#Just Retired Guy Things (™)

[tampatom12]

Tom Brady out golfing while promoting his new Brady Brand x No Bull crossover clothing line // via Instagram Stories // Sunday, February 18th, 2024

#Oh Tom is out golfing AGAIN?! #Wow what a surprise lol 😅 #He loves golf almost as much as what he does football!! #Just Retired Guy Things (™) #He said “I need to golf and also talk about my latest clothing line 😤🏌🏻‍♂️⛳' 🤭 #I fr love this for him though 🥺🥹🤧😍💞💓💗 #Anyway...!! #Tom Brady #TB12 #Retired!Tom #Golfing!Tom #Promotional/Advertising!Tom #Tom on social media #Tom on Instagram #Tom doing advertising #Flordiaman!Tom #tampatom12.posts #Also!!!!: LOOK AT HIS CHAIN IN THE FIRST PICTURE!!!!!!!! #I fuckin' LOVE and am OBSESSED when he shows off his chain!!!!! It makes me feel so feral and all around insane/unhinged!!!!!!! #Idgaf that he's a little basic; to ME he is so handsome and cute and adorable 🥰 #That's my guy!!!!! #babe #love

[leatherbookmark]

"ed shot izzy in the leg because izzy blamed the poisonous atmosphere on the ship on ed's love for stede, as if it was something bad, when it was in fact good and made ed happy"

god help me. literally what are those people watching the show with because it sure as hell can't be their eyes. ed shot izzy for talking shit about his pure and restorative love for stede. ed "fuck you, stede bonnet" teach. ed "freezes when izzy mentions a part of stede's catchphrase and goes to threaten the crew with a gun as izzy follows him stammering that he did not mean to mention The Previous Owner Of This Vessel" teach. this ed. the same guy who literally went krakenmode after stede abandoned him and had all of his things tossed off the ship -- along with the crew, "his playthings". ed "you're not a fucking mermaid >:(" teach.

THIS ED. shooting izzy to say "you're wrong and you're fired, loving stede was GOOD actually". ??????????????

#shrimp thoughts #what's going on in this club. is it the water? it has to be something #also i genuinely am unable to understand how people can still think the pink robe wearing songwriting and talent show organizing ed was GOO #he WASN'T HEALING. he wasn't being himself! he was adopting the thing he thought were stede -- fancy fabric! Healthy™ communication! #'why are we even pirates? we should do a talent show!' -- to distract himself from his own pain! what are you people ON #if ed's true self was a pink silk femme songwriter then WHY would he embrace it AFTER and ONLY after stede has left him at the altar? #metaphorically? do you people genuinely think that ed was super fine after stede just fucking disappeared into the night after his #confession? that he was fine n peachy to Talk It Through with his crew? that he was in his right mind when he told basically total stranger #who still knew him as The Blackbeard to just call him ed? ????????????????? GUYS. WHAT. #and ngl izzy was sorta right to blow the fuck up at ed. the way he did it wasn't good and it's clear izzy's response to traumatic emotional #events is to just process it quietly on your own and move on because there's work to do so he's NOT well equipped to deal with baby's first #heartbreak but dear godddddd piracy was their JOB it was how they earned money and supplies to LIVE. you can't live if you quit your #job to make friendship bracelets and give each other cute makeovers all day! how is that a controversial statement! #but then people are still convinced cottagecore retirement is 100% going to be the endgame so. what am i expecting here

[laurrrelise]

the hutcherson multiverse™ has a horror movie night

WC: 2.1k

Tags: just a fun little blurb (i guess it’s a sort of big blurb) (also would this be considered fluff? i have no clue), slight spoilers for Scream , Toy Story 3, and La La Land (can’t believe i’m actually saying this LMAO), mentions of sexual fantasies, Derek is a freak, alcohol, cursing, horror movie mentions etc.

idk why i wrote this to be honest i guess i just love the hutcherson multiverse / jhutchverse LMAO

—————————————————————————

Josh opens his front door, a beaming smile on his face. “Hey! You guys made it!”

Derek leans against the wall outside the door. “Fuck are you surprised for? We told you we were coming.”

Mike’s overwhelming admiration for horror movies is hidden beneath his typically scruffy demeanor. “What movie are we watching?”

“I don’t know, we have to decide. Peeta and Billy are already here, we’re just waiting on Clapton.” Josh steps to the side, allowing them to walk in. Derek pushes past without hesitation, Mike politely following behind.

Derek collapses onto the sofa, flinging his legs onto Peeta’s lap. “Hey, bread boy.” Peeta gives him a half-smile while Mike takes a seat next to Billy on the other side of the couch.

Josh gets the door as Clapton arrives. “Hey, party people! We got beer?”

Mike gives him a look of confusion. “No. And even if we did, you wouldn’t get any.”

“You know what we do have?” Josh excitedly walks in front of the TV, grinning ear to ear. “Tons of food! Wolf hooked us up.”

“Who the hell is Wolf?”

Peeta sits up straight, mouth agape. “You have a pet wolf? Katniss told me she saw one of those before.”

Josh shakes his head at him. “What? No. Wolf is a retired demolitions expert who’s also a genius in the kitchen. He made us a popcorn bar and virgin cocktails, since, y’know.” He looks at Clapton and Peeta.

“Dude, you’re such a buzzkill.”

Derek pulls a bottle of whiskey out of his jacket. “That’s fine. Can’t fucking catch me unprepared.”

Josh ignores him, continuing, “Just… try not to bother Wolf when he’s cooking. He gets really… focused. And violent, if interrupted.”

They all nod, and Josh grabs the TV remote to start deciding on a movie. “Alright, what are we watching?”

Derek smiles. “You guys ever seen The Poughkeepsie Tapes? Or Megan is Missing?”

“Hell no. We are not watching those,” Billy says firmly.

Clapton stirs. “What are they?”

“Too fuckin’ scary for you, that’s what they are.”

Clapton furrows his brows. “I don’t get scared easy, asshole. I’ve watched, like, every horror movie ever. With a straight face… except for those.”

“Hereditary?” Derek grins evilly.

Mike and Josh both look at him. “Absolutely not.”

“I hope you guys realize I’ll watch these as soon as I get home.”

“Whatever, as long as we don’t have to sit through your disgusted reaction.”

Clapton looks at him, slightly offended. “They can’t be that bad! I seriously never get scared. Have you seen Cinderhella? I didn’t bat an eye.”

Josh changes the subject. “Any other ideas? Ooh, what about Toy Story 3!”

Everyone stares at him, bewildered.

“What? That movie’s scary.”

“You mean the one with the big ass purple fucking bear? That one?” Derek asks, a laugh falling out with the question.

Billy and Mike practically fall over cracking up at his genuine fear of the children’s movie.

Josh frowns as he whines, “Yeah… Lotzo.”

“You’re fucking scared of Lotzo?” Billy can barely breathe between his laughing.

“That’s not fair! The scene where they’re falling toward that big fire pit thing is terrifying!”

Clapton snickers at him. “Dude, you’re such a dumbass.” Derek fist-bumps him in agreement.

“And you guys are all bullies. Peeta, can’t you back me up?”

Peeta just stares at him, wide-eyed. “I’ve never seen it. It sounds scary.”

Josh whines at him. “It is!”

Peeta shrugs as everyone else continues to laugh at him.

“Alright, then someone else recommend something.”

Derek smiles. “How about-”

Billy cuts him off. “Derek, shut the fuck up.”

“How about we just watch some stupid 80’s slasher?”

“Like what?”

Clapton drums on his legs, clearly bored with the lengthy decision process. “I don’t know, Child’s Play.”

Peeta looks at him. “What’s that about?”

Clapton turns to him, giving him a puzzled look. “Have you never seen a movie? Like ever?”

Peeta shrugs nonchalantly and Clapton turns back to the TV. “Nightmare on Elm Street?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Dreams are important. Shouldn’t be mocked.”

Clapton rolls his eyes. “Friday the 13th?”

Derek shakes his head. “That one’s just boring. Absolutely not.”

“… and why is it boring?”

“Because I said so.”

Josh continues to scroll through a page of endless horror movies. “What’s this one?” He clicks on one titled Tragedy Girls and watches the trailer.

“Hey, dude, that guy totally looks like you.” Billy points at a man on the TV screen, then at Josh.

“He does no- actually he kinda does.”

There’s a moment of silence. “He kinda looks like you, too.”

“You think so?”

“Wait, he looks just like Derek, too!”

“Yeah, like a clearance version.”

Josh finds the coincidence too weird and clicks off of the movie. He continues scrolling.

“Is that Vantage Point? Why is that in the horror section?”

Derek’s eyes go wide. “It uh… sounds pretty scary to me.”

“Wait, is that the one where the president gets assassinated?” Josh looks back at Mike curiously.

“Yeah, but I’m pretty sure it’s action, not hor-”

Derek cuts him off. “We’re not watching it.”

Mike senses the sudden discomfort and changes the subject. “Blair Witch Project?”

Everyone unanimously groans in agreement.

“I give up. You guys pick.”

“Wait, I got one!”

Everyone looks at Peeta. “It’s called La La Land.”

Josh furrows his brows at him. “That’s not a horror movie, that’s just a sad romcom.”

“But they lose each other in the end. I mean, could you imagine? I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night.”

Billy and Clapton give him a sad look. “It doesn’t count as a horror movie.”

“Man, you’re so fuckin’ lame.”

“Detention?”

“No.”

“Five Nights at Freddy’s?”

“Nope.”

“For the love of god… Scream?”

Everyone exchanges glances before they all shrug.

“Alright, we’re watching Scream then.”

—————————————————————————

A few minutes into the movie and Mike speaks up. “Hey, that guy kinda looks familiar.”

“Who? Stu Macher?”

“Yeah, I can’t really place why, though.”

“Maybe Matthew Lillard just has one of those faces, y’know?”

“Maybe…”

Josh lights up suddenly. “We knew a guy named Stu a little while back, he was seriously crazy.”

“Who the fuck is we?”

“Oh! Me, Wolf, and Tiger. Tiger actually fell in love with Stu for a little whi-”

“Tiger?”

“Yeah. Tiger.”

Billy looks at Derek, who rolls his eyes before they both decide to drop it.

“Yeah, Stu was crazy though.”

