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hutchhitched · 4 years

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The Vintage Joshifer Series: End of Love—Chapter 21 (Final Chapter)

End of Love by hutchhitched

Finally, y’all! A million years ago during Catching Fire promo, I stumbled into a friendship with some amazing Joshifer fans. Despite not being a full-blown shipper, I was absolutely thrilled to see an interest in writing historical AU fanfiction. For a long while, I knew what I wanted to write, but I couldn’t get the words to come. By the time I started posting, it seemed most of the Joshifer fandom had (understandably) moved on, but I still wanted to write this story and complete the commitment. After numerous delays and more stutters and stops than I can count, my contribution to @thevintagejoshiferseries is complete.

Big thanks to @burlesonspride for the banner and encouragement to join in on the fun. I know we don’t talk much anymore and you’ve moved on to other ventures, but I still adore you. There are a lot of others who deserve thanks, too, but you know who you are.

I chose the 1960s because the decade of rebellion speaks to me in so many ways. With recent events, I hope it does with some of you, too. There are so many people still struggling for political, economic, and human rights. The fight’s not over. Keep going.

Historical events in this chapter include the following:

The concert at Altamont in December 1969 became the symbol of excess and the end of a peaceful counterculture. If Woodstock was the ideal, Altamont demonstrated excess and danger and a drug culture that was out of control. There’s a lot of information on the event itself, but here are some great articles from Rolling Stone, the History Channel, Forbes, and The New Yorker.

Berkeley, California, December 1969

“Oh my GAWWWWWWWWWD!!!!!” Brenda squealed as Jen emerged from the airport and streaked toward her college roommate. “It’s been so long. You look so good!”

“You look so good, too!” Jen cried as she enveloped the other girl. “It’s so good to see you. I missed you so much, honey.”

“You don’t miss me. I’m nobody. Unlike my former roommate who’s the toast of the networks. I’m so proud of you, Jennifer!”

“Well, my professional life is great anyway,” Jen offered wryly and swallowed against the anger and pain that always lingered just below the surface since Josh’s disappearance over a year ago. “I’m happy about that.”

“You really haven’t heard from him at all? No phone call? Not even another letter explaining anything?”

Jen chuckled as she imagined Josh sitting down to write to her. The last time she’d seen him, he hadn’t been very interested in the written word. She couldn’t imagine that had changed much in the past twelve months, no matter how badly she wanted to hold onto the image of her former whatever-he’d-been as the guy she’d met in college and fallen in love with despite her best intentions. And now look where that had gotten her.

“Nothing. Besides, I don’t live in Chicago anymore, remember? New York City’s a better fit, and my coverage of Stonewall made my career. He knows how to find me if he wants to hear from me again.”

“But Jen—”

“I looked for him, you know,” she admitted. “When I was in the Village and the protestors were marching in the streets. I saw Andre, Josh’s college roommate. He’s been part of the gay underground for years, and I thought maybe he might be there. Still an activist. Still fighting for change. To make the world better, but he wasn’t. None of his friends have heard from him since Nixon was elected, and I’m damn sure not going to call his family. They don’t know me, and I’m not going to beg him to be part of my life anymore. I’ve sacrificed enough for him.”

Jen’s pronouncement hung in the air, and Brenda had enough grace to pretend she believed her. The silence stretched between the two women until Brenda shook her head and suggested they make their way to the cab line and head to their hotel. After all, they had a limited amount of time to get reacquainted before the alumni event they were supposed to attend.

Jen blinked away tears as they drove through town and by campus. Memories assailed her at every corner, and she suddenly felt very old for someone who’d only graduated from college a few years prior. She wanted to kick herself for running out on Josh the night they’d first slept together, and she regretted not working through their problems when they lived together in Chicago. It had just been so easy to run or to seduce him instead. Sex had always been good between the two of them, and she liked it. She’d felt empowered when he lost himself in her or when he’d turned to her body for comfort. The problem was that he’d stopped looking to her and started hiding, too. When they’d both ignored their problems, they’d lost each other.

A year later hadn’t dulled the ache of his absence. She’d been grieving since the election, but Josh had been for far longer. If she was fortunate—no, lucky—enough to find him again, she wouldn’t make the same mistake twice or however many times it was now. It would have to be pure luck to run into him again after all the ways fate had brought them together in the past, and she’d never been one to find four-leaf clovers. Unfortunately, last November seemed to be the end of their love story, no matter how much she wanted it to be another way.

“You know there’s a big Stones concert tomorrow not far from here. Some of my friends are going.” Jen jumped when Brenda’s words broke through her reverie.

“Really? I love them.”

“I know,” her old roommate said with a grin. “Want to go?”

“Absolutely! Wait, is this at Altamont? Woodstock West?”

“I knew you’d know what I was talking about. Sometimes it’s hard to remember you’re in the news business and have your ear to the ground more than us mere mortals.”

“Please,” Jen scoffed, but the wheels in her brain started turning. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to make a quick phone call.”

With that she made a beeline for the payphones on the far side of the hotel lobby. If she could pull a few strings, she could tie this to her job and make her friend really happy. What use was working herself to death and making her way up the ladder, slapping away the roving hands, working ten times harder than her male colleagues only to get a third as far—what use was any of that if she couldn’t sometimes cash in her success for press passes at a major counterculture event? None, that’s what, so she was damn well going to call her affiliate and let them know where she was.

After she completed her call, she made her way back to Brenda and they retired to their room to get ready for the alumni event. Jen made it through with as much grace and class as she could while attempting to stymie the rush of emotions that hit her every time she turned her head. She drank a little too much and laughed louder than she would have if she’d been acting completely like herself, but she survived. More than anything, she held onto the promise of seeing her favorite band in concert the next day. If she managed to score the press passes, even better.

“We need to make a stop on the way to the speedway. Can you be ready to go in 30?” Jen asked when they woke the next morning.

“What’s going on?”

“I need to stop by the local NBC affiliate to pick up some papers. My boss is being a real stickler about my time off while I’m out here. Something about an assignment. I want to make sure we have plenty of time to get to Altamont before the big names go onstage.”

“Why?”

“Well, it was supposed to be a surprise, but… Because I got us press passes. We’ll be able to get anywhere with them—including backstage.”

Brenda squealed and hugged her friend, which made Jen smile. It felt good that her hard work could help make someone else feel so good.

“Altamont, here we come!”

****

“This is a gas!” Brenda yelled into Jen’s ear. “These passes are the best.”

Smiling, Jennifer nodded and then pointed to the crowd indicating she was headed into the fray for a little bit. Brenda indicated her approval, and Jen headed off by herself for a few minutes. There were so many people at the racetrack. The music was loud, and she needed a break. Besides, she wanted to check out the crowd in case she could use the information she gathered for a news story later. After all, she was a journalist, a damn good one, at that, and her career came first. Now that her love life was dead, something had to.

