#YAAAAAAS | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

imaginethatsupernatural · 2 years

Text

Imagine: Dean is reluctant to being a father.

TW: Nothing major, just some minor heartache here and there. Pregnancy is involved too but nothing bad happens with it.

I’m pretty proud of this one though! It’s a little long but the story just like flowed out of me lol sorry. It’s modeled after an imagine I posted the other week. Sorry if any of the tenses are messed up LOL. ENJOY! <3

This wasn’t necessarily planned. Hell, you and Dean being together wasn’t necessarily planned. It was slow at first, and then like a wave crashing down on you - you were in love with him. He was in love with you. And there was no more denying it. Things were wonderful, albeit a little frustrating with Dean at times. You’d been together nearing the 3 year mark. The two of you had always been careful in the bedroom, but you also never really talked about the “what ifs” of that not going to plan. That is, until there was no time left to think about it. You almost didn’t want to take a test because if you did, and it was positive, it would be real. But you had to, of course. Within minutes, 2 bright pink lines appeared on the test in your hand. You gasped. You put your hands on the sink counter to steady yourself. What would Dean think?

Telling him was not an easy feat, in fact it felt like it was to be a loss. You were nervous and scared…but also excited in a way. And you dreamed that he would be too. Dean was your wonderful, usually very loving soulmate and hell, why not have a baby together?

You sat him down that evening after dinner, privately. You took his hands and looked at the floor. He could tell you were off, and could tell you were about to say something to him that he needed to brace himself for. He just knew you so well,

“What’s goin’ on, (Y/N)? You barely ate, or spoke for that matter, at dinner…is everything okay?” He said, taking your hand tighter. You didn’t really know how to say it. You didn’t look at him initially. All you knew is that it had to be said,

“I’m…I’m pregnant, Dean,” You blurted out softly, letting the words marinate in the air before looking up at him. He was quiet. He was stunned. He then chuckled,

“Ha, that’s-that’s a good one, (Y/N), you almost got me!” He chuckled again while pointing at you with a nervous smile. But, when he realized you weren’t smiling, his demeanor changed dramatically. He straightened his back out, and his smile faded,

“Wait…wait, are you serious? You’re actually pregnant?” He said. You nodded. You still had a hold of his hand and as you went to take a tighter grip, he let your hand go. There was a pang in your chest. He stood up and paced for a moment or two,

“I didn’t plan for this, Dean, it just…happened. These things happen…” you said, playing your own devil’s advocate. Dean shook his head and stopped, looking down at you,

“No, no, spilling a beer or getting a popped tire ‘just happens’...this is…is this kind of a big deal here, (Y/N)...” He looked down and sighed. You stood up and walked over to him,

“I know, trust me, I know it is…” you stepped closer to him,

“But please…I need you-,” You stopped speaking before you said the next thing, knowing it could make it worse,

“Dean…” you said softly and put your hand on his arm. His eyes floated hazily to yours. Hiis jaw was tight,

“I…I want to keep it,” you said as confidently as you could. Dean blinked. He was a bit stunned. He put his hand over his mouth before exhaling and taking a step back from you,

“I just…need a minute…,” He slapped his hand gently onto his thigh and walked out of the room. This was not at all what you expected in terms of a reaction from him. You felt shattered. Heartbroken. Your entire world, shifted in an instance. You walked to the guest bedroom to stay for the night and cried until you fell asleep. And Dean didn’t come to you that night. From that moment on, Dean was not the same to you. But you stayed, hoping, praying to whatever was in the sky to bring him around to you. Over the next few months, things were actually going well for you and your pregnancy, thankfully. Baby had a strong heartbeat, and you were showing well by now. A cute, plump, round little tummy. You still had morning sickness but it came and went, amongst other trival pregnancy symptoms. Dean and you were still together, but things were very different. He barely showed you the same level of affection, though you were now sleeping in the same bed again. He gave you a kiss here and there, made you tea or decaf coffee, drove you to your appointments - but he always seemed reluctant to look at your bump, touch your bump, or even be remotely happy to hear about ultrasounds or things like where the baby will sleep. And it was getting to be a lot. You were nearing your wits end with him. You had half a mind to just leave and take the baby. Clearly he would be so much happier, right? On top of all this, you and Sam had gotten closer. Not romantically, but Sam recognized how Dean was acting and knew you needed someone. Because, well, you didn’t really have much of anyone else in a solid way.

