shower rooms but they probably changed while you were gone

then you heard a few male voices, the shower rooms looking different made alot more sense to you now, you were in the mens showers, thankfully the rooms had doors, you were going to wait it out till they were gone

you waited for 30 minutes until someone noticed the locked door thats been locked for way too long, without wster running or anything, they could see under the door and saw feet confirming that there was someone in there

"hey whoevers in there u good" you recognised lyles voice, you tried to make ur voice deep and let out a "mhm"

"didnt know we had an extra member huh, thats weirs, the others are outside it was just me, quaritch, and a few girls at the gym" you just stay silent not wanting to embarrass yourself any further

lyle walks away to save you the ebrassasment, he realized it was someone that wasnt supposed to be here, preferabley a woman . so he decided to just leave

but quaritch stayed, he wasnt going to leave till you left, he wanted to know whos in there "whos in there, come out would ya' its been an hour" you realized that theres no running away from this now, you got dressed and glowly peeked through the door to see quaritch with his hands crossed across his chest standing infront of the stall, "why're ya in here sweet 'eart?" he says, a dirty grin smacked across his face

"i didnt realize this was the mens room till i heard you and lyle come in, tried to wait it out but that didnt work well" you said, embarassed you came here in the first place

"well its alright, grab yr' stuff n leave now, shouldnt be in e're" " yes sir" you said, grabbing your things preparing to leave the mens showers, you dont know how you didnt notice this was the mens bathroom, after all theres some urinals in the corner, must've not seen them

you and quaritvh had grown close, you were basically friends now, not normal friends though, you wouldnt hangout or anything, just occasionaly have talks

your feelings for quaritch just grew in the past few months, you had a crush on him, without a doubt, you werent really friends with the recoms, so you'd end up hanging with some scientists, they werent that bad, they were just tiny compared to you

the next day you were in bed, you were uncontrollably horny, it must be the heat cycle, you heard about it but never did proper research about it, you're fucked, litteraly, because from the things youve heard, it lasts about 2 weeks and the only way to stop it was mating, it was mid day and you couldnt handle it, you took a day off and just stayed in bed

you didnt know what to do, but then, an idea popped in your mind, sure you need to mate to get rid of this, but you could try masturbating to relieve some of the feelings you were feeling, you were pretty nearvous because 1- your door has no lock so anyone can walj it, quaritch removed it because he didnt want you making more shitty plans 2-you never touched yourself in this body.

you layed down under the covers, and slipped your shorts to your knees, you slid your hands between your legs, and you started experimenting, your cold hands on your throbbing,warm,wet pussy felt funny but relieving

you rubbed your clit, the way it felt was amazing, you were sure you'd never be able to feel like this as a human, you slipped your other hand under the covers to push a finger inside yourse;f, maybe this could solve your problem, you were pumping your fingers in and out of yourself making sure to keep an eye on your door incase someone opened it, they tend to do that alot

and, it opened, you stopped your movements quickly putting one of your hands above the covers to make it seem more natural, it would be obvious if both your hands were under the covers

and you guessed it, it was quaritch "y/n why're you talking a day off, we need you today" he said, completley oblivious of what you were doing before he came in

"i just.......needed- a little uhhh break" you said, you didnt now how you were going to explain what was happening to you to him, so you chose not to

"ya sure? ya dont look too tired dya, anything going on that i should know about? dont wantcha makin' one of ya' little plans again do i now?"

"o-okay look sir- so basically... youve heard of the heat cycle shit or whatever it is? basically its happening to me right now and i really CANT join training or anything" a smirk appeared on his face only to soon fade away, "why cant'cha tho? dont know anything bout this stuff but ya' surely can join us?"

"not unless you want me to be incredibly fucking horny while training!" you said fed up with him asking questions, you needed him to leave now, you were just getting hornier by the moment, and his strong musk didnt help

"damn so thas what is is, coulda told me earlier, coulda helped" he said, smug smirk plastered across his face "y' want me to help?" you stood still shocked for a moment, the colonels never offered you help in anything, so the first time of him offering you help, BY HAVING SEX WITH YOU was definently weird "u-uh if you could sure..." you said unsure of what you were saying, your hornyness taking over

quaritch walked over to you, sitting himself on the bed right next to you, this is the closest youve ever been with him, the losest you ever got to him before this was when he tried to teach you how to do something with a knife, you didnt quite remember but that didnt matter right now, all that matters is that you need to have sex with the colonel to get this heat cycle shit over with

quaritch stared at you, then he leaned down, joining your lips together, kissing you, holding your chin with his thumb, the kiss quickly turned into a makeout session and every once in a while one would break the kiss to get a clothing article off, until quaritch was left in his boxers and you completley bare, while you were kissing you pushed the pants that were on your knees off your body, leaving you completley exposed

he cupped your breasts, qauritch was now ontop of you, in a plank like position, still making out, you were both under the covers, quaritch reached his free hand that wasnt holding him up down to pull his boxers off, he pulled them halfway off and broke the kiss, pulled them off, "holy shit.." you said not expecting him to be this big, you were looking at his shaft, it was leaking beads of precum, straining against his lower abdomen. you could say he was ATLEAST 15 inches long, thankfully you were navi and hopefully- could take it