“Well, Stu Macher is pretty crazy too, right?”

“Hey! Don’t spoil it! Peeta’s never seen this movie before.”

“It’s an obvious twist. He’ll be fine.”

“I don’t even know what’s going on so far.” Peeta looks at the TV, clearly confused by the plot.

“I think all guys named Stu must be at least a little insane.”

“Yeah, I agree,” Josh lays back on the floor in front of the TV.

—————————————————————————

A few more minutes pass. Billy stirs, readjusting himself on the couch.

A few more minutes. Billy once again readjusts.

Finally, “Alright, I’m fuckin’ bored. Let’s do shots.”

Derek fist bumps him. “Oh, hell yeah. I’m in.”

“Um, what about the two children?”

“Children?” Peeta furrows his brows at Mike.

Clapton sits up, gaping at Josh with an offended look on his face. “I’m 19!”

“Yeah, so am I.”

“You guys are the youngest. You’re going to be kids to us no matter what.”

“Fireball good with everyone?”

“Works for me.

“I got work tonight… but sure.”

Josh looks up. “Hey, how are you guys all getting home? I don’t want anyone driving under the influence.”

“It’s one shot dude.”

Derek smiles. “It’ll turn into seven. I’ll call my driver.”

“This is so unfair.”

Derek rolls his eyes. “It’s nothing personal, kid. You can drink all you fuckin’ want in a few years. Be patient.”

“Oh, like none of you drank before you turned 21.”

Billy shakes his head, standing up to make his way to the kitchen. He returns a few minutes later with a small tray and 6 shot glasses filled with amber-colored liquid, plus a few beers.

Clapton lights up when he gets handed one. On the opposite end of the spectrum, Peeta cringes but reluctantly takes it.

Derek, Josh, and Mike take theirs before Billy grabs the last one and they all huddle around the coffee table.

“On three, alright?”

Everyone nods. “Three… t-”

“One, bottoms up.” Derek throws his back, not even flinching.

Everyone else takes theirs, and Mike and Josh wince with the strength in the taste of the liquor. “How can you do that without even making a face?”

Derek chuckles. “Are we just fucking meeting for the first time, Mike?”

Billy watches Clapton’s face as he realizes that his shot was actually apple juice. Peeta lights up, smiling with excitement. “Dude!”

“Is that juice? We only got this stuff in the Capitol. Can I have another?”

“You’re an ass, you know that?”

Billy ignores Clapton and grabs the bottle of apple juice from the kitchen.

Peet’s takes it, sort of confused. “… where’s the… cup?”

Billy waves him off, twisting the cap off of a beer. “Knock yourself out, kid.”

Peeta smiles and throws the cap off of the bottle, chugging it eagerly. Everyone else takes their reserved spots again and continue watching the movie.

Derek squints at the screen. “’m gonna get one of those masks after this.”

Josh gives him a confused look. “…Why?”

“You planning on going on a murder spree? I can add some names to your list.”

Derek looks at Billy. “No, I’m just imagining, like, bringing someone to my room while I’m wearing all black and one of those and then sneaking up behind them and ripping-”

“Dude!”

Derek pauses. “Don’t fuckin’ interrupt me, that was a good idea.”

“There are two kids sitting next to you.”

“I’m 19! Stop calling me a kid!”

Peeta shrugs. “Y’know what? I actually don’t mind. It would be nice to be a kid again.”

“They’re not kids. They know what sex is.”

Clapton sinks into the ground slightly. “Yeah, obviously I know what it is.”

“Katniss and I are taking it slow.”

Derek looks at Mike. “See?”

“It doesn’t matter. No one wants to hear about your weird sexual fantasies.”

“I didn’t think it was weird. That sounds hot.”

Derek looks at him excitedly. “Right?”

Billy nods, taking a sip of his beer. “For sure.”

“Alright, you two talk about that stuff later. The rest of us don’t want to hear about any of that.”

“I don’t mind. I need all the tips I can get.”

Clapton furrows his eyebrows at Peeta. “I don’t think Katniss would want you to seduce her in a horror movie mask.”

“Why not?”

“Because that isn’t a normal sexual interaction. Derek is just… uh… very experienced.”

“Damn right I am.”

“Well… what is a normal sexual interaction?”

Derek smiles, sitting up and crossing his snakeskin boots in Peeta’s lap. “I’ve got so much to teach you. Alright, first, be aggressive. Girls like that. You want to alway-”

“How about we just watch the movie?”

Derek scoffs, rolling his eyes and melting back down against the couch. “How about we take another shot?”

—————————————————————————

They eventually finish the movie, but Derek and Billy are fairly intoxicated by the end of it. Derek calls a car to drive them all home.

Billy tends to forget about personal space when he’s drunk. “Thanks for having me, buddy,” he practically yells as he leans against Josh, his mouth brushing his ear.

Josh pats him on the back, clearly uncomfortable. “Yeah… no problem, man.”

“See- mph. See you tomorrow, Joosh.” Derek stumbles slightly as he walks out of the house.

“What? To- tomorrow?”

Derek nods, not turning back as he walks down the driveway. “Yeah, we’ll be back tomorrow.” He gets into the dark limousine, Billy following behind him.

Peeta and Clapton stand in the doorway, Mike still putting on his boots.

“We get to ride in a limo?” Clapton grins.

“Actually, I’ll uh… I’ll call you guys an uber. There’s no way in hell that they aren’t about to go to a bar.”

“Goddamn it,” Mike appears behind them, watching as Derek’s head hangs out the window like a dog as the car drives off.

“Tomorrow, Futturman!”

Josh signs. “Goddamn it is right.”

—————————————————————————

thanks for reading! this was so stupid but it’s just fun to create the jhutchverse so let me self indulge please :)

(this is a late update but i just remembered @xcherryerim wanted to be tagged in jhutchverse stuff, here you go monica, ly <3)

also i know this is barely about the actual movie and more about the banter but that’s the fun part so i don’t care 💀 sorry if you wanted to hear me talk about scream (i’ve actually never seen it but i know the general plot don’t kill me)

have a good day babes <3

#josh hutcherson #jhutch #jhutch1992 #jhutchverse #hutcherson multiverse #billy burn #billy burn 2019 #burn 2019 #derek danforth #derek danforth x reader #derek danforth x you #derek danforth smut #the beekeeper #mike schmidt #mike schmidt fnaf #fnaf movie #mike schimdt x reader #mike schmidt smut #mike schmidt x you #clapton davis #clapton davis detention #detention 2011 #detention #peeta mellark #the hunger games #thg #peeta mellark thg #thg movie #thg movies #josh futturman

[silverraes]

10 BL Boys I Want Carnally

10 BL Boys That Make Me Feel Things™

(not sexual, not romantic but a secret third thing)

okay so I wasn't exactly tagged in this but I saw several people doing this and I'll take just about any excuse to scream about my favorite characters so I'm just going to very sneakily join in on this trend 👀

there is absolutely no ranking to these bc I couldn't rank them if I wanted to

(also I changed the name a little bc my ace ass is literally physically incapable of wanting anyone carnally but I still have lots of thoughts lmao)

1) Tharn (The Sign)

I mean. is literally anyone surprised that this is where we're starting?

he's the nicest person out there. he can kick your ass if he wants to. he lost his parents at a young age and is absolutely convinced that everyone he loves is doomed to die and he keeps seeing visions of people dying and he's told again and again that those he has wronged in a past life - which he doesn't even remember - are still out to get him and yet he has so much kindness left for the world??

also he can be such a little shit and knows exactly how to tease Phaya back I love him so goddamn much.

(also that mole-)

2) Kim (Kinnporsche)

was he also on my characters I'd hit with my car list? maybe. and what about it.

I love him so much. he's such a badass but he's such a loser. famous singer who falls for a fan he was supposed to be investigating but is too emotionally constipated to admit it. badass son of a mafia family who can kick ass but only if he wants to. who does it like him honestly

(it also helps that he's played by just about the prettiest man alive)

3) Babe (Pit Babe)

did I start watching this show ironically? yes. is every mention of alphas and mpreg and that mama/papa thing hitting me like a brick and causing me 9000 psychic damage every single time? also yes. did I absolutely fall in love with the show and just about every character in it? you bet your fucking ass I did.

but I especially love Babe. he's just so babygirl. special alpha man who has to act tough and strong but just wants to be babied by his dumbass loser (affectionate) alpha boyfriend. like, he's actually so goddamn soft?? I love him.

4) Guy (Bake Me Please)

I think we all knew this was coming. I was literally gushing about him for half of the episodes. Guy my beloved. that show did not deserve you.

he spends the entire show supporting his crush's every decision and trying to make sure he's okay literally how could you not love this man

(yes he was a petty bitch for like 5 minutes there but he immediately apologized for it the next episode. properly. unlike certain other people-)

5) Sprite (Twins)

he's so himbo coded. himbo of all himbos. the himboest. not a brain cell in that head. he's my little dumbass I love him.

he deserves so much better than what he's being put through. someone please just love and support him for who he is. and also take him away from that family

(please talk to your boyfriend tho I am begging)

6) Wei Wuxian (The Untamed)

MY BELOVED. I could write essays about him. he's such a great character I love him so fucking much. if you ever had to bear witness to me talking about him.. I am so sorry.

sassy emo bitch with a flute and a tragic backstory who's seen as evil by just about everyone but only ever had the best intentions. absolute fucking dumbass. kicks ass. always smiling despite the circumstances. loves his siblings so damn much. doomed by the narrative. what more could you possibly ask for

7) Zhou Zishu (Word of Honor)

I'm trying so damn hard to keep this list to one character per show and it really took me a while to decide if I wanted to include him or Wen Kexing but ultimately it was Zhou Zishu for me

just.. god. him. assassin sect leader just trying to retire who keeps getting dragged into the biggest bullshit but doesn't really mind bc the bullshit comes with a mysterious pretty man. also that whole god damn nail thing. I have so many thoughts and feelings about that but this post would get too long if I got started on those-

(also actually pulling the "I'm literally dying" card to get out of chores is so fucking valid of him. more characters should do that)

8) Milk (Choco Milk Shake)

he is quite fucking literally a reincarnated cat, of course I love him. I could list reasons for why I love him but it would be the exact same reasons just about every cat person on earth lists for why they love cats so. but here's a quick summary, just in case:

petty. dramatic. knocks over glasses. silently loves you so fucking much.

