#and if they grow and i'm no longer their audience that's fine but i'm going to miss them and their music dearly

[catskets]

A more in-depth guide for creating visual novels, especially in the horror, horror-romance, etc circles

Some of you have seen my previous, smaller post on crafting visual novels, especially in this little space of Tumblr that a lot of us have found themselves in. Since that post took off, I've wanted to create a longer guide to help touch on some points I've thought about for the past few months.

In case you've never heard of me, I'm Kat, also known as catsket. I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Game Design. I've been making games for nearly 5 years, and I've been doing visual novels more "professionally" for 2. You may know me for Art Without Blood, 10:16, God is in the Radio, or Fatal Focus. I'm here to help you make your first visual novel.

Please note that my advice does not fit everyone, and you may disagree with what I say. That's okay! It doesn't work for all. That's why there's thousands of resources out there.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE NEVER MADE A GAME

So, you have an idea for a huge visual novel. Horror, a shady and obsessive love interest, a little bit of woo-hooing. 100k words. Maybe a million. What is this, the 07th Expansion?

I notice a lot of people getting into visual novels are artists first. That's okay! I wanted to do art for games before I realized how much I enjoyed writing. And even less of you have probably touched Visual Studio. Again, perfectly okay. We all start somewhere.

My number one piece of advice? Make shitty games.

What does that mean?! My recommendation to those who have never done games is to make a bunch of shitty ones. Think of a theme, or hell, even join a game jam, where you make a game that fits a theme in a short amount of time. Spend about a week on your game. Focus on making something polished. Polish your mechanics. Polish your output.

I recommend, if you can, to make at least 4-6, if not more, kind of shitty games before hopping into longer projects. Making a game is a skill, just like art, just like writing. And game development is combining ALL of these together into one big soup being stirred by a skeleton hand puppet. You'll get into the rhythm and see what works for you.

It also helps you learn, perhaps, the second most important thing here: do you even like making games? There are cases out there where people have created video games (not saying visual novels) just for clout. That's no fun for you, that's no fun for your players. And you might go through this process and find that you don't like making games. That's completely okay! It's not for everyone.

Also, you can use these shittier games to gather an audience. I've built my audience because, for the past few years, I've been releasing games that slowly give me growing fields of eyes every day. A success story overnight is a rare one. It takes time. It's like building a brand, but you aren't a brand, you're an artist.

REV UP YOUR ENGINES!

Ren'py is the number one engine you will be recommended. It is very beginner-friendly, with lots of tutorials, assets on itch.io to use and download, and support. The engine comes with a few tutorials in the form of games, whose code you can freely browse. This is the engine I use most often. Most visual novels you see are made in this engine.

Twine is a text-based engine that most people use for interactive fiction. You can add images and audio, though, if you don't mind messing with HTML. I use Twine for text games and for outlining for my larger games. Ever played Degrees of Lewdity? Yeah, I know you have. Don't ask why. That game was made in Twine.

RPG Maker has multiple versions and has been used for exclusively VNs if you don't mind fucking around with plugins. It can definitely give your game a super unique feel. I recommend RPG Maker MV, since it has the most resources. This line of engines usually costs money, but it often goes on sale for under $5-$15.

People will recommend TyranoBuilder, but as a user and player, the lack of options and the format the games often come in is just...not fun to navigate. It advertises itself as little to no code, but it's often evident in the final results. Some good games have been made in it, though, so if you want to use it for prototyping/practice, you can. I'm not a fan, but that doesn't mean that fans don't exist! This engine costs money.

Not an engine, but check out Ink! Super useful scripting language that's used for more professional projects.

DEMOS, DEMOS, DEMOS

You've got an idea for a long-term project, and now you want to show it to the world! But wait, wait, don't do that yet!

When should I start advertising my game? This is a personal opinion, but I say that you should not start advertising your game until 50-60% of your demo is complete. Why? As I've discussed with some fans of indie VNs, they can name quite a few projects that have been in the "working on the demo" age for 1-2+ years. I've been in the Kickstarter MMO circles. If you, making a single-player experience with little mechanics to balance and polish (aka a visual novel), are taking that long on a demo, I am going to assume the game is not coming out. There are some games I have seen out here that have been in "working on the demo" phase where I haven't seen a single ounce of what the project will look like.

What should I put in my demo? The purpose of a demo is to showcase the mechanics and the vibes and the mechanics of your game. It's a demonstration. In my last post, I pointed to the Dead Space 2 demo that was showcased at E3 (RIP), that takes place about 2 hours into the story and shows how enemies are defeated, some animations, bits of the story, etc. Usually, because it's less about mechanics and more about vibes, visual novel demos showcase a certain percentage of the full thing (5-10%.) Can you showcase the vibe of the game here and what players should expect? If not, show off another portion.

How long should I work on my demo? Before, I said 3-4 months. That can be true, that can also not be true. Think about how long the demo takes you in proportion to how long the actual game should take you. Don't put too much effort. The demo is to showcase the vibe. It's to see how much the public and fans may enjoy the game.

My game is 18+, what should I do? Make a splash screen when the game is downloaded to let players know your game is 18+. If it's going to contain sexual content, you can hide it with itch.io's adult content filter. Write it on the page itself that your game is for adults only. Don't put your demo behind a paywall. This is genuinely ridiculous. The purpose of a demo is to showcase what a game is like before a player purchases it. That defeats the point of a demo. I've seen this happen, and it discourages players from approaching, especially because most demos never make it past the demo phase. So...I'm paying you $10 for 2-3k words of a game that may never come out?

Should I make a social media for my game? YES! Go for it. These anchors are how people will find your game. Make a Tumblr and open that ask box. Make a Twitter. Go to BluSky. Advertising is not bad. Some YouTubers even take e-mail suggestions from developers. Feel free to shoot your shot. The worst they can do is not respond.

HOW TO SET UP YOUR ITCH.IO PAGE:

Getting your itch.io to a presentable state can be very challenging! There's many ways to do it. I highly recommend using this page image guide for learning how to size your images to make your page pop!

Itch.io themselves has suggested to not publish a page until the game or demo is released. You can make the page and keep it as a draft, but do not publish it until you're ready!

Your cover image is the image that will appear in the search of the website, on any front pages, in collections, and on your profile. What have I seen that works? Key art of one of the characters up close and the title of the game! If you can make it a .GIF, do it! Bitches love .GIFs!

Itch.io recommends 3-5 screenshots on your page. I recommend 1 of these 5 be a .GIF that shows how gameplay feels. This is effective, even for visual novels!

Write a 3-5 sentence summary about your game for the description. What is your story about? What is the draw?

DO NOT BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO IS GOING TO SAY "This is not like other visual novels. It doesn't have that cheesy this or that or-" No one cares. Genuinely. You're putting down other games in your genre and elevating yourself to the pompous level.

TAG YOUR GAME! itch.io gives you a list of tags to choose from when you go to tag. DON'T USE THIS! Try to go for more specific tags. Arimia has a very good guide on how to use itch.io's tagging system to your advantage.

GENERAL GAME MAKING ADVICE

SCOPE KNIFE IS SUPER USEFUL! Everyone makes games that are way over their workload. It's okay to cut out features and add them later. Prioritize making a finished game before hitting those stretch goals.

PLAN, PLAN, PLAN! Writing outlines is super helpful. I use Twine for my outlines, because you can connect your passages together and make really well-thought webs.

IT'S OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP! Whether it's from friends, professionals, or anything in-between. They can help with assets, editing, etc.

HONE YOUR SKILLS OUTSIDE OF GAMES! Write some poetry. Do some sketches everyday. Improve on your craft to improve your games

MUSIC IS HARD. THERE ARE RESOURCES. Most of us aren't musicians. That's okay. Make sure the music you get for your game is allowed to be used. You can use anything non-commercial if your game will not cost money or donations. I try to do songs in the public domain or free to use overall with credit if I don't have a musician. Consult the Creative Commons website if you're unsure how you're supposed to use a certain piece of music. If you don't use the right stuff, not only can it put you in legal trouble, but it can put streamers in hot water if they play your game and they can't upload the video because music is copyrighted.

PLEASE, DO SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR UI. Wanna know an easy way to get your game to look more professional? Edit the damn UI for your game. Make a new textbox, even if it's just a black box. Change the font. Eventually, players recognize the defaults and patterns of games made in certain engines and may attribute a lack of UI changes to a developer being lazy. It doesn't take very long to change the colors around and move text! Please do it to add a little pop to your game.

DEADLINES ARE AWESOME. Not everyone works well under pressure, but if you give yourself an infinite amount of time to make something, it'll never get done. Set goals for yourself for how much you can work on something.

IF YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP, GIVE UP. Making things is hard, especially long-term. Emergencies happen, jobs happen, life happens. Let your fans know that a project isn't happening anymore. Don't leave them in the dark. You don't need to tell strangers your medical history or anything, but transparency + honesty are really hot traits. You should use those in your creative work. This is one reason why I advocate for not publishing or advertising things until you know it's stable.

SHOWCASING YOUR CONTENT

People love to see WIPs for games! This is what the devlog is good for! A devlog is a post where a developer talks about and showcases some things happening in the game? What can you add to your dev log?

PERCENTAGES! How much of the artwork is done? How much of this character's route is done?

SNEAK PEEKS AT ARTWORK AND SPRITES!

GIFS! GIRLS LOVE GIFS!

Anything else to showcase your game's content! Posting consistent updates retains and even gains a fan's attention for your work.

RUNNING YOUR TUMBLR

You've joined us, and you've made a Tumblr for your blog! Link it on the itch.io page, so people can come find you after playing your awesome demo!

Do I have to respond to every ask? No. It's your blog. Delete whatever asks you want.

I got a hate comment! What do I do? Delete it and move on. I have a more detailed section on hate below.

I want to interact with [blog]! How do I do that? Reach out to the devs for silly little collabs. If you come onto a developer slightly headstrong, they might feel you are being abrasive or using them for content.

If people make fan content, interact with it! Encourage it! Reblog it. Show your love.

OTHER IMPORTANT THINGS

PROFESSIONALISM IS KEY. These may be pet projects, but you want to appear some level of professional on your actual itch.io page.

Being dismissive of player and fan complaints or criticisms will make you appear childish.

If your game is broken, fix it. I have been told by some amateur developers to ignore game-breaking bugs. It does not make me, a player, want to engage with your content. It seems messy and unfinished.

With the above point, it's 100% okay to have bugs and errors upon release. Every developer and their brood mother has. To decrease these issues, get playtesters. Friends can play your games, spot any errors, and help you point out things that can be improved upon. I recommend having playtesters at every stage of development.

Make sure your game runs before you publish it. Please.

You can still be silly and giddy! There's no reason to not be, especially when you get positive comments! The point of this is to not be outright rude to potential players and fans.

IGNORE HATE COMMENTS. In this case, a hate comment is a statement that contains no constructive criticism and are only here to be insulting or malicious. People are going to leave you with actual piles of dog shit in your ask box. They are trying to provoke you. Giving hate comments any attention, even if you're there to "clap back" proves that they got to you, even if you don't take the hate to heart. They will continue to pester you. Delete any hate comments and ignore them completely. Laugh about them with friends in a private setting, sure.

THINK BEFORE YOU REFERENCE! I know one big thing in this community is adding references to other games in yours, such as plushies of other characters or putting them on posters. The best thing you can do it ask the developer before adding this. How would you feel if some random person you've never met put your character in a video game? Most of us would feel weird and potentially violated. Open communication with devs is awesome. I am usually okay with it as long as someone asks for permission.

As a complete aside, I prefer more tasteful references to other games as opposed to 523482346 plushies and posters. These have been slightly overdone. Why not theme a candy after another game's character? Maybe your characters know each other.

OTHER RESOURCES I RECOMMEND

Devtalk is a server dedicated to independent visual novel creators. You can find jobs, resources, advice, talks, and, like, everything there! Devtalk is super useful. Everyone in there is so cool. They have a really great and comprehensive list of resources that I could not even begin to cover.

Visual Novel Design is a great YouTuber. No other words, check the guy out!

Ren'py and whatever other engine you're using has documentation that's super useful to follow.

Arimia not only has amazing VN resources, especially for marketing, but she also just has? Amazing games that you should check out?

And for a shameless self plug, I'm the lead of Sacred Veins, a collective of devs creating narrative games, whether it be horror, humor, romance, or everything in-between. Come hang out with us!

#visual novels #game development

[n0v4t33z]

The Syndicate - Chapter 3: Soft Hearted Criminal

Pairings: Choi San X Female Reader, Park Seonghwa X Female Reader, Ateez X Female Reader

Summary: Y/N is a Detective with a promising future in the police department until she's kidnapped by the infamous mafia boss Choi San and from him, she learns the dark secrets her superior has been hiding the whole time so she teams up with him in order to put a stop to it.

Genre: Lots of angst, Romance, Crime Fiction, Psychological Drama

Word Count: 6k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Language, Graphic Violence, Mentions of Illegal activities (i.e Kidnapping, extortion, assassination etc.), y/n gets roughed up by Wooyoung like twice , Slow Burn, Fluff sometimes, Work In Progress, Non-Idol AU, Mafia AU, Very suggestive at times, y/n cries alot, y/n having inner turmoil, Ateez being bad boys, Wooyoung and Yeosang are a little mean in this story tbh, Guns, Gunshot wounds, Assassination attempt(s) ,mentions death and acts of violence

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

Spotify Playlist🎵 | Series Masterlist📝

Author's Note 💌 : I was supposed to post this in the beginning of August but I ended up getting a little impatient so I'm posting it now lol so I hope you guys enjoy this chapter despite how slow it is, I promise the really good chapters are coming soon! -N

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆.

The next day after mindlessly sitting there bored out of my mind I hear a light knock on the door only to see Seonghwa quietly opening the door. He gives me a small smile and mouths the words “Hey” Funnily enough I’m happy to see a criminal keep his word and not lie for once but it also doesn’t mean that I’m completely fond of the guy. Although I guess I can say so far from what he’s shown me I can mildly trust him enough to want to see him again just so I don’t get bored. “You kept your promise..” He presses his finger on his lips and says in a low voice “I told you I’d be back. I came here for a bit because I wanted to make sure you were okay.” I dryly laugh “Oh wow I- Yeah. I’m alright, a bit sore but I’m fine.” He looks at the ground for a few seconds then his gaze meets mine with a small friendly smile “So I brought you a book, I don’t know if you like to read or not but I thought maybe you’d want something to read while you’re here.” He reaches into his jacket and hands me a book, the title being “Dracula”. A smile grows onto my features admiring the cover of the book and back at Seonghwa “Thank you, I was being driven insane in here not having anything to do.” He lowers his voice “When you’re done just let me know and I can bring you another one.” He glances down at his phone looking at the time then he looks back at me slightly disappointed “I have to go now, I’m sorry it was too fast. Maybe next time I’ll be here a little while longer I don’t want San to-”  There's a sudden knock at the door in which Seonghwa and I look at each other in shock. “Detective-” San enters the room and looks at both of us then back at Seonghwa “Uh? Aren’t you supposed to be out?” Seonghwa hurriedly gets up “Oh yes, my apologies I was just here dropping a book off for the Detective. She seemed bored so I thought maybe she’d like something to read.” He hums and walks over towards Seonghwa gently patting his shoulder “Make sure not to forget about the other person I told you about.” San glances at Seonghwa with a knowing glance. What was that about? Then again I don’t expect them to tell me anything, I am the prisoner here anyway. Seonghwa gets up and nods “No worries I haven’t forgotten I’ll let you know what I find..” Seonghwa looks at me with a half smile and exits the room leaving San and I alone. 

“Good afternoon Detective, are you doing okay?” I shrug “I guess, I’m just sore. Jongho came by earlier this morning to give me some pain killers so I’m okay right now.” San fixes one of his rolled up sleeves. “That’s great to hear that you’re being taken care of.“ I stare at my lap not wanting to meet San’s eyes “It would be nicer if I could be let go.” San chuckles “Sorry Detective, but I can’t. Not until that issue with your superior is fixed” Of course he can’t, his revenge is his priority. “So you’re forcing me to stay just because you say so? What? Do you want me to get to know you or something too?” He shrugs “I don’t know about that, but if I'm being honest I think you know far more about me than I even know about myself.” I scoff ”That’s not true.” San lifts my chin up and looks me in the eye walking up dangerously close in front of me “You think I didn’t read all your reports and the file you have on me? You specifically stated my height and the previous homes that my family and I have lived in, including the ones before my dad became wealthy. Not many people know about my childhood home, the very detailed reports on the crime scenes I’ve been involved in just tells me that you dedicated most of your time investigating me.” Okay, I have a hard copy of his file on hand but I totally forgot I also have one in the database too just in case. Fuck, so that’s how he read it. I turn my face away and grumble ”I’m just doing my job, it’s not because you’re interesting or anything.” He chuckles “i see, well your obsession with me says otherwise.” I snap my head in his direction and raise my eyebrow “Excuse me? My only obsession is to put you in jail.” He smiles and leans in a few inches away from me “If you think you can do it, go for it. From where you’re sitting though I’d like to see you try.” I glare at him and swing my handcuffed fists at him, and without any struggle he catches my fists in mid air with his hand “If you want to hurt me you might want to be a little faster than that.” His gaze going from an amused one to a darker expression. Did I really forget who this man is? Choi San, the man wrecking havoc not only here in Ulwood but in my life as of now. The man who gets to choose what my fate is and here I am trying to hit him. So smart y/n.

