#I want to disappear into the shadows and watch everything from afar

[raccoon-queer]

that bpd feeling when everything is so not okay that you can't even take steps to make it better

#ace speaks #I can't reach out #I can't talk about it without trying to make it a joke or changing the subject #I can't think about it without crying #my therapist hates it when I say I'm fucked up but really. what else could I call it? #I want to disappear into the shadows and watch everything from afar #it's too much to be here when I'm so lonely #I'll just fall into myself until I shrink beyond recognition or hit the ground

[liliannadelaphinehartifelt]

Alastor - [TOUCH STARVED]

xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxx

xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxx

A/N: Photo/Fanart Credit to @/Nyer_roth on Twitter (hiatus)

[ NSFW ] + [ MDNI ] + [ FEM/CAT HYBRID DEMON READER ]

xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxx

Touch Starved Alastor prefers your presence over anyone else’s in the Hotel. His shadows linger by your side if he’s not physically there and when he is it’s quite obvious to everyone how closely the Radio Demon is guarding you.

No one dares to breathe a word about his behavior but the moment he’s out of sight or ear shot Angel will tease you endlessly. “Seems you have Mr. Fancy Creep wrapped round your little finger, toots.” Your face flushes ten shades of red as the spider demon nudges your side while giggling at your flustered reaction. He knows -well everyone knows how you feel about Alastor- but you’ve made it a point to never let the overload onto your attraction to him.

Even if he already is aware of it…

Angel’s teasing doesn’t help your little crush dissolve as you wished it would, so with a huff and a rushed whisper you excuse yourself from the group. “N-no I don’t Angel and…I’m heading to bed. Goodnight…” Angle snickers at your deliberate deflecting, but says nothing else as you waltz up the staircase, barely listening to Charlie yelling “good night” to you, and failing to notice the dark mass of spectrums trailing your every step.

Touch Starved Alastor listens in on those pesky conversations the others have when it comes to you and him. You’re always so skittish and docile under their prying, blushing at the slightest implication of his attention being on you, and to say it intrigues him would be an understatement. Alastor isn’t one to entertain those who show him affection, let alone acknowledge it, but when it comes to you the overload’s mind runs rampant with devious desires. At first he ignores them, content with keeping your connection to him cordial, and that works for a time.

It doesn’t last forever though.

Especially when you unconsciously tend to him so reverently. You’re a people pleaser by nature -he’s sure of that- but the immediate stars in your eyes whenever he instructs you to do something strikes just the right nerve for him.

It’s always the simplest things, tedious tasks he burdens you with just to see your eagerness to please him on repeat, “My dear, would you be so kind as to hand me that book over there?” Your head lifts, hopeful eyes staring at him as you nod with a genuine smile, “Of course!” You chirp, walking right over to the bookshelf without question to acquire the item, and Alastor watches your every move.

The flutter of your lashes as you pinpoint the object, how you stand on your tip toes to reach it, and the gentle sway of your hair as you finally grasp the book. You’re so sweet, so gentle with everything, and Alastor spends hours trying to stop himself from thinking about your tender embrace being spared his way.

Touch Starved Alastor starts to lock himself in his room or radio tower more often than usual when he can’t seem to keep his distance. His shadows still lord over you but are never seen which makes it that much easier for him to watch you from afar.

His sudden disappearance and lack of socializing affects you heavily. You don’t smile as much and when you do the light in your eyes wanes. You’re still kind to everyone, but choose to sit alone during group activities, or wander the halls humming to avoid them all together.

Alastor takes notice of every frown adorning your face when someone mentions him or inquires as to where he is and for a split second guilt creeps its way into him seeing your energetic mood dwindle at his hands.

He can’t let this go on forever, not when you look so betrayed at the sound of his name, and mindlessly wander towards his empty room every night as if to check on him just to leave in fear of embarrassment.

Enough is enough.

Touch Starved Alastor finds you alone on a rare stormy night in Hell, an old book opened up to your curious eyes as you lay flat on your front across the parlor’s couch. He watches you from the shadows for a long while, studying the slight scrunch of your nose as your gaze happens open a certain line of text, and the way you gently kick your feet as your chin rests on the back of your hands.