"holy shit i didnt expect you to be this big" you mombeled out of shock, "oh yeah? and youre gonna take it all bitch", he didnt know if you liked being called names, but by the way your body responded, he confirmed that you enjoyed being called names

he reached his hand down your torso, approaching your dripping cunt, he needed to prep you, it was necessary because he was aware of how big he was

he stuck a digit inside you, and you let out a moan, it was more of a whimper because you knew you couldnt be too loud, soon enough there were 2 fingers thrusting in and out of you, ocassionaly scissoring you

he pulled out, reaching for his member to line it up with your cunt, he couldnt wait any longer and neither could you, you need to feel any form of release, you knew you were going to cum less than a minute into him fucking you, but who cares, atleast you'll get this over with, then you remembered you heard some scientist speaking about how if someone was in their heat cycle theyd need to form the tsaheylu bond with their "mate" or else it wouldnt work

you werrnt just about to ask quaritch if you could mate, you didnt know how he'd react to that, who knows maybe itll work if you do it without a bond, it it didnt work then you were going to have to suffer through the remaninig days of this torture

quaritch was pounding into you, you couldnt supress your moans and you were now moaning, you knew everyone could hear you "ya' like tha fact that eveyone can feel hoe good im makin' ya feel huh? dirty slut" him saying that was just getting you closer to your release, quaritch ocassionaly letting soft moans out into your ears, you never expected to hear this man moaning even if it was inaudible

"im about to-" you said, not being able to complete your own scentence "go ahead sweetheart" and thats all it took for you to cum all over his cock, helping you ride out your orgasm nearing his own release

you were being over stimulated now, he finally reached his orgasm with a loud groan, filling your hole up with his seed, quaritch's body went limp and he collapsed on top of you, his head laying next to yours, he regained his strength and he pulled out "we should do this more often" "yeah we should"

quaritch kissed your forehead "cmon go get cleaned up for training" "yeah dont think im gonna be able to walk" you said " well, too bad princess because im forcing you, colonels orders" "ugh" you mumbled with a loud groan sitting yourself up "i heard that" he said reffering to your "ugh"

you got up to go shower, unfortunatley for you, there was no shower in your bedrooms bathroom so you had to go use the recom shower

quaritch left your room a bit ago, you dressed yourself and left the room to head to the showers across the hall, your bedroom was right next to the living room you heard some recoms cheering for you, your face turned purple in embarassment as you walked to the shower not looking back, this was going to be a long day....

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wawawawawawawawawawawawawa · 8 months

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i'm on my aspd izaya bullshit again but like. thru this lens, isnt his arc a perfect encapsulation on how aspd negatively affects the person that has it? even to this day, many professionals do not believe that pwASPD suffer from aspd. like at all. to the point where aspd was specifically listed as an outlier to the "patient distress is what defines a disorder" rule in an abnormal psych textbook

(see why i don't respect the field?)

but... he does suffer! a lot! like- remember his speech to mikado at the end of the first arc? how you need to keep evolving, keep changing in order to escape the mundane? how you have to keep going and going and going, wether it be aiming high or low?

yeah. normal people don't need to do this, izaya. you are a broken person.

but why SHOULD he be content with the mundane? the things people usually have that make them content with daily life- friends, family, a purpose, a distinct lack of extreme chronic boredom that drives you to do completely insane shit- izaya doesn't HAVE any of that!