I nervously swallow and lower my fists onto my lap “I-I’m sorry.” He lets out an exasperated sigh and runs his hand through his dark hair “How about we start over?” I awkwardly force a smile “Oh, uh okay.” What is wrong with me?! If I piss him off the only way I'm getting out of here is dead. “That doesn’t mean to be awkward, just be yourself.” How am I supposed to be myself when I’m literally in fear of whether or not he’s going to do something to me? Gosh, I’m going to have to just play along. I awkwardly lean back onto the headboard behind me “Fine. Why are you getting so comfortable?” San sits next to me and gives me a dimpled smile “Why not?” I nervously laugh “I mean I’m sorry but seeing you get so comfortable on my bed is just off putting.” I fidget with the chain on my handcuffs feeling the coolness of the metal between my fingers. San responds “You’re right, I guess it is kind of weird for a cop to see the criminal they’re after’s humanity.” The humanity in San? You’d think the man lost that long ago seeing his file. “Yeah, but I guess we can both learn from each other.” I force a smile and continue “So, um, What about your role model? Do you have one?” He glances at me amusingly “Wow detective these questions- Do you usually talk to people like this or?” Unable to cross my arms because of the handcuffs I roll my eyes “You literally kidnapped me, how am I supposed to talk to you like I'm not your whole ass prisoner?” San scoots closer towards me “I make you nervous don’t I?” There he goes again acting like that. “What? No, you just annoy me.” He looks deep into my eyes smirking, my ears and cheeks feeling very warm “ Hm, I don’t? Then why are your cheeks bright red?” He asks with a hint of playfulness in his voice. I thickly swallow and shake my head “No reason, it’s just really warm in here.” He chuckles “Oh, is it?”

 He reaches over and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear “You’re very pretty Detective.” His cat like eyes turn into crescents when he smiles causing my heart to begin to race “Thank you” I respond trying to pass off unaffected by his charm but utterly failing. He gently brushes his fingers against the bruise left on my cheek making me slightly pull away. He gives me a slightly sad expression and sighs “I wish things would have turned out different and I didn’t have to resort to this type of thing.” Nervously I reach over to gently set my hand on his forearm, as annoying as he is now's my chance. “You know you can stop this right? Just let me go and I will see everything you need to be taken care of will happen, I’ll make sure to have the charges against you dropped.” He looks down at my hand holding his arm then looks back at me “No, I just wish it wasn’t you who has to go through this but unfortunately your partner wasn’t enough to bring Lee's attention or it would have been him who would have been taken.” I blink slightly taken aback and he continues “So, I’m sorry Detective. I just have to do this for my father because as an answer to your question from earlier, my father is my role model.. I know he probably wouldn’t have agreed with how I’m handling it but to me it’s what makes sense considering that bastard’s lack of loyalty towards my father. ” He’s crazy, but unfortunately I understand where he’s coming from. “I get it, but don’t you think he’ll be humiliated even more if he gets arrested? I’d like to add that in prison he’ll be a constant target because he’s a former cop.” San smiles “I’ll think about it” He’s lying, he’s just trying to change the subject. 

“You know, I don’t know you on a personal level despite how much I know about you on file but what I do know is right now your hand is being forced. I know you don’t want to do any of this.” Maybe playing good cop as much as I can will help. He looks at the ground almost like he’s lost in thought “Yeah, something like that but not quite.” I lean in a little closer in hopes he hears me a little better “So tell me, is the Choi San you show the world the same one at home with his family, or is he different?” He glances up at me meeting my eyes “Actually, he’s different. I’ll go as far to admit that I have several versions of myself. How the world around me sees me, how my family and those closest to me see me, and lastly how I truly am.” I’m not surprised but that’s honestly sad. He probably had big shoes to fill when he took over for his father. “I see, so who is the true Choi San then? Is he kind?” Let’s see if I can get him to open up a little more. He nods “He is actually. I’m just normal, I’m nothing special. I only took over because I had to, Wooyoung suggested it would be good for my character since he thought I was too nice sometimes. Unfortunately after I took over I was not only under my family’s pressure but also under our allies’ pressure to continue to be just as equally harsh if not more than my father. I knew from the moment I took over that handling things peacefully was no longer an option out fear that my lack of experience would make them think they could just walk all over me.” I can tell he’s holding back, he doesn’t want to just say it. I can see why it would be hard for him to admit. “So what you’re saying is that the reason your crimes are so violent and harsh is because you’re under inmense pressure by the people who surround you to be more like your father, not because you want to right?” Gosh, I just feel so bad for him. That must be a heavy burden to carry all by himself. “Yes, kind of.” I press my lips into a smile “Well, just know you can always talk to me as long as I’m here. I’ll listen to you, I know it seems ironic with me being a cop and all but I guess since I’m here it doesn’t really count since I can’t really do anything..” He reaches over and removes my handcuffs “You’re right, you’re just a normal girl behind that detective facade you put up.” I get up and stretch my arms and legs “And you’re a regular guy hiding behind the mask of an evil mafia kingpin” He smirks “You’re very poetic Detective.” 

He reaches over for my hand and pulls me to sit down again only he doesn’t let go of my hand and just holds it “You know, I don’t think I was supposed to you all of that.” I shake my head “Don’t worry, I’m not going to use anything against you if that’s what you’re thinking.” He lets go of my hand and slightly narrows his eyes “Okay, so how do you do it?” I furrow my brows “Uh, what do you mean? Do what?” Is he catching on? Oh gosh “You know, get people to feel so comfortable around you. Is that a cop technique or something?” It's not what I thought he was going to ask but what a relief. “Honestly I just treat people like humans, that’s it there's really no trick there.” From the corner of my eyes I notice him intently watching me and as much as I don't want to admit this, looking at his general direction is making me really shy, I feel like I shouldn't be looking at him "You are very sweet considering the type of situation you're in." I dryly laugh "You know being mean won't do me any favors and the last thing I want is for me to have to deal with Wooyoung or worse, a pissed off San. So I'd rather not." He chuckles, why is he looking at me like that? He's supposed to be my enemy why is it making me feel this way. “ Didn't you just now try to beat me with your fists and you say I'm the scary one?" I roll my eyes playfully while gently patting his shoulder "Yeah, well I'm not the criminal here sir." He blinks " What? So am I really that scary?” I nod letting out a nervous laugh “Yeah, most of my colleagues would always tell me how they’d be terrified if they ever had to face you.” San’s tongue touches the inside of his cheek looking a bit satisfied “Ah, so does that include you?” I press my lips into a straight line and I shrug “As long as you’re not pissed.” He gives me a dimpled smile and reaches over to pat my head “You don’t need to worry about that then, I really like talking to you so I doubt you’ll ever piss me off enough for me to react like that.” So as long as I’m good or Captain Lee doesn’t fuck everything up then I should be good. Stay on his good side. He lays down patting next to him “Lay with me” I thickly swallow “Um, may I ask why?” He pulls my hand enough to lay me down next to him “No reason, I’ve just heard people have really nice conversations like this.” He glances at me from the corner of his eye “I promise nothing will happen, I won’t touch you if that’s what you’re wondering. I just want to be San for a bit and have a conversation with someone.” I nod “Okay, fair enough” I lay back and turn to him only to realize he was already looking at me a little different than when we first met. Almost like his gaze soften up. I’m hoping being nice to him keeps me in good graces with him so that I can eventually leave this place.

So I think it’s been a month or so since at this point I’ve lost my sense of time. San, Jongho, and Seonghwa are mostly the people I talk to, especially San. He comes in at least a few times everyday to talk and hang out. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that some dark twisted part of me actually thinks he’s kind of cute or at least his more human side of him. Everyone else still kind of scares me especially Wooyoung so I barely say anything to the rest of them and usually staying silent when they enter the room. I'd also be lying if I didn't admit San and I started flirting a little? Okay, more like banter but it leads to the same thing, feelings. Although I'm still not sure if he actually means it or if he's just messing with me to get me to open up. Knowing him, I won't be surprised if he pulls a fast one on me because of his reputation and is just messing with me because he thinks it's a joke.

I sit in bed and I look at the empty dark gray wall grumbling under my breath “I have no idea what’s happening, I just want to leave. It’s been like a month and I already feel like I'm losing it being stuck in here.” I hug myself and bury my face in my knees and I silently begin to tear up from the overwhelming feeling of being homesick. I hate Captain Lee for being so selfish, I’m the one having to go through so much from almost getting my chest caved in to being threatened while he’s back at the station thinking that he’s lucky not having to be in my position and having the whole police force protect him. I really hope he makes the right decision or I won't forgive him for it.

About an hour goes by of me on and off crying ends up with me laying down silently staring at the door until I hear the door unlock. I expected someone else other than San but to my pleasant surprise it was him. Right as he comes in I notice how eerily silent he was, did something happen? HE 's acting quite different than normal. He sets down the food and sits next to me “Hey, I talked to Lee on the phone earlier but I have bad news.” He uncuffs me and holds both my hands giving me an expression with sadness in his eyes, seeing his face like that made my stomach drop. This is not going to be good. He lets out a long sigh and says “He isn’t going to expose himself and he’d rather have you turn up dead than renounce.” I feel nauseous.

I fucking knew it. I ball up my fists and instantaneously my eyes well up with tears making my vision blurry. I get up beginning to pace back and forth, my body feeling like I needed to walk out the anxiousness and anger “That fucking bastard… Now I have to die all because he wants to keep his dirty work under wraps.” I slam my fists onto the surprisingly hard wall completely ignoring the wave of pain going through my hands and wrists. “He fucking promised to get me out of here!!” I turn my back to the wall and slowly fall to the floor crying my eyes out. San walks over to me and sits on the floor next to me and holds my hand gently stroking my shoulder "Look, you’re not going to die." He pauses for a bit almost like he was gathering his thoughts a little. "We’ll make him think you are but you’ll be okay I promise.” I look at San with my eyes still glistening from my tears “What caused you to change your mind about me dying?” He shrugs then lifts up my hand up to his lips and gently kisses my hand. “ Well I was never intending to kill you. I was thinking and I came to the conclusion that yes, I could have easily killed you but those eyes of yours-" He pauses again almost like he was psyching himself up to finish the sentence he started "Those eyes, they made me so weak that evreytime you look at me it makes me really nervous. Almost like if I couldn’t see them anymore I wouldn’t forgive myself." He reaches over and gently squeezes my thigh "Besides, every time I’d come over and hang out with you I'd leave feeling so happy. So happy, that for those few hours I'm with you everything seems perfect.”

My heart isn’t beating faster, my heart isn’t beating faster, I swear it isn’t, I need to get ahold of myself. I look over at his perfectly chiseled face and I notice something I never really did before and it was that gaze that gave away exactly how he felt, the way his gaze lovingly connected to mine without hesitation made my heart race like I ran a marathon. I wrap any arms around San’s waist while I rest my head on his chest “Thank you, I promise to help avenge your father’s death and I'll also make sure to give you back what belongs to you. I owe you.” He looks down at me, pushes a few strands of hair behind my ear and gently strokes my cheek “No, you don’t owe me anything. The last thing I want is for you to think you do. I just don't want you to get hurt because of me.” I shake my head and I grab San’s hand “Look, I was wrong about you. I admit in the beginning I hated you, then after you told me what happened with your dad I sympathized with you but now that it’s been like a month since I’ve been here and that I've gotten to know you a lot more, I admire you. Even if I’m still scared of the type of job you have I've realized we’re not that different, we both have dangerous jobs and for the both of us we both lost someone due to tragedy. You, your dad and me, my grandfather.” I gently stroke San’s hand with my thumb.

“I know that deep down you’re not evil, you’re just working with what life has given you and I won’t judge you for it. I just want to let you know that I'll be here to help, I won’t just stand here and let Captain Lee get away with everything he’s done and not be punished for his actions. Nothing is going to happen to me, if anything now you’ll have knowledge on the police and their tactics and I know for a fact you won’t turn that down.” I give San a small smile then he looks at me and gently rubs his thumb on my cheek “Hm, you’re right I can’t turn that down but I also have something I want to ask you that I hope you don’t turn down either.” Is he going to let me leave? Maybe he feels bad now? “Yes, of course what is it?” San looks deeply into my eyes for a few seconds without saying anything, and slowly he gently tilts my head to look up at him. “Will you be mine?”

Hey, what? Woah. I mean I like him. But should I do it? Will being with him help me or will it seal my fate? Does that mean I can come and go as I please? Maybe that'll help me be trusted a lot more. It's the only chance I've got now. I nod and gently kiss his hand while I hold his hand onto my face “I would love to.” He slowly leans in to kiss me then he pulls back and gently caresses my bottom lip with his thumb “People like me aren’t supposed to have someone like you, someone so caring and understanding. So I never thought I’d be lucky enough to have someone like you.” It actually happened. Me, a former detective is now dating the Boss of the mob group I used to investigate. What a weird turn of events. I can't be too vulnerable though, despite how I'm feeling at the moment I have to remember all his crimes and that with one false move I could end up with them, another name added to the list of corpses Choi San has accumulated on his file. So as twisted as this is it may work in my favor so I can escape.

I lovingly stare into his beautiful dark eyes “I honestly never thought we’d end up together either, but here you are confessing to me. It seems so surreal.” For a few minutes we sit there in silence in each other's arms until San’s radio goes off with Yeosang saying “San, Ito’s replacement is here he wants to talk.” He slightly rolls his eyes in frustration and presses the button on his radio and says “I’ll be there in a bit.” He gets up and then helps me up and sits me down on the bed then he says “I have to go, but I trust you okay? No more handcuffs.” He kisses my forehead and walks over to the door closing the door behind him. Once he's gone I look at my hands and smile “I’m free.” The next step is to make Steven Lee regret he ever threw me under the bus like that, my mother and all my loved ones will suffer over the loss of Detective Y/N but it won't be in vain. I’d rather have everyone I love think I’m dead than for them to know and live with the guilt of knowing that I no longer serve The System. Jongho, Wooyoung, Seonghwa, and San were right. Criminals do have their own reasons as to why they do the things they do. Sadly the easiest and most satisfying way to solve problems is not always the correct way.

“Hey, angel eyes get dressed you’re going to be properly introduced to everyone, the thing is though they don’t know we’re together yet. We have to wait a little longer for that. I just don’t want them to think anything that’s not true.” He walks up to me and hands me a shopping bag full of clothes. “Don’t worry, I understand. You don’t want them to assume we fucked and that’s why I was left alive.” I get up and I walk towards the bathroom, slightly flustered he pushes his glasses up with his middle finger “Uh yeah, that and I kind of never told them that I wasn't ever planning on killing you mostly because I knew there was going to be issues and no one would want to cooperate properly.” I shrug and open the door to the bathroom “Kinda fucked up but, fair enough.” I wonder how much he keeps from them, how much of a front he puts up around them. It's kind of sad now that I think about it. The poor man can never fully be himself and only carefully curated versions of him to help fit a narrative of his choice.

A few minutes later I step out of the bathroom in an all black ensemble some black jeans, a nice plain black top, a leather jacket, and my black high heeled pumps. “You know I look a little dead with these eye bags under my eyes” San walks up to me pulls me close and gently kisses my forehead “You look beautiful to me, angel eyes." He pushes a few strands of hair behind my ear and continues "Besides meeting the guys today we’re also going to go over how we’re going to help you fake your death.” I fix San’s collar holding back a huge smile. “Alright, sounds like a plan.”

San and I walk down the hallway in to a huge conference room except it was more chaotic, maps, notes, and a bunch of other papers sprawled out across the big table. There were also pictures of dozens of people presumably enemies and other rival mafia members. While I look at the pictures a few in particular catch my eye. That’s me, that’s me leaving the station with Chris a week before I was abducted. They followed me everywhere and I had no idea. How did I not notice? Whoever took those pictures was so close, kind of creepy.

I notice all seven of the members in San’s inner circle were here. I’d be lying if I say I'm not scared, because any screw up and I could seriously end up dead in a trash bin. They're all very intimidating just like San himself. San clears his throat “So, i’m sure you guys know the Detective and I've brought her here today because from now on she’s going to be working for me.” Wooyoung and Yeosang give San a surprised face mixed with disappointment. Wooyoung shifts his gaze towards me and glares at me coldly “Why? We literally kidnapped her a month ago. I don’t even think we should even be trusting a cop especially after what happened.” San raises his hand to quiet down Wooyoung and says “You’re right, but Seonghwa, Jongho, Hongjoong and myself have talked to her and she’s reliable. Not to mention she now has a personal vendetta against Lee, so she’s definitely on our side now.” Mingi then says “Okay, what can she do? How does she serve us any purpose besides a pretty face? I know she’s a cop and all but if I'm being honest cops haven’t been very impressive these days and neither was she when we kidnapped her.” Before San could talk I say “Well, besides a pretty face I was trained in both long and short range shooting, and I have a few access codes and I know my way around the police databases. Oh, and about you being able to abduct me In my defense my little detective brain short circuited.” San looks over at Mingi who looked slightly annoyed at the sarcasm tinged answer “There you go questions answered, anyone else?” Everyone stays silent then San smiles “Alright good, so please treat her well she’s one of us now."