He’s seen and met a mass amount of beings in his time in hell and not one has ever emitted anything close to your ethereal beauty. You swear you’re not a fallen angel to anyone who asks and it baffles him how a soul so light could end up here.

Unruly luck….maybe?

Fate, possibly?

He’ll figure it out one way or another.

“Hello, my dear, late night reading I see…” Alastors voice grasps your attention immediately, his usual staticky tone leaning towards normality as you peer up at him with a growing smile. “Yes…I couldn’t sleep,” you respond quietly, relatively shy around the overload, and trying hard not to seem overexcited to see him. You missed Alastor dearly the past few days but it would be embarrassing to show that longing outright….

The deer demon picked up on your excitement right away despite your attempts at casualness, his smile softening as you held his stare and bit your lip. Delicate fanged canines poking out just enough to prick your lower lip.

How adorable, Alastor inwardly muses at your nervous habit and continues with his light hearted interrogation. “Hm, I suppose a restless night can have that effect. ..Would you mind if I joined you then, darling?”

Touch Starved Alastor is elated when you nod gently, shifting to sit up properly, and give him a space beside you. “Of course Alastor…it gets lonely staying up by yourself. I’d appreciate the company.” Your sweet tone dazes him for a moment as he sits next to you, unconsciously disregarding his aversion to interpersonal space…

Odd…

He never situates himself this close to you, always looming, but never actively seeking your side. It’s strange to you at first but as he visibly relaxes you don’t mind the deliberate position he’s taken.

He could very well be tired or you might be hallucinating that he was putting an arm around your shoulders.

Either option didn’t ease the rapid pace of your heartbeat..

Alastor was careful with you, incredibly gentle as he pulled you to his side, and rested his chin on the top of your head. “Such a sweetheart you are, my dear.” He speaks quietly, oddly calm as you hum in agreement, your soft ears flattening as you breathe in his scent.

A smidge of brimstone mixed with the aroma bourbon and pine.

He smelled just like a lovely forest, a secure scent you wouldn’t mind getting used to, and tried to commit it to memory just in case Alastor never let you get this close to him again.

Touch Starved Alastor chuckles lowly when you breathe him in, finding your feline tendencies endearing, and listening to your soft purring become a vocal indicator of how comfortable you felt with him. You’d long forgotten the book, nuzzling your head under Alastor’s chin instead, getting lost in your innocent desire to be under him, and he makes no move to stop you.

If anything the radio demon welcomes your touch, sliding you onto his lap with ease, and that never ending smile of his becoming genuine when you absentmindedly compliment him. “…You smell…sweet,” you hum, speaking more to yourself than him, but he hears you and responds promptly. “Is that so, darling?”

You nod, head lifting to stare up at him through your lashes, “Mhm…I missed it..I…” you pause, face flushing red as the deer demon peers back at you, red eyes glinting with dormant affection as he studies your expressions.

“Come now, use your words dear…” he reassures you his patience isn’t waning with a gentle hum.

Alastor is tempted to watch your plush lips move as you struggle to speak up but it’s hard to resist when you finally whisper a confession -one you think he’ll be off put by…

“W-well I missed you entirely Alastor… a lot actually.” And there you go again, eyes wide with apprehensive hope, and ever present adoration. He’d felt his fair share of adrenaline rushes, experienced the “blood rushing to your head” urges that sinners and demons alike couldn’t resist, and though Alastor prided himself in remaining in control of such things…

You brought them out of him without even trying.

Ridiculous, truly…but the longer you fawned over him the less cordiality Alastor maintained.

Touch Starved Alastor lets his smile soften, deeply appreciating your timid vulnerability, and much to your relief he lets you know it. “Missed me? Well, I must have quite the effect on you to instill such a sentiment,” His tone is abundantly softer than usual, quietly echoing in the hotels parlor, and tickling the nerves in your ears.

They perk up along with your tail as he rests his hands on your waist, pulling you impossibly close until the only proper place you can latch your hands onto is the back of the carved mahogany frame of the couch. “Al…” you sigh softly, eyes fluttering shut as his grip on you tightens a tad in response.

When had he gotten so touchy? Better yet, why?

All logical questions that you were asking yourself weren’t granted answers as the overlord inhaled heavily. Breathing you in just as you’d done to him moments ago.

