#and also where the terrorism etc. is

[not-poignant]

hello pia! feel free to delete this if it’s too personal but i’d love to hear about your degree, what you learned from it, and how you think it has informed the way you write (whether it has or hasn’t!). i’m studying for a different degree, still humanities, but i’d love to hear about your degree since i.. well when i was in hs i didn’t know that it was an option. also if the above is too personal, please recommend some texts to learn abt mass comms .. thank you!

Hi anon,

I did my degree/s (Media Studies + Mass Communications majors, Scriptwriting (Drama, Film, Short Film) + Creative Writing (Poetry, Short Story, Literature, SFF) minors) back in 1999, so honestly, some of the information I learned then is out of date, and you're definitely better off looking at a university curriculum now for decent texts on mass communications. Even the Masters I did over 10 years ago, lol. I am an old.

You have to understand when I was in university for Mass Comm, the internet as we know it, and social media, literally didn't exist. And though 'Rupert Murdoch still owns a ton of Telcos' is still true, things like Wikipedia didn't exist, lol. The 'please don't use Wikipedia as a reference' didn't exist as a sentence, because Wikipedia just...didn't exist.

The media landscape has changed.

I've kept up with aspects of media studies that interest me (representations of mental health in the media, for example), but since the university texts still often cost hundreds of dollars, I can't get a ton of them every year and read them. You might be surprised what you can find in university bookstores in the clearance section, because books aren't in the curriculum anymore but are still likely to be 15 years more up-to-date than what I was taught with, lol.

I don't really know how to answer your specific questions though. There were a lot of different units within the degree, so I learned a lot from it, I don't know how to condense that down.

Probably the most important things I took with me are that media (fiction) does not have a 1:1 correlation with reality, and that we are not all mindless vessels with an inability to negotiate the media we watch (otherwise we'd buy everything in advertising ever), people who believe 'high art' is better than 'low art' are elitist ignorant dicks who don't actually understand art at all (if you've ever disparaged reality TV or soap operas, you are in this category, with soap operas giving you a side order of heavy misogyny to boot), media literacy is crucial and needs to be taught and prioritised on par (if not higher than) english fiction literacy (kids engage in more media than books, they should have more media literacy than book literacy), and that it's always important to know the politics and values of the people who own the news media you're watching (and that almost all news media is homogenised).

The biggest gift it gave me was to entirely remove my shame over watching or consuming any kind of media. I don't know what a guilty pleasure is, because guilty pleasures are a sign that you have some more work to do on unpacking your issues (often internalised misogyny believe it or not) over watching certain shows or listening to certain music etc. and finding joy in it. I feel NO shame in anything I watch, rewatch, love, get the most out of. Anon, I have done assignments on Big Brother and gotten high distinction/s for it. I've watched Misfits and gotten high distinction/s for it. I'm in the Golden Key Society because I watched a lot of Studio Ghibli and a lot of romcoms. Media studies does what creative writing doesn't - unpacks all your shame over enjoying different genres (sadly creative writing teaches a lot of that shame and can genre shame as well, it's extraordinarily outdated in many curriculums in that way).

It is so liberating to just watch whatever the fuck I want, and listen to whatever music I want, and not give a shit whoever knows I watch or listen to it. Like, I just... literally who cares. It's all art. It all means something and then I get to choose its further meaning. I get to decide what media I won't consume and why (usually around the politics and actions of the creator/s or actor/s, JKR can go to hell, or just not liking the show - I also feel no shame not liking things that everyone else likes), but it's never a choice based in shame or guilt. It is...truly, such a wonderful feeling when you realise there's literally no reason on this earth to have a guilty pleasure if you can think for yourself and understand why you've been conditioned to feel 'ashamed' for watching certain genres (surprise, it's usually racism or xenophobia or misogyny!)

Like, I did a unit called Psychology, Psychoanalysis and Cinema (Psych Psych and Cinema as we called it), which was a tremendous amount of fun and let me know that psychology is literally in everything but that representations of psychology in literally everything tends to be not great lmao. I did a unit called Postmodern Wetlands which literally analysed the relationship between swamp representation in mass media (particular horror films as relating to the monstrous feminine) and what that means for environmentalism which changed my entire relationship to my body and the environment permanently. Idk how to describe that unit to anyone who hasn't taken it, but it was literally life-changing, lol.

It definitely influences my writing style, partly because I write serials based off of like... scriptwriting techniques I was taught for television drama back then. In terms of how media studies influences it - well mass communications probably not so much, and then media studies a whole lot, lol. (Mass Comm =/= Media Studies. One focuses on telecommunications/telcos/ISP providers/internet cables even, politics and the vehicles with which we spread mass media, the second one focuses more on the analysis of the products/works/pieces of art that end up on that mass media. One is a lot more discussion of 'which television stations do China / Fairfax / Murdoch own' or 'how are those internet sea cables going and how's the terrorism around that?' vs. 'what messages does the TV on each of these stations send').

But media studies influences my writing a ton, but I couldn't tell you how anon, aside from those two units I specifically mention above lol. Oh and the fact that we had to take a mandatory philosophy unit called Critical Thinking, which should be mandatory for every degree. That definitely taught me how to think critically, which...a lot of people don't know how to do! I probably couldn't even tell you the rest of how it influenced me, if you asked me 2 decades ago when I was actively studying it. I'd like to think it just makes me a more nuanced writer, and absolutely Teflon when it comes to fanpol / antis / anti-shippers, lol. But who knows!

I still think looking at current university curriculums for Media Studies (also known as Media Analysis in some other countries) is probably the best place to find recs. But you can also check out the books on media in my Goodreads list and go by star rating.

#asks and answers #pia on media studies #media studies and mass comm #they're both very different #you can do media studies and not know anything about mass comm #and vice versa #but they do go hand in hand #mass comm is still an area i find fascinating #because it's where the big politics are in the world #and also where the terrorism etc. is #but it can get heavy very quickly for that reason

[widevibratobitch]

ive been neck deep in fitzconte the last few days and it's amazing the things people can do with a character who has 4 minutes of screentime, says like three lines in total and also never actually directly interacts with the character the fandom decided is their bestie their pal their sweet cheese their good-time boy. and lover.

the cheetah is a homoerotic allegory yes yes we know.

#but the fics ive read. holy shit. there are so many incredible writers in this fandom. obsessed. #anyway. friendship ended with fitzier. now fitzconte is my best friend. #(<- a joke obv im a fitzier girlie forever and ever. but when you CONNECT the two... my goddd. now i feel im alive) #also its so funny how the fitzconte fics seem so much more like rpf than say fitzier etc cause like. #since we got next to nothing of these two in the show - the fic writers' obvious next step is to turn to their actual life history #since they were buddies irl and all. the clio shenanigans are just a well that keeps on giving. #where would we be without that cheetah fitzconte nation huh #the terror #fitzconte #i used to occasionally dab my fingers into this ship but now that ive read some fics where they're oh so delightfully toxic... im in love <3 #i still only like it in a very very specific way tho

[kyouka-supremacy]

Thinking about pre getting together sskk where Atsushi can sense Akutagawa is significantly more relaxed and affable with him when they're alone yet cold and mean every time there's other people around and he's deeply hurt by the change and them fighting over it and them telling each other “So you're mad I'm kind at you? What do you want Jinko” “I want you to hate me when we're alone too” because. yeah

#I don't have fanfictions in my mind I just have random line prompts that hit illegally hard #One could argue that Atsushi should be flattered Aktgw feels like he can drop the mean facade only when he's alone with him but actually? #I think that's exactly how Atsushi would react because Akutagawa being like that would trigger his terror of being– #inadequate / unworthy / not good enough etc etc #Let 👏👏 Atsushi 👏👏 be 👏👏 the 👏👏 immature 👏👏 one 👏👏 for once #But it's also specifically fitting for Akutagawa because for Akutagawa apparence really IS everything. #Especially where he was raised to think it didn't really matter how strong he was but whether Dazai recognized him or not = #how Dazai perceived him = how he appeared in front of Dazai = how he appears in front of everyone else for extension #They're so deeply fucked up... #atsushi nakajima #ryūnosuke akutagawa #sskk #bsd #bungou stray dogs #mine #Also au where I don't have to get a diploma where I would write thousands of sskk fics #Also I just feel like it'd hurt Atsushi so much because he'd feel deluded and betrayed‚ in the way #“once again it turns out that no one really loves me- at least not as sincerely as to show it in front of others” :( #3am trying really hard to study Hans Kelsen but I keep thinking about Them #Please may the next exam go well 😭😭 I actually care a lot for this subject #q. #10/09/22

[honorbright]

some visuals to assist (these are all in order)

#harry goodsir #the terror #the terror amc #AARRURUUHGHGGG...my darling little man #my angel my baby my silly rabbit...etc etc etc #i shan't say what my personal choice is that would bias things. #also you don't Have to rely on these pictures if u already have something in mind this is just in case people don't remember #tried to stick with ones where he wasn't in his wig but as with ep 8 i couldn't find any where he was vaguely in the center/focused on #and also where he had his hair out #also also i tried to keep these screencaps all fairly neutral. so sadly no half naked goodsir rubbing poison on his body here

[merrysithmas]

please give me a run down of what bo katan has done because I watched a summary of her life and all but I need to know I need to know and you seem to know

just reblogged a couple posts for you on this!

