#IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT DRAWING THEM FOR A LONG WHILE AND I FINALLY WAS FEELING LIKE IT LMAO

[turrondeluxe]

Lovers Rock

#IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT DRAWING THEM FOR A LONG WHILE AND I FINALLY WAS FEELING LIKE IT LMAO #i couldnt find an already existing ship name for them so im calling them #lovers rock #like the tv girl song #i dont care if its cheesy i dont care #gives 2003 mikey his spiderman romance because he deserves it #also fun fact #spiderpunk is one of my favorite spidermans ever but this is actually my first time ever drawing him! #hes so funky and fun to draw!!! #did yall notice that hes wearing orange converse #like a certain someone signature color #yeah #points at them fruity #doodles #I SWEAR MY BRAINROT OVER THE PEEPAW AU IS STILL STRONG #I JUST TRULY BEEN THINKING ABOUT DRAWING THESE TWO EVER SINCE LAST YEAR LMAO #my art #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 2k3 #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt 2003 mikey #tmnt 2003 michelangelo #spider punk #hobie brown

[semisolidmind]

So, in your college au, assuming catnap does end up murdering y/n, why? for what reason would the prototype ask for y/n's execution?, also how would dogday and the others feel? does dogday ever find out who murdered y/n or if he was even murdered? are they just reported missing? does catnap get away with it?, and if he doesn't and dogday ends up finding out, what's his reaction towards his brother's actions? Sorry if this was long I got questions and they need answers😭

ive been thinking about it, and i think that the prototype (which is a demonic entity in this au) wouldn't really have a good reason to command catnap kill y/n.

y/n is good to catnap. you'll see after i finally draw him, but cat is skinny. mans forgets to feed himself, and the red smoke drug throws his mindfulness and metabolism all outta wack. y/n, good friend that they are, reminds catnap to eat. they'll bring him food that they make. they let him "steal" food from their plate at lunch time. (dogday, being a good brother, does these things too, but it's kinda his job so it doesn't make as big of an impact).

the "angel" is keeping his executioner functioning when he can't, so the prototype shouldn't have a reason to want them dead. unless, perhaps, he thought that they were making the executioner soft. that's not the case (he does his job just fine regardless of any growing attachments), but if it were and catnap was slacking...

the prototype would take over. he'd have his acolytes send catnap a very high dosage of the red smoke drug, allowing the demon to take hold of him fully. catnap would black out.

the next morning, he startles awake in bed to the sound of his brother's cry of anguish. he goes into the kitchen to see dogday clutching his phone to one ear, hunched over and crying. the canid can't speak through his tears for a long while. catnap stands awkwardly, waiting for him to speak as the dread creeps up his spine.

catnap's heart stops with dogday's stuttered admission of what has him so upset; y/n is dead. the police found them this morning.

the feline says nothing, does nothing, but feels the sting in his eyes, tears on his face, and the impact of his brother's arms solidly embracing him.

why...why would the prototype do this? there was no reason to kill the angel, they hadn't done anything wrong, they weren't in the way, hadn't crossed him, there shouldn't have...

he doesn't understand.

when he goes to the bathroom later to freshen up, catnap notices the small flecks of blood under his claws. he feels like throwing up.

but he doesn't. he washes the blood away, and leaves the bathroom.

catnap remains as silent as he always has. he says nothing when he and dogday are inevitably questioned by the police (as two people who were close to y/n), the grief (and the prototype's voice) rendering him unable to even write out a response. they let him go, accepting his alibi. he was home all evening, of course.

he attends the funeral in a daze. he stands and watches the casket be lowered into the ground, far away from his body. he can still feel the fog of the prototype's influence hovering in the back of his mind.

for the first time in a long time, catnap's faith in his god is shaken.

———

dogday is never the same after y/n's death. the light in his eyes is gone. after the funeral, he isolates himself, only leaving to attend class and complete errands. he barely speaks to his friends, though they continue to visit him and offer their support.

eventually, each of the critters is murdered by catnap at the behest of the prototype. these murders are completed by a much colder and less caring catnap, who, after y/n's death, has no mercy left to spare (the prototype takes advantage of his vessels' grief to take further control of him).

dogday's reaction to each death becomes angrier and angrier.

he's wanted to find the killer ever since the string of murders started, but now he's searching with a single-minded purpose.

he gets better at wielding a pistol, better at wielding a hunting knife...he takes self defense and fighting classes. dogday slowly turns himself into a weapon.

dogday finally figures out where the cult is hiding. an abandoned mine system in a nature reserve a short drive away from town, converted into a "holy site" and the place where the cult sacrifices their victims. he drives out there to confront their executioner.

when he finds out that it's catnap, his own little brother...it's too late for sentimentality. his friends are gone. the love of his life is gone. countless others have lost their lives to this... this thing wearing his brother's skin.

at this point, the prototype has almost fully possessed catnap. the transference into the felines' body is almost complete, and during this time he is most vulnerable...but still incredibly powerful.

the fight between the dog and cat is climactic and bloody. a clash of claws, knives, and a struggle for dogday's gun. the forest floor beneath the struggle is spattered with blood, both men covered in open wounds.

it's a close battle, but catnap, despite being nearly fully under the prototype's influence, breaks the hold long enough to allow himself to be killed.

it's the least he can do, after all the trouble he's caused.

dogday pulls the trigger. a clean shot through the heart. killing catnap kills the prototype.

dogday glares down at the body that once housed his little brother. there is nothing of him in the battered corpse before him now... aside from the small, satisfied smile on his muzzle.

dogday finally allows himself to break down. he sobs over the many great losses he's suffered. but...but he has to get out of there. the cult members will be there any minute, and he can't be there when they do. he calls from a campsite phone booth to report catnap's body, and leaves it in the woods.

dogday does his best to recover.

months pass. with their god dead, activity from the cult peters out.

#this is a tragic turn for this story to take #this is why yn cant die first #i see this playing out like an old slasher movie since i am in that headspace recently #this stopped weird but i ran outta steam #sc college/slasher au

[dustykneed]

for context: star trek into darkness (specifically, my take on the implications of bones doing what he had to do and the emotional fallout of those missing scenes) (not that ive seen it!! but ive read enough fic to know the gist of it LMAO) (can you believe this started as an impulse draw to see if i could use pastels to convey heavy emotions and now im writing a very very long headcanon in my notes app.)

...

Leonard goes and he plays god, and injects Jim with that godforsaken blood, and then there is nothing left to do but wait.

He sinks into the chair at his desk, and steeples his fingers together. It occurs to him that these circumstances are the sort that would drive any religious man to bow his head and clasp his hands together, like so, and pray.

--but he is a doctor, and he has never been religious, and he has a duty to do, and he has broken his oath, and there is blood on his hands and flecking his shirt.

Leonard sits very still at his desk and weeps, and he does not pray.

...

sorry to all of y'all who had to find out i was an angst goblin this way <///3 but basically the hc/rough fic is an extension of the angst potential of that one scene where jim wakes up and fixates on spock (and his lack of response towards bones is never addressed afterwards i think? not sure but it's an interesting premise imo)

brief summary: bones never gets closure from jim after he wakes up because jim and spock get together immediately after and it just slips their minds, so bones is stuck in "oh god jim's dying" mode and feels absolutely terrible, but the bridge crew helps a bit by being there for him to hang out with, but still bones does overwork while trying to work through the sense of wrongness of not being able to have his emotional needs met after the whole jim dying fiasco and feeling like his best friend has forgotten him. he admittedly makes good progress (by which i mean he's able to take really big overwhelming feelings and put them away well enough in his daily life to function relatively normally) but the crushing grief is always in the background. about a month or so after spirk gets together, spock accidentally brushes bones' arm and is absolutely slammed by a wave of unexpected exhaustion and emotional pain and is like ??????!!!????????? long story short he drags bones to jim and bones cries for the first time since jim "died" and it is immensely cathartic and then jim blurts out a confession because he has horrible timing and asks bones to join him and spock and obviously bones cries harder and spock is about to smack jim upside the head lmao (bones says its way too much to process and he needs time but hes not exactly opposed, and they all start spending more time together, and then eventually bones is like fuck it and asks for a kiss and they finally get together !!!!!!)

as a treat for reading all of my mildly insane word vomit y'all get a soft bittersweet aos mcspirk scribble<33

gotta love aos jim's majestic eyebrows and aos spock's general sort of >:[ expression!! really growin on me tbh

#star trek #star trek aos #star trek fanart #star trek into darkness #mcspirk #aos #leonard mccoy #bones mccoy #spock #s'chn t'gai spock #jim kirk #spirk #dust trek hcs #dust hcs #im going very steadily insane #also thank you guys so much for all the sweet tags and comments on my scribbles and hcs!! i appreciate all of them so very much and #i have a low social battery but just wanted to say i love yall sm!! and i will continue to go insane and make things for yall as thanks<333

[hazenllas]

Can't Get Enough II Hazel Callahan

Pairings: Hazel Callahan x reader

Warnings(?): kissing, tiny bit of angst, mentions of break up, fluff at the end

(Apologies for any spelling mistakes, english isn't my first language)

Summary: After 7 months without any contact with each other, you somehow end up at your ex's front door?

"So, your'e breaking up with me? Over long distance? Hazel, we can figure it out somehow. I promise you." You say with tears welling up in your eyes.

You are moving across the state because your mother found a new job and you have no other choice but to join her.

"Y/n, you know how i feel about long distance relationship! We will lose contact and find someone better! This is just the way it has to be, i'm sorry." Hazel states holding your small hands in her big ones while looking int your eyes searching for an answer.

"Whatever, Hazel. I really really can't do this right now. Have a great life i guess." You respond, not even looking at her so she doesn't see the tears streaming down your face. You turn away from her and walk away. Hazel made you lose control over everything since that day. You were a mess. but what would anyone expect? You were an 18 year old girl who just went through a break up with the girl you loved and valued most and put her before anything and anyone else.

It's been 7 months. 7 months since you moved, 7 months since you and Hazel broke up. 7 months of you and Hazel not speaking to one another once. It was torture. Fighting the urge to apologize from running away from the situation instead of properly ending things. Fighting the urge not to ask if shes found anyone new, because you certainly haven't. Trying to get through this breakup was hell for you and everything made you think of her. Hell, you found a drawing of a flower on the sidewalk pavement and you thought of Hazel.

You get a call from your mom that you will be moving back to your hometown to live with your cousin, PJ and her mom because your mom found a new boyfriend and will be going on multiple buisness trips and no one will be capable of watching you. Thankful that your hometown is only a few hours from here, you quickly gathered and packed your things to get ready to travel. As your mom is driving you towards your cousin's house, nervousness hits you as you remember about Hazel. since PJ is friends with her, you might have to face her.

You wave your mom goodbye, and she backs out of the narrow driveway. You knock on the door, as it swings open revealing a very excited PJ. "Hey Y/n! Welcome back!" PJ practically yells. She gives you a big hug and allows your to enter the house. Your aunt greets you as you greet her back, following PJ up the stairs, to her room. "So, I think we should invite the girls over, to come and see you again, and just have a little group hangout. Just like the old times!" PJ speaks, sitting on her bed." "PJ, ive only been gone for 7 months! it hasn't been that long." You respond laughing. PJ rolls her eyes and texts Josie, Isabel, Brittany, and of course, Hazel. "Listen, i know you might not want to see hazel after you know, but you need to talk to her a bit! She misses you a lot you know." PJ says, not looking up from her cellphone. you take those words deep into your thoughts. you can't talk to her! that is scary to even think about. You just shake it off and wait for your friends to arrive.

You are welcomed by a whole bunch of hellos and hug, each girl seeing you and running up to you. You can't lie, you missed them all while being away. "Wow Y/n, you didn't change much did you? Well, seems you just got sexier while away!" Brittany says, looking at you. Each girl is talk to you, well, except for one. Hazel. She kept her distance from you and the group and just stares at her white converse. It is like this the whole time the girls are over and it's driving you mad.

After pacing around an overthinking for the past, forever, you finally decide to go to Hazel's. You know its a bad idea but you can't take this anymore you need her, and well, to talk to her. After begging PJ to drive you over to Hazel's, because you don't have a car, she finally agrees. It is pouring outside so all the sound that is in the car is PJ cursing at the blurry windows ahead of her caused by the continuous raindrops. Finally getting to a stop, you are infront of Hazel's house. Or should i say, mansion. "Good luck champ." PJ sighs, patting your shoulder. "Thanks PJ. Ill text you when im ready to leave." You say, getting out of the car. You wave at PJ before turning towards Hazel's house. You take a deep breath before knocking on Hazel's door. It takes a bit, and you realize you a drenched from the rain. Hazel finally answers, looking down at you in shock. "Y/n? Shit, your soaked. Come in." Hazel gestures you to walk in. you whisper a quiet 'thank you' before walking inside. She quickly heads towards the closet with the towels, and handing you a purple one. "Uh so, what are you doing here?" Hazel asks looking you up and down. "I uh i wanted to talk, if that's okay with you Haze." Shit. 'Haze' a nickname you called her when you both were dating. "Yeah yeah sure come on lets sit on the couch." She answers, walking towards the couch. You both sit there, waiting for one to speak. "Hazel, im sorry, like really sorry. I didn't mean to just leave like that. We should have talked it out properly and and-" You rambled, being cut off by Hazel speaking. "Listen, it's okay. i promise, it was dumb of me to end the relationship when it was healthy and fine. Im in the wrong to Y/N." she answers, putting her hand on your knee. You look up at her already staring at you. you both stare at eachother before you break the silence. "Haze, I-.. I still love you, And its okay if you don't feel the same or youve found another-" You are yet again cut off by Hazel. But this time her lips are on yours. Kissing you softly. She hums as she feels you kissing back with just the same energy. The kis starts to get more quick, as you both kiss eachother with such need. her hands are on your waist as she pulls you up into her lap. You pull away for breath but Hazel stars kissing down your jaw, to your neck, leaving hot, wet kisses. You sigh in pleasure as you move your head to the side, allowing Hazel more space. You hands go into her hair, at one certain suck she makes that leaves a heavy purple mark. "I love you, i hope you know that" Hazel breaths. looking up at you. "I love you more Hazel." You say, as you lean in to kiss her once again.

