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imabeautifulbutterfly · 2 years

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Upside Down - Chapter 32

Summary: Nerex have some important news to share; brining everyone together during a moment of peace.

A/N: Hello Lovelies,

Another chapter down, so many more to go, LOL.

I wanted to let you all know that starting September 12, I’ll be going back to full time work, so my uploads may not be as consistent as they’ve been in the past year. I will do my best to keep it going, but some things may take a bit more time.

I do apologize for that, hopefully once I get a routine going it won’t be so bad.

Thank you all for showing this story so much love. LOVE OO.

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, talks of marriage, meeting up in an abandoned warehouse, being followed, clone prejudice (talked about vaguely), I think that’s it, if I miss any warnings, please let me know.

AO3 Link | Words: 6,711 | Previous - - - > Next

Upside Down Master List | Main Master List

ANNOUNCEMENT

“Girl stop it” I closed my eyes as I listened to Iz talking about her date and her subsequent run in with Fox.

“Honest to goodness truth!” Izani took a swig of her glass of wine.

“Okay, but how was the kiss?” Mafs asked, as she glanced over to see Rex and Leif playing together by the couch, Hardcase and Jessie were on their way up, along with a few others.

“Oh … it …” Izani leaned against the kitchen cabinet, her face felt flush as she thought back to how strong and soft Fox’s lips were, “it was intense and … yeah it was a good kiss. It was a kriffing good kiss.”

“Hey!” Mafs smacked Iz’s thigh, “Language, my kid is here!”

“The PARTY HAS ARRIVED!!!” Came Hardcase’s voice from the front, we all looked over to see a hoarder of blue and white, gray and white, and some yellow dispersed throughout.

“Hey guys, welcome” I shouted waving hello, Leif running over to hide by his mom. “I simply have two requests to make, first” I held my finger, “we have a youngling here, so please no cussing, and no inappropriate conversations, and yes I’m looking at you Hardcase and Sinker” I motioned between the two. “Second, please try not to break anything, the walls are somewhat thin, but I don’t have a next door neighbour, thankfully. However, that doesn’t mean you can be as loud as you want, Fives, Vi, I’m looking at the two of you!”

“Hey we are awesome!” Fives called out, Vi wrapped her arm around his shoulder placing a kiss on his cheek, “Agreed!”

“Where are the Generals?” Waxer asked as he glanced around.

“Not here, they weren’t able to make it, they needed to check something out for the ceasefire negotiations” Rex clarified as he shifted some of the furniture around with Boil so everyone could have a seat.

“Hey! No shop talk! We all promised” Mafs voice echoed over Rex’s.

“Alright, Echo, you pick the holovid. Ureli, Vi, Pepper, come over here I want you to meet Mafs and Izani” I motioned for them to come over. “Ultimate, don’t hug all of the pillows; Owl-eyes, please make sure Sten and Flex each get a can of beer don’t hog them all.”

“Would you stop being such a mother nuna” Kix shouted from his seat.

“Fine, then you organize them ori’vod … slacker”

“I heard that”

“Said it loud enough for you to hear, old man”

“Are you two always like this?” Sinker teased.

“They’re worse. Much. Much worse” Rex grumbled out, as he came over, grabbing Leif from behind Mafs legs. Leif giggled as Rex had him dangling from his shoulder, as he carried him back to the group, introducing him to his various vode.

“Whatever, riduur, you love it” I teased quietly, as I placed a kiss on his cheek, Leif let out a disgusted growl at the display of affection. I couldn’t help chuckle at his little emotion, it reminded me a little of Wolffe.

Rex gave a simple wink before heading over to the rest of the guys. Leif’s legs swinging back and forth with each of Rex’s steps.

“Vi, Pepper, Ureli, this is Mafs and Izani. Vi works as a mechanic, Pepper is a medic, and Ureli is a communications specialist, these lovely ladies all work on the 501st and have been a life preserver for me. And these two lovelies, have been a blessing too, Mafs works as a Mechanic and Tech Engineer at GAR’s headquarters, whereas Izani works for the Senator’s Guards.”

“Senator’s Guards?” Vi looked from Nerium to Izani, “I thought that was disbanded and it’s all under the Coruscant Guards”

“That was the plan, and we were suppose to be shifting under their purview, but a few of the … more … shall we say non-flexible Senators didn’t feel comfortable handing over all the security to the clone army” Izani clarified as she swirled her beer around.

“Ahhh - in other words, they were prejudiced against a bunch of men who all looked alike and probably would be wearing their helmets more often than not and therefore felt uneasy.” Izani nodded as she took another sip of her drink, “So exactly what does the Senator’s Guards do differently from the Coruscant Guard”

“We mostly do the same thing, but focus more on Senators and Senators’ families, that way the Coruscant Guard can focus on the citizens of Coruscant. We really don’t do much.”

“She lies” Mafs mumbled through her drink.

“I do not”

“Hey! Fox! What brings you here?” Rex asked as Leif climbed on his back, as he glanced to the door that had slid open.

Mafs, Iz, and I all froze, not that I wasn’t happy having him here, I just didn’t want Iz to feel uncomfortable. I took a quick peek over to see Fox’s red armour, his helmet clipped to his belt, he seemed exhausted. However, his armour wasn’t the only thing that caught my attention, standing beside him was a very familiar grey armour. The grin that wanted to erupt on my face was the biggest self-satisfactory grin imaginable, oh dear lord, this night just got good, “Hey Fox! Hey Wolffe! Welcome!” I glanced at my girls, nodding to them before heading over to welcome Fox and Wolffe properly.

“You two want to tell us why you’re acting like you’ve just seen the grim reaper?” Pepper motioned between Mafs and Izani.

“Umm … let’s just say our last individual encounters with each of them were less than …” Mafs glanced over to Iz, hoping for her to finish the statement.

“… Less than admirable” Iz shrugged.

“You can tell us” Ureli offered, “we all know how to keep a secret” she giggled.

Iz looked from Mafs to the three girls in front of them, despite the fact they just met, the fact that Nerium trusted them meant they could trust them. Izani nodded as she shrugged her shoulders and started from the beginning.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

“Looks like you have a big crowd” Wolffe grumbled as he looked around the room, he spotted Mafs easily enough, but his eyes kept focusing on the youngling that was climbing all over Rex and Hardcase, and seeming to be having a blast laughing and joking with them.

“Well everyone is always welcome here”

“Who’s the kid?” His voice still low enough only for Fox and Nerium to hear.

“The kid actually belongs to Mafs, that’s Leif”

“Huh” was all the response he gave, even he didn’t know if it was because he didn’t actually believe she had a kid, which of course that didn’t make sense, who lies about having a child, or was it because he expected the child to be a misbehaved little brat or short-tempered like his mother.

“Why don’t you go introduce yourself?” I nudged him, motioning for him to move over to Rex, he simply let out a sigh and nodded. I glanced from him to Fox who simply shrugged.

“If you’re asking me what he’s thinking…” Fox looked from me over to the kitchen his face having pure shock as my eyes followed his direction to Izani, who was standing there laughing with the girls, her eyes glancing over to the two of us, I simply smirked back at her. My eyes focused back on Fox who seemed to have lost all thought at seeing her face.

“You know” I stepped closer to him, focusing my attention on a scratch on the wall keeping my voice down, “Api and her aren’t dating.”

“What are you talking about?” His voice lowered, “What made you think I care? Even a little.”

I leaned into the wall a bit more, my finger trailing over the scratch “Oh, I’m just talking out loud, what you choose to do with that information is up to you. Anyway, despite the fun night they had, and the amazing kiss they shared” I glanced over to Fox’s hands which were clenched by his side, his knuckles turning white, “Turns out they didn’t have a spark. Interesting, huh?”

“Again, why do I care?”

I stretched my neck, rolling it slowly till I looked Fox in his eyes, all joking pushed aside, “Don’t act like you don’t.”

“Like you know anything”

“Fox I’m going to offer you some words of wisdom, just two words that you should keep in mind.”

“Which is?”

“Women talk”

“Women talk?”

“Women talk” Fox face shifted to full understanding, “Listen, it’s not my place to say anything, I just thought you might find that information relevant. Plus, if I’m not mistaken you’re still seeing the Senator, right?”

“It’s … well … somewhat … I mean …” Fox let out a big sigh, as his hand trailed over his tired eyes, “it’s complicated.”

“Then I suggest you un-complicate it before you miss out on what makes you happy.”

I moved away from Fox, although I had met him here and there during shore leave with Rex, we still weren’t exactly the closest. I sat beside Rex as Hardcase took Leif with him making the toddler chuckle as Wolffe scowled at his younger vod “What do you think?” I whispered to Rex, as my hand trailed along his neck.

“About?”

“Telling everyone?”

“You still want to tell them. I know it’s a concern for you”

I placed a kiss on his temple, “I want to; if this ceasefire doesn’t last and this war continues, I’m going to be back with the 104th and training with Quinlan. I want our family to know what you mean to me.”

Rex’s hand rested on my thigh, as he nodded, “Did Kenobi, Anakin or General Plo say anything with regards to the test?”

“They’re only going to share it with a few members of the Council. Plo’buir mentioned something about some struggling with the ways of the force, but he didn’t go into more detail.”

“Hmmm …”

“What?”

“He mentioned something similar to me during your test”

“What did he tell you?”

“He said a lot of things, but basically to sum, to keep an eye on you.”

“Good thing you’re even closer to me now to keep an eye on me”

Rex rested his forehead against Neri’s, smiling at how his life turned so hopeful simply by having her there with him. “Indeed. I hope this ceasefire lasts forever”

I hummed in agreement, “Should we tell them now?”

“Good a time as any, plus Kix said if we don’t say something soon, he’ll tell everyone.”

“He told you that too, huh?”

“Yup”

“Well, that’s about right for Kix. Well riduur, you have the floor.”

“Thanks, love. Thank you ever so much.” Rex looked at Neri narrowing his eyes at her, trying hard to hide the smirk that appeared on his lips every time he looked at his wife. “Ahem!” Rex stood from his seat, as he rested his hand on her shoulder, “Thanks everyone for coming, thank you Nerium for hosting” round of applause circulated around the room as Tup and Dogma settled making sure everyone had a can of beer, “We …” Rex looked over to Neri smiling, “We have an announcement that we wanted our family to know about.”

“We debated about whether or not to tell you, but my loving ori’vod” I motioned to Kix, “told us that if we didn’t tell the rest of you, he was going to take out a GAR news update on our behalf, so we figured this was the best way not to get anyone in trouble.”

“We simply ask you do not share this information with anyone outside of this circle of family”

“We got you vod” Fives spoke up as he nudged Echo, “Right?”

“Absolutely. You can count on us not to say anything” Echo raised his beer reinforcing his statement.

Rex looked to Neri, his face feeling flushed at the thought they were about to announce the reality of their lives, “Keep in mind we wouldn’t have thought to bring it up, if there wasn’t a ceasefire negotiations in progress.”

“Kriff, just get on with it!” Wolffe muttered as his hands rested against the back of the couch.

“Wolffe, language” my face was stern as I glanced to the kid in Hardcase’s arms, Wolffe looked over nodding, muttering an apology.

“And on that note,” Rex chuckled, “Neri and I exchanged our riduurok vows.”

Silence unlike ever heard before filled a room full of clone troopers and women who lived for joyous news, gossip, jokes, and trading barbs back and forth, quite like it filled that moment and hung around every single person there.

Everyone simply stared at us for a good minute.

“Wait … are you serious?” Vi questioned as she looked between the two of us. I simply nodded, “How … I mean … how?”

“Mandalorian vows” Rex spoke up before I had a chance to.

“When?” Echo asked

I turned to look at Rex, “Three days before the ceasefire announcement” a smiled graced my face, as his arm wrapped around me, pulling me in closer. I rested my head against his torso.

“It’s about damn time!” Ultimate shouted, followed by everyone’s uproarious laughter and clapping, and a hurl of congratulations coming from everyone. Followed by Rex and I getting swamped in hugs.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

The rest of the evening progressed with half of the people watching the holovid, the other half asking what everyone thought about the ceasefire, Wolffe was getting more and more annoyed he hadn’t had a chance to actually discuss anything with Mafs, he hadn’t even been able to send her a response to the message he received. From learning about Nerium’s test results, then the ceasefire, getting things prepared in the event the ceasefire failed, he hadn’t been able to thank her for the work she put in to save his jetpack.

Lief ran over to him, pulling on his pants. He looked down to the wide curious eyes of the youngling that seemed to be fascinated with everyone, “Yeah, kid?” Wolffe lowered himself till he was eye level with the youngling. He thought for sure the kid was going to get on his nerve, but when he met him, there was a weird connection of understanding between the two.

“Up” he held his hands up waiting for Wolffe to pick the kid up.

“Aren’t you tired of being carried?”

Lief simply shook his head from side to side, “Up!”

“Lief!” Mafs walked over when she heard her son demand being carried, she snatched Lief into her arms, feeling slightly embarrassed by her demanding son. “I’m sorry Commander” she turned to walk away, carrying him to the sofa.

“Wait” Wolffe rose from his kneeled position, looking at the woman who was incredibly intelligent and wasn’t afraid to stand toe to toe with him, he cleared his throat watching as her face took on a quizzical appearance as Lief lowered his head against her shoulder, his eyes slowly closing, “I …” he glanced over her shoulder to see Hardcase watching him carefully. Was there some form of understanding between them? Wolffe shook the idea out of his head, that wasn’t his business.

“You?” Mafs asked pulling him out of his distraction.

“I wanted to thank you for the work you did on my jetpack, not only repairing it but touching it up. It looks practically brand new. You didn’t have to repair it, especially since I just dumped it on your desk, and then …” Wolffe cleared his throat, thinking back to the anger she unleashed on him that day, “anyway, thank you.”

Mafs shifted Lief in her arms, Wolffe stepped forward taking him into his arms, as though it was the most natural thing for him to do, despite the fact it was the first time he carried a youngling or even held Lief. She was shocked and wasn’t sure what to do or how to react, “Uh … you don’t …”

“You repaired my jetpack, carrying him for you is the least I can do. After all we’re friends right?”

She simply nodded, before she walked over to Nerium. Wolffe watched as she mumbled something to her, she simply smirked and motioned to the hallway behind Mafs. He watched as Mafs motioned to him to follow her. Shifting the young boy in his arms and followed behind her.

“Nerium said I could use the guest room, which apparently doubles as Kix’s room. Did you know he stayed here?” Wolffe simply shook his head ‘no,’ how could he know? Why would he know? “Let me just make sure there’s nothing unpleasant for a child to see, give me a second.”

While she went into make sure the guest room was suitable, Wolffe turned to look at the pair of eyes that had yet to stop scrutinizing him, since he started talking to her. He narrowed his eyes toward Hardcase, tilting his head, asking him silently, yet firmly, what his issue was?

‘Don’t. Hurt. Her’ was all Hardcase mouthed.

Wolffe scrunched his face, telling his vod very clearly, ‘What are you talking about?’

Hardcase simply raised his eyebrow, as his face shifted, saying ‘Really?’

Wolffe rolled his eyes at the man, turning to face the guest room. In case, Hardcase missed what the rolled eyes meant, he hoped turning away from him would tell him loud and clear that he needed to shut up.

“Okay, all good” Mafs appeared in the doorway again, motioning for Wolffe to bring in Lief, the room was simple but cosy, and extremely clean, “Just place him on the bed.”

As soon as Lief, sprawled out on the bed, she grabbed a blanket and draped it over him, ruffling his hair, and placing a kiss on his forehead.

“Thanks for carrying him” she stated over her shoulder as she sat beside Lief watching him sleep for a bit longer.

“Like I said least I could do” Wolffe clenched his fists by his side, he kept hearing her words from that day playing over and over in his head, ‘How dare you!’ Should he apologize? After all she did apologize, but it still didn’t feel right. He had clearly overstepped. He cleared his throat, hoping to garner her attention one last time.

Mafs turned to look at him, surprised he had still been standing there, she had expected him to leave after he put Lief on the bed, “Something else?” Her voice was lowered hoping not to wake her son, who was clearly exhausted from using all his clone uncles as a climbing gym. Despite the amount of times she told him not to, Hardcase and Jessie kept goading her son.

“I wanted to apologize” Wolffe matched her tone.

“For?”

“For that day”

She crinkled her forehead trying to understand where he was coming from and why he felt he needed to apologize, “Wolffe, I apologized for a reason. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who was being overly sensitive, like I mentioned in my note.”

“I know …” his hand rubbed against his forehead, hoping the gesture would generate the words he needed, “however, I did overstep regardless. It was not my place to intervene.”

She let out a slight huff at his statement as she nodded, “You’re right, it probably wasn’t your place to intervene, however…”

She stood from her spot beside Lief and walked over to the man who was leaning against the wall of the room, “If you hadn’t - we would probably be having this conversation through a jail cell, and I’m quite certain Lief appreciates me being by his side and not in jail. You did the right thing, Wolffe.”

There was something about him that was so different from all the other clone troopers she had met, he wasn’t flirtatious just to get notches on his belt like most of the men she met, nor was he trying to be her friend just so they could reap some benefits whenever they were on shore leave. He was just him, not asking anything from her, not implying or demanding anything, he was simply just there. In a world, full of disingenuous flirting and comments, he was a breath of fresh air.

“I was …” she took the spot on the wall beside him, letting out a breath she had been holding in since her husband passed away, finally feeling for once she could be unguarded even just a little. Her eyes focused on her son, she was amazed how relaxed he looked, how trusting he felt, he had the softest smile on his face. She smirked at how much her son truly trusted not just her but the man beside her, and all in the span of an evening.

“It’s been a long time since anyone … specifically a man, has protected … no, that’s not correct, um … has defended me without any thought of reward. You even told me, via Hardcase and Jesse, to trash the jetpack, after you saved me. You didn’t want anything from me. You never demanded anything. Nor did you try to seek me out after what happened. You threw me off and I was … kerfuffled by your actions” she turned to look at Wolffe, there was a quizzical expression on his face.

“Kerfuffle?”

“Never heard that before?”

Wolffe shook his head ‘no,’ “Nope”

“Means to cause a commotion or a fuss”

“So I caused a commotion?” He smirked as he looked at the youngling sleeping soundly, he tried to remember if he had ever slept that well.

“You saying you didn’t?” She matched his smirk, he simply shrugged his shoulders, “You, confused me. Truthfully, I hadn’t realized how guarded I’d become, till after you left. It’s been so long since someone didn’t demand something from me as a quid pro quo, that when you stepped in all I could think about was how embarrassed I felt, and how often you’d bring it up until I repaid you for your ‘act of kindness’ towards me. I misjudged you. So, you see, there’s really nothing for you to apologize for. Others are at fault. You …” Mafs shook her head “not so much.”

“I hope you know, I just couldn’t stand there and not act.”

“I know. I realized that once I calmed down. Like I said, just not used to being looked after”

Wolffe glanced from Lief’s sleeping form to his mother, the more he looked at her, the more he realized how truly beautiful she was, how strong she was. Did she have to become strong or was she always this strong? She was a single parent, she had to do double the work. Putting herself through hell in order to look after her son, and her efforts showed.

He was a happy grumpy kid that Wolffe fully approved of, he’s not sure what came over him between looking at the sleeping kid and Mafs who looked ready to collapse, but for some reason his mouth opened up and his arm moved of it’s own accord, “Get use to it” was all he said as his arm wrapped around her shoulder pulling her into his side.

If it had been anyone else, she would have smacked his hand, punched him in his ribs, maybe even slapped his face, or kicked his knee out. However, somehow she knew he wasn’t trying to make a move, he wasn’t trying to be overbearing, he was just stating a fact and it … she couldn’t help chuckle a little as it warmed her heart.

She turned to face him, standing on her toes as she placed a kiss on his cheek, she’s not even sure where that gesture came from, but she hoped it conveyed her gratitude for having a friend like him in her life, “Appreciate it. Glad we’re friends now.”

She lowered herself and leaned into his side, the warmth from his body, the pressure from his arm, it provided a sense of relief and trust easing her into a sense of deliverance from the hard life she had been living these past years, a sense of peace she hadn’t felt in a long time.

He was a little amazed at her willingness to offer up such a tender gesture, as the kiss on his cheek, it left him speechless. Despite the fact his mouth may not be working, his eyes were ever vigilant as he watched her eyes began to droop, slowly closing as she leaned against him. The way her furrowed bro eased, how her body which was rigid and guarded, slowly relaxed against him. Soon enough, her soft snore filled the space beside him.

He chuckled at watching his friend fall asleep standing up, being held up by his body and his arm wrapped around her. When her head began to bob, he shifted till he was able to pick her up, one arm wrapping around her knees, while the other shifted from being wrapped around her shoulder to her back. He carried her over, placing her gently beside Lief, shifting the blanket till it wrapped around the both of them. He sat beside them watching as they curled into each other, a smile gracing his lips before he even realized.

Friends. He huffed at the notion that one simple word could bring a smile to his face so easily.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Izani watched as Wolffe carried Lief in his arms following Mafs down the hall, she couldn’t help smirk at Mafs willingness to let someone other than her pick up her only son, especially when he was already asleep. Ever since he was born she was always protective of Lief, and her protectiveness increased once Onem passed.

She shifted towards the kitchen to put her empty bottle in the reusable shifter, when her comm beeped, she pulled it out only to see she received a data stream.

‘The representative from Malastare is ready to meet with you Agent Izani’

She shoved the comm device back in her pocket and headed over to Nerium and Rex, “Could I pull the two of you away for a second?”

“Sure” they followed her easily enough out to the balcony, as they shifted among those watching the holofilm and the others who had fallen asleep.

“I have to get going, but I wanted to congratulate the two of you properly, and if you guys need anything, please let me know. I’m always here to help.”

“Thank you, Izani” Rex wrapped his arm around Neri’s waist pulling her into his side.

“Oh and Rex, you hurt her, I’ll hurt you, deal?” She held out her hand, true she wasn’t super close to Nerium compared to how close she was to Mafs, but she respected her a great deal, and for that alone she had her loyalty.

“Deal” Rex chuckled as he shook her hand.

“Give Fox some time Izani,” Nerium smirked, “You know, how head over heels for the Senator he’s been, ever since the first time he met her. However, I think he’s starting to realize she’s not the right one for him. So just give him some time.”

“Hmm” Izani fixed her hair as her eyes caught a passing freighter with a youngling’s face pressed against the window, waving madly at anyone and everyone they passed. She offered a wave back with a smirk at the youthful innocence, she focused back on the couple in front of her “Hopefully, he realizes before it’s too late.”

“What’s that suppose to mean?” Nerium looked suspicious.

“It’s nothing - - never mind, anyways, I have to go. Congratulations you two” Izani hugged Nerium and Rex before heading out.

As quickly as she could, she said her goodbyes, before she headed to the roof of the apartment building, where her speeder was parked.

“Where are you going?”

She closed her eyes, she was really hoping to avoid him, that’s why she exited as quickly as she could, she didn’t want to talk to him, she had successfully avoided him all evening and she wasn’t about to let all that effort go to waste. She didn’t stop, simply moved faster towards her speeder.

“We’re not even talking now? I thought you were my best friend”

A slight twing of resentment and guilt shuddered through her. It’s not that their friendship was over. It’s just she couldn’t bear to hear him tell her, the kiss was a mistake, he wasn’t into her as much as he thought, and he was going to stay with the Senator. If he were to utter those words to her now, she didn’t know if she could’ve survived.

Her hand rested against the handle of her speeder, her eyes focused on the ignition button, Gods how she wanted to press it, but she also wanted to look at him, she wanted to talk to him, she wanted to hear him being the gruff and annoyed Marshall Commander she’d known. Despite, the fact she kept yelling to herself to turn on the bike and take off, her eyes turned to look at Fox.

“What do you want me to say?” Her voice was resigned, exhausted, it was as though she had been fighting for months and was now completely spent.

“Anything?”

“You really want me to say anything…” her statement was cut by her comm beeping, she glanced at it, to see the data stream, ‘The Representative of Malastare is waiting for you at the designated location.’

She let out a sigh, she couldn’t be late, she had to meet the Representative “I can’t talk about this right now”

Fox knew that tone all to well, this was about a case. She was on a case? Maybe that dinner with Api really was for a case, maybe it wasn’t a real date. Fox allowed a glimpse of hope to glow in his heart, especially after what Nerium told him earlier in the evening, “What’s going on?”

“Meeting with one of your Senators”

“My Senators?”

“You know what you asked me to look into.” He nodded his head, he was going to ask which Senator, what she had found out, but she simply held her hand up, “I can’t talk about this right now, I have to go” with one quick flick of her hand, the speeder came to life.

“I’m sorry!” Fox shouted over the sound of the speeder.

Izani turned to look at him, his eyes said it all, he was going to take it back, he was going to tell her it was the biggest mistake of his life, “For?”

“Kissing you! I shouldn’t have done that.” Just like she thought, he was taking it back, “But I’m not sorry, for telling you how I feel.” She was shocked, her mouth gaped open, she watched as Fox stepped closer, closing the distance. “We should’ve talked before I kissed you. I’m sorry, I overstepped and ruined our friendship.” Fox’s throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed his nervousness, “I’m sorry for kissing you.”

Maker she really wanted to talk to him, she wanted to know exactly what he felt, how long he had felt it, but she couldn’t she had to go, the longer she looked at him, the more she felt her face flush and a smile appear on her lips, “I’m not!”

A smile spread on Fox’s lips, “You’re not?”

“No! Let’s talk more later!”

Fox nodded, as he watched her speeder take off. She wasn’t upset by the kiss, maybe she had feelings for him too, maybe it wasn’t all a lost cause, that realization alone made him happier then he had been in days. The smile that appeared at first only grew till it reached from ear to ear. He couldn’t wait to talk to her.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Izani arrived at the abandoned warehouse that had previously been arranged between the two of them.

There was always something eerie about a darkened warehouse, she walked through the warehouse her hands rested against her blasters. Keeping an eye out for anything to possibly strike out at her, she sent a ping to Api, just in case something went wrong at least he should have her location. It was a system they had set up a long time ago, and she was grateful they had.

“Agent Izani?” A small polished voice came from around the corner.

“Senator?”

“Oh thank goodness Agent, please come closer”

She could see the outline of a person, but something seemed off, maybe it was her paranoia or her years of field work telling her to stay vigilant “Why don’t we meet in the middle?”

There was a slight hesitation, before the polished voice agreed, and she heard the rustling of fabric shifting. She glanced around, her eyes taking in everything around the area, nothing seemed out of the ordinary, but that didn’t mean she was safe either.

“Before I begin, are you able to provide security for me and for my family? I can’t let anything happen to them. It’s not their fault I’m in this mess.”

“I’ll see what I can do, but I need to have an idea about what’s going on. You can trust me.”

“I’ve been told that before”

“By who?”

“Not all are as loyal as you, Agent Izani”

“Representative from Malastare, please tell me what’s going on”

“It’s fake.”

“What is?”

“All of it”

“I don’t understand”

The Representative stepped forward into the light, “That’s the point, no one is meant to understand. It’s all a trick.”

“It still doesn’t explain why there are threats against the Senators?”

“The threats are to keep certain ones in line for future votes, when they’re needed to be absent or they’re need to vote a certain way.”

“How do you know any of this? How can I trust what you’re saying?”

“There’s someone … “ before he could continue, some sort of metal fell and clatter against the floor just outside of the warehouse, the noise put them on edge and forced the Senator to leave sooner than expected, “I have to go” the Senator whispered.

“Wait” Izani stepped closer, pulling out her blaster in the event she needed to protect the Senator, “Just finish what you were saying!” Her voice lowered as she got closer to the representative.

He let out a sigh, “Someone in the Senate is working against us.”

“Who?”

He moved further away, heading towards his exit, “I’m sorry, I have to go” and just as quickly as he appeared, his outline disappeared into the shadow of the night. She moved to go after the Senator, when another clanking pulled her focus.

She moved closer to the noise, trying to find the culprit, only to discover a rather hungry looking tooka, “I see, so it’s your fault.” She chuckled as she scratched behind it’s ears, it simply leaned into her palm, purring quite loudly. It was a very unique looking tooka, purple with a scar above it’s right eye, and a jagged looking scar on it’s left front paw.