Your unsteady pulse, rising lust, slight confusion, and underlying fear of him coursing through your veins in waves. Alastor identified each emotion, practically tasting them on his tongue, and his hunger rose again from it.

He could just eat you alive at this rate and from the whine you let out as he trailed his hands down to your thighs, claws ripping right through the sheer white thigh high socks you’d paired with a modestly short nightgown made it abundantly clear to him you wouldn’t mind if he did.

How sweet you’d taste?

How the shaky whines you were letting out now could turn to bashful screams?

How sickeningly perfect you’d look broken, bloody, and marked by him and him alone?

He’d wondered about these things constantly…feverishly…

Touch Starved Alastor lets his mirage of being a “true gentleman” dissipate entirely when you subconsciously roll your hips down on him for much needed friction -and in an attempt to dissolve the pain his scratches on your skin brought.

Fuck. This. Alastor curses himself, swiftly repositioning you both in a blink of an eye. Your back hits the velvet cushions with a gentle ‘thud’, earning a soft gasp on your part that’s inevitably silenced by one of his shadows wrapping around your mouth, and another gingerly snaking round your waist. He chuckles as you squirm underneath him, clearly wanting to be in control of your own body, but what would you ever need that autonomy for?

He’s here for a reason, right?

Why grant you more agency than required?

“Comfortable, my dear?” The leering stag above you chides, grin wide as you groan in frustration, eyes sliding shut as he slips between your parted legs. His red irises show brighter as your lower halves press flush against each other and you shudder from the contact -inwardly congratulating yourself for not wearing much underneath your nightdress to begin with.

Alastor allowed your hands to reach for him, your delicate claws gripping his suit collar as firmly as possible, tugging him lower as you shifted under his weight to grind against him. “Patience is a virtue, sweetheart,” he half reprimands half teases as your bare slit passes over the crotch of his black dress pants. There was no doubt your slick was leaving a stain and if it were anyone else -in any other situation- Alastor would’ve had their head for ruining his attire.

Luckily, you were to receive anything but his wrath.

How fortunate…

Touch Starved Alastor feels himself going mad when you mindlessly use any part of him you can reach as a bid for more pleasure. Eyes watering, begging him to touch you, help you, and it’s one hell of a sight to see in his opinion. “Desperate aren’t we, darling?” His cooing drives you insane, large hands wandering under your nightgown to trace your warm skin -not helping your dazed state at all.

Alastor purposefully claws at your body, placing surface level scars on it, letting the small droplets of blood that escape his cuts paint your skin and his fingertips. You struggle every soften, train of thought lagging as pain and pleasure start to intertwine.

“….please don’t stop..”

“What a sick & twisted little thing you are..”

Tears run down your face, drool dripping from the corner of your lips, and your cunt leaking all over him and sofa. Blood starts to seep through your nightdress in random streaks and it’s only then that Alastor decide it’s redundant to keep it on you. “Let’s get rid of this, shall we?” That’s all the warning you get from the radio demon before you feel his claws shred it to pieces.

Thank heavens you hadn’t chosen your favorite one tonight or you’d be devastated…

“Much, much better, ma chère,” Alastor praises you as if the task was at your own hands -and to some degree it was for letting him get this far- and yet your face flushes a deep shade of red as you nod in agreement.

The shadowy tentacle covering your mouth tightens its grip, shifting sharply to expose your neck to him, and Alastor seizes the opening immediately. Taking his time finding your sensitive spots, marking them with his teeth and tongue until there’s dark bruises left behind, and you nearly came undone from the relentless precision of love bites he inflicts on you.

Touch Starved Alastor allows your hands wander wherever they please, quite taken with the feeling of your dainty claws raking down his back, or shifting up to pet his ears. They flicker about at your touch, ever so sensitive, and heightening the pleasure he gets from torturing you. Every sound you make, the shuddering moans against his lips, and the muffled cries that build in your chest when Alastor toys with you muddles his focus further.

Bit by bit you’re chipping away at his sanity by simply enjoying his caress and offering him yours.

Alastor isn’t one to succumb to pleading easily but when you’re given the chance to use your voice and beg for release without a second thought….he hasn’t got the gall to deny you.

Not when you’re looking up at him like you might die if he denies you, so worked up that you stutter, and shake uncontrollably.