Wooyoung whispers something into Yeosang's ear while San continues "Okay, now we’re going to be discussing how we’re going to fake the Detective’s death.” Hongjoong says “You’re really going the extra mile with that aren’t you? Can't she just pass off as a missing person?” San shakes his head “No, because if she does that the police will still consider her alive thus bringing a lot more attention to her trying to find her and since she works for us now we can’t have that. We need to get a little more creative.” After a few hours of careful and meticulous planning a way to fake my death we come up with a solution but it wasn’t one I was too comfortable with and it was taking someone that closely resembles me, remove any identifying features, burn them until they’re unrecognizable, switch my dental records with the deceased and plant my police badge on the body. Sounds easy but unfortunately I know it's not going to be, for anyone, not for the person in place of me, the Aurora syndicate's goons, and myself included. Being on the dark side of justice is not easy, but I owe San for letting me live and I need to teach Captain Lee a lesson for betraying his oath to protect and serve his department. Not to mention he let one of his own to "die" in order to save himself the embarrassment of having to resign as a traitor. Most call it revenge but I call it making it even.

After the meeting, San goes over to his office to get things in order for the plan leaving me to hang out with Seonghwa at the lounge downstairs. “So, you’re staying here?” Seonghwa asks while he takes a sip of some tea that he prepared. I shrug and cross my arms in front of my chest “Yeah San kind of changed his mind after he told me that Captain Lee was going to refuse to come clean. I felt so hurt that I basically told him that Captain Lee and the department were dead to me.” He slowly stirs his tea then he says “Wow so you’re willing to drop your department just like that? Just so you know you won’t ever have to worry about us betraying you, we’re like a family here. Although it’s still a bit off putting having you not be in total isolation and not being in handcuffs.” I rest my head on the lounge's couch arm rest while drawing shapes on it out of habit " Well yeah, I kind of have to at this point. My decision tells you a lot about me. I drop traitors like that with no remorse.”

Seonghwa and I chuckle until I hear footsteps and notice a tall dark haired male extend his hand in my direction “Hello Detective y/ln, sorry for interrupting. I just wanted to introduce myself. I’m Yunho by the way, we didn’t meet properly prior to the meeting earlier but it’s very nice meeting you.” I shake his hand examining the very tall man before me from the meeting earlier but it’s very nice meeting you.” I shake his hand examining the very tall man before me. He definitely didn’t look like the type of person to be involved in things like this so to say that I’m shocked is an understatement. “Thank you, It’s very nice meeting you too.” He pulls up a chair and sits in front us then says “Detective, did you know that you’re all over the news? They still think Lee is trying to find you, I’m sure they haven’t told the press the whole story yet.” Feeling my hands get cold I tuck my hands under my thighs “Yeah, I don't think they ever will but just wait until they find “my dead body” I’m sure Captain Lee is going to make up some stupid excuse as to why I ended up dead” Seonghwa furrows his eyebrows “So are you going to go completely incognito and leave your past life behind?”

I let out a long sigh and look at the fake Monet painting behind Seonghwa, and with an expressionless face I respond “Yeah, I have to. I’d rather have my family think I died not being a horrible person than know I gave in to the temptation of taking matters into my own hands. without the assistance of the law.” Yunho looks at me with a saddened and serious expression clouding over his features “You’re a former cop we all understand, I’m sure your family never expected this from you. Sometimes to protect what we love the most we have to hide the truth.” I lower my gaze and i nod “Yeah, which is also why I think it’s best you guys call me just y/n since I'm no longer a detective.” They both nod then sipping on his tea carefully Seonghwa says “If that makes you comfortable then go ahead. Don’t worry.” He reaches over to me with his free hand and pats my head continuing his thought "It's also really nice just having you with us." Yunho gives me a warm smile and adds onto Seonghwa's sentiment "Thank you for choosing not to go against us, we really do need your kind of help especially with San's goal of getting rid of Lee. It'll be a nightmare that'll soon end." I press my lips into a small smile "Any person who's got the same enemy in common as I is considered an ally in my book despite the initial differences." Seonghwa nods "I'm glad to know we can count on you, despite how some people might feel about it." Is he referring about the rest of the guys? More specifically Wooyoung? "It's fine, I understand where that fear of them trusting a cop comes from. I'll do my best to show them they can trust me." I'll probably look like a fool trying though, they seem like a very tough crowd to please.

Seonghwa, and Yunho decide to take me downstairs to the basement where Hongjoong was, the same place I was taken to talk to Captain Lee. As expected, as soon as he sees Yunho, Seonghwa and I he groans “What are you guys doing here?” Both Yunho and Seonghwa look at each other then Seonghwa replies with “We figured we’d bring Y/N to come help you with the police databases, Me and Yunho were talking to Y/N how it’s nice to have someone so versatile with us.” Hongjoong stares at me for a few seconds then says “Okay fine, but she can’t touch a computer yet until she proves herself.” I smile and raise my right hand and say “I will after my funeral ceremony I promise.” His eyebrow slightly raises and he says “Don’t promise anything, actions speak louder than words.” Seonghwa gently squeezes Hongjoong’s shoulder and says in a low voice “Come on, San doesn’t just trust anyone remember that.” Hongjoong rolls his eyes and groans “Right.” Seonghwa looks over at me and says in a very stern tone “Please, don’t betray our trust.” He then gives me a half hearted smile and leaves with Yunho leaving me with this grouchy computer genius.

Hongjoong pulls a chair over next to him and pats it “Sit, I need you to guide me with some passcodes, just use my laptop at least there I can keep track of everything you do.” He pulls his laptop out of his backpack and passes me a laptop heavily covered in stickers. A small smile grows onto my features “You like Spongebob too huh?” Concentrated into his work and not removing his focused gaze from the screen he says “Huh? Yeah why?" I shrug opening the laptop “Just asking, I like that show too.” Too weary to continue the conversation he says “Cool.” I slightly roll my eyes. Okay Rude. I begin to work on accessing all the police databases and private records. A few minutes later I successfully finish and I tap Hongjoong’s shoulder “I’m done.” He looks at the screen then at me and clicks his tongue “Oh, wow. Thank you Detective.” I smile “No problem, and just call me y/n. I’m technically not a detective anymore.” He smiles and nods “Okay, I’ll keep that noted, do you mind if I see this?” I nod and he takes the laptop from in front of me. For several minutes I see him reading and looking very concentrated reading whatever he searched up. I suddenly hear the door opening and when I look up I realize It’s Mingi and Wooyoung, neither looked too pleased to see me.

I sigh knowing there was a slight tension not just with Wooyoung and Mingi. I tried to not think about that feeling of self awareness that I was in a building full of people who can just as easily take my life just as easily as they spared it. Don’t get me wrong I like San, but no doubt he still scares me when I remember all the crimes he’s committed. The detective in me doesn’t seem to want to die. “We got the girl Hongjoong, is San done?” My stomach drops as soon as I heard Wooyoung say it in such a nonchalant way. I sit there still unable to process the fact that this will be the first crime I’ll be committing not directly but It doesn’t feel right especially knowing an innocent woman has to suffer, but despite that my I still feel very strongly at getting Captain Lee back, not just that but this is the life I willingly accepted when I accepted to be San’s girlfriend and vowed to get back at that old coward even if it's only temporary.

Still preoccupied, Hongjoong shakes his head and says “No, still up there but I’ll tell him when he’s done. You go ahead and handle that woman, keep her quiet.” Wooyoung and Mingi leave their backpacks on the floor then both walk back upstairs while they talk amongst eachother. I really don’t want to know what’s going to happen to that girl before they probably kill her. No doubt she’ll be receiving the same treatment from Wooyoung as I did when I first got here. It luckily ended early but I don't think I would have survived if I had the full experience. Hongjoong nudges my arm and I’m immediately brought back to reality. I turn to him completely playing off that I wasn’t just sitting there in shock “Hey, these files of all the police reports that Lee did back when he started out are behind an access code do you know it? I sit there for a minute trying to remember it then quickly type the access code in the little white box. Once access was granted Hongjoong takes his laptop back and looks like he’s reading through some stuff. The rest of the time I was there I was sorting out all the files we seized from the server with Hongjoong while my brain in the background kept replaying Wooyoung's "little mistake" as he likes to call it. Seeing Wooyoung so nonchalant about this whole situation knowing he's going to kill that poor girl just unsettles me. Reliving every. Single. Blow. Over. And. Over.

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆.

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#ateez series #ateez imagines #ateez x reader #choi san x reader #park seonghwa x reader #ateez fanfiction #ateez angst #mafia au #choi jongho #jeong yunho x reader #jung wooyoung #song mingi #kang yeosang #kim hongjoong x reader #kpop imagines #Fic: The Syndicate #non idol au

[inevitablysomber-dark]

hi luv, i have a request

reader gets badly hurt by rafe or put in danger because of his addiction. that’s like her last straw and she tells rafe she cant be with him if he keeps using. he begs n pleads but reader needs space

over a few days rafe acts crazy, sending her messages n shit saying how he’s gonna make it right bc he “loves” her. reader ignores him for a bit and then once she is ready, goes over to his to talk to him abt the relationship. when she gets there though she overhears rafe talking shit about how reader is the bad person for leaving him + invalidating the severity of the danger he put her in + is literally high on coke while going on this rant

she tells him off, he doesn’t let her leave, idk abt the rest i just see a lot of angst and possessive rafe💌

Of Bullets and Wounds:

Warning: There are some intense, nonconsensual sexual themes in this story, also domestic abuse, and injury. MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. MINORS DNI.

Thoughts and Opinions are Welcome

You didn't understand how you let things get this severe or allowed Rafe to push things as far as he did despite your reluctance.

You probably figured things always worked out and you would be fine.

Unfortunately, that kind of thinking had you keeled over in immeasurable pain and panic as you held on to your injured arm for dear life.

Due to some incident that Topper had with JJ, Rafe, and his little trio, and had recently stumbled upon a firearm, courtesy of Barry. You didn't understand what happened, but something told you Topper had started it.

You couldn't say that to Rafe because admitting the pogues were anything, but guilty would ruin his little fantasy of them being the bad guys.

He lured you out of the comfort of your room for a date night, and somehow you ended up at the beach with the dream team, high and impulsive while playfully handling a dangerous firearm.

You were tired, you had been tired for a while now, and at this point in your lives, you were wondering when Rafe was going to grow the fuck up.

You sat beside a makeshift bonfire as they tampered with the weapon, mostly Rafe, consistently telling them that this was a bad idea and that maybe they should put the gun away and go home.

In fact, your statement made Rafe a bit more rebellious, and he seemed to get a bit more reckless with it.

Shooting out rounds to the ocean, laughing and trying to reassure you. You weren't having fun, not that the night had been a gaggle of laughs, but when the pit of your stomach began to churn, you felt that you needed to get out of the situation as soon as possible.

Rafe noticed as you got up and began to gather your things, and in his hurry to stop you, a bullet shot off in your direction.

Rafe had shot you.

It wasn't on purpose, but you couldn't help but think you wouldn't be in this situation if he had listened to you from the beginning.

The pain was unbearable, and it was all you could focus on as he carried you to the jeep and had Topper drive you out to the hospital.

"Let me see," he says

"Don't touch me," you cringe on the other end of the backseat, doing your best to get as far away from him as possible.

"Baby, I'm so sorry, but please let me see it," he begs.

You desperately shake your head. "No,"

"Just let me fucking see it," he was no longer gentle, and as his patience wore thin, he grabbed your injured arm and taking a look at the wound.

"It hurts," you start hitting him, hoping it would get him to stop pulling on your arm.

But that makes him angrier, as he takes hold of your neck, threatening you with a squeeze. "Stay fucking still," he growls.

You stop, the fear in your belly was spreading to your chest. He goes into his back pocket and pulls out his phone, turning on the flash to get a better view of your injury.

"It looks like a graze," he says.

You take a peek at the open wound, the skin ripped open as blood seeped out, but it didn't look like a hole.

"You're gonna tell them we were playing around at the beach, and you fell on a bunch of rocks."

You're taken aback as the lie flows effortlessly through his lips.

Once you get to the hospital, you tell them precisely what Rafe told you, and you feel like an idiot. He was by your side the entire time, acting as moral support while you got your stitches.

Topper took you back to the beach to pick up Rafe's truck, and Rafe took you home.

Before he can turn off his truck, you let it all go.

"I don't think this is working," you stare at your hands to avoid looking him in the eyes.

"What?" his voice deep and clear. He must be off his high.

"I'm not saying it should be forever, but I think we should take a long break," if you were being honest, you'd been thinking about it for a while and didn't think you'd ever return.

"Y-"

Before he could finish his statement, you jumped out of the truck, rushing to your front door.

"Wait!" he shouts, grabbing your injured arm.

You let out a strangled cry, emphasizing your pain.

"Look, if it's about the whole gun thing, I said I was sorry."

He didn't get it, and frankly, you weren't surprised. Rafe was incapable of thinking about any perspectives outside of his own.

"It's not just the gun, Rafe. It's the fact that every time you get high, you find trouble, and somehow I get dragged along for the ride. It was fun when we first started dating, but now I'm scared and tired." you heave a heavy sigh getting everything off your chest.

"Look, I promise to be better, just don't do this," he whispers, sounding desperate.

"No, we can't be together if you're going to keep using and acting out like this."

"Please"

"We're adults now, Rafe," you open your door.

"Please don't do this to us," he tries to push his way in, and despite going up against his strength, you manage to hold your own.

"Look, I just need some space, I'll see you later,"

Despite the struggle, you lock the door before pushing your back against it.

"What the fuck."

You really didn't want to see Rafe ever again. The night at the beach put things into perspective as you considered him a future partner.

In conclusion, he was very unfit.

Unfortunately, Rafe didn't seem to understand the concept of 'space' since that night. Either that, or he didn't respect you enough to give it to you.

He was constantly messaging you with love bombs, and I'm sorry's, With the last message alluding to him making things right and you effectively having him blocked since.

But that didn't stop Rafe.

He delivered flowers and chocolates to your home, even getting your mother to talk to you about how good your relationship was and that you shouldn't destroy it over a little spat.

He clearly didn't tell her what happened, and you had half a mind to expose his sorry ass.

You let the situation stew for about two weeks before finally deciding to talk to him.

You unblock him and ask to meet up, and he responds by saying anytime and that you knew where to find him.

As you walk up the steps to his mansion, you hear someone making noise by the pool in the backyard and decide to check it out.

When you get closer, you hear your name on what sounds like Rafe's lips.

"She's being such a bitch about the whole thing. It was a fucking accident. She's acting like I held the gun to her fucking face and pulled the trigger on purpose,"

When you look over, he's moving back and forth on the pool's edge, gun in hand, with agitated movements. He was very animated with the occasional tick, and as soon as you heard him sniffle and go to wipe his nose, you knew he was still using.

This bastard and his audacity, before you could walk away, he spots you calling out your name and quickly hanging up with whoever he had on the line.

"What that was-" as soon as he grabs your arm, you push him off and decide to face the Devil.

"Fuck you, Rafe. You're gonna grow to be a miserable old man, stuck to this fucking island, except you won't have daddy's money to ease the pain."

You get in his face, anger slowly building in your chest as you get louder.

"What's worse is that you won't be a kook. No, you'll live on the cut just like the pogues you hate so fucking much, you miserable cokehead,"

You huff as you try to walk away, but he grabs your waist.

"Where the fuck are you going?" he says, irritation laced in his tone.

"I'm going home, let go," you try to push him off, but his hold gets tighter.

"You're not going anywhere,"

You feel a cold heavy metal pushed up against your neck, and still.

"That's my good girl," he says, pulling you into the house and throwing you on the couch, with the gun still in his hand and facing your direction.

"Rafe-"

"No, I gave you the space you needed, you're done, and you're coming back to me." he sits next to you, gun still pointed your way. "Babe, you don't understand just how much I need you in my life. You can't just walk away from me."

He tries to pull you into a kiss, and in the midst of you pushing him away, he clumsily drops the gun.

Feeling a chance come up, you rush for it, but Rafe is faster and stronger as he slams you against the couch.

Your lungs struggle to breathe at the impact, and he takes this opportunity to lift your skirt and rip off your thong.

Pushing his fingers deep into your cunt, roughly fondling you as you try to fight back.

"Rafe, Stop. Please,"

He chuckles as if he thought of something funny. He flips you over without so much of a struggle on his end.

You hear his movement as he adjusts his shorts to pull his cock out.

He massages your ass, giving it a harsh smack. "This is all mine," he gives it another one. "Don't you ever forget that,"

He pulls your cheeks apart as wide as you can handle, and you feel the head of his cock poking into your entrance.