#:) #ask #anon #sw ask #basically the intent of bo katan was so display an unworthy mandalorian #that was her point in the narrative #its where all her cool points came from #the most painful thing is she essentially killed her own sister (satine who ruled mandalore) and now she is .... #going to sit in here sister's place as mand'alor #truly evil tbh #also you know how the Death Watched 'saved' little Din? that was a tactic of the Death Watch - the group Bo Katan was in #they would bomb villages and then indoctrinate citizens by pretend rescuing them from the bombing/terrorism they themselves caused #under the guise of using droids etc to stage an attack

[pepprs]

also ok . i know i have been irlposting way too much but my parents are going to a concert 2 hrs away tmrrw for a Very Famous Person and it’s outdoors but certain to be crowded and it’s like uhmmmmm. a little ironic and frustrating is all. not to mention i am afraid for my siblings and my lives a little bit and also for my parents lives or whatever. lol

#purrs #like the way my *** terrorized ne for wanting to. and i repeat. walk around campus without even seeing anyone. but now you’re going to an #outdoor concert and will likely be the only one wearing masks? idk. i don’t like it. and we have nowhere in the house for anyone to isolate #so if they get it we will all get it. and i DO NOT want to get it. i do not want it. i want it to stay away from me. my throat felt a tiny #bit funny on tuesday (it was ok i just swallowed something wrong) and was so intensely anxious about FEELING myself get covid by the second #that i couldn’t focus on my work and barely got anything done. and this feels like a recipe for disaster. like the absolute irony of our #family being on lockdown STILL and barely going anywhere and me having to fight to work in person 2 days a week with like basically 1 person #in the office who wears a kn95 / n95 at all times…. and then you go to a fucking ***** **** concert in one of the front rows where ppl are #gonna rush the stage etc etc. it just is scaring me. i know my mom would be devastated to not go but also like. lol. i missed my graduation #and all my senior stuff and i know it was a spike but it fucking sucked so why do you get to go to this concert when you’ve been to redacted #concerts like 50x in your life… idk. bitter and jealous about it but it just infuriates me because if it was something i cared about a lot #she would shut it down bc it would endanger all of us and now here she is taking THE biggest risk anyone in our family has taken since #my brothers graduation which was also outdoors at a concert venue but like. most ppl were masked and rates were rly low and it wasn’t a #concert. this is very different. idk. im so scared i will get it i do not want covid i od not want long covid i want my brain exactly the #way it is i want my body exactly the way it is i want my life exactly the way it is and it just feels uhhhhh unfair and cruel. lawl #ALSO NOT TO MENTIKN the part i left out which is like… what if someone Does Someting. lol. i will lose my shit all day tomorrow and all #weekend too. i can’t take it i really can’t #also ok yeha i didn’t finish that thought but like the double standard of it. ***** **** is her lifelong idol so she can go see him at this #huge fucking dangerous concert but i can’t meet up with my friends in groups of 1-3 outdoors masked distanced etc. like ok #it’s the whole im the parent you’re the child shit. well it’s gonna be really funny if she gets us covid after putting me thru hell in #2020 in ways that have permanently damaged our relationship. play stupid games win stupid prizes and this is the DEFINITION of a stupid game

[cherrymogai]

I'm trying to look through the Archivist's PK for anything that would be tangibly coinable as a treat, but it's literally just a quote from 160 in a typewriter font. Thanks this explains nothing to people. /lh

#cherry.talks #mod.jon #I was trying to see what it could possibly like as a gender request outside of just... Archivist. #Which is an extremely niche market of watching and terror and inhumanity and mouthpiece of the Eye etc etc etc. #But no that is all I get. Thank you very cool /j #Sorry followers for the lack of context. But also I have no idea where to start. #It's just kind of (eye emoji) I guess

[familiaanteomnia]

Low lighting, candles and the usual sort of environment. None of it necessary; maybe it was thought to be requirements. You’ll feel more at home if summoned in concrete and darkness. As if they even felt any emotions or really cared about decor. Requirements of summoning; whatever they might be was both elaborate and clearly not so much given how often random humans just tripped over intending to try reaching something, somebody else. The human standing there immediately jumped into how they needed to save the world, by purging the evil. Obviously full of high hopes, kindness all that attitude. Not cowering away at words; too focused on their self appointed calling. Something about them was different; connected to the Entity and this information was shared with no emotion. A connection, the universe formed what did it matter. Magic. Used to cause more light from the candle flames. Light levels never happenstance before; warmth which caused eyes to stare at the flickering and body to of it’s own will trying to soak it all up. Not to cast everything into cold, darkness but to experience the unusual sensations. .Conversations, back and forth like strange rivals but as well this pull. Annoyance of how they acted, behaved. Debate if maybe the connection was to teach the human’s natural emotions to them. One such case of obvious upset, causing the Entity to meet the rambling with an never happened before reaction. “Are you okay.” It came out rather flat toned, had known the upset before his appearance and it was unimportant. Yet something drew the Entity to- feel like should make the comment. Trying to ignore the shocked reaction from him. And then came the room leaving; reentry being rather dramatic. Speaking before he even could put words together. “Well that was peculiar, guess prolonged exposure to your oddities let me mimic what you call concern.” ------- Cold, dark nothingness or well maybe that wasn’t the best way to describe it. Nobody- nothing was ever going to ask for the description though. Pulled from there into whatever barely lit; grim space until terrified them and got pulled back. Often it was a mistake, or a crusade to defeat evil or sometimes desperation. Yet never with real interest in the being it made appear. They couldn’t grant wishes; or provide benefits and had nothing to exploit. Well probably things, people out there who wouldn’t mind using them as some weapon. Yet it wasn’t like could be held hostage. Nor would most who might consider it last long; care to keep such an presence around. Sorts of things, thought about analyticalally while apprising whatever figure stood before them. Easily took mere seconds to just tell what their fears, intents and crucial details. Where those details came from; unknown and it wasn’t like could relate to most of them- wouldn’t think to ask names either. Just part of being; one face- nothingness and then another one. --------- A human appearance, not for instinctual and business purposes was odd to put together. Countless facial expressions to mimic. Little dozens of things that added up into their existences; body movements. Keeping it together led to losing track of the mortal they’d ended up stuck with. Hands constantly flickering into static, smoky wisps despite all the focus to try avoid it. Noticing- what must be a child staring with wide eyes. Instinct wanting to terrify the child; yet given the promise they’d made the mortal... Debating over it until heard the recognizable voice speak. “There you are.” Yet he then redirected attention the young mortal instead. Tones; emotions that the entity could not grasp aside from a textbook approach. Barely paying any mind to the remark. Following behind as essence was forming into solid hands again. Deciding to tweak what came naturally for research purposes. Leaving the mortals, humans to whatever the kid’s problem was.

#trial muse: stolen melatonin #drabbles #(for that 1 specific verse- though could be a big factor in our Fear Entity's in lots of verses but i dont know) #(all i know is the thought of an super emotional kind spirited soul being connected to an emotions what's that i can cause so called terror) #(yet cannot actually feel it and is very smart supernaturally aware but also just like lol oh you're Scared dont care not my problem) #(im just picturing in a team up situation like all the flaws etc aside- where somebody else would be worried about the outcome They wouldnt) #(an top tier lore drop if i say so myself) #(my head is full of this muse right now)

[bakugoushotwife]

blessing and curse

summary: yuuji is a wonderful boyfriend...you just wish he was able to fuck you... warnings: post shibuya, aged up duh, yuuji struggles with ptsd, night terrors, as well as anxiety, you both see therapists, oral (fem receiving), penetrative sex, fem!reader, pet names, (pretty girl, baby, cutie, etc), rough sex. wc: 3k a/n: this is my first yuuji piece nom nom nom i'm actually obsessed and soaking wet tbh i'm thinking thoughts for yuuji.........anyway to my lovely requester i hope you enjoy this <;3 jjk masterlist here

yuuji feels things very intensely. it’s a blessing and a curse, though the latter is more often experienced than the former. guilt, loss, regret–all things that nearly swallowed him whole while he fought for his friends and the people of japan–for the whole world. it’s so hard to be him, to live with what he carries on his shoulders–on his soul. he’s unloveable. he’s the one who caused all of the pain—things would have been easier if he died. there’s a number of people whose lives ended because of and for him. he was only just adjacent to a murderer. months after the fighting ceased and the war was won, he would wake up numerous times through the night with night terrors. he couldn’t even call them nightmares because they weren’t fabrications of his imagination. they were all too real memories that kept making their rounds–reminding him that he would be forever burdened with a layer of hell no one else could claim to know about. 

