#Lost Document

[izzydaninja]

When you spend hours of your day, working on a piece that you really want to make, and you're actually decently happy with the result, but end up overwriting the original document with a rough sketch of another WIP...

This shot was a picture I made for Sonic X Shadow Generations: One Step Forward, and Falling Back.

I was pretty happy with how it turned out, since it's one of the few pictures I've done with real improvement since my first time really drawing Sonic or Shadow, which was... over a year--to two years ago? Don't remember how long it's been, but anyway, I was happy with this.

Then, opening Photoshop to sketch some more, I noticed the document for it, wasn't listed in my 'Recents,' and was confused, until I saw the title for it, was listed, but with a different WIP sketch, instead. So, I ended up overwriting the previous save of the document of this finished shot of Shadow and Maria, without knowing it. So that document doesn't exist anymore, and I'm so mad about it!

It literally drained whatever motivation I had to draw... Like- COME ON!!! All that work!

#Sonic the Hedgehog #Shadow the Hedgehog #Shadow #Maria Robotnik #Maria #Art #My Art #Sonic FanArt #Black and White Color Fill #Eye Color #Accidental Overwrite #Lost Document #Hours of Work Down the Drain #Mentally Drained Now #*Faceplants in pillow* #Is there an undo button for overwriting a project? #I'd like to know #THIS IS DEPRESSING! #I'm literally Shadow in this image #and Maria is my document #A flashback #A Memory #A past that's passed #Unreachable History #AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

[winterf4iryy]

fuck all of you who decide to stay neutral. fuck all of you who decide to stay silent. fuck all of you who are not educating yourself about what is happening right now. fuck every celebrity that posted a notes app screenshot of empty words. fuck bbc and nbc and joe biden and the u.s and britain and nearly every western country and media outlet. fuck israel and zionists and privileged white liberals turning a blind eye. fuck all of you. israel bombed a hospital and hundreds if not thousands are dead and a father had to carry the PIECES of his sons in plastic bags because they were blown to bits. a resting place for journalists has now turned into a morgue. every day people are being killed and it’s being DOCUMENTED and you still wanna be silent and neutral and say this doesn’t involve you. your lack of humanity is vile and horrid and i hope you never know one moment of happiness the rest of your life.

#genuinely have lost all of my respect for a LOT of people in the past week #speak the fuck up #use your voice #it doesnt matter if 1 or 100 people see it #IT MATTERS #Repost videos of people in Gaza and what they’re documenting #journalists are on Instagram updating constantly #RESHARE IT #my ig is grnbrviv and ive reposted from accounts of those in gaza #sbeih.jpg has a pinned post labelled Gaza Awareness of people updating in real time #shame on you if you aren’t disturbed by the literally genocide going on at this very moment #palestine #free palestine #gaza

[hrtregulus]

I'm never trusting Word again. my beautiful wip, my beautiful beautiful little baby was JUST DELETED OFF THE FACE OF MY LAPTOP.

HOW.

#heartbreak #writer woes #frickyouword #lost document #WHYYYYYY #grief #writing #how do I sue

[ineffable-suffering]

Aziraphale, I love you. But you lied. And here's why.

Okay. I’m not gonna beat around the bush for too long. It’s time now for me to also throw my try at a personal Good Omens Season 2 Magnum Opus into the mix of already existing magnum op..i? Opusses? (Smited? Smote?)

If I’m honest, it isn’t fully my own magnum opus, as I read this meta not too long ago that made me go: „Oh! My God! That’s it!“ And I’m pretty sure a lot of other people have clocked this too by now. Of course I’m not saying it’s the objective truth but after having mulled it over for many endless nights and days, wading through the onslaught of coffee theories, body swap theories, The Metatron re-writing the Book of Life theories and many, many more, this is the one I think is most plausible and, if you look closely, most obvious.

And it goes as such: Aziraphale lied.

To all of us. All of them. And most of all, to Crowley. He lied to him. Well, he sort of did and also sort of didn’t. He certainly didn’t tell the truth. At least not all of it. I hear you ask: “OP, what the fuck are you talking about”. I answer you: Let’s start from the top and under the cut.

(Small note: this meta ended up being way too large for Tumblr, which is why I will redirect you to an external doc at the end of the post, where I have written it all down nicely and accurately. It's about 35 digital A4-pages long, just in case you want to save it for later.)