As she made her way back to her speeder, she couldn’t help think about what the Senator said, ‘It’s fake. All of it. Someone in the Senate is working against us.’

How could the Senator realize it’s fake? What’s fake? The war? The democracy? The Senate meetings? Is it just one thing? No. He said all of it.

Her comm beeped pulling her out of her musings, there was going to be a lot she needed to investigate “Izani”

“Iz, you okay?”

“Yeah all good”

“You sent me your location with no other information, what’s going on?”

“Meeting someone”

“There?”

She headed back to the main part of the city, keeping her eyes on the other vehicles, when she saw a transport closing the distance, “Yeah, but all good”

“Why don’t you sound good?”

She took a turn heading in the opposite direction she was originally heading, watching as the transport turned as well, “Api…”

“Iz? What’s wrong?” She took another turn, only to find the transport turn along with her. “What’s going on?” Api’s voice was full of concern at her lack of response.

“Do you remember the case that made me a Captain?”

Api was silent for a moment, his mind retracing the particulars of the case she worked with Onem. They had infiltrated one of the lower level underworld gangs, attempting to determine the rumours behind an assassination attempt on one of the Senators at that time. Onem and her were followed quite often and surveilled constantly, turned out the underworld gangs had united to become one unsavoury conglomerate of criminal activity, it was due to their work it became disbanded, “All too well, there was never a shortage of reports filling my desk from you and your partner regarding that case.”

Izani looked back to see not just one transport, but now two following her “I have a feeling you’re going to be inundated again. Do you remember how many filings I owe you?”

He searched his head, filings? It was a code word they used when one or both parties were unsure if they were being tracked. She had shadows following her, “One, wasn’t it?” Api hoped it was only one shadow following her.

“Pretty sure it’s two … although now that I think about it, it might be three”

“Really, three?”

“Looks like it”

“Need assistance to get those filings done?”

“I think I’ll be able to finish it, I’ll let you know if that changes”

“Keep me posted.”

“Will do”

Izani hung up the comm, taking turn after turn, doubling back, and heading further away from her actual destination. She headed towards one of the underground highways, using the smugglers tunnel to hideout from the three transports, she parked her speeder behind a pile of transport crates long forgotten. She pulled out her blasters just in case and waited another five minutes after the last transport passed. She inched closer to the exit of the smugglers tunnel, waiting to see if they double backed. When they hadn’t she turned around and used the tunnel to take her back to the downtown core of Coruscant.

She doubled back on her route a few times to make sure she wasn’t followed, once she was fairly certain she was in the clear, she headed straight to the Senators’ Guard headquarters. As soon as she entered her office, she began looking over all the reports relating to any of the Senators, even the Chancellor. She was swamped with paperwork, when her door chimed, she glanced up to see Api standing at the door.

“You could have called when you got back. I was sitting upstairs in my office for the past hour worrying, wondering if I was going to get a report of a missing agent or a dead body found on the street”

“I’m sorry. I literally just walked through that door ten minutes ago, and just dived into some research.”

Api let out a sigh as he took the seat in front of her, “Listen, even though it didn’t work out between us, I still worry about you. I hope you know that.”

“I do and I appreciate it. I’m sorry things didn’t work out between us”

He nodded, giving a soft smile, “It’s okay, at least we tried. Anyway, tell me, what’s going on?”

“I don’t know. I learned something that I don’t think I wasn’t suppose to …”

“What do you mean?”

Izani rubbed her forehead, could she trust Api with this? Fox? “Nothing, just tired. Anyway turns out the Senators are being threatened depending on the circumstances.”

“Circumstances?”

“That’s all I was able to figure out so far, not who or why - - I’m thinking it has to do with an upcoming bill or meeting. The way my source talked it sounded as though they’re being threatened to stay away on specific days, but not all of them, just certain ones.”

“In order to avoid passing the bill or to make it impossible to bring a new bill to the floor”

“Exactly”

“Who do you think’s behind it? Separatists?”

“Who else would gain any benefit?”

“What are you going to do?”

“Contact the Jedi Council, they’ll be able to help me determine who is behind the threats”

API simply nodded, “Well I’m glad your safe”

“Me too.” However, I have a feeling that’s not the last I’ve heard about this. Especially, if what the Senator from Malastare said was true, what if it’s all fake?

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 2 years

Text

Upside Down - Ch. 30

Summary: Fox has to decide what he wants.

A/N: Hello lovelies,

I’m back from vacation! Yeah! It was a stay-cation, but I did have a lovely spa day, which was absolutely needed.

This chapter and next chapter is very Fox-centric, for all you Fox fans. There is a bit of Riyo x Fox, but I did want to put it out there, although I do ship them, this is not a Fox x Riyo story. It’s my own take of Fox x Riyo, and so it may not make some of the diehard FoxRiyo shippers happy, and for that I do apologize.

We will be getting back to Nerex, Quinlan Vos and the likes after the Fox set-up arcs, but it if it helps Chapter 29 and 30 happy at the same time, just in different locations of Coruscant.

Also please note Riyo Chuchi is OOC, but I needed to write her this way in order to make sense for the story going forward. I’m sorry! I do love Riyo, I think she’s the sweetest, unfortunately, I couldn’t write for this story.

Warnings: mentions of lost kid and finding kid, mentions of getting yelled at, flirting, angst, hints of jealousy, mentions of decommissioning, getting annoyed with flirting directed at someone other than SO, and I think that’s it, if I miss any warnings please let me know.

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SENATOR

Fox was losing his mind, he’d spent the better part of the morning with Mas Amedda, who was quite adamant the lax security from his guards were the reasons for the recent Separatist attacks in the capital. He was told in the most adamant and most … oh hell, his ass was chewed out by that no good pompous second in command Mas Amedda.

He scrubbed the blaster in his hand harder, as he thought of all the ways he could have shot him. Sniper shot, right through his knee, he would take his time, and make the man suffer limb by limb; or he could short out the platform he and the Chancellor used to hover over the other Senators, taking care of two of his biggest headaches. There was always the option of poison, clean easy route.

“Marshall Commander” the soft voice that reached his ears, made him nervous and even tighten his nerves even more than it had been.

Fox looked up to the person standing at the door, he stood, holstering his blaster, dropping the rag on to the table in front of him “Senator Chuchi, how can I be of service?” His smile widened at seeing her beautiful golden eyes, her delicate features, despite the months that passed since the last time he saw her, he felt his heart flutter and butterflies begin to stir in his stomach. He bowed his head towards her, showing the respect he held for her.

“I …” her hands fidgeted against her robes, she stepped closer to the Commander, lowering her voice, “I happened to overhear Mas Amedda’s discussion with you.”

He had to chuckle a little at her statement and how pathetic his own emotions were.

Discussion, the most tactful and polite way of saying that Amedda’s blood pressure must have shot through the roof when he finished his tirade regarding the ‘lack of security’ on Coruscant, “Then no doubt, you also heard how I restrained myself during that ‘discussion’.” He responded matching her tone, as she matched his smile.

“When?”

“When I allowed that man to finish. Alive and still breathing. Notice how you didn’t hear any gurgling sounds coming out of his mouth.”

“Oh” she giggled at his little joke, Fox couldn’t help it despite the fact it didn’t work out between them, she was still the most beautiful woman he ever had the privilege of guarding. She glanced from him to the door, “um … would you mind closing the door, there’s something I was hoping to discuss with you in private”

“Sure” with one movement he pressed the button on his vambrace closing the door behind her, he hated those stupid door switches on his desk, they were such an inconvenience.

“Thanks”

“No prob” he cleared his throat, motioning to the seat beside him, she smirked remembering all the previous times she had sat on that same couch, the laughter, the teasing, the flirting, not to mention the tears they shed together. He took his seat, waiting for her to take hers, it felt like old times to him, but he had to be careful, or he’d end up in the same place he was only months before, “What seems to be the problem, Senator?”

Riyo hated how formal he got since things between them ended, “Fox, we were together for almost a year, can’t you just call me Riyo”

He wanted to, maker how he wanted to call her Riyo, to wrap his arms around her, but their relationship was different now, and calling her Senator was his way of reminding him not to cross that line, “You are a Senator, I’m a soldier. I have to treat you with the same respect as any other Senator.”

“Any other Senator, wouldn’t be alone with you in your office”

“That’s because we’re friends; that gives you a special privilege”

“Fine, I’ll accept it, for now.”

“Why don’t you just tell me what’s going on?”

- - - - - - - - - - -

“How’s it going, Izani?” Hound called out to one of the Senate Guards still in service, there was a rumour that eventually they’d be replaced by the Coruscanti Guards, but that hadn’t come to fruition yet as a few Senators didn’t like the idea of having clones guarding them.

“Well I found the missing kid”

“Dead or alive?”

“Alive, thankfully. Turns out the kid wanted to see a holovid” Izani rubbed her forehead, “I guess the parents misunderstood as to who was going to pick him from his friend’s place and he got the bright idea of running around Level 2353.”

“Dumb kid. Though in fairness if no one was watching me right now, I’d be off galavanting too”

“True, but that’s why you have Grizzer, right?” She kneeled down to pet the massiff beside Hound, “Who's a good boy?” She rubbed his belly, as his tongue rolled out, “I have a treat for you” she reached into her back pocket pulling out some dried up meat.

“See now why is it that Grizzer gets all your love and attention?”

“Grizzer’s not the only one, I shower all of you with plenty of love. Hence why I have a pack” Izani patted the bag beside her.

“Oh and what’s in there?”

She smirked as she cleaned her hands from Grizzer’s drool, she reached in pulling out a small brown flimsi package, “I got these as a thank you from the family, and they also wanted to show their appreciation to the entire Coruscanti and Senate Guards for being of service, so I have enough for every one of you pains in my butt”

“Well at least it’s a lovely butt”

Izani chuckled as she stood, passing Hound the packages for him and his squad, “It’s a good thing you’re cute”

“Well, if you ever wanna explore that cuteness, you know where to find me.”

“Oh I do, anyway, I’ve come to talk to the big boss, he in?”

“Yeah. You know the way” he motioned with his hand for her to head on in.

“Oh I do” she kneeled down scratching Grizzer’s head one more time, leaving a kiss on his head, “Goodbye, my sweet beautiful boy,” his butt wiggling from side-to-side, “anytime you wanna leave him and come live with me, you just say the word.”

“Can I come too?”

Izani simply shook her head, waving bye to Hound as she walked further into the Coruscanti Guard station, leaving the packages of treats along the way, receiving her thanks from the various guards on duty, and promises to leave enough for those off duty, though she doubted it.

She reached Fox’s door eventually, knocking once as was her custom before opening it, expecting to see him sitting behind his desk, an angry scowl on his face and thirty datapads in front of him, or sitting on his couch cleaning his blaster for the millionth time.

However, the site in front of her made her stop dead in her tracks, as she slowly took in the familiar face of Senator Chuchi sitting beside Fox, holding his hand as his other hand cupped her cheek stroking the apple of her cheek slowly and delicately. “Oh, I’m … I didn’t … Excuse me, I’ll come back later.” She moved to exit his office, pretending to be blind to what she saw, ignoring the odd sensation in her chest.

“No, it’s okay, I was just leaving” Riyo called out to the woman, who had been part of the Senate Guard for the last ten years. She remembers Izani when she first started coming to Coruscant as a fairly new Senator, and now here was the woman running her own ops, having her own cases, she was privileged to know her.

Izani noticed as Riyo stood from her seat, she let go of Fox’s hand reluctantly, thanking him for listening in her soft, gentle and sweet voice, so different from her own voice. Maybe she was trained to speak in such a soft amiable manner or maybe it was due to Izani’s own career choice that her voice had more of an authoritative tone and not the soft caring dulcet tones the Senator seemed so easy to be able to portray.

She was just heading out of his office when she stopped just in front of Izani, giving her a warm and charming smile, “It’s been a while, how are you, Captain?”

“I’m doing well, Senator Chuchi. Thank you for asking.” She bowed her head probably a little too quickly, but still making an effort to show respect to the woman who had Fox’s, “How are things going in the Senate?”

“Making progress day-by-day”

“That’s great to hear, hopefully that means this war will be over soon” Izani was thanking the heavens, the stars, and anyone else that she remained in parade rest with her hands behind her back. The Senator wouldn’t be able to see the clenched up fists, that were simply dying to make a point of impact with that pretty blue face, even though there was really no reason for her to inflict any kind of pain on the woman, after all that was Fox’s decision, and it seemed he didn’t care. There was that sensation in her chest again, what the hell was that?

“One can hope” Riyo looked back once more at Fox, smiling, “Thank you once again.”

“Anytime, Senator” Fox bowed his head to her, as she walked out of his office and down the hall. He knew without having to look at Izani, there would be a scowl forming as soon as the Senator vanished from view. He raised his head again, running his hand over his forehead and down his cheek over his mouth. “Don’t Iz” was all he said as he moved over to his desk.

“Oh, were you under the impression I was going to say something?” She motioned towards herself, “No. No. Why would I say anything about the woman who ripped out your heart, stomped on it with her teeny tiny feet, and then decided to throw it in a blender? I mean, just because I walked into your office, and found you two sitting on the couch, with you cradling her cheek, while she held on to your hands for what looked like dear life itself, why should I say anything?”

“Okay, you made your point” he held up his hand.

“No. I’m serious” she moved further in, tossing her pack down on the chair in front of his desk, irritation laced throughout her tone, “why should I, the one who listened to you complain for … hmmm, let me think two … four months of you crying your eyes out, sobbing into my shoulder when you found one of her hair ties or when you saw her going on a date with another Senator, should have a say in anything?” She roughly threw open her pack, grabbing the food containers for Fox’s lunch and tossed it on his desk, placing a package of the treats she had been handing out, along with a cup of her special caf.

“I’m sorry”

“No, you’re not.”

“You’re right, I’m not” Fox let out a frustrated growl, as he arranged the containers in front of him, it had become a routine of theirs to eat lunch together, often times it was the only meal he really had time for, and it worked because of her busy schedule, she understood why he had to eat at odd times due to the nature of their work. Actually, she understood him a lot better than some of his vode.

Yet, as he watched her set up her own containers, he couldn’t help feel guilty about the way he told her not to stay anything. “I’m sorry for being rude, and dismissing your … you know”

“Feelings? Opinions? Notions of sanity?” She quirked one eyebrow, as her eyes flooded with the annoyance she felt.

“Yeah, that”

She simply shook her head, as she took a bite of her sandwich, “What did she want anyway?”

“Some of the Senators’ families have been receiving threats, a poor attempt of trying to control the Senate, at least that’s my opinion. She was asking if I could look into it, apparently you lot” he motioned with his hand towards her, “the Senate Guard, aren’t taking the threats seriously, or barely moving to investigate it.”

“This is the first I’m hearing about it. I know there’s been a lot more Guards getting sent to the lower levels lately, but other than that …” she shrugged, shaking her head.

“Do you know why they’re being sent?”

“Something to do with civil unrest, but seeing as I’m in a different department, I have no clue”

“Can you find out?”

“Yeah. I could probably ask Api”

“The guys who’s being asking you relentlessly on a date”

“Well, here’s a way to get rid of him once and for all, and get the information I need, right?”

“Whatever” the idea of her spending time with the man didn’t sit right with him, his annoyance showed as Fox took a bite of his sandwich. Despite the aggressive way he tore into his sandwich, he had to face the truth he revelled in how the taste of the meat combined with the various sauces she placed in it, along with some sort of vegetable, made his stomach happy, even his feet curled at the joy of his food. He’d never admit it to her, but he loved her cooking, his lunch time meal was the one thing that made his day, especially after Riyo and him went their separate ways.

“Can I ask you something?” She took a swig of her caf, washing down the sandwich she took a bite from. Fox simply shrugged his shoulders, that was the most answer she was going to receive, but it was all the permission she needed “Are you okay after seeing her?”

Fox’s hands stilled, lowering the sandwich, as the piece he had been slowly chewing finally went down his esophagus. “Honestly, I don’t know. She’s …” he let out a frustrated sigh, as his hand rubbed against his exhausted eyes, “She's still as beautiful as ever, as kind and sweet as ever. Sitting with her on the couch felt like old times, I just wanted to scoop her up in my arms …” he simply shook his head, disappointed in himself, “I don’t know.”

“Did she say anything?”

“She wished things had turned out different. She misses me. She still has my body suit top, and some extras that I had left at her place. She said if I wanted to she’d be willing to give it another go, see if we could fix where we went wrong.”

Izani was shocked by the last part, that woman had the audacity to show up, ask for help and then told him flat out she wanted to give it another go. Even to say ‘where we went wrong,’ is she serious! When Fox went above and beyond to make things work between the two of them? Ugh! She didn’t say anything, she simply looked away from Fox, as she took another bite of her sandwich, this one a more forceful bite.

“You’re not going to say anything?” Fox asked as his eyes lasered in on her face.

Izani simply wiped her mouth, taking a swig of her caf and shrugging her shoulders, “What’s the point of me saying anything”

“You always have a very vocal way of providing your opinion”

“And you have a very deaf way of not hearing it, so what’s the point. You’re going to do whatever you want to do, and …” she let out a sigh as her back hit the backrest of her chair, “And whatever you decide I’m here for you, plus I don’t want to look like the moron when you two get back together” she finally let out as she looked him in the eye.

“You mean it?”

“Yeah. However, that being said I will give you a moment of advice take it however you want, okay?”

Fox simply nodded his head as he continued to eat his sandwich, Izani thought about how she wanted to present the advice, she took in a deep breath, moving aside the container of food as she rested her arms on his desk.

“I know what she means to you, Fox. I’m not stupid enough to think you’ll just forget about her. However, the reason you two broke up in the first place was because she couldn’t handle it, don’t get me wrong I get it. It’s not easy to be in a secret relationship where the other person could literally end up dead, simply because someone found out. That being said, if she truly makes you happy then go for it, but only if she’s able to handle it. She knows better than anyone else, nothing has changed with regard to clone rights; so what makes her think she can handle this now that she couldn’t before? Personally, I suggest you ask her, why she feels she can handle it now as oppose to four months ago, because if you guys start down this road and if she feels she can’t handle it again, you are the one who will have the hardest time moving on. You’re my best friend, Fox, and I don’t want to see my best friend hurt.”

Fox didn’t know what to say, he always just assumed they were colleagues who highly respected one another, but the fact she saw him as her best friend threw him. No one ever told him they didn’t want to see him hurt, Riyo had stated on a few occasions she wanted to see him well, and in one piece, but never flat out saying she didn’t want to see him hurt. He felt this was the perfect moment to tease her, though he probably shouldn’t “Aww Iz, you really care about me, don’t you?”

“Fine” she grabbed the container with her barely eaten sandwich, and shoved it back in her bag.

“What are you doing?” He was shocked by her sudden demeanour, why was she packing up?

“Leaving”

“Why?”

“Why not? You clearly aren’t going to take what I said seriously”

“You said, I could take the advice any way I choose, and I’m choosing to ignore it.”

Izani stilled her hand, she closed her eyes regaining her sense of calm, “Sorry. You’re right” she opened her eyes, Fox couldn’t help but notice they were filled with resignation and sadness, “I told you, you can do whatever you want with it.” What she really wanted to say, was she now could see how much he valued her opinion, but what was the point of pressing the matter further.

“Iz …”

“Either way, I have to go” she cut him off, she didn’t need to hear whatever excuse he was going to use. He was going to go back to Riyo, and she was going to break his heart again and she would be the one left to pick up the pieces.

He knew she was lying, but something told him not to call her out on it. He wished he could do something to convince her he did value her opinion, but that would mean moving on from Riyo and he wasn’t sure he could do that, yet “Wait, you haven’t even finished your lunch, at least have a few more bites”

She shook her head no, “It’s okay, let me see what I can find from the Senate Guards, regarding the threats. Those blue armoured jerks better do something for their pay. I can’t be the only one working.”

“Agreed” Fox smirked towards her as he fidgeted with his container, trying to align it properly with the desk, “Are we okay?” Maker he hated how he sounded, he didn’t know why but for some reason the idea of having Iz mad at him, or sad because of him wasn’t sitting right within him, was it because she had been a really good friend to him these past few months? Someone he could rely on? He could be open with and know it would stay between the two of them? In fairness, this wasn’t just these past few months, it had been that way between them ever since the day they met and she showed him the ropes of the office, and what to expect from the Coruscant bureaucracy.

Izani looked at Fox doing her best to give him a convincing smile, she’s not even sure why the idea of him being back with that woman didn’t sit right with her. Okay, yes she did end up hurting Fox but maybe it wasn’t intentional or maybe it was, she couldn’t tell for sure. Riyo didn’t appear to be a cruel hearted person, and she seemed to really care about the people of the Republic, yet … the way she ended it with Fox never sat right with her. “Yeah, Fox, we’re good. Like I said, I just got to go, and it’s my fault I didn’t eat more since I spent more time arguing with you than I should have,” she offered as she tilted her head.

Fox nodded, he didn’t want to make her feel bad or anything, he wanted to persuade her to stay there with him but he knew that would be a fool’s errand, “All right, well thank you for the meal, and for the treat” he held up the bag of treats she had left for him.

“You’re welcome, although the treats came from the missing boy’s parents.”

“You found him then?”

“Yup. Safe and sound. Another happy ending”

He didn’t miss how her smile wasn’t a full one, or the fact that it was the smile she gave to those in authority over her when she couldn’t really express how she was feeling. He didn’t know why but he was getting irritated by the way she was distancing herself. He didn’t say anything, really what could he say?

He wished he could just push his feelings for Riyo away, but he couldn’t. No matter how hard he tried. Really, why should he feel guilty for having feelings? Why should it matter if Iz was having a hard time with the idea if they got back together? Why was knowing his decision could affect his relationship with her bothering him? Not to mention what was this uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach?

Izani stood from her seat putting on her pack, “I guess I’ll see you later” she gave a soft smile before she moved from in front of his desk. She knew she shouldn’t have said anything with regard to Riyo, didn’t matter how she felt about the situation, what matter was Fox deserved to be happy. Especially, since everything always rested on his shoulders, she stopped at the door to his office turning to look at him, “I’m sorry for what I said.”

Fox wasn’t sure if maybe he was imagining this, was she really apologizing?

“It shouldn’t matter to me who you decide to love, and my opinion doesn’t matter. If you want to get back together with Riyo than … and not that you need it” she quickly clarified, “you have my blessing and support. I want you to be happy Fox, whether that’s with her, some other Senator, or whoever, but just …” she bit her the inside of cheek thinking of what she wanted to convey, “whatever decision you make” she looked into his eyes, hoping to convey her sincerity, “please make sure that it’s because you want it and it’ll make you happy, not because you think it’s what you’re suppose to do. Okay?”

He wasn’t sure what to say, he was about to talk when he realized he still had a piece of sandwich in his mouth, he quickly chewed it, swallowing it, before he looked into her eyes, “I promise Iz. I’ll do what makes me happy.”

She simply nodded, “I am sorry”

“I know. Don’t worry about it, I know you said and felt what you did because you care about me, and if you tell anyone I said that I’ll kill you” he smirked at her hoping to get her to laugh a little, she only gave a slight chuckle, before he looked down at the remnants of the sandwich that she had made, he looked up at her again, “Will … um … will I see you tomorrow?”

“Probably not, have to finish my report, and see if I can dig up any information on those Senators.” He nodded as he took in what she said, understanding what she was really inferring: she needed an extra day to deal with her emotions and reactions, “However, my comm will be on, so feel free to comm me if you need to talk or whatever” she offered another smile, while her hand pressed on the button to open the door.

“All right, take care of yourself Iz, see you in a few days.”

“You too” she walked out the door fighting back the tears that had been wanting to spill, why was she so upset? So what if Fox went back to Riyo, if that’s what made him happy, wasn’t that a good thing? Why did it bother her to see the two of them together? Was it out of a sense of loyalty? Was it because she knew how much Fox had suffered when Riyo called it quits? She hadn’t felt that strongly before when her other friends got back together with their exes, and why did it bother her that he barely reacted at the idea of Api constantly asking her out?

She wiped a stray tear as she headed out to the main gate, she kept her head down, she didn’t want anyone to see her emotional. She had worked hard to be taken seriously as a Senator’s Guard, she didn’t need that being undone simply because she didn’t understand herself at that moment.

Hound and Grizzer were still there at their post, when Hound noticed Izani walking past them, yet she didn’t have the same contented air she had when she entered “Izani?” She didn’t answer as she walked past “Izani!” Her head stayed down, but he noticed how her shoulder flinched a little, “IZANI!!” He walked with Grizzer over towards her, she had stopped finally at his final call, she slowly turned to face him. Hound stopped almost mid track as he noticed her glistening eyes, and the tear streaks down her cheek.

“Izzy what’s wrong?” He closed the distance between them, pulling her over to a more secluded spot, where no one would be able to see her. He commed for someone to watch his post, while he dealt with a ‘sensitive matter.’ He didn’t need the rest of the guys to know he’d found her crying.

“He’s …” she shook her head, she couldn’t believe what she was about to say, “he’s going back to her.”

“Who?”

“Fox”

“Going back to who?”

“Her”

“The Senator? The one who broke his heart? The one who basically said she couldn’t handle the pressure of dating him, that one?” She couldn’t answer, simply nodding her head up and down, Hound tried to reason within himself that maybe her intel was wrong, maybe she was mistaken in some way, “Are you sure? Maybe ….”

“I walked in on them sitting on the couch together”

Hound was grateful for his helmet he wasn’t sure if she would appreciate the sarcastic look he had on his face at the moment, “Ummm … I’m not trying to downplay your feelings, but …” he nibbled on his lip fighting back the laughter as her eyes narrowed on his visor, “so they’re sitting on a couch” he shrugged, “so what?”

“He was holding her hand” again he shrugged not understanding the significance, “while he cupped her cheek” Hound simply smirked, “Ugh, you’re not getting it, okay here” she took his hand recreating the scene as best she could, “they were like this” she held his hand, placing his hand on her cheek, as she drew him in a little. He could feel his heart beat quicken, his eyes took in every aspect of her face, and he couldn’t help glancing down to her lips, maker he wished he took off his helmet …

“Oh! I get it!” He pulled his hand back, stepping away from her a little, so it didn’t feel as though he was crowding her.

“You know I feel sorry for your girlfriend. Does she know you flirt with anything that walks by?”

“Listen, first off I don’t flirt”

Izani popped her hip out as she crossed her arms, quirking her eyebrow at him, “Really?”

“I pay compliments, not to mention as long as I dock my speeder in her garage that’s all that matters.”

“Maybe that’s all that matters to you, but let me explain something to you about women, it does matter where you get the fuel for your speeder. It may seem like no little thing to you, but it does make us feel unattractive and used.”

“She doesn’t feel that way”

“Have you asked her?”

“I think we’re getting a little sidetracked. We were talking about the boss, so just because he may have paid her a little more attention, doesn’t necessarily mean…”

“She said she wanted to try again”

Hound simply nodded his head, “Yeah, he’s getting back together with her. Still why does it bother you so much? I mean it’s not like … oh! You do, don’t you?”

“Do what?”

“You like him”

“What! Are you crazy?”

“Then why cry about it?”

“Cause he’s my friend, my best friend, thank you. I don’t want to see him hurt or taken advantage of; I already had to see him get over her once, I don’t want to go through that again.”

“Who’s to say they’ll even break up again? It could work this time, they each learned what to do and what not to do from last time, isn’t that a possibility? And this is the big guy, so do you really see him being taken advantage of? If he does let someone, then maybe he wants to be taken advantage, if you catch my drift”

“A blind person could catch your drift” she rolled her eyes at him, as he snickered, “I don’t have feelings, I just care about him”

“As more than a friend”

“No”

“Yes”

“Ugh, you are so wrong”

“Again I ask, then why cry about it? Why worry they might get back together? If he’s happy and they make it work this time, isn’t that a reason to support him?”

“They’ll break up”

“How do you know?”