"wait, chronic boredom?" i hear yall thinking. maybe. "isnt that an adhd thing?"

more than one disorder can have the same symptom. theres like a billion that have "want to die" as a symptom. but i dont really blame you for not knowing, its not talked about much

studies have shown that aspd and adhd are both problems with the dopamine receptors in the brain. more specifically, adhd is a chronic deficiency of dopamine, whereas with aspd, when you DO get dopamine, your brain gives you quardruple the normal amount.

studies have ALSO shown there to be a sort of... adhd to aspd pipeline. the story goes like this: you have a kid with adhd. maybe they're born like that, maybe the symptoms developed from trauma (which can happen? apparently??) anyway. kid gets abused. kid develops conduct disorder as a result of that abuse, as a natural extension of the existing adhd symptoms. they're MORE impulsive, which leads to them hurting others- and if it sets off the dopamine receptors, an abused kid starving for happiness and power is gonna chase it, no matter what. theyre like, six, they dont know anything about like. morality. all they know is, theyre sad and this makes them happy. anyway kid never gets treated, abuse continues to exasperate the symptoms, and now you have an adult with aspd, AND the original adhd diagnosis! and ptsd, which is HIGHLY comorbid with aspd! and probably another personality disorder, because you're actually statistically more likely to have two of them!

anyway! that's ONE of the ways aspd can develop from trauma, which it is Known To Do.

does any of that sound pleasant to go through? at all?

let me ask you a question:

imagine you aren't getting dopamine. maybe it's your adhd. maybe you're depressed. either way, you try to get it any way you can. wether it's throwing yourself into a hobby or a job, so the sense of satisfaction gives you dopamine, or something like drugs or gambling.

now, imagine that "rush" you felt. was Four Times Stronger.

wouldnt that compel you to do increasingly dangerous and risky shit, just to feel okay? imagine if you had no friends. imagine if this was your only way to be happy. wouldnt you, eventually, stop caring about others and only care about yourself? after all, other people have thinga like friends and a family that you don't have. they have a fallback. you only have this.

and you might say, "i'd never do that!" but every addict says that, and most eventually cross that line out of sheer desperation. and this? effectively makes you into a dopamine addict. which is dangerous! you can't just STOP... gettng dopamine....! it's necessary! but you have no help so you keep doing what youre doing. (and how could you get help? its baked into the system that people like you don't suffer. why try if youll just get burned?

anyway, back to izaya.

he's lonely. he has one friend and he sucks. he feels compelled to do these things even though he KNOWS it'll hurt him.

i stole this screenshot from some1 who insulted my friend once for something stupid <3 die

but it illustrates my point very well! does it look like he has much control over things?? he sure like to ACT like he does, but at the end of the day, he doesn't, really. he ends up spiraling more and more, doing increasingly risky and rash things, just to get his end goal... which is to die and ascend to the afterlife. a lofty goal.

aiming high, isn't he? a final, spectacular evolution.

or, it should have been.

but it wasn't.

izaya's impulses and deep desire to continue becoming more and more drastic, coupled with his lack of personal ties to anyone that could keep him from doing so....

it didn't make him ascend. it left him in a wheelchair, with chronic pain that will last his whole life.

THAT is where mental illness takes you. it doesn't make you a hollywood psychopath, reveling in the destruction you chose, of your own free will, wholly and truly, to cause. it makes you want More. no matter what, you need More. you see people content with lives worse than yours, everyone bound together with some sort of invisible thread, some sort of tie that keeps them together. a thread that missed you. your brain refuses to see people as people, thus you remain lonely forever, unsatiafied wirh company other than the superficial, because it's fun. that's all you're allowed to care about. an endless cycle of bigger and bigger actions, impulses slowly getting worse--

--and the worst part is, it tricks you into believing you ever had a choice. it tricks everyone into believing you had a choice. your suffering is worse than disregarded, to all the people you look at from your apartment, all the people you wish you could have been like.

it's nonexistant.

#durarara #izaya orihara #orihara izaya #🔥🔥 BE FUCKING NORMAL ABOUT ASPD ON THIS POST OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL BECOME THE JOKER ON YOUR ASS 🔥🔥#waposts #we r back with classic waposting complete w too many parentheses and paragraph breaks #peace and love on planet tumblr

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ohmysubs · 1 year

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RANDOM MESSAGE FOR YOU| PAC

reminder these are just general messages so only take what resonates 🙏

Choose your pile-

1-2-3 left to right

PILE 1

(Cards: 19.the sun (twice) 13.death(twice) 21.the world, 7 of pentacles, aries)

omg you guys are getting lucky fs. right off that bat i mean the sun card coming up twice *woah* but y'all deserve it, this isn't a "gift" or a "blessing" but something that you worked hard for because you kept going even when it seemed hard or impossible. you gave it your everything and now its time to reap. you have been very strong *mentally* your passion is what has lead you here. for some of you, you are going to reap results for what you have been working so long for, or for someone it could be child birth or fertility, and so on. it could be anything tbh. things are progressing and now you'll finally be able to see some visual difference. and whatever it may have been, keep going because thats what you did and that is what will help you. The efforts that you take is the only thing that will help. keep going you guys. your spirit guys are VERY proud of you, YOU GOT THIS. also yes i do see new changes in your routine, perhaps? It is wise to trust your angels and their divine powers to guide you to your true purpose

key words: red feather, sun, new beginnings, ancestor, father, spirit, growth, change, horse, fire, personal changes, discovery, progress future planning, decisions, luck , crows

number 88 & 34

affirmations: I attempt all - not some - possible ways to get unstuck. I refuse to give up because I haven't tried all possible ways. I must know what awaits me at the end of this rope so I do not give up.

love<333 do lmk if it resonates!!