(Word count: 12.831 | Approximate reading time: 50 minutes)

Let’s start with a short recap of what happens before the Metatron crashes the bookshop party and everything goes to shit. The proper visuals for this are in my Tumblr post but I am absolutely convinced that right up until when the Metatron comes to take Aziraphale away and talk to him, the angel is fully ready to get into Crowley’s Bentley-chariot and finally ride off into the sunset (or Alpha Centauri-set or whatever). You can see it in his face and body language. You can see when the penny drops for him that a) Crowley loves him b) he loves Crowley and c) they can finally start their happily ever after. Aziraphale realizes this all throughout said Brielzebub reveal in the bookshop. And he’s such a lost cause once he does. 

I mean, look at that. Look at it. This (very shitty recording, sorry, I'm not tech-savvy enough to avoid the Amazon Prime screen recording blocker) is the very second Aziraphale realizes hat Crowley loves him. When he hears him suggest Alpha bloody Centauri as a getaway for Gabriel and Beelzebub, as Crowley has done to Aziraphale for so, so many times now. He finally understands what Crowley was trying to tell him with that all those times.

Aziraphale realizes this all throughout the Brielzebub reveal in the bookshop. And he’s such a lost cause once he does.

Right when Crowley suggest Alpha Centauri as a nice getaway spot to the two, Aziraphale looks at him and he gets it. That Crowley has loved him, has been loving him for millennia. Truthfully, they've both known that for a long while now. But there's a difference between knowing, wanting, craving and actually being able to finally have something. And that's exactly what we see on Aziraphale's face here. This is it. This is where it all starts working out for Crowley and him. This is were they can start their eternity together.

So from that second on, Aziraphale only has eyes for Crowley. He keeps physically pawing at Crowley with complete heart eyes, as if to say „Look, look, that’s gonna be us too! Finally!" He’s actually so smitten that he doesn’t even hear what Crowley is saying when he asks Shax if he can have back his apartment now because he’s sick of living in his car. (Also, what way to drop that bomb right in this moment Crowley, lmao). 

Once the Metatron comes in, the first thing Aziraphale says is that they don’t need to talk because „he’s made his position quite clear“. He doesn’t even want to talk to the Metatron, because in his mind, he’s already made the choice. Actually, he made the choice way before the bookshop showdown. For starters, I’m convinced that the Jane Austen Ball actually never was for Maggie and Nina but for Crowley and him (you can read more about that here). And apart from that, for this whole season we have seen Aziraphale trying to advance his relationship with Crowley romantically and domestically and move them to the literal next base (our car!). And after everything he just witnessed with Brielzebub, the final nail in the coffin of ethereal-infernal romance being possible, his choice is absolutely crystal clear: It’s Crowley. It’s always been Crowley and it always will be Crowley. And now it can be Crowley. They can be an us.

The whole of Season 2 is such a massive learning curve for Aziraphale’s character, with him remembering all those important pivotal points of his past,  and this very moment is the peak, with him not only understanding that Crowley loves him (because he certainly knew for quite some centuries now) but accepting that love, letting himself have that love, being allowed to want that love and taking that love and starting their new and final chapter with it. Nevertheless, the plot clock ticks for them. The Metatron saunters into the bookshop, evil and stinky as Metatrons do, and urges Aziraphale to come with him with his whole Take The Coffee schtick, which I will get into later. And Aziraphale, immediately sensing there’s Something Up, does. Can’t really turn down someone as high-ranking as the the voice of God, after all. Even if you were currently already planning how you were going to elope with a certain red-haired serpent of Eden. 

he next time we see Aziraphale on screen, it’s so painfully evident on his face that he is neither happy nor excited. Not even the slightest bit. We’d know if he was, thanks to Mr. Michael master-of-microexpressions Sheen. None of the usual “Aziraphale is happy”-signs are there. No blinding eye-smile, no giddy wriggling, not giggles and gasps. No, when the Metatron tells Aziraphale to „go tell your friend the good news“, his expression looks like this:

I’m gonna go out on an entire limb here and say: That does not look like someone who’s absolutely tickety-boo hyped to tell his demon soulmate that he just got the juiciest promotion and that they can both be angels and live happily ever after in ethereal eternity now.