He feels so much larger as your pussy stretches around him. A thought then occurs to you.

"Condom," you say

"Don't worry about that. I wanna be the only thing on your mind," he quickly forces the rest of his cock inside you.

All it takes is a few pumps for him to catch a rhythm, hovering over you as he rolls your clit between his fingers.

You were so wet and didn't understand why. But Rafe didn't care, his enjoyment of the situation evident as his grunts became rabid.

"Fuck" he says as he flips you around so that you're facing him. Pushing himself back into your body. Exhausted by the situation, you just let it happen and let your eyes close as you felt the sensations.

" Look at me," he says. "I wanna see your face when I cum inside you,"

Your eyes open at his suggestion.

"Rafe, no!" you put your hands against his pelvis as you try to push him off. He just grabs them and pulls them over your head as he fucked you with more vigor than before. His other hand plays with your clit as you're forced into an orgasm, toes curled and back arched, with him following close behind. Filling you with his seed, a creampie forms as you feel it leaking out.

"You're gonna be stuck with me forever, bitch."

#Dark!Rafe Cameron #Dark!Rafe Cameron x Reader #Dark OBX #dark fics #Rafe Cameron c Reader #Outer Banks #abuse #near-death experience #non con #nonconsensual #request #of bullets and wounds

[mayhem-neverending]

The Big Bad Wolf

Part VIII

Word Count: 4,683

Warnings: cursing, rumors, Canon fighting

Notes: I had to stop this before it got too long. I'm hoping to get the next part later, but it really depends on how quickly I can get my self-imposed chores done :/ Enjoy!!

Konoha’s rumor mill was truly an astounding thing. You were bombarded with questions regarding your alleged relationship with the Hokage before even stepping foot into the Tower. You attempted dispelling the rumors, but to no avail; you could tell by their expressions that they didn’t believe a word of your denial.

Whispers followed you to his door, where you knocked more frantically than you meant in your attempt to get away from all of the stares. You tried desperately not to make eye contact with anyone, lest they take it as an opportunity to ask you more questions. Thankfully, you were allowed entry shortly after your knock.

As soon as the door opened to reveal you, Lord Sixth loudly jested, “Oh, look who it is; my secret lover!”

You slammed the door shut behind you and through gritted teeth said, “Don’t encourage them,”

He was obviously very amused by the situation, with the way his eyes crinkled and how he lazily leaned back in his tall chair. You wondered whether people weren’t bothering him, or if he was just used to all the attention.

You were drenched from the rain, your hair dripping and your shoes leaving a trail of water in their wake as you went to place your reusable bag on his desk. It hit the wood with a muted clank that somewhat satisfied your growing exasperation.

You pinched the bridge of your nose. “I keep telling people I’m not, but when they found out I was bringing you dinner they just went ham,”

Kakashi chuckled heartily, and went about sweeping the scattered scrolls and paperwork onto one corner of the desk so he could see what you had brought him. He slid the bag in front of him and carefully removed the glass containers and utensils.

You were becoming increasingly aware of the puddle forming on the floor the longer you stood at his desk. You watched uncomfortably as he opened the first container, a warm, comforting smell wafted through the air, and he looked quite pleased.

“I should have warned you before you came; our love affair has been all anyone has talked about all day… is this Oyakadon?”

“Yeah, I thought it would be good for the rainy weather,” you hinted.

He looked up at you and seemed to only realize right then that you were soaked to the bone. You watched recognition form on his face, immediately followed with apologetic eyes.

“Shit, I’m sorry. You didn’t have to make the trip in the rain, I would have been fine,”

You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “I told you I would, so I did. It’s not like I won’t have to go back out in it to get Hikaru,”

“Still,”

Both of you remained silent for a few moments. He gazed into your eyes like he was trying to read your thoughts, which was a little unnerving. If he could read your thoughts, he would have caught you calling him a ‘real oddity’.

“Well, are you gonna eat or what?” You broke the silence.

“Right,” He picked up his chopsticks and brought some chicken and sticky rice up.

He paused, and you raised a brow. “Thank you,”

“You’re welcome,”

You waved your hand dismissively and turned on your heel, satisfied and ready to pick up your son, something you assumed you would only just make it on time for.

“Leaving so soon? Our audience outside will be very disappointed,”

You stopped mid-stride and glanced over your shoulder. If he wasn’t wearing a mask, you would have witnessed a shit-eating grin. You chose to ignore the second part of his statement.

“Sorry, but duty calls, Loverboy,”

You only brought dinner two more times that week; afraid anymore would solidify the rumors following you lately. The attention caused you a great amount of anxiety, so you tried to focus your attention elsewhere. Namely, with Obito.

The two of you spent the better part of the week trying to decide what he was going to do. He seemed to be entertained by shooting down any suggestion you could come up with, which only served to irritate you. And that seemed to entertain him, too.

On Thursday, you suggested woodworking, since he seemed to have exceptional attention to detail.

He was sitting on the couch, arms crossed behind his head and an ankle resting over his knee. He hummed in faux contemplation.

“Nah,”

You threw the rag you had been dusting with down and spun to face him with surprising speed. His amusement was clearly visible and it only made you bristle.

“I’m gonna kick your ass!” you jabbed a finger at him to punctuate your words.

“I’d like to see you try,” He drawled.

“Why you-!”

“Now that’s not actually a bad idea, can’t remember the last time I sparred,”

“Get your ass outside then,” you growled.

You were just short of stomping behind him as you followed him to the door where he put his shoes on. You intentionally knocked into him as you went out the door.

He laughed at your antics, and you couldn’t help but feel a little twinge of all your pent up anger and anxiety leave you. He followed behind you at a languid pace to the backyard and positioned himself a short distance across from you.

You couldn’t help but notice the way his upper arm muscles flexed as he raised them in front of his body under his grey long sleeve shirt. He was quickly putting on weight, that was clear.

All defiance and anger dissipated the moment his brows dipped as his expression became serious. His dark eyes flickered with an intensity that made the hair on your neck stand on end. All of the sudden, you remembered that this man was literally a war criminal - the war criminal and he was beyond powerful, even in his weakened state.

You dropped your fighting stance. You let out a nervous laugh as he did the same. “You know what, I changed my mind. I haven’t fought anyone in years, it wouldn’t be much of a fight,”

You could tell he understood exactly what you were trying to say, and you thought he would give it up, but then he said: “Come on, you brought me all the way out here. I thought you said you were hot shit, with all your training with Genma,”

You inhaled deeply. “Fine, just- don’t break any of my bones, please,”

You both returned to your starting stances.

“Only taijutsu?”

“Only taijutsu,”

Without warning, he swung a fist at you. The reaction in your body was instantaneous, like you had never stopped training. You simultaneously ducked while taking hold of his wrist; using his own momentum to send him flying towards the ground.

He tucked and rolled onto his feet, hardly giving you a chance to turn around before he was on you again. You blocked his next advance with some effort, your muscles straining against his strength, a telltale sign it had been too long since you had done this.

Your heart beat rapidly as you narrowly avoided a kick to the side. You took on the offensive position, hardly able to keep up with him as you continued your dance. You searched for anything that would give you an advantage, but at this rate you were coming up empty. He wasn’t letting up or giving you time to recover, and you could hear your own breathing becoming labored.

This was, however, one of the most exciting things you had done in years. To stretch your mind and muscles was a real treat, and you found yourself thoroughly enjoying it. The next punch he threw, you grabbed hold of his wrist with one hand and used his shoulder to leverage yourself to roll off his back and behind him. You swiped a leg and caught him by the ankles, sending him onto his hands and knees.

You all but collapsed onto your bottom, not giving him a chance to come back at you to fully finish the fight. You panted as he stood up with a grunt. You were pleased to see a bead of sweat on his forehead when he turned towards you.

He stood over you and held out a hand to help you up, a bright smile gracing his handsome face. You took his hand and let him do all the work of pulling you up. He was able to do it as if you wighed no more than a feather.

“You surprised me,”

You put your hands against your thighs, panting but happy with your success. “Shoulda seen me.. at my best.. fuck am I outta shape,”

His grin only widened. “I guess we found an activity to occupy me,”

“Asolutely not,”

“C’mon, it’ll be fun. Besides, I thought you said you were gonna support me?” His grin turned to a sly smile that suited him all too well.

You glared at him while you gave yourself a second to think it over. “I’ll make you a deal,”

“I’m listening,”

“I’ll spar with you a couple times a week IF you choose another activity by the end of the day - and if you can’t decide I’ll choose it for you.”

“Deal,” he replied without hesitation.

“That means you actually have to partake in the activity,”

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I will,”

“Good,”

He didn’t choose anything, instead partaking in a whole lot of snacking and a bit of reading while your tired arms started on your project of staining the floors. The next day, you brought over your sewing supplies that had been sitting on the top shelf of your coat closet, begging to be used.

He wasn’t enthused by your decision, but you reminded him of your deal, so he went about figuring out what kind of project to begin. On Monday, you came to work to find him passed out on the couch, and probably over a hundred small triangle and rectangle shaped pieces of fabric strewn about with a pair of scissors open on the floor next to his hand.

By the end of the week, he had made significant progress with his quilting project, even though he spent a good portion of time begging you to train with him in between working on it. He had drawn out a ridiculously complicated pattern for a quilt (because it’s mentally stimulating, he says) and most of the squares had been made out of the smaller pieces seemingly overnight.

You brought news of his progress, along with a picture of a couple squares to Kakashi with his dinner.

Kakashi was incredibly pleased, to say the least. He complimented your performance, and you couldn’t help but feel proud. You two chatted a while longer, commenting on the latest gossip surrounding you two, which people couldn’t seem to get enough of, and how his work was going.

You still had a spring in your step and a small smile still on your face from his compliments on your walk to pick Hikaru up from school. The dead leaves crunched underfoot and the tip of your nose went numb from the cold. It was becoming dark already, and it made the already chilling breeze bitterly cold.

You pulled your hat down to cover the tips of your ears to avoid them getting the same treatment as your nose. Despite the cold, you enjoyed the evening walk. Lights flickered to life in peoples’ windows, illuminating the street. It was nice to just listen sometimes; the chatter of people walking by, the meow of an ally cat, the fabric of your coat rubbing as you swung your arms in time with your steps.

Far too soon, you arrived at the school. Although you loved your son dearly, you relished the time you spent alone on your daily walks. A dusting of warmth greeted you as you opened the door, and you let out a little contented sigh. You walked slowly to his classroom, and upon entering little arms wrapped around your right leg in a chokehold.

On the days you saw Kakashi, he was one of the last kids to be picked up and he was always excited to see you. You ruffled his hair and lifted him into your arms while a teacher came around with his coat and helped you put it on him. You thanked them and waved goodbye; your little boy tucking his hooded head into your shoulder for the journey home.

He fell asleep that way, and you tried your best to quietly let yourself into your apartment and gently put him in his own bed. You carefully removed his extra layers and cracked the door behind you. After shedding your own layers, you headed to the bathroom for a hot shower. You decided to check your phone while the water warmed up and saw a text from Genma

Hey, I’m having a bday party 3 wks from today. Think we’re going to Your Place. Think you can make it?

That would be Hikaru’s dad’s weekend, so theoretically, yes. The question was moreso whether you wanted to go. You really didn’t have the energy to party these days, especially at a fancy club. He would be really excited if you went though, and if you didn’t already have plans..

You sighed. He had been trying to hang out with you for the last couple of weeks, but you two hadn’t been able to find a good time to do it. With his schedule unpredictable and you always having Hikaru, it was nearly impossible for both of you to be available at the same time.

You wouldn’t have to stay more than an hour. Just make a little appearance, have a single drink, and go home, you reasoned.

Yes, text me the time closer to the date Anything you want for your bday?

Another week flew by as a dedicated Obito worked on his massive project and you went about your regular business with the addition of finishing the floors. The two of you sparred a few times, but you weren’t lucky enough to win any of those. Your body was sore from the beatings it took, but it was actually great exercise for your mind, and it had you feeling really good - energized, even.

You enjoyed watching Obito become engrossed with his project; the way his face scrunched and his shoulders hunched when he was particularly focused. In turn, he was appreciative to see you start showing up to work in your oversized sweaters and comfortable pants as the cold outside persisted. You looked so adorable he even let you boss him around on Friday. He chopped wood for the fireplace and the two of you stacked them neatly against the side of the house. He even helped you clean out the fireplace, which covered both of you in dust and soot. He would have been irritated had you not giggled and brushed a hand through his hair and against his cheek to try to remove it, only to make it worse.

He was nearly finished with the quilt by the following Tuesday. He had only a few squares left to attach, so you decided to cook him one of your favorite meals growing up. It was a dish for special occasions, you had told him that morning before you ran to the store to buy a few ingredients.

You returned with a whole chicken and bacon, and set about your task. “My great grandma used to make this for us for the holidays before she passed,”

Obito sat at the kitchen table so that he could be closer to you while he finished his project. He had noticed the atmosphere between the two of you had become much more lax since you had begun the sparring sessions. There was only a hint of professionalism left, and even then you had to squint to see it. More and more he found himself wanting to be closer to you. At first, the desperation and longing for another human’s presence was dissipating with your continued visits. Now, though, he felt that longing tenfold, but in a different way, because it wasn’t just for another human anymore, it was for you.

Even the sparring was an excuse for him to be close to you; to touch you. His fingers always twitched in your presence, always seeking contact he wasn’t allowed to have. You were like a magnet, and he couldn’t escape the pull, not that he wanted to.

“Was she from Akujia, too?” He asked absently, rethreading his needle.

“Yeah, about half of my dad’s family is,”

“Do you ever miss it?”

You contemplated for a moment while you added a plethora of spices to the large pot. “No, I don’t think so. I miss my grandma, and I get a little overly sentimental about some of my childhood memories, but Akujia as a whole is not a good place,”

“I’ve only been there once, and it’s safe to say I wasn’t welcome,” he glanced over at you.

“I’m not surprised. There’s a reason my family moved here,”

You stopped the conversation there and moved around to the cabinets to find a can of green beans. You found them and set them on the counter with the other ingredients for one of your side dishes. While you worked, you became increasingly aware of the temperature difference next to the stove compared to the rest of the kitchen. A shiver ran down your spine while you were away from it, washing the cutting board in the sink.

“Are you cold?”

You startled, not expecting his raspy voice to come from right behind you. How was he always behind you?

“Are you deliberately trying to give me a heart attack?” You half-heartedly glared over your shoulder at him.

“Sorry, old habits die hard,”

And then, "Aren't you supposed to be a shinobi?"

"There's no danger I need to be on edge about here," You stated matter-of-factly.

You glanced at him again, and he opened his mouth to say something but was rudely interrupted by the loud ringing of your cellphone. You made an apologetic face and wiped your hands off on a kitchen towel.

You fished it out of your bag and answered without checking the caller ID.

“Hello?”

“Hi, this is Sage, am I speaking to Hikaru’s mom?”

“Oh, hi, yes,”

“Yeah, um, Hikaru is running a fever, so he needs to go home,”

You pulled the phone away just long enough to look at the time. It was only 11am. You tried not to sigh audibly, but Obito saw it on your face.

“Okay, I’ll be there as soon as I can,”

“Alright, thanks. We’ll see you soon!”

You put the phone back in your bag and quickly turned to Obito. "Could you start a fire while I'm out please?"

"Sure, but-"

"I'll be back before you know it," You called, somehow already halfway out the door.

Obito hesitantly followed your direction and started a fire in his large fireplace. He appreciated the way the newly stained wood surrounding the hearth reflected the flames in a warm glow. The pretty image didn’t distract him more than a few seconds; his thoughts centered on you and why you had to leave.

He was concerned about what you had to rush out the door for. All he could conceive was an emergency Kakashi had called on you for, but even then he wasn't sure how plausible that was. Possibly a family emergency, maybe even danger?

He stirred your green beans a few times in between pacing around. It was rather unfortunate that his brain could only conjure the worst scenarios. He tried his best to ignore his intrusive thoughts, but his mental fortitude was not at its peak these days. It was a very distressing forty-five minutes for him.

He was more than relieved to hear your footsteps approaching his door, and ran a hand through his hair one last time as you opened it. And the sight before him was nothing his mind could have conjured. His eyes widened as you shut the door behind you. In your arms was a little boy in an oversized coat, his head tucked tightly under your chin.

“Sorry it took so long, I had to ask Kakashi how to get him through the barrier,” You slung a backpack off of your shoulder and onto the floor next to the couch.

You weren’t looking at him; your focus was solely on the little boy. You gently tugged his coat off and tried to lay him down on the couch, but his little arms clung to your neck in a death grip. His face scrunched up like he was going to cry and you softly shushed him until he relaxed back into your arms.

You finally chanced a glance at Obito, who wore an unreadable expression. “You.. who’s kid?”

Obito regretted the bluntness of his tone when you flinched at his question. He didn’t want to be rude to you, he was just very confused. Not once did he think he would be seeing a kid again while he was stuck in his lifelong house arrest (with possibility of parole in ten years, his mind reminded him, though he was fairly sure it would not be granted).