“N-need to….p-please let me…come,” you whine as quietly as possible, ears laying flat on your head as he hums melodically in false consideration for your plight.

It’s fueling his already massive ego that you’re poised to come undone when he’s barely done a thing to you and he has half the mind to pull away and watch you fall to pieces…

You’d surely give him a show then, pouting helplessly, or cowering from embarrassment realizing how much of a mess you’ve made of yourself for him.

It’d be pure entertainment.

However, why waste a prime opportunity to see you utterly satisfied by him?

By his mere presence even.

The deer demon refuses to pass up such a rare occurrence, flipping your position again so your smaller frame sits atop his larger one. “F-fuck..” you hiss as you settle on top of him, eyes rolling to the back of your head when he guides your hips to keep riding him at a rough but languid pace. Alastor observes you above him for a long moment, smile widening when your hair falls in front of your bright eyes, and your hands splay across his chest to keep yourself steadily upright.

The scratches he’s left on you are still fresh, mixing with the tears that flow down your face, and your arousal pitifully dribbling down your inner thighs as well.

Exactly how he pictured you time and time again.

“You may,” he finally exhales, static completely gone from his voice, and hearing it elicits a newfound spark of heat in your core. Your legs shake involuntarily, hips stuttering in tight circles over his clothed erection as you chased your high. Alastor watches you intently, tonguing his cheek to keep from groaning, and his body running hotter than usual as your cunt drags against him.

Touch Starved Alastor can’t fathom how a soul as tender as yours can dwindle to filth in the midst of cumming. Head lulling at an angle while your back arches just right to define your silhouette in the dark room.

The coil in your stomach snaps faster than you can gauge a reaction. A scream threatening to leap from your chest as it washed over you, but his shadows return, clasping tight enough to muffle it. “Easy, my dear…you wouldn’t want to disturb the others, hm?” Alastor bucks his hips upward to make his point clear and you visibly jolt from the overstimulation he causes.

It was clear he needed his end met too and that brought a grin to your face as his shadows receded from your lips when you quieted down. “No…” you sigh, inching a hand lower to trace over the rise in his pants. Alastor stiffens under your touch, nearly snarling when you palm him slowly, eyes never leaving his as you do. Tempting and sweet as always, “Careful, Mon Cher,” he warns, voice thick with allure.

He’d only come to seek a warm body to torment, assuming he’d take care of his own needs later, but you -the ever so caring sinner you were- seemed intent to shoulder the task now.

You licked your lips, tongue grazing your fangs as your peered down at him defiantly with a warm smile, “M’ not one of your little puppets…” Alastor raised a brow at that, noting the mischievous glint in your eyes as you leaned forward, “….and I never will be.” You finish your statement, smiling wider before lowering yourself down his body. He lets you do as you please, stuck between observing, and enjoying the attention you give him.

It’s very rare to see the overload so willing to be tested, but you made your stance clear with a singular lick up his clothed length with the softest smile on your lips. “Fuck…” he groans then, static nonexistent again as you playfully repeated the action until he became agitated enough to fist a handful of your hair and drag you back up to face him.

“It’s not very polite to tease, sweetheart.”

You smirk and reach for his belt, skillfully undoing it without breaking eye contact, feigning humility through half lidded eyes“Then would you be so kind as to correct my manners then?”

“It’d be my pleasure, darling,”

xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx xxx

My head was all over the place with this one ❤️ I need some sleep…

[ BONUS CONTENT + ]

He’s a literal walking red flag 🚩 and unfortunately my favorite color is red 😭 Credits to the creator 🖤

#Spotify #alastor smut #alastor x oc #alastor x reader #alastors radioshow #alastor fluff #alastor headcanons #human alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel #alastor x you #alastor x y/n #fanfic #writing prompt #writing

[fragileheartbeats]

⌗ 𝘈𝘝𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘜𝘙𝘐𝘕𝘌 𝘏𝘊 ⁝ 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦 ( ♱ )

˚꒰♡꒱‧ Hi there! Before you read this, you should know that English is not my first language Hope you enjoy!

Many describe Aventurine as a yandere who would hurt or kidnap his darling, but I can't see it. To me, he would be one of the softest yanderes imaginable. He’s painfully aware of his feelings, knowing they’re unhealthy and twisted. He tries to control them, but it’s never enough. His love for you is too overwhelming, too consuming.