“Because nothing’s changed”

“You don’t know that, you aren’t in their relationship.” Hound let out a sigh, as he petted Grizzer, “Izani, listen, I think you’re sweet and kind, and well hell, you’re hot. However, that being said, this isn’t about you, it’s about them, and if you’ve never told him how you feel, how do you expect him to react to someone who does?”

“I don’t have feelings for him”

“Then it won’t bother you if they end up having kids”

“You know what, I have to go”

“Oh because you have feelings for him”

“Aren’t you supposed to be on guard duty or something?”

“You mean like guarding the gate to your heart because you have feelings for him”

“You’re such a di’kut”

“You’re the di’kut in love”

“Who said love? And furthermore, I do NOT have feelings for him!”

“Okay” Hound held up his hand, “You don’t have feelings, you simply care about your friend so much that you cry over the possibility that he could get hurt by someone he truly deeply cares about, even though there’s a great chance they won’t break up again. Cause, you know, that’s normal.”

“You know what I have to go, and thank you for being a giant pain” Izani kneeled down scratching Grizzer’s head beside his ear canal, “Grizzer, please tell your father that he’s a giant pain in my ass” she whispered, the giant massiff licking the side of her face as a big grin settled on it’s jaw. She placed a kiss on the top of his head, before she stood and headed off to the Senate Guard offices.

“Hey” Hound held on to her arm before she decided to take off, “all kidding aside, if you ever need to talk or go out for a night on the town, I’m your guy, okay?”

“Thanks Hound” she placed a small kiss on his helmeted cheek, patting his cheek before heading off.

“Grizzer” Hound looked down to his sidekick as soon as she was out of earshot, the lovable massiff looking up at his guardian, “I don’t know what the di’kut ori’vod (idiot older sibling) is thinking, but if it were me, I’d choose her” he motioned towards Izani’s retreating form, “every time. Wouldn’t you agree bud?” Grizzer jumped up on all four wagging his body to and fro in agreement.

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 2 years

Text

Upside Down - Chapter 31

Summary: Izani makes a decision

A/N: Hello Lovelies

I’m so glad you all loved Izani, she’s an amazing woman and I hope to portray that as much as possible. Don’t worry Nerex is still there, they’ll be coming back, but let’s give them a chance to enjoy married life without us intruding on their life right now.

Don’t forget Riyo Chuchi may be OOC, so please be kind.

So I’ve been thinking about how the story is progressing, and now that I have a somewhat clear direction, there will be stories from the TCW series that will be skipped. Plus since there’s not a lot of the 104th stories in the series, I shall be taking some liberties with those stories.

Don’t worry it’s all leading somewhere.

I think.

Anyways, LOVE OO!

Italics - flashback

Warnings: mentions of threats (vague), feelings of confusion, awkward flirting, police procedures, discussions of date, fluff, angst, kissing, arguing, sensations of not being good enough, clone prejudice (hinted), I think that’s all of it, if I miss any please let me know.

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DINNER

“Api” Izani was getting exasperated with the man in front of her.

“All I’m saying is that we’ve received quite a few complaints filled lately, I haven’t had a chance to go through them all to assign them.”

“Well,” Izani rubbed her forehead, good lord if this wasn’t for Fox, she’d just get up and walk away, “I just finished a case, so my docket’s free, want me to take it for you.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, why not?”

“Aren’t you behind on your cases?”

“Like that’s stopped anyone from assigning more cases”

“True” Api went through the datapads on his desk, pulling out the one from the Senators, “All right, well there’s really not much here” he stated as he scrolled through the datapad, “from what I can see a few of the families of the Senators received threats. Nothing tangible. Some notes left stating there will be further contact in the future, in the meantime it would behoove them to take care of their loved ones, stuff like that.”

“Behoove? Seriously?”

“Not lying, it actually says behoove on one of them”

“Can I take a look?” Api nodded as he handed the datapad, “It seems as though there is no pattern to the threats. Do these Senators all vote a certain way?”

He took a moment watching Izani, “Tell me does your brain always work that fast?”

“Helpful when you’re on your own in a seedy part of Coruscant”

Api smirked at her, he had heard she was an amazing investigator, brilliant strategist, he not only heard but had seen it, not only did she have a brilliant mind, but she was beautiful too, inside and out, often times the victims she helped would come and show their gratitude towards her diligence and kindness towards their investigation. With each passing day he had gotten to know her, his affections grew, and before he knew it his mouth took over, “Have dinner with me tonight”

Izani stilled, she didn’t want to move or acknowledge what he said, it’s not that he wasn’t attractive or a good investigator, or even a good man, he was all those things. Treated her with respect when many of her previous supervisors only deigned to give her any sort of investigation, but the idea of changing the relationship they had to a more intimate one, unnerved her more than she cared to admit, she cleared her throat focusing on the datapad, “Did any of the victims submit any of the notes?”

He felt the disappointment settle within him, he’d asked her out three times before, and he promised himself he’d ask her out once more and if she refused this time he wouldn’t broach the subject again, regardless of how much his heart pleaded with him. “Um …” he held out his hand for the datapad, looking up the case reference, “I know we received some, but I haven’t had a chance to really review them, wait one-second” he stood heading towards the evidence storage room.

She wasn’t sure what to do, after all Api was quite respectful, he was kind, funny in his own way … but he wasn’t Fox. She couldn’t believe that notion flew through her mind, what kind of ridiculousness was that, of course he wasn’t Fox, how could he be. Fox was … Fox was … she let out a resigned sigh, Fox was charming when he wanted to be, funny, prickly, grumpy, stressed, worried, overtaxed, under appreciated, but despite what the Chancellor and Mas Amedda put him through, whenever he saw her, he always had a smirk on his face telling her he was happy to see her.

Despite all that, the image of Fox’s face as he looked at Riyo came flooding to her mind, the way his eyes held so much affection and respect for the woman, the way his hands touched her ever so gently. The soft smile that was on his face as he looked at the Senator. How his cheeks had a deeper hue just from the close proximity of being with her.

Ugh! Why did it bother her so much?

Why did she care if he ran off with that woman?

She was a kind Senator, a good person — except when it came to Fox. A strong and noble person, who had strong morals and cared for her people. Someone who was worthy to be by Fox’s side.

Then, why did it feel like a betrayal knowing he’d be returning to that woman?

She was nothing to Fox, that much was evident by his response earlier.

“Here it is” Api’s voice pulled her out of her musings as he handed her the evidentiary data recorder, she nodded her thanks as she pulled up the image of the notes.

“Hmmm”

“See something of note?” He had a smirk on his lips, one thing he loved was puns.

“Well done, very punny.”

“I knew you’d appreciate my humour” he chuckled, “but in all seriousness see anything of interest?”

“Not necessarily, but I’ll have to take my time with this. Is this everything?” She motioned between the datapad and the recorder?

“Everything I have”

“Huh” her eyes kept roving over all the information that was before her.

“Does this mean you’re officially taking on the investigation?”

“Yeah, put me down for it”

“Done. I’m sure the Senators will be glad to know someone’s taking their case.”

“No prob” she stood putting the two objects in her pack, her leftovers from lunch still sitting there at the bottom of her bag, the argument she had with Fox flooding back in her mind. What was she doing? Was Hound right? No. She didn’t have feelings for Fox, she was just an overly concerned friend. If that was the case then why didn’t she want to go out with Api, after all he was her type, if she even really had a type. He’s not Fox. Ugh! That’s … she closed up her pack with a resolution in mind.

“As for dinner” she turned to look at Api, as she shouldered her pack, “why not in two days?”

Api was shocked, did he hear right, “Two days? Dinner? You and me?”

“You don’t want to?”

“No, I do. You do realize I asked you on a date, right?” He needed to make sure he understood where her mind was.

“I know, so what do you say?”

“Yes!” Api’s face flushed at his enthusiasm, “I mean, yeah, I would love to” was this really happening? “Want me to comm you with the details?”

“Yeah, that be great” she smirked, “but if something major comes up with the investigation …”

“Don’t worry, if that happens I’ll understand, we can easily reschedule for another day, or we could have lunch together or something.”

She couldn’t help the smile that appeared, maybe this was better, he wasn’t Fox - not that that mattered — but he was a good man, “Then I look forward to hearing from you” she nodded her head and headed out.

If Fox was able to go back to Riyo, then she could certainly give Api a chance, after all the scumbags and criminals she had to deal with on a regular basis, it be nice to spend time with someone who was a good man.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Mafs are you seriously saying you want me to bring Api to tag along when we go to dinner at Nerium’s place? Especially since tonight’s our first date! Let’s not forget there’s no guarantee I’m going to go to Nerium’s” Izani quirked her eyebrow at her friend, as she went over some interview notes.

“Pleeeease!” Mafs was not one to beg, but she would if it meant making Izani cave, “I’m bringing Lief, and you know he asks for you every chance he gets, always wondering about daddy’s partner”

She giggled thinking about the little womp rat, “How old is he now?” The smile on Izani’s face was only meant for Lief.

“Just turned five, can you believe it?”

“Wow, I still remember the night he was born, man Onem was going crazy trying to get to you. I think he even threatened one of the doctors at the hospital. It took all of my strength to keep him from killing the nurse barring his entrance”

“I remember, he told me.”

“Can’t believe it’s been three years” ‘since he passed’ was the unspoken words passed between the two.

Mafs let out a sigh as she glanced over to the holopic of Onem and Izani from their first day as partners, “It seems so long ago when you guys first became partners.”

Izani followed her line of sight, “Yeah. He was the best partner I ever had, never made me feel I wasn’t capable simply because I was a woman, or questioned if I was thinking logically or emotionally. He was a really great guy. I miss him.”

“You don’t want another partner?” Mafs looked at her friend again, amazed at her authoritative presence but yet had such a delicate side to her, a side many didn’t see.

“Ugh! Seriously? You know how much I would have to break them in, get them trained to all the best food spots, all the contacts I have” she shook her head as she looked at her notes, “No, thank you.”

“Then since you don’t have a partner, you could probably use a night out right? A night to relax, have some fun?”

Izani glanced over to her friend, who had the most innocent expression possible on her face, “Fine, but I’m not bringing Api”

“Why not?”

“Because this could be our first and only date”

“Then go on your date, tonight, and if everything goes well bring him to dinner”

“Bring who to dinner?” A voice called to them from Izani’s office door, Mafs turned to see quite a striking man, he had dark blue eyes, a smile that weakened her knees, and dark copper hair.

“Api” Izani nodded to the man, “something I can do for you?”

He stepped in walking over to her desk, nodding towards the woman sitting in front of his guard’s desk, “Hello, ma’am, I’m Api, Marshall Commander of the Senator Guards” he held out his hand to the woman who he deduced was Izani’s friend.

“Pleasure Marshall Commander, I’m Mafs, friend of Iz’s.”

“What’s this about a dinner?”

“Oh, a friend of ours is having a dinner party, so I’m trying to convince her to join me”

“Why don’t you?” Api glanced towards Izani wondering why she wasn’t saying anything.

“I am, that’s not the problem” she couldn’t help locking eyes with the man, he was quite good looking, “was there something you needed?”

“Yeah, but I can come back…”

“Oh, no need” Mafs offered, standing from her seat, “I have to get going. Iz let me know if you are going to come, maybe we can travel together to her place.”

“All right, I’ll comm you tomorrow”

Mafs nodded accepting Izani’s statement, “Nice meeting you, Marshall Commander. Please make sure she’s well taken care of” she motioned toward her friend. Api simply nodded, smiling in agreement.

Once it was just the two of them, Api turned to look at Izani, “I wanted to ask if you were ready for our dinner tonight?”

“I’m waiting to hear back from one Senator, but somehow” Izani glanced to the chrono on her desk, “I don’t think I’m going to hear back from them, since it’s already 20:30 hours.”

“Hmmm, which Senator?”

“The Senator from Malastare”

“We could always swing by on our way to dinner”

Izani looked at her notes, she already left two messages, stopped by the man’s office, all in one day, “No. I may have already showed my hand, let’s leave it for now. Let me finish up, and I can be ready to go in ten”

“Sounds good” he smirked, he reached out to hold her hand, except he noticed how her hand tightened around her datapad, and her arm jumped at his action. Instead he placed his hand on the desk beside her arm, not wanting to push, “I’ll let you wrap things up, I’ll meet you downstairs, is that okay?”

“Yeah, that be great” Izani was hoping her relief wasn’t evident on her face, Api stood, offering one last smile, before he headed out of her office. The sensation of uneasiness was building in her chest when he came closer to her, she shook her head, what was wrong with her? Okay, so he wasn’t Fox, but he wasn’t a bad guy, why couldn’t she just relax around him? Despite the fact that she had an idea as to why it bothered her, she ignored what her mind was telling her and chalked it up to nerves.

- - - - - - - - - -

“Riyo, you look stunning” Fox took in the Senator’s outfit, the golden dress similar to the colour of her eyes hugged her in all the right areas. He was wearing his dress uniform, it felt odd to be so dressed up, but for her, he’d deal with any discomfort.

“You look just as handsome” a smile etched across her face, as she took in her date. He offered his arm for her, “Always the gentleman” she teased as she took his arm.

“For you? Of course” they had agreed to meet close to the restaurant. Despite the fact she looked stunning, despite the fact his heart was beating quickly by being in her presence, in the back of his mind he kept hearing Izani’s voice ‘what makes her think she handle this now that she couldn’t before?’ He’d been wanting to ask, but somehow he knew if he did, it wouldn’t be the answer he was hoping for. ‘I don’t want to see my best friend hurt’ ugh! Why wouldn’t her voice leave him, and why now, during the date?

“You okay?”

He looked at Riyo, “Yeah, why?”

“You appear lost in thought”

He’d hoped she hadn’t noticed, he wasn’t about to tell her the reason he was lost in thought was because he was thinking of what some other woman had mentioned, he shook his head, “Just thinking about a case, sorry. I’m here.”

“Good, because I pulled some strings for us to eat here” she smiled as they stood in front of one of the most exclusive restaurants on Coruscant.

“Riyo, this is …”

“The owner owed me a favour, and no one will say anything about the fact you’re … you.”

Fox stopped in his steps, turning his body to look at Riyo, “What do you mean I’m me?”

“You know”

There it was, there was that sensation that never sat quite right when he was with her, and it was rearing it’s ugly head again. It’s not that she was prejudiced, not by a long shot, but she did value public opinion more, and as a Senator he could understand why she felt that way, “Riyo, there’s something I’ve always wanted to ask and never got a chance to before”

Riyo watched Fox’s expression, did she say something wrong? It wasn’t easy for someone like her to date a clone, there were more eyes on her, people watching who she spent her personal time with. Standing in front of a very exclusive restaurant, would lead to reporters camping out, waiting for the opportune moment to take a pic. She didn’t want Fox to suffer because of her, “Fox, maybe we should talk afterwards, is that okay?”

He let out a sigh but nodded, “Yeah, of course. Wouldn’t want to be late for our reservations, right?” He smiled, pushing aside the uneasiness that was beginning to rear its head, ‘it’s not easy being in a secret relationship where the other person could literally end up dead.’

As they entered the restaurant, he wondered if he could put Riyo through that again, the worry, the stress, the constant threat looming over head like a vibro axe ready to fall. Maybe he was the one being selfish in wanting to be back together with her, but she did make him happy. ‘I want you to be happy … whatever decision you make, please make sure that it’s because you want it and it’ll make you happy …’

He followed the host who directed them to a corner table, he noticed it was a darker corner than the other areas of the restaurant, no windows in and around the area. Right. That’s why she didn’t mind going to a restaurant, because no one would be able to see them together here.

His hand clenched against his thigh, why the hell was it bothering him so much? This never use to bother him before, he remembered the numerous times they would go to the most unknown or seedy restaurants as she dressed in disguise so they would go out for their date, or the amount of times they stayed indoors for their dates, because she felt uncomfortable being in public. He was being ridiculous, this is what he’s been wanting, another chance with Riyo, so why couldn’t he just be happy.

“The food here is really amazing” her voice cut through his own thoughts, pulling him back to where he was.

“What do you recommend?” He glanced at the menu, he had to stifle a laugh at the title of some of the dishes, if Iz was here with him, she would be making jokes at some of the names. Maker, why did his mind keep going back to her!

“The owner recommended the Mando-riding noddles”

“I’m sorry, the what?” Fox tilted his head towards Riyo, he couldn’t have heard right.

“That’s what they’re called, the Mando-riding noodles”

Fox blinked a few times as he processed the name, really fighting the urge to laugh at the ridiculous name, when a laughter he knew all too well filled the restaurant from a table over. He was positive, he had been mistaken, after all why would she be here?

“Oh look, Izani’s here” Riyo had turned her head to the sound of laughter that filled the restaurant, it was a fairly loud cheerful laugh that seemed out of place in such a restaurant “Wow, she looks great, so different from her usual outfit.” She couldn’t help notice how Izani’s hair was quite long, longer than she realized since her hair was always in a bun, it was gathered all to one side, wrapped over her shoulder. The outfit she wore was feminine and very becoming on her as well, quite different from the usual Senator Guards’ uniform she wore on a regular basis. “Her date is quite good-looking too” she kept filling the silence between her and Fox; she noticed how he didn’t react, simply narrowed his eyes at Izani’s table, “Fox?”

“Hmm” he looked from Iz to Riyo, “Sorry, what?”

“You okay?”

He glanced quickly from Riyo back to Iz, why was she here with Api? Why was she laughing at his joke? Why was she dressed like that? They must be here for work, that’s it! She’s here on a stakeout, maybe pretending to be on a date in order to tail someone. He shook his head, paying attention to his date once again, “Sorry, yeah. It was weird to see them here”

“I didn’t realize she was dating anyone”

“Oh, I don’t think they’re dating” his voice lowered, “I think they’re here for work.”

Riyo glanced back over to the two, she noticed the nervous smile on Izani’s lips, the way she kept fidgeting with her hair, how the man with her was trailing his fingers over her hand. It was all quite intimate. They had barely glanced at anyone except each other, it was as though they were in a world of their own, “I may not know what working as a Senator Guard looks like, but I know what it looks when two people are on a date. Those two” she motioned with her finger, “are on a date” she couldn’t help smile at watching the woman she knew for so long enjoy her evening. She deserved it, she worked harder than anyone she’d ever known before.

At Riyo’s statement, Fox reexamined the table where his best friend sat. Taking in every minute gesture, every smile, every glance between the two. How did he miss it? Those two were on a date! Wait. Maybe they had to appear as though they were on a date. Yeah! This was a stake out, and they were very good at their job, that’s what it was.

“Fox, you keep staring at them and you’re going to make them uncomfortable” what she really wanted to say was he was making her uncomfortable.

“Sorry, you’re right” he refocused on Riyo, “so what should we order?” He kept pushing the knowledge that Iz was there with Api out of his mind, forcing himself not to look and keep focus on the woman in front of him.

“I’m going to go with the Bantha tartar on a bed of Pantoran rice.”

“That sounds great”

“What are you going to get?”

“I’m going to get …” his thought never finished as Iz’s laugh reached his ears again, he tightened his hold on the menu, focusing on the dishes in front of him. “I’m going to …” again her laugh broke his concentration, for kriff’s sakes, what was wrong with him!

“I could recommend something if you are having trouble” Riyo offered as she gave him the loveliest smile he’d seen on her face.

“There are so many dishes that look amazing, I can’t decide which one I want to try” he matched Riyo’s smile, hoping to focus back on the here and now, despite the fact all he really wanted was one of Iz’s sandwiches. Wait … didn’t she say she was going to be busy with the case regarding the threats the Senators’ received. That’s right she said, she’d ‘have to … dig up any information on those senators …’ Of course! That’s why she was here! A place frequented by Senators, it made sense. It was definitely not a date.

“Ah, Monsieur Api, a pleasure to see you here, and who is this charming date of yours?” Fox peeked over from behind his menu, he noticed how Api took Iz’s hand in his, in response to the woman who stood by their table.

“This is Captain Izani Asal, a brilliant woman and detective, she’s one of the Senators’ Guards.”

“Mademoiselle it is a pleasure. You have a good man here” she placed her hand on his shoulder, “I have known Api since he was a youngling, his mother and I were great friends.”

He saw the smile that etched across her face, why was she putting on such an act? Come on! It wasn’t necessary to make it seem like they were really on a date.

“Do you have any holo pics from when he was a kid, something I could tease him with?”

“Most definitely…”

“Not!” Api cut her off, “You don’t have any” he drew a straight line mid-air with his free hand.

“Api, you are not a Jedi” the older woman smirked, “and don’t worry Izani, I’ll make sure to send you a copy of some very adorable pictures. Also, don’t worry about the bill, dinner’s on me tonight.”

“Oh we couldn’t…” Iz started, but the older woman simply shook her head, reiterating she wasn’t going to take no for an answer, and simply walked away promising to take care of the bill. Izani simply tilted her head at Api smiling, “You are quite surprising, you know that?”

He simply shrugged his shoulders, “This may be our one and only date, had to pull out all the stops.”

She smiled as she bit her bottom lip, nodding, “Good call. Excuse me, I just need to use the refresher for a quick sec”

“No worries, take your time. I’m not going anywhere” Api wanted to cherish this moment with her for as long as possible.

Fox watched as Iz stood from her seat, and headed towards the refreshers, this was his chance, maybe he could help her during this stakeout, “Riyo, I’m just gonna use the refresher real quick, why don’t I take you up on your offer and you just surprise me with whatever you recommend.”

“All right, I’ll make sure to find the best thing for you” she felt her face flush as she took in the man who was impossible to give up. No matter how scared she was about their future, or how uneasy she was being with him in the public eye, she couldn’t give him up.

He simply nodded and headed to the refreshers, he stood in the hallway in front of them waiting for Iz to come out. Maybe this was wrong of him, maybe he should just focus on Riyo, but until he knew the real reason she was here with him, he wouldn’t be able to sit there and give his date his full attention. Gods, why couldn’t he just forget that Iz was there with Api?

“Fox?”

He glanced up to see Iz’s eyes watching him, taking him in, he felt his heart quicken, a cold sweat break out down his spine, his hands began to feel clammy. “Iz” he nodded, “thought you were busy with the Senators” he didn’t understand why his voice was fully of annoyance, where was this coming from?

“Excuse me?” Her eyebrows rose against her forehead as she tilted her head to him, was he seriously asking her why she was there?

“You heard me, you couldn’t see me today because you were busy with the Senators”

“Yeah, I was and now I’m not” she shrugged her shoulders, “Why do you care if I’m here?”

“You’re here because of a stakeout right?”

“What?” She was seriously confused by this conversation, “Are you drunk?”

“No” Fox was taken aback by her question, why would she think he was drunk.

“Why do you think I’m on a stakeout?” Her eyebrows furrowed as she tried to follow the conversation she was having.

“Why else would you be with Api?”

She glanced over to the main dining hall, as she shifted from in front of the woman’s refresher, “Because we’re on a date.”

“No, you’re not” Fox shook his head not accepting the answer, “You can tell me the truth, I’m here to help.”

“Fox, with all due respect, what the kriff are you talking about?”

“The fact you and Api are clearly here on a stakeout for the case”

Izani tilted her head back looking to the ceiling as she took in a deep breath, “Fox, this isn’t a stakeout”

“There’s no way you’re here with him”

“Come again?”

“You wouldn’t date him”

“Oh I wouldn’t?”

“No. You couldn’t”

“Now, I couldn’t? Is this because of what I said regarding Riyo? Listen, you made your choice, otherwise why would you be in this fancy-ass restaurant dressed to the nines if you were not on a date with her.”

“That’s neither here nor there”

“No. I think it’s right where it should be. Why do you care?”

“What?”

“Why do you care if I’m here with Api? You’re here with Riyo focus on her” Izani stepped away from their hidden corner, her intention was to walk back to her date, when Fox’s hand wrapped around her arm, pulling her back.

“I would love to focus on my date” he seethed out, “problem is I can’t get your kriffing voice out of my head, and then to make matters worse, your kriffing laugh keeps pulling me from my date.”

“And somehow … what? That’s my fault?”

“Yes!”

“Explain this to me, how is you not able to focus on your date, my fault?”

“Why did you have to say all that stuff before?”

“All I did Fox was point out the obvious, and if I remember correctly, didn’t you tell me, ‘I’ll do what makes me happy’ so go. Do what makes you happy.”

“That’s what I’m trying to do”

“Then go back to your table” Izani motioned with her hand back to the dining hall, “you choose to ignore my advice, so choose to ignore me and my date.” She pulled her arm out of his hold, as she moved away from him.

Fox watched in slow motion as she pulled away, as she started to walk away. A sensation of fear gripped him from within in, how could she just walk away? How could she seem fine when he felt as though his heart was breaking inside? How could she say she wanted to see him happy, but didn’t care that she was making him miserable?

“You’re really fine if I go back to Riyo and enjoy my date, it doesn’t bother you?” His voice was sharper than any two edge blade, and driven straight at her.

Izani stopped, she had barely moved away from him, she turned to look at Fox, she couldn’t understand him. “Fox, you made your choice. In fact, you were very adamant about trying this again with her, regardless of what I had to say. So why does it bother you so much that I’m here with someone?”

Why did it bother him? Why did it bother him that her smile and laughter was for Api? Why did it bother him when he saw Api caress her hand? Or the ease of conversation between the two? Why did it bother him, that Api was a better man than him? Shouldn’t he be happy his best friend was with someone who knew how to treat her properly? He could never bring her to a place like this on his own. He could never afford the dishes that were offered.

“If you’re not going to say anything, I’m heading back to my table. I personally think you must be concussed, maybe you got hit on the head today. It’s the only logical explanation for you to be acting so off. Fox, make sure to avoid drinking any alcohol, it won’t help if you are” he watched as she turned away again, but something inside him told him he couldn’t let her go. He couldn’t just let her walk away without her knowing. Without her realizing the truth.

In that moment, he had no idea what came over him, as he grabbed her hand pulled her back to him in one motion. He cupped the back of her head and planted his lips against hers, kissing her with all the passion he felt in that moment for her, it took her a second before she began kissing him back. He didn’t break the kiss, or stop, even as her back bumped against the wall. He couldn’t stop himself, as this overwhelming urge of desire made him deepen the kiss.

Izani was shocked, she never expected this reaction from him, never imagined in her wildest dreams that he would take the initiative like this or even kiss her on the forehead. Yet, despite how much she wanted to continue the kiss, she kept thinking of the fact there were two people waiting for them in the dining hall. She pushed Fox off, as she wiped away the evidence of their kiss.

“What the hell are you doing!”

“I … I couldn’t …”

“Riyo is out there waiting for you! You made a promise to her to give it another go, and you have the audacity to try and kiss me?” Her anger was bridled as her eyes narrowed on him.

“You kissed me back”

“You kissed me first” her anger dissipated.

“You pulled me in”

“You pulled me in first” her eyes soften as she took him in.

“Well you ran your hand through my hair” Fox rested his hand by her head.

“Well … your hand went from the back of my head to my lower back” Izani’s voice became quieter as she took in Fox’s swollen lips as the tension began to grow again.

“You wrapped your arms around my neck” Fox took a step closer leaning in.

“You deepened the kiss” she leaned into him as well.

“You tilted your head so I could deepen the kiss” his thumb trailed along her bottom lip.

She shook her head stepping away from him, “We can’t do this”

“Why not?”

“Because you and I are on a date with two other people. It would be dishonest to them, and to ourselves. I won’t do that to Api or Riyo. He’s a good man and she’s an exceptional woman.” She walked away from him, “I’m going back to finish my date, I suggest you do the same.”

“We have to talk about this?”

“About what Fox? Can you really see us together? Do you even really have feelings for me, or is it because you don’t want to lose your best friend? You’ve never shown an ounce of inclination towards me in all the time we have known each other, so why now? Hmm?” She ran her forefinger over her lips, wiping away the evidence she felt was still visible, “You don’t want me Fox, you just don’t want anyone else to have me.”

“That’s not true”

“Then why at this moment did you choose to do something? Why not the other day when I left your office?” She shook her head, “I’m sorry Fox, but what you’re feeling right now isn’t because you’re interested in me. You’re just confused” she didn’t wait for his answer as she headed back to the dining hall.

