#and how demoralizing and dehumanizing it is

[marisatomay]

“you don’t owe anyone anything” actually you owe everyone everything!!! you OWE your table server and your coworkers and the elderly person you pass on the street and the dog on its walk and the child toddling along in the park and the driver trying to merge next to you and the pregnant person standing on public transport KINDNESS in return for theirs!! the connections we build are what give life meaning!!!

#a buddy of mine is a server and is getting ROASTED on twitter for complaining about #how often nowadays people will just completely ignore her when she greets them and asks how they are and what can she get them started with #and when they DO finally acknowledge that she Exists they’re rude about it all #and how demoralizing and dehumanizing it is #and of course people have taken this and decided that being told it’s rude to ignore that your server exists is actually ableist #like jesus fucking christ you people can’t do anything huh #like i’m serious i’m ND and have terrible days where i go mute sometimes and you know what i do? #do my best to not go out places that require social interaction but if i Must then i’m not a prick to the people i come across #because my issues aren’t their fault. and i owe it to them to not make their lives harder. #anyway i’m so angry for bailey people are so awful grow up and have some fucking AGENCY

[cryptidafter]

I wish people didn't have to see a carousel of dead bodies to care.

#I have struggled to properly articulate this since early 2020 but the...dehumanization that comes from mass suffering #the only way to get people to give a shit is to parade around the dead bodies of already marginalized people and I hate it #bodies aren't props! why do you need to see a child bleeding on the ground to understand people are being massacred? #why can't you LISTEN? #I haven't been posting about this here but I very much have been following and listening and hurting #because there is nothing more demoralizing and degrading than seeing in real time how little certain people's lives matter #I'm so sick of seeing blood and gore and so many people acting like this is some fucking sick entertainment #keep talking and keep calling and keep donating but don't let those photos stand as the only representation of a culture #celebrate people as they LIVED - share their stories - don't reduce them to bodies and numbers #anyway I'm fucking tired

[ftmtftm]

Saw a post that said "y'all don't deserve trigger warnings for this one" in regards to the atrocities in Palestine right now and there is something that makes me so indescribably mad about that.

Most importantly it is so deeply, disgustingly dehumanizing to the people in front of the camera that you are claiming to care for. Using someone else's trauma. Someone else's suffering. Someone else's pain. To in turn traumatize others? To guilt them? To intentionally trigger them because "they don't deserve it"? That does nothing. That does absolutely nothing.

How does stripping someone of their personhood and turning them into shock value trauma porn for the sake of proving a point to other vulnerable people do anything constructive?

What good does that do for the person in pain besides turn their pain into a tool to inflict further damage?

How does that help anyone at all?

"But it's awareness!!"

No it's not. That's not advocacy. That's not "spreading awareness". That's intentionally going out of your way to degrade, demoralize, and guilt people by preying on their sense of morality and using the horrors of genocide as a fucking prop for it. And you are a sick bastard for that.

#sorry i'm angry #dealing with. a lot of moralistic guilt for trying to care for myself in the midst of a very stressful life period #and this shit just bothers me to no end #because there ARE ways to help and contribute when you yourself are in a vulnerable place #and guilting those vulnerable people and telling them they don't deserve content warnings #instead of providing them tools and resources to productively contribute #and effectively rendering them useless to your cause #is so fucking stupid to me #you do NOTHING by creating nonfunctioning messes of guilt and triggered emotions #except create a bunch of functionally useless guilt ridden people #and you call yourselves leftists !!!! #original post

[linktoo]

I got an ask wondering about who is my favourite character in Disco Elysium, which I stand by my answer of being not really one in particular. But, Dora is one character I've been thinking about a lot and I think I want to expand on that.

The story is told through Harry's eyes, and regardless of his in-depth analysis of and narration of his attributes, it's unreliable. Undeniably so. This is part of the story, I really do feel for Harry's inability to move on. I feel for his aching loneliness, and his need to be needed. The crushing feeling of missing someone so achingly bad, only for them to learn that they have actually forgotten a lot about you and moved on is a feeling of deep rejection, devastatingly demoralizing and painful.  "I betrayed her, overwrote her, and happier for it" is a visceral line of feeling the alienation of someone you've lost to time, someone you used to know but has moved on without you. 