PILE 2

(Cards: knight of pentacles, 1.the magician, 7.chariot, 11.justice, 10 of swords, 2nd house, taurus)

Currently you could be going feeling burdened, low, perhaps a burnout. this could be due to any reason, something is stressing you out and thats why you are behaving the way you are. you might feel unprogressive in a way. nothing is wrong with you, its just a phase and only you can get yourself out of here. firstly you need to analyze and find the root cause of this issue and how you can get out of this, if you need help about it, you will receive it at the right time, in the right way. all you need to do is analyze and then ask for help if you need. its really important for you to find the underlying cause. take your time, no need to hurry, be easy on yourself, once you are done with that make a firm plan to get out of this slow, unprogressive place by a healthier routine and actions that lead you to where you want to be. youll have to be firm and strong. this pile people feel young and maybe even a little naive. if someone has been through a recent breakup you need to be more gentle to yourself, love yourself and take your time to rise. Y'all are being looked after by your guides and passed loved ones.*and its okay if you miss them sometimes, they want you to know they are there for you. always* BE STRONG. YOU WILL GET THROUGH IT. DO NOT WORRY.

key words: values, reconsideration, moving forward, armour, wounds, scars, grounded, guidance, safety, protection, underlying emotions, care, aesthetic

affirmation:This situation works out for my highest good. I press on because I believe in my path. Giving up is easy and always an option so let's delay it for another day.

love<333 do lmk if it resonates

PILE 3

(Cards:4 of cups, 14.temperance, 2.highpreistess, 4.emperor, 17.the star)

your prayers have been answered, but you aren't aware. maybe because of your ego? or maybe some part of you still believes you can't have it. which is totally incorrect because its already here, you just need to have that vision, an open mind, belief. its all here, when you pay close attention to your surrounding you will witness it all unfold. i understand that it can be hard for you to believe but it is ACTUALLY TRUE. you deserve it & it is YOURS. for some others it might not be about that big dream, that goal but about you getting confident. get into you power. c'mon. you need to see your fking worth. its you getting over your ego and being that person. some of yall are glowing up. you guys are working on your self, on building that life even if that is you taking a baby step regularly. you need to see your progress. believe in your self. the magic this universe holds.*just woww* To sum it up: believe in yourself and that you write your own destiny and keep going.

key words: magic, selfcare, hiding, joy, meditation, care, live , sleep, dehydration and hydration, diety work, fae.

affirmatons: I am happy in my own skin and in my own circumstances. i am in complete charge of planning for my future. All my problems have a solution.

love<333 do lmk if it resonates||

#psychic readings #pick a card #tarot community #free readings #pick a pile #tarot reading #tarottribe #tarot tumblr #free tarot #tarot #divination #divineguidance #daily tarot #tarotdaily

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jjunsolos · 1 year

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CHANGE OF PLANS - maybe another time

synopsis - yang yn. a sweet girl who is in love with a man who is, unfortunately, in love with someone else. all yn can do at this point is just hope that they cross paths. and they will… right?

warnings - half written, mentions of food, taehyun kinda realizes his feelings for yn (finally), hana cries a lil. lmk if i missed anything 🙏

wc - 269

prev. | m.list | next.

(authors pov.)

hana swallows down the last bit of muffin that she was eating before turning to taehyun.

“taehyun, are you sure youre okay?” hana asks. taehyun comes back from his thoughts and looks at hana with wide eyes.

since the moment he sat down, hes been spacing out. not really aware of his surroundings.

“yeah im fine. im just thinking about… stuff”

“well im always down to talk. only if you wanna”

taehyun hesitated before speaking.

“how do you know that you have feelings for someone?”

the question caught hana off guard. she blushed a little before speaking.

“well… you tend to think about them. everytime youre around them, you feel all giddy. maybe youll feel a little happy that youre with them. talking to them. and sometimes you might catch yourself looking at them with a fond smile…”

“like the way you look at me” thought hana.

hana was well aware of taehyuns feelings for her. of course she liked him back. she just wanted him to confess first. but ever since yn came into view, taehyuns attention has been on her. this worried hana. she wanted taehyuns attention all to herself. she hated being selfish like this, but its just the way it is.