He didn’t know what to say, was she right? Was he simply confused? Was this all a big mistake? He threw himself against the same wall he had pressed Izani into, running his hands through his hair. What was he feeling?

Izani pushed the tingling sensation of Fox’s mouth against hers out of her mind. She wasn’t going to tell Api what happened, that wouldn’t be fair to him, and it wouldn’t be right. It would simply be her hurting him for the sake of hurting him. Yet, all she could think about was the way Fox’s hands felt against her body, how his body pressed against hers. She shook her head, pushing those thoughts aside, as she retook her seat, smiling at the date she wished was someone else.

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 1 year

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Upside Down - Chapter 35

Summary: Nerium learns about a new power; Mafs tries to find a sense of normalcy; Vi gets a checkup; Wolffe has a one-on-one with Plo’buir.

A/N: Hello Lovelies,

Well my arm is feeling A LOT better; I've been doing some exercises, the pain is almost non-existent, the issue is more my two fingers they’re still numb, less than what they’ve been in the past few weeks, but still there. All in all I believe I’m on the mend.

This chapter is more of a set up with regards to the later half of Season 2 of The Clone Wars.

Thank you all for loving this story and sticking with it.

Love OO.

BOLD - COMM

Warnings: animosity from a mother; discussions alluding to adoption, infidelity; mentions of children being removed from their homes to train with Jedi; locking down a room; discussion of past incident on Naboo, Sith attack; discussion regarding force powers; discussion of keeping things on secret; mention of a spider-roach; feelings of anxiety; feelings of being overwhelmed; discussions of death; discussions of PTSD, trauma, pregnancy; flirting; one-sided feelings, I think that’s everything, if I miss something please let me know.

AO3 Link | Words: 5,803 | Previous - - - > Next Upside Down Master List | Main Master List

AWAKENING

Quinlan looked at his padawan, as they retook their seat after straightening up the room, there were so many things he could say, so many things he probably should say, yet he was still shocked by the sheer power that came from her. The information she told him, regarding where she entered, the golden pool, the bright light, the images, seeing Captain Rex there, it was overwhelming for him, he couldn’t even imagine how overwhelming it must have felt for her.

“Did you ever have any idea your mother …” he cleared his throat, “Wasn’t your birth mother?”

Nerium simply shook her head, how could she could know, it wasn’t as easy as some would think, “I knew there was always some animosity from her end, I just never imagined it was for this reason.”

“Do you think your father had an affair?”

He watched as she shrugged her shoulders, he could understand her anger, her resentment, there wasn’t much he could offer in regards to comfort, “Nerium as unfortunate as it may be, I think you need to speak with her”

Her eyes widened as she took in what he said, “With my estranged Separatist mother, who is also Count Dooku’s partner? That’s who you think I should speak to?”

“No, with the one that appeared in your vision”

“Why? She’s not my mother”

He simply nodded as he sensed the growing uneasiness coming from his padawan, “I can sense your uneasiness, my dear, however, you must understand, getting the information from her will open up your understanding to who you are.”

“Why should that matter? I know who I am”

“Understanding where we are from, helps us to understand our connection to the force.”

“How does that help? Aren’t Jedis taken from the families when they’re mere children? Do all the Jedi children know where they are from?”

“Yes. Maybe not the family, but their culture, the planet where they were found, most Jedis do know that much of their history and it helps them, helps them to understand how to use the force, how it flows through us.”

“Are you saying it flows differently in everyone?”

“We are all unique beings, would it not make sense that we also feel the force differently? Though we may all follow the Jedi code from a certain point of view, how the force flows in us is unique to each individual, for example, I have the ability to use psychometry. It gives me the ability to sense the memories of other beings by touching objects they have come in contact with.”

“That’s why you’re such an excellent tracker”

“Thank you for stating the obvious. Let’s not forget devilishly handsome”

Nerium looked at him with an exasperated look, as she narrowed her eyes, “I think you need a second opinion on the handsome part, tell me are you always this sarcastic?”

“When the occasion calls for it”

“So all the time”

“Yeah pretty much. Getting back to the discussion at hand, every Jedi has a different ability that connects us to the force, Obi-wan has that annoying ability to control animals, which in some ways can be helpful. Not to mention the fact that he always thinks he’s right. Regardless, everyone develops abilities dependent on how the force flows through them.”

“What about what I saw, they were things I’d never seen with my own eyes. Even Rex’s armour, it was an older model, but I’ve never seen him in that outfit.”

“You may have the gift of foresight. However, what you described could be a force power that has been theorized, in fact many thought it was something impossible.” Quinlan took a moment to decide if he should inform his padawan of the dangers that surrounded her, “Nerium, only a few in the entire galaxy know what I am about to tell you.”

He moved his hand over a grate on the floor, it slid back revealing a panel. With speed and familiarity he moved his fingers quite quickly pressing a number of buttons, only stopping once the sound of shutters sealing shut, doors locking, even vents shutting echoed throughout the room. A light appeared from the centre of the ceiling, sweeping the entirety of the room, from every angle possible, when two beeps chimed at its conclusion. He refocused his attention on his padawan, the look on her face was one of pure nervousness, “You appear nervous”

“Shouldn’t I be?”

“We must take these precautions because of the sensitivity of what I am about to tell you”

“Which is?”

“The ability you mentioned, when Rex showed up, what were you thinking?”

“Ummm nothing”

“Nerium” Quinlan’s face showed he didn’t believe her in the slightest, “I am not like those other Jedi, I’m a fan of not following the Jedi Code to the letter. I’m a disruptive influence, I believe Master Krell once told me quite adamantly. Sanctimonious cea (prick - Huttese). Anyway, what I’m trying to say is you don’t have to hide the truth from me. I can already sense your attachment to Captain Rex, and as you can see it doesn’t exactly affect my ability to teach you. Therefore, be honest and tell me truthfully what you were thinking.”

She simply nodded, as she took in a deep breath, “I was thinking that where I was, was so peaceful and rejuvenating he could benefit from experiencing it. It reminded me of being in his arms, feeling safe and loved, that’s when he appeared before me.”

“Could you see anything or anyone else around him?”

“No, it was just him. It lasted for all of a few seconds, maybe a minute or two at most.”

He simply nodded, “Did you two speak?”

“No”

“Make contact of any sort?”

“We simply locked eyes, and I laughed thinking how crazy it was to see him, I closed my eyes for a brief second and when I looked back he was gone.”

“Did Rex ever mention anything regarding the force or …” he moved his hand about, “anything like that?”

Nerium rubbed her forehead, “There was an incident after we found the laboratory on Naboo, Rex had some sort of Sith attack”

“Really?”

She rubbed the back of her neck, avoiding his eyes, “I may have um …” she cleared her throat, “Awoken his midichlorians, inadvertently.”

“Interesting” he shifted on his seat, “This may explain why he was able to appear. The force power you mentioned is one that’s very rare and barely seen in the universe, as I stated previously. The only sentient beings I have ever heard of having this sort of power are the Aing-Tii. A secretive set of alien monks from a world within the Kathol Rift.”

“How do you know about them, if it’s so rare and they’re so secretive?”

“Must you question everything?”

“Must you avoid answering the question, again?”

“Let’s just say there’s a reason I’m usually given solo assignments that no one talks about”

“What does that mean?”

“It means even the Jedi have black ops”

“Seriously?” Nerium gave him a look that was full of disbelief, however her face changed to one of understanding once she realized he wasn’t telling her a lie or another sarcastic remark. Quinlan could sense her discomfort through the force.

“Did you think the Jedi didn’t perform such acts?”

“Well … I …” she let out a sigh, “I just don’t understand, aren’t Jedi’s keepers of the peace? I mean isn’t that what you guys are always spouting?”

“Yes, and sometimes keeping the peace means taking action in the shadows; far from the eyes of everyone else.”

“How is that just? How is that …”

Quinlan held up his hand, “As much as we may want to delve into this particular topic, we need to focus. Nerium if the power you have is the one I am speaking of, it is a very dangerous power, and no one. I mean no one, must know you have this power.”

“Why? I don’t understand what’s so wrong with what happened”

He rubbed his face, as he thought of the best way to break the news, “You have the ability to see the future and the past. The future is always in motion and what we see is only a glimpse of a potential future. However, seeing the past … interacting with the past could have ramifications that could affect the whole galaxy. You need to be careful, if people learn you have this ability, you won’t be safe anywhere.”

“Then what about talking to my so-called mom?”

“I sense that she’d actually be the answer to a lot of your questions, and may in fact help with your ability. You said she appeared after Rex showed up, right?”

“… Uh, yeah”

“Then it might be that she may have the same ability or has the power to connect with you over great distances.”

“Are you saying she’s still alive?”

“I don’t know. It could be that subconsciously you wanted to connect with her, and you were able to connect with her past self or possibly she sensed your ‘awakening’ and was able to forge a connection from her current location.”

Nerium appeared frustrated and exhausted, as she took in everything Quinlan mentioned, “Do you really think I could affect the past?”

“It’s a theory. Honestly …” Quinlan dragged his hand over his face, hoping the force would answer some of their questions, “there isn’t a lot we know about this particular force power, what we do know is minor, a drop in the ocean. The Aiing-Tii would have a better understanding, but they are a closed community, and understandably if they possess this power. Let’s be careful, I’ll do some more digging around.”

“What should I do in the meantime?”

“Meditate, practice your stances and carry on with your medic duties. We can’t let anyone know you’re training with me, and we need to keep this quiet for as long as possible, if the wrong people hear about it …”

“It could be dangerous”

“Not just for you, but for all those who you love. Attachment can be a dangerous thing”

“Yeah … why is that?”

“It’s a weakness. An opportunity that allows the dark side and your enemies to exploit.”

“That said anything can be a weakness”

“True, but most things can be hidden within yourself, it becomes a weakness when you can no longer control it; attachment is something we cannot control.”

“Because it depends on the other person”

Quinlan nodded, “Let’s end our lesson here for today. I will contact you for your next session, in the meantime follow along with your duties, and whatever else is requested of you.” He turned off the lock down and stood from his seat, brushing off the imaginary dust, he glanced over to her, “Oh, one final thing”

“Yes, Master?”

“Just because I may approve of your attachment with a certain Captain, doesn’t mean everyone does. Therefore it’s important that you keep your relationship on a need to know, and try to maintain distance from one another as much as possible.” He could see she was about to argue with his statement, “At least for now” he interrupted her before she said anything, “until we are able to figure out what exactly your powers can do.”

She let out a sigh nodding, knowing that Rex would definitely have something to say; especially since they barely saw each other in the past week.

- - - - - - - - - - -

Mafs looked at the apartment the Coruscant Relocation Administrator suggested, it was in a shady part of Coruscant, on sub-level 3456. If it was just her, she wouldn’t have cared so much, but for her and Lief, there was no way she would let her son stay here.

“I know this isn’t probably what you were hoping for”

“Considering my other place was bought by my husband and I, where we built years of treasured memories and full of love, not to mention it was a lot nicer than this place. Yeah, definitely not what I was hoping for!”

“Mrs. Rahta …”

“How many times have I told you to call me Mafs. Just call me Mafs, don’t want to mistaken for my mother-in-law”

“Sorry. Mafs, you don’t have to take this place, the compensation for your apartment is coming, it’s just …”

“Slow as molasses, as to be expected from any government office.”

“I’m sorry”

“No you’re not. If you were, you wouldn’t have shown me this place” just as she said that a small spider-roach ran across the floor, “Nope. Nuh-uh. No. No. No.” She pointed to the small critter and walked out of the apartment, shaking the imaginary bugs crawling on her skin.

“I’ll keep looking.”

“Yeah, you do that” her tone was exasperated, it had been a difficult month a half since the incident, especially for Lief. He was away from his friends, from his school, from his routine.

“Listen, I’m doing my best okay” the Administrator turned to look at her, “You think it’s easy, trying to find suitable apartments for everyone that was displaced! I have been working around the clock doing the best I can, but does anyone appreciate it? No. It’s challenging to find apartments that don’t meet snippy and snide remarks.”

Mafs held up her hands in surrender, she closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, “You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just …” she looked at the apartment building and the surrounding area, “I can’t bring my kid here. I’m sorry.”

He let out a sigh, readjusting himself; trying his best not to let his frustration with others out on her, “I know, and I’m sorry. It’s not you, it’s … it’s everything.” He rubbed his eyes, his lack of sleep catching up with him, “I’ll do my best to try and find something more suitable for your family. Are you guys okay where you are staying now?”

“Yeah, I’m staying with my family; but that can only go on for so long.”

“I understand, listen…” he dug into his pocket pulling out a comm card, “this is my personal comm number, if you have happen to see a vacancy in an area that you like, let me know and I’ll talk to the owner. See if I can get you guys in there.”

“Thank you, Elprit” she took the card, feeling ashamed about how she reacted earlier, “I’m sorry, I know I was being a grade A b…”

“Burdened down mother,” he smirked, cutting her off mid-word that no doubt she had intended to say, “just let your husband know to keep an eye out too. If both of you are looking it’ll be easier to find something sooner.”

“It might be, but … um … he passed away.”

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t know. Was it because of the …” he motioned with his hands not wanting to talk about the incident, in case it was too fresh in her mind. Although it definitely made sense why she was on edge if that was the case.

“No, years ago. He was a Coruscant Guard.”

“I’m sorry to hear that; if there’s anything I can do, please let me know.”

She was taken aback by his offer, sure they had talked a handful of times, after he was assigned to her, but this felt different then just friendly conversation. “Thanks, I have a few friends who are helping.”

“Well doesn’t hurt to have one more helping” he stepped closer to her, “especially when that person doesn’t want to see you have to struggle anymore.”

“Elprit, I …” before she could say anything further her comm beeped, she looked at it, to see Wolffe’s number appear, “I’m sorry, I need to take this… excuse me.”

She stepped aside, hoping to have some privacy, “Wolffe?”

“Hey Mafs, just checking in on you. I remembered today you have the apartment viewing. How did it go?”

Things between the two had been awkward and different since he rescued her, not that she didn’t want him around, or didn’t appreciate the shoulder he offered her, but it was a bit overwhelming. After everything that happened, she couldn’t handle their friendship turning into anything more, not that he said anything about how he felt, nor was he likely to, after all it was Wolffe.

“I saw a spider-roach”

“Well that ended the tour quite quickly, I imagine”

“Very”

She heard his chuckle, which warmed her heart in an odd way that she didn’t want to deal with, “I’m sorry, Mafs. I don’t mean to laugh, but I can just imagine you freaking out. Anything I can do to help?”

“No. It’s okay. Elprit is …”

“Elprit?”

“Yeah the Administrator assigned to my case. I’ve mentioned him a few times I think. Anyway, he gave me his comm link and said if there’s a place I ending up seeing available and like, he’d try and get us in.”

“I see” Wolffe didn’t say anything for a bit, “I’m glad you found someone you can rely on.”

Mafs was shocked by how hurt he sounded, “Wolffe?”

He cleared his throat, “I’m sorry, I have to go. Something’s come up. Take care, Mafs”

“Wolffe, wait …” he didn’t stay, the comm ended before she could find out what he was implying. She wasn’t relying on Elprit, she was just grateful someone was going to be able to help her and Lief. Shouldn’t he be happy about that too? He said he was her friend, so why couldn’t she have someone to support her?

“Mafs?”

She turned to look at Elprit, he looked as though he was trying hard not to pay attention, “You heard?”

“Sorry, I really tried not too, but you just happened to stand in a very echoey area.”

“It’s okay” she shrugged her shoulders and rejoined him. Wolffe was an issue all on his own, and not something to focus on when dealing with apartment hunting.

They had been walking in silence, after leaving the apartment complex, there were a million questions running through Elprit’s mind, but the only thing that came out of his mouth were two words.

“Your boyfriend?” He glanced over to her, hoping he hadn’t shot himself in the foot; after all it wasn’t his business who she was talking to; but it seemed as though she hadn’t heard, she looked deep in thought, as they made their way to the lifts.

“Hmm” she glanced up to him, “Sorry what did you say?”

“That guy” he motioned with his head to her comm, “your boyfriend?”

“Oh, uh … no. Just a friend. Good friend, but a friend” It felt like she said friend way too many times.

The doors on the lift closed as they stepped in, the air between them was awkward and tense, it reminded her of her younger days, when a boy tried to flirt with her, but didn’t know what to say. The silence lasted only for a short while until Elprit shifted so he could face her.

“If I were to ask you out, would that be okay?”

She glanced up to Elprit, “What?” After all she had an inkling he was flirting, but that was completely out of the blue.

“I know I probably shouldn’t ask this but … ever since I met you, I thought you were an amazingly strong woman, and doing what you could to ensure your son’s safety. I admire and respect you, and I would be honoured if you joined me for dinner. Doesn’t have to be right now, but … when you feel ready.”

“Oh … um …” she cleared her throat, wishing for their floor to arrive sooner, so the lift doors could open and she could run for her speeder, but there were still 123 floors to go, “thanks, um … I appreciate what you said, but I’m not in a place right now where I can handle something like dating.”

“Of course, and like I said when you feel ready, let me know and I’ll be here.”

She didn’t respond, simply nodded as she almost became mesmerized by his smile, it was warm and comforting, very different from Wolffe’s. His smiles were pleasant, but he had different smiles for different people. He had one smile for those who he thought were absolute idiots, another one for his vode, one for his troopers, one that lit up his face whenever he saw her or Lief. When it was just her, there was also a glint in his eyes that she could never figure out, especially that night he rescued her, he was …

“Mafs?”

“Hmmm” she glanced around her to see the door to the lifts open, Elprit held open the door, as his hand directed her towards the platform, “Sorry” she mumbled as she walked off the lift and towards her speeder, “Thanks for today. I’m sorry I was being difficult.”

He waved his hand, “Don’t stress about it, you’re actually one of my more pleasant clients at the moment. Maybe once we find you a place, we can have that dinner.”

“I’ll think about it” she acknowledged, “Although, I don’t know about being one of your more pleasant clients” she smirked.

“Well, you’re not overly demanding; you’re simply asking for a safe and clean place to live, not a Senator’s style bathroom, or a top level apartment in the highest floor.”

“Okay, those are odd, but not completely outrageous”

“Oh, yeah, how about this, someone wanted to know if the walls were soundproof and asked me if I could step outside, and inform them if I was able to hear them scream?”

“Okay that was … where does this person live?”

“Don’t worry they won’t be anywhere near you.”

“I hope so.”

“I’ll make sure of it.” His earnest appeal made her feel cared for, in a different way from the way Wolffe looked after her and Lief. It was unsettling and comforting at the same time. “Oh, the best one, someone wanted to know if he had to registered how many weapons he had in his place.”

“Okay, I change my mind, keep that person away from me.”

He let out a short laugh, as he nodded along in agreement; his laugh however left Mafs longing for a more familiar one. One that resonated, and made his prosthetic eye shine a little brighter. She pushed the image of him out of her head, promptly saying her goodbye as she got into her speeder, it wasn’t the best one around, but it got her from point A to B, at least for the most part.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Nerium kept her eyes focused on Vi, “Why haven’t you been going in for your checkup, it’s been a month and a half since the whole incident. I told you, you needed to talk to someone about trauma and possible PTSD.”

“Neri, come on, it’s not like I’m going to have another building collapse on me.”

“Maybe not but everyone … everyone, needs to get checked out before going back to the front lines.”

“Yeah… front lines” Vi’s voice shifted as her vision lost focus.

“Vi, what’s wrong?”

She glanced around the room, moving closer to Nerium, “How soundproof is this place? I mean can we have a private conversation.”

Nerium tilted her head as she looked at Vi, her eyebrows furrowing as she took in her friend, “I can make it more secure.”

“Can you?”

She nodded, moving over to the desk, pressing a series of buttons; she had the system installed after they landed on Triple Zero, and she was happy to finally be able to put it to use. There were sounds of vents locking down as the med room they were felt safer for Vi, “Alright, you wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“I think … I think I might be pregnant”

That explained what Nerium was sensing, she had felt a small presence, but she couldn’t determine what or where it was coming from; she grabbed a chair and sat down behind the desk, “How sure are you?”

“Been feel nauseous in the mornings, vomited a couple of times, and just last week I started graving pudding and chips. Not to mention, I’ve been having a lot of cramping.”

“Hmmm… well …” Neri looked around the med room of the 104th, this wasn’t going to do, “We’ll need to go to a civilian med clinic. Come with me.” Vi didn’t object or say anything, she obediently grabbed her bag, and followed Neri out of the room, after she lifted the lockdown.

It wasn’t long before Vi was in a civilian med gown, sitting on a more comfortable med bed than the GAR offered, “How do you know about this place?”

“During the incident, they were short staffed, and asked me to sign on to occasionally help them when I’m on triple zero.”

“Pay good?”

“Not bad, enough to put aside for a rainy day. Now …” Nerium brought over the med droid, “I need you to lie down, take slow deep breaths, close your eyes and allow the med droid to do it’s thing.”

Vi simply nodded as she rested against the bed, she heard whirring, and sensed a light shine on her eyelids as it passed along the length of the med bed. Once the droid was done it sent it’s scans directly towards Neri’s datapad.

Neri sat there looking at Vi’s scan, rereading everything; she couldn’t believe her eyes. There was a fetus, it looked about a month old. She bit her lip knowing the conversation she was about to have was not going to be a pleasant one.

“Vi, you can sit up”

She sat up carefully, watching Neri’s face, “Vi, I need to ask something, and it’s going to be a bit intrusive, when was the last time you had intimate relations with Fives?”

“About three and a half weeks ago give or take, about two weeks after I was discharged from the hospital, since then I just … I didn’t want to be around anyone.”

“That’s called trauma my dear, anxiety, possibly PTSD, which is why I suggested you talk to someone after the incident.”

“I did, Fives.”

“That’s not talking”

“It was a form of talking”

Nerium rubbed her face and carded her hand through her hair, “From what I can tell your baby is healthy. But …”

“But? But what?”

Nerium took in a deep breath, “… the baby is about a month and half, not three weeks.”

“What?”

“When I ran the scan on you at the hospital, you weren’t pregnant at the time, which means …”

“It has the rapid aging gene”

Nerium nodded, slowly as the full weight of the situation before them became clear, “Yes, but it’s not the complete gene.”

Vi had a million thoughts running through her head, but the one that really stuck out, was the same one that played over and over when she was with Fives, “Are you saying I’ll outlive my child?”

“I don’t know. We’ll have to get you set up with an OB/GYN, someone who will understand the uniqueness of your birth, not to mention who is able to keep things quiet and is trustworthy.”

“Do you know someone?”

“I might”

Vi simply nodded, as she wondered how bringing a life into this world ended up being so complicated, “Wait so how long will my pregnancy last?”

“Possibly six months, if I did the math right, it could be shorter or longer. I’m not sure.”

“Once the GAR finds out …”

“No one is going to find out” I reached my hand forward and held hers, “let me talk to someone, and get back to you about what we can do. Okay. I’ll see … what we can come up with”

“Alright”

Despite the tension and worry filling the room, there was still something to be joyful about. Nerium stood throwing her arms around Vi, giving her the best hug she could, passing feelings of warmth and joy on to her, “Congratulations, love. You’re going to be a mom.”

Vi didn’t hesitate as she threw her arms around her as she laughed and cried, both from the joy and worry she felt from the occasion.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Wolffe sat staring at his comm, he wanted to call Mafs back … if he was being honest he wanted her to call. At times he felt he was always instigating the contact between them, especially after the Zillo incident; maybe that was her way of telling him to backoff. Before he even realized his hand was reaching out to his comm he could feel his fingers playing with it. He pulled his hand back reprimanding the offending appendage.

He stood from his seat, grabbing his helmet, when his office door chimed.

“Come in”

The door slid open, he didn’t bother looking at who entered only stopping what he was doing when he heard a familiar voice, “Ad’ika.”

Wolffe focused on Plo’buir as he stepped into the room, the door sliding closed behind him. He watched as his father moved closer to him, he had that look on his face saying they needed to talk, and truthfully, he was grateful for the distraction, he needed to keep his mind focused on the here and now, not on something that would never happen for a man like him.

“Plo’buir, everything okay?”

“I should ask you that question, you seem quite agitated son”

He let out a rather loud humph, before placing his helmet on the desk again. He knew his buir well enough to know he wasn’t going to be leaving any time soon, and no doubt this would be a rather long drawn out conversation which he hated, but ultimately they usually did make him feel better.

“I’m fine”

“Son, you can lie to everyone but me” he took the seat in front of Wolffe’s desk, it had become a habit now.

Plo was tuned in to all his troopers, but those that had survived the Malevolence, he made sure to pay special attention too. He wasn’t saying they were his favourites, for a Jedi never had favourites. At least that’s what he kept telling himself.

Wolffe let out a long sigh, as he threw himself against the back of his chair. His buir always knew when there was something troubling him; he wondered at what point would he learn to just be honest with his father right from the start, rather than continue this charade.

He sat there for a second his eye drifting back to his comm he had left on the table, “If you feel you are friends with someone, but they don’t … or … what if it feels I’m the one who’s … making the effort, is it worth it to stay friends?”

“Nothing is as simple as it seems. I’m assuming we’re talking about your friend that fixed your jetpack, and who you went to rescue, and have been helping whenever you can ever since?”

“Maybe” Wolffe grunted out between his teeth.

“Son, I can’t tell you what’s she thinking or what she’s going through, but needless to say many Coruscant citizens have gone through a lot lately, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Yes”

“Especially those directly affected by the incident?”

“Mmhmm”

“Then give her time. Let her realize what she needs first. If you are always providing an answer before there’s even a question, how is that being supportive.”

“But if I see a problem, shouldn’t I fix it? If I can make it easier for her, isn’t that better?”

“Did she ask you to make it easier for her?”

“No”

“Did she ask you to figure out her problem?”

“No”

“Son, I want you to think about how I treat you and your brothers, do I automatically give you an answer, tell you what you need to do? Or do I simply ask questions, have a chat, and just listen while you come to your own conclusions?”

“Hmph”

“I’m going to take that as a yes. What you need to do is be a supportive pillar, not an overbearing bulldozer. Be the pillar she can lean on when she needs a break. Don’t be a destructive force that plows everything away without providing her a place to rest, or get her so discombobulated she doesn’t know if she’s coming or going.”

He leaned forward bracing his forehead against his hands, as his elbows propped him up on the desk, “I can’t help it. I don’t know why, but her friendship means more to me, than any other friendship I’ve had. I want to be the one to make her smile. I want to be there for her and her son.”

Plo smirked under the breathing mask, chuckling to himself, “You know the reason, Wolffe, you just don’t want to admit the reason.”

“No. I really don’t.”

“You will, in time. Son, in our lives, we only have today, tomorrow is not guaranteed, no matter how hard I may try to fight for all of you. Therefore, don’t let unspoken words or feelings pass you by; take the opportunity, because when that opportunity is gone …” Plo took in a deep breath as his eyes focused on the desk in front of him, “it’s gone forever.” He shifted his focus back on Wolffe, “Remember, son, we only have today.”

Plo stood from his seat hoping the talk they had helped a little, he was about to walk out of the office, but he wanted to give him that extra push to help him realize he needed to be more open about what he was sensing. He was going to wait to tell everyone at the same time, however this was something Wolffe need to hear ahead of time, “Wolffe, I received word today, the information received from Senator Amidala has been verified. The ceasefire has ended. We will be redeploying the fleet to bring down the Geonosis factory, we leave in three days. Three days to prepare and organize ourselves to engage in a fight we may not come back from.”

Wolffe’s eyes focused hard on his buir, as they held a hint of pain and sadness, he heard stories of the first encounter his vode had on Geonosis, the number of lives lost, and he wondered how many of his vode wouldn’t be making it back this time. “If we might not make it back, maybe unspoken words and feelings should remain just that; better for the other person.”

“Or worse” Plo tilted his head a little driving the point home, “What if that’s a question that will go unanswered for them? Don’t you believe everyone deserves to know, even if the outcome is unfavourable? Think about it, son.” He cleared his throat, wishing he could help Wolffe in some way, “We will be holding a mandatory assembly at 1600 hours, make sure everyone knows.” He nodded to his son one more time before he headed out, leaving him to think about what he needed to do.