#hazel callahan #bottoms movie #bottoms 2023 #hazel callahan imagine #hazel bottoms #bottoms hazel #hazel callahan smut #hazel callahan x reader #hazel callahan fluff #bottoms movie 2023 #hazel callahan x you

[wiltkingart]

Do you have any advice on how 2 not overwork a drawing? Over-detailing my art (to the detriment of the final result) is a big weakness of mine, and ive been working on it lately, but simplifying my art is way harder than I thought itd be. I keep getting stuck in a mentality that less detail = less effort, even though all my struggling should prove that isnt true lol. & I almost always like my simpler drawings better, even though that makes me feel kinda lazy…as long as it’s fun tho, right? [1/2]

I’m asking here bc one of the things I adore about your work is how confident and striking your paintings feel. I really admire the way colors and shape language interact in your art…I always want to keep looking to see what I can find hidden in the details, but they don’t take away from the main focus of the image. How do you manage to strike that balance? [2/2] (sorry for the long question lol)

honestly this is still something i struggle with at times! but some things that have helped me are:

- identifying which parts i tend to overwork the most. for me thats faces so i have made it a conscious habit to render faces last. that way i can match my level of face rendering to the rest of the piece.

- working on all parts of the painting at once. some artists are able to work on a painting from section to section. this is not me, regardless of detail level. jumping around all over the place keeps me from focusing too hard on one section above others. i even take this one step further by working on 2+ paintings simultaneously but there is something wrong with me for this one i'll admit.

- staying zoomed out for as long i can. this goes in hand with the previous point but when you're zoomed out its easier to lay down the biggest/primary color blocks without the temptation to detail. once the main color blocks are nicely balanced its easier to pick out a few points of interest to add spots of detail to, and restrain myself to them. (easier said than done! but i try!)

- getting comfortable with backtracking / deleting overworked sections and layers. this might seem scary but this has saved my ass more times than you might think. i always save a version of my drawings before i merge everything / start rending so i can always copy over earlier sections if needed.

- cold turkey removing details from the equation for a while. i did this more from necessity than choice, because i was struggling with my health a few years back and had zero energy to sink into art for long hours. but looking on the bright side it helped me realize what details are/aren't necessary and how to build my features from big -> small. this progression of my patho art shows pretty well how i introduced details back into my work over time.

but yeah! sometimes i do still find myself creeping a little too close to overwork territory for comfort, even with all these safeguards in place. in that case i have to accept that not every piece i put out will be my 'best' and that perfection has no place in art. that's not the point of it!

simplifying forms isn't easy, the same way abstract art isn't lazy. but with all things it can be learned with enough practice. and if you decide at the end of it all that you still like drawing a lot details, it might be a matter of readjusting how / where you implement them. best of luck <3

#long post #ask wilt

[pettydollie]

♡.˚ ୨୧ ｡˚ ♡.˚ wild - m.s

summary: you leave your boyfriend to go on a hiking trip. you- on a hiking trip. this leads to matt thinking you're gonna leave him.

warnings/notes: lowercase intended, matt's pov (i suck at first person so i apologize), guys this is literally the scene from "gilmore girls: a year in the life", NOT PROOF READ, cursing wc: 1.6k

*this story is told from matt's pov :)*

5 years. thats how long ive been with my girl, yn, and i wouldnt have it any other way. life is great, fabulous even! im incredibly happy. i thought she was too- that was until sunday afternoon.

i sit in the kitchen, signing cards for our 6 million merch. i let out a small smile just thinking about the milestone. yn walks in wearing her puffer coat. she plops a large backpack next to her on the floor. i look up from the table. things have been weird these last few days, to say the least. she was becoming.. distant? it's just weird because "distant" is never a word i'd use to describe our relationship. but we have never ever felt so apart.

"hey." i take off my headphones, looking up and down at her attire and the bag by her side. she takes in a deep breath. "im going away." she states bluntly. she bites her lip gently, clearly waiting for my response.

i stare directly at her while her eyes wander off in the distance. blinking before dryly chuckling, i respond,“whaddya mean? you’re leaving?” i drop my sharpie onto the table, turning my body to give her my full attention.

"i'll be gone a while. probably like a couple of weeks." she stands nervously, twiddling with her fingers like a child being scolded though matt feels as if he's the kid. a look of concern draws itself over my face. "baby, what is this? what's going on?" she doesn't answer for a moment. instead she takes in a breath.

“i’m gonna do Wild.” she states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. i almost want to laugh. this has got to be a joke. “w- huh?” i sputter, rubbing my temples. she repeats, "Wild." i pause, thinking. then it hits me, "ohh you mean the movie?"

"the book. the movie took liberties, the book is pure, so.. book." she nods, finally deciding to drop her hands at her side. i guess my face still has that weird confused look because she emphasizes, "i'm going to the place. the pacific crest trail. and i'm going to walk it." i snort, even though i tried not to. "you mean hike?" i correct and she simply rolls her eyes. "are you serious? that trail's 2,000 miles long!" i stand up while using my hands to speak.

she grins, "i'm not doing the whole thing, silly."

i began to list all the factors of nature, her muttering an “i know” after every one. “bu- it's a trail“ “i know” “it's outdoors.. in nature.” “i know” “there's dirt, bugs, animals!” “mosquitoes, rivers” "i know" "you have to carry your own backpack! by yourself." "i know"

it pauses while i think of even more things she won't like. but then i remember, "you haveta sleep on the ground. the dirty ground, sweetheart." "i know." "you cook your own food" "i know" "you boil your own water" "i know" "you get your water from a stream" "i know" "that's in nature!"

"i know, matt. i know what's out there." she sadly smiles, beginning to fidget with her fingers again. "wow.. so. you're still gonna go? you're not joking?" my voice cracks. she shakes her head. i sigh and sit back down to bounce my leg under the table. "why?"

tears well up in her eyes. she's holding them from falling, standing her ground. "because.. i need to. it's now or never." she whispers, concluding the conversation before grabbing her backpack and walking out, leaving me alone and bewildered.

"god, who cares?!" i snap at my younger triplet, chris. it's been a week without my yn and i'm dyin. i dunno what's going on and i'm sick of it- sick of everything. chris sits down next to me, snatching my phone that was previously in my hands and throwing it on the couch. i groan, dropping my head onto the table. "jesus, man, what's going on?" he nudges my shoulder.

"it's yn. she's doin' wild."

"the movie or the book?" chris answers and i scoff. "what?? they're two different experiences." he tries to reason, but i just give it up. "the book. yknow, i jus-- i can't understand why. she's doing wild. she just left and bought some hiking boots."

"cute hiking boots?" chris chuckles. that cracks a smile out of me. "nah, real hiking boots. that you can hike in. and she did this after, uh... well. it's uh been.. weird. i mean, my girl, y/n l/n decides to hike the pacific crest trail to figure some things out, what the fuck?"

it's quiet for seconds. chris' mouth forms a straight line. but i already know what he's thinking. after a defeated sigh, he mutters, "it sounds like she's leaving you."

two days after my conversation with chris, i stand in the kitchen feeding yn's puppy. i stroke his fluffy head with a sad frown on my face until i hear the door open. i stand up immediately with my eyes widened. there she is. yn walks in carrying her heavy backpack on one shoulder. "what're you doing here?" i ask, surprised. i take a step towards her but she lifts her free hand up in defense. "don't come near me!"

with my eyes still wide, i let out a "why?" and she walks further into the kitchen. "because.. i smell. every part of me smells. i didn't even hike! and i stink. i showered, even. and i came back home," she explains while dropping her backpack into one of the chairs. "i haven't even been near a cactus for hours and apparently all you have to do is simply think about hiking and boom, you smell."

i cut in, "you didn't hike?"

she shakes her head, not even looking disappointed. "nope, they wouldn't let me. i tried. i forgot things and.. whatever. i didn't hike. but the thing isss.!! i didn't go to hike. well, i did, but i just needed to figure something out. and i figured it out! which is great because-" she rambles and my eyes drift to the floor, knowing what's to come. i try to brace myself but i can't. i can't let her go.

she's still going on.. babbling about coffee and hills, but i couldn't take it anymore. "stop!" i yell out, holding both of my hands up. now it's her turn to be surprised as her eyes go big. "i know what you're doing, yn."

"you do?" she asks, sounding happy for some fucking reason.

"you're going to leave me! and i just have to tell you, it's a big mistake." i put it out there and her face drops. she shakes her head from side to side, her mouth opening. "wait- matt-" i interrupt her. "i've seen the signs, i've seen them coming for months. your bolting signs- yknow the distance and then suddenly you're doing Wild?? like seriously? hiking alone with nothing else to do? no music festival or hello kitty booth, just you and nature."

"i don't care what anybody says, space is never a good thing. there, i said it." i point my finger at her accusingly. she tries to butt in again, muttering, "matthew hold on-"

"no! we have been through too much together, you and i, okay? listen, i know things aren't perfect, i'm not perfect, and there's been some issues. i am not unhappy. i am not unsatisfied. you think i'm unhappy and unsatisfied, and i can't convince you that i'm not! i mean.. this.. right here-" i motion towards me and her, who is standing absolutely frozen. "-is all i will ever need. shit, i never even thought it would happen! and i thank my fucking lucky ass stars every day. i know i'm not the easiest guy in the world to build a life with and.. and share a house with, but there is no one who will be more here for you than me!

"i will never leave! i will never think about leaving. i will do whatever it takes to fix what's wrong. i'll- fuck- i'll go to a therapist or some shit, i'll quit youtube if that's what you want! i'll give you back the entire closet, i don't need it! i only took that half because you insisted i do.. i don't need it, take it."

she frowns. "i don't want it." "well it's yours, take it." "i don't need it!" "yes you do! you need it! you need the space and I NEED YOU. damn it, yn! we have been through so much. but we made it here! you can't leave, sweets, please." i completely break, raising my voice and expressing my deepest feelings without even hesitating.

all i can hear the cars honking outside for a good ten seconds. yn has tears gushing down her pretty face with the most beautiful smile spread across her lips. "matt.. i think we should get married."

oh. i furrow my eyebrows. "but.. i-i thought-" i cut myself off, fucking shut up. i run out of the room to a closet by the front door. i pull out the engagement i ring i bought a year ago, quickly dusting off anything on the velvet box before walking back into the kitchen. she lets out a small gasp, wiping the hot tears from her eyes. i grab her hand, kissing it softly. then i get down on one knee.

tags <3

@stargirlsturniololover @junnniiieee07 @mattsneezing @freshloveee @freshsturns @emma4eva @r6diosturns @matthasmywholeheart @donthugmeimhot @blahbel668

#𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓽 𝓼𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓸𝓵𝓸 #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x fem reader

[harukapologist]

i never noticed your blog title. i am no.2 0109 siblings enjoyer. do you have headcanons for them too? (i am begging, respectfully)

OH MY GOD YIPPIE YIPPIE FINALLY SOMEONE ASKED ME FOR 0109 SIBLINGS HCS.... Ive been waiting for an ask like this for such a long time thank you... AND YAY FELLOW 0109 SIBLINGS ENJOYER worry not i have plenty!!! for both haruka & mikoto and haruka & john

-THEY BOTH LIKE ART!!!! haruka liking art & drawing is a hc of mine that i adore... and mikoto canonically likes art, but feels that he isnt good at it. at first he watches haruka draw and praises him and then one day haruka asks mikoto to draw him something, mikoto is like "oh im not that good of an artist actually..." but then picks up the pen and haruka is MESMERIZED by mikoto's art he's like. Oh my god. Please teach me. You're an amazing artist.... and Mikoto is really surprised because no one ever praised his art like this before. And he already sees Haruka as a great artist so he feels really encouraged to draw again. and they both spend a lot of time drawing together....

-mikoto likes sketching more & is great at it, but haruka likes painting more & is great at it, so sometimes mikoto will sketch something and haruka colors it, and the other way around if they wanna experiment. and they give each other tips (Haruka is very shy to give mikoto tips but mikoto is like " I'd love to hear your opinion on my art, i want to paint more like you!!! youre so good at it!!!" and haruka is just like :D !!!

-remember from the 0105 platonic hc post that, in my post milgram AU, shidou drives haruka home from school. If Haruka doesn't walk with the other 3 prisoners who are in school, Mikoto takes him on his bicycle and drives him to school in the morning before cycling to work!!! i like to imagine sometimes fuuta has morning lectures so he joins them (fuuta is tiny enough that there won't be a space problem i Think but they'll still be kinda squished on each other ahhaha) and the bicycle ride is disastrous because mikoto and fuuta are bickering while haruka is holding onto mikoto for dear life LMAO

-speaking of cycling since mikoto likes to cycle. he teaches haruka!!! haruka is always very scared if he'll fall but mikoto is patient with him, reassures him that the safety gear is there for a reason (Mikoto has no plans of letting haruka get hurt, he always makes sure haruka is wearing safety gear when he's a total beginner) and is encouraging haruka when he makes even the smallest progression!!! like haruka could cycle for 3 seconds and mikoto is like "LET'S GOOOO YOU DID IT IM SO PROUD OF YOU" and goes to high five haruka and hug him

-sometimes the evening or night time makes haruka feel down & scared or have a lot of intrusive thoughts or nightmares, it's been a thing since he was in the real world but its more frequent and harsh in milgram so he goes to mikoto's room with his plush and just lies down next to him while mikoto is doing whatever he's doing. often when haruka does this he will end up falling asleep next to mikoto in his bed and mikoto tucks him in and sleeps next to him and holds haruka if he wants to be held. mikoto really feels protective over haruka especially when he's resting, like anyone could be entering the room and mikotos like " be quiet... haruka is sleeping!" :'3

-speaking of harukas bunny plush, he really REALLY doesnt like anyone touching it without permission (the autistic urge to gatekeep the comfort item) and mikoto understands when he asks haruka if he can touch his plush and haruka just., *shakes head nervously* but soon haruka allows him to and mikoto is delighted that haruka trusts him enough to let him interact with his comfort item!!!!

-haruka really likes mikoto's hair and one day he's like "mikoto-san, I want to dye (well... bleach) my hair too someday" and mikoto gets really excited and they talk about what colors they could dye haruka's hair when they get out of milgram :D

-haruka always "heard" of john but he actually sees john for the first time after mikoto's guilty verdict in t2, and rightfully so hes very scared of him, but when he tries to approach mikoto on his birthday in 2022 (haruka was the first and only person to approach mikoto without bad intent ever since he got the guilty verdict and i cannot stop thinking abt that), he asks mikoto about what's been happening to try and understand and mikoto just. he tries his best to be strong but haruka can see that mikoto himself has no idea what's going on and is close to breaking down. haruka just hugs him gently, gently enough so mikoto can refuse the hug if he wants, but mikoto doesnt. haruka does his best to comfort mikoto from his guilty verdict, even though he doesnt really understand. all he knows is that his friend is a good person and he wants to comfort and understand him the best he can. and then at one point haruka approaches mikoto to try and talk to him and john is fronting!!!

