#and i don't want to forgive myself and tell myself its ok i look like this.

[blue-sadie]

Fuck Them Both

Neteyam x Nerd Reader x Lo'ak

Series Masterlist

Prt 3 of the Fucking The Nerd Series

Summary: neteyam needs a goodbye present before he goes off to college

Warning: hair pulling, double penetration, slut shaming, aged up characters

Yn/3rd person pov

"What the fuck" lo'ak yelled as he barged into the room neither me or neteyam moved we didn't care "what little bro jealous" neteyam grinned "why the fuck" lo'ak screeched looking at me.

"Because lo'ak don't you know the saying what comes around goes around" I murmured getting comfortable on neteyams chest "but my brother" he hissed I glared at him "you don't see me complaining about you fucking kanu" I hissed.

He looked kinda taken a back at my words "look yn me fucking kanu doesn't mean you can fuck my brother" he muttered and started pacing back and forth.

"No offense bro but she can fuck whoever she wants" neteyam muttered and carefully lifted me off of him and grabbed his discarded shirt for me to cover myself with.

"I'm quickly gonna go shower" he murmured to me softly and kissed my forehead before disappearing into the bathroom.

I put his shirt on and got comfortable in the bed and watched as lo'ak shifted uncomfortably "how was she" I muttered making him growl out "why do you care so much anyways" he muttered pulling at his hair.

I sigh irritated that he doesn't remember "do you remember what you told me" I asked as my eyes glossed with tears "was that all a lie just to get into my pants".

He sighed out "no it wasn't" he huffed sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing his face "then why fuck kanu, why ignore me" I muttered "I don't know" he whispered only making me roll my eyes.

I looked around the room not looking in his direction it was covered in different colleges logos and posters "when is neteyam leaving" I asked "in a few days" lo'ak sighed.

A part of me wanted to forgive him but the other wanted me to slap him, we waited in silence for neteyam to return.

He returned wearing nothing but sweats I watched closely as he bumped shoulders with lo'ak as he came to sit next to me.

Lo'ak growled as neteyam put his arm around me and stormed off "he was always like a baby" he chuckled as he took out his laptop to put a movie on.

We sat in silence watching the movie it was a boring action movie i shifted in his arms trying to get comfortable "hey whats wrong" he asked shifting himself to look at me.

"I don't know" i murmured he looked at me thinking about something "you like him don't you" he whispered tilting his head i looked away nervously "i-i don't know" i stuttered.

He chuckled lowly and and turned my face to his "i know you do but he does as well" i looked at him weirdly "he never shut up about the thing that happened between you to after you left" he chuckled.

He began listing the things that lo'ak did "then why would he fuck kanu" i murmured i stared down at my lap not wanting to meet his gaze "listen yn he does like you but you can't teach a old dog new tricks so quick".

I rolled my eyes "lo'ak get in here" he called out and a few minutes later lo'ak stomped in "what" he grumbled not meeting our gaze "nothing i was just telling yn about how you couldn't stop talking about her when she left" lo'ak looked panicked as neteyam spoke.

"N-no" he stuttered crossing his arms "well brother yn in here feels the same" he smiled rubbing his hand over my arm lo'ak stared at me with anger "then why fuck my brother" he muttered walking closer.

"Dude chill out you fucked kanu and not her, so its not her fault" neteyam sighed, lo'ak rolled his eyes huffing out "ok im sorry yn i shouldn't have done that" he murmured.

"Me as well" i whispered looking up at him "now that i sorted your relationship out can i get my going away present" neteyam smiled putting his hands behind his head.

I tilted my head "what gift" i asked "well i was hoping for another round" he murmured and started kissing my neck my eyes shifted to lo'ak "dude what" lo'ak muttered "i didn't mean just me" he chuckled.

His eyes became half lidded as they flickered between me and lo'ak "fuck yes" lo'ak muttered and growled out as neteyam pulled me onto his lap "come here baby" he muttered pulling me into a kiss.

Lo'ak crawled on the bed behind me his hands running under my shirt moving them up to my breasts "fuck i forgot how good these feel" he growled kissing my neck.

Neteyam's lips molded against mine as lo'ak slowly ripped off my shirt "f-fuck" i moaned my body slowly started grinding against them i ran my hands up and down neteyam's chest.

Lo'ak and neteyam removed their clothes, lo'ak pushed me into neteyam's chest as he pushed into me, my back arched as my nails scratched neteyam's chest.

"dam bro shes still wet" he growled and waited for neteyam to push in as well "a-aw" i cried out at the stretch they both groaned out they slowly started moving.

They groaned and growled with each thrust my eyes rolling as they stretched me out "fuck shes so hot" neteyam yelled out as he threw his head back against the pillow.

Lo'ak put his hands on my shoulder using it's leverage to guide me back against their cocks "look shes going stupid" neteyam growled, my eyes started becoming cross eyed and my head started to drip.

neteyam chuckled and used one of his hands to clasp my hair pulling me back causing my moans to heighten lo'ak groaned and started to thrust faster.

"Sh-shit shes starting to tighten" he laughed out loudly and as their cocks started to twitch i felt myself began to cum "fuck i-im gonna c-cum" i cried out.

I threw my head back as my legs started to tense and shake they groaned out as they filled my pussy with their cum and muttered praises to me as the maneuvered us so i was sandwiched between them.

"this is the best fucking present ever"

Tag.List

@avatar4eva @lik0 @greekgods15 @sweetirilly

#avatar #avatar pandora #avatar x reader #avatar way of water #avatar x reader smut #avatar smut #neteyam #neteyam x reader #neteyam x reader smut #lo'ak #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak x reader smut #neteyam x reader x lo'ak #neteyam x reader x lo'ak smut

[theghosttrain]

I haven't been seeing bill kaulitz smut so I am just gonna make this also forgive me this is my first smut<3

"Princess"

Warnings:Dombill!,Subfemreader!,Breeding,Cheating,Rough sex,Name calling,Degradation(Plz tell me if I missed any❤️)

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Y/N's Pov

It all happ so fast I don't know what came over me one second bill was comforting me and next I was underneath him his slim yet muscular body engulfed me in a blanket of Adultery love I didn't want it to end not for a single second...

"Hey don't cry Y/N he was a fucking jerk"Bill said as I cried into his chest my boyfriend had just cheated on me and I didn't know who go to thankfully bill dropped in for a surprise visit how I loved his smell,His hair,his eyes his smile I loved him "I-i know it just hurts because I trusted him and I love him"I said as I whipped away my tears "You shouldn't let men like (Ex's name) get to you, your gorgeous,Stunning,confident"Bill said as his brushed a lock of my hair from my face his lips were so close to mine I don't know why but I kissed him I knew it was wrong but fuck it felt so right he tasted like cigarettes and strawberries a weird mix yes but it was amazing "Y/N" He moaned into the kiss his arms wrapped around my waist pulling me close to him "Yes bill?" I said as looked up into his soft brown eyes clouded with lust "I need you" Bill said as he ran his hands up and down my body his hands exploring ever inch of my body once we broke up the kiss I looked into his eyes "Then take me" I said in a flirtatious voice with that bill pinned me to my bed it really turned me on as bill kissed my neck he trailed down my body striping me off clothes untill he reached my womanhood "Your so fucking wet you really are a dirty slut" Bill said befor wrapping his lips around my sensitive clit "Mhm~" I moaned out feeling bill chuckle sending shock waves threw my body "Your so responsive princess" Bill said as he moved up and kissed my lips "Ready princess?" Bill said as he striped his clothes off his slim muscular body I took a deep breath when I saw his member it was bigger then I imagined and thick too "As ready as I can be" I mentally cursed at myself for saying that "Haha ok princess lay down princess" Bill said in a flirtatious voice as I layed down I watched him line his cock up to my womanhood "This might hurt I'm sorry" Bill said as he kissed me slowly push into my Tight women hood in the process it hurt it felt like he was ripping me open i knew he could tell by the way he squeezed my hand "I'm sorry princess" He said as he whiped away a tear the fell "I-its ok " he kissed me once more giving me time to adjust to his size after a while he started to slowly move in and out my wet cunt "F-Fuck: I breathly moaned feeling his cock hit deep inside me "You so tight" He mumbled into my neck once he felt me fully adjust his pase quickened his hands gripped my waist leaving bruises behind "B-Bill~" I moaned out as he let out a low grunt "Such a fucking slut taking your best friends cock" Bill said as he grabed my legs throwing them over his sholders hitting my g-spot "H-Holy shit R-right there" I moaned my nails digging into his back "Haha gonna cum my slut? huh gonna cum all over this fucking cock Say it" Bill hissed out one of his hands making there way to Chest pinching and pulled at my sensitive nipple "I-i'm G-Gonna C-cum on you C-cock" I moaned out my mind Fogged over with pleasure as bill chuckled "I know what you want baby say it Say you want me to breed yoyr sluty body" Bill hissed out as he slammed into my cunt at an in human speed "F-fucking H-hell ah b-breed me~" I moaned as bill as bill smirked and kissed my neck leaving purple marks all over my neck "Y-Your gonna look so fucking hot all swollen with my baby" He choked out feeling his climax coming near "B-bill i- I'm close" I moaned as he spoke "S-same" He pushed my legs to my chest and slammed into me I gasped as I came on his cock his cock pulsating inside me spilling every last drop of his seed into my womb "Fuck" I breathed out as bill kept his softening cock inside my pussy "Gonna make sure you take my seed" he chuckled "bill" I said as i closed my eyes "Yes Y/N?"Bill said as he pulled out "I love you" He smiled and picked me up bridal style "i love you too princess come on let's get you cleaned up" can we watch a movie after and order food?" I asked happily "Sure princess"

#bill kaulitz x reader smut #bill kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz x fem reader #tokio hotel x reader #bill kaulitz #tokio hotel smut #bill kaulitz smut

[sidsinning]

 My girl Cinderella never once looked to be saved by a man, never once dreamed of a prince coming to rescue her.

(It ain't wrong to want a prince to save you but having that trope be part of so many female characters especially coming from male writers is blegh so I am appreciative to the ones who don't)

After the spell wore off she was like "ok, I was super into this guy, but realistically I probably won't see him again. That's ok, the experience itself is something I will treasure. I'm just grateful for the night of freedom I had to myself overall."

Like??? She's so real legit. She did not just focus on the prince and his handsome face for the rest of the movie. This is why she's (supposedly) the oldest Disney princess yalls 💅💅💅

She knows she isn't being treated right but has to deal with the cards she's dealt. She KNOWS a loud rebellion would get her nowhere which is what she tells Bruno in the beginning of the movie when he acts up after being mistreated by the cat. Which is 1000% the reality of any child coping in an abusive household, and she knows it.

(Literally wtf she has to give a dog advice bc she related to its mistreatment; like her family puts her almost at the same level as a dog and she knows it)

Girl is smart and pragmatic. Logical. She gets mad and frustrated, but knows she needs to hold those emotions back to not be punished further by her step family which would only make her life even harder. She balances out risk and reward.

Which is why the fairy godmother is such an iconic figure. An abused and lonely child who's only dealt with the harsh realities and mind games of life, of maturing far sooner than she should've, getting to throw it all away for one night to embrace magic and freedom? The absolute dream come true she's always wanted.

Oh and I am totally forgiving towards the romance being stale. That the prince was just decoration for her journey and everybody knows it. Mans was there to be her arm candy and I'm here for it. It never got unnecessary screentime or infringed on her story and independence. I chalk it up to a purely fairytale element to sweeten the happily ever after ending.

(Fr think about it. The MAN being the background arm candy to a woman in 1950s American cinema. Ain't no way.)