Experiencing Altamont made her regret not taking her boss up on his suggestion she cover Woodstock. She’d considered it for a second, but she’d been exhausted from coverage of the Stonewall riots and then traveled home for a family function. At the time, she hadn’t wanted to take off on another assignment when there was plenty of news to cover in the city itself. If she had, though, she’d be able to compare the two music festivals.

The crowd at Altamont seemed perfectly content, albeit jittery. The lower the sun dropped in the sky, the more unrest she felt. She stepped around a shirtless, bearded man on the edge of the mosh pit in front of the stage and froze. There, not even ten feet from her, was Josh Hutcherson, alive and in the flesh. The man who’d haunted her dreams and had made her weep far too often over the past year was there, cheering and whooping as the Rolling Stones shifted into another song.

People surged around her. Frozen in place, she couldn’t drop her gaze from his face. Josh’s face. She’d imagined reuniting with him a million times, but now that the opportunity existed, she had no idea what to do or how to act or what to say. Stunned and breathless, she tried to smile, but she was positive her face held more of a grimace than anything else. And then he turned slightly, and she could tell the exact moment when he saw her. His handsome face went slack in shock, and he took a tentative, hobbled step toward her.

It took a minute for her to realize something had shifted. Someone pushed while another shoved back, and the concertgoers pressed closer together. Squeezed between two large men, she fought for space and scrambled frantically to keep Josh in her sights.

All hell erupted around her as men in black leather infiltrated the crowd. She saw a person fall and then another. Panicked fans stepped over the bodies on the ground, and she had to fight to stay upright at people swarmed around her. She struggled against the tightening noose, but she was losing ground.

“Jennifer!”

Suddenly, he was in front of her, pulling and tugging her free from the throng. He grabbed her hand and bulled his way toward the perimeter where it seemed there wasn’t quite so much danger.

“What are you doing here?” he shouted over the noise. “I thought you were in New York?”

She gaped at him. “How did you know that? Why are you here? Where have you been? And why the fuck did you leave me in Chicago, you shitless bastard?”

Josh opened and closed his mouth a few times before his face broke into a wide grin. “God, I missed you,” he laughed and cupped her face in his hands. Before she could shake him off, he leaned forward and kissed her.

Stunned, she stiffened under the onslaught, but she gradually melted into him. She’d forgotten how good he was at this, how his lips and tongue and teeth combined to weaken her knees and shatter her resolve. Then, she was kissing him back, passionate and frantic as he held her to him. She was seconds from tearing his shirt over his head when someone slammed into them. Hard.

He broke away and glanced around them to assess the situation. “We need to get out of here,” he shouted and grabbed her hand to pull her along.

“Wait! Brenda’s here. She’s backstage. I can’t leave her.”

“Jen! I want you safe.”

She shook her head and twisted to look at the stage. Everything was in chaos, but she glimpsed her roommate briefly. She waved and ducked away under the arm of one of the workers who’d been flocking around them when they’d first arrived. If the wide grin on her face was any indication, Brenda would be absolutely fine.

“Let’s go!” she yelled but allowed him to pull her behind him through the rioting crowd and into a clear area near the parking lot.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his hands running over her shoulders and arms and then back up to her face. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine. I’m okay. Josh…”

His lips were on hers again, warm and comforting and more than a little urgent. She wanted to lose herself in him, find comfort in a way she hadn’t been able to for so long. More than anything, she craved his skin against hers. More than she wanted to know why he’d gone or where he’d been or what his future plans were. She just needed him in a way she couldn’t explain. She only knew that she felt like she’d come home when she was with him. After all this time, he was still the person that made her feel more herself than anyone else.

It felt like seconds and decades at the same time, but finally, their frantic make out session ended and they could look at each other more fully. She had a million questions, but the most important was the one she managed to blurt as he studied her with his hazel gaze.

“Do you love me?”

He raised his hand to her left cheek and traced her cheekbone with his thumb. His eyes flickered over her, and his lips curved into a smirk. “Of course, I love you,” he laughed. “I always have. I’ve been an idiot—worse, I’ve been a complete ass—but I’ve been in love with you for a decade.”

“I live in New York. I’m not moving.”

“I’ve already got my plane ticket back there. I was just staying with Connor through the holidays.”

“I don’t trust you.”

“I don’t blame you. I haven’t been very trustworthy, and I’m sorry.”

She glared at him, but she couldn’t find her anger. His presence was a balm she hadn’t even known she’d needed. When he’d left, she’d thought it was the end of their love, but maybe tonight was really the beginning. If the last decade had taught her nothing else, everything was a gamble. Maybe she had another big one left in her.

“Hey, Hutch.”

“Yeah?” It felt like the world around them was holding its breath.

“Take me home.”

When he reached for her hand, she took it.

****

The drive to his brother’s apartment seemed to take forever and not nearly long enough. She wasn’t nervous, exactly, but it had been over a year since he’d left. How would it feel to be with him again after all this time and so much pain between them?

“Connor’s out with friends tonight. Spending the night with his boyfriend,” Josh announced as they pulled into a parking spot.

“Okay,” she replied and sucked in a breath to hold. At least they wouldn’t have an audience for their reunion.

“We don’t have to do anything,” he said, and she raised her eyes to his. Vulnerability poured from him, and she suddenly wanted to soothe him. She had the ability to provide him comfort, and that’s what she wanted more than anything else in that moment.

“I want to do everything,” she answered firmly.

He led her up the stairs to his brother’s apartment and unlocked the door. When they were inside, he tossed his keys on the table and turned to her. She went to him, and he pulled her close. His arms wrapped around her back to nestle her against his chest. Slowly, he lifted her chin and pressed his lips against hers.

It was a chaste kiss, but it lit a fire inside her. She deepened the kiss by tilting her head and opening her mouth. Her tongue begged for attention, and he slid his against hers. His muffled grunt was matched by her lusty moan, and the thin veil of control they clung to snapped.

“Jennifer,” he sighed. Their hands grappled with their clothing as it fell piece by piece. Frantic, she hopped onto the kitchen table and tucked him between her legs. He rubbed her quickly, just a tiny bit of prep, and then he was inside her, thrusting with his head thrown back. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hung on as he rammed into her. The table creaked under them, and she gripped him inside her tighter and tighter as he plunged erratically into her depths.

“Fuck!” he shouted to the ceiling when his body tensed. He sank into her, and she felt a wet heat pulsing inside her when he came.

She cradled him to her, grateful for his warmth in the chilling apartment, until he came back to himself. His mouth sought hers in a lazy journey across her cheek until they were kissing and kissing and then kissing more and more and more. She couldn’t get enough of him. He surrounded her, made her feel like she’d found everything she needed, and grounded her to the present.

“I love you,” he mumbled against her lips. “I’m so sorry for leaving you.”

She whimpered, both at his words, and him pulling out of her, but that turned to a forceful howl when he sank to his knees in front of her. She spread her legs further, and he leaned forward. Falling back on the table, she pressed her eyes closed and allowed herself to float. His tongue and fingers and lips and facial hair all worked to drive her over the edge, and she gripped the edge of the table as an orgasm rushed through her. Panting, she begged him to keep going.