-so this is like harukas first time actually interacting with john. hes like Oh no. i came to talk to my friend but now hes in the Scary state (he doesnt know yet what DID is) what do i do im scared. but he actually tries totalk to john. and john is surprised that haruka, although scared of him, actually tries to talk to him and understand him. john tries to calm himself to not scare haruka further and they have a long talk, mainly haruka trying to understand john. they get closer after this

-at one point john just asks. hey why are you still trying to approach me. I'm scaring everyone off and ruining your friend's life you should be scared of me. you should be viewing me like a monster. but haruka out of everyone understands what it feels like, being viewed as a monster for a mental condition. its why he's in milgram after all. and he realizes just how similar him and john are and hes like "..uh uuh. nobody should be viewed as evil for being mentally distressed right?" and him and john both start to see some positives in themselves, haruka because "hey if my friend is a good person even though he gets scary (when john fronts) maybe i can be a good person too." and john for a similar reason because "hey if this kid here has allegedly committed a murder too but can still be so nice (probably the only nice person to john) maybe i can still have a chance to Not ruin mikoto's life"

-ohmy gosh im so sorry I spoke too much righ t aaaa.... so sorry... but john feels protective of both mikoto and haruka after this. 0109 siblings are the realest ever and i have more abt haruka and john but ill stop here hehe I hope you like these!!!

#milgram #milgram headcanons #haruka sakurai #sakurai haruka #mikoto kayano #kayano mikoto #john kayano #orekoto #john milgram #how do tag john #milgram project #I HAVE BEEN HAVING THE BIGGEST 0109 SIBLINGS BRAINROT. theres so much 0109 siblings art in my ibispaint gallery waiting to be posted #soon enough.. #last final exam is in4 days (oh no) i will soon be free from this semeste.r.....!!!! and i will feed the 0109 siblings nation (we are 3 ppl #i want them to interact in t3 (there is basically zero chance of it happening i think but I WANT IT AAAAAAAAAAAAA)

[elkkiel]

Sorry friends, this is gonna be a long one. I feel like speaking in a space where someone may see and perceive what I'm saying is helpful to personal accountability. Please feel free to skip, it's more of a thought dump than anything (I am midway through writing now and I think I lost the plot a while ago lol)

Topics covered: grind culture, mental health, self-care, and learning when to manually sound the alarm for yourself as an audhd-er in the deep end of life.

Here's some tags that I left on the the grind culture reblog before this. I just wanted to share some thoughts and didn't want them to get lost; I feel like making a proper post really solidifies the situation (sorta like getting those abstract thoughts from your head onto paper, and realizing just how bad it is when it's all laid out before you.) And I want to make a change when I can finally get my head above water.

I think it can be especially difficult for us AuDHDers, since we don't necessarily have alarm bells installed that neurotypicals in similar situations may have but "choose" (consciously or not) to ignore. Things can really spiral into a bad place quickly if you don't have the cues or signs to alert you. We need to be diligent in doing those manual checks ourselves, KNOWING that we have struggles that make life just that much more difficult.

Take inventory of your life. Do you allocate time to self-care activities, and/or are those the right activities for you? Turns out for me that building a complex skin care routine (as suggested by mainstream self-care culture) only stresses me out more. Especially when I never have the energy to do it, making me feel bad when I only manage to do the basics *sometimes* (and the stress acne persists smh my head). My therapist recommended productive activities that involve both current hyperfixes and that ADHD Motor™. I want to learn basic carpentry over the summer, since I love working with my hands! For now, drawing masked men as cats will suffice (though I will not complain about the kittenification of my faves)

Choose a moment to consciously feel how your body is feeling. Check in with yourself! This is important for my alexithymia bitches. Are you more fatigued than usual? Are your muscles tense for some reason? Have you been hungry with no appetite? If you notice anything, let's make some connections—really dig into it. The instance I mentioned in the tags above was a really clear one for me. I took like 12 hours on the IV in the Ivy art instead of coursework, and that weekend I slept almost 22 hours. A few days later, I'm still in a cycle of horrible fatigue and excessive sleep. Connecting the trigger event (taking the time to create "unnecessary" art) to current sensations (extreme fatigue) is giving me insight into how stressed I actually am that I wouldn't have really seen otherwise.

I'm also feeling more and more aware of how activities and things become a bit of a crutch to avoid expending energy on social activities. Idk how many other people deal with this particular problem, but I have almost zero social drive. Like I legitimately don't feel the need to meet people and see friends. Almost 100% of my social needs are covered by talking to my parents, chatting with the girls at work (while at work) and passively absorbing interactions from complete strangers within earshot. It's one of the big things I'm continually documenting for when I can finally afford to get evaluated for autism (babygirl I don't even have enough for the ADHD assessment yet and that's more crucial for disability stuff lol) and it makes life real tough.

Not having the time nor the drive to invest in relationships really stunts you as a person in my experience. I don't know how to actually quantify what makes a friend (e.g. are we friends because we are Tumblr mutuals who haven't had an actual conversation but hype each other up in notes?) and I don't have any time to learn. I can't participate in leisure activities that may take some of the pressure off since I haven't been able to practice initiating interactions. It baffles me how some of the girls at work just casually meet up outside of work, or make plans out of the blue in a conversation (how tf do you gauge when/if to propose something????)

Like, it's bad. I haven't seen my best friend in a year and a half, and even the term "best friend" almost definitely isn't accurate in this scenario anymore. It's just another stressor that could potentially be avoided by lifting one's nose from the grindstone, but it's so intimidating to even try at this point. I don't feel the drive to be friends, but something tells me it's healthier than being alone with my work and thoughts.

Idk I think that's all I have for now. I definitely went on a tangent or two that don't connect back to the original idea so apologies for the letter-based vomit.

ty if you read any of this, if you have any thoughts or input I'm always open for replies or asks. The world is big and fast and horrible and confusing a lot of the time, but I think sharing experiences helps to keep things in perspective.

maybe I'll ask more targeted questions for community input some other time because I'm genuinely curious how to navigate around social deficits (the "who is a Friend and why?" thing especially because I genuinely have zero clue)

anyways have a good day, drink some water, take ur meds, and be kind to yourself

#my head is so foggy from fatigue i would be surprised if this is cobefent #its rant time babey im gonna go order some groceries now ✌️ #elkk.txt

[gingkos-eldritch-secret]

Fanfiction commentary and recommendations: Lex Luthor´s ascend from supervillainy to fatherhood Part V (chapters 21 to 25)

The Original story by @halfagone can be found here.

The previous parts of the commentaries can be found here:

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part VI

Part VII

We left off with the Joker free, Parental figures and vigilantes worrying and a legendary girl´s night. What could go wrong?

The answer is everything.

I´ll warn you now, because I´ll be discussing the things happening in the fic: be cautious about the gore and torture and visceral descriptions about violence here. I mean, it´s Danny Phantom and DC. So a little bit of this shouldn´t surprise any of us if we think about the subject matter. Especially because it´s the joker we´re talking about. But yeah. Even though I won´t be all to graphicgraphic, I´ll still be referencing these topics.

On another note: the social media part of this fanfiction is giving me life.

○○○••○○•••○○••○○○

Now we dive right into the first scene, where goodbyes are being made. Catwoman goes home after a night of card games and shenanigans and Danny sleeps on the couch squished between two hyenas and please could someone draw this scene? Because it sounds utterly adorable. Or has he slept earlier? I have no clue, my reading comprehension at 3 o´clock in the morning has never been the best.

Or well. Danny already has slept on the couch. Now he just wants to flee from a certain ex-villain who wants to put him into one of her old costumes.

Selina meets Bruce on the way home, who seemed to have had a long night of searching behind him. And still, as exhausted as he must look, she is still thristing after him. Power to you, i guess. I mean it´s the two furry adjacent people, so I´m not surprised xD

They also talk about the reason 'why' bruce is so tired and Selina finally grants him a small respite and just tells him where Danny was - and off the bat goes in the hope that he´ll find Danny before the Joker does. And that´s just the problem, isn´t it? Because when it is foreshadowed like this? It never happens as we hope it does. So, of course the Joker finds Danny first, but that comes later.

First Harley and Ivy´s place gets blown up, while Danny has been on his wa to Wayne manor. Does he go farther away from the explosion? Of course not. It´s Danny 'herocomplex' Luthor we´re talking about. So, of course, he runs towards his new friends´house.

And as hard as Tim tries to get there in time, Danny was faster and the Joker? He had already been waiting. They straight up drive into Danny with a van and pick him off the floor like a ragdoll before they zoom off. Not that it will do the Joker and his goons any good in the long run, but for now they´ve certainly succeeded in their quest for violence.

As the clown realizes that Danny is Luthor´s ward and not Batman's he gets the absolutely hilarious (not) idea of getting a camera. With the thought process 'what will Lexie do when the brat is being being broken and tortured on live camera'? God, he´s such an awful person.

Though I think that is quite degratory to the 'person' part of this sentence. I don´t know what I want to call the joker, but even monsters have more humanity than this. So then what is he? An abomination? A thing? A blight on humanity? Either way, he´ll get his comeuppance.

So the joker broadcasts a torturing session on live television. With Danny already roughed up from the … way he has been brought to unconciousness by the man and his goons.

Meanwhile good old Jim Gordon is feeling faint because. That´s Lex Luthor´s son. That´s a civillian. That´s a freaking CHILD being tortured. And he can´t even do anything to help.

The Joker gets some torture advice from the life stream viewers (and how much do you have to abhro a person to do something like this? How inhumane must you be? How much must you dehumanize the person being tortured to even get the bright idea to bring them even more pain?). And also just uses some of the nice comments for torture adivce. Someone compliments Danny´s eyes? Would be a shame if we took them now, wouldn´t it?

I think poor old Jim worries even more because Danny is so uncharacteristically silent. Not. That him being loud would be much better, what with the Joker being the Joker …

And Lex is just entering boss mode as he watches his son beng tortured on live television. I understand the man.

And the bats are just frantically searching for the warehouse used. One of these days they´re getting a heart attack from all of their regular adrenaline highs.

So while the Joker just gloats into the live stream and taunts the viewers he does not realize that Danny being Danny slipped through his bonds and took the knife stuck in his thigh out all the while slipping into the darkness to ambush the joker with a gun. He took out the camera instead and the chase? Was on.

It really is an action scene absolutely worth reading, but it ends with Danny getting a shot to the shoulder and Joker getting a shot to the chest. Of course that doesn´t stop our most hated abomination though. Oh No. He wants to take Danny with him.

And Danny? He has had enough. He just. Melts the Joker´s brain via eldritch form and that´s that for now. Until Jason bursts in and finds them and just gets Danny the hell out of dodge and into a hospital.

Though at first there´s Jason freaking out a bit at the situation because: how did that happen? I mean, I understand his priorities. Especially because Danny doesn´t look like he could pack a punch and the Joker seems to have died because of fright (though he also realizes that he died of blood loss) - with his hair turned white and his face a mask of horror. But the man who killed him is finally, finally gone. And while he ruminates Danny wakes up.

Jason realizes Danny knows it´s himself. He realizes that Danny somehow knows his idendity and while he wants to talk about THAT, he also sees just how horrible Danny´s condition is and wants to get Danny to agree to a hospital. Good idea, but the trauma is just. The trauma …. Poor Danny.

He´s still a snarky little shit though, because he instantly banters with Jason as he does first aid, horrified at the implications of Danny knowing how to get a bullet out of himself via FORK. Danny what the fuck???

So while Jason gets Danny to some transport vehicle, they talk. And Jason grapples with the inormation that a) Danny somehow seems to be able to see souls and b) has died before.

It´s kinda ruined by Danny telling him that 'I told you guys I had a heart failure. You realize that you technically die when your heart stops, right?`  Never change Danny, never change. Now, we know that that´s not the whole truth, but ... yeah I can see why he´d use that as a shield. It is technically the truth after all.

So while the GCPD forces Danny into the hospital, Danny …. Wants Jason to come with him. Jason can´t really say no when Danny trembles with fear, now, can he? At least one of them doesn´t have to be alone with their fears for now.

Lex is on a more or less literal warpath as he storms into the hospital asking after his son. And he begins to immediately rip into Gordon beause that is his son. With a hospital trauma. In a hospital. And while he still doesn´t like this, at least Red Hood is with him. Better him than Brucie boy in any way. (And wow, that were many 'hospitals' in a short paragraph ...)

Danny and Jason talk and I think Danny was this close to fist fighting the doctors when they wanted to give him an anaesthetic for the bullet removal. I like the attitude and I know he did it, because those things don´t work on his weird biology, but still. The part of me is just so immensely worried it´s not even funny anymore.

Jason is doing an introspection about Danny and his pain tolerance, the reactions to hospitals and the scars and i think he just wants to put him into bubble wrap and keep him somewhere safe. i feel u bro, i really do. But as you´re part of a story, I seriously doubt you can fo that. We can´t from our past. Even if we desperately want to. Doubly so in fiction. Especially in fiction. I mean. it´s a literary device :')

Lex arrives on the scene and instantly begins to fuss over his son. It´s honestly sweet, even when he threatens the nurses and doctors present to sign NDAs or ELSE.

I also think Jason realizes how important Lex is to Danny when he just instantly melts into his arms and begins to cry, even though he´d held strong before. Nary a tear or reaction. But people do react differently with people they feel safe with.

And he feels jealous. Because he could´ve had this with bruce, couldn´t he? If not for the pit or his reactions. Or is it his own fucked up personality keeping them apart? I don´t think that Jason really knows anymore.

So while Lex thanks Red Hood for being there, Jason reveals that he hadn´t done much. Which leads to attention on Danny who´s basically like 'So I kinda maybe killed the Joker? *jazz hands*'

Which is of course the moment Batman enters. Now that can only go badly. Not that many things in this fic have gone well . I have the feeling that i say this in every part at least once and i DON´T wanna repeat myself so often, but. Well. Ain´t it the truth anyways?

So. Lex may or may not have dwindled in his opinion on both Bruce Wayne and Batman. And really, who can blame him?

One could not keep his son safe in the first place and the other couldn´t save him when the Joker got him.

Of course he´s hating the situation. And of course he´s frustrated with the people here now. Especially as Dick wants to talk to Lex alone as Gordon and Batman interrogate Danny. And it is an interrogation. Or it will be. I think that´s happening in the next part. And oh boy... It will not be pretty. At all.

Dick and Lex --- well the conversation certainly could have gone better. And they certainly could have behaved better in the first place, but …. Lex respects the honesty and the reasons. Honestly, Dick´s a straight up miracle worker in this regard. Props to him! He deserves a cake for that masterpiece. Seriously >.>

Lex not happy about any of them. Not in any defintion of the word. But he accepts it. The family is still on very thin ice for now though.