This, folks, looks like someone who knows exactly that the news he has to break right now, are going to be tickety-shit awful and very upsetting to said demon soulmate. And already, from that very short snippet of conversation, we can tell that Aziraphale isn’t really given a choice by the Metatron. Because while the Metatron does tell him that he doesn’t have to „answer right away“, he immediately follows it up by: „Go ahead and tell your friend the good news!“ Very distinct and definitive choice of words here. It’s “good news” because it’s already been decided. Because it’s already a done deal. There is no “yes, no, maybe”. This is the only choice he’s giving to Aziraphale. Because it’s ‘Coffee or death’. 

And he already gave him the coffee. 

***

Tumblr won't let me continue this over a certain character limit and I am not even remotely done yet – so, I feel like this is a good moment to redirect you to the continuation of this insane meta before we're in too deep. You can do so right here!

I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions about this once you've fought your way through it. Hope you have a good time with it!

#good omens #good omens s2 #good omens season 2 #good omens meta #good omens analysis #neil gaiman #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #good omens predictions #i lost my mind writing this #it must be nice to be able to be a casual enjoyer of media #who doesnt spend 5 days writing a 22 page document on an angle and why he lied to his demon boyfriend #my own meta

[0xeyedaisy]

Random stuff

#incredibox #sepbox #monart #spiders #Okay time to dump my thoughts in the tags #The first doodle was drawn cuz it had rained recently #I thought Edgar would enjoy the rain (assuming it doesn't rain in the depths) #The Watcher doodle was me thinking about how the Watcher watches over everyone #He sends out his little spider minions to spy on ppl! #He sees everything through their eyes #The Edgar comic is what I imagine he did when he left the depths #While the docs say that they only found his jewerly and crown at the Gateway #I like to think that Edgar saw this new place and immediately stripped naked. Cuz it's funnier that way #He decided to leave his past life as the prince at the gate with his royal clothes and jewerly #or something like that #The last doodle is how I imagine Tam's illness spread across his face #The documents don't mention how exactly he got the illness #I thought maybe it started from an innocuous scratch #He lost his eye cuz it straigh up rotted away #Annnnd that's about it #I'm always thinking about this mod as you can tell. So sad I can't draw every idea I have orz #Anyway I'll contunie having thoughts and patiently waiting for v8

[katabay]

lmao these are ocs I made wayyyy back in 2021 on a personal blog and I don’t think I ever posted them here, so I’ll do a quick recap!

the guy with the blue hair is marion. he hunts demons! baron is a librarian at a university only because everyone else who was actually qualified for the position died and he really just wants to go home and take a nap.

that’s about it! it was a story I started on because I wanted to draw cool outfits and big monsters after spending a weekend playing DMC5 during the lockdown, but recently it’s been getting some more serious depth as I build up the world.

the original desire to give everyone fun hair colors has remained the same tho, that’s not going to change no matter how serious this story does or does not get

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!

#original tag #I almost started taking about all the historical documents that were lost when Japan was setting Manila on fire during ww2 #and this….open wound I guess of knowing what we lost and being unable to reconstruct it #also talk about war crimes! so many ph universities were sites of war crimes. All of that is working it’s way into the setting of this fake #school lmao. I thought it was kind of a heavy topic switch when I previously mentioned that it was originally inspired by dmc5 #so into the tags it goes!

[clingyduoapologist]

You guys remember that one time after November 16th during a completely normal ccclingyduo stream on the dsmp tommy launched completely unprompted into a monologue expressing his complicated feelings of grief over cwilbur’s death that was like a huge part of his character moving into season 2 and yet that clip is just like impossible to easily access

#idk if it’s lost but like #that other post has just been on my mind #so much of this shot just isn’t documented #like damn #little moments just lost….. #dream smp

[keiksy-cake]

Japan's third page from the Hetalia Collezione

I've been unable to find the perfect way to translate "(名/迷)言" for these contexts, so I said eff it, and went with "wow" and "huh" lmao. I still might change it yet again but this time I'm pretty satisfied haha, I truly think it just might be the closest I could get, as ridiculous as it is

all collezione pages

[Please note, I’m an amateur in Japanese and have to use various resources and translation machines to help me. If you notice a possible mistake or want clarification, please bring it up to me *politely* and not aggressively or hostile.]