he met you in the waiting room of his therapist’s office. he remembers seeing you and wondering what you could be talking to his specialist about. it meant you also had to be a sorcerer—clearly he couldn’t see a normal one about his specific traumas and baggage, and apparently neither could you. he remembers not even knowing you and his heart still hurting for the pretty young girl that must be hurting like him. he remembers hoping that you hadn’t been through anything like what he had—the anxious voice in the back of his mind wondering if somehow he caused your pain via sukuna’s rampages or the destruction and death that followed him. he remembers you meeting his eyes on a seemingly unremarkable thursday afternoon, catching him in the middle of one of his staring way too long episodes. you narrowed your eyes and tilted your head at him in amusement. 

the rest was easy. you were easy to talk to, to admire, to hold, to love. you made him feel intense things in a good way–in a way he had nearly given up on. his world had slowly become a mixed palette of blacks and whites and muted grays–but your smile brought color back. your touch made vivid purples and yellows; your laughter the brightest of pinks and the most warm oranges. you became the blessing where he was the curse, the savior of a damned man bound to paint on smiles and pretend that sacrificing his soul and everyone he’s ever loved was worth it. now he felt unimaginable comfort and love by getting to know you. his smiles weren’t so fake anymore—and the only things that woke him in the night was losing you. truly the only fear that yuuji itadori has left: cursing his blessing. 

you thought he was the best boyfriend around and an even better man. you’ve slowly but surely unraveled the reason he was visiting the therapist through his eventual opening up to you and telling you just a fraction of what he’s experienced in his life and you can understand his intimacy issues. see…yuuji is easy to love. he’s wonderful, attentive, sweet, careful, strong and chivalrous. but he won’t fuck you. you’re too nervous to push him any further—all too aware of his fears of letting anyone in, of loving and showing that in ways that make you vulnerable. he’s all too conscious of what it would mean—of the danger he would be putting you in.

there’s been many times here lately that you’ve thought that line will finally be crossed—heavy petting and make-outs that get you squirming in his lap and soaking through your panties. it always goes this way, no matter how innocent the two of you try to keep your dates. move night, game night, even cooking together ends up with yuuji’s tongue down your throat and his hands under your shirt. tonight is no different, some youtube video plays in the background—a forgotten video game walkthrough that yuuji had been paying careful attention to until you leaned in to rip it away with those teasing kisses to his jaw. you know exactly what buttons to press after four months of nothing past second base driving you to a point of restlessness. 

you just wanted him to see your perseverance. you would do this for as long as it takes, anything to prove that you’re here to stay. you want to make him comfortable enough to tear those walls down—the ones that make his eyes flutter shut and his hands fist at his pants in order to keep them to himself. his eyes close to will himself to concentrate on something–anything—other than the feeling of your warm lips tracing his pulse, smooth fingers sliding under his shirt to outline the dips and muscles of his torso. it’s not that he doesn’t want to this, he craves you like nothing ever before. your touch is the medicine bringing him back to life, but he can’t allow himself to ruin you—taint you. but as you move into his lap and change your kisses to more intense nips and sucks at his skin, his body betrays his mind. he can feel the blood rush to his cock as your thighs trap him beneath you, and he moans out at the same time you do. the pressure of your clothed cunt sitting against his needy dick has his hands moving before he can tell himself to stop. he grabs your waist, accidentally and automatically rutting up against the friction you offer with a hiss. 

“fuck, cutie.” he groans, your lips covering his parted and pouty ones to keep him from protesting further. his fingers only dig into your side as the two sides of his mind argue with each other. he wants you badly, your body slotted against his perfectly and the way you kiss him like you’re trying to touch his soul drives him crazy. anyone with a girlfriend as hot as you would be a fucking idiot to keep denying himself of her. his hands knead the warm flesh of your body as an instinct, his body knowingly responding to your advances. his tongue slides over yours in a frenzy, his head becoming fuzzy as saliva trails down his chin—something in him telling him to stop when his hands slide upwards to palm your chest. you cry out at the feeling—so starved for his affection that you know you’re soaking wet already. just his rough hands scraping over your sensitive nipples sends you into rutting rhythmic circles of your hips over the tent in his pants, breaking your sloppy kiss in order to remove your shirt fully in a silent show of what you wanted to happen next. 

“aw baby—you know i can’t,” he whines, his lips swollen and even pinker than usual. he drops his hold to your hips, making comforting circles over the bone beneath his grasp. your face drops to instant heartbreak and he can feel his own heart try to rip itself apart for making you so sad. he never thought about how this must affect you, a woman with needs and desires for her boyfriend. he knows this can’t last much longer or he’ll lose you anyway. the room is just a mixture of your heavy breathing and the monotone droning of the tv for a few moments, and then you whine in retaliation, picking up his hand and moving it back to your breast. you search his eyes, seeing the fear flickering in those brown embers of his. you just need to show him there’s nothing to be scared of, that you need him worse than you need the oxygen in this room and would do anything for him today and forever. 

“yuuji,” you gasp out in such a voice that he knows he won’t be able to hold back this time. four months of seeing your body in your cute date outfits and in his shirt after you’ve spent the night; the feeling of your curves under his fingers as he guides you to the safe side of the sidewalk or the swell of your hip as he guides you through the door he’s just opened—four months of draining his balls after he’s sent you home with nothing more than a few wet kisses and tit-squeezes. the way your eyes shine like you’re about to cry if he denies you one last time…it’s too much. “please—i need you,” you breathe out, reaching those gorgeously soft hands out to sweep against his cheeks, to plead with him to be a good boyfriend. he can’t make you suffer any longer—”i need you so bad yuuji, please don’t push me away…i’m your forever girl!” 

oh fuck. he might cum in his pants from hearing that alone. suddenly, silence falls upon his mind. he can only hear the echoes of your cries for him–no more voices in his head arguing about the best way to continue, only you. a guttural groan rips from his throat and he stands with your legs wrapped around his body, a broad hand snaking up your back to keep you pressed against him. you squeal a little at the sudden shift and the deep growl that he let out, his face now devoid of that playful man you’ve come to love. he looks so focused, so serious, his brow furrowed as he looks over your face. 

“i’m sorry i made you wait so long, pretty girl.” he nods, letting your body bounce on the bed as he’s set on immediately removing the remainder of your clothes. he pulls you to the edge, legs dangling over the sides. you almost think it must be too good to be true, sitting up on your elbows to catch a glimpse of that ravenous fire consuming his previously kind eyes. he’s leaned back to peel his own clothes off, but his eyes never leave your body. he looks over your lip pinched between your teeth to your pebbled nipples to the glistening slick coating your inner thighs. he doesn’t even know where to start, but he’s going to ensure that you’re finally taken care of. “i’m a dumbass—thought i was keeping you safer like that.” he mutters, leaning over to kiss the space between your ribcage. he makes his way to your jaw, licking a hungry stripe between your breasts and claiming your neck with bruising nips at the delicate flesh that greeted him. 

you’re set to mewling immediately, the flip switched in your boyfriend making you rub your legs together in anticipation. he chuckles and you can feel him smile against your skin as his hand snakes down to keep you from squirming. he quickly pecks your lips. “m gonna make it up to you now, baby girl.” his eyes are wide, but glazed over with affection. you nod, feeling his strong fingers dig into the supple flesh of your thigh to keep you from closing them, his abs raking over your sensitive clit as he lowers himself to his knees at the foot of the bed. your face burns as you realize what he’s going to do, but he doesn’t give you time to think about it before turning your mind to mush from the feeling of his fat tongue splitting your lips apart and breaching your tiny hole. he seems pleased by the way you react—back arching off the bed and hands gripping at the sheets from the surprising burn. it’s a good burn, the kind you’ve been craving for the months you’ve been with a man who loves you like he does, your wanton moans just cementing that his choice was the right one. he’s growing addicted to this already; your flavor on his tongue, your moans echoing in his ears and your thighs pressing in to the sides of his face. he feels your silky walls clamp down on his tongue, making his eyes roll back at the thought of putting his dick in something so tight. he slurps at the arousal slipping out, sliding his tongue to the hardened bud waiting at the top of your cunt. he wraps his tongue around your clit, making you jolt at the sudden increase in sensation. it’s amazing—goosebumps prickle out over your skin and you reach down to tug at the silky pink locks woven between your fingers. you can feel every nerve running through your body and how it builds with a fiery pleasure that you know only yuuji can give you. “oh my god—yuuji!” you cry out as that pleasure mounts to a tipping point. his teeth scrape against your hood to encourage you to fall over that line so he can see what he’s been denying you of for four achingly long months. 

you make the sweetest face when you cum, it has him closing a fist around his own dick to calm himself—the promise of having your pussy making him jerk at his own touch. you even sound so pretty as you shatter, legs jerking and your grip on his hair yanking almost painfully hard. it only makes yuuji smile wider, feeling a bubbly sense of satisfaction ripple in his own gut from making you feel so good. 