“He’s mine,” you said in a small voice.

“Wait, what?”

You ran your fingers through your son’s brown curls and hugged him tighter to your chest. You nervously averted your eyes.

“I’m sorry I didn’t bring it up before, I just…” you trailed off.

You straightened your back, made eye contact with him and spoke up, “I guess it’s a long story why. Anyway,”

You walked up to stand next to him. You peeled your son’s face away from your chest just enough so Obito could fully see his face. Now that he could actually see him, he couldn’t help but notice the striking resemblance between the two of you. You shared the same eye color, nose and chins, and he was sure if the boy smiled it would be an exact replica of yours. The boy blinked slowly at him with bleary eyes.

“This is Hikaru,”

You turned your head to look up at him. “I’m sorry for bringing him, I should have asked. I just really wanted to cook this dinner for you and I don’t have anyone else to take him,”

Obito shook his head. “No, it’s just uh, unexpected. I had no idea,”

He stared at Hikaru, who stared right back. You didn’t comment and took him back over to the couch, where he let you put him down this time. You took off his shoes and pulled a small blanket out of the backpack you had brought with you. He curled up into a little ball while you tucked him in and pressed a kiss to his temple.

Obito watched you tenderly brush his hair back and whisper to him with the gentlest expression he could ever recall seeing. Your eyes softened just for him and he could see in your movements just how much you loved your son. He felt out of place witnessing such an intimate moment, but he couldn’t force his eyes away. He would be lying if he said seeing you like this didn't do something dangerous to his heart.

You pressed your fingers to his temple and a soft green glow emitted from them. You stood when his eyes fully closed and you had pressed one last kiss to his forehead. You were still wearing that sweet expression when you made eye contact with Obito again, and it made his heart rate pick up.

A sudden pang of envy reverberated in his stomach and chest. How different would his life have been had someone only loved him like that when he was young?

“I’m sorry, just let me do one more thing before I get back to it,”

He only nodded. He watched you peel a couple garlic cloves and crush them before returning to your son’s side. “I know this looks weird as fuck, but it really helps,”

You took his socks off and pressed the crushed cloves against the bottoms of his feet before putting them back on him. You started getting up but halted upon seeing his expression. "You're not mad, are you?"

He hadn't realized he was glaring until you said something. It instantly dropped. "No, why would I be mad?"

You shrugged one shoulder. "I dunno, maybe you don't like kids or something,"

There was a heaviness to your tone that he decidedly did not like, and he was sure he was not the sole cause of it. He opened his mouth and closed it a few times, unsure how to express the plethora of emotions he was experiencing at that moment.

"I don't.. not like kids," He managed lamely.

"Hm,"

You took your place back at the sink and turned the water on so you could finish taking care of your dishes. He took a spot close to you and leaned his back against the counter so he could still see your face. He didn't know where to begin, because how had he spent 5 days a week with you for like, two months now without ever hearing about you having a literal toddler?

The most important question to his heart in that moment, however, was: "Are you married then, or?"

You let out a derisive snort. "No. I wouldn't be here if I was,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" There was an edge of offense to his voice.

You set your mouth in a straight line before answering, "His father wouldn't allow me to work, especially not anywhere near another man,"

Your eyes were hard when you made eye contact with him. "That's why I haven't trained in years,"

His lips formed an "O". He thought about it for long enough that you finished the dishes and started cleaning the countertops.

You worked quietly for a long while. He went and finished his quilt after watching you for a bit, questions swirling in his mind. He was curious, but you looked like you didn’t want to be bothered after sharing that little tidbit about your past relationship.

“Thank you,” you said unprompted.

You stood next to his spot at the table with a troubled expression. “For what?”

“Not prying, and not getting upset about me bringing him. It wasn’t right for me to spring that on you, and I’m sorry for that,”

“It’s really alright, sure it was unexpected, but I don’t mind. You don’t have to apologize,”

You looked to the side out of the kitchen window and stated distantly, “I lost a lot of friends when I got pregnant. I’m appreciative of your minimal reaction,”

“… is that why you never mentioned him?”

“Probably,”

“So, you consider me a friend, then?”

The corner of your lips quirked up. “Is that what I said?”

“Hm, pretty sure, yeah,” He smirked.

You took your attention away from the window and gave him a real smile. You leaned towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Your touch felt like flames licking across his muscles and it took the majority of his attention not to show it.

“Of course I do. Only a true friend could annoy me and entertain me at the same time,”

“You’re such an ass,” he rolled his eyes.

“As your friend-” you started.

“I’m your friend, I didn’t say anything about you being mine,”

You seemed to change your mind about continuing whatever you were going to say. You simply shook your head and started towards the hallway.

“Wait, what were you going to say?”

“Don’t worry about it,” you disappeared around the corner without turning around.

He scrambled to his feet, afraid he had upset you with his joke. The chair scraped loudly against the wood floor, but before he could get two steps in, crying sounded from the couch.

“Shit,” he muttered.

Part IX

Tags: @mostlyunsure, @humongousdreamlandbear

#x reader #naruto #x y/n #obito lives au #Obito x reader #obito uchiha x reader #Obito Uchiha #Kakashi hatake #Au

[trapny]

Had a conversation with a scammer yesterday and it happened at 8 am right before I was going to sleep (I was up very very late due to medical issues that you don't want to hear about and I don't want to talk about)

Anyways here's the entire conversation (with occasional inside commentary ;3)

8:04 AM - Scammer: Hey

8:04 AM - Trapny: Oh my god

(the reason I reacted like this was because I actually had two scammers contact me at the same time. I decided to just talk to this one.)

8:05 AM - Scammer: How are you?

8:05 AM - Trapny: Fine

8:05 AM - Scammer: it seems you are fun to chat with

8:05 AM - Scammer: where are you from ?

8:05 AM - Trapny: Antarctica

8:06 AM - Scammer: really ?

8:06 AM - Trapny: Yeah cause I'm chill as fuck

8:06 AM - Scammer: What do you do for living

8:06 AM - Trapny: I sell trash in an alley to raccoons

8:06 AM - Scammer: okay thats nice

8:07 AM - Trapny: It is very nice

8:07 AM - Scammer: I am a digital marketer with vast years of experience

8:07 AM - Scammer: How can we help ourselves

8:08 AM - Trapny: O shit you're a digital marketer? You think you could help my trash selling business take off?

8:08 AM - Scammer: Can I get to know you more?

8:08 AM - Trapny: Yeah sure bro

8:08 AM - Scammer: yes

8:08 AM - Scammer: did you wanna grow your business

8:08 AM - Trapny: Yeah I'm really tryna grow and reach out to some more raccoons y'know?

8:09 AM - Scammer: yes if you wanna do that I will send you a plan for the task

8:09 AM - Trapny: Uh sure?

8:10 AM - Scammer: IMG-20240406-WA0000.jpg ↓

8:10 AM - Scammer: let me see some stuffs you sell

8:10 AM - Trapny: Ok ok check me out

8:10 AM - Scammer: alright

8:11 AM - Trapny: IMG-20240406-WA0001.jpg (file attached) ↓

8:11 AM - Trapny: IMG-20240406-WA0003.jpg (file attached) ↓

8:11 AM - Trapny: IMG-20240406-WA0002.jpg (file attached) ↓

8:12 AM - Scammer: ok we first need to create a business suite for your business

8:12 AM - Trapny: I already got one in the alley where I do all my trash selling

8:13 AM - Scammer: okay did you have an online store for selling

8:13 AM - Scammer: that will still boost your sales

8:13 AM - Trapny: Nah man I like to be more personal with the customers you know?

8:13 AM - Scammer: yeah

8:14 AM - Scammer: did you have a channel on YouTube ?

8:14 AM - Trapny: No but maybe I should make one to attract more customers

8:14 AM - Scammer: yes you can

8:14 AM - Trapny: And by customers I mean the raccoons I sell trash to

8:15 AM - Scammer: yes i will drive more audience to your channel

8:15 AM - Trapny: Damn bro fr?

8:15 AM - Scammer: but at first we need to create a channel

8:15 AM - Scammer: are you there?

(At this point, exhaustion had just hit me point blank. It was 8 am and I was very very tired. I didn't feel like dragging this out any longer. In hindsight, this jarring break of character probably confused this guy so much. Which is really funny to me.)

8:16 AM - Trapny: Honestly my guy I'm kinda tired. I'm not keeping up the facade anymore man. Just leave me alone.

8:16 AM - Trapny: Do you ever get tired?

8:16 AM - Scammer: yes, sometimes

8:16 AM - Trapny: Do you ever feel like maybe it isn't worth it?

8:16 AM - Scammer: how much did you make daily?

8:16 AM - Trapny: Go eat some chocolate or something bro happiness is good for you

8:17 AM - Scammer: yes thank

[Number blocked]

And that was the end.

He "yes thank"ed right out of my life.

I gotta wonder what was going through his mind when this happened. What did he think was going on here? I'll never know.

#trapny originals

[laoih]

Avatar: The Last Airbender (2024)

Another version of Bumi & why I like him

Let me preface this with the disclaimer that I'm fully aware that Netflix's Avatar: The Last Airbender has its flaws. But for me personally, the things it does well are fare more interesting, and so I would like to explain why I like how they changed Bumi as a character within the story of the live action adaptation. I'm bad at keeping it short, so this turned out a rather long post – my apologies. Also: potential trigger warning for mentions of suicidal ideation.

The starting point: Bumi in the cartoon

Cartoon-Bumi in the original series is a character who is very much rooted in the original medium. He lends himself well to comedy, and his challenges for Aang teach Aang and the young audience about opening onself to new possibilities, to think outside the box, to approach obstacles from new perspectives. It's good advice, and Aang takes it to heart and implements it at times later on. The reunion between Aang and Bumi is also sweet, and all in all it's an enjoyable episode.

Aang's position from the live action angle

Now, if the same plot is moved to the live action series (LA), the tone of this storyline is automatically changed as well because we are now looking at it through the lense of the LA. The cartoon is aimed at a young audience and has a big focus on comedy, so we can easily ignore some aspects of the situation that now come more into focus in the adaptation:

Aang just recently has learned that all of his people, the Air Nomads, have been wiped out and he is the last airbender.

Aang also has leaned that as the Avatar it is his duty to restore balance to the world and to defeat the Firelord.

A 100 years old man is challenging a traumatized kid to solve some tasks while his friends are being threatend by death-by-growing-crystal.

As I said – in the cartoon it's fine to think of riding Koi fish as the first order of business, and it's fine to threaten the kids with death because nobody dies anyway. It's fine for the cartoon not to dwell on these things. But the live action series explicilty wants to pay attention to some of these aspects, propbably especially because the cartoon could only address them in very small doses. I'm not saying that the live action always does it well, but the intention is there and it's different to the cartoon.

Aang's trauma and Bumi's response

In the live action, Aang cannot easily put his loss or his responsibilities aside. He is mourning Gyatso and the Airbenders in basically every episode, he is shocked by what he sees of the war in Omashu, and the need to go to the Northern Water Tribe is much more urgent because of Kyoshi's warning.

Would or should Bumi as Aang's friend as he is in the cartoon really pretend he does not know Aang in the LA, and would or should he trick him into believing his friends are in danger of dying? Even if he thinks Aang needs to learn a lesson, is that the right time and the right way to do it? Coming from the perspective of the LA, to me it seems needlessly cruel to threaten Katara and Sokka with death and Aang with the possibility that his friends might die, all while Aang is still dealing with the loss of his people and the fact that he somehow has to save the Northern Water Tribe. I think Bumi would no seem like a nice person or a good friend even if he was copied 1:1 from the cartoon. To me, in this new context it wouldn't make much sense to treat Aang in such a way, just because he thinks that Aang needs to learn a lesson or because it's fun to mess with people.

Fitting Bumi in the new context

Bumi in the cartoon is the episode's obstacle that Aang needs to overcome. If Bumi is to stay an obstacle in the live action, he now needs to have a different reason or motivation to become such an obstacle. A cartoon Bumi who is neither bitter nor angry but rather wants to help and is happy to see Aang can no longer realistically be that obstacle. Rather, I would expect that a wise old man of a 100 years would be more open and supportive right from the start when he meets his young 12 year old friend who just learned that his whole family has been massacred.

So how and why would Bumi still be an obstacle? The writer's answer to that was: because he is no longer wise and friendly, but lethargic and bitter. Why is he bitter? Because he has lived through 100 years of war and had to make horrible choices that still haunt him, and each year the hope for the war and for the suffering to end became smaller and smaller. The Avatar may have been the representation of that hope when the war started – but 100 years later he has become the representation of all the times that Bumi was hopeful but eventually disappointed.

His opposition to Aang in the episode includes three main aspects:

I. Bitterness towards Aang and the Avatar: Bumi blames the Avatar for being absent because the Avatar should have been there to help and wasn't. This isn't a rational reaction though, it's born out of the loss and the bitterness in Bumi's life. It's also personal for him, because Aang was Bumi's friend, and as the Avatar could have helped but didn't. On top of that Bumi resents Aang's disbelief when it comes to Bumi's capacity to care – they are separated by 100 years of lived experience that Aang completely missed and Bumi had to endure. Of course in this case Bumi also ignores the loss that Aang recently (from his perception) has suffered.

→ With this the writers set up a character who is emotionally no longer able to support Aang or take Aang's own situation and problems into consideration. He is mentallypositioned to be an obstacle to Aang, to be inconsiderate, ruthless and actually dangerous.

II. A lesson to learn: Bumi intends to teach Aang a lesson to make him understand why he is the way he is now. He cannot speedrun the last 100 years for Aang, but can give him and example of what his own experience has been in the past and what forced him to stop caring: he shows him what it's been like in the past when you are forced to make impossible choices, and what – in Bumi's mind – awaits Aang in the future.

→ This provides a motivation for Bumi to fight against Aang in all seriousness. Bumi is not playing games, because this has been the harsh reality for him. It rises the dramaturgical stakes of the fight.

III. Losing the will to live: Bumi is tired after 100 years, and that becomes very apparent in the fight. It is a part of a larger theme in the LA that explores what war does to people. In Bumi's case it has made him numb because he wouldn't have been able to deal with the horrors of war otherwise all this time. That is why he does not move a hand when he is about to be crushed – it seems to be a relief, and if it can teach Aang the intended lesson: all the better.

→ With Aang already knowing who Bumi is, this rises the emotional stake of the fight. Aang no longer is fighting an unknown weird old man, he is fighting someone who he believes to be a friend, and even worse: his friend appears to be suicidal. Having to fight and protect Bumi at the same time puts Aang under a huge amount of pressure both emotionally and when it comes to his bending skills.

The resolution: fighting hopelessness with connection

Granted, the ending is not as well executed as it could be. But for me it still carries the intended idea – or at least the idea as I understood it:

War can isolate people. Bumi has been fighting a war, and surely has lost people close to him, or cannot see them because battle grounds have a habit of interrupting travel. We also know there have been spies in the city as well as rebells who are unhappy with Bumi's rule, so it's difficult to even trust the people who are supposed to fight on Bumi's side.

Aang is the counter to all of that: he was able travel to the city because he can fly and cross borders and distances more easily. He is also saved from the predicament that Bumi has put him in because his friends have independently found a way to reach them, and luckily in time.

When he pulls out the gift that Bumi had given him all these years ago, it's very symbolic: the sky bison whistle allows Aang to call upon his friend Appa. And Appa has already saved Aang in the first episode, and will do so again in the episode following Aang's and Bumi's fight.

It's a reminder that for people who have lost the will to live the best hope is the connection with other people. It may seem trivial to those who don't have to struggle in that way, but a reminder of a connection, of friendship, of support or even just shared struggle can be incredible powerful. That's why I believe it is believable for Bumi to give it one more try. After all, the return of the Avatar as a potential powerful ally is also a good motivation to fight back once more.

#natla #Netflix Avatar #netflix atla #Bumi #Avatar The Last Airbender #natla review #natla meta #avatar: the last airbender #trigger warning: mentions of suicidal ideation

[dracononite]

What's your journey with queerness been like?