He took his time, nuzzling against her until she writhed under him. He prodded her legs into different positions, interspersed sucking on her clit with shoving his fingers inside her until she was wailing. She couldn’t control the sounds that poured from her any more than she could stop from climaxing multiple times as he took her apart.

She lost track of time, of her name, of her roles and responsibilities. Nothing mattered but him on her, connected and intertwined in a way she always wanted them to be, that they’d never quite managed when they held back from each other. For the first time in ages, she felt he was completely open to her, and she responded in kind. Any inhibitions she still held fell away, and she ground against his face harder and harder.

“Josh, I need more,” she whined, desperate for him to be inside her again.

He stumbled to his feet and scooped her from the table. Half-carrying, half-supporting her, he walked them across the room to the ratty couch in the living room. Woozily, she glanced at the rumpled blankets and sheets where he’d obviously been sleeping and sank onto his lap when he sat.

“You deserve so much better than a shitty couch in a rundown apartment. I’m sorry—”

“Stop apologizing,” she slurred and kissed him. “I forgive you. I love you, too. Now, fuck me.”

Josh buried his face in her neck and guided her thighs to the outside of his. She sank onto him and rocked her hips, meeting his stroke with hers. She rode him, then, bouncing and moaning his name, clutching his hair and raking her nails down his back as they raced to the finish. They reached it together, clinging to each other as they panted each other’s names. Her back bowed, and she dove over the edge, reaching for him, clinging to the man she’d met so many years ago, who’d helped her discover who she really was, what she believed in, and how she could fight for those principles. She didn’t want anyone else to take his place, and this time she’d battle for him as long as she needed to keep him by her side.

When they finished, they lay together, hearts beating rapidly, and caressed every inch of bare skin they could reach. They made promises and plans, both grandiose and mundane, but most importantly, they made a pledge.

Despite everything, there wouldn’t be the end of love. Instead, they were at the beginning.

#the vintage joshifer series #end of love #joshifer #joshifer fanfiction #joshifersource #joshiferrecs #jhutchdirectory #fyeah-joshifer #1960s

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saltpepperbeard · 5 years

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lovely-tothe-bone replied to your post:hey pssst @archersandsunsets-I can’t be...

This sounds angsty. I am not happy. *Grumpy Kat scowl*

#lovely-tothe-bone #Joshifer fanfiction #Also me? Writing angsty Joshifer? IT'S MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK LOL #i feel like #these days if and WHEN if ever write them #it's always either angst or like SUPER HELLA INTENSE pining #or BOTH LMAO???#Which is what this one happens to be #i think it's my way of like #Coping TM with current events lmao #and what they've left us with #like back in the day there was more hope so my stories were WAY fluffier #but nowadays it's like #*belts* I STILL SEE YOUR SHADOW IN MY ROOM

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lostinthedarknesssaga · 3 years

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♪ It hurts to know the truth

Are you looking for saviours

Chasing a dream

Love turned to hate... ღ

— 🥀 —

Jennifer and Josh in this book are enemies. Sean (Josh) hates Serena (Jennifer) because she is a demon. Sean and Serena met for first time at school. Sean’s father wanted Serena for himself and he used his son to brought her closer to him but John was there and protected her. When John lost her after years, Sean found her again and he used her to create demon children. In the 3rd book there is a rape scene, Sean rapes Serena but one of demons drags him away, Serena takes her revenge but after months when Sean tries to harm her again she is ready to kill him when John (Keanu) convinces her not to, for their daughter’s sake. Their daughter Sophia, meets for one time her real father Sean, but John is the one who raises her. She hates Sean for what he did to her mother, and in the end she chooses John for her father and calls him “dad”.

Lost In The Darkness Saga FanFiction 📖

♡ 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬: 𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐃𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬' 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝

♡ 𝐋𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐬: 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐓𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Originals:

Serena McLeod by Jennifer Lawrence

Passengers x The House at the End of the Street

John Hawk by Keanu Reeves / John Wick Chapter: 3

Sean Darkholme by Josh Hutcherson

The Future Man x Canon Clip

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jhutchmyanchor · 7 years

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Attention Joshifer Fanfiction Authors

Banner was made by the wonderful Sammy @joshua-ryans!

I have a Joshifer fanfiction authors list on my blog. It is a great resource! Many people on Tumblr use it and it’s a great way to discover new authors. I look for the authors myself, but sometimes I need help.

If you would like me to add you, please message me or reblog this message with your info. All of you are amazing and I would love to add you to my list.

Here is my list if you want to check it out:

Joshfier Fanfiction Authors

Please reblog this and spread the word! Thank you!

#joshifer #joshifer fanfiction #rachel's lists

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mikeysgerard · 6 years

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when you find a fanfic of your otp that you haven’t read yet

#otp #fanfiction #fanfiction problems #new fanfic #shipping #everlark #phan #frerard #frikey #waycest #joshifer #fandom #fandom problems #klaine #finchel #crisscolfer #glee

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italk-too-much · 7 years

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Listen / resd the lyrics to Sam Hunt's "House Party" and tell me that doesn't have Josh if error written all over it. Also consider this a joshifet prompt. :-)

Hey anon! So I’ve been considering this a Joshifer prompt for far too long now and have finally managed to get it done. Sticking to my new years resolution and getting this done! I kind of combined with another idea I’d given myself (the bit about chicken nuggets if you wanted to know) so I hope I’ve not deviated from the song too much! Thank you so much for sending this to me! I hope you like it! PS that song, and the video (it reminds me of Josh’s Treehouse, just me?) definitely do have Joshifer written alllll over it!

Unbeta’d as usual so all mistakes, also as usual, are nine mine.

___________________________

House Party...

I’m bored. I’m bored but I don’t want to move and I definitely don’t want to leave the couch, never mind the house. I sigh, making my lips pout and vibrate against each other, the noise covering the argument on the TV. Not even Real Housewives is cutting it tonight. I want to doooo something.

“I’m borrrrred.” I text, and toss my phone to the couch cushion beside me, groaning as I stretch. I put the heels of my hands to my eyes, mostly for something to do. I’m not tired at all. I thought I would be, I thought I’d get home from working today and not want to even talk to anyone but it turns out I feel exactly the opposite. And there’s been only me in the house all night, talking to the walls, trying not to drink too much alone.

The screen lights up and I pounce on it.

“Should’ve came out then, little homebody.”

“I thought I’d be tired and go to bed. But I don’t wannaaaa.”

I puff a little laugh but worry that I might be coming across as a pathetic and very whiny school girl. I quickly send another message.

“When will you be home?”

But I don’t want him to leave his friends early either. I send another.

“No hurry, don’t think that means come home for me... does saying that make me sound like I want you to come home for me? Please don’t. Stay out and have fun X”

I groan again and give myself an actual, physical shake. What is wrong with me? I’m fed up, I answer myself.