“nngh, yuuji–” you whine, your vision returning to normal after a few seconds of respite. he’s already pushing you back to the pillows, manhandling you into the bent position he wanted. you’re on your back, knees by your ears and a boyfriend giving you no time to be anxious about the angry and leaky horsecock sliding through your folds. you thought he was a sweet man, and maybe he still is–but his own excitement to have you has him forgetting his normal chivalrous behavior. “fuck–yuuji!” you claw at his biceps, fighting against that true splitting burn. his tongue was nothing compared to the girth he pierces you with—and he’s smiling so tenderly at your wiggling and struggling. 

“s’okay, cutie. you can take it, you’re already taking it!! didn’t you ask me to?” he raises a brow, face flashing with mock-confusion as your hands shove at his chest, all in an effort to get used to the feeling of him inside you. his thumb brushes your cheek, his other hand keeping the back of your thigh shoved back. “nyeh—you begged me! come on pretty girl–you gotta loosen up!” he laughs airily, moving the hand from your face back down to pinch and roll your aching clit. you jump at first, the touch sending another jolt of pleasure circulating to your brain–and then you relax enough for him to move. he’s got you folded in such a way that you can hardly breathe–or maybe that’s from how he slams into you recklessly, tip catching on your poor, innocent, cervix each time. it hurts, it burns everywhere—but it’s the best feeling in the world. his breathing grows ragged once he settled into a pace, brutally slamming into you in a way that led you to believe he wasn’t doing this on accident. 

soon, your hands around his biceps slip to your sides, eyes lulling into a pleasure-induced haze. you watch him, the twitch of his nose and the way his hair gets curly once it sticks to his forehead from his sweat. he’s perfect, and he’s finally giving you all of himself, really devoting himself to you, conquering any fear. you don’t mind if you’ll be bedridden for the next week—feeling his heavy cock in your chest from how hard he ruts into you—it would be well worth it to hear his grunts and whimpers of satisfaction, to feel the bruising grip he has on your body like he’s afraid you might disappear. it’s all so good, and exactly like you craved. “there she goes—takin’ it like a champ now!” he cheers you on, panting a little as he leans over your body and grabs the headboard, deepening his angle as if he wasn’t already fucking you brainless. 

the new angle makes your jaw drop in absolute earth-shattering bliss. you two could be the only people left on earth and you would never know—to consumed in yuuji itadori to notice anything else. you’re back to pawing at his chest, the coil in your gut building rapidly as he fucks into you like his life depends on it. you wanted everything, he’ll make sure he gives you everything. the headboard creaks, the bed moans with you and you truly do worry he might break it for a split second–but his broken moan of your name swallows up any wandering thoughts. a bead of sweat slides down the slope of his nose before it drops onto your cheek, the evidence of his hardwork. he moans your name again, warning you that the end was approaching. you nod as he moves your legs to his shoulders, leaning as close as possible to wrap you in his arms and kiss you in short, desperate bursts. he treasures you more than he thought possible, that look you give him right before your eyes roll back into your head from your orgasm makes his own dick jump within your vice-grip of a cunt. you make that sweet face again, a face he knows he’s hooked on—your pussy spasming around him to welcome his fat load gets him to make his own kind of special and beautiful face, lip between his teeth and adam’s apple bobbing at the same pace his balls slap into your backside. you swear you can feel his heart beating, his lungs filling and emptying as he flattens his chest to yours and fills your guts with his loving cum. he keeps thrusting even after he’s done, just watching your face contort and shift, your body bouncing in his arms. he likes the ache of overstimluation, and loves the way you mewl and hug him, eyes all sleepy and far away. 

“that’s it, you did it, so so good.” he praises in a soft tone, kissing your lips and then your nose and then your forehead with equal adoration. “can’t believe i kept us from feeling like that!” he shakes his head, kissing your cheeks to continue showering you in his love if not to keep you awake. he sits back up and slides out of you, quickly snatching his t-shirt up to catch the spillage. it’s hot, watching his seed trickle from your abused pussy—he whines a little at the sight, puppy dog eyes flickering over your body as if to wonder if you could take another round…

now that you’ve gotten him to start, you may never get him to stop.

#kyleewritesjjk #jjk x reader #yuuji x reader #itadori yuuji #yuji itadori x reader #yuji itadori #yuji x reader #yuuji smut #itadori x reader #jjk yuji x reader #yuuji x fem!reader

[armageddidnt]

Welcome to My Collection of Random Thoughts during my nth* rewatch of Good Omens Season 2

*only amazon prime knows the exact number at this point but I’m fairly certain it’s in the double digits

Episode 1: Gabriel’s fly lurking in the box when Aziraphale first takes it inside 👀

Crowley’s promise of “two minutes” basically means that he’s been homeless and living in his car for the past 4 years strictly so that he can be within 2 driving minutes of Aziraphale at all times in case his angel needs him I’m not crying you are

So here I think the key word is “fragile,” Crowley knows they are ostensibly safe from their respective sides but that could change at any moment so he’s basically spent the last 4 years in anxiety-ridden terror hovering as close to Aziraphale as he can to try and protect him from heaven, hell, and anyone else that would want to bring him harm after all that business they pulled in season 1 with stopping Armageddon

Episode 2: I just happened to pause the episode while Aziraphale is lying to the angels about his miracle and LOL Michael really outdid himself here (Sheen, not the Archangel)

Gabriel trying to swat flies and almost smashing the repository of every single one of his memories

I’m cAckling

So if Good Omens exists in Good Omens, does that mean Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett exist in Good Omens?? Do you think they based their Aziraphale and Crowley characters on Aziraphale and Crowley??

Episode 3: So I’m trying to find any hints or foreshadowing of the Gabriel Beelzebub thing bc tbh I did kind of feel like it came out of nowhere which is really the only issue I have with them. I found this one scene where Beelzebub almost ?? seems to be concerned about Gabriel ?? But it’s blink and you miss it and there could be lots of other reasons why Beelzebub doesn’t want to fail in locating Gabriel (pressure from/leverage over heaven, etc) so idk

More Foreshadowing Fly content 🪰

Episode 4: So here we’ve seen that Shax can just appear inside the Bentley bc she did it earlier to talk to Crowley. Shax only pretended to be a hitchhiker so she could be invited in because Azirpahale was driving so technically she needed permission to cross the threshold of an angel 👀

This scene will never not destroy me the 1941 flashback is the absolute sOFTEST thing ever to happen on this show

We really need more context here I need to see the Crowley-Furfur Monkey Rides

Episode 5: ahahaha thank you google translate for absolutely destroying my sanity this evening

POP goes the Ziraphale

Okay I know you can’t hear it in the gif but just before Nina takes Maggie’s hand, there’s a very quiet miracle noise, like Azirpahale literally MADE Nina dance with Maggie, he said I’m writing a Mina Jane-Austen-Ball-AU and my otp will KISS godDAMMIT

Azirpahale seems lowkey kind of manic this whole scene tho, he’s controlling literally everyone to force Nina and Maggie together and whenever Crowley says anything that pokes holes in Aziraphale’s Magical Jane Austen Ball Fairytale, Aziraphale just straight up denies it. He wants Nina and Maggie to dance and he wants him and Crowley to dance and he refuses to acknowledge anything beyond that.

Is this just Shax insulting Crowley for how much of a nuisance he’s been or a reference to his former status as an angel ???

They’re both completely dismissive of each other when they’re trying to say something important and that’s the main issue they’ve been having this entire season tbh

Episode 6: I think it’s funny that Crowley describes the angels as bees here because in the book, Neil/Terry describe humans the same way. Guess we have more in common than we thought huh?

So the metatron was the one who originally decided Gabriel would be memory wiped and not sent to hell, and he was also the one that decided not to sound an alarm about Gabriel for some reason and said ‘just go find him yourself’ instead. The metatron has definitely got his own agenda and you can bet he doesn’t want Aziraphale up there in heaven because he’s a “leader” and he’s “honest” like that’s exactly what Gabriel was and look where it got him 👀

There’s just something I can’t quite put my finger on about the metatron bringing Aziraphale a coffee from “give me coffee or give me death” and then asking Aziraphale if he’s going to take the coffee he’s giving him…

I have not seen a single person talk about this since s2 came out but Nina literally calls Maggie “angel” because that’s the term of endearment they hear Crowley using for Aziraphale !!!! I’m still going fERAL over this and I can’t believe no one else is eitHER

Something about this part of The Final Fifteen compared to this scene from the first episode is so representative of the entire season. Azirpahale keeps saying “my way or get out” and Crowley finally hits a wall and can follow Aziraphale no further. So he does just that. He goes.