One day, while Dean was out of the bunker doing some shape or form of errands he said he needed to run, you and Sam were at the table. You had received some gifts from hunter friends and diner workers you knew from town. Some small monetary gifts, but also things like baby clothes. Sam was fully into his uncle role. He picked up a newborn sleeper and shook his head,

“I find it hard to believe a tiny person is going to fit into this. I’m going to be like…the giant at the top of the beanstalk to the little squirt,” he said, which made you giggle. But then your heart felt sad. You felt your eyes well up but you stopped yourself. You looked down with a sniffle. Sam frowned. He folded the sleeper up and reached for your hand,

“It’s okay, (Y/N)...” he said softly. You shook your head,

“No, it’s really not, Sam. Dean…Dean should be here and he just…doesn’t give a damn. Not a single one. He doesn’t care. I don’t…I don’t even know if he loves me anymore…” you looked at Sam,

“It’s too much for me to bear. I can’t…” you started to cry. Sam got up and kneeled in front of you,

“(Y/N), Dean loves you…he does…he’s just…this isn’t easy for him-” He said softly again,

“Sam-,” you say, shushing him softly. You didn’t want to hear some sorry excuse. You closed your eyes,

“I know- I know you mean well, and you have undoubtedly been there for me through this…but I think I need to go.” You said firmly, opening your eyes to peering over to Sam. He was in shock for a moment and squinted his eyes,

“But…where will you go, (Y/N)? This…this has been your home for years now…” he says. He didn’t want you to go either. You shook your head,

“It hasn’t felt like home much lately…I’ll find my way…always do,” you leaned in and looked him in the eyes,

“Please don’t try to stop me. And…if Dean cares enough, he’ll come find me. Find us,” you said, putting a hand on your stomach.

Sam felt his eyes welling now. He sniffed and nodded. You leaned in and kissed his cheek. He helped you up and walked you to your room. That’s when he saw a suitcase and a couple bags packed and he gasped softly,

“You’re already packed…” He almost whispers. Sam knew at this point you had made up your mind. And could he blame you? Dean had been awful to you within the last few months.

Sam called for a taxi for you and loaded the car up, trying not to be emotional the entire time. He didn’t want you to leave but also knew that when Dean found out, he’d be in trouble. You hugged him tightly, and he hugged you back just as tightly,

“Call me if you need anything - any single thing, you hear me?” He said earnestly yet firmly. You nodded and gave him one more squeeze before you headed off into the distance in the taxi. Sam watched until the cab disappeared. He kicked the dirt on the ground and exhaled before he entered the bunker again.

A couple hours had passed and you found yourself at least two towns over. You made your way into a diner for dinner, not really sure of where you were going to go, other than to the train station across the street. You felt like crying every 5 minutes, but you absolutely could not let yourself be the pregnant person who cried every so often and disturbing the other customers.

Meanwhile, Dean had gotten home. He bought pie, beer, and an iced beverage for you. A small part of him still cared, somewhere in there. He called out to you when he got back. There was, of course, no answer. All was quiet. He scrunched his nose up,

“(Y/N)...Sam?!” He called out again. His anxiety began to rise ever so slightly. That’s when he walked past the table and saw something on the floor that caught his eye. You had forgotten to pack it. It was the sleeper Sam was holding earlier. Dean exhaled heavily, knowing he messed up by not being there for the opening of the presents. He took the sleeper with him and walked to your shared bedroom,

“(Y/N), look…” he said softly before looking up and realizing the light was out. He turned it on and noticed nearly all of your personal belongings are gone. He was stunned. Then suddenly, it set in. His mind began to race, as well as his heart. What has he done? Where had you gone?

“SAM!” He shouted and ran to the kitchen. Sam was sitting, reading, and enjoying sandwich. He jumped up when he heard his name but relaxed, as he knew what conversation he was about to have with Dean.

“Sam!” Dean shouted again when he saw him, “Where the hell did (Y/N) go!?” he roars.

“Dean…” Sam said calmly, “(Y/N) left. Took a cab a couple of hours ago…”

Dean ran his hand through his hair feverishly,

“And-and you just let this happen?! (Y/N) is pregnant, are you INSANE?!” he shouted.

“(Y/N) had made up their mind! Well and good, okay? Already packed. There was no going back. Maybe if you treated (Y/N) better, we wouldn’t be in this mess!” Sam shouted back at him,

“You don’t know the things I know, Dean. The times I had to comfort (Y/N), the times I was there when it undoubtedly should have been you!” He said, shoving his finger in the air at Dean. Dean’s breathing eased up but his jaw stayed tight. He looked down. Sam exhaled,

“I’m not going to pretend to understand why you’ve been acting the way you have, but it’s truly a sorry excuse for a man like you,” Sam said. Dean shook his head,

“Sam…Sam, what do I do?” he asked sadly. This caught Sam off guard. Sam blinked slowly and looked at Dean,

“What do you mean?” Sam asked. Dean threw a hand in the air and stammered over his words,

“I-I ruined everything. I messed it all up. I lost (Y/N) and now my kid-” He slammed his fist gently on the metal table before him,

“Is there any going back from this?” Dean said, trying to hold tears back. Sam could tell Dean was deeply ashamed and had more underlying issues about this than he originally thought. He sighed, walked to Dean, and put his arm around his older brother,

“I can’t tell you that (Y/N) would take you back at this point. I can’t tell you everything will be okay. But what I can tell you is the first steps to making it right - you need to go find (Y/N) and apologize - apologize big time.” He gave his shoulder a squeeze. Dean nodded and looked at Sam for a moment before he sighed,

“(Y/N) could be anywhere by now…I wouldn’t even know where to start,” Dean stood upright. Sam smiled softly and put his hands in his pockets,

“Something tells me (Y/N) didn’t stray too far…” he said matter of factly. Dean looked up at him, grabbed the impala keys, and raced off for the front door.