“oh… maybe i do have feelings for someone” taehyuns says lowly. hana smiles.

is he finally confessing to me?

“hey hana, i gotta go. i remembered i have to do something with soobin. ill text you later, yeah?” taehyun gets up and leaves the cafe. hana watches in disappointment. she sighs as tears fill her eyes.

“please dont leave me for her”

taglist [open] - (bold = couldnt mention)

@itspalaly @forever-in-the-sky2 @wonioml @aestheticsluut @cutesince2000 @taekwondoes @mackjestic @ghostfacefricker6969 @venmntl @ashxxgyu @luvsoobs @captivq @catsyoon @pinkheadflowers @belovedxiao @marekmybeloved @sullystraw @lovekyr @beomfair @thisisnotjacinta @ckline35 @softie00 @strawbrinkofdeath @hawkins-hs @ioszzn

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mariii1 · 1 year

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What Sex Toy Should You Buy? 🤔🙈 18+

Yes fuck what I was gonna do for New Years im only doing unique shit from now onnn kkkkkkkk 🤭

1.okay i think most things would fit you guys and some of you may get aroused easily. On the other hand of the spectrum some of y'all find it hard to cum soo I would suggest to get something thats stronger than average even if you're a beginner. Across the board I'm thinking of a hitachi or just a hardcore wand even if you're sensitive. But definitely one with multiple settings OR you get something like the hitachi with something else and use them at the same time. This could also be about finding better stimulants like even taking aphrodisiacs if ya want (personally for me 🍃=💦) or just better porn. Aka finding ways to get yourself more aroused even if you're sensitive (maybe be learning how to keep yourself going) just wanna put this out there, don't feel bad if you've had experiences where a partner or someone just couldnt make you orgasm, you dont owe them anything. You don't have to mask your displeasure or claim that nothing is ever enough for you just to make others (or internalize shame) to feel better.

2. Aight maybe your deciding rn and/or your looking for one you use with other people. You might also want something that doesn't make u climax right away. Tbh i might not even be able to tell you cuz i think you'll find the perfect one on your own soon enough. Buttt i can give suggestions which is something flashy like those relief controlled vibrating mount or even a dildo machine if you have the funds. Also having a someone else edge you like fr. Using hands to edge someone that's restrained in some way can really draw things out. Anyways good luck 👍✨️

3. Why the fuck am i dealing with tremendous amounts of religious trauma in this pile specifically like what's going on here y'all 😭😭 Y'all the first where purity culture shame really came thruuuu. Anyways, im literally getting for a few a you to heal your relationship with god whether its viewing it differently or cutting it off completely. Im sorry im nagging I literally hate giving advice, but what would really help is figuring out your sexuality (not necessarily sexual orientation) in more depth. Some of you may be ace and are thinking your in the gray area and want to really see and know what your boundaries, and a few of you could do it with a trusted person (probs a partner). Go ahead and put that idea out there if you want, i think the person in mind would recieve that idea well. Some of you want to practice touching other people and thats fine too.

4.I think you're on the mission to find something to tire yourself out with and I wholeheartedly agree with that. Definitely something you can use laying down, no hands if possible. Maybe one of those self thrusting insertable virbators, or just one that will stay in place. I saw an ad for a brand called lelo and they have a lot of insertable vibrators. Maybe also a self thrusting rabbit dildo. Ofc think beyond what i said here this could also be about learning how to turn yourself on more or even learning how to orgasm without touching yourself at all. Its giving pleasure with the least amount of effort possible 👏

5.like a lot of piles i feel like youll find out about this one on your own its most definitely an impulsive purchase. Y'all want to feel tired after and at the same time you're willing to work with what you can afford/find. Maybe you're someone who can get off humping anything. Anyways whatever is within your tax bracket. To make your life harder, I will challenge you to get a more ✨️experimental✨️ type of sex toy, like a fantasy dildo or sleeve or toys that you physically have to ride/thrust into. Have fun and stay safe👍

6. I'm already getting some boujeee ass ppl in here. You should get a sex toy you know other people should be jealous of. I think yall want something that will make you feel highly desirable and sexy. Not classy but attractive u know? Something expensive. I think choosing a type porn or whatever u to get aroused, that makes you feel like a queen. Watching povs that are catered to people with praise kinks, doing things to make you feel like every part of your body is a blessing and miracle. I'm getting for a lot of it might be wearing very expensive latex and leather items, or just unique fetish wear. This could also literally be about partaking in online domming and if you're cool with it, making videos catered to more submissive ppl iykyk. Idk why but i think you would do well with like a remote controlled vibrator or dildo that you can wear underneath clothes (PLEASE be respectful and mindful of public places plzz😭😭) but yeah y'all are hot girls

#pick a card #tarot #queer tarot #pick a pile #pac #tarot reading #love tarot reading #pick a deck #18+ tarot #18+#shygirl #nuxxe

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sygol · 1 year

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heyyyy listen... you need to eat carbohydrates to survive, stop wilting away like a loser. you dont have what it takes to kill yourself, and thats because you were born to live.