Been sitting on this question for a bit cause there's a lot to the answer. In short, being queer and trans has probably been the biggest joy of my life, and has been very freeing and allowed me to embrace my identity and love myself and others in a colorful, authentic and fulfilling way.

but here's a longer answer about the journey:

I didn't start figuring out my gender and orientation until I was going on 17, since I was raised in the south with very little sex education or inclusion outside of "wear condoms". I wasn't exposed to the idea of LGBTQ+ identities outside of gay or lesbian until (drumroll....) Tumblr! once I came across the term "nonbinary" that's when it all kinda clicked, at least for my gender. I played around with labels, tried on neutrois for a bit, but pretty quickly came to be totally comfortable with just- nonbinary. I'm just me! (I used the term "transmasc" along with nonbinary for a long while, but within the past year have accepted that I'm generally GNC and enjoy both masculine and feminine presentation in addition to androgynous, so have dropped the "masc" label.)

sexual & romantic orientation has been another journey entirely. I've questioned my orientation repeatedly ever since I found myself, as an at-the-time girl, in an online relationship with also an at-the-time girl. like I knew it was inherently LGBT but it didn't feel like I was lesbian, and this was before I learned any other terms or figured out I was nonbinary, so in my head I was like "??? this is fine, right?" (it was, even if we didn't work out in the end,) and I'd had a boyfriend in high school too, so I didn't think I was homosexual.

once I started learning more about LGBTQ+ labels, I think the first thing I thought I was, was asexual. which, is fine, I was an anxious, dysphoric teen and didn't have any real experience. I eventually moved on to demi/pan, which I stuck with for a while, cause I'd finally become more confident in myself as a person and my relations with others (thanks, college!).

and sometime last year I think, I dropped demi/pan and have just gone with "queer" and, more recently, "sapphic." My relationship with gender and romance is pretty ambiguous but I'm so happy to say that I'm totally comfortable with who I am and the relationship I'm in, and enjoy and celebrate being LGBTQ+! I've never thought that I would find a forever-label for my orientation, and I accept that it will continue to change and evolve with me throughout my life cause well, I'm still questioning pieces of it right now.

I like to be my absolute authentic self with my friends, family and loved ones, and I'm lucky to have a supportive family in my mom and brother - even if my environment growing up wasn't always safe and there were people who doubted or belittled me. I never felt like I had to hide anything from my mom and brother, which probably helped a lot in allowing myself to figure out my identity and beliefs at a pretty young age all things considered. I've never been one to repress who I am, and I never will be.

I've never really felt that announcing any changes in my labels to my online audience is important for me specifically, but I like it to be known that I'm queer and trans. cause if sharing my journey or perspective online helps anyone else figure things out or feel accepted, included, and proud to be LGBTQ+, then I'm happy to do so on occasion.

Thanks for the question!

#mail #max talks #lgbtq+ #queer #nonbinary #trans #sapphic #if anyone has more specific questions about this topic or my identity - feel free to ask! #being met with confusion or disgust about being LGBTQ+ in my formative years probably just made me commit harder #I've been known to be fueled by spite and the will to prove people wrong #side note: #I also discovered otherkinity at the same time as LGBTQ+ identities #which absolutely played a big part in figuring out who I am as a whole #if anyone's curious about that. i could maybe talk about it. but I'm not used to being totally open with being alterhuman

[archivalofsins]

Okay, with that out of the way. I'm at the halfway point of Caligula Effect 2 and as a filthy Caligula Effect player I will not take this slander anymore- Firstly, this game think it's fucking funny- HUH?!

Yamanaka think he's fucking funny pulling this shit directly after how dirty he narratively did Eiji Biwasaka- Forgiveness moving forward from the past letting people grow! Oh, we do that now?! What about that final destination death my guy? What about that? That karma shit everybody in the first go home club was talking all that good crap about.

Okay, fine pressing that hard to the side. That's not important anymore.

I mostly came here to say that it really seems like a lot of what good people are trying to find in the Milgram characters is like just legitimately the Caligula Effect 2 cast. To the point that it's like it can't be that because it's quite literally a character he's written before. The cop thing with Kazui um Shota is right fucking there. Shidou cool Docktor is right fucking there and I may be jumping the gun on that since I haven't finished his area. Yet, I feel super comfortable saying that anyhow.

It's just quite funny that many of the best interpretations of the characters the audience has had- The most benefit of the doubt filled interpretations or guesses about the reason behind their actions are legit just a description of a character from two. The most on the nose example of this being Mahiru and QP. Something that I don't even need to describe in writing one could just listen to this and get what I'm saying.

"This right here is how I truly am." "See look. I'll keep pursuing my paradise now. Oh, the pain- Pain. Damage: HIGH." - "I pretended to be a good girl, but really, I don't want to say "I'm ok"." "Tell me, oh tell me why, won’t you just accept me?"

Sure it's perfectly normal to create a favortie shape and love it. It's fine to create ones own personal interpretation of these characters and grow attached to them but- But! Will anyone try to even look past their own ego, their own desires for how they want these characters to be and just look at what's there before this ends. There's millions of possibilities so why just grow attached to the same old thing?

Because it's comfortable? Because it feels good? Because it's simple? This isn't meant to be simple. This is Milgram. if anyone wanted a simple truth something that could be wrapped up nice and neat it's right over there. Trying to force things into one mold for personal convenience isn't only harmful to others but oneself because people get it stuck in their head if this one thing can't be what they want then nothing can. When that simply isn't true.

Just because Milgram may not be that doesn't mean that thing doesn't exist out there somewhere. What happens when the character one has done this to no longer fits that mold? Would a person rather break themselves into bits trying to fit in or risk being broken standing out from being exactly who they are. What's a satisfying characterization? What makes a good character?

Is the way we an audienc can project on them? Relate to them? Is it how the story for them ends. Or is it that character being fully and unabashedly themselves? For all the good and bad that may cause. It's all subjective anyway. What makes a good character to one person will make a bad character to someone else.

This is what to me makes it super funny that a lot of the best assumptions people can give to the Milgram cast are so close to the stories of characters that came before them. By funny I mean super sad. Like how bad does a character need to be for the kindest interpretations of them to be in the shadow of characters the writer has made before.

That's so not interesting. What sort of writer wants to tell the same story over and over again? Wouldn't it be nice if everything could end up well. If all the milgram characters could learn, grow, and become better? Wouldn't it be nice if everyone could get along? Those sorts of questions. Those sorts of desires.

If that's a want one has then they may just enjoy Caligula Effect 2 more than they do Milgram. Because that just seems to be 2. From the looks of it Milgram isn't shaping up to be that sort of story. Though it definitely has a lot of Yamanaka's signature all over it and it's really great because through playing the games and looking at Milgram one has this nice experience of seeing a persons writing evolve over time.

Something that gives Milgram this rather unpredicatable feel that makes it even more entertaining. Also as it stands now I do still prefer Milgram to two in a lot of ways. Two is definitely not for everyone but the characters are still all pretty amazing (even though they're all grating as hell in their own ways). If I wasn't so sick to death of doing a shit ton of emotional labor I'd be enjoying it more. That was an issue I had with one as well.

So, I'll probably end up enjoying the experience more in hindsight like with that too. Definitely a difficult play though.

#gunsli rambles #milgram #caligula effect 2

[inkofamethyst]

December 17, 2023

Really kind of adore stories with parent figures fighting to find and protect their lost child (figure) while that child simultaneously grows up to become someone no longer in need of protecting! Broken Earth, The Witcher.. would love to find more books/series with that element, I think. Currently developing my reading list (finally starting some Sanderson!) and thinking about switching to Storygraph... only thing is that it's not as heavily utilized among my friends so I wouldn't necessarily be able to keep up with what they're reading. I suppose I don't necessarily want to be a "follower" in my friend group when it comes to doing a good thing, especially not with something that's ultimately a fairly inconsequential switch. Maybe that's a winter break goal.

You know what's wild? Last year one of my labmates took the class with this final project I'm working on right now, and she was in a group of three or four. That's a pretty solid amount of manpower and brainpower for a twenty page paper (plus 10+ pages in supplementary material). I'M LITERALLY DOING THIS ALONE. Same assignment. All by my lonesome. Will I get there? Ya I think so. But STILL.

[days later]

DONE.

Is it the best thing I ever wrote? God no. And that's a shame because it could have been really good had I not taken off two days last week. But it's done.

I hate writing introductions with all my heart. Everything else is fine, but orienting my audience to a topic? I'd rather skip that bit, honestly. So yeah. My intro kinda sucks. I think it picks up when we start talking about the basis of the work at hand, but it's otherwise pretty boring. Citations very spotty, with an overreliance on one source (even though i skimmed a ton of papers n even took notes too).

ngl kinda sucks bc it's going to my advisor and I know I could've done better ("but why didn't you" BECAUSE I WANNA GO HOME. OKAY? IM TIRED OF THIS PLACE. IM TIRED IN GENERAL. god i cant wait to get home)

not even going to mention how much little sleep I've gotten over the past 48 hours ugh.

can't even be thankful that it's over bc imma be anxious all the way up until i get that grade so.

im so bad at projects. bad at spacing things out. good at the planning. bad at the doing. decent at the crunch time. (the same sad song i weep every semester tbh.. "something's gotta change" yea yea yea)

well i dont want to go out all negative--im pretty proud of the future directions section. they came pretty naturally to me actually, and i think it's a bit of a testament to some of the growth ive had ~as a scientist~ this semester. thinking experimentally is still not easy, but i think i'm grasping some things related to my discipline which is good. thankful for that ig. also pretty happy with the discussion, I think my conclusions were pretty solid and interesting.

if-i-coulda-woulda-shoulda :/

[edit, next morning afternoon: so uh, i was anxious about the paper wile writing it and took an exedrin because of the anxious headache i got over it and the caffeine in the pill amplified my anxiety and that did not feel good at all]

[astarsol]

ch. 5 - inspiration

    the fresh coastal air overwhelms the office, a mixture of fresh baked goods and salt create an interesting aroma. you lean back in your chair as the computer screen shows a blank screen. your fingers run along the keyboard and yet nothing clicks. you've lost your inspiration to finish it.

  it could be easy to just say 'they live happily ever after', but since when did you write sloppily? you sit up, your eyes closing for a second, a slow breath releasing. 

  "you're going to finish this... and i'm sure it'll be fine," a voice sounds a little far off, coming from the hallway behind you. 

  you turn around to see akaashi standing within the doorframe. he points to your computer, his legs moving slowly to make his way towards you, "i saw you sitting on the document, figured you were stumped."

  "stumped is actually a phenomenal way to explain this. it's so stupid, most chapters only took me a day to figure out what i wanted to do. and this ending is taking weeks," you look out the window, pretending not to notice the possible annoyance in akaashi's voice. 

  he stops walking towards you, his feet planted just a meter from your chair. despite his kindness the past couple of days, it's very clear he doesn't want to be in italy. the hushed phone calls to friends (which you definitely weren't eavesdropping on), him continuously telling you you'll finish it in no time, etcetera etcetera...

  "well, how do you think i should finish it? you are my editor, why not give some advice, future writer?" you raise your eyebrows at the man, waiting for him to give some kind of advice. 

  he purses his lips, his arms crossing along his chest. "sell it to your audience, that they're truly happy. that the characters have undeniable energy... that you understand the complexities of love," at this point, akaashi has made his way closer to you as he explains.

  his body leaning towards you, his eyes growing uncontrollably more irresistible. it's like he has some pull on you as you learn towards him as well, his words so indulgent to listen to. "and how do i do that?" your heart beat quickens a little as you timidly smile. 

  "by writing what's in your heart, i mean, it's clear you love what you do. otherwise you wouldn't have this hard of time writing the end of it. just show that love," akaashi tilts his head, a smile making its way across his face as well. 

  "thanks akaashi, i appreciate the advice. now just to get ready for the book signing…”

  "you’re welcome," he nods, his lips pursing as you raise your eyebrows at him, "and we could head down to the library early and get some inspiration. if you'd like."

  "that is a phenomenon idea akaashi," you nod, watching as akaashi claps his hands together, saying a short 'great' before heading out of the room. maybe the characters need a little moment like this in chapter ten.

masterlist / previous / next

synopsis: you’re struggling to write a new book for your publishers. especially since it’s a romance novel, and you’re short on romance. what’s even worse is that your editor is terrible at communicating. so your boss sends the two of you on a ‘vacation’ of sorts. get the two of you to work out your differences and get you writing. what’ll happen to the two of you and how will your friends react through the short bursts of information you give them?

fun facts; - akaashi actually doesn’t know that you took that picture of him - he’ll sometimes add a ‘good job’ comment on the word doc to boost morale - part of him wants to stay a little longer… - tanaka and kiyoko talk about your love life together (i love them so much) - it’s short because the next one will be long :))

taglist (open): @merofvenus, @existential-traveller, @kurenix, @reveusecherie, @thechaosoflonging

#amorist duos smau #amorist duos #haikyuu smau #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu social media au #akaashi keiji x reader #akaashi keiji #keiji akaashi x fem!reader #keiji akaashi x reader

[redlegumes]

I Feel the Rush

Written for @eddiemunsonbingo

Square: Square C3 Cheap Motel

Title: I Feel the Rush

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 3,686

Ship(s): Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington, Steddie

Major Tags: Smut, Idiots in Love

Summary: Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson have been hooking up in secret. They've been going at it anywhere that was convenient. But after a tryst when their only option was a cheap motel, Steve feels he has to reveal his true feelings about their relationship.

"Steve's stupid heart thudded faster in his chest. Thinking about me all day? No. No, he was thinking about my cock. Though I'd take that little admission anyway. Steve was not immune to flattery, but he was wary of it. Eddie's flattery at first had confused him, bold and silly. Nowadays it just made him melt into a puddle. By the time Eddie crawled over Steve, lube in hand, he felt it in his core. More than desperation.

'Eddie, I need you.'

'Course you do handsome. That's why we're at the cheapest motel in twenty miles.'"

Link: AO3

EXPLICIT SMUT AFTER THE CUT

I feel the rush

Addicted to your touch

Oh, I feel the rush

It's so good, it's so good

...

Pass your boy the heatwave, recreate the sun

Take me to the feeling, boy, you know the one

Kiss it when you're done, man, this shit is so much fun

"So you’re into little singing twinks now?"

Steve turned and angled his head away from his phone speaker. He had just finished pressing play, setting it on the nightstand. "What?"

"Troye Sivan?" Eddie crinkled his nose in what Steve recognized was the same expression he wore when he saw a jar of mayo: utter disgust.

Steve didn't question how, despite his disapproval, Eddie still knew who the artist was. Troye was a gay musician with a mainstream audience. Eddie kept an eye on that sort of thing. 'Keeping up with the culture,' he would offhandedly say as an excuse if questioned as to why he knew Kim Petras was from Germany or ABBA's top five hits.

"Dude, just-"

"You know the rules," Eddie interrupted, looking even crosser. "No ‘dude’ when I’m touching you."

"You aren't touching me yet. You're just being an ass, bro-" Steve barely got the word out before Eddie launched himself over the bed, pinning him to the wall.

It knocked the breath out of Steve; Eddie's tongue quickly filled his mouth in a hot kiss that left him no chance to regain it. Steve's senses reacted the way they always did when Eddie manhandled him. His body prickled with heat. The longer Eddie plunged his tongue into Steve's mouth the more he salivated. Their jaws loosened steadily, adding a desperate, sloppy edge to each kiss. Eddie's hand worked up under Steve's shirt over his scars. The skin there had taken so long to heal, and Eddie loved exploring the sections on Steve that were now deadened to any sensation versus the patches that had become hypersensitive to touch.

Steve liked the beat of the song in the background even if he couldn't make out the lyrics any longer. Even as the playlist shifted to the next track, he felt it'd been the right choice. It fit the mood that night. Eddie was a rush. Wild and good and sweet. Steve tried to move from Eddie’s lips to other areas that had been growing into more tantalizing prospects, but in doing so he hit his head hard against the wall behind him.

All of Eddie's ferocity vanished, leaving a doe-eyed, attentive man Steve longed to call ‘darling.’

"Steve! Shit, are you okay?" His hand went to the back of Steve's head, cradling it.

God. He's so perfect. Steve felt his knees go weak. Eddie knew Steve had a history of head injuries, and even when they got rough he was always mindful of Steve's head. Steve had hardly noticed, but he remembered now, that when Eddie pinned him to the wall, he'd thrown his hand behind Steve's skull as a quick cushion before moving it under his clothes.

"No, I'm fine," Steve panted lightly. He reached up to drag his thumb over Eddie's wet, reddened bottom lip. "Hungry though."

Eddie looked puzzled for a second, and Steve used the opportunity to sink down in front of him onto his knees. He loved the wicked energy that reentered Eddie's eyes. His hand stayed, softly resting on Steve's head as Steve fumbled with his belt buckle and jeans. Eddie's cock waited for him under a pair of plain white boxers. Steve wrapped his mouth over Eddie's hidden head, letting the cotton soak up his saliva but keeping that barrier between Eddie's hot cock and the entrance to Steve's throat. Eddie always liked it more when there was teasing, a bit of a challenge or game.

He whined above Steve who was deeply proud. That noise normally didn't come till later. He continued to warm and wet Eddie's cock through the boxers until Eddie moaned. "Come stand back up. Christ."

Steve looked up at Eddie from his knees and licked his lips, knowing the position had to look good. He'd seen Eddie in it often enough. He adopted a tone of fake innocence. "Is that what I should be doing?" He ran his lips over the now translucent fabric of Eddie's underwear. "You don't want me to stay down here?”

"Steve. You trying to get me to cream my pants?" Eddie began mumbling just a little. "…because it might be working. You know I can't last when you play slutty like that." Steve smirked and blew his hot breath over his work. Eddie groaned, and his free hand gently ran along the underside of Steve's jaw until he guided Steve to look up at him by his chin. "Do I have to ask again?"

"No. I'll stand back up." Steve waited till he rose, eye level with Eddie once again before punctuating his sentence. "Dude."

