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johannestevans · 5 months

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Where do I find the queer people?

Making friends and finding social & community spaces as an LGBTQ+ adult.

Originally published with Prism & Pen. Also on my Patreon.

Photo by Brett Sayles via Pexels.

A friend and I recently went to a Queer Open Mic night after I saw it advertised on the same afternoon. While we were on the way back, she asked about how I’d found it.

“I just feel like you always know loads of queer events that are on,” she said, “and I don’t know how to begin to find them.”

I sat down with her a few weeks later and showed her some of the ways I find events, regular or otherwise, and where I look for others — especially given that on social media in the past few days I’ve seen a few people talking about the difficulty of finding and meeting with new queer people when not online.

I thought it might be useful to put it together here.

It’s quite hard with the pressure on and elimination of many third spaces to go out and easily meet people, and given that most of us use a lot of online socials and dating apps, it can feel difficult to seek out and engage with in-person spaces without knowing exactly what the protocol or format of the event is going to be.

Especially given that many people are still more isolated than they were before the start of the Covid pandemic, and/or struggle with seeking out events for themselves having finished school or university or other more structured environments, there can be a lot of anxiety about attending events or meeting new people. But it’s worth it to remember that pretty much everyone else is in a similar spot, and there’s nothing weird or unusual about wanting to make friends or have social time with others.

I am based in the North of England and generally go between the UK and Ireland. So this guide might be less useful depending on where you are. Obviously, in countries with more repressive legislation on queer identity, community groups will by definition be far more underground. Even in areas where this isn’t the case, some of these suggestions might be more viable than others depending on how densely populated your area is, how accessible different venues and events are, and how active your local queer communities are. So, just take what’s good for you and leave the rest.

Finding Local Queer Community Groups

In your search engine, put in simple search terms — [queer] [group] in [my area].

If you can, narrow your search to websites updated in the last 6 months to 2 or 3 years — you’ll sometimes find a website from six or seven years ago where the events haven’t been running for half that when you were already excited about it.

Search your town, city, or county first, and then widen your search — I normally initially look for Bradford and Leeds respectively, but then might broaden my search to West Yorkshire or even North England depending on the time of year and if I’m more willing to travel for certain events, e.g. looking up summer events around Pride, or specific holiday events if you’re looking at Halloween, Christmas, New Year’s, etc.

Combine:

“Queer”, “LGBT” or “LGBTQ”, “Trans”, “Gay Men’s”, “Lesbian”, “Transgender”, “Transsexual”, “Gay Rights” or similar terms

With:

“Charity”, “Support Group”, “Social Space”, “Community Space”, “Meetup”, “Society”, and similar terms

Swap around the terms and find what language seems to be used in your area — remember that depending on the age group and demographic you’re looking at or for, there might be terms you prefer.

I personally search for a lot of gay men’s groups because the average age tends to be a lot older and focused more on the experiences and social spaces of men who love men rather than general queer spaces, which I find can be a bit too young and fast-paced for my speed.

In general, I find that there’s a loose separation between younger trans and queer social groups, which tend to be a mix of differing identities and ages but with a big emphasis on young adults in the 18–25 area, and then specific gay men’s or lesbians’ groups, which will have a wider swathe of ages and might be a little bit less online.

I understand the fear some people have of these spaces being more transphobic than younger spaces — that’s not personally been my experience, as transphobia and lateral bigotry might happen in any social space, but unfortunately, you just don’t know the specifics of an event or a group until you get there and actually meet and talk to the people.

Some charities or community groups that run a variety of spaces might have specific age or identity guidance on group titles — some might be particularly for younger or older people, be for trans people more than cis people, and some might focus on particular sub-communities, such as BIPOC queer groups or specific religious or ethnic meetups, disabled queer groups, etc.

You also might find meetups that are centred around certain hobbies, professions, or interests — boardgames or Magic the Gathering, Doctor Who or fantasy novels, medical professionals or blacksmiths, etc, depending on how big the area you’re in is and how populous it is.

If you are already a member of an institution or society, whether that’s your school or university, your union, some workplaces, your temple or other religious institution, etc, you might find that there are already events running for you!

Finding Queer Events Online

There are almost certainly queer events on, and they’re probably advertised, but where do you find them?

What’s annoying about the Internet as it exists, corporate online spaces and otherwise, is that most events will be posted in one or two spaces out of hundreds. The good ones will sometimes be hard to find because there’s a bunch of shitty advertising in the way, and because individuals and small charity or community advertisers don’t necessarily know about things like search engine optimisation or how to make a good, searchable post. There will be really cool events that are advertised online, but just aren’t tagged or easy to find.

This means that it’s worth looking often but keeping it casual — glancing through the top page for events that might be coming up or meet some keywords, but if most of what you see is ads, just leave it and move on. Digging through for the good events in busy areas that are also ad-heavy can take ages and might not even turn up much.

If you find socials for local community groups or charities, even if they don’t run events themselves, they might regularly share other local events or cool ones, so it can be worth following them!

Ditto for other queer people in your community — follow local artists, performers, academics, creators, public speakers, craftspeople, or any local community leaders or public figures, and see if they share and boost local events.

They might boost special interest events that are of interest to you if you follow people who share certain communities or interests. If, for example, you have an interest in lolita fashion and follow queer lolita dressers in your area or in areas you can travel to, they might post events that are of interest to them and maybe to you — whether that means specific lolita events, other clothing and fashion events like gothic or steampunk markets and shows, or even anime cons or renaissance faires or whatever.

Obviously searching on social media can help — looking for keywords like “queer event” or “LGBT social” on one site or other can be especially good if it’s a site where you can localise your search results, such as Facebook or Instagram.

With that said, Facebook and Instagram are increasingly difficult sites to use given how much they’re overwhelmed by sponsored and corporate posts as well as spam and bot posts. So, it’s generally worth it more when you focus on either events in smaller and limited areas, such as small towns, or when you’re looking for crossing over of different areas of interest, such as particular queer hobbyist or interest groups. When you start looking for broader spectrum events in a busier or more populous area, you can get inundated by spam and copy-and-paste duplicate ads that have all been promoted. But it’s still worth it to have a glance and see if anything is up at the top!

Sites and apps like Eventbrite or TicketSource, or equivalents in your area, will often let you search for specific events . As with social media, these sites can have the same problem of sponsored events coming up first, and annoyingly you can’t block particular event providers or organisers to make sure they don’t show in your search results if they’re not your thing.

Use every option that comes up and see if you can cross search where you can — pick a particular location or area, click on free or paid events, pick events at certain times, pick a certain kind of event, add in tags like LGBTQ or similar if it’s a site that allows it, etc.

If an event comes up that you like the idea of, note it down, then look the organizer up on social media and see if they run or share other events.

Looking for local tourism sites will let you search for other local events as well — especially if you live in a city or regularly visit one, they’ll often have a What’s On page or a Visit [Blank] website or equivalent, and you can search through that — most of them will have cultural events or a specific LGBTQ section you can glance through.

Here’s the Visit Bristol site, for example:

What’s On in Bristol — VisitBristol.co.uk Click here to find out What’s On in Bristol!…Get the latest information on the latest Events, Festivals, Carnivals…visitbristol.co.uk

For obvious reasons, sites like most of the above will focus on paid events, especially evening and party events. Pub quizzes, drag events, bingo nights, balls, drinks offers, parties, etc.

These events aren’t for everybody — and if they’re not for you, focus on events that take place, if not in cafés and restaurants, then in libraries, universities, museums, and other public buildings.

Queer Events Locally Advertised In-Person

Wait, do people still do that?

Look for poster and notice boards in:

Libraries, museums, community centres, university lobbies

Vintage and alternative clothes stores, music venues, etc

Your temple, church, or other religious institutions

Gay bars, queer cafés, LGBTQ centres, queer bookshops

Doctor’s offices, GUM clinics, and sexual health clinics

Anywhere else you see a noticeboard with events showing!

Also look on flag poles or in windows around your local gay bars or businesses if you have any, generally around the gay village if there’s one to go through.

How do you know the events are good? How do you know they’re legit?

How old does the poster look? Do you see many copies of it around?

Look for dates for the event(s) they’re advertising on the poster, and then look up the venue the events are meant to happen at. Do the dates match? Is it a regular event? Is the event showing on the venue’s website or social media?

Is the event run by a local group, collective, or charity? When you search them, do they have socials or a site of their own? Do they seem active?

If a local queer poster gives you socials, check those socials out — do they have any followers you’re familiar with? Do they post their venues publicly and have defined and public meeting times? Do they seem to have active and engaged commenters? Is there a face or faces behind the social media, or are they anonymous?

If an event is run by anonymous people, or if it seems like they don’t have many followers on social media or very active ones, that might be a bit more suspicious — ditto if an event just gives you a phone number but not any further identifying info.

It’s not inherently suspicious for a queer event to be at an undisclosed location, because of course people do want to ensure some safeguarding and vet people before they come, but if it’s an undisclosed location in combination with anonymous organising, that might be a bit suspicious, and should probably be avoided.

Finding Queer People in Specific Hobby or Other Community Spaces

You don’t have to go to queer-specific events to meet other queer people — any hobby or community you can think of, there’s probably queer people in attendance.

If you’re in a busier or more populous area, say there are 5 events that centre around the same hobby — of those 5, some of them will have more queer people than others, and it might be worth checking them out just to see if you click with anyone there.

My partner and I attend queer-specific board-game evenings that are run out of gay bars or by queer clubs, but pretty much any board-game night is likely to have one or two queer people knocking about, whether they know or would identify themselves as LGBTQ+ off the bat or not.

While there are obviously more open queer people at the queer events, I would say that when we went to a local board-game night run by older straight guys, about a quarter of the attendees were older queer people.

Of my queer friends, pretty much all of them have varied interests and attend different groups or clubs with a lot of other queers knocking about without them being labelled or explicitly queer events — knitting and crocheting, computer coding, electronic music and DJing, fandom, blacksmithing, glassblowing, stand-up comedy, improv, cooking, gardening, board games, cosplay and historical costuming, LEGO, live-action roleplay, tabletop roleplaying games, Magic the Gathering, Yu-Gi-Oh, and other trading card games, poker, burlesque, sports games and clubs, swimming, cycling, fishing, photography, book clubs, bug collecting, birdwatching, weaving, painting, sculpture, pottery, video games, singing, songwriting, poetry…

The list goes on.

Hell, half the people I know seem to go and meet new dates at the local climbing wall, where it seems like all the lesbians and gay guys are crawling all over one another. Another friend of mine attends their local WI, and have met other queer people there.

Other Tips

Remember you can meet people on dating and hook-up apps and that doesn’t necessarily have to be for sex and relationships, whether that’s Grindr, Her, Lex, etc — or you can ask hook-ups and casual dates where they go or if there are local events they think are good or fun. Poly people are particularly useful for this, because they’ll often have a whole network of regular events crossing over and diverging.