Also we got his goofy wild ass in Cinderella 3 so redemption is complete

#Shes not naive shes a realist #shes kind but never to the point of being dumb #like girl aint sharing none of that grace with the damn cat lol #cinderella #sidrabbles #disney

[emoani]

summary: the sith lord darth vader is in love with you and your baby blue dress

pairing: darth vader x f!reader

warnings: insinuation of sex, vader in love, but still an evil sith lord

observation: i dedicate this post to my corazón @fuckmyskywalker because his favorite color is blue

▪︎baby blue dress▪︎

You run your hands through your hair, smoothing it down for the thousandth time. Until you hear his breathing. Vader has finally arrived, and that makes you excited.

- Are you getting ready for our special night, honey? Have you already chosen what you are going to wear? -His voice comes out through the modulator, he was looking for you anxiously in that big suite, but he doesn't see you.

- It's a surprise - You tease him, with a smile on your lips, you were hiding somewhere in the room so he wouldn't find you, even knowing he could do it quickly with force.

- Ok, darling. I'll do my best to guess. Will I get to know what you're wearing tonight? - Vader joins in the fun.

- At night... - You pause pretending to think - I won't wear anything!

The Lord takes a while to answer you, his breathing gets faster. You had managed to affect him with so little and it was so much fun.

- Honey... Please say you're going to use something...

You laugh at him.

- Yes love. I'll wear it, usually in front of others.

- Don't make me anxious, my dear. What are you going to wear for our special night?

- A long baby blue dress - You describe what you were wearing at the time and walk slowly towards him, feeling his anxiety.

- Forgive me, but I have to be honest... You're going to look like a goddess, dressed in a baby blue dress... Your eyes and hair match the blue so well - As he's talking you approach and poke his shoulder. He, anxious, can't stop touching you from your hair to your beautiful blue dress. He is in love with what he sees - Baby, you look beautiful, my love...

You laugh, so happy as you wrap your arms around your man to hug him. You loved him so much.

- Who knew that one would say I would see a Lord so in love like this - you think aloud.

- Honey, I feel like a seventeen-year-old boy by your side. I won't be able to take my eyes off you all night!

His voice might not be able to convey that much emotion, but how could you not be moved by those words? Vader could look so bad to other people, but not to you because you understood him. And that's why he loved you. You understood why he ended up that way, you waited for him for years until he allowed someone into his heart again. You loved that bad guy. And he didn't care what people said. You loved him so much that you would always be there for him, follow him to every planet and ignore the bodies he would leave lying around.

- I don't get used to so many compliments - you says blushing.

- Don't worry. When I marry you, I will always give you compliments. I will always tell you how beautiful you are, how perfect you are for me, how you are the woman of my life...

Its robotic arms were around your waist, holding you as tight as if you were going to walk away.

- I'm looking forward to kissing you now. But I'll control myself until dinner time... give me a hug, I'll control myself until later.

You can't not laugh about it all. Oh, how she loved him.

- How will dinner work, since you can't eat with me? - Worried question - Won't you mind?

It wasn't the first time you said that. Ever since you started planning this night, you've been insisting that you can skip that part. But Vader always said he wanted to give you the full experience of a romantic night. That included dinner. He made it very clear that it wasn't an option to skip this part, however you were so insistent.

- We've already talked about this - He reminds you, walking around the room - I don't care, as long as I'm with you, my dear. I will feed myself with your beauty, with your personality, with your presence, with the air you breathe, with the same air you exhale when you kiss me. I'll be by your side, watching you eat... To be honest: I'll be very focused on you; I want to see every little bite you take...

So passionate.

- You're obsessed with me, so glad I am with you too

- I'm a Sith Lord, but I'm the most passionate being you've ever seen.

(...)

You continued exchanging flirtations the entire time. As you walked, while Vader chose a good ship to take you to the planet he chose just for that night.

The whole place was beautiful, as well as the dinner. The place he took you to was more romantic than he expected. The walls with glass chandeliers. The soft wood floors, and the brightly lit stairs. There are roses on the ceiling. It's all perfect.

And the dinner that Vader insisted so much on was great, and once again you imagined what it would be like if that accident on Mustafar had not happened, you were sad to think that he could no longer feel and enjoy certain things.

- Honey - Vader says and you know he was in your thoughts - I'm feeling good now. We still have the whole night ahead of us.

You finish eating and thank him. The androids begin to silently clear the food from the table.

- I'm anxious to know where this night will take us - You observe.

- I can use my mind to show you a little what awaits you. Do you feel, my love?

You, still sitting, raise an eyebrow without quite understanding what he is saying. Seconds later you tremble all over, feeling an invisible touch between your legs. Was he really teasing you like that? You bite your lip and lower your head in embarrassment. You were out in public, by the way. Even if there was no one else in the place besides the androids.

- So, my queen? Are you feeling my rage? My desire to have you in that blue dress?

You squeeze your own thigh, trying in vain to contain the trembling in your legs as he, through the Force, touches you.

- Vader, please... - You ask softly - Not here.

- Here, yes. Do you think you have the right to deny me something? - He speaks each word slowly, as if he wasn't doing anything - I demand to be rewarded.

And you who were being stimulated the whole time, trying to hold your breath, don't even think about stopping it. Who did you want to fool? He was the Sith Lord, your Lord and he could boss you around and do whatever he wanted. And he knows it.

- As you wish - You answer, making your submission clear.

#anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #darth vader fanfic #darth vader x f!reader #darth vader x reader #darth vader x you #anakin x you #anakin x y/n #star wars x reader

[brainworms-all-night-long]

Ever since I had the realization that I can just make an inmedias res of the idea that randomly attacks me without bothering myself with the boring context stuff around I've gotten quite the boost to write!!

This idea specifically popped into my head and was almost fully fleshed out while I was vacuuming the house last Sunday, enjoy

[2,350 words]

---

"I don't need you to defend me y'know."

With shaking hands, Nine had anger bubbling inside of him every time his gloves got caught on the flimsy fabric of the bandage.

"By that you're implying I should've just let them rip into you like that?"

"It's none of your business." The fox grumbled and exercised every inch of self-control he had to not just rip the bandage away and Sonic's whole arm with it.

It was stupid, it was so so stupid, and Nine felt beyond guilty, but more than that he was angry.

Angry at Sonic for being an idiot, but what's new really.

"Hmm, pretty sure it was, I do not let bullying happen when I see it."

"That wasn't bullying-"

"We won't argue the definition of that word right now."

The hedgehog gave him a cheeky grin and rested his chin on the palm of his hand. The elbow of the hand was in turn propped up on his leg that bounced seventy-five kilometers an hour, which caused his whole body to shake, which, made Nine irritated even more because he couldn't get the bandage wrapped just right.

But he was done telling the other to stop moving, it was obvious he couldn't sit still for more than ten seconds. Not to mention that just getting him to sit down and get his infection prone, bleeding wound treated was incredibly difficult to begin with.

Besides that, how did Sonic have it in him to smile at him after having his fur stained with his own blood.

...After the taste of its iron was still fresh in Nine's mouth.

"Ok then let me rephrase; I don't want you to defend me." Nine could do that himself no problem. He could make anyone trying to hurt him run the other way if he really wanted to. He would've done just that had Sonic not been an idiot and gotten in the way.

"Then let me rephrase as well; I won't let anyone bully you when I can do something about it."

"I didn't ask for your help." Nine hissed and pulled the bandage just a bit too tight out of spite. Sonic didn't seem to notice.

"You never do."

"Because I don't need it."

"Uh-huh." Sonic hummed, unimpressed, his head slumping deeper in his palm.

The hedgehog fell silent after that. Nine dared just the quickest peek at his face and saw a solemn expression. Whatever, his reaction didn't matter, the wound was taken care of after he carefully used a medical pin to hold together the loose end of the bandage, he was done here.

He was about to put all the used supplies back in the medical kit, call it a day and disappear from everyone's radar until things have died down.

Sonic had different plans it seemed, as he just used his injured hand to grab onto Nine's and stopped him in his tracks.

"We're friends. Right Nine?"

Nine didn't answer, didn't lift his gaze from the bag of medical pins he was holding, didn't let go of the lingering backdrop of guilt lacing his throat.

"Friends rely on each other. Trust each other and help one another."

And he didn't like the tone of voice Sonic was using. It was too soft, almost sickly sweet, and too forgiving. But even with its many charms, it would not work on Nine, he knew what the hedgehog was getting at.

"I can rely on myself pretty well." He replied sternly and once again spared just a quick look at the other, making sure there was an appropriate amount of apathy in it. Then his eyes fell onto the bandaged arm, still holding his own, and lingered.

"And friends don't hurt each other to the point they draw blood, do they."

Nine knew very little about this whole friendship thing still, but this one was pretty obvious, he didn't need to ask.

"No, but they can make the necessary sacrifices for each other when it counts."

At that, all the bubbling frustration reached a boiling point, and Nine might've given into it just a bit too much.

He ripped his hand away, the pang of regret and guilt went buried under the much preferred anger as he gripped the bag of medical pins tighter, looking for something over the bed they were sitting on, he just needed something to exemplify his point.

There, lying about, he grabbed the surgical scissors and tossed them into the open metal box, causing a loud clatter and almost flipping the whole thing over.

"A necessary sacrifice as in having me almost kill you!?"

The action did its job to finally get the hedgehog in a more alarmed state, as he should be.

"Woa woa, it's gonna take way more than just one bite and stab to put me six feet under buddy! I thought that was pretty well established by now!" Sonic waved both his hands in front of him in a panicked surrender.

Nine then wordlessly glared at him. He knew Sonic was tough, he knew. But he also caught on the habit of the hedgehog downplaying his injuries and grievances towards others, and Nine couldn't stand that.

"Something tells me that the bite hurts you more than it hurts me."

"It, It doesn't hurt me." Nine took a second to harden his features further, but couldn't look Sonic in the face at all "Just pisses me off."

Another tense bead of silence during which Sonic only looked like someone spilled a hot coffee mug over him.

Nine sighed in resignation. He should shut up, talking just made everything worse today it seemed.

He finally dragged the medical box to himself, throwing all of the supplies into it in a somewhat organized way so it could be closed properly with a doubled click.

He continued staring at the two old-fashioned clips holding the lid and the bottom of the box together, all while the anger inside of him melted and froze over in a pool of guilt that only kept increasing in its volume as seconds ticked by.

"You want me to be angry at you, don't you."

Bingo.

Despite just deciding hes done talking, the "You should be" was said way louder than Nine intended.

"There's nothing for me to be angry about though."

He gripped the corners of the aid kit as he finally met the hedgehog face to face.

"There is- the, I BIT YOU!" He stammered over his words, dumbfounded, as if Sonic just couldn't get the most obvious thing in the world. "How is that something to NOT be mad about?!"

Sonic simply averted his gaze, gently rubbing his injury. "I mean, I can't stay angry at anyone for long, even if I wanted to."

Nine wilted, shoulders dropping in defeat and head tilting in genuine confusion. "How can you just... how can you just let things go like that?"

"Living in the moment and not letting past grievences slow me down." Sonic flashed him a toothy grin with fingerguns to acompany it. "Besides, It was what I bargained for wasn't it?"

"You knew I was gonna bite and you just went with it?!"

"Don't worry about it, I'm used to having fox teeth in my arms." Seems that the most reliable strategy Sonic had was to just keep chuckling and treat everything as if it wasn't a big deal to make an attempt at deescalating Nine's reaction.

An incredibly poor attempt, because each word that left his mouth only confused and irritated the fox further.

Exept this time what stumped Nine for good was the implication of his last answer, it took a second to click.

"Oh." And then it fully sank in. "Seriously?"

"Yep, a little biter he was. And a scratcher too." Sonic went to his muzzle, parting his peachy fur to reveal a barely visible set of scars in the warm lamplight.

Nine sat there in silence, still holding the first aid kit in his lap as if Sonic were to snatch it from him any second. He just needed something to keep him grounded and stop his hands from shaking, thats all.

Then his eyes fell on the bandage around the hedgehog's arm once again, dragging his whole expression down along.

"I'm sorry." Nine practically whispered. He should've apologized a long time ago, he really should've, but amidst his adrenaline-fueled panic and then the frustration, it didn't even cross his mind.

"Didn't quite catch that."