My phone flashes and doesn’t stop. He’s calling me now. Dammit, he’ll be leaving early. I feel so stupid. I should’ve just let him have -

“Hey!”

“How bored are you?” He laughs. “You never pick up on the first ring.”

I huff. “Bored enough.”

He laughs again and I smile, my defensive tone slipping. “How un-bored are you?”

“Un-bored enough.”

I can hear him smirking and I know he senses the roll of my eyes and mocking wiggle of my head when I hear him chuckle again.

“Jen, how tired are you? Like seriously, are you a “Josh come home so we can chill together” bored, or a “I’m bouncing off the ceiling” bored?”

I snort and swing my legs up on to the sofa, bending them into me. “Second one. Definitely the second one.”

“Good. Don’t change, we only have like ten minutes.”

“What? What are you talking about? Don’t come home early, Josh, I’ll feel bad!”

“No, I’m not coming home early. We’re bringing the party to you!”

I hear the sounds of cheers around him and have to pull the phone a few inches from my ear as I wait for them to die. I grin and a jolt of anticipation runs through me. “You’re serious?”

“A hundred percent. Turn off the TV and get the speakers out. We’ll be there soon.”

“You’re an idiot,” I smile into the phone.

“I know,” he replies. “I love you too.”

“Don’t think that doesn’t mean you’re not clearing up in the morning. Your house -”

“Our house,” he corrects smugly. I can hear him and a bunch of other voices moving, the buzz of car engines. They’re on their way.

“Yeah well... this is your party, your idea... but yes, I do love you, you dork.”

I hang up and look at my clothes. A white button down shirt and some grey sweatpants from when I could no longer be bothered with my jeans, but didn’t want to get fully changed cause that meant I would be going to bed. I’ve long since showered and taken off my make-up, but my hair is dry at least. I shrug. He said keep what I’m wearing on, and I don’t care all that much anyway. I plug in the speakers and stick my iPod in. It’ll get changed no doubt within a half hour of people getting here so I just let it stay on shuffle. I stick some chips in a bowl and put it on the kitchen counter half-assed and decide we can just order pizza later. It’s been so long since we’ve had or been to a house party and I’m just checking that we have ice when I hear them pull up outside and I nearly burst with something resembling nerves, relief and/or excitement.

I’m dying. Actually dying.

No, this is worse. I think I’d rather be dead. I’ve never felt so bad, nothing has ever come close to this. I hate me.

I roll over slowly and oh so gingerly, feeling like a dead weight and as though my head is made of iron. Everything hurts. The room spins, even though my eyes are still shut. “Dammit,” I breathe gently.

He’s beside me and I scrunch an eye open only slightly to confirm it but keep excessive light away. Yup. He is still asleep yet he doesn’t look peaceful. He looks how I feel. God, what did we do last night?

In fact, I don’t even want to know right now. I close my eyes again and scrunch my nose as my stomach lurches. No. I will not puke. Slowly, I slide one leg then the other across the mattress and then lift my shoulders and ease the rest of my body over too as smoothly as I can. The roundabout doesn’t stop and I keep spinning - getting faster even - until I return to a speed I can bare with. I take my arm and gently place it over to where I know his torso will be, and lower my head to his shoulder with a sigh. And then I curl in close and wish for death.

“Mojrnfing,” Josh speaks groggily and I have no idea what words he attempted to speak.

“Mwhat?” I’m just as groggy and my voice sounds as gruff as sandpaper, my mouth as dry as a carpet in the Sahara.

He swallows and clears is throat but doesn’t move, his mouth still next to my ear and his chest pressed against my back. “Morn-ing.”

“Is it?” I ask, raising an eyebrow and then regretting my decision to move that much.

Josh laughs once and then inhales sharply.

“Oh Josh, please don’t puke on me. I can’t move if you do.”

“I won’t.” He presses his lips to the sweet spot under my ear. “You’re probably right. About it not being morning. I don’t want to look.”

A wave of nausea hits me and I feel disorientated again. For a moment I think it might be me running to go puke, but just like a wave trails away back to sea, it passes as I exhale. “Me neither.”

We stay like this for a few minutes, pressed together and silent but for our breaths and sighs and occasional moans as our heads pound. I know we need to get up and drink some water and take some kind of medication in a bid to make the awfulness of this hangover go away but I don’t think I have it in me to. My face is smooshed against the pillow and I’m pretty sure i can feel some dried in drool along my cheek. My hair is splayed everywhere and my sleep shorts are on backwards. I don’t have a top on, only my bra, and Josh is only in his boxers.

“Want to try and sit up?”

“Not really,” I mumble in a pitiful voice nothing like my own.

“I’ll make… I dunno what I’ll make, but I’ll make something.” Josh inhales sharply through his nose and rises. It takes him far longer than usual, and he sits on the edge of the bed a moment before he stands, but he has beaten me in making it to a non-horizontal position. I miss him against me and roll over to his side to take up his remaining warmth.

“Okay,” he speaks slowly. “It’s not as bad as I thought. You want anything?”

I give a tiny nod and then begin to open my eyes again now that I am facing away from the window. I vow not to close them this time. I let my mind reel through foods and drinks that I might want and then stop when I think of the only possible thing I could be after right now. “McDonalds,” I state firmly. “Cheese burger, fries, chicken nuggets… and a milkshake.”

“Strawberry,” we both say at the same time and I grin before sliding up to sit in bed. I watch Josh as he tosses on an old tee and some jeans quickly.

He pinches the bridge of his nose and scrunches his eyes, using his thumbs to rub away sleep from them before he comes back to me. “I won’t be long,” he says, his voice still all gravely and throaty. I nod and wind my fingers around the back of his neck past his ear as he gives me a sweet, but quick kiss.

“I promise to be out of bed for you coming home,” I say as we pull away and he makes for the door.

When he doesn’t make a joke about me staying in bed for him to join me I know he is very very hungover. And I know I am too because I didn’t even mean for him to be able to make that kind of joke.

I allow myself two more minutes in the safety of the bedcovers before I throw them back quickly and carefully swing my legs and myself out of bed. My head spins again and I stand frozen to regain my bearings. I reach first for Josh’s shirt and pull it on over my head. I kick off my sleep shorts and pull on some leggings - the right way around this time, I check three times.

I’m just pulling my hair up into a hair tie when I hear Josh pulling up. By the time he is back in our bedroom, I have put our discarded clothes into the laundry, started up the washer, made coffee and tidied our bedroom to make a cosy nest for the two of us hungover messes. I know we won’t be moving far from here today.

We unpack the brown paper bag, and get comfy on the bed again. We sigh as we sink on top of the duvet and against the pillows, my stomach flipping and growling at the same time. I bite into my burger and know that this is definitely the only thing that is going to cure me today.

“Do you have any idea what happened last night?” I say swallowing.

Josh frowns and finishes his bite too before speaking. “It’s…. hazy. There was wine… and champagne… I think we were dancing.”