9) Tew (My Dear Gangster Oppa)

I really did not expect to love him this much? greenest of green flags (except for the plot line we shall not talk about). can and will kill people and is fine with it (seriously it is so refreshing to see a mafia character not having a huge moral dilemma about being in the mafia). both a badass mafia man and a gamer guy who doesn't know how to talk to people and is absolutely whipped for his gamer bf.

also scars make a person just about 110x more attractive I don't make the rules. even if the scars are weird and yellow, it's the thought that counts.

10) Tian (A Tale of Thousand Stars)

I? love him??

I just love how he sets out to do something for someone he didn't even know because he feels like this person deserves that much at least and how he ends up genuinely loving and caring for those kids and the village and this inner conflict he's having the entire time but hiding oh so well and how he actually calls out his parents on their rich people bs and-

tagging everyone who reads this far and wants to do it. seriously. I mean it. if you want to do this, please go ahead and say I tagged you. I love reading everyone's thoughts.

#this list is just me going “i love him sm” ten times in a row lmao #apparently my type is just pretty man who is secretly a loser nerd #the sign the series #kinnporsche #pit babe the series #bake me please the series #twins the series #the untamed #word of honor #choco milk shake #my dear gangster oppa #a tale of thousand stars #thai bl #kbl #danmei

[fallenclan]

seeing as though hailcrash is starting to get older, i've scrapped together a list of contenders for deputy for when/if she retires. i tried to pick younger cats, as many of the cats i'd probably want for deputy are getting quite old </3

daisypetal: her charismatic personality would allow her to be knowledgable about interpersonal dynamics within the clan. she's a cat who i'd place as "in the loop," being both the mate of a medicine cat and being a charming individual. she would know how to inspire a clan and would be good at supporting maplestar when he begins to doubt himself.

beefreckle OR hawkwish: i'm grouping these two together because they both have the "righteous" trait. beefreckle is honestly just sort of a Guy™ but this actually works in his favor. he could be developed into any sort of personality. i also just like righteous cats. they tend to create drama with their strong definitions of right and wrong.

rowanleaf: doesn't exactly strike me as the type to want a leadership position, but i think it'd be cool to have one of moxieoak's kids as a deputy or leader. same goes for willowsplash.

sleepycloud: a diligent and kind-hearted warrior. his cautious nature would make it so that he isn't going to jump to any conclusions right away. he wants to hear all sides of things, hence the "good mediator" trait as well. he would be a well-liked deputy, but i'm not sure whether he has the "tactical" mindset needed for planning patrols.

yewberry: he has some deep-seated insecurites, however after becoming mates with brambletuft and becoming a father, i believe he feels a lot more confident in himself. him being ambitious is interesting to me. i feel like yewberry thinks he has a lot to "prove." he thinks his reputation has been tainted by otterslip, and he wants to be better than his father. i believe yewberry would want to be deputy, but whether he would make a good deputy is still in question.

poppyfeather: a very laid back and chill lady. she has the same charisma that would benefit daisypetal but poppyfeather is also an eloquent speaker. she knows what to say to get cats to listen, and she has the clan's best interests at heart. i just think she's a cool gal.

yellowjay: she has a lot of confidence and energy. on top of being bold, i imagine that she's actually quite clever. in a time of war especially, yellowjay isn't going to hesitate. hesitation can cost lives... but so can rashness. she's adventurous which makes me think she's open to new ideas. yellowjay wouldn't feel strongly about tradition like a more righteous or strict cat might. she looks to the future, not the past.

fernslug: adding her because a lot of people seem to like the idea of a fernstar. i'm not against this at all! however i personally don't think she would want to be deputy or leader. she's just a silly who likes slugs. politics and taking care of an entire clan seems a bit much for her (reasonably).

moosefall: he's kind but perhaps a little too forgiving, in my mind. he seems like someone who is extremely caring/loving but is also easily influenced (he isn't a pushover by any means, but i think he's someone who deeply values the input of his loved ones, even if that input isn't always the best for him or the clan). i think maplestar would see a lot of his younger self in moosefall, too.

antbite: his strictness would help in a time of war, although his youth works against him. similarly to yellowjay, i think antbite would have a very strategic mindset, but even moreso than her. he would be a brilliant deputy in a time of war, but in a time of peace? who knows. i like the idea of him becoming deputy at such a young age and excelling as deputy, but as soon as the war with shallowclan ends he's sort of left in the water, where he isn't sure what to do. i think once he's older, he would be a good deputy during both peace and war, but at his current age maybe not. lots of potential with this one....

mossfrog: she's young, yes, but also very clever. she sees things that others often miss. i feel like she's the type to be a prodigy in all things, but this also leads to her crushing sense of loneliness. she finds it hard to relate to other cats most of the time. she would be an excellent leader/deputy but find herself lacking when it comes ot interpersonal relationships among the clan. she's definitely at risk of "gifted kid burnout." mossfrog is probably one of my favorite contenders on this list!

cats i'd add if not for their age: evie, bluefern, blizzardfang, crowflame, applebranch, wormshade, flyspots, pinefrost

i'm curious to know what you and others think. maybe at some point there could be a poll (could be cats on this list or any you think are fitting) over who should be deputy at some point?

-🐉 (ended up not being busy like i thought i would be! yay! which means more rambling about fictional cats and my Thoughts about them... i'm sorry for the long ask but i can't promise i won't send more long asks in the future)

ooo, i LOVE how well thought out this is,, excellent notes on all of the cats overall, and i have some additions!

daisypetal - not someone i had considered previously, but certainly would be a good choice! i feel like she's a good mix of logical, social, and silly. they're 77 moons currently, so maybe a Little on the older side, but depending on who the leader was at the time, still an excellent choice

beefreckle or hawkwish - both good choices!! i really like the idea of beefreckle especially--i think hawkwish would be a fun choice, but she had the nervous trait for most of her life before becoming righteous, vs beefreckle who had the wise trait. i think they'd both do pretty well, though (and now im imagining beefreckle getting a life from spiderclaw AUGH)

rowanleaf - BIG agree on your stance, i don't think she'd necessarily want to be in a position of power but i do think it would be cool to have a moxieoak descendant as leader/deputy. i wouldn't necessarily say shameless would be the best trait for that, but it is funny to imagine lmao. plus my girl needs to do more interesting things, i've only drawn her like 4 times wtf

sleepycloud - also a really good choice!! he has the Good Mediator trait so i feel like he's good with the social aspect of things, and he's very kind. like you said, though, i'm not sure if he has the "tactical" mindset per se

yewberry - i LOVE yewberry and i'd love to see him as leader/deputy,,, he'd be a good choice too i think. i also love the idea of him feeling like he has a lot to prove, especially since Otterslip.

poppyfeather - until recently, i absolutely would have agreed with your statement, but she appears to no longer be such a laid-back kitty. recently she aquired the vengeful trait, which came out of Nowhere to me, though tbf i think that would make for some very interesting stuff, story-wise

yellowjay - definitely leans on the impulsive side, but i agree with you saying that isn't always a bad thing. she would for sure be an interesting choice, though idk how responsible she is--she always struck me as the type to goof off a lot, which is good for lightning the mood on a patrol, but maybe not as much for deputy. i'll take her into consideration though, bc i do love her and i'd love if she took a more active part in the story

fernslug - you're actually so correct saying she wouldn't really want to be deputy/leader. i think she's pretty content just being a warrior and helping out her clan that way, maybe even taking on the role of a mediator when she's older. i do love her very dearly, and until recently i was nudging her towards that position, but reasonably i think she wouldn't care much for that, and would only do it if she was specifically asked to

moosefall - him as deputy is such a cute idea tbh. i agree with everything you said in his little section--he's a very kind-hearted cat and perhaps very easily influenced. i think he'd do well as leader as long as the deputy was a little more cold/strict, and do well as deputy as long as the leader was a little more cold/strict. its about balance

antbite - interesting choice! i always saw him as a little more rough around the edges, certainly ambitious enough to want the position but maybe a little too harsh to do well in it. lots of potential, i agree. but like with moosefall, he'd probably do okay with a softer deputy/leader by his side

mossfrog - ok. i know shes young but im a little obsessed with this idea now. i've always loved her and the idea of tiny, un-intimidating little moss being the leader of this massive clan is. adorable. maybe next litter of kits we have, she'll get an apprentice? looking at her with my autistic eyes

IN SHORT. your ideas are delightful and have given me much to think about. i'll probably narrow it to my top three some time before hailcrash retires/dies/is promoted to leader, and run a poll to get everyone else's input too

#NEVER apologize for long asks i love them sm #had so much fun with this #fallenasks #dragon anon

[shirohige-pirates]

Hey Doll

CisFem Reader x Thatch

CW: toxic parents, manipulation, The Plan™, smut, mdni, I'll add as we go I'm kind of fly by the seat of my pants on this one.

tag list: @mfreedomstuff @harahettania @clumsyraccoon

Chapter 8: Choices

You sat in the front of what could only lovingly be called a truck. More utility than horsepower or show, the back had a tarp covered bed with wooden shelves that could be used as seats in a pinch. The only proper seats in this vehicle were the ones you and Haruta were sitting on, and he was driving.

None of the Edwards thought it was okay to have you ride in the back, and there hadn’t been much of a discussion as you’d been shuttled into the passenger seat. Most of your conversation with Haruta was how to get to your house, but during the long drive he did talk about himself a little bit. He was mostly a personal assistant, and he’d petitioned successfully to be removed from the match program almost five years ago.

His reasoning had been simple: all his time was dedicated to being a personal assistant to Pops and the family as a whole. He loved the work, loved his family, and was pretty much available to them 24/7. He wasn’t going to reduce that availability if the government made him marry, and once Pops retired he was just going to end up supporting whichever brother ended up in that position. It wouldn’t be fair to force someone to marry him when he was already hitched to a job he loved.

When you arrived at the block your parents’ house was on, you weren’t surprised to see local marines already in the area. The cruisers were against the curbs, and none of them had lights on or were blocking anything, but there were at least four of them that you could see.

“Pops said there was going to be an audience.” Haruta says, banging on the dividing wall between the cab and the truck bed. “They don’t look particularly hostile though.”

