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dimiclaudeblaigan · 8 months

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No but something I love is how fucking loyal Miklan really is (in Hopes specifically since we don't have enough information in Houses).

At the camp, he takes his job seriously. Very seriously. He doesn't act begrudging or like he's just doing anything by force. As the chapters go on he not only goes from relatively aloof to a full fledged commander (which is great development in that span of chapters btw considering how fast the story has to progress) and one who fights for Faerghus because he wants to (why would he reassure the player that he's going to, literally, hold down the fort? Why doesn't he flee when his life is in immediate danger despite that Dimtiri prefers his allies to flee and save their lives over sacrificing themselves? Why does he like helping citizens who had their lands destroyed by the war, despite being a bandit who used to plunge towns just like those?).

At any time when the Empire was attacking, he could've surrendered and even joined their side because of not liking Faerghus and its people... if he didn't like Faerghus and its people. Also, someone brought this up to me once that Miklan likely has family in the Empire still, because his mother was from the Empire. He had a perfectly good out that wouldn't even necessarily be considered treason to Faerghus, i.e. surrendering and going to the Empire to protect that side of his family.

He doesn't. He dies for Faerghus. It was both a matter of honor due to the fact that he was finally living the life he always should've been and wanted to be respected for that, and also his loyalty that followed in the past's wrongs being righted. No matter what you think of Miklan post disinheritance, he was the heir who was removed because he didn't have a Crest. All over just that, despite that Sylvain having a Crest never meant they didn't still have someone capable of fighting off Sreng invasions.

They had someone able to wield the Lance of Ruin, so why did it matter if he was officially the heir? Miklan felt like his life was stolen from him (and I'm not saying what he did to Sylvain was okay either). Dimitri gave him all of that back and he started to become loyal to Faerghus and its king because Dimitri was giving the chance even the man's own father never gave him from the moment Sylvain was determined to have a Crest.

What happened in his life before Dimitri had him brought to him as soon as he became king is, in a way, almost like it never happened as far as Miklan's behavior. It was obviously there at first, but over time it's like it never happened. That is, if someone met him and didn't know about his past, by chapter 9 they'd never even know he'd had that history. He was the person he would've been years ago if he hadn't been disinherited, which led to the mess that led to him being disowned (and he says he just "left", but Matthias doesn't mince facts. At all. If that had been the case he wouldn't just say he disowned him. He would admit Miklan ran away. That means Miklan claims he left as a means of coping and trying to convince other people that it was his choice and not forced on him).

Miklan became a lot more loyal than he's ever given credit for, both in the game and in the fandom. Gwendal did recognize it, but that's about all we're given.

Gwendal corrected himself when Miklan died, referring to him instead as Sir Miklan instead of the insults he was spewing during their fight which were very clearly pissing Miklan off; but Miklan kept fighting and defending the fort, not just because he wanted to prove Gwendal wrong but because he was here because he was pulled out of his life as a bandit. The people he was defending the fort for were the people who effectively gave him his life back.

Basically, he would've been there in that fort defending it anyway if he had lived the life he should have to begin with. If his value was acknowledged all along, he would've been defending the most important fort in Faerghus all along (if this exact scenario occurred and everything was the same except him being disowned in the first place). He would be there being the commander and fighter he was supposed to be.

Mind you, it was the king himself who gave him that chance, meaning the person who reigns over Faerghus and has the most power to change whatever the hell he wants - including how people with Crests and without are treated. Miklan was part of a fight to better their society and be part of the new generation taking over. Nobody could truly change things unless the king - the top power - had the thought to change them (not saying Lambert thought the political climate was good the way it was, but he clearly had other priorities and it didn't seem to be something weighing on his mind. He may not have even truly noticed the problems and power discrepancies because he was so focused on other things).

However, the moment the king thought to change all that old stuff, Miklan was one of the first people who came to mind, and one of the first people he took action regarding, to integrate into his new army (and he even mentioned completely rearranging his army and whatnot, and then we find out he had Miklan located basically right after becoming king. We had a two year timeskip and Miklan had been there for those two years because of how soon after Dimitri was crowned that he had decided to bring Miklan back and give him another chance).

If the king sought to change things and was taking active action to prove it, that was something Miklan could see and realize was actually going to happen. It wasn't a blind trust - he could see Dimitri was actually doing it. He had a reason to be able to trust him with this.

He was also able to trust the people who were watching over him, i.e. the people Dimitri had making sure he didn't revert back to any sort of banditry. Those people could have easily faked it, made up that he did something and that they had killed him on the spot. Dimitri trusted those people not to do that of course, but those people were not told to bring him to Dimitri if he did anything. They were told to apprehend him and kill him immediately (which is reasonable, given what he'd done in the past, and they wouldn't want to try to wait to get Dimitri over to wherever they were. If Miklan escaped in that time, they'd just have a big problem on their hands).

So that is to say, those people could've just faked it at any point and killed him. They didn't. They, like Dimitri, were willing to give him another chance provided he didn't do anything bad.

The same goes for Felix and everyone else who had qualms about him being allowed into their army. Dimitri explicitly stated if anyone had issues with his appointment as a commander to "by all means" kill him themselves. He literally made it an open option for his friends to just up and kill him if they truly couldn't forgive him (which at that point was more reasonable of a time because the war was still new and people didn't know if they could trust him with this specific appointment yet. By later in the story I don't think it would have been as reasonable for someone to try to kill him after he'd already been proving himself).

In other words, nobody did it. Everyone, literally everyone, backed off and respected Dimitri's decision (and technically Sylvain and Matthias' as well). None of those people, even when given open opportunity, turned a weapon on him. Not one. These people all gave him a chance. These are the same people he died fighting for, and for himself to be able to feel like he was fighting and dying for what he would have to begin with if he hadn't been disinherited - Faerghus and its people.

In the end Miklan was in both rank and heart a top ranking commander of Faerghus and he both appreciated it and knew he appreciated it. He was looking forward to the future Dimitri would bring, basically saying that he thinks Dimitri is a fool ("weak-willed") for it but that he now believes in it too. If anyone wants to try arguing those points, I have receipts as the young folk call them, fresh from Miklan himself about his feelings about it as spoken to Catherine and Shamir!

Miklan fought for the future he was hoping to see, and he died protecting that future. Again, not something he by any means whatsoever had to do. He was tasked with guarding the fortress, but was never told to lay down his life defending it. After years and years of being hateful and angry, he finally had some peace of mind and hope for what he could be. He was loyal to Dimitri in the end because Dimitri was loyal to him - that is, he kept his word and Miklan was able to thrive in Dimitri's society without being a bandit or having to worry about his future because of his status.

Like Dimitri said, the only thing holding him down by that point were his past mistakes. It was up to Miklan to do something about that for himself with the opportunity he was given to fix it. Dimitri said here, fix it, and Miklan said okay, and worked to fix it. For me the saddest part is that he didn't even get enough time to properly fix it and be able to be free of his past. He died for Faerghus though, with his dying words being that he was able to buy them time (to arrive and fight back against the attacking Empire). That's not something someone who holds a resentful grudge would say in their last moments. He was grateful he managed to buy the other fighters time, even though it cost him his life.

hopes was a dumpster fire a whole lot of times but its incorporation of miklan into the plot was not one of them. miklan fire emblem my love you will live on in my heart and in my fics. i am also deeply grateful to hopes for uh i guess hopes-canonizing (hopesonizing???) basically every one of my headcanons about him before the game came out.

#Miklan #Miklan Anschutz Gautier #remember the time i mentioned working on a fic and it was an au and like #i had planned to kill him and glenn off together for the plot? and how i scrapped it bc i got too attached to them?#and i couldn't go through with it when i thought abt sylvain and miklan's could be would be relationship?#that was me on the right track for the rest of my life. even back then i see i had a FEELING #i just KNEW something. funny enough in hopes miklan has a line that's like #pretty close to what i had him say in the fic... so uh my assertions and understandings of his character #were scarily accurate before we had anything but him as an enemy in houses to go by #and what dimitri talked abt post that chapter. uhhh maybe i am a miklan whisperer???#anyway miklan is easily by far the most underrated character in the entirety of hopes #and one of the most underrated characters overall #he has one of the most interesting stories from start to finish (esp in hopes)#how he was a noble family's heir to being disinherited to becoming an angry and hateful child #to growing up like that bc evidently nobody tried to steer him on the right path #to getting disowned only to be disowned for a lol measly for few months or so TOPS in hopes lmao #before being told to come back. in houses he was disowned presumably exactly as long but #dimitri wasn't the top power of faerghus. he couldn't have made the decision he got to make in hopes #so ofc the whole yeehaw lance of ruin thing happened. in hopes' case he was gone that long and just #took a vacation basically and came back and was basically told /B E H A V E/#except everyone was finally trying to steer him in the right direction even if it was SUUUPER fucking late #and he was grown up and set in his ways/behaviors/mannerisms that arose due to his childhood and onward #BUT from there and after being a very spiteful bandit he pulled himself together and was genuinely happier for it #enough to the point of considering himself ''weak willed'' to have started to believe in these visions dimitri has for the future #it makes me sad how he died in ag and like... even outside of ag there was never any hope of that family being whole #they weren't whole from the moment sylvain was determined to have a crest #and they couldn't be whole in houses bc dimitri never had the chance to change anything #then in hopes they could never be whole bc a different gautier dies in every hopes route #my poor fam never even had a chance to be whole again even though they genuinely tried so hard to be ;n; ;n; ;n;

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toasteaa · 10 hours

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😅 and 🫂 PLEASE !

Pining stage asks💙

😅 did anyone ever mistake you two for a couple? how did you both react?

Who HASN'T mistaken Eclair and Neuvillette for a couple, let's be real. The gestionnaires (most of them), the Melusines; hell, their Archon has mistaken them for being a couple before. But it's subtle. Indirect. A little cloud of gossip about them when they're not around. It's not THE talk of the nation, just a bit of afternoon gossip fodder for the gestionnaires since they're the ones that see Eclair and Neuvillette the most.

But being mistaken for a couple directly? Having someone, perhaps a sweet mannered old woman, call them a lovely couple while on post work evening stroll?

Eclair is shocked, to say the least. Schools her expression in almost immediately and tries to think of a response. Everyone in Fontaine knows Neuvillette. Everyone knows Neuvillette does not get into relationships. He doesn't even say he has friends. But...she's silently flattered that they were mistaken for a couple. It flutters around quietly in her chest and slowly brings some color to her cheeks. A feeling that she's also silently stamping back into place because she is not in a relationship with Neuvillette. Even though the thought is extremely nice.

Even if she tries to deny it, she's not able to get it out once the old woman takes Eclair’s hands in hers; showering her with those same sweet comments little old ladies she's helped before always seem to give her. Only now it's peppered in-between stories of never having seen the Iudex as much as she has these past few years and how much happier and more relaxed he seems now.

"Th-thank you, mémé;" stammering? The detective that can stare a gun down its barrel without flinching is stammering at the thought of being mistaken for Neuvillette's partner? "But the Chief Justice and I simply work together. We aren't a couple."

But it's like she's said nothing at all. The old woman just smiles warmly. Knowingly. You can't lie to grandma, don't you know?

Neuvillette's reaction on the other hand, could be considered a non-reaction to most. But that's because he goes to his mind first. Wonders what they see that could warrant such a reaction. From what he knows, humans only say these kind of things after seeing a romantic interaction between two people. In that case, have his advances been noticeable? Has Eclair accepted them in some way that he's missing? He would like to be sure before making any assumptions, but finding time to ask Eclair in between the times where they're both busy and inundated with work is...difficult.

"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, but any relationship I have with Detective Dumont is professional and entirely work related. She is my coworker, first and foremost, and a...colleague." It's not a lie, but it's not necessarily the entire truth. But...well, if there's anything he's learned, it's that sometimes withholding parts of the truth is necessary. For others and for himself.

🫂 what's one significant moment of physical contact you had during the pining stage?

Oh...there's something to be said about Neuvillette and, well, anything physical. He seems untouchable because he is untouchable. As the Chief Justice, there is an image of unobtainability about him. As a being that has persisted for 500 years, he holds a certain unknowability in his hands. No one can get close to Neuvillette because no one really knows Neuvillette. Whether that's because they haven't really tried to get to know him or because he is the Iudex. And they see him exclusively as the Iudex. Of course, he has put up boundaries between himself and others as well; justifying it as being a necessary and needed barrier in order for him to remain a stalwart servant to the will of his Nation.

That, however, has not made his existence any less...lonely.

Nevertheless, Neuvillette has a station to maintain and cannot allow idle thoughts of melancholy to seep in whilst he's in the middle of his work. A trial will not be held at bay while he wrangles in his rarely expressed emotions, struggles frustratingly to find the correct files that were misplaced days ago, and -

And Eclair is there. Her hand careful and grounding against his. He hadn't heard her come in, far too busy rushing to have his attention split. And the file...it's there, in her other hand. He hadn't misplaced the file; there were extra reports that she was finishing. He knew this. She says as much, but he isn't listening. He only...feels. Feels the reassurance of her tone, the lilt of it bringing a kind of...peace to him. Her hand has moved away from his, but he can still feel the weight of it. The warmth of it. She's still speaking, but her touch has moved - adjusting his robes lightly where they've creased, straightening his jabot and making sure it's pinned neatly, before smoothing down the panels of his mantle against his chest. It's an...odd feeling. An action he's observed being done, but never had it done to himself. Never imagined it would be done to him. No one gets this close to him. He doesn't let anyone get this close to him. And yet...this touch is not unwelcomed. No, it's...it's calming. Soothing. Grounding.

Is this what the touch of another person feels like?

She's looking at him, he realizes, with that critical eye. Searching for something like she always is. He wonders, vaguely, what she sees. Notices the gleam of something...softer in her gaze. He wishes he knew what it was. He wishes he could understand why her hand against his chest has done this to him. Made the flow of Hydro swirl beneath his skin. Made his senses a little sharper. Yet the only thing he can do is thank her for her assistance. Feel something within him stir again at her smile. And want to -

The hour's chime breaks the bubble of reverie; he will be late if he does not leave immediately. The Iudex is never late to a trial. Another brief (yet appreciative) thanks before he's excusing himself and striding out of his office. The station of the Iudex is one that must be meticulously maintained. And yet...

He cannot help but feel the lingering weight of Eclair's touch and distantly wonder if he would ever allow himself to feel it so intimately again.

#toast talks #ask game #genshin impacted #oc tag: Eclair Dumont #Toast make an answer a reasonable length challenge: impossible #Wriothesley called Eclair Neuvillette's work wife ONCE and I think that interaction is the most confused Neuvillette's ever been.#'My relationship with the detective is not legally binding.' 'Oh? But you are in a relationship with her? 🤨'#Give him a break he's OLD. He doesn't understand work wife work husband jargon. Now he's just confused and yearning.#Also...I genuinely couldn't pick a favorite physical contact moment because there are *so many*#Neuvillette experiences physical affection for once and is immediately craving it once it's gone.#Will he say anything about it? Nope.#Will he eventually return the sentiment? You'll have to wait and see (the answer is yes -)#Jesus fucking christ these answers are long I'm SORRY I have ADD and I take adderall :(#I STARTED writing the answer to the first one at work btw. These took me all day to answer and I am only slightly ashamed -

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milflewis · 2 months

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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it #my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with #and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l #lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am #glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone #since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life #he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even #harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken #about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better #my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he #hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his #personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the #nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off #he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he #still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay #long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart #i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him

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pinkished · 3 months

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ok i have to ask (if you can pick, that is) what’s your favorite my chemical romance song(s)? and also, any favorite album/era? (feel free to just gush about mcr if you’d like lol, i’m all ears!)

aaaaah eli, hello and thank you so much for the ask beeb!!! <3 my inner emo teen is practically screaming with joy haha also i'm s o sorry, i couldn't pick just one *insert skull emoji here* favorite mcr songs: - the foundations of decay - make room!!! - ambulance - na na na - sing - planetary (GO!) - party poison - S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W - DESTROYA - the kids from yesterday - dead! - welcome to the black parade - house of wolves - sleep - disenchanted - helena - the ghost of you fave album for sure is danger days but the pure nostalgia and aesthetic goes to black parade for era <3 I haven't listed to them in a hot minute but we're changing that rn!! ^_^ always feel free to drop in my inbox beeb, and if you're feeling up to it i'd be hyped to know all of your faves too!! so so much love to you, this was hella fun and i'm gonna have a good time bringing their stuff back into my listening <3

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meredithbeckham · 8 months

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(hanna really went all out.) when she loves somebody, she doesn't hold back. when you're hanna's friend, she forgives a lot.

pll + guts

#hannamarinedit #hanna marin #plledit #prettylittleliarsedit #pll #*#stop hurting her :(#hanna's capacity for forgiveness her capacity for goodness even when she knows it isn't deserved #how she saves jenna from the fire how she's so certain they have to help ali have to bring her back despite everything #'you were the best friend i ever had. that meant a lot to me. you meant a lot to me. but you were also the worst enemy i ever had #and i can't believe it took me this long to realize that. you can't reach into my life anymore not unless i let you. you're gone. and i am #so over missing you' FOREVER #all the people in hanna's life that have hurt her - ali her father mona lucas caleb jenna #and how she wrestles with this #and her willingness to forgive and have compassion for them #but how she also protects herself and draws lines when necessary (with varying degrees of effort)#i would die for her #strongest most emotionally intelligent self aware girl im love u #she loves so powerfully <3

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corrodedcoughin · 2 years

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Listen I'm having so much fun au-ing you have no idea

Future Sci fi AU loosely based on the video game Hardspace Shipbreaker where Eddie is a mechanic who dismantles and strips spaceships down to either be sold as parts or melted down and reused.

It wasn't what he wanted to do with his life, not even close. But it pays. Pays off his debts. Pays off Wayne's medical bills (that Wayne doesn't want him paying, but what choice do they have? Plus - Eddie loves Wayne too much to not do something). And it wasn't like he had much of a choice, with Eddie struggling to find work at regular job. But thanks to Dear Old Dad and his criminal ways, Eddie knows how to break into a spaceship and strip it for parts.

So that's how he finds himself working for Thatcher Ship and Salvage - just a cog in the corporate machine. Which he fucking hates, but he loves his uncle more. So he signs up, gets the job, and ends up working out of a Salvage station currently orbiting Earth.

When he said he wanted to see Earth, that wasn't what he fucking meant.

It's a large station divided up into smaller Salvage Bays, each of which is assigned one Shipbreaker. The bays are so far apart he can barely see the others. He's alone. Just him, the ships, and the void of space. Each Bay comes with its own Habitation Unit, like a shitty apartment/workshop that can fit one person. Complete with thin mattress that feels worse than the one he had at home. It wouldn't be as bad if they all lived together, Eddie thinks. Him and the other mechanics working this station. But they don't.

He goes to sleep alone, wakes up alone, makes his corporate approved space food that tastes like cardboard, suits up and then works a shift breaking down ships.

Occasionally the team at the head station will call him, give him instructions or updates on incoming deliveries. Wayne sends him emails almost daily, and Eddie will spend an evening replying. Suit off and hunched over the computer in his unit.

It's dangerous work, but the hazard pay is worth it (it has to be, or else he'll spiral wondering why he's even here), and Eddie is fucking good at it. He's got the speed, the skill, and the knowledge.

But eventually even that isn't enough to get him through the day. He's a social creature, he loves to talk and to touch and to spend his time surrounded by his people. But he is alone, and the only other voice he's heard I'm months is his boss. Does not fucking count.

He has Wayne's emails, and the messages Gareth and Jeff will send him (along with the occasional song he can download into his helmets radio system). He appreciates it so much. It's kept him going as long as it has but Eddie aches. He wants a hug. Someone to touch his fucking shoulder. To feel the warmth of another person, to hear them breathing next to him, to feel their heart beat. Eddie wants to make fucking small talk and hear someone laugh at a dorky joke he makes. He wants to hear gossip about someone he doesn't know. He wants to connect.

So Thatcher Ship and Salvage connects him to some bullshit "Employee Wellness and Connection Program" like fucking pen pals at school. And Eddie grumbles to himself but goes along with it because what choice does he have? He has a feeling they only signed him up because if he quit they'd have to train up someone and replace him. Fucking corporations, man.

He gets assigned a person also on the program, and they send emails. Get to know each other. Connect. Talk so Eddie doesn't lose his mind in space. And if it goes well, they might even get a weekly phone call. And fuck, doesn't that hurt. Since he isn't even allowed one with Wayne. Says it'll cost too much to connect all the way down to Earth.

It's an email at first. From a man working an office on earth, also being signed up by his manager. A man named Steve.

Steve, who drones away in an office building under a manager who hates him because his father owns the building they work in. Owns the whole Harrington Corporation. They have to play nice to the Boss' son. So they resent him, and he is alone save for Robin. The girl who works in the office mail room. Who doesn't take his shit but understands that he's actually a good guy. He is her platonic soulmate. Complete with shitty apartment they live in together. The windows let in a draught, and the pipes leak - but at least he doesn't live with his parents anymore.

And now he has to email this stranger in space, who surprisingly, replies with one hell of an email. Long and wordy sure, but funny and personable. Genuinely seeking connection.

Or maybe Steve's projecting because he's lonely. Still under the thumb of his father, working a job he hates, with only one friend his age.

I just- two lonely boys connecting through daily emails and the expanse of space.

hello! sorry I took so long to get back to you!! can i just....beg for more of this please? i am absolutely besotted with this concept. Your description of Eddie is so perfect, like of COURSE he needs to speak to people! He needs to be witnessed and to entertain and his engage and get that feedback from another living thing.

At the points where he can't get in contact with anyone, before he gets 'matched' he'll talk to the faces that he sees in the whirls of the metal panes that cover the various ships he takes apart. He gives them different voices just to try and get himself a bit more invested but even then, he's heart sore for somebody to talk to in person. For somebody who wants to talk to him, for somebody to just listen and maybe riff with him on his ideas and fantasies all face to face so he can read their expression, try and predict how they might react based on body language.

So when he gets matched Eddie thinks this is just going to be another online relationship. Not that he doesn't take value in being able to talk to Wayne, Gareth and Jeff. He just desperately wants something more to make the isolation a little warmer. Eddie doesn't have high hopes but he's willing to try anything at this point.

He fires off his first email, not expecting a reply any time soon. Really, he's expecting a dry half-assed reply from somebody that doesn't give a shit about him and is being paid by the hour to talk to sad and lonely space rats. What he doesn't expect is a reply that has him breaking out in a small smile as this guy, Steve, describes his cubicle neighbour and the phlegmy noises he has to put up with daily. Yes Steve understands that when you are made up of 95% mucus and evolved to live on a gas planet and don't have any ears like his office neighbor, there might be some odd squelching noises but he swears the guy next to him hams it up, trying to push Steve out because Steve maybe once complained to robin a little to loudly about the snot bag and oozing he could see seeping under the cubicle divider. There was no oozing, Steve just felt like being dramatic. He tried to apologise but short of saying 'sorry about the snot comments, I'm sure you don't actively seep' Steve didn't know what to do.

By the end Eddie has a laugh stored in his chest, too scared to let it out. He's drafting up his reply in his head, hoping to endear this stranger with a story about a breakdown of what he thought would be a normal ship but turned out to have a portal in the toilet where ghost ducks would just randomly spawn from.

Eddie and Steve start to reply on their email exchanges. They are coming up to the 'review' point where a supervisor determines if they get a phone call and to be honest, both of them are terrified. They don't know if they want the phone call to then find out the relationship doesn't carry over to 'live' conversation or worse, find out its even better than email and hurting themselves more because they can both feel themselves falling for the other.

The day Eddie finds out he's been granted a phone call (pure audio, the company wont push for video) to Steve, that same night, he's the most productive he's been in months. Finishing his allocated breakdown in record time. He then curses himself for the fact that he has a wide-open afternoon to worry about this call. He panics, he worries, he can't eat, he's starving, he's resorted to tidying his quarters in an effort to distract himself. But then the comms screen rings, Eddie presses accept and there he is, voice through the speakers 'hello? Eddie? fuck! is this thing even working? i swear to g-'

Eddie sits down heavily on his chair, chest warm from the voice he didn't know was absolutely of course, perfect for the man he'd been emailing 'hey Harrington, getting worked up already? must have been pretty desperate to speak to me'

they only have 20 minutes allocated to talk, it's not enough but it's better than either of them could have hoped for.

#I am so so sorry about how long this took I was gone for a bit I’m #sorry!!!#also this is…questionable at best #I LOVE EVERYTHING YOU SENT ME!!!#I could feel my heart ACHE #how do you DO that???#stranger things #steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #ask

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gxlden-angels · 1 year

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how do i stop my internalized homophobia?

Ngl anon, it's less stopping it and more talking over it. If you were raised in a strict, homophobic environment, that little voice is still going to be there cause it was a part of your development. So you shout over it instead with new data

"Being gay is a sin" okay I hear you but my friends are gay and I can't really see them as sinful people

"You're broken/wrong/living in sin" okay speak your truth bestie but I'm happier living my life authentically so I'm okay being wrong for now

"You're going to Hell" cool cool but what about now? Am I happy right now? Am I living this life in a way that benefits me now? I'm focusing on this life, not a potential afterlife

I'm very STEM-oriented so my therapist and I refer to it as "Plotting new data points" You kinda just have to listen to the internalized homophobia, say okay okay I hear you but have you considered this new data point that suggest a positive correlation between being openly LGBTQ and my own happiness? Yea I know this was regarded as a sin before but statistically speaking the chances of it actually being sin are insignificant. Yea it doesn't even have a 95% confidence interval. Loving who I am seems to have a positive outcome though but I'll need more positive queer experiences to be certain

#I don't know if this makes sense #It took a long time to realize but you kinda gotta put the cart before the horse so to speak #you gotta do the thing and pretend like it isn't terrifying before it becomes less terrifying #And I don't mean you have to come out or go to pride or have gay sex #I mean like. Saying in your brain I Am Gay #and noting the fact that you didn't get smitted by Jesus or brain exploded by the Lord #You take in new data #and the old data never goes away. it would be considered altering your research then #but as you continue to get new data it starts to lose its power #it becomes less statistically significant #Until it eventually doesn't bother you like it use to #I won't pretend like my internalized homophobia is gone #internalized transphobia too despite me potentially getting top surgery soon #but each day is a new day for research #it's still there #and each experience adds another data point #good luck anon #anon tag

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deus-ex-mona · 6 months

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it’s that time of week again…

#and M A N today’s getsuyoubi was extra yuuutsu #first i dropped 2 cup things filled with water. cool. a mess was made. nice.#t h e n my workstation shook by itself and one of the cup things toppled down again. only it was filled with (diluted) acid this time!!!!#i wish it fell onto me bc at l e a s t my bad day would’ve ended with just an acid burn instead of getting worse #bc *then* we found out that we were near-out of [insert reagent here] that we need to run blanks for [test thing] yay!!!!! joy!!!!!!!!!#so we had to use a substitute solvent (sadge)#if only it ended there aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #i left work on time -> waited forever for the delayed bus -> decided to get some coffee or sth as a pick me up t h e n…#the coffee place happened to run out of single bags so i decided to put it into my bag instead (mistake)…#…a n d dropped my phone while trying to prop the stupid drink upright so it wouldn’t spill.#unfortunately for me though... some rando picked up my phone some time within the 30s-1 min wherein i realised that my phone was gone…#…and took it home with him instead of handing it to the customer service counter at the nearby train stations. ha.#called my phone a couple of times with the phone from a customer service counter but he~~ didn’t~~ pick up~~~~~~~~~#and so. long story short. i had to leave the house an extra time to go to this guy’s place to pick up my bb (read: my phone)#bc the dude~~~ can’t~~~~ speak~~~ english~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ so he didn’t understand me when i told him my location~~~~~~~#and now it’s almost 8.30 in the pm. im waiting for the delayed bus to go home from wherever tf i am now. and i haven’t eaten all day :))))#(aside from a small cake thing but it’s negligible tbh)#aND HOLY FK I HATE THIS I FLAGGED DOWN THE BUS BUT IT SKIPPED THE STOP HELP ME I JUST WANNA GO HOME #.am i allowed to cry yet. i. just. i just wanna eat my dinner.#…come to think of it my drink ended up spilling in my bag while i was hunting for my phone. so. there’s that to clean up ig.#ughhhhhhhhh i wish that guy had just left my phone where he found it. s o b s #so yeah. if you read this i hope you had a good monday at least…#this truly is my ✨t r a g i c c o m e d y✨

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art-from-the-pantry · 5 months

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I am insanely in Love with this drawing. Tumblr likes to botch the resolution tho, so if you want to see it in its full glory please click it (or open it in another tab, that also works)

#Sure it looks less like it is made of copper and more like it was made of brass but hey #For that sweet lighting effects? I can move past that #Also I am so so insanely proud of the lighting like look at it #Sure the dual light sources were on accident when playing around with some shading ideas but hey #And the lack of background is a little annoying to me but my art software would have crashed if I added any more layers with effects #This is part of a bigger project (an animation/story that I am entirely writing and animating in my pirated Powerpoint programm)#Do not ask me how it works for it took me 2 weeks to finish the current 8 slides (because of University etc)#And also do not ask me why I am using Powerpoint #Frame by Frame animations drive me insane (and I have no software to actually do that in) and I don't know how to work blender yet #Ahem anyway #My actual tags now #Uhhhh #Robots #robot oc #ocs #... Skull?#Man I don't know how am I supposed to tag this #tender and loving affection for your dead and long gone creator but you are a robot/program that only gained sentience after their death #How about that huh #(first one to correctly guess the two things the design for the robot was inspired by gets. A cookie. Two cookies... My lemoncake recipe)#digital art

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m00ngbin · 7 months

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i lied. i dont actually like sex. put your clothes back on. im going to explain to you how one weird little kid changed the lives of tons of people for the better and at the end of of the series everyone he's helped and changed comes back to help him and return the favor. Let me explain to you the parallels between each of their arcs with the last few episodes. Let me tell you about how his brother finally realizes that it was all him. Every part of that kid is him and they all need to learn to live with it and accept and love him and help him not repress himself because that's what caused the problem in the

first place. Let me rant about how his friend/one-sided rival uses what he said when they first met back to him. (about not using powers to hurt other people) Let me scream about how the friend's first fight with him and last fight are direct parallels. Let me scream about how he shows how much that boy has changed him by opting to protect civilians instead of himself. I'm going to tell you about how after the former terrorist he saved finally realizes that instead of sacrificing himself to save the city he should survive and be there for his son and try to make amends and continue to be better. Let me talk about how even though the people he works out with KNOW that really they're no match for him and they don't really know what's going on, they still try to help him anyways. Because they're friends. That's what friends do and they love him. They just want to support him in every way they can. Let me scream and cry about how his mentor, the man he's known the longest, the man he trusts the most in the world finally admits that he lied to him and he's been lying to him and he finally tells the truth and that's exactly what that boy needs. He needed the truth. It shocked him back to reality, and everyone he's talked to up until that point, INCLUDING HIMSELF, shows him that everyone loves him, and they all accept him, the only problem is that he's unable to accept himself. He's been refusing to forgive himself since he was a little kid for something he didn't even mean to do, and he's been repressing and hiding important parts of himself because he's afraid. And he doesn't need to be afraid because he has people that are there for him and they all love him. LET ME THROW THE BIGGEST FIT YOUVE EVER SEEN WHILE I EXPLAIN TO YOU JUST HOW IMPORTANT THAT TALK BETWEEN HIM AND THE PART OF HIMSELF HES BEEN TRYINF TO REPRESS IS AND HOW MUCH IT CHANGED HIM. HE FINALLY ACCEPTS HIMSELF FOR WHO HE IS AND HES FINALLY ABLE TO FORGIVE HIMSELF AND MOVE ON AND GROW

#can you tell that this show actually means the world to me #and let me just say that while i understand that she wouldn't have been able to do anything i wish Tome had been there #shes also super important to the story and i wish that she'd been there too #AND LET ME ALSO SO HOW UTTERLY UPSET I AM THAT SERIZAWA DIDNT SAY ANYTHING UNTIL PROBABLY AFTERWARDS #SERIZAWA WAS THE FIRST AND ONLY PERSON TO TRULY UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING SHIGEO HAD GONE THROUGH #HE WAS THE ONLY ONE TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE MOGAMI INCIDENT #HE WAS THE ONLY ONE AND IT BREAKS MY HEART THAT THEY NEVER HAD A MOMENT #anyways i get why it didnt happen but i wish they had gotten to have a little moment together #anyways special shoutout to the seventh divison guys i didnt mention that were working at the store #sorry to sakurai and koyama i would have absolutely mentioned you too but my hand is getting tired and you werent there for very long #but i will say something now #i love how seriously they take protecting the store. even if they werent able to save it from destruction #it really goes to show how they took what reigen said to heart and tried as hard as possible to live normal average lives #they were willing to protect that store at the cost of their own safety just because they were so thankful for the chance to be normal #so sick over everyone in this show #sorry guys #had to get this out #AND I COULD WRITE MORE #but my hand is getting tired again

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