Now Nine didn't know if the other was deliberately playing dumb, because it didn't sound like he was daring or teasing him to humiliate himself out loud, there was way too much sincerity in that question. Whatever, it didn't matter. The least he could do was to bite the bullet he deserved anyway.

"I said, I'm sorry. For this whole thing." It still felt weird saying those words out loud. Embarrassing even. It was hard getting them out.

"For...that." he added with a shaky voice, pointing at Sonic's arm.

Yet Sonic only smiled. He always just smiled.

"Haha, seriously, don't sweat it! Aside from being used to it, It doesn't even hurt anymore, I heal pretty fast." The sincerity with which the hedgehog basically glowed made the corners of Nine's eyes sting.

He did not deserve to be treated so kindly.

"As I said, we're friends." Sonic scooted as close to him as possible while one of his legs still dangled over the edge of the bed.

He kept trying to change the subject, it was obvious, but Nine just couldn't let it go so easily.

"What does it change about the fact that you were bleeding because of me."

"C'mon bud I'm sure you know you've done worse than that."

...That hurt like a rusted nail through his throat.

But, well, it was true.

Nine felt his ears pin to his skull but made no effort to fight the instinct of shrinking on himself.

"Point is! A lot of things changed actually! You no longer have to rely just on yourself for everything."

Sonic was so, so desperate to brush this whole thing under a rug it was actually hilarious. But hey, it was good to know what he really thought of it. Of him. It's what he asked for after all...

While he was too busy blinking rapidly to try and keep his tears at bay, Sonic was attempting to pry his hands from the box. And despite Nine gripping it so hard it left barely noticeable dents in its soft metal, he succeeded.

Nine wasn't sure what the hedgehog wanted to do next and he expected anything but for him to hold his shaking hands in his. Well, more accurately, let Nine hold onto his fingers while Sonic ran his thumbs across his knuckles in a soothing back and forth motion.

"You know that if you actually succeeded at attacking Knux it would just snowball into more problems, right?"

Tch, even if violence wasn't always the answer, it sure as hell was when someone called him a freak.

"That, plus I just couldn't let him hurt you again."

The gentleness in Sonic's voice and hands burned through Nine's chest. It completely blurred his vision and made it hard to breathe properly.

"I just. I don't want to be a burden."

And even if he only saw undefined blobs of blue and beige through his peripheral vision before he just opted to shut his eyes for good, he definitely heard the way Sonic's whole demeanor completely sunk.

"You two are so painfully alike, y'know..." He let out a sad chuckle while giving Nine's hands a soft squeeze.

And then he went to prepare and say something to counter, but Nine shot first;

"You've done more than enough for me I- the least I c-can do is not bother you with my problems."

And he hated the way his voice threatened to completely break with sobs. He didn't deserve to be the one crying, there was nothing for him to even cry about.

"Pretty sure we live in the same house now- or universe, so you can't find a loophole you smart-ass." Sonic chuckled and blew a quick shot of air at the fox to get him to open his eyes again. "So, your problems are also my problems."

Aside from Nine's eyes now being further irritated and teary, he didn't even realize that he was subconsciously pulling away until Sonic dragged him back. And then the other leaned in as close as his vision allowed him to easily focus on the fox before him.

"Whether you like it or not."

The smile he gave afterwards had a layer of threatening positivity to it, the choice of being all alone was completely out of the window after this conversation it seemed.

Nine wasn't sure whether he was comforted by that or not.

"I'm not, I'm not used to that. Y'know, people helping me, or, or caring about me.." He cringed at himself for saying that out loud. A part of him really wanted to run away and hide, to never be found, while the other craved nothing more than to just sit here, and let Sonic hold onto him without a care in the world.

"Heh, I can tell. How good that we got plethora of time to change that." And the hedgehog shot him the softer version of his iconic grin as he clasped Nine's hands between his.

"You're really gonna waste your time on me with that?" If anything, Nine would concider it hopeless, just being around people irritated him to no end. How on Chaos' green planet was he supoused to get used to them poking their noses in his buiseness and trust them to not use his weaknesses against him.

"Hm, you betcha! That's what friends are for."

It just began sinking into place for Nine when suddenly Sonic's forehead gently hit his.

"And no time spent with you is a waste bud."

All of the tears being held at bay no longer had any restraint placed on them.

#sonic prime #tags are slight spoilers in case anyone wants to figure out what the hell migt've happened before this scene took place for themselves!!! #Ok so in case none of you live in my head and I didn't manage to make it come clear in my writing #what happened was that Nine got into a little bit of an argument with the resistance over petty past stuff #Knux said something he shouldn't #but to everyone's luck Sonic was part of the conversation too so he stopped a pretty pissed off Nine from mauling an echidna #and instead took one for the team by getting bitten pretty badly in his arm #Nine is being wracked by the guilt of his actions 😔💔 #big fan of the affectionate headbutt btw #glad I've been reintroduced to it in my olden years #this the thing I was talking about having finished writing before Wednesday #may there be wholesome but Tails only bring mentioned in the subtext lmao #miles nine prower #nine the fox #sonic the hedgehog #wholesome sonic and nine? wednesday #wsatw #me when I finish writing

[whinlatter]

something tells me you don't really like tonks, just a hunch xD

For the relationship ask if you're still doing it: harry and remus, molly and remus, teddy and adromeda. I would love to see what do you think <3

noooo i love tonks! i had a ball writing her and think that @evesaintyves’ rendering of her is one of fandom’s greatest gifts 😭 i just find it very funny that harry thinks she should low key get a grip. and as a clumsy young woman who should myself get a grip, i say: get off her case, hjp.

ok the remus + tonks/black extended family universe... hyped for this one. delicious choices, thank you anon. (i have a few more in the inbox i'm going to take a stab at but am trying to avoid spoilery ones or ones where i risk boring you all again by repeating old talking points, so if i don't get to one pls forgive me...)

right — to business. we begin with everybody looking at remus lupin waiting for him to put his crippling self loathing aside to write (1) singular letter to his dead friend's son:

i jest (to an extent). but i do think the entirety of harry and remus' dynamic is best encapsulated in one singular scene in PoA:

“When they get near me — ” Harry stared at Lupin’s desk, his throat tight. “I can hear Voldemort murdering my mum.” Lupin made a sudden motion with his arm as though to grip Harry’s shoulder, but thought better of it.

i know there's a very understandable move in AUs to imagine what would have happened if remus had raised harry - or, more often, if remus had been 'allowed' to raise harry by dumbledore. but looking past the whole plot-requiring-harry-to-be-at-the-dursleys thing, the truth is, canon remus lupin would never have put himself forward to raise harry, because of his own (not unfounded!) concerns about the precarity of his existence and the dangerousness of his condition. remus' sense of self - more specifically his fear of himself, and his very low self worth - consistently lead him to hold harry at arm's length from the moment he's introduced in the series until its bitter end. i don't think remus at all approves of the way harry is treated at the dursleys. but i can very much imagine that remus thinks it would still be better than the life he could have given harry if he ever had been called upon to serve as his primary caregiver. one of the most interesting implicit dynamics in the series is that harry notices this and does, to some extent, resent it (obviously the fact that he only ever calls him 'lupin' in his narration, though uses remus to his face, and also: 'Harry had received no mail since the start of term; his only regular correspondent was now dead and although he had hoped that Lupin might write occasionally, he had so far been disappointed.') while the harry & remus fight in DH is about harry's view of what remus ought to do re tonks and the baby, it’s also harry coming as close as saying to remus: you're letting your own child down like you let me down. ('I’m pretty sure my father would have wanted to know why you aren’t sticking with your own kid, actually... He had it coming to him,” said Harry. Broken images were racing each other through his mind: Sirius falling through the veil; Dumbledore suspended, broken, in midair; a flash of green light and his mother’s voice, begging for mercy… ‘Parents,’ said Harry, 'shouldn’t leave their kids unless—unless they’ve got to.')

molly and remus: i think this is a very, very underrated relationship! i know there’s a lot of molly-bashing around these days, especially if you’re a marauders and/or sirius and/or wolfstar stan. but i think it is very very overlooked that the person who looks after adult remus the most from 1995 onwards, and who shows him some of the deepest trust and roots for his happiness, is molly. for a man who has plainly known a huge amount of financial/food/housing insecurity, and who is so villainised in wider wizarding society, it is no small gesture for molly to not only provide for remus materially but also to trust him in a house with all of her children and encourage him in a romantic relationship he struggles to feel entitled to and worthy of. (i love sirius, but he is in no fit state to ‘look after’ remus in the last year of his life, and fandom’s continued unwillingness to recognise the importance of domestic/caregiving labour as a vital contribution to the resistance will never not be problematic af). remus clearly values and admires molly in return - the only time he actually ever entertains a parent/guardianship role is when molly is weeping over her boggart, crying onto remus’ shoulder (‘what must you think of me?’) and he assures her that if anything were to happen to her and arthur, he would be a part of the team making sure her children are taken date of (‘what do you think we’d do, let them starve?’) remus’ relationship with molly is often the more mild-mannered translator of her viewpoint to others (especially others with hot tempers), and mediator trying to find middle ground between molly’s protective instincts and the battle/ready instincts of others. (more grist to my sirius & ginny parallels mill — in DH, when a fuming ginny is desperately trying to sneak off to fight in the battle, it’s remus who appeals to molly and ginny to find the compromise of ginny staying in the room of requirement to know what’s going on but not actively fight, a mirror image of his role mediating the dispute between sirius and molly over harry’s right to know what’s going on at grimmauld in ootp…) molly accepts this compromise, a sign that she trusts remus implicitly (she never frets that a werewolf is living among her children in ootp onwards, and invites him to christmas readily even after months undercover with the pack) and also feels able to call him out (‘i’ve always said you’re taking a ridiculous line on this, remus’.) this is too long but basically — justice for molly and remus, unlikely buds!

teddy and andromeda: i weirdly think a lot about teddy lupin these days. i tend to imagine teddy as a very mild-mannered, affable, calm child, like who remus might have been had he not been bitten, with tonks' heart and sociability but also with something of remus' more philosophical disposition. i think he'd slip very naturally into a big brother role because, in part, he does see himself as having a responsibility to take care of people, and i think this would shine through in his relationship with andromeda. we know teddy was raised by his gran, and i imagine she feels enormously protective of him, perhaps bordering on strict in her desire to keep him safe from the harm that came to all the rest of her family. but i like to imagine teddy didn't act out against this too much, in part because he understands where it comes from and in turn feels very protective of andromeda. growing up in the aftermath of the war would make teddy as a child particularly aware of the grief and pain and the silences among the adults around him, and i think teddy would take any compensatory protective strictness on andromeda's part with good grace, and humour her for it. i like to think teenage/young adult teddy serves as the translator for any of his gran's more prickly edges, and that they have a very close relationship that both of them really treasure.

#meta #wow really got the soapbox out for this one #and depressed myself in the process #me screaming into the void forever that remus is canonically crap and that's why he's so interesting #remus lupin #andromeda tonks #teddy lupin #molly weasley

[marchiekana]

Human heater anon here, I'll just call myself Anon H,I know you're not back from your camping which I really hope you're enjoying, camping is amazing if done right. Kinda makes me wanna do it. Anyways ! I'll leave this idea here, take it or leave it ! I just need to get this out to someone.

Ahem, I had the sudden thought of a reader who's just the most chill, laid back and nonchalant person. Someone is being annoying ? Reader doesn't care and and just keeps going. Alone ? Just Vibing. Someone disagrees with them intensely ? It's cool mate. Though it sometimes attracts people to diminish the reader because they know the reader won't care so they lash out their pent up frustration. They also annoy the characters (I'll mention them after), as in they're just TOO laid back it can be a pain. I think Silver Wolf, Serval and Kafka could be neat for that. Thanks for reading my little rant.