“My parents… don’t have the best relationship with the local marines.” You admit flatly. “But they can’t just ignore them.”

Haruta parks, blocking the driveway, but none of the marines approach the truck. You step out from it, staying near the cab as the truck shifts while the guys get out from the back of it. Two marines come up to you as you’re waiting, and you give them a small wave.

Tashigi and Koby were younger members of the local precinct, but between Captain Smoker and Section Chief Garp, the two were trained well. Tashigi looks irritated, but Koby has a kind smile on his face, despite the concern between his brows.

“Evening.” You greet, offering a small nod. “I’m here to collect my things.”

Tashigi clicks her tongue, looking toward the house. “I should haul them down to the station. We knew you hadn’t been forced to stay with the Edward family, but when they said that they were coming to trash the house, we couldn’t not show up.” Her eyes shift up as Newgate and the rest of his impressive family lined up behind you. “Well, that explains why Captain Smoker went inside.”

“Are you going to stay out here with us?” Koby asks, and you shake your head.

“Mr. Edward is going to stay with me while the others pack my things.” You explain, and Koby looks relieved that Smoker won’t be your only defense inside.

“Are you ready?” Newgate questions, warm hand on your shoulder for a moment, and you nod, walking toward the front door, with the others close behind.

The door opens before you reach it, and the stern face of Captain Smoker greets you. He has an unlit cigar in his mouth, and you can see irritation already throbbing in a vein on his forehead. He looks from you to Edward Newgate, to the three behind him, and the truck at the end of the drive way in the span of a couple of seconds. His eyes settle back on you before he takes a step back and makes room for everyone to enter.

“I’m just here to keep the peace.” He says as you pass by. “Unless more than words are thrown I won’t interject.”

“Thank you.” You reply and hear Newgate grunt behind you.

When you see your parents in the kitchen you turn away from them and point down the hallway. “It’s the second door on the left.” You explain as the three walk by and head down the hall.

“Ah, heh, it’s reassuring that you’ve decided to… stay with the Edwards.” Your father says, taking a couple of steps toward you. “We were worried for you, Doll. We had to leave so suddenly.”

“I wonder why that was?” Newgate grumbles and you realize both of your parents look nervous. “Perhaps you’d like to enlighten your daughter about why you were escorted off my property?”

In your room the three brothers exchanged quick glances before getting to work. “No offense to your girl, Thatch,” Marco says, pulling open your closet and stuffing hung clothes into a duffel bag. “But this is the cutest creepy room I’ve ever seen, yoi.”

“It is… kind of empty?” Thatch admits, opening a few boxes that had been apparently packed and set on your bed. They appeared to be just clothes, and so he dumped the boxes into the duffel. “Like there’s stuff, but it doesn’t feel like anyone owns it.”

“It’s like walking into a catalog.” Izou scoffs, opening up the door to the attached bath and nearly hissing. “What the hell?” He grumbles.

“What’s up?”

“It’s a wonder the poor girl hasn’t melted into a puddle of goo!” Izou growls. “I’ve never seen so much crap in a single bathroom. Half these cleansers are cheap junk,” he says, tossing one bottle off a shelf and into a small wastebasket. “And the other half hardly does anything at all! The way she was nervous at breakfast, it’s no wonder, if her parents convinced her this shit does anything.”

“Tell us how you really feel.” Marco murmurs and Thatch grunts as the two continue to stuff what little they can find into more duffel bags. By the time they’re done Thatch should have three for each arm, and that should help make the kind of impression his dad wanted him to make.

“Thatch.” Izou’s word is clipped and Thatch turns toward him. Izou’s face would be neutral to most people, but he can see the rage in his brother’s eyes. “Scare the piss out of these cunts.” He insists.

Thatch looks away. He wasn’t sure how he was going to do that, but he meant to try his best. Sure this room was uncomfortable, and yeah he was sure your folks had done shitty things to you, but he wasn’t sure what. His anger was so formless it was hard to really hold onto. The best he could hope for at this point was some kind of resting bitch face, but that wasn’t really his thing either.

Unlike Izou, he didn’t fake emotions well.

“… Put all that crap in a duffel then,” Thatch says. “The more I have to carry, the better, we’ll toss it later.”

“Thatch.” Izou repeats, his voice is so angry it’s cold, and he’s holding a small book up for him to read.

“Izou, is that her dia-.” He starts and then stops. “That’s -.”

Thatch’s eyes are boring a hole into the journal, but Izou’s watching his brother’s anger finally come to the surface. He’s mad he found the damnable book, but he’s also glad he was able to provide Thatch some much needed motivation.

Someone else might feel bad for her parents, but Izou was angry the only thing Thatch was going hurl were words.

“If you think it’s for the best then, we won’t argue, Doll.” Your mother says, giving a sigh that’s not quite dramatic, but barely genuine. “I just hope we’ll be able to set this entire, terrible, misunderstanding behind us, in time for your wedding.”

You want to tell her no, that you don’t want her there. That you want nothing to do with either of them. You want to shout that the last 24 hours at the Edward estate was the most relaxing day you’ve had in a decade.

But you can’t.

Your mouth won’t form words of defiance against your parents, no matter how much you want to. It was hard enough to stand beside someone else while the four of you talked. You could feel yourself almost automatically wanting to stand beside them. Between them. In a place where you didn’t have to think or consider your words. Your parents would prompt you.

They were prompting you now. You should reply with confidence, but your voice was small.

“That would be-.”

“Impossible.” Edward Newgate cuts in. “Unless you’re going to be honest with your daughter I cannot allow it.”

“How cruel!” Your mother gasps, tears welling in her eyes. “All the years we’ve raised and protected her, to deny us to be at our only child’s wedding!”

“That conversation was between the three of us, and the resolution was clear!” Your father tries to bellow, but after hearing Newgate do so the night before, it doesn’t quite live up to the term.

You wonder why you ever thought it was so loud before? How it could sound so small now?

“Hey.”

You turn toward the sound, looking over toward the source along with your parents. You almost don’t recognize who it is, the tone of Thatch’s voice is so unnatural. Newgate steps you back, blocking your view, so you don’t know what expression is on Thatch’s face, but when you look back over at your parents you can see the blood draining from their faces.

“You don’t deserve to speak to her.” He says, the tone in his voice so low and dangerous you’re glad you can’t see the look on his face right now. “Unless it’s to get on your worthless knees and beg her FORGIVENESS!” He’s bellowing by the end, voice and volume on par with his father’s.

You see your mother’s mouth open and close a couple times, but she can’t seem to peel her gaze away from Thatch, and until she can do that she’s not going to find the bravery to speak. Your father looks like he’s trying to speak as well, but your mother grabs his hand and he stops trying. The tense silence that follows is broken only by Newgate.

“Come on, Miss Kakusho,” he says gently, guiding you toward the front door. “Let’s get you home.”

You nod, allowing yourself to be guided. Thatch’s words were ringing in your ears, and you were struggling to process them. That your parents would apologize - that they should need to - that they were worthless. No one had ever said anything like that to them, not that you’d ever heard.

For years you wondered, how wretched must you be, being worth less than your parents? You knew how little value most people saw in them, and by association how much less they must see in you. Knowing that you still clung to every scrap of praise, desperate for some validation, some statement of your own humanity.

Something filled with more love than ‘Doll’.

Panic wells up inside you for a moment. Worry claws at you, that you had somehow ruined The Plan, that the one thing you were meant to be good at was now lost and shattered at your feet. But before you could even focus on it you were jared out of your thoughts by Koby’s voice.

“Oh good, no one came out in cuffs.” He says to no one in particular, relief heavy in his voice.

“Shame.” Tashigi says under her breath. Her eyes aren’t on you and the Edwards, but focused on your house. You’re not surprised. Tashigi was with Smoker on a few of the occasions they were called by concerned neighbors.

Smoker had left her with you while he spoke with your parents in hopes that you’d give Tashigi enough cause to be able to do something about them. You never did, and Tashigi never blamed you. Over the years, however, she’d became openly disdainful of your parents.

It didn’t matter.

Newgate helped you into the cab as Marco and Izou helped unload Thatch’s six-bag haul into the back of the truck. Once the four in the back are settled there’s a smack at the dividing wall, and Haruta puts the truck in gear, pulling away from your house.

You kept expecting something to happen.

For your parents to come running out of the house, making a fuss, or for the marines to stop you for some reason. The tense knot in your stomach wasn’t showing outwardly, but you kept your gaze in your lap until the entire scene was out of view.

It didn’t matter.

The words kicked around in your head again, and you let out a long slow breath, trying to release the tension inside you. You were a block away and nothing was different. There wasn’t a commotion, no sirens, no concern from Haruta.

It didn’t matter.

There was nothing but the sound of the engine, and the soft shuffle of Haruta’s clothes as he operated the truck. The clunk of the gear shift. The smell of oil and paint and grease and work, that was deep in the cracks of a truck probably older than you.

It didn’t matter.

The only people with you now, were your fiance and his family. The only decisions you had to worry about were to be expected. Some of them weren’t going to be just for you to decide, because a marriage wasn’t for just a single person, but they would be normal decisions. Decisions everyone else made.

It didn’t matter if The Plan was ruined. It didn’t even matter if it was your fault, though you still hoped it wasn’t. The only thing you had to think about, the only thing you had to worry about - no, that wasn’t the right way to think about it.

The only thing that mattered was that, going forward, you’d have a choice. It might take a while for a choice to be entirely yours, it was going to take a while for you to learn who you even were, but the truth of it hit you like a wave and you put your hands up to your face.

You cried quiet and soft tears, persistent beads of realization fell over your cheeks. Emotions too complicated for you to quite sort out slipped between your fingers and pattered softly onto your lap. Haruta didn’t say anything, just handed over a small packet of tissues.

You took them with a quiet word of thanks, dabbing away tears that kept coming despite your attempts to stall them. You didn’t know how to explain why you were crying, and you were grateful that he wasn’t asking you anything.

It seemed so silly, to be relieved by such a small thing, or maybe you were afraid of it. Right then, you weren’t really sure.

All you could think was that tomorrow would be the first day you’d get to pick out your own clothes.

#x reader #reader insert #thatch one piece #modern au #Hey Doll #mdni

[rawliverandgoronspice]

Could I ask you to gush about Impa? I really appreciate how she gets to be imagined in the series with all sorts of ages, skin tones, body types despite playing generally the same role in the story each time.