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 1 year

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Upside Down - Chapter 34

Summary: Iz makes an interesting discovery; Nerium finally starts her training with Quinlan; Pepper begins to question her choices; Anakin let’s an incident with Padme affect his thinking.

(This chapter follows the incident of the Zillo Beast, and runs concurrently with the ‘Senate Spy’ episode of the Clone Wars. Just in case I’m following the chronological version of the Clone Wars, not the aired version.)

A/N: Hello lovelies,

Oh how lovely to be able to write again, to have a routine and a schedule. LOL. I will hopefully be able to upload on a more regular basis, at least once a week in rotation, however, it’s not a hard and fast rule.

I hope everyone is enjoying their 2023 so far, and it’s going the way you hope.

Love oo

Italics - flashback

Bold - Comms

Warnings: mentions of possible treason, corruption, grief, teasing, flirting, kissing, feelings of not good enough, feelings of doubt, force use, dark side of the force, sensation of being choked, sensation of being trapped, disbelief, fainting, mentions of being trapped, mentions of waiting to be rescued, medical staff overwhelmed, mentions of distancing oneself emotionally and physically, mentions of trauma, implied poisoning, questioning of trust, anger, I think that’s it if I miss any please let me know.

AO3 Link | Words: 5,266 | Previous - - - > Next

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SPY

Izani stood before the Jedi Council, this was a first for her. Ever since Api passed away, she was given the promotion of Marshall Commander of the Senate Guard. It threw her at first but the Guard had suffered a great many casualties after the Zillo beast incident, the Senate stressed how much they respected her abilities. What was needed now was stability, and she could provide that; at least she hoped she could provide it.

“Sure, are you about this?” Master Yoda

“It’s the only thing that makes sense. Most of the Senators who have been threatened had some form of connection with the Banking Clan, and yet the only Senator not to receive a threat of any kind has been …”

“The Banking Clan” Master Kenobi offered

Izani simply nodded her head, “The only way we will know for sure is if we send in a spy, someone to work alongside Rush Clovis.”

“Was there someone who had in mind?”

She shifted in her stance as she thought about how she wanted to reveal personal information about a Senator’s life, “There is someone who …” she cleared her throat, “is familiar with Rush Clovis.”

“Someone? Care to be specific?” Master Windu could feel the apprehension coming from the Marshall Commander in front of him.

“Well before I came here, I did reach out to this particular individual” Izani was doing her best to be careful about what she said with regards to Senator Amidala, she had several ties with the Jedi Council, she’d been mentioned in the news numerous times with Anakin Skywalker and Obi-wan Kenobi.

“How did this individual answer?” Master Mundi did his best to be wary of the woman standing before them. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust her, it was that her loyalty wasn’t necessarily to the Republic, rather to the Senate. After all that’s who she reported to, that’s who she protected. Only reason she was before them now, was because they had a common concern.

“They were not inclined to take on the assignment, and pretty much told me to stop asking them. We all know the Banking Clan is in a tenuous position of doing its best not to play favourites between the Separatist and the Republic. Yet, we have Senators and their families being threatened to sway their votes. The only way to know for certain …”

“Have someone work alongside Rush Clovis” Master Kenobi finished her thought, he stroked his chin as he tried to remember all the bills the Banking Clan had put forth lately. “Perhaps, this is not necessarily about a new bill that is to put on the floor.”

“Different idea, you have Master Kenobi?” Yoda focused his attention on his padawan, there were times when his movements were the spitting image of Qui-Gon Jinn.

“What if this is simply not about the Banking Clan, but what if this had to do with Senator Clovis directly conspiring with the Separatist.”

Izani nodded as she followed Master Kenobi’s thinking, “That would actually make sense.”

“More, you have discovered?” Yoda asked the Marshall Commander.

“In a way, there was a security feed I came across of Senator Clovis speaking with an individual, despite our best efforts, the identity of the individual has alluded us. However, as the Jedi Council has more resources, you may be able to identify the individual faster than we can.”

“Do you have this security feed?”

Izani nodded, tapping a few commands on her datapad, the screens on the windows slid closed before a holorecording began to be displayed in the centre of the room. It clearly showed Clovis in deep discussions with an individual, the face was blurry, but the clothes were clearly visible.

“Do you have any possible idea as to who the individual may be?” Master Windu inquired.

“From their clothing, they appear to be from Cato Neimoidia, however that is all we could determine.”

“What is the name of the individual you asked to spy on Senator Clovis?”

“Senator Amidala”

“Leave with us, this concern” Yoda answered

“We will speak with Senator Amidala, and determine if Senator Clovis is in fact conspiring with the Separatists”

Izani bowed before heading out of the Council Chambers.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

It had been several days since she met with the Jedi Council, with no news, not that she expected to hear anything since they now took over the case.

It was weird sitting at her desk, Api’s desk, regardless of how many times she reminded herself Api wasn’t going to come in and tell her in his own subtle way to get out of his chair. She’d never hear another one of his quirky jokes. She rubbed the stress out of her eyes, running her hands through her hair. There were times she could see Api standing there in her office, smirking at seeing her behind the desk, something she had resisted for a really long time.

“You look good behind the desk”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever”

“Don’t you want the desk?”

“What and have the responsibility of all this?” Iz motioned to the mountains of datapads on the desk, “Subbing for you for the week is more than enough.” She stood from the desk stretching out her back and arms, “Alright.” She shook out her arm, “I am officially handing over the keys of the kingdom back to you. This pile here” she pointed to the first one, “completed and signed off case work. This pile” she pointed to the second one, “in transition, read most of them, they just need your sign off. And this final pile here, are ones I haven’t gotten to yet.”

“Busy little bee”

“Yeah, amazing what can happen when someone actually focuses on their work.”

“You saying I don’t focus”

“Hey … those words never came out of my mouth”

“No, you just implied it. Alright” Api motioned for her to move away from the desk, “I guess it’s time for me to ‘focus’ or whatever.”

“Don’t be such a child.”

“I’m not a child, you’re a child” he mumbled under his breath.

Izani chuckled a little to herself, wiping away the tear that had appeared. She let out a sigh of defeat, as she did her best to focus on the report in front of her.

She felt as her anxiety was rising, maybe it was because she was missing Api, didn’t help that she hadn’t been able to see Fox in the past few days, and having zero communication with the Council wasn’t exactly making her feel comfortable with the Jedi per say, especially since she didn’t enjoy the idea of having her case taken from her either.

“How did it go?”

The voice pulled her out of her musings, as her eyes focused on the Red Coruscanti Guard armour, she couldn’t help as a smile spread across her lips at seeing Fox standing there.

“Let’s just say I’m glad it’s done.”

“They didn’t believe you?” He asked as he strode into her office, the door closing behind him.

“Oh they did, so much in fact they took the case from me.”

Fox stopped in his tracks, shock donning his face, “They took the case from you?”

Iz simply shrugged, “What are you going to do?’

“You didn’t fight it?”

“Against the Council of the Jedi? Are you nuts! They probably would have used some Jedi trick just to get me to agree. If they want it, let them take it. I still have something up my sleeve.”

“Meaning?”

“The Senator from Malastare”

“What about them?”

“They said that everything was a lie, and before I could get more information, they were killed on Malastare during the beasts rampage. Yet, somehow I don’t think they were talking about Rush Clovis, corruption is one thing, but they way they spoke, the fear they had, that was something more than corruption. That was outright terror. Something terrified him. Something big.”

“A.K.A. You’re not done” Fox stood beside her, as his hand rested on her shoulder.

She simply nodded, as she looked into his eyes, “Not done.”

He leaned down, pressing his lips against hers, “Good” he mumbled against her lips, as his hand gently held her neck, his thumb stroking the side of her chin. He took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, getting lost in the sensation of her. She shifted without breaking contact till she sat on her desk as Fox stepped in between her feet, taking the opportunity to go a bit further, and would have, had it not been for the beeping from her comm.

She pulled back, letting out a disappointed sigh, as Fox’s forehead rested against hers, they both looked over to the relentless comm. Wishing for it to stop only to hear it beep again.

Izani pushed him back enough to reach for comm, “Marshall Commander Izani, here”

“Commander Izani, Master Kenobi here, could you please make your way down to conference room JT984-Alpha.”

“I’m on my way”

The comm chirped indicating the end of the communication, she let out a sigh, her hand still on Fox’s chest, she focused on his eyes a hint of mischievous there, “Sorry, I gotta go”

“I understand Marshall Commander. Perhaps, we could schedule a meeting later, to go over some interesting developments.”

She smirked as she sat up again, Fox not moving away, instead caging her in with his arms, “Interesting developments?”

“Hmmm” he hummed, “There are a few things that require your … delicate attention.” His finger trailed along the edge of her ear, moving down the side of her neck, and down her arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

“I’m sure to provide all the attention these developments require, unfortunately, I do have a meeting to get to.”

Fox stepped back, a coquettish smile on his lips, nodding in understanding, “Wouldn’t want you to be late for your meeting” he unclipped his helmet from his belt, placing one final kiss on her cheek before putting it on. “Commander” he bowed.

“Commander” she smirked back at him, shaking her head at seeing him sway his hips for her before he exited the room, going back into his normal walk.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Feel the force, Nerium. Let it flow in and around you.”

“If you tell me to feel the force one more time…” This was my first official day training with Quinlan Vos, and all he had to say for the umpteenth time was to let the force flow. “I don’t see how this is going to get me closer to you telling me everything.”

“Give it time, now stop yammering and focus”

I let out a huff of annoyance as I closed my eyes.

My body began to feel weightless as I focused on my breathing like Quinlan taught me. It wasn’t long before I felt my mind calming down and clearing.

Just as my mind was about to shut off, images began to flash in my mind one after another, scenes I hadn’t witnessed before.

Rex stood with his armour, clean and pristine, a few more notches on his helmet, shining in the light of Coruscant commanding a group of men at the barracks of the 501st. Rex image wafted away, only to see Wolffe sitting at his desk was reviewing a datapad, yet there was a smirk on his lips as he glanced at a holopic on his desk, a image that depicted Lief sitting on his shoulders laughing, as Mafs held a box of their possessions on the day they moved in with her sister, now that their apartment was not livable. Wolffe’s smirk was replaced by Plo’buir stroking his tusks as he sat in the Jedi Council room listening to a report. The Jedi Council room disappeared, a refresher came into view, with Vi hovering over the vacc tube vomiting. Her face was flushed as she wiped her mouth, a few seconds later she moved towards the sink, splashing water over her face. She began counting on her fingers, closing her eyes rubbing her forehead. Vi’s image was replaced with Fives laughing and joking with Echo as they walked down the street of Coruscant.

The images disappeared one by one, until darkness began to surround me.

A coldness trailed down my back, seeping into my chest, into my heart; the ice running through my veins paralyzed me instantly. Breathing was becoming difficult, as the ice gripped my lungs, I needed to run as far away as possible from the darkness. From the cold.

My breathing began to quicken, the coldness gripped my heart, squeezing it. I did my best to take in a deep breath, I needed to calm down. As breathing evened out a warmth flooded my body. Regardless, the darkness wasn’t ready to let me go, instead fingers wrapped around me, squeezing me, keeping me there.

Something was telling me not to give up, not to give in, the answers I were seeking, the reason behind everything was just there beyond the darkness, all I had to do was fight harder against the darkness. The bands wrapped around me began to loosen and crack under my defensive actions.

The warmth inside me began to grow, like a balloon being filled, ready to burst. I took in one more sundering breath, and pushed as hard as I could against the grip. The fingers that had wrapped around me so tight preventing me from moving had now fallen away. There amongst the darkness, I could see a glimmer of light. It was warm and inviting, that small glint provided a sense of security I had only felt in Rex’s arms.

With all my might I pushed myself to the light, at the same time doing my place to drag it closer to me, hoping to close the distance. Under the strain the small glint began to crack until it cracked until a bigger streak peaked through. With each push the crack broke more and more, ebbing away the darkness, until it completely disappeared, leaving only a bright light to encapsulate me completely.

Now with the darkness gone, I could finally breathe, the ice running through my veins were gone, the grip on my chest had evaporated. I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath, the air was clean and fresh. Refreshing in every way possible.

As the adrenaline eased off, the sounds of waves filled my ears. As it sloshed around me, warming me up, I opened my eyes slowly, starring down at the pool of water, it shimmered gold all around me as I sat there.

There was a cloud like substance all around me, it felt similar and yet foreign at the same time, almost as if it was a dream I had from long ago.

The clothes I was wearing had changed, it was no longer the comfortable clothes Quinlan had given me, it was now a white dress that flowed in the breeze. I couldn’t help think about how much Rex could do with a place like this; a safe place, somewhere refreshing, somewhere far away from everyone. I couldn’t help let out a laugh, when I felt someone was standing there staring at me. I looked up to see Rex standing there, his armour was different, it seemed like an older model, the kind I saw when I first arrived on Coruscant from Onderon.

Even through the helmet I could tell he was looking into my eyes, and for some reason it made me giggle knowing he was there with me, I wanted to send my love and warmth towards him. I closed my eyes for a second, and just like that he was gone. I looked around, searching for him. Calling out for him, but he was gone.

I stood walking around, hoping for something, some sort of direction or even instructions as to what this place was; when I felt someone behind me. Turning slowly to see a woman I had never seen before.

There was a smile on her face, her hair flowed all around her. She seemed like a pleasant woman, someone I could be friends with, if … if this wasn’t all in my mind. At least as far as I could imagine it was in my mind.

“I didn’t think you’d find me, but you’re here.” her voice was melodious and yet it sounded far away, almost a distant echo.

“I believe you’re mistaken. I don’t know you.”

“You wouldn’t. You were barely a month old when I had to give you away.”

“Excuse me?” I shook my head, “I don’t know who you are, but I was born on Onderon, my father and mother are from Onderon. She’s … well she’s … Who are you?”

“I am your mother.”

I shook my head again, taking a step back, “No. No. That’s … my father wouldn’t have …you’re lying!”

“Nerium. Just breathe.”

“No. You’re lying. It’s a lie.” I started looking for a way out, “I want out! I need out!” I kept pacing back and forth, looking for an exit, running further away from her, she couldn’t be telling the truth. My father said I was his … that I was … no!

“NO!” My eyes opened to see Quinlan sprawled on the other side of the room knocked out, by some force. The table that had been beside us was crumbled, everything was tossed and turned over in the room. My body felt sweaty and drained; I wanted to crawl over to him to check if he was alright, if he was still alive. However, the moment I moved, the room went dark, everything shut down around me, as the room tilted on its side.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kix shifted as he sat at his desk on Coruscant, after the Zillo incident things were in disarray, who survived, who was still missing, who needed medical attention. General Skywalker, had insisted everyone receive a full physical before going back to active duty. As much as everyone hated a full physical, it was a way to make sure everyone was still able to fulfill their duties.

“Pep, has Lt. Violet Lirx, shown up for her physical yet?” Pepper looked back at him a quizzical look on her face, as he chuckled, “Vi”

“Ohhh” she giggled as she moved beside him, her finger playing against his nape, as she stood beside him acting nonchalant, “I didn’t realize who you were talking about for a second. So weird to hear her full title.” She kept trailing her finger over a spot she knew particularly would drive him insane, the reddening of his ears were a clear indication it was affecting him.

He shifted his neck, doing his best to focus on his work, he couldn’t lose focus now, not when they were on Coruscant and everyone was watching them. Well keeping more of an eye on them than on the Triumph.

“You really need to stop” Kix closed his eyes, thinking over the medical texts he studied back on Kamino, however that didn’t work.

“What’s wrong? I’m just looking over your work.”

“If you continue to play this game, you’ll have to deal with the consequences” he glanced up to look in her eyes, “Are you prepared for that?”

Pepper smirked as her finger now trailed over to his ear, caressing it gently, “My dear, I have no idea what you are referring to, I’m simply doing my best to help you, and on that note, no. I do not believe Lt. Violet (a.k.a. VI) Lirx has been in for her physical despite the fact I commed her several times.”

All flirtatious thoughts ran out the window as soon as she said that, “Are we sure she’s alright? Maybe she was more injured than she realized?”

“Fives spoke with her yesterday, but even then it was brief. It seems everyone has tried to reach out to her, but she’s sporadically comming people back. I think the incident really shook her up, emotionally and mentally, after all she was trapped in the debris for a good two days. I think what’s worse is that she hasn’t been able to really deal with what happened.”

Kix let out a long sigh, full of empathy and pain for her, they weren’t exactly close per say, but he had grown to respect her, and appreciated how much she cared for Fives, for all of them, he ran his hand over his face, “All the more reason we need to have her come in, so we can assess her mental well-being as well. I know she was looked after by Neri at the hospital, but that was a quick overview of her physical well-being, and even Neri stated in her assessment, she needs to speak with someone.”

He stood from his seat, moving around the desk, pacing back and forth; with all the chaos going on, he hadn’t been able to follow up with everyone as he wanted. To really sit down and have a one-on-one discussion. “Okay, this is what we’re going to do. We will reach out to her one more time, express the urgency of needing her to come, give her a deadline. If she doesn’t contact us, we will get Fives and Nerium to contact her, and maybe let Neri do the physical.”

“Do you think she’s in danger?”

“I don’t know” Kix moved his neck from side to side hoping to relieve the tension that had been built up there, “And I won’t know unless she communicates with us. Let’s keep this between us for now, just in case.”

Pepper simply nodded, she hadn’t realized how serious the situation could have been and the guilt was beginning to build. Vi had said after the rescue she was fine. In truth she had been so focused on keeping her mind focused on trying to save those who were severely injured and pushing the stress and anxiety from that day out of her mind, she just let Vi slip through the cracks. She was lost in thought, when she felt Kix’s hand on her shoulder, “Hey cyar’ika it’s not your fault” he caressed her cheek hoping to calm her down.

He could see the guilt building up within her, as her breathing quickened, and tears began to well up in her eyes.

“If I had done a better job … if I had just …”

“Hey look at me” he held her face, forcing her to look into his eyes, “We can’t save everyone and we can’t always be there. We need to find out how she’s doing first, before we can jump to conclusions right? For all we know, she’s swamped with her duties. Let’s wait to see if she adheres to the deadline, if she doesn’t we’ll send Fives and Neri. Agreed?”

Pepper simply nodded, as she rested her head on his shoulder. It was bad enough, every day her family sent data streams indicating she should leave the GAR, that she wasn’t able to handle it, she’d never be good enough. Now with this, was she proving them right? Should she leave? Maybe someone else would’ve realized the danger Vi could’ve been in, no doubt Nerium would’ve for sure.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Anakin rushed into the med clinic with Padme in his arms, he made sure they docked on top of the hospital when they came back from Cato Neimoidia. He didn’t want to waste any time in getting the treatment she needed.

Even though she had received the antidote from Senator Dod, there was still a concern regarding side effects from the poison she had received. As soon as he entered the clinic, the staff swarmed them, taking her to a private and secure room. He was forced to wait outside pacing back and forth until he heard news, it was probably one of the longest hours of his life.

“General Skywalker?”

He turned to see Kix, he was thankful and grateful to have his medic there on hand, “Kix, tell me the news”

“Senator Amidala is fine, the poison wasn’t in her system long enough to cause any sort of permanent damage. She’ll suffer from a cold, for the next few days, fever, chills, coughing, but otherwise, the antidote did it’s work and neutralized the threat.”

Anakin let out a huge sigh of relief as he took in the information, his hands resting on his hips, nodding along, “Will she be able to go home?”

“I’ll make sure they keep her here for at least two days to confirm there are no side effects, but if her fever is kept down, and her symptoms don’t worsen, I believe she could go home then.”

“Thank you, Kix” he squeezed his man’s shoulder, appreciating Kix’s quick and honest assessment. Anakin moved towards Padme’s door, when he felt a hesitation coming from Kix.

“Something troubling you, Kix?”

“It’s … the ceasefire. It’s over isn’t it?”

Anakin took in a deep breath, “I can’t say one way or another, Kix. What I can tell you, is that there will probably be an announcement regarding that topic in a few days, maybe sooner.”

“Understood, sir.”

He simply nodded before heading into Padme’s room, “How are you feeling?” She smirked, covering a cough that came on suddenly, Anakin rushed to her side, grabbing the cup of water on the table beside her, “Here, sip it slowly.” He held her up as he passed the cup, watching her like a mother nuna.

“If you keep staring like that, people are going to talk”

“About your beauty?”

She couldn’t help smiling, shaking her head at his antics, “Really, I’m fine” she held on to his hand, giving it a squeeze before she rested back against the pillows, “You need to go and report to the Council.”

“Are you sure you’ll be alright alone?” Before Padme had a chance to answer Anakin’s comm beeped, he let out an annoyed sigh, without having to look he already knew who it was.

“They’re looking for you” she gave him a soft and sleepy smile, “I’ll be alright. Promise.” She squeezed his hand one more time, he nodded placing a kiss on the back of her hand.

“Let me know if you need anything”

Padme simply nodded, as she adjusted herself one more time, before falling asleep to the sounds of Anakin’s feet exiting the room. Sergeant Gregar Typho stood outside the door guarding the sleeping Senator, “You will stand here by yourself?” Anakin eyed the Sergeant carefully, he seemed like a respectable and trustworthy man; he was quite useful on Cato Neimoidia.

“Senator Amidala’s personal bodyguard will be arriving in the next two minutes, as well the Senators’ Guards will be coming shortly, I believe the Marshall Commander herself will be arriving shortly.”

“Alright, keep your wits about you. Please make sure to contact me if anything, and I mean anything seems amiss.”

“Will do, General Skywalker.”

Anakin took one more look at the closed door, before he headed towards the Council chambers with the holodisc, ready to lay out Senator Clovis’ misdeeds. As he walked towards the chambers he couldn’t help but rejoice at the idea of making the Senator pay, was it wrong that he wanted to see the man squirm? Was it because he wanted justice for the Republic or was it because he hated the fact Padme had to be friendly with Rush? Either way, he wanted to see him suffer; he knew he shouldn’t feel that way, he shouldn’t be looking forward to such animosity, but he couldn’t help it.

Before he even realized it he was standing in the middle of the Council chambers, going over everything he discovered regarding Rush Clovis, he must have been more distracted than he realized. He was brought back to the present as Obi-wan shifted in his seat.

“Confirmed, you have, Senator Clovis’ association?” Master Yoda kept his eyes on the young Jedi Knight standing before him. He was a passionate and caring Jedi, although his attention towards Senator Amidala had always been one that caused him concern.

“It is clear the Senator is working with the Separatists, otherwise why would he have access to their factory?”

“Hmmm” Master Windu cupped his chin as he analyzed the information Skywalker had brought before them, “I believe it would be best to leave Senator Clovis alone for now”

“Excuse me!” Anakin’s voice raised higher than he had expected, however he couldn’t believe what he was hearing, “Are we really letting this man … this Senator who we know is working with the Separatists go free?”

“It’s not as simple as you think, Anakin” Obi-wan spoke up, hoping to calm his padawan’s frustration.

“Not as simple?”

“The mere fact the Senator in question is from the Banking clan, proves it is not as simple as we think” Master Mundi stated.

“He could use his connections as a member of the Banking clan to justify the reason he was there on Cato Neimoidia” Master Billaba clarified, “We weren’t privy to their conversations, nor did we have anyone record their conversation.”

“What about the attempt on Senator Amidala’s life?”

“Unfortunate as it was” Master Iluminara answered, “The animosity between the Trade Federation and the Senator from Naboo is a long entrenched one, he could easily claim it was a separate incident and nothing to do with the reason he was on Cato Neimoidia.”

“Not to mention he was able to administer the antidote, in fact saving Senator Amidala’s life” Master Windu finished.

“Yet, we know he was conspiring!” Anakin reaffirmed

Yoda nodded in understanding, “Act against Senator Clovis we cannot, of what we discovered regardless.”

“Be mindful of your emotions, young Skywalker” Master Mundi chastised, “We must act in a way beneficial to the Republic. Though unpleasant the situation, we must view it from all sides. We are keepers of the peace, not vengeful warriors seeking to punish those we think have wronged us.”

Anakin bowed before the Jedi Council, “Of course, Master. Forgive my outburst.” He stood, facing the Council once again, the turmoil within him calmed down, “I will follow the Council’s decision.”

“I fear this information confirms what we have felt in the force” Master Plo stated with a heavy heart, “The ceasefire is nothing more than a charade, a way to keep us distracted, allowing the droid factories on Geonosis to start up again.”

“The ceasefire is over” Master Windu’s voice rang throughout the chamber, everyone’s disappointment was felt through the force, “Prepare your troops, young Skywalker, we will be advising troop movements within the following few days.”

“As you command, Master Windu” Anakin bowed one more time, exiting as quickly as his legs could carry him, he was doing his best to remain calm while in their presence.

He understood why they couldn’t act against Senator Clovis, but the fact Padme had to suffer, had to be near such an odious man, and there was nothing he could do, angered him. Made him feel weak, powerless, a waste of an existence. He needed more power, he didn’t want to feel weak like he had when he was slave, unable to stand up to the corruption or evil deeds he saw. He knew it was wrong of him to feel the want for more, it was wrong to think Clovis deserved to die, but he couldn’t help it. Just like before, his feet were moving him before he even realized where he needed to go.

As he walked along the corridors, it registered in his mind where he was heading, to one of the abandoned training rooms. He definitely needed to vent his feelings and the best place to do it was far away from everyone.

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 2 years

Text

Upside Down - Ch. 28

Summary: Follows Season 2 - episode 2 & 3 of the TCW; Nerex deal with the loss of Denal, Kix and Pepper share a moment, Rex receives some advice, Wolffe looks for a mechanic.

A/N: Hello Lovelies,

Well things are getting more intense, especially for the second season of TCW, I’m really enjoying writing for Kix and Pepper and for Wolffe, but there’s another clone that will be getting some more appearance in the chapters to follow. just not sure when he’ll be making his full debut, can you take a guess who I’m talking about?

Love oo

Bold - Comm

Italics - flashback

Warnings: Clone deaths, feelings of guilt, fluff, angst, unwanted contact, harassment, anger, misdirected aggression, arrest, threats, mentions of being widow, mentions of being single parent, I think that’s it, if I miss any warnings, please let me know.

AO3 Link | Words: 5,688 | Previous - - - > Next

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DECEPTION

I walked beside Denal as we continued down the corridor, looking for Cad Bane, when I saw a picture of the man, I couldn’t believe he had been the one in my dream; the tension was high amongst us, I wanted to help him relax, smirking as I thought back to walking with Rex in the tunnels “… if only you were there Denal,” I chuckled “you should have seen him, he walked straight into a bar, it was such a loud thunk. I pretty sure there’s going to be bruise, at first I thought for sure he had suffered a concussion.”

“What happened?” He chuckled, keeping his voice low.

“Turned around all innocent, acting like nothing happened telling us to turn on our night vision. Jokes on him, mine was already on.”

Denal couldn’t help himself he let out a laugh, a lot louder then he intended; but he could simply see his vod trying to remain cool and collected in front of his girl. His hud flashed, indicating a comm coming in, “Denal”

“Denal, I need you to send Nerium to meet the General” Rex’s voiced came through clear.

“What happened?”

“The no good bounty hunter electrocuted the Commander, ships breaking up, so we need to move fast. Have her meet them one floor below you, at the entrance of the hangar, we’ve cleared the way to the hangar. Minimal danger here.”

“Sending her now”

“Copy that”

“Rex needs you to meet the Commander and the General at the hangar entrance. She’s been electrocuted by that creep.”

“Do you know if she’s lost consciousness?”

“Rex didn’t say anything”

“Copy that, I’ll head there right now”

“Watch your six”

“You too, Denal. You guys stay safe. Don’t forget to turn on your night vision” Denal’s shoulders shook up and down, as he tried to suppress the laughter, I looked at the rest of our group, they all nodded to me, I pulled out both of my blasters and headed towards Anakin and Ahsoka.

- - - - - - - - - -

“Denal, let me look at your injury, I don’t want it to get infected.”

“It’s fine” he mumbled out, barely glancing up to look at me, clutching on to his arm tighter.

