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youvebeenlivingfictional · 11 days

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pleaseee kisses prompts 14, 15, and 33 with patrick zweig 🙏🫠

Sure :D

Prompts: An unexpected kiss that shocks the one receiving it; a kiss so desperate that the two wind around each other, refusing to let go until they are finished; a fierce kiss that ends with a bite on the lip, soothing it with a lick.

Warnings: Fluff; flirty Patrick; fake dating; smooches

Summary: Finding your plus one to a wedding at the last minute on Tinder had been dicey, sure, but you couldn't have anticipated this.

"Would you cut it out?"

"No." Patrick's refusal was muffled as he chowed down on another two mini crab cakes. You glanced around nervously, concerned that anyone you knew might see your plus one shoving every hors d'oeuvre that he could get his hands on into his mouth.

Finding your plus one to a wedding at the last minute on Tinder had been dicey, sure, but you couldn't have anticipated this.

The trade was straightforward: Patrick was your plus one to your friend's wedding, and you let Patrick shower at your place and crash at yours (or cover the cost of a motel for the night—he was cool with either).

But now, you were considering cutting ties early. If Patrick kept this up, then it defeated the whole fricking purpose of having him go with you in the first place. You didn't think that anything could be more embarrassing than showing up to a wedding alone while your ex was attending with his new girlfriend, but the way Patrick was stuffing his face was quickly proving you wrong.

"Seriously," You hissed, leaning in and elbowing him in the side, "You're either gonna choke, or I'm going to choke you."

Patrick grinned as he chewed, dusting off his fingers.

"Okay," He agreed before chasing the swallow with a swig of his beer. "Okay, you're right. I'll slow it down."

"Thank you."

"Need to save room for dinner, anyway. And cake. Are people still doing cake at weddings?"

"Sometimes."

"You think they will?"

"Honestly, they seem more like a dessert bar couple. They'll probably have a little cake for themselves."

"Explains why I haven't seen one." He folded his arms on the high table, glancing around the others mingling at cocktail hour. "Seen the ex yet?"

"No."

"You should've shown me a picture, I could keep an eye out for him, too."

"Better if you don't know what he looks like. Then you can be genuinely surprised if I introduce you."

"You don't trust my acting abilities?"

"With all due respect, you could be Ted Bundy 2.0 for all I know."

"Fake cast and missing puppy story not included."

You smiled in spite of yourself, and Patrick grinned.

"Tell me about yourself," He urged.

"What for?"

"Gotta pass the time somehow—especially if you're going to poo-poo me from the pu pu platter."

"There isn't a pu pu platter in sight."

"Can you just appreciate the joke?"

"It was a fine joke."

"C'mon. I mean, you're funny, you're gorgeous," He raised his hand, waving toward you, "Why does someone like you need to surf Tinder to find a plus one?"

You smiled, looking down at your drink.

"First of all, thank you."

"Anytime."

"Second of all...I don't know, since my ex left me I've been focusing on myself."

"No hoe phase?"

"Hoe—ly shit, you seriously talk to people you don't know like that?" You scoffed.

"I just mean, you know. Sometimes after a breakup, you wanna fuck around a little. Nothing wrong with that. It would explain why you're on Tinder."

"Oh? Is that you're on Tinder?"

"Honestly? No."

"Why, then?"

Patrick shrugged. "I like sex and sometimes I have trouble finding somewhere to sleep."

"How's that working?"

"Better than you'd think."

"Does the sex thing always happen?"

"Not always. I'm happy to crash on a couch."

"Mm."

"Not that I mind it when it happens. Thanks for answering my question, by the way."

"What do you mean?"

"About the hoe phase. You just said 'the sex thing' like it's a creature from the black lagoon."

"I did not—" You began to wind up for the next round of argument, but were cut off by the sound of your name being called. You winced, steeling yourself and urging, "Don't look."

"That the ex?"

"Yes."

"Perfect," Patrick stood up straighter, straightening his jacket. "Showtime."