#hetalia #aph hetalia #hetalia collezione #aph japan #I also chose the word “documenting” because in consideration of the word “always” I think it might also be referring to #Japan's long and rich history of diary keeping #idky but that “there is no escape” panel is always so HILARIOUS to me lol it's just so memeable #forgetting how to speak is also a mood. just one year in quarantine and I lost the ability to look people in the eye and speak clearly #even my handwriting went to shit and still hasn't fully recovered so I can only imagine what 200 yrs of isolation does to a man

[beetlewine-art]

This Manhwa should be called "Sovieshu can't comunicate" because half of it wouldn't happend if Sovieshu told Navier and Rashta important stuff, this mf keeps everything to himself.

Here is the most recent example from the most recent chater:

And she is RIGHT, why the hell didn't he told Rashta that he couldn't find her transaction documents? Anyone could find that document and find out the truth about Rashta's origins and use it against both her and Sovieshu. His whole plan could be ruin because of this.

And you can't even said that he didn't told her because he couldn't give less of a sh*t about her and is going to leave her eventually, because he did this with Navier too. Sovieshu never told Navier that their fertility problems were because of a mistake he made when he was a kid and didn't told her their divorce was temporal either (even if i doubt that Navier would had waited for him anyways).

Side note: I LOVE Rashta's angry face here and how Sovieshu looks so surprised to see her angry, you wanted a woman who shows emotions Sovi? There you have her and i hope she screams at you with all the air she has in her lungs.

#my post #beetlewine #beetlepost #sovieshu #rashta #the remarried empress #remarried empress #empress navier #navier ellie trovi #empress rashta #rashta iska #remarried empress critical #Sovieshu for the love of god talk to your wife challenge #i still can't believe that he lost her document in the first place #boy you are supposed to be smart wtf

[lumeha]

New reason unlocked for being pissed that Jeralt decided to just burn stuff down instead of, idk, talking to Rhea (ok I know why he didn't do that) or realising his kid was similar to his wife (??? there's NO way Sitri had a heartbeat she is literally Powered By A Crest Stone ??? Jeralt ???)

or

idk

leave in the middle of the night WITHOUT burning shit down actually

#barks.txt #:((( my dude BOOKS and CHRONICLES and ARCHIVES are important #like sure it's funny that Rhea is all “ooh we lost this knowledge (that I still have bc I was there)” #but at the same time #if those documents were chronicling things written by the Apostles for example #it IS a MASSIVE LOSS #she doesn't KNOW what went into their head directly #idk #jeralt #why #why did you do that

[this-is-krikkit]

so, @dont-f-with-moogles challenged me as such on this post and this is what i came up with:

as for the choice between those two front row cats, you might have thought Hange would be the red, aggressively affectionate one. but you'd be dead wrong.

because listen, this happens on the second Christmas day Levi spends above ground, and the first one after Hange unfortunately found out it's also his birth date (they confessed earlier today that Nanaba helped them break into Shadis' office to find Levi's record, and that is all they could dig up about him) and made, as he was afraid they would, a huge deal of it.

except he's starting to regret (yes, Levi is starting to regret something. no, he doesn't understand how it's happening either) thinking that was such a bad thing, because Hange has now spent the entire day with him (as in, took an actual break from their research and experiments), walked into town with him and took him to a tea shop that wasn't as fancy as he always feared those places would be (which probably has to do with how warmly the old lady behind the counter greeted Hange when they got in, but he's not going to pry about that.. yet) and discreetly bought and offered him the kind he liked best when they left.

and yeah, Levi's probably going to lose it when he realizes it was Hange's mission to lure him away from HQ today just so everyone could put together a surprise birthday party for him (and watch his reaction from afar instead of standing in a dark room and yelling out "SURPRISE" as Humanity's Strongest enters because, contrary to civilian belief, they are not a bunch of suicidal fools), and it will no doubt create yet another frustrating misunderstanding between them when he thinks that's all there was to Hange's behavior, but right now he doesn't know that...