If you’re nervous about going to an event alone and you don’t have anybody to go with you, it can be worth checking it out on socials first and see if you have any mutual friends with people that are going — if not, it’s worth heading along anyway, because people might well speak to you before you have to open the conversation with them.

Community groups will often have icebreakers or sessions where people swap names, pronouns, and basic introductions, and that can ease the way into getting used to the space.

If you see somebody else on their own who seems nervous to talk to people, they can be good to approach and say, hey, I also don’t know anyone here, what brings you here? And so on. Remember, other people are pretty much always in the same boat as you.

For me, one of the biggest anxieties about going to new events alone is the fact that I’m disabled and dependent on public transport, and that combo can make it tough on me if I get to a place and it’s inaccessible or just not my speed, and then I have to sort of immediately turn heel and leave, but wait ages for a bus in the meantime. I’ve missed more than one event I was really excited about just because transport didn’t line up for me.

Some considerations to keep in mind when you look for events:

Is the event free or paid? Is this clearly marked? Do you need to buy tickets in advance?

How recent is the posting about the event? Is it posted on a web page or a social media page? Are there recent comments or engagement on the entry? If there is a contact for the event, is it active and responsive?

Is this event regular or recurrent? Is it for a special occasion, and does it have sister events or concurrent events?

Is the event exclusively online, exclusively in-person, or do they change between the two formats? Would you prefer to attend online before you attend in-person?

Do you want to go to a closed and more private group — for example, one that has you message them for the time and location, seems to have capped attendee limits, seems to have a regular community. Or do you want to attend a more casual event in a larger, open space where people might not notice as much as you come and go? Is it going to be very crowded or more spaced out?

Where is the event located, and will you be comfortable in that venue? Is it in a community building such as a charity space, community group, religious institute, school, or university? Is it in a café, restaurant, pub, bar, club, or late-night venue? Is it an explicitly or dedicated queer space? If you are not out to other members of your community, will going into this space reveal that you might be a member of a queer group?

Is the venue age-restricted, and will it require ID? If you must provide ID, will providing your ID in a dead name or in a different gender presentation to your current one be anxiety-inducing or a potential problem for you?

How accessible is the venue to you? Is it walkable, on a regular bus route, or does it have appropriate parking for you? Does it have ramps or elevators? Is it well-ventilated, and does it have a HVAC or other air filtration and purification protocol? Is masking enforced, and/or are masks provided? If you might be watching something together, is there a hearing loop, will there be subtitles on a screening? Is there a first aider at the event? Does the venue serve food or drink, or provide refreshments?

If you are attending alone and have specific needs or requirements, or might need to leave abruptly, is there someone you can let know at the event, such as a first aider or community leader? Are there regular buses, a taxi rank, or online taxi access if you need to quickly head home? Have you let someone else know where you are going, just as a safety concern?

Is the event activity-based, or is it a space where people just sit and talk? Would one or the other of these feel more natural or comfortable to you? Do you have to bring your own activity, such as with a craft or knitting circle, or are supplies provided, such as boardgames or a screening?

Does the group or host for the event(s) have social media? Do they advertise the regular events on socials, or have a newsletter, or some other helpful reminder system?

Most community events will be free, but if it’s an activity group or society, or if it’s a private event, especially one where they buy equipment or supplies, there might be an up-front ticket or access fee, a membership fee or a collection jar or similar — most events will tell you in advance if there is a fee or if they might request a donation.

Most importantly, like… Have fun.

If it sucks, hit the bricks — there’s no obligation to stay anywhere if it’s not fun or doesn’t satisfy you in the way you were hoping.

There’s always other events out there, and you’re very unlikely to truly be the only gay in the village, even if it sometimes feels that way. Good luck!

#musings #queer pride #lgbt #gay community

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zensations35 · 5 months

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I Now Pronounce You Allergic (LSSR)

Yeahhh I FINALLY FINISHED IT!! I'm sorry it took forever but IT'S WORTH IT! Ahem...please enjoy Ren and Sasha's first totally-not-a-date where they BOTH find themselves allergic to the flowers at their friends' wedding--and then proceed to have a holdback challenge. Spice warning, yes there is snzfucking!

Skye helps me put the finishing touches on my makeup. I line my lids with blue and pink and a bold purple.

“Is bi pride appropriate for a lesbian wedding?”

Skye laughs. “Abby won’t care. Kadie,” she trails off, “Who knows with her these days.” Skye clasps hands under her chin and coos. “You look gorgeous.”

Skye helped me pick out a subtly sexy midnight blue dress that I’d been eyeing for weeks but didn’t think I could pull off. It cups my skin so tight it’s like an aura as opposed to a dress.

“How many times have you reassured me about clothes?” Skye’s hand flicks toward my ass--I love the way my ass looks in this dress.

I pair the dress with silver earrings and bracelet. A purple bandana wraps my hair, the bulk of it gathered in a neat bun at the back.

Skye’s face illuminates as she scrolls through her phone. “Ren’s almost here.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“Absolutely. I’m not wanted there--too much history--and! Leo has tickets to Excalion! I’d honestly rather be there.”

“Than your friends’ wedding??”

Skye’s brows rise, “Than an ex’s wedding who can’t stand me? Yes.”

“Fair point.”

Ren picks me up ten minutes later. He’s dressed not unlike he does when he goes to work. Suit, tie, vest, but…is that glitter on his cheek? Skye and I share a look and I see that ‘he’s so adorable’ look on her face.

The venue is big--bigger than I expected from what Ren’s told me about one of the brides. Wide pillars, an archway the size of twelve Rens, marble fucking floors?? Who needs that??

Ren leads me inside and noise surrounds us, people chatting and laughing. I’m swallowed by sound and scents and--

My body turns to iron and I stop walking. Ren startles and looks at me with confusion. But my eyes are fixed on the tables. The tables with bright, purple, bushy…flowers. A very specific flower.

“Ah,” Ren hums as if it makes complete sense. “Yes, I was afraid of this.”

I stare at the offensive flowers. If looks could shank you in a back alley, those flowers would be a crime scene. My lips pinch. The chatter around me numbs to a dull hum. Everything loses focus.

The flowers start to warble and blur behind a saline lens. My sight is compromised. My nose sucks all of the energy out of my other senses. As if it’s putting on a damn light show.

I feel my lip twitch. I hone in on the tickle--the wretched sensation that’s going to ruin this whole experience. My lips form a crescent scrunch and I hear myself growl.

“Ahm…” Ren leans next to me. “Sasha?” he tips his head down to look at me and I jerk to the side. “Are you scrunching your nose?”

“No,” I say, but it comes out all congested and 100% unconvincing.

Ren lifts his brows. “Hm. I see.”

“Hxsh-T!”

His head snaps toward me as I recover and I feel my bones shrink. Fuck. I shoot him a don’t say a word look and he clamps his lips shut. “No. You saw nothing.” I refuse to let this be a thing. Even though, as we head toward our table, I find it overflowing with the atrocious bouquet and--

“Hyk-TSH-iah!” I snuffle and wipe my eyes with my fingers. Ren hands me a cloth napkin and I try not to glare at him as if this is his fault.

We’re seated at a four-person table and across from us are two other people. One of them is a very tall, very burly woman who could be on the cover of a weight lifting magazine. Her slinky copper hair is fluffed at the top and pulled into an amalgamation of a ponytail-slash-braid. I can’t imagine an actual salon doing that to her, so it was probably a homemade hair concoction.

The man she’s seated next to is…significantly smaller. Like, he looks so thin, I’m pretty sure a medium-sized breeze would knock him over. His wrists are bony and I think I see a purple bruise in the crook of his elbow. He also has a cloud of red curls and a matching spray of freckles dotting his face like the woman does.

I feel my nose threatening to misbehave again and I instinctively look for the champagne. There’s a glass in front of me next to a sheet of paper for each table setting. I inspect it closer and my stomach flips.

It’s a bingo sheet. There are things like ‘brides kiss without prompt’, ‘Anne talks about her beanie babies’, and--

“Ren sneezes during the best man speech?” the burly woman blurts in a thick drawl. A throaty cackle burst from her, not unlike that of a hyena. “Do you see this, Ikka?” she prods at the text, nudging the man next to her.

“Please, Iris,” His voice is rich and dull at the same time, accent a strange twang, as if he spent time in the UK and Texas, but not enough to fully form either accent.

“It’s just funny, right?” her cheeks dimple with a grin. Her voice is raw and boisterous as if she really is finding everything hilarious.

My eyes fall back onto the phrase: Ren sneezes during the best man speech. It’s right up top. What..the…heck, vanillas?

As if on cue, I hear the raspy intake of air right next to me. And the table jolts as Ren’s knees knock into it at the same time he jerks into a rigid, “HxSZg!”

I flush and can’t help my eyes rounding. Oh gods…him too??

He flashes me a sheepish look and rakes a finger against his nose. “I think we will get at least one point.”

I snort, “You did not…”

Another keening cackle from the lady across the table. “Oh shit, Ikka! That’s him,” she gyrates her wrist toward Ren. She props her chin on her upturned palm. “Tell me, Ren,” she says with a mixture of mischief and amusement, “Do you sneeze a lot?”

The man next to her groans and rolls his eyes. “I am so sorry,” he says to Ren. “She thinks she’s hilarious.”

“Well, I am, ain’t I?”

“Ren!” a floaty voice perks us all up and I see one of the brides hurrying toward us. Her brown hair is braided in a ring around her face and her cheeks are sunny and dimpled.

“Abigail,” Ren stands and lets her scrunch him with a hug. She pulls back and takes his hands, brimming with joy. “I’m so glad you made it! Gosh! I was worried people wouldn’t come because there’s no ceremony but--Ah! Is that your…date?” her eyes flick to me.

Ren gestures to me, “This is Sasha--Skye’s girlfriend. She is indeed in attendance with me.”

Abigail’s lips form a ring, “Oh, I see. Yeah, I’m so sorry about Skye, but,” she laughs awkwardly, “you know how Kadie is.” A knowing eye roll as her pink lips pucker.

Ren pats her hand, still attached to the V of his suit. “All is well. Skye is with our boyfriend Leo, seeing a concert.”

Abigail laughs uneasily. “Oh, well, good.” Her gaze warms. “I hope you have a good speech prepared. Kadie thinks you could get AI to write it and it would sound exactly like you.”

“I assure you, I did no such thing.”

My face is so tingly right now and I wish Abby would just leave so I can escape to the--

“SS-Ktsh!” I immediately shudder, arms wrapping around my midsection as I tuck my chin into my collar. Oh if I thought one was going to be enough--”Hit’SHKkk!” I was a fool. “Hax-SHIEU!”

“Oh,” Abigail trails fingers over her chest. “Are you okay?”

I nod, eyes still squeezed shut, free hand roaming the table for the--

Cloth presses into my palm and I feel the brush of Ren’s fingers. “She is well, I assure you. We seem to be experiencing similar issues with,” he gestures to the bouquets.

“Oh my gosh--I’m so sorry!” Abby coos. “Seriously, Kadie insisted, even though I said you were allergic. She was like, ‘he can just take a benadryl’ and I was--”

“It is quite alright, Abby. We are fine.”

