#Julian: I gave him mine and didn’t realize until he had already finished it! I didn’t mean to! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lilyharvord · 3 years

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Do you in red queen univeres is like harry potter. The silvers are like the pureblood family. Mare is a newblood like being a muggles born witch and Julian is more like Dumbledor or the Weasley what do you think?

I'm gonna say the universe itself does seem to lend itself to those categories! Or sub-catagories! It also very easily lends itself to a Hogwarts AU! PREPARE FOR AN AU UNDER THE READ MORE

I mean, Mare seeing her favorite big brother Shade receive a super pretty envelope from this strange school saying he is a wizard and is being offered a position in that school? Going to Diagon Alley with her family and Shade picking out a owl, and old faded robes cause he family really can't afford anything else. Then her hugging him tightly as he has one foot on this strange train and one foot on the strange platform that they had to run through a brick wall to get to?! Holding his hand through the window and running along side the train as he promises to write her every week before she runs out of platform and has to stop as the train pulls away and he is waving and smiling wildly at her. Her little hand slowly falling from her wave to be by her side and she wishes desperately to be on that train with him? ONLY TO RECEIVE HER VERY OWN PRETTY LETTER THE NEXT SUMMER? She gets to do the whole process! And she has all these fantasies about what it will be like based on the letters Shade sent her all last year. She wants an owl, or a salamander, or something like that. And she want to play the strange quidditch game he mentions. She wants to run up and down staircases that change. When she gets on the train with him, she practically pulling out of her mom's arms, and almost forgets to hug a very upset Gisa goodbye.

On the train, Shade tells her all the details, introduces her to his friends: ketha (a second year like him), Ada (a sixth year), and Farley (a second year that Mare is incredibly intimidated by until she sees Shade heart eyeing her every two seconds).

They tell her about the houses. Shade is more than proud to be sorted into Hufflepuff even though Farley teases him about it and Ada only smiles at the whole thing. But they all get quiet about Slytherin. It's not a house you want to be in, Shade says quietly. Mare doesn't quite understand. Cunning? what's so bad about being that? Smart and quick witted? Hell, there's nothing wrong with it.

Then she meets them. The Slytherins. And she sees why she shouldn't be a part of that House. But then she meets the strange, dark haired, blue eyed boy at the back of the group with her, who tries to sit in a boat alone until Mare clambers in behind him, cursing the fact that her socks got wet and they're going to be gross and her shoes will squelch while she walks. He seems a little uncomfortable around her big personality until she introduces herself, and he smiles and shakes her hand, quietly introducing himself as Maven. Nothing more. Mare doesn't mind, loads of people don't give their last names.

Then she's in the Great Hall, underneath the Sorting Hat, Shade smiling at her like a fiend from the Hufflepuff table while Maven is already sitting at the Slytherin one, slouched and looking just a bit upset. (It's not what you think y'all. it's because CAL's a Gryfindor, and their dad was too and he still wants to get his fathers love, and he pretty much just CEMENTED the fact that he won't get it now.) Mare sees him, and the Sorting Hat huffs and says, making friends already? Mare frowns and then thinks back it: he's lonely. And the hat laughs before saying: loyal then, hufflepuff might do you well. She makes a face and it laughs once again when she thinks: I can do better than that. And it seems to nod in understanding before standing upright and announcing SLYTHERIN. Maven sits up taller as Mare leaps down from the stool and runs to him with a big, shit eating grin on her face. Shade goes a little pale in the face but smiles at her nonetheless. It's his baby sister, and if she's happy, he is too.

She's very happy. Slytherin isn't all that bad. Maven's her friend and he's a very good one. He's smart as a tack, and knows all these neat tricks to get through work. But its when they go out to fly on the brooms where they differ finally. Maven is... not a fan of being off the ground. Mare... she could live up there. She tries to get him interested but he jut won't have it, preferring to bury his nose in books and study. (Mare wonders why he wasn't sorted into Ravenclaw like Ada, but she shrugs it off).

It's one day when they're all out walking and that girl Evangeline starts teasing some kid and throws his whatever in the air that things finally get interesting for Mare. In a very impressive showing of skill, she catches this tiny object while flying. IMMEDIATELY, the captain of the Slytherin team wants her as his Seeker. Its UNHEARD OF everyone argues. NO FIRST YEARS allowed! But it's vetoed, and Mare is allowed to play. Shade is more than proud, puffing out his chest, and forcing her to walk around with him so he can introduce her to his class and everyone as the youngest Seeker in years.

It's after she is sneaking out of the Gryffindor tower one night, having stayed to talk with Shade and Farley who is finally losing some of her Ice Queen exterior and even cracked a smile at one of Mare's jokes, that she almost gets in trouble. She is sprinting down the stairs of the tower when she runs smack into someone so they both end up tumbling down the stairs and hitting the back of the Fat Lady's portrait when they land. She stumbles over apologies, trying to grab her things in the dark (and pocketing one or two of his by accident), when she looks up. She's seen him before, she know she has, but can't remember from where. Plus, it's a little dark and she can't see him all that clearly. He's sitting there, tie undone, and shirt all messed up from falling, and rubbing the back of his head where it hit the back of the portrait when he looks at her. HE knows her. This the girl who is the youngest Seeker in years! They blink at each other, and she tries to take off, but he grabs her wrist, keeping ahold of her as he says: Thief! when he realizes she grabbed a few of his things. She looks down at the mess of things in her arms, and then frowns at him before saying, No! These are my things! he pulls out his wand and book from her hands and she's like: okay, well, those aren't mine, but whatever. And he smiles at her as he stands and she's suddenly craning her neck to look up at him, and LORD ABOVE what did he eat as a child?! She squints up at him, still trying to place him when he shifts his things to his other arm and holds out a hand for her to shake. She looks at it, and then takes it slowly. His grip is so warm and comforting, but not sweaty like some of the other boys her age. He shakes her hand and introduces himself as Cal, and THEN Mare knows who he is. This is Maven's brother. The older one, the perfect spitting image of his father who is the "Perfect Son." Maven always sneers just slightly when he says that, and now that she has met this Cal, she knows Maven is right. Turning up her nose at him, she spins on her heel and leaves, completely uninterested.

Okay she lied, she was a little more interested than she let on. She sees him EVERYWHERE after that. He raises his brows at her in the Great Hall, and even smiled and said good morning Mare when she walked by with Maven to Charms one day. After that day, Maven gets really sullen, and tells her that she shouldn't talk to him, that he's trouble. He's a third year, in line to be Prefect and Headboy at some point. She doesn't want to get mixed up with wet blanket like that. She agrees, but something about him, his eyes, the gentle smile, and way he'd looked at her the first time he saw her makes her heart do a little jig every time she thinks about him.

Before she knows it, its the first Quidditch match, and she's set to play. She steps out in her beautiful green and black uniform, and while she's in the tunnel adjusting the straps on her wrist guard with her teeth, someone laughs behind her and says: there is a better way to do that. She looks up, the laces half in her mouth, and a tiny bit of drool running down her chin to see Cal leaning against his broom. Of course he plays Quidditch, she thinks with a scowl. What perfect son wouldn't? He takes her wrist though and ties the guard gently, pulling the laces perfectly through the loops. Maven tried to help her with it this morning but gave up when he couldn't do it. Her face burns with embarrassment but he doesn't notice, or at least, he pretends not to notice. When he finished both wrist guards, he shoulders his broom and with a wink says, "eyes up and head up, dont want to take a Blunger to face on your first day." He strolls away after that, and Mare stands there, watching his shoulders as he leaves. How does a thirteen year old boy manage to look like that?! Shaking it off she steps on the pitch but... that's all she remembers. She takes a nasty blunger to side of the head and falls to the pitch floor. When she wakes up, the entire Slytherin team is around her and so is half the Gryfinddor team, Farley is grimacing as she takes in the situation, and Cal is leaning over her, shielding her from the son. She frowns up at him before saying, "you didn't say they moved that fast." He snorts to hide a laugh as the medics take her off the pitch. Good news? She learns later in the Infirmary, they won! When she went down, Cal, the Keeper moved as if to go to her and they were able to put the Quaffle in to get the final point! Her captain claps her on the back, and she tries not to puke when the movement jars her head.

The year ends uneventfully, and she waves goodbye to Maven as she disembarks and he leaves with Cal. A woman with matching icy blue eyes and stark, ash blonde hair frowns at her as Maven smiles and waves his own goodbye. She pointedly ignores Cal's title wave goodbye.

The next year is much of the same but there is a... current in the air, a charge that wasn't there before. Something is happening, something dark in the world. Shade and Farley go to Hogsmead and talk about it, but Mare can't go yet. She sits in a hidden alcove of the Astronomy tower, watching the world outside with her books open before her. Maven is quieter this year, but there is a strange new confidence and glint in his eye. It worries her. He is not the boy she waved goodbye to at the beginning of the summer.

One day while studying, she hears footsteps and looks up to see Cal pausing along side her. Her stomach flip flops when she sees him. The summer did wonders for him. Somehow, he is more attractive. She didn't even realize that was possible. And she REFUSED to admit that she thought about him a few times... well more than a few times... over the break. He smiles at her and before she knows it, she's leaning toward him to talk. She asks why he's not at Hogsmead and he grimaces before saying he is struggling with Diviniation and has to take an extra class on it every week. She laughs, and the smile he gives her when she does laugh turns her stomach to molten lava. He helps her out of the windowsill and they walk to the Great Hall together. Maven intercepts them before then, his eyes narrowing and darkening when Cal waves goodbye and heads on his way. Mare nudges Maven with her shoulder and teases him saying: are you worried I might like him more than you? Maven glowers at her, and she softens before taking his hand and promising him that Cal is "a complete and utter moron, who she could never like." It seems to relax him, but not completely. Again, Mare worries. He was never concerned about Cal or any of this before.

The year works that way though. She slowly get closer to Cal. They have this strange unspoken agreement to meet at HER windowsill once a week and then walk along the ground by the lake. One day, in the winter, she forgets a thick enough coat, and is shivering in her sweater until he shrugs off his cloak and drapes it around her shoulders. She blinks in surprise, before smiling and thanking him. It's far too big on her and drags on the ground a bit, but its warm and it smells like him. Which she is terrified to realize she kind of likes.

She starts spending time in the Gryffindor tower too, getting closer with Shade's friends, and sometimes, Cal is there too. He's not really a staple (he and Farley don't really get along, something about her calling him a Pure Blooded Hypocrite), but Mare finds she likes when he is around.

That summer is terrible. Maven doesn't write her as much as he promised. And the world is getting Dark™️. There are strange disappearances on the TV. Things are getting weird. Shade gets secret letters from Farley that he hides from her. When they go back to Hogwarts, things are... different. There are guards, there weren't Guards before. Maven looks more gaunt and haunted. Even Cal doesn't seem as cheery anymore. They're walks around the lake go from once to twice to three times a week. He tells her about his side of the Wizarding World, and she learns about a group that is known as the Death Eaters (who serve a mysterious Dark One that wants to eliminate the muggle population and the mud bloods). Mare frowns when he says that word. He says it quietly, like its something bad. She's not sure why, it's a word. When she asks Farley about it, her friend's face hardens and she tells her it's a nasty term that Pure Bloods use to describe the people like them. The ones who come from non magic families.

She finds solace in Quidditch, she even goes out when Cal offers to show her a few tricks, and that time... it is strangely magical. She finally gets to go to Hogsmead, and spend time with Shade and Farley there. They have a new little group, a taller fifth year named Tristan is added, Ada is with them, Ketha, and a couple of others. Shade tells her to go off and find something to do one time and she ends up spying on them. When she does, she overhears them talking about the Dark One, that they are back and that is the reason so many Muggles are dying and disappearing strangely. That Hogwarts might not be safe anymore. She confronts Cal about it one day, and he stops dead in the snow, spins on her and says never to talk about it. That the Dark One is dead, has been dead for year and that she should never mention them. She is taken aback, he's never seemed so concerned to desperate before. So she drops it. But things get worse over christmas break.

When she returns, Maven is almost cold with her. She tries to tease him like she used to, but he just isn't having it. She clings tighter to him, worried that things are not going well at home. She knows his mother isn't great, knows his father is an asshole. She can't understand how two people like that managed to make someone like Maven, and someone like Cal. But she tries her best to be a friend for Maven. She can't help but get closer with Cal. Something about him draws her in, and keeps her.

One day at Hogsmead, she runs into him (literally, again). She slips on the ice and he catches her, his hands grabbing her hips and pulling her close so she has to grab the front of his coat and cloak to keep herself upright too. They look at each other for a long time, confused and full of butterflies before she spots Maven at the other end of the bridge. She was supposed to meet him at the sweet shop but was running late. His eyes narrow ever so slightly at what he sees, and Mare pulls away from Cal glaring at him and adjusting her hair when he blinks in confusion. She turns on her heel and leaves without a word, taking Maven's hand in her own as she passes him and dragging him along.

That summer, something changes fundamentally in the world. The world actually gets even Darker. Shade gets more worried, and Farley starts showing up at thier house. Mare know they are seeing each other. But she keeps it to herself. When they go back to Hogwarts... there are Guards on the train. She walks down the hallway and runs into Cal on his way to his compartment. The train rocks as she is trying to pass him and she ends up in his arms again. She's fifteen, and he's seventeen, old for a sixth year. But in his Prefect uniform, he looks quiet attractive, and somehow he got MORE attractive over the summer. The flutters that had once been nothing but tummy flutters when she was elven/twelve are now full blown butterflies in her stomach. She would never admit it, but she had a dream about him over the summer. About his hands on her hips and the stone wall of the Gryffindor common room rubbing against her back as she pinned her to it. She doesn't pull herself out of his arms right now though, there is something comforting about being in his embrace right now, when the world seems to slowly falling apart around them. He lets her go, a falsh of something in his eyes before he smiles at her and says, safe travels.

When they get to Hogwarts, she knows there is something wrong with Maven. He looks like a corpse, his eyes are dark and his features are sharper than usual. She tries to get him to smile for her, but he can't seem to muster much. So one day, out of desperation, she kisses him. He melts finally, and she melts with him, burning like Icarus when he got to close to the sun. They become... a thing for lack of a better term. He clings tightly to her, pulls her away from Farley and Shade and her friends, pointedly makes sure she doesn't spend time with Cal to the point where he actually seeks her out one day, and Maven jeers at him until he leaves. It scares her, he was never hostile, never a person like this. When she talks to him about it, he raves about things she doesn't understand. An In fact, he seems almost angry with her. She can't understand, she tries to get it out of him halfway through the fall, and he turns around and calls her a nasty Mudblood, jeering at her about the fact that is lucky he even considers her a friend. It breaks her heart, shatters it into a thousand pieces. She didn't kiss him just because it might make him feel better. She kissed him because she wanted to, because she thought it felt right (she also did it because a secret part of her hoped that kissing him would make the dreams about Cal stop.)

She stops hanging around him, the other kids like him and the other Slytherins embrace him instead, folding him into their group, while she starts to gravitate to Shade and Farley again.

they go home for Christmas, and the world tilts completely on its access. There is horrible accident that kills a number of families, and Shade immediately packs a backpack that night to go see Farley. Mare forces him to take her with him. When they get to Farley's, everyone is there, all the people Shade has been friends with. She learns they are forming a group, the Scarlet Guard, to defend themselves. The Dark One is coming back, and they will be ready.

When they return in the spring, the teacher for Defense Against the Dark Arts does not prepare them right. Mare feels like a child being handed a pair of children scissors to solve a grown up problem. She talks to Shade about it, and the group agrees. They need training. It's then that Mare does what cements her fate with Maven. She seeks out Cal. He is not looking too great either, there is something haunting his face and when she finally walks up to him one morning on the lawn near the lake, he looks at her suspiciously. She doesn't know why but she ends up curled against his side, sobbing. He's taken aback at first, and then soften, wrapping an arm around her while she tells him everything. With a tight jaw, and a nod, he agrees to help them training.

They form a secret group, and they start training. It's then that Mare starts to realize that perhaps she likes Cal more than she lets on. he's a good teacher, a very good one, and whenever he holds her hand and guides her wrist through a complex spell movement, she feels her face heat up. He's a sixth year, seventeen and on the cusp of greatness it seems. His OWLs were outstanding, he is set on the path she knows he wants. They train together privately. On a nondescript day like any other, she stays after to talk to him, and when she does, he kisses her. It turns her into a pool of liquid mercury, and when he breaks it off and gently caresses her cheek with his thumb she knows she is doomed.

They leave for the summer, and she writes him daily. He writes back, telling her about things happening at home. There are issues, his father is stressed, his step mother is being cagey, and Maven... he's not himself. She worries, Shade is a sixth year and she's just a fifth year, but the world feels like it is resting on their shoulders.

When they come back to school in the fall, Maven confronts her. He found the letters she wrote to Cal. He accuses her of a number of things she is horrified by. Cal steps in to push him back, and in a horrible moment, Maven draws his wand and puts to Cal's throat. The brothers stand like that for a moment, and Mare with her hand on her wand fears who she will have to point her own wand at. But Maven drops the wand, and that is that when he storms off.

The Scarlet Guard grows in number. And then it happens right before they leave for Winter Break. The earth shattering, horrible truth. The Dark One returns, and no where is safe. Hogwarts is under attack before anyone knows what is happening. Mare is fighting through the halls, throwing out hexes and charms she never thought she would have to use. She battles her way to Cal, who takes her hand and pulls her close. The Aurors arrive but they are not enough. Shade, Farley, Mare and Cal storm the upper tower. Cal makes them stay below in the hidden crawl space because Maven is up there and he can hear his father. When he gets up there, it is not what he thinks. Mare and Farley and Shade watch from below in horror as Elara uses the Imperius Curse to actually turn Cal on his father so he kills him. When that happens, the truth is revealed. Elara is the Dark One, or the new chosen Dark One among the Death Eaters. Mare storms up the steps before Elara can kill Cal, using the one spell she knows might end the duel. But Maven steps in and they end up dueling. With tears steaming down her cheeks, she tries to fight him off. But he is not fighting to stun her, he is fighting to kill her, to put her out of commission. She is disarmed, and in a horrible moment, thinks he will kill her. Elara is cooing at him to do it, to punish her for loving his brother instead of him. She pleads with him silently, begging him with her eyes not to. His lips twist as he struggles with the decision. It's too long, Shade and Farley get up the steps and force Elara and Maven to appirate away.

The world cracks open like an egg as war spills out after that.

HOLY SHIT THAT WAS LONG. ANYWAY, ENJOY EVERYONE. I'm not going back and rereading this so whatever you see is what you get XD

#(*ask lily*)#(*shut up lily*)#red queen #glass sword #kings cage #war storm #broken throne #post broken throne #oh no...I smell another fic #Hogwarts AU #lord have mercy #'she would be a THICCCCC fic #plus I'd have to do some Harry Potter rereading to freshen up my memory on things like spells etc.#my writing #my fanfics #my headcanons

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spookypotato · 3 years

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Hey! It's the 20th of January! Perfect time for me to finally post my secret santa fic I might have forgotten about right? Absolutely. So here it goes :)

This was and is still for megss (@charginger)

I also wrote her a poem and I thought I would include it :)

Your Secret Santa, it is I,

so okay, I would really lie,

if I were to tell you I would have guessed,

that you would be a bit more impressed.

Anyway this is the big reveal,

the time for my identity to unseal,

Hey, I'm Veronika, I hope you like what I made,

may it help the christmas cheer to not fade!

I had two assistants, I shall not forget,

@ninak803 and @marauderss-hp only because of them it's finally set.

there might be mistakes, at least so I worry,

my english isnt perfect, I am sorry.

Merry Christmas! you wonderful snowflake,

now read to find out what Sirius might bake!

cw: food

Hope's favourite cookies

"Hurry, Remus.", Sirius was running around in the kitchen, trying to find ingredients for their christmas cookies.

"I am, I am, although I dont think this is exacly an important task, right now."

"Remus, mon loup", he stilled for a short moment and placed a kiss on Remus' nose, "This will be my first christmas with your family. It needs to be perfect. They need to like me.", he stated, like it was obvious and began looking over the recipe, mumbling to himself.