Eddie practically tackled him onto the bed. His hands were now intentionally working at Steve's shirt, and he wanted so badly to be wearing less but there were rules to hooking up in motels.

Steve protested against Eddie's exuberant kisses. He pulled back, giggly and bright. "What were you saying, bro?"

Steve rolled his eyes. Okay, so maybe it is the worst. "The coverlet," Steve grumbled, barely getting the complaint out.

Eddie paused, bouncing his eyebrows rapidly up and down. “Eager to get to the main event?”

Steve huffed. “Oh fuck you.”

“Manners Harrington. Say please?” Eddie ground down onto Steve’s lap sharply.

Steve tried to stifle a moan, but his time on his knees had got him just as hard. His hips jerked up in response to Eddie's press. Eddie stretched over top of him, gathering his hair into a high bun, securing it with an elastic as Steve watched him. The motions were fluid, practiced, simple but Steve adored it. He could watch that movement on a loop all day long. Eddie's messy tresses tucked up out of reach, his long limbs stretching. Steve caught the way his lithe muscles flexed under his shirt as he tied the hair above his head. Eddie's face flushed, and his eyes narrowed as he observed Steve’s study of him.

“What were you thinking for this rondevu?”

“I think you know exactly what you want to do,” Steve said, letting his hands run along the bottom edge of Eddie’s shirt. “And I am perfectly happy with that.”

“Yeah?” Eddie cocked his head, trying to remain aloof while failing to suppress a shit eating grin. He loved to be given control. No matter how they switched it up, no matter the positions or roles, Steve had yet to be disappointed when he let Eddie take the lead. Steve loved the impression he got of a mastermind tinkering away in Eddie's head as soon as he did get that control. The ‘dungeon master’ at work.

"Yes. You devil."

Eddie laughed at that. He wriggled up and off of Steve. “Okay. Alright do your little bedbug check.” Eddie grabbed his backpack, no doubt pulling out the lube while Steve stripped the covers and checked for anything unspeakable.

The most worrisome part of the bedding had been the coverlet, which Steve stripped completely off and then began to strip down himself. It was visually apparent that the brief break from hot and heavy foreplay didn't diminish either of their appetites. Steve reclined nude back onto the sheets. Eddie made a little show of taking off his shirt and then fully getting out of his pants. He winked and bent down, turning away from Steve.

“Eds. Oh my God.” Steve felt his entire face heat up. Eddie had a black butt plug inserted and was displaying it for him. He had it this whole time?

Steve remembered the call he'd received earlier that day. Eddie had been insistent on seeing him.

Steve's folks were in town, and it was Wayne's night off. Eddie wanted a bed so that nixed the car, and now Steve knew why. He prepped himself so nicely. It would’ve been an awful waste if we hadn’t worked something out. Their hook up plans were nearly dashed till Eddie mentioned the Days Inn the town over from Hawkins. It was used by travelers only as a last resort and it was their last resort too that night.

Though it wasn't the first time.

There'd been a few nights where Steve needed to be out of his house, away from them when they were home. He knew he needed to move out, but it was so easy to be lulled back into the ease of living in his house by himself when they left. It was only when his parents were around that he remembered how acute his need to sever ties with them was. And there were the odd days when Eddie was unable to host. Having Wayne discover them was something Eddie seemed desperate to avoid. Most of the time, Steve liked it best when Eddie was home with him. Often enough they'd hang out and cook or watch TV after or in between ‘antics.’ The house would actually feel like a home, and Steve could pretend for a little while that they were actually a couple.

Steve sat up and brushed his fingers lightly over Eddie's ass cheeks, pausing to tap the base of the plug. "You gorgeous freak," he murmured. He could feel his cock dripping onto his thigh just at the sight.

"You love it," Eddie said, sticking his tongue out.

"I do."

Steve had replied in an instant, quickly regretting it. He was sure his face was painted with the amorous truth. Luckily, Eddie was headed to the bathroom to finish his preparations.

Steve lazily tugged on his cock, trying to keep his anxieties at bay. I'm about to have amazing sex because he's amazing. I'm still good with this. Just because he's into casual friends-plus-certain-benefits… it doesn't mean he wants more. And that’s okay. I’m okay. He's never talked about past relationships… only encounters and fleeting partners. That's his style. This has been working. Right?

Eddie reentered, looking sort of triumphant. As his eyes wandered to Steve's cock, the gaze turned ravenous. "Ooo I am going to ride that big boy. You've no idea. I've been thinking about it all day."

Steve's stupid heart thudded faster in his chest. Thinking about me all day? No. No, he was thinking about my cock. Though I'd take that little admission anyway. Steve was not immune to flattery, but he was wary of it. Eddie's flattery at first had confused him, bold and silly. Nowadays it just made him melt into a puddle. By the time Eddie crawled over Steve, lube in hand, he felt it in his core. More than desperation.

"Eddie, I need you.'

"Course you do handsome. That's why we're at the cheapest motel in twenty miles." Eddie was nearly giddy as he sat atop Steve. His thighs flanking Steve's, their leg hair brushing against each other's skin, as Eddie adjusted in its own delightfully light friction.

Steve was already caught up in a swirl of anticipation as Eddie rose and then gripped his cock. Steve let out a noise that sounded something like a hybrid of a moan and a sigh of relief. Eddie chuckled and dripped a generous amount of lube over the tip of Steve's cock. He wet his lips, watching Steve shudder as the cool liquid dripped down his shaft. Eddie finally angled himself so his entrance ran over Steve's head. He felt how loose his ring was against his cock.

Steve moaned again. “Eddie, fuck. Need you,” he repeated, “need to feel you.”

Eddie shut his eyes and exhaled as he sat slowly down on Steve's cock. “Ah. You've already warmed that lube up. Love how hot your body gets for me.”

Steve's eyes were slitted against the agonizingly slow pressure, fighting the urge to give in and burst. He was so sensitive. Oh. He realized that Eddie hadn't put a condom on him. They were both tested and exclusive. Barebacking had been discussed, but it was still rare for them.

“You only say that…" Steve hissed as Eddie slipped lower. "Because you have poor circulation. You're always cool."

“I don't see anything wrong with my circulation.”

Steve tore his gaze from Eddie's pink cheeks, his contorting lips, to look at his cock hanging hard. As Eddie's body came closer to fully enveloping Steve's cock. Steve’s hands reached out on the bed, his fingers anchoring in the lumpy mattress. He couldn’t trust himself to let his hands wander to Eddie when he was topping from the bottom like that. He wanted Eddie to set the pace. His mind blanked a little when Eddie slid down the remainder of the way. He began to slowly grind, rolling his hips.

“Oh fuck," Steve cried as Eddie started to move up and down. The passes were slick and steady. The plug had done its job well.

Eddie threw back his head as he rode. The tip of his cock brushed against Steve's stomach, creating a wet spot on contact. “It feels so right in me angel, just right. Heavy and good. Want you to fill me up tonight. Can't stop dreaming about it.”

“Eddie, oh.” The words were eroding Steve's ability to hold back. The tension in him built, growing unbearable with each slide of Eddie’s body’s tight grip on his cock. Steve needed release. “Please, please,” he begged. “Can I please?”

“Already? Looks like I got you worked up so good angel,” Eddie panted.

“Please Eds," Steve choked out. Even his brain felt overheated now.

Eddie grunted and sat down hard. “Come on then. Grab me. Fill me big boy.”

Steve's hands flew to Eddie's hips, his thumbs against the scarred skin he adored because it matched his own. He thrust up, bouncing Eddie above him, and then Steve let go. His orgasm drained all the tension, and in its place a rush of good flooded through him. The feeling traveled up his spine as his hips jerked upward once more. Eddie cried out a little with the added movement. He gasped as he lifted off of Steve, sprawling backward on the bed.

Steve raised his head to see his cum drip from Eddie's ass. A bit loopy and almost dizzy from the natural high, Steve readjusted so he could crawl over Eddie's thighs. He zeroed directly in on Eddie’s twitching cock. He began to suck it at a dogged pace. He let it slip further and further into his mouth till he deep throated the pulsing member. Eddie cried again, this time, some sort of warning that did quite reach Steve's lust-addled brain. He felt Eddie’s thighs tense and backed his cock out just enough to easily swallow his climax coating his tongue. He was greedy, still sucking for more even when he could tell Eddie was spent.

They both lay back on the cheap sheets, regaining their breath. Steve felt an unwelcome, post-orgasmic, clarity seep into his mind. He didn't want to be there. It was understood, neither of them wanted to sleep in the motel, but Steve wanted more than just getting out of their current location. He wanted to be in a place where he could wrap his arms around Eddie, sleep and wake in a few hours for another round. Steve's heart panged from his longing to clean up with Eddie and lay back down in soft linens. He knew that what he really wanted was to stop worrying about the time or place he and Eddie could be together.

But we aren’t ‘together.’

Eddie moved off of the bed. He stood up, and Steve visually traced his scars as they stretched with the action. The grafted skin along Eddie’s hips was especially taut and shifted as he reached his arms over each other and twisted his waist. Steve wanted his hands to be there again against his skin. Eddie cracked his neck and turned back toward the bed, shaking his hair down from his bun. He looked gorgeous. Like sin and sex and sweetness. Eddie was everything Steve desired to hold. Hundreds of moments that he wanted to share with Eddie flashed through his mind.

I can’t do this anymore. Steve scooted over to the edge of the bed and sat up."Hey. Look, it's not that I don't… I don’t want this to stop. Okay?"

Eddie looked at him suspiciously. The expression slowly shifted into one of bewilderment before he replied, "okay?"

"I don’t… love the motel, the van, the alleyway that one time." Steve tried not to think too hard about letting the word love slip out. Truthfully, I don't love the secrecy.

"The quarry." Eddie chuckled, his eyes glazing briefly. "That time in your dad's office."

Steve had a viciously visceral flashback to a desktop digging into his thighs. "Fuck. Yeah, um, those times. I want more, but like… Eddie." Steve looked at Eddie through his lashes, trying to get the right words out. "I want… more."

"Babydoll, repeating the word is uh, not really helping me out here." Eddie brought some of his hair up to his lips and his shoulders pulled inward. "’Mm not sure what you’re getting at Steve."

"Can we…" Steve groaned. Come on. I can be honest with him. He’s one of my closest friends… that I’ve fallen for. I just have to say it. Steve agitatedly ran his hands through his hair and down his face.

Eddie observed Steve’s frustration with one eyebrow cocked, his face was a mix of amusement and confusion.

Steve met Eddie’s eyes, a warm chocolate brown, softening the longer they held each other's gaze. Steve swallowed. Start small. "Can I take you out?"

Eddie shrugged. "Sure?"

Steve stood up off the bed with surprise. That was too easy, right? He pushed down slight embarrassment, remembering they were still both butt ass naked. "Sure?"

"Sure. Definitely, but, uh…” His eyes darted around the dingy room. Eddie was circling his fingers, stretching out his hair tie between both hands. “Do you one better? Steve, do you... Do you like me? Like, for real like me?"

"Yeah." Steve nervously licked his lips, staring at Eddie's while he approached, already in his space. 'Like' isn't the half of it, Steve thought wretchedly. "I really do."

"Fuck. I was hoping so." Eddie beamed back at him. Then he slipped into a slightly cockier smile. "I just needed you to be brave and tell me sweetheart."

Steve's heart leapt in his chest. 'Sweetheart' was reserved for Eddie's guitar. Everytime Eddie called him pet names there was normally a tease involved but now… He swallowed. “Eds. Look, I’ve fucked around. I didn’t know if that’s what you wanted. What you expected… but I can’t pretend like it's what I like anymore.” Eddie’s eyes flashed, a sadness tinged them. “I want to be in a relationship, y’know? Work towards having.'' Steve bit his lip and looked away, speaking so quietly he worried that Eddie might not hear him. He wasn’t ashamed of how he felt, just scared. He was terrified that Eddie wouldn’t want the same thing. “A solid, loving relationship. I want that so…”

"Hey.” Eddie's hands slotted against Steve's face, holding it so he had to face him; Eddie's thumbs were against his jaw. It didn’t feel rough or hasty like their normal touches. It felt steady, safe. “I’ve been in love with you since I saw you pick up the kids the first time. You did this crazy handshake hug thing with Henderson… Took me a while to be honest with myself about it, but I was a goner from that moment on." Eddie sighed heavily. "I also have had my heart broken by guys trying stuff out with me, so I promised myself I wouldn’t confess. Just go with it. Have fun with what I could get."

Steve gasped at the confession, and Eddie laughed at his response, kissing his lips. When he pulled back, Eddie seemed to tremble a little. Steve realized, if what he was saying was true, this was the first time Eddie was lowering that wall with him. Sex had been one thing; this was relationships, romance, love. Steve never wanted to see his wall go up again. He wanted that access, the genuine Eddie, all the time.

“Eddie, I’m sorry. I'm so sorry if I made you feel like I was toying with you.” Steve rested his hands on Eddie’s lower back, comforting himself with the contact. “I honestly… I thought this was all just what you wanted. You’re so flirty, joking all the time. I thought you hooking up with me was just… Hell,” he cursed. “I’m an idiot."

“It’s not a game for me Steve." Eddie's hands dropped down, one against Steve’s neck the other lay on his chest. Steve’s heartbeat quickened. “Not to say I don't like playing with you. But not with feelings. I’m starting to think we were both pretty big idiots here. Though the sex has been phenomenal."

Steve laughed and kissed Eddie’s cheeks and smiling mouth. "No more cheap motels?"

Steve could not think of a more endearing sight then Eddie Munson as he warmly agreed. "No more sneaking around sweetheart."

Steve's mouth went dry, and he managed to swallow before the words came tumbling out. "Move in with me?"

"Woah, what?"

"Let's get our own place.” Eddie looked at him slightly stunned, but Steve knew with absolute certainty. That's what I want. I want to be with him. “No sneaking around? Well, I’ve been in love with you since the boathouse. Eddie, I wanna come home to you."

Eddie's eyes grew a little unfocused, teary before he appeared to jolt back into himself. “Yeah. Yes."

"Yes?"

"Hell yes. But before that.” Eddie’s wicked spark was back. “We gotta sit down and make our own sex playlist. No more shuffle."

"What? You weren’t feeling ‘the rush?”’ Steve grinned back, trying to contain the boundless joy he felt growing in his chest.

He stopped Eddie's protesting groan with a kiss.

#eddie munson bingo #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie #steve x eddie #ao3 fanfic #smut #i write things #cheap motel #troye sivan #i feel the rush

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

Okay new Tails-tube short came out and I want to talk about it (mostly about Knuckles edition)

Under the cut because I go on a bit:

#1 Knuckles voice and character direction:

I absolutely love this new Knuckles voice a LOT. Of course Knuckles is being voice by Dave Mitchell, with his first Knuckles role being in Team Sonic racing where his voice there wasn't exactly bad to say but it was clearly trying tbh a bit to hard to be a Travis Willingham impression which I get for the sake of continuity but in that game at least it just seemed kind of too forced and a bit too noticeable to say at least. However, now as this short proves that he is no longer trying to do the Travis impression and is doing his own take on the character which is good!

Like I was very grown used to Travis' Knuckles when having his voice in so many games for so long and I believe personally Boom!Knuckles (at least when ignoring the canonverse Knuckles for just a moment) was definitely his best take on the character and honestly for me at least is most of the part of why Boom worked like it did, not as a sonic show but as a dorky little comedy.

Movie!Knuckles I think is what proved to me that change can absolutely work and was absolutely needed for Knuckles as a character, for so long his character had been so dumbed down and mostly just either used for jokes or incompetent decision making (look at everything he done while he was in charge in Forces) but thanks to the writing and Idris Elba's voicing it turned the page and started a new with Knuckles' portrayal, having him as warrior with honor who spent most of his time growing up alone and made it where while he's not stupid but he does have this naivety to him about how to be around people and exactly what it means to have a true friend letting the S3&K being tricked by Eggman plot line feel more natural than it did in that game. He felt like he had a healthy scale; one end being a warrior with the highest of honors and is absolutely ready to fight whatever and whenever nesscary and on the other end is naive kid new to society and learning the ends and out of what it means to have friends and family and not to be alone, throughout the movie he goes to different parts of the scale depending on the situation and the key of success here was it always felt natural when he did - both sides were him but if need be he can easily switch from one to the other if the situation called for it. It's a nice touch in my opinion and complexes his character out more.

Why do I bring this up? Because new and different voices can do very much a different direction of a character along with different writers and voice directors (there's many examples here in this franchise to take you're pick from) and here in this Tails-tube short Knuckles is proof of all of that; new voice that isn't just an impression of the previous Knuckles' one, new writers especially Ian Flynn which we know was involved with at least this short in particular thanks to one of his tweets, and we *know* there's new voice directors at least in some way while not doing the his 'new voice' for Sonic in this short but given so just how vastly different Roger's Sonic sounds in the small footage we've seen him speak in Frontiers, but even so just everyone who speaks this short sounds WAY less like their interpretations from the meta era sure they made jokes but nothing was nauseating to listen too like it was from colors-forces like you can just telling its Flynn's writing because of just how much it sounds like the IDW comics except it is more exposition dumpy but that's kind of the point of Tails-tube to give us lore and world building for maybe the younger audience who doesn't know much about the previous games so I'm fine with it.