I'm back ehehe

But anyways this prompt made me kick my legs and giggle 🤭

Also there might be some grammer or spelling mistakes cause I typed this in like half an hour

I feel like kafka would share a similar energy too but hers is more... calculated? She'd definitely try to mess with you and make bets with the other members to see who makes you angry first(which she miserably failed at ).

Oh but she loves how you are sometimes( she loves u all the time). Your laid back attitude when someone is angry with you and seeing your nonchalant answers anger the person in front of you is free entertainment for her and the best thing is the snarky comments you give each other when you're having an argument. She'd purposefully try making you angry (which she'd, again, fail to do so)

But! Sometimes, just sometimes, she doesn't really like how you don't take things very serious. Especially when you've come back hurt from a mission or fighting with someone. or if you just fell down on the stairs. She hates how you don't take your injuries seriously and that annoys her a lot. Would subtly scold you in a soft tone but even after you shrug it off and tell her that you're fine or remark on how funny it was that this happened to you, she would raise her voice and tell you how she feels about what you're doing. But no worries after a little fight she'd apologize and tell you to take care of yourself and makes sure you do so.

But if someone really tried to hurt you both physically or with their words, that person better pray for themselves.

Now for Silver Wolf, she'd.....do nothing. She doesn't care much honestly. She likes how calm and friendly you are. Loves how you don't disturb her during her gaming sessions and will be ready to teach you any game you want. And the thing is, you're the only one who doesn't make her angry while she's teaching you cause you're pretty fast learner. Unlike a certain few.

And the way you fight is quite amusing too her. You're both very similar in that. A smug, expression and taunting words. Would definitely enjoy seeing you fight while she's on the sidelines.

Serval is an absolute tease about it. No intentions of making you angry, she just thinks it's cute.

But if, by any chance you get hurt while fighting or you happened to break one of her precious games, you better get ready cause you're in for a little ride around tantrum town. She doesn't like that you just say that you'll buy her a new one or tell her that she's overreacting with that stupid smug smile of yours. Its like You're not really sorry when you really are. Your expressions just don't match Your feeling and that causes a misunderstanding and then you're gonna get silent treatment for about three days and few death glares here and there. And maybe a few petty fights....but that's ok cause she'll forgive you in the end and tell you to atleast care about her feelings.

She absolutely loves your nonchalant smile/smug! You just look so good! She likes how cool headed you are and how well you handle situations, it could be an angry customer at her shop or anyone to say the least. Its not like she can't handle the customer herself, she wants to watch you do it, with that pretty little smug on your.

But just imagine, one day you broke her favourite trinkets given to her by her brother and she was already having a bad and then sees the condition of the trinket and an awkward smile on your face as you apologize to her. On that day, you saw a Serval that was a whole different person. She scolded you, you got angry and again, with that smug, taunting smile of yours, say something to piss her off more and she leaves. You better go ask her sorry after this and buy her some flower.

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Idk buf Kafka seems a bit too ooc in the end, honestly all of them do but oh well. thanks for listening to my rant too lol 😆

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© marchiekana do not repost, copy, translate or plagiarize my work!

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#honkai imagines #honkai star rail #kafka hsr #kafka honkai star rail #serval hsr #serval x you #serval x reader #serval honkai star rail #kafka x reader #kafka x you #hsr kafka #silver wolf #silver wolf honkai star rail #silver wolf hsr

[positivelyholland]

You're Not Sorry II

PLEASE GO READ PART 1 FIRST

pairing: harry styles x daughter!reader

genre: hurt/comfort

warnings: fight with a parent, tell me if i missed anything else

summary: after a week of tension between you and your dad, Harry ultimately comes to his senses 7 days after saying the terrible words he did

A/N OMG ITS FINALLY HERE!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

1 week. 7 days. 168 hours. You haven't talked to your dad since his last blow up a week ago. And the thing is, he hasn't talked to you either. You figured his lack of apology proves he meant all the terrible things he said to you that day. 

It hurt like hell at first, you'll admit that. But eventually, you realized through the help of your amazing mother and friends that made you realize he's just not worth your time. If he's gonna act like that and still call himself your dad then might as well not let it bother you. 

Harry on the other hand, has been the complete opposite of content the past week. He was really stressed when he said those awful words to you, although he's aware that there's no good enough excuse for what he said.

 All he wants is to apologize and beg for your forgiveness to be able to give his daughter a hug. Although he figured you wouldn't want to talk to him so he didn't push your boundaries. However, while his words weren't necessarily affecting you too much at the moment, all you wanted was a hug from your dad. 

At the end of the day, all these problems would be solved by the word “sorry” coming out of Harry’s mouth, and you both knew that. 

So here we are, a week later. After a week of no contact between the father-daughter pair, Harry decided it was time to face you along with dealing with his mistakes. 

Taking a deep breath, Harry walks up the stairs to your room where you were currently blasting music from. He hesitantly knocks on your door, resulting in you pausing your music and letting out a loud groan before stomping over to your door. 

When you opened the door and were met face to face with your dad (aka the last person you were expecting to be knocking on your door), your facial expressions exposed how much surprise you were experiencing. 

Harry's heart broke at the shock in your face. Did you really not expect him to ever apologize? And your honest answer to that question was no. You were convinced he wasn't ever going to come to his senses and realize how terrible he was to you that day. 

But here he is. Awkwardly standing at your door, looking miserable due to how much he had been beating himself up lately. 

“Can I come in? I have some things I need to say” 

Harry’s voice was small and shy, you almost didn't hear it. You nodded your head in response and opened your door wider for him, before going over to sit on your bed. You patted the spot next to you, signaling for him to sit by you. 

Harry cautiously moves into your room and slowly sits to the spot next to you on your bed. The room is dead silent for a few long, excruciating minutes before he eventually speaks up. 

“I’m gonna start by saying I love you so much, don't you ever forget that. I know I haven't been very good at showing it lately but my love for my daughter is unconditional and will never change. I’ve been terrible to you lately and I hope we can move past this one day, but I understand if you never ever forgive me because I wouldn't forgive myself but-”

“Dad!! It's ok. I forgive you and I love you too” You interrupted his rambling because if you didn't it probably wouldn't have stopped for hours. 

“Wait really? Just like that?” Harry's face was a mix of surprise and so much love and appreciation for his incredible daughter.

“Of course, you're my dad. I love you too and everyone makes mistakes” you answered like it was no big deal. 

Harry made no response other than taking you into his arms and embracing you like he never has before. Hugging your dad was such an important thing to you, and being in his arms was something you wouldn't trade for the world. All your worries were washed away the second you felt his fatherly touch. 

“I love you dad”

“I love you so much y/n. Don't you ever forget that”

#harry styles x daughter!reader #harry styles x reader #taylor swift x daughter!reader #taylor swift x reader #styles swift!reader #dad!harry styles #x daughter!reader

[ray4youknow]

Can you probs do a stan x kyle x sick gn reader whose so fukkin stubborn it drives kyle crazy so he eventually calls stan to take care of them? 😭 if not its ok ill take pete or damien 😻

sure

STAN X KYLE X SICK GN! READER

(This might be bad so please forgive me cuz I really never wrote an oneshot before)

Today I wanted to go out with my friends Kyle, Kenny, Stan and Cartman... but there was a problem... I'm sick and I promised to go to Starks Pond. I'm just laying in bed and I'm bored until...

"I'm going there! Even if I'm sick!" I stood up and immediately felt dizzy, I ignored it and packed my things and went out to Stark Ponds where I saw my friends

Kyle and Kenny waved to me, Stan and Cartman weren't there yet.

"hi y/n" kyle said and smiled at me.

“hi kyle and hi kenny” I said

"Stan and Cartman are coming, fatass really wanted to get KFC," Kenny mumbled.

I laughed a little and immediately felt dizzy again, which Kyle noticed.

"uhmm y/n? could it be that you're sick?"

"huh? what?" I asked him.

"are you sick?" he asked me again.

"No, I never get sick, Kyle" I answered him and coughed.

Kenny and Kyle just gave me worried looks..

“Dude, you should go home and rest,” said Kenny.

"No, I'm not going, I came here to have fun with you guys!"

“y/n it gets worse when you’re like this out here in the cold!” Kyle said.

"I stay here!"

Kyle sighed 

"Good, you wanted it that way... Kenny tell Stan and Cartman that me and Y/N can't come with you guys"

 Kyle said to Kenny and grabbed my arm.

"NO! let go!" 

I tried to free myself from him but his grip was too strong. He didn't say anything and dragged me to my house

he took me to my room.

“lie down y/n” he said.

"I don't want to!" I said stubbornly.

Kyle just looked annoyed at my stubbornness.

“listen y/n if you don’t rest you can’t get better!” he said and threw me (gently) onto the bed.

"Wait a minute" he said and went out of the room..... when he came back after a few minutes he had a spoon full of medicine. "What is that?" I asked Kyle.

"Medicine, and don't argue back!"

"I dont want it "

He just sighed angrily and took out his phone

Kyle tapped his phone and called Stan.

"hey dude, where are you?" Kyle asked.

"I'm at Starks Pond with Kenny and Cartman right now... I heard you two aren't coming. What's wrong?" he asked with concern in his voice.

I sighed.. well Stan... Y/n is sick and refuses to do anything... she/he doesn't want to rest or take her medicine...

“Should I come to you?” Stan asked.

“that’s why I called you... I’m sure you’ll convince y/n.

After half an hour the doorbell rang.

"who is this?" I asked Kyle.

"It's just Stan don't worry."

"Hi guys" Stan said and looked at me worried

"Thank god Stan, she drives me crazy" Kyle said..

"HEY!" I pouted, offended. Stan had to giggle.

“You two are like an old married couple,” Stan joked.

Me and Kyle looked at him like he was an alien or something and blushed a little

"whatever" stan got serious.

“take your medicine y/n”

"How many more times do I want to-"

“y/n!” Stan said sternly...

Come on, why are you all so stupid today?

"Fine..." I sighed... "but it doesn't taste good."

Kyle rolled his eyes "the taste didn't kill anyone"

"You two are so mean!"

“y/n you said you were taking the medicine” stan sighed.

"I've decided, I don't want to-.." I was interrupted by Kyle kissing me (on the cheek (I can change it if you want)) "Shut up and just take it!" he said, blushing. "o-okay" I blushed. Stan just grinned at us. "You two are cute when you blush" he said and kissed us both on the cheek.. "SHUT UP STAN!" we both screamed.

and yes... in the end I took my medication and went to sleep. But I'm not alone because Stan and Kyle watched me all night so nothing happened to me

(I think it’s okay? Sorry if it’s bad, like I said it is my first oneshot and I am also not good about feelings)

#art #fanart #love #cute #cool #south park #cartman #kenny #kyle #stan #fanfiction #fanfic writing #fanfics #south park fanfiction #x reader #female reader #south park x reader #gn reader #writing #writer #sp ray

[soleilnomoon]

Prompt: “I don’t like them; I can barely tolerate them.” for Abarai Renji. Once again, I leave it up to you what you wanna do (but maybe enemies to lovers) Yes, I might be on a little Bleach binge right now but it's okay you like it. kiss kiss

*hides face* ok, ok, ok, hear me out, let's pretend i didn't take *insert accurate length of time here* and say i wrote this in a few days. i am so sorry i took forever and ever with this but as u know i can only give u top quality work or else i'll never forgive myself. renji is.......well *motions to him* yk how that man is, he made me suffer!!!! in a good way!!! but still i suffered!!! yk how much i love enemies 2 lovers u big brained beauty 🤭 so ty baby❤️️ also this is my first renji fic and i can't belev it.