I’m sure a lot of us by now have seen this post that brings up how Aziraphale literally pushes the remains of Crowley into his mouth and swallows and it’s the only thing I see when I watch this now

We still don’t know for certain if Crowley queued up this song to play on their way to the Ritz or if the Bentley started playing it all on its own and it’s driving me insane

Basically how I am doing after my Truly-Alarming-Number-th watch of this traumatizing episode/season. WELP hope you enjoyed this garbage dump of my thoughts and feelings time to go cry for a bit again BYE

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #my season 2 rewatch aka: I Went Insane #i am unwell #I haven't slept properly in 44 days and counting #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #crowley #angel #demon #armageddidnt-blog #armageddidnt-gifset #armageddidnt-screaming #armageddidnt-pain #good omens 2x06

[rayclubs]

Making a list of random Russian words I think Heavy would say so y'all can stop putting "da" and "niet" everywhere.

"Ну" - an interjection, untranslatable.

"Так" - "so" - another interjection.

"Всё" - "all" / "that's all" - usually used to signify being done with something. "Всё, I'm tired, let's go home." Can be used in conjunction with past tense to signify an intention. "Всё, I left. " ("That's it, I'm leaving.")

"Ну да." - "Yeah, right." - sarcastic.

"Ну да, конечно." - "Yeah, right, of course." - very sarcastic.

"Тихо" - "quiet" / "be quiet" - can be used literally, but also has mild comedic potential. Use it when someone is making a point that is factually correct, contradicts your point, but also you kind of hate it. "I am pretty good at chess." - "You never won against Medic." - "Тихо."

"Куда?!" - "Where?!" - use when someone or something is moving in a direction you neither expected nor desired. For a more obscene (mat) version, see: "Куда, бля?!"

"Давай" - "let's go" - can be used in a variety of contexts, including but not limited to: a suggestion, an encouragement, a sarcastic taunt, and a substitute for "goodbye". "Давай, see you later."

"Отстань" - "leave me alone" - said when annoyed by someone. For a mat version see "отъебись", for plural see "отстаньте" and "отъебитесь".

"Ладно" - "alright" - has a ton of uses. One I'd like to see is reluctantly agreeing to something you'd previously dismissed. "Ладно, you convinced me!"

"Короче" - lit. "shorter" - an extremely common interjection. Depending on context, can be translated as "so" or "to put it briefly". "The BLU team has a turret on the roof, a stickybomb ambush in the tunnel, and a Spy in our territory - короче, we are fucked."

"Хорошо" - "fine". Can be used instead of "ладно" or in the same sentence. "Всё, ладно, хорошо, you convinced me! Now отстань."

"Бывает" - lit. "Happens" - used when reacting to a relatable story, or when trying to comfort someone who just experienced an unpleasant but relatively minor thing. Not unkind, but not overly empathetic either. My sis said it when my cousin announced his breakup at the family table. Happens. Shrug.

"Надо" - "need" or "gotta" - used in response to someone protesting the inevitable. "I don't wanna wake up at 6 frickin' AM to do Soldier's stupid frickin' training!" - "Надо, Scout, надо."

"Жесть" - lit. "Tin" - not sure where the use comes from, but it's said in reaction to something shocking and almost always negative. "His head blew up. Жесть." Not a rule, but I would use it with a period instead of an exclamation mark, for emphasis.

"Ужас" - "horror" - same context as "жесть", but worse. Can also be sarcastic. Can also extend into a full sentence: "Какой ужас!" - "What terror!".

"Стой" - lit. "Stand" (verb, imperative) - wait, hold on, hold up a minute, etc. See "стойте" for plural. "Подожди"/"погоди" (plural "подождите"/"погодите") is very similar and literally means "wait".

"Спасибо" - "thank you".

"Пожалуйста" - "please". Can also be a response to "thank you".

"Всегда пожалуйста" - "always please" - a very lovely response to "thank you", basically means you're always ready to help.

"Не за что" ("for nothing") and "на здоровье" ("for health") - two more nice responses to "thank you".

"Будь здоров" - lit. "Be healthy" - "bless you", like when someone sneezes.

Will add more later.

#tf2 #tf2 language #tf2 heavy

[sweetpastillas]

i Love NPMD's subversion of the trope where the supernatural haunts the bullies who rightfully deserved it. you have famous horror figures in movies who hurt the characters for revenge, because those characters held some power over them or knew someone who did – think carrie white, or iterations of freddy krueger or jason voorhees, the latter's mother, etc. you have modern stuff like unfriended and subsequent films within the genre, where "the ghost did this because they were bullied by the protags" becomes the main premise. because the trope is a staple in horror, whenever it shows up we think the characters deserve these deaths for what they did to the victim anyway; we just come for the spectacle. the inciting incident itself always shows their pre-existing behavior and actions, and explains why the movie happens.

but the thing that NPMD does is give that power to the bully. max is able to continue terrorizing nerds because of what was done to him. the only reason we don't completely sympathize with him (i would love those fix it fics where he gets to change after the accident) is because we understand the nerds' point of view. they dont do it because they would get a kick out of seeing him humiliated, they do it to get him to stop hurting them. they do it to survive. thats why we know they dont deserve it.

imagine if NPMD was a super serious horror film, where the waylon house accident was a flashback only shown in the 3rd act? it would be a decently sized twist to know that our brains are used to expecting a sympathetic backstory to the ghost or an evil side to the gang when no, he was the asshole.

i also love how it subverts the other horror trope too. usually the aforementioned horror icons go after those popular kids because of a movie's intent to punish vices. people who party and fuck are meant to die. if it were any other characters like, let's say, teenage and meaner tom houston and becky barnes, they would be wiped off the board without a thought.

but the protagonists are the titular nerdy prudes. people who want to party and fuck but dont. who only could in a world without max's strict social hierarchy, when outliers to their group like steph could be able to convince them to.

i also dont know if this has been said before but man i love figuring it out now

i probably have more thoughts on this but uhh later I LOVE YOU STARKID

#starkid #npmd #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #npmd spoilers #team starkid #nerdy prudes must die #im sure im not the first to realize this but come on pls its so cool to think about #hatchetfield

[araminakilla]

Regarding Death Wolf...

Hear me out (NO, it's not the kind you are thinking)

We know Death has a job, right? To collect souls and most likely release them to the afterlife.

And for this job, he has to be there when somebody is about to die, as demostrated with him being there moments before Puss' eight death.

Supposing he is THE Death and he has been doing this since the beginning of time (or at least when there were enough stories of the Grim Reaper to adquire a physical form) that means he has seen a lot, A LOT of awful things.

Murders, suicides, massacres, death of infants, people who didn't deserve to die alone, animal cruelty, some other heavy stuff I won't mention here, etc etc etc.

And we thought "man, how is he able to cope with all of that? That job has to be utter torture for someone."

Probably many of you could think that he is able to do that because he is Death, and he was "born" with that purpose and only him can reap souls perfectly.

But while he is a force of nature, he also WAS a force of nature. Let me explain it well: He adquired a personality enough to be angry, excited, frustrated, amazed, happy, among other emotions.

While he has supernatural power and is most likely the most powerful being in the Shrek Franchise (or in Dreamworks as many say) he is also a PERSON.

Someone with a code of honor, morals, opinions, beliefs, etc.

Returning to the question "How can he bear all of that?" taking into account he is no longer an inevitable force, but a character of his own.

The answer is something you may relate to, and that is: Creativity and escapism.

To be the embodiment of Death, the guy is a very creative fella.

First of all, his design. I heard many people saying here and in Twitter that his design is something they would come up in their edgy, teen years of drawing their first fursona.

Guess what? They are right, the wolf form is someone's fursona. It's DEATH'S fursona. He clearly came up with this badass, piercing canine form to blend with the Fairy Tale Land assuming the form of the "Big Bad Wolf". He most likely had other forms he designed over the centuries and was able to present as them like if he were on a role play game in the living world.

His sickles? The weapon of choice with the little crossed cats on it to have a bigger effect of terror for Puss? Those who can become knuckles and join to create a scythe? Those are his creation, probably after thinking it for a while and writing all of those functions on a paper.

The way he presents himself? In the bar? The coins in his eyes as a "watching you" sign while being a cool reference to the Ferryman of souls? He transforming Perrito's forest into the background of a skull? The chilling reveal at the Cave of Lost Souls? The fire ring? It was all him.

As for the escapism part...

When the world becomes too heavy to deal with as real life issues tend to make us feel bad, depressed, angry... we tend to escape it somewhere. And in our time the common place would be the internet as in webpages or comics, stories, etc.

But what has to do with Death Wolf you may ask?

Well, while he would NEVER be able to escape his job entirely, he can have moments where he can enjoy a good hunt of people who don't appreciate life, like the whole plot of the Puss in Boots sequel could demostrate.

He managed to have a little time outside his eternal routine to chase an arrogant cat who took life for granted. He enjoyed it, it was thrilling, it was exciting.

It was a way to escape a monotonous, grim "life", if just for a short moment.

So, when the chase ended as his prey no longer feared him and now was ready to fight for his last life, the wolf retreats, happy for Puss' character development but resigned because he once again had to return to "The Eternal Duty"

And that's not even counting all the times Jack "I'm dead inside" Horner had to interrupt Lobo's hunt and remind him of his job even in his "spare time"

Death knew the chase had to end eventually, but he didn't want it to end.