And Lex ....he now knows what other think of him as a parent. How they fear for Danny. Because a former supervllain as an adoptive father all of a sudden? People do not believe that. He realizes what could have gone wrong now. And that´s just painful to think about. Who would want to think about being a bad parent? What if Danny hadn´t wormed into his cold, dead heart? I think I´d have felt sick if I realized how close I came to being the same as the neglectful parents and the abusive godfather ...

He also thinks of how easily Danny could have been just another Wayne child instead of his own. And while he now certainly hates Bruce less, I doubt that he´ll like him either for a long time.

#phandom #dpxdc #dp x dc #fanfic #commentary #in the youtube reaction style #if it works it works #fandom #fanfiction recommendations #drama baby drama #batfamily #batfam #danny fenton #danny phantom #danny is lex´ adopted son #people love him #lex slowly turning into a parent tm #is there such a thing as too many tags? #naaaaah #batfamily shenanigans #cuteness overload #Do apologize whacky grammar and/or spelling please #i´m tired #Lex Luthor´s ascend from supervillainy to fatherhood #Chapters 21 to 25 #llafstf #dp x dc crossover #Danny being a billionaire magnet #danny being a little shit #people are concerned

[bau-drabbles]

liaaa please don’t give me that promotion 💀 more hotch stuff bc ive been pining more for him lately and i keep thinking about that idea i told you about (where reader is jack’s teacher)? i’d think that aaron would try to bring jack to school personally, just to see you even if it was for few minutes? oh but can you imagine valentine’s day in jack’s school and the kids have to draw people in their lives they love/care a lot about and in his final drawing it’s you, aaron and jack next to a house on one side with his friends and his aunt on the other?

and when aaron comes to pick jack up, you hand him and jack this picture back and start complimenting jack on his skills but aaron is at the side wondering if this could work again?? :( he’s afraid of falling in love because he’s not sure if he’ll be able to protect them or be there for them when in need, but seeing his son so happy again just makes his heart melt. he likes being around you too, noticing that he has been putting his guard down when you’re talking to him.

once you’re done, you gently pat the top of jack’s head and he giggles as he walks away holding his dad’s hand, waving goodbye to you before a small slip up — he says “bye mom”. you can tell aaron freezes up, unsure how to feel but you’re immediately calling out to both of them saying that kids do this all the time and its no big deal.

you pass jack a little sweet, hoping it’ll ease the embarrassment he’s feeling. aaron turns to watch as you interact with his son, smiling and patiently reassuring him that it’s okay and that’s when he blurts out an invitation to have dinner with him?? this man would be so direct with no frills whatsoever, and while you’re taken aback by how abrupt it was, you can tell that he’s a little embarrassed by it too — his cheeks are tinted pink and he watches you nervously before you say yes. you quickly scribble down your number and pass it to him before leaving to tend to the other kids and their parents, now before sending a quick wink to the both of them.

aaron’s heart is beating like crazy because there’s no way he just managed to do that but as he walked towards his car, he cant help but smile at the thought that things are finally looking better for him, and that maybe, it doesn’t have to be just the two of the hotchner boys anymore <3

IM SO SORRY FOR ALWAYS SENDING LONG ASKS D:

- (not) gideon anon

aww baby, i don't think you gave me this idea the last ask you sent was sad horny hotch but teacher!reader !!!!! 👀👀👀👀 also never apologise for the long ask!!! i love them!! 🤍🤍

this makes me so sad and happy because the first chance at love after such a devastating loss??? 🥺🥺 like after the whole haley thing, he's so scared to love again because what happens if history repeats itself and he falls too fast and too deep?? but you're such a burst of colour, so vibrant and just so beautiful he just wants a taste. a little glimpse of what if.

and when he looks back after reaching his car, he can see you smiling and laughing to the other parents with their kids and you just look so damn gorgeous. the wind blowing just the right amount, the sun dancing across your face, all of it feels like a romcom. it's such a cliché but he all he wants to do is scoop you up in his arms and whirl you around before planting a soft kiss to your lips which look so inviting.

he paces himself though, this time he's a little more reserved but it's only because its so new. you've said yes to his invite, surely that must mean something good.

and in the midst of it all, your eyes have catches his again just before he enters his car. the usual stoic face drops a little and you see a hint of a smile and something more. his cheeks are tinged with pink, his eyes a hurricane of emotions even if you're too far away to decipher which is the most dominant. jack calls out to him again and he awkwardly breaks out of the trance, looking at his son before shooting you a soft smile as he gets into his car after securing jack in his seat

this dinner would be perfect, he concludes in his head. seeing your beautiful face and seeing just how happy you make him and jack feel, it was going to be all okay.

i love this so bad 😩🤲 your 😺 may belong to gideon but your heart def belongs to hotchycakes <33 😙😙

#asks #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner

[imagine-lcorp]

No Light, No Light (One Shot)

A/N: Helloooooo agaaain, my lovely dears! It’s been a while, uh? Did ya miss me? I know i’ve missed you! I’m really sorry about the big unannounced hiatus, I just gotta say things happened and well, that’s life. Does that mean I’m back? Kinda, and let’s hope. Meanwhile, pls enjoy this little piece of work, inpired by my fave band F+TM and the song with the same title, go listen to it!! I hope you like it and as always, tell me what you think, come say hello, and update me on what’s been happening with y’all. Love you my dears!! Ive not forgotten about u!!  

Lena Luthor x R//Word Count: 1,634 -------------------------------------------------

There is a darkness inside of every person.

A darkness, so hidden and so deep, that once freed devastates everything in its path.

Darkness that turns gentle hands into steel claws and baby blue eyes into violent light, tinted in red.

You remember seeing it once before. A symbol of bravery and hope turning into the city's worst nightmare in the blink of an eye. All good deeds suddenly forgotten and replaced by immeasurable fear. Something you never imagined to ever live it in the flesh.

You wonder how long it has been nesting in her heart as she grabs you by the collar of your uniform and pins you against the wall, threatening to crush your ribs and squeeze your heart if she so desires. But you would be fooling yourself if you pretended not to know the answer.

That's when you think about her. Her green eyes, her playful smile, her soft touch. If these are to be your final moments, you may as well go with a hint of paradise in your mind, instead of the hell that rages behind those eyes.

"You really thought I wasn't going to notice you?" Kara holds your sniper gun with her other hand and smiles. "I could hear your heart beating since you arrived here."

Her hold on you gets a bit too tight for your liking and you hold onto her arm. Your mortal hands can't do anything against her grip and, while feeling your heartbeat hard against your ribcage, you silently course your tell-tale heart.

She moves her head closer to you, a predatory look in her eyes which glow red behind blue irises.

"You should have pulled the trigger when you had the chance." She closes her fingers around your gun, crushing it in half and tossing it to the floor.

She's right.

J'onn had tried to warn you and if Alex had known before she would have given the order too. Now there's no escape and you don't believe you have enough time for a miracle to happen.

"Yeah." You respond with a hoarse voice. "I should have."

By the expression in her face you know you should have regretted your words.

You shouldn't be playing. Daring her in a moment when the word friend has lost all meaning. Hell, you're not even sure if you were even friends to start with. Otherwise, you think, how could this be so easy for her? How could it had been so easy for her before?

The comms in your ear turn on without a warning and her voice it's the only thing that stops your mind from sinking into less grateful memories.

"(Y/N)?" Lena calls you, and you wish you could die with that sound echoing in your ears. Your name in her mouth, even with the evident concern, is the chorus of an angel.

It takes a second for that image to shatter as Kara hears it too and you can tell, by the smirk that her lips draw, she's going to enjoy what comes next. The alarms in your head go off, whatever she's planning, it's nothing good.

"Len-" You try to warn her but the pressure you felt a second ago crushing your chest is now threatening to squash your throat.

Kara's fingers are wrapped around your neck, pulling you up from below your jaw with enough force you have to stand on your toes. You have no other option but to strengthen your grip on her arm, that if you don't want to lose your head.

With her free hand, Kara reaches your ear and pulls your comms out to put them in her own ear.

"Hey, Lena."

On the other side Lena freezes, not expecting her to answer. It takes a moment to imagine the smirk on Kara's face. That smile she used to love, now twisted and dangerous like shark teeth, ready to draw blood.

"Kara, stop. Don't hurt her." Lena pleads.

"Hurt her? No, of course not. We're just talking." Kara turns to look at you, the smile still on her face as she takes the comms and moves them closer to you for a moment. "Wanna talk to your girlfriend?"

You want to scream.

"Sorry." Kara responds after watching you struggle with her hand constricting around your neck. "Seems like she can't talk right now."

"Kara, please, this isn't you. You were poisoned with red kryp-"

"This isn't me?" Kara cuts in. "Maybe this is who I've always been."

Fear comes crawling up your throat as she takes a step back and looks at you.

"I'm one of the most powerful beings on this earth and I had to make herself small for you, so you would accept me, love me. I've spent my life pleasing you just so I could get the scraps. Well, I'm sick of it." You see the moment realization dawns on her. "Maybe I just needed a little push to help me see it."

Her eyes suddenly ignite with a new light, like a spark at the end of a dynamite stick. It leaves you breathless, even more than her hand around your neck.

"Maybe that's what we all need."

You feel some relief as your feet finally touch the ground, letting you rest for moment before she stars to drag you like a ragdoll across the roof.

"I want it all, Lena, not just the scraps."

You're sure Lena is still trying to convince her she isn't like this. That she must stop whatever she's about to do and to please, please, not hurt you in any way. You also know it's of no use as you reach the edge of the building.

Kara lets go of your neck, and you stumble backwards. She grabs you once again by the collar and another playful smile appears on her face, delighting on your fear as you hold onto her for dear life.

By pure instinct, you turn your head right and left, trying to catch a glimpse of what is happening around. From the corner of your eye, you can see the chaos that reigns below in the streets. Down there, you can hear the sirens of police cars and ambulances rushing to help the people of National City.

There are little fires everywhere and no one can seem to put them out.

You remember the fight that caused it all, J'onn and Alex doing their best to keep the Girl of Steel at bay. You saw it all as you looked through your scope, waiting for their signal. When J'onn couldn't move anymore and Alex became paralyzed, not wanting to fight her own sister, you knew you should have moved your finger. Kara's words come to your mind, you should have pulled the trigger when you had the chance.

Now, it is too late for any of you. There's nothing left but the void of the fall that surely awaits once Kara is done with you.

"Poor Lena, always having to rescue you. I always wondered if she ever got tired of that." She raises a brow at you, taking your comms off her ear and finally tossing them to the ground. She doesn't need to listen to Lena now. "Wouldn't it be better if she didn't have to worry about you anymore?"

"She wouldn't worry if you weren't out your mind." You dare, trying to keep your voice from trembling.

"Out of my mind? No, (Y/N), I've never been as lucid as I am right now. I want what's best for Lena. Obviously that isn't you."

"You think it's you?"

"I know I am." The smirk comes back to her lips. "Otherwise, why would she have been with me when she was still with you?"

Rage breaks into you as you realize the meaning of her words. Your hands, wrapped around her arm, hold tighter.

"Oh, she never told you?" She scoffs, feeling like she has already conquered the world. "Then let me tell you, I think you deserve the truth."

The anger is visible in your features as Kara pulls you towards her, keeping you away from the edge just long enough to spill her bane.

"Remember our little mission in the North Pole? When Lena and I got stuck in the Fortress and you were so far away with the team that you couldn't reach us? Well, as you know, I was having a bit of trouble with my powers and while we waited for you, we had to find other ways to keep us warm. If you know what I mean."

Against your will, you remember.

You remember it all.

"I know."

Some of your anger fades. This is a battle you won't let her win.

"I've always known."

Your answer takes her by surprise.

Time stops for a moment, giving you two a second to really look into each other. No more lies, no more pretenses.

"After that mission, it was obvious. Lena never talked about it more than necessary and you avoided the conversation entirely. You couldn't even look me in the eyes."

How different those eyes were from the ones that look at you now.

"It was all the same to me."

The rest of the world fades as you look at each other and your revelation comes out of your lips.

"'Cause, in the end, Lena still chose me."

She chose me instead of you, you want to say.

You think about her once more. Her eyes, her smile, her touch. Her love. Kara frowns as the darkness comes creeping once again behind those baby blue eyes.

"And now she can choose better."

The void behind your back grows claws ready to pull you down, and the light fades as you feel that final push on your chest.

#lena luthor #lena luthor imagine #lena luthor imagines #lena luthor x reader #lena luthor x you #lena x you #lena x reader #supergirl imagine #kara danvers #red kryptonite #red k #one shot #no light no light

[zedif-y]

birthday headcanon :]

impulse and bdubs are still bound to each other. in fact, they have been since the beginning. since that fateful moment in third life, where bdubs betrayed him for a clock.

theyre not bound in a traditional soulmate way, not usually. the narrative itself has stuck them together and they cannot be pulled apart. theres this pull, this instinctive draw that keeps them as each others doom and livelihood at the same time. back and forth. the wither impulse built leading to bdubs death in last life. the soulmates in double life. etho, skizz, and tango swapping out bdubs one life game for impulse in a later one. bdubs final death and impulses hands in limited life.

and of course, the clock impulse hands over time and time again.

they physically cannot stay away from each other. narrative counterparts for as long as the games go on. they can feel the pull. they know when the other one dies.

- headc-anon

(side note, did tumblr eat my other asks? i think ive sent a couple that didnt get posted)

OH MY GOD!!! THIS IS VERY SWEET OF YOU, I APPRECIATE THE LITTLE BIRTHDAY GIFT<3

i'm going to be . thinking about this for a long while. soulmates in the sense that they will be each other's doom. soulmates in the sense that no matter how far they run nor how hard they fight it, they will tear each other apart, one way or another.

but in the same vein: the hand that breaks will also mend. the hand that kills you will also hold you gently. the lips that tear into your throat will kiss you oh so sweetly.

i miss impdubs so much </3

#ryan's screaming #also the other asks werent eaten! i have them . i just wanted to write something for them but ive been in a bit of a writing slump lately : #i didnt want to just react to them yk? but rest assured i see them and theyre very cool! #impulse tag #impulsesv #bdubs #bdouble0 #impdubs #trafficshipping #trafficshipblr #trafficship #mcyt #headc-anon

[actually-a-fish]

The Mitchells vs. The Machines

Hello! I like watching movies. Ideas get stuck in my head while watching them and i need them out of my brain. This is my 4/9/24 viewing of The Mitchells vs. The Machines. I like cartoons :)

This will have spoilers

Without further ado... my thoughts chronologicall

PROLONGED EYE CONTACT DODODODOD

The main VA is Abbie Jacobson (aka Princess Tiabeanie Mariabeanie de la Rochambeau Grunkwitz)

this family reminds me so much of mine minus depression and a commitment to a cult :)

girl its probably a good thing you weren't at the tech reveal. be nice to the siris, alexas and echos in your life...

i kinda wanna watch that robot movie with Will Smith and hot robots now

THEY ALL HAVE STIMS GUYS

running away from your crush and saying you hate them is so real

"what are these? robutts?"