5.2k words (don't look at me, just don't), fem reader, nsfw, 18+ mdni, enemies 2 lovers, angst city, angst angst city biiiitch (yk the vibez babey), smut obviously, no fluff bc who do u think i am? feat. renji being a mean petty bitch (i guess that makes him a mean dom maybe yes), sub reader bc that's what i want; there's a party with alcohol, ichigo and co. make brief appearances, bathroom sex, choking (he's sf romantic), a lot of cursing bc they're grown that's why, renji is a beast when he's jealous, reader is a lil bit of a brat but lbr who wouldn't be in that situation; mutual ""unrequited"" pining, lots of tension, fingering, rough (consensual) sex, lil bit of degradation, lil bit of a size kink, lil bit of praise kink, idk there's probably more stuff but i'm so tired rn i can't think; um renji obviously comes w his own gd warning; reader is determined to not let this man win but, hello, it's renji he always comes out on top wink wink. (if u see spelling errors/mistakes no u didn't hottie)

“when i write about all of this it becomes its own kind of violence. / i retell the story as myth, as if it were my own body devoured.” — caitlin scarano & “so much of love is violence. the desire / to be split open, invaded, mangled / and made new.” — erin slaughter

HATRED X TASTES X SWEET

you’ve never been cut out for this line of work, but your insistence on eliminating all your shortcomings is commendable. brave, even. it’s something you don’t really think about unless you want to spend the night half-drunk, rambling about the things you should’ve done but never had the courage to do.

like telling a certain red-haired, bullheaded lieutenant that he’s the most ridiculous and excessively arrogant man you’ve ever come across. all in all, you’re pretty sure telling him off won’t phase him; nothing ever does, not really anyway.

at first you try politeness; your grandmother would be proud of how well you’ve learned to bite your tongue. it’s ungraceful, but you fake it well enough that others think your emotional maturity is far above theirs. little do they know, you actually have to literally bite your tongue; simply remaining silent isn’t easy for you anymore. so, when you bite, it’s with rage, months of unshed tears and accumulated spite; you bite your tongue so hard you bleed more every time.

your unsaid words bunch together — tiny soldiers determined to strike in unison without fail — and sit heavily in the back of your throat, ready to launch forward at your command.

but you never say them, and you choke more than once; an unbearable shame to carry with you as he continues to slash at your patience, thin ribbons cascading off you like confetti. you wonder if your anger will lead to your death— or if it’ll lead to his. you intend to keep all of that hidden, though, and keep reminding yourself that eventually he will tire from berating you, from talking to you as if you’re the most incompetent being in all of soul society, from looking at you like your very being disgusts him.

that’s what you tell yourself these days. you like to conveniently ignore the way his dark eyes linger on yours during meetings — you’ve noticed that people have taken to describing them as soulless, cold and critical, unimpressed at everything and anyone.

but you see him — all of him; the raw, feral, powerful and severe side that not many have the misfortune of knowing. they think they get the real version of renji whenever they deal with him, but they never do; you know that now. you doubt it’s even intentional on his part, or maybe — just maybe — he really does hate you.

to put it plainly, as you’ve told rukia and rangiku, the sixth division lieutenant has the biggest fucking chip on his shoulder. despite the walls he continues to put up to keep others from carving out a place for themselves in his life, despite the way his words roll around his mouth, clumsily coasting down the length of his tongue before they pierce the air around you with their toxicity — you’re tired of the way he purposely singles you out time and time again to point out your inadequacies without remorse.

abarai renji is also sick of dealing with you. whenever he thinks he’s found a means of scaring you off, you scurry right back more determined and more obnoxious than ever. which is rich, coming from him.

he claims you’re inconsequential, a nuisance — a pest, even — one that he intends to get rid of permanently. it’s harsh and he’s more than aware of that, but he finds that this is the most appropriate solution to his problem. he could easily ignore you; he could try to keep his comments to himself and try to be somewhat cordial whenever you cross paths. but he won’t. and he has no damn idea why.

“no, no come in, i have plenty of snacks for everyone.”

rukia’s voice is a constant in his life that he’ll always be thankful for. he watches her glide into the room, grinning at the friends she’s invited over, her laughter like soft bells that is easily recognizable even with all the conversation happening. when he feels his chest constrict, an uncomfortable, yet familiar warmth stretching over his skin, he decides to drink so that he can ignore the sensation and forget.

a feeble attempt, because he knows how this will all end — with him drunk off his ass in an even worse mood than he started.

mouth opening, renji prepares to tell rukia to get better sake, when rangiku leads you into the living room where he’s lounging comfortably. the bottle in his hand grows heavier by the second and suddenly he’s not very interested in drinking anymore. already, his foul mood from earlier returns, and every step you take only fuels his irritation; it bubbles underneath his skin, making him frown and grip the bottle tighter.

you don’t need to look at him to know that he’s glaring at you — he always is. rangiku feigns obliviousness as she encourages you to go make yourself comfortable while she fetches snacks with rukia. you stare at both of them, wide-eyed, confused — a pleading look sliding onto your face after a few moments, but they assure you both that they’ll be back shortly.

with a sigh you sit on the armchair adjacent to him, determined to just remain quiet in the hopes that he’ll just ignore you for once. sitting up straight, discomfort finds its way to the pit of your stomach, swirling around as you fidget with the bracelet around your wrist. his eyes watch your movements with an obsessiveness that startles him; there’s no reason why he should be interested in the shape of your fingers, there’s no reason why he should be interested in the way you keep brushing stray curls away from your face, and there’s no reason why he should be interested in possibly fucking you when he knows for a fact that he is absolutely uninterested in you.

his disinterest runs so deep it spoils the taste of the sake, but he takes another swig anyway. the alcohol burns as it travels swiftly down his throat, and it just so happens that you glance over at him — innocuous, an attempt to gauge his annoyance level — as his throat bobs and your mouth dries at the sight.

you turn your face away quickly, a traitorous flush crawling slowly along your skin, unjustly warming your cheeks. inhaling deeply, you do your best to will the blush away to no avail. where the hell are rukia and rangiku? surely it can’t take that long to grab snacks. you’re tempted to go find them, but you have a sinking feeling that it would turn you into a coward.

and you refuse to give that man any more ammo against you.

IT’S X (NOT) X YOU

what initially starts as a small get-together, quickly turns into a party; leave it to rangiku to liven things up, her laughter infectious and whimsical, flitting about like a persistent hummingbird as she encourages everyone to play drinking games with her. experience taught him better than to engage because despite his high tolerance, there’s really no beating rangiku when she’s on a roll.

but when you emphatically agree to play with the rest, fury rises in his chest; your audacity, it seems, knows no bounds — and, yes, he understands the hypocrisy in his critique. he just doesn’t care.

the games are every bit as simple and ridiculous as you thought they’d be, but as everyone seems to be in relatively good spirits, you play along. not normally competitive with things like this, you get into the swing of things when you win round after round.

cheers resound nearby at your success, but throughout the evening, you feel renji’s stare and do everything in your power to not give in and look back at him. a tough feat to say the least, as you are always acutely aware of his presence; and when you do happen to sneak another glance, his legs are spread and you curse under your breath for finding that attractive.

foolish, you chide, so fucking foolish.

renji sucks his teeth as he feels a heaviness in his head; groaning loudly he swirls around what little sake he has left in his glass before finishing it.

“you lose again,” rukia’s voice is soft and teasing, but he’s annoyed and can’t be bothered with talking to her right now. she pats his shoulder gingerly before standing up to head to the kitchen. his mind is a mess and he blames you for it completely.

“i don’t fucking care,” he says gruffly to her retreating figure, not bothering to elevate his voice as he’s sure she heard him. and he really doesn’t care; he’s trying to tell himself to calm down, but he can’t.

the fault completely lies with you — of course it does, everything you do agitates every cell in his body. the reason is simple, and he hates that he doesn’t want to admit it — he’s so undeniably attracted to you that it pisses him off. he takes in your appearance for the twelfth time that night, admiring the softness of your cheeks, the fullness of your lips, the way you seem entirely too animated as you laugh at someone’s lame joke — and yes, he can tell it’s not funny from how your laughter dies down after a few seconds.

if he had better sense, he’d stop looking at you, but he can’t now; he might blame the sake for this later.

the intensity behind his gaze is enough to bring an inextinguishable heat along your skin. it’s only unpleasant because it travels down to your lower abdomen and brings about an agonizing ache between your thighs. at first, you do the sensible thing and ignore it; but the longer he stares, the more you want to look over, until finally you can’t take it anymore.

“i’ll be back,” you mumble to the other guests, although you doubt they hear you with how rowdy everyone is being; the noise isn’t unwelcomed, the distraction serves to mask your footsteps when you scurry from the living room to the back corridor, turning corner after corner until you find the bathroom.

a coward — that’s what you are.

you barricade yourself in there without thinking, heart pounding loud enough to disorient you. after several long minutes, you splash water on your face and take a few deep breaths.

“i can’t believe i ran away,” your voice is so soft you barely hear the words — almost as if you’re still in disbelief over the entire situation. there’s something off about renji tonight; the tension between you was more palatable and tangible than normal.

even though you feigned nonchalance as best as you could, there were so many moments where you couldn’t help but watch him too. pitiful. absolutely pitiful. there’s no excuse for it, and yet you struggle to find one anyway.

as you look at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, you try to convince yourself to head back out there. sooner or later, people will realize that you’ve gone missing — and rangiku is nosy enough and like a bloodhound when she’s drunk. your time is incredibly limited now.

there’s no reason for you to continue to avoid the inevitable, so you sigh and give yourself a small pep talk before heading back outside.

TRUTH X OR X …

renji’s mood doesn’t improve at all; in fact, it worsens the moment ichigo sits right next to him. he’s not even sure why this sets him off, but even closing his eyes and counting backwards does nothing to keep him calm.

with slight difficulty, renji grits out, “what do you want?”

undeterred, ichigo stares at renji pointedly, voice steady as he says, “you could go after her, you know.”

again, renji sucks his teeth loudly, arms folded against his chest, right leg bouncing slightly as he taps his foot on the floor. punching ichigo would be pointless, and then rukia would get involved and he doesn’t have time to deal with the fallout from that so he keeps his hands to himself.

besides, his anger is obviously misdirected right now. he knows — he knows —but he doesn’t care, so he doesn’t mince his words when he responds with, “go after who?” through his peripheral, he can see ichigo’s patience has also reached its limit.

“you’re not that stupid, so stop acting like it.”

normally, renji would take the opportunity to mes s around and argue back and forth, but he might actually fight his friend if he doesn’t walk away. so, he does; abrupt and without looking back, footsteps heavy on the hardwood floor.

maybe he just needs to change his approach with you, maybe talking things out would work in his favor; or maybe he needs to fuck you hard enough to purge you from his mind.

he lies to himself when he considers the first option, because it’s the second option that drives him to walk a little faster, head full of impossible thoughts as he wonders just how far you’d let him go.

when renji finally finds you, you’re in the middle of rebuffing the advances of an unfamiliar guest — they’re drunk, handsy, and keep oscillating between giving you cheesy pick-up lines and berating you for rejecting them. but you stand firm, and your voice is relatively loud when you tell them, “for the last fucking time, go away.”

under normal circumstances, renji would let you handle this yourself; he has no desire to play prince charming or be a knight in shining armor. you’re more than capable, and he’s seen the way you fight and argue to defend yourself — but, it’s when they place a wandering hand on your hip that he loses sight of all of that.

a brief moment passes, where your blood boils as you contemplate how best to kick their ass, but you never get the chance. a rather large shadow hovers over you both, but you already know who it is without having to look properly.

renji is a force to be reckoned with on a good day, but he’s at his fucking limit right now.

he doesn’t ask, doesn’t give any options for retreat, doesn’t say a word when he yanks them off with a brute strength that surprises even you.

now, can he really be blamed for throwing them into the neighboring wall hard enough to make a noticeable hole? and is it really his fault that the drunk can hardly walk as they clutch their broken arm while murmuring something unintelligible, something that renji takes as a sign of them wanting a repeat demonstration?

consequences be damned, he gives the drunk a lethal look before they scramble away in fear.

“loser,” he says loud enough for them to hear, but they don’t double back or even try to go toe-to-toe with the hot-headed lieutenant. you watch, half-amused and half-impressed with the unnecessary machismo, but still, you know better than to chastise him right now, especially when your heart sputters out of control from his proximity.