"I'm pretty sure, you're like their favourite non-related person in the world-", realizing Sirius wasn't even listening and carefully pouring the exact amount of flour in the bowl they needed, Remus trailed off.

Walking over to his - way to stressed for this occasion - boyfriend and wrapping his arms around Sirius' waist, he told him, looking over his shoulder at the dough he'd made so far, "Baby. Please relax, alright? They already love you and it will be perfect."

When Sirius turned around in his arms Remus could see the doubt and stress on his boyfriend's face as two lines formed on his forehead. Going up to his toes, he kissed them away, like he had wanted to do for years. "Besides", Remus grabbed a bit of the dough and put it into his mouth, "not serving my mom's favourite cookies is definitely not on the bad-boyfriend-list."

Sirius finally looked a bit more relaxed. Then he suddenly narrowed his eyes at Remus, "There isn't actually a list, right?"

"'course there is", Remus answered and watched the fear as it seeped into the face in front of him. "I'm kidding, baby.", he gasped out after he couldnt hold his laughter back any longer, "Don't worry, okay? They love you and nothing will change that. Now put this dough in the fridge, there are more important things to do!"

They parked in front of the Dumais' house. Remus looked at the time displayed in Sirius car. "We're late. May be because of your obsessive need to achieve perfection, but at least we're finally done with everything right?", Remus leaned over and gave his boyfriend a kiss on the cheek.

Sirius smiled sheepishly, "Yeah, sorry. I'm just nervous, you know?"

"I promise you, the evening with our familys will be perfect. Now stop worrying, we're late.", with that Remus got out of the car leaving his boyfriend to shake out of his daze and follow.

Their arms piled with presents, they made their way to the front door, Remus using his foot to ring the doorbell, as if it was an everyday task.

The door opened with a "Bonjour!". Sirius could'nt see the other man, but recognized Pascal's voice behind the big present he was holding.

"Hey Dumo. How are you?", he heard Remus say as they walked into the living room, toeing of their shoes to not get the clean floors dirty.

"Good. Finally relaxed now that the presents are all done.", he added the last part as he moved closer to the couple, almost whispering.

It was that moment they all heard loud footsteps on the ceiling. Children running around to the direction of the staircase.

"Shit. Um-", Sirius almost threw the present into Dumos' arms, the gears in his head visibly clicking into place to find a solution for their poor time management, "Okay, Remus! Can you get the rest? I'll distract the kids."

Remus looked amused as he saw Sirius determination to not ruin the children's christmas with the shocking discovery that santa was in fact just their parents.

So he obediently got all the presents from the trunk of Sirius' car and brought them into the basement, so Pascal and Celeste could place them underneath the tree in the night.

Sirius having chased Marc up the stairs, could be heard as he probably tickled him mercilessly, if the shrieks and laughs from both boys were anything to go off of.

As his boyfriends was probably just waiting for some kind of sign from Remus, that he had stored the boxes away, he went up the stairs aswell, just catching Marc running off to his room, having escaped Sirius grasp. Sirius made a move to follow him, but stopped as he saw Remus.

"All set up?", he asked, putting his arms around Remus waist.

"Yes. Stored securely away from curious children's eyes. They probably know about Santa already, you know?", he leaned against his boyfriends chest.

Putting his chin on top of Remus head he replied, "Yeah, I know. I just don't want to risk it. I dont want to ruin their view of christmas."

"What about Santa?", came a small voice from their right. They hadn't noticed Katie's door opening. "Did you hear something from him?"

She looked a bit tired, but somehow also full of excitement for the evening and probably even more for tomorrow morning.

"Non, mon petit chat. But, usually that's a good sign.", he let go of Remus to lean down to her, "It just means that he's busy making and flying out presents. And that nothing went wrong, so let's hope we only hear from him tomorrow morning, eh?"

"Oh. Yeah, then I hope so too.", there was a short pause, but then the seven-year-old's energy came back. "Ooh, Sirius! Can you help me choose a dress for dinner?" She was jumping with excitement and how could anyone say no to that face.

He kissed Remus and smiled at him, before following Katie into her room.

"So, I have a green one, a pink one and a blue one. Which one should I wear?"

Sirius knowing she would look adorable in all of them actually couldn't decide. Her whole evening could depend on this choice. Okay, maybe he was being dramatic, but he wanted to choose a good one. Then he noticed her glancing over to the green one, again and again. So he told her that, he liked that one the best and was rewarded with a wide smile.

Kissing her head with a "See you downstairs in a bit.", he left her room to join the others in the kitchen.

Just as he wanted to enter, the door bell rang.

He went over, hearing Remus and Pascal trail behind him and opened the door.

"Merry Christmas Eve!", Hope said cheerfully and hugged Remus.

"Hi, mum. I missed you."

"You forgot about us, Re'?", he just saw Julian run up to them, from where he had still been at the car, jumping up to his brother.

Remus lifted him with ease, "Wait, who are you again?". At the shocked expression of his brother he cracked up, laughing and getting them both inside.

"Pascal.", he Lyall greeted, "Thank you so much for hosting us all this Christmas."

"We're happy to have you! You're Sirius' family, so you're mine! Now, come inside. It's way too cold out here and dinner is almost done."

They all went into the kitchen. The food smelled amazing, so it was pretty hard not to be drawn to Celeste's current working space. Even though she was clearly a bit stressed, she chipped into the conversation every once in a while.

Sirius looked around from where he was leaning against the counter, standing next to Remus, "So when will Reg be making an appearance? I didn't think he'd go out on Christmas Eve."

"Oh. He's not. He in the basement-"

Dumo was cut of by Sirius, who was now leaving the room with quick steps in the direction of the stairs, shouting, "In the- That little shit. It's Christmas, Reg!"

Finally everyone was sitting at the beautifully set table. There were candles and carefully set up evergreen twigs, next to the delicious Christmas feast (it could not be described as a dinner). From were the table was positioned, everyone also had a wonderful view of their Christmas tree. Decorated with red and gold ornaments and an angel on the very top.

As soon as they had all sat down to eat, the stress Sirius had piled onto himself was somehow gone. He held up easy conversations with everyone, even one on one with Lyall. He seemed like he'd known them for years. They talked about hockey and the ride here and Remus really enjoyed watching his boyfriend bond with his family.

Until his mum joined in again, having had a separate conversation with Pascal about their kids.

"You know, I have video of Remus and Julian on christmas, when we bought them each their first hockey equipment."

Remus knew exacly how that had gone so he was determined to not show any reaction and just move on to the next topic. Sirius however had exacly the opposite planned and he never despised his boyfriend more then in that moment.

"Hope. Please. With all that holy to me, I beg you to show me that video someday."

Okay, that could go alright. Someday. Maybe Sirius would have forgotten until someday.

Once they were all finished eating and the kids were already starting to go to bed, they thanked Dumo and Celeste again, not only for the beautiful atmosphere, but also for the amazing food that left them all more than full up to the point, they couldn't even eat Celeste's christmas cookies anymore. Of course they got a to-go package full of every flavour that she had made that year.

Afterwards they all left for Sirius' house.

"Please can I drive with you? Pleeeaaase?", Julian begged Remus, standing in front of Sirius' car.

"'course, Jules-", Remus barely finished before his brother said, "Thanks. Alright, shotgun!"

And that's how Remus got to watch his boyfriend and little brother from the backseat, while they were discussing what Jules might get for Christmas.

It was a rather short ride to their house, filled with a long string of "I won't tell you." 's and "Pleeeaaaase." 's, but when they arrived Julian jumped out of the car like it was on fire.

"Easy there. You won't get any gifts from us until mum and dad are here."

Now they were all settled onto Sirius' massive couch and Julian was jumping up and down, probably breaking the springs any moment.

"Alright, seeing as Jules is ready to burst from excitement we'll start with our gifts."

Sirius left to get the big red one they had hidden in their bedroom.

Meanwhile, Hope was leaning over and noting smugly, "our gift, huh? You two bought your gifts together?"

Remus looked at her a bit sheepishly. They had been dating for over a year now, it didn't feel wrong to give out gifts together.

His mum saw his worried face and simply said, "No, don't worry. It's sweet."

Just as Remus wanted to reply his boyfriend came back into the room with Julian's gift, placing it on the floor in front of him. It was nearly as tall as Julian himself.

He picked it up and shook it. He could hear something moving inside, but that didn't help him determine what it could be.

Remus tore his eyes away from his brother's excited face, to look at his equally excited boyfriend. He was on the tips of his toes until he broke, "Come on, Jules! I'm dying here. Just rip it open!"

Remus had to laugh at Sirius impatience and enthusiasm, but he also wanted to see his brother's reaction.

"No!", was the first thing they heard and it was Lyall's voice. Apparently he had already seen part of the gift.

Julian ripped the wrapping away completely and tore the box open, revealing a lions hockey stick and a jersey, both with his number and name printed on it.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love them!", running over to his brother and Sirius and hugged them both, almost making them fall over from his force. "My team is going fo freak out!"

"I'm glad you like them."

Sirius visibly relaxed, "Can't be a real Lion, if you don't have the proper gear."

"Well, now I can! Okay, okay. I have something for you, too."

Sirius and Remus sat down and waited for Julian to get Remus' gift from where they had left them in front of the door.

"Here. For when you miss us."

Remus carefully ripped the wrapping paper away to reveal a snow globe. He turned it around a saw landmarks from his home state. It was incredible.

Remus eyes became teary. "I love it. But hopefully you'll never be gone long enough for me to miss. Oh, come here."

Jules came over and hugged him, but then the younger jumped up and ran out the door again.

He came back with another gift. He walked over to Sirius. "For you.", Julian held out he gift.

"Jules! There was no need to-"

"Its nothing, really. It's just something small. You might not like it, but I made it and I wanted to give it to you.", Julian looked a bit embarrassed, now.

Sirius removed the wrapping from the rectangular object to reveal-

"It's a picture of my family.", Julian told him.

Sirius looked at the framed photo. It was after a game. The Lupins had come down to the lockerroom. It was Lyall with his arm around Hope. Julian in front of them, flashing his brightest smile. Remus standing next to them. And to his right Sirius. Holding Remus close, a hand on Julian's shoulder, smiling. Now it was Sirius' time for tears.

"Jules, Julian. This is the sweetest gift I've ever received, thank you." Sirius couldn't really put into words how much this meant to him. To not only be accepted, but welcomed into this new family.

"Oh, come on. I- I need a group hug, please."

They all piled onto Hope like they were on the ice. Sirius being the first, hugged her the tightest, not wanting to let go. He could feel all of Julian pressed to his side and Remus as he kissed his temple. He even felt Lyall's hand from the other side on his shoulder blade, pressing the group together.

Apparently, he really didn't need any cookie bribes, it seemed like he was fine just the way he was.

mon petit chat- my little cat

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crowtrinkets · 3 years

Text

Cheap Shots

Asra and the Apprentice are tired after their escapade in the Arcana realm. However, two particular red-headed siblings decide some drinking in celebration is due. Just friends unwinding.

Word count: 2,907

Takes place after Asra and the Apprentice beat the devil in Asra's upright ending. References to earlier plot points in Asra's route. I feel I should clarify the “biscuit” in this fic is like an american biscuit, not a cookie.

I posted this on AO3 and wanted it to receive some love here as well. Enjoy!

—-

Asra and I stumbled out of the fountain exhaustion taking us as we fell to our knees. But the moment we looked at each other laughter filled the air. Laughter and relief. We beat the devil, binding him in his own realm and we saved the world. Not only ours but the world of the Arcana. I crawl over to Asra, pulling him into a hug, to which he returned wrapping his arms around me. We were tired from the massive amounts of magic we used but our joy and adrenaline were keeping us standing, well almost standing. While holding onto each other we tried to get up but to no avail, our legs shook as we held onto each other for balance making us laugh even more. Eventually, we stood and leaned against the edge of the fountain.

“I can’t believe we did that,” I say with a gasp.

“I can, you’re a really powerful magician MC, I didn’t doubt you for a second,” Asra says planting a kiss on my nose. I giggle at his response but I can see the pride in his eyes, feel it in his emotions as we bump shoulders together. He really does feel that way. I look down at our masquerade outfits, mine is a little dirty in some spots, a tear here or there, but for the most part, it's still together, Asra somehow managed with barely a stain at the bottom. For someone who leaves his belongings everywhere, he sure knows how to keep his clothes clean.

“We should go find the others,” I utter with a sigh. I want to make sure everyone is safe and so we can tell them the news of what happened in the Devil’s realm. Asra nods reaching his arm around my back to keep me steady. I mimic him and we slowly but surely make our way into the palace.

The first person we see when we walk in is Portia, she has a large tray with an assortment of treats, some appear to be leftovers from the masquerade rooms. I offer to help her carry the load but she insists she do it, stating that “heroes don’t carry their own food”. We follow her into the parlor and find everyone there. The room erupts into a flurry of sighs of relief, tears, and hugs. Especially between Asra and his parents. In our absence, everyone already introduced one another, after escaping Lucio's dining room and arresting the Courtiers.

After the energy died down we all sat, eating cookies and drinking tea. Asra recapped everyone on what happened and how we bound the devil. He did most of the talking, sensing I was more tired than I let on. Nadia informs us that the majority of the guests went home in the frenzy, and that tomorrow she’ll have to make a sort of announcement briefing the citizens on what exactly happened tonight. Asra and I volunteered to go with her to which she thanked us. After everyone finished their tea, Nadia offered us all to stay at the palace for the night. Everyone but Muriel gladly took it. Asra offered his room to his parents and said instead he can sleep in my room. I blush at the bold statement but I would want nothing more than to fall asleep in Asra's arms right now. Everyone made their way to their rooms, and after closing the door behind us Asra and I let out a collective sigh.

“I'm so glad Nadia allowed us to stay here another night,” I say. "I don’t think I would even be able to make it up the stairs of the shop even if we got a carriage ride," Asra let out a weak laugh.

“Nadia is too kind to kick us out of her home after the day we had,”

“I guess you’re right, she even gave us these beautiful outfits,” I take Asra's hand, to which he twirls me. I stumble into his arms as he wraps an arm around my waist.

“And you look amazing in it,” He leans in brushing our noses together.

“Asraaaa,” I feel my cheeks flush. He lets out a chuckle at my embarrassment, but I stay close to him. “I would like to get into some more comfortable clothes however, help me get undressed?” I whisper the last part.

“Don’t mind if I do,” he whispers back with a mischievous smile.

Asra helps me undress from my masquerade outfit and into sleep clothes, stealing a few kisses here and there. The way his hands trail my arms send shivers down my spine, his touch calms my nerves and leaves me aching for more. I set my outfit on a nearby chair after I am dressed, then turning to Asra to help him change as well. I trace my fingers up his shoulders and go to undo the clasps for his outfit but then we are interrupted.

"Knock knock!" It's Portia, lightly tapping on the door. I give Asra an apologetic smile before I go to open it for her. Portia and Julian walk in together.

"See Pasha, they were getting ready for bed! I told you we should've left them be!" Julian remarks, standing awkwardly by the door.

"Well I hope I didn't interrupt anything, but I feel we deserve a little celebration do we not? What with you saving the world and all" Portia gives us a mischievous smile. I'm not sure what she's planning but her demeanor just makes me more interested.

"Asra?" I look to my partner, who is now sitting on the bed, he gives me a half shrug.

"What do you have in mind?" He turns to Portia. Her smile grows wide as she rubs her hands together.

"Well, there's quite a bit of leftovers still, and I think I saw a few unattended bottles of Golden Goose in the kitchen?" Portia elbows Julian in the side, who returns it with his signature toothy grin.

"I could eat more," Asra chimes in.

"I think a drink or two couldn't hurt," I walk up to Portia linking our arms together. "C'mon Julian let's leave Asra to get changed while we raid the kitchen," The three of us exit the room giving Asra some privacy. I feel a little bad, allowing our alone time to be interrupted but I couldn't say no to Portia, she works so hard for the Countess and I think we all deserve to blow off some steam. Portia giggles as we walk to the kitchen, our arms still linked.

"Do you do this often, Portia?" I say, she shakes her head.

"Sometimes I snag a cookie or two, but there's so much leftover food that we can't just let it go to waste!"

"And besides, all the food is for the guests, and we are technically guests," Julian chimes in, walking ahead of us. When we finally make it to the kitchen, Portia peers in first ensuring it's empty. With a nod, Julian and I follow her in. If I thought the tables were full of food in the masquerade rooms, the kitchen's stock dwarfed them. I don't think I have ever seen so much food in my life. Every counter and tabletop has some sort of interesting food. From fruit to meats to vegetables and elaborately decorated pastries, the kitchen had it all. Portia hands me a basket to which I start loading the more delicious-looking food. I add a couple of pastries I think Asra will like and I continue filling the basket until I am satisfied. Julian grabs a large bottle of Golden Goose and hands another to me so he can snag a few extra rolls. Porta has a smaller basket full of delectable foods as well. Satisfied with our bounty we leave the kitchen giggling amongst ourselves. Basket on my arm and bottle in my hand I survey the food we all gathered.

"I don't think we'll be able to finish this all in one night, in four nights maybe, but this is quite a bit," I say, realizing just how heavy my basket now feels.

"Well, better get started now!" Portia says holding up a biscuit to put in my mouth. I chuckle and lean forward to take it, tasting powdered sugar once it makes contact, the moment my teeth sink into it I hear a voice stopping me mid-bite

"Oh my, celebrating are we?"

Portia lets out a peep, letting go of my biscuit and Julian freezes at the sound of a man's voice. I turn towards its source, biscuit still in my mouth. Oh my indeed, Salim and Aisha stand in front of us, eyes trailing from Julian's hands to Portia then to mine. I flush, I JUST met Asra's parents and now they've caught us sneaking food and alcohol in the hallways, so much for first impressions… second? I'm too flustered to think straight. With my free hand, I remove the biscuit, swallowing the bite in my mouth.

"Um….. Yes?" I may not remember having parents but I can't help but feel like I'm in trouble with the way they're looking at me. Salim and Aisha both let out a laugh. The three of us all look at each other confused.

"My love, let them have their fun," Aisha says with a smile, she turns to us with a warm expression. "We're going to bed now, make sure to stay in the Palace," the three of us all nod quickly in unison. With a wave, they turn the corner and head to their room. All three of us let out a breath we didn't know we were holding.

"Well, I felt like a teenager getting caught sneaking a drink again," Julian says, his voice slightly wavering.

"You said it," Portia says, shoulders relaxing. They both turn to me. Julian suddenly stifles a laugh, Portia's smile growing wide.

"What?" I say. They both burst into laughter, Portia then shushing Julian but still unable to hide her amusement. "What, what is it?" I am very confused and slightly embarrassed, I look around to make sure nothing is behind me. Nope, no one here.

"Nothing nothing, just uhhh, nervous laughter, yes," Julian says between laughs, they both snicker and start to make their way back to my room. I follow, my confusion still brewing. We finally make it to the door to which Julian knocks, he must hear Asra say come in cause he opens the door, allowing Portia and me in first. Asra is turned around placing his own outfit on the same chair, dressed in sleep clothes. I walk to the bed and place my items down on the floor. Asra approaches me looking at the haul of food I brought but then his eyes go wide when he sees my face.

"Ah, love you have a bit of," he turns me to face the mirror. There is powdered sugar and jelly on my face. I look at the biscuit Portia handed to me earlier, sure enough, there is jelly inside.

"Portia! Julian!" I swing around to be met with the sight of Portia and Julian laughing. They both fall to the floor continuing to cackle at my misfortune.

"Oh, I am so sorry MC! I didn't even notice," Portia says between breaths. I let out a frustrated grunt. They are not going to let me live this down, especially knowing Aisha and Salim saw this as well, so much for giving heroes respect. Asra turns me to face him, rubbing his thumb on the corner of my mouth, licking the contents off.

"Delicious," he whispers. I roll my eyes and turn once again to the two redheads who have now calmed down.

"So are we eating or what," I say, hands on my hips.