“Are you sure? Because I think my grandma has Claritin?”

I perk up, “C or D?”

“Uhh, I’m not sure but you could go ask her,” Abigail points to an elderly woman seated next to the bar, with an oxygen tank next to her.

“Uhhh, maybe,” I lie. I’m definitely not sneezing enough to beg an old woman for allergy pills. It’d be just my luck to get her talking about her own allergy journey. I swear anyone over 60 loves to talk about the pollen count. Ydjjjehhhh...my teeth chatter involuntarily.

“Well, just let us know if you need anything!” Abby trills and floats away waving her fingers as if she’s boarding a plane.

I use the cloth to wipe my eyes again and blow out a frustrated breath.

“Sasha…”

I tip my eyes to Ren who looks nothing but concerned.

“Are you uncomfortable?”

I sniff, shunting my gaze.

“Please, be truthful.”

I puff. “Yeah, I am.”

“Then we shall leave.”

My shoulders lock. “What! No! These people are your friends! You’re the best man!”

Ren leans down, leveling his liquid blue eyes with mine.

“Sasha, out of everyone here, you are my priority.”

I flush, my heart thrumming through my chest and neck.

“Are you able to handle it?”

I twist the cloth between my fingers, “I don’t know.”

Ren leans over the table, facing to the side so all I see is the apex of his jaw. But he does that single-knuckle rub motion that always always leads to--

*snf* “Hh…”

I slam my eyes shut and do my best to think of banjo music.

“Hg-gk…hh-hih!”

And…he stops. His parted lips close. He exhales. Sniffles. Looks at his phone and scrolls like nothing happened.

I gape at him, my stomach flipping with butterflies. “Seriously?” I snap loud enough for the other table to turn their heads.

Ren looks at me, flabbergasted. “Was that wrong?”

“Yes!”

“So, I should have just…let it happen?”

“No!”

“Then…” Ren lifts his hands in a shrugging motion. I groan, burying my face in my hands, using it as an excuse to rub my own itchy nose with my palms.

“Hmm…” Ren taps a pen on a piece of paper. He spins it around and scribbles on it.

Ren 1 Sasha 5

I peer at it, then him, eyes lidded with suspicion. “What the hell is this?”

“A game.”

“A game?”

Ren leans back, “Whoever sneezes the most loses.”

My brows shoot up. “Are you joking?”

“Not particularly.”

I drop back down to the paper. I feel a buzzing in my limbs, as if I’m preparing for a marathon. It feels…exciting? Oh fuck it. My lips tick up and energy rushes through me.

“You’re on, Grayson.”

He smirks.

Ren eyes my champagne glass and points a slender finger. “Do you need another?”

I frown at him, “Will you be okay if I…”

Ren softens. “I will be fine, Sasha. I have been sober for a while now. I am capable of restraint.”

I nod, “Then sure. But grab some strawberries too. And apples! And maybe…”

Snickers from across the table. I look over to see the fitness model laughing. She sees me looking and smiles, wide and warm. “Y’all are so cute!”

I blush and turn to Ren but he’s already standing to leave for the food table.

“Um,” I wrinkle my napkin and clear my throat, “So, how do you know the brides?”

She continues to smile, “I don’t.”

I pause, waiting but she doesn’t continue.

“Alright, then your date does?”

She bursts into snorts of laughter, wide hands cupping her angular mouth, “Ikka,” she uses her elbow to nudge him and I hear him let out a tiny whine, “she thinks you’re my date.”

His lips crimp in amusement. “So did that other woman--the elderly one.”

My head spins like I’m being exorcized, “Wh-where?”

“The lady,” he points to a plump graying woman currently a table away, scolding people there for something. Her hair is a curly swoop over her brow and I see at least four crosses on her ears and necklace.

“Maybe we should play along,” the man, Ikka, says. “I don’t want to explain how we’re related.”

“We don’t have to go into detail, just tell her we’re half siblings.”

He drains his glass and rolls his eyes, “So she can ask why? No thanks.”

My ears prickle when I hear the so obvious sound my brain is fucking attuned for: hitching breaths. My eyes trail the room, searching, but I hear it before I see anything.

“HkXGn! H-Gk’dsz!”

It’s quiet, so miniscule I’m sure there are people at the buffet who didn’t even hear it. But I did.

When Ren arrives and deposits the drink and plate, my lips quirk up, “Two points for you.”

He looks alarmed, “You heard those?”

A laugh bubbles in my throat, “I could hear them from another room, Lawrence.”

I hear the braying laugh as the burly woman claps her hands together. “I think Kadie did the seating, Kah!”

“Iris, don’t fucking start--”

My left eye twitches. Apparently there’s wedding drama here that I want nothing to do with. I decide right then: I’m sticking to a small ceremony if I get married.

Ren passes me a plate of fruits, “I was not certain if you wanted red or blackberries, so I took both.”

Iris’s pitched voice calls, “Why do you talk like that?” She’s looking at Ren and my heart sinks.

Ren’s cheeks harden, lines appearing on his forehead. A flare of familiar anger sparks in his eyes as his voice sharpens. “I speak this way so I do not speak,” his chin tips at her, “that way.”

My hand flies out to smack his, “Ren! That was extremely rude!”

He buries his lips in his teeth, eyes shiny from chagrin. He sighs, brushing a thumb across his glass, leaving a scar of condensation behind, “I apologize,” he says to the woman.

To her credit, she just shrugs and resumes talking to her…brother? But I’m indignant for her. I glare at Ren and frown. “Ren, I get that you have trauma about your accent, but not everyone felt the need to change theirs. Don’t be a jerk.”

Ren nods, “Yes. You are absolutely correct.”

I nod and feel better. I was hoping that wouldn’t turn into an argument. I eat some of my strawberries and the sugar rush makes me kind of giddy. Until I forget where I am and take too big of a breath through my nose.

My synapses light up and I taste panic hot on my tongue. I’m already tearing up, moisture running down my cheeks. My makeup I worked so hard on is smudging. Fuck. I fumble in my purse for clean tissues but I come up empty. What the hell? I always bring a pack everywhere. Whatever. Lost cause.

I squeeze my fingers around my necklace to stop it from flopping but, “Hih-XSShh-ieh!” the sneeze rocks my neck, my shoulders. My chin yanks and my hand snaps the metal, the silver chain pooling around my wrist like a liquid snake.

“Fuck!” I snarl but I’m not done, “Adj’SK!!” I sneeze viciously into the hand holding the chain, feeling the tang of iron on my lips. This can not get any worse.

I throw myself to my feet, fingers steepled over my nose. Tears blur my vision as hitches flutter against my tongue, “Hhh-ieh! IEH!” My feet fly over the ground, carrying me so fast I stumble. At the same time I’m careening toward the ground, my lips sputter, “Hiex-SHIEEw- UGH!”

Strong hands wrap around my shoulders and pull me straight up to a standing position so that I’m no longer about to flatten my nose on the tile. I blink away allergic tears as Iris beams at me. She doesn’t seem put off by my splotched, wet face at all.

“You okay, sweetie?”

I mutter something unintelligible and then cough. “Uhm, kh, yes. I-I’m good. Thank you.”

“No problem, doll. Can I escort you to the bathroom?”

“Oh, no I can get there fine.”

“I’m on the way myself, but I’ll wait if you need privacy.”

My wrists wag left and right, “Oh, no it’s fine!” My people pleasing ass overrides the need to be alone. “We can both go.”

I let Iris lead the way into the restroom where she takes a stall and I use the mirror to clean up. When she comes out of the stall I'm blowing my nose and apologizing every time I sniffle.

“Ikka gets sick a lot--snot don’t bother me,” she says as she washes her hands.

I titter with her but there’s no way I can explain my special brand of embarrassment. So I take some soft purple tissues and blow my nose. But just when I get it clear, the fire reignites, sending me spilling back into the fluff.

“Ha-XSSH! Iee’TSHH-ieu! EiSHH!” I snort thickly, “Agh, whad the fugk?”

Iris rorars a laugh and swipes the napkins, “Yall must be allergic to lavender.”

“Uh,” I sniffle, “Yeah. W--” I point at the cloth, “Are those…”

“Lavender scented,” her eyes shimmer with amusement and I flame bright. “Man,” she chuckles, stuffing the soggy tissues in the trash hole, “They really had it out for you two didn’t they?”

I groan and flick on the faucet. “Seems so.”

“I can ask Ikka for unscented ones. He usually has some.”

I shake my head, “No-no, that’s okay, I…” I scrunch my nose and clamp my hands over my face. “I just need…a minute….”

Iris pops a shoulder, “Alright. Well, good luck.” She swaggers out of the bathroom, leaving me to my mess. I clean up as best I can and fix my makeup, spraying a setting liquid over it once I’m done.

It’s been quite a while and I turn to head back, but the drinks swirl in my head and I pause. My eyes land on the stack of lavender tissues.

I don’t think too hard about it, but I find myself stuffing a few into my purse before fleeing the scene.

When I get out of the restroom, I hear people calling “Toast! Toast!” and I see Ren standing up with a flute of sparkling water.

I risk a glance at him staring smugly at me as he crosses the room, a cocky grin on his face.. He lifts a finger in the air and tapped the side of his nose before holding up 4 fingers.

Oh. It’s fucking on.

I hurry to pass Ren him on my way to the table, digging in my bag.

“You’ll need these,” I don't meet his eyes as I stuff the tissues in his hand. I scurry away, shame leaving a hot trail behind me. I don't know why I did that--why did I do that?? I’m a godsdammed cheater, that’s why.

I sit and watch as innocently as i possibly can. Ren stands iron straight at the front of the room, but his expression is soft, eyes twinkling in the chandelier lights. He addresses everyone and gestures to the brides on either side of him.

“I met Kadie in college. We were good friends. She was always keeping me in line.”

A knowing chuckle hums across the room. An inside joke. Ren holds his arm toward, “Abigail let me crash on her couch for most of my young adult life.”

“Me and Leo,” she quips.

“Touche”. Ren lowers his voice for dramatic effect. “She had to kick me out quite often once she met Kadie.”

A ruckus of laughter at that. Abigail blushes but Kadie takes her hand, amused. Ren knows what he’s doing. Playing the crowd. Like a good DM. He begins the next phase of his speech but I can hear the hints of congestion stirring his words into a thicker drawl.

A few people have their bingo cards ready. I’d be lying if I wasn’t thinking about it. Ren pauses mid-word, breath ragged, fumbling in his pocket.

“Apologies,” he croaks, “It s-hhh…seems you shall--snf! Have a bingo point af--” he folds one of the tissues over his nose, “Hk’TZZHHH!”

“Ikka,” the woman at our table rasps, “Quit staring and mark it down!”

My brain pushes their convo aside. I watch Ren’s nose, his chin. Bobbing up and down with each hitch, inhale, sigh. Eyes lock onto him as if his hypnotic buildup has charmed the snakes of the show.