HES TAKING NOTES

I like that the new genre of villian is a tech bro and AI

I dont like this bit about wifi, we are dependent on it yeah but people can adapt pretty well. Well some I guess.

why do dads always suggest eating the family pet?

i cannot express how autistic this family is. its constant, not demeaning or the butt of a joke. just a family being a family. I have flappy hands about it.

aww dads do love to teach their kids to drive stick shift

i do like Eric and Barbara

the robots are shooting the humans into space, that's their plan and honestly i've been saying we should shoot garbage into space for a while now so im glad somone is finally doing it

there are cute edits done by katie through the whole movie and they deserve a shout out

I knew touch screen fridges were a bad idea

NOT FURBYS WTF WHY THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE

"your whole lives i wanted to save you from disater and this is the moment ive been waiting for" - Rick (and also my father)

KATIE DRAWS ON HER HANDS TOO OMG THE DETAILS. THERE IS SO MUCH STIMMING AND IT MAKES ME HAPPY EVERY TIME

This is good family bonding, but no tears yet.

unfortunately i think the family bonding was to good. The dad left a sentimental object in katies bags and now im convinced hes gonna sacrifice himself to save the rest of the family.

now im crying. :) if you watched i bet you could guess which part.

oof crying again! a Twofer!

This movie may be healing my childhood trauma. I miss my parents. They were just doing their best

THE CALL BACKS. THE CULMANATION! ITS MAKING ME EMOTIONAL IM SORRY

thank you game grumps for introducing me to the song "Walk the Dinosaur" by Was (not was)

An accurate compilation of watching my coworkers and professors use computers

uh oh they got little brother, Linda is gonna rip out someone's heart

OH MY GOD I JUST THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA GET MAD

ERIC AND BARBARA SUPREMECY

damn i need to see my family so i can remember why i hate them bc this is to sweet for me

TEAM E AND B! TEAM E AND B!

How long of a break between the entire world being abducted by robots and everyone going back to work was? Do you think this was like their pandemic

"My name is Monchi, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair"

THEYRE BASED ON A REAL FAMILY (and the whole family has "im easily overstimulated" hair cuts, its so relatable)

It's cheesy. full of stuff you know is meant for kids and that corporate made them do. but I really liked it. I know the whole bit is that the family is weird. I don't really like that they used the word weird instead of autistic but i can kinda understand why they had to do it. i found myself relating the characters constantly. The way they run away when things get overwhelming, communicate through their interests, stim when they have big feelings (they all have their own, and most of them have a couple they do) and the way the situation their in affects them. It is not perfect representation but it did a good enough job for me.

If you read all the way through thank you! If you have any formatting tips please lmk!

Also I feel the silly need to add, this is all my opinion, and my opinion is not fact! It's okay if we don't agree and if you're nice, I would love to hear about it :)

#ihavedaddyissues #the mitchells vs the machines #autism #neurodivergent #special interest #dinosaur #spoilers #the mitchells vs the machines spoilers

[feedingonthegoore]

oh to be owned by Papa IV.......smut incoming

as always, find it on Ao3 under morbid_ways

It’s late. You should be sleeping. There’s a warm lump of a person against your back that’s snoring softly. He’s been home for 2 days and he’s been sleeping most of the time. Tour has a habit of knocking the shit out of him. But it’s been 2 days of rest, and you’re feeling a little…restless. You turn your head as far as your neck will allow and take in the sleeping man behind you. His face is soft and settled. He’s so handsome you find yourself staring a for a bit. And then you get an idea.

He’ll kill you later but right now? Well, right now you need a release. You need to be used. And that’s one of your newly crowned Papa’s favorite things to do with you. He looks so peaceful; he’s not expecting anything to happen. His breath is warm on your neck, sending shivers down your back, and as you shiver you make sure your ass grinds into his groin. Huh, apparently, you’re not the only one that needs this release. His cock is difficult to feel completely through his night pants, but you can tell he’s getting hard from whatever it is he’s dreaming.

You scoot backwards until you’re firmly pressed against him and give another grind to his erection. He grunts and you know he’s awake. Hands come up and grip your hips and stop you from the next round of grinding you were about to subject him to.

“Good morning to you too, my boy.” He all but bites into your ear. Firm hands keep you still as he starts grinding into you this time. You both draw out pants and moans. You are getting even more restless and he’s getting into what he’s doing but you don’t want it to be over before you get what you want.

“Papa, I need you to fuck me.” You whine to him.

He halts his movements and gives a snicker.

“Begging already? Such a needy little pet.”

He sits up so quickly you’re confused and then he’s kneeling over you.

“Strip.”

You mind him and take your clothes off. You’re wet. So wet. So ready. He keeps you pinned with his eyes while he drags his own pants down his legs and then throws them to the side. His cock is free and ready.

“You’re going to do this my way. I’m going to fuck you. I’m going to fill you, and you’re going to keep it inside until I say you can release it. That’s the only way to be a good boy tonight.”

He gets close to you, lingers by your ear for a moment, and finally tells you “The whole Clergy is going to know who you belong to after this.”

And then he’s gone from your ear and is kneeling back over you.

You’ve just about lost your mind with want. He’s sexy when he’s commanding you, owning you. This is exactly what you had in mind from the start.

He’s rubbing his cock through your wetness and against your clit and when he’s got you good and ready he enters you. As commanding as he can be, you know he’s still only thinking of you as he slowly lets you adjust to his cock being nestled inside you. After a moment, he’s pulling back and thrusting in again and you’re finally letting go of the tension that’s been building since he’s been back in your arms.

Through the rapid thrusts he leaves bite marks along your neck and shoulders, devouring every bit of you he can get to while he pumps away. He knows your angle, knows where to hit, and he has you turned into a begging mess before too long.

The man has stamina but you can tell he’s getting close with you. He’s got one hand at your dick, fingers circling it, the other hand holding your head by your hair so he can look into your eyes, and he’s pounding you into the mattress with all the strength he has.

“Papa, please, I need you to cum inside me. Please.”

He bites you on the neck again. He’s way too involved beyond words at this point. His pace gets even faster, thrusts getting harder and sloppy now.

Then, he speaks quickly. “You will keep your Papa’s cum inside until I say otherwise. Understood?”

You let out a whine and nod frantically as you wait to finally feel the hot liquid, him, inside you.

He stills himself as his orgasm takes over and he pumps his cum into you. As he keeps circling your dick with his fingers, you clamp around his cock and pull the rest of his seed out of him while your own orgasm takes you into momentary oblivion.

When you come back to Earth, there’s a very sweaty Papa laying on top of you, panting. You poke him in the side with a finger, and he raises up and gives you *that* smile.

“You are always so good for your Papa. But remember what I said, my boy…no releasing until I say so.”

You smile at him. That’s all you can do, really. Everything else is all jelly and floating on cloud 9. You absolutely love this feeling, being full, having him in you for so long. When will he let you release? You don’t really care at this moment…for now you’re content with being surrounded by Papa Emeritus IV, inside and out.

#the band ghost #papa emeritus iv #cardinal copia #ghost band #papa emeritus #myfic

[mindmeltonabun-blog]

My Demon: Theories and Analysis for Eps 9-10

Happy New Year, Readers!

I hope 2024 brings great things for everyone. I delayed posting a T&A post for Eps 9-10 partly due to holiday busyness and partly because I'm tired of plagiarists taking my theories and ideas and reposting them as their own. For those who have been my followers for a while now, you know this has been a constant issue for me. I don't think it's hard to give someone credit for original ideas that they've come up with.

I thought I wouldn't encounter this same issue with the MD fandom, but I was wrong. I saw a Twitter user taking multiple theories of mine and reposting them as their own. I don't rule out the possibility that people can have the same thoughts, but when you're specifically mentioning things only I had talked about and no one else did, it makes you look guilty as hell.

Hours after I posted my T&A for Eps 1-6, they decided to take multiple theories of mine and post them to their account. One example is how they took my idea that the cross necklace either once belonged to Do Hee or was given to Gu Won by Do Hee. Another example is how they took my idea that the cross tattoo on her wrist symbolized she was the source of it all. There are many more examples, but I don't want to spend all my time listing them all out. It's the same old spill, though; they're doing it for clout. In the future, I won't be posting my theories or analysis for eps until a day or two before the newest episodes come out. This ensures the cheaters won't be able to use my theories for their own personal gains. But enough about this piece of trash.

I want to forewarn everyone this post is very long like 17 pages so definitely take a break from it whenever. If you have any questions about anything I've written so far for MD, please feel free to use the "Ask Me Anything" button and I'll try to answer your questions ASAP! There are probably grammatical mistakes...it's hard to edit 17 pgs worth of shit haha. Finally, if you choose to use my stuff, give me credit, that's all I ask.

Time to put on our thinking caps to analyze and theorize!

Section 1: General Thoughts

Eps 9-10 were top-notch! I admire the writer's ability to incorporate twists inspired by literature, movies, kdramas, fairytales, art, math, etc. One major theme appears to be the profound impact our choices can have, leading to unintended consequences not only for ourselves but also for others. The show also delves into the coexistence of seemingly opposing elements, such as angels and devils or odd and even numbers.

The clock in the intro, featuring angels and devils, draws inspiration from MC Escher's "Circle IV: Heaven and Hell." Escher, influenced by mathematics, created art that explored the interlocking nature of opposites, mirroring the eternal connection between Do Hee and Gu Won.

Now, let's discuss the intricate math woven into this show. The complexity of the numerical elements has forever changed my perception of numbers. For instance, I once saw "snake eyes" as 1+1=2, but after MD, I now see it as 11. Similarly, 10 used to be just 10, but after MD, I see 01 is its mirror image, and 1+0=1.

MD provides a fresh perspective on Dostoevsky's "Crime and Punishment" and "Demons," exploring psychological complexities, moral and existential dilemmas, societal and political systems, faith, morality, isolation, alienation, guilt, internal struggles, and redemption. Much like these literary works, MD delves into the psychological toll of potential crimes and the impact of abuse on individuals. It's a concoction of various influences, reminiscent of Frankenstein, weaving elements from Romeo and Juliet, DAYS, TOTNT, Goblin, Lucifer, The Bodyguard, Greek Mythology, Christianity/Catholicism, Cinderella, and Beauty and the Beast.

The overarching message from MD seems to be that everyone harbors inner demons, and it's how we confront and handle these demons that defines us. Our choices can lead to positive, creative outcomes or negative, destructive consequences, shaping not only our self-perception but also how others perceive us—angelic guardians or malevolent demons.

Section 2: Gu Won's Past

2.1 Gu Won's Name: A Divine Revelation

As I revisited my previous ideas and rewatched episodes, Jang Mi's line, "I'd say the heavens or his ancestors did," really got me thinking. Recall that in my last post I theorized Gu Won might be related to Madam Ju. Well, after I saw Jang Mi's comment, I felt like I might be onto something.

I repeatedly wrote "Ju Yi Sun…Ju Yi Sun" and thought about ways my theory could be wrong (like, what if he's a Park? Kim? Choi? Cho? Jin?). That's when it all started clicking. Gu Won's current name had ties to Catholicism/Christianity, so his past name must've been the same. Out of all the last names mentioned in this, only one was associated with religion--Ju. You see, there's a wordplay in Gu Won's past name, Ju Yi Sun. In Korean, "Ju" means "Lord," but it can also mean "wine" and "week" (hint hint… the show's got themes of Catholicism/Christianity and time, haha). The second syllable of his name, "Sun", sounds like "son". When you piece it all together, you'll realize Gu Won's past name means "Lord's son" aka Jesus. I've now realized the clues proving he is a "Ju" have been there since the very start, but I just didn't connect the dots until now haha. Additional clues are available on my Twitter for those interested!

I doubt we'll witness Gu Won pulling off miracles like walking on water, but he has showcased some Jesus-like feats. Remember Ep 1, where he performed the fish miracle for Park Bok Gyu? That's similar to what Jesus did (miracle #6, to be exact), haha. Then in Ep 3, he healed the sick, echoing another one of Jesus's miracles. And in Ep 10, Jesus—I mean Gu Won—brought Do Hee back from the dead, a blend of miracles #11, 15, and 33. Who knows, maybe we'll get to see another Jesus-like miracle before this show wraps up? Perhaps calming a storm at sea or casting demons into a herd of pigs, haha.

Throughout the series, Gu Won has been frequently seen with wine, a symbol often linked to Jesus and representative of his blood. In Ep 9, Gu Won tells God he prefers wine because it's the tears of God. Interestingly, in the original myth, these tears were attributed to Jesus, not God. Jesus shed tears when witnessing Lucifer Morningstar's fall from Heaven. The writer's choice to attribute the tears to God may hint at their intention to portray Gu Won as a blend of Jesus and Lucifer Morningstar. It makes you wonder though if God shed tears after Gu Won died the first time around or when he started going "bad", doesn't it? Haha.

For those unfamiliar, Lucifer Morningstar earned the moniker of the Devil following his rebellion against God, leading to his descent from heaven into Hell. Before this rebellion, his name carried positive connotations such as light bringer, dawn bringer, and the morning star, associated with the planet Venus and the Goddess of Love. Examining Won's former name, Yi Sun, the word "Sun" stands out. Given the sun is a type of star, this connection holds significant meaning. Coupled with the dawn imagery in Ep 1 and Ep 10, the connection to Lucifer Morningstar becomes apparent. Gu Won's story started with him playing the roles of Jesus and Lucifer Morningstar. After his fall from Heaven, he transformed into the Devil. As Gu Won reunites with Do Hee, his journey comes full circle, bringing him back to his original identity as Yi Sun aka Jesus/Lucifer Morningstar.

If Gu Won is indeed a Ju, it would introduce some serious drama in the show. This means he'd be related to people responsible for the past deaths of Do Hee's parents and the current threats on her life. It's giving me Romeo and Juliet vibes haha. In Eps 11-12, I think Gu Won will discover he's a Ju. This discovery will affect him deeply, knowing he's related to those who've inflicted so much pain upon Do Hee both in the past and present. This revelation will weigh heavily on him, leading him to end his relationship with Do Hee due to overwhelming guilt.