I nod. “I remember champagne… Did I get us shots? Oh my God - I kept getting us shots of whisky!” I groan at myself and the mention of the poison now. Normally I’d take whisky no problem, but shots? And with champagne?

“Didn’t you break a glass as well?”

I laugh. “Probably, but I wouldn’t need to have drank anything for that.”

Josh laughs too with an agreeing bob of his head. “I think you were singing in the backyard. Like loudly…”

I feel my body chill and my face grow cold as I remember. “Did the police show up?”

I watch as Josh’s face turns to slightly guilty. “Noise complaint… I’d put the music on too loud... They were pretty reasonable though.”

I try to feel guilt but the severity of how hungover we are is definitely punishment enough and I can’t help but bursting out laughing when I catch Josh’s eye as he grins. We have one party and the police stop by. We’re lucky we didn’t get shut down.

We carry on eating ourselves back to health, and I feel myself getting sleepy again as I finish my burger and fries. I snuggle in close to Josh again and allow the steadiness of his breathing to lull me back to dosing as we watch some Friends reruns.

When I waken again, I do so with a start, my head shooting up and Josh starting at my sudden movements. He opens his mouth to ask but before he can, I mumble. “I forgot I still have chicken nuggets,” through a slack, sleepy mouth and wide but bleary eyes.

I see him smile widely and chuckle at me as I untangle myself from him. I sit up beside him again, though not quite straight and find my packet. They’re still fairly warm. I get through them at a steady pace, taking in some more of the room as I do. Josh has switched from Friends to some sports show. It’s late afternoon, the sun is fading again.

Crumpling the empty wrapper in my fist, I toss it to the end of the bed where it lands and then rolls right off. I roll my eyes and vow to get it later, just not now. I flop back down beside and a little on top of Josh and close my eyes once more, letting sleep overtake me in a matter of minutes.

#Anonymous #joshifer #joshifer fanfic #joshifer fanfiction #i wrote a thing #finally eh?#italk-too-much

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rupertgrintsweasleycharm · 6 years

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Late night thought

There should be a book named "tumblr" and it should contain every story to fan theories to fan fictions etc. omg I would legit be the first in line to buy this book. Tumblr has the most intellectual people of this planet.

#tumblr #stories #fanfictions #artists on tumblr #fandom #fantheories #harrypotter #JOSHIFER

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lawrliciouss · 7 years

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Work on progress!! ‘Lost in the Darkness Saga’ Fanfiction - Book Cover 🖤🖤🖤🖤 What would happened if Crowley, King of Hell, had a daughter? Demon Girl’s story in the Supernatural Universe! ☠️☠️☠️☠️

#jenniferlawrence #keanureeves #josh hutcherson #chloe grace moretz #mackenzie foy #joshifer #johnwick #johnwick2 #fanfiction #fanfic #supernatural #spn #spn rp #spnfamily #crowley

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theunforgivingaudrey · 7 years

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Reunited

*Attention: This fanfiction was written before passengers came out and before the rumours about Jen dating Darren started… So, the passengers premiere is set in London and Jen is single. I hope you enjoy this fanfic!*

The last time I saw him, he smiled at me. I will never forget how happy he looked, even though I know that he was sad. Sad because he knew he would leave me forever. Mockingjay Part 2 was over and with this movie, all those great moments ended too. Moments with Josh. I miss him. Now, about an year later, I still want to see him again but I know it’s impossible. I’m busy; he’s busy. When should we meet or anything? I remember the last night we had, his soft lips against my skin, the heat in the air. His lip between my teeth. His arms around me and his hands touching me like nobody touched me before. I mean, I wasn’t a virgin, I do had sex before multiple times but with Josh, it felt better. It was more exciting. He was more exciting. The last night wasn’t our first, Josh and I made love before too but this last night was special because I knew that I had to choose whether I fuck him and never see him again or wether I ask him to be my boyfriend what I had wished for so long… But I couldn’t ask him. Those times, he broke up with Claudia about three weeks ago and the same time we started our “thing”, Claudia started to fight for Josh. She really wanted him back, I felt it. But me, I also wanted Josh. At last, Josh told Claudia he broke up with her and she should leave him alone. The last night we shared a bed, I waited for the perfect moment to ask him if he wants to be my boyfriend. But this “perfect” moment never came, so I missed asking him. And now he’s gone. And I’ll never ever see him again.

It is the day of the premier of The Passengers. I feel a little uncomfortable because everyone around me came with their partners and I’m the only person without anyone. Sure, I asked some of my friends and family to go with me to the premier but nobody had the time to come. I guess that’s why I’m more nervous than usually. The day passes by and nothing really remarkable happens. I’m just smiling, posing, writing autographs until my hands hurt and talking with interviewers, that’s all. I really do love my fans but it’s very hard to sign everything and I must say my hands are quite glad when it is over. “Jennifer!” I hear someone screaming. “Jen!” I turn around, maybe it’s a fan who wants me to sign something. But as I look at the person who called out my name, I suddenly freeze and can’t believe my eyes. I’d recognize him anywhere. It’s Joshua Fucking Ryan Hutcherson. I’d say I’m a tough girl. I’m not one of those who is crying like all the time about unecessary things. But as my eyes meet Josh’s, as I see him smiling, his wonderful eyes looking at me… As I realize how much I missed him, I burst into tears. He hugs me carefully and rubs his hand over my back. “Jen, why are you crying?”, he asks. I can’t answer, so I shake my head and try as good as I can not to wet Josh’s clothing. He should be upset about me crying and obviously ruining his jacket. He should laugh about me being weak. There are thousands of ways how he should react but instead of all those ways, he pulls me closer. “Jen”, he whispers in my ear softly and kisses my cheek. “What are you doing here?” I ask. “Last year, I wanted to tell you something… but I missed the perfect moment, so…” Josh looks at me. He wants to go on telling me what he had missed to say for so long but as he opens his mouth, another interviewer comes over to us and smiles at me. “Jennifer, what a pleasure to meet you!”, he says and I can feel Josh taking a step aware of me. “And as I see you brought Josh with you! Nice to meet you two! Are you guys a couple or is he still just your best friend?”, the interviewer asks and I get a little angry. Josh was about to tell me something important before this fucking dumb interviewer showed up…! I neither want to talk about what I’m wearing today (obviously Dior) nor about the movie nor about my friendship with Josh! But there’s no escape, so I wipe my tears away and try to fix my makeup as good as I can without a mirror and turn to the interviewer. “Hi”, I say in a happy tone “nice to meet you too!” After answering thousands of questions, I feel as if I’m just a zoo attraction. I know, this is how it feels like to be famous but I could live without that. All I wanna do is acting, that’s all. When the interviewer leaves, I’m returning to Josh. My throat is dry and I hope we’ll get something to drink soon. “We’ll probably meet at the After Party”, Josh says and rubs my back once again. It’s not enough, I want to feel him. I want to feel his lips on my body, his fingers playing with my hair and his legs between mine. I want to love him like nobody ever did before; I want to hold him till the next day and promise him that I’ll always love him no matter what. But all I do is saying: “Yeah. Probably.” I could slap me for this. He leaves to get in his car and I’m alone again. I’m not sure if I really want to go to the After show but it’s the only way to meet Josh. So I take a taxi to the party which is set in a big house at the other side of London.