“Hnng…” the silence in the room is as solid as a truck. I can’t speak for anyone beyond my line of sight but my entire table is watching him intently. Seriously, why are they watching so hard? Do vanillas just--

“Wait,” Iris points from me to the bathroom tissues. “Did you--”

I slam back my glass of champagne, ignoring the question.

“XsST-hieu!! EGSX-EIU!” Ren siffles thickly and dabs his nose but that’s only making it worse.

Seven.

I lift up, ready to fly to his defense, but Ren crumples the tissue with a sorrowful sniffle and tucks the pack into his breast pocket to finish the speech.

“My apologies. Or, perhaps not?” Ren draws another laugh from the crowd.

Iris smacks the bingo sheet, “Focus, Icabod! We’re close to winning!”

Okay. I’m getting kind of sus here. Maybe I’m just in fet brain overdrive but I have to know. Ren finishes his speech and ambles toward us, flicking tears from his watery eyes and slumps into the chair with a groaning sigh.

“Ren,” I rasp when I’m safely close enough to him to prevent being heard from the others. “Hey!” I wrap my fingers around his tie and pull his neck down so I can speak with him. And wow this actually is hot. No wonder Skye does it so much. I wobble a little and ohhh gods I'm getting drunk.

I release him once he’s nice and close and whisper, “Rub your nose.”

He jerks back, “What?!”

I groan, rolling my head, “Not like that. It’s…it’s for science.”

Ren follows my gaze to Icabod and he hums, “Ah.” He tips his head down and sniffles. He brushes the underside of his nose, slow and deliberate. His eyes flutter and he lets out an exaggerated gasp.

“Igh!! Hiiegh…”

I stare open mouthed for way too long. Christ he’s good at this. I’m about to just let him attempt a fake before I remember there was a point to this.

I sneak a look at Icabod and… our expressions could have matched 100%. He might even be drooling. Not that I blame him. Rens still going, toying around with teasing hitches and soft gasps. Gods what must that be like in bed?

WHAT? I have clearly had too much champagne.

I sneak another look at Icabod to see him staring intently at his fork. And his eyes flick toward Ren. And back to the fork.

I am floored. The odds are insane. But I do know those two are friends of Skye. Or aquaintances. Maybe I’m not the only person she’s met online…

Two claps bring our attention to the floor and Ren stops his fake buildup in milliseconds with a soft breath and a quick nose swipe. The man should be an actor.

“Alright everyone, we’re having a freeze dance competition. Now, pick your partners, and dance! When we blow the whistle, you’re gonna freeze! Don’t. Move. Any movement, intentional or not, will disqualify you for the prize.”

“What’s the prize?” I ask.

Ren glides up next to me, knuckling his nose, “I do not think it will matter.”

I open my mouth to ask him why, but that’s a dumb question. His watery eyes and the buzzing of my own nostrils I’m desperately trying to ignore would destroy us both.

“Maybe it’s for the best we sit out. I can’t even dance.”

Ren looks astounded. “You cannot dance?”

“I…no. Not like…ballroom dancing.”

“Then,” he holds out a hand, “I shall teach you.”

I pause. Dancing is Skye and Ren’s thing. I feel like this would be an intrusion of their sacred custom. But Ren waggles his fingers as if groping for my hand. “Skye will not mind.”

How does he read me like that?

He takes me by the hand and pulls me immediately into a spin. I’ve seen him and Skye do this enough that I don’t stumble. I may not have participated before, but I’m far from a dance virgin.

We dance the intro of the song for a couple minutes, and I can’t keep the smile off my face. I feel so dashing in my sexy dress, tearing up the floor like this.

Ren cradles my back, hands strong and gentle as he dips me low. My head tilts back and I’m overwhelmed by the scratchy scent of lavender. A busboy passes by carrying another bouquet. I jacknife upright, palm flattening my lips and nose as two very not stealthy sneezes wrench my spine, “Hiex-SHEW! HAAh-TSHHieu!”

Ren lifts me and swirls us, dancing uninterrupted. I gulp air and glower, “That was cheating!”

“It is not cheating. I am within the boundaries of the rules we set.”

“We didn’t set any rules!”

Ren smirks knowingly. I honestly have no room to complain though. I cheated first.

“Freeze!” the voice rocks adrenaline into my veins and we both instinctively still. Ren’s hands are on the small of my back and propped on my hip; my arms are draped over his shoulders, one palm spread behind his neck.

It feels so intimate. And…I swallow, my body reacting to him already.

It’s about to get much more intimate.

His face is flushed so pink I’d think he was drunk. His teeth grind and he snarls a hitch. “Sasha,” his breath is hot and moist, barely audible but bold enough to send wracking shivers down my spine. “I am not…going to last…”

Oh gods. He did not just say that.

Abigail moves toward us. Fuck fuck! What are we going to do? Ren’s nose scrunching isn’t doing the trick, and if he sneezes on me, I’m going to lose my goddamn mind.

His fingers tighten on my waist as he sucks in a breath, and I make a decision. My hand sweeps from his neck across his cheek, his skin hot as a brand, and my fingers close over his firm nostrils.

He exhales, relief shuddering through him, and I swear I absorb that shudder and feel it quaking my thighs.

I’m. Grabbing. Ren’s. Nose. I’m grabbing Ren’s nose! In public! What the fuck am I thinking??

I could tell myself that I just want to win--that’s all this is. But I’ve been lying to myself for too long. I don’t give a flying fuck if we win this game. I wanted to touch him. To feel his nostrils twitch under my grip, his breath bathe my wrist--oh gods. My body is a livewire. I’m worried I’m going to vibrate myself off the dance floor.

“Sasha,” he grunts, “you may release me.”

Electricity zings through my arm and I snatch my hand away as if burned.

Ren’s eyes glitter and his mouth curves, “That rather turned you on.”

“And I think that rather turns you on.” My bold comment comes out of nowhere.

The corner of his lip ticks up, “Of course.”

I didn’t think I could burn hotter but my blood feels ten times heavier.

Asshole. Is he just picking at me like friendly banter…or does he…want me?

This isn’t the first time we’ve flirted with each other. Over the course of all our friendships, the on-off-on-off of all fucking four of us…it’s godsdamn exhausting. And it’s wearing me down--physically and emotionally.

Ren looks at me with those concerned furrowed brows. I want him to say the same thing. The same thing I’m thinking, feeling. I…I want…

A clap brings us out of the sexual deviancy of the moment and Abigail calls, “That’s a wrap!”

Abby glides toward us and squees. “You two were precious!” she trills.

“Did we--”

“You didn't win,” she frowns.

“Erm, no, I know. But,” I fidget, coiling and uncoiling my fingers. “Did we embarrass ourselves?”

Abby chuckles. “Not at all. The other competitors were thrilled--” Abby poked Ren’s nose affectionately making his nostrils flare a bright pink. Why did that make me jealous?

Ren steps forward, leading Abby as she chats about ….

“Please just do this one thing for me, please!”

“W-what thing?”

“The entire guest list has been taking photo booth pics so we can scrapbook it all vintage like. Will yall participate?” Abby begs.

Ren’s lips twist. “Alright. Of course. For you.”

With a squeal from Abby, we are ushered into a long hall, wider than average. It’s filled with nostalgic photos of celebrities like Elvis, The Beatles…is that Shirley Temple?? Did they even have photo booths back then? Oh gods, this whole fucking hallway is a beacon for how bad I am at history.

In a misshapen nook sits a photo booth. A fancy one--it has a door and everything. Wow. Kadie went all out with this reception. I’m assuming she wanted to wow her guests to make up for having to univite them to the actual ceremony in 2020.

With some nudging, Abigail watches us climb in and shoots me a thumbs up. “I gotta go kiss ass to my mother in law but it’s pretty self explanatory. Take some funny ones! I’m making a scrapbook!”

Ren is already inside and when I climb in, I find it more spacious than I expected, but not enough for us to sit side-by-side. I may have a smaller waist, but Ren has bulk in his thighs and shoulders that just won’t work.

“Well,” I say, “I guess I’ll sit on your leg, if that’s ok.”

Ren nods and shifts so I can perch near his knee, pulling my dress down in a habitual need to unbunch my clothes. I slide over his leg and catch myself when his fingers curl around my hips to steady me.

“Is this alright?”

“Yeah, thanks,” I resume shifting. We look at the screen in front of us and I squint, searching for the switch to activate it. “Where…” we start fussing around, both seeking the mechanism but coming up empty.

I groan, “Why is something so vintage so hard for us to figure out?” I feel the edge of anger on my tongue, “It’s so different from every phone booth I’ve used.”

“As opposed to the many phone booths you’ve been in?”

“I was young once, Ren. In the 90s. So, yes.”

“Hm,” he chuckles. “Were they…” the word drops, thickening with dull congestion that makes my spine straighten like a steel rod. I jerk to the side, putting the shadows of his jawline in my peripheral.

“Are you…” I swallow a desert in my mouth.

He rubs a lip under his teeth, “Would it be better for me to say yes, or no?”

“What does that mean?”

“It m-means…” his words begin to stumble, “If denying I am not hhh--” his long fingers climb to his face, sawing languidly under his nose.

“Worse.”

“Then, my nose itches and I hhh--believe I might--hh-igh…sneeze.”

I flush hot and oh, I was wrong. That phrase was so much worse. Better. Augh I am absolutely incapable of untangling the mess of emotions flooding me like a rainstorm. I feel myself squirm, the photo switch forgotten in lieu of, “Ren…”

I feel his hand on my hip tightening--exactly the same way it did on the dance floor. Oh gods…if there was any doubt, it’s gone: flung out the window.

He’s going to sneeze. I’m on his lap. Fuuuuuck.

“Ren,” I feel my throat grate against his name, “I should go, I--”

“I will be fine,” he sniffles and his head does a small shake that makes my spine melt. His voice is honey, “It’ll pass.”

A contraction. He’s really fucking trying.

“Uhh, I don’t think it will,” I say flatly.

“I can…handle it. Trust me.”

“Trust me,” I wiggle to stand but my knees tangle and I end up slipping back, falling into him. His hands wind around my middle, one thumb skimming the slit decorating my hip.

“Ah-apologies, I--”

I should try to get up again. I know I should. But his grip is firm, steady, as if I’m his anchor in a storm. I hear him sniffle right in my ear and gods I shiver from head to toe. It makes my shoulders wring, my stomach thrum, and my thighs…

I hear him gasp and feel his hips rock forward. He lets out a small moan and I realize I’ve squirmed myself to the ridges of his lap. And Oh. Fuck, this fabric must be so thin because I can feel exactly how my arousal is affecting him.

“Hh-ieh--” He squeezes my body so hard a small gasp flees my throat.

“Mmmmhh--!” there is no way the sounds I’m making are even remotely adjacent to ‘stop doing that please’. My body is in camp sneeze right now.

“Hhh-ngh, Sahh…” His breaths come in grinding gasps and I’m not sure anymore if it’s from holding back the sneeze or my ass rubbing against his cock.

I’m too hot for this. I’m too horny for this. The unbelievable tension and teasing of the night all crashes into me in frantic, thought-erasing need.