"You sound way too excited—"

"Hey!" Your ex spoke up behind you, and you slapped a smile on, wheeling around and greeting, "Jeremy, hi!"

"How's it going?" Jeremy began to lean in for a hug, but went still when Patrick curled his arm around your waist. Your stomach flipped at the gesture, keeping your eyes carefully trained on Jeremy's face.

"It's going great, how are you?"

"It's good, it's good."

"Where's Francesca?"

"Oh, she's grabbing a drink."

"Awesome."

"You want another one, baby?"

Patrick's question threw you for a loop for a second, but you shook your head, smiling.

"I'm good, hon, but thanks."

"I don't think we've—met?" Jeremy's voice tipped up, and you had to fight off a laugh.

"I don't think you have. Jeremy, this is Patrick."

"Hi."

You watched Jeremy hold his hand out to shake, but Patrick just tightened his grip on your hip, drawing you a little closer as he offered, "Nice to meet you."

Jeremy's smile faltered as he drew his hand back, tucking it into his pocket.

"You two been together long?"

"Oh, gosh, a few months," You flubbed.

"How'd you, uh—How'd you meet?"

"At a match. I'm a tennis player."

"Oh! You any good?" Jeremy asked.

"He's the best," You answered without missing a beat.

Patrick chuckled softly, nose nudging against your cheek. "You're gonna make me blush, sweetie."

"Good," You smiled at him. A thrill shot through you as Patrick's eyes dipped to your mouth, and before you knew it, he was leaning in for a gentle kiss. You let your eyes slip closed, your lips working tenderly against his. Patrick's hand slid from your hip, sliding lower and palming your ass. You drew back, giving Patrick a warning look before turning to look at Jeremy again as he cleared his throat.

"I should go find Francesca."

"Sure! It was great seeing you."

"You, too—and nice meeting you, Patrick."

"Charmed," Patrick cooed. The two of you watched him turn, disappearing into the crowd.

"...That was good, right?"

"Yeah, it was good...Patrick?"

"Yeah?"

"Get your hand off of my ass."

"Sure." He gave it a pat before turning back to the table, eyeing a passing server's tray. "Is that shrimp cocktail?"

"That wasn't so bad."

"Are you asking me or telling me?"

"Little bit of both." Patrick leaned against your front hall wall. You took him in for a moment, taking in his loose tie, and his jacket where he was holding it over his shoulder.

"I think we were very convincing, so," You tipped your head from side to side. "You're right. It wasn't so bad. Thank you."

"Hey, sure. You can just venmo me."

"What?"

"For the motel."

"Oh! Oh, of course." You fished into your purse for your phone, biting your lip. To be honest, you'd been rethinking that particular part of the plan all evening. You hated to admit it, but Patrick was gorgeous, and had been so goddamn charming. He'd been funny, had made conversation with the other guests at your table, and he'd been perfectly affectionate—kisses on the cheek, the lips; a hand on your back, your waist. A time or two, he'd gazed into your eyes in a way that had felt so sincere and...Real.

Sure, he'd driven you nuts at the beginning of the evening, but he had grown on you.

"Um," You spoke up. "I was, uh...I was thinking."

"What about?"

"About the sex...Thing." You glanced nervously toward Patrick just in time to see his expression melt into flirty intrigue.

"Oh yeah?" He goaded. "What about it?"

You couldn't just come out and say it, right? You set your phone down on the counter and strode toward Patrick before you could talk yourself out of it. You grasped his rough cheeks, drawing him in for a kiss. He went without hesitation, dropping his jacket and curling his arms around you. You groaned softly, sliding a hand up into his hair and letting him steer you back against the wall. You parted your lips as Patrick's tongue probed them gently, his leg slotting between yours and rocking it back and forth.

You rolled your hips down against it, whining softly against his lips as his hands skimmed over your body. Patrick began to draw away, but you leaned up, catching hold of his lower lip with your teeth and giving it a rough bite. His hips jolted against yours, groaning low in his throat as you soothingly slipped your tongue along the skin.