---

The four of us sit on the floor in front of the fireplace, food in the center and one bottle empty. Portia suggested that we play "never have I ever". Asra is laying on the floor, head in my lap occasionally sitting up when he has to drink. Julian is to his right and Portia to the right of him. Faust has taken to cuddling up to the fire, sleeping soundly. Occasionally Julian flinches when she moves. At first, I was a little nervous to play this game, being as I do not have as much life experience or memories as the three of them do, but I have learned a lot about my friends. For example, I learned that Portia has gone streaking, Julian has lost a game of strip poker, and Asra has never killed a plant. I feel he fibbed that one but I let it slide, for now. As the night went on, we started taking obviously cheap shots at each other, such as never have I ever served the countess food, or never have I ever had an eyepatch. Nothing like some friendly animosity, to get your friends drunk with.

"Ilya your turn," Portia says as she pops another pastry into her mouth. Julian thinks for a second, making a show of it by going "hm" loudly. Asra taps him with his foot earning a yelp from the red-haired man.

"Okay okay, never have I ever…. Lived once," Julian's smile is wide as he gives me a knowing look, his eyebrows wiggling. I know he got his memories back from the hanged man so I shouldn't be too surprised that he knows about my situation.

"Oh that one is lame," Portia says with an annoyed tone, after taking a swig she passes the bottle to Asra who sits up, takes a sip, and lays down placing the bottle back in the center, going back to sleep. Portia turns to me with a puzzled look.

"Why haven't you drank MC?" I quickly shoot Julian a look, raising my eyebrows, causing him to flinch under my stare. He gives me a weak shrug.

"I didn't have the time," he whispers arms up in surrender. Portia's gaze snaps from me to him and back to me.

"I'll tell you later," I whisper. As much as I would hate for Portia to be in the dark, I would rather not talk about my death, especially with Asra here. Asra looks up at me from my lap telling me I can skip his turn, something about his "head-spinning too much", with a wink I think of my next topic.

"Never have I eveerrrr," I trail off, still thinking. Julian may have been on my side in his "living once" comment, but this game is free reign, everyman for themselves. "Never have I ever, been on a pirate ship,"

"What! No fair!" Portia squawks out. I let out a laugh and shrug, doing my best to look innocent.

"MC! You wound me!" Julian lets out, however still reaching for the bottle, after taking a swig he hands it to Portia who mutters before taking a sip. I look down at Asra nudging him, I don't forget his story about the little game he played with Faust in his youth. He opens one eye to look at me, smiles, and then closes it again pretending to be asleep. I roll my eyes.

"I'll do you one better MC," Portia says. "Never have I ever kissed Asra!" Julian lets out a laugh as I reach for the bottle taking a long slow sip. I side-eye him, remembering something, the alcohol gets the better of my common sense. Pulling the bottle from my lips I angle it towards Julian.

"Drink up," I say. Oh my god did I just do that? Julian flushes, he opens his mouth to protest but when I remain unmoving, he sheepishly takes the bottle and takes a sip. Portia's jaw drops as she watches her brother swallow the beverage. By now Asra has sat up gawking at Julian. Portia stands.

"I am waaaaay to drunk for this," she states, she grabs Julian by the arm lifting him up, he yelps but follows through, "And I'm cutting you off Ilya, goodnight guys," Portia leaves the room, dragging Julian with her and closes the door behind her. After it closes I swear I can hear Portia yelling, followed by Julian's protests, but it soon disappears with their footsteps. Asra turns to speak.

"How did you-" I put a finger to his lips to shush him.

"A magician never reveals their secrets Asra," I say with a wink, I turn to Faust who is still laying by the fire, but I can almost sense a mischievousness coming from her. I turn back towards Asra who is now yawning, I guess we have been up for a while. I stand to help him to his feet, swaying slightly from all the drinking. Faust slithers over to him who picks her up and the three of us climb into bed. Asra lays on his back and I snuggle into him, my head resting on his chest as I listen to his heartbeat.

"Mmmm, I am not looking forward to the headache tomorrow," I hum out.

"Well I guess we'll just have to sleep all day in the shop until you feel better," Asra says, rubbing his hand along my back. With a nod, I feel sleep slowly begin to overtake me as I am wrapped in the arms of the person with who I feel safe and love more than anything.

#the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana asra #the arcana julian #the arcana portia #the arcana faust #asra alnazar #julian devorak #portia devorak #the arcana fic #the arcana fanfic #crow writes

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arcxus-of-altihex · 4 years

Text

New Beginnings (or, the one where Julian gets blackmailed)

It was a peculiar night. One that was far too quiet.

Even the owls were silent, and not a single drunk villager was loitering in the streets after curfew. The only noises were the rustling of leaves as the wind danced through them, but they sounded eerie and unfamiliar when coupled with the groaning branches of a dying willow tree. A haunting sound, almost like an omen.

It was as if the night was waiting for something to occur, for some sort of mischief or unseen, peculiar happenings under the light of a full moon. Like listening to the calm before some unknown storm, and it set Cassius even more on edge.

He was unfortunately awake, leaning against the wall of the kitchen and nursing a cup of tea. He sighed, willing the memories of his nightmares to dissipate into the void they’d come from. The tea was nice, but for whatever reason it failed to calm his nerves tonight.

Whatever is going to happen, he thought sourly, better happen soon.

Then the sound of a single pair of feet on the cobblestone path outside caught his attention. The sound was very faint,, but growing stronger and more sure as they undoubtedly approached the clinic. Who would be coming to the clinic this late? Cassius wondered, setting his drink aside. An emergency?

He felt dread settle in his heart as it occurred to him that whoever they were, they must be very, very desperate to be coming here at nearly two in the morning.

But the knock on the door he was waiting for never came. Instead, he listened as the person seemed to creep around to the back of the building before circling back to the front, turned the corner, and then stopped at the side window.

A burglar, then? Cassius thought, irritated. He grabbed the sword he kept hidden away, intent on getting this over with as quick as possible.

The wooden frame creaked as someone tested the locked window, followed by the shatter of glass as they broke it. From where he was hidden, Cassius could see reflected moonlight dancing on the far wall from shards on the ground, just past the corner wall. There was a soft thud as a shadow tumbled in, a chair creaking as it was pushed aside, a quietly hissed curse followed by the scrabble of boots on the dusty ground.

His ears twitched, honed in on the sound. Cassius crept closer, listening to the intruder’s nervous heartbeat as they moved around, searching for something.

He wasn’t too worried, he’d hidden everything of value when he’d first moved here. They’d find nothing, unless they knew exactly where to look.

Even still… the way the intruder almost seemed at ease here, it intrigued Cassius.

There was a shuffle of paper, the sound of cloth rustling and shifting, soft footfalls that followed as they strode into the next room, clearly familiar with the layout of this weary, run-down clinic. Someone tall, given their stride, and perhaps a little clumsy since they just knocked over a stack of folders. The muttering was new, though. Most burglars weren’t… this bold.

Almost amused, Cassius realized the intruder must think they’re alone.

Well then, he thought, readying his sword just in case, let’s see who they are.

Two silent, unheard steps later, Cassius saw the other person fully for the first time.

He froze.

Oh.

Unmistakable, bright red hair and a lanky frame illuminated elegantly by moonlight. An elegant face with clever eyes and a sharp nose, and a worryingly pale complexion. The purple shade framing those silver-grey eyes seemed painted on, and Cassius couldn’t tell if it was from makeup or insomnia. They were muttering to themselves, looking through old folders that the doctor who worked here, before Cassius, had left behind.

And given this man’s striking appearance, Cassius had a hunch the intruder and the former doctor — his friend Portia’s missing brother, Julian Devorak — were one and the same.

The coat thrown on the table, and the plague mask that rested atop it, merely confirmed Cassius’ suspicions.

After a moment of staring at the admittedly handsome man, he chose to trust in the stories Portia had told, and decided to make himself known.

He offered a questioning croon, trying not to startle the other.

The intruder startled spectacularly nonetheless, head whipping up and yelping as they noticed Cassius.

He watched as they stepped back, then tripped over a chair, and then nearly toppled the shelf behind them as they tried to right themselves. The stack of papers they’d been looking at went flying, knocked over by a flailing arm as they lost their fight with gravity and fell backwards.

Cassius took in the disheveled figure, pages that were thrown up still fluttering about and fought the urge to snicker at the open, surprised expression on their face. It was, he could admit, a little bit adorable. Just a little. Not that they ever needed to know.

“Ah—” they said, “Ahaha, I was just… sleepwalking. Just a completely accidental midnight stroll, you know?”

Cassius frowned. Was this really the excuse they were going to go with?

“It happens sometimes,” they continued, “It’s not really that uncommon, a lot of people sleepwalk. Surely I’m not the first you’ve met?”

Cassius gave the man a flat look, then signed, Sleepwalking, really?

There was a long, baited moment where they simply stared at each other, before the intruder slumped with a defeated sigh.

“Well, there seems to be no fooling you,” they said, running a hand through their curls, “You’ve caught me, then. What are you going to do?”

Cassius let the silence hang, thinking about it.

I’ll tell your sister, he signed, lips tugging up in a wry smile.

The man’s face paled, grey eyes wide in disbelief.

“You wouldn’t.”

Try me.

“I’m already a wanted man!” They protested, “I don’t need to be a dead one!”

Cassius tilted his head, studying them. It was almost comical, this sudden fear they had about their loved ones knowing they were here This was a person burdened by many secrets, someone on the run, someone with something to hide even from their closest family.

His curiosity only grew.

I wonder why you came back here, of all places, he thought, risking capture to go through a few files about the plague?

He sighed inwardly, already knowing that he wanted to give the intruder a chance. He told himself it was only because Portia had assured him many times over her brother was, at heart, a good person, despite all the wanted posters that said otherwise.

You have until morning to convince me otherwise, he signed, keeping his expression neutral, a single pale eyebrow raised.

There was a quiet moment while the intruder thought about it, clearly weighing the consequences. Slowly, a coy, playful look spread across the fugitive doctor’s face.

“Alright,” he purred, “Now that sounds like a challenge. What’s your name, angel?”

Cassius stepped back in surprise, the tips of his ears heating up and a soft blush dusting his cheeks. Portia had warned him that her brother was a notorious flirt, but the sudden endearment still took him off guard.

C-a-s-s-i-u-s S-n-o-w, he fingerspelled. Do you flirt with people holding swords regularly, or am I just special?

“Julian Devorak,” the man replied, “But you know that, don’t you? Flirting with danger is a beloved hobby of mine.”

And what about breaking and entering?

“It’s not breaking in if I still own this place.”

Do you? Cassius asked.

“Do I what?”

Still own this place, Cassius signed. You’re a fugitive, Doctor Devorak.

Devorak’s grey eyes met Cassius’ blue ones, and he held the dragon’s icy gaze unflinchingly. Then his expression suddenly softened, followed by a smirk as he seemed satisfied with what he’d found, and the sudden change left Cassius reeling.

“And you’re an enigma, Cassius Snow,” Julian Devorak grinned, “But I do love a good challenge.”

You have four hours, Cassius reminded, sheathing his sword and taking a seat atop one of the work tables. Convince me.

The handsome, red-haired stranger stood up, dusting his pants. He spun a chair out, sitting down with a weary sigh. For a moment, he simply studied the papers still in his hands, expression clouded, before folding them and setting them aside. Arms crossed and leaning against the chair with a practiced ease, he looked up at Cassius with a cocky, roguish grin.

“Well,” he said, “I suppose I should start at the beginning. Not the true beginning, of course, since I’m sure no one wants to hear the earlier bits of my life story, but from where everything began to go wrong. I’m sure you’ve heard about the red plague…”

As Cassius listened to the man’s smooth, clever voice and watched the dorky, adorable gesturing as the intruder spun his tale, Cassius came to the sinking realization that he wanted to help this fool.

“… and so I remain a wanted man, and will be leaving the moment morning comes,” Devorak finished, hands coming to rest in his lap.

Where will you go? Cassius asked.

“Oh you know, here and there. Travel the rest of the world, perhaps. Never in one place for too long. I’ll be out of your pretty hair for good, you’ll never even have to see me again.”

Seems a shame, Cassius signed, I was thinking that you seemed someone worth knowing.

“...Oh,” They said, looking almost surprised, “Well, I suppose it remains a shame, then. Those wanted posters aren’t just for show.”

What if I came with you?

The words were signed before Cassius even realized what he was asking. Eyes wide with surprise, he rushed to add that it was a mistake, and that he didn’t mean it but… that would almost be a lie, he realized, hands stilling, because I do want to tag along. Fuck.

“… what?” Devorak echoed, expression just as baffled as Cassius felt.

What if I come with you? He repeated, this time more certain. Being alone is never fun. Besides, he added, smirk playing across his lips, if I’m gone as well I can’t tell your sister, now can I?

Devorak laughed, light and genuine and welcome in the moonlit foyer, and the beauty of it struck Cassius like a sudden gust of frigid wind. It was something precious, that laugh. Something Cassius found he wanted to hear again, many times.

“Alright, if you really want to.” Julian agreed, “Company would be lovely, even if I’m being blackmailed into it.” His tone was light, almost teasing. There was a pause before he added, “Though I’ll have you know this is the sweetest form of blackmail I’ve ever encountered.”

And that’s how, hours later, Cassius found himself on a boat, listening as Julian explained the basics of sailing, both of them watching as dawn broke over the horizon and sent the sky into stunning shades of pink, orange and gold. Julian was grinning, eyes bright as he gazed at the sight.

What’s got you so happy? Cassius asked.

“It just seems like the perfect day to begin something new,” Julian said, turning to face him. “Don’t you think?”

— — —

Aaaaand now we have context for the picture from last day :D

#//i hope this doesn't suck #cassius #julian #lovelikeyours2020 #arc writes #the arcana #fan apprentice #lore #txt #something cute

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fiesta-freddie · 5 years

Text

December Nights| Paul x Reader

Request: Hey I was wondering if I could request Paul x reader? They can either be in a relationship or not but basically the reader from Paul’s pov? Like she can be messing about and joking with the others and Paul’s just admiring her and realising how much he loves her? Just really fluffy.. your writing is really good too btw thank you!

Summary: Paul has has liked you for quite some time now. He realizes how much his love was grown for you and decides to take action, and who knows maybe it was a good idea

A/N: If you didn’t pick up on it in the request, this whole thing is from Paul’s point of view. It was a little different than what I’m used to doing so sorry if it didn’t turn out the best, but I kinda like it! Let me know what you think of it! Feedback is always appreciated! Enjoy!

******

“-so I told him, it’s called Arthur!”

Everyone broke out into a fit of laughter after George’s comment. I watched as Y/N sat beside me laughing too, admiring all her breath taking features. I watched as her cheeks became full with color and how her lips formed into that beautiful smile she wore so often. She could light up an entire room with that smile. It was the kind that was contagious, one look at it and suddenly you were happy, no matter what mood you were in.

We all sat at a large round table in the corner of a small pub. It was a way to escape from the outside world for a night, especially since it was warm inside and it was getting colder outside as the night progressed. The fact it was getting closer to winter too didn’t help.

It was later in the evening and only a few other groups of people were in the pub. Music played in the background as small talk filled the room. Busboys walked around collecting empty glasses from tables and brining new ones as well.

“Well, its getting pretty late I should be heading out now. Thank you all for the lovely evening.” Y/N said in her sweet and soft voice. It was like music to my ears whenever she talked. Her voice was so calm and innocent. “I’ll see you all at the studio tomorrow?”

“You bet love, we’ll see you there!” Ringo responded to her. Everyone else nodded as they said their goodbyes. I watched as she walked out the door and into the dark. The streetlights shining through the small crack where she had slipped out.

I sat at the table for a few seconds after Y/N walked out the door, before standing up. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna head out too. Its getting pretty late, ya know.”

“So soon Paul?” George asked me from across the table, a hint of suspicion in his voice

“Yeah yer usually one of the last to leave.” John joined in

“Well ya know, its getting pretty late and we’ve all gotta be in the studio tomorrow. I’m just gonna call it a night, plus you know that Eppy won’t be happy if we come in hungover.” I only received grumbles in response

“Well I guess if you must go, then we’ll see ya tomorrow Macca?” John said more than asked. I gave him a nod in response before waving goodbye and quickly heading out the door.

As soon as I stepped outside, the cold hit my face sending goosebumps throughout my body. I quickly walked down the sidewalk in the direction Y/N had gone, hoping that I would run into her along the way. Continuing to walk, I saw a small figure only a few feet ahead of me. I called out to it, hoping that it was Y/N I was talking to and not some random stranger.

“Y/N love, is that you?” I called out. I could see the breath escaping my mouth as I spoke

The figure turned around quickly in response to my words. “Paul?” It was Y/N! “What are you doing out here?” she questioned me “I thought you were going to stay at the pub a little longer?”

“Yeah, I though I would call it quits early tonight. Eppy isn't to happy when we come in the studio hungover anyways.” I said shrugging and walking over to her.

I stood in front of Y/N, admiring her once again. Her eyes sparkled at the street lights reflected off of them. The tip of her nose was a rosy color as were her cheeks. Her lips were turning blue slowly and she was shivering just enough for me to tell that she was freezing cold, even if she didn't say anything. She wore her signature smile on her face which, despite it being cold outside, sent a warm feeling throughout me.

“I see,” she nodded “its probably a good idea too. I can almost bet that tomorrow John’ll be the one who shows up with a hangover.” She giggled, covering her mouth with her hand

“Yeah, I don’t doubt that one bit.” I chuckled along with her.

“So, Y/N where exactly are you headed off to then?” I asked her. Where are you going? Really? Why would you ask that, Macca? Obviously shes going home.

“Oh well, I was actually just walking back home.”

“Right, I knew that.” I said with a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of my neck

“I don’t suppose you’d like to walk with me, would you? Its only a few blocks away.” Y/N asked. Her teeth chattered slightly as she spoke

“Y-yeah of course, I’d be happy to.”

She gave me a simple smile before starting to walk again. “Oh Y/N! Wait! Before you keep walking, here.” I said offering her my jacket

“No Paul, its okay you keep it, its your jacket.”

“Y/N sweetheart, you look like you need it more than I do. Your shivering!” I said putting the jacket over her shoulders, on top the of one she was already wearing.

“Thanks Paul.”

We continued to walk for a few minutes in silence. The only noise that could be heard was the sound of the wind blowing across the ground and against the windows of shops.

“So Paul, how’s the album coming along?” Y/N asked trying to start conversation, but I could tell she was also genuinely curious

“Pretty good, I would say. We’ve got a couple of weeks left until we’re finished with it though. I think it’s gonna be one of our best yet!”

“That’s great, I’m excited to hear it! Well I mean other than what I’ve heard from sitting in on the recordings, but even then its not much ‘cause us girls are always in the other room talking.” She giggled

“Oh yeah? About what?”

“Oh you know girl stuff. Pattie is always keeping us to date about her ‘n George. She wants him to propose to her. We all think he’s going to, I mean they’re like soulmates. It would be stupid for him not to.”

“Yeah they do make a cute pair, don’t they?”

“Indeed they do.” She said with a smile, which then caused me to do the same. Like I said its contagious.

“And Cynth is always busy taking care of Julian. We all love him, such a cute little fella. And he looks just like John too!”

“He really does, he’s got his fathers face and everything doesn’t he?”

“Yeah, hes pretty adorable. Makes me want a little one myself sometimes.” She said with a shrug. I looked over to her and smiled. She was so cute whenever she got excited about something. It sent butterflies though my stomach, causing my love for Y/N to only grow

“I’m sorry, I just keep going on and on here. What about you boys, surely you have some interesting conversations too don’t ya?” She asked me

“I guess we do. Its mostly just goofing off though, I don’t know how many times we’ve had to re-record because me and John start laughing or someone will make a joke about something. Its a wonder we’ve gotten as far as we have, really.” I said laughing. Y/N started laughing along with me to.

Soon it died down though and we we’re back to walking in silence until we reached her flat. We stayed side by side the entire time, sometimes getting closer to each other but then quickly going back to where we were once we realized how close out bodies were.

“Well, this is it.” She said walking up to the door “I- uh- thank you for walking back with me Paul, I really appreciate it. You made it a lot less lonely.” Her face was dimly lit due to the streetlights being further away. Nevertheless she still looked absolutely stunning.

“Oh yeah, no problem Y/N. It was my pleasure.”

“Oh! Before I forget here.” She said taking my jacket off her shoulders and handing it to me.