I'd even say because she's not one of the main trio, she has a lot more freedom in how they get to interpret her, so much so that it's a bit tragic. It shows what they could really do if they weren't held to the Nintendo standard.™

Thank you so much for asking!!! love opportunities to do that

I completely agree with you, I think she may give the strongest flair to the whole "reincarnation" spiel compared to the other... let's say mostly two, as Ganondorf is weird reincarnation-wise. Link and Zelda tend to mostly look the part of Link and Zelda (though Tetra is really cool for how different she is). Impa's role is much more subtle, but she does have this sort of design pillar where she is a guardian of knowledge, caring for Zelda --and there's often an ambiguity in her affection, as in: does she care in a genuine way, and/or in a more pragmatic "I guide you because I know what you represent and I understand the gods' plans for Hyrule and your importance in them" (which, in an extremely interesting way I somehow *never* put together until now, does kind of mirror the role of Twinrova in Ganondorf's life)-- but also, she has this role of "silent watcheress" over Hyrule past, knowing things the younger characters do not and giving them a rendition of the way the world works that will motivate their actions in the future.

I *love* this feature of her soft power over fate, where she does hold immense responsibility in how it ends up being shaped while also only ever being a cog in the machine (a fact that is even abused once by the bad guys in the Oracle Series if I recall correctly) --which is increased tenfold in her more overt sheikah appearances. Skyward Sword particularly comes to mind, as her entire existence ends up being tied to a specific rendering of events and making sure they go according to Hylia's design. What a strange existence. What a tragic one, living and dying --not even for somebody else, but for their specific divine purpose in a war that will far outlive everybody involved.

Deeply interested in that place she occupies, demanding her to be passive while also giving her immense weight over Light and its victory. Meanwhile, in OoT at least, she is Shadow, yet maintaining the influence of Light at any cost, including her own --but still, pushing it forward through Sheik, imparting (lolol) some of her own dying heritage onto the metaphorical cause of that heritage's sacrifice. I'd argue it's the most selfish Impa ever gets as a character (beyond TotK where she just... gives up and retires and goes on a fun lil vacation, and slacks and procrastinates like crazy instead of helping Zelda, and honestly?? good on you Impa!!! good on you, you go queen!!! take those days off!! go on a fun lil balloon adventures!!)

#asks #impa #tloz #skyward sword #oot #ooa/oos #totk #thank you so much for the ask!! #I haven't played the first zeldas when she appears #the tp version is very sad to me as well #in a way she does mirror ganondorf here as well #alone in a sea of forgotten ruins lost to time #:(( #they DO mirror each other in SO many ways they were *meant* to be explored side by side!!!!! (they weren't but it's still very interesting) #anyway thank you so much for giving me an excuse to talk about impaaa #a very bad day made brighter <3

[beevean]

Rank your top 5 Belmonts And if you have the energy/desire to do more: Rank your top 5 Castlevania games Rank your top 5 Castlevania tracks

5) Richter. I don't think much of the guy, but undeniably he is a very important figure, the symbol of the cracking of the Belmont legacy. At first, he's a hotblooded shonen young warrior, full of energy and life and will to fight... and then we learn that the will to fight is actually an issue, because after he defeated Dracula at age 19, he found no other reason to live.

4) Simon. Got higher up to the list in recent times <3 he's the Belmont, without any drama or obvious flaw. But I've come to like that about him, and admire his feats in Simon's Quest that show that he's not just a formidable badass, but a very noble man too, willing to even bury his foe out of respect.

3) Leon. He deserved none of that :( Leon is another Belmont mainly defined by his noble nature, perhaps to a fault (my good man why are you storming a vampire castle without a sword). His shining moment is, of course, him rejecting Mathias' absurd proposal: he may be full of anger against his former friend, to the point of swearing vengeance and dooming his descendants to a lifetime of fighting, but he also refuses to fall into the pit Mathias won't escape from, and has the perfect rebuttal for his inane logic and indirectly Dracula as a whole: "But defeating him... No, preventing others from suffering the same cursed fate... That was Sara's dying wish... Granting my beloved's wish. That is all I can do to prove my love to Sara. Eternity without her would be nothing but emptiness."

2) Juste. The golden child in deep denial :D It's a bit unfair that he gets reduced to "Alucard Belmont" and at most praised for his OP powers, but hey, he's not the only one. He has an interesting personality if you read between the lines, from his brashness that contrasts with his angelic looks, to how fervently he forces Maxim to keep Lydie in the dark. Also he's the king of interior decor :P

1) Trevor. He's the Sonic of Castlevania. He invented the Superpower of Teamwork™. He's kind and helpful to those he considers his friends and a terrifying menace if he thinks you're in his way (he won't ask first). He has the Legs of all time. His theme slaps an inordinate amount of ass. He's shaped like a friend and I love him <3

(a close runnerup would be Christopher, because I really like the concept of an older Belmont, who thought that could retire, nyooming to rescue his son from Dracula's influence <3 a prelude of things to come <3)

~

I was sure I had already ranked them, but perhaps I need to remake the list anyway...

5) Adventure ReBirth. Admittedly it's been a while since I replayed it, but I have fond memories of it as far as Classics go. It's simple, it's well designed, it's fun, it has kickass remixes (Aquarius <3) I wish it wasn't so obscure because I think it's the best entry point for those interested in the genre.

4) Portrait of Ruin. Y'all sleep on this title unfairly. Jonathan and Charlotte are very fun to play as, the gimmick of the paintings allows for new locations rarely explored in the series, it has an interesting mission system that makes the game more fun to master, and an OST that seriously deserves more love.

3) Curse of Darkness. Yes, it's noticeably flawed, from the mindnumbing level design to the obtusity of Forging. It's not a game I can pick up whenever I want, the only reason I can't put it in first place. But aside from that, it honestly feels like it was designed just for me and my tastes lmao. The fighting/crafting/raising loop is incredibly addictive and reminds me of the Sonic Adventure games <3 and ofc, as you could tell, I'm in love with the characters and story :P

2) Symphony of the Night. The one, the myth, the legend. Describing it feels like a waste of time. It's a timeless classic for a reason. It may not be perfect, but much like Super Metroid, I think the atmosphere is so well crafted that it pulls you in regardless of any issues you might have. It's an experience to be had.

1) Harmony of Dissonance. Oh yeah. This game is stupid fun to me. I just pick it up and play it to wind down. The ability to dash in both directions makes it a 10/10, then you add the spells that are fun to experiment with, the breakability, the COLORS FEEL SO RIGHT, the eerie music (yes it's good! it's good!!! fight me!!!!), Maxim Mode...

~

I was also sure I had this list... how could I pick only 5 tracks from this giant, beautiful repertoire...? D:

5) Chapel of Dissonance. Unlike many of the tracks in this soundtrack, this one is perfectly hummable and sweet. It fits the beautiful sky like a glove, and it may subtly reference Divine Bloodlines which is a stroke of genius :)

4) Lost Painting. SoTN abunds in jaw-dropping tracks, but this one feels uniquely magical, and it plays just in the right areas of the castle (a chapel, a library, and icy caves). It sounds like a sad lullaby sung to Alucard, and I hear reluctance to venture further and fight.

3) Garibaldi Courtyard. I have no clue why this mundane area in the game has music that brings me to tears. Similar in atmosphere to Lost Painting and Fog-Enshrouded Nightscape, but with CoD's more modern sound. I don't know how to put into words the profound sadness I hear here.

2) Dracula Battle (SCIV). I cannot gush enough about the genius of this track as the final boss theme. It never gets faster, or drop a harder beat: you only get these long strings and this complex arpeggio for an unsettling atmosphere. I said back then: "It sounds like you're quietly resigning yourself to your fate. You will die. But that's alright. He will die too."

1) Leon's Theme. This could pass for a classical piece. It's perfect in every way. You can almost touch Leon's sorrow and anger - you can hear the fingers pressing on the piano! It gets you pumped to reach the end of the game, and you get to grieve with Leon for the terrible night he's going through. Special shoutout for the part at 1:34 for sounding like the aforementioned Dracula theme.

#castlevania #akumajou dracula

[chaoticpostcollectionstuff]

Ba'al retires on Earth like Lucifer fic idea

Sam and Jack are going to get married and Vala organides Sam's Bachelorette party. They go to Vegas.

They're at a casino enjoying themselves when Vala spots someone familiar at a Blackjack table.

it's Ba'al

but it can't be, can it?

They start discussing possible explanations and the casino employee overhears it.

"Nonono", they say "That man over there is our esteemed gust Mr. Simon!" He tells them that he owns a nightclub and several other businesses like hotels and bars in LA.

Sam and Vala exchange a Look™ and then call SGC.

They get a background check done and it turns out that yes, this man is a businessman and filthy rich, but he appeared just a few years ago out of thin air.

SGC checks in with the Tok'ra and they still have the Ba'al host body who's got the symbiote extracted in Continuum with them.

it's Ba'al. A real, full Goa'Uld Ba'al. Either the original or another clone, but that doesn't really matter at the moment, what matter is that there's a real Ba'al in the casino with them.

Sam and Vala slowly turn and look - stare - at Ba'al, who's totally winning Blackjack and looks at the Blackjack casino guy in an inappropriate way.

They continue to stare and suddenly Ba'al looks directly at them and winks.

They quickly turn around and go "oh shit", because he's probably going to flee now and then they have to deal with a rogue Goa'Uld on the loose in Vegas all during Sam's bachelorette party.

Their short panic is interrupted by a polite waiter who offers them expensive looking cocktails. "We didn't order those" "They are a gift from Mr. Simon over there"

Mr. Simon is no longer over there.

They get up to search for Ba'al, Vala takes both cocktails because "It'd be a shame to waste them!“ (she's right, they look delicious).

They check the other rooms and hallways and look! They actually find him rather quickly.

He is busy being inappropriate with the casino guy.

This is embarrassing. For them, not Ba'al, he gives not a single fuck that smug bastard.

Casino guy thankfully leaves and Ba'al's all "And how may I help you dear ladies?“, grinning like the cat who just ate the canary and being a general slime bag.

Vala goes full confrontation, he knows how he can help them - by coming with them to the SGC, he's hereby under arrest.