"Do you still want me to Venmo you?" You asked.

"Not really. You still want me to crash on the couch?"

You hummed, pretending to contemplate before you let your hand slide from his curls to his neck.

"How about we start on the couch."

#Patrick Zweig x Reader #Patrick Zweig x You #Patrick Zweig/Reader #Patrick Zweig/You #Patrick Zweig fic #Patrick Zweig imagine #asks #replies #anon #kiss prompts

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cosettefauchelevente · 2 years

Text

cáca (cake) vs caca (poo)

bríste (trousers) vs briste (broken)

éire (ireland) vs eire (burden)

léamh (reading) vs leamh (weak)

órla (name meaning "golden princess") vs orla (vomit)

seán (irish for jean/john) vs sean (old)

snámh (swim) vs snamh (dislike)

and that, friends, is why remembering the fada is extremely important in irish. you wouldn't want to go to the gaeltacht and order a caca instead of a cáca, would you?

bonus: séan with the fada on the e means "deny"

#gaeilge #irish language #langblr #omg im so annoyed with myself #just realise I put cáca on top of bríste so it's not alphabetised

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pottypet · 1 year

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Can you tell us about the biggest mess you've made in a diaper

Thanksgiving Mess

After my accident in Wal-Mart my boyfriend started requiring that I wear diapers whenever we went out in public together. So if I wanted to attend Thanksgiving dinner with his family I would have to wear one so I don't embarrass him in front of everyone by accidentally pooping in my panties. I was hesitant to wear such an embarrassing thing to dinner but I didn't want him to be upset with me so I agreed.

I wore my diaper under my skinny jeans and hoped it wouldn't be too noticeable. My boyfriend assured me that no one would be able to tell I was even wearing one. I felt confident in my outfit and we went on our way to his parent's home.

We sat at the table with his entire family and chatted away before his mom brought the food out. I stuffed myself with ham, turkey, green beans, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, and so much more. After about 40min of eating I was entirely full. Once everyone was finished with their dinners we stayed at the table and continued conversing and joking around with each other.

After a while of talking with his family I started to feel my tummy shift. It felt like my dinner was about to go right through me. My face went pale as I felt my cheeks clench, trying my best to keep my cool and to stop myself from losing control.

His family continued their conversations and didn't seem to notice me in discomfort which I was grateful for. I couldn't hold it in anymore. A thick gush escaped my body and squirted out into the seat of my diaper. I knew I wasn't finished though so I prayed that no one could tell what was happening and continued soiling myself at the table. Gush after gush of thick, soft, poo began filling my diaper, squishing up my crack and spreading over my cheeks. My entire Thanksgiving dinner was coming out into my diaper. I could feel my diaper getting bigger and heavier and started to worry that I might have a blow-out.

I was nearly finished messing myself when his older brother noticed. A wet squirting noise came from my diaper when he got everyone's attention. "What was that sound??" he asked. "...and what is that smell?" his sister chimed in.

"May I be excused?" I asked as I stood up from the table, hoping to escape the situation. I was unaware of how I looked before his family began freaking out. Apparently my diaper had poofed out so much that it was extremely visible in my jeans. And the weight of the mess in my diaper had caused my jeans to sag, exposing my diaper's waistband to everyone. His whole family could clearly see that I was wearing a diaper... and that it was full.

"Oh my god... she's wearing a diaper!" his grandma shrieked. "She shit herself!" his cousin shouted. "If you want to pack your pampers full then go take a seat at the kid's table!" his uncle laughed. "Awee does the baby need a diapey change??" his brother teased.

My face turned bright red as I quickly left the room. My boyfriend followed me out into the living room. I thought he was going to comfort me but when I looked he was holding a diaper bag. "Let's take care of that messy diaper" he sighed. "In here?!" I yelped.

I accepted defeat and layed out on the floor like a toddler, feeling my hot, squishy, mess all over my bottom. My boyfriend took my jeans off and then, to my surprise, his family entered the room. "We want to see how you change such a big messy diaper!" his brother laughed. My boyfriend laughed along and then unfastened the tabs on my diaper. I wanted to disappear, I was mortified.