“…thanks,” you say, a faint flush on your cheeks, voice soft, head fuzzy when you realize that renji — aka mr. “i’ll fight you on everything any day of the week unprovoked for no reason other than to drive you crazy” — saved you. unprompted at that.

you make the mistake of looking up at him, your nerves prompting you to take a small step back when you realize that the usual hostility that renji reserves for you specifically is nowhere to be found. in its place is something more unreadable — or, rather, you don’t want to read into it for fear of being wrong.

renji steps closer, which makes you back up again until your back hits the wall and you’re no longer able to escape.

“we need to talk,” he says suddenly, but you shake your head, non-verbally objecting to the idea, curls bouncing wildly with your exaggerated movements. since he knows he’s pressed for time, he grabs your face with his large hand and stops you from moving. “that wasn’t a request.”

swallowing rusty nails would be better than dealing with your conflicting feelings over renji right now, because he’s much too close to you and now you’re forgetting why it is you hate him in the first place. ironically, he’s in the exact same position. so far, he’s acted on impulse over you more times than he can count tonight, but he supposes that’s to be expected — you are a wildcard, after all.

“what if i don’t want to.” your response is clumsy, the words tumbling one after the other. “what if i want you to leave?” you don’t actually mean that, but you throw it at him anyway, to see if maybe this was all a fluke, and maybe, just maybe he’ll remember himself and you both can go back to fighting like usual.

he considers your question, goes so far as to release your face to wrap his hand around your throat instead. your sharp inhale and parted lips tell him all he needs to know.

with a slightly raised brow, he asks, “well, do you?”

because if you do, he’ll walk away right now. but he knows what your answer will be, he just has to drag it out of you. he squeezes your neck to remind you to hurry it up, and before you can answer him properly, he places his leg in between yours, pressing close enough that you roll your hips forward while whimpering softly.

he really didn’t think any of this through, but luckily the adrenaline from it all won’t wear off anytime soon, so he’ll improvise along the way. he spent most of the night dealing with a semi-hard cock that wouldn’t listen to reason no matter how many times he tried to stop thinking about you. but now? all of that restraint goes out of the window, and before he can question it, he kisses you.

you’ve kissed plenty of people in your life — some good, most were mediocre and uninspiring — but renji actually takes your breath away. everything about him commands all your attention; from the way his lips move against yours greedily, leaving behind burning kisses that make your nipples harden underneath your clothes — to the way he thrusts his tongue in between your plush lips, licking inside of your mouth hotly, igniting an inextinguishable flame deep inside of you.

he grabs your hip with his free hand, squeezing hard, fingers digging firmly. all the irritation from earlier dissipates completely, leaving you feeling lightheaded and needy; you grind against him recklessly, arousal dampening the front of your panties, clit sensitive as it rubs against the delicate fabric. his cock presses against you — thick, long, and hard — and you wonder if this is why he’s so angry with you all the time.

was it always that simple?

if you asked the question aloud, he wouldn’t know what to tell you — it’s a combination of things, but mostly he’s an idiot; he knows that now, but likewise you’re an idiot too. you just don’t realize it yet.

it’s renji who pulls away first, lightly panting, breath warm against your lips as he releases his hold on your neck. he doesn’t know where he finds the strength to string together a coherent statement, but his voice is low and husky when he speaks. “answer my question.”

you blink at him, completely in a daze, lips slightly swollen from all the kissing. “wh-what?” you don’t remember what he asked you, and you don’t care.

“do you want me to leave?”

for some reason, you completely forgot that you told him that. you rub your lips together and run your hands along his chest. “no.” the answer comes out automatically, without hesitation, and that’s all the encouragement he needs.

“good.”

SAY X IT X LOUDER

he picks you up with ease, almost as if you weigh nothing; a small squeal spills out of you as you wrap your legs around his waist, and renji gives you a sly smile — one laced with mischief and an unspoken promise of what’s to come.

you’re back in the bathroom again, this time sitting on the counter with renji standing in between your legs. his hands coast along your curvy hips and down your thighs. he’s touching you but he’s not touching you and it’s driving you crazy.

with hurried, eager hands you both undress, and for the umpteenth time you internally curse this style of uniform; still, it doesn’t take too long before his hands are on you again, calloused palms rough and warm against your skin. he places a kiss on your jaw, then another on your neck right underneath your earlobe; each kiss he leaves behind distorts your common sense, makes you feel irrational and impatient. your hands are soft and well-practiced, stroking his stiff cock as his hips jerk forward from your touch.

he can’t remember the last time someone had him this worked up, which pisses him off a little; because that means him fucking you once won’t settle things. at that thought, renji bites your neck and your startled yelp quickly morphs into a moan when he runs his tongue along the mark. he dips his hand in between your thighs, rubbing his thick fingers against your slit. a loud banging on the door has you looking over, and you can’t remember if he bothered to lock it once you both were inside.

your attention nearly falters, but when he pinches your clit you buck your hips, a shiver shooting down your spine at the slight pain.

“eyes on me,” is all he says, seemingly annoyed that you would dare to focus your attention elsewhere, “always keep them on me.” what he means by that, he doesn’t know, but you take the command at face value and nod while swallowing. he slides a finger inside of your wet pussy, and while you initially wanted to keep quiet to avoid suspicion and to prevent anyone from intruding, but you can’t now.

“renji,” you breathe, fingers trembling as you hold onto the counter for support, he thrusts his finger in and out, quick and hard, before inserting another. you clench around him, hips rocking forward as he fingerfucks you and grinds his palm against your clit. you close your eyes and moan louder than you mean to, chest heaving, thoughts jumbled and incoherent. he scissors his fingers inside of you, but quickly removes them without prompting.

“fuck!” you open your eyes again and stare at him in disbelief. “why did you stop?”

he laughs darkly and grabs your face roughly, fingers pressing into your soft skin without remorse. “what did i tell you earlier?” everything about this situation is laughable. he gave you very specific instructions, ones he thought were easy enough for you to follow. for some reason your movements are sluggish, mind in a haze as you scramble to remember but nothing comes to mind.

as you open and close your mouth, looking every bit as adorable as you are alluring, he decides to show you a bit of kindness.

“get down.” his command comes swift, his patience practically nonexistent; precum glides down the head of his thick cock, but he ignores it for the sake of teaching you a lesson. you don’t bother waiting for him to repeat himself and slide off the counter. “turn around.”

like a doll, your movements are dictated by renji with simple, short statements. nothing about that phases you, though; it’s all very exciting, so when you do turn to face the counter, you bend forward and lean over the counter. renji admires the roundness of your ass and slaps it hard.

again, you find yourself moaning loudly, without shame and not caring about the volume of your voice. surely the others won’t pay attention, as they’re still very drunk and are entertaining themselves with more games. another slap on your ass has you grabbing onto the counter again, legs shaking, arousal dripping between your thighs in anticipation. if renji doesn’t fuck you soon, you might actually die.

he knows he’s taking too damn long, but it’s much more interesting making you work for him. he rubs the tip of his cock against your puffy pussy, gliding it in between your slick folds, your moans sweetly wrapping around him once he pushes inside of you slowly. someone bangs on the door again, making you look over, anxiety quickly filling your head with unnecessary what ifs that almost command your full attention.

with narrowed eyes, renji grabs onto your hair, curls soft in his hand, and yanks hard.

“the fuck did i say earlier?”

goosebumps travel down your arms as a different kind of awareness and clarity surges through you quickly. you blink at your reflection, watching the way he towers over you, his muscles hard and defined — sculpted from years of training and dedication to honing his skills. it hits you then, what he’s really asking you.

“to,” you swallow thickly, throat dry, “to keep my eyes on you always.” you say it all in one breath, gasping when he runs his tongue along the curve of your ear. you don’t know how much more you can take, but you know if you complain, if you say anything he might stop altogether.

renji’s smile is wicked and dark, his lips graze your earlobe, voice deep and gravelly, a huskiness that wasn’t there before as he thrusts into you, burying his cock deeply.

“good girl.”

he refrains from kissing you properly, instead pushing you down so you can lean over the counter again. your mind melts from it all, and you’re panting, heart beating faster and faster as he firmly places a hand on your back.

“you’re squeezing me so tight,” he remarks thoughtfully, although you note the slight strain in his voice; as much as he tries to act like he’s not that affected by you, you know that isn’t the case at all. your pussy is every bit as enticing and heavenly as he knew it would be; he pulls back and slams his cock into you all over again, filling you completely. you try to keep watching him in the mirror, but he’s fucking you like he’s angry with himself for being so attracted to you.

and he absolutely is. it’s a truth he fought against for so long that he’s given up on denying it now. your moans drip onto his skin like caramel, sticky and sweet, and when you say his name like that — your voice going higher and higher from the ferocity of his thrusts — he nearly loses his mind.

“fuck,” he says out loud, grabbing your hip roughly, your wetness coating the length of his cock, “you’re taking me so well.” he knows you can’t really answer him, and he likes that; you’re beyond caring at this point, instead focusing on the way his cock reaches a spot that has you bouncing your ass and fucking yourself against him. normally, renji would play around and edge you in retaliation, but he’s too far gone, completely under the spell of your pretty pussy, with how soft and tight it is.

you’re not sure how you got here, but you’re drowning in ecstasy right now. he instructs you to lift your leg to rest it onto the counter, pulling out momentarily to help you position and spread your legs further apart. he plunges his cock into you again, keeping his hips closer as he gives you shorter, frenzied thrusts. your head spins and you can’t think straight, but that doesn’t matter. all you care about is the way renji is angling his hips, rolling them forward to pound into your cunt roughly, balls heavy as they smack against your ass.

“oh, oh, oh.” you swear your life flashes before your eyes, because something possesses him, his strokes shorter, brutal, and frenetic. drool slides down your chin, your voice hoarse from how loud you’ve been. you’re sure someone’s heard you by now, but you don’t care.

how can you?

with renji fucking you like this — merciless and possessive, fingers brusing your skin, almost as if he wants to make sure you’ll be as obsessed with him as he is with you — your common decency, your morals, everything that makes you you, they don’t exist.

all that’s left is this burning desire to let him have his way with you for as long as he wants. thankfully, you have enough sense to not admit that out loud; who knows what kind smugness you’ll be subjected to if renji knew.

but you’re pretty damn transparent about it, he can tell from the way you can’t stop clenching your pussy around his cock, from how your pussy makes loud, lewd squelching noises — ones that he’ll commit to memory so he can revisit them from time to time.

tears roll down your cheeks and you sob as you hold onto the counter as best as you can, back arching, hips rocking against him with a neediness you never knew you had. there’s a tightening in your stomach and your pulse skyrocketing as a flash of white practically blinds you. he watches the way your pussy keeps swallowing the length of his cock, and you finally fall over the edge, orgasm suffocating you with its intensity.

your cunt flutters around him, gummy walls soft and hypnotic, an addiction he never thought he’d have; breathing heavily, his muscles tense and renji groans something that suspiciously sounds like your name. the thought alone makes your face burn and warms your chest in a way that doesn’t make sense. and when he finally cums, he humps into you, cum thick and hot as it spills inside your pussy, mixing with your slick wetness. a completely messy affair, but he doesn’t care — it’s not his bathroom, after all.

legs trembling, you’re limp and incapable of movement, whimpering and whining until he finally pulls out of you.

renji runs a hand down his face, feeling spent but more than satisfied. suddenly his shoulders aren’t so tight and tense, and his mood is much more tolerable. you do your best to stand but almost fall — your legs are useless, turned to jelly because of the man behind you. he chuckles at that, then clears his throat once he realizes. he fully expected there to be a moment of awkwardness after, but it never comes. when he sees your face — lips bruised and swollen, face flushed, eyes glazed with a faraway look — he feels compelled to kiss you again. so, he does. it’s not sweet, nor is it tender, but it still makes your heart swell all the same. he holds you close as you wrap your arms around his neck, doing your best to keep standing, even though your legs are ready to give out.

you don’t know exactly what any of this means, but you do understand him a bit better now. he’s terrible with expressing himself, but you kind of like that about him; and maybe this isn’t the healthiest relationship, but life was uncertain and you’d take renji fucking you like it’s his last day alive over him openly hating you any day.