Section 2.2 The Past...Flip It and Reverse It

Let's revisit the Joseon dynasty, a time when societal norms were so conservative and backward! My theory about Gu Won's past remains largely unchanged. I still believe the major obstacle to Gu Won and Do Hee's love story was the differences in their social classes and that Gu Won became a demon because of Do Hee. However, I'd like to add a few more details to this theory.

Before delving into the intricacies of Gu Won's past, it's essential to grasp a couple of key points. Firstly, the past is the reverse of the present. Secondly, within the show, the notion of "wealth" or "richness" takes on an unconventional meaning. While wealth is conventionally linked with material affluence --having substantial money (i.e dollar dollar bills)--here, being "wealthy" or "rich" can also mean having a soul, as souls are considered a form of currency. For example, in the present, Do Hee is rich in both the conventional and unconventional sense-- she has substantial monetary wealth and a soul. However, in the past, Do Hee was poor in the conventional sense (she was the Cinderella character in this context) but rich in the unconventional sense (i.e had a soul). Now, Gu Won in the present is rich in the conventional sense but poor in the unconventional sense (has no soul; he's the Cinderella type character in this sense). In contrast, in the past, Gu Won was rich both in terms of monetary wealth and spiritual wealth. I hope this wasn't too confusing for anyone!

Before Gu Won was a mean bankrupt vampire in the the present, he was a kind man who was well-loved by his servants in the past. Gu Won treated them with respect and as equals. This type of behavior would've been viewed by many of his social class as unusual and unconventional. In the hierarchical society of the time, where nobility often maintained a distinct separation from their servants, Gu Won's compassionate and egalitarian approach set him apart. His genuine care for those around him challenged societal norms, earning him both admiration and, inevitably, disapproval from those who clung to the traditional expectations of class distinction.

One such person who would've greatly disapproved of Gu Won's actions was his father. Judging from the flashbacks, it seemed Gu Won's father was a strict individual devoted to tradition, adherence to societal rules, and maintaining an image of wealth and power. In contrast, Gu Won disregarded these conventions, prioritizing modernity and challenging norms, a stark departure from his father's values. Therefore, Gu Won's father would've viewed Gu Won as a rebel and a devil similar to how Madam Ju viewed Seok Min. Unlike Seok Min, however, Gu Won was inherently a good person. Side note, I think it was funny that in the past, Gu Won was all about being modern, while in the present, he's all about tradition haha. How the times have changed!

Being a hedonistic individual, Gu Won would have been a frequent visitor to local kisaeng houses, and this is where I believe he initially encountered Do Hee and God. My bet is that God may have been employed as either the owner or a waitress here. As we know, God tends to hang around places with casino games, and kisaeng houses often had various gambling games.

In the past, Do Hee was the antithesis of her present self. Unlike the present Do Hee, who held no belief in God and perceived her life as modern warfare, the Do Hee of the past was deeply religious and traditional. Similar to Sonia in "Crime and Punishment", Do Hee worked as a kisaeng to support her family. Her family's financial status was probably in shambles due to her father's gambling problems and alcoholism. Despite his vices, I don't think Do Hee's father was abusive like Ga Yeong's father in the present. I think he was more like Sonia's father, where even though he was a gambler and drunkard, he never mistreated or abused Do Hee.

Much like Sonia, Do Hee was a devout Catholic. However, in contrast to Sonia, Do Hee couldn't openly practice her faith. This was because during the Joseon dynasty, the predominant religion was Confucianism. Those of the Confucius faith viewed the rise of Catholicism as a major threat to their current belief system. Therefore, many Catholics faced persecution during the Joseon dynasty.

Despite coming from two different worlds (rich vs poor), Gu Won and Do Hee connected because they were seen as oddballs and outcasts in their own social classes. Gu Won, a nobleman who treated his servants as equals found common ground with Do Hee, a religious prostitute. These two odd birds were equally matched in every respect (odd and even get it? 1+1=2), creating a connection that transcended societal norms--they were, essentially, each other's soulmates. Their only "crime" was being born in the wrong era. Their love wasn't destined to flourish during the Joseon Dynasty. Instead, it was meant to thrive in the more modern times, like the present. If only these two had a time machine to fast forward to the future. Oh right...they did have a time machine and it was called God haha.

In Ep 9, God said to Gu Won, "Some call me time". Gu Won and Do Hee had the favor of God and time on their side. While God couldn't fast-forward time in the conventional sense (i.e give them a time machine or snap her fingers to transport them to the future), she could fast-forward time in the sense that she could make one lover immortal, freezing them in time, while she reincarnated the other lover at the right time so they could meet.

Just as in the present, Gu Won and Do Hee in the past also had to deal with people who were trying to sabotage their relationship. Much like their present-day counterparts, Ga Yeong and Seok Hoon of the past were among those who sought to break up Gu Won and Do Hee for their own selfish gains. Just remember what Gu Won said in Ep 1, "Evil stems from human desires". It's the desires of these two that contributed to the tragic fates of Gu Won and Do Hee in the past.

In the past, Gu Won's father had likely chosen Ga Yeong as a bride for Gu Won instead of Do Hee. Unlike her life now, past Ga Yeong was from an affluent and influential family, making her an ideal match by Joseon's standards with her beauty, wealth, and power. What remained unchanged from the past to the present is that Ga Yeong still had a bad personality and was just as obsessed with Gu Won in the past as she was in the present.

As for Seok Hoon, being a Ju in the past, he likely still enjoyed wealth, but instead of being the humble and kind person we know him to be today (I still have my doubts btw), he was a greedy and power-hungry Ju.

If we go with my theory that Gu Won was a Ju, one might ask, what was the relationship between him and Seok Hoon in the past? I think they were brothers--Gu Won, the lazy older brother set to take over the Ju household, and Seok Hoon, the younger, ambitious brother. Seok Hoon was probably jealous of Gu Won because Gu Won seemingly had everything handed to him on a silver platter without much effort or desire (maybe they were like Cain and Abel?). Side note, I'm going to laugh if it turns out Seok Hoon killed Gu Won with a rock because that's what Cain did to Abel.

Another possibility is that Gu Won and Seok Hoon were brothers who found themselves in love with the same woman. Seok Hoon got butt hurt because Do Hee chose Gu Won over him so he decided to destroy them both. If he couldn't get love, he would seek power (hmmmm sounds similar to the present haha).

Gu Won and Do Hee were just trying to be in their own little love nest but societal norms and people's desires got in the way. Similar to the present, Ga Yeong and Seok Hoon teamed up to exploit the lovebirds' vulnerabilities. Ga Yeong coveted Gu Won's heart while Seok Hoon sought the position of heir to the Ju household. Gu Won's vulnerability was Do Hee, and Do Hee's Achilles' heel was her Catholic faith. Team Judas decided to use the lovebirds' secrets to fulfill their greatest desires. As we've seen in the show, revealing people's deepest secrets can be an effective means to achieve one's goals.

Seok Hoon found out Gu Won was in love with Do Hee and wanted to marry her which again was a no-no because noblemen couldn't marry those from lower social classes than them. And Ga Gyeong, she discovered Do Hee was a Catholic by paying someone off.

Seok Hoon and Ga Yeong probably informed Gu Won's father about Gu Won and Do Hee's secret relationship. Gu Won's father couldn't have Gu Won tarnished the family reputation by being involved with a Catholic kisaeng so he sought to eliminate Do Hee.

On the day they died, Gu Won and Do Hee were doing normal couple things like walking on the beach. However, their blissful day turned into a nightmare as they found themselves being chased by the men Gu Won's father had hired to kill Do Hee. They eventually ended up being cornered on a cliff. Subsequently, they fell into the ocean similar to the events of Ep 1. The only difference between the events of Ep 1 and the past was that Gu Won was a mortal man who didn't have the powers to save him and Do Hee.

After this death, Gu Won woke up in Hell. Why? Because he was rich and lazy. Remember what Do Hee said in Ep 1- the rich and those who don't believe in God go to Hell. You might wonder why being rich automatically lands you in Hell? It's because those who are rich usually acquire their monetary wealth through unethical and immoral means. In turn, their actions eat away at their soul until they have none. Therefore, those who don't have souls go to Hell. While Gu Won might not have been directly involved in shady dealings, he still lived off his family's wealth which may have been obtained through dishonest means. Additionally, Gu Won's slothful nature and lack of diligent work might have been another factor contributing to his descent into Hell. As for Gu Won's religious beliefs, I don't think he had one. However, maybe he did in the end because of Do Hee.

So, what about Do Hee then? Where did she end up? She probably found herself in Heaven because she was poor and believed in God. This created the same issue for the lovers in death as they had in life-- being in separate worlds. Just like in life, they weren't able to be together even in death. Do Hee ended up wishing she could be where Gu Won was, which in this case was Hell. Do Hee sacrifice her soul/Heaven for Hell.

Do Hee's sacrificial act probably deeply touched God and prompted her to offer the two lovers a once-in-a-lifetime job...become demons and earn your souls back. However, I think Gu Won wouldn't have wanted Do Hee to become a monster, so he negotiated with God that he would become a monster for the both of them. Meaning he would work as a demon to earn back both of their souls and spare Do Hee the life of working as a demon.

By doing so, Gu Won would be able to save them from Hell and live a happy life in a place between Heaven and Hell, which was Earth. However, it wouldn't be all rainbows and unicorns though. Without any soul money to bargain with, Gu Won had to give up the only bargaining chip he had--his human memories. With the last vestige of his humanity gone, God imbued him with powers so that he could work towards saving his and Do Hee's souls from Hell so that they could have a better and brighter tomorrow.

Alternatively, I can envision the events unfolding similarly to those in Episode 1 with minor differences. Gu Won regained consciousness in the waters, and instead of turning back to try and save Do Hee, he swam up and left her behind. Once ashore, he felt immense guilt about his actions and saw himself as a monster and a poison to the very woman he claimed to have loved. Like the previous theory, God appeared and offered him a deal that would allow him to redeem himself. Though I find this theory plausible, I believe the other one is more likely to occur.

Section 3: More On The Contract with God

Section 3.1 Soul Money

Now let's take a deeper dive into the specifics of Gu Won's once-in-a-lifetime job! I'll start this section off with an analogy. God is the owner of Jesus Corp. Bank where money is stored. When I say money, I'm not talking about dollar bills, I'm talking about souls or as I like to call it, "soul money".

Gu Won is working at Jesus Corp. Bank as a loan officer because he's spiritually bankrupt as in he has 0 Soul Wons (SW) in his soul bank account. As with any job, Gu Won gets paid except he doesn't get paid with earthly money, he earns soul money. To buy a soul, you have to have 1000 SW (1000 SW=1000 W). For every year that he works, he earns 10 SW or 10 won (I will go over how I came up with these calculations further down). This may seem like a lousy pay, but when it comes to reclaiming your soul, sacrifices must be made. It really is a small price to pay hahaha.

Anyways, if it costs 1000 won (1000 SW) for a soul, how many years does Gu Won have to work to earn 1000 won at a pay rate of 10 won per year? 100 years. You're probably thinking where are you getting these values from and how the math ain't mathing, but don't worry just keep reading!

Let's first start out with how I deduced a soul is worth 1000 won. I kept thinking about the bill God was holding which was 1000 won. 1000 is "cheon" which means Heaven in Korean. It dawned on me that souls have the same value as Heaven, meaning souls = 1000 won and Heaven = 1000 won. You have to have a soul to go to Heaven and those who end up in Hell have no soul.

After this, I started to investigate the clocks. I discovered the clocks in Gu Won's place and on the promotional posters were decimal clocks, commonly used by those in accounting for payroll and hourly billing. If you're curious about what these clocks are, just Google it. I'm not going to spend more time writing than I have to

Ok so now you're wondering how I came up with 10 won/year. Let's consider how Gu Won's 10th name would be Sip Won or 10 Won. Then consider how there are a total of 10 hours on the clocks in Gu Won's place which are representative of 10 years. Put those things together! Each "hour" on the clock is 1 year and each time the hour hand moves from 1 hour to the next, it's 10 won. Therefore, it's 10 won/year.

To help you understand this, I have created a figure below that includes the decimal clocks seen in Gu Won's place (orange), the promotional poster (green), and a 12-hour clock (red). It should be noted that both the orange clock and green clock have a total of 10 hours, it's just that they start at different numbers. The clocks (orange) seen in Gu Won's place are a countdown until the people go to Hell while Gu Won's clock (green) is a countdown until he gets his soul and Heaven.

Now, let's revisit the deal Gu Won offers people. The term is that you get 10 years of Heaven for selling your soul (keep in mind you don't get all of Heaven, you only get 10 years of Heaven). Mathematically calculate how much 10 years of Heaven is worth to see if it's really an equal exchange. Multiply the rate (10 won/year) by the number of years which is 10 years and you would get what? 100 won. That's how much 10 years of Heaven is worth...100 won. You might be thinking now that it wasn't an equal exchange at all, right? Depends on how you look at it! One way to look at it is that you just got cheated because you sold your soul valued at 1000 won for only 100 won of Heaven.

On the other hand, one could view it as a fair exchange because these people (except for the mother and daughter) were trying to cheat the system. Meaning they didn't want to work hard to acquire their Heaven, they would rather acquire it through dishonest means (i.e signing the contract). In the end, the cheater got cheated so it's fair haha!

The thing is every time one engaged in shady crap, it eats at your soul until you're spiritually bankrupt. In this context, you've already sold your soul to the devil. You didn't need to sign a contract with the Devil to go to Hell, you would've ended up there sooner or later because you had engaged in deceitful acts to acquire your greatest desires. One could then see Gu Won was doing the world a huge favor by signing contracts with these cheaters because he removed these bad eggs from the living world more quickly!

Some might wonder, can you be a rich person while living and not end up in Hell after? Yes, you can. How? By acquiring your wealth through honest means, following the rules, and engaging in acts of charity. In this way, you would not only be materialistically rich but spiritually rich as well.

The moral lesson in MD is to live a righteous life and work hard for the things you want in life. If you decide to engage in dishonest behavior (i.e cheating), just know you may not have to pay for it while you're living, but you'll eventually have to pay for it in the afterlife.

Section 3.2 Why Did Gu Won Have to Work for 200 Years?

Now let's consider what would happen if say were in Hell like Gu Won was, but wanted Heaven? What can you do if you are spiritually bankrupt? You got to WORK BITCHHHH to earn back your soul. Shit.... that's hard for a sloth who had never worked a day in their life...cough...cough Gu Won.