He opened my diaper up and exposed my mess to everyone. Brown sludge was caked up my crack and all over my cheeks. The entire diaper was filled with it. "Oh my god, she's destroyed that thing!" his mom shouted. "Poor girl had quite the accident!" his grandpa said while shaking his head. "My kiddo never poops that bad!" his sister laughed.

My boyfriend began wiping me clean, letting them all see my bum up in the air.

#diaper check #diaper humiliation #diaper kink #messy diaper #pantypoop

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catiuskaa · 6 months

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hi katsy poo... thought long and hard about this and came up w absolutely nothing. i had to dig far into my messy notes app to find ideas and these are from all the way back in summer for context ☠️☠️

have you ever been to the beach/pool and seen a cute lifeguard yk? i was thinking maybe skz as lifeguards - this is derived from a lifeguard chan idea my friend and i were talking about <3 (i just thought - jisung giving you a smooch after saving you but playing it off as mouth-to-mouth resuscitation cause he's too shy to admit he's crushing)

excited to see where your mind takes this! cannot wait <33

BABY THAT’S ACTUALLY GENIUS!?

I can actually see it like -excited sounds-

It got me thinking! So I’m turning this into a mix of small blurbs and I'm not apologizing

I'm trying, but they're hot! —lifeguard!skz

To have a baseline, I don't think Meowracha would fit. Like. i just couldn't picture Minho or Felix in this?? (sorry if you were expecting those two!)

But, because of that, they're the besties who —after a thorough session of negotiating, and a large, strained okaaaaaaaaayy from Minho—, agree to go with you to your usual fitness center, which recently opened a swimming pool facility! (and they've hired a certain group of lifeguards... oh wow...)

(got carried out: 2k words)

"This place smells like plastic. And I can't even swim."

You rolled your eyes as Felix snickered, the three of you checking into the new building.

"Minho, there are other things aside from the pool. That's why I even invited you in the first place, like I mentioned the last seven times you started whining about the exact same thing." You let out an exaggerated huff as you smirked, shaking your head sideways.

You separated from your small group as you entered the changing rooms, and quickly put on your dark-coloured swimsuit, your towel resting on your shoulders when you got in the brand new area.

And let me tell you, it was big.

Impressed by the depth of the building, you couldn't see a couple of small-looking kids running around the swimming pool playing tag in loud, childish giggles.

"Careful!" A voice warned, but it startled you, and you jumped in your place, slipping on the wet floor.

Not one of your fanciest of moments, no.

Or so you thought, until your back didn't quite meet the floor, but instead softly crashed against a lean, warm surface.

Knowing Felix would immediately ask you if you were alright and Minho would threaten to let go in less than a second, you looked up at your saviour, and you were welcomed by a handsome rounded face, eyes small because of his heartwarming smile.

Forcing your stumbling legs up, you froze in front of him and stuttered. "T-thank you. Or... I'm sorry. Wasn't paying attention," you managed to let out, followed by a pink dust colouring your cheeks.

fuck, shit, fuck. why did he have to be hot too?!

"Totally fine!" He brushed off nonchalantly, his smile shining enthusiastically, so contagious you couldn't help but grin back.

He called over the member of staff who had warned you, his voice loud to the point were you had to restrain yourself from jumping in your place again when he screamed his name, not wanting to trip another time, and as he smiled at you and walked off to look for the problematic kids or their parents, you could read Changbin on the back of his red and white shirt, the short sleeves letting you see an extensive trail of inked lines that got lost underneath his top and swimming shorts.

what a piece of cake.

Almost in an instant, a slightly younger lifeguard approached you, not quite panting, but really close to doing so. You got flustered, not knowing exactly how to react, and just stared at him while he rested his hands on his waist, looking like he had run several marathons in less than an hour.