no. right now, Levi's too drunk on the aftertaste of delicious tea, on confusingly comforting feelings about this day he hadn't associated with anything joyful since his mother died, and on Hange's insufferably irresistible kindness, to have noticed everyone lurking behind them

and right now, he's holding onto Hange's elbow to stop them from falling (because of course they had to walk backwards down those stairs so they could stare back at him as they excitedly ranted about who knows what and couldn't watch where they were going instead) and they're laughing off their own clumsiness and playfully mocking him like "hey, look at you on your higher step there, standing taller than me! this is so weird, i've never seen you that way before!"

and they keep yapping away, but his mind is stuck on that phrasing, and Levi gets so fucking... annoyed. annoyed at their teasing yet beautiful grin, at the deep brown of their scarf that so poorly compares to that of their eyes, at everything they've come to mean to him in the amount of time he's gotten to know them

and so, in a fit of insanity he'll blame on the magnetic pull they have on him even right now with their fogged-up askew glasses, he takes a deep breath, thinks what the hell

and goes with "well, here's another new way to look at me, shitty glasses"

and then he leans closer, and kisses them.

#levihan #levihan hc #snk #snk hc #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #levi ackerman #hange zoë #snk veterans #idek what this is all i know is it's Terra's fault #also it was either this tonight #or this idea getting lost in yet another wip document so #you pick. well no. i picked. ANYWAY. HAVE THIS. #mutuals #dont f with moogles #my stuff #have some levihan fluff after that trailer that was ANYTHING BUT #everything is levihan #challenge accepted #squad denial #aot

[theoppositeofprofound]

#israel #palestine #child death mention #sorry but this keeps messing me up #the children from the same families #the silly modernized names #the religious ones #the children who weren’t named yet #there’s an Al-amash in there #a former us rep named amash lost family #sheltering at a church #there is something about losing a name when you’ve just been given one #I have such mixed feelings about the usual brands of Look At This Sad Baby tragedy gloop #which so turns the worst moments of a child’s life into clicks #save the children fearmongering of all breeds is usually to be avoided #especially in an environment rife with anti-semitism #but there’s also a return of dignity from reading the names of the dead #and dead children have so few people who remember them to mourn #I’d encourage reading the document #there is nothing more devastating than the names of the dead

[everymeloneveryday]

chapter 162 page 18

#beastars #melon beastars #beastars melon #melon #chapter 162 #what always gets me is that she lets him do this #she lets her son kill her #like there is absolutely no doubt that she abused him #she loved his papa so much something broke in her when he left and instead of learning to cope like a normal person she... #i have sympathy for a woman who clearly needed a lot of help and in the absence of that ended up abusing her child #but thats about where it ends #she deserved to die for what she did as much as she deserved to be helped #anyway unrelated to melomama sometimes i think about what happened to him after this #like chances are they wouldve tried to find the next of kin to dump him on #but considering how hybrids are viewed by society and how isolated melomama is AND how hard he was to track down by the police #chances are he just got lost in the foster system #having a fully fledged PhD by 23/24 is fuckin INSANE btw he wouldve had to skip grades n get into college courses by 12 at the latest #which means btw on pretty much all his legal documentation hes probably JUST marked as a gazelle #lol. melon. i think about him every day

[politemenacephd]

Question: So, if Miguel knows spider!reader in Arachnophilia, and spider!mig is mentioned in AFM, does reader know her own spider variant (personally or from Miguel/other spiders mentioning them) ??

I love both stories, and obvi the idea of Miguel & Reader being tied in several universes, but I was just curious on the idea of reader knowing.

oh im SO GLAD I get to talk about this THANK YOU SM cos its been on my mind for days!! I will use this chance to actually drop the dante fic cinematic universe timeline, which is: easing tensions - arachnophilia - a fortunate mistake - a fortunate mistake II There's certain things I gotta keep vague because I know how arachnophilia ends (and how it might tie into AFM II) and I don't want to spoil, but I'll talk about a bit because I'm rabid rn.