#it is done!!!! finally!!! i survived sora #fic request #bleach angst #bleach smut #bleach x reader #bleach x y/n #abarai renji x reader #abarai renji x y/n #abarai renji angst #abarai renji smut #renji x reader #renji x y/n #renji smut #renji angst #‘i can change him’ 🥴 #pls no i can't be SERIOUS #y/n continues to be braver than any u.s. marine #y/n sippin that clown girl juice over this man and ykw? me too. #my man my man my man ✧ 𓂃𓄹՞ഒ #anyway ily sora i had fun writing this i hope u have fun aka suffer reading

[marvel-and-chicago-fan]

Wishing

Matilda Age: (15 years old)

Warnings: dont remember them since this is a old imagine

Summary: Jay wishes for something horrible now she ends up in the hospital

Never say, I wish

Me and Matilda were in a fight over her grades. She had gotten a C- after i told repeatedly to study instead she was on her phone talking with friends and watching Disney+. Things had gotten to the point where Will tried to interfere but I ended up snapping at him. 

“Do you ever listen to my instructions?” 

“I do, oh my gosh Jay you never give me a break. It's always Mattie  study, Matilda this Matilda that.” She argued 

“Because you don't listen whenever you need to. This always happens. You don't study, you don't do your homework.”

“That was one time Jay” She said with an attitude “and everytime you say" Mom wouldn't be happy with what you're doing”. I wish you would just stop bringing her up”

“I wish you were never in my life” I snapped

As soon as I said that, I immediately regretted it and wanted to take it back. Matilda just stood there looking like she was about to cry.

“Mattie i'm sorry” i said

She just ran up to her room and slammed the door shut. Will gave a death glare and I knew I was so screwed not only with will but because I knew he would tell Hailey and Hailey would give me the worst lecturer of my life.

“Man why the hell would you say that”Will yelled

“I don’t know it just slipped”

“It just SLIPPED?”He yelled “Are you insane did you not think about what you said before you said it”

“I'm sorry I didn't think, I'll go say sorry to her now.” I said walking 

“No, let her calm down first because what you said was so wrong”. 

And just like that i had put myself in the worst situation

***

Matties POV

Why would he say that? Does he actually mean that? Maybe he is right, mom wouldn't be proud of me. I'm just a burden to both of them.

Walking around I felt a familiar feeling. The feeling of fainting. “Ugh of course this has to happen now” I yell in my head. I go to sit down on my desk chair but I don't make it very far when I can already feel myself falling.

Everything hurts so much.

All I can see is black.

***

Wills POV

Im sitting scrolling on my phone glancing at jay everyone once and a while who looks antsy to go see Matilda. I look back down at my phone and I hear a loud thud. Hoping its matilda releasing her anger by throwing things i yell to make sure she's ok. “Mattie you good up there?”

I don't hear an answer from her and I yell aging. “Mattie!” Me and Jay both exchange a worried look before running up to her room and barging in.

“Matt why aren't you- Shoot Mattie can you hear me? '' Will said, slightly slapping Mattie's face. 

“Jay go get the car ready we can't wait for an ambulance” Will immediately checked to make sure she had a pulse and was relieved she did.

Jay nodded and ran out to the car so he could pull it out to the front.

I picked Matilda realizing how light she is. I ran out to the car and jay opened the door for us and we sped off to med

“This is 50-21 gorge. I'm headed to Chicago med. 15 year old female was found unconscious in her room.” I could hear jay radio in

***

“See Jay, this is why we don't say things like that. I had a co-worker in New York who wished that she didn't have a sister. the next day her sister died on the way to her house.” 

“I'm not gonna say anything until I see Matilda. I could never forgive myself if something happened to her and that was the last thing I ever said to her.” Jay said, i could hear his voice. He was on the verge of tears but Jay doesn't like to cry in front of people because he thinks it's embarrassing. 

Just then connor came and me and jay stood up hoping for good news 

“So she's stable and it was just another episode. She does have a concussion. I assume she fell on her head because she didnt get down fast enough. “

“Can we see her now?’ I asked already knowing the answer.

“Of course, good luck with her. She's delirious from the meds.’ He chuckled and left to continue his work. 

“Matilda, stop. How many times do I have to tell you to stop playing with your IV”. Making her jump because she didn't see us walk in. 

“Ok Jay, you can say whatever you want to say now.”

“I'm so sorry I said that Mattie, I never meant to say that. I just had a bad day and I shouldn't have taken it out on you. 

“I forgive you, and i'm sorry to i should start to listen to you guys more often” She admitted

I just let out a small laugh and we all broke out in laughter on how stupid the argument was.

“I love you guys” Mattie said

“We love you too Mattie” Jay replied

I hate this one but i just wanted to post something while im working on a new imagine, even though i could've picked from many of my imagines i never posted

#chi #chicago #chicago pd #one chicago #jay halstead #halstead brothers #h #will halstead #halstead sister #hospital mention tw #one chicago imagine #chicago med #fainting #arguing #argument

[astudyintheburningofhearts]

FINALLY FINISHED GOOD OMENS- IT WAS SO GOOD WTF- ALSO ALSO ALSO I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO SAY-

(spoilers under the cut) .

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.

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.

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Bildad the Shuhite, love of my life.

BRO THE METATRON- FUCK HIM, HONESTLY, WHAT A DICK- (chanelling my inner comic!Nick Nelson, can you tell?)

The FUCKING "I FORGIVE YOU" AZIRAPHALEEEEE WHYYYYYYYYY (ALSO NEIL WHY. WHY. LITERALLY MY HEART-)

Couldn't cry because family was present + It'd been spoilt somewhat for me BUT NOTHING PREPARED ME FOR THE SCENES BEFORE THE KISS WHERE CROWLEY'S TRYING TO CONFESS AND AZIRAPHALE'S TRYING TO TELL HIM ABOUT THE POSITION HE JUST TOOK- UGHHHHHHHH

AND ALSO THE RESIGNED "DON'T BOTHER" OH. MY. GOSHHHHHH- CROWLEY :( MY HEART :(

also- the way the fucking way Crowley looked at Nina as if to say "I tried" and then at Maggie as if to say "I hope you do better/I hope it goes better for you" ffs

Also, again, FUCK METATRON- because this bitch walks in IMMEDIATELY after Crowley and then wastes absolutely NO time before bitching about him- literally "Always asked damn fool questions too"- not only is he manipulating Aziraphale into sort of believing Crowley would just fall again or he wouldn't do well by his side (DESPITE MANIPULATING HIM BY TELLING HIM THAT HE COULD MAKE HIM AN ANGEL AGAIN, MIND YOU) (imo, at least)

It truly is Aziraphale, Mr. I will make it better for you and Crowley, Mr. I never wanted you to make it better/ never wanted for it to be better, all I've ever wanted is you

The "Hear that? ... No Nightingales" literally broke my heart- cuz I remember reading some meta about it somewhere on here and when I was thinking about it to myself after watching, I could only think of how it sort of symbolised then end of their relationship and that broke me, ok? Especially when the Bentley played A Nightingale Sang In Berkely Square instead of its usual Queen- AND THEN HOW CROWLEY PAUSED FOR A MINUTE TO LISTEN TO IT? NO. LITERALLY STOP, OK. LIKE THE WAY IT SEEMS THAT HE'S ALREADY REMINISCING- HOW HE'S SO FUCKING DEJECTED AND FEELS LIKE HE NEEDS TO HOLD ONTO ANY PIECE OF THEM HE CAN BEFORE HE COMPLETELY GIVES UP- (AGAIN, IMO) BUT FUCK??????

On another note, however, how freaking adorable were Beelzebub and Gabriel??????????? They make me wanna 💢 🔪

No literally- Gabriel making only Everyday play on the jukebox???? Beelzebub recognising it????????? The FUCKING FLY MESSAGE ON THE BOX- shut up that's so cute, they're so stupidly in love- ALSO THE "MY HEAVEN IS WHERE BEELZEBUB IS" "AND MY HELL IS WHERE YOU ARE, MY SWEET"?????????????????????????????????? FUCKING SLAPPED- ME WHEN BRO. ME WHEN. GOD-

AND ALSO. THE. WAY. CROWLEY. AND. AZIRAPHALE. LOOK. AT. EACH. OTHER/ SHARE. A. LOOK. WHEN. CROWLEY. MENTIONS. APLHA. CENTAURI. LITERALLY ACTUALLY STFU OK? *SLAMS A DOOR IN NOBODY'S FACE IN PARTICULAR*

ALSO- CROWLEY TELLING AZIRAPHALE HOW HE PROBABLY UNDERSTANDS IT BETTER THAN AZIRAPHALE????? BECAUSE REMEMBER? IT USED TO BE THE OPPOSITE- ANGEL!CROWLEY WAS ALWAYS THE ULTIMATE OPTIMIST, THE ONE WHO BELIEVED HEAVEN WOULDN'T TRULY DAMN THOSE WHO ASKED QUESTIONS- AZIRAPHALE WAS THE ONE WHO WAS MORE CAUTIOUS- BUT NOW, IT'S AZIRAPHALE BLINDLY TRUSTING THE METATRON (IT'S BECAUSE HE LOVES CROWLEY SUPER FUCKING MUCH, BTW, FOLKS) AND CROWLEY'S THE ONE WHO'S LITERALLY DYING BECAUSE HE KNOWS. HE. KNOWS. AZIRAPHALE HAS NEVER BEEN NAIVE- NOT IN THE WAY CROWLEY HAD ONCE BEEN- BUT LOVE HAS BLINDED HIM-

oh, and i forgot to mention: THE FUCKING LIP TOUCH AZIRAPHALE DOES AFTERWARDS-

AND THE WAY HE PAUSES AND HESITATES AND THEN FAKES A SMILE SAYING HE DOESN'T NEED TO BRING ANYTHING WHEN WE ALL KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HE MEANS TO SAY

AND ALSO CROWLEY SAYING THAT HE NEEDED TO STAY AND TAKE CARE OF THE BOOKSHOP INSTEAD OF HIMSELF- AND NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT, WHEN METATRON SAYS MURIEL WILL TAKE CARE OF THE SHOP, HE MIGHT NOT REALISE IT HIMSELF, BUT MURIEL WILL ALSO PROBABLY TAKE CARE OF CROWLEY- IDK, MAYBE I'M JUST SPIRALLING OK-

god, if only they fucking talked-

Michael Sheen and David Tennant owe me oh so many things... someone pass it on to them, please, thanks.

#can you tell i'll be posting about them for ages now (esp. once my exams end???) #god- fuck- #good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 #aziraphale #crowley #anthony j crowley #anthony janthony crowley #maggie and nina #nina good omens #maggie good omens #the bentley #fuck metatron #metatron #god i loath that man/celestial being #gabriel #archangel gabriel #beelzebub #bildad the shuhite #bildad my beloved #ineffable bureaucracy #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #ineffable divorce

[andypantsx3]

Ok so the comments got me really interested and I had no choice but to try the game... THEY WERE RIGHT?! XAVIER (from love and deepspace) IS DEFINITELY SHOUTO CODED! So much so infact that it drove me up the wall.

You look at him and he seems so princely and calm and suave and then you play through his cards and that man is THE BIGGEST LITTLE SHIT KNOWN TO MANKIND. He is also very much "the way andypantsx3 writes shouto" coded. THE TEASING REMARKS IN THE MONOTONE VOICE, THE WAY YOU WOULDN'T EXPECT HIM TO BE SO FORWARD, HOW HE SEEMS INDIFFERENT BUT NOTICES ALL THE LITTLE THINGS, THE WAY HE IS SO SOFT BUT ALSO SO DAMN SEXY ABWRHFBEHBHFBDW-. ITS THE QUEIT ONES! IT'S ALWAYS THE QUITE ONES! Also not to mention how his cards show the most explicit smexy times (I mean they don't SHOW it but the implication in STRONG and I actually don't know if the other characters have more smexy time than this cuz I haven't played through their cards yet. I spent all my attention and time on Xavier TvT ) This mans got me in a CHOKEHOLD.