"I'm so sorry...! I should've stopped the kids... or warned you sooner..." He sighed, looking quite tired despite it barely being his first week.

"Don't sweat, I'm okay." You shrugged sheepishly. "Rough day?" You smiled, hoping to get one back from him.

He scoffed, amused. You celebrated silently. "More like a rough job... Uh! I mean, no! I love my job...!" You grinned, raising your eyebrows, shocked yet still unable to hold back a sheepish snicker. "Ah, shi... I mean... goddamnit, please don't tell Chan..." he muttered, defeated.

"Oh, wait, Chan?" You blinked, recognizing the nickname. "Wasn't he a trainer in the gym?"

Catching his breath, now looking less stressed, he nodded, hands still on his noticeably really slim waist, unlike the other lifeguard, who was shredded.

"He and Hyunjin were swapped around because they had more experience than other candidates for the jobs. They're both great, don't get me wrong. But Hyunjin should really stop flirting with the group of girls from the synchronized swimming class..." he huffed, then blushed. "Oh." His eyes widened, and he stared at the floor almost mortified.

"Right, eh..." You smiled, amused at his slip-ups, biting your lip softly.

Jisung blushed even more at your giggles, trying and failing to hold it back because he couldn't help but ogle at your defined and fit body from all the exercise you did, being a member of the centre for quite some time. You were a stunning stranger whose giggles were cute. Too much for his caffeine-filled, sleep-deprived self.

"Jisung. Soon-to-be-fired, lifeguard Han Jisung." He presented himself with tired eyes, the last part more for himself than for you, then covered his mouth when he realized he had said it too loud. "I shouldn't have said that...!"

You couldn't help but cackle, unable to hold back your laugh as his blush got to an even deeper shade of pink.

"I'm just... going to... eh... Jeongin is... probably looking for me..."

"Jisung-ah, fighting!" You teased, and he couldn't help but blush even more, smiling as he rushed back to his assigned area of the swimming pool building.

You realized Minho and Felix had been eavesdropping when Minho passed an arm over your shoulders and ruffled your hair, making it messy.

"Yeah, welcome back, cheater," he tsked, smirking.

You struggled to get away from his deathly grip, and Felix rolled his eyes, just laughing at you two.

"Oi, isn't that Chan?" the freckled asked, signalling somewhere else.

"I care more about that hottie who ran away a second ago." Minho scoffed, focused on his own priorities, sounding offended by the fact that he hadn't been able to talk to Jisung.

Felix waved at Chan, and happily waddled his way to him, the two already close friends.

While Minho hurried off to the sauna, Felix and you tried out the main swimming pool, at first actually swimming, but ending up just chatting playfully, Chan joining in from time to time, and then he stayed close during his break.

You got out of the pool and sat on the edge when suddenly you felt someone tickle your sides and push you, making you fall into the water.

Swimming to the surface with ease, you moved your wet hair from your eyes, hiding half down of your face under the water, looking at Chan, who was chuckling.

“Really funny, Mr. Bang.” You mumbled, faking boredom.

“It was Felix’s idea, but I gotta admit that was funny.” He kept on laughing, and that alone was cute, but because he was on a break, to avoid being called over to work, he had taken his shirt off, not feeling cold in the acclimatized environment.

And the image just looked ten times better.

“Reeeally funny.” You were nodding, as if in deep thought. “Help me out?” You smiled innocently, raising one hand towards him.

He grabbed it, but before he could pull you up, you pulled down, his body falling over yours and staying tightly against you for a second, then you smiled under the water and started laughing as soon as you both got back to the surface.

He was blushing, but also smiling cheekily.

“Fair. I deserved that.”

After a while of swimming, laughing and splashing each other, you got out of the pool leaving Felix and Chan on their own, but felt a soft sting in the back of your thigh. Probably from when you were sitting and Chan pushed you to the water, the slight bumps on the stone might've scratched your skin.

You started looking for your towel, but frowned when it wasn’t where you had left it. From the corner of your eye you saw Minho, and he smiled slyly from afar, your towel resting on his shoulders.

what a bitch.