I can’t remember why this is a bad idea. I can’t remember that we’re in a public fucking place, in the middle of a wedding reception and it’s Not A Good Time. My panties are slick and wet, and I do more than wiggle--I writhe. Noises escape me in high pitches half breaths, matching his liquid gasps escaping his tilted mouth.

“Hhh-iehh--HEh!”

I could stop this. I could get up. I could launch myself out of this photo booth as if I were a champagne cork and Ren wouldn’t stop me. But I don’t want to stop.

My back arches when I feel his head dip far enough for his nose to feather the skin of my neck. Oh fuck ohfuckohfuck-- My senses narrow to that spot, everything dulling around me as his lips pop apart, still buried in my neck, and--

“HGX-SHHZ!”

Pleasure explodes inside of me. My body bucks and I ride him, rubbing myself back and forth over his trapped cock in a rocking motion.

“Hieh--”

“Oh fucking gods!”

“HY-ESHHUUU!”

My orgasm unleashes, wracking my body, lighting every nerve inside me, pulling closed-lipped moans from my throat. “Mmmnn-gods fuck MMMNnnn!” My hands are clawing and scrunching any fabric they can get at--from the folds of my dress to Ren’s taut pants. He moans against me and I hear him swear, “F--uck…”

My body collapses against him and I suck in air, my chest pulsing in time with my labia. He’s still hard against me, fingers delicate but firm as he sniffles thick and wet.

“S-Sasha,” he grunts, “I…”

“Oh my gods.” My heartbeat turns from pounding to racing.

We just dry humped in a wedding photo booth!

My hands slap my face. “What the fuck am I doing?” Gods, I must be so--

“Sasha,” Ren’s hand squeezes my shoulder. “If you permit me to leave first--”

“No,” I say quickly, tugging my bra strap back in place and smoothing my wrinkled bandana. “Anyone who overheard just heard me m-moaning and…you, uhh…”

“Sneezing?”

“Y-yeah. But that could have been me, and…”

Ren concedes, though he doesn’t look convinced. “As you wish.”

I don’t need him to believe me, I just need to get out of here. Now.

Hoping my makeup made it out unscathed, I crawl out, opening the door--thank gods there’s a door--and sliding out, eyes darting around to see if anyone is nearby.

“Hey there.”

I freeze, my entire body jolting with panicked adrenaline. I turn to see Kadie staring at me, arms folded over her wide bosom, lips askew. Sparks in her sage eyes.

I flap my hands nervously, “I was just--”

“I know what you were doing.” Her voice is firm but there’s a hint of a roguish gleam.

My blood ices. “No, you don’t understand.”

She silences me with an upturned palm. “You do know I dated Skye, right?”

My jaw unhinges. Of course. Of fucking course she knows. She could probably see it all over my face all godsdamn day.

My hands close over my face, “Oh my fuck,” I muffle.

Kadie sighs, a heaving breath, “Look, I really don’t give two shits what you did in there. But I’d better not have to clean anything up.” At my alarm, she pressed the air with her hand, “Chill. No one else knows, or heard you. Just me.” She hands me a slim rectangle of paper. “Maybe watch the switch next time. You’re lucky I was here.”

She whirls and leaves me clutching three stacked images--muted and gray but there’s no doubting what’s going on in there. If I focus, I can see my O-face. IeeHHGGG.

I crumple the pictures as Ren climbs out, brushing wrinkles from his suit. “What happened?” he asks.

I look at him, “Kadie heard us. And…saw…” I crunch the photos again for good measure.

“I see.” Ren rakes a forked hand through his hair and it flops back over his brow with enviable ease. “Perhaps then, it is an opportune time to--”

“Bail?” I snort, “Sorry, I shouldn’t…”

“Yes. Bail.”

My chin juts up at him in confusion.

We make it out without being noticed. Ren even finds us a bathroom on the other end of the building to freshen up. I make sure to slather myself in deodorant. Everywhere. Yes, even my stomach and thighs. My underwear didn’t make it out unscathed. I pull my track pants out of my bag and go commando.

I have a tube top as well and I trade it for the dress. Now I look like I’m about to go to yoga but at least I don’t look like I just snzfucked a guy in a photo booth.

In the hall, Ren is still wearing his suit. “You didn’t bring extra clothes?”

He pats his vest in various places as if to say and where would I put them?

I roll my eyes. “Whatever. I’m ready to get--HXST-Ieh! Out of here.” I grind my palm over my nose, furious it hasn’t finished with me yet.

Ren opens his palm and offers it to me. “As you wish. However, I have one more stop to make.”

We hurry toward the exit, not encountering any obstacles before we burst out into the windy air like a prison break. Ren and I lock eyes and let out twin snorts.

“I’m impressed you kept your erection during that whole fit,” I giggle.

“Years with Skye has tempered me. At this point I find myself sporting a partial even when I start to…”

Oh fuck that’s hot.

I drink in the crisp air, hoping it’ll cool me off. I breathe deep and we head toward the car.

We’re still sniffly on the drive. Allergy aftermath can last hours if you marinate long enough. Ren drives us to a strip center just downtown. He parks at a meter right outside, “A book store?” I drink in the cottagecore awning and the chalkboard sign announcing an author signing.

An author I know.

Anita Maez?!

Ren looks at me, smiling. Not smirking. Not grinning. Just…smiling.

“Your ticket is anonymous,” he says, “If you do not wish to enter, no one will know you withdrew.”

My eyes are wide and I feel my heart set up camp in my throat. “Ren…” I swallow through the thickness. He remembered my favorite fucking author and made a point to buy me a ticket to meet her??

He hands me the ticket and I take it, unable to tear my eyes away from it. I virtually stumble toward the building, only pausing to look at Ren to make sure he’s really okay with this. He nods and waits outside to give me privacy.

In line, I can’t stop thinking about Ren. The lengths he went for me today. For me. My brain is a bonfire. It’s becoming very hard to not look for meaning in tonight. Ren, making up a game for us so I don’t freak out sneezing in public. Making sure I was comfortable the whole time with all of the weird conversations. How utterly safe I felt in that booth with him. I’ve only felt that safe with Skye and Leo.

And now this.

Is he doing these things for me because we’re friends? Or is this just Ren being…Ren? I realize I don’t know, really. I know him as a friend. As Skye’s lover. As Leo’s primary. But I can’t tell if he wants us to be closer or if he just does this kind of thing.

I send a quick text to Skye, but then it’s my turn for the meet and greet, and I shove all those thoughts aside to meet my hero.

Ren isn’t outside the shop when I exit but I peg his location instantly. He’s down the sidewalk near a corner, sneezing his head off.

I start counting, unable to help myself from lining my footsteps with each sneeze. He stops, finally, and sniffles, patting his nostrils with a purple tissue--oh. Those tissues.

I rush over and snatch it from him, earning me a bewildered look between sniffles. “What--”

“Those are lavender scented,” I flush at his expression. “They’re…causing more problems than solving.”

Ren chuckles and shakes his head. “Well, that does explain quite a lot.”

I pop my hip and place a hand on it, “So, what are we at?” I tease. “After your whole,” I fan my fingers around his face.

“Mmm. Seven. But as we are not specifically at the venue, they do not count.”

“Um, they absolutely count, Grayson. We didn’t set any rules, remember?”

He has the gall to look defeated right before he tips his head in a bow. “Very well. The final count is?”

“Me with 13, you with,” I grin smarmily, “16.”

“Hm,” he hums. “Would it be a stretch to say your author signing is your prize?”

“Fuck no. First, you had that planned before the game started. Second, I didn’t ask for it, third…” I stop ticking my fingers when I see the mischievous look on his face. The streetlamps have caught his eyes so they look like they’re dancing. And he’s somehow maneuvered his arm above his head, propping himself into one of those ‘hot boy’ movie leans the lead love interest always does.

I bite back a snort. Is he flirting? Is he doing the sexy man pose on purpose?

“What, Sasha, would you like your prize to be?”

I want to laugh and cry and tell him he looks silly and obvious. That he’s not as sexy as he thinks he is. Even if it’s a godsdamn lie. He would have won if I hadn’t counted what happened outside here--another result of my cheating our game. And he still let me pick the prize.

And what do I even want?

You.

The thought comes unbidden. Immediate. I want him. I want him the same way I want Skye and Leo. I want to throw our dynamic into the trash and just…be together. All of us. A true collective polycule.

I can’t tell if he heard me, but it’s obvious he knows what I’m thinking. My throat bobs. Fear grips my heart tight. What if what if what if-

Ren is closing the distance between us and I can feel the pull of his heat. My body is like a magnet, my thighs ablaze trying not to just crush him with my--

Down girl. You already went on that ride.

He’s over me now, his lips bowed and crimped.

“What,” he rasps, the heat of his tone melting my resolve, “would you like, Sasha?”

Fuck it. Fuck all of it. I grab his tie and pull his face down toward me. His upper body jerks forward and he careens down--gods, no wonder Skye does this so much--and I kiss him. His lips are soft and strong and completely devastating me.

It doesn’t matter that I’ve technically kissed him before. This is our first kiss. An earth-shattering, lava-forming, creating new continents kiss.

He lets me lead him, his tongue flicking my lower lip, asking permission, and I invite him in.

Vaguely aware of his hand on my waist, fingers wrapping and scrunching my shirt.

He lets out a small moan into my throat and all rational thought vanishes.

Fuck. I love him. I love them all. Skye, Leo, Ren. And it hardens my bones, softens my heart, steels my mind.

This is how it was meant to be.

160 miles away

Backstage, the music is muffled. Skye and Leo are standing awkwardly, Skye shifting from left to right, eyes wide and focused on the yellowing floor beneath them.

Leo’s lips drop and his heart pounds. “Are you…okay?”

Skye gives a half hearted nod as she pulls out her phone and reads the screen, illuminating the pink of her cheeks.

Leo looks up, toward the flashing lights ahead where the roar of the crowd coats the night. “I hope Ren and Sasha are having more fun than we are.”

Another nod, Skye’s chin jerking down. Leo hears a small hiccup disguised as a sigh. She pockets her phone and looks at him, something lighting her eyes in a way that makes him uneasy.

“You ready for this?” she asks.

Someone screams ahead and both of their heads whip toward it. Skye’s hand closes around Leo’s, squeezing.

“I think that’s our cue.”

To be continued…

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genderqueerdykes · 11 months

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I'll preface this with saying that if you don't feel like dealing with this topic then feel free to delete the ask.

So I have a question regarding the "kink at Pride" debate. Isn't the most viable solution just having two events; i.e. one venue hosts an "all-ages" type and another separate one where everything is allowed?

I ask this because I recognize the contributions that people with kinks have made and I don't agree with the exclusionist mindset, but I'm one of those people who does have trauma surrounding kink. I hate feeling excluded because of that (after all, I'm queer and I've struggled just as much as the next queer person) and I want people like me to be able to participate just as much as those who helped make history. There are those who are able to reconcile their trauma, but many of us can't.

I'm sorry if this is a stupid question. People on both sides tend to be very hostile regarding this subject... and that said I genuinely do understand the anger felt on the side of people with kinks since the talking point "kink doesn't belong at Pride at all" is an ahistorical and TERF based mindset. I just wished that the discussion around this topic was less toxic because I don't want to be exclusive to others nor be excluded myself, and unless I'm missing something it seems like the solution that would be beneficial for everyone is having those two spaces that accommodate both camps (if it is a common thing then that's good, but I've been to several areas and every event was only ever the mixed bag for lack of a better term).

hello there, i think my best answer for this question is this

it's totally okay to want to have all ages events and sections and aspects to pride parades and pride events- in my city pride lasts for an entire week and there are events specifically for kids, and elderly queer folks as well. often times during pride month there will be all kinds of celebrations and i think it's a good idea to have multiple kinds of celebrations

however, you really cannot remove the adult aspects from pride parades and other big main event pride festivals- there is free AIDS testing at a lot of pride fests, free condoms and dental dams, sexual education, other sex harm reduction education and resources, sex toy shops, info on safe gay/trans sex, information on safe kink practices, etc. removing those aspects of pride could be downright dangerous for some who rely on this type of harm reduction

i understand that you have trauma and that you want to express boundaries, that is good- if witnessing kink upsets or triggers you, it's okay to want to avoid it, but pride is going to have displays like that because it is in fact a protest. it is not family friendly, it never has been and it never will be- it spawned in response to police brutality that was happening within queer bars. it is designed to shock you and make you think.

pride is an event that has historically been kinky and included a lot of people proudly displaying that they live alternative lifestyles because they are heavily important to a lot of queers. the san fransisco pride parade is lead by the lesbian leather motorcycle club, Dykes on Bikes, and has been since the late 1970's.

i think it's very odd to focus on kink in specific when there are other traumatizing things that come up at pride- people discuss abortion, abuse, being arrested, beaten by the police, being denied rights adoptive rights and healthcare, and so much more. pride will always have something that will make people uncomfortable, because it is a protest in the street to talk about the brutal reality of our lives

again, as i stated, i am fine with children's, all ages, etc. pride themed events being held but main pride parades, festivals, etc. are in fact designed to be protests, meaning provocative and brutally real. they're not just for waving rainbow flags and saying "yay we love being gay!" it's okay to know your own limits and boundaries but i think that if you know that that's upsetting to you, you may just not be suited for an inherently political event, and that's okay. hope that helps, take care, stay safe

#asks #answers #pride month #pride

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yourdailyqueer · 26 days

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Lilli Vincenz (deceased)

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Lesbian

DOB: 26 September 1937

RIP: 27 June 2023

Ethnicity: White - German / American

Occupation: Activist, journalist

Note: First lesbian member of the gay political activist effort, the Mattachine Society of Washington (MSW). She also invited women to meet every week at her home during the 1970s to create a safe venue for gay women to discuss gay activism and other lesbian-related issues, and her home became known as the Gay Women's Open House (GWOH).

#Lilli Vincenz #lesbian history #lgbt history #Lesbian Visibility Week #lgbt rights #lgbtq #lgbt #female #lesbian #1937 #rip #historical #white #german #activist #journalist

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katieaki · 1 year

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I am writing interactive post-apocalyptic lesbian cowboy fiction over on Twitter (as long as twitter doesn’t die on me partway through). You can download the whole 23-page story as it stands HERE. You can catch up on the most recent installation at the twitter, HERE. Our protagonist, Lou, is a rider for the Pony Express, the Wasteland’s only mail service. She’s in a weird situationship with a saloon girl she has unrequited feelings for and she definitely smells like a horse 90% of the time. This Wasteland is different than the Fallout franchise, BUT I would definitely recommend this story to New Vegas fans, especially. :--) I’ll put the synopsis under the cut, but leave you with this tantalizing little teaser that I just KNOW will get you intrigued.

Our story follows Louetta "Lou" Primrose, a rider for the Wasteland Pony Express, the Wasteland's leading (only) comprehensive postal service. Lou is our first heroine who does not belong to either the church of the Listening Lady or the church of Johnny Knives! She's just a normal woman! She puts her fringed chaps on one leg at a time like the rest of us.

We begin with Lou receiving an unusual package: an extremely glamorous woman with a few stamps pinned to her blouse. Not only is this not at all what the WLPE usually transports, but she also wants to go way off-route, all the way to the coast, which has not been inhabited since the times Before. Maybe it's just because the stranger, Holliday, is so pretty and sad, or maybe it's because Lou is feeling very weird after hooking up with her only-local-friend-but-also-unrequited-love, the saloon girl Venus of the Wastes, but Lou agrees to take her. Knowing she has bitten off way more than she can chew, she sends Holliday to the local shrine to see if they can borrow an extra horse while she tries to find supplies and a map. A little drunk from the couple of drinks she had to "fortify herself", Lou runs into Venus at the town pantry. Venus thinks she's being weird because of their hookup and Lou does her best to reassure her that she's being weird for different reasons. (To be fair, she did tell Venus that she loved her the night before, only to be turned (gently) down, so she is kind of being weird about that, too.) Lou helps Venus carry her groceries home, has a mini-panic attack about the assignment she probably shouldn't have accepted, but then agrees to meet Venus at the bathhouse that night for one last hot bath before the road (NOT to luxuriate in her radiant presence/look at her boobs). & That's basically where we left off! I update on a 2-week cycle. You have one week to vote, I have one week to write! You have until next Wednesday (2/22) to vote in the current poll.

#KatieAkiPresentsTheWasteland #original fiction #interactive fiction #choose your own adventure #writeblr #writing #post apocalyptic #cowboy #lgbtq fiction #Pony Express CYOA #Wasteland Pony Express #pony express #Lou Primrose #Lou

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canmom · 10 months

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Animation Night 164: Yaoi, Yuri

The fashion on Tumblr lately has been to divide everything in the world into yaoi and yuri, hasn't it? Well, tonight we don't need to make any abstract stretches of the imagination: it's time for anime where boys kiss boys and girls kiss girls.

So. Five minutes ago, before Tumblr deleted it, this post was off to a pretty good start! I was happily explaining about the differences of nuance between 少年愛 shōnen-ai, 耽美 tanbi, ジュネ june, やおい yaoi and ボーイズラブ bōizu rabu on the one hand, and on the other, why 薔薇 bara (rose) isn't a genre title but nevertheless the editor of 薔薇族 Barazoku ('rose tribe') magazine coined 百合 yuri as a distaff counterpart, the 'lily tribe', and that really caught on.

I was starting in on a brief sketch of some history, how Tokugawa Japan was super gay and had a defined set of social rules for gay relationships in the form of 男色 nanshoku, but this was squashed by the Meiji restoration, and thus gay manga became a subgenre cultivating its own specific otaku audience.

So then I was gonna tell you about how the early shōjo manga focusing on gay relationships, taking the old term shōnen-ai [which originally referred to pederasty], were quite nerdy and literary, but the subgenre rapidly grew in the 70s and 80s, cultivating an otaku audience of its own - primarily women termed, somewhat disparagingly, 婦女子 fujoshi but this demographic breakdown is certainly not absolute and there is a term for male fans, which is 普段し fudanshi. We coulda gone into the whole world of doujinshi, of the massive convention comiket; I coulda cracked open Kimi Rito's History of Hentai Manga for some interesting tidbits about how certain images become encoded as symbols and then reused routinely in manga.

And you know, I might have talked about how this is distinct from manga aimed at gay readers in gay magazines (like the above mentioned 薔薇族 Barazoku) which might be termed ゲイ漫画 gei manga. Perhaps we might mention here the upcoming adaptation of gay manga meme sensation kuso miso technique:

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I was maybe gonna talk a little about some of the older genre conventions of BL; the masc top or 攻め seme and the effeminate bottom or 浮け uke; maybe a little about how yaoi fandom got exported into anime fan culture in the West and the strange phenomenon of the 'yaoi paddle'.

...well, it looks like I managed to skim over all that anyway. Spite works wonders for typing speed, it turns out. But believe me, that's really just surface level stuff. We're working on a followup to the legend of Animation Night 69, so we'll be able to get in a lot deeper in a few weeks~

Anyway, even today, BL and yuri works rarely get adapted into anime in a particularly high profile way. But 'rarely' is not never! In Animation Nights past, well: on Animation Night 69 we watched the delightful 風と木の詩 Kaze to Ki no Uta (The Song of Wind and Trees), an OVA adapting the seminal (ha ha) shōjo manga about a French twink at boarding school. That was the direction of Yoshikazu Yasuhiko, known also for Venus Wars and definitely the subject of a future Animation Night, it was as moving and melodramatic as you could hope from 70s shōjo. Sayo Yamamoto (AN36) brought us the incredibly charming figure gay skating series Yuri on Ice; and then of course Kunihiko Ikuhara (AN155), bless his heart, made his always bold statements on yuri with Yurikuma Arashi ('Lesbian Bear Storm') and BL with Sarazanmai, which I will surely cover if we ever reach the point where we're like 'let's marathon a TV anime' again ;p

Tonight though? We'll be looking at a couple of relatively recent films on both sides of the fence.

For the BL wing, we have the film 海辺のエトランゼ Umibe no Étranger, aka L'étranger de la Plage or Stranger by the Shore. Kanna Kii, the mangaka, had previously worked as an animator at Studio Hibari, a small anime studio that dates back to the late 70s and broadly seems to specialise in shōjo. Kii returned there to design characters and supervise the film, and evidently Hibari were very excited to adapt the work of their alumnus, because they absolutely spared no effort.

The story centres on orphaned highschooler Mio and his neighbour Shun, an aspiring gay novelist on a remote island in Okinawa. The pair grew close three years before the start of the story, but Mio had to leave Okinawa; we join him now as he returns to that same shore, still holding feelings for Shun.

I'll admit, I don't know a ton about this movie - but it comes highly recommended by kvin who described it as one of an 'oasis' of strong BL works released around 2020. And the clips I've seen - well, they're the gifs used in this post, really nicely drawn scenes of affection. So I'm pretty excited!

Our yuri wing... well, there's a few good choices for yuri TV shows I could show you, but tonight it's late and we need something short and sweet, and that really narrows the field! What I have is あさがおと加瀬さん。Asagao to Kase-san [Kase-san and the Morning Glories], a one hour OVA adapting the manga 加瀬さん Kase-san by Hiromi Takashima. The OVA starts partway into the manga, when plant nerd Yui Yamada has already started dating her crush, the athletic Tomoka Kase. It follows the trials of the girls' relationship as they are coming towards the end of their time at school - relatively low-key, slice of life first relationship typea thing.

The animae was adapted by studio Zexcs under the direction of Takuya Satō, who you might remember as director of the first part of Armitage III [AN153]. Zexcs spun out of JC Staff at the end of the 90s, and they've been pretty busy since then - for me their most notable creation is Aku no Hana (The Flowers of Evil), a truly unique rotoscope anime with an incredibly engaging, tense story about teenagers and the imp of the perverse... which sadly never got the love it deserved! yes I'm still beating this drum!

Anyway, while I have not been able to find a ton of production information, I am told at least that Kase-san was a passion project for Satō - evidently a yuri fan given he also took on the adaptation of Otherside Picnic. It began first with five-minute web adaptation Kase-san and the Morning Glories in 2018 that's more of a musical montage of moments from the series, which was then able to be expanded the next year into an hour-long OVA...

youtube

A lot of romance stories focus on the characters getting together, so it's interesting that this one skips right over those chapters of the manga and gets going once the characters are already together, focusing more on the trials of an ongoing relationship between two goofy hormonal kids trying to figure out if this is just a class S thing or something that they want to last. A great deal of effort is put towards character animation, intimacy, the little flinches and reactions. You can read a little discussion about it here on ANN.

So! With apologies for the late start once more (T_T), it's time to begin! Animation Night will shortly be live at twitch.tv/canmom, and I hope you'll join me for a gay old time~

#Youtube #animation night #long overdue subject and i wish i had had more time to do it justice

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strawberrykisses128 · 26 days

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HAPPY LESBIAN VISIBILITY WEEK!!! I LOVE YOU LESBIANS!!!

drew my two oc's, Venus and Thu who are good friends... nothing more...

#oc #original art #original character #my art #wlw #lesbian #lesbian visibility week #lgbtqia

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pistolenprinz · 26 days

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PRIDE ICONS SERIES (Credit Appreciated!)

VAN DER LINDE GANG, Red Dead Redemption 2

Flag: Venus Lesbian Flag! Made by rubilyrider and les4lesflag on Twitter.

HAPPY LESBIAN VISIBILITY WEEK ❤️🧡❤️🧡❤️🧡❤️

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sevikasbeloved · 1 year

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BOUND AU PART 2!!

Link to part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/sevikasbeloved/696414117078171648/bound-au-sevika-x-reader-word-count

Ship: Sevika x Reader

CONTENT WARNING: EXPLICIT SMUT PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH THIS!!

William paced the apartment in his usual rut, finding himself standing at the furthest wall in the room at times, sighing deeply as the sound of a hammer connecting with the wall counteracted with his inaudible murmurings.

“She’s too loud, granted she works hard, given her circumstances.” he grumbled, trailing off the end of his sentence.

“Her circumstances?” You repeated, dragging your limp body over the sofa, trying to paint your face uninterested even when the lilt in your voice denied you.

“Nobody here goes unnoticed, Ricky did some digging and told me all about our handywoman,” He said in a derogatory tone, “She spent a couple years in the slammer, knows a few of our people, she’s got good connects, apparently.”

You allowed your body to fall completely on the sofa, taking the pillow from behind your head, and squeezing it tightly as you mourn the day your life became entangled with hers.

See it's been a week since you last spoke to her or finished what the two of you left off. By the third day of no contact you’d found yourself physically yearning for her touch. William noticed a change, but he was too self obsessed to think even for a second that it was anything outside of your “womanly emotions”, as he liked to say. You found yourself countless times, pressing your ear to the wall that divided the two of you, hoping she was doing the same. But she never called and never came.

“Y/N, get up! we’re gonna be late!” William yelled from the other room.

Your eyes begrudgingly looked up to the ceiling, silently calling on some higher power to have mercy on you as you joined your husband in his criminal escapades.

As the two of you, dressed in your finest evening wear, approached the venue by car, you craned your head to get a better view of the tall building, its intense and dazzling lighting putting a beaming smile on your face.

As you stepped out of the car you took in the outside, the red lights dyeing your skin a warm auburn colour as you basked in its warmth. As miserable as you were about the company you kept, like any other gal, you loved an excuse to dress up and glow under the city lights.

And William loved it too, he paraded you around like a trophy, flashing you on his arm to any man that would give him the time of day.

“William,” one of the bouncers grumbled, pulling the flimsy rope to one side, acutely acknowledging your existence as he stepped aside allowing the two of you in.

As the doors parted, an eruption of music and socialisation began and you were immediately immersed into the space. The floors were pristine, something that was hard to come by in the city, and the stage that stood front and centre overlooked the entire room, filled with unavailable tables.

To anyone else, this room would be daunting, but to you (mostly William), this room was something to conquer, it was expected for the richest of them all to have their own booth, and personal service, and he did just that. Your booth was dimly lit, and it sat above the rest of the room in its own personal balcony overlooking everyone and everything.

The table was already filled besides two seats in the centre clearly reserved for you and your better half. William wasted no time in mingling and introducing himself, almost completely forgetting you until someone said,

“Who’s the gorgeous whore on your arm, my boy?”

Your head snapped to the direction of the voice, where you were met with an old and wrinkled man, who’d clearly seen more wars than necessary.

“Put your claws away, missy, we’re all friends here!” He added on, laughing jauntily while he patted the backs of the men either side of him, as a show of security you assumed.

You kept quiet and took your seat, knowing that these chauvinistic pigs were Williams personal bank accounts and he’d do anything to keep them happy, including debasing you for a check.

You sat idly, watching the stage as a new act came out, each costume more elaborate and insane than the last - then to the crowds of people, normal people, hanging out and drinking with each other, strangers or not - and then you looked back to your William and his boys, and you recoiled.

“We could buy every little weasel down there in the pits!” one of the men cackled as he leaned over the edge of the balcony, his pint leaking onto the ground below.

“Ha! Why not, they clearly have nothing better to do with their sad lives.” The old man said.

William looked at you, a capricious smile slapped on his face as he wrapped his arm around you. On impulse you jolted away from him, standing upright, your chair scraping the floor.

All attention turned to you in an instant, and they all looked at you in utter bewilderment, as though you’d broken their perfect little circle jerk.

“Can I get anyone a drink?” You hurried out in an attempt to save face.

Among polite murmurs of ‘no thank you’s’ and ‘I really shouldn’t’, Williams hand grazed your back, as he glared up at you, clearly unnerved by your sudden outburst.

“Honey, w-“ he started,

“A whiskey?” You interrupted, “coming right up.”

You immediately moved from the booth, almost tripping on your own foot as you hurried down the spiral staircase that connected the two floors. You felt the room get warmer as you joined the packed bottom floor.

You glanced around, sure that you looked like a deer in headlights in the crowd. You began aimlessly walking so as to not become too much of a target to anyone that might have been leering, finding yourself at the foot of the stage right in the middle of an act.

The woman on stage stood tall, her arms slowing above her head as she shook her shoulders, revealing soft white wings that reached to the skies, almost double the size of her. She caught your eye, smiling a warm smile as she reached a hand down toward you for just a moment before she leaped back into performance.

You became quickly entranced by the freedom of her movement, not realising how long you’d been standing there until an eruption of applause startled you back to reality. The stage lights zeroed in on her as she bowed graciously before leaving the stage to be prepped for the next act.

“Mike, I’m sorry man, I’m cutting you off tonight.” You heard a familiar voice from behind you yell, though their tone was warm and welcoming.

Your head turned immediately, making sure your ears weren’t deceiving you.

And for a moment everything stopped when you saw her, the hanging lights above her creating a divine scene. You watched her push her hair out of the way as she moved across the bar, greeting patrons with intimidating but inviting smiles. Her skin glistened with sweat, the muscles on her arms almost pulsating as she’d mix another drink.

Your feet led the way as you sauntered over there completely entranced. As you got closer you heard the same grumble in her voice as she served customers. You sat on the far corner of the bar, where the light barely shone, watching her patiently as she worked, unable to bite away the smile on your lips.

A drunken customer who you assumed to be Mike, wandered back towards the bar, clearly looking to start something. Sevika just smiled with her arms crossed as she watched him circle the bar like a vulture, looking for an unattended drink. The two of you watched him as he edged closer and closer to you, and that's when she saw you, again.

Her smile faded, but didn’t leave, it twisted into a reckoning grin of some sorts as she approached you. Her shoulders dropped from their tensed position as she stood before you. She pressed her palms into the edge of the bar as she leaned forward into your space, holding a silence louder than the room itself.

She tilted her head to the balcony where William sat, then looked back at you, a smug smirk on her face.

“That’s your husband?” she husked, seemingly disappointed at your taste in men.

“Now you care about my married life?” You teased, crossing your legs over as you leaned in, closing the space between you. She let out a breathy chuckle as she grabbed a glass from under the counter, never once breaking eye contact with you.

“So what, are you stalking me now?” she said, rising back to her normal height, and as the space again increased between the two of you,

“Don’t think so highly of yourself.” You stated, your eyes oozing desire no matter how you tried to hide it. You didn’t want to give her any satisfaction, a part of you was still frustrated with her lack of communication, you couldn’t help but feel used and left to pick up the pieces.

“That night told me all I needed to know about myself, darling, don’t you worry.” She scoffed, pressing her tongue to her cheek as she shook up your drink, pouring it skilfully into the glass between the two of you.

You rested your chin against the ball of your palm, your nose flaring at what she was insinuating, your frustration revelling in her lack of awareness at your clear discontent.

“So is this what you do?” You said, your tone assertive as you dragged the drink towards you, trailing the edge of the glass with your rounded nail, “fuck anyone that bats an eyelid at you then forget their name?”

And in that moment you witnessed her shock for the first time, as minimal as she made it, she undoubtedly felt it. She broke eye contact with you, looking off to the side for a moment before looking back at you with an unreadable expression. She leaned in again, her eyes no longer on you but on the booth where your husband sat above,

“Well, if that's what you think, why are you here, Y/N, I’m not forcing you to be here,” She retorted, “Not like your little boy toy husband up there, right?”.

She pulled back slightly, her eyes completely readable and clearly unsympathetic towards you as she stared.

You unwillingly let out a measly breath at her sudden spite, your eyes unable to meet hers, you stood up from your seat,

“Fuck you, asshole.” You spat and suddenly, in a bout of hurt, you picked up your glass, spilling it all down her shirt, “I- Sevika, I’m so sorry I don’t know what-“

“You can go, since I’m the asshole.” She interrupted, her tone bold and stern.

Suddenly the room came back into focus again and you were once again one person in a room full of people who didn’t care for you at all. You stumbled through the ground, eyes filled with tears as you felt your way against the walls, feeling like they were closing in on you the closer you got to the washroom.

You found your way miraculously, almost collapsing as you gripped the porcelain sink edge, your eyes refusing to meet your reflection in the mirror.

You couldn’t explain what had just happened, but you knew it was all too much. You’d lived a simple life before her - as mundane as it was. She was like a fire, devastatingly beautiful, but fires eventually die, they’re exciting yet short-lived, or at least that’s what you told yourself.

You looked up at yourself in the mirror, ashamed and bleary eyed. But you’d decided, it wasn’t worth the trouble. She wasn’t worth the trouble.

You pressed your quivering lips together, skilfully reapplying your lipstick to the corners of your mouth again. You held your own gaze, as alien as it felt in this moment, reminding yourself of your position in life:

A trophy wife, a man’s greatest treasure, and that’s all you’d ever be.