Why did Gu Won have to work for 200 years? It's because he not only had to buy back his soul but he also had to buy back Do Hee's soul too. Let's do some math....if a soul costs 1000 won and you make 10 won/year, how many years would you have to work? 100 years (10x=1000; x = 100). Again, because he had to get Do Hee's soul out of Hell, he had to work an extra 100 years.

I believe in the first 100 years on the job, Gu Won earned back Do Hee's soul which freed it from Hell. In turn, this allowed her to become reincarnated while Gu Won was still stuck working towards getting his soul back.

Now, you might be wondering if Gu Won obtained more deals, wouldn't he earn back his soul faster? Nope. It doesn't matter how many contracts he signed, he still got paid the same amount every year. What mattered was that he worked period. And this is why Gu Won didn't know how many contracts he had to sign to prevent spontaneous combustion haha. He didn't get that all he had to do was work. To earn back your soul, you have to be diligent, not take any shortcuts, and follow the rules. As a worker at Jesus Corp bank, if you're lazy for one second, you spontaneously combust haha. If you cheat and break rules, same thing haha.

One might think Gu Won would be able to get out of his job as a demon if he became human right? Not quite. I was wrong in my previous theory when I said after he became human, he would no longer face the threat of spontaneous combustion. He still faced the threat because he did not fulfill his end of the contract with God. Gu Won agreed to work as a demon for 200 years in exchange for his and Do Hee's souls. The keywords are "demon" and "200 years".

The moment he became fully human, it was like he breached his contract with God. Hence this was why he still faced the threat of spontaneous combustion even after he became a human. He was close to hitting 200 years exactly but you know some things got in the way haha. God was basically dangling a bone (i.e Do Hee) in front of Gu Won to motivate him to become a guardian demon faster. Oh and the last piece of his soul is in Do Hee!

So how much longer does Gu Won have to work for God? ~1.2 years. If you look at the clock at the beginning of Ep 9, you'll see the hour hand is pointing at ~8.80 which equates to ~1.2 years left haha. This is why later in the ep, the writer hints at this by having Gu Won say to Do Hee, "Otherwise, I might have to wait another year." So yeah, if you don't work, you die and if you break the contract, you die hahaha. I think Gu Won will continue to work for God even after his contract with her ends.

It was funny Gu Won was trying to blame God for everything. I was like boy you're the one that signed the damn contract haha. You made that decision and now you have to face the consequences of your actions haha. End of the day, God was just trying to help these two lovebirds out and to get Gu Won to grow the fuck up and know the true meaning of hard work haha. Oh, and she was also trying to get him to forgive himself for what happened in the past.

Something Punny

Let's take a quick break with something funny before we head into the next section! So what do you get when you cross a line? Read that really slowly and think about it for a minute.....YOU GET A CROSS HAHAHAHAHAHA. This writer though hahahahahaha. On a serious note, it's because Gu Won and Ga Yeong crossed the line that things have been going in a more positive direction.

Section 4: The Mechanics of The Tattoo Transfer

Before going into how everyone's choices influenced Gu Won and Do Hee's fate, let's first explore the mechanics of the tattoo transfer. I have to say, I'll never trust anything Park Bok Gyu says ever again haha. Because I believed in his little hypothesis, my theory was completely wrong haha.

The essential conditions for the tattoo transfer are as follows: 1) A full moon must be present, 2) Gu Won and Do Hee must face a life-and-death situation, 3) The person without the tattoo must genuinely desire to save the person with the tattoo, and 4) The person with the tattoo must be near death or on the brink of it. The location and timing of the ritual are inconsequential. As long as the specified conditions are met, the transfer can take place!

Section 5: Fate is a Web Woven By a Myriad of Choices

Section 5.1 Free Will Vs. Fate

Ok now let's talk about the great debate...Free Will vs Fate. Did anyone catch the writer's stance on this debate? It was conveyed in Ep 1 and Ep 10! The writer believes these two concepts can coexist with one another. This belief is known as "compatibilism"!

What is compatibilism? It's the belief that while external forces, such as God, upbringing, society, and environment, may play a role in shaping our fate, the ultimate responsibility for our decisions lies with us as individuals. All actions, whether deemed as good or evil, are fundamentally driven by the choices we make. These choices, in turn, are influenced by our internal desires, which can be shaped by external forces. In this perspective, we are active agents, empowered to play a significant role in shaping our own fates through the conscious decisions we make.

God can influence our choices, but the crux of the matter remains we are free to choose whether or not to align our choices with divine guidance. As my bf noted, "Those who don't obey God or adhere to their plans tend to find things don't work out for them. This underscores the idea that aligning our choices with divine guidance can lead to a more favorable fate.

In the show, Do Hee's decision to save Gu Won and vice versa, who had the cross tattoo, can be seen as a complex interplay between free will, determinism, and compatibilism. Her desire to save him reflects an exercise of personal agency, emphasizing the role of free will in her choice. Simultaneously, the symbolism of the cross introduces a deterministic element, suggesting an alignment with a divine plan. This dynamic highlights the compatibility between personal choice (free will) and external influences (determinism/fate), echoing the principles of compatibilism.

Simply put, God can present you with a plan, and you can choose to follow that plan or not. It's your decision. If you choose to follow the plan and things don't work out then don't go around blaming God because you're the one who made the decision, you're the one who's responsible. Nevertheless, the underlying belief is that adhering to God's plan can lead to favorable outcomes.

The ending scenes of Episode 10 exemplify the convergence of everyone choices influencing the fate of Gu Won and Do Hee. Let's start with the puppet master – God. If God hadn't conveyed to Gu Won that Do Hee needed to die to regain his power, what would have happened? Gu Won and Do Hee's plan would likely have failed, leading to Gu Won's demise. However, God disclosed this crucial piece of information to set in motion a chain of events that ultimately resulted in a positive outcome. I aslo see this as one of God's tests to determine if Gu Won was ready to have the training wheels taken off haha.

Gu Won had the option not to disclose to Park Bok Gyu what God had communicated, but he opted otherwise. As a result, Gu Won's actions led to Park Bok Gyu expressing his concerns about the necessity of Do Hee's death, which Ga Yeong overheard. This, in turn, led to Ga Yeong providing poison to Do Hee, a necessary step in fulfilling God's plan for Gu Won to regain his powers.

You see, God does know everything despite her saying otherwise (in this show, God does lie haha). She knows all the possible outcomes there are and intervenes strategically to ensure things align with her desires. Thank God, she's Team Dowon haha!

Section 5.2 Team Judas

I believe Ga Yeong's decision to disclose Gu Won's secret to Seok Min will have broader consequences than she anticipated. In the preview for Ep 11, we see Seok Hoon joining forces with Seok Min, with the motive behind Seok Hoon's decision left unrevealed. I can only speculate and say that Seok Hoon perceives joining forces with Seok Min as the lesser of two evils. Thanks to Ga Yeong, Seok Hoon views Gu Won as the embodiment of evil that needs to be exposed and crucified, and the only person with the necessary "power" for such an undertaking is Seok Min. My question is, is Seok Hoon ready to sell his soul to the Devil? In all honesty, Seok Hoon is just doing this because he wants Do Hee to be with him and not Gu Won.

I guess Seok Hoon and Seok Min will devise a plan to expose Gu Won as a demon/devil. I have no clue how exactly they're supposed to do that given when someone tries to film Gu Won doing magic, the camera cuts out. The only other way I could see them able to accomplish this goal is by hiring someone to stab Gu Won in public so people can see Gu Won can instantly heal. Or if they want to do it "The Bodyguard" style, they would hire someone to shoot Do Hee, and then Gu Won would jump in front to protect her which again would expose him as a supernatural being since he would instantly heal. In either case, People would then see Gu Won as a monster. They would try to hunt him down like the Beast from Beauty and the Beast and crucify him like Jesus. Then again this plan might fail because Gu Won being a human now might not be able to instantly heal anymore.

Another theory is that Seok Hoon is teaming up with Seok Min to take him down. Maybe Seok Hoon realized after the incident at the gas station that Seok Min was behind everything. Seok Hoon will go undercover to dig up evidence of Seok Min's crimes. This could be his redemption arc maybe. Again, I still have my doubts that Seok Hoon is actually a good guy, but I could definitely be wrong!

Section 5.3 Do Gyeong

I might be in the minority, but I genuinely hope Do Gyeong survived the car crash so that he can testify against his father. While I understand Do Gyeong crashed his car into the gas station because he saw death as the only way to escape his father's abuse, it was still wrong. I also think he did this as a way to get revenge on his father. By crashing his car into the gas station, the police would start investigating his father. In turn, this could lead them to discover Seok Min as the real culprit behind everything. Additionally, I think Do Gyeong was the one who stuck a knife into Kwang Chul's chest after he was burnt like a crispy duck. Do Gyeong probably did this for the same reason as I mentioned above...to lead cops and Gu Won to his father.

Section 6: Madam Ju, Murder of Do Hee's Parents, and Seok Min

I don't know if anyone has noticed, but Madam Ju wasn't in Eps 9-10. This was odd given that in previous eps, she would always make some sort of appearance. I posed a question in my previous posts asking if Madam Ju was a figment of Do Hee's imagination or a real spirit/ghost. I've concluded Madam Ju is not just a figment of Do Hee's imagination. I think she's a real spirit/ghost.

Going back to Ep 1, Do Hee wished on her 28th (8+2=10 haha) birthday that Madam Ju would be around for a very long time to continue stabbing her in the back. God granted Do Hee's wish. God probably allowed Madam Ju to come back and talk to Do Hee as a spirit to help her heal. However, I think God restricts what Madam Ju can tell Do Hee. I feel like we'll see Madam Ju again after Do Hee discovers her dark secret.

In regards to the deaths of Do Hee's parents, I don't think Madam Ju killed them. I think it may have been an accident, but Madam Ju still blamed herself for it. Maybe what happened was that Madam Ju committed a crime out of greed like cutting costs on the production of electronic products or sabotaging a product to get insurance money and Do Hee's father found out about it. Subsequently, he went to investigate it/fix it and that's when the explosion happened.

Interestingly in Ep 10, we saw Seok Min with a tape recorder on the day Do Hee arrived at the Ju household. Could it be that Seok Min recorded his mother confessing her dirty secret and guilt for the deaths of Do Hee's parents? This might explain why Seok Min said, "So it's you, mother's way out." Maybe Seok Min was planning on using the recording to later blackmail her so he could get the chairman position.

Another theory I have is that Do Hee's father had discovered what Madam Ju was trying to cover up and then Seok Min found out about it. Seok Min then took the initiative to cover up his mother's dirty secret by getting rid of the only person who knew about it by planting a bomb in their car. Seok Min probably did all of this because he thought it would "win" his mother's love and approval and that she wouldn't see him as a devil anymore. Additionally, he thought in his own twisted way that by doing this, he was protecting his mother. Maybe Seok Min's real desire was that he just wanted Madam Ju to love him.

When Seok Min discovered Madam Ju's Chief Financial Officer had uncovered her secret and contacted Do Hee about it, Seok Min once again, turned to murder to "protect" his mother. Instead of receiving gratitude for his actions, Madam Ju scolded him for them. This was the final straw that broke the camel's back. If Seok Min couldn't have love, he would seek power, even if it meant killing Madam Ju. This act is what essentially transformed him into the real devil demon.

I just had an interesting thought. Seok Min killed the very thing he loved to obtain power, mirroring what God implied Gu Won should do with Do Hee to regain his powers (anyone getting Thanos and Soul Stone vibes haha). Perhaps this is the real difference between Seok Min and Gu Won. Gu Won wasn't willing to sacrifice the one he loved for power. Instead, he was willing to sacrifice himself to save the one he loved, which transformed him into a guardian demon. Gu Won's prioritization of Do Hee's needs over his own enabled him to obtain real power.

Section 7: Guardian Demon

Do Hee was right when she said Gu Won would be reborn as a perfect demon hahaha.....guardian demon that is! He probably follow a path similar to Lucifer Morningstar from the show "Lucifer," transforming into a figure with a psychologist-like role, assisting others in finding redemption and embracing goodness haha.

Section 7. 1 God Placed People From All Walks of Life In Gu Won's Path to Help Him Become His Best Self

Every person God strategically placed in Gu Won's path served a unique purpose, guiding him toward personal growth and offering them a chance at salvation. Take, for instance, the Wild Dogs. God orchestrated their encounter to provide Gu Won with an opportunity to rehabilitate them, transforming them into a force for good rather than evil. Similarly, the girl and her mother were placed in Gu Won's path so that he could learn guilt and compassion. Additionally, they were placed in his path so he could use his guardian demon powers to heal the girl without damning her mother to Hell!

In the case of Ga Yeong and Seok Min, I think God placed them in Gu Won's path so he can learn to forgive those who basically killed him in the past. Forgiving those whose choices once led to one's death is a challenge, but it's a necessary step in Gu Won's journey toward becoming a guardian demon.

Simultaneously, God granted Ga Yeong and Seok Min a second chance at redemption for their past actions. Witnessing Gu Won and Do Hee's genuine love for each other might be the very thing that contributes to the healing of their dark hearts, leading them to realize that deceit and manipulation should not be employed to obtain love. Quite frankly, they both need to learn to let go and move on haha.

As for Park Bok Gyu, God strategically placed him in Gu Won's life to be a positive influence, reminding Gu Won of his humanity and encouraging him to embrace his role as a guardian demon. In return, God restored Park Bok Gyu's past memories, preventing him from inadvertently signing another contract and facing a second stint in Hell. It's a fair exchange, highlighting God's generous repayment for those who serve her purpose. Random thought, is Secretary Shin like a real angel or something? Because "shin" in Korean does mean "god" haha.

Last but certainly not least, Do Hee. God placed her in Gu Won's path to assist him in confronting his inner demons, particularly the guilt he harbors for failing to protect her in their past lives. Forgiving oneself is one of the most challenging feats, and Do Hee is poised to help Gu Won realize that the tragic events of the past were not his fault. This, perhaps, stands as one of the final steps before Gu Won can fully embrace his role as a guardian demon.

God also put Do Hee on Gu Won's path so he can help Do Hee in her journey of self-forgiveness. Do Hee carried the burden of guilt for the deaths of her parents and Madam Ju, and God intended for Gu Won to be a guiding light in helping her forgive herself. Moreover, God orchestrated their meeting to help Do Hee overcome her lingering fears, including her aversion to water (in Ep 9 she didn't want to get on the ferry haha). I think her fear of water stemmed from the traumatic events of their past lives, where she and Gu Won met their demise in the ocean.