“No its okay, you can keep it. Who knows? If your out walking late again you might need it.” I said with a playful wink causing us both to release a small laugh.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m positive, love. Its all yours.”

“Thank you Paulie.” She said sweetly, turning to open the door.

Before she could get any further I stopped her.

“Y/N, t-there’s something I need to tell you.” I said quickly regaining her attention. She looked up at me with her soft eyes and a warm smile across her face.

“Sure Paul, what is it?”

“Well you see I’ve wanted to tell you for a while now, but I just haven’t had the chance to. But I- well you see, I really like you Y/N a lot and I have for a while and I guess- I don’t know.” I said stumbling over my words. Wow, way to play it smooth Macca.

I was distracted from my thoughts by a pair of soft lips being pressed onto mine. Before I knew it, they we’re slowly being pulled away.

“I really like you too, Paul.” Y/N said with a grin on her face “I always have.”

“What do you say we keep that going then?” I asked stepping closer to her and placing my hands on her waist. She snaked her arms around my neck and leaned in for another kiss. Another sweet, yet passionate one.

Reluctantly we both pulled away in order to regain our breath. The wind still blew across the dimly lit streets, bringing the cold air along with it. Seconds of silence passed before any more words were spoken. “Its, getting pretty late. I should probably head back home.” I said before beginning to turn away

Y/N quickly grabbed my arm before I could get any further. “Well I mean Paul, you did walk an awfully long way and I would feel bad if you had to walk all the way back especially if it’s in the cold.” She said “Why don’t you come inside and we can...cuddle?”

A bright smile immediately grew on my face. “Well, how could I say no to that?” I said playfully before leaning down to press another kiss to her lips.

————-

Taglist: @beatlevmania @wrongbea-tle @john-lemonade @ineedyoubygeorgeharrison @princesof-theuniverse @harrimoon

Let me know if you want it be added to the taglist!

#the beatles #john lennon #george harrison #ringo starr #paul mccartney #the beatles imagine #the beatles x reader #john lennon imagine #john lennon x reader #george harrison imagine #george harrison x reader #ringo starr x reader #ringo starr imagine #paul mccartney imagine #paul mccartney x reader #my work

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getbacktoworknovice · 4 years

Text

💕Favorite Shirt 💕

(A fun little Modern!AU Julian and Ahria I did that was floating around in my head for a while~ Julian's a doctor and Ahria was his cleaning lady before things got serious~ Now she comes and cleans for him when she knows he has to work extra or longer shifts~ story under the cut, No warnings, just fluff!)

Julian sighed, grateful to finally be home. Twenty-four-hour shifts were awful and he had little patience for his colleagues at the hospital. He just wanted to take a long bath, have a glass of wine and pass out on his couch. He fished for his keys but when he went to turn them in the lock he realized it was already unlocked. He was confused for a split second before he remembered Ahria had a key. She must have come to clean. How sweet of her.

He gave a small smile to himself as he came inside, closing the door behind him and shucking off his coat, laying it and his bag on the kitchen island, hearing Ahria call his name from the living room. “Julian? Is that you?” She asked and he couldn’t help the smile that came to his lips. Just hearing her voice made him feel better.

When she came into the kitchen however, he stopped short, his face looking stricken as he took in her appearance. She was wearing one of his button-up shirts and, he was certain, not wearing any pants. “Hey sweetie,” She said snapping him out of it, coming over to him and putting a hand to his cheek gently. “Ah you look so tired,” She said, pausing when he didn’t respond. “Are you all right?” She asked and he realized he had been staring.

“No- ah yes- I mean, I’m fine.” He said, his face flushing and her brows furrowed worriedly. “I just...I wasn’t expecting to see you...Here…in my clothes.” He said, looking down at her. Ahria looked down as well looking a bit sheepish.

“Oh yes, I spilled some stinky cleaning agent on my clothes so I threw them in the wash,” She explained. “I didn’t think you would mind, I just needed to borrow it for a bit while I waited for mine to get clean. I can…change into something else if you don’t want me wearing this…” She said. Julian looked everywhere but at her, his face turning redder and redder.

“No- no it’s fine I was just surprised.” He said and Ahria tilted her head at him before giving a small smile and gently patting his cheek. “Why don’t you go and take a bath, relax a bit while I finish cleaning?” She said. “I ran one for you when you texted me you were coming home.” She assured him, pecking him on the lips gently and patting his chest as he nodded in agreement, before turning to get back to work.

Julian wanted to reach out for her. Take her in his arms and kiss her and hold her but he decided against it at the last possible second, as the idea of a bath was far more tempting at the moment. His sleep-deprived brain was craving warmth, comfort and relaxation. Of course after seeing his beloved in one of his shirts he had his mind on other things…but he swatted the thoughts away and went to the bathroom.

He was greeted by a tub full of warm water, steam rising from it in little wisps, the water swirling with bath salts and the smell of lavender relaxing him almost instantly. Ahria certainly knew how to spoil him, and he smiled to himself as he undressed, sinking his aching, tired body down into the tub, letting out a groan of relief. This was exactly what he needed.

He laid his head back against the lip of the tub, closing his eyes and trying to take a quick cat nap but images of Ahria kept flooding into his vision and he had to dunk water on his head to keep from getting too deep in thought about it. He shivered, letting the water wash over his head and neck, rubbing there as he was sore from leaning over all day. Many of his colleagues were shorter than him so he constantly had to crane his neck and stoop to see what they were looking at, especially on computer screens and microscopes. He felt a knot on the nape of his neck and sighed. He really needed a massage; he had stress built up everywhere.

He was in the bath until he got pruny, even after having washed his hair and self, simply relaxing and enjoying the warmth until it became lukewarm going cold, leaning forward to pull the plug and let the water drain. He got out, drying himself and getting dressed into some clean clothes she’d left out for him as well. Once he got to the shirt he stopped. It was a button-up pajama shirt, blue in color, but Ahrias form in his white one came to his mind.

He left the bathroom without putting it on, going to find her. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. He stopped short again when he got to his room, their room, and saw her on her knees on top of the dresser, cleaning the mirror that hung above it. She turned when she saw him in the mirror, his entire face and the tips of his ears turning pink.

He knew she wasn’t doing it on purpose but she was torturing him.

“Hey, did you enjoy your bath?” She asked, hopping down off the dresser. “I used those bath salts you like; I hope it was as relaxing as the packaging promised.” She teased, going over to him. He could smell the cleaning supplies she’d been using as well as her perfume as she came closer and he couldn’t stop himself. He met her halfway and pulled her to him, kissing her deeply and gripping her tight, his arms firmly around her waist.

Ahria was caught off guard but certainly didn’t mind it, kissing him in return and placing her hands on either side of his face, holding him close. Eventually Julian had to pull away to breathe and he buried his face into her neck, taking in her scent and kissing her there. He sighed in content and Ahria smiled, running a hand through his hair gently, holding him close.

“Aw, did you have a bad day?” She asked teasingly and he groaned.

“I’m never going back to that place I swear.” He assured her as he always did when he came back from a twenty-four-hour shift. “Too many morons, not enough brain cells to go around.” He said against her shoulder, closing his eyes to simply enjoy her embrace. “I’ve missed you…” he said softly.

“I missed you too,” She assured him, resting her head atop his, gently stroking his back. He massaged his fingers into her hips, turning his head to kiss her neck gently again and again, making her giggle. “Juliaaaan, you need to go get dressed,” She said, looking at his half-naked form. “Or finish getting dressed.” She insisted and he looked down at her.

“I can’t, you’re wearing my favorite shirt.” He said and she looked down at the shirt questioningly.

“This one?” She asked seriously. “I pulled it out from the bottom drawer I thought it was an old one…” She mumbled to herself.

“It is an old one but it’s my favorite one now.” He assured her.

“Now? Why now?” She asked in bewilderment and he smiled softly at her.

“Because you’re wearing it.”

Ahria was a more serious woman. True she lived for teasing him but she was a very focused and no-nonsense person when it got down to it. Case in point, it was very difficult to get her flustered or to make her blush. Of course, Julian loved a challenge and was more than happy to try and he had gotten her a few times but very rarely. Today however he was in luck because she blushed brightly, looking away so he wouldn’t see but he had.

“You’re blushing.” He teased in a sing-song way, making her swat at him with her cleaning rag.

“You!” She said, pulling away from him. “Go put a shirt on!” She insisted but Julian grabbed her, pulling her close to him and fumbling with her buttons making her blush even more and wriggle, trying to get loose. “Julian, let go!”

“Give me my shirt and I will.” He insisted teasingly, blowing raspberries into her neck and making her laugh, her blush getting worse as she tried to wriggle away. He was relentless, holding her tight and not letting her get away an inch which was easy since he was, in her words, “freakishly tall with long limbs”. “Or counter offer, I can take what I have off-” He teased and she smacked him in the head.

“Julian!”

“What? No one’s here you know, it’s just us.”

“Yes but you just worked twenty-four hours in a row, you need sleep not to fool around.” She insisted as he looked up to her from his position nuzzling her neck with a devilish smile.

“Fooling around helps me sleep.” He insisted and she rolled her eyes.

“Julian.” She said flatly and he whined, pouting up at her.

“Won’t you have pity for a poor doctor who just needs some love?” He questioned making her look down at him with an unamused smirk.

“No.” She insisted and he groaned, standing up reluctantly but still holding her close.

“Okay, final offer,” he said as she tried to squirm away, getting her attention as she looked up at him. “I lay down and you lay down with me but I won’t try to get in your…” He said, noting again that she wasn’t wearing any pants. “Well…shirt.” He said, making her blush again and refuse to look at him which only made him grin widely.

“Just stay with me until I fall asleep…is that a suitable exchange of services?” He asked, his grin turning to a soft smile, rocking her back and forth a bit gently. She rolled her eyes in thought, mulling it over and he leaned down again to smooch her cheek.

“Oh…all right,” She started, poking him in the chest. “But you have to keep your hands to yourself.” She said and he sighed dramatically, sliding his hands from her hips to release her from his grip.

“Oh if I must,” he teased with a wink. “I can behave, I promise.” He assured her and she sighed but it ended in a smile. She turned him and gently pushed on his arm, guiding him to the bed so he could finally lay down. Julian didn’t realize how tired he was because he almost instantly fell asleep the moment his head hit the soft, fluffed pillows. He yawned, gave Ahria a sleepy smile when she joined him and said; “I love you…” Before passing out cold.

#the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana julian #julian x apprentice #apprentice x julian #mc x julian #julian x mc #ahria #apprentice oc

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idkthisisjustforfanfic · 5 years

Text

Chapter 13 - Come Sunday

I was in the back of an Uber on my way to the label when it came on the radio. I wasn’t really paying attention--more just mindlessly scrolling on my phone--when I heard words that sounded eerily familiar.

Hearing my songs on the radio wasn’t new--I’d grown used to hearing phrases that once felt intimate get cycled in and out of headphones, radios and stereos alike. But my mouth went a bit dry, though, when I realized that not only was this song mine and mine alone, but it was also on Capital FM.

One Direction had made it big, clearly. Their singles were on the most popular radio stations and played in every mall across the world. But my song, with a different artist, and not written with the help of four or five other people, this felt like a different accomplishment entirely.

I didn’t want to ask the driver to turn it up, so instead, I leaned forward and closed my eyes to listen more closely.

In aIl honesty, I hadn’t paid much attention to all of the meetings I’d had with Julian in the week since I’d been back from the States. I had signed on the dotted line like I always had--I’d get X percent, the label would get a different chunk, and a large piece to the artist(s).

I’d met the two girls, Bella & Rae--as they were calling themselves, and they felt like a good fit. They could produce harmonies that sounded chilling and beautiful at the same time, which definitely sounded better than my double tracks on protools.

But I hadn’t really prepared for the song to do this well. The group was new--they’d done some small tours around the U.K., mostly some songs they’d written and some covers. They were popular on the small club scene, and it almost felt safe to give my first solo song to them.

They weren’t huge--if the song was a flop, if they were a flop, no one would have to know.

Hearing the song I’d written on my couch about Harry over the speakers in my Uber felt as if people would know. Suddenly, what was once a private moment of uncertainty and heartache was suddenly public, accessible, and on the radio.

When the Uber pulled up to the label, I was surprised to see Julian waiting outside. I reached for the backpack I was bringing my computer in and gave him a wave as I climbed out.

“Hi,” I said, offering a smile as he stepped forward on the sidewalk to greet me. People rushed around us--it was a Friday afternoon, and the building we were heading into was sure to be buzzing with weekend-ready people.

“Have you seen the charts?” He asked, turning on his heel to join me as we headed for the door.

“For the song?”

“Yeah--Maggie, it’s number four.”

“Number four?” I asked, my mouth hanging for a second before I picked up my own jaw. It’s not like that song wasn’t any good--I mean, it was a good one. For some reason, though, I hadn’t expected my work to be so well received.

Writing for a big name like One Direction--even when they were getting started--provided a bit of a safety net. We knew they had a fan base. Even if they didn’t last long or if they weren’t a mega-success, there’d be a group of people from the X-Factor crowd that would definitely bring things home.

Bella & Rae--on the other hand--had no platform. They had a following of maybe thirty thousand on social media and most of their distribution before the label was through Soundcloud.

And all of that, more or less, meant that my song was making it, on its own, without the help of a big named star.

“I think it’s gonna be number one, Mags. There’s already been booking requests for Bella & Rae. I think they’re going to get an LP deal. They can’t not.”

Julian and I made our way into the lobby, my head still kind of floating from the news and the energy around us. It was a warm day--warmer for Spring, at least, and I couldn’t help but let my mind drift.

Should I ask Julian why he played the song for Harry? Should I ask him what they said about me? Should I ask him about Harry in general?

“But anyway, I’m meeting you out here because Peter Bouchard wants to meet with you. He really likes the song.”

“Peter Bouchard?” His name was familiar, but I couldn’t quite place it. I didn’t meet with a lot of higher ups, maybe once in a while I’d deal with Mike--the Creative Director who seemed to have a knack for making me want to quit. That was, at least, until I got fired.

“He’s Mike’s boss.”

“Mike’s boss?”

Julian nodded, holding the elevator door open as we stepped inside. “He’s the one who gets to really make the final call about if the girls get an LP--Mike loves it, he’s totally on board.” The doors shut behind us, the elevator dinged to let us know it would fullfil our request to find the 17th floor.

“So why does he want to meet with me?” I asked, shifting my bag from one shoulder to another, suddenly nervous about the possible conversation. I couldn’t handle getting fired again. Twice in the span of twelve months? I’d be forced to move in with my parents just to deal with the emotional turmoil that would ensue.

“Dunno, Maggie, but Mike made it sound like it was good,” he could see the look on my face--the anxiety and the uncertainty that’d be sure to give me early wrinkles.

I didn’t reply. Instead, we stood in silence until the elevator dinged again, it’s doors opening to revolve a much nicer floor than the one with the writing rooms. We stepped off and I followed Julian down a carpeted hall--glass doors peered inside nice offices with dark wood desks and big apple computers.

He finally stopped in front of a door, turning the handle without warning to greet a man that I certainly recognized. He was old enough to be my father--gray hair on top of his head and a smile that seemed to make me only slightly less terrified.

“Maggie, come in, sit down,” he greeted, motioning to a chair opposite his desk. Julian landed in the one beside me, much more comfortable in Peter Bouchard’s presence than I was.

I slid into the seat, offering a small smile as I took inventory of my surroundings. A framed picture of three women--his wife and two daughters, presumably. A shelf of old vinyl lined the wall behind us--Peter was clad in a golf shirt, much less formal than I’d expect for Mike’s boss.

“We’re really glad that the song is having so much success--have you seen any of the numbers?”

I shook my head, looking over to Julian. I’d never seen any numbers for anything. I handed in my work, signed where I needed to, and got decent paychecks via direct deposit. I knew the percent of each song, each download, each album I’d be entitled to. I knew I signed away the rights to my songs when I started working with the label. They’d never really be mine again.

“Here,” Peter said, turning to his computer to open up the internet browser. He clicked open an email, typed in an address, and then shifted the monitor so Julian and I could see. “This is the live number of downloads from BPI. This is streaming numbers, so spotify, iTunes, the like,” he pointed at the screen, his number gracing over tiny zeros that lined up neatly.

“It’s number two now?” Julian asked, leaning forward to get a better look. “Jesus, Mags, even in the last half hour since I saw it it’s changed.”

I couldn’t help but smile--this felt much more personal than anything I’d written for One Direction or even for Harry. I’d written this song alone, it’d been born in my living room and it didn’t have a big name to ride on the coattails of.

Sure, I’d long been of the mindset that it was the writing skills of me and Chelsea and Kyle that really made the band what it had been. Take five good looking kids, slap them with good clothes and good hair, and sure, you’re bound to have some success. But if the music sucked, if the music was the same old simple pop that we’d poured out for the first album, they wouldn’t have lasted the way they did.

But then again, maybe there was a part of me that wondered if that was really true. Because here, in Peter Bouchard’s office, it felt incredibly reassuring to know that I could write good songs--successful songs, really--that did fine enough on their own without the name of the world’s most popular boy band.

“The reason I wanted to meet with you, Maggie, is because we’re interested in buying a back catalog, if you have one.”

If I had one? Of course I had one--of course I had a book of songs and endless iPhone notes of demos with shitty three part harmony done on Garageband on my Mac until I could get into the studio.

“Oh,” I said, letting his words take a second to settle. It was strange--I would have guessed that he’d want to buy a few more, get a little more information about the genre I typically wrote, hear more of my solo work. Instead, he seemed ready to write me a check. “Really?”

Julian let out a laugh, leaning back in his chair as if he were a proud older brother.

“Yes, really,” Peter nodded. “You did amazing things with One Direction and it was rather stupid of us to let you go in November.”

I bit at my lip, feeling a swell of emotion in my chest. He was right--and not in the sense that I was the most amazing thing they’d ever had or ever would, but he was right in the sense that I had a knack for shaping words into a story that floated above the melody.

“Will you at least consider it? Take a look at what you have--demos, finished products, really, and let me know what you think would be an appropriate fee?”

Oh, right, the money. I looked to Julian quickly. I had no idea what he meant. Me come up with the appropriate fee? Me tell them what I wanted them to pay me for my finished songs? Julian nodded in encouragement, so I spit the words out of my mouth.

“Yeah, sure, absolutely.”

Peter stood from his chair and reached his hand out to shake mine. “We’re thrilled, Maggie, really. Thank you for all of your hard work.”

I was sat on my couch, staring at the computer in front of me and the notepad I’d scribbled some numbers on. I had 43 songs that were whole and finished and polished enough to hand over to the label. Out of that number, 25 were actually good enough to be on someone’s album. I didn’t have the slightest clue how to come up with a price for the songs I’d given so much energy. There were the first three songs I’d written when Harry and I started spending time together, one that I wrote when the band broke up, another angry one that had been written sometime after Zayn left.

There were four or five from the summer of 2012 when I briefly dated a boy that Chelsea had introduced me to--stupid and romantic. There were plenty of sad ones--some about being lonely, about being hurt, about making mistakes.

Did I charge a price for each song? Did I add on a percentage I wanted if they got released and distributed on various platforms? I certainly didn’t have the answer, but I was hoping that Harry would. Maybe it was wishful thinking that he’d want to even discuss anything money related, but I figured he at least didn’t want me to get taken advantage of by a big name label.

I typed out a question and erased it three times before finally pressing send.

Do you have a few minutes to talk? The label offered to buy my catalog and I have no clue how to handle the pricing.

I set my phone down on the couch and heated up some food, picking it back up with a bowl of leftover pasta in my hand. Still nothing. I watched an episode of Jane The Virgin and then I finally heard my phone ring.

I pressed the green button and held it up to my ear, trying to calm the heartbeat that was slowly rising in my chest. “Hey,” I said casually, hoping he’d be less boundaried than last time.

“Hi,” his voice was low, I wondered where he was. “What’s up?”

“Not much,” I said quickly, standing from my spot on my couch to move towards the window that overlooked my street.

“So they want to buy your catalog?” He let out a little bit of a laugh, I pulled my head back in offense.

“Are you surprised by that? You sound surprised.”

“M’not surprised, Maggie,” he let out a sigh. “I’m happy for you.”