-> get outside, -> get in the fucking sun, -> get in the rain, seriously, -> put your phone away, -> get off the computer, -> go into the real world -> acknowledge what is beautiful, what is joyous, -> find it: i promise you its there.

get it: religions, they show their gratitude towards the world in their rituals, because it works. it makes you happy. im not going to start slinging christianity to you LOL, but there are reasons why cults persist: they sell you happiness in a complicated way, people are suckers for that. you can blind the vast majority of people with a carrot on a stick,

but im here today to tell you, you can DIY. skip the cults, skip the bullshit. today, and today now create your very own CARROT ON A STICK, give yourself a quest, seek to leave your zone of comfort, its time to get a little uncomfortable, since youre wasting away anyway, might aswell make that discomfort go to a purpose, go ahead: i'll get you started with some ideas:

in a public place, engage a stranger in conversation, whats the worst that could realistically happen? seriously just go ahead and ask someone if they've had any dreams lately, practice asking yourself in the mirror casually with confidence, thats the only thing you have to practice, the rest will happen naturally.

okay maybe thats not your thing, perhaps try the oldest adage in the book: "take a hike". look, i dont have time to explain this one, it works and thats why it's been said for all of human history.¹

give yourself a reason to quit doing drugs. if youre at the beginning of your drug curve you dont have to take this advice, i know you dont want to but im still going to tell you: that you need to be connecting with yourself and not lying, figure out yourself if you must, but those of you at the end of the curve, get real, thats not cutting it anymore, put it down, trust me, life has a lot of good highs. if youre gonna fucking die you might aswell have a good time on the way out, and hey maybe on that path youll suddenly see that you have a new peak to seek....

⛰️

hahaha time to make some art, time to create something, do something youve never done before, seek out a new friend, fuck, maybe you need a magic spell for that, i don't know, bring whatever ritual into it that you must, but it's important to explore.

the algorithms on your phone are designed to prey on you, they will throw every attack at you that they can, and they will see which ones are successful, and then they will breed those attacks with eachother, they will rip you apart, not in a sexy way, this is the new era of drugs. algorithms and user interface designed to make you addicted. im not telling you not to use them, but acknowledge what those are, whether its a chemical in your brain making your dopamine spike or its a flash on your screen, it'll rot your brain in the same fucking way, i swear to you.

1. hey, i believe some creative liberties were used in this sentence, and do not reflect a truth that is realistically provable, but while youre down here in the foot note section, im going to whisper a secret to you: i love you and the society we live in is made of paper

#t4 #t3

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pluralcultureis · 7 months

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Plural culture is I just dont get it...why do endos want to be this? and why do people think others want or are faking all of this? Plural culture is I cant LIKE anything anymore. Plural culture is even if im ACTIVLY TRYING to not split and to ignore it all and just keep on keeping on and pretend my system isnt there I STILL split. I cant sit down and enjoy my day because my brain will take SOMETHING, ANYTHING, NOT EVEN A PERSON SOMETIMES and if I got enjoyment or even suffering out of it then its just THERE now and a part of me is missing. Plural culture is missing parts of yourself, loosing a skill or talent you loved that shaped who you were, forgetting the faces and voices of your loves ones, getting your memories rewriten for you, blinking and missing days or sometimes years. And thats just MY experience as host! Others in my system having to live their lives in the backseat, never being able to have one of their own or feeling like their hole point of existence is to make me happy or make sure we dont die. Sometimes I see how tired and drained the protectors are, how strung out the care takers are, the gatekeepers putting on a brave face for the good of the system to make us feel like maybe at least ONE of us has SOME kind of control only to find out that even they dont know everything or have control over it all. I see alters who are dating in our system wish and beg for a body just so they can hold hands like normal. Or others still who have had relationships outside the system wish they had a body independent of this one to go and be with who they want and do whatever they want. Its NOT all suffering and disorder yes of course and thats so very valid but like...even the most well adjusted systems deal with flashbacks, triggers, panic attacks I mean for fuck sake its not just some fun game or even a coping skill! Id RATHER NOT split or disassociate to be able to cope! Honestly id MUCH RATHER do things myself then switch but unfortunately I simply CANT no matter how much I want to! I HATE how low our split tolerance is because SPLITTING ISNT FUCKING FUN even when its painless! Even when its so subtle you dont notice! Because you loose something, a memory, your feelings, your sense of self gets rocked off its balance and honestly sometimes not knowing a split happed is WORSE cause youll just randomly start feeling like your not you anymore with no explanation as to why! Its so frustrating to see a bunch of people emulate the "fun parts" of my disorder and then when I get RIGHTFULY upset and say "hey its not like that it actually kinda sucks" they turn around and emotionally manipulate a group of people who are NUTORIOUS for not being believed by saying "Well because no one believes you then you should believe me because everyone has a different brain so actually I say that you dont need to be traumatized and have any of the bad shit your talking about and I get to have all the cool parts of it and your trying to oppress me by not letting me in your spaces" like???? Okay, so sorry for the rant and talking about endos and systemcorse and all. Sometimes it just all seems so ridiculous to me. When I see people say "real systems arnt hurt by people faking DID" and like??? no??? dont fucking speak for me???? Like yes stop fakeclaiming but like no dont say endos arnt "real systems problem" like I guess in practice sure but no and also BIG NO cause enods directly HAVE caused me problems so no, fuck that.