Edit: It's actually Tyson Hesse who wrote and directed this short but pretty much my point still stands, they did an amazing job! :)

#2 Just some more things about Dave's Knuckles I noticed:

Anyway, Dave's Knuckles seems to be slowly forming his own identity in this short and will hopefully be fleshed out more in the Knuckles' prologue short (which I'll come back to later btw) so far he seems to be a lot less bullshity and more serious about his job protecting the Master Emerald than he has been in a very long time, this I'm very happy to see. Also??? This short addresses his consent leaps of absences away from the emerald and actually explains it??? That alone knocked me to the floor. Like he says he leaves to help Sonic whenever trouble he needs his help with comes around, which okay doesn't explain every situation because sometimes Knuckles is seemed just chilling around before the big bad of whatever game it is happens but again maybe there's something a little deeper there of him actually wanting to spend time with his friends just because but he doesn't want to say it out loud so that's the explanation he gives but maybe everyone around him knows that isn't truly the case but chooses not to say anything because the guy tries to keep a front of a guy only concerned with his job but actually cares a lot (which you can both see in this short given the fact even if he doesn't seem impressed or to get why Tails is doing his little internet show he still calls him though concerned at first that he was in danger but still stays on the line to answer Tails' interview questions and even oblivously in that older brother-like way teases him a bit about throwing him off the island for wanting to do tests on the Emerald even though the fox can fly, which was sweet. It's only when Sonic appears that he switches it up back to that front and breaks the camera. So... tsudere a little? Maybe but honestly it was never overbearing or all that noticeable that I think it kind of works and which I find cute but at least Sega is finally remembering that Sonic and Knuckles are also rivals even though their relationship is definitely better than Sonic and Shadow's rivalry which is, you know, more of a cliche hot-mess.

Knuckles' reaction to Rouge just being mentioned was funny.

Not Boom!Knuckles quality of jokes, which is good, but the fucking rock bit was also funny so good thing to know they're trying to regain balance which comedy when it comes to Knuckles' character, afterall even in S3&K comedy was indeed a part of his character (look at the him alone in that game trying not to fall scene and his boss fight being... a joke in itself) "I don't chuckle-" line in his SA2 theme when literally in his first interaction with Sonic that's what he does. ALL OF HIS THEMES IN SA1&2. Literally all of his in game animations in Sonic Riders. This face:

Yeah they might've dumb down his character over the years and went overboard with the jokes but that's not to say the jokes weren't always there, even indirectly. And that's what makes it work, make him indirectly funny.

When asked about if he what to know more about the Master Emerald he straight up gives the most SA1!Knuckles ass response which it's fitting given his SA1 theme is playing the entire time.

They are straight up hinting at some kind of new form for him involving the emerald in some way, I fucking swear. I feel it in my gut.

Anyway I love him.

#3 Frontiers.

Giving the fact they literally state so in the ending, just happens directly before Frontiers with them mentioning picking up Amy to come and join them. A few things:

Knuckles is still on the island so I'm also assuming the Knuckles prologue takes places right after this short. But we know he's going to also be on the Starfall Islands and is most likely also going to be saved like Amy and probably also Tails so exactly what is going to go down in the prologue animation that is also going to drag him also into cyberspace? Something also having to do with the emeralds?

Speaking of which; they are REALLY hamming in hamming in the roles of the emeralds, which I think is good given its been SO long since they had actual importance in a game. And we know we're getting super sonic at least maybe a few times each on every island given there's some bosses you can only fight using him... but that leaves one question what about the final boss of this game? Are we just going to use maybe a more powered up version of super sonic? Or maybe something else? Who knows 🤷🏻‍♂️

The glitches around the image of Starfall Islands. We know their connected to cyberspace so its not surprising that their glitchy but Tails said the chaos emeralds... lead/shown him the islands? How? I know their magic and all that but don't you think it's strange? Exactly how are these two places connected where the emeralds would sense them enough to want to go there? We know they have a subconscious of their own and thanks to Origins we see them travel as they please but why there? It's mysterious and I'm actually invested into learning more about it which is something I don't say going into many sonic games in recent years. I'm very excited.

#4 Prime.

Nothing in this short particularly made me want to talk about it but I wanted to talk about it anyway. So we know Sonic Prime is canon and it's Sonic is supposed to be gameverse!Sonic in some form. It's been speculated and rumored to come out in December and with the recent trailer confirming a winter 2022 release window I think that's very much plausible and at least says one thing: it's coming after Frontiers. Why am I bringing this up? Because I have a question:

Do you think since Prime from what we understand is canon takes place before or after Frontiers?

I'm asking because we know from interviews that Sonic is going to go through a character arc in Prime due to him supposedly being responsible for the dimensional rift or whatever and feels guilty over it and his motivation is to fix it and make things right.

We also know that in Frontiers Sonic is going to go through a similar situation and at least we're going to get a bit more character from him.

It's probably not going to be confirmed and we are kind of only left to guess until we have the game in our hands/watch the show to its fullest but given the two release not that far from each other which would make more sense coming first? Or maybe given the whole different dimension thing maybe (and this is just pure fan theory) they could both be 'versions' of gameverse!Sonic but also be parallels of either the same/similar event that comes out to the same result: improving Sonic's character and address some hidden things over the surface he's hiding (using some of the lines about fear and stuff from the Frontiers main theme as evidence here)

I don't know, we're kind of left in the dark on this one until we get both 🤷🏻‍♂️

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #knuckles the echidna #miles tails prower #sonic frontiers #sonic prime #tails tube #moosh gives his dumb opinions #non request related

[hangingslothcentral]

Hello- sliding in with some creator-based questions! 1. How long do you spend on research for shows? Is it all done at the very beginning or more search for things when you need to?

2. How do you get more comfortable and confident writing longer monologues without feeling like you've lost a listener's attention? Is it in the background sound? Is it in long and fancy words? Hope the real-life horrors aren't consuming your whole soul! - Cry MJ

Hi!!! These are great Qs thanks for asking!!!

Research for stuff is really on going and developing as I make a project. I spend a significant chunk of time at the very beginning of a project reading around the subject areas involved to try to get a sense of whether or not it's something that will be able to hold my interest over a long period of time. Show making, as you know, means you're living with your project for hundreds of hours. It's every bit as big of a commitment as writing a novel, and more of one, if it's a multiseason show. It's kind of like compatility in relationships; you gotta scope out whether or not you're going to work out long-term at the beginning, and a good way to do that is research. Second to this, though, most of my shows are about something I'm coming in with a high base amount of knowledge of in one way or another. I read medical journals for fun, for example, so research for NQD is just building on existing knowledge and stuff. Sometimes there will be a specific area of interest I need to swot up in, like tarot for SBR. Research for shows very much on-going and grows along with the project.

2. I actually really struggle to recognise my work as being any good despite reassurannce from others. Instead, I dedicate huge amounts of time to practicing my craft. Writing is one of those things where the best way to improve is to do. It may not necessarily make you more confident, but it might help you find a loophole to bypass the self-doubt, which is what I find. Whilst I can't trust that my work is good, I CAN trust that I've definitely put the hours in to making it as good as I can personally make it, and that's usually enough to get me over the hump. Trust your audience, too; they have tuned into your show bc they like it, most of the time. You aren't holding them hostage. If they don't like the thing, that's fine, they'll just leave! Someone else WILL like it. Make the thing for them, instead. Another thing is to trust the characters. Why are they speaking this long in this way, uninterrupted? It's usually because they have something important or extremely interesting to say so let them speak! Sometimes, shy, reclusive characters will break up a monologue with hedging phrases, saying 'if that makes sense' or 'you know' to solicit feedback from their audience, whoever the audience is. It can be a good trick for a nervous writer worrying their Big Speech is overstaying its welcome. In short; make sure your monologues are in character, trust that you as a writer have done the work and are good at what you do, and trust that the audience who will enjoy your character's 4 minute rant about dead plants will come along and when they do, they'll love it so so much.

I hope this was interesting and helpful!! --- Eira xxxx

#eira speaks

[olderthannetfic]

Do you or your readers have any opinions on formatting dream sequences in fic? Or any thoughts on what makes a good one? To italicise or not to italicise... to signpost early or reveal at the end... what do people love or not love about dream sequences? (Apologies if this has been asked before)

--

You know, I don't think it has been asked before, actually.

For me personally, I usually like it signposted early if it's going to be a long sequence, but it depends on what function the dream is serving in your story.

--

Italics are acceptable, but reading huge blocks of them can be a pain. In many cases, it's probably best to begin the dream at a chapter break or big scene division, then make it crystal clear in the text when it ends (starting a paragraph with "X woke" or something) rather than using a lot of formatting of the dream itself.

However, it depends entirely on the structure of the work. If it's a fic that is punctuated by little snippets of dream that grow and eventually reveal the whole dream, recontextualizing the fic thus far, I'd absolutely put the few little dream paragraphs in italics. They'd be visual dividers between different parts of the fic.

--

I can't think of anything I love about them. I can think of many things I hate, but they all boil down to "Why is this here?"

A dream sequence should serve a purpose in the fic, so if it turns into too many paragraphs of impenetrable purple prose, I'll feel like it has overstayed its welcome and is no longer serving a good purpose. Even if it's short and well-written, I'll still get annoyed if it doesn't seem to be well integrated into the rest of the story.

Think about how dream sequences are used in other media.

Plenty of tv episodes have a character waking from a prophetic dream. They worry about it. Eventually, when the events come to pass, they either avert disaster because of the dream or the real events turn out to technically match the dream but are completely different from what the character and audience assumed. These dreams add foreshadowing, set up up irony, or raise the stakes.

Some dream sequences show what a character is worried about and thus are character development. Maybe the dream itself shows this. Maybe the dream is them being a villain or being into weird sex or whatever, and it's only when they wake that they go "Oh no! What does this mean?!" That reaction is the point and the existence of the dream sequence should serve it.

Some dream sequences exist to show that a character has been given hallucinogens, a psychic is messing with their mind, etc.

Once in a while, a fic has a tragic dream, and then the character wakes up and everything is fine. The one I recall like this that I actually enjoyed was a BTS fic where the point was the dreamer going and getting cuddles from another member after waking up. The whole thing contrasted their music video AU with their real lives. What I liked was that observation of how weird it would be to spend time on an AU of yourself that's sad and awful and how it would mess with you. It wasn't just that a character had a scary dream and then got comforted: there was a bit more specific reason to show that dream on-page.

A fic needs a twist, coda, or commentary other than "It was all a dream! LOL!"

Bad versions of dream sequences (which are numerous, I'm sorry to say) tend to just rely on "Surprise! It was fake!" If you just wipe out everything that has happened, then the emotional stakes you set up within the dream don't matter. You're telling the reader that the story doesn't matter.

It is crucial that the dream have lasting, real world impact.

The dreamer realizes something about their own feelings that they didn't before the dream. The dream is literally prophetic and changes how the character reacts. The dream is imposed by an outside force on purpose. It can be a realistic, internal, emotional impact. It can be a sff plot device where the dream is more than just a regular dream. But there has to be something.

Otherwise, you're writing filler, and your fic would probably be stronger without it.

[neoyi]

Watched The Sea Beast.

It's a decent, solid film. Gets across its plot without really doing much more with it, but what it does, it does fine. I was surprised on the frequent use of vulgar language and its cavalier mentions of death - the latter a significant part of the Hunter lifestyle - but they don't go overboard with it and I feel it's both tonally appropriate for the setting and the film's all-age audience.

The movie is also good about NOT peppering it with lame ass cringe jokes, dated references, and crass humor. The dialect is largely what you'd expect from seafarers of the 18th century and they treat the way these characters speak with gravity.

It's also really cool to see the cast, from royal soldiers to the scruffiest hunter, comprised of multiple people of differing gender and skin color (the main character herself being black, for example.) My personal favorite character is First Mate Sarah: no-nonsense, loyal, and an absolute badass.

Major chops for giving her wrinkles instead of just making her look like A Woman Who Plot Tells Us Is Old But Looks Like She's Still Twenty. Sarah is not only visibly aged, but she looks like she has lived so long that she has stories to tell and advises to give.

There are some mild kerfuffle I had with the movie:

So the Hunters have a bet with the King and Queen to snag the fabled Red Bluster, the beast that has yet to be caught, or risk their alliance with them in favor of their in-house hunters. But this strategically makes zero sense. The royal couple is cutting loose an entire group for continuously losing one beast in spite of the dozens they've successfully killed over generations? The same hunters that are routinely revered by the kingdom's citizens that secretly make it easier for the royal family to spread their pro-kill-the-monster propaganda? Why would ya go and screw that up?

Man, Maisie changed her mind about being a Hunter pretty quickly the minute she realizes the Red Bluster was harmless. I suppose this is counterbalanced by Jacob who takes longer to accept the beasts didn't start the war, but she was so goddamn gung-ho until she spends all but five minutes with Red and then decides to alter her entire perception without conflict. I suppose it is a lot easier to get away with this when you're a child and hadn't been as deeply indoctrinated as Jacob has spent all his life. But still. There's even a point of emotional contention where Maisie's parents died fighting against the many sea monsters and this doesn't cause her to at least go a little back and forth on this issue?

The movie establishes Captain Crow and Jacob's father-son relationship pretty firmly in the beginning. How Jacob forms and grows as a character (both in his desire to be a Hunter vs. learning the truth, and his own fatherly relationship with Maisie) is in direct conflict with what his adopted dad has taught him all his life. Their relationship is a crucial part (perhaps the crucial) of the movie and the final resolution between the two kinda fizzles out at the very end. The amount of sympathy and levelheaded Crow possessed at the start of the movie meant his downfall into desperate vengeance, only to end it without a conclusion is a detriment to his character. Like Jacob rebels against his father figure, yeah, but after, Crow just kind of vanishes from the epilogue with no hint of what ever became of him or his crew. For that matter, it's only implied the King and Queen's secret (that they started the war against the beast) is probably gonna be dealt with. Probably. Who knows. I guess I'm disappointed because of all people worth a redemption, it was Crow (like, come on, man, the movie made it clear the real villain was goddamn rich people, why drag the ol' captain into this) and brushing him off at the last minute did him no favors, nor his bond with Jacob.

But yeah. A couple of clumsiness aside, The Sea Beast is good background noise. At the least, if you like oceanic adventures and aesthetic, seafarers and nautical beasts, and 18th century background (ME ME ME. I love all this shit), then it's at least got that down pat.

#the sea beast #netflix #neoyi talks

[wlwtfock]

XDDDD maybe they did watch wynonna earp, only difference is waves and nicole were both adults and the actors too, so way less uncomfortable to watch once again, i hope we get an interview where they're like "yeah it was our idea to do that" or that they were totally comfortable doing it... but honestly even then, it was still too much in my opinion... and yeah, not only could that conversation have happened like a week ago, but also, this conversation could have been longer. i saw someone comment that Bobbie was finally opening up and they wished the conversation would've been longer. also, someone else said that the vibe was really off, like they wish this would've ended in a warm hug and cuddling, i agree with that too. but that's more of a personal preference, i never liked teary kisses and sex, how do you feel about these things? overall the writing is just so all over the place... i also think it was really good to show anais take the initiative this time because in all the other intimate scenes, it was bobbie who made the first move, so it's good to finally see a back and forth and not just bobbie being the one who seems to want sex all the time and anais just goes along with it (which is what it felt like to me at some points in the season, tho obviously anais was able to refuse in that one clip where she said she was uncomfortable and bobbie immediatly backed off, which i thought was a very good clip btw, dunno how you felt about that one) this is a very long ask, i'm sorry about that, it's just that you have interesting things to say so, :)

I agree to everything you said apart from me having interesting things to say 🤣🤣

No, in seriousness I mentioned before that what excites me more is emotional connection on screen and you know a story that moves me. Especially when it comes to sapphics. We deserve fully rounded and complex stories and not just coming out experiences.

But I'm getting off track, so back to these two. I get the portrayal cus if I think back what I was getting up to at their age, I would say skam is doing well in the portrayal of teenagers discovering themselves. And personally I get annoyed watching a show of highschool kids and the actors are clearly much older and look and dress like adults rather than kids.. so there's that.

And every country has its own regulations on actors ages etc, and each actor will also have their comfort zones etc and the target audience is going to be young adults, right? And I do also think that it's important to also show a same sex relationship for young adults without leaving out intimate parts of the story as we often see. I never had representation like this growing up until the l word came out and it was like 0.0 and again, adults- yes but what I would have given to see myself on screen as a teenager, you know?

These clips aren't for us, fine. But we're still invested in the story because it's so good to see representation and sapphic content. And I know both actors would be fully on board with how they are portraying this story, so it's all good from my point of view.

We deserved more clips of them working it all out and they could have even dragged out the reconciliation, we love angst am I right?

#ask #wtfock #anobbie #anais x bobbie #anaïs x bobbie #skam belgium