“Denal…” my voice was quieter.

Rex placed his hand on my shoulder pulling me back, and walking me to a corner of the shuttle “Give him some time.” Rex’s voice cut into my helmet, he’d opened up the private comm channel between us, “He lost his men, he just needs some time to make peace with it.”

“I know, I just want to help him, babe”

“I know cyar’ika, just wait till we get back onboard the Resolute to ask him to look at his wound, it’s not a serious injury. Once he’s in his proper headspace, you can dote on him all you want.” Although his words were comforting, there was still a hint of jealousy ringing through.

“Aww, are you jealous?”

“Pfft, please”

“Want me to dote on you when we get back?”

“Maybe … however, I’m not injured.”

“Well then, I’ll make sure to give him all my attention.”

Rex stepped closer to Nerium, his hand holding her wrist gently, “All your attention?”

“Thought you weren’t jealous”

“You didn’t answer my question”

I shrugged my shoulders, “Rex, after all we’ve been through, are you really jealous?”

“No. Yet, I barely see you as it is.”

“Well when we’re back on triple zero, we should fix that. Shouldn’t we?”

“Meaning?”

I took in a deep breath, after Denal lost his men, losing some of our men trying to get to Cad Bane and the holocron, losing Master Ropal, I knew what I wanted, “Maybe we can spend time together outside of the barracks”

“Really? Where exactly?” Rex knew what she was referring to but he needed to hear it from her, plus it was fun to tease her like this.

“At my apartment”

“You have an apartment?”

“Did you think you knew all my secrets?” I chuckled as I took in his head tilt.

“I’m looking forward to knowing all of your secrets, but only when you’re ready to show them to me”

“I’m ready”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely, and if we weren’t surrounded by Anakin and everyone else, I would take off my helmet and show you, how sure I am.”

“Then we should make it back to triple zero as soon as possible”

“I agree”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“How’s Nerium?” Pepper asked as she glanced over to Kix, they were on their way back to triple zero after losing not only the holocron but Cad Bane.

He let out a sigh filled with deep sadness, another brother gone, another life snubbed out because of war, “She’s pretty upset. Both her and Rex are having a hard time, she blames herself for leaving their side; and for not noticing that something was off about Denal.”

“Didn’t General Skywalker even say he didn’t notice, how could she …”

He held up his hand as she was talking, his way of telling her to stop before she went too far, “You don’t understand Neri, it’s not that …” he ran his hand over his scalp, there really wasn’t anyway for Pep to know her, they spent barely any time together before she was shifted to the 104th, “she spent a lot of time with Denal, he was having a hard dealing with some of his regrets. She was doing her best to help him deal with what happened on Mimban. It took a long time before he actually opened up to her, but when he finally did, they became really good friends. Especially, since he was close to Rex.” Pepper retook her seat on the bunk Kix was currently lying in, his head propped on the pillow against the durasteel wall, one of his arms adding extra support to his neck, “She blames herself for not noticing Denal had been replaced by Cad Bane; well both her and Rex blame themselves for not noticing.”

“Because they both noticed something was off with him but neither one pushed it, chalking it up to the grief of losing his men.”

“Exactly. I think it also made her realize how easily she could have lost Rex; or worse how easily she could’ve lost him and no one noticing.”

She nodded at his statement, it was one thing she was grateful for, Kix hadn’t had to go with them on this mission, but that didn’t mean there wouldn’t be future missions he would have to go with them. Since she wasn’t a combat medic, she wouldn’t be able to join him in the field like Neri would’ve been able to, that alone made her apprehensive of when he would finally head off.

She shifted back on the bunk curling up beside him, resting her hand on his bare chest, as her head found his shoulder, his arms wrapped around her, pulling her in closer to him, he placed a kiss on her head.

“You know, I can’t lose you. Especially, since I just found you, Kix.”

“I know, cyar’ika. Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere” he pressed a long kiss on the crown of her head, “I promise. I can’t lose you too, Pep.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Plo stood beside Rex as they waited for Nerium to be done with the tests she was currently undergoing with the Jedi healers, “Would you allow this old man to give you some advice, Captain?”

Rex glanced over to the General, who surprisingly and shockingly took Neri under his wing as quickly as he had with his own men, “Of course, General”

“Please call me Plo or Plo’buir as my battalion has loving adopted.”

“Of course, General Plo”

The Captain’s reaction made him chuckle a little, “There are those who do not view clones with the respect they deserve or value them as they should be”

“With all due respect General, that’s nothing new. It is something all of us clones have had to learn to deal with since coming into this universe, especially here on triple zero.”

“I understand, unfortunately and ashamedly some Jedis have adopted this view. We’ve tried our best to steer them in correcting their opinion, some have seen their error and how quickly it is to be affected by the dark side, others less so. A darkness is brewing all around us. Things will become … more difficult I fear.”

“I don’t understand what you are getting at General Plo”

Plo let out a deep sigh, “What Nerium saw was a fore gleam of the future, what transpired with the holocron, with Cad Bane, only reinforces what she saw; and the mere fact it is only a stepping stone of the Sith Lord’s reach. In some way, shape or form she is connected with the Sith Lord. He will be trying again to get a hold of her, my fear is he will make another attempt soon, and when that happens …”

“… we might not be able to save her”

“Exactly, and I do not mean simply from him. The dark side is a powerful enemy, but the light side is an ever more powerful ally. There will be more difficult days ahead, not just for her, but for you as her … friend, Captain.”

“Sir, if this is about …”

“I am simply making you aware of the possibility of what could happen, Captain Rex. I will do my best to help her overcome whatever may be present before her, I hope you will help her do the same. I only ask you heed my counsel Rex, remain wary and vigilant, our enemies are growing, and several will not take kindly to those who support clones not to mention, to those who have formed close bonds with them.”

“What are you trying to say, General?”

“Nerium may be in greater danger than either of us realize” Plo turned from watching the current test she was undergoing to focus on Rex, “I believe when she was injured originally on Onderon, something happened that allowed her to see part of the Sith Lord’s plans; or a more likely scenario her connection with the force awakened at that moment”

“You believe she saw the future during that moment?”

“Possibly, maybe she has been unaware of it’s impact on her, as it has slowly been manifesting its way to the surface of her conscience mind to understand.”

“Her inexplicable desire to serve with the 501st?”

“Precisely, her actions up to this moment, could be from her subconscious mind directing her to help us in someway”

“Are you saying …” Rex didn’t know quite how to put this, “are you saying sir, that everything she has experienced until now has not been what she wanted, but rather what the Sith Lord wants her to do?”

“I cannot answer that Rex, you probably know her best out of everyone. You and Kix. However, it is something to consider, and if even in her subconscious she is working with us, that gives me hope.”

Rex had never felt so speechless before, was he saying that everything he and Nerium had experienced, all the moments of confessions of love, their kisses, their moments of tenderness, everything had been because something was directing her to do it, not because she wanted to be with him? No. No that couldn’t be true, the way she looked at him, held his hand, the way she wanted to live her life with him, it couldn’t be a facade. It was real. It had to be. Maybe the General was right and she did see something during her time in the tank, or maybe it was her that appeared to him when he faced Ventress, however that doesn’t mean that she would have just been with because her subconscious directed her to him and even if it did - did that negate their relationship?

“Of course, this is pure speculation on my part Rex, however it would make the most sense. At least until we learn the results of her tests.”

“I’ll be vigilant, General Plo”

“I know you will, Captain” Plo placed his hand on Rex’s shoulder, “Your … attachment and affection for her is clearly evident, Captain. Her attachment and affection for you is as bright as any star. I do not believe her attachment to you would change, nor do I believe it is a facade.”

Rex turned to look at the General beside him, “I didn’t …”

“It would have been a logical assumption, given what I just stated. Her feelings for you are quite real Captain. Have no fear with regards to how she views you. Bare in mind, Skywalker, Kenobi and myself may have turned a blind eye to the situation growing between the two of you, but that does not mean others will. It is clear the Sith Lord does not want you two together, which is an advantage we must consider. I simply will state, you both will need to be wary of your feelings when around others.”

Rex didn’t know why but the General’s statement felt like a vibroblade piercing his heart, “Are you telling me I have to let her go? Or to use her as a tool to fight this war?”

“On the contrary,” Plo smiled underneath his breathing mask, as he gave his blessing to the one who captured his adoptive daughter’s heart, “I’m telling you to cherish her and protect her with everything you have; I believe our solution and the end of the war lies with the two of you. In short son, I’m saying do not let her go for anything.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Let me get this straight, you want me to increase guard presence in the mechanic’s wing of GAR Headquarters because you have a crush on someone.”

“I do not have a crush” Wolffe’s growled at his vod.

“Right?” Fox’s tired eyes narrowed on his vod, “Yet, you want my already stretched thin and tired men to put in even more hours to look after one civilian?”

“I want you to help a citizen of the Republic, who seems to have to be on alert at all times due to her supervisor. After all they do for us …”

“Wolffe, come on” Fox leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms, “who are you fooling - you can’t stand civvies any more than I can stand the Chancellor - what’s really going on?”

Wolffe let out a low growl as his eyes narrowed on his brother, “Nothing is going on. I’ve only met this person once. However, they helped out Medic Nerium when she first arrived …”

“Nerium? As in the one who defected from the Confederacy, Nerium?”

“You know her?”

Fox simply nodded, he had been impressed with her fortitude when he met her, “I met her a while ago when they wanted her to work as the Chancellor’s aide, she turned it down not caring how it may have looked. Told them, she couldn’t be working in safety and comfort knowing our brothers were sacrificing their lives for the Republic. She was adamant about it, telling them flat out she felt she could do the most good working on the front lines.” Fox simply smirked “She became a medic? Huh. Good for her.”

“Seems like you’re the one with the crush, vod”

He let out a chuckle, “Hardly. Simple admiration and respect ner vod. Who’s this person you wanted to have extra security?”

“Her name is Mafs, designation JASP93, Mechanic and Tech Engineer.”

Fox grabbed his datapad making notes, “You said she’s having trouble with her supervisor?”

“According to Nerium, yes.”

“Anything else, I should be aware of?”

“She’s a single mom, looked after her kid when her husband passed away two years ago. He died defending the previous Chancellor.”

“I meant with regards to the reason she needs the extra security” Fox raised his eyebrow, doing his best to quell the smirk that was wanting to appear on his lips.

“No, nothing else that I can think of”

“All right, I’m not going to guarantee anything, but I’ll see what I can do”

“That’s all I ask, ner vod”

True to Fox’s word there had been an increase of security present in the mechanic’s wing. Some of the guards however, looked like a bunch of shinies but at least there was some form of protection, not just for Mafs but for others that were there.

Wolffe walked around the mechanic’s area, heading to a very distinct section, looking for a specific table. Every so often he stopped to ask one of the workers for directions, eventually finding the person he was looking for; he was grateful he had his helmet on - preventing for a quick identification as to who he was, although who knew if they would’ve been able to remember who he was. After all, they only met once, briefly.

Yet, he didn’t hold back, dropping the damaged jet pack on the mechanic’s table with a loud clang, smirking as her shoulders jumped from the impact. The magnifiers she was wearing jolting on her head, her hand gripping the soldering iron in her hand, as her eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.

Mafs stopped her soldering, pushing back the magnifiers with her wrists, looking up from her work at the jetpack in front of her. The dark gray and white striped jet pack was unique and oddly pleasing to the eyes; yet, she wasn’t about to give in to whoever this idiot was who thought he could just skip the line. She looked at the hand still resting on the pack, the black gloves clenching on the top, she followed the arm noticing the similar dark grey accent against the white armour, her eyes trialing all the way to the wolf accented helmet staring down at her.

“Listen, I don’t know who you are, who you think you are, who you perceive yourself to be in your own little world, but there is a system in place to getting repairs done. You dropping your equipment on my desk is not going to make me want to help you either” she motioned with her hand for him to leave, “so take your stuff off my desk and go see the Assignment Officer.”

Wolffe watched as she focused back on her task pushing the magnifiers back down, “I don’t want someone else to touch my equipment” he growled.

“Well that’s not my problem” she finished soldering the wires in front of her, wiping off the soldering iron on a damp cloth beside her, before placing it back in it’s holder, “I have about seventy-five orders ahead of you, and frankly I don’t see why I should help you to jump the line. Especially, since I don’t know who you are or why you felt I should be the one to help you” talking while her focus remained on the datapad in front of her.

He thought about it, why should she bump him? Well simple, he helped her out, though she didn’t know it. Not to mention, he couldn’t tell her, otherwise she’d have known Nerium told him about the situation she was currently dealing with at work, possibly causing a rift between the two of them, and that’s not something he would do to his vod’ika. Yet, what could be a valid reason? Okay, if he was honest, he was highly impressed with the comms she gave Rex and Nerium, and if she could do something as spectacular as that, she definitely could handle his pack.

There was nothing but silence coming from the Commander in front of her, she may not know who he was, but the way he carried himself was evident of his authority, “You’ve got about two minutes to make your case, if I’m not convinced, you’ll have to go to the Assignment Officer” she mumbled as she closed the datapad, testing out the current, before turning it on.

“I’ll owe you one”

She looked up again at the wolf helmet, “Yeah … so you’ll what? Look after my kid for an evening?” She shook her head, as she turned on the datapad. She tested a few functions, before turning it off, grabbing a packaging slip from the drawer beside her. “Listen I’m sure you think you owing me one is going to make all the difference in the world to me, but that’s not a good enough reason.”

“Why are you always this difficult?”

Her hands froze as her eyes found the visor once again, “Always? I’m sorry have we met before?”

“You really don’t know who I am?”

“Listen here, grey fangs, I’m sure there are plenty of women, who know who you are, and would probably trip over themselves just to help you. However, I do my work fairly, without prejudice and without expecting favours; it’s the only way everyone gets what they need. Don’t feel bad everyone gets treated the same regardless of rank whenever they come to me. Please also remember, everyone is in the same boat, everyone needs their equipment ASAP and you ‘owing me one’ is not …”

“Commander Wolffe!” A voice rang out behind them, he turned to see two of the 501st saunter over to him.

Mafs eyed the grey armour in front of her before looking over to the two men who were irritating but fun to have around at times. How did she not recognize the man who Nerium had mentioned was her new Commander? She met him only once but his grating and grumpy personality should have made it very clear to her who he was.

“Jesse, Hardcase, what are you doing here?” Wolffe answered through clenched teeth.

“Hey Mafs” Hardcase waved at her, “we were told our stuff was ready?”

“Yeah, give me a second” she was grateful for the excuse to get away from him, the Commander in front of her was driving her nuts. The same way he did that night at 79’s. Who did he think he was, just demanding she work on his jet pack as though she didn’t have other work to contend with. Ugh! Was he always use to getting his way? So because he was Nerium’s Commander she should what roll out the red carpet for him?

Her steps were filled with annoyance as she walked closer to the F.R.R (Finished Repair Room), “Mafs” oh maker, no. It was that man. She took in a deep breath as her hand hovered by the door to the storage unit. She willed her nerves to calm down, not because she was nervous, but rather she didn’t want to commit murder especially with the increased Corrie Guard presence. She turned cautiously to look at her supervisor.

“Sir?”

“What are you doing over here?” His eyes slowly took her in, as his tongue licked his lips. It sent a chill down her spine and made her feel sick to her stomach. He was always careful to push the line but never quite go over the line, knowing it would give her the excuse needed to react back.

“Retrieving a finished repair” she almost wanted to add a rather explicative curse word at the end, why else would she go to the F.R.R, what a dumbass.

“Need help?” He stepped closer, crowding her against the door, “Sometimes it difficult to handle such a large equipment on your own, you need the assistance of others.”

She stepped further away from him, “Thank you, but that’s not necessary. I’m fine on my own” her hand clenching by her side, if this man didn’t step back she was going to throttle him.

“Why won’t you let me ease your tension?” His thick dirty finger, reached up and inched closer to her face, maker even his hand smelled disgusting, she thought it was just his breath.

“I’m fine, sir. Please step back, I do not appreciate you being this close to me.”

“Why are you so difficult JASP93? I could make your work here easier, if you just allowed me to help you out. Don’t you want that? Give yourself more energy for more enjoyable things”

His innuendos were not lost on her, and he was really pushing the line this time, all he had to do was lay a hand on her and she should react, claiming self-defence. She watched as his hand was inching closer, closing the distance as he was about to touch her face. His head inched closer too, he licked his lips, his last meal still clinging to the tip of his tongue and teeth, it made her want to gag.

Just as she was about to react, a black glove held on to his wrist causing the man’s face to contort as though he was suffering an unimaginable pain, Mafs followed the glove to the vambrace, seeing the same dark grey accent.

“I believe the lady asked that you step back”

Wolffe pushed her supervisor further away, stepping in front of her, blocking her from his view. She felt relief for the first time, in a long time. Many of the other workers were afraid to step in, afraid to lose their only source of income for their families. Yet despite the relief, she also felt annoyed at his term of ‘lady,’ she wasn’t some helpless damsel in distress, she was just bidding her time, till she could make a proper claim of self-defence, so she wouldn’t lose her job.

“Listen you …” the man began as he clutched his wrist against his chest, only for two Coruscanti Guards to rest their hands on his shoulders, squeezing a little tighter then necessary to keep him still.

“Sir you’re coming with us. Ma’am?” they directed towards Mafs, she leaned out from behind her protector.

“Yes?”

“Would you like to press charges?”

“Um … I …”

“You do JASP93, and you can find yourself …” Wolffe didn’t let him finish, as his hand wrapped around the man’s throat.

“Do. Not. Talk. To. Her.” He growled out, his two Coruscanti vode ignored his actions, keeping their visors trained on her.

“Ma’am?”

“Yes. I would like to press charges.”

At her statement, Wolffe released his hold stepping back in front of her, Jesse and Hardcase stood off to the side, blocking everyone else’s view of what seemed to be transpiring.

“Very well, as per section 15.76.1 subsection B of the Coruscanti Penal Code, you are hereby charged with harassment in the workplace, uttering threats, and attempted assault. You have the right to an attorney, if you cannot afford an attorney one will be provided for you. You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used in the court of law. Do you understand these rights as I have directed stated towards you?” Thire’s eyes narrowed on the man currently being put in binders.

“Yes”

“Good” he lowered his head and voice till it was beside the odious man’s ear, “Please, feel free to resist arrest so we can have an excuse to beat your ass all the way to the prison cell.”

The man looked from one trooper to the next, narrowing his eyes when he found Mafs again, vowing to seek revenge on her in some way or fashion.

Wolffe watched as they carded the man away, he turned to look at the woman he had met only a few days before, she looked shaken and pale, “Are you okay?”

Mafs clenched her hands by her side, she narrowed her eyes, clenching her jaw as she locked eyes with the Commander’s visor, “How dare you!”

Her eyes darted from the Commander in front of her to Jesse and Hardcase, she felt tears begin to prick her eyes, she turned her back on him entering the storage, slamming the door closed behind her. She didn’t even know why she reacted the way she did, or why she was angry with him. She wasn’t. She was grateful he stepped in; but somehow he made her feel … weak and pathetic. She felt embarrassed in front of him.

Wolffe was taken aback by her reaction, did he do something wrong?

He just wanted to help. He saw the way her eyes widened with a hint of fear. The way the man crowded her. The way none of her colleagues reacted. The fact they were in a blind spot to the Guards, worried him, he couldn’t just stand there and do nothing.

Could he? What did he do wrong?

He pushed all thoughts away, resigning within himself that all civvies were the same, they only looked at clones as nuisances and waste of Republic funds. He turned to look at Jesse and Hardcase shrugging his shoulders, pushing the pain he felt away.

“Don’t take it personally, she’s probably just working through her emotions right now. You gotta admit that was intense, and you did choke a guy” Jesse offered

“Maybe we should give her some space, let’s wait over by her desk” Hardcase suggested, directing the other two towards their previous position.

Wolffe simply nodded heading over to her desk. His eyes took in the damaged jet pack, what exactly was he hoping for? Wouldn’t it be simpler and easier to just get a new one? Plo’buir already told to just requisition a new one.

Maybe it was a bad idea to try to fix it. It was just a momentary weakness of nostalgia wanting to repair the jet pack that had been his life line on more than one occasion. Maybe he should just scrap it rather than try to convince her to fix it for him, along with his pathetic attempt to apologize for his behaviour the first time he met her. Just like she said, who was he to her? His hand clenched by his side, his annoyance growing, why did he care about some stupid civvie who clearly didn’t want his help. Screw it.

“Tell her not to worry about the jet pack, tell her to chuck it” He turned to walk away, offering no further explanation or statement.

“You’re going?” Hardcase asked

Wolffe paused for a mere second, answering over his shoulder “I have a meeting to get to.”

Neither Hardcase nor Jesse said anything further, they looked from one another to the jet pack on her desk, to the retreating form of the Commander who they respected and admired. “What do you think that was all about?” Jesse motioned towards Wolffe.

“Who knows, but I’ve learned sometimes it’s best not to ask when it comes to him”

“True”

It was another few minutes before Mafs came out from the storage room with two boxes, her eyes swollen from tears, her face flushed from embarrassment about what happened. She wanted to yell at the Commander again, wanted to tell him how dare he think of interfering she wasn’t some helpless girl who needed a rescue. But most of all she wanted to say thank you, for protecting her without a second thought and for not allowing that man to intimidate her. She wanted to apologize for her outburst. She looked around the space only seeing Jesse and Hardcase by her desk, the jet pack still in the same spot, but the Commander no where to be found, and for some inexplicable reason there was a weird sensation in her chest, it felt like a dense pit forming.

“Where did …”

“Oh, uh…” Jesse rubbed the back of his head, looking over to his batch mate hoping he would answer.

“He had a meeting to get to” Hardcase took over.

“Right,” Jesse added finally finding his courage to speak, “he also said to just chuck the jet pack, there was no need to fix it.”

Mafs looked at the jet pack, she didn’t know why but she just couldn’t shake the feeling in her chest, she felt … guilty, angry, embarrassed at her reaction. If her son had acted that way to someone who helped him, she would have grounded him and forced him to apologize.

“Mafs, you okay?” Jesse tilted his head as he looked at her, she hadn’t stopped looking at the jet pack the entire time she came back to her desk.

She shook her head out of her thoughts, looking at the two most chaotic clones of the 501st, “Yeah, sorry. Um … anyway, here” she gave each of them a box, “Fixed your helmets, good as new, and tweaked a few of the features. Now do your best not to smash these.”

“Awww, you take all the fun out of being a clone trooper” Hardcase whined as he donned his helmet.

“Yes. Yes, I do.” She chuckled, “I still don’t understand how you cracked these to begin with”

“Oh well see, there’s this game among bounty hunters, where two hunters wear helmets, and the run towards each other seeing who can knock the other one out by ramming themselves against the other.”

“I’m sorry?” She looked between the two, they simply nodded in agreement to Jesse’s explanation, “You trying to give each other brain or neck injuries? What kind of dumb, idiotic …”

Hardcase held up his hand, “Okay, okay, we get it. We got yelled at for two days by Kix and by Nerium when she found out, we don’t need to hear it again”

Mafs rubbed her eyes, hoping to erase the irritation that lay there, “Fine. Whatever. Anyway, boys I got work to get back to, take the boxes and make sure to sign out in the Retrieval Log.”

“Will do. Thanks Mafs” they both shouted in unison.

“Hey, before you go, what battalion is that Commander from?”

“Commander Wolffe is part of the 104th Battalion, Mafs.”

“Same one, Nerium is now a part of” Jesse stated, he missed Nerium. He got to see her and spend some time with her for a bit when they went after Cad Bane, but she was pretty shaken with Denal’s death. In fairness, she always was shaken a little by any troopers death.

“Thanks” Mafs focused back on the jet pack on her desk, well if there was any way to bump the line, making her feel guilty and stepping in to protect her was a good way to do it.

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 3 years

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Upside Down - Master List

SEASON ONE - AO3 LINK

Chapter 1 - Deployment | Chapter 2 - Introductions

Chapter 3 - Treatment | Chapter 4 - Rescue

Chapter 5 - Patient | Chapter 6 - News

Chapter 7 - Crash | Chapter 8 - Encounter

Chapter 9 - Defenders | Chapter 10 - Interference

Chapter 11 - Clarification | Chapter 12 - Night Shift

Chapter 13 - Pantora | Chapter 14 - Triple Zero

Chapter 15 - 79′s | Chapter 16 - Naboo - SEASON ONE FINALE

SEASON TWO

Chapter 17 - Ryloth | Chapter 18 - Nightmare

Chapter 19 - Reality | Chapter 20 - Goodbye

Chapter 21 - Organization | Chapter 22 - Surgery

Chapter 23 - Injury | Chapter 24 - Tribulation

Chapter 25 - Voyage | Chapter 26 - Felucia

Chapter 27 - Sight | Chapter 28 - Deception

Chapter 29 - Truth | Chapter 30 - Senator

Chapter 31 - Dinner | Chapter 32 - Announcement

Chapter 33 - Aftermath | Chapter 34 - Spy

Chapter 35 - Awakening - SEASON TWO FINALE

SEASON THREE

MAIN MASTER LIST

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 2 years

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Upside Down - Ch. 18

Summary: Rex attempts to make things right with Nerium, while the 501st deal with the aftermath of Ryloth.

A/N: Hello Lovelies,

Okay, I know some of you were upset about what happened with Rex and Nerium, don’t worry he’s going to make it right. After all, how would you handle a Sith attack? What would you do to protect the person you love? Don’t worry his brother will have a word with him too.

REMINDER: NEXT WEEK WILL BE THE FIRST POSTING FOR THE GYM MEMBERSHIP - ALTERNATING WEEKS FOR UPSIDE DOWN AND THE GYM MEMBERSHIP.

Italics - Flashback

Warnings: Kissing, betrayal, mentions of drinking and drugs, angst, feelings of disgust, nausea, slap, vomiting, grief, injuries, mentions of medical procedures, mental trauma from previous Sith attack, anger, flirting, mentions of dead troopers, putting troopers in harms way (accidentally), disobeying orders, feelings of guilt for lives lost, recounting of Sith attack, I think that’s it, if I miss any warning, please let me know.

Feel free to comment, leave some love, do a reblog, or all three. I love to hear from you guys, tell me what you think. Love oo. If you want to be tagged for upcoming chapters, let me know.

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NIGHTMARE

“Let me get this straight, you want me to kiss you, so your girl will break up with you?”

“Yes”

“Why not just break up with her. Then you and I can get out of here, I mean, I have no issues kissing you” the Pantoran’s smile widened and somehow their aroma overwhelmed Rex, they smelled more like whiskey and death sticks, more than anything else. Slurring out their sentence as best they could, he didn’t want to do this, but the voice wouldn’t let him rest. The only thing he knew he needed to do was keep Neri safe, and pushing her away, breaking her heart was the best way to do that, only then could he truly keep her out of harm’s way. He had to keep remembering he was doing this to protect her. The voice kept telling him, if she chose to love him, she would die because of him. He couldn’t let that happen, even if it meant he couldn’t be with her, even if it broke his heart and hers; he needed to make sure that he closed those emotions permanently.

“Listen, I’m not here to discuss this, you gonna kiss me or not?” The Pantoran didn’t wait any longer closing the distance between them, her lips on his made him want to gag. Maker, he wanted to be kissing Neri, he wanted her hands caressing his face now, not this woman’s hands, not this woman’s lips. Her smell, her taste, everything about her made him want to push her away. He fought to keep the tears back and to keep the bile pushed down.

“Rex?” He loved her voice, it soothed him, despite the fact it sounded hesitant and on the verge of breaking, it still felt like a breath of fresh air wafting over to him. Even more so being so close to the Pantoran.

He pulled back, he wanted to smile, he wanted to pull her into his arms, to give her the biggest kiss possible. However, when he saw her face, to see those hurt eyes staring back at him, his own heart began breaking all over again at that moment, he swallowed to keep his own tears from appearing, but he needed to sell it. He needed to make it hurt so bad, she wouldn’t question it, his hand trailed down the Pantoran’s arm, eventually resting his hand on her hip, he pulled her in closer. ��Neri, you’re earlier than I expected.”