The air is hot when I enter, a lot of people are dancing on the dancefloor and the first thing I do is ordering a tequila. I don’t know if Josh is already in here or not, so I walk around searching him. The room is very full, that’s why it’s very difficult to walk and to find Josh. When I get through the crowd, I finally see him. He stands with his back to me, a few feet next to me. I walk faster and when I arrive him, I put my hand down at his shoulder. He turns to me and the moment he recognize me, he smiles. “You look wonderful, Jen” he says, adoring my dress… Or my body? I can’t exactly say it but I feel Josh’s gaze on my breasts. Gosh, I’d give everything for Josh touching me there…! Forget this whole fucking idea, Jen. There are a lot of people around you who don’t want to see you and him fucking! “I’d love to dance with you” I tell him instead of kissing his face. “But Jen, did you forget? I can’t dance!” he responses, laughing. “Good, so I won’t be the only person who looks crazy and ridiculous.” I grab his hand hand take him over to the dancefloor. A few songs and some tequilas later, I feel the drinks coming back. I run out of this awful room with a way too many people in it and throw up in a bush when we’ve finally found one where thrown up stuff can’t be seen obviously. While I’m puking, Josh holds my hair so it doesn’t get dirty by my vomit. When I’ve finished, he wants to go back to the party but I refuse to follow him. “I don’t wanna go back, Josh” I say. “Okay but what shall we do instead?” he asks. “Come with me” I beg him. So we take a taxi and get to my hotel room.

“What did you wanna tell me?” I ask. Josh and I are laying on the couch next to a very big pizza box. When we came here, we ordered pizza but now we’ve eaten all and I’m very excited to hear what he wants to tell me so badly that he flew from America to London. “I, er…” Josh stops, shaking his head. “Sorry Jen. I can’t tell you. You’re drunk, this whole thing wouldn’t make any sense. You wouldn’t remember it tomorrow” he goes on. I suddenly feel a little disappointed but also guilty because I shouldn’t be disappointed. I’m sure Josh didn’t want to tell me that he, um, I don’t know, loved me or something. Well, it’d be awesome if he wanted to say this but I don’t expect him to. “Okay” I reply, walking out of the room to get a blanket for us. As I return, Josh still lays on the couch. I hand him the blanket and ask: “May I sleep with you tonight?” He nods in agreement and offers me the left couch side. I lie down and give him a hug. Then I turn around, my back to Josh, and whisper “Goodnight, Joshy.” “Goodnight, Jen.” Josh’s breath in my neck is the last thing I notice before I doze off…

The next morning, I wake up early. It’s about 5:30 or 6 AM and first, I wonder who’s behind me but then recognize Josh. We’re both dressed, what means that we haven’t had sex yesterday. Josh still lies behind me and his hands are covering my boobs. I smile. It feels good but it isn’t enough, I need more. I turn around to Josh and wake him. “Jen…” he murmurs, his eyes half-closed. I don’t care that he’s still tired, maybe this is also the reason why I do what I wanted to do yesterday… I kiss him on his mouth. It feels so amazing to be with him again… There’s a heat in the air, I also noticed yesterday and I fucking don’t care about any causes. I want more. But Josh interrupts the kiss. “Jen… What I was going to say yesterday… before the interviewer showed up… I had much time to think about my life and I’ve recognized that the happiest moments of my life, I’ve spent with my brother… And with you. I had girlfriends before but they weren’t like you. You are amazing. You are strong and tough. When The Hunger Games were over, I thought every day about you, Jen. And I’ve missed you with every day even more, so… At the last day of our premiere tour, I wanted to tell you something but I missed the perfect moment. I love you, Jen. I don’t know if you feel the same or not but I love you. I just wanted you to know this. I’ve enough of our “sister-brother-siblings-shit”; if you love me too, would you like to be my girlfriend?“ I’m touched. I really am. I mean, deep in the inside, I did expected something like this. But… I don’t know. Just to hear it in reality makes my wish come true. "I also wanted to tell you something and I also missed it” I start. “I love you too, Josh. And in this fucking crazy world there’s nothing I’d rather want than being your girlfriend!” He smiles at me and our lips connect a second time this morning. Josh lifts me up and takes me on his chest. I’m kissing his eyelids, his cheeks, his forehead, his nose. He takes off my dress so I just wear my bra and my underwear. I take off his shirt and kiss his neck. He’s moaning and pulls me closer. The stirring inside of my chest is growing, I’m kissing his face and he removes my bra. “Jen, you look so beautiful. Your body is perfect and your character is even better. I love you. Why did we broke up our relationship back then?” “To be honest, I don’t know. Maybe because it wasn’t really a relationship. We just fucked around and that was it” I reply and with this words I know that this was the reason. “Anyway” I say and pull Josh to me again. My breasts are crashing into his chest and I let out a moan. He holds me tighter and I know, he won’t let me go and he’ll love me no matter what…

#jennifer lawrence #josh hutcherson #joshifer #fanfiction #jennifer lawrence fanfiction #josh hutcherson fanfiction #joshifer fanfiction #lawsbians #passengers #premiere #chris pratt #aurora lane

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hutchhitched · 4 years

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The Vintage Joshifer Series: End of Love—Chapter 20

End of Love by hutchhitched

Hey, all! For those of you still interested in this story and/or Joshifer, I’ve finally finished it! This is the penultimate chapter. Chapter 21 will post next Tuesday. It’s already written, so no delay this time. I am beyond grateful my muse chose to grace during the month of July, and I’m equally thrilled to put this story to rest after next week. Even though the events in this chapter took place a little over five decades ago, current unrest in New York, Oregon, and a number of other places are reminiscent of the struggles of those years ago. It’s disheartening, but this story has always been a little too close to current events. I know I’ve said this often, but the fight’s not over.

Historical events in this chapter include the following:

The Stonewall Riots began on June 28, 1969 at the Stonewall Inn, a well-known gay bar, in Greenwich Village in New York City. Gay patrons, tired of frequent police mistreatment and brutality, fought back when police raided the bar. The struggle evolved into a six day civil rights protest and ushered in what is known as “gay pride.” The words of Jennifer’s news report comes from an article in the New York Times on June 28, 1970. I took some artistic license by including it a year prior in the story.

WNBC is the local NBC affiliate for New York City. It gained its call letters in 1960.

There was a massive presence of African American trans activists involved in the Stonewall Riots. I don’t include that in Josh’s experience because I wanted to keep him close to his friend’s character in the story, but intersectionality studies have done a wonderful job at providing a better look at the true historical picture of Stonewall.

The Stonewall Inn is still a working bar in New York City. I was able to visit in the days following the legalization of gay marriage in the United States in June 2015.