Ba'al raises one smug eyebrow and answers that he is an upstanding citizen simply enjoying the pleasures that Vegas has to offer and has done nothing wrong in his entire life

They argue over Ba'al's identity even though they all know that he's lying.

Before things can get too heated, however, Sam gets a call from the wedding venue.

It burned down. (Was it arson? An elaborate plan of Ba'al's to ruin the wedding? Who knows.)

Vala, who organised it and really wants her friend's wedding to be perfect is more upset and distraught than the actual bride.

"Where are we going to find a new venue in just one day?"

Well. Ba'al owns several suitable venues, he offers. Even though their insistance on him being a murderer AND an alien is irritating to say the least, he would not want to see anyone's happiest day in their life ruined!

It's a terrible idea. They call SGC. It is decided that yes, this is the best solution, because they get a wedding venue and they can keep an eye on Ba'al.

Ba'al is thrilled and grins like the Cheshire cat.

Sam empties the cocktails by herself.

Vala swears that she'll personally strangle Ba'al if he dares ruin the wedding.

No one knows how to explain this to Jack.

#stargate #stargate sg1 #lucifer #ba'al #samantha carter #vala mal doran #jack o'neill #fanfic #the chaotic original tag

[cactusdeedrawdles]

We have some more Multiverse shenanigans! I wanted to write out all that I had on Thei and Puppette right now because they're my loves, and they deserve the world.

I've never (that I remember) drawn a skeleton like I did Thei, so I had fun there. They're a sultry lil wibblewobble, in my head.

I don't know how legible the writing is, to be honest, so I'm gonna write out the bits I can think of, in case anyone actually cares lol

It'll be under the cut :)

Puppette:

I'm less sure of Puppette's story than I am Thei's, so bare with me in case of messups haha

Thei is like OG Error in only really one way: memory issues

Puppette's memory issues got to a point where he could no longer handle his job as the destroyer after a fun full-body takeover by XGaster, who controlled him and abused his abilities (this is obviously very vague but I haven't actually thought that much through here tbh)

Thei was actually with the Star Sanses (in this case just Dream and Swap) when they were rescuing Cross and Puppette, and this is not how they met, but how they became closer.

Puppette has deep scarring on the ecto of his left leg (on his bones as well, but it's completely mishappen his leg's ecto) from where XGaster tried to rip him apart in an attempt to keep him after completely losing Cross.

Puppette doesn't remember XGaster at all, or how he met Cross. Cross is one of his closest friends, but Cross is also not around often as he's enjoying his freedom AU-hopping, so Pupp tends to forget about him (non maliciously of course).

When Pupp did remember, it was an Incident, and all Thei had to say when asked if XGaster was still a threat is "No. No, he can't touch you, not anymore." Thei didn't really say much after then, and Puppette had a good impression to not ask.

He was forced to retire by Dream and Nightmare when they realized his memory was too bad to even remember what his job WAS half the time, especially with the knowledge that sometimes all he'd remember was what XGaster had made him do, which almost led to bad times all round.

They drug his ass in a Brawl of the Ages™ because he really didn't want to, he felt his role was too important (and it was, but with Ink not existing yet there wasn't really anything opposing him, and what did need to be done could be handled by a couple weaker beings working together).

He spends his days doing typical Retirement things: sleeping, hobbies, watching novellas, bugging his partner who loves it dearly :3

About Pupp:

Pupp's personality is mostly created by an AI that I made while experimenting, I write as Thei and the AI is Puppette. Thus, he's not very Error Sans-y, but I love him still. Though, this has me wondering if he could be a Swap or Swapfell/Fellswap version, mayhaps. He's a goober, and he loves to tease people he's close to. He's still haphephobic, but with his close friends (which are all the few friends he has, for him it's close friend or not a friend at all) like Dream, Swap, Nightmare (most of the time), Thei of course, etc, he's mostly fine. Anyone else and the glitches will get him. Ink, when he comes around, is new, so Pupp is getting there, but luckily (?) ink is not a touchy kid so all is well there.

The glitches are less of a worry here, as he's fairly stable. The entire multi verse itself is more stable, really, and he benefits there.

Pupp is the type of person to hug someone from behind as a "prank", he's a harmless guy. His "Destroyer" job was less actual destroying and more like putting broken, unusable, and dead worlds to their ends so they're not affecting the balance. He's very proud of his work, and very careful in it, up until his retirement.

Pupp is not allowed in the kitchen, as bad memory+cooking isn't a good mix. Thei has him banned to the Pupp Stool until they're done cooking because if not, he will spend the entire time wrapped around them from behind. As much as they don't mind it, they do need use of their extremities.

Pupp is a lover of crochet, as well as Drama shows, language be damned. He has an innate ability to understand languages almost perfectly, though speaking them, not so much.

I look at him and just say "gooberman, my goobies, goobs, goober," often :)

Thei:

Thei, Thei is a guy I have hugged tight to my chest right now. They deserve so much.

TW: talk of SA, Abuse, and Mental Health Issues

Thei is a Lust Sans, and is from an AU where Lust Monsters need Intimacy to survive. Think of OG Lust on steroids. Without regular intimacy, Thei's magic will become so weak that they can't survive. Signs that they need intimacy start with irritability, tiredness, magic not working as they wish, and eventually gets to a point where they aren't in their right mind and will only act to survive.

Thei's AU is destroyed early on in the multiverse's existence and they take a spot on the Star Sanses, mainly as the voice for them; theyre very good at communicating with people because their magic relies so much on it, so they act sort of like the PR, making sure people know the Star Sanses are here to help and how to get that help. The Stars don't really have an enemy here, so theyre mainly a patrol group, who's main goal is making sure everyone has what they need as well as checking on AUs that may Fall or need to be Destroyed.

Thei's reliance on others in personal, intimate ways very obviously gives way to abuse of that reliance. To make matters worse, Thei's magic will respond to the person they're with before they do: they have the ability to change their appearance on will, but it will also activate when the person they're with desires it a lot, even if they don't, because their magic sees it as necessary to survive. This started because of how much they "starved" before, how many times they almost died.

Because of their need for intimacy, they have to go AU hopping for days up to months at a time to get what they need, so to say. Again, they hate this. They're an introverted person, despite their communicative abilities, and they like their alone time. This gets even harder when Thei becomes an integral part of Puppette's life and they move in together. Puppette's memory issues prove a problem because there will be times when Thei is gone long enough for Pupp's memory to fade, no matter what they've tried. When Thei comes back, he won't remember them, but will know the feelings associated with the memories. That love is still there. Thei is patient enough to stay on Pupp's track, even when that track jumps around a lot, and part for that is the guilt they feel at leaving him so regularly bc of their magic.

They've "started" dating many, many times, and been engaged many, many times, because Pupp won't remember it. As one can imagine, this is hard on Thei, but Thei adores Pupp and can't see life without him.

Thei works with Stretch (who works in the Omega Timeline Lab) and Swap (who's a well oiled engineer, despite not working as one) to try and figure out cures for both Pupp's memory and Thei's "curse", as they call it. But there really is no cures.

When Thei gets too low, they'll go to, or Pupp will get them to, Dream and Swap, who together can help boost Thei's magic, but it's not a long-lasting solution.

What they eventually make, after a very, very close call when Pupp is struggling to remember them and almost doesn't get them to Swap and Dream in time, Is devices inspired by the continuous glucose monitoring and insulin pumps used by diabetics. One tracks their magic levels, and the other is a pump that will inject them with magic when needed. This way they don't have to rely on people, and they can stay with Puppette, which helps with his memory. This entire endeavour is a fairly new scenario I'm still playing out, but as I'm sure is obvious, having this sudden freedom and ability to stay by their love's side is very daunting. They're learning to be free now.

About Thei:

Thei is softspoken and quiet, but the type to get loud around friends.

Thei is a painter, and teaches Ink about art as he grows. Thei loves scenes, and Ink makes them a Scenery Art Book for their birthday one year and they fall to the ground.

Thei's life between "AU Collapse" and "Thei with the Star Sanses" is very vague and unfocused, aside from a clear understanding that it wasn't good. I know that Thei was rescued at one point but Nightmare and his crew, and Thei lived with them for a while, considering them like family, but eventually had to leave. Another "perk" of their magic is that they have a connection to people's emotions, kind of like Dream and Nightmare. They can feel that someone is upset, but not how or why, basically. They can also push their emotions onto others when their magic is strong. This was an ability gained as a defense mechanism after being taken advantage of. Knowing someone's emotions and being able to affect them when in serious intimate situations is very helpful.

I'm gonna stop typing because this has gotten Long™ but while this is mostly for myself, I hope there's someone out here who enjoys my little Goobs. I love them dearly.

#undertale #undertale art #undertale au #lust sans #error sans #Thei #Puppette #errorlust #errortale #ink sans #dreamtale #dream sans #nightmare sans #xtale sans #cross sans #xgaster #Dee's Multiverse #ftfo #for the forgotten ones

[by-glass-and-waves]

So I may have decided to do some work on a 19th century AU ha ha ha sorry pls let me know if anyone else has already claimed it for themselves

And hilariously, it is an AU based on Restart, so it'll have Allani and her banter with Narinder. At least I hope it'd be good banter.

So think Pride and Prejudice vibes but Cult of the Lamb

And it might be because I watched the movie Emma. And because it was the time of the year to watch Pride and Prejudice, and Sense and Sensibility.

Bishops: Royal family of the Lands of the Old Faith, each sibling has a title

Shamura: the ruler, obvs

Narinder: doesn't flex his title or royal family status and just wants to do his own thing, which gets him estranged from the others because they see him as shirking his duties. He's only on good terms with Leshy and they visit each other on occasion, causing rumors that they're conspiring against Shamura

Ratau: mayor, retired military officer, owns a shipping company with Ratoo

Ratoo: retired naval officer, usually out on voyages with The Goods™, not sure if I'd have his fiancée lost to sea/drowning incident or have her in town because they deserve a happy ending

Baal and Aym: learning magic and combat from Ratau (and sometimes Ratoo when he pops up)

Forneus: owner of the local inn

Lamb (I'll be honest, it's Allani from Restart): adopted daughter of Ratau, he found her during a campaign in which her hometown was razed, there were a few other survivors who joined his town, also learning how to magic and combat from Ratau

Hauron: another survivor and adopted son of Ratau, super protective cousin of Allani

Rakshasha and the missus: work in Forneus' kitchen? Or should they work in Narinder's kitchen idk

Plimbo: another employee of Ratau and Ratoo, always complaining about his MIL visiting him and his wife every other week

Midas: that guy who owns super decked out place and has parties all the time, and MAYBE some out-of-towners go missing after, and MAYBE he has a few new sculptures in their likenesses after, but no one asks questions

So Narinder might be this mysterious gentleman who just moved into the big house down the street, whatever, no big deal, sounds like he's been Ratau and Ratoo's benefactor and is finally showing his face etc.