He didn't want to return to his own world

And if we look at Death like that, then he is probably one of the most relatable characters Dreamworks has ever make.

In the Shrek Franchise:

Monsters can be loved

Princesses don't have to fit the perfect standards of beauty

Handsome guys can be possesive jerks

Love at first sight doesn't work like one would think

Happily ever afters had to be built and not just obtain them with magic

And Death is the most creative and "full of life" being in the world

Because he would absolutely go crazy with his life/work if he wasn't.

Because in a world of Kings, Poets and Soldiers, he's the Supreme King

And he's also a perky goth but none of you are ready for that conversation.

#100% sure that if Tumblr was a thing in the Shrekverse... #Death would have an account #puss in boots #puss in boots 2 #pib #pib 2 #pibtlw #pib the last wish #puss in boots the last wish #the last wish #death wolf #death the wolf #lobo muerte #pib lobo #puss in boots lobo #puss in boots wolf #pib wolf #pib death #puss in boots death #puss in boots analysis #character analysis #escapism #creativity #shrek #dreamworks shrek #dreamworks #this is probably the discovery of the decade #or the stupidest thing I ever wrote on this website

[janearts]

I couldn't help myself from referencing Highlander. There can be only one [wielder of the Netherstones]!

Proper answer (and some character analysis for Roisia) under the read-more.

Roisia was surprised by Gortash, but pleasantly so. In the first place, as far as Roisia is concerned, Ketheric and Orin recall their respective gods in their appearance: Ketheric is withered, a husk of a person, but indomitable, and Orin... well, Orin looks like a flayed corpse with meat-suit clothes, but close enough. Roisia would have expected Bane's Chosen to be more... physically domineering. Terrifying. Intractable. ...Loud? Instead, here's this charming handsome fellow who is really rather ordinary. If Roisia met him on the street, he'd just be another debonair noble lusting for power. (Join the feckin' queue!)

And neither does Gortash behave as Roisia would have expected Bane's Chosen to behave. She would have expected a Banite to be a tyrant, a Faerûnian-version of the Machiavellian prince, who instils a terror of himself and who rules through fear. Instead, Gortash gently curates among the populace not a fear of him, but a xenophobic fear of The Outsider (whether that outsider is a cult like the Absolute or a group of people like the Coast's refugees).

Roisia—by all accounts an oppositional force to his own—encounters a man who is genuinely, fully, confidently willing to partner with her to achieve a common goal and is willing to swear a divine oath to secure that partnership...

Poor man. What a fool.

You see, Roisia is something of a Machiavellian prince. She would despise to think of herself in that way were she to read Il Principe, but she has within herself some (but not all!) of the traits and qualities that are described within. She is frequently a mirror: where she meets evil, she wields evil with aplomb. ("You desire me to kiss your foot? I think not. You shall kiss mine.") She would very much prefer to offer mercy, but if her mercy is rejected—like when Ketheric imprisons Dame Aylin once again before yeeting himself into the primordial soup—then she will dole out cruelty in equal measure. Most importantly of all, Roisia is a liar and a deceiver, all while appearing compassionate, guileless, and true to her word. Roisia only really keeps her word when it suits her purposes. Were she otherwise, she would have found that Gortash would have been faithful to his word to the last. But as the Machiavellian prince, she betrays and slays him.

Actually, having written all that, Roisia is more of an embodiment of the Machiavellian prince than I originally thought: she is virtuous and good, sure, but she is also intimately familiar with baser behaviours (lying, cruelty, conspiracy, etc.) and wields those base behaviours like a tool when and where she feels it is needed and necessary.

Which is why I was absolutely thrilled when I had her do what was only natural to her and had her speak to Gortash post-mortem. Roisia is a character who believes herself to be godless: damned and/or abandoned by Kelemvor, Lord of the Dead and Judge of the Damned, for being a Necromancer. She had a sliver of hope that she would find favour with Myrkul, but Myrkul thought only of the Chosen stolen from him. She thought, perhaps, that she might find favour with Bhaal because, let's face it, she had slaughtered and bloodied so many in her long journey to Baldur's Gate, but the skull only wept blood and that was that. Bane, however, actually speaks to her, acknowledges her, validates her. She won his favour the moment she betrayed and slayed Gortash. She is in her very nature a stellar Banite. Incredible! And absolutely absurd. Thank you to Larian for programming that opportunity in. 😂

#Baldur's Gate 3 #BG3 #BG3 Spoilers #Gortash #Enver Gortash #BG3 Roisia #Act III Spoilers #Roisiacanons #rosecanons #roisiacanons

[mountainsandmayhem]

You’re Mine, Little Dove

(Joel Miller x Female!Reader) 18+

Summary: You’ve always loved walking at night, but an unexpected visitor goes from the most terrifying to most erotic night of your life.

TW: predator/prey dynamics, ropes, blindfolding, gagging, non consent, consensual non consent, oral, fingering, unprotected P in V, dirty talk, pet names (little dove, baby girl etc.)

A/N: I can’t say much without giving anything away, but this scene has been so fun for me to write. I’m tagging @untamedheart81 @beboldbebravethings @rav3n-pascal22 and @spookyxsam since you 4 wonderful people had such amazing support for my last story. And because delulu is the solulu, I’m also tagging @swiftispunk and @thetriumphantpanda because they’re both incredible creators and I truly admire their work.

🤍🕊️🤍 •• 🤍🕊️🤍 •• 🤍🕊️🤍 •• 🤍🕊️🤍

You’ve always loved the night, and since getting promoted at work walking in the dark has become your way of winding down. Your friends think you’re crazy, blabbing on about how it’s dangerous and you shouldn’t be out there alone. One even suggested buying really dark sunglasses and walking during the day. You all laughed at that as you sipped rosé, but it’s not the same. For one, the summer sun in Texas is way too hot most days, but it’s also too “peopley” during the day. You want the solitude and quiet that comes with the dark.

All day you’re interrupted and expected to do things outside of your lane. Take work for example, today you were asked to take meeting minutes for a meeting that the team you lead isn’t even a part of. You lead a team, and have an assistant of your own who takes meeting notes, doesn’t that team lead have an assistant who can do that?

Probably not. He’s an arrogant prick, you think to yourself. But he’s the boss's son so he gets away with it. And because of that, you agree. You always fucking agree. Always happy to help, never saying no.

Here in the night though, it’s just you. The night doesn’t ask you to do anything but sleep, which you will do after enjoying the cooler summer air on your skin as you wander through the park behind your house.

There’s also a slight edge of danger to it that entices you. The park is well-lit, but who knows what could happen in the darkness between the casts of yellow light from lamppost to lamppost. Those darker spots might be your favourite, just a few steps away from the safety of the light.

You stop in one of those dark spots, closing your eyes and tilting your head up to the sky, taking a big cleansing breath in.

Silence. Calm. Peace.

You hold your breath for a few seconds, silence ringing in your ears before you slowly exhale. Just before you open your eyes, two strong arms wrap around you. A hand clamps over your mouth, the other arm other snakes tightly around your waist, pinning your arms down with it.

Silence, calm, and peace, were quickly replaced with fear, terror, and panic.

A solid wall of a person leads you to the grassy, non-lit areas of the park and you realize you have never known fear before. The fun fear of a roller coaster or haunted house, yes; but never true heart-stopping fear. Your stomach drops and everything inside you is yelling to fight.

“Don’t scream, little dove.” A deep voice rumbles through you. If it wasn’t for his massive form holding you up, you’re sure you’d fall over.

This doesn’t happen here. This is a safe neighbourhood where you know all your neighbours. For a second you think it’s a joke, someone sneaking up on you that you know, but it’s almost midnight on a Wednesday. Who would be up at this point?

As he pulls you along your fear evolves into terror. You’re frantically trying to catch your breath through your nose as every happy memory floods through you. The sparkly pink bike you got when you were six. The first time you saw white sand and crystal clear blue waters. Watching your best friend get engaged. How proud your parents looked when you got promoted last year. What was the last thing you even said to your parents?

His strong frame forces you to the grass. He places a knee on your back, holding you down as he ties your hands with a scratchy rope. Your mouth is free as your forehead rests on the grass.

Scream. Now.

You open your mouth but nothing comes out. Why can’t you scream or at least look back at him to see who he is so you can describe him to the police?

Oh god, what if he doesn’t let you go?

Just as you open your mouth to try to scream again he gags you and then blindfolds you. You’re pretty sure it’s done with silk ties, but you really can’t be sure.

“Good job, little dove.” He coos in your ear as he helps you up. “You’ll be rewarded for keeping quiet.”

He leads you through more of the grassy fields. You try to map out which house you’re headed toward in your mind’s eye until you’re interrupted by the sound of crunching gravel under your shoes. You assume you’re in an alley or street as you hear the clicking of a car door.