Last but not least, the Woodstock Music Festival took place in August 1969 near Bethel, New York. It was a three day music festival that was the pinnacle of the counterculture movement in the United States.

New York City, New York, June 1969

“Where’s your friend’s place?” Connor asked as he and Josh exited the subway and onto Seventh Avenue. “I’m ready to put this bag down and get to the bar.”

Josh grinned at his younger brother as they hoofed it south to Andre’s apartment. It had been much too long since Josh had experienced all the city had to offer, and he was looking forward to trying to forget his broken heart in booze and weed and meaningless sex. As if any of that actually dulled the pain he felt every time he thought about Jennifer. Which was every second of every single day.

“Quit being so impatient. We’ve got nothing else to do besides party for days. Happy graduation, bro,” he said with a clap on Connor’s shoulder. “And we’re here.”

Andre buzzed them up, and Josh tried to hide his happiness at being reunited with his friend. They hadn’t seen each other since the concert in New Haven before… Before he went back to Chicago and fell into domestic bliss with Jennifer and lost himself in the process. If he could figure out how to go back and do it over, he would, but the fact was that he wasn’t a good boyfriend. Monogamy wasn’t his thing, and nothing about the months he’d spent in the Midwest made him think he could balance his personal life with activism. He wasn’t good at splitting his attention between two things, especially when one was a leggy blonde whose pussy made him want to worship between her legs for days. Besides that, he was in love with her, and it scared the shit out of him.

“Good to see you, man,” Andre huffed through their hug. “I need a catch up on everything since we last talked. Been out in Cali with your bro, huh?”

“Yeah, Andre you remember Connor. Connor, Andre. Out at Stanford with him. Just trying to find my way back.”

“Back to what?”

“Let’s smoke a bowl first. Then I’ll tell you. It’s too much right now.”

An hour later, the three were sprawled across the living room as smoke hung heavy in the air. Josh felt his bones dissolve and his head float into a happy space, one where he wasn’t a fuck up or a failure. Instead, he was that idealistic kid from Kentucky who genuinely believed he could change the world, shape it into something that was just for everyone, including Andre and his own brother, who’d come out since Josh joined him in Stanford. He hadn’t wasted 1968 in bed with Jenn. He hadn’t failed to help change the minds of those who looked down on others as inferior.

“I went to Chicago. You know that,” he spoke into the haze swirling above his head. “I found her. She was beautiful. Is beautiful, and she’s so talented. So much more herself than she was at Berkeley. I’m so proud of her. She’s a reporter on the local NBC station. Reported on the DNC protests and made a name for herself, but me… Things didn’t go so well for me. Chicago chewed me up and spit me out and ruined me. She ruined me. Except she didn’t. She saved me. I lost myself, and I was dragging her down with me. I couldn’t do that to her. I had to leave, to give her space to really shine, and to figure out how the fuck to find myself again because I’m so lost. I don’t know how to fight anymore. How to stand up for what’s right when I know I’m not doing that for her. I don’t deserve her, man. I don’t, and I couldn’t drag her down anymore. So, I left. I wrote a note, and I ran. Haven’t talked to her since.”

His voice trailed into silence, but the music continued to pulse. Andre nodded, clearly working through the information, and Connor closed his eyes and rolled his head from side to side. Nothing Josh had said made him feel any better. All he’d done was be honest about his actions. He wasn’t looking for approval, and he wasn’t looking for advice. The best thing he could do was leave her alone to succeed and thrive on her own.

He told himself that later that night when he picked up a woman in the bar and fucked her in the bathroom. He repeated that mantra when his brother decided to return to California and leave him in New York to find a job. He insisted he was being honest with himself when he switched on the local news and realized Jen had transferred to New York. And then he reiterated it when he agreed to join Andre for drinks at the Stonewall Inn.

****

Josh swept his dark hair out of his eyes and pulled it back into a ponytail. He chuckled at the thought of what his dad would say if he saw his elder son’s hairstyle. Chris had always been loving and supportive outside of his frustration over his injury, but that didn’t mean he thought men should wear long hair. It was shaggier than Josh was used to. At some point, he needed a haircut, but he couldn’t seem to justify paying for something so mundane when there were a million other things that were more important. He was itching for a cause to support in a meaningful way, and it felt like something was coming.

The air itself was heavy. New York City in the summer was often full of heat and humidity and that day was no different. The temperatures hung in the mid-90s well into the later afternoon as he made his way south through Greenwich Village toward the gay bar Andre frequented.

It felt good to be in the city. Even though he’d never lived there, it felt right somehow to be in the cradle of counterculture, even if he’d gotten a little too comfortable with the status quo during his months in Chicago.

Seven months since he’d seen her in person. He still couldn’t think about what she’d felt when she found his note, how she’d crumbled when she realized he wasn’t coming back. He knew she’d been waiting for it. Despite his irresponsible actions and inability to commit, he understood Jen better than he did himself. She’d known he was going to run, had been preparing for it the entire time they’d spent together, and he’d proven her right.

Being without her was terrible for him, but it was everything she deserved. She was too good for him, always had been. Even when she was spoiled and selfish, she’d had class and an innate kindness that he’d never be able to emulate. Josh strolled the last short distance with a wry grin gracing his face. He allowed himself the length of the block to beat himself up, and then he plastered on a smile and waltzed through the door of the Stonewall Inn.

The bar was dark with bulky furniture and a long row of stools framing the shiny wooden counter. Bartenders pulled beer and mixed drinks quickly and served them with flirtatious smirks that elicited copious tips. Andre called his name from the back, and Josh twisted his way through laughing groups of men who were finally able to relax in a world that wasn’t ready to accept them.

“My man,” he said as he tugged Andre into a hug and was then introduced to the rest of the group. He tried to remember their names, but the words were lost in the din of the club. He ordered a beer and sat back to listen as his friend interacted with the other men.

“Things are worse,” Andre insisted. “There hasn’t been a raid in a while, but it’s only a matter of time before the pigs show up again.”

“It’s shit,” another man agreed and tucked his blonde hair behind his ears. “Sometimes I wonder if we ought to do something about it. Fight back next time or take it to the streets.”

Andre seemed more relaxed than Josh had ever seen him as the group discussed the political climate of the nation. Advances in equal rights for a number of groups hinted that change could be in the near future for gays and lesbians, too, but it was understandable that the bar’s patrons didn’t trust the nation’s power structures. And why would they? There’d been so little progress for the gay community since McCarthyism and the oppression of the decade before.

Josh lost track of time as he drank and listened. He contributed when he felt like he had something to say, but he mostly enjoyed hearing about the movement from insiders instead of trying to insert himself. Despite his close friendship with Andre and his own brother’s coming out a few months prior, he didn’t have a lot of contact with men who were attracted to other men. He’d always loved the female form, although he’d considered sexual attraction to the same sex. Somehow, it had never happened, and he didn’t feel like forcing something would do any good. He’d rather be supportive of those who had those feelings that try to be someone he wasn’t.