I wanna add for the sake of my lore on multiverse stuff, Miguel's who are turned into Spider-men are quite rare? I think this gets mentioned in AFM but Miguel's in general are rare, Spider Miguel's even more so. I took him saying Gabi's universe was the one where he was happy to heart, along with the fact we see zero variants of him in the society. That shit was always the most interesting thing to flesh out. I also don't know if I've ever talked about nena's multiverse story properly either, but its pretty tragic. She largely only exists in universes where Miguels' exist, and in all the ones where she comes into contact with him she dies. Our Miguel's universe is the only one where she doesn't, and Miguel blames this inititally on his canon but, as we know, canon isn't real, in reality it's because our Miguel was the only one with multi-verse experiences that humbled his apathy and violent tendencies. It's sort of like how meeting Miles put Peter B. on a better course, Peter's influence on Miguel is something no other Miguel had and it changed him in a way that made him capable of growing. Vig is the only other one we've met and it's obviously implied he was a poor partner who became a good dad after nena's death. Nena is like, universal collatoral damage, and it's only in the universe where she wasn't 'meant' to love him that she got to be loved. It's fucked up and she deserved better fr.

BUT I will say, to actually answer the question (sorry lol) the reader in arachnophilia is actually not a variant of the reader from AFM. I am sticking with the rule that AFM reader is never a spider, because its important later hehe.

BUT! But this makes Spider!Mig and readers relationship equally interesting to me anyway. I am a sucker for starcrossed lovers, excellent trope, and while it was meant to be a one-off I wanna use it to explore the idea of fully abandoning ones canon and exploring a relationship beyond the bounds of ones universe. I will be going more into Spider!Migs backstory for this, but I think the films never properly addressed the potential dangers/tragedy of love between people from different universes. I used it a bit with OG Miguel with my explanation for what happened with Gabi, E.g him trying to combine their universes, but this is especially spicy. So, again, actual question (I'm so sorry I swear this is all I think about, rip my PhD) as of AFM II reader also doesn't know about Miguel's variants beyond Vig, YET. Miguel is aware of Spider!Mig and reader as of AFM, and if you go back you can see a lot of his mindset in there, especially when he talks about not wanting kids because of his genetic mess and feeling like he's too dangerous.

Miguel as a character is great, I can't say that enough, he's harboring so much self loathing and unaddressed trauma that while he wants to do the right thing he imposes very strict rules that always end in hypocricy. In the same way I think he's awful to Miles because he see's Miles making the same mistake he did (e.g destroying the universe for a loved one) and a lot of his violence is like, imposed, he's awful to his variants because he knows he's fucked up his own moral compass and takes it out on them.

But yes Miguel knows where they are, he has not told reader though, but I do want to have them cross paths.

#im sorry this was so long #i truly am lost in the sauce #i keep wanting to do a big document just about the character differences between OG miguel and drider mig #because its fascinating #miguel is all i think abotu hes so INTERESTING #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x you #miguel o'hara fanfiction #arachnophilia #a fortunate mistake

[icewindandboringhorror]

There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.

#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz #ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and #then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc. #Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific #cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or #etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as #you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on #accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have #as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence #of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate #versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a #neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest #ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling #and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for #documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like #sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I #can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If #I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my #ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ?? #Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be #accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor #focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it #were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan #that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is #some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my #kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means #i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m #in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in #one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability #& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER

[ineed-to-sleep]

15 OC Associations

Saw @its-sixxers version of this a while ago and decided to do one too <3 if you see this prompt and would like to do it as well, consider yourself tagged(+ feel free to tag me on it, I'd love to see your ocs)!!

NAWEN FARLONG

ANIMAL: moth

COLOR(S): blue, black, silver, gold

MONTH: nightal/the drawing down

SONG: Fire With Fire - AlicebanD

NUMBER: 7

DAY OR NIGHT: night

PLANT(S): wispweed, daggerroot

SMELL(S): incense, lavender, leather

GEMSTONE: sapphire

SEASON: early winter

PLACE(S): taverns, castles, bridges, hideouts, abandoned temples

FOOD(S): mashed potatoes, soups and broths, bagels

SIGN: scorpio(cancer rising tho)

ELEMENT(S): water

DRINK(S): wine, rum, coffee

#found this lost in my drafts half finished wnsjkakakxkx it's been in there for a while #but anyway I love her your honor 🫠 #she is my babyy rogue w a heart of gold babygirl grew up in a swamp moved to neverwinter got coerced into becoming a shadow thief #went to baldurs gate at 45 got her ass kicked by the guild then abducted by the mindflayer ship and tadpole'd #I've got an app with about 20 different documents with notes about her and her backstory #as you can see I am very normal about her. normal and sane #oc.nawen #bg3 #sleep.txt