Your overly conservative father's voice comes into your head. “You can’t go out dressed like that. Boys will get the wrong idea. You’re inviting them to take advantage of you.”

That was years ago. You’re an adult woman now, with a degree and a mortgage. You know your clothing isn’t an excuse for this man’s abhorrent behaviour, but maybe you should have changed from your denim skirt and tight black top.

As you hear the vehicle door open the panic begins. Your breath comes in shorter and shallower, and it feels like your heart is thumping in your throat. You’re sure your captor can hear it, or at least feel it through the skin of your bicep that he’s gripping so tightly. A whimper escapes you as he hoists you into a back seat and slams the door.

“Don’t cry, little dove.” He says from the front as he starts the engine. “It’ll only entice me.”

Fuck. Fuck. You’re dead. Or trafficked. How could you not have screamed?! You let him take you, but did you stand a chance either way? You could feel his chest on the back of your head when he grabbed you, he was probably a foot taller than you. His strong hand was large enough to practically cover your whole face. He was the predator…you were the prey.

You calm your breathing and focus on the turns the vehicle takes as it pulls out of your neighbourhood, not letting the tears fall, you refuse to give him that sort of satisfaction.

It feels like you’ve been driving for hours before you finally come to a stop. He hasn’t said anything from the front seat. No music played. As he turns off the car you can hear the sound of a garage door closing. You’re royally fucked.

The door near your feet opens and you scramble to the other side of the vehicle as your instincts to fight ignite. A strong hand grabs your ankle and pulls you forward. You kick blindly with your other leg, screaming through the silk that’s wedged between your teeth. He catches your other ankle, squeezing them both together with one hand and binds them together.

He hoists you over his shoulder and lays a hard spank across your ass, eliciting a squeal as the walls of your pussy clench a little. “Behave, little dove,” he says cockily. You can’t see him, but you know he’s smirking over how easily he overpowered you.

You try to say ‘fuck you’ through your gag.

“Oh, I intend to.” He says as he takes you inside and up the stairs.

He drops you down on a bed and undoes the gag. “Tell me your name.”

“Touch me again and I’ll rip your dick off.” You spit.

He chuckles a little while straddling you and lifting the hem of your shift, exposing the soft skin of your stomach. “I love it when my little doves talk dirty to me.”

He places light kisses along your skin and you squirm to try to get free, but his large frame has you trapped and your arms and legs are useless if they’re bound. A deep moan from his chest shoots straight to your core, sending a new wave of arousal as your body starts to betray you.

“You’re a fucking coward,” you say with as much hate as you can muster, trying to ignore the want that’s spreading through your traitorous body.

He lifts your shirt higher, exposing all the skin between your bra and denim skirt, continuing to place soft kisses and light nibbles along your skin.

“I only want to make you feel good, little dove.” He says in a husky whisper, “How does that make me a coward?”

God dammit he feels so warm against you. You push his soft lips and deep soothing voice out of your mind and focus back on the fear, terror and panic you felt earlier.

“Capturing someone in the night. Binding them. Real men aren’t afraid of the fight.” Taunting him is incredibly risky, but if you entice him enough he might untie you and you can fight like hell to get free. He couldn’t have taken you far.

His kisses cease. You almost let out a whimper of protest at him stopping. Are you this desperate for touch? You have a boyfriend.

“Is that what you think, little dove?” He shifts to be straddling your hips, leaning forward with both forearms on either side of your face. He brushes away some hair that has stuck to your lips. “That I’m not a real man?”

You can feel the bulge in his pants pressing against your stomach as you try to squirm free. “Yes, you’re fucking pathetic.”

His lips move to your neck. Wet kisses moving from your ear to your collarbone. You’ve always been a sucker for neck kisses and with sight being taken away, your sense of touch seems heightened. Shit, his lips feel good and at this proximity, you catch a faint smell of leather and cedar. He trails his tongue back up before gently biting your earlobe.

Fuck, a small shiver runs down your back and your breath hitches as you squeeze your thighs together.

“I’ll make you a deal, little dove,” he whispers, his lips brushing the shell of your ear. “If you can keep your breathing steady for the next 5 minutes, I’ll untie you and remove the blindfold.”

You feel dizzy by the closeness and gentleness of him. “And if I can’t?” You breathe.

“If you can’t…I’ll untie your ankles and remove the blindfold. I have a feeling you have beautiful eyes.”

You swallow hard, contemplating your options. He kidnapped you. He doesn’t have your consent to any of this, but based on the wetness that is now coating your thighs, your body doesn’t seem to get the same message.

You take a deep breath before saying, “Deal.”

Before the word has fully left your lips, he’s ripped your tank top completely open. His fingers work the front clasp on your bra as he whispers that he’s sorry about your shirt and starts placing hungry kisses down your neck. Your breasts are completely exposed to him, the cool air turning your nipples into stiff peaks.

“You’re fucking gorgeous.” He says as he cups both your breasts. His tongue swipes along the left nipple as his thumb caresses the smooth skin underside of the right one.

You remind yourself that he kidnapped you and try not to let your body and breathing betray you, but your thighs squeeze tighter for relief and your mind is swimming.

His tongue swipes harder before he moves over to the right one, sucking it into his mouth and rolling the other between his fingers.

He’s playing you like a fiddle. How does he seem to know exactly what you like?

He releases your nipple with a pop before gently blowing cool air on it. He latches back onto the left one, swirling with his tongue and your hips involuntarily buck forward as your breath stutters.

“Good girl, little dove.” He says with a low growl, coming back up to be face to face. “Looks like I win. Your hands stay tied, but I’ll free your ankles and take off the blindfold.”

His minty breath hits your nostrils. Fuck, my hands!! How could you have forgotten about your hands? Shit. You can’t believe you let this monster make you feel good.

He slips the blindfold off and you blink a few times, adjusting to the dimly lit room and taking in the man on top of you. Fuck, monster he is not. His curly dark hair is pushed back and you can see some salt and pepper around the temples. He has patchy facial that you couldn’t even feel when he was kissing you, he was being much more gentle than you thought. He’s handsome and rugged…if anything, this man is your type.

“I was right,” he says, his deep brown eyes staring right into you. “You do have beautiful eyes.”

Now that he sees you as a person, you might be able to elicit some sympathy.

“P-please let me go.” You say, holding in tears.

He tilts his head to one side, a small smile revealing a dimple that makes you melt a little. “Let you go? We’ve only just started, little dove.”

The fear starts to come back again as he shifts to untie your ankles. “Please don’t do this.”

He kisses up your thighs and speaks between kisses. “Sshhhh…let me make you feel good and then you can go home.”

You should kick or flail or do something, you had your best chance just seconds ago, but his warm, soft kisses had you too distracted. You start to think this man wouldn’t actually hurt you. But he is hurting you by forcing you to be here in the first place, isn’t he?

You look down at him to see him lying beside you, head propped in one hand near your hip as the other trails up and down your legs. His features are soft, eyes wholly focused on the tiny goosebumps he’s leaving on his skin. His hand slips between your thighs and tries to part your legs, you’re suddenly unsure if you’re squeezing them together to ease the throbbing of your clit or out of fear.

“Open your legs for me, little dove.” He says as he kisses the tops of your thighs.

You shake your head as the tears you were holding in roll down your cheeks. He’s right near your knees now, you could draw one up into his jaw, but those big chocolate eyes are looking up at you so lovingly.

He get up, walks towards the end of the bed and grabs your ankles. Like the flip of a switch, his look turns harsh and angry before he pulls you to the edge of the bed. Your skirt hikes up around your waist from the motion and he licks his lips as he wedges his body between your knees, spreading you apart enough for him to see you glistening for him.

“Tsk, tsk.” He says while shaking his head and lowering himself slowly between your legs. “Walking alone at night, in this little skirt with no panties?”

He lowers himself between your thighs and you begin to realize just how broad he is as your leg muscles cry out from the stretch. The rest of the room comes into view. There are handcuffs and ropes, along with paddles and whips hanging on the wall. There was no escaping this man, and your curiosity is peaked by the ropes you notice around the bed frame.

“Perhaps you’re not a little dove after all.” He taunts, looking at your wide eyes as they take in the room. He’s going to take what he wants from you and you barely fought it. You’re enjoying his words and touches, even more so now that you see how incredibly handsome he is.

“Please.” You whimper, making eye contact with your captor. Though you aren’t sure if it’s a plea to stop or keep going.

“You look even more gorgeous spread out for me like this. So wet. And warm.” He’s looking at your cunt like it’s the newest wonder of the world. “Doesn’t look like she has gotten the attention she needs lately. Does your boyfriend not know what he’s doing?”

His warm breath hits your core as he speaks, sending waves of warmth from the base of your spine out to your fingertips.

“He….” you aren’t sure what to say. You love your boyfriend, “he does. He just isn’t…skilled.”

A gentle kiss is placed on your mound, right above the spot that’s aching for attention. “Poor baby. Do you need me to take care of it, little dove?”