And it hurts. It hurts like a thousand knives piercing his heart, because it's killing him. It hurts because he doesn’t want to harm you, but it also hurts because he can’t bear to be without you. Each day, the struggle between his desire to be near you and his need to protect you from himself tears him apart.

He would do anything to protect you, becoming your shadow, guarding you from every danger—even himself. So, he makes the hardest choice: he avoids you. He stops talking to you, stops smiling at you, stops watching you from afar. It’s a self-imposed exile that tortures him more than any physical pain ever could.

You’re left confused and hurt. Why is he avoiding you? Just weeks ago, he was so sweet, so attentive. You thought maybe—just maybe—he had fallen for someone like you. How foolish. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Your heart aches with the sting of rejection and the bitterness of unfulfilled dreams.

If only you knew... If only you knew how deeply he loves you. He loves you so much that he’s willing to destroy himself rather than see you cry. He loves you so much that he would tear his own heart apart rather than see your smile fade. He knows himself. He knows you. He knows that if he stayed close, he would hurt you. His feelings are a storm, a dangerous maelstrom that could sweep you away.

He knows you’re too precious. He could be a monster. He would be a monster. A monster who feeds on your love and tears. A monster hungry for your body and pain. He knows it. He knows it all. And that knowledge shatters him.

Because he doesn’t want to be a monster. He doesn’t want to hurt you. He wants to be your shining knight, always protecting you, even if you never know it. He dreams of a world where he can hold you without fear, where his love doesn’t come with the risk of destruction.

He would do anything to see your smile, even if it means sacrificing his own. Each time he sees you from a distance, his heart breaks a little more. He whispers your name in the dead of night, a prayer, a lament, a vow to keep you safe. Even if he has to carve out his own heart, he will do it, because your happiness means more to him than his own life.

In the silent agony of his solitude, he watches you move on, believing you’ll find someone better, someone worthy of your love. His heart bleeds with every step you take away from him, but he endures it. He endures it because he loves you too much to let his darkness touch you. And as he fades into the background, he finds a twisted solace in the knowledge that he’s done the right thing, even if it destroys him.

Aventurine's love is a tragic symphony, a beautiful yet sorrowful melody that will never reach your ears. It’s a love that lives in shadows, hidden from the light, forever unseen, forever aching. And as he stands alone, watching over you from afar, he whispers one last promise to the wind:

“I will always love you, even if it means I must disappear. For your happiness, for your safety, I will sacrifice everything. Even myself.”

@ 𝒇𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒔 . 𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑒, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑡, 𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑦 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘𝑠 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑒𝑏𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑠.

#ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤ 𓇼ㅤ ㅤ𓂂ㅤㅤ ˚ㅤㅤ ◌ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #aventurine x reader #yandere aventurine #yandere aventurine x reader #yandere hsr #yandere honkai star rail #yandere x reader #yandere #star rail aventurine #aventurine angst #aventurine x you #yandere imagines #yandere headcanons #hsr imagines #yandere honkai star rail x reader #aventurine headcanons #aventurine x y/n #honkai: star rail x reader #honkai star rail headcanons #yandere obsession #lovesick #love sick

[yawarakaizai]

Yan!dazai mindbreaking angel!reader ooo

ⵌ WATCH HER BREAK JUST LIKE A DOLL

SENDER Angel!Reader (Fem) RECIPITENT Yandere!Dazai (BSD) CONTENTS NSFW DARK CONTENT 16+ , obsession/possession, drugging, mind-breaking, reader is a hostage?, unhealthy relationship, dubcon/nc??, abuse (physical implied + mental), slight somnophilia, lowkey angsty, dazai is an asshole!, smut part isn't really detailed (WARNING; This relationship is unhealthy and should not be used as an example. Reader here does not hold Dazai accountable. If you are in an abusive relationship, please seek help from someone you trust or a professional! This fanfic does not idolise nor condone abuse within relationships) NOTE All these years of feeling inadequate and dumb. You were proud to have grown accustomed to Dazai's routine, even if he had promised you months ago he had changed. COMPANY Dolly

A/N combined 2 asks I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ASK BUT IT WAS A YANDERE DAZAI NSFW IDEA im so sorryