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saintslewis · 3 months

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❝ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐒 | 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒 ❞

pairing: sir lewis hamilton x fem!journalist reader

summary: a lil joke thing i wanted to write because homeboy is bringing home the big bucks 🤭

warnings: just read 🫵🏽 this is a crack fic lol

saint’s team radio 🎀: don’t take this all too seriously 😭 hope y’all enjoy plus who know i’ll actually make it into a thing 🧍🏽‍♀️

tags: @alika-4466 @purplelewlew @exotic-iris13 @arshiyuh @mauvecherie-writes @yeea-nah @youre-sooooo-funny @louvrepool @queenshikongo3 @cherry2stems @httpsserene @motheroffae

Being an independent journalist in this sport wasn’t easy at all but only within the parameters of any paddock around the world as most journalists rarely agreed with you, being neutral about anything in f1 wasn’t your thing.

Speaking your mind as the race went on was what set you apart from the rest, along with your humour and your honesty towards drivers and team principals. Not to mention you were extremely biased, keeping your liking to three to five drivers but only one occupied your mind every time you think about him.

I think you know who I’m talking about.

Your support for Lewis goes back to 2015, discovering the sport and immediately wanting to put your journalism skills to the test, aiming for the f1 paddock to at least catch a glimpse of the most talked about driver. Quickly building up a blog and several other social media accounts, you got to telling the world your thoughts and feelings for every race and your supporters rooted for you to achieve your goal.

Having the opportunity to attend thee race in 2020 as a guest of F1, you arrived at the Turkish Grand Prix with your head held high and a dress so gorgeous that it sparked rumours between you and the driver you were writing about. Not to mention the hug he gave you when you first met in the Mercedes garage, praising and thanking you for the support over the years. He’s been watching you and your work. That made your heart so warm.

Then he won his 7th world championship, breaking all records and that day, he deemed you his lucky charm.

And since then, it’s been a work wife-work husband friendship between you two. Fans constantly shipping you too, the clips of your shared interviews at the media pen of the intense eye contact and even off-track sightings once in a while such as a quick lunch.

yourusername • 13 mins ago

The atmosphere in Australia was unlike anything you’ve ever seen in your career, the paddock was practically painted red, Ferrari red to be specific. Everyone eager for Lewis to arrive as his first season as a driver for the legendary team.

Deciding to subtly support him and his new team, you rocked maroon everything, not yet ready to fully embrace the extreme bright red. It just might be your new favourite colour, from your hair right down to the tips of your high heeled boots.

Whilst setting your camera equipment up (gracefully given to you by Ferrari themselves), you couldn’t help but reminisce back to the year before of when he told you he was leaving Mercedes, a single facetime call in the nighttime.

“You made me pause the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, this better be good.” You said, placing the popcorn bowl down on your coffee table. Giving him squinted eyes, he just smiled at you.

“Are you alone right now?” He asked and that set aback for a bit. “You tryna do something funny, Lewis? Because you’re in Monaco right now and I’m at my house.” You raised your eyebrow at him, hiding how nervous you were to even suggest that to him but thankfully, he took it as a joke.

“No no, I’ve got some big news and I wanted to tell you before it gets out.” He replied, seeing how you stood up and placed your phone on your kitchen counter to prepare for this. “Okay, I’m ready. What’s up?” You clasped your hands together, not prepared to hear what came out of his mouth next.

“I’m moving to Ferrari next year.”

“You’re lying.” And all he did was smile as he saw your face drop at this news. He shook his head and that woke you to run around your apartment screaming. Running back to your phone, he was still there but just laughing his lungs out.

“Give me the details right now or else I’ll fly there. I’m not playing, Lew.”

A small smile was plastered on your face as you racked through the memories of that night and till that day, you still couldn’t believe it even though it was right in front of you. The media pen became louder and louder as you continued to mic yourself up along with connecting the mic to the camera and you immediately knew who caused the stir.

He already had such an aura surrounding him so much so that you could feel him whenever he entered the room. You were aware he arrived earlier and most likely changed but seeing the official team shirt on him was odd but fitting.

Lewis had a simple routine whenever he got to the media pen: everyone else then you because his time with you could be lengthened and he was so damn grateful that it was a Thursday because it meant even more time just walking around the paddock pretending it’s an interview when really, you guys were just spending time together.

After all the drivers had their interviews with you, laughing as they walked away because of some joke you told or happy that you asked different questions than everyone else. The man of the hour strolled over to your section with a look in his eye that gave you a shiver down your spine.

“Do not give me that look, Lewis. It’s weird seeing you in that shirt.” You said as he leaned against the barricade, maintaining eye contact with you. “I’m just taking in the red on you, it’s your colour.” He smirked at the reaction from you, the slight shock from the tone of his voice.

There was always a tad bit of tension between the two of you, feeling that twinge of a spark whenever he merely touched you. As you worked with over the years, you wanted your crush on him to diminish because that would just be unprofessional but he did not seem to care. At all. Often being spotted at various places together that he claimed were just two friends hanging out but just one look from him could have you in the clouds of days.

“Uh..huh. Wanna get these questions done or you wanna keep staring?” You asked with sass, watching him tilt his head a little and maintaining eye contact. “We can go right ahead, Y/n.” Lewis replied and you knew this was going to be a long interview.

Several questions later with a bunch of tension that you were sure the viewers would catch, you discreetly turned the camera to ask one of your infamous unserious questions that you did with every driver and you were sure this one were to get a laugh out of Lewis.

Holding the little card in front of you, you grinned with your left eye closing slightly more than the other. “It’s one of my favourite parts of any interview, unserious question time.” You said. “How unserious are we speaking here?” He asked with the slightest grin on his face just admiring you do your job.

“Only if you promise to answer it.” You said, holding out your manicured pinkie finger and Lewis hooked his with yours, solidifying the promise. “Okay okay, the whole world was shocked on how much Ferrari wanted you so much so that they literally doubled your salary.” You started.

“It’s now sitting at a hundred million a year. My question to you is who you gonna share it with and will it be me?”

“If you’re being serious, then it can be you.” He smiled and in that moment, your stomach dropped.

“Carl Davidson, I’m not playing around. Are you being for real?” You asked, lowering your voice so that no one could hear a thing.

He leaned in a bit more to whisper his next answer. “As real as you meeting me later on for dinner.” Lewis faced you then winked, walking away with your face still in shock. After standing there for what felt like forever, you felt your phone vibrate with a text from the man himself.

lew <3

you look gorgeous in red btw

yourusername

liked by theestallion, f1wags and 43,747 others

yourusername “anything you want, princess” — lewis hamilton.

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user give me your game card

user you’re eating the red wig DOWN

spinzbeatsinc oh for him to buy me a g wagon

yourusername you already have one???

user you gold digging bitch

user no ways 😭

user not you using him for his money

user think about it, what is he gonna do with so much??

fan she got the chance and she took it, i gotta respect it

user i hope this is a hard launch because i’ve been shipping these two for YEARS

user me too!!

lewishamilton just say the word 🫡

yourusername 🤭🤭🤭🤭

saint’s team radio (again) 🎀: hope you all enjoyed! again, this is like a crack fic lol. there’s so many stories that’ll be released soon i’m excited 🥹 okay bye!

#saint writes #lewis hamilton x black reader #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton fanfics #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fic #f1 x black!reader #f1 imagines #f1 x you #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #SoundCloud

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mixelation · 26 days

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Im someone who doesn't usually go for crack ships, but I gotta say , you kinda sold me on Minato/Sasuke.

They're like the literal opposite of each other and can come together to become something worse.

It's perfect

Also, the reactions will be hilarious.

Esp Itachi, assuming this happens before his death

Because knowing his micromanaging over controlling obsessive behavior over his brother, he will want to butt in and have an opinion. And I really want to know what that opinion is.

i think if you want, just, truly, the most INSANE reactions from everyone possible, it should be:

sasuke on his "murder itachi" roadtrip, age 16-17

"recently time traveled from the war frontlines" minato, late teens (17-19 range?)

i want minato to be good enough with hiraishin that he's super fucking lethal, but he hasn't met his genin team yet, he's never even considered having kids, he doesn't know he's supposed to grow up to be hokage, and he's literally been at war his entire ninja career. this is a minato open to insane decisions, and also no one currently around has any particular sway over him based on a pre-established relationship (except maybe jiraiya? but he's about to die)

obito immediately loses his mind. he thinks he can Pull Some Shit by presenting evidence for the uchiha conspiracy-- and minato IS disturbed, but also did you know minato left a hiraishin marker on obito? why would this timeline's minato do that if he weren't an enemy? after all, obito has THEE most rancid vibes. no way he was a beloved ally minato was trying to protect. die. :)

obviously now minato has to go look up the uchiha brothers though. and he finds sasuke first :)

#ninja nonsense #minasasu

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str0l0gy · 1 year

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DISASTER INC. — SIM JAEYUN

IN WHICH Hybe High School’s (HHS) gossip account is notoriously known for spreading false rumors about everyone affiliated with HHS. Sim Jake & Hwang Y/N: in the honor roll, athletic, award-winning students; both have so much in common, but don’t have the best… relationship with each other, to say the least. The way everybody knows that none of them want anything to do with each other has given them the image of Thee Enemies. What happens when they fall as one of HYBE NEWS’ victims? Both of their image take a 180 degree turn; from the two captains that despise each other to the cute couple that everyone ships. More & more rumors start to form around them & the only way to stop this is by finding the owner of HYBE NEWS Twitter account.

GENRE ! smau + written, crack, fluff, angst, academic rivals, enemies to friends to lovers, fake dating, highschool!au, non-idol!au

FEATURING ! ENHA’s hyung line + riki, karina AESPA, yunjin & eunchae LE SSERAFIM, soul P1H, haerin NWJNS, my OCs

WARNINGS & DISCLAIMERS ! ignore time stamps, bad humor, kys/death jokes, profanity, they’re all in their senior year, underage drinking, drama!

TAGLIST ! open 🫂

PROFILES VOLLEY HOES ! | CITYBOIZ | JUNIORS

ONE. where’s the job at?

TWO. shapeshifter era

THREE. deserved

FOUR. whose goddamn aunty?

FIVE. best plan ever

SIX. the movement

SEVEN. oh word?

EIGHT. snow white

…

#❝ DISASTER INC.#enhypen #kpop #enhypen x reader #enhypen fluff #fluff #angst #jake sim #jake sim smau #jake sim fanfic #enhypen smau #enhypen fanfiction

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punkeropercyjackson · 21 days

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Percy's interests i'm finally posting like i've been meaning to since i asked @keladeinos for a moodboard of them for our matching Pjo brainrot giggles

Blue.Just in general,in things and as a concept

Video games.He uses an emulator and buys all her consoles and games secondhand on anti-capitalist principal and his favorites are Animal Crossing,Night In The Woods,the Slenderman franchise and Fortnite

Cats.He's transfem(bigender + she/he/a bunch of neos)so she's a catgirl and her design makes her look like a tuxedo cat

Kidcore,legos included.Autistic swagger and coping mechanism combo

Alt music.Punk rock is her fave obviously(glamrock Percy?No?Just me?Alr)but her favorite band is Mcr and she's a massive The True Lives Of The Fabulous Killjoys fan(Mike Milligram just like him fr)but she also loves rap and Megan Thee Stallion is one of her biggest idol's

The sea but this ain't about Poseidon,it's all Sally and he actually ruined it for him for a hot sec until he learned to reclaim it for himself and his egg cracking gave her a lot of room to make her gender thanks to how much femininity the sea offers(mermaids and sirens,pearl and seashell jewelry,the moon controlling the tides,ships being called 'she',the term 'Beach Bunny',etc).Her favorite are sharks obviously and she has a secondhand bought Aquapet

Energy drinks.She drinks only the blue flavors and her faves are Cotton Candy Bang and Gfuel

Child care.It's canon he's a Team Parent because how he treats younger demigods(Tyson-Not technically a demigod but ykwim,Bianca,Nico,Hazel)and he loves kids in general as seen with Estelle so he becomes the Camp Director during summer and would have it as a college major if he went

The Superfam.The only time she's ever mentioned a superhero is Clark Kent by saying Jason looks like Superman so i mean?????

And for Marvel she only cares about Spiderverse(including Spidey and His Amazing Friends),comics X-Men and Gwenpool.Gwen Stacy and Hobie Brown are her favorite Spiderpeople based off relatability and adoptability

Anarchy.It's unironically one of her special interest's and i say this only mostly as a joke(she also has a battle jacket obviously and knows how to diy things that don't exist,she's solarpunk in addition to crustpunk)

And not a hobby technically but his type is princess-y black women.The first time he ever described a female character his age as attractive it was saying Annabeth has princess hair and she's played by Leah Jeffries now,Rachel is a girlypop and widely headcanoned as nigerian yoruba and Andromeda was the princess of Ethiopia so the shoe certainly hits

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spenglersglasses · 29 days

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🎙️Now I know you're asking yourself, 2 chapters in one day? ❤️‍🔥

Well yup that's right... don't get used to it. I just got on a stride and could literally not control myself...

⚠️ FLASH WARNING⚠️

Anyways once again a few disclaimers/reminders before we begin!

While I know it is canon that Alastor is asexual, in this fic he has a rare sexual attraction that develops for a certain someone in particular and is NOT aromatic. If this is something that bothers you or if you are not a fan of the Alastor/Charlie ship (Charlastor/RadioBelle) then this is not one for you my fellow smut enjoyers.

If you aren't bothered then be prepared, this will be a wild ride!

Also, when Alastor has moments of "glitching" or that infamous radio cracking to his voice, his speech will look like this (Ĝ͎͍͓͌͠l̡̟̩͍̐̐̕͞ì͓̞̗̜̇̿͝ẗ̼c̬̮̹̔̒́h͚͇́̓ ̙͕̮̣̎͑͛̚s̟͇̽͞p̫͉͆̈e̡͇͉͐̑̊e̻͞c͙͇̆̏h̺̗̭̙̑̓̄͝), I will be making a note of what is being said, so those who have a harder time can understand it, but I thought it was an awesome effect lol.

*Special shoutout to @animatedglittergraphics-n-more for the GLITCH dividers!

Now without further ado!

D̢͙̯̦̙͎̎̽̇̔̾͊̿̚͜͟A̜̱̫̭̽̌̔̄R̫̬͊̈̊͜Ļ̮̗̲̤͎̙̅͒̿͒̿͊͡Í̱̮͑́͢͜͠N͔̗̘͈̲̤̳̉̅̉̀͗̔͠͝ͅG̢̻̱͐́̆͜͠

(Hazbin Hotel)

When Alastor made a deal with Charlie Morningstar, he knew it was a chance for him to ascend the ranks. Now that it's been weeks since the events of the extermination battle, Alastor decides it's time to collect…what he didn't expect was to slowly fall for the Princess of Hell. But hey, a deal's, a deal.

Chapter 3: Put Your Head on My Shoulder

Also available HERE on AO3. Haven't started yet? Beginning HERE on AO3!

Eventually will be NSFW below the cut!!

- FLASHBACK (7 Years ago) -

The winds snapped around him like lashes from a whip. Kissing and slicing into his skin, leaving marks of blood in their wake. A pattern of scars that would speak volumes. The great radio demon had managed to escape. Coming too close to meeting his end at the hands of that filthy screen-faced fuck.

Alastor was seething with rage. His powers had all but dwindled down to nothing, leaving the once power overlord defenseless. Thankful that he had at least been able to take his own pound of flesh from the head of the Vees, before fleeing for his life. Now, past the outskirts of Pentagram City, he found himself. Deep beyond the inner rings of Hell. Cast out into the bowels of which even Lucifer himself had long since abandoned.

“This can’t be happening.” he groaned, struggling just to continue on. Gradually his movements became slower. Like walking in quicksand, he struggled with every step until he was all but crawling along the ground. The sounds of screaming and radio signals crackling in his ears. And for the first time, Alastor felt truly helpless. It was then, in his most desperate hour, he heard HER voice again.

“Oh, poor sweet Alastor… what brings thee to my garden?” she asked, waiting for his response as she remained still hidden in the shadows.

No. Not now, Alastor pleaded inside, feeling the presence growing closer. Unable to leave, she manifested before him. Enormous and horrid, her mouth opening up to reveal her slithering tongue. Splicing itself into tentacles and covered in glowing eyes. Sprouting like sores on its spines as she came closer and closer.

The sight of her alone could destroy even the most robust of sinners. Like a mutation, colored in shades of black, red, and white she continued evolving—changing. Finally becoming fully formed as she reached Alastor. The radio demon, forcing himself to look up at her. The entity, now appearing as a rather normal looking woman.

Dark black hair, fading into crimson red, was long and luscious. Her beautiful face, partially obscured beneath a wide-brim black hat. She was imposing to look at. Her Long, red overcoat flowing in the hellish winds. Endless chains coming from the depths of her coats. Emerging from its checkered pattern of black and white, spreading out into the abyss and traveling to Alastor.

“My favorite pet… Seems we have run into a bit of trouble. Tsk tsk.” she taunted. Alastor’s smile flickering into a snarl for a moment before he spoke.

“Roo! Fancy seeing you here. I—” he struggled, coughing up blood as his radio wave effect crackled in and out. His chest still aching from his wounds and his powers holding on for dear life before he finally collapsed onto the ground. The shadows and spirits he commanded, spinning around him with nowhere to go. Roo smiled, squatting down beside him. Taking Alastor’s chin in her hands and raising his gaze up to meet her.

“Poor Alastor, letting the TV bother you again I see. You know I can’t have that… after all who else would bring me such delicious souls if not for you.” she hummed, her otherworldly tongue coming out to swirl over his cheek. Alastor knew she wouldn’t let him off that easily. They had made a pact when Alastor first arrived in Hell. The newly deceased sinner, confused and bloodied from his fall into the pit when he saw Roo had been waiting.

Somehow, she knew he was coming. Standing by in the darkness, watching for him—ready to offer the once proud New Orleans radio host, turned serial killer, an opportunity he would never be able to refuse. Her wicked hand, held out to him, tendering him the chance to become Hell’s greatest overlord. To continue his work started on the Earthly plane.

All Alastor had to do was agree that every soul who had fallen short of his debts, she’d be allowed on them. Alastor would have full control of the rest, using them, and his newly given powers, to ascend the ranks. To the ambitious and blood lusting Alastor it was a deal that was too good to be true. They shook on it, Alastor and Roo now bound until his death. Alastor, learning quickly that his deal would eventually lead to his death.

While the stipulations of their agreement had worked for a time, Roo quickly grew greedy. Trying to convince Alastor to go beyond the terms of their deal. Sending her souls when no breach of their contract was made. The sounds of overlords filling his radio waves as he slaughtered them, over and over again, began haunting the rings of Hell. So much so that the mere mention of his name incited fear in their souls.

HIs last attempt to feast on an overlord was Vox. The demon who had only nearly managed to escape, but not without first taking his swing at the radio demon. Now Alastor was hanging on by a thread. Looking into Roo’s soulless eyes and wondering if this was truly the end or if in exchange for more time, an even more binding deal would be necessary.

After all, Roo was in fact the root of all Evil. Feeling as though she were equal, but opposite to God than Lucifer himself. A position she clutched tightly enough to bleed.

“I was so close.” Alastor stammered. His voice, weak and pathetic. It was a rare sight to see. If she were being honest, it tickled Roo to see him that way. She still needed him, however and their deal together was still very much not done. There was still more to gain from him, and Roo was never satisfied.

Alastor suddenly felt like he could expand his lungs. A cold rush flowing through him and the pain, beginning to disappear and he had begun healing. His loyal shadow and souls, pulling themselves back inside him. The greenlight of his power radiating brightly once more. He felt refreshed—alive.

“See now. All better.” Roo said smugly. Watching as Alastor rose up from the ground, ready to slaughter anyone who stood in his way. “Remember Alastor, you owe me.” she smiled. Winking at the radio demon. Before he could speak, he found himself somehow back in Pentagram City.

A bit dazed and confused, he strolled down the streets just as he did before. Ready to rumble once again with Vox, after some careful planning, when he noticed that another extermination had already begun. Alastor, wondering to himself why it was happening again soon. Wasn’t only a few days ago that the angels descended to Hell, he asked himself. Sauntering over to Cannibal Town, where he managed to find a calendar hanging on the wall at Rosie’s favorite butcher shop.

When his eyes met with the date, his dials began spinning. Horns growing larger from his head in his panic. Making ungodly sounds that glitched and screeched loud enough to affect everyone traveling around him. Somehow, in the short time he felt he was with Roo, 7 years had passed.

- Present Day -

Charlie didn’t know why, but she found herself frantically running towards Alastor’s radio tower. Crying hard, the tears spilling with every step. Angry at Vaggie for her betrayal, but even more angry at herself, knowing that she was responsible. That she had in fact betrayed their relationship long before Vaggie’s indiscretion.

Slowly things had been driving a distance between them. Vaggie’s issues with the hotel, the revelation she was an angel—part of the extermination team to boot, and this thing with Alastor that Charlie couldn’t shake. All of it had been slowly pulling them apart and Charlie did nothing to stop it. Now here she was, running to the man who had stolen her affections.

Charlie’s heart was raw and bleeding. Her emotions had never been so overwhelming. When she finally reached the door, she began banging, hard and loud, until it swung open. Alastor, spinning around in his chair to see Charlie looking more distressed than ever before. A sight that had unexpectedly made him feel a flicker of worry and concern.

“Charlie! My dear, just in time for our little announcement.” Alastor beamed, rising up from the chair before coming to greet her. Charlie took one look at Alastor, standing there with what she hoped was a genuinely happy smile and hoping it was for her, when she rushed towards him.

“Alastor.” she cried, quickly burying her face into his shoulder. Alastor was taken back, finding himself unable to let go of her. Wrapping his arms around her as the princess sobbed against his coat. The sound of her cries, making him feel an unexpected pity—even sympathy for her.

“What’s wrong sweetheart?” he asked, the words feeling odd as they fell from his lips. However odd it seemed; he still meant them. Charlie, looking up at him. Her eyes, full of sadness and pain.

“Vaggie… she… I… we…” Charlie cried, feeling Alastor unexpectedly pulling her in even closer. Both Alastor and Charlie, unable to deny feeling one another’s heartbeats. Their rhythm, matching each other’s intensity. Wondering to themselves, if the other was feeling it too.

“Shhh…” he said, patting the top over her head, “...it doesn't matter anymore.” he assured her. Charlie felt a smile tugging on her face just as Alastor pulled her off by the shoulders. Looking her dead in the eye. “Now my dear bride-to-be… I suggest we keep the details of our nuptials between us. Heaven knows what kind of madness that might cause for your family. You know should it be revealed that you had just… owed me one.” Alastor chuckled.

He was right. The situation was bad enough without having everyone in Hell knowing all the gorey details. Charlie nodded her head in response. Alastor smiled, taking a hold of his microphone cane and tapping it against his hand until he found his preferred frequency.

“We have a new journey to attend to.” Alastor assured her. Sending her a wink.

“Al… what are you?” Charlie began, Alastor placing a finger to her lips. The sound of his laughter ringing out all over Pentagram City.

“Salutations my fellow sinners. Today is a special day indeed. I know you have all been waiting oh so—patiently for the new broadcast. So without too much more suspense… I thought we might open things with a bang or should I say a bell. Wedding bells.”

The broadcast was sent out all over. Heard by everyone within the city—every sinner, demon, overlord, imp, and hellhound. All of them Wondering what the fuck the radio demon was going on about. Their answer came fast when before they knew it, Alastor asked Charlie to join him on the mic. Their ears piqued as they waited with bated breath.

“...It’s about time I settled down. Asking my beautiful, darling Charlotte Morningstar for her hand… so whaddya say Charlie, will you marry me?” Alastor asked her. The broadcast, finding its way to Lucifer who was halfway across the city in his palace. Spitting out his food when he heard what Alastor had to say. The king of Hell swatting a stack of rubber ducks across the room. Feeling like his skin was crawling at the news. Immediately searching for his phone to call Charlie. Thinking that he’d be well on his way to stopping this soon.

Back at the tower Charlie began fidgeting with her hands. “Um… uh….” she mumbled. Stalling for time while she battled herself inside. The will of her heart and mind at odds.

She knew what she had to do, this bit was all just for show. Neither one of them wanted the rest of Hell to know the truth. The stench of it wouldn’t be good on either of them. Charlie swallowed back her reservations and looked over to Alastor. “Yes. I will marry you.”

The town was in an uproar. The conversation on everyone’s lips was only about the enigmatic couple. “Oh, I had no idea they were an item.” said one of the sinners who had stopped on the street beside a hellhound in the Pride ring. Another in the Lust ring, mentioning that they were actually perfect for one another if everyone thought about it. There was no escaping it now, everyone would know now.

In Cannibal Town, an engagement celebration had begun. The crowd, cheering at the news of their delightful princess and Alastor getting ready to tie the knot. Rose, however, was sitting quietly on her veranda. Munching on a few lady fingers, when the broadcast caught her attention. “Hmm… Alastor, just what are you up to?” she asked herself.

The news had even reached the depths of V Tower. Vox was sitting in his office, feet propped up as he casually watched 666 News while going over some plans. Suddenly anchor Katie Killjoy came on the screen. His attention was captured.

“Thanks for nothing Tom, and now for more amusing news… Seems everyone’s favorite radio demon overlord and the princess of Hell are set to tie the knot. While no details have been disclosed at this time. You can be sure we will keep you up to date on their upcoming nuptials.” she reported, a glimmer of sarcasm and resentment present in her tone.

The screens around him began shorting out. Glitching and pixelating, covering them completely from left to right. Vox began digging his fingers into the control console. How? Why?

“Alastor and fucking Charlotte Morningstar?!” he raged, instantly coming to the conclusion that Alastor was making a power play. “That motherfucker!” Vox said, ripping one of the screens off the wall. Tossing it out into the hall just as Velvette had been walking towards him. Cautiously peeking her head in the door frame, noticing Vox’s bad mood. Velvette, relishing a chance to worsen it further.

“Hmm… What's up your ass now?” she asked. Vox practically heaving, desperately wanting to taste Alastor’s blood.

“That noisy little fuck has managed to convince Lucifer’s daughter to marry him.” he growled. Velvette, cocking an eyebrow at him before laughing her head off.

“Jealous?” she asked him, a big smirk on her face. Vox was ready to tear her throat out but tried his best to compose himself.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” he growled.

“Let him have her. Why the fuck should we care?” Velvette asked, refusing to let the news ruffle any of her feathers. Vox clearly wasn’t going to be satisfied with that answer. Angry that Alastor had managed to come up with yet another way to gain power. Thinking to himself that there was no way the princess and him were actually in love.

“Because it gives him more control, you idiot.” Vox began, knowing he had to do something to put a stop to it. “Wonder how things will blow over once they are exposed for the frauds they are. Maybe that outdated, crackling son of bitch will be held accountable.” Vox mused.

“Just what do you have in mind?” Velvette asked him. The TV screens, all beginning to flash with images of Alastor and Charlie. Then images that appeared like they were from cameras surveilling the city. The system, bouncing from image to image, trying to locate the two of them. Vox, laughing maniacally before answering.

“You will see. Everyone will see.”

Charlie left the radio tower with unexpected butterflies in her belly. Her head, still however, screaming at her to run. Struggling with herself and the right thing to do. Just as the broadcast had ended, as if On cue, came the call from her father. Lucifer, insisting she get her “royal ass” down to the palace before he’d find a way to shut down the hotel. She knew he would be angry, how could he not, but not this angry.

Alastor and her father were oil and water. There was no way he was going to accept this marriage without a fight. Charlie, deciding to do her best to convince him. Gathering up her courage and putting on a brave face. Hoping that between the hotel and her father’s house, she could come up with a believable enough excuse for him to let it go. A tall order indeed. Just as she stepped outside, she immediately bumped into someone.

The impact, sending them down to the ground. Charlie panicked, reaching out her hand for them to take. Feeling stupid for having not seen them when she noticed the hint of wings beneath the person’s silver cloak—It was Emily.

“Emily! Oh, shit I’m sorry. What are you doing here?” Charlie asked, hoisting the angel up from the ground and helping to brush her off.

“Charlie, it’s so good to see you again! I was coming to talk to you about something, but gosh I just overheard some of your… um… people… saying that you are getting married?!” the angel smiled, her eyes shining with anticipation and excitement.

“Oh ah… yeah that's right. Alastor and I. Who knew.” Charlie laughed nervously. Emily jumped at her, arms quickly flying around Charlie’s shoulders as Emily squeezed her tightly in a hug.

“Oh gosh, that is such wonderful news and oh man I am so sorry to bug you while you are planning… but I need to speak with you.” she continued, her face turning a bit more serious than before.

“What's wrong? Has heaven decided that—” Charlie began before Emily cut her off. The smile on her face, now practically sparkling.

“Your friend, Sir Pentious… he is with us in Heaven! He has been absolved Charlie, you did it!” she explained. This time Charlie grabbed hold of Emily.

“What?! Are you sure?!” she asked, almost shaking the poor angel in her excitement. Rejoicing and crying as the smile on her face grew wide enough to rival even Alastor’s.

“It’s true he arrived a while ago. He’s proof that the sinners can be redeemed!” Emily grinned.

“How? I mean I know how. Fucking Hell we did it!” Charlie cheered, the excitement sending her head spinning. She felt the need to sit down for a moment. “Wait Emily… How come you are just now telling me? It’s been months now… I have been waiting for another letter and nothing…” Charlie asked.

“Oh Charlie, that's why I had to come see you in person. Someone has been intercepting our letters. I don't know who, but I have it on good authority it’s one of Adam’s crew. Don't you worry though, I plan on getting to the bottom of it.” Emily assured her. “I have to go now before anyone gets suspicious, but keep your head up girl, you got this!.”

“Thank you.” Charlie said as Emily disappeared into thin air. The news was powerful, just what Charlie needed to feel better about everything that had happened between Vaggie and Alastor. While she wished she had time to go wake everyone up and scream their success from the rooftop, there was still the matter of attending to her Father. The boss of Hell was waiting impatiently for his daughter’s arrival. Charlie would do well not to keep him waiting.

By mid-afternoon Angel and Husk had managed to stumble out of bed. Husk, going straight back to minding the bar as Angel slumped over the sofa in the parlor. The night had proven to be quite enjoyable, the two of them finally consummating their affections, that up until now Husk had been loath to admit. The former cat overlord, softening up to the porn star with a big heart after all.

Angel began flipping through the TV channels. Sending Niffty off to grab him a bite to eat and occasionally making lewd comments at Husk, when he caught a repeat of Katie Killjoy’s segment. Angel’s mouth dropped to the floor. Dumbstruck with the words he had just heard from outta the old cunt’s mouth.

They had missed Alastor’s special broadcast. Too hungover, and blissfully snoozing, after a night of unbridled passion to have listened. “Well fuck me.. You hearin’ this shit whiskers?” Angel asked, jolting up off from his spot and over to the bar.

“I told you not to call me that… Already up my ass after one night.” Husk huffed under his breath, a slight smile peeking out from beneath his annoyance.

“I believe you were up my ass schnookums, but seriously we got a problem. Charlie and Smiles are getting hitched. That’s gotta be a joke right?” Angel asked, cringing at the thought.

“Charlie’s in love with Alastor.” Niffty chimed in, handing Angel over his sandwich and climbing up to sit on the bar. Husk insincerely smiled, pushing her gently off the side of the bar. Niffty scurrying off somewhere they didn’t care to know.

“My money is on Charlie getting herself into some deep shit.” Husk commented. “He’s no good. I don’t have a good feeling about this.”

“What are we gonna do?” Angel asked, Husk letting out a sigh. Resigning himself to having to help figure things out once again.

“Let’s go talk to her.” he suggested, ready to round the bar and head upstairs. Taking Angel with him to Charlie’s room, when Niffty shot out in front of him. Halting them two of them mid-stride.

“Charlie is out! Left this morning after the broadcast.” she informed them. Husk, face palming hard as he tried to quickly formulate a plan.

”Nift, you keep watch over the hotel. Me and…Pookie are gonna go find our Princess.” Husk said. Niffty, nodding in response. With that Husk and Angel left to find her. Unbeknownst to them, Alastor had been lurking in the shadows. Over hearing their little conversation and beginning to wonder himself where Charlie had run off too.

Deciding that he should be keeping a closer eye on her just in case. Having the budding need to protect her, when suddenly a thought hit him. If Charlie was out and the news about their wedding was going around like wildfire, surely someone who wanted to get at him might take the opportunity to use her against him. Instantly the radio demon fled from the hotel, determined to try and find Charlie before anyone else.

Charlie was strolling down the center of Pentagram City, ready to have a one on one with her dad. Hoping to convince him that she and Alastor were a real couple. Knowing all too well that things were far from the fantasy romance she had spun in the deep recesses of her mind. As she walked, the residents of the city stopped to talk with her.

Well wishes and congratulations, coming from all around. Her people, seeming to be truly happy for her. If only she could be happy too. It wasn’t very long into her journey, when she reached the road that would lead her to her father’s. Unexpectedly finding herself face to face with Vox as she turned the corner. The one overlord she knew Alastor absolutely detested above all others.

While she had hoped to avoid him, it was too late. He had caught sight of her, yelling her name from across the street. Bringing with him a flood of press from 666 News and other outlets. Cameras and reporters coming out of the woodwork to surround them. Charlie, wondering if Vox had planned this, knowing that it most likely had. Nothing would make him happier than finding a way to get to Alastor.

“Charlie! Ms. Morningstar! I hear congratulations are in order. What are you doing all this way without your… handsome beau?” Vox asked, practically choking on the words.

“I ah… well…” Charlie tried to answer, tapping her pointer fingers together. Overwhelmed with all the flashing lights and cameras in her face. Vox was never happier, grinning as he saw how flustered and upset she had become. It was only a matter of time before he’d get the truth out of her.

“Tell us Charlie… is it true that you and Alastor have been making it all up?” one reporter asked. Charlie’s eyebrows raised and her teeth clenched as she wanted to scream back at them.

“There have been reports that the marriage is a sham, can you comment?” another reporter asked.

“No that's not… I…” she said, trying to think of something to say. Something that had more weight than just telling them it was real, that it wasn’t just for show. Words that maybe could even convince her it was true.

“Please… come on you guys. Of course Charlie and Alastor aren’t faking their romance.” Vox said, his face and demeanor suggesting otherwise. It was about that time that Lucifer had come looking for his daughter. Every television had his little princess plastered on every channel. She was in trouble and he knew it.

By the time he reached her, so had Angel and Husk. All three of them, unable to get to her from behind the hordes of press that had encircled her and Vox. It was clear that this had all been a set up. Lucifer, Husk, and Angel, Watching poor Charlie becoming more and more panicked as the press berated her and there was nothing they could do.

Lucifer had had enough, pushing through the crowd. Only getting about half way to Charlie when out of nowhere Alastor materialized beside her. His tentacles and horns on full display. The crowd that had been keeping her captive, backing off in terror before the radio demon came back into his usual form. Standing beside Charlie as he took her hand in his.

Instantly Charlie felt breathless. Was Alastor actually holding her hand? What other choice did they have if they were going to keep up the facade. The small gesture was enough to send her heart pounding once again. Alastor speaking to address Vox and the rest of the crowd.

“Oh Vox, Y̲͐Ŏ͈̮͡U̅ͅ ̡̜͘͠A̧̩̻̻̓͌̏̓̚͟N͉͓͂̋N͕̚O̢̘̬̬̎̑̐͡Y͍̼͒͗͊͜I̹̾N̗̰̝̪̩̈́͑̓͊̕G͖̰̐̉ ̜͉͇͕̊̊̇̾̏͢L̗̜̩͈̱̒̏̚͡͞Ȋ̳Ť͓̱̼̑̆T̙̣̮͈͔́̂̑͛̀Ḷ͎͑́E ̢͉̎̃F̢̦̰͉͉̀̾̇̌͠Ȗ̺C̨͕͋͘͟͡K͚͖͙̅̾̒̅͟. You have been such a poor reporter. Maybe staying in your tower is more suitable for your talents.” he snapped, sending a devilish grin Vox’s way. The overlord, wanting so badly to punch Alastor’s smug face. He knew this might be the only chance he may get to screw him over. It was now or never.

“Well Alastor, if the two of you are so IN LOVE… why don’t you prove it?” Vox hissed. Both Alastor and Charlie, frightened by being called out on their bluff. They had to do something to prove it, but what? Her father and friends, all watching, waiting—wondering what they would do next.

Just as Vox was beginning to feel that he had accomplished his goal, Charlie grabbed hold of Alastor’s coat. Pulling him close to her and pressing her lips to his. The crowd audibly gasped as their lips met. Alastor, too, was in shock. Finding it hard not to close his eyes to the feel of Charlie’s mouth on his.

Was Charlie enjoying this? Was he? Alastor wasn’t sure, but he met her half way—and more. Dipping her before the crowd. His willing tongue, sliding into her mouth with ease. Dancing along with hers in the most sincere kiss Charlie had ever felt before. The princess’s eyes, opening a moment in surprise before closing them once again. Both of them lost in the moment.

Alastor was wondering what had come over him. Never before had he felt this way with anyone, but when they kissed, it was undeniable. Something was happening to him. On the inside, Charlie too was overwhelmed, pretending that he felt for her what she felt for him. The crowd began cheering around them as the kiss was broadcasted across all the rings of Hell. Vox pissed off more than ever before as the two of them seemed to have foiled his plans once again.

Roo laughed, the radio waves having just reached her. The news of Alastor’s engagement to the princess of Hell was now on her radar. Roo, knowing that she would now more than ever, need to keep a close eye on Alastor. “Oh Alastor, just what are you up to?”

Notes:

Y̲͐Ŏ͈̮͡U̅ͅ ̡̜͘͠A̧̩̻̻̓͌̏̓̚͟N͉͓͂̋N͕̚O̢̘̬̬̎̑̐͡Y͍̼͒͗͊͜I̹̾N̗̰̝̪̩̈́͑̓͊̕G͖̰̐̉ ̜͉͇͕̊̊̇̾̏͢L̗̜̩͈̱̒̏̚͡͞Ȋ̳Ť͓̱̼̑̆T̙̣̮͈͔́̂̑͛̀Ḷ͎͑́E ̢͉̎̃F̢̦̰͉͉̀̾̇̌͠Ȗ̺C̨͕͋͘͟͡K͚͖͙̅̾̒̅͟- You annoying little fuck.

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gritsandbrits · 8 months

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So, i found out that there is a new crossover ship between tiana from the princess and the frog, and nanami from jjk... in my opinion it is stupidly adorable and i'm in the process of reading some of their fics.

¿What us your honest opinion on this ship? Keep un mind that this is coming from someone that don't see jjk.

I love it ok??? It's so refreshing to see a black woman in thee center of a popular crack ship and it's not creepy and weird.

#gb asks #tianami #tiana x nanami

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dont-f-with-moogles · 1 month

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hello 💫 drunk bestie ✨

prompt:

"you should see the other guy" (/girl/person/titan/whatever)

ship: soukoku or levihan

and i'll leave the vibe up to you (though i'd be partial to some angst bc you're so good at it, but really whatever you feel like). can't wait to see what you come up with! 😘

A Crack of Thunder Characters: Dazai, Chuuya, Sigma (Meursault sillies!)

A blurred cacophony of sounds reached Sigma’s ears before he could distinguish the source… there were voices arguing, though obscured as though their enraged tones were reaching him underwater. Then, a distant crack of thunder…

Sigma’s head fell forward; he was caught between sleep and wakefulness. His tongue lay parched and heavy. As he attempted to move it, he took the coating off the roof of his mouth.

“Mmm…” he managed groggily, opening an aching eyelid. The effort was akin to rousing himself from what felt like a month’s worth of sleep. When he finally did open his eyes, a small, white-walled room swam before him. And, standing in front of him was a man of a rather small stature with a shock of red hair beneath his black, pillbox hat.

“…tho… finally awake, theeping beauty?”

“Uh… sorry?” Sigma managed. The man let out a little huff of irritation.

“I thaid are you awake now-” Chuuya shook his head. “…know what? Never mind. We need to thake a leg…”

“…we need to what?” Sigma tilted his head, his white and lilac hair drifting over his hunched shoulder as he processed this unexpected interaction. “If… if you don’t mind me saying, your pronunciation is a little…”

“Thut it,” Chuuya seethed at him. “Think I don’t know that, you walking thcoop of ithe cream?”

Chuuya tried to still the trembling of his fists. Sensing a need to divert the conversation, Sigma decided to change tack.

“Is Dazai-”

“Thon of a bitch,” came Chuuya’s retort; his immediate response to the mention of his old partner’s name had become as instinctive as breathing. In answer to Sigma’s questioning gaze, Chuuya lifted his top lip with a gloved finger.

“Bathard thaid he had a quick way to get my fangth out…” he growled, “…uthed a motherfuckin wrench.”

Sigma inched closer, appalled to see the gap where Chuuya’s incisor had once been.

“Oh shit… I… I’m sure he was just trying to help…” the former casino manager fumbled, “…does it hurt?”

His new companion scowled.

“Yeah right. You thould thee the other guy.”

Wobbling as he climbed to his feet, Sigma peered over Chuuya’s shoulder. A pool of dark blood was spreading rapidly across the floor and, lying with his head submerged in it was…

“Dazai!” Sigma cried, turning his widened eyes to the man’s ex partner. Chuuya uttered a derisive snort.

“…tho what if I thot him in the head?” He laid a gloved hand upon his hip. “You think that wath wrong?”

Sigma, who had pressed his trembling fingers over his mouth, slowly began to lower them. He couldn’t believe that someone could speak so casually about such a brutal act of violence against an ally. Unless…

“Wait… you’re the gravity manipulator aren’t you?”

The casino manager’s legs gave way beneath him, forcing him to sink down on his seat once more. He gave a great sigh as his shoulders relaxed…

“…thank God. You must’ve stopped the bullet before it went through his skull, right?” he laughed shakily. Chuuya glanced back at Dazai’s body, lying prostrate on the ground, before he quickly looked away.

“Uh… thure I did…”

Chuuya forced a smile, revealing the gap in his teeth once more.

Bonus: “Anyway, at leathe he died doing what he loved…” Chuuya pronounced with feigned solemnity as he stowed his gun away.

“W-what?” Sigma gasped, apalled.

Chuuya shrugged.

“Dying.”

👉 Drunk Drabbles?

#what in the name of gratuitous violence is this?#😭#dazai osamu #chuuya nakahara #bsd sigma #skk #bsd skk #meursault #bungou stray dogs #bsd #my writing

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sitp-recs · 1 year

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hiiii what are the funniest, explicit fics in your opinion?

Hi anon! Oh I love myself some funny smut. I’ve definitely recced these many times before, they always crack me up:

Tense by Faith Wood (3k)

Harry and Draco have sex. Very, very slowly. Seriously, this is, like, 3K of penetration.

Ring of Fire by IvvyMoon (4.7k)

Draco gets a tattoo.

Never Gonna Give You Up by InnerLilith (5k)

Five times Harry rickrolls Draco and one time Draco gets him back.

Luckiest Fucking Size Queen Alive by @l0vegl0wsinthedark (6k)

Potter escorts me home, presses me into my front door and kisses me with a ferocity that’s exhilarating.

Up The by @shiftylinguini (7.5k)

“I feel I need to point out,” Draco kissed gently over Harry’s Adam’s apple, “that this is the most Gryffindor approach to conception that could possibly exist.”

Born Slippy by @dracoladon (8k)

Harry finds that it's less 'one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor' and more 'one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, decide Malfoy's quite fit, actually, and decent company after your friends traitorous abandonment, floor.' With Malfoy lying next to you.

Sex Ed for Aurors by curiouslyfic (9k)

Some things, you need to learn on the job.

The Full Monty by @magpiefngrl (10k)

Harry poses for a naked Auror calendar and Draco goes batshit crazy with lust.

Aural Gratification by birdsofshore (E, 11k)

Harry's not gay – he just likes listening to exciting stories about Aurors. It's not his fault that the narrator's voice is so smooth, so expressive... and really rather hot.

The Loathly Worm by Selden (12k)

When Draco Malfoy is forced to go undercover among the remaining Death Eaters in the aftermath of the war, the last person he expects to find there is Harry Potter.

An Act of Kindness for One Harry Potter by a Sympathetic Draco Malfoy by 0idontknow0 (15k)

As Draco leaned on the wall to wait for them to get dressed, he could not help feeling like he had done a very kind thing by disrupting them. Someone should give Potter a better rogering than that sorry sod had.

you look so fine by michi_thekiller (16k)

In which Draco is a Veela and Harry is his mate. Dark!Humor or Crack!Horror, you decide.

Stupid Love by @the-sinking-ship (17k)

Harry Potter, how does Draco Malfoy hate thee? Let me count the ways.

Potter’s Parselprostate (and the Chamber of Secrets) by @dictacontrion (17k)

Hogwarts’ future depends on Malfoy’s texts. Too bad the key is up Potter’s arse.

The Four Ds of Apparition (or: Destination, Determination, Deliberation, and Dicks) by @firethesound and @eidheann (36k)

After transferring to the Apparition Department, Harry's life becomes one big dick joke. And all his friends are arseholes. So is Malfoy, but what else is new? AKA Harry Potter and the eighteen twenty dicks.

#asks #anon #Drarry reclist #funny smut

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spikedru · 1 year

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xander and dracula is literally my favorite crack ship because i really enjoy the comedy of this kinda loser guy managing to land not only cordelia chase, anyanka patron saint of scorned women but also Thee count dracula. its fun to me :)

#also the superior xander/vampire ship idk what yall see in spander its Not it you guys

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tearofisha · 3 months

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Grave Digger.

In the infinite void, a planet ship drifted. Debris floated idly in space, the remnants of ships and cracked crystal domes that shone in the starlight like scattered jewels lost in the midst of a theft gone wrong. For over 300 years, the Craftworld drifted, alone and in the dark,another casualty of the galaxies genocide against itself until one day a portal flickered and a living Aeldari walked upon the Craftworld once more.

Rishaeron walked through the streets with equal numbness and reverence, clutching his rifle in tense hands and straining not to make a sound lest the ghosts of his people hear the footsteps of the lowly scavenger walking through their streets.

Despite his efforts to not look, he saw the casual horrors of war on a planetary scale in montage. The blown out ruins of support batteries with their crews scattered around them like broken teeth from a bar brawl. Wave Serpent and Falcon Grav tanks scorched with their killing blows still visible like an accusation toward their destroyer. A Wraithlord surrounded by a glut of humanity, the venerable Wraith construct with Ghostglaive skewered through the ground so that it remained kneeling even after death. So many others. But no pulse, no thrum that lay at the heart of living Craftworlds because both the Infinity Circuit and Avatar of Khaine were destroyed.

He descended further.

Passed now where only Exarchs and Farseers tread, Rishaeron saw the prize he was here to reclaim. Near the centre of the world, lay the remains of the Seer Council, Court of the Young King, and the fossilised ruin of the Avatar of Khaine, its roiling boiling visage still one of such deep and purposeful hate that Rishaeron could feel the blood in his own veins begin to simmer.

Kneeling before the now-statue of a once living God to his people, he removed his helmet, weapons and gazed up into the screaming face of death as if in prayer.

"Bloody Handed." He said evenly, aware that these were the first words spoken without his war mask on in weeks. "To thee my bloody undertakings are dedicated and with your gifts will your enemies be struck down."

The Ranger brushed some of the ash from the base of the slain Avatar onto his fingertips and drew them over his forehead before swiftly placing his war mask back on, the dread oath to the God of war and murder now made in the presence of a thousand thousand ghosts. He rose, and found the body of the Autarch nearest the chamber to the Infinity Circuit and in its hand was his quarry.

No words were spoken, and no judgement was given, but still a moments hesitation faded over Rishaeron. Of an entire destroyed Craftworld, every Spiritstone and refugee claimed that could be saved, this was the only treasure to be left behind. Deep in his bones, in the very soul that was Rishaeron Wayfinder, he knew that to take the sword was to cross a boundary he could never return to. He thought of Prince Yriel taking the Spear of Twilight, how Yriel knew such an action would condemn him but doing so to save his Craftworld. He was making no such valiant sacrifice. His sacrifice was to claim this blade in the name of vengeance and vengeance alone.

Rishaeron took a deep breath, wrapped his fingers around the hilt of the blade, and the Shard of Anaris was bequeathed from the hands of one dead warrior to another, sure to join them.

#rishaeron #eldar #aeldari #backstory

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oogaboogaspookyman · 5 months

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Better pinned post let's fuckin' go folks

Literally everything under the cut! Because it's kinda big! Plus extras!

NAME: Tapes, Spookyman, Spooky, Spooker, whatever the hell comes from my url tbh lol (feel free to call me Sinner or Slut that's an option too since i'm as horn knee as a fuckin' rabbit/j)

(There's also Six if you wanna refer to good ol' Murder Drones me)

This is an autistic, bisexual, essentially genderfluid freak of nature that has a questionable mental/emotional stability and mmaaaaaaayyyy orrrrr mmmaayy not have some other disorder apart from the mentioned autism, a possibility being bipolarity, Borderline and DID (that multiple personality thingy)

I work on things that are either extremely fucked up or just dumb stupid gang doing dumb stupid gags, but most of the time it's either dark humour or something straight out of like- EMESIS BLUE, to give you an idea of what i make

I am. Pretty dumb and immature and lack impulse control plussss... the energy to actually do shit about it lmao. Yes this means you'll see me swear a little more than others and casually say the worst of things pretty much hhhhh

Oh yeah i'm also pretty aggressive as in "HOW DARE THEE MAKE ME CRY LIKE THIS I'M GONNA EAT YOUR LIVER". That and the other sense that i'd rather not disclose for personal reasons

What am i into? Let's see here...

Murder Drones (V💕💕💕💕💕💕💕)

Pokemon, kinda

The Amazing Digital Circus, a bit

Internet horror (ya ever seen The Walten Files? Lacey Games? They're good examples)

Body horror

Friday Night Funkin'. It's on the god damn title

Cult Of The Lamb (i made a mascot horror au for this lmaooo)

Boys and girls that can pretty much kill me. Horrible taste, i know

Ruler Of Everything, my life force

Etc etc etc i don't got the energy to list everything, so it's all off the top of my head

Dni? Nah i live by the "if we vibe, it's fine" rule. Just don't fuck around with my temper or pull a funny stunt and i ain't dropping you into a pit full of starving hyenas

If you're looking for the 100 reasons to live post, here's the link. Please stay with us, i'd hate to see you go like this. There's always another day.

FUN SHIT TO DO BECAUSE I'M BORED

Art trades (OPEN)

Requests (CLOSED)

Flirt with my fucking characters it's funny (OPEN)

What do my blorbos think of yours? (OPEN)

Crack ships lmaoooo (OPEN)

Idfk dude lmao no better ideas i'll add more as time goes by

#pinned post #about fuckin' time too #i'm not telling you everything in this post btw. if you wanna know dm me

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dreamybasil · 4 months

Note

I HAVE CRACKED THE CODE AT SUNFLOWER

The reason for why sunflower is so popular

Is be ause Basil got no bitches

Basil literally has no better pairing then sunflower

So far the only other homosapien Basil ship that is popular that I know of is cactiflower ( aka Kel x Basil ) we don't talk about Basil x Maverick

Any other Basil ship is with a girl and with people believing (and rightfully so) that Basil is GAY they don't like those ships

And I guess people just don't like cactiflower too much (rip..)

People literally can't find any other good pairing for Basil leaving him with nobody, which people don't like.. cuz people find replacements for others like Kel with Cris and Aubrey with Kim.

Clearly that is the reason why

There is simply not enough queer people in faraway for Basil.

So that is why sunflower is so popular.

people can do OC x CANON and make a man for Basil

queer is accomplished

@flower-crown-fan is my sweetest and best example with Osuke

thee... thethe i forgot his height again

theee... the 6'10''??? guy

the pathetic soppy wet cat for the little twink flower boy <333

(tho i dont draw canon basil and instead do my soxi basil,,)

#askbasilquestions

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quietwings-fics · 7 months

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Tolls for Thee

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Archive Warning: N/A Fandom: Supernatural Ship: Gen (Lucifer & Sam, Lucifer & Death, Lucifer & Michael) Additional Tags: Lucifer's Cage (Supernatural), Angst, Season/Series 06, Abduction, Protective Lucifer (Supernatural), Hurt Lucifer (Supernatural) Wordcount: 1400 Summary:

Dean made a deal to save his brother's soul from Hell. It doesn't feel like Sam's being saved to Lucifer. It feels like he's being kidnapped.

Lucifer has very little left, but he has Sam and in some ways, that's all that's ever mattered to him. It is all that matters now, since there will be no more Apocalypse, no more freedom, no more future. Only the Cage, its frozen isolation broken by his brother and the humans they both hold close. Lucifer adjusts to Michael's presence faster than he expected. There isn't much room for fighting.

He curls himself around Sam's soul. His body, half Lucifer's own by the time of their fall, is gone. He doesn't know when it happened. The first... Measures of time mean little in Hell, but when they fell, there was a period of confusion and anger and chaos that Lucifer can't remember very clearly. The evidence of it mostly laid in scars along his now calm brother's wings or ones Michael gave him in return. Sam's body was there and then it wasn't. Lucifer keeps his soul tucked even closer than Michael does Adam's because of it, for Sam's own protection.

He nuzzles against Sam's soul, wings raised over him to keep him hidden from view and near the heart of Lucifer's grace. Sam has long since gotten used to Lucifer's true form, regarding it as familiar, even beautiful, rather than horrifying. Hell has done the best it can to tear him apart, but under Lucifer's constant watch, it never hurts him more than Lucifer can heal. He stitches Sam back together with his own grace, singing softly to him to soothe his pain.

He's scared that he won't be able to keep Sam safe forever.

It's Hell that he's frightened of losing Sam to. He never even considered that there were other forces working overhead to take him away.

He thought he might be allowed some peace, at least, if not his freedom.

Michael rouses first. His movement sends a shockwave through Lucifer's grace. He rises, tucking Sam's soul tighter into himself as he turns to face the being approaching the Cage. The bars obscure their view. Lucifer snarls at Michael for the first time in ages as his brother twists and bumps into him to try and get a better view, only making it harder for Lucifer to see. Michael doesn't even bother to return it.

A moment later, and Lucifer is as silent as he is, pulling himself back from the bars as the being reaches them. There's nowhere for him to go. Michael presses close to his side. Lucifer feels the strangest urge to hide under his wing, even though he knows Michael wouldn't let him, not anymore. Instead, he reassures Sam with a deep hum, hiding him deeper in his own grace to keep him from feeling Lucifer's own fear.

Because Death has come to the Cage, and It and Lucifer did not part on good terms.

"Did your vessel-" Lucifer begins to ask, but before he can finish his sentence, Michael cuts him off sharply.

"No." In that, Lucifer can hear how terrified he is. He isn't bothering to hide it. They're staring down the same barrel: an eternity without the only creature in the universe who is meant to understand them. Lucifer can't see Adam. Michael is keeping him away from Death, too.

There is a prison out there that could hold Death. Lucifer broke it with a resounding, bloody crack. The bars of Lucifer's Cage don't stop Its approach. It pauses. Lucifer wonders if It indulges in petty delights like the taste of an archangel's fear. He has never understood It, no matter how well It served his cause. However warped he has become, the core of Lucifer has always been light and creation. That might have been his undoing, wielding Death like an attack dog against humanity when It was much more dangerous to the angel holding Its leash.

"Why are you here?"

"I made a deal with Dean Winchester for his brother's soul," Death tells Lucifer, "and I find him marginally less annoying than I do you." Lucifer can feel Michael bristle beside him with instinctive, unnecessary fury.

Lucifer has seen Sam's memories a thousand times. He's lived them through Sam's eyes, felt everything Sam did. He knows what it was like to feel Dean's arms around him as he collapsed into the mud and died for the first time. He knows what it felt like to wake up afterwards and have Dean hovering over him, his soul already bargained away. He remembers what it was to have a brother who would do anything to save him.

Dean Winchester would only make a deal with a being like Death for one person, and that's not the half-brother he barely knew.

"You can't have him," Lucifer says. He tries to back away further, but the freezing bars send pain lancing through his grace for getting too close. Sam's soul chirps in concern. Lucifer's grace thrums through every inch of his soul, holding him together. "You can't. He won't survive without me."

"Dean made the deal knowing that risk. Let him go, Lucifer." Lucifer hisses. He wants to tear Dean apart himself, and he doesn't know if it's for Sam's sake or his own. If keeping Sam is selfish, then he doesn't care. He belongs with Lucifer now. Taking him away will shatter them both. Death watches without much sympathy. "I will take him from you if I have to," It says with the cadence of a weary adult confiscating a toy from a spoiled child.

"Try," Lucifer says, as though he can do anything to stop It.

Lucifer isn't strong enough for Death to bother fighting him. Lucifer is prepared for one, not for Death to reach forward, reach through Lucifer, and pluck Sam out of his grace as easily as one might pull a fruit off a tree branch. It hurts more than anything Lucifer has ever felt before. Sam panics as he's torn from Lucifer's grasp. Lucifer clings on tighter until he hears Sam crying out in pain and feels his grace pulling Sam apart from the inside to try and keep him. If he holds on, then Lucifer will be the one to destroy him.

He lets go.

"Please," he begs. Death doesn't even look at him once he's not an obstacle anymore. It turns away from Lucifer, and he screams. "No! Give him back!" It's all impotent rage, and it goes as ignored as any of Lucifer's tantrums. Death leaves, taking Sam's soul with It, and Lucifer can't let It. He can't. He charges after Death, straight in to the bars that imprison him. He bashes his grace against them again and again, "Sam! Sam! Sam!" They burn cold against his grace each time, leaving scars each time he rams his entire being against them. If he can only make a crack, he can slip a little of his grace through to go with Sam and keep him safe. He slams himself into the bars harder.

He can't stop. Sam is fading away. Lucifer can barely hear a whisper of him beyond the bars. He grows more frantic, crashing against the sides of the Cage like a trapped animal, snarling and clawing at the bars as they burn him back, embedding shards of the Cage deep into his grace in an attempt to sedate him. Lucifer batters his wings against the ceiling until broken feathers begin to litter the ground. He can feel his wings ripping apart the harder he lashes out, but he has to get out, he has to get Sam back, he has to-

Lucifer loses himself, blinded by fear and anger, fed by his own pain as it grows worse and worse until he collapses. His grace breaks before the Cage does. He shivers, curling in on himself and whimpering as he's forced to feel the damage he did to himself in horrible clarity as the fight bleeds out of him.

He didn't even make a dent.

Michael comes closer. Lucifer tries to lash out at him. It's not fair. He gets to keep Adam. It's not fair! He can't do much more than weakly beat him back. Michael pushes through it until he's able to wrap himself around Lucifer, pressing his own grace into Lucifer's wounds. Lucifer refuses to acknowledge it.

Michael covers Lucifer with a wing. It feels like an apology. Lucifer doesn't want it. He just wants Sam back.

(Enjoyed it? Any interaction is welcomed. You can even support me on Ko-Fi <3)

#whumptober2023 #no.16 #'Don't go where I can't follow.'#supernatural #fic #fanfiction #teen and up audiences #1001-5000 #spn #genfic #death & lucifer #lucifer & michael #lucifer & sam #lucifer spn #death spn #michael spn #sam winchester #cage thots #hurt!lucifer

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str0l0gy · 1 year

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DISASTER INC. (TEASER!)

PAIRING! soccercaptain!sim jake x volleyballcaptain!fem!reader

DISCLAIMERS! TBD.

FEATURING! TBD.

GENRE! smau + written, angst, fluff, crack, fake dating, enemies to friends to lovers, academic rivals, non-idol!au, highschool!au

#enhypen #enhypen imagine #kpop #enhypen x reader #enhypen fluff #fluff #angst #sim jake x reader #jake sim #enhypen jake #jake sim fanfic #jake sim smau #enhypen smau #kpop smau

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punkeropercyjackson · 1 month

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I hate........how sexualizing teenage superheroes is the norm in the superheroes fandom at large.Forgive me for traumadumping ig but i have really strong feelings on this as an autistic adult with a special interest in superheroes at large themselves and itself as a genre

My first hero spin was Big Hero 6.By the time it came out,i was 13 so i was allowed internet access no problem and naturally i went looking all over for content of literally everything about it but my favorite character was Hiro so he was what i searched for the most and he was LUDICRIOUSLY objectified and fetishized for his wasian heritage and when the series came out,he got an official love interest named Karmi who's 16 to his 14 and she got tons of hate from Hiro x Gogo and Hiro x Honey shippers despite them not only being college aged to his again,FOURTEEN years but we got explicit ages for them in season 2 when the Nerd Gang minus him gratuated from SFIT so they're canonically TWENTY ONE(i feel it's an important sidenote that Karmi's brownskin with a hooked nose and her VA is indonesian/chinese mixed so her heritage is obvious and as to how it contributed to her reception vs easian Gogo and blonde light-eyed Honey)

My second one was Bnha and there's been tons of discussion about the base's problem with the UA students and Himiko and i thank everyone who's posted about it deeply but my specific one is that my otp of the series was and will always be Shouto and Momo aka Todomomo even if i'm not nearly as into Bnha as i used to be because they were the first ship i actively made content for and it lasted years and that combined with me headcanoning them as bi4bi,t4t and autistic4autistic helped my egg crack and realize my own autism big time so their relathionship eternally has a big place in my heart

This means i've witnessed grown ass people saying Shouto almost touched Momo's boobs in that cap where he stopped her during their Aizawa fight(and his hand didn't even land on her chest)as a running thing and same for him acting as a macho man who rules over her body so she can't wear what she wants or exist near other men,including BAKUGOU who Momo HATES IN-TEXT,or have conflict with him because he'll just 'put her in her place as his woman' and Momo who's thee 'silk hiding steel' character and has adultification trauma that triggers her anxiety as the plot of the Todomomo starter 'Yaoyorozu Rising' with Shouto helping her with words of affirmation,healthy communication and good boundries on both sides that became the foundation of their dynamic throught the whole franchise,manga and extras,is reduced down the 'the class mom to Iida's class dad' as if she's ever even looked in his general direction and when she's rightfully earned her place as Shouto's best friend alongside Izuku himself and that is INSANELY imppressive taking into account her limited screentime.All i wanted was them being goth bf x pastel gf and getting to heal their inner child together and what i got was a nsfw Todomomo week on twitter and a certain artist drawing Momo/Dabi as an 'April Fool's' joke MULTIPLE YEARS in a row because he's also a Todoroki so it's also Todomomo lololol and i also did her with Natsuo and Fuyumi,i'm so funny!The only good thing to come out of that i started spite headcanoning Momo and Dabi as found siblings and platonic soulmates and realized i was actually on point

Then i watched Batman:Under The Red Hood when i was 19 and Jason became a character i selfship with romantically so i did the logical thing and started reading comics,starting with his.Did you know it's canon that while he dosen't exactly hunt them down specifically,he hates pedophiles and incesters so he once targeted a teacher because he was csa'ing one of his student's and expressed disgust at the thought of kissing any of his brothers based off them being brothers?You wouldn't know either of these things off fanon alone,you'd think he was creepy older guy who seeks out younger people on purpose when he dosen't seek anybody out period and that's his canon relathionships coping mechanism and it's also canon he couldn't talk to girls and pushed a guy off a roof for running a sex ring as Robin.As ROBIN,a fucking 11-15 year old Jason had that much of a moral backbone and willingness to take action in it yet everyone thinks he'd date a CHILD,even HIS OWN UNDERAGED SIBLINGS,with taking advantage of them as the appeal

I absolutely loved Into The Spiderverse as an afrolatino like Miles who was a troubled kid like he is too and i thought Gwen was super good too and Peter B's another character i selfship with romantically so naturally i was hyped for Across and the first thing the fandom did when the trailer dropped?Make a hyperpopular meme where that sweet,soft,wholesome scene where Gwen gets cheeky and looks through Miles' sketchbook and sees he's so in love with her he dedicated it's entierty to her just existing as herself into him seeing her as nothing but a sexual object with degrading features she does not have and it was a sick joke on Gwen because the boy she loves just wants her for sex and not even for what she actually looks and that just makes it even worse!!!Then there's the equally pure implied thing they did of her either stealing Hobie's sweaters because he makes her feel safe after her abusive dad kicked her out for being trans or him giving them to her to borrow as affection that ALSO got twisted into Gwen being nothing but a sex object,by people who see Hobie's age interpretation not even as a minor but in his 20s unlike how actual Ghostpunks do!!!!!!!,and don't think i haven't seen the Margo shit calling her 'thicc' and turning the girls into Miles' 'harem'

And the thing that made realize this is that it's always been like this is when i went looking for Teen Titans screenshots,first Starfire and Blackfire for me and my little sister and then ones of the animated Titans in general for my little brother because he did an edit-redraw of our DC self-inserts together using one so i got excited at how good it was and decided to ask for a few more since we have friends who have DC ocs too and we're all doing a canon rewrite fixit with them but the first results were fucking incest softcore porn and TOO DAMN MUCH horny Bbrae fanart.One of the friend's in question is like another brother to me and he's 17 and he thought there was nothing wrong with Jason/The Fenton Siblings because when i said find it triggering just in general,he tried to explain that i was 'making the wrong assumption' because a lot of people age up Danny and Jazz and he'd learned that from older DPDC fans.They literally groomed him and i'm so glad i met him and helped him unlearn that shit before he could get hurt

That's not normal.NONE of that is normal to involve children even if fictional because they're meant to be exactly like REAL kids mentally and physically and you get upset at the real ones for being upset by you doing this to them and even harrass them for it and i've had to directly defend another one of my little sibling's from harrasment from 'fandom elders' because he dared to have an opinion that 'dosen't follow the rules'.I'm sick of this,i can't stand this,this needs to DIE.There's no exaggaration over ten times the adult superheroes than they're are kid ones and you fucking ship them with eachother instead just sticking to the adults for smut.Batman and Robin were seen as a couple in ye olden times by a group of gay people not because Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson harbord secret romantic feelings for eachother since conception or intended to later on but because that specific gay people were irl pedophiles who used being gay as a defense

I don't care if i sound childish or if nobody who this is aimed at cares,i hate all of you for this.I hate you for tarnishing my special interest,i hate you for violating the history of superheroes and the creation of sidekicks and kid heroes as role models and escapism fantasies for real kids,i hate you for beyond disrespecting that superheroes as a WHOLE were created by jewish folks and that Clark Kent,the FIRST superhero,is the protector of all innocents with a deep love for children and gets especially angry when they're hurt and is a fundemental trait he has to have or he's NOT Superman or Clark Kent Kal-El or Superdad,i hate that the sexualization of underaged supers and them being abused as 'romance' by their fucking pseudo-parents is a long running punchline.I hate you with my entire heart and soul and actual comics reading knowledge

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