But I really can't help but feel so much for Dora's position in all of this. As a woman in a male dominated society your emotions are seen as both weak yet mature, you are constantly objectified down into pieces of meat, and seen as vapid and shallow when you put yourself first. When you choose to finally stand up for yourself, that is long after you've known better, long after you’ve been embittered by your initial innocence and first experience.

“You were my first. My first kiss, my first time to have sex.”

The game continues to emphasize how Harry loved her, how Harry missed her, and yet I get deeply uncomfortable with how her presence is described with her physique rather than her actual self as a person. 

“A dolorian figure, cut in black, moves below. It's still her. Her legs, her breasts, her hips…”

[...]

“‘No, Harry.’ She shakes her head. ‘It's just regular skin. I'm not as beautiful as you always thought I was.”

It’s reductive. It’s dehumanizing. It’s not about her, it’s what she represents. The most perfect goddess of a woman, put on a pedestal and quite literally turned into a deity. Not to be loved romantically, but to be worshipped as a religious figure. Worshipped for the violence and destruction she creates to degrade him and feed into his self loathing, and thus Dora becomes Dolores Dei.

There is a selfish hope and longing that comes with any sort of kindness or pity she give him. She knows that and her words are cautious, she has been through it before, and no longer feels any sort of way about it. She is vulnerable, she did used to care, she is sympathetic to his pain, but she firmly does not anymore and will not allow her empathy be used against her.

YOU - "But… that's not a very good way for things to be." DOLORES DEI - "It's not, but…" She looks at her feet. Little golden sandals cover her toes. YOU - "But what? Tell me there's something good…" DOLORES DEI - "I don't know why I said but. There is no but." YOU - "That's it?" DOLORES DEI - "That's it, yes," she looks up from her toes. "We've talked about it a million times. You will get over it, just like I did. People do. Things will get good for you again…"

I understand that detachment so deeply.

There is a pain to know men you trusted and cared and loved only to be seen as a reductive version of yourself. The one who is “nice”, the one who is “ethereally beautiful” and that’s… about it. You’re not good for each other. It didn’t work out. But by finally deciding it is best to remove yourself from that relationship, you are considered the slut that left him. You are considered the gold digger, the shallow bitch, the uncaring freak of a woman. We didn't really get to know about her and I don't think she was good to him either.

And I just can’t help thinking about that. I’m glad she’s happier now.

#dolores dei #harry du bois #disco elysium #dora ingerlund #linktoo rambles #we live in a society... idk what 2 say...

[viktoriamagrey]

Frustrating that few people talk about the fundamentally demoralizing and disrespectful aspect of AI "creations" for an individual person's identity. Voice actors have had to put up with their literal voice being stolen like some kind of horror story with no regard whatsoever for their personal autonomy. I can't even imagine how horrifying it must feel on a primal level, to hear your voice used without you being able to have a say in it. When AI discussion so often gets entangled with talk about laws and rationalizations about how "the process is very complex" (as if that changed anything about it ethically or mattered at all when technology is constantly changing anyway), it's important to remember the ways in which all these non-consenting people were abused and deprived of their rights as individuals, not a collective, theoretical group like some AI supporters like to see artists from all fields. These people have a unique voice, figuratively and literally, that feels special to them because it's theirs. It doesn't come just from training, or talent. It's a fundamental part of who they are as a human being because it is a result of their lived experiences. There is a reason making art is so important to so many people - it's an extension of who they are.

Having someone forcefully take something so personal to you to make a forgery of it as they see fit, and most of all, to hand out random people the ability to use what is rightfully yours, without your consent, is humilliating, dehumanizing, and vile. Going through entire databases of stolen art should make you sick. Hearing the voices of people saying things they didn't say should make you sick. Watching people make entire tools dedicated to copying someone's specific art style and themes like it's a sheet of paper you can pass around, should make you sick. You are not "copying" a mass of concepts, you're not "referencing" something, and what is just "harmless fun" to you shouldn't matter if it's a violation to the individuals involved. You're robbing the intent, and fingerprint of individuals to churn out what you want out of something you alone decided was fine for you to take. AI "art" is an ethical nightmare.