I cut to the chase, mostly out of fear that going off script would lead to an argument or more chest pain than I was already experiencing. “Well--do you have any idea how I’m supposed to come up with a figure? I mean, Pete Bouchard should know this stuff, right? Shouldn’t they give me a number?”

“You’ve got to up-sell yourself, Maggie. I heard that Paul McCartney sold a catalog once to someone for three or four million.”

“I’m not Paul McCartney,” I reminded him.

“I know--m’saying that you need to not be afraid to ask for what you think it’s worth.”

“I don’t know what it’s worth.”

He let out another sigh, and frankly, I was surprised that he was being as cordial and calm as he was. “How many songs?”

“Forty-three total, out of that, twenty something are decent.”

“M’sure they’re all decent,” he said, I could practically hear him rolling his eyes.

“How do I come up with it though? You’re missing my point altogether,” I accused.

He cleared his throat before replying. “Ten thousand each.”

“Ten thousand each?” I asked, unsure of how he’d even gotten that number.

“Yeah--I mean, if any of them are released it’ll be way more than that. You should ask for at least 10% of the final cuts. Albums, music videos, touring, et cetera.”

I let his words sink in for a second as I watched a couple walk hand in hand on the street below. Charlie, who was sat on the window sill, seemed to be peering up at the phone in my hand. Maybe I was crazy, but I swore it’s because he could recognize Harry’s voice.

“So you think I should walk in and ask Peter Bouchard for four hundred and fifty thousand dollars,” it was more of a statement and less of a question, but he answered me anyway.

“I do.”

“Why ten thousand each?”

He made an unpleasant noise and seemed to draw out my name. “Jesus, Maggie. You asked me to call and I gave you my answer.”

I pulled my head back, turned off by his sudden anger. “I just want to know where you got such a specific number from.”

“My head--I got it from my head.”

I was appreciative of the fact that Harry thought my songs were worth such good money--yet I was fearful that he’d be the only one. Peter Bouchard had no reason to pay me that much as far as I was concerned. Sure, I was in a business where people made a lot of money. In my time with the band I’d made more than the big figure already discussed, but that was over the span of five years.

“Alright, okay. I’ll do ten thousand each.”

“Tell Peter you spoke with me about it,” he said casually, as if that weren’t a big deal.

“What? No, I’m not telling him that.”

“Why not?” He sounded somewhat offended, I could picture the puppy eyes he had on as if I’d said he had a shitty taste in shoes (which he did).

“Because he doesn’t need to know that you and I,” I paused, wondering how on earth to describe what we were and how things were and what this was. “Talk,” I decided.

He let out a sigh, which was followed by an awkward pause as Charlie stretched his back and let out a loud meow.

“Is that Charlie?”

I let out a laugh, looking down at him as he cocked his head to look down at the people passing by. “Who else would it be?”

“How is he?”

I suddenly felt weird. I felt like Harry wasn’t allowed to ask how my cat was if he wouldn’t even have a conversation with me about our fight and our relationship. He didn’t get some type of double standard just because my feline companion had a strange attachment to him.

“He’s fine, but, I should go. I’ve got some stuff to do,” I lied.

“Yeah, okay, of course. Let me know, I guess, how it goes.”

“I will,” I nodded, wondering if he’d answer next time I called.

I met with Peter Bouchard on a Wednesday to discuss the financial compensation, which is the technical term he had used to describe it. It was rainy and cold for a Spring day in London, but Julian met me inside with a cup of tea and a smile on his face. It was all the encouragement I needed to walk into Peter’s office with the confidence to ask for enough money to pay for someone’s entire college education and first home in the state of Ohio.

Peter was friendly and excited that I was willing to make the deal, and he didn’t even flinch when I mentioned the number I had in mind. Maybe he was used to dealing with large sums of money, but he certainly played it cool when he took down more information to write up a contract.

So that night, when I was out to dinner with Kyle and Mark to celebrate, I gushed on and on about how I’d actually handled it all by myself (minus the input from Harry). I’d made a business deal, been responsible, and now was getting adequate compensation for something that I’d worked so hard on.

Bella & Rae’s song had been number one for a week straight, I’d already received a paycheck from that, so dinner, tonight, was on me.

“So what will be the next step? Can they sell your songs to anyone?” Kyle asked, picking up his wine glass to watch the legs drip down the side of the glass.

I was appreciative and grateful that kyle was happy for me--not that he wouldn’t be, but I did wonder if he’d feel strange that the label had brought me back and offered this deal. It wasn’t necessarily a stable gig, I certainly wasn’t a staff writer for them, but the money from my catalog would certainly hold me over for a while.

“Anyone signed to the label can record my songs,” I corrected. “Technically they own the rights and the royalties, but Peter said he’d work on a percentage of what I’d get from additional revenue--so tours, albums, stuff like that.”

Mark tilted his head to the side and let out a laugh. “Sweet deal, mate. Depending on how many they use, you’ll make money off of it for a long time.”

I nodded, taking a sip at my own drink. A pang of guilt hit me in the stomach--was I focusing too much on the financial aspect of this, exactly like Harry had accused?

I could understand his fear of me being with him for the wrong reasons, but that didn’t invalidate my need to be financially secure and responsible.

“You’re doing that thing,” Kyle laughed, reaching over to snap his fingers in front of my face. Mark reached for a piece of bruschetta and plopped it into his mouth. “Where you zone out and think about Harry.”

I rolled my eyes, thankful for the noise and the energy in the restaurant. We were only a few blocks from Kyle and Mark’s place--my uber ride home would be a good chance to call my mom.

“I’m not thinking about Harry,” I told them, waving a hand to dismiss his silly allegation.

As if on cue, my phone lit up on the table between us. It was face up, so there was no way to hide the name on the screen as a text message rolled in.

I looked down at it, then back up at them, both of whom were keeping their lips sealed together to avoid a smile. I reached for it before they could say anything, ignoring Kyle’s lazy attempt to small talk about the weather.

We’re having a wrap party for my album on Friday if you want to come.

I didn’t want to sound desperate or too eager, so I thumbed back a response slowly.

What time? I’m meeting with Julian that day.

It was a lie, but I doubted that Julian would out me if Harry ever mentioned it. I looked back up to my dinner dates, who were both munching on another bite of our appetizers.

“Things seem to be a little less hostile,” Kyle said with a smirk, bringing his wine glass up to his lips.

“Nothing’s happening,” I shook my head, still holding my phone in front of me. “He’s literally telling me something about his album. Relax.”

My phone buzzed again.

8pm. Hopefully I’ll see you there.

It wasn’t the fact that Chelsea had taken entirely too long to get ready for the party--it was more about the fact that now she was insisting on getting one more glass of champagne before we made our way over to the food.

She’d been in town for two nights so far, and she had me out and about all day doing the things she said she missed most about London (which, mostly, was just shopping at High Street shops). We’d had lunch and tea in the afternoon but that was four whole hours ago, and after trekking all over Mayfair, I was either about to throw up, or pass out. Both of which from lack of sufficient sustenance.

Pair that with the sweating that was occuring due to the proximity to Harry, and I was nothing less of a hot mess.

“There’ll be another waiter in one second,” Chelsea said quietly, completely annoyed by the way I was fanning myself.

“Just meet me over there,” I said, raising my hands in exasperation, stomping away and over towards the delicious table of finely placed miniature meatballs and fruit.

It wasn’t much of a selection, but I was starving and we weren’t likely getting a real meal any time soon--this seemed like more of a cocktail hour type of event.

I hadn’t even said hello to Harry. I saw Jeffrey first when we came in--he gave me a big hug and thanked me for coming. He greeted Chelsea and then brought me over to see Ryan and Tyler. I was grateful that things didn’t feel as weird as I’d expected, but I hadn’t yet seen everyone.

Chelsea, up until momentarily, had fulfilled her obligation of being my date. She stayed by my side and made small talk with people we didn’t know. She was the Queen of Humble Bragging about my catalog being sold to the label, which I think impressed Jeff Bhasker quite a bit.

Now, however, her heart was set on more alcohol and my stomach was set on food.

I forked four mini meatballs onto my plate and had just forked one into my mouth when I turned around and walked into Harry’s back.

“Hi!” I said, covering my mouth with my hand as I tried to swallow quickly. “Sorry--chewing.”

He let out a laugh and didn’t seem as angry as I’d expected. He was fine enough on the phone, but something told me that seeing him in person (without the barrier of technology) would be a whole different ball game.

“It’s good to see you,” he nodded, waiting for me to remove my hand from my mouth before moving in to give me an awkward side hug. “Thanks for coming.”

“Thanks for--” I paused, unsure of how find the right words. “Inviting me?”

“Thanks for writing on the album,” he shrugged slightly, clearly running out of ways to make this as normal as possible.

The truth of the matter was that Harry and I had a lot of unfinished business. There were things that needed to be said and addressed and right now certainly wasn’t the time to do that. Chelsea sauntered up next to us, champagne flute in her hand, and held her glass up to clink against the one in Harry’s hand.

“Cheers, mate, to a great album. Haven’t heard it yet, but if Maggie wrote on it, I’m sure it’ll be fantastic.”

I rolled my eyes--but Harry found her toast amusing. He laughed and nodded in Chelsea’s direction. “She’s a great wingwoman, huh?”

“She’s something,” I tried to act as if I wasn’t completely overstimulated by the alcohol I’d drank, the noise in the restaurant, and the lack of food I’d eaten.

I didn’t have a chance, though, to plan my next move, because Peter Bouchard was suddenly in front of us and reaching an arm around Harry’s shoulders.

“You didn’t tell me just how involved you were on Harry’s album, Maggie,” Peter said, his head tilted in a way that communicated his affection towards the both of us.

I hadn’t told Peter much about Harry’s album or my involvement with it, because, frankly, I didn’t know if Harry would cut out every song I’d written on when I left Jamaica. I kind of imagined that he’d find new songs, suddenly grow to hate the ones I’d been a part of. I hadn’t yet seen the track listing, however--I did my best to keep my distance.

“She was very involved,” Harry said with a nod, his smile somewhat solemn as he looked from Peter to me. “She’s very talented. You’re lucky to work with her.”

I could feel heat rise to my cheeks, feeling extremely uncomfortable with the attention on me at someone else’s album wrap party.

“Well, Harry’s a great guy, Maggie. Really went to bat for you in terms of payment for your catalog.”

The room seemed to freeze and suddenly my feet felt glued to the floor. “What?”

Harry’s eyes--which had been watching Peter as he spoke--were now as big as silver dollars. His lips parted as if he wanted to speak, but couldn’t find the words.

Chelsea took a swig of her champagne and looked on in pure shock.

“He wanted to make sure you got the money you deserved. And the catalog is amazing, really. We’re very excited to see who will be the right fit for each song.”

Peter, whose intentions were pure, didn’t understand that he needed to just stop talking. Harry, whose eyes were still wide and whose lips were still parted, seemed to teeter on his feet.

I looked up at him, thankful that Chelsea had stepped right in front of me to compliment Peter’s choice of suit, and turned to head for the door.

There was no use--for some reason Harry and I would never be on the same page. I was a Monday and he was a Friday. No matter how many times the sun would rise and set, we’d be on opposite ends of the week. We’d be the same number of days apart, the same number of sleeps between us.

Because if he wasn’t mad at me, I was mad at him. If he wanted to be with me, I didn’t want to be with him. And if we were finally brave enough to stop avoiding each other like the plague, something always came in between.

#come sunday #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles story #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles fiction #harry styles fic #harry styles blurb

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my-sweet-pea · 6 years

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Do you take requests? If so could you write something with sp? Something similiar to the brooke/julian scene in one tree hill. Reader is dancing around in a store because her favourite song comes on and Sweet Pea walks in and he's totally fascinated by her despite her being a northsider and it's all cute and all?

First request!! Thanks so much for sending this in. I hope that a dancing scene in Pop’s isn’t too lame after the Josie/Chuck scene in the last episode, but I couldn’t think of other stores this could take place in.

Dance Like No One Is Watching

The hardest thing about working the night shift was preventing the rush of boredom that usually comes rolling in after 1:00 AM. Fewer and fewer customers arrive, and there’s always less to do with every passing minute.

It was a Wednesday night in Riverdale, and most of the usual late night cl had already stopped by. I had made it to 2:17 AM, and I was counting down the minutes until freedom. Sammy started her shift at 3:00 AM, so I didn’t have to scrub the same spot on the counter for much longer.

I loved working at Pop Tate’s. I’d worked there for two years now, and it was an easy enough gig with good enough pay. Since it was open 24 hours, I was able to work around my school hours fairly easily. The 7:00 PM to 3:00 AM shift worked well with my homework and sleep schedule, allowing me to just barely get four hours of sleep during the school week. I was always tired, but at least I made good money.

The silence of the shop could be eerie at times, especially at night when it was impossible to see what lay past the parking lot in the dark. When there were no customers, I liked to blast my favourite songs and dance while I cleaned and re-cleaned every surface.

Tonight was no different. My music blared through the audio system. I had a lot of different music in this playlist, but suddenly I heard the iconic opening notes of “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)“ by Eurythmic.

I gave a shriek of delight, leaping down from the stool I had been slouching in. I grabbed my spray bottle of cleaning solution and began to dance like an idiot down the length of the bar counter, scrubbing and dancing at the same time. I kicked my leg high into the air, bobbing my head in different directions. I never cared what my dancing looked like when I was having a blast.

Little did I know at the time that someone stood outside, watching me dance in awe to the muffled music which could be heard all the way in the parking lot.

I danced to the entire song, infusing each second with high energy kicks, arm movements, and leaps through the shop. As the final note sounded, I was on the floor, breathing heavily. Over my panting, I heard clapping. My head jerked up at the sound, eyes wide in horror. Was Sammy early?

No, it was so much worse than that.

A very tall boy with tanned skin, dark brown eyes, and black hair was clapping sardonically in the entrance. He wore a black leather jacket over a blue plaid flannel and a white tee, accompanied by jeans that were faded and worn in all the right places. His silky hair curled around the collar of the jacket and fell across his forehead. He was the most gorgeous human being I had ever seen.

I couldn’t manage to get off of the floor. I stared from my kneeling position, still breathing heavily, trying to understand why this glorious man was standing in Pop’s at almost 2:30 AM. He strolled towards me, sticking his hands in his pockets.

“That was amazing,” he said in a very sincere sounding voice. “I’ve never seen anyone dance like that. You really take that whole ‘dance like no one is watching thing’ to heart, huh?” He smirked at me, a sparkle in his dark eyes.

He reached out a hand towards me. I stared at the proffered hand for a moment before grasping it and allowing him to help me upright. His hand was large and warm in my grip, and it felt like I held his hand forever as I stood. I tried to quickly drop his hand once I was safely on my own two feet, but he held on.

“Thanks, I think,” I said, my voice cracking slightly. I was staring at our conjoined hands, waiting for him to drop my hand.

He shook the hand still clasped in his. “You are quite welcome. My name is Sweet Pea.”

I blinked once, trying hard not to react visibly and insult his name. I smiled up at him, offering my name in response.

Sweet Pea dropped my hand and looked me over from head to toe. I knew I didn’t look my best in my end-of-the-night uniform, especially after my incredibly embarrassing dance session. I shifted uncomfortably.

He grinned, seeming pleased that his gaze had rattled me.

“So tell me, where did a beautiful girl like you learn to dance?”

“Umm well I’ve never taken lessons, but I’m sure you could tell that depending on how long you were watching,” I responded dryly.

“I think I saw from the very beginning until the very end,” he said slowly, “but if you want to start the last song over again and show me the whole routine from start to finish, I’ll know for sure.”

Oh no… I wanted to sink into the floor and stay there permanently. I could feel the blood rushing to my face as I blushed. My hands moved to cover my cheeks.

“Wow, I don’t think I can hate myself more than I do right now.”

The twisted smirk on his face dropped immediately, followed by a look of concern. He reached out and put a hand on my shoulder.

“Hey, no, please. I genuinely thought it was amazing. You looked so adorable and full of life. You don’t need to be embarrassed.”

I peeked through my fingers up at him. He looked sincere. I laughed slightly.

“I don’t know if I can agree with your taste in dancing, but I do appreciate it.” Both of us dropped our hands down to our sides again.

We had talked through an entire song, the next song starting at a louder volume and startling both of us. He looked around the empty diner, his eyes coming back to rest on me.

“Wanna dance some more?” he asked with a boyish grin.

I considered his offer. He had already seen me at my absolute worst. I might as well just have fun with it now.

“Why not?”

We danced through the next 3 songs before I collapsed into a booth, panting heavily. I was too out of shape for this.

Sweet Pea collapsed onto the bench across from me, panting and laughing at my reddened face. He shook his head thoughtfully, chest still heaving.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had this much fun before. Especially not at this time in the morning and in a completely legal way.”

I leaned on the table, still trying to catch my breath. “I know for a fact that I haven’t.” I smiled at him, thankful and happy and just having fun.

He just stared at me for a moment, looking a little lost.

“What’s wrong?” I was concerned that he was going to pass out on me after that crazy dance party. There was no way in hell I could keep him from crashing to the floor if that was the case.

He shook his head to clear it and smirked. “Nothing’s wrong.”

We sat there, smiling at each other like idiots for what must have been a couple of minutes. My heart rate was coming down but I found myself feeling just as flushed as before as he gazed at me, our faces a foot away from each other across the table.

He cleared his throat finally. “So, how long have you worked here?”

“Around two years. It’s fun.”

Surprise flitted across his face. “Years?” he repeated.

I frowned in confusion. “Yeah, years. Why?”

He shrugged. “Just surprised I never met you before is all. I don’t come here that often but if I do, it’s usually at night when there are fewer Nor-people to stare at me.”

I blinked, realizing what he meant. I had spotted the serpent tattoo on his neck almost right away and I was trying my hardest not to stare at it or acknowledge to myself what it inevitably meant. As we had whirled around Pop’s, dancing together, I had managed to almost forget that this boy was a South Side Serpent.

I had heard a lot about the Serpents growing up. I had always lived on the North side of Riverdale, and while I was always reminded of the many privileges which came with it, I had never really understood the actual struggle that the Southside residents experienced until the whole mess with Jason Blossom. That event showed me a lot about the Serpents and the south side’s dynamics. I had read Jughead and Betty’s articles about the topic as they were published, learning more about how the Serpents were and were not involved. I had met many different Serpents before, including FP Jones. The Serpents would occasionally come to Pop’s, though what Sweet Pea said about Northsiders staring was very true, and most Serpents didn’t want to deal with the animosity when it would inevitably end with them getting in trouble for something.

I found myself nodding sympathetically. Of all the people who could have found me dancing like an idiot, I was glad that it had been Sweet Pea. He made me feel fun and exciting instead of embarrassing me.

“Well, I just started this particular shift when school started back up. I was working days before that. And I can understand why you wouldn’t want to come during the day. Some people in this town seem convinced that human decency and logic are horrifying things.” I smiled at Sweet Pea, leaning further across the table to tentatively reach for his hand.

His hand jumped back, away from mine. I froze, feeling unsure and awkward before trying to beat a hasty retreat back to my side of the table. I could feel my cheeks filling with blood in embarrassment.

Of course he isn’t going to let you hold his hand, idiot. He’s a badass Serpent and you’re…a waitress at Pop’s who hops around like an idiot when you think you’re alone, I berated myself, twisting my fingers together awkwardly.

“Sorry, I just-you just startled me,” he said after a second. “If someone is reaching towards me, it is very rarely a positive thing.”

I blinked like an idiot. “Oh. Right. I didn’t mean-”

“No, I know. I’m just an idiot. Surprised me is all.”

He reached out for my hand, smiling at me in a very gentle way. I tentatively reached out again, letting his warm, calloused fingers envelope mine.

We sat there for a couple minutes without saying anything. The silence was comfortable between us. We were both watching the other’s face closely as we held onto each other.

Surprisingly, I felt extremely drawn to the Serpent. I don’t think any of my friends would have ever expected me to meet and actually connect with a Serpent. My friends and I weren’t exactly close-minded, but we didn’t go out of our way to meet people from different backgrounds. We were all pretty comfortable just sticking to what we knew, especially since we had all met each other in kindergarten and had just kind of stuck together throughout the rest of our schooling. Proximity and social circles were the definite predictors for whether someone would become our friend.