A tussle by the door caught his attention. Andre and the others at the table tensed, and Josh felt the hair on his arms rise. Something was happening, although he wasn’t sure what.

“It’s a raid,” Andre muttered as he rose and pushed Josh behind him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, it’s a raid. The pigs are here.”

Josh watched in disbelief as police swarmed into the bar and yelled at the patrons. Drinks spilled, and men scrambled as police batons emerged and landed on those sitting at the bar. Time seemed to slow down, and he watched in disbelief as a brawl broke out in front of him. He’d drunk too much; that much was clear, but he felt like he was in a dream. Drifting along beside Andre, he joined the protest, raising his voice next to his friend and others he didn’t know. He yelled and marched and raised his fist as the streets became a battleground. He watched as those around him sparked with pride and celebrated their liberation.

He hadn’t felt the rush of working for something that mattered for so long, and it felt amazing. This wasn’t his personal fight, but it also was. What could be more personal than standing against police brutality and for the rights of everyone?

As the sun rose over the horizon, Andre and he stumbled home and slept for a few hours before rejoining the fray. For the next three days, he felt himself coming alive. When the police beat him, he curled in on himself and ignored the pain, and when it was all over, he lay in Andre’s apartment and realized he had to stop running. He’d left Chicago because he wasn’t worthy of Jen’s love, and he’d done nothing in the seven months since to change that. He needed a purpose, and he had to stop waiting for one to come to him. Instead, he had to go find it.

****

But then suddenly she was there on his television—Andre’s television—and he forgot everything except how much he missed her. He gaped at the screen as she talked and tried to quell the ache in his gut.

“…today’s remnants of the riots from Greenwich Village. A reminder, thousands of young men and women homosexuals from all over the Northeast marched from the Village to the Sheep Meadow in Central Park three days ago, proclaiming ‘the new strength of pride of the gay people.’ This movement, which some are calling gay pride, rejects the oppression of gay men and women and demands equal treatment and respect in society and under the law.

Thousands have taken to the streets, marching and protesting against police brutality and raids of gay bars and clubs. I’ve spoken to a number of protestors, and each reminds me that this movement has been long in the making. Stay tuned for further coverage. In the Village, I’m Jennifer Lawrence for WNBC, Channel 4.”

“That a girl,” he murmured as the screen faded from her to the anchor in the studio.

She looked amazing. A little more mature and stylish than she’d been in Chicago but also happy and confident. The slightly nervous energy she’d always portrayed on the screen in the Midwest seemed to have evaporated on the East Coast, and it was a good look on her.

“Was that her?” Andre asked lazily, his grin visible from the dim corner. “That’s your chick?”

“Yeah, that’s her,” he breathed.

Andre took a hit and passed a bud to him, and Josh inhaled twice sharply. It took a few minutes, but the marijuana did exactly what he wanted, which was to loosen him up and relax. He couldn’t believe they were in the same city again, and he wondered briefly if they were drawn to each other unintentionally or if there were cosmic forces at work to reunite them. How could he explain to anyone that two people who lived in Kentucky ended up halfway across the country together at college in California, reunited and lived together in the Midwest, and then landed in the same city on the East Coast?

Well, now he needed to get his shit together. The only problem was he had no idea how other than following his calling. He was an activist. That was part of him down to the marrow in his bones, and she was still a reporter. How was he ever going to reconcile that restless, never satisfied portion of him when Jenn was a part of the system? How could he fight “the man” when the woman he loved was part of it?

“I can see the wheels turning, Hutch. What’s going on in that big, beautiful brain of yours?”

Josh sighed and swiveled his head to face his friend. “I’ve never been good enough for her. I don’t know what to do except leave her alone, but I can’t stand being without her.”

“You know, you don’t have to give up everything for a cause, especially when it’s not your own.”

“They’re all my causes,” Josh protested. “Just because I’m not oppressed doesn’t mean I shouldn’t work for change.”

“Just because oppression exists doesn’t mean you should martyr yourself.”

Josh started to retort but snapped his jaw shut. The words hit hard and low in his stomach. His friend was right. Denying himself happiness wasn’t helping anyone else, and it certainly hadn’t made his or Jennifer’s lives any better. He’d broken both their hearts for far too long, and he had to figure out how to make it right.

“You’re right, man. I know you are, but I’m just not there yet,” Josh sighed. “I think, though, that I might need to move here once I am.”

“Always a spot here for you, Hutch.” After a few minutes of silence, Andre added, “There’s talk of an event here in a few months. Think you could stick around and facilitate planning? Might help you get your mind right, and then you can head back to California to see your brother and get the rest of your stuff.”

“Yeah, I can do that, I guess. What is it?”

“A concert. Somewhere upstate.”

“A concert?”

“Not just a concert. It’s a movement. Days of music, and all of us communing with nature.”

Josh rolled it around in his mind for a few minutes. It sounded like something to occupy his time while he got himself together. The next day he met with the planners of an event they affectionately referred to as Woodstock.

****

“Josh, I can’t tell you how much of a help you’ve been during this,” his boss said as they moved a stack of flyers into a crate. “I wasn’t sold when Andre asked me to take you on, but your creative ideas have been stellar.”

“Just trying to help out however I can,” he responded. “Glad to have something to do that might help the cause.”

“Every little thing helps. Now, you’re off for the week. Go enjoy some good music upstate. I’ll see you behind the scenes.”

Josh gave a two-fingered salute and made his way back to Andre’s apartment. They were hitching a ride with some other friends and making their way north to the festival, and he still had to pack before they could leave. He was almost there when he decided to pop into the corner bodega and grab some food. Who knew what kind of opportunities there would be to eat with however many people showed up in Bethel? They’d had to change locations not long ago and they’d tried to plan for all eventualities, but that didn’t mean Josh couldn’t bring some extra sustenance.

“Always be prepared,” he said to himself with a laugh and turned the corner. He stopped dead in his tracks. Not a hundred feet away was a woman with long blonde wavy hair. “Jennifer?”

He chased after her, but he quickly realized it wasn’t her. The same thing happened at the festival several times. Woodstock was a gas, a writhing throng of bodies with music that transcended him and made him fly with happiness. For the first time in a while, he felt like he knew himself. He’d helped plan it. He’d thought ahead to bring food when so many others wasted time searching for dinner. He was surrounded by friends and people of like mind. The lack of restrooms and facilities to bathe didn’t bother him. That could all wait until he returned to the city, which came much too soon.

Back at Andre’s, he smoked weed while he took a long, soothing bath. He jacked off lazily and let his mind drift to a slew of different times he’d been with Jen. He fantasized and planned and finally came to the realization that he needed to head back to California to tie up loose ends and spend time with his brother. Connor would help him focus. Being back where he and Jennifer had first met and fallen in love seemed like a good idea.

��“Tomorrow,” he decided. “I’ll buy my ticket. California, here I come.”

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