#And that's why AI art is at its core plagiarism especially when employed as a means to copy a specific person. #I absolutely despise how normalized it became to use AI to make blorbo say funny things #As if that's not an actual person talking who did not consent to any of this. #That's THEIR voice. Get out of your fictional world for two seconds. #voice actors I am so so sorry #anti ai #anti ai art #ai art is theft #ai art debate #anti ai voice #my text post #text post #discourse #my text

[fuck-customers]

while I hate all customers who are condescending, rude, pieces of shit, I hate the ones that worked retail and moved up in life more. some asshat who's never worked a hard job a day in their life, got a job with family connections, and money to get away with doing the bare minimum and has no clue what this job is like is being a shit head? annoying, horrible, hope you stub your toe everyday. someone who has felt what you felt, dealt with the same shit, and acts like a shit head despite knowing how dehumanizing and demoralizing it is? no fucking excuse, and I have this slight desire to hit you with a hammer. hope you get non fatally hit by a car so you have to deal with that shite.

@staff I HATE the new text editor!

[willelbyers]

there were dozens of men left stranded on those platforms. maybe even hundreds. men like kino loy, who got to the end of the race and had to stop right before the finish line because they were never taught to swim. men whose bravery was outdone by their ability.

and of those who did dive - i wonder how many made it to shore. i wonder how many men succumbed to their injuries sustained while escaping. i wonder how many slipped under the waves due to fatigue.

i wonder how many didn’t know how to swim and jumped anyway.

were there creatures in the water? riptides? chemicals? did any of the men come from planets unsuitable for salt? did anyone see a teammate get abruptly pulled under? did they fear it might happen to them, too? or did people see friends sink below the surface, wanting to help but knowing there was nothing to be done within the crush of people?

i wonder how they felt when they reached the shore, how many collapsed into the dust from exhaustion and how many immediately ran. i wonder if people found friends they were separated from in the escape. i wonder how they decided to stick together. was it an unsaid agreement? were they bonded in their trauma such that they never even considered leaving each other? or perhaps they argued about their best course of survival - easier for one man to slip through security than two.

i wonder if any of them promised to check in when they reached safety. if any of them got their feet under them on solid ground and realized they had nowhere to go. if any of them knew they had no one to go back to. if any of them went home at all.

and though the prison had wanted to demoralize and dehumanize them, those men had names. they were used as slaves the empire barely spared a thought for - but it was because of that ignorance that they could organize their rebellion.

now that they’re free, the empire will notice. the empire does not forget an insult like this so easily - they still have not forgotten aldhani. there will be no forgiveness. the empire will hunt them, just as they hunt cassian andor. even as they run, the imperials close back in on them. the escapees may be out of their cells, but they can never truly be liberated as long as the emperor lives.

when the empire arrives, i wonder what will happen to those men left behind.

#star wars #andor #narkina 5 #one way out #cassian andor #kino loy #long post #andor spoilers

[astrababyy]

Am I insensitive if I say that Rhysand’s treatment of Feyre UTM feels like psychological torture? I was talking to someone on Reddit about it, and the more I think about it, the more I want to vomit. It’s actually so disgusting.

I’m gonna put this under a Read More ‘cause it’s actually kind of hard to think about, let alone imagine.

Imagine being drugged, stripped, and groped every night so deeply and thoroughly that you have to spend hours recovering each day. Imagine that everyone but you knows how you behaved, knows every inch of your body and laughed at your dignity being shredded apart while you had to sit by and do nothing. Imagine having to suffer through something like that not once but daily for WEEKS, months even.

I don’t remember just how many times Rhysand put her through that, but going through it more than once would have me demoralized. I’d give up after that. Feyre’s dignity, her pride, her boundaries were all forcefully taken from her at Rhysand’s hand and that honestly makes me want to vomit. And yet, she still managed to keep going. I cannot express how much that says about her character as a person, but also how terrible of a writer SJM is for forcing her through that then just IGNORING how that’d affect her mentally.

There’s something so dehumanizing about it, and the utter disrespect for Feyre’s character to be written as if it doesn’t matter at all in the next book.

I used to say that there could be redemption for Rhysand, at least in Feyre’s eyes, if done well. But I change my mind. This pathetic lowlife, this sorry excuse of a character, doesn’t deserve the ink wasted to print his disgusting scenes, let alone a fucking redemption when so many others would deserve SO MUCH MORE don’t even get an inch of sympathy.

#anti sjm #anti rhysand #anti feysand #i hate him i hate him i hate him #he’s so disgusting #this sorry excuse of a character #u r fully within your rights to like this man #but the fact that there was no attempt at redemption will always have me turning my head #sorry not sorry #astrababyy

[thisweekinfandomhistory]

We're not gonna take it anymore! This week, Emily and V delve into righteous -- and rightful -- fannish anger at the constant, demoralizing, dehumanizing deaths of lesbian characters on television, and the straw that broke the fandom camel's back: the death of Lexa on The 100. Fans turned their heartbreak and rage over yet another dead WLW into a truly amazing, awe-inspiring call to action. Do you know how many dead WLW there were on TV in the season surrounding Lexa's murder? Do you want to cry your face off with your co-hosts this week? 

This Week In Fandom History is a fandom-centric podcast that tells you… what happened this week in fandom history!

#fandom #fanfiction #clexa #the 100 clexa #the 100 #clarke x lexa #lexa x clarke #lgbt fans deserve better #lexa deserved better #Spotify

[creature-wizard]

Continuing from where we left off about Svali, the fake Illuminati defector from whom all of those claims about color/metal/gemstone programming and fictive programming originate, we now reach chapter twelve, which is basically a bunch of supposed tips to keep the cult from reaccessing the survivor.

Svali claims that cult members are given an "E.T. phone home" alter that wants to reestablish contact with the global satanic cult. Basically she's claiming that if you ever find yourself wanting to go back to an abuser, it's not because part of you is nostalgic for the times that were actually good; it's because the Illuminati put an alter in you.

What's she going to blame on an alter next? Craving popcorn? Wanting to visit the beach?

According to Svali, basically any attempt from family members to get in contact with you whatsoever contains "trigger codes." Did your mom send you a birthday card? Did it make you miss your mom? That's because it contained an Illuminati trigger code!!!

If you see someone who reminds you of a family member and you find yourself missing them? Triggered by the Illuminati!!!!!

Phone calls from family and friends? They're definitely trying to activate your "E.T. Phone Home" alter. They aren't just confused about why you've cut them off ever since you started visiting that therapist who thinks Trump is working behind the scenes to save the children from the globalists.

Family send you a birthday card? The number of petals on the flowers is a trigger code. Or the color of the flowers is.

And if you think you don't have DID? If you think you're just a regular person with a shitty family you've cut off and just miss them because, y'know, that's a normal thing? Well of course you have DID, you silly little goose! You're just an amnesiac presenting system! You just don't remember the SRA because you have screen memories!

In chapter thirteen, Svali claims that:

Survivors of Illuminati programming will always have some type of hierarchy inside. This is because the cult itself is very hierarchical, and puts this hierarchy inside the person. What better way to inspire loyalty to leadership than to put the leadership inside the person’s head? Trainers are also very hierarchy conscious themselves. They know that a system without hierarchy and head honchos inside to direct things will be a system in chaos. They will not leave the person’s system leaderless inside.

But... wait, Svali, weren't you claiming earlier that all cult members were taught that it's kill or be killed, betray or be betrayed, that authority figures cannot be trusted? Literally how does this work? How is there any sort of functional hierarchy, whether among the member ranks or within systems, if all of this betrayal shit's going on?

Later, she claims that the Illuminati was responsible for human experimentation during WWII. Now remember that Svali's into that whole 13 Satanic Bloodlines stuff, so she's also repeating the conspiracy theory that Jews were actually behind the atrocities of WWII.

She claims that Illuminati victims today are taught that they are just an experiment, which demoralizes and dehumanizes them, and all that cartoon villain shit. She claims that victims are put into VR simulators and subjected to various modes of sensory stimulation/deprivation.

After the experiment stuff, Svali starts bringing MK-Ultra into this, and claims that alters can have assassin programming. Now just for clarification, Project MK-Ultra was a real thing, and it was beyond fucked up. However, it was the work of the US government, not a global satanic conspiracy. Furthermore, they basically discovered that no, there are no magic mind control drugs. But the Christofascists, who idolize the US government and hate drugs, can't really accept either of these things.

In chapter fourteen, Svali starts talking about spiritual programming. She claims that all children go through rituals where demonic entities are invoked, and also claims:

Trainers will invoke demonic layering during programming sessions. This is done after acute trauma. The person is asked if they want more pain, and they will always say ''no''. The trainer then offers them a way out: if they will accept a ''protector'' or ''protectors'' they won’t be hurt any more. The trainers will want this, knowing that with these ''protectors’'' they can shorten the training sessions. The protectors, or guardians, will reinforce the programming internally, without outside help.