Sweet Pea broke the silence with a chuckle. “If my friends say we might now, I have no idea what they would say.”

“I was just thinking the same thing! They would probably be so confused how we even connected, especially if I told them that it was because you saw me dancing.”

Sweet Pea raised his eyebrow quizzically.

“They all hate my dancing,” I admitted, laughing.

“Well, I certainly enjoyed it. A lot. You’re not half bad for a Northsider.”

I rolled my eyes in an extremely exaggerated manner. “Says the guy who broke down and danced with me. Your reputation as a badass may be called into question if anyone hears about that.” I grinned mischievously.

“You wouldn’t dare!” Sweet Pea hollered, dropping my hand in fake outrage.

“Don’t mess with me or I just might!” I said, snootily raising my nose and crossing my arms before breaking into a huge grin.

Suddenly the bell over the door rang out. Sammy walked in, already chattering about to me about how awful her day had been and how she just needed a milkshake to make the world right again. I watched her in loving amusement. She always arrives like a whirlwind, leaving traces of her perfume and the echo of her boisterous voice behind her wherever she goes. I loved her like she was a member of my family. The age difference made her more like an oddball older aunt to me. She was a single mother in her mid-thirties with two adorable kids.

I turned to see how Sweet Pea was taking Sammy’s entrance. He was smirking at her slightly, not I could tell he wasn’t judging her.

Sammy finally looked up from trying to unsuccessfully unbutton her coat. “This DAMN coat al-” she froze, noticing the additional presence in the room. “Why, hello there, my lovely Serpent friend. You’re early tonight!”

I looked between them, slightly surprised. Based on the small number of people who came in after 1 AM, I had assumed Sweet Pea just hadn’t been in since school started. I guess he usually comes in after 3 AM instead.

“Hey, Sammy. How are the kids?” Sweet Pea asked, lounging back in his booth.

“Those little ankle-biters are pure perfection and evil in one beautiful package, and don’t pretend like you don’t know it!”

Sammy managed to finally get her coat unbuttoned and she fell into the booth beside me with a sigh.

“Now I suppose I have to pull out the protective momma speech and warn you that this boy here is just looking for trouble, right?” she said in her fake stern voice, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.

I bit my lip to keep from laughing out loud. “I don’t think Sweet Pea knows what trouble is. Look at that face.”

I was joking around with Sammy, but I also knew that Sweet Pea was watching us closely. I didn’t want Sammy’s attitude to scare him off.

Sammy snorted derisively. “And my left butt cheek is made of diamond encrusted gold.”

She stood in a whirl and rushed to the back of the kitchen to prepare for her shift. I stood reluctantly. I didn’t want to stop talking to Sweet Pea.

“I have to finish up here so Sammy can get started.”

Sweet Pea looked up at me from his spot in the booth. “Wanna ride home, Northsider?”

I felt my stomach leap at his words. I swallowed and tried not to look as excited as I felt.

“That would be really great if you don’t mind?”

“Not at all. I wouldn’t want you walking home alone at this time of day, especially with the Black Hood roaming the Northside of town.”

I gulped. I always tried not to think about the danger I put myself in every night. I knew the Black Hood was targeting Northsiders, and I bet he knew tons of details about all of our lives. With a quick nod of thanks, I turned and rushed after Sammy.

—————

When I came back from the kitchen 5 minutes later, Sweet Pea was in the same spot, staring out the window. I watched him for a moment, studying his profile. He looked tired more than anything else.

“You ready to go?” he asked, turning towards me with a knowing grin.

Embarrassed at being caught watching him, I bit my lip. “Yeah, of course. Thanks again.”

He stood and held out a hand for my bag. I gave it to him and shyly followed him out the door.

Sammy’s words to me when we were in the privacy of the kitchen ran through my head. I had asked her what her opinion of Sweet Pea was and she had responded with a warning.

“Sweetie, he’s a good boy. He’s a Serpent and he would die for them, but I know he would die for anyone he loves. Just be careful. I don’t want either of you to get hurt.”

I watched the back of Sweet Pea’s neck as he walked down the step before me. I could see the muscles in his neck working as he turned to look at the sleek black motorcycle resting in the corner of the parking lot.

I almost walked into his chest when he suddenly stopped and turned to me.

“Are you good on a motorcycle?”

I shrugged. “Won’t know unless I try!”

He eyed me as a small smile twisted his lips. “Good to know. Let’s get you home.”

I buckled the helmet and held on tightly to Sweet Pea’s waist, heart in my throat. I couldn’t stop now; I had to know him. And if I found a guy who actually liked my dancing as much as Sweet Pea, I needed to hang on to him.

Let me know what you think! First time trying to write a one-shot, and I didn’t get to go back and really edit.

#sweet pea #sweet pea riverdale #riverdale #sweet pea imagine #sweet pea x reader #pop's chock'lit shoppe

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momentsinsong · 4 years

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Moments In Song No. 024 - José Vigo

The songs and artists that get you through periods of transition end up staying with you for a lifetime. From navigating American culture as the child of immigrants, to developing his style as an artist, José has used music to help make sense of the transitions in his life. With a playlist featuring songs from different corners of the world, the Venezuelan born visual artist tells us about his favorite TV soundtracks, his admiration for Mac Miller, and more.

Listen to Jose’s playlist on Apple Music and Spotify.

Words and photos by Julian.

Julian: What was the thought process behind making your playlist. I see you have two little sheets of paper with a list of songs on them.

José: As soon as you asked me to be a part of this, I knew exactly who I wanted to be on the playlist and what songs of theirs I wanted to pick. I picked the songs that have been holding me down the past fews months during this chaotic ass summer and spring. So I had like 20 people and I narrowed it down by picking the songs that I listen to on the way to work. I just bought a new bike so I’ve been cruising on the bike and listening to the songs. I made sure to put shit from when I want to listen to rap, when I want to listen to some other shit, when I want to listen to Latino music,

What songs from the jump did you know have to be on there.

Definitely Anderson .Paak “Room in Here.” I couldn't make a playlist and justify it without putting Hov in it, so I picked my favorite Hov song “Feelin’ It.” Definitely needed to put Mac in here. That was hard because I fuck with so many Mac songs, but “Hurt Feelings” was my favorite one from “Swimming’ and it kind of fit perfectly with “Feelin’ It” and Frank Ocean.

I don’t know if you did this intentionally but your playlist transitioned really well from song to song.

For sure. It was definitely intentional.

I listened to it all the through and was like, “Man this is really flowing. It sounds like he took his time with this.”

At first I was like, “He doesn’t want me to pick my 10 favorite songs, he wants me to pick a playlist of 10 songs that I really fuck with. Let me make sure it has a structure and flows well.”

How’d you get into a lot of the foreign songs on your playlist?

My cousin Diego put me on to Flavien Berger, and then with the Japanese joint, my roommate is a tattoo artist and one of his coworkers was like, “You need to listen to this band.” So the second my roommate heard it he was like, “Yo I got to tell Jose.” As soon as I heard it I thought it was crazy. I grew up listening to cumbia music my whole life, my family is Colombian. Hearing Japanese vocals to it was so fucking cool and refreshing. It doesn’t sound like these guys are biting it and making it terrible. It all just sounds so good together.

Is that their only song that sounds like that?

Their first album is called “Echos from Japan” and it’s got cumbia samples, reggae samples. The reggae song samples Sister Nancy. You should listen to that one, it’s so cool. And of course I had to get Bad Bunny in there.

What’s crazy about that one is I saw the name Bad Bunny and I had one expectation of what to hear…

That boricua shit, but it’s so Mexican!

Yeah because I didn’t know the other artist, but saw Bad Bunny and thought it would be some turn up party stuff, or even just something with the Reggaeton beat to it. So I was listening to it and thought, “Oh this is cool,” and waiting for the drums to hit and they never came in.

They never came in! [Laughs]. It’s straight Mexican shit. Natanael Cano is Mexican. But also Bad Bunny’s verse is so hard. I can show the song to my American friends and they can say, “Oh that sounds cool,” but you understand Spanish and can understand his verse and realize those were bars.

Have you always had such a wide taste in music?

For sure. You know growing up Latino, in your house you have your parents playing music from where they originate from, so I’m listening to Cumbia, Salsa, Merengue. But as soon as I left my house I’m listening to Hov, Hip-Hop, you know Black American music.

So you start with the Latino music at home, and then move on to more Hip-Hop once you’re outside the house. How did you end up listening to music outside of those genres?

Definitely art. Art opened my mind, and as soon as I got a little older I discovered that everyone makes good music you just gotta find it. Watching shows and movies with really great playlists introduced me to a whole bunch of new music. “High Fidelity” has a great soundtrack. “Insecure” has a bomb ass soundtrack. “I May Destroy You” has a sick soundtrack. You hear a bunch of great British artists on there, it’s tight. Even video games have really good playlists. 2K, Tony Hawk.

How’d you begin making art?

I began as a kid. I’ve been making art as long as I can remember. My mom would just buy me art supplies. She would buy me some toys that I asked for but mostly she bought me art stuff. I remember in elementary school, we would have competitions on who could draw the best car, plane, truck or whatever and I would win all the time. It gave me confidence growing up. I knew I had something that I was good at.

How would you describe your style of art? Are there certain themes or topics you try to cover in your work?

I never really know how to describe my art, it’s very influenced by Baltimore, skateboarding, music, & graffiti. I spent a lot of time painting letters so nowadays I try to draw other things. I like to draw the people I see on my commute to work, on my bike rides. Faces are so interesting. I really like the pattern work I’ve been doing where I’m filling space with objects, landscapes, things I reminisce about.

What’s the relationship between your art and music? Do you get influenced by music when making art? Are there specific songs or artists you listen to help get you in the mindset of making art?

Anderson .Paak is a big one. His music is really influential. It puts me in the vibe of wanting to paint and draw. It’s also inspiring and makes me want to finish something by the end of the day. Mac is definitely another one. I can listen to “Watching Movies with the Sound Off,” “GOOD A.M.,” “Swimming,” I can listen to all of those albums all the way through while I’m sitting there painting, drawing, making a collage.

What specifically about those albums and Mac Miller as an artist inspires you?

I guess because we’re around the same age. When he started making music, I started painting graffiti. He was dropping albums, and my graffiti got better. He changed his style of music, and around the same time I stopped painting graffiti and became a visual artist through “fine art.” Also his drug use equates to mine, not saying I was ever an addict, but I definitely experimented with drugs I maybe wouldn't want my kids experiencing. I feel like his development as an artist was similar to mine, even though I’m not as talented. I don’t think I can paint as well as Mac Miller makes music [Laughs]. Same thing with Anderson .Paak. He was just working, working, working, hard as shit and then finally “Venice” went crazy, “Malibu” catapulted him, and now people know who he is.

Was there a specific moment or artist that pushed you to start developing your own taste in music?

Definitely me being a little kid and listening to all of this Latino music, and knowing that I liked it but also knowing that this is what my parents are listen to. You know when you’re 11 or 12 you don't want to be listening to what your parents are listening to. Even though Héctor Lavoe bangs, let me listen to something else. So growing up in America, as soon as I could understand English and rappers well enough to comprehend what they’re saying, that’s what I would be listening to. Rappers like Nas, Hov, Kanye’s “College Dropout,” “Late Registration.” “College Dropout” came out when I was in 7th grade and was one of the first albums I bought. As I kid I was like, “I got this, I bought this.”

Where were you born?

I was born in Venezuela. I was born in Caracas and came to the United States when I was 10 in 2001. Which was an awkward time to be a new brown person.

Yeah very awkward. Would you say music, specifically Rap music, helped you with that transition into America? Like with the American culture and the English language?

Yeah for sure, because I was trying to fit in and there was a bunch of shit I didn’t like, but as soon as I heard Rap I was like, “Oh this is it! I fucking love this. This needs to be slowed down so I can understand their words better.” You know when you’re a kid you absorb information quickly. I got here when I was 10, by the time I was 11 I was already speaking English, and by the time I was 12/13 I could comprehend English well enough where I could understand what these rappers were saying. So Hip-Hop definitely helped me mingle and become part of America. Skateboarding too. Skateboarding gave me a lot of confidence. Art too.

When you were listening to that stuff were your parents ever like, “What is this?”

No actually I was never really censored. I had immigrant parents, so my mom was working 15 hours, my pops was working 18 hours. As soon as I started having all this music available to me, my parents were always working, I had no parental supervision. I got out of school at 2:00, and my parents didn’t get home until like 9:30,10:00 so they didn’t know what I was listening to. I was watching whatever I wanted, I was listening to whatever I wanted, so my parents weren’t aware of what I was listening to. Even if they were involved, they couldn’t understand what these rappers were saying. My parents don’t speak English.

I’ve heard from other people’s stories that when they play certain stuff around their parents they’re like, “What is this? What are you listening to?” But I know with my mom when she came to America she was very much into American music and would listen to those Top 40 radio stations in the car. So when me and my brother started listening to that stuff she was never really against it. It was really cool but I know that’s not the same experience for all children of immigrants.

Especially Latinos who have a Catholic background, our parents are somewhat conservative. My mom listened to Salsa, Cumbia, Merengue, Folk, Campesino Venezuelan/Colombian music. She actually really fucked with Michael Jackson. Kenny G, she likes Kenny G for some fucking reason. And them my pops, R.I.P., he listened to Tongo, spoken word with the saxophone, stuff like that.

Yeah I feel like that's a big way for them to remember where they came from and to keep that connection when they arrive to a new place. Did your perception of that music change over time? Because when you’re younger that’s just what you listen to because it’s there, but then you get to a certain age and you don’t want to listen to what you’re parents are listening to, and then I think there’s a stage after that where you just appreciate it a little more.

For sure. You go back and and want to take a break from what you’re listening to all the time, and like, “Damn bro, Héctor Lavoe really bangs.” Héctor Lavoe is one of my favorite singers of all time. If you listen to his lyrics, he’s amazing.

I’m not super familiar with him…

Héctor Lavoe is a Puerto Rican Salsa singer. He had a very shitty life, but he was an amazing singer. Definitely one of the most successful, well-known Latino Salsa singers.

Is that appreciation for him something that came later in life?

I knew he was really good as a kid, but at the same time I was like, “This is what you listen to mom. I didn’t grow up like you. I’m an immigrant in America, I want to listen to American music.” At the time when I was 13 I didn't want to resonate with it because I wanted to be here (in America) and not looked at as different. But as I got older I realized that I have to appreciate that I’m different, because this is important. My words and my experiences are important, and the music that I listen to, and that my parents listen to is important. It’s not weird, it's important.

Yeah as a kid, I didn’t really like that stuff, but now that I’m older it’s come full circle and I appreciate it more.

You know what’s one artist for sure? Oscar D'León. He’s a Venezuelan artist that a lot of Venezuelans and Colombians love. That’s music that I didn’t want to listen to as a kid. I thought it was my parents' generation of what to listen to in Venezuela and Colombia, and not something I really wanted to listen to. But now I’m like, “Man this is beautiful! These drums, this trumpet kills it. Oscar D'León’s lyrics are amazing. I really appreciate it now, and am glad that I have memories of getting woken up to it at 7:00 in the morning with my mom and her vacuum.

As you grow older, you kind of learn to have that balance between recognizing where you come from and celebrating that, but also having your own thing.

Yeah I think as you get older you realize that your parents weren’t so old. Like when you’re 13 and you hear someone say they’re 30 you think, “Damn you’re old.” But 30’s not old. I’m 29 about to be 30 in February, and I’m super looking forward to being 30. Like my 30’s are gonna rock. I remember being a little kid and my mom was in her early 40’s and thinking that this is music that old people listen to, and it wasn’t. It was just music she listened to when she was young and it aged very well. I was just 13 and didn’t understand it.

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5hfanfiction · 7 years

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(Camila/You) - Phantasm - Chapter 9

In all honesty, I felt nervous about attending the People’s Choice Awards. To everyone else, this was just one of the many award’s show I’ve attended, when in reality, this was my first. The last few days have been insane and I haven’t settled down ever since I came back to LA. The moment I landed, an older man in a crisp suit walked up to me and began listing off things in his ‘itinerary’ as he called it. It took me a while to realize he was probably my manager.

I could only understand a third of what he was saying but I didn’t let him repeat himself because he was being too chatty and I just wanted some peace and quiet. However, he did make me go to numerous events and parties in different cities that I began growing exhausted.

More importantly, it meant I couldn’t come to the girls’ recording sessions.

It’s been three days since recordings started again and Julian has called me up quite a few times already, asking me when I’d get back. I would probably get back after the PCA’s but I wasn’t really looking forward to it. Mainly because after the talk I had with Camila that New Year’s day, I had no idea how to face her now. I mean I told her all those things about moving on but to be completely honest, my heart was still a hundred percent invested in her.

“Well you look thoughtful.”

I looked down and saw Phantasm smiling. Leaning forward, I called out to the people on the front seat.

“I’m gonna take a call.”

My bodyguard nodded and turned down the radio. I raised my phone until Phantasm and I were face to face. “Thoughtful yes. But more nervous actually.”

After talking with Camila, I decided to apologize to Phantasm as well. I was hard on her before and I knew that in the end, she was only trying to help. She readily forgave me, saying that she can only imagine how hard it was for me to lose a first love.

Then after, proceeding to call me a love deficient cactus again.

“Are you sure you wanna go? I can do something if you’re bothered, you know,” she offered.

“No, it’s okay. I’d have to do these kinda things from now on so I need to get used to them.”

“Is that the real reason you want to go to the show?” she asked, her brow raising.

I chuckled and smiled. “Yeah… I don’t know if I can face Camila right now. Julian told me the girls weren’t coming to the PCA so that’s something in my favor.”

“How long do you plan on avoiding Camila?”

“Just… as long as I can.”

I wanted to face her confidently, like nothing happened. Because I was the one who told her that I would get over her because I didn’t want to bother her anymore. If she sees me depressed, she’s just gonna worry about me and that’s the last thing I want. Because if she even shows me a glimmer of care or love, my feelings would undoubtedly rush back all at once.

“We’re here,” I heard my bodyguard say.

I looked out the window and saw hundreds of paparazzi huddled behind a wall, scurrying their way to the front just to get a good picture of various celebrities. The people on the red carpet were probably huge stars that I should know the name of but I’ve never really followed any celebrities during my old life and certainly not now. I was mulling over the thought of wishing for some celebrity knowledge when my bodyguard opened the door and motioned for me to come down.

The roar of the crowd was deafening and I had a hard time looking straight at the source because the moment I put a foot down, all cameras were trained on me. At first, I shielded my eyes from the lights but then again realized that celebrities did not hide their faces. A woman with a headset who looked like she had been awake since three am and going on coffee fuel approached me and moved me to one end of the carpet. “I have Y/N L/N, waiting for your cue,” she said into a walkie talkie. “Copy that, ready in ten seconds,” I heard someone reply.

True enough after ten seconds, the woman pushed me unto the carpet and camera flashes started turning in my direction. I was trying so hard to look normal but I had to squint a little in order to even see the paparazzi’s faces. Someone began shouting my name and I instinctively turned in that direction only to be met by another bright light. God, how did these celebrities do this without getting blinded?

Fortunately, the woman must’ve noticed me at a loss so she walked up to my side and told me to walk towards the middle of the carpet. By then, my eyes started getting used to the lights and I was comfortable staring at them head on. I looked beside me and saw a woman posing and smiling for the cameras. I did the same minus the posing part and just let my arms rest on my sides.

After a few more stops and a few more smiles, I finally reached the other end of the carpet and made my way inside the venue. My bodyguards immediately flocked beside me and began leading me to my seat. My seat was on the third row from the front. Thank god because if I was in front I would be awkward the whole show. Some people talked to me as soon as I sat down and I tried keeping up with the conversation even if I didn’t know who they were.

Soon enough, the lights dimmed and the first performance of the night started. A tall, blonde woman started singing to the tune of a song I wrote before. Checking google real quick I realized that I gave the song to a band and that this woman was the host of tonight, Jane Lynch. It was quite fun and I found myself smiling as she listed off celebrities.