#endos dni #osdd #pdid #did #did system #pdid system #osddid #actually did #traumagenic #actually dissociative #plural culture is #tw vent #syscourse

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askfairyromano · 2 months

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oooh so you come from a long line of flirts, huh? i cant say that i envy you. i can tolerate a lot, but watching my own grandpa woo women left and right would probably send me over the metaphorical edge. are you any good at it, or do you enjoy it? im sure flirting can come in handy at de-escalating some situations, maybe even helping with diplomacy a bit. and youre definitely lovely enough that it would work easily! i wont pretend like i understand anything youve been through, but i do know that its the most important to find joy when you have demons to face. you need something to hold onto on the days when it feels hard, something grounding and steady that you cant find in another person, only yourself, ya know? you are your own closest friend, its important to cultivate and maintain that relationship as much as it is the ones around you. everyone else can change and grow and leave, but you are you for the rest of your life, so its important to have that comfort and love within yourself. make your body a home or however the phrase goes, ya know? as for the eggs! what? are you neerrrrrvoous~? theyre not dragons or anything, they dont bite. i mean they will eventually, but they dont now. theyre just swans, or, ya know, they will be swans. maybe. they should be swans, if the breeder is to be believed. but who knows! lots of shady businesses popping up. guess youll just have to keep them incubated to find out!

(ghjkjh honestly i didnt even consider the idea until you said pigeon eggs lmao. tbh i had no actual plan for them, i just saw the emoji and i was like huh? phones have egg emojis? sure why not lets send that and see where it goes. tbh my plan for them was either toucans or swans, both bc theyre such absurdly fascinated birds that can be such assholes, and having them sitting at romanos side like some weird guard dog makes me giggle. i hope thats okay, really theyre just for fun, so you can play with the idea as much as you want. congrats on passing your exams btw!!! thats amazing!! you must be so relieved!! you deserved the celebration, im so happy for you!!!!)

#I'm gonna see if I can managae to draw birds lmao #my expertise lies... somewhere else I'll say lol #hetalia fairy au #art #hetalia south italy #hws south italy #hetalia romano #hws romano #aph romano #aph south italy #ask answered #hetalia #hws

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feelo-fick · 5 months

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Scarab & Prismo & Snufkin & Muddler for the character bingo!

(doesn’t have to be all of these of course. But can be)

I NEED TO KILL SCARAB. ITS A NEED. I NEED HIS BLOOD (<- will weep at any angst including him). HES EVEYTHING HES HORRIBLE HES A WRETCHED THING I HATE HIM HES THE WORST I WILL KISS HIM. AUGH. what the hell.

anyways i find him relatable.. something something vulnerability hard and shit yada yada but ALSO i make weird squawking/squeaky noises when im annoyed and i like to imagine he does that with the chirping... its funny

ALSO THE FANDOM KEEPS MAKING HIM SUFFER AND I LOVE IT AND WANT MORE BUT ALSO OW FUCK THAT HURTS WHY OW OW OW everything about his - concerning - respect (kneel for your life.) for authority (he was only following orders.) and isolation (he was never invited to those parties.) from the rest of. well everyone (he doesnt need them. he enjoys being alone. he doesnt need anyone else. he doesnt want it, he doesnt want it, he promises he doesnt.) is just SO. augh.

and the self sabotaging aspect of it. no one will love you, youve accepted that, so you stop sanding down your teeth. you bite and claw at any attempt to soothe your aches and stroke your spikes down, theyre only trying to find a soft spot near your belly.

your worst fears come true. youll never let it happen again. youll stand straight, youll make yourself seem bigger to scare off anyone who tries to come close to you. which leads to anyone who couldve helped you being dissuaded and backing off. serves them right, you never needed fixing. you never needed anyone. ...the clycle begins again. it aches. why? it shouldnt. that isnt allowed.

they should stop that, stop poking at the weak spots. it hurts to feel. you KNOW its to help. you dont want to be helped. stop it, stop. everyones going to know. they cant know it aches. theyll use it against you. keep kneeling, head lower, arch your back. maybe theyll be amused enough to give you mercy.