Oh the forever lasting curse of falling for shouto adjacent men 😞 I can never seem to escape. All these men are great for my mental health but not for my heart...

p.s I just realised he's already half way there with the silvery white hair and the blue eyes. AAAAA THE MORE I LOOK THE MORE I SEE THE SIMILARITES. RELEASE ME FROM THIS PRISON I HAVE BUILT MYSELF LOL

PRETTY BOY ALERT! PRETTY BOY ALERT! PRETTY BOY ALERT!

Hi Nene!!! Omg you are piquing my interest even more!! The way Shouto retains his grip on us even through other media.... Like one of my fave books resonates with me so much specifically because the main character plays on the same tropes of family reckoning and forgiveness as Shouto LOL.

Omg I have been holding out and resisting getting sucked into L&DS specifically because I already have so little time & brain energy to dedicate to writing under current conditions LOL and I don't want to pick up another thing that will take more time away!! But it is sooooooo tempting when you tell me this kind of stuff, my god is it sooo tempting..... Xavier, my Shouto-coded space prince....

#ask andie

[serxen6pity]

Christmas Eve

It's christmas eve, and Lumine decided to stroll around the downtown; making time for herself alone with no company. She's walking without directions, without any place in mind she could think of.

And a few steps later, she found herself stopping in front of a restaurant. Seeing some family spending their special night in a warm dinner with smiles on their face reminds her of those time where her parents are still here. She and Aether; her brother, would exchange their dishes and ended up making a fuss about whose dishes was better. Of course, Aether always let Lumine won that nonsense never-ending battle.

Now since their parents were gone in a car crash and Aether has his own little family and live abroad, Lumine misses them more. It gets worse when she walked passed an ice cream shop that has a 'close' sign on its door. It was a place she and Aether used to go whenever they were feeling blue since the day they realized that they only have each other.

Tears started coming down and the night is getting cold, so Lumine decided to run a little bit towards the big christmas tree in the middle of that big junction. It looks pretty, and maybe Lumine could have some happy memories spending her christmas alone even tho she has to suffer from the bittersweet memories she recalled a moment ago.

That was her thoughts until someone accidentally bumped into her and spilled his drink all over her winter coat.

She was shocked, indeed. She was ready to burst out into anger but a soft little boy's voice suddenly come into the person right in front of her. Yes, it was a boy who bumped into her before.

"I-I'm sorry miss... the road was so slippery and it was my fault. Please forgive me I'm really sorry..." said the boy.

Lumine decided to hold her anger and smile, 'it's just a boy, I shouldn't be angry. It's christmas eve.' she mumbled.

Lumine nods slightly and reach for the boy to give him some headpats. "It's ok. Next time, make sure to watch some steps alright? Are you here alone–"

"Teucer!!!"

Someone was yelling in front of the coffee shop near where they're standing. He has a ginger hair and seems like he brought some things with him; shopping bags and another cup of coffee in the other hand. He tried to run a little to where Lumine and the little boy–Teucer stand.

"What did I tell you before to not run around in a slippery road like this, Teucer? Now you don't listen to your brother, no?" the older scolding the little one like a pro, in a very lovely intonation without anger and high tone voice. It was so soft, to the point it melts Lumine's heart just hearing it.

"It's okay, sir. I already told him to be careful and no need to worry about it anymore." Lumine explained.

The guy then turn his gaze into Lumine, feeling really sorry about what happened.

And that time.. Lumine realized that the beautiful blue eyes he has and the gesture of a loving brother he owns makes her attracted.

"Still, miss.. I'm so sorry. I hope I could do something in return. Is there anything I can help you with probably?" said the guy.

"Oh I want you," Lumine said it; without hesitation–and impulsively. "Ok, I'm sorry... I want you–what I mean is.. your name. Yeah. Your name."

Lumine never felt like she wanted to burried herself down as much as now

The guy looked a little bit confused, but then realize he hasn't introduced himself before. "Right I haven't introduce myself, I'm Ajax. I'm so sorry this happened, Miss...?"

"Lumine." she greeted Ajax with a handshake. "And I'm sorry for saying nonsense before. You don't need to do anything, really." Lumine tried so hard to convince him.

"Okay then, how about a ride home? Or somewhere you wanna go? Surely you wanna visit some friends tonight, right?" asked Ajax.

"Oh, it's just me. I'm actually going to see the christmas tree in the junction." said Lumine.

Ajax was confused. "Alone?"

"Yes." said Lumine.

"Someone like you? I mean... you do have boyfriend right?" Ajax finally slipped out a question that was kinda inappropriate. But fuck that, the girl in front of him is actually cute and that he wanna protect her at all cost.

But the anwer to the question Ajax let out was a 'no'. And somehow, it makes him felt relieved? He shouldn't be like this, right? She's a stranger after all.

But it's not Ajax if he doesn't try to be bold. Few minutes later, Ajax and Lumine decided to spend the christmas eve together with little Teucer walking excitedly in front of him.

And little did the older know, Teucer was smiling so bright and start imagining if Lumine soon enough to be Ajax's girlfriend since that night.

#chilumi #childe x lumine

[ps1demodisk]

Changing our username to escape the consequences of our actions, are we? You managed to get a whole server shut down because of your manipulative bullshit. I hope the people you hurt can find some comfort in the fact that you will die alone. Especially if you keep treating people like this.

You can’t even clearly explain what the people you went after did. No evidence, no screenshots, nothing. Just your lies and manipulation and petty bans thrown at anyone you don’t like.

At the very least, don’t be a coward. You owe many people a massive apology, although I don’t expect them to forgive you. God knows I certainly don’t.

Ok so I'm gonna try and take this seriously but I gotta be real "changing our username to escape the consequences of our actions, are we?" made me snort so hard coke came out my nose so I apologise for how shittily put together this is but god damn it's hard to get your thoughts in order when you're almost throwing up

Anyway maybe go ask the spy (because i know that's why it(i checked pronouns, its bio only lists it/its) followed, and i haven't blocked because im not trying to hide) who you sent to my main twitter account to verify this shit before you talk to me cause I told it "My profile is open, I only have hob blocked, I only changed my username because I felt disconnected from my old one. You don't need to worry about me trying to wiggle back in or whatever."

I never tried to hide, if I was trying to hide I'd have shut down all my accounts before changing my name, I don't want to hide. "You can't even clearly explain what the people you went after did. No evidence, no screenshots, nothing." Ok. I can't gather screenshots from servers I'm not in, I explained myself clearly as I could given the fact I still have not had anything explained to me outside of what one person told me and you guys for some reason don't care about that part of any of it so it doesn't help me address shit. The Doc I posted on my old nsfw is the best I could do with the lack of information. My only regret is that I remembered extra details too late to edit them into the doc.

You and the rest of them are essentially a group of highschool children, that's how you're acting. You whisper behind your hands to each other and claim to want to protect people from the big scary evil master manipulator [Kalista] but when someone asks you what I did you act like nothing happened unless it's someone you think will fall for your shit. I do not believe there's substance 99% of whatever you guys have against me that could justify the reaction on that fact alone. Not to mention how STILL, screenshots are shared of me having flashbacks to being RAPED, and you treat it like evidence I'm the devil.

When you guys want to be civil and at the very fucking least stop wishing death on me and sharing that screenshot (and again Hobqueer is fully aware i was having flashbacks, I told him the day after in DMs when he pretended like he cared) then you can come talk to me about how evil I am.

"Don't be a coward" go fuck yourself, Peachy. The call is coming from inside the house and you fucking know it. I know that's you. Don't tell me to stop hiding when you didn't even have the balls to send it off anon, probably cause you know "I hope the people you hurt can at least find some comfort in the fact you will die alone" isn't a good look.

Seethe, for all I care. Rot in your hatred, I welcome it. I don't see myself as a victim, sorry if that fucks up the narrative you constructed for yourself or others.

I have no desire to be in contact with any of you besides maybe two people who defo hate me but at least didn't say some unhinged top-of-bible-studies-class level shit, so like... you can "let go of hatred" now like you wanted to before. You don't have to waste your energy thinking up ways to make me feel bad, because it doesn't work anymore.

Should've tried this two days ago then maybe you'd have gotten more than a half-thought-out bait response.

#untagged

[uzumakisavior]

P:1/3 "I Love You, Dad."

Personal thought dump. The reason why I am taking a small break. I am just processing things. Daddy issues and paternal figure trauma. You're more than welcome to read, but its personal and not meant to be an essay. may delete later. not proof read. *sigh* WHEN i SEE YOU, GEGE!!! WHEN i SEE YOU, GEGE!!! Excuse me while I cry in the corner. I'm a little f*cked up right now.

A child witnessing a messy divorce isn't for the faint of heart. My mother wasn't one to forgive, even though she was the offending party. My mother would put my hands on my father and make him bleed. I only witnessed the arguing, and even still, it was endless. When they finally separated, she would leave me with her friends because she wanted to party (making me vulnerable to all types of things) and kept me in a room with a movie so I wouldn't disturb her. To my mother, I was an inconvenience to her selfish desires. I witnessed my mother do things a child shouldn't know. My life was unstable and all i wanted was genuine love. My aunt would come to visit me, and years later she'd tell me, "Lillian, you would cry and ask to live with me. You told me that being with Mom made you feel like a "Bird Locked In A Cage."

But my father? My father was tall, lean, handsome (so I've heard. But i have pictures to prove it. And i like to say I get the better part of my looks from him. ), and well mannered. His long, ebony, black hair and pale skin would compliment each other perfectly. I was gifted with his almond eyes and high cheekbones. He loved his culture. His identity was important to him, and he was never one to rage. I would never, ever, witness him lose his temper. Not even with my mother.

I always felt safe and secure with my father. He spent time to talk to me. We would play tag and video games together. He bought me my first Nintendo Game Boy. He would help me at the monkey bars in the park. I got A's in my school projects thanks to his help. My sibling and I would cuddle him while we watched a movie before bed.

Visitation with my Dad was day and night compared to life with my mother. I have memories where I forced myself to stay up all night so he wouldn't leave. It was a battle to keep my eyes open. His arms wrapped around me while I rested on his chest. When I was with him I was free to be me. I was safe. I was loved. I was important. All of us were a priority under his care, and I felt it when he embraced me. My abuse at home would cease whenever I saw his face. And yet, time with my Dad was always cut short by those custody orders.

He kept his long locks in a braid or low ponytail. It sported such a shine, lol, he might as well have modeled a shampoo commercial. It was straight as a board. Not a curl in sight. I was fascinated. I wanted hair that whimsical. I wanted the hair of a princess, like my dad. It was strange because he was supposed to be a boy, and my hip length hair couldn't compare.

"Dad, can I brush your hair?"

"Hm? Yeah. Sure."

He was sitting on his futon reading a magazine. He leaned back, legs crossed and shoulders relaxed.

I was only five. Maybe six. My little hands would reach up and grab sections of his hair. The way the strands felt against my palms fascinated me. I'd toss it, swing it, pull it gently to see if it would break. I'd even let his hair glide down my hands like a lustrous dark waterfall.

"Dad, promise me! Don't ever cut your hair ok?"

"Alright, " he chuckled, "Why is that, Lillian?"

"Because one day, Imma jump rope with it!!! It's already so long!!!" I was so excited at the idea, I began twisting 2 sections like a rope and pretended to play double-dutch.

"I promise. No worries." His voice was always so gentle and loving. Always soft for his children. I was one of three.

As I smoothed out his hair I proclaim:

"Dad, I love you."

----

#Im miss you dad #I miss the version of you i knew #She took me from you #right when I needed you the most #I was your one and only daughter #I am tasked to forgive her but i just can't #personal #save #dad