“Why, Rex?”

He shrugged his shoulders, “Did you really think I would just settle down with just one person for the rest of my life?”

“I …” the tears started slipping down her cheek, she shook her head, she didn’t believe him.

“Come on, Neri. You know what Jili said is true. We’re good for two things. What, did you really think I love you? You and I both know it was only a matter of time before we both moved on.” Her face shattered, he could practically hear her heart smashing to pieces, he could feel his own smashing along with her’s. He hated that voice. He hated all of this. He hated the woman who hadn’t stopped kissing his neck since he started the conversation with Neri. Maker, he hated himself more than ever.

He squeezed the Pantoran’s hips as Neri stepped closer, causing her to stop her attention to his neck and moved slightly away, “I don’t believe you Rex. This, what you said, all of it, I don’t believe it. Talk to me, Rex, is this because of what happened on Naboo? Is this because of what happened on the ship?”

He couldn’t have her guessing what was happening, what was going on in his own head. He needed her to walk away from the idea of them, to walk away from him.“You think this is about some stupid virus? If you choose not to believe what I’m telling you, then that’s on you. Not all of us want to wait to be intimate with someone, like you do. Some of us actually have needs, we can’t all be droids with no desires.”

Rex could see her heart break even more, she didn’t even bother holding back the tears, before he even realized it, she slapped him hard, he had no doubt there was going to be a mark left on his cheek, it’s the least he deserved, the stinging caused his eyes to prick with tears. He didn’t want to do this, she was his everything, forcing her to walk away and the way he had to force her to walk away, he deserved everything she unleashed on him and then some. He wanted to stop this, he wanted to pull her into his arms, to kiss her with every emotion in his body, he didn’t mind waiting, he didn’t mind holding off on their intimacy. It made it that much more special when they finally decided to take that step. He was about to open his mouth, about to tell her the truth, when the voice rang clear again in his head, he would be responsible for her death. He couldn’t protect her, if they were together. The only way to protect her was to let her go.

She didn’t say anything else and promptly ran out of 79’s, Rex looked down at his drink, downing it one shot.

“You wanna go back to my place?” The Pantoran finally spoke up, leaning into his space.

“No” Rex stood up and walked out of 79’s not even bothering to glance back or pay attention to any of the eyes watching him. His feet carried him over to the alley beside 79’s, swiftly emptying his stomach, every emotion, every guilt came pouring out of him landing on the floor of that alleyway. Breaking her heart, seeing the hurt in her eyes, having that woman’s taste in his mouth, he could still feel her lips on his neck, he leaned against the wall spilling his guts all over again. ‘I did what you said, I pushed her away. Now leave me alone!’ He shouted to the voice in his head, he could only hope it would leave him alone that his actions would keep Neri safe.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Get a squad together, I need a headcount. We need to know how many we lost today.” The General’s voice pulled Rex out of his musings, as he headed off to help where he could; Neri had left the Resolute, getting on a gun ship and headed to the Defender as soon as she heard the damage they suffered was catastrophic, their lead medic was killed in the attack and they needed all the help they could get. He offered to go with Neri as support, but one look from her told him that wasn’t going to happen, he stood and watched as her ship took off heading to the Defender. Since the day he gave into the voice and finally pushed her away, he’s felt nothing but a sickening feeling in his heart, a worsening nauseating sensation that only grew with each passing day. He wanted to explain everything, to tell her the truth. He kept telling everyone he didn’t remember the Sith attack, but he did, he remembered every second, every minute of it, and every time he closed his eyes, he was reliving that horrible dream.

Rex watched as Vi walked over to him, she looked a little worse for wear, there was soot covering her face, a slight scratch on her cheek, she had been one of the lucky ones most of the crew in the hangar bay didn’t survive, “Thankfully, we didn’t lose too many ships, Captain” she began as she closed the distance between them, “we won’t have enough to mount another offence but the ones we do have aren’t too badly damaged, I can try and mend a few, using parts from the others, they won’t look great, but they’ll work in a pinch. Unfortunately, most of the fighter jets are out of commission, I’ll get a couple of guys start working on them.”

“Thank you, Vi, I’ll let the General know.”

“Rex, I gotta ask, I’ve been patient, we’ve all been patient, Nerium most of all, waiting for you to get your head out of your sheb, and tell us what’s going on, why you’re acting like this?” Vi had learned the truth of what happened, when she walked in on Nerium crying. Pepper had comm-ed her after Echo left tell her something was off with Nerium and if she could check in on her.

“Vi, we’re not talking about this”

“Rex, you’re in love with her. You’re head over heels in love with her, I know it, she knows it, you know it, hell everyone on board knows it, someone blind, deaf and never understood feelings or emotions knows it. The way you wait for her to take off and come back, the way you practically hold your breath when anyone mentions her, like you’re doing right now. The way there’s the dense cloud of sadness that has been following you since you boarded after our last deployment, you love her, and it’s making you absolutely miserable to not be with her. What you did … it doesn’t make sense. I know we don’t know each other that well, but there’s a reason for doing what you did, you’re not just some scuzzy dog…”

“Violet!” Rex’s tone was clipped, filled with anger, this is not what he needed to deal with right now. His Captain's voice barked through unmistakably. His jaw was clenched, and his anger was bristling, “We’re not talking about this! Understood!”

“Sorry, Captain” Vi didn’t continue the conversation, she saluted him before heading back to one of the fighters, fixing the power capacitor that had been knocked loose. She wanted to understand, to give him the benefit of the doubt. She always thought he was an honourable man, maybe she had been wrong, maybe it really wasn’t meant to be. She hoped that wasn’t the case, but maybe it was.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

I moved around the injured on the Defender, helping as many as I could, I kept my focus on the here and now and not on Rex. As much as I wanted to run into his arms when I saw him walk into med, and rip off his stupid bucket and kiss his lips, I knew I couldn’t, not until he was ready to talk to me.

After that night at 79’s, he didn’t come to find me, he didn’t explain anything, he just shut himself off to me. It was also the night we were sent back out on deployment, I waited for him to come back on to the Resolute. As soon as I saw him, I stormed up to him asking a million questions and he refused to answer them, or even acknowledge me, he simply walked away. Every time I tried to talk to him, it was the same reaction. Finally, I cornered him in his office and told him, I wouldn’t walk away from him, if he wanted me to leave, he had to be the one to tell me. He just sat at his desk staring at me, emotionless. I waited for him to say something, for him to give me an explanation, after what felt like an hour he finally opened his mouth, only to tell me he had a meeting with the General and had to leave. After that I refused to speak to him unless it was out of necessity, unless it had something to do with a mission or with one of the men. He didn’t seek me out and I gave him his space.

When I opened up to Kix about what happened, he was ready to kick Rex’s sheb, I couldn’t blame him, after everything we went through to be together, after nearly losing each other on Naboo, after the Sith attack, he just pushed me away. It took everything I had, to hold Kix back, he wanted to storm off and find him, put an ass-kicking into him that would rival the destruction of the first attack on Geonosis, but I told him there was no point.

There was something off with him, the way he acted and spoke at 79’s that wasn’t my Rex. Kix didn’t like it, but he agreed to let me handle it, for now.

The guys had been great, during the whole thing, they were there for me time and time again, supporting and comforting me, yet whenever they asked what happened, I had no answer to give, and eventually started crying, it soon became the unspoken rule not to ask.

When the Admiral was rushed in after the attack, I overheard someone say, the bridge had taken the brunt of the assault, my heart dropped thinking Rex had been injured or worse. Regardless of everything we’d been through this past few weeks, when I saw him standing in med after I walked out of the ICR - - unharmed - - I was so relieved, my lungs felt they could breathe again. As soon as the sensation of relief washed over me, I realized I needed to get away from him, I needed to be anywhere but around him. As much as I didn’t want to I needed to transfer, if it meant I could breathe I would need to leave the 501st.

“How bad is it?” The trooper before me, was asking as his hand clenched and unclenched at his side.

“Well, you won’t be able to go dancing anytime soon” I teased, “but thankfully it’s a minor injury, you tore a ligament, so we’ll need to put you in a bacta tank, but for that I’ll need to take you back to the Resolute.”

“When will I be able to dance then?”

“Probably in a few weeks”

“Plenty of time to ask you to join me then” he smirked, I shook my head at him.

“As flattered as I am, I don’t think so”

“You sure, I’m pretty light on my feet”

I chuckled at that, “Then how did you manage to trip on practically nothing?”

“I said light on my feet, not that I wasn’t an idiot”

“Well at least you know where your faults lie” I smirked as I finished wrapping his ankle before heading off to the next injured trooper.

“Wait” he called out, I turned back to look at him, “I didn’t get your name”

“Nerium, nice to meet you …”

“Flo”

“Nice to meet you Flo, take care of that ankle. Once we’re ready to take you over, we’ll come to get you.”

“Pleasures all mine, Nerium. Once it’s good to go, I’m gonna take you dancing, till our feet fall off.”

I laughed, shaking my head, heading to the next injured trooper when I heard someone shout across the room, “Captain” I turned to look at the man who walked in, Rex stood there eyeing each of the men. He walked around med checking on them, asking how they were feeling, most stated they were ready to show those tinnies a thing or two, even the ones that had makeshift casts on. I did my best to focus on those injured, when eventually, I saw his boots standing beside me.

“I need a report on the amount of injured and dead men” His voice contained the commanding tone, this was all about duty for him, nothing more.

“You could have just comm-ed me the request, didn’t have to come all the way here,” I stated without looking at him, focusing on entering information on the datapad on the trooper in front of me. Thankfully, he was still asleep after I gave him a sleeping agent, to help ease his lungs. There was slight bruising, poor man had been trapped under a beam until help arrived.

Rex realized he needed to stop pretending, he needed to be honest with her, “Neri” his tone was pleading, longing, it was the first time in a long time he called her his pet name.

I whipped my eyes up at him, my brows furrowed with anger, I couldn’t believe he would try and call me that, when he’d been acting like an ass for far too long. “Don’t!” My voice was a bit too loud, as a few troopers turned to look at us, I stood, walking away from the men, heading outside of med to give us a bit of privacy, every bunk, every square foot of that room was used to house an injured man. Rex followed without saying much of anything. I walked for a minute or two until I found an area that offered us a semblance of privacy, “You don’t get to ‘Neri’ me in that tone, especially when you’re the one who won’t talk to me and tell me what the hell is going on.”

Rex let out a deep sigh, “You’re right Nerium, I’m sorry.”

I was shocked by that. I hadn’t expected an apology after the silent treatment I had been receiving over the past few months, but that was all it took as the anger I’d been trying to keep contained started to escape from it’s hold, “Why? Why did you even bother kissing me? Why did you even bother telling me anything if you were just going …”

“I did it to protect you”

She let out a halted laugh at that, “Right, because going around kissing random people is how you protect someone or show them you love them. Listen, do me a favour! Don’t. Do. Me. Any. Favours.” With each word she stabbed his chest with her forefinger, she turned to walk away, Rex couldn’t let her go, he reached his hand out and grabbed her arm.

“You’re right, that’s not how you protect someone, but it was the only thing I could think of to keep you safe” His tone pleaded for her to listen, he was practically begging for her to understand that he was telling the truth.

Her arm that she’d been trying to pull out of Rex’s hold stilled at his statement, she peered into his visor, “You’re being serious?” Rex nodded. “There was more to that Sith dream then what you claim to remember, wasn’t there?”

“Nerium”

“No, Rex, you’ve been lying and keeping things from me since the attack, telling me you don’t remember, you can��t recall anything. Tell me the truth!”

“Rex, you have to tell Nerium the truth, she’ll never forgive you if you don’t”

“I can’t tell her what really happened”

“You have to, if her life is in danger, she has as much of a right to know, as you do trying to protect her.”

“Kix, I can’t …”

“You will, or I will.”

“You’re right, there was more to the dream. I told you I didn’t remember, because I wanted it to be the truth. I didn't want to remember.”

“Did you lie just to me or to the Generals also?”

“To everyone”

“Rex…”

“We need to talk, obviously we can’t right now, but I need you to know, especially because of the situation we are in, and I can’t … I can’t have something happen to you, without you understanding, that I was trying to protect you”

I didn’t know what to do, I wanted to smack him, I wanted to punch him, hug him, kiss him, tell him it was going to be okay, but I couldn’t, at that moment all I could see were his lips against hers. “Fine, once all the wounded are tended to and Ryloth is safe, you and I are going to sit down and have a very long discussion.”

“Nerium, I’m sorry for everything” he took a step closer, I took a step back. I felt Rex’s grip finally loosen, I pulled my arm out of his hold, wrapping them around my own torso.

“Nothing we can do about it now, and nothing we can do about the past” I turned away from Rex, going back to med, focusing on the next injured trooper. I could feel his eyes digging into my back as I walked away, I wanted to look back, but it was better if I didn’t.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

“Then before we knew it all four ships were destroyed, Vi had been able to get a few more ships operational, we took what we had and headed down to Ryloth taking out the bombers before they had a chance to attack the city”

“I’m proud of you ‘Soka” I wrapped my arms around her, as she sat there with me in my office, “Tell me though, truthfully, how are you doing?”

Her eyes began to well up with water, “I’m … I feel responsible. I let my men down. I’m responsible for the death of Axe and Tucker, not to mention the reason the Admiral got injured.”

“Do you really believe that?”

“Yes, I didn’t follow orders. Admiral and Anakin kept telling me I needed to pull back, if I had … I shouldn’t have ignored them. I just thought … we could pull it off.”

“I know”

“You do?”

I nodded, “Might not be in the same way as what you went through, but …” I shifted moving the chair closer to her, “This was almost a year ago it was during my first field practicals, I was part of a medical team that had been deployed to one of the more heavily hit areas on Christophsis. My trainer was with me, and ordered me not to leave the designated medic area, troopers would be bringing me injured men for me to heal. My trainer forbade me to go to the front lines, reminding me I hadn’t been trained on how to be a combat medic.”

“What happened?”

“We were looking after the injured men when I overheard on the comms a call for help. I could only get bits and pieces, what was clear there had been an ambush, a squad of men were injured and trapped, they called again and again for a medic, they needed help. My trainer was far away, the other medics were busy tending to the remaining injured, I was free, so I took it upon myself to go, and help them.”

“Against your trainer’s orders?”

I nodded, “I just wanted to help, but I had no weapons training or even proper field training, I couldn’t even tell you the proper end of a blaster, granted there wasn’t much that I knew how to do without supervision. But, I just couldn’t sit there waiting for these men to come to me when they were in pain, so I grabbed my pack and I went.”

“Your trainer found out?”

“Yup, my trainer, the Commander, the General, practically everyone in the area found out what I did."

"Did you find them?"

"It took me an hour, but I eventually found the men. I thought I was being so clever sneaking in undetected. I was busy tending to their wounds, I hadn’t realized the ambush itself was a trap, before I knew it we were surrounded by droids. The men did their best to defend us, holding them off till help arrived. Turned out the droids had followed me from where I entered the battle zone to the squad. I had no idea they'd been sent in to retrieve confidential and highly sensitive information that needed to be handed to the Commander. They had been able to avoid detection the whole time that was until …”

“Until you went to help them”

I nodded, “Thankfully, my trainer, the Commander and a squad of men found us in time.

When we made it back to base, my trainer and the Commander raked me over the coals, they told me if I ever pulled another stunt like that I would be out of the medic training program, and shipped back to Coruscant. At first, I was angry, beyond angry, I thought I was doing the right thing. After all, my job was to look after the injured and dying and that’s what I did. I stormed off when my trainer told me to wait for him at the landing site. I was sitting on one of the gun ships by the med tent, angry tears were streaming down my cheeks, when the Commander found me. I was surprised to see him, I thought he was going to ream me out again. He has this reputation and believe me it is well earned, as the gruffest and meanest man in the entire GAR, and when he yelled at me, I never questioned that reputation. But when he found me sitting there, he came and sat beside me, and asked if I understood why I was disciplined so vehemently. It shocked me, his tone, demeanour, everything was so different, I simply shook my head, his kindness really hit me, causing my throat to tighten, I did the best I could to fight the tears back. He explained the importance of the information those men contained, how he and his squad were taking their time to find a safe way to retrieve them. Turns out the information provided was valuable to the skirmish on Christophsis, I realized at that moment how different things could have gone, not just for me, but for the troopers, the citizens of Christophsis, everyone. He told me the only reason he was informing me was because he respected the fact I risked my life for his men, and that with proper training and when I actually learned to follow orders, I would be a good medic. Of course, I realized how foolish I had been jumping the gun, thinking I could be a one woman army.”

“Who was the Commander?”

“Commander Wolffe. Everyone always thinks he’s this mean, gruff, short-tempered man, and he is, but he’s also a man who took the time to explain why my actions were reckless, why I had put more than just my own life in danger. If it hadn’t been for him, I may never have taken seriously the importance of following orders. When my trainer and I were leaving Christophsis, he pulled me aside before I boarded the ship to impart one final bit of wisdom, as he called it” I couldn’t help the smirk on my lips, remembering Wolffe’s furrowed brows and smirk on his lips, “he told me, ‘when we’re in the heat of battle, sometimes we forget we’re not alone in this war. We have to learn to rely not just on our wits and strength, but to rely on the strength and leadership of those who lead us in battle too.’ He looked at me with all seriousness and strictness he could muster, which scared me to my very core. He told me if I ever pulled a stunt like that on him again or if he ever heard I pulled a stunt like that again while he was in Command, he’d shoot me himself.” I couldn’t help chuckle remembering the grin on Wolffe’s face when he said that, and that pat on my shoulder he left before walking away.

“That’s why you admire him”

I nodded, “That’s also why I do my best to follow my orders as best I can, we may not always understand why an order is given, and as long as it doesn’t put needless lives in danger, I’ll do my best to follow them. We have to remember the bigger picture.”

“What if you don’t agree with an order?”

“Thankfully, I haven’t been given one yet that I don’t agree with. However, if my men’s lives are in danger, and by following those orders I’m putting them in greater peril … well then I hope Commander Wolffe isn’t around.”

“Nerium?” I heard Rex’s voice echo through med, most of the men who were less critical had been sent to the defender, med for the moment was quiet and empty, as we awaited the more serious cases.

“In here” I shouted back

Ahsoka leaned in hugging me tightly “Thanks, I appreciate it”

“Of course, anytime. If you ever need to talk, I’m here, okay” she nodded her head against my shoulder.

“Nerium, Commander” Rex nodded to us, as he entered my office, “I can come back” he motioned to the door.

“No, it’s alright Rex” Ahsoka stated as she stood from her seat, “I need to check in with Anakin, anyways. Thank you, Nerium” she pulled me into one more hug, before heading out the door.

“Is she okay?” Rex asked, as he took his helmet off clipping it to his belt.

“I think she will be, she’s still upset about losing Axe and Tucker, but she’ll be okay. Are you here to talk?”

“If you’ll listen”

I clenched my fists by my side, this man was walking on thin ice, “If I’ll listen? I’m sorry, did you really say that? Really Rex? I’m not the one who has been avoiding me, every time I’ve tried to talk to you.”

“I know” Rex held up his hand, he didn’t want to argue, “I’m sorry, it was a poor choice of words.”

I let out a breath and rubbed my face, “No, it’s my fault, I’ve been working almost 39 hours straight, I’m running on poorly made kaf and adrenaline.”

“Bab… I mean maybe we should sit” Rex offered, I motioned to the chair in front of me, as I stood and leaned against my desk. “You sure you want to have this discussion now, if you’re tired…”

“Rex.” My tone left no room for questions, “just sit.”

Rex let out a deep breath, and nodded, “Where do you want to begin?”

“Start with what happened when we got back from Naboo, the Sith dream”

Rex nodded, he started telling Nerium the attack in detail, beginning with Kix telling him she didn’t survive, how eventually he tried his best to keep him from her. He told her every moment, but he couldn’t bring himself to talk about seeing her dead body in the coffin, calling to her, seeing her helmet along with his brothers marking her fall right beside them. Shooting her in the chest, having her crumple before him, holding her in his arms as her life faded before his eyes. Despite everything, he just couldn’t bring himself to tell her that.

My heart dropped listening to everything Rex experienced, no wonder he’d been pushing me away, “Rex, why didn’t you tell me?” I wanted to hold him in my arms, wanted to kiss him telling him I understood but I … I just couldn’t make that step. I needed to learn a lot more, it still felt like he was holding something back.

“I didn’t want to put the burden on you, love, I wanted to keep you safe”

“You keep saying you want me safe, but you’re not telling me from what?” I moved to the chair beside Rex.

Rex took in a shuddering breath, “Neri …”

I held up my hand “Not yet,” I wanted to hear him call me his pet name, but I just … I couldn’t. Not yet.

Rex nodded, “Are you sure you want to …”

“Rex, either you tell me everything or we just end this right now” I was done with him holding back, I tried asking, tried giving him his space, tried confronting, it all left me nowhere, so at this point I was done with him holding back. Either he was in or he wasn’t.

Rex nodded, “You’re right. You deserve to know. In the attack, Kix told me if I … I cared for you, I would be the reason you don’t survive. He kept me in my bunk room, keeping me from trying to save you. But it wasn’t just him, the dark Anakin he showed me … he showed me your coffin” he took in a shuddering breath remembering the image of her lying there.

“What?”

“Neri - um, I failed you”

“You got that from seeing me in a coffin?”

“It was like he was showing me the future”

“That wasn’t the only time you saw my death, was it?”

Rex looked into my eyes, there were tears welling up, “No. Dark Anakin showed me …” Rex swallowed the bubble of nervousness that was rising, “he showed me a downed venator ship”

“The same one that had the Ahsoka helmets lined up in front of it?”

“Yeah, there was one helmet that was unique, I’d recognize it anywhere…” his hands twitched, he wanted to hold her hand, but he didn’t deserve that right, “it was your helmet. Dark Anakin told me that my destruction knows no bounds. He asked if ‘there was anyone who will not meet their death because of me?’”

“Rex, don’t listen to him, it’s because of you, that people survive” I reached forward to hold his hand, but thought better of it, “I’m here because of you, Rex. I mean, you saved me more times than I can count. Not just because of your incredible aim, but because it’s who you are.” I bit my bottom lip, “You saved me from those stupid Mastif Phalones, held me when I had a breakdown, you even helped me with my aim, you were there for me when I was super close to kill that … okay, maybe I shouldn’t tarnish the memory of the miserable, pain in my ass, racist, war-mongering, late Chairman of Pantora.”

“I … Nerium …”

“Sweetheart” I shocked myself and Rex at hearing that word come out of my mouth, “um…” I shook my head, “trust me, those are just a handful of examples, and that’s just from me alone. You have done so much for your brothers, look at Fives, Echo, Kix, and even our General wouldn’t be here without you.”

Rex couldn’t help smirk at her, she really was his everything, “Do you ever doubt me?”

I wanted to tell him no, I wanted to tell him I understood everything, but I just couldn’t, I just gave him a soft smile, I cleared my throat, “Truthfully, up until … no I’ve never doubted you”

Nerium’s face didn’t hide the hurt, maybe she was too tired, maybe she was resolving within herself to leave him for good, Rex hated that he even thought that was a viable solution to deal with everything he was going through.

“There’s more Nerium”

“I had a feeling you were saving the worst for last” I chuckled, hoping to alleviate some of his stress.

“Dark Anakin changed to the Sith Lord, he was … he has his eyes set on you, Nerium. He told me I couldn’t save you from him. He sad you were destined for more than I could ever give you. There is nothing I can do to save you or protect you from him. He said he’s allowed you to be where you are, but he can just as easily remove you that’s when … he told me ‘it didn’t matter who he was, only who he could turn me into.’ Before I knew it, I was on the bridge of a ship holding my blasters at an older version of Ahsoka. I tried to fight it, but I couldn’t stop my finger from pulling the blaster. He told me in no uncertain terms, ‘leave the medic or be responsible for not just her death,’ I turned my blasters on him, and just as I was about to pull the trigger, the scenery shifted. I was on a planet, there were bioluminescent plants everywhere. There were the sounds of a lightsaber slashing, men screaming out in pain, I knew whoever it was, they were coming for me. I heard a noise behind me, and fired only …”

The tears Rex had been holding in came with a vengeance, he took in a deep breath, closing his eyes. He felt Neri’s hand go into his, he glanced down to see her intertwine their fingers together. She squeezed his hand, he glanced up to look at Nerium, he wanted to pull her into his lap, to wrap his arms around her.

“What happened, hun, tell me” I wanted to hold Rex in my arms, he needed it, his tears were coming in full. I couldn’t hold back anymore, I shifted my chair closer to him, I raised my hand, wiping away his tears, cupping his cheek. Rex’s shaky hand held mine against his cheek, he closed his eyes leaning into it. His bottom lip quivered as he took in a shaky breath.

“It was you. I killed you, I held you in my arms as your eyes closed, I couldn’t …” he tightened his hold on her, “he made me kill you, it was my job to protect you. My job to … can’t you see, I have to keep you safe. You’re not safe with me.”

“Rex…”

“No. Nerium. I hurt you. I hurt you when I was trying to be all about duty. I hurt you when I should’ve been your rock.” Rex shifted her hand from his cheek, “I need to protect you”

“Rex” I pulled his hands into my lap, “You’re not telling me everything. What are you leaving out?”

“Maker, I hate and love that you can read me so well” Rex let out a wet chuckle.

“Well next time you decide to do something incredibly stupid, know I will call you out on it’’

“Noted” Rex pulled her chair closer till his knees caged hers, he leaned forward resting his forehead against hers, he closed his eyes, feeling that familiar sense of completeness.

“You still haven’t told me, and don’t think a keldabe kiss is going to throw me off”

Rex chuckled, he didn’t have to look at her to know there was a very sarcastic and loving smirk on her face, “I’ve missed this, and you’re right, I was leaving something out. After we got back to coruscant, I kept hearing it”

“Hearing what?”

“The voice. It kept telling me over ago and over again, I can’t save you from him. I am the reason you die. I needed to protect you.”

“That’s why you kissed that stupid community bicycle trollop to get rid of the voice.”

Rex nodded against her forehead, “You have to know, nothing happened outside of that gross disgusting kiss, after you left, I walked away, and spilled my guts in the alley beside 79’s. As soon as I got back to the Resolute, I scrubbed every inch of my neck and face with a Brillo brush, to get rid of her feeling on my skin. I was trying to keep you safe, it was the best idea I could come up with, and let’s face it, you’re not safe with me, and I can’t lose you. I love you.”

I pulled back, cupping Rex’s cheeks, I looked into his eyes, “I love you, too. But I’m not letting some crazy hooded Sith Lord tell me how to live my life. I’m not going anywhere.” I wanted to kiss him, “Rex, what you said that night, about …”

“I am so sorry” Rex moved his hands to hold her cheeks, “I never meant a word of it. It killed me saying the things I had to say. I want to settle down, I want to love one one person for the rest of my life to get to know someone so well, I don’t even need to finish a sentence for them to know what I’m trying to say. I don’t agree - I have never agreed with anything Jili said. I know my brothers and I are meant for more. I want to wait. I want our moment to be special, to be something we will both look back on as the night we know we wouldn’t be with anyone else. That is if you still want me? I don’t deserve to have you in my life, I don’t deserve to be the one to love you, not after what I did”

“You’re right about that” Rex pulled back to look at me, his eyes glistening with fresh tears, “I know I’ll be hearing from people, telling me you don’t deserve me, but if I’m not allowing a Sith to tell me how to live my life, I’m not about to let anyone else, including you to tell me, either. From now on,” I grabbed his cuirass pulling him closer, “don’t push me away, don’t hide things from me. The only way we will survive this, any of us will survive this if we do this together, and fight against him together.”

“If it saves you…”

“No, Rex. You CAN’T push me away,” I yanked him closer, “whatever happens we’ll face it together, okay” his breath fanned over my face, “I’m not going to let you push me away. That means no more kissing random sleazy drunk girls. No more telling me things that will cut me to my very core. No more ignoring me and not talking to me. Do you understand, Captain?”

Rex chuckled at that, “Yes, love. I promise.”