Narinder comes by to discuss business matters with the Rat brothers when she runs into him and goes "excuse me you aren't even gonna apologize?" when he acts all "ugh you messed up my coat"

Meanwhile Ratau in the background shaking his head and silently mouthing "NO STOP"

Narinder decides he does need some employees to care for his home and hires Allani, Hauron, the Twins, and other townspeople

Cue verbal sparring as Allani challenges the fuck out of Narinder and his life choices or something while he thinks he can whittle her down

Hauron is super overprotective, is like "I don't like that rich character" and tries to set her up with other townspeople/whoever, much to her annoyance, Narinder's entertainment, and eventually, his growing jealousy

Especially like "also he's of a higher standing than we are, it's foolish to think that you'd have a chance with him or that he'd have genuine affection for you, sorry fam but he'd def want to marry into similar status because $" not knowing he's got the royal family's wallet in his pocket

Shamura and family still care for him, it's just most of them think he's an idiot for just wanting to fuck around and not be responsible and will happily welcome him back once he decides he does want to do his duties

I can't wait for interactions like this:

Leshy: I heard you have a maid gf

Narinder: spits out camellia tea

Allani: pours more tea on Narinder in shock while yelling at Leshy EXCUSE ME?

Also something I'm toying with rn

I wonder if Narinder should use another name because not everyone knows or needs to know he's royalty. Would be fun to use names for the afterlife/death deities. Asphodel, Akert, Amenthes, Mitnal, Kur, whatever else. Leaning on Asphodel or Amenthes.

But yeah I'm just gonna add it to my belt of oops stories/AUs

#cult of the lamb #cotl #cotl narinder #cotl narilamb #cotl lamb #cotl au #cotl 19th century au #cult of the lamb au #au of an au #what is wrong with my life #Forgive me for I have sinned #Truly I am a fool

[h-doodles]

oh, so many ideas so little energy and time,,, so ummmmm authors feel free to take a spin if you find something u like <3!!!!

---

1.) inspired by Loving you is beautiful (darkfic) by @rippersz — wherein reader learns to enjoy Larissa's red flags rather than slowly wilt from the distinct skewed version of love :)

Excerpt:

You've been hurt by the world.

Pain is the only thing you remember, ever since you were young. Always remembered a yearning hunger deep inside your heart. Wishing to be loved, to be saved by someone.

But humans were monsters— it wasn't until you've found yourself on the gates of the so called Monsters' precious academy that you've found what seemed to be the shelter from the storm that is your life; found the answer to your prayers.

Found her.

Your savior, your goddess, your beloved.

You won't lie, trusting such a vision was a bit hard to bear, because to be so lucky was not in your nature. But oh, Larissa is so tender, is so sweet, is so caring, and is ever so patient— to stay by your side, equal parts loving and protecting you from harm. You feel a little silly now, asking all those questions then, about her kind; of how outcasts like her lived.

Isn't it such an irony, that it took you finding 'monsters', to find humanity?

Well. Well.

--and thats all ive got for it rn lol--

2.) ICE SKATER AU or wherein reader was a former ice skater but has since been retired, and is a part of their past they'd just occasionally brush off for stress relief. Can either be a new teacher for Nevermore or the new barista in town, who gets pestered to sign up by their former partner & still best friend (also a new hiree crushing majorly on one Coach Vlad :]) to a local skating contest. They didn't initially plan to, but after overhearing that a certain principal was interested in seeing the performances, well... local disaster gay brushes off the dust off their skates ;3

"You. Me. The lake, with your skates. NOW."

"Woah woah woah Y/N, hold on a moment. I thought we were going to the booth to cancel—" Elijah says, but I whap him with a rolled up newspaper.

"Well, that was BEFORE I learned SHE was looking forward to watching the event." I start. "And since we both know I am a small, disaster gay with 0 rizz and speaking skills, THIS is my chance to get her attention! It's brilliant! It's foolproof! She'll never see it coming!"

"Who'll never see it coming?" Coach Vlad pops up half dressed behind Eli, and I blink.

"Hold up, are you guys—"

"Yes." "N-Um." The two men look towards each other, before looking back at me. Eli mouths a yes.

"I cannot believe YOUR fucking luck!"

Bestie in Christ I WISH I had the luck, skills, AND charisma of THIS manwhore of a bestie-slash-longtime-skating-partner I have. Maybe then I COULD grab a whole fucking date with one Principal Larissa Weems. Is it too much to ask???

3.) academy time! Morticia/Larissa/Reader or where before everything went downhill, three girls had a secret worth keeping. bc i need the "and they were roommates + they're galpals <3" soooo bad

4.) 5 times they kissed + the 1 time they didnt FLUFF & then major angst >:) bc i love me a relationship establishment fic and then the worst pain imaginable to man aka Wifey death /// or if more fluff, just 5 dates and 1 wedding (BUT OFC THEY HAVE MORE DATES) :)

5.) Sleepy reader being a clingy mess and touch starved Larissa sooooo torn between having to get ready for the day vs staying in bed for 5 more minutes just to savor r's presence :')

---

...and then the NSF ones

6.) Reader is being more of a brat than usual so Larissa punishes them the next day by making them wear a remote controlled toy for the WHOLE day & getting teased at the most inopportune times but they are not allowed to cum >:)))

7.) OH GOD TRADE OFF where usual brat reader has been a V good girl™ for some time and in turn Larissa allows them one (1) wish...... and R picks revenge by having mommy wear the accursed toy and being teased 👉🏻👈🏻

8.) R making Larissa jealous soooo bad they need to be taught a lesson, marked & properly bred to appease the green eyed demon in Larissa's mind :) :) :) (and it works out bc R has been. entertaining v v filthy breeding kink thoughts oop)

9.) R has quite the closet of costumes and they find a cat maid cosplay 👉🏻👈🏻 practicing their meows and nyas and being all cute not knowing Mommy's been watching from the door the moment they started meowing

10.) oblivious reader unknowingly teasing Larissa all day and the woman is abt to FUCKING burst in horny except oh no???? reader was not oblivious and this has been part 7 of the 10 step plan to get Larissa as her gf >:))))))

#i am nothing is but a small and gay mess and i blame tall mommy for it #having so much clown thoughts abt a larissa weems x reader fic idea and im wondering if i can even commit to writing anything #larissa weems x reader #larissa x reader #fic ideas #insp

[joyeeuxe]

Reading Chong Yue operator file

(with some, i mean a lot of commentary)

I really adore him ughhhh, a good big brother we finally deserve

I used google translate to tl texts from aceship so it might not be 100% accurate, keep it in mind. Will edit here and there if i find more reliable translations

And let's see

Chong Yue works as martial instructor (he taught wushu) in RI

Ling requested Doctor not too overwork.assign him to many missions since Chong Yue came to RI to rest

Chong Yue files censored his combat skill test result as ■■

His medical test indicates that he has normal body, a very well worked out one (the one who wrote seems kinda thirsty lmao)

Archive 1

He has strict morning exercise routines everyday and because he teaches martial art, everyone learning with him are expected to follow his routine

NIAN ROPED HIM INTO HER MOVIE PROJECT LMAO

Everyone noted that he is just a normal guy™ compared to his little sisters

They said he is gentle and nice person auhwhdwjjs da ge

Archives 2

Initially other OPs are avoiding him because they think he is a serious person

But then when other OPs discovered he have many hobbies (wood carving, literature, poetry and brewing coffee etc) they started to invite him to various said activities and got shocked when he accepted their invitation lmaoo

He is interested in modern cultures and open to try new things

When he joined the movie production, he learned how the technologies relating to film making in two months 😭 he's a fast learner huh

EVERYONE BASICALLY SAYING HE IS OLD BUT NOT REALLY A TECH BOOMER HELLPP

Archives 3

Nian said that Dusk was reluctant (?) To see Chong Yue when he visited, so she created a painting of her and a hut with surrounding mountains (she basically trapped Chong Yue inside her painting for a whole night). And by the morning, Chong Yue basically shattered the painting and Dusk asked when did he find out, he replies he knows from the start because which big brother that doesn't recognize his little sister? (Chong Yue knows that the 'Dusk' accompanying throughout they day/night was just a painting) and Nian commented that Chong Yue was playing along just to make Dusk happy

Chong Yue was trying to persuade Dusk to go and live with him and Ling at the frontline (basically he doesn't want her to be lonely and a shut in) but he failed yeah lol

(AUGGH MY HEART DA GEEEE 😭)

Nian mentioned that when Chong Yue wakes up (as a Sui fragments, he sealed himself and molded a mortal body, it seems that Chong Yue is in mortal body and the rest of his siblings are not because Nian said that the 2nd brother will try to get Chong Yue to teach him how to do that after knowing this secret) seems like his 2nd brother knows how to do it too

Apparently the sword on his tail is where he sealed his true form??