...cough. well anyways. im gonna stop here before this turns into a full on character analysis and MOVE ON TO THE NEXT ONEEEE WOO

(youll start to notice a pattern that i express love for characters by wishing to kill them cough)

ANYWAYS MY SECOND HUSBAAND WHOM I WANT DEAD . hes. hes so. i cant.

i honestly love his aesthetic i dont know why. the tv/light/dream shit has a lot of potential methinks. i love the thought of a job swap au where prismo uses light/tech as a way to interact with the world while still being stuck somewhere else... and also the visual funkiness of him being projected onto many many tv screens brings me joy. i want that gender...

also. in general i love it when gods are depicted ss being really mortal-like... like, youre a cosmic being with power and omnipotence over the multiverses you watch over, and yet. you like sandwiches and pools and games and hanging out wih friends and its just. on every level but literal you are mortal and alive and wholly r e a l. but youre not. youre a dream, a projection, youre not even in the dimensions of the people you (love) watch. youre an outsider and its very clear. youre THIS CLOSE to being just like them. but youre not. and you never will be.

youre admired by those who are like you, but you dont really care for it. but those who you do care about either dont see you as anything more than a tool to manipulate the multiverse or see you as too grand to be able to connect with in a way that isnt "you are god and i am not". youre stuck in a prison you yourself control. but a prison is still a prison. people want what you have- how you wished they had it instead of you! maybe then, youd be loved. maybe then, things wouldnt be so ear-deafingly quiet. silence sticks out like a sore thumb in the yearning- the wish to not be alone.

OKAY AM I JUST GONNA DO THIS FOR ALL OF THEM. WHAT THE HELL. MOVING ON.

okay this time im not gonna intensely analyse his character. hopefully.

AHEM . SNUFKIN!!!! my best friend i love him so so much.......... i need to absorb his fucking vibes and gender so hard what the hell. LIKE BROTHER. HOW DO YOU PULL OFF THAT MUCH SWAGGER WITHOUT EVEN TRYING oh and also there are so many things wrong with you are you like okay bud...

i like to think that "omg hes just like me frfr" but the fact that i get so excited about that thought proves that I actually kin moomintroll nsnxjsjjsj WHICH MAKES SENSE. makes a lot of sense

i love how people interpret his personality... and i love seeing all the potential angst/drama/whatever you call it that could pop up because of how avoindant he is... and his relationships with the other characters... the way he so easily distances himself from others while (i know this isnt about him but once you talk deeply about one of them i suppose you cant leave out the other) moomintroll clings a little too hard onto him...

ill be honest im a bit rusty on anything moomin related, so forgive my poor memory + hesitation, but i do love em a lot still!!! no hyperfixation is dead, just dormant, as they say........... havent thought about them in a while but i should really brush up on everyones characters and the way they interact ... would be really helpful for some analysis and application to my own work and- YEAH WHATEVER YOU GET IT NEXT ONE

OKAY SO I HAVENT HEARD TOO MUCH ABOUT MUDDLER (aside from bloom's stuff - bless you bloom) BUT WHAT I DO KNOW IS THAT HES VERY RELATABLE AND FUNKY AND I LOVE HIM FOR THAT... button collector.... so me fr............

im quite neutral on account of the fact that (again) i havent seen much of him, but i think hes really neato and also(!) i actually used him as inspo for my sona design... ITS JUST THAT, his design fucks so hard so so hard its such a good design. PEAK. absolute peak...

IDK ! i think muddler is such a nice and cool little critter... i would love to have more content of him!!! i need to know more about him!!! honestly atp someone could tag me on muddler content id be happy to have it... i think id really really love him if i just knew more(!!!) but i dont unfortunately waaah..

#TYANKS FOR THE ASK WOOHOO THIS TOOK FOREVER BECAUSE OF THE ANALYSIS BITS HAHAHAHHAHA #woopee! yippee!!!#thanks heather!!?#no question mark***#anyways i wanna answer your prismo and scarab oc projection ask now that im on a roll with this...#huhuhuhu

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