You ran after him but were quickly stopped by yet another lifeguard.

Really, really lucky you.

You were only able to read Seungmin on the back of his shirt before he turned around and frowned, and you struggled to slow down, ending up bumping onto him.

"I'm sorry, uh, I uh..." you stammered, struggling to find an excuse.

He sighed, and deadpanned at you, in his eyes a hint of mockery that didn't reach his face, and it made you even more flustered. He pointed to a sign on the wall, who said in a big, bold font, "do not run near the pool."

"You probably can swim, but can you read, dollface?"

d-dollface?

“Y-yeah, of course I can. I forgot.” You pouted.

He smirked slightly. “You forgot how to read?”

You frowned softly at the tease, and he brushed it off with one hand.

“Where were you going that was so important for you to be running?” He questioned, the sly smirk lingering on his lips, the mockery still there.

“I wanted to go to the infirmary but my friend took my towel.” You defended yourself, but a blush crept from underneath, making your cheeks pink.

The moment you said infirmary, Seungmin’s entire body language changed. The mockery wasn’t gone, but covered by a layer of innocent worry. Cute.

“To the infirmary? Why? Did something happened?” He asked softly, and it surprised you how fast his attitude had changed.

“I just scratched myself. It’s probably nothing…”

He shook his head and smiled, almost tender. “Nonsense. Can I have a look at it?”

You blushed slightly and turned so he could look at the small scratch in the back of your thigh. The area was red, and there was small even more red lines in it, but nothing too wild.

Seungmin cleared his throat. Stay focused.

“You should still put something on it. I’ll do it. Come with me.”

Crossing from where you were with Seungmin you passed by the kids’ swimming pool, and waved at Han, and who you thought was who he had mentioned, Jeongin, struggling to take care of the kids as they all ran around, fighting with the swimming noodles as they used those like swords, and you couldn’t help but smile at the mess.

Seungmin took a small radio device from his waistband, like a black walkie-talkie. “Send Changbin to area 3. Jeongin, office, 6pm.”

The youngest-looking of all the lifeguards in the building approached you two when Seungmin told you to wait while he looked for the first-aid kit.

“Hi, as you might’ve heard, my name is Jeongin. Did you get hurt?” He said, so softly you almost cooed at him because he was so cute.

“Um, I scratched the back on my thigh, yeah.” You smiled a bit, and he smiled back reassuringly.

“I hope it doesn’t sting a lot.” He added kindly, picking up his stuff from a locker. “I would stay and help you, but I assure you that if you’re in Seungmin’s care you have nothing to worry about.” He nodded, almost to himself. “He teases everyone a lot but he’s a nice guy. I… have to go now, my shift has ended. But it was nice to meet you!”

You bid him goodbye, and Seungmin came back in no time, carrying a small bag of medical supplies and a towel. He left it on the side, and opened the bag next to you, taking a small glass bottle of spray from it.

“Could you stand and turn around, please?” He asked formally.

You couldn’t help but blush when he sprayed the medicine, the slight sting making you gasp softly, but it was more because of the position you two were in, and because he held a cotton pad underneath the scratch, brushing your thigh with his hand.

Being outside of the water for so long now, you started feeling cold, shivering softly.

“Darling, can you pass me the towel?”

You blushed almost furiosly at the nickname and did as told, and he opened it and hung it on your shoulders, as you quickly took it and tightened it around you.

“Sorry, I didn’t give it to you before.” He smiled, throwing the cotton away and going back to put the first-aid kit in its place.

It was almost 7pm when the three of you got out of the changing rooms.

“That was really fun!” Felix smiled brightly.

“It was decent. Still couldn’t talk to that cutie back there. We should come back other time.” Minho stated, sounding like an order.

You blushed, thinking about what had happened in so little time.

“Yeah. We should come back soon.”

(teehee, i enjoyed this a lot! Hope you like it too! Thanks a lot, ren! <;333)

~Kats, who now would love to go to that swimming pool!

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