This echoes what other known fraud Lauren Stratford claimed about satanic "spirit guides" in her book, Satan's Underground, just given a psychological twist.

She claims that the Illuminati has a sacred text titled "The Book of Illumination." There is apparently a real text with this title, but it has nothing to do with the Illuminati whatsoever. She claims that the Illuminati frequently worship Moloch, Ashtaroth, Baal, and Enokkim. She claims that children will be drugged and forced to eat the raw innards of sacrificed animals, which... not only is this gross, this is definitely a major health risk.

She claims that the Illuminati practices "resuscitation rituals," in which children are drugged, shocked, or otherwise tortured to the points where their heart stops. Then they perform CPR and bring the child back, and claim a demon resurrected them. Why they'd do this when this is such a massive risk and CPR CAUSES SERIOUS INJURIES is baffling - but then again, this is Svali, Queen of Edge.

She claims that demons can perform miraculous healings, another claim that seems to have been inspired by Satan's Underground.

And then there's more edgy cartoon villainy described here that's kind of just.. generic Christofascist fearmongering about the activities of evil satanic cults and their abusive behavior so like, I'm not gonna bother. If you wanna read it you can find it yourself.

In chapter fifteen - the final chapter of the first part of this two-part series - she talks about VR programming again, where Illuminati programmers can supposedly set up any scenario they like.

Then she claims that there's "denial programming," where parents will harm a child one day and then the next pretend that nothing happened. Because apparently in Svali's world, all shitbag behavior has to be the machinations of a global satanic cult, not just people being shitbags.

She claims that denial programming also includes children being given an orange, asked what it is, and when they answer that it's an orange, be told that it's an apple and be tortured until they agree it's an apple. Like, Svali, this doesn't make an effective cultist, this just seriously messes up a person.

Svali also claims:

Alters will be created as the child grows, whose purpose is to deny the cult abuse. If any leakage or breakthrough occurs, the denial alter’s job is to create a plausible explanation: it was a nightmare, a book the person read, a movie they saw, etc. These alters will read and quote literature that refutes SRA. THESE ALTERS OFTEN BELIEVE THAT THEY ARE SAVING THE LIFE OF THE SURVIVOR. They have been told that if the survivor remembers, and believes the abuse, the survivor will be killed, or the denial alter will be severely punished or shattered for not doing their job. These parts have a vested interest in their job: they believe their very existence and they body’s survival, depend upon them.

So, if you deny being satanically abused? If you tell your therapist that you don't have DID? Why, that's just more proof that you have been satanically abused and you do have DID!!!

She claims that the Illuminati induces "core splits" by means of severe torture methods. She claims that these techniques are also dangerous because they can cause autism if they don't work right.

Yeah, you read that right.

She's blaming autism on SRA.

#svali #satanic ritual abuse #sra #satanic panic #conspiracy theory #conspiracy theories #conspiracism

[vampirewhohuntsvampires]

I think a lot of my distress in life could probably be drawn back to spending my formative years being influenced by people who really didn't care for black people. And sure, it was better after I left, but that status quo stays in place wherever you go. When you're interacting with nonblacks, it's so hard not to be certain how they actually feel about you. It's demoralizing, it's dehumanizing, it's paranoia-inducing. I know to some people I am lesser, that I'm at the bottom of their hierarchy. Black bodies are always disposable. We're replaceable, we're not people to them, so it doesn't even matter. At best, we're treated like pets (and if we were their pets, they'd certainly care more), where we're just a small minuscule part of their lives. We're meant to fill archetypes and roles, 'their token friend', 'their teacher', and maybe the girlfriend/boyfriend, (but rarely the wife or the husband.) You hate the way our bodies look, except when it's on someone else. You hate the way our fashion looks, except when it's on someone else. You hate the way we dance, the way we talk, the way we cook except when we're on someone. You want the experience of having, us, but you don't want us. Us being in the picture isn't even a requirement.

And there are some people where I will never be more important to them than the white people in their lives. If at any point I had died, vanished from their lives (and I did), I would just be replaced. (and I was.) Nothing about their friend group would change, nothing about them would change. Their black friends were phases in their lives, they weren't people. We're trends. And I'm absolutely sick of it.