She was having a monologue and she was really funny, I must say. It’s only the opening and I’m already happy I chose to come here. Smiling and laughing was something I missed doing. Soon enough Jane began talking about musical performances. I knew who Jason Derulo was but I didn’t know who the second guy was, I’ve not heard of him yet. But it was the last one that I did not expect.

Shawn Mendes.

It was such a long time since I heard that name. He was just another reminder of someone I lost, someone I’m trying to forget. Then at that point my mind began to wander, would Shawn start coming on to Camila now? They really were good friends and he was the first one she wrote a song with. Looking back at it now, they really were good for each other. I shook the thought out of my mind. No Camila tonight, it’s just me having fun.

Finally, the awards show continued and presenters started giving out awards.

And of course Shawn Mendes won something. It’s like the world telling me that Shawn would actually be good for Camila if I just finally let her go.

That thought didn’t stop me from getting a drink backstage during commercial though. A few more people talked to me but I was only about fifty percent present. As the show continued, I began being more comfortable until the first performer was announced. I wasn’t that much into it, debating whether I should excuse myself and get another drink backstage but something the presenter said stopped me.

“…performing a medley of his smash hits with special guest Camila Cabello, here is Shawn Mendes.”

My heart dropped at that moment. Shawn began his song but it was muffled in my ears, like I was a thousand miles away. This can’t be real, I’m not ready. I can’t see Camila yet I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to say. I clutched my phone and closed my eyes. I could easily wish myself out of here. I could just tell Phantasm what’s happening and I’ll be out of here even before Camila comes out.

But there was curiosity inside of me.

How would Camila act after everything that happened with us?

And once the lights went up and the music started, I finally saw the girl I loved once again.

He knows, dirty secrets that I keep

Does he know it’s killing me?

He knows, he knows

Camila looked good. She looked like she was having fun singing with Shawn. And as I looked at Shawn, I saw him smiling at her too. They sounded good together and the way their voices blended was incredible.

I can’t seem to let you go

I can’t seem to keep you close

Was there meaning behind those words? Did Shawn really think that about Camila?

Look me in the eyes my lover

Was it just a coincidence when Shawn looked at her as he sang that line? Or was he pleading with Camila to look at him more than just a friend?

I was only hurting myself the more I looked at Shawn and Camila having fun on stage like that. So I stood up even before the song finished and made my way backstage. What did I think I was going to feel? Did I expect Camila to be devastated? To not smile at all? Funny how I constantly had to remind myself that I was the only one that loved.

My musings were interrupted by a round of applause behind me. The moment I turned around, I watched Camila hug Shawn who lifted her up and thanked her. Camila’s eyes were bright, her smile even brighter. It was such a long time since I saw that smile and even longer since I was the cause of that smile.

Shawn began talking to someone else and that’s when Camila’s eyes found mine. Her smile quickly disappeared and I hated myself for it. What can you do when you’re the reason someone frowns?

The only thing you can do—leave.

I smiled at her, more strained than genuine before walking away. I wanted to look back, to see her face and find out if she looked hurt or happy that I was leaving. But I knew it would only incite more hurt if I did. There was nothing for me here anymore.

And so I made the wish to get away. Maybe next time I can finally look at Camila without feeling like the earth was crumbling beneath my feet.

-//-//-//-//-//-

“That’s beautiful, Ally, precise pitch I love it,” I said through the mic.

Ally gave me two thumbs up and made her way out of the booth. I took a sip of my frappe as I played back the track. Ally’s voice was distinct and could reach heights most singers could only hope to reach. That’s why making her the lead on this track was the most brilliant idea I’ve had in a while.

I stretched my arms over my head and bent my neck to the side. We’ve been in the studio since the morning and it was past nine in the evening now. This was a very productive day and it’s safe to assume the album would undergo post-production in less than a month. The final product was actually coming together well. Plus their first single is ready and the music video was gonna be shot soon. The girls are super excited and I’m excited for their album too.

“Beautiful playback,” Julian exclaimed.

“I know. This is one of my favorite songs on their album. Ally really makes it her own.”

Julian called Dinah over who was fooling around with Normani and Lauren on the sofa. She immediately stood up and entered the booth. I decided to let Julian handle it and moved to the table where the donuts were calling my name.

I only had one bite before I saw Lauren walking towards me.

“Don’t hog the donuts, Y/N,” she said, smirking.

“Hey, I ordered this, it’s mine,” I said. I stuck out my tongue and carried the donut box, pretending I didn’t want to share.

Lauren laughed and took the box from me. She looked at the offerings and decided on the Bavarian one. It was after a couple of bites when Lauren finally talked to me.

“Y/N, I didn’t get the chance to apologize to you about what happened at New Year’s.”

I crossed my arms and grinned. “Oh? Something happened?”

She rolled her eyes and sighed. “You’re gonna make me say it aren’t you?”

“Yup,” I replied, taking a bite of my donut.

“I’m sorry for getting drunk and having you carry me home. I really feel bad about it and if it makes you feel any better, my dad gave me an earful while I was hangover the next morning. My head hurts just thinking about it.”

I finished my donut and grabbed a napkin to wipe my hands. “What do you remember about that night?”

Lauren began gnawing on her lower lip. “I don't—I just remember talking to you in the club. Then you walked me to your car and I passed out.”

“Ahh,” I uttered, nodding my head.

“Oh my god,” Lauren exclaimed, her hands shooting up to her face in shock. “Did I do something stupid?”

My mind began to wander to that day again and how she kissed me. If she didn’t remember, that meant she didn’t mean to do it, right? It might’ve been just reflex or she thought I was someone else. There’s no sense bringing up the kiss if she doesn’t remember anyway.

“I was also a bit drunk so I don’t really know.”

“Wait, you drove me home and you were drunk?”

I shrugged. “Just a little. Plus I needed to get you home. Don’t worry, I drove safely. As you can see, we’re both still alive.”

Lauren laughed, a sound I didn’t hear quite often but had to admit was nice to hear. “Thank you, I really mean it.”

The Cuban girl and I made small talk a little bit more until Julian finished recording Dinah’s part and called us all over. I sat beside him while the girls were huddled in front of us.

“Good job everyone, we made some great progress today.”

“Thank god,” Ally exclaimed, which earned a small laugh from her bandmates. “How many songs did we finish today?”

“Uh… none actually,” said Julian.

“What?”

“Camila’s parts aren’t recorded yet.”

This morning I stepped inside the studio fully guarding my heart and mind from Camila Cabello. But when I opened the door, there was no sign of her. Even her bandmates didn’t know where she was. Moreover, they’ve been calling her all day but she wasn’t answering. I began getting worried but I realized that this was good. If I didn’t see hear, hear her, or talk to her then I won’t be inclined to fall again, right?

“Damn, where is that girl?” Dinah asked, more herself than anyone in particular.

Suddenly the doors opened and the current topic of conversation waltzed inside in full smiles. “Hey guys,” she exclaimed. I turned my chair in Julian’s direction so I wasn’t looking at her.

“Camila, where were you?” inquired Julian. He looked pretty pissed to be honest and so did the other members.

“Oh sorry, my phone died,” I heard her say. “I went to an interview with Shawn for our song.”

Julian leaned forward and pushed my chair by accident. I swung around and was face to face with Camila. Our eyes met but not for long because she turned them to Normani this time.

“Mila, why didn’t you tell us? We were worried about you when we couldn’t reach you,” she said.

“I’m sorry, okay? It wasn’t my fault. Phone,” she said, raising it so the others could see. “Dead.”

“Yo Mila we were literally eating breakfast together,” chimed Dinah.

“Yeah what the fuck?” It was Lauren this time. I could probably cut the tension between them with scissors if I had them. Lauren’s eyes were hard on Camila and the younger girl was withdrawing to herself.

“This day was for recording,” she continued. “Like yesterday was. We all agreed that we wouldn’t go to the PCA because we were gonna be recording and then you suddenly haul your ass out of the house to sing with Shawn? What. The. Fuck. We let you go yesterday but this is bullshit.”

“But—”

“Lauren’s right, Camila,” Julian said, interrupting Camila. “We could’ve finished three songs today but because you weren’t here we had to adjust the schedule again.”

Camila’s hand was clenched on her side. I wanted to tell her not to fight them anymore and just apologize because she was the one in the wrong here. But before I could get a word in, things took a turn for the worse. “You guys know this is important to me! Why can’t you just support me for once?”

“And the band is not fucking important to you?” Lauren took one step forward which made Camila take one step back.

“You practically sing ninety percent of each song, Mila,” shouted Normani. “Do you hear us complain? No. We just shut our mouths and let you lead. This band is your responsibility just as it’s ours.

"Mani is right.” It was Ally this time. “Have a sense of responsibility, Camila. You can’t just go where you want without telling us. We’re a unit. This is not just mine or your show. It’s ours.”

“Then just cut me out of all the songs!” screamed Camila. She was getting defensive, which isn’t a good sign. “Since I’m such a burden to the album just cut me the fuck out!”

I decided to finally intervene before this band breaks up even before the album finishes.

“Girls—”

“Fuck you!” Everyone held their breath at Lauren’s outburst. “Stop being immature and grow the fuck up! You’re part of this band, you’re part of this album, so fucking act like it. Do you think we’re your back-up singers? How about you start respecting what we’re doing here and be part of the damn band? Shit, if you’re gonna act like this then I wish you were never a part of this fucking band at all!”

Lauren was fuming and my jaw was on the floor. I was still processing what she said when I caught a glimpse of Camila. Tears were already pooling in her eyes and she was trying so hard not to let them fall. Lauren, on the other hand, must’ve realized what she just said because her features immediately softened until she looked like she was in pain. The other members just stood there, stunned by what happened but not knowing what to do.

Minutes passed by and the first person to react to what happened was Camila.

She bit her lip and ran out of the studio.

“Mila,” Dinah called out, running towards the door. I immediately stood and stopped her. I know Dinah didn’t say anything but if she went to Camila right now, she would think that Dinah betrayed her. There was only one option left.

“Don’t. Stay here, I’ll handle it.”

She hesitated, looking between the door and me but following in the end and walking towards the sofa where the other girls were huddled in. The other two were comforting Lauren who was also in tears.

I didn’t waste any more time and ran out, trying to find Camila. She wasn’t in the pool room or the gym. She wasn’t on the parking lot or rooftop either. I was about to give up when I reached the lobby and overheard the receptionist talking to someone about hearing sobbing in the bathroom.

I made my way to the girl’s bathroom and checked the stalls for Camila. It didn’t take long before I opened the last stall and saw Camila sitting on the toilet with her hands covering her face. I kneeled in front of her and carefully pulled her hands away from her face. Her eyes, swollen with tears, broke my heart. She looked like she was physically in pain and I was willing to do anything I could just to see her smile again.

“Camila,” I called out. “I’m here.” She looked into my eyes and I smiled. “I’m here for you.”

I didn’t expect her to join me on the floor and hug me tight but I relished in it. This was the best thing I could ever do for Camila—just be here for her whenever she needed me.

“Get me out of here… please,” she whispered.

And in no time at all, I lifted her up in my arms and carried her away—from her pain and from her fears.

-//-//-//-//-//-

There were numerous times throughout my life where I could almost physically feel the pain of my heart breaking. One was when I watched my father’s back as he walked away from us. Second was watching my mom basically throw away her own life by working multiple jobs just to help Sam and I live.

But now, sitting here, not being able to do anything as Camila shed her tears, the pain of those two heartbreaks came back full force.

It’s been an hour since I drove Camila away from the studio. She just continued to cry as I drove away, with no specific destination in mind. Finally, I stopped when we reached Long Beach and I found a scenic cliff overlooking the city and the ocean. I sat with Camila on the hood, staying silent as she continued to pour out her emotions.

A few minutes later, her sobs stopped and I saw her shiver from the cold air. I wrote a wish on my notes and soon enough I grabbed two jackets from the trunk and placed one around Camila. For a second, I glanced at her swollen, red eyes and my heart broke again.

It took another fifteen minutes before Camila finally spoke up.

“Thank you… for everything.” Her words were so soft that I almost missed what she said. But the appreciation on her face was loud and clear.

“Anything for you.”

“God I’m such an idiot,” she said, sniffling.

“You’re not.”

“Lauren was right. I should’ve put the band first. I knew she was right but I was too stubborn to admit it.”

Camila hugged her knees close to her chest which made her look much smaller than who she really was. The Camila beside me was someone who no one saw, no one knew about, and someone who was very much broken.

“Yeah,” I said. “I guess you were wrong about that but Lauren was also out of line. To wish you were never part of the band is too much.”

Camila’s smile was strained—tired—like it took all her effort to be happy. “Lauren’s always been like that. She was just telling the truth.”

“Cam—”

“I’m so fucking stupid. Why do you even love me?” she said, chuckling bitterly.

I knew she didn’t expect me to answer. It was a question meant to punctuate the fact that she did something idiotic after all. But still that very question was loaded with all the unspoken feelings between us.

Not mine… but hers.

“I fell for your beautiful soul and even more beautiful mind. I love everything you are and everything you’re not. You are so perfectly flawed and yet… so perfectly pure.” Camila looked at me, her eyes becoming clearer and the redness starting to disappear. “It’s not hard to love you.”

“I’m sure after all of this you’ll realize it’s not hard to get over me either.”

A misplaced laugh escaped my lips. “How can you say that when all I could think about right now is to hug you really tightly and squeeze out all of the pain you’re going through?”

Camila’s hand made its way to mine and held it tightly. “I wish you could. If—” She stopped herself before saying anything more. I didn’t ask her about it, fully expecting Camila to let it be a mystery just like all the times before. But then she whispered, so softly like she was only telling the wind, and yet they reached my ears unmistakably.

“If anyone can take it away, it’s you.”

There was something stirring in Camila’s eyes that made me feel that her pain wasn’t just born out of what happened earlier—but something else I didn’t know about. She looked like she was carrying the world’s weight on her shoulders and I didn’t want anything else but to relieve that from her.

Still holding Camila close to me, I raised my other hand and pointed to the scenery in front of us.

“What do you see, Camila?” I asked. She looked at me first before following my arm and gazing beyond the cliff.

“The city sleeping,” she answered.

I smiled and nodded. “And below, what do you see?”

“The ocean.”

“Isn’t it interesting,” I said, looking out at the beautiful contrast of the lighted city to the shrouded ocean, “how the city looks completely different now than it was the morning before? Now it’s quiet—peaceful—when earlier it was a mesh of traffic and noise.”

Camila looked thoughtful and I took that as a good sign so I continued. “You can hear the roar of the ocean from here. The ocean waves continue to slap against the rocks, stopping people from setting foot in its dominion. And yet this morning the ocean invited people to be in it, to revel in its beauty.”

“Are you talking about the contrast?”

“I’m talking about change, Camila.” She turned to me and I gave her a soft smile. “Everything changes. The city changes, the ocean changes—”, I reached out and cupped her cheek, “And your pain. It’ll change. It’s not permanent. You just have to push through it.”

Camila’s face was close to mine but for the first time, I had no thoughts about kissing her or furthering the relationship we have. The only thing I could think about was that this girl has been coping with her problems alone. Even I was luckier than her because at least I had Phantasm. But Camila… only had me.

Slowly, I dropped my hand from her face and slid down the hood. Camila’s eyes followed me as I grabbed something from the glove compartment then moved in front of her. The moment her eyes dropped from me to the box in my hands, I saw the immediate recognition in her eyes. I turned the box to face Camila and slowly raised the lid.

“You just have to remember who you are. You have to cling unto those good times and don’t let the sadness win. Be who you are even if people tell you to change.”

I took the necklace from the box and placed it around Camila’s neck. It was a last minute decision on whether I would take the necklace to LA or not. There were a lot of bad memories connected with it but I realized that at least if Camila and I really do part ways, I can give her something to remember me by.

I pulled away but not before placing a kiss on her forehead. “You are so strong, Camila. You don’t know how many people you’ve saved by you just being yourself. But if you think you can’t handle the pain anymore, I’m here. I’ve told you again and again and you’re probably tired of hearing me say this but I’ll say it once more. I'm—”

“—always here for me,” Camila said, smiling, which causes me to break out into a grin.

“Of course I am. I love you. I always will.”

Finally I made Camila smile again. It was such a good feeling and I was busy patting myself on the back that I didn’t notice Camila grab my shirt. Our eyes met for a beat—one second that I’ve imagined over and over in my mind but never dreamed would be a reality.

And then she pulled me down towards her where our lips collided.

The first thing I realized was that her lips were as soft as they looked. Amidst the shock I was feeling, Camila moved her lips, caressing mine lovingly and, dare I say it, longingly. But the most surprising thing was that with Lauren, I felt nothing but shock and dread but with Camila, it only took me two seconds before I moved along with her. That’s how I knew that this was right.

However, I could hear warning bells at the back of my mind.

Camila keeps me in the dark regarding lots of things but the most important thing was her feelings for me. She was the most complicated woman I’ve met emotionally and I knew that having to be this close to her when there was no clear indication of what her feelings were towards me is heading to disaster.

But still I cupped her face in my hands and drew in a deeper kiss which she welcomed. Maybe I would get hurt sooner or later but this—with Camila—was something I would do again and again even with a gun poised deftly on my head.

This night, however, was something special between the two of us. And so as I held Camila closer, those sirens I used to trust wholeheartedly were drowned out beneath the love and blind trust I gave to the person I loved.

A/N: Hello tumblr readers, just a reminder that you can catch much more of Phantasm in Wattpad where it’s updated up to Chapter 16 at this time. So follow me there (@laurensguy) if you haven’t already and say hi :)

#UPDATE #series #non AU #slash #/you #angst drama #family #humour #romance fluff #submission #Phantasm

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5hfanfiction · 7 years

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(Camila/You) - Phantasm - Chapter 5

I deserve this.

Camila laughed and my whole world practically came crashing down. Camila smiled and my heart would’ve jumped out my chest if it could. Camila sang and I just wanted to grab her and hold her body close to me. That’s how much I loved her.

But yeah, I deserve this.

“You’re good, Dinah.” Julian gave Dinah a thumbs-up as I pressed stop on the recording. Yeah, this was my job now. Just pressing buttons and sulking. Julian told me that he was going to take over producing duties and banned me from talking to the girls. Of course I could’ve just imposed myself on him but there was a point in all this.

He was stopping me from hurting Camila again.

And maybe in a sense, he was also stopping me from hurting myself. I watched Normani go into the studio. None of the girls even acknowledged my existence after that day. Well, there was Lauren who I would catch looking in my direction every so often but we never exchanged words with each other. I guess that would be for the best. Because again, I deserve this.

“Yeah, just try that line one more time a note higher.” Julian was keeping busy trying to finish whatever we could before the girls had to leave. It was our last day in the studio until they were going home for Christmas break. I thought I would be more disappointed than I was but it was better this way. The farther Camila was to me, the better it was for her.

Sleep evaded me most nights as my thoughts clouded with regrets. However, it hadn’t been good to me, I couldn’t even write a single song. I just stared at the hotel ceiling, assaulted by ‘what ifs’. I haven’t really been making any wishes either. Or if I did, they were minimal and sometimes didn’t even make sense. I remember about three days ago I asked Phantasm for 'the cure to an everlasting pool of despair and heartache that engulfs my impaired heart’. She just stared at me and two minutes later, room service brought me two gallons of ice cream.

The day went by uneventfully as the girls finally said their goodbyes to Julian. They hugged him and wished him a merry Christmas. To spare them from an awkward scene with me, I pretended to go out and answer a call. In reality, it was just Phantasm shaking her head and repeatedly calling me a 'love-deficient cactus’. I don’t even know what that means.

Once I finally got back to my hotel room, I immediately jumped on my bed without taking off my shoes. Exhaustion finally got to me and I felt my eyes slowly grow heavier. I could hear a faint ringing in the background but I couldn’t move my eyes let alone my arms.

And so I finally let sleep tuck me in.

But even in sleep Camila didn’t escape me.

That scene would play over and over again and in my head I knew I had to change my words but no matter how much I planned them in my head, they still came out the same. They still hurt Camila and agonizingly so.

The moment I opened my eyes, I immediately saw the dark sky out the balcony window. Shit, I was hoping it would’ve been morning already. Now I had to deal with my thoughts again instead of sleeping. Not even a minute after waking up, I heard my phone ringing on the sofa. Being the lazy ass that I am, I managed to grumble my way to it but only after the ringing stopped.