The door swung open aggressively, the hinges almost screaming as it slowly closed behind the person who’d just stormed in. Your eyes flicker to her and you almost couldn’t help a scoff of annoyance as you locked eyes with her.

She didn’t say a word to you as she took off her alcohol soaked top, throwing it against the side of the sink beside you, leaving her in her trusty tank. She moved beside you, running warm water over her shirt as she bunched it in her fists trying to drown the bitter smell of alcohol.

You kept your eyes down, running your own hands under the warm water idly, occasionally letting your eyes wander from her hands to her face, scrunched up in anger or annoyance, or both.

As you watched her, and as too much time had passed you began to feel bad, you’d come in expecting something from her, an apology, a ‘way out’, whatever you wanted, you wanted without considering her as more than just the handywoman next door. You manoeuvred your body to face her, leaning your palm against the sinks edge. Her eyes flashed to you, brows furrowing for a moment before she turned off her tap, slinging the dripping wet shirt over her shoulder.

Just as she began walking toward the door you spontaneously grabbed her wrist, your hands barely fitting around them. Although the two of you knew she could easily wriggle free from your grip, she didn’t, but she didn’t turn around or say anything, she just waited for you to say something.

And so you took your cue, “Sevika, I’m the asshole, you don’t owe me anything, I guess I just got caught up in- with you.” You said, bearing it all for her to see, “I’m sorry, is what I’m trying to say, and you won’t have to worry about me pouring a drink on you when you’re working again.”

You let go of her wrist, a warm flush on your cheek immediately arising as you anxiously bated your breath, expecting to be denied forgiveness, and rightly so. But she instead continued to the door without any words. You immediately turned away from her, feeling the tears about to roll over.

Click.

Your ears perked up at the sound of a lock clicking into place, and you turned around to see Sevika stood with her back to you and her hand on the lock.

“Um, what are you doing?” You asked, truly unsure if she was going to kill you or not.

She still didn’t say a word as she turned around and slowly approached you. You felt a weird mixture of frustration and fear as she walked calmly towards you, her expression still unreadable, until she stopped a mere few inches from you, and then suddenly her lips curled into a smirk. That same charming smirk she had when you’d first met her, and you couldn’t help but be infected by it, a smile growing on your face too.

“I take it you forgive me then?” You asked daringly as your heart fastened.

“Shut the fuck up.” She growled before plunging her lips into yours, her hands gripping your neck as she guided your face into hers.

You didn’t hesitate to follow suit, desperately wanting nothing more than to finish what the two of you had started. Her hands dragged from your neck, following your silhouette till she reached the hitch of your waist, gripping it as she began drawing along your neckline with her warm lips.

Your head hung on its side, giving more space for her lips to stain dark bruises on you. Your heart was beating wildly as you felt her hands grip you with purpose, suddenly pulling you into her own warming torso.

“You know,” She mumbled through each kiss, “I wanted to come and see you,” She said as she started back up towards your jaw, “but apparently your husband wants you all to himself,” She finally relented from kissing you but held the little distance between you, her eyes piercing into yours, “I was followed the moment I left, night and day there was someone watching me whenever you were home.”

As she explained you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed - embarrassed that you made a scene and embarrassed that your husband would go to such levels, just for you.

“Sevika I-” You whispered, still under her entrancing gaze.

She cupped your chin between her thumb and index finger, a softer smile assuring you it was okay,

“Princess, nothing could keep me away from your pretty face.” She husked, placing a chaste kiss on your lips, caging you in between her and the sink, the cold contrasting with her warmth.

You raised a hand to meet her cheek, stroking it gently as she pressed her forehead into yours, her hands aimlessly caressing every curve of your body. You lifted your leg against hers, locking your ankle against the back of her thigh, intentionally pulling her body flush against you.

Sevika chuckled, a rich and smoky laugh, the sound of it cutting the silence of the bathroom plesantly. You felt her the digits of her finger drag across your sequin dress until skin touched skin, and you couldn’t help the silent gasp that escaped from your mouth as that familiar sensation of her hands edging that much closer to your core.

You kept your eyes trained on the details of her face as close as you were, listening to her shallow breaths as she blindly found the hem of your skimpy underwear. You watched as the wrinkle on the corner of her mouth became more prominent as she played with the lace hemming.

“I’m jealous of the person this was originally for, baby.” She teased, as she slid her middle finger under the flimsy garment causing you to suck in a sharp breath as she continued to edge you more and more.

“Well, I couldn't have asked for a better person to take them off” You whisper against the bridge of her nose. She hummed, taking your comment as command as she expertly slid her hand under your panites, dragging her fingers across your lips softly, her own body pressing into yours as though she was getting off to getting you off.

You bit your lip, muffling your beggish groan as she dipped into your slick, spreading it messily everywhere, only slightly brushing against your clit. She took her forehead from yours, looking hungrily into your eyes, her nose flaring only subtly.

In one swift motion, Sevika flipped you around so that you were facing the mirror, pressing your ass against her groin. You caught your bearings against the sink, gripping the sides tightly. She began kissing the back of your neck, moving your hair from where she pressed her lips to, taking her time to tend to every suckle and bite on your neck that began to redden.

Her hand snaked around to your front, caressing your clothed breasts with passionate vigour. You looked at her in the mirror, at her eyes, watching them soak up every minute detail of yourself as though it was the last thing she’d see. Her eye flicked up to yours in the mirror, and you both watched each other intently as you slowed down each and every movement - Your hand wrapped around her neck pulling her head to your neck again, you watched her dark and brooding gaze upon you as she latched her lips onto your shoulder, kissing it carefully yet undeniably in lust.

Her hand that sat at your breasts began gripping the dresses’ fabric, bunching it slowly around your waist, leaving you exposed from the waist down, all besides your pushed aside panties.

Sevikas lips followed your neck line to your ears, her free hand lining your jaw as she spoke,

“Let everyone hear how good I fuck you, baby.” The soft sound of her lips pressing together against the shell of your ear being enough to make you feral. You hummed in agreement, letting your hands slide further up the sink’s edge to give her a better angle.

Her hands fell to your ass, her left hand gripping your ass as her other expertly lined your lips, parting them as she followed them to your clit. You moaned as you felt a desirable pressure on your clit, the sensation spreading to your legs. She slowly began winding circles against your pressure point, pressing her body into yours as she interchanged between hard as soft motions.

“Oh fuck,” You breathed, your head dropping dows as you watched the digits on her fingers slide against your front before dipping back in, pulling you into a rocking motion in time with her sensuous strokes.

“You like that, baby?” She huffed in your ear as she kept a steady pace, her eyes watching your reactions as she tested every possible movement on your sensitive bud. You suddenly felt your legs begin to give way, your grip against the sink becoming impossibly tighter as you breathlessly mumbled words of encouragement.

With your best effort, you looked up again, craving her eyes on yours again as she fucked you shamelessly. Your eyelids drooped as that familiar sensitivity crawled through every bundle of nerves on your body. Her eyes were almost fastened as she peered over her hooked nose at you with a brazen hunger.

Her hand moved from your clit, leaving an empty feeling in your stomach at the sudden loss of sensation. You felt a sudden rush up your spine as you were left wanting, keeping your eyes still on her as you felt her finger glide through your slick, teasing your pulsing core.

Her free hand rose to your face, pushing the loose hairs behind your ears as she kissed your temple with genuine care, her slight show of domestic care surprising you pleasantly and making you want her evermore.

“You know,” She started as she edged her middle finger along the edge of your hole, causing you to tense up as you archer further into her, “I never stopped thinking about you,” She pressed further, inconspicuously sliding a second finger in, satiating every hunger you had for her as you moaned unashamedly, completely ignorant to the single door dividing you from that mundane life you lived and the new one begging to rise to fruition.

“I want you.” You whispered through broken moans. She let out her own small moan, concealed by a cut throat growl as she thrust her fingers into you until she bottomed out, curling them ever so slightly causing your toes to grip the fabric on the sole of your heels.

You eased your grip on the sink, letting your hand fall against her hench shoulder, as she thrust into you again and again at a blinding pace.

You felt your body weight fall against her fingers as her arm tensed, holding you up like you were nothing but featherweight, as she curled against your walls, beckoning you with the motion of her fingers to come.

Your vision blurred with tears as she repeatedly fucked you where it felt best, her warm breath patting against your cheek as she pressed her body into you, placing her free hand against the wall, truly caging you in as she fucked you relentlessly.

“I’m so close, please don’t stop, please-“ you managed to sputter out as you felt the room get smaller, as every sensation on your body centred to your abdomen, and a warm feeling began to pool in your stomach.

“You can do it, baby, come for me.” She huffed, almost out of breath.

You felt each stroke as you neared the edge, your core tightening around her fingers as a white hot light flashed and your eyes fluttered close as you allowed her to fuck you through your climax, overstimulating you entirely.

You let out an almost guttural moan as you doubled over onto the sink, her hand flying to grab you around the waist as your legs completely gave in, going limp as they slipped between hers.

Your hair laid messily against your face, the sweat acting as a lament. You kept your head low as you caught your breath again, completely dazed out.

Sevika’s warmth found you once more as she kissed your neck, trailing a line down to your shoulders edge, before she slowly slid her two fingers out, gliding her thumb against your clit, causing you to jolt in her arms, sharing an exhausted chuckle with her.

“You did so well, princess.” She whispered, the room's silence suddenly re-emerging as she spoke, her voice bouncing off the concrete walls.

Your bottom lip rolled between your teeth as you tried to hide your blush from her. You couldn’t understand why, even after she fucked you into next week, you were still so nervous around her.

You pulled yourself up again, leaning gently onto her front as you let your dress fall down again, watching Sevika in the mirror as she fixed all the small wrinkles in your dress, her skilled hands gently gliding up and down your torso.

You suddenly felt a hand run up the length of your thighs, readjusting your underwear again, the redness in your cheeks becoming embarrassingly apparent. She looked up at you again, a suave smile on her face as she brushed her palm against your inner thigh, giving it a small squeeze before she let go again, stepping back to give you a way to move again freely.

As soon as her warm body left you, you wanted nothing more than to drag her again into your space, but you held your composure, which proved easier than you thought, given how spent your body was.

You turned to look at her in the flesh again, reigniting that flutter in your stomach as you looked at her features again in the flesh, recognising details you had been unable to see in the fogged mirror.

You leaned up against the sink again, pulling her by her belt buckle towards you. Her hands feel either side of you, grasping the sides of the sink mirroring the ghost of your hands.

The two of you stood and stared, a mere hair's breadth away, and there was almost a mutual agreement that this wasn’t over.

“How do I know you won’t just disappear again?” You asked, eyes searching hers for an answer before she spoke.

But instead she kissed you, deeply and passionately, her lips lingering on your for a moment longer,

“Do you trust me?” She responded, and as you looked into her eyes and she looked into yours, you knew the question was bigger than this moment, bigger than any life you could’ve imagined with William.

And so you said,

“Yes.”

#sevika #arcane #sevika x reader #wlw

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