I finally figured out why I'm so scared of other people's opinions, of where I stand with them. I'm so scared of being a phase in other people's lives when others get to be permanent (or at least they'll try to make it that way.) I want to be fought for, I want relationships that last. I want to be loved! I deserve that.

When it's so easy for me to be killed as a black person, I want my disappearance to make a difference. I want to be remembered! I don't want to fade into obscurity, I don't want to be just another black face buried. I want to know that even when I'm gone, they'll keep me alive! That it was more than just a phase!

Do I know what the solution to this is? Not really, (I mean other than people starting to treat black people like people :/). To my black people out there reading this if you do, especially black girls and black trans girls, you are the realest and I know that this is like tenfold for you. Never stop living, i love you please survive and thrive forever.

To like, the nonblacks out ther, spread peace and love to your black loved ones asap. They should know they're not replaceable and disposable to you. That you value them, and you value the blackness that comes with it. And if you have trouble doing that, maybe you should unpack that

#most of this was rambling and conjoined thoughts from talking to other black people in my life #having black friends is the mind saver the heart saver the soul saver #and frankly #i should do more of a job of cutting people who make me feel this way and if i feel like it's engrossing on this i can tell them to knock i #off or i walk away #this world is violent to me and if they're not willing to stick by me #why should i be with them for the fun times too? why offer that kind of grace?

[roystonvasey]

i’m stoned so i don’t expect i’ll articulate this well but aj and i were talking earlier about the way that identity politics has been so terribly reduced from “queerness is politicized not only in the theoretical (ie the idea that everything is a political choice or act) but also in a real material sense wherein the legislating of queer and esp trans bodies seeks to demoralize, dehumanize, and destroy trans people and their sense of safety and community)” all the way down to “this person used words to describe themself in a way i don’t like” which is. obviously pretty bad. and sure there’s people out there using certain vocabulary to describe other people and not just themselves which is also sucky, i guess, but do we… maybe have bigger fish to fry, here? sure we could sit around all day debating who gets to use what slurs but is that… actually a productive use of our time? seriously? idk. i don’t care if people medically transition or not. i don’t care if someone wants to call themselves bi and a dyke. i don’t care if someone doesn’t feel like the word queer applies to them. it makes me sad and sort of uncomfortable to see people framing queerness as some sort of hierarchy where the more danger you’re in in your life the more authority you have to like, get mad online about the words other queer people use. like how about we address the root problem — the danger that people face for daring to exist as queer or trans or both — rather than the same kind of semantic bullshit spouted in queer- and transphobic rhetoric?

#this is about like five different discourse threads i’ve seen in the last week. taps the sign that says something like WE ARE ALL FREAKS. #THE ONLY WAY THROUGH IS TOGETHER. #and like yeah before some chode is like “’ohh but words mean things’ yeah sure. to an extent. i don’t care to enforce it as a rule #my energy is better spent idk. being a dyke in real life. experiencing joy and fucking and all.

[muldxr]

An outcast named Matilda

A close reading of Harry’s song and its literary namesake, where it strongly resonates the disabled experience.

Backstory: Matilda began as a children’s book by Roald Dahl - published in 1988. It was then directed and adapted by Danny DeVito into one of the best films of all time - released July 28th, 1996.

Matilda is a young girl stuck in a household with unloving parents and a hostile school environment. She loves to learn and reads several books a week, since she is basically left to her own devices at home. With her newfound telekinetic abilities, she hones this power and eventually stands up for herself, and at the end, finds her own family.

You were riding your bike to the sound of it’s no big deal / And you’re trying to lift off the ground on those old two wheels / Nothing ‘bout the way you were treated ever seemed especially alarming 'til now / So you tie up your hair and you smile like it’s no big deal

"You" = Matilda, right off the bat. Riding your bike, literally, perhaps, going from place to place and exploring the world, or, going through the motions and watching time pass by, saying that whatever you've been through is no big deal. The "bike" here is worn down and you're trying to just get by off the meager crumbs you get.

And here's the first link to disability, the first one I actually thought of when I first did a lyric read. Being deaf for me has always brought in a factor of communication struggles for me. always being told, "It's no big deal, never mind, I'll tell you later." If I had a nickel for every time someone told me that, I'd be richer than the 1%. Trying to do everything yourself based on this mentality and the meager love you get from being different.