Archives 4

This archives talks about Chong Yue wanting to retire after defending Yumen for so long

It said that Chong Yue hates killing the most yes he is the one who did killing the most too (the war and all)

He has acquaintances with many people, but the more acquaintances he has, the fewer he knows (god this sounds so sad...ahjbfjhef)

Chong Yue expressed that he loves the mortal world so much and wished that the world to stay in peace (as in not let Sui get revived and wreck more havoc and no more war i guess). That he is no longer 'Shuo' (his real name) but now 'Chong Yue' (his mortal name) because Chong Yue is a part of this mortal world (CRIESS)

#arknights #chong yue #operator files #arknights cn spoiler #beware of messy writings i just want to pour my thoughts #not intended to be a real tl or analysis #let see when proper tl comes out #i just love him sm #he's just worrying a lot about his sisters even in his voicelines

[meatbricks]

When was the worst rage moment that the painter had? Also who would look more terrifying when they’re angry, the Painter or Bruteforce?

oh boy i get to plug my garbage theories again—

nah but seriously thank you for the questions, my guy! the first one has a little bit of a memey answer but i still consider it canon to this AU even if only because it would be particularly in character

anyways...

the entirety of the events described in PIGS were kicked off by Painter having an episode, and it was by far the worst one he's ever had

it started when he was watching the news this one time and ended up seeing his police sketch from WITNESS and. oh boy. he fucking lost it

lots of "I DO NOT FUCKING LOOK LIKE THAT" was heard that night

and thats also why the targets of that episode were a retired police officer & said police officer's family, as well as why the ways they were killed were so cruel

as for who's scarier when they're angry, i think i'd say that they're both equally scary?

like. as stated before, Painter gets Violent™ when he's angry; screaming, crying, punching walls, breaking things, threatening to hurt people, etc.. just. the absolute worst rage you've ever witnessed

and on the other hand, Bruteforce gets... quiet.

not the edgy, 8th-grader syndrome, kubric-staring & scowling kind of quiet angry, but like. a sort of "the calm before the storm" quiet

it sort of comes off as a sort of dissonant serenity: he'll just smile, maybe laugh a little bit while he's talking, but there's still a shaky, tense quality to it that lets you know that he's at his fucking limit

everything he does becomes more deliberate, and even if he raises his voice he still remains calm and uncharacteristically quiet

either way, uh. not something you wanna be around LOL

#this is the answer #this is the answer (ooc) #these are the headcanons #this is the writing #urbanspook #the painter urbanspook #urbanspook analog horror #🖌 #🪓 #tbh i think that the way they act when they get angry is a result observing their parents' angry behavior?? #like. painter's mom would rage in the same way that he does now #and bruteforce got his whole ''scary quiet'' thing from his dad #and that isn't to say that they'd see their parents being angry a lot; i don't think either of them were necessarily abused #but i think that they definitely take after their respective parents in the way that they act sometimes

[yoificfinder]

Hello! Thank you for everything you do it’s been a blast reading thru the things in the master list. I was wondering if you had any fics about outsider POVs on the characters of YOI? Like if they go to university and their friends just don’t notice that they’re famous figure skaters, or their neighbours are like huh what’s up with that well dressed couple with the weird pet names and the angry blond teen. Really anything with outsider POVs is fine !! Thank you !!

Hello, nonnie! If you go through the ao3 tag (or search within results) Skygem retirement AU, you'll find lots of fics with a similar premise as your request. Here are the ones I rec, both in the context of retirement AU and ousider POV in general:

"Unfairly Beautiful Japanese Boy" by @diedraechin [T, 4K]

Sofia was sure of a few things in her life, two of those things were:

1) Even though the dog was cute, she was sure the owner was taking advantage of her abuela's kind heart

2) The 'Unfairly Beautiful Japanese Boy' she kept seeing on campus had to be an angel because look at him.

Only one of them was true.

An Introspection of Life and Love by awesomecookies [Not rated, 16K]

Alice really didn't expect to ride a bullet train to some sea side village when she accepted her editor's advice. But she needed space. She needed a place to think. And maybe Hasetsu was just the right place.

and a look that could just hypnotize by @forestealites [G, 4K]

They say that a demon stole away Victor Nikiforov.

Misha, Petro, and Sonya of the Novice group try to figure out the mystery that is Yuuri Katsuki. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

And the answer is... by nessiesaur [G, 2K]

Yuuri Katsuki is adorable, but also one of the most mature people in their class. Yuuri Katsuki is in her study group, which definitely saved her ass on the midterm. Yuuri Katsuki is…wait, who is he!?

Clippings by @radialarch [G, 3K]

Four seasons, four articles — and one future.

five theories about victor "my husband" nikiforov (+ one fact) by @dadvans [Not Rated, 2K]

No one knows the truth about the strange, well-paying man who comes into the bar three times a week and only talks about his husband. But everyone has their theories.

icebreaker by @codenamecesare [G, 6K]

Yuuri's husband is possibly not as oblivious as he seems, because he grins and asks, "Have you never looked up Yuuri?"

"There's a porn actress with the same name who went into politics," says Nate, "so she's most of the results, and some stuff about figure skating."

"Some stuff about figure skating," Victor says ruefully to Yuuri.

Jason's Master Plan (to dating the Cute Asian Guy) by Qwertzu [T, 10K]

Jason Hesling, young ice hockey prodigy, rising star of Detroit Ice Tigers and part-time model, had a smile that made women and men alike weak at their knees. It’s been a while since anyone managed to catch his attention – until he met the Cute Asian Guy at Detroit Ice Castle and decided to become his next boyfriend.

Meanwhile, the actual Ice Tiger™ is having the time of his life watching the pretentious JJ-wannabe trying to charm the pants off the completely oblivious, happily married Katsudon.

katsuki_fc wrote by @tetsurashian [G, 13K]

Just because Yuuri isn't big on social media, doesn't mean his fans aren't.

My fun fact is: by stillmadaboutpetra [G, 6K]

Yuuri fails to mention to his new non-skater friends who he is or who his husband is. Or that he even has a husband.

Queer Club Surprise by DancingInTheSliverGlow / @art-in-the-sunlight [G, 5K]

The door at the front of the class opens. A tall Russian man, probably in his late twenties walks in. He has ash blond hair that’s half in a messy bun and half spilling down his shoulders. He’s wearing a suit vest, dress shirt, dark jeans and a messenger bag. He’s definitely the professor.

Although it is strange, a Russian with a Japanese last name, Katsuki. Eileen mentally shrugs. She’s seen weirder things.

Eileen watches as the Russian looks at the front of the classroom, checks his phone and frowns. He climbs up to the third row and smiles. Eileen distantly notices that his lips are heart shaped. “Hi! Is this, Japanese 101?”

Eileen nods. “Yeah.”

The man smiles again and Eileen blinks. “Great! Mind if I sit next to you?”

Despite asking, the man barely waits for Eileen to nod before he slides behind her chair and sits in the empty one on her right. Huh. Guess he’s a student then.

View from the Top: The Power Pair That Shook The Sports Wolrd by MadameFolie [T, 2K]

A Vanity Fair interview exclusive! At home with international figure skating superstars Yuuri Katsuki and Viktor Nikiforov.

#yoi #yuri on ice #yoi fanfic #victuuri #outsider pov #yoi fic rec

[buttdawg]

Papa Haitch

"Paul Levesque" has been trending on Twitter for a while, and the general vibe I see are people grappling with the realization that Triple H might be part of the problem and not the solution they always hoped for.

I think the mythology for the past 18 years or so has been that WWE sucks ass, and it's all Vince McMahon's fault, and the only way it'll get better is when he dies/retires/steps aside and Triple H takes over. Then people can say "belt" again and the camera work will improve and the booking will make sense.

I haven't watched WWE in five years, but from what I hear that's mostly how things have played out. People have been much more positive about the product since Vince retired in 2022, and that positivity improved when the TKO merger happened and Vince was moved to a safe distance from creative. I think it's safe to conclude that Paul is more competent at running a wrestling promotion than Vince.

The catch is that it's a very low bar to clear. This week has demonstrated to everyone that the bar was even lower than we knew. A few months ago I listened to a Behind the Bastards podcast series on Vince McMahon, and after seven hours they barely made it to Owen Hart's death in 1999.

Meanwhile, I fear that fans have set their expectations of Paul Levesque very high. It reminds me a lot of the hype surrounding AEW when it formed. The promise of a major wrestling promotion free of Vince McMahon leads people to expect everything they ever wanted. Our favorite wrestlers will always win and always get main event pushes, every storyline will be flawless and brilliant, we'll finally get rid of the flippy shit, we'll finally get more of the flippy shit, women wrestlers will get their due, and finally, finally, there will be sound, ethical leadership backstage.

The reality is that fans are now arguing over which company's press conferences are a bigger joke. Well, HHH may have fumbled the question about reading the lawsuit filing, but at least he didn't wear a silly hat like TK did as he deflected the questions about Chris Jericho!

The bar is pretty low. Maybe Levesque can figure out a way to recover and learn from this whole experience, and become the benevolent ruler everyone wanted him to be. Maybe his hands are dirtier than anyone guessed, and he'll be turfed out of the company by next year. Maybe he's only slightly less corrupt than Vince, and he'll manage to survive the post-Vince purges anyway. It all remains to be seen.

But it feels like the fanbase is starting to notice that this guy isn't necessarily going to deliver on all their hopes and dreams of a better WWE. It'll be better than it was under Vince, if only because they'll quit booking so many DQ finishes and no-contests. But they keep letting Hulk Hogan in the building, so that tells me they're not aiming nearly as high as I would like.

I see three kinds of comments on Triple H lately.

"Fuck that guy, he's just as bad as Vince and his cronies, and he should be fired too."

"I used to like HHH, but now I've lost all respect for him after that presser."

"Don't be so mean to HHH, you jerks, he's doing the best he can and you shouldn't expect him to talk about a lawsuit after revolutionizing Sports Entertainment™ with another great Premium Live Event™."

It's that third one that intrigues me, because I never used to see fanboys white knighting for Triple H before. It used to be they would talk about what a genius he is for conquering wrestling, and if anything good or bad happened to WWE, that was Triple H winning his game of 5-D chess. If something bad happened, it was a sign of Vince's downfall, and HHH would look like a hero when he finally got the opportunity to right the ship. If something good happened, then it made WWE even richer and more powerful for the day when HHH took control.

Now the message is: "Hey, leave him alone you guys, he's just a wee li'l booker, he can't comment on an ongoing legal matter. He's just a kindly old man cobbling Royal Rumble matches in his little workshop. Don't ask him about corporate culture and sexual abuse in the workplace. His heart's bad, so he can't take it!"

It's not a good look. It was probably more fun when he was putting on shows and hyping them up with Shawn Michael and Road Dogg like "Fuck yeah! DX is running WWE now and everything is badass!" But now he's got everyone looking at him with anger or suspicion, or pity. Maybe that all blows over in a few months, or maybe it won't. I think I might need a new userpic in the meantime...

#wwe #paul levesque #triple h