You clamp your eyes shut. You shouldn’t. This is wrong. But your traitorous pussy has other plans and you very quietly whisper yes.

His mouth is on your before you can even process what you just agreed to. A flat, wet tongue laps from your entrance to your clit a few times before he sucks your clit into his mouth. He groans deeply as he tastes you, sending a rumble straight through you. You cry out loudly and arch your back, pushing yourself into him.

“Good girl.” He says before doing it again. “I want to hear you enjoy it.”

His mouth continues to keep you on edge. Rotating between licking and sucking, adding pressure until you start breathing heavily and then easing up. You’re right on the edge, but he’s not letting you over.

“Please. Please let me come.” You beg.

He stops, looking at you with a cocky smirk, revealing that fucking dimple again. “That boyfriend of yours has been mistreating you, little dove. So worked up.”

You let a whine when he stops and begs some more. “Please. You feel so good.”

He slams two fingers deep inside of you. You’re so wet that it happens with ease and when he curls his fingers forward, right to that spongy part, you start to feel like your bones are dissolving.

“F-fuuuuuck,” you gasp.

His tongue begins to flick against your clit again, gently at first as he works you with his fingers. You can feel your arousal dripping down his hand and pooling under your ass. He starts applying more pressure with his tongue and you know that he’s going to make you come. Hard. And with your hands still tied behind your back you won’t be able to push him away when you become too sensitive. Too overly stimulated.

“Come on my little dove,” he says between licks. “Show me how good this feels.”

Your orgasm hits with a force you have never felt before. Electricity feels like it courses through your entire body and you scream out to the room, legs shaking as you cover his hand and mouth with your arousal. He doesn’t let up, sucking and licking as your orgasm feels like it lasts forever. Finally, you can’t take it anymore and you try to roll away.

“S-Stop. S’too much,” you gasp. “Please.”

He pulls his fingers from you, pinning your hips down with his forearm making you a prisoner to his tongue. He’s going to make you come again.

“I can’t,” you huff as you try to escape.

“Ssh, little dove. You can take it.” He keeps sucking and licking your swollen bundle of nerves.

Your body starts to shake, the word no escaping your lips over and over. You mean yes, but this man is overwhelming you with pleasure in a way no one ever has before, and you don’t know if you can take it.

He moans against you as he sucks, that same rumble from earlier, it consumes you and that’s what does it. You come again, grinding shamelessly against his face as he smiles up at you.

“Good girl. Fuck, I am going to ruin you for every other man. No one is going to make you come as hard, or as much as I will. Roll over.”

The fact that he’s taken you against your will is not even in your mind as you slide back into the bed to roll over. He pulls you up so your knees are resting right on the edge, fully on display for him.

“Such a perfect little pussy. And a perfect girl. Being so good for me.” You hear his belt and jeans hit the floor. Glancing back you see him naked from the waist down, pumping his cock in his hand. Your eyes widen at the size of him.

“No. It’s not gonna….I can’t do it.” You crawl up the bed to get away, laying flat on your stomach.

He climbs up behind you and hitches one of your legs up before aligning himself with your soaked entrance.

“Relax, little dove,” he whispers in your ear before gently kissing your neck. He pushes himself into you and you tense up at the size of him.

“You need to relax, baby girl.” He says deeply, “Take a deep breath. You can do this.”

You do as he says, looking over your shoulder at him and breathing deeply.

He pushes into you more, not breaking eye contact. “Good girl. Make room for me.”

He’s stretching you almost to the point of pain but you listen and breathe. The more relaxed you are the better it feels. There can’t be much more left for him to get inside of you.

“Almost there. You’re such a good little dove. One more breath baby.” Finally, you feel his hips pressed against your ass. He stays still for a second and you grind back into him.

“Fuck, stay still for a second. You’re so tight.” He gasps. Pride fills you that this big man can be brought to pieces by just the tiniest wiggle of your ass.

He takes a few breaths this time before he starts to move. He starts slow. Moving halfway out and then back in a few times. You need more.

“Fuck me,” you moan. “Please. Ruin me for other men like you promised.”

A hard smack lands on your ass cheek before he pumps in and out of you. He’s rough with you now, grabbing your hair and pounding as deep as he can after pulling out to the tip.

“You won’t be able to walk for a week.” He grunts before releasing your hair and spanking you again.

It’s euphoric. The perfect mix of pleasure and pain. You arch your back more and he lays another slap across your ass.

“You’re not a little dove are you?” He growls as he fucks you.

“No,” you breathe. Barely able to form a thought.

“Tell me what you are.” He says, slapping your ass again.

“I’m yours. I’m your desperate, cock loving little dove.” It comes out as a whine, your orgasm growing closer.

He doesn’t stop pounding into you. “Fuck. That’s my good girl. You’re taking me so well.”

You can feel your arousal soaking the sheets below you, and hear the squelching as he fucks into you. You arch your back again so he can brush against that spot you love so much. He reaches under you, rubbing tight little circles on your clit.

“Oh….f-fuck.” You coo.

“Yea?” He taunts, “You like that? My rough fingers on your beautiful little cunt?”

His words send another rush of arousal to your core, this is wrong. You shouldn’t like this, but you’re not sure you’ll survive if he stops what he’s doing.

“N-no. Fuck you.” You try to sound mad but it hits his ears in breathy moans.

“My perfect girl.” He taunts, “Come on my big cock. Squeeze me with that tightly little pussy.”

Your vision blurs as you start to gush all over him. Your whole body tenses as wave after wave of pleasure consumes you, moaning and squealing like a woman possessed. Your legs shake so hard that you feel like you’re in the middle of an intense gym session. Slowly you gain control of your body again and he’s right, you’re ruined for all other men.

“Good fucking girl,” he says as he pulls out and climbs up the bed. “You’re so hot. Open your mouth for me, little dove.”

He pumps himself over you as you roll on your back and open your mouth. His strokes and breathing become erratic as warm ropes of come hit your tongue and face. He lets out a deep moan as he covers you.

He leans in a kisses your lips, not caring about the come on your chin or cheeks, the biggest smile crossing his face.

“Let me get you a face cloth, babe.” He says with a little laugh.

“Thank you, Joel.” You say with a wink. “And please untie me, my hands are asleep.”

He laughs, “I would, but I’m just your unskilled boyfriend now.”

He gently wipes off your face before reaching back and untying your wrists. He kisses them gently before laying back on the bed. “Was that ok?”

You curl into his arms. “It was perfect, baby.”

“Are you sure?” He squeezes you reassuringly. “You seemed genuinely scared a few times.”

“I told you I was in theatre in high school.” You laugh to yourself.

He chuckles deeply as he rubs your back. “I don’t think all of that was acting…”

You glance up to see him smiling at the ceiling, clearly very proud of himself for making you come so hard. “True, I think we need to change the sheets.”

Another gentle kiss lands on your forehead. “I love you.”

“You too, Joel. Very much.”

———————————————

Tags: @wannab-urs

#joel miller #joel miller tlou #joel x female reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fan fiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #pedro pascal #pedrohub #joel the last of us #joel tlou #joel x reader #joel miller x f!reader

[mikkouille]

battle of 'i know everything my brain conjures late should not be trusted' Vs 'ok but also we have the face the fact that the cycle of exhaustion n anxieties now is keeping us insomniac and that the causes of that all are very easily identifiable' well in short I'm not having a good time

#there were many factors that made prev week in particular just. mh. #but i honest to god dont think ive reached a low quite this one before as in what. #whatever #i cant word it out #n then its silly also but im like cant rly #ugh its ckxkdjsj #dont want to worry dont want to burden its not like #its smth i can sorta win against thru Help rly n so to worry others is pointless in a way #cuz i know how i am but at the same time im wondering if im not already breeching that n causing worry #i kept wondering on thursday n friday sometimes cuz i was bordering panic the whole days n sometimes i just had those #uuuuu conjested breaths sudden remembering of it #n catching out of the corner of ur eye someone there glancing ur side #n its like dont mind i swear i was clearing my throat haha dont mind #im kind of... well its nearly the end anyway carry on pump out whats left in ya etc etc #but how much do i have left tho #thats worrying cuz whenever i go to bed n am kept awake for hours by terrors n shit. tremours and suffocation in here #n all those have a source they have interfaces even bruh its so... #well its kinda... #idk... #anyway its another weekend of lethzrgy that happened where none of the Things of Doom i promised to clear just a little bit got any progress #n now im seeing it looming there... #but its like. ultimatum. kinda. throwing it out cuz i feel if i dont write it out n throw it out im not going to be able to sleep #ya kno rip the bandaid open the gates n cry a phat load to exhaust yourself unconscious kinda stuff #cuz ill take the early train tomorrow so i need to sleep now #i need to sleep two hours ago but ive been laying there #feels like a defeat to grab the ohone n all but its like u have to lose some battles sometimes etc #yield some things to save most whatever #uhh hate this #its just so much...idk. so much everything. guilt above it all. its what hurts the most maybe. #well