"Nothing about the way you were treated ever seemed especially alarming 'til now": It isn't until you go out to a different place that may have people just like you, like a school or a special event, when you realize, how you were treated all your life by your family was actually dehumanizing and demoralizing. You internalize that ableism by telling yourself it's no big deal. "Tie up your hair" can be a direct nod to the ribbon in Matilda’s hair, or a coping mechanism or what have you, telling yourself, it's no big deal.

You can let it go / You can throw a party full of everyone you know / And not invite your family 'cause they never showed you love / You don't have to be sorry for leaving and growing up

The chorus; also, the part that resonated with me the most. It really emphasizes the subject finding a family (everyone you know/people alike them) and making peace with the insufficient memories of the past (not invite your family). The people that aren���t there don’t know the subject well, don’t love the subject, because the subject is so clearly different from them and wasn’t thriving in that environment. Now that they’re older, they’ve grown into themselves and their identity.

Matilda, you talk of the pain like it’s all alright / But I know that you feel like a piece of you’s dead inside / You showed me a power that is strong enough to bring sun to the darkest days / It’s none of my business but it’s just been on my mind

“All alright” may be a call back to “no big deal” - again, internalizing that trauma and pain of being ignored and hated into something lesser. Not allowing it to harm you, minimizing what you went through.

"A piece of you's dead inside." Link to Golden's "Hopeless, broken," / Lights Up's "The dark running through my heart" / Falling's "what am I now?". This part of me is broken, is not worthy, all the love I was supposed to get is not there, not nurtured enough. Major recognition of the loss of identity and personhood disabled people go through, wrangling with the desire to want human connection and recognition, when being treated like shit makes you feel dead inside.

"Power" / literal reference to Matilda’s power? Or the resiliency of experiencing trauma. I try not to take this as "inspiration porn", which is all too common when discussing abled people's view of disabled people, but the next line is exactly why I feel like this is important to bring up. He's acknowledging the subject's strength, their ability to bring light to the sad moments, of all those times it was "no big deal", of all the rainy hopeless days.

“None of my business...” Harry feels like he doesn’t want to entrench or ask more of the subject, but he cares enough to try to talk it out and learn. Very, very resonant of my abled friends who are willing to learn about my experiences.

You can see the world / Following the seasons / Anywhere you go / You don’t need a reason 'cause they never showed you love / Don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own

You can do whatever you want. You CAN. disabled people are always often told no, they can’t do this, they can’t do that, they’re lesser. But this part is so nurturing and positive, to reassure Matilda she can do anything she wants because she doesn’t owe the family anything.

I’ve never felt genuine love from my own family (mainly extended family but I won’t excuse my parents from this narrative). I know it’s different for everyone, esp with different disabilities and whether it developed later in life or you were born with one (in my case). This is traumatizing. It’s alienating. I don’t know family history. I barely remember my cousins’ names or know anything about them, because they never expressed an effort to communicate with me. So it’s hard to attend events and still feel left out, different, pitied.

You’re just in time, make your tea and your toast / You framed all your posters and dyed your clothes / You don’t have to go / You don’t have to go home / Oh, there’s a long way to go / I don’t believe that time will change your mind / In other words, I know they won't hurt you anymore as long as you can let them go

Welcome home, welcome to the party, welcome to the place where you can be you and not have to ask for anything. “You don’t have to go home” - “home” signifying the old place with the family, the subject’s cut ties with them and Harry’s saying that it’s okay to do that (yet he keeps saying in interviews that Home is not a place, it’s a feeling, with his friends, and That is Interesting)

“They won’t hurt you anymore” - covert/overt ableism can be avoided, all that pain and harm can be unpacked once you’ve left that family, and you can start to heal.

You can let it go / You can throw a party full of everyone you know / You can start a family who will always show you love / You don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own / You can let it go / You can throw a party full of everyone you know You can start a family who will always show you love / You don’t have to be sorry, no

FOUND FAMILY AGAIN AAAA. Finally letting go of a performance of “faking it”, of now being around people who Get It and, in my case, with whom I can communicate freely and easily. Found family is so fucking important, it’s a community, and in this case, it’s such a small world once you’re in it. And figuring out how to do things on your own, how to be independent, how to express yourself fully; these are all things I’m relearning because I was perceived as unable to speak for myself (pun not intended).

The last lyric is a reminder and an assurance to be unapologetically yourself, don't apologize for trying to mold yourself into a world that simply hasn't caught up to accommodate you yet.