Section 7.2 No More Following The Rules in The Demon Book

In my last post, I predicted Gu Won would break one of the rules in the demon book to protect Do Hee and that's exactly what happened in Ep 10! Can you guess which rule he broke? It was the rule that stated, "You can't bring back the dead". With the training wheels off, Gu Won could now bring back the dead and that's how Do Hee was alive again and fully healed. You're probably like wait why didn't Gu Won spontaneously combust? Because he became a guardian demon!

You see, the rules in the demon book only applied to devil demons, not guardian demons. What does this mean? It means Gu Won could now do all the things the rule book said devil demons couldn't do (review my previous post for the rules). According to Kwang Chul, humans were greater than the devil or God because they could be anything. Be it the devil, god, or something much greater. In Gu Won's case, he became something much greater. He became a mutant.... a mortal human with demon powers just like I previously said.

Here comes that quote again, "With great powers come great responsibilities." God couldn't make Gu Won a guardian demon right off the bat. He had to go through a bunch of trials and tribulations beforehand so he could learn to use those powers responsibly. I mean, can you imagine if God gave Gu Won those God-like powers with no rules back when he was a spoiled lazy rich boy during Joseon? The world would be destroyed as we know it!

However, it's not over yet people! Remember Gu Won still has 1.2 years left of work in his contract with God! If he doesn't finish up that contract, he can still spontaneously combust regardless if he's a guardian demon or not! Also, Gu Won can kill now which is scary! If I were Seok Min, I would be shaking in my boots right now. Madam Ju did say Seok Min would have to pay for his sins sooner or later!

In the end, Gu Won won't be a man who couldn't have his cake and eat it too. He'll become a man who can have his cake and eat it too! He just has to learn to be a good hard-working boy like Pinocchio haha. If you work hard and live a righteous life, God rewards you with all of your heart's desires (The atheist in me wants to vomit... sorry haha).

Section 8: Who Leaked Information About Gu Won and Do Hee's Whereabouts?

Everyone is thinking it's Secretary Shin who leaked the info about Gu Won and Do Hee's location. However, I think it was Do Gyeong. Seok Min probably had Kwang Chul place a tracker on Do Hee's car and when Do Gyeong hacked Seok Min's phone, he was able to obtain the tracking data. As for Team Judas, maybe Seok Hoon had placed a tracker in Do Hee's purse or put himself as a contact in her "Find My" app!

Section 9: Symbolism

Section 9.1 The Necklaces

In my first MD post, I highlighted the presence of both a silver and a gold necklace worn by Gu Won and Do Hee, and I've now unraveled the significance behind them: Gold symbolizes the Sun and Heaven, while Silver represents the Moon and Hell. Let's delve into Gu Won's necklaces first.

As mentioned previously, the silver cross necklace was speculated to either have belonged to Do Hee or been a gift from her to Gu Won. Notably, Gu Won's gold necklace doesn't feature a cross (unlike Do Hee's necklaces, which bear lover's knots). Why is this? Simply put, Gu Won didn't embrace faith in God and wasn't a Catholic. Gu Won wearing the silver necklace with the cross serves as a testament to Do Hee's steadfast faith, which played a pivotal role in saving them from eternal damnation in Hell. At the same time, when I think of silver, I think of Judas who betrayed Jesus for 30 silver coins, werewolves, and vampires haha.

The choice of material may also offer insights into Gu Won and Do Hee's past. Gold, being an expensive material, was a luxury afforded only by the wealthy, such as noblemen. In contrast, silver, being more affordable, aligns with the humbler status of individuals like kisaengs. Silver exudes humility akin to Do Hee, while gold mirrors the extravagant and ostentatious nature of Gu Won haha.

Now, turning to Do Hee's necklaces – they symbolize the enduring connection between her and Gu Won, transcending realms of Hell and Heaven forever and to infinity! Their love acts as a powerful force, enabling them to overcome any barriers to be reunited.

Section 9.2 Flowers

Section 9.2a Devil's Trumpets

Remember Devil's Trumpets from "The Glory" haha? Its scientific name is Datura stramonium, also known as devil's snare (any Harry Potter fans here? haha). This plant belongs to the nightshade family, a group where many members are poisonous (potatoes, eggplants, tomatoes, etc are part of this family, but they're not toxic). While Devil's Trumpets can be highly toxic, they can also possess medicinal properties and have been used to treat various illnesses. Occult practitioners sometimes consume this flower for visionary experiences.

In the story of Romeo and Juliet, the poison the star-crossed lovers consumed was from a member of the nightshade family called "Belladonna." Considering this, Ga Yeong's poison to Do Hee could have been either Devil's Trumpets or Belladonna. Additionally, the Devil's Trumpet might symbolize Gu Won, suggesting that despite the toxicity of his family (the Ju family), he is a benevolent person capable of healing rather than harming. He's an eggplant haha!

Section 9.2b Poppy

What do poppies symbolize? Death, dreams, and remembrance. It's fitting given in the Ep 11 preview, Gu Won will have a dream of his past life and remember shit. Who knows maybe we will finally get to see how he died? The poppy in his ear could also be a foreshadow that he will die again verrryyyy soon haha.

Section 9.3 Snakes

Christianity seems to have a knack for twisting once-positive symbols into something negative! Before snakes became synonymous with evil, the Devil, and Satan, they were revered as good spirits in Greek and Korean mythology

In Ancient Greece, snakes were often linked to Agathodaimon, a lesser deity meaning "good/noble spirit" (this is what Gu Won is; I bet the writer will mention this term haha). Agathodaemons were household gods and protectors of those who worshipped them. Representations of Agathodaimon featured snakes with a poppy flower (similar to Gu Won's in the EP 11 preview) and an ear of grain, symbolizing prosperity and fertility respectively. This deity was also portrayed as a man holding a cornucopia, akin to Thanksgiving traditions. Ancient Greeks would honor Agathodaimon with a few drops of wine after a meal.

In Greek myths, Agathodaimon was believed to be the spouse of Tyche (probably Do Hee), the goddess of fate and fortune (also known as Lady Fortuna or Lady Luck). In Egypt, Agathodaimon was associated with Osiris, the Lord of the Underworld, and Shai, the god of fate. Basically, you would want Agathodaimon because he would bring you good luck, wealth, and protection.

In Korean mythology, snakes were also viewed as creatures of good luck. For example, in Korean myths, the Imoogi was one big fat snake that brought good luck and fertility to crops. However, it was believed if you ever prevented an Imoogi from ascending to the Heavens, bad shit would happen like plagues, typhoons, infertile land, and famine. The overall message is don't kill snakes because bad shit will happen. I'm suddenly getting a bad feeling Gu Won is going to get killed and a natural disaster will occur haha. For those wanting to learn more about Imoogis, you can click on the link below or Google it.

So y'all are probably wondering why the hell i'm telling you all of this? It's because in Ep 10, Gu Won rolled what is known as "snake eyes". The reason this roll is called "snake eyes" is because the 1's resemble the two pips to the eyes of a snake. In craps, this roll can either mean you're really lucky or unlucky, representing an odd phenomenon. For example, when you roll snake eyes on the initial roll, you have to roll it again on the next roll to win the round. However, the probability of rolling "snake eyes" is very low (2.78%).

Another thing to mention is how 2 odd numbers can equal an even number where 1+1=2. You could also view Gu Won's roll as a good omen because it's 1...1....11 which is considered a lucky number! Our little lovers are snakes who are bringers of luck and fertility haha.

FYI, one of God's rolls was a "push" or "standoff" roll which are two 6's. Like snake eyes, this roll has the same low probability of 2.78%. The funny thing about Gu Won's roll and God's roll is that Gu Won's roll is the lowest value you can get which is 2 and God's roll is the highest value you can get which is 12.

Section 10: OTHER RANDOM THOUGHTS

I have none. I'm brain-dead from researching, thinking of stuff, and editing this monster of a post. K byeeee

#my demon #there are probably grammatical mistakes #song kang #kim yoojung #do dohee #jeong gu won #gu won #devil #ga Yeong #do hee #why did i write so much #my brain hurts now #kim you jung #long post #long reads #i hate plagiarists #daemon #seok hoon #the writer of this show is so religious hahaha

[i--antimony]

2023 year in review roundup

wow!! what a fucking year!!! goodbye and good riddance! happy first day of 2024!

this year i did 37 tuesdayposts! there were 53 tuesdays so that's about 70%! some of them were on fri/sat instead as shabbosposts but i think posting on tuesday or even monday does just work better for some fucking reason. maybe because friday and saturday are days that i am most likely to do New Activities for making/playing/watching/reading??? and so on monday or tuesday i can recap the just-finished weekend. shrug! we love tuesday so it's fine.

listening listened to all of twilight mirage and a little over half of partizan! shrieking shack podcast, just king things, well there's your problem, miscellaneous music (maneskin probably a notable winner in there)

reading a lot of little articles. a little tgcf. SO much fanfic. 'every heart a doorway' (bad). 'birthday of the world' le guin (good).

playing a little disco elysium. a little minecraft. a little nier automata. a little hadesgame. a LOT of pokemon go. and i got into magic the gathering this year!

watching a lot of youtube videos. so many gd youtube videos. evangelion, history of the world part ii, cunk on earth, vox machina animated series, cowboy bebop, first season of peaky blinders, the new tgcf donghua season!

making i did very little drawing/painting/illustration beyond life drawing a few times...however i was very prolific in crafting! i also theoretically made valentines gifts. i do not remember what they were tho lol.

fiber arts: i completed a big embroidery project (fermenting dregs album art hoodie), quantum shawl, mesh market bag, case for my knew laptop, finished that blue tank top even though i hate it, fixed the lining on my yellow knitted cowl, made a little knitted headphone top cover that i will probably redo differently, headband ear warmer for my roommate's mom, and FINALLY i just barely finished the scarf for my SO before the end of 2023!

print block carving: wristwatch print, gavelbocken holiday card print

misc/writing: some songxuexiao fencing au. some harrowhark abhorsen au. neocities website!

and so much pottery! this is all of it, barring the things i already gave away as presents before this photo (two pots and a little box and the little raven guy), but wow! that's so many fuckin object!

misc what a fucking year. some bad! had to file a big car insurance claim! got really sick while abroad and that persisted for a long fucking time! mini summer breakdown! some good stuff too - passed quantum mechanics FOREVER good fucking bye, did my first successful academic conference, finally started feeling better around the end of the year! learned my lesson: it's not fuckin worth stressing yourself to death over, and also i can't just Be At Home Aimlessly for months any more. it's bad for my mental health.

reviewing 2023 resolutions and goals --> I’d love to start writing again and play more horn but we’ll see i basically didn't do any creative writing at all this year barring a few lines of fanfic ideas (the abhorsen/tlt crossover one) HOWEVER i READ a lot of fanfic to marinate in and i played a LOT more french horn!! i joined the little youth orchestra which is like, uber goofy, but it means ive been playing on a regular basis again!

--> I also wanna listen to more weird music, and invest in actually owning some files, especially for some of the lesser-known bands and through bandcamp and stuff i spent all year meaning to do this and kept pushing it off so it rolls over into next year.

--> I really want to kind of dial those [unhealthy coping mechanisms] back again, focus more on existing in Reality and more in each moment, which hopefully will also help with some of the skin picking and other anxious habits that resurfaced. maybe more yoga, maybe re-establishing a meditation process lol lmao. nah. but definitely rolling it over into 2024.

--> I would love to think more about my fashion and how I present myself too, and work on making and tailoring more of my clothing in general actually not bad! basically zero tailoring but i did a pretty good job wearing some cute outfits.

--> I’ve been pretty good about being active so I’d like to keep that up, I still can’t do a pull-up but maybe this is the year! (lol) I should also start doing some minor exercises for my shitty arthritis toes to keep those okay once again: lol lmao. health issues had me really regress in some of my gains goals. plus side is toes are doin pretty normal.

--> a lot of last year was kind of a wash regarding research so I’m really looking forward to refocusing on that and really getting things moving. oh it moved! in a good way! i'm making good progress and hopefully i will keep that momentum going!

--> finally! I want to get back to tabletop! I miss doing it so much! it fell by the wayside for me because of how busy and overwhelmed I was, especially this past fall semester, but I want to start running and playing games with my pals again a little! i should have been putting these in playing as i went oops. the tabletop group i've run was a little fallow this year due to at least half of our group, including myself, not being in Tabletop Mood but we've played a lot of res arcana and other such games instead.

i had a few other resolutions in my digital planner on my ipad that didn't go in the writeup last year: namely, practice languages more (i did practice my mandarin a little but did not really learn any hebrew or korean unfortunately) and establish a non-software component of my research (nope, not in the cards, but i'm hoping to do something else this summer to let me get better with physical data/setups), and finishing the masters degree requirements (that will be the end of this upcoming spring semester), but overall i really did hit most of my resolutions and goals! even with being ill for a while! (except the finances. i am simply not looking at them <3)

2024 resolutions and goals

definitely some rollover! i will format this to hopefully be a little easier to respond to next year:

- get back on a regular workout schedule: swimming 1x a week, weights once or twice a week. would like to try and work towards my One Pullup goal again. would also be cool to try and work towards a hand/headstand. - try and be more mindful. i'm going to continue the grief therapy but also think about meditating more, doing more yoga, and so on. - there's a gallery on main street that solicits work from local artists for bimonthy themed exhibitions and i really want to submit at least one thing to it this year! the one due by end of january is themed 'florals', and the one two months after that is 'layers', so i'd really like to submit something to one of those. - more weird art! use that big canvas i bought in literally 2022! paint!!! - finally put together that travel journal from korea & japan (and also scrapbook-ify the papers i have leftover in a pile from that) - also, maybe do current scrapbook a little different? might need a new binder at the very least. - hang up that expensive quilt i bought in august - speaking of quilt: do some hand quilting, english paper piercing! i have so much fucking fabric! - find a new apartment to move into that hopefully won't suck! - try to secure some sort of summer internship or project that will let me develop some new skillsets that i might not be getting with my current research - finish the masters degree - write...a paper? for the work i just presented??? - keep tweaking neocities and make some more pages - keep track of recipes this year as well in my making section

i might start a little spreadsheet this year to keep better track of all my stuff because i really did Not want to go through all my separate listening and reading sections and extract what i liked the most, etc. this post required me to first back up a few extra early tuesdayposts from this year to dreamwidth, and then skim all of them to accumulate the above, and that was kinda a pain. and i love an excuse to start a new spreadsheet.

we did it! happy 2024! i don't think i have anything else to add to this wrapup but if i think of something i'll tack it into the upcoming Normal Tuesdaypost tomorrow! good job good night and good luck everyone!

#tuesdayposting