I half-expected to see Phantasm greet me at the lock screen but my brows shot up at the twenty-seven missed calls from my mom flashing on my screen. So I wasn’t surprised when I saw she also left me twenty messages.

Mom: Y/N, are you still in LA?

Mom: Honey why aren’t you answering your phone?

Mom: I hope you didn’t forget what today is. It’s your sister’s Christmas play. You’re coming, right?

“FUCK!”

I only had the time to curse out loud before I bolted to my closet and started packing like a maniac.

Because Camila was the only thing I could think of lately, I completely forgot about my family. This never happened before, they were always my number one priority. And it seemed like lately all my priorities have changed because of one girl. How pathetic could I get?

Thirty minutes later, after packing the bare necessities, I ran out of my room and took the elevator to the lobby. At this point, I couldn’t care less anymore that my hair was a mess and I probably had drool on my face. If I missed Sam’s play she was never going to forgive me.

Luckily LA traffic seemed to cooperate and I was at the airport in minimal time. My bodyguard escorted me inside and I saw a flight to Miami about to leave in forty-five minutes. Luckily, catching that flight would let me catch act 2, possibly the end of act 1. After making sure my hood and sunglasses were secure on my face, I sprinted to the check-in counter while my bodyguard stayed behind.

“Hi, how may I help you today?” asked the ground attendant, a generic smile plastered on her face.

“I’m on a flight to Miami,” I said, rummaging through my bag for the ticket. “Luckily I made it just in time.”

She nodded. “Boarding is in fifteen minutes. I just need to see your ticket.”

I smiled again and continued going through my bag but five minutes later, there still was no ticket. I looked up and saw the attendant looking at me impatiently. “Is there a problem?” she asked.

“No, I—I just—can’t seem to find my ticket.”

“Did you leave it at home?”

I’m sure I didn’t leave it at the hotel. I vividly remember wishing Phantasm for the ticket, there’s no mistake about it.

“Hey, Phantasm?” I asked after a sigh.

“Yes, your sighness?”

“I wish for a ticket on the 22nd.” I burrowed my face on the pillow and tried not to think about Camila for the tenth time this hour.

“What ticket?”

“A ticket,” I grumbled.

“Specifically what? Hey! What kind? Hey! Don’t fall asleep on me!”

Okay so I asked for a ticket, then what happened after that? The attendant looked amused at my facial expressions as I tried to remember what happened after I made a wish.

Was this how things were gonna be from now on? All the girls not talking to me and treating me like an outsider? I know it wasn’t their fault, it was mine after all. But I can’t help but feel conflicted about it. We weren’t going to see each other during Christmas break and I can’t just leave with this heavy feeling.

A knock on the door pulled me out of my reverie and I opened it to see my bodyguard. I grabbed my phone and proceeded to walk in the hall with him.

“Oh, by the way,” he said, pulling an envelope out from his coat. “This came for you today.”

“What is it?” I was already opening the envelope before I asked. “What—a lottery ticket? Why would someone give me this?”

My bodyguard shrugged as I pushed the envelope into his hands. “It was even priority mail.”

I sighed and walked into the lobby. “You hold on to it, I don’t need it.”

“That fucking idiot!”

Every eye on the floor was turned to me but I couldn’t care less. How could Phantasm even THINK I meant a lottery ticket? What would I need a fucking lottery ticket for?

“Umm, is something wrong?” asked the ground attendant. I pulled the hood off my head and took of my sunglasses. I heard the attendant gasp but I didn’t care that I’ll probably get mobbed now.

Phantasm and I needed to talk.

Or that’s what I thought.

Because my phone was nowhere to be found. “Shit, shit, shit!” I shouted, realizing I left my phone at the hotel due to my haste.

This was bad—very bad. The moment I heard the intercom say the flight was boarding, my heart sank. I had no other options because I had no way of reaching Phantasm. There was the option of driving back to the hotel but my ride would’ve left by now. Plus I didn’t know the name of the hotel, I had no reason to know.

Until now.

I turned to the still shocked ground attendant and flashed her my best smile. “I don’t suppose I can buy a ticket for the Miami flight, could I?”

“I—I’m sorry but that flight is full. The next one, however—”

“No, no, I need to fly to Miami NOW. I have no other options,” I begged.

“I’m sorry but there’s really nothing I could do. If there is, I would do it, trust me. I’m your biggest fan.”

I jumped closer to the counter and held her hands. I saw the blush creep up her cheeks as I looked into her eyes. This was probably going to be the headline for tomorrow but it didn’t matter because I wouldn’t even have a tomorrow if I don’t come to Sam’s play.

“I am begging you… Simone,” I said, reading her name tag. “My sister is in a play and I have to get to Miami to watch it or I’ll lose her. She’ll hate me and then I’ll hate myself. This flight is my lifeline. Simone, you’re my lifeline. So please, please, help me this one time.”

Simone looked at me then at the screen and I saw she was conflicted. I uttered a last 'please’ before she sighed and smiled. Just when I thought I was finally going to get a break, a man walked in our direction and glared at me.

“I’m sorry but there are no more vacancies. You are welcome to buy one for the next flight, however,” he said, his voice punctuating every word to show me that he was the boss and it was his word that counted in the end.

He was not a man to be easily swayed. However, desperate times called for desperate measures and I was prepared to do whatever it took to see my sister.

“How about a transfer? Is that possible?”

A familiar voice behind me stopped my train of thought. There was no denying who it belonged to and there was also no denying what feelings she stirred up in my heart just hearing the sound of her voice. I slowly turned around and faced a girl whose face was as familiar as my own.

“Camila?”

She gave me a small smile before turning to the man beside me. “How about it, sir? Can a ticket be transferred to Y/N?”

“What do you mean?”

Camila looked through her bag and pulled out a ticket. “This is my friend’s ticket. She was supposed to come with me but her friends came to LA so she’s flying at a later date. She’s not going to be boarding the plane so can Y/N replace her instead?”

I caught Lauren’s name on the paper before she gave it to the man. He inspected the ticket and looked between the two of us. “I’m sorry but transfers are normally not allowed unless it’s for a valid or dire reason.”

I was about to speak up when I saw Camila step up beside me so confidently that it looked like she was about to put the man in his place.

“Sir, no disrespect, but Y/N’s intentions are genuine. That ticket is to see her sister who’s waiting for her right now. There’s a girl waiting for her sister who she hasn’t seen for months. If she doesn’t get on that plane, she might lose their relationship. Is that dire enough for you?” The man sighed and looked at the ticket. “Don’t be the one that pulls the trigger on Y/N’s family.”

For what seemed like hours, the man finally looked at us sternly. “This is just a one time thing. Promise me it won’t happen again.”

“It won’t, I promise,” I said.

“I have to make some calls to validate the transfer.”

“Yes, I can wait.”

“You have to pay a transferal fee.”

“No matter the cost.”

He laughed and turned to Camila. “You have a way with words young lady. Use it well,” he said before finally leaving.

Without thinking, I immediately turned to the girl beside me and hugged her tight. I felt her body stiffen but I was too engrossed in my happiness to notice the awkwardness present there. Only after a minute did I finally let the things that happened to us the last few days catch up.

“Thanks, Camila.”

She nodded and walked away from me, her luggage rolling heavily on the floor. “I’ll see you inside.”

“Yeah,” I whispered. I couldn’t hide from my feelings anymore. I had to apologize to Camila now or never. I knew I had no chance of dating her anymore but I would rather accept her as a friend rather than gone from my life at all.

-//-//-//-//-//-

I watched my shoelaces slide around my shoes as I shuffled my feet for the hundredth time. My hood covered my head so I didn’t need to worry about anyone recognizing me. But still, a sense of dread falls on my shoulders with the realization that I didn’t have Phantasm with me. Before I knew it, I relied on her more and more to navigate the craziness of my new life. Now that she wasn’t here, I was clueless about what I should be doing or who I was.

Maybe that’s why I was still in the airport and waiting on Camila to help me. Raising my head, I saw Camila still talking to an elderly man and woman who greeted her once we came out of the gate. The resemblance was uncanny that I knew they were her parents immediately. A few pokes in my memory gave them a name: Sinu and Alejandro. The same goes for Sofi peeking towards my direction every now and then. She was about Sam’s age but seemed a little bit more shy and wary of strangers than my sister was.

Maybe if I was the person I was a few weeks ago, I would’ve been ecstatic to meet Camila’s family. After all, I wanted to know all I could about her and who the people were that made her the amazing girl that she was now. But after all the shit I pulled, the only thing I felt was that I didn’t deserve to be here. I didn’t deserve to be helped by Camila Cabello.

But what could I do when I didn’t even know what I should do? I had no idea where my sister’s school was. I had no idea on how to go around Miami. I had no fucking car. All I had was—

“Y/N.”

Camila’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts. She was standing near me now—so near that my arm could touch hers if I just moved an inch. Immediately I’m pulled back to the day I let myself touch her—the rush I felt caressing her cheek, the lump in my throat as I watched her lips part, even the thought that maybe, just maybe, this perfection could be mine—I felt all those bittersweet memories.

“I talked to my parents,” she said, pulling out her phone. “They said they’ll get a cab so we can drive to the school. They’re already starting but I think we can still make it before it ends.”

“How—how did you know?” I asked.

Camila continued to tap on her phone but answered nonetheless. “Sofi is in the same school as your sister. Come on, we’re going to be late.”

She grabbed my arm and I only had a second to appreciate the contact before she was pulling me out the door. Once we found the car, she threw me the keys without saying anything and climbed inside. Soon enough, we were on the road to my sister’s school. It didn’t take long before the awkwardness kicked in again and unlike at the plane, I had no excuse to keep quiet this time.

My mind was made up to apologize to Camila but the moment I gathered my resolve, she told me she was tired and went to sleep. I let her rest and just hoped she would wake up before we landed but I had no such luck. That’s why I knew this was the only chance I had to patch up our relationship.

I cleared my throat and chanced a glance beside me. Camila was looking outside the window.

“Hey, Camila, I—umm—” The words immediately caught in my throat once she turned to me and I was face to face with her in such a cramped place. Her gaze, so cool and distant, was so different from the way she looked at me when we were writing our song.

“What is it?” she asked.

“I—umm—I don't—know where the school is.” She looked confused so I smiled and spoke. “I’ve never actually been there so…”

“Oh, yeah no problem. I’ll tell you where to go. Take the next exit here.”

I nodded and we were back at square one. Silence. And I knew this time, there were no more excuses.

I slowed to a stop at a red light and faced her. “Camila,” I called out. She turned to me and I continued. “I know it’s late and it might not matter to you anymore but still… I’m sorry for snapping at you in the studio a few weeks ago.”

Her eyes cast downwards then to the front as I started driving again. It was easier for my thoughts to come out when I wasn’t looking into her eyes.

“I didn’t mean anything I said. I was angry and in a bad mood so I ended up taking it all out on you. You’re the last person I want to get angry at me, Camila. I’m really sorry.”

Camila stayed silent after what I said and I didn’t blame her. She was minding her own business when I just exploded right in front of her. I was starting to think that maybe even salvaging a friendship with her would be impossible.

“Y/N,” she softly uttered.

“Yes?” I immediately sat in attention and looked towards her.

“Make a left here.”

“Oh… uh, yeah.”

She didn’t say anything more than that and maybe it was for the best. I could get over her quicker at this pace. I rolled my eyes. Yeah right like that would ever happen.

“Why were you in a bad mood?”

I looked at Camila and debated whether I could really tell her the truth—that I was jealous of her and Shawn. That would mean facing my feelings for Camila head-on which I wasn’t ready for. These feelings were all new to me and if I couldn’t accept them myself, what’s the hope of Camila accepting it?

“Even at the party you wouldn’t even talk to me. What happened, Y/N?” she asked.

But as I looked into her eyes, I knew I had no choice. I couldn’t let her go just like that—not anymore.

“I was angry at you… and Shawn,” I said with a shaky voice. My heart felt like it was going to explode.

“What—what did we do?”

“It’s not something you did. It’s just something I felt.”

“Something you felt?”

Camila wasn’t navigating anymore because her whole focus was on me. Luckily I could see some street signs pointing me to where I needed to go.

I sighed and gave her a weary smile. “I was jealous because even before our song, you already wrote one with someone else. It made me feel like our song wasn’t special anymore. Because you already shared that experience with Shawn.”

There weren’t that many people at the parking lot when I drove in, probably because they were already watching the play. Camila didn’t say a word until I parked the car.

“Y/N, I don’t understand. What do you mean about our song being special? You’ve written hundreds for other artists who are much better than me and—”

“I like you, Camila.”

It seemed like all the air in my lungs left me at that moment. Camila’s mouth dropped a little at my revelation and I couldn’t help but think that maybe this was the worst time I could possibly confess my feelings to her like that. But I also knew that the only option now was to go forward.

“What—I—”, she stuttered.

Taking a deep breath, I looked straight into her eyes and laid my heart out for her. “I like you. I’ve known about you before I even worked with your band. I’ve been curious about you for a long time. And that curiosity made me want to get to know you more and I realized that you were an amazing human being. You’re an incredible artist and an inspired songwriter. Before I knew it my time with you became something I looked forward to. It became something special.”

My mind began to run with thoughts of what she might be thinking of my revelation. Thoughts of her thinking of ways to run the hell away from me crept into my mind but I steeled my resolve and continued.

“So when I found out you and Shawn had already written a song together, I was angry—hurt. I started to think that maybe I was the only one who valued the words we wrote together. Maybe I was the only one enjoying writing a song with you. Those harsh words were the result of that jealousy. I’m sorry, Camila. I really, really am.”

Her eyes refused to meet mine the moment I finished. My heart broke at the sight because the reason I told her all of this was for me not to lose her. But it seemed like I achieved the opposite. Can I ask Phantasm to erase Camila’s memories of me confessing to her? I was too engulfed in my thoughts to notice that Camila was staring at me.

“Y/N.” There was no emotion on her face at all. Her eyes were sharp on mine as if they just made a decision. And I had no doubt that decision concerned the status of our relationship. The only question is: was I ready to hear it? “I think we—”

“I need to go.”

I wasn’t.

“What? What’re you—”

But I was already outside of the car before she could finish her sentence. My heart wasn’t ready for what she was about to say. I needed more time to accept the reality of losing my first love.

“I’m sorry, I—my sister needs me,” I blurted out before running towards the school. I knew I was being a coward by leaving her there without saying what she needed to.

But as I felt the start of tears pricking the corner of my eyes, I knew that I made the right decision.

-//-//-//-//-//-

The moment Sam saw me walk through those doors, the smile never left her face until the production finished. I still owe my sister a great deal and I intend to pay her back. I missed her a lot and right now there was nowhere I’d rather be than beside my family.

Camila followed me inside after a few minutes and stood silently beside me. I glanced as she smiled and laughed along with the play. She stood there comfortable like my outburst of emotions didn’t happen and I was stuck here with my heart about to explode in my chest.

A few people flocked us when the curtains went down, taking pictures and asking for autographs. When I saw my mom walking over to Sam, I excused ourselves and walked over to them. Sam ran up to hug me the moment she saw me.

“Y/N! You’re here!” Her voice was muffled as she placed her hands around my waist. I gave her a tight hug back and kissed the top of her head.

“I missed you, Sam. You were amazing up there, I’m proud of you sis.”

She beamed at me and I couldn’t help but smile back. Sam was more precious to me than anything in this world and she was the last person I wanted to disappoint.

I was about to apologize about being late when I saw her eyes widen as she looked behind me. I quickly remembered that Sam was a big fan of Fifth Harmony, especially Camila so I introduced them to each other.

“Hi, Sam, I’m Camila! You were so good up there, it was magical.” She pulled my sister into a hug and I knew it took all of Sam’s self-control not to squeal in excitement.

“Oh my god hi. I’m your biggest fan, I literally worship you.” Camila laughed and gave her another quick hug.

“Thanks Sam, you’re so cute.”

While the two of them got acquainted, I inched away to my mom and gave her a hug too. “Hey mom, sorry I’m late.”

“Don’t worry, I know Sam appreciates you just being here at all. She knows you’re busy but she still hopes to have that time with you,” she said.

I sighed and looked back at her. Before my wish, I had all the time in the world for Sam and my mom. They were the only ones that mattered. But now, my priorities have changed and living two lives was more like living one and abandoning the other.

After taking a few photos of our family and even with Camila, we walked over to the parking lot. There weren’t much people now and I could only hear the soft hums of engines as cars passed by. I was blindly walking behind my mom and noticed that she was walking over to a black Lexus on the lot.

The driver’s door opened as a man in a neat, crisp suit walked out and opened the passenger’s side. I was about to voice out my curiosity when my mom turned around and looked at me and Camila.

“Ride with us, Camila, honey. We’ll take you home,” she suggested.

“We actually drove here, mom,” I recalled. “Camila’s parents were kind enough to lend us their car so I could get here in time.”

She smiled and took Camila’s hand. “Thank you for helping our Y/N, dear. I’m indebted to you.”

“Don’t worry about it, Mrs. L/N, it’s fine. Y/N’s my friend and I’m happy to help,” she replied with an innocent smile.

Friend.

Huh.

“Well then take Camila home safely, okay Y/N? Make sure to drive safely and don’t get any scratches on the car,” she warned.

I laughed and gave her a hug. “I won’t, I promise.”

“Don’t forget to thank her parents.”

“Yes, yes.”

“I’ll call Macy and ask her to come pick you up.”

“Uh… Macy?”

She crossed her hands and tilted her head to the side. “Your driver.”

“Ah yes, Macy my… driver,” I drawled out. I had no fucking idea who that was.

We watched my family drive off before Camila and I did the same ourselves. The ride was silent and uneventful, fortunately. I only managed to thank her for coming with me before we were stuck in the rut we’ve been in since that godforsaken day at the studio. I began to wonder what might be going on inside Camila’s mind.

Those thoughts never left me even after I parked the car in front of her house and walked her to her door. The night was silent and serene unlike my mind which was filled of thousands of thoughts about one girl.

One girl who was looking at anywhere but me.

“Camila,” I started, “thanks again for helping me get to Sam’s play. I couldn’t have gotten there in time if it wasn’t for you.” I waited a beat for any semblance of a response but when I saw nothing, I knew I needed to be the one to end this. “See you in January.”

This was how it was supposed to be. Not some fairy tale ending when everything would just fall into place. And the sooner I leave her, the sooner I can try to move on.

Putting my hands in my pockets, I put one foot ahead of the other and walked away.

Or tried to.

Because after the first step, Camila’s hand wrapped around my arm and turned me around to face her again.

“Can you give me more time?”

“More… time?” I asked. Out of all the scenarios in my head, her asking for more time didn’t once enter my mind.

She nodded and smiled. “You said you liked me. Can you give me more time?”

“To what?” My words came out in a whisper this time. Her hand was still on my arm and her eyes were fixed on mine.

Instead of answering, however, she wrapped her hands around me and pulled me into a hug. My arms were frozen on my sides as I felt her face tucked into my neck. Her arms held me tight, with no sign of letting go. I wanted to live in that moment, to not let it pass and just enjoy the feel of her body on mine—to feel our hearts finally beat together. But I couldn’t be selfish, not this time. And not with this girl.

“Okay,” I breathed out. I felt her lips curve into a smile on my neck which made my body yield into her touch and I finally wrapped my arms around her too.

I didn’t know how long we stayed like that. But the moment she pulled away, she walked straight inside her house and didn’t even look back. I was left standing there alone until I heard the low honk of a car in the distance. My thoughts were all over the place as I walked over to whom I assumed was Macy.

She studied me with curiosity and raised her brow. After a while she handed a handkerchief and smiled. “I don’t know how you could even sweat in this cold weather.”

“What?”

She pointed to the side of her neck. “Your neck is wet.”

I walked over to the car and studied myself. Slowly, I raised my hand and touched my skin. Macy was right, my neck was wet. But she was wrong about the reason. It wasn’t sweat.

It was Camila’s tears.

A/N: More time for what? Hmm…

#UPDATE #series #non AU #slash #/you #angst drama #family #humour #romance fluff #submission #Phantasm

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