Thanks for reading 💚

#harry’s house #meta #tw ableism #disability #this was Very Hard to write. like the most personal thing I think #also i know there’s a wonderful queer analysis of this!!! which is also Correct!!!!! but my post is for my disabled babies only

[jess-moloney-malarkey]

They are completely dehumanizing Jess on that blog. By making her into some kind of monstrous, repulsive, and evil creature, they are giving themselves permission to tear her apart, while feeling righteous and superior in doing so.

"Demonizing the enemy, demonization of the enemy or dehumanization of the enemy is a propaganda technique which promotes an idea about the enemy being a threatening, evil aggressor with only destructive objectives. Demonization aims to inspire hatred toward an enemy, rendering the enemy more easily hurt while preserving and mobilizing allies and demoralizing the enemy."

This is a real person they are talking about. A person they feel is fair game because she's dating a celebrity they claim to care about. What if they are mistaken in their assumptions about her? What if people submitting hateful asks are not honest? What if she's just a person like most of us, with flaws and insecurities, who is trying to find where she best fits into the world? What if Jamie cares about her very much, and vice versa? How would this make him feel that people are attacking her under the guise of protecting him?

Reading all that sh*t today is literally making me feel nauseous. Yesterday was an onslaught too. What is happening on that blog is so toxic and so irresponsible. The apparent delight they are taking in tearing down a complete stranger—one they claim to somehow have this deep and infallible insight into—is repulsive. 

They may say, "If you don't like it, don't read it," but they are posting it in the public Tumblr fandom tags for all to see. Google Jess's name along with Renell's or Ice Studios, and look at what comes up. That blog is responsible for what it publicly posts. We are all responsible for our own actions online, anonymous or not.

Yes. I 100% agree. And again, not to mention, the other fans they continuously put on blast. I'm tagging this in the Jamie tag because I hope people who are also reading that blog read this.

You can have your opinion about Jess and other people in the fandom, sure. But just like, a semblance of humanity too for the love of god.

#jamie campbell bower #jamie bower #jess moloney #asks i obviously sent myself :)

[starstofillmydream]

TBB S3E8: some thoughts

Spoilers below!

When AZI examined Crosshair's hand and suggested that his hand tremor might stem from mental issues rather than physical ones, it made me think of the phrase "it's all in your head" and how it relates to the clones as a whole. Crosshair's denial and disbelief over the fact that his hand tremor might be mental made me think about the TCW conspiracy arc with Fives.

Fives, after unraveling Palpatine's plot by investigating Tup's "illness" and discovering the existence of the inhibitor chips in the clones, was deemed crazy by everyone around him. Shaak Ti, Nala Se, Anakin, Rex, Kix, Palpatine himself. They all considered Fives to be mentally unsound because the whole idea of using an inhibitor chip to control humans and put other humans in danger was outrageous. When suspending your disbelief, it does seem outrageous. The severe paranoia and fear that Fives felt after figuring all this out made people around him think that he was going crazy and that it was all in his head. Knowing that you know a truth about something—the concrete truth—and then being told you're insane for believing it and holding it as truth is demoralizing. And it can even make you feel dehumanized because it's not "normal" to feel this way.

Fast forward to TBB S1, when Hunter told Crosshair on many occasions that the reason he was being loyal to the Empire was because it was all in his head. The inhibitor chip is making you do this. You're being crazy for betraying the squad and supporting a system that doesn't care about you. Crosshair insisted that he had his chip removed and that this was his free, independent decision that he made.

Now that Crosshair has defected from the Empire, reunited with his squad, and suffered torture and experimentation on Tantiss, being told by AZI that his hand tremor is all in his head has to feel really, really shitty. You were all in your head while you were with the Empire and now you're all in your head about a condition that impedes on your skillset as a sniper. How can you even begin to try to think independently and know objective truth if you're being told you're in your head from both sides?

Interesting (but sad as hell) to think about!

#tbb spoilers #clone trooper crosshair #arc trooper fives #sergeant hunter #the clone wars #tbb s3

[uservaulty]

oh look how empire doing everything to dehumanize and demoralize in order to keep prisoners fighting against each other instead of fighting against them

#turning prison time into competition to shift people's rage from them; so prisoners would be too busy trying to survive #instead of plotting and scheming #andor series #andor #sw #1x08