Sam was right. Yes, you were a couple towns over, but nothing too crazy. Your plan was this: leave that night, hope Dean comes for you, and if he doesn’t…take a train to another state. Start a new life. Forget you even knew the Winchesters. Of course, some of this was pregnancy hormones and your own dramatic flare, but it was your plan.

It was reaching 10 PM. The train station in which you were at was still rather busy but getting quieter and more eerie. Your train was to leave at midnight, so you just had to wait two more hours and hope no one decided to bother you. You kept your slouchy sweater tight to you and a bag on your lap hiding your bump. You wanted to be as to yourself as you could be. As the time ticked down and Dean was no where to be found, your heart seemed to break just a bit more each passing minute.

“What am I still doing here?” You muttered to yourself. You picked up your bags and walked over to the ticket window and smiled politely at the person behind the counter,

“Hi, um, sorry to bother, but my ticket is for midnight. Is there any way I can get it in exchange for something in, I don’t know, ten minutes?” You asked. The attendee took the ticket from your hand and was a little grouchy, but not mean to you,

“I’ll take a look,” he said, beginning to type fast on his computer. You nodded and leaned against the wall as you waited. Within a few moments, he handed you a new ticket,

“It’s for 10:55, that’s in five minutes. Have a good night, ma’am,” he said promptly. You nodded and thanked him. You hoped you could make it as you couldn’t run that fast, especially with all your belongings. Then, at long last - or so it felt, you reached the door. You didn’t really know how to feel. You closed your eyes and exhaled. Just as you were about to step up on the train, you heard a voice and loud footsteps,

“(Y/N)! (Y/N), please! Wait! Don’t get on the train!” someone called out. You spun around and saw Dean running full speed ahead to you. You gasped softly. You didn’t really think he would show up. You pulled away from the train and waited for him to slow down as he approached you,

“Dean…” you said to him softly, “...what are you doing?” you asked him.

“I’m…trying to stop you from leaving…I don’t-I don’t want you to go…please,” he nearly begged you. You scoffed with tears in your eyes,

“Are-Are you freaking SERIOUS, Dean?!” you cried out, “This-” you motioned to your surroundings, “Is what I had to do to get you to notice me? Want me? Care about me!?” you wiped a falling tear. Dean shook his head, barely able to look at you. He raises his eyes to your bump. His eyes lingered there for a moment, before looking into yours. He put his hands in his pockets and exhaled, while looking at you as best he could,

“I’m...I’m sorry, (Y/N). I know I’ve been distant and-and difficult...I don’t have a good excuse for not being there for you. At all. I’m just...scared out of my boots, here, (Y/N). You can give me that right? Given my past…How am I supposed to keep both of you safe?! How am I supposed to love another person this much with the fear of some damn demon or something taking it all away? I would never forgive myself if something happened…,” Dean got a little choked up but he composed himself,

“I understand if you want to go. I treated you like dirt, when you needed me the most. I just…I needed to apologize to you…a step in the way of making things right,” he said to you with sincerity. You breathed more normally now. You really hadn’t thought of his past and how it could have affected his conscience,

“You made me feel like there was nothing left for me here. You made me feel like…the love was lost and that you didn’t care. I needed to see that you cared…and here you are,” You said with a smile, teary smile,

“But, I’m wounded, Dean. It’s going to take a long time to fix this. You need to let the past go and accept the future that is happening now. Or, this-” you motioned to him and you,

“-will also be a thing of the past,” you said firmly, making yourself clear. Dean nodded. He understood everything you had said to him. Suddenly, he felt a fire in his heart once more. It no longer felt frigid and frozen in place. It was going to take time, but he felt ready,

“I promise you I will not let that happen,” he took a few steps up to you. You and Dean looked into each other’s eyes for a few moments before you closed them and kissed each other rather tenderly. You bit your lip softly with a smile afterwards and looked up at him. Dean then reached out his hand slowly and placed it on your stomach. You could even feel the difference in his touch,

“I am not letting you or your mom here get away that easily, you hear?” he said to your bump, which made the both of you chuckle. The baby kicked his hand and Dean gasped softly,

“Gosh, you have to put up with that for a few more months? Gonna have quite the karate master on our hands here…” Dean said. You shook your head and slapped his arm playfully. Dean smiled and embraced you in a hug, and kissed your head. The two of you strolled back to the Impala, Dean taking all the bags of course, and headed back to the bunker. Everything was going to be a work in progress. You had to rebuild a bit and learn trust again, but somehow, you just knew everything was going to be okay again - maybe somehow even better than before.

#YAAAAAAS #DAD DEAAAAAN #god why did they kill him off he did not deserve #why didnt dean get the vague wife and child too huh #gotdamn #i am still so salty that i don't even know if i'd ever be able to watch spn again #anyway #here you go friends #love u #supernatural #supernatural imagine #oneshot #dean winchester #dean winchester one shot #dean winchester imagine #angst #fluff #dad dean #pregnancy

74 notes · View notes