“When I find out who this di’kut is I’m gonna make him wish he was never born, I don’t know who he thinks he is, or why he has a say on who I can be with and who I can’t.”

Rex tilted his head at her, “You think, there’s a reason he doesn’t want us together?”

“He clearly has some sort of plan for me, but why? That’s the bigger question, I mean, I’m no one. I’m not important. I’m just me, a medic of the 501st, an ex-Separatist who is head over heels in love with her Captain.”

“That makes you the most important thing in my life, love, because I am head over heels in love with my medic, and I’d do anything to keep you safe.”

Rex looked into her eyes, Maker how he loved her eyes, he loved everything about her, but her eyes held so much hope and love whenever she looked at him. He felt alive in her eyes. He noticed how her eyes flicked down to his lips and back up to his eyes.

Rex didn’t wait anymore and closed the distance between them, his lips crashing against hers, as his hand went to her hair, deepening the kiss. It felt right, after almost two months of not feeling her in his arms, not feeling her lips against his, she was back where she belonged. He pulled her into his arms, until she was sitting on his lap. When they finally pulled apart, Rex didn’t want to stop and began trailing kisses down her neck, when they heard the med door slide open. Rex pressed his lips to hers once again before they pulled away looking into each other's eyes.

“I’m not going to live my life in fear, Rex. Not because of him” Neri stood from her seat on Rex’s lap, fixing her hair and her outfit. Rex stood from his seat wrapping his arms around her, his lips crashing against hers, he felt her nails scrap against the back of his head, while her other hand wrapped around his neck drawing him in closer.

“I love you, Neri” Rex whispered against her lips.

“I love you, Rex, you know this means you need to talk to the General” I whispered against his lips, afraid that someone could probably hear us.

“What if Anakin…”

“Rex, trust me, you need to talk about this with one of the Generals, if you don’t want to tell Anakin, I can understand but then you have to tell Kenobi, or tell them both together. Anakin could be part of this man’s plans.”

“You really think what I saw was important”

“I do”

“Nerium?” I heard Hardcase’s voice filter over from the main room

“Sorry, love, but I got to go, just think about it, okay”

Rex kissed her lips one more time, washing away the horrible memory of that day, “I will, for you, I’ll think about it”

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imabeautifulbutterfly · 3 years

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Upside Down - Ch 10

Summary: The best intentions often lead to the wrong conclusion. Following episode Season 1 episode 14

A/N: Hello lovelies,

Another chapter. I’m so excited where this story is leading. I hope you guys are getting as invested as I am, I didn’t realize how many episodes Season 1 has. Anyway who’s excited for the Book of Boba Fett? I am, I think I watched the trailer like four times yesterday. Don’t forget December 1, will be the premiere of Sins of the Father and The Reunion. if you guys want to get tagged on those stories, let me know. I’ll be reposting those stories to get you guys all hyped.

Love all of you. Thank you for sticking with me during my writing. I know sometimes it’s not always gold. However, I always try to write something that I hope is entertaining. At least it is for me, yes I’m that kind of author that rereads their own work.

Warnings: Angst, I think that’s it. If I miss any warnings, just let me know.

Feel free to comment, leave some love, do a reblog, or all three. I love to hear from you guys, tell me what you think. Love oo. If you want to be tagged let me know.

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INTERFERENCE

“Captain Rex” Kix comm-ed early enough to know that the General would still be asleep, but not so early that Rex wouldn’t have been up already.

“Yeah?”

“Can you come to med, please”

“Is there something wrong? Is Nerium okay? Is the General okay?”

“Everything and everyone’s fine, just please come to med”

“On my way, Kix”

- - - - - - - - - -

When Rex walked into med, he noticed the General was fast asleep in one of the furthest beds and Kix sat at his desk going over some reports and charts.

“You wanted to see me, Kix?”

“Yeah, come have a seat”

“Okay…”

Rex was worried, Kix was eerily calm and polite.

“Nerium told me about everything that happened while you guys were planet side, the crash, the mastiffs, the Lurmen, the Separatist, the comments…” Kix looked up to focus on Rex’s eyes.

Rex swallowed, he hoped not to lock eyes with Kix but at the same time, he knew Kix wouldn’t be looking anywhere else, Rex knew Kix could wait, he had the patience of a Jedi, he would bide his time till eventually Rex looked him in the eye.

“Crazy about those mastiffs, right?”

“Rex”

“They were massive”

“Rex”

“And strong, when that one bit me on the arm…”

“You got bit on the arm?”

“It wasn’t anything major” Kix let out a sigh, and shook his head back and forth, he stood from his desk, grabbing his scanner and datapad.

“You know the drill on the bed”

“Kix”

“Rex, I’m not asking”

Rex got up from his chair and sat on the first bed, he was thankful he had time to clean his armour, change his blacks, and have a shower, not in that order, but at least the bed he was sitting on wasn’t going to get dirty from him.

Kix stood before Rex, not saying a word scanning his vod, everything came back … great, in fact Rex’s numbers had never been better coming back from an assignment.

“Well you’re healthy, so that’s good”

“Great” Rex stood to walk out, however Kix rested his hand on his cuirass.

“Oh, we’re not done talking, come on” Kix motioned for Rex to follow him to the room Nerium used with Jesse and Hardcase. Rex wasn’t going to open his mouth first, whatever information Kix wanted he would have to ask for it.

“Are you in love with Nerium?” Kix asked as soon as he entered the room.

Okay, well that was one way to rip the bacta patch off, “I think so … maybe … honestly, I don’t know” despite how he sounded like a shiny, it was the only response Rex could offer, he wasn’t sure what he felt, maybe it was love, maybe it was something else.

“And you felt it was good to tell the woman you love or think you love, that she had no pride, that you didn’t trust her, her training, or that you questioned if she was loyal to the Republic?”

“I never said that!”

“You implied it”

“It … It came out wrong”

“Okay, well what was suppose to come out?”

Kix sat on the table of the conference room, his feet resting on the chair in front of him, watching his vod stalking back and forth like a caged animal.

“I don’t know. I was trying to say I wanted her safe, but … it … it just all came out wrong.”

Kix rubbed his face, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Okay, so here’s what you are going to do…”

“I know what I have to do” Rex cut Kix off, he didn’t need to be told how to act like some shiny.

“Oh, you do?”

“Yes”

Kix motioned for him to continue, but at that moment all words and thoughts escaped Rex, there was nothing, he knew he needed to apologize but …

“Alright so I may not know the right words to say”

“Okay, so can I continue then”

“Fine”

“You are going to go to her quarters, beg for her forgiveness, tell her you are in love with her, and that she makes you so love sick you forget how to speak”

“Yeah … not doing that”

“You want to smooth things over with her or not?”

“I can’t declare something when I don’t know what I feel”

“Okay” Kix nodded, this wasn’t his plan for today, but enough was enough, “what were you trying to imply when you were saying she shouldn’t do watch duty”

“That I wanted her safe”

“Why?”

“Because I needed her safe”

“Come on, Rex, why?”

“Because … the idea of her getting hurt, shot or worse, makes my stomach turn”

“But why, Rex?”

“Because she needs to be safe, she’s been through so much already, I need to keep her safe”

“Dig deeper, Rex”

“She deserves it, she deserves someone looking out for her”

“You mean like Cameron?”

“No”

“Then who?”

“Someone”

“Not Cameron?”

“No. Not Cameron”

“What about Bly?”

“No.”

“Fives?”

“Pfft”

“Echo”

“Why are you asking?”

“Well you are determined to keep her safe, I’m trying to figure out for who? Are you doing it for me, to keep my vod’ika safe?”

“Sure, let’s go with that”

“Rex!”

“I don’t know, okay”

“Yes, you do, come on, Rex.”

“No, you come on”

“Rex, your her Captain and yet you tried to stop her from doing her duty. From doing what she was trained for, you need to tell me why? Why don’t you want her in harm’s way?”

“Because I can’t see her hurt, okay!”

“Why!”

“Because I fail her every time when she needs comforting, okay! There, I fail her. If I can keep her safe, then I won’t have to worry about failing her.”

“You mean because Cameron comforted her after the crash, and he checked on her before he left.”

“Yes!”

“Why does it bother you, if she is comforted by someone other than you? Isn’t it good she receives some comfort?”

“No. Okay. Yes. But it’s just wrong”

“Wrong? Cameron was wrong?”

“Yes!”

“Why was he wrong? Come on, Rex, just say it, why was it wrong for anyone else to comfort her?”

“BECAUSE, I DON’T WANT SOMEONE ELSE TO COMFORT HER!”

“WHY?”

“BECAUSE I WANT TO BE THE ONLY ARMS THAT HOLD HER, I WANT MY LIPS TO BE THE ONLY ONES THAT REST ON HER FOREHEAD, I WANT TO BE THE ONE THAT COMFORTS HER! OKAY!”

“COME ON, REX, WHY?”

“BECAUSE I LOVE HER!”

Kix had never been prouder, of himself and his brother, he glanced at his chrono, “well that only took 20 minutes of my life” Kix laughed out.

Did he just say that? Did he just say he loves her? No … but he does, he loves her.

“Thank the force!” Rex and Kix turned their heads to look at General Skywalker.

They both stood at attention “General!” Both saluting out of habit.

“At ease, boys. You guys done yelling?” Both nodded in agreement, “Well then, congratulations Rex, you finally admitted you’re in love with Nerium.”

“General, how …” Rex began

“I may have been near death on the planet, but I wasn’t blind. Nor have I been blind to the past few months”

“Thank you” Kix motioned towards the General, “General, I have been trying for the past month to get him to confront his feelings.”

“Now that you have Rex, what are you going to do about it?”

Rex let out a deep sigh and looked to the ground, “Nothing”

Kix’s jaw dropped, Anakin leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms, eyeing his Captain, “May I ask why? If you love her, why not act on it?”

“I … I can’t be what she needs, sir. She needs someone who knows how to treat her right, not say the wrong thing, not make people question her loyalty or her training. I’ll apologize to her for my blunder back on the planet, but I’m not going to tell her anything else”

- - - - - - - - - -

I stepped out of the fresher, now that I was clean, safe and my body finally relaxed after a good nights sleep, I felt I could at least make my way over to med. Kix told me to take the day off, but it just felt wrong. I was about to grab my medic gear, when my comm beeped. I answered it, but even before I could say anything Rex’s voice came through loud and clear…

“She deserves better, every time I see her, she takes my breath away and I can’t think at times. When I saw her fighting alongside Bly, I was completely …”

“Rex”

“Kix, I know what you are going to say, but I can’t be that man for her. Bly is a better man for her, than I am.”

I really should not be listening to this, I was probably comm-ed by accident.

“Okay, vod, okay. I think it’s a mistake. I think if you explained…”

“Kix. Enough …”

“Rex” General Skywalker’s voice cut Rex off, “We get it, your in love with …”

I turned off the comm, tears began to prick at my eyes, I should have known he wouldn’t be interested in me. Of course, he would be in love with Aayla, who else was fighting beside Bly, I mean she was beautiful, smart, a brilliant fighter and was a Jedi. No wonder, Rex freaked out when I was to take watch, he wanted to make sure she was safe. He cared for me but as a friend and nothing more. It also made sense why he got a little weird when I mentioned Bly and Aayla, I should’ve known. Oh, how could I have been so stupid?

- - - - - - - - - -

Anakin looked down at his comm, Nerium turned off the link, but when did she turn it off? Was it before or after he called out Rex for being in love with her? Anakin took a moment to search out her feelings, despair, pain, heartache, those weren’t the feelings of someone who heard good news. Maybe he just made this worse.

“General?”

Anakin looked up at Kix, “Sorry, what?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. Gentlemen, I have something I have to go deal with, Rex you need to tell Nerium how you feel, sooner rather than later, and please don’t make me issue it as an order.”

“Yes, General”

Anakin headed out of the med, he needed to fix his mistake before he ruined a potential relationship.

- - - - - - - - - - -

I was pacing back and forth in my quarters for the better part of twenty minutes, but I felt like a caged animal. I needed to clear my head, get out of the confining quarters, I headed to the mess hall, maybe some caf would calm me down. I was surprised to find the mess pretty empty, but then it made sense since mostly everyone was at their station, it was actually pretty nice to have it fairly empty, I grabbed my cup and made my way to the first free table.

“Hey darlin’”

I looked up to see Fives, I gave him a smirk all my usual banter and sassiness was subdued, I just didn’t have it in me. He sat down in front, reaching for my hand.

“What’s wrong, darlin’?”

“I … I’m just tired, it was a pretty rough couple of days on the planet”

“Nerium, I know you better than that, what’s wrong?” All his teasing vanished, this was a different Fives in front of me, protective Fives.

“It’s … it’s nothing, Fives”

“Come on, talk to me, you’ve always been able to talk to me”

“I know, it’s just …” I looked around the hall no one was really there, I guess what was the real harm, I took a deep breath, “I … I overheard something I shouldn’t have, and it made me realized I … I mean I wasn’t … not during my first deployment, but I thought …” I shook my head, “Doesn’t matter anyways because he’s … I mean …”

“Okay … I think I’m following you” Fives rubbed the back of his neck, “If I understand correctly, you overheard something that upset you. Something that you didn’t think you would have to deal with during your first deployment?”

“Yeah something like that”

“And this person you overheard, is … yeah that’s the part you lost me”

“I guess, I thought this person …” I thought about what I wanted to say, I pulled my hand away from Fives and rubbed my forehead, “I thought he viewed me differently, and I found out I was wrong”

“You thought he viewed you as a friend and he doesn’t?”

“Yeah, kind of”

“Well then that’s his loss for losing out on knowing an amazing person. Right!” Fives squeezed my hand, determination settling on his face.

I chuckled, “I guess. I just really thought we were good friends, but I guess I misread the friendship” I shrugged looking back down to my caf.

“It’s okay though, because you have awesome people who love you and awesome people who enjoy spending time with you like Kix, Echo, the General, Ahsoka, Hardcase and Jesse, those guys can’t stop talking about you” I laughed at that, wiping a tear, “Rex, loves you” I swallowed hard at that, nodding, “and I love you. So really who cares if one jerk doesn’t appreciate who you are”

“Thanks Fives, you’re sweet”

“Sweet enough to go on a date with?”

I laughed really hard at that, “How many times are you going to ask me?”

“Till you say yes”

“And then…”

“Then a date”

“And if the date doesn’t work out, then what?”

“Please it’s me, the date would work out”

“Sure it would” I propped up my chin looking at Fives, smirking, “Okay, so on this so-called date, what would you do? Where would we go?”

“Definitely ‘79s, then back to my place”

“So all of this just to get into my pants”

“Well maybe dinner too”

I laughed again, “Fives, your funny and sweet, and I appreciate you. But the answers a no, you’re like my brother, it would just be too weird.”

“You just bro-zoned me”

“Yeah, I did, I’m sorry. I know you want more from me, but…” I shook my head, my smile faded, “I’m sorry, I can’t …” I was doing to him, what Rex did, accidentally. The tears started to fall.

“Hey, hey” Fives moved to sit beside me, “I’m just kidding, I just do that cause I know it irritates you. I’ll stop. Please stop crying” he moved his arms around me.

“I’m sorry” I mumbled through the tears as Fives pulled me into his side, I felt his cheek rest on my head, as my head rested on his shoulder.

“No, I’m sorry, you were really tired and you were hurting already, I should never have tried to tease you. I was just trying to lighten the mood.”

We didn’t speak for a minute as I tried to compose myself, Fives hand rubbing my arm up and down, he was sweet, why couldn’t he be like this all this time, “Want me to walk you to your quarters?”

Fives felt Nerium nod against his shoulder, his heart broke for her, he wasn’t sure what di’kut hurt her, but he was going to find out. It didn’t take him long before he began to guide her back to her quarters, a few clones looked over at Nerium, wondering what was wrong with her. At that moment, Fives understood why she always tried to avoid emotional outbursts in front of people, he switched sides with her so she’d be protected by the wall and his body, pulling her in closer to shield her from prying eyes. Fives was getting lost in the warmth of her resting against his chest, the way her arm wrapped around his waist, before he realized it, they were standing in front of her quarters, inputting the code.

“Nerium”

“Hmm”

Fives tilted his head to look down at her, he tried not to chuckle seeing her practically asleep leaning against him. He rested his cheek against the top of her head again, poor thing was so exhausted from everything she’d been through, only to come back and find out some idiot didn’t like her. Maybe Kix, would have an idea as to what she was talking about, after all where was she when she overheard whoever it was talking, and why were they talking about her?

Fives slowly guided her into her quarters, it wasn’t the first time Fives had been there, but it was the first time it felt as though he shouldn’t be there. He didn’t want anyone assuming the wrong thing. Fives did his best to gently get her to sit on her bunk, but she refused to lie down, no matter how much Fives tried to encourage her by pushing her back.

“Nerium, you gotta lie down” Fives tried not to chuckle, she was practically out sitting on the edge of her bunk.

“I … I’m not … sleepy” Came her subdued voice

“Okay, if your not sleepy, look at my fingers and tell me how many am I holding up?”

Fives watched as Nerium tilted her head back, her eyes still closed.

“Three”

“Nice try, your eyes are closed and I wasn’t holding up any fingers”

“Liar face”

Fives chuckled, bending down to pick her up, and lay her in her bed. He was surprised when she didn’t fight him, as soon as he laid her down, he gently removed her boots, and pulled the blanket over her.

“Sleep well, darlin’”

Fives couldn’t help it, he knew there was no chance with her, but if she ever changed her mind, he’d be there for her in a heartbeat, for however long she allowed him. His hand reached up and gently moved her hair off her face, he leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. He heard her let out a soft sigh. Fives hoped whoever she deemed worthy to be by herside appreciated everything about her, or they’d have to deal with him.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“What are you doing?”

Fives turned to see General Skywalker walking towards him, his face stoic, his arms crossed, as Nerium’s door closed behind him.

“Nothing, sir”

“Doesn’t look like nothing”

Fives turned to look at the Nerium’s quarters, “Oh… oh no. I wasn’t … I helped her back to her quarters. She was pretty upset about something, and I thought it best she wasn’t alone, she fell asleep as we walked here. I just laid her down on her bed. No funny business. I swear.”

“Alright, Fives, I believe you. Walk with me” Anakin motioned to Fives to follow him, maybe he wouldn’t be able to talk to Nerium right away, but he could at least gage what to expect.

“Sir?” Fives eventually asked as they began walking away from her quarters. He had spent sometime with his General, but this was the first time it was one-on-one.

“You said she was upset?”

“Yes, sir”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure if I should tell you”

Anakin stopped to look at the trooper, “What happened? Is she okay?”

“I think she will be, just a personal matter”

“I see”

“I’m sorry, sir, I would tell you if it was important to the Resolute or to the Republic”

“Well, how about this, the morale of my medic is very important to the Resolute. After all, it could affect the rest of the crew”

Fives didn’t say anything, he simply nodded, “It’s a bit of a stretch, but okay…” Fives answered smirking, he looked over to his General who was smiling in return. Anakin’s hands were behind his back, listening intently to what Fives had to say.

“So you see General, I’m not sure what idiot had the audacity to say he didn’t like her, but I’m going to find out.”

“Actually, Fives, leave it with me, I think I know the idiot.”

“You were there for the conversation?”

Anakin looked at Fives, his face didn’t hide any of his protective nature towards Nerium, it was all there to be seen by Anakin.

“No, it … it was a miscommunication, I don’t think she heard everything correctly.”

“I hope so, because I don’t think I can take seeing her cry again.”

Anakin nodded towards his trooper, “Thank you, Fives, leave this with me, I will deal with it”

“Yes, General” Fives saluted, and walked away. Anakin let out a sigh and rubbed his face, yup, he screwed up. ‘Well, Nerium’ Anakin thought, ‘I hope you’re awake.’

- - - - - - - - - - - -

I woke up to a knocking on my quarters door, I felt like I had been hit by a Mastiff Phalone, man I wonder if this is how Rex felt when he was flung by that beast. More knocking at the door.

“Yeah, I hear you! I’m coming!”

I swear if that was Fives, I was going to smack him, regardless of the fact he tucked me in. Actually, I needed to give a proper thank you for looking after me, I also needed to properly thank Kix for giving me the day off.

I opened the door to see Anakin.

“General?” I straightened and saluted

“Nerium” Anakin laughed seeing her all professional, regardless of the fact she had no boots on and her hair was a mess, “I thought we moved past this” he motioned towards her arm.

“Right, sorry” I lowered my hand, and motioned for him to come in, “What can I do for you Anakin?”

“First, how are you?”

“Like I got run over by one of those beasts on the Lurmen planet” I sat on the bunk, while Anakin sat on the chair by the desk, my head rested in my hand.

“Yeah, first mission usually does that, you’ll get use to it, it’s your body dealing with the constant adrenaline.”

“Well that’s good, was worried I got sick for a moment”

“No. Um… so … about…”

I held my hand up, looking at Anakin, “If you’re here to talk about the accidental comm call, don’t worry I turned it off pretty quickly.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have” Anakin quirked his eyebrow at Nerium, hoping she wouldn’t want to kill him.

“Anakin, I didn’t need to hear that Rex was in love with Aayla, all right? I’m not even mad at him anymore, I totally get why he freaked about me taking first watch, he wanted to keep her safe, and I didn’t have any experience at that moment. So I get it.”

“Yeah … I was trying to help, but I just screwed it up. Listen, I shouldn’t be the one to say this, but seeing as I messed up, I think it’s fair that you learn Rex wasn’t talking about Aayla.”

I narrowed my eyes at Anakin, “Anakin, I don’t want to know who he was talking about.” If he was going to tell me that he was talking about me, I … it’s better if I didn’t know, better that I just think he was talking about Aayla than actually find out the truth.

“Actually, I think you do”

“No, I don’t.” My tone was firm and unmoving.

Anakin was shocked, that’s not the reaction he was expecting, “I don’t think you’re understanding me, Nerium, and what I’m trying to say.”

“I do. I know what you’re going to say. Because outside of Aayla and myself the only other female that was there was a 14-year-old and I know there’s no way Rex would be talking about a child that way, right?”

“You’re right. He wasn’t talking about her.”

“Then I don’t want to hear it, okay?” I got up from my seat and walked over to my bookshelf, looking at the space that use to house the book my father gave me, that was currently in Rex’s possession.

“What changed? Back on the planet…”

“I know, and truthfully, nothing changed, I …” I let out a deep sigh, I turned to look at Anakin, “I know what I feel for him, but I don’t think he knows what he feels, I don’t think he even has a clue on what to feel. Anakin, Rex is my best friend, before we landed on that stupid planet, we never had any sort of miscommunication, any cross word between us when we kept it to friendship. But down there … on that planet, everything changed. I felt it, I could sense he was about to say something to me, he was about to tell me, and then you were in pain, and those animals tried attacking us, then the Lurmens and the Separatist, it just threw us both off. If we …” I rubbed my forehead, trying to push away the pain that was rising in my head, or maybe the tears that were threatening to come up, “We were so close to talking about what we felt, and we messed up Anakin, we made it difficult to do our jobs, we were both so distracted ...”

“I disagree, if anything you guys excelled even more”

“Because we were angry at each other, well annoyed. I think it would be better for the both of us to keep it as is, at least until we both know exactly what we want. It’s best if I just keep on thinking he’s in love with someone else, and that’s what I’m going to choose to believe.”

“Nerium, please don’t make a mistake because of my interference, I was trying to help you guys out, I …”

“I know Anakin, and it’s sweet that you want us together, but I don’t know if I’m ready for that … if we’re ready for that. I mean there was just the possibility of it, and we lost our minds on the planet. Not to mention, it’s just a little over a year since I left Onderon. I …” I looked down to the ground hiding the tears that were escaping, I wiped away what I could, “I think this is for the best, Anakin.”

“Nerium, I’m so sorry, I kriffed everything up”

“No, Anakin. You didn’t. It just helped me realize, that I can’t … right now, regardless of what I feel for him, I can’t. Not until we figure out what we want, and not because people are telling us what we want. I’m assuming that’s why you and Kix were talking to him.”

Anakin nodded.

“Nerium, if there’s anything you need?”

I shook my head, “No, I’m good. Please don’t say anything to Rex, I’m supposed to be talking to him today, and the conversation will go better, if I can do this on my own terms.”

“I understand. If it helps no one knows I comm-ed you.”

I nodded. Anakin stood from the chair he occupied, he closed the distance between us, resting his hands on my shoulder, “I am truly sorry, Nerium. I should never have interfered. I’m sure Padme is going to yell at me for some time about this.”

I chuckled wiping the tears, “Give her my love, and tell her I would love to meet her one day.”

“Definitely, will”

Anakin pulled me into a hug, the gesture broke down any remaining walls I had up and I just began crying even harder. Anakin tightened his grip, he didn’t say anything, just held me, after a few minutes I started to feel an overwhelming sense of calmness fill me.

“Anakin?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you using the force on me?”

“Depends, are we happy about this or no?”

“I’m happy about it”

“Then yes”

“Thank you”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“I think we should do the holovid tonight, since you are off”

“Echo, I still have to work tomorrow, pretty sure, but I think Kix might be switching me to the night shift, it’s my turn anyways.”

“Okay, so we can do a short vid”

“You missed me that much?”

“Yes” Echo smirked across the mess hall table, lunch was almost done, and then I still had the day to just enjoy the time off. I resolved to go to the shooting range, if I had to be buying drinks every time I was on shore leave, because I had the lowest amount of downed droids, I was going to either need a pay bump, or get better at shooting.

“Well I’m back now, I’ll tell you what, if Kix does switch me to night shift starting tomorrow, we can do holovid tonight, but if not we can do it on our usual day.”

Echo let out a deep sigh, “Fine”

Fives was quiet the whole time we sat there.

“Fives, you okay?” I asked

“Yeah, Nerium, I’m fine”

Echo and I both looked at each other and then at Fives, “Okay you are definitely not okay, you just called me Nerium and not darlin’”

“I told you, I was going to stop”

“Fives, what’s going on?”

“Nothin’” He kept his head down.

“You know I’m gonna keep asking you?”

“Here. I’ll grab your tray, while you keep working on him” Echo reached forward grabbing my empty tray. Once he was far enough away, I turned back to Fives.

“Is this about earlier?”

“How are you okay?” Fives voice was laced with annoyance and anger, he turned to look at me, even his face showed his anger, which threw me.

“Wait, are you angry with me?”

“You practically breakdown on my shoulder and then you act like it’s no biggie now”

“Fives, don’t you get why I’m okay? Why it’s not bothering me?”

“No!”

“It’s because of you”

Fives was shocked he hadn’t expected that answer, he expected her to say that she talked with that di’kut.

“Me?”

“Fives, you took care of me, and were there for me. I appreciate it, and you helped me. You didn’t try to fix the problem, or try to take things into your own hands. You let me just feel what I was feeling, and I appreciate it; it made me feel safe.”

I placed my hand on his arm, hoping to convey how much I appreciated his care.

“Does this mean, you’ll go out on a date with me?”

I started laughing, “No, but I do have a gift for you” I leaned over and kissed his cheek, “Thank you”

Fives looked at me, his cheeks were tinting, “I’ll always be there for you, Nerium” he leaned over and kissed my forehead.

“What just happened?” Echo looked at the both of us.

I winked at Fives, “Fives and I have decided to elope, we are going to leave the GAR and raise loth-cats”

“Please tell me you’re joking, please! Cause honestly, Nerium, you can do like 100 times better than him”

“Ouch!” I laughed, I looked over to Fives, who was laughing as well.

“Yes, relax Echo, she’s joking. But thank you, for that vote of confidence”

“Hey, I say it like it is”

I rose from my seat, “Well as fun as this was, I gotta go. I’ll see you guys at dinner right?”

“Try and stop us” Fives responded, he held on to my hand, “Hey I was serious, about what I said, anytime, I’m here for you”

“Thanks Fives”

Fives watched as Nerium walked out of the mess hall.

“Echo, you really think I’m not worthy of her?”

Echo looked from Fives to the entrance, “Fives, doesn’t matter what I think. What matters is what you think? Do you think you’re worthy of her?”

Fives looked from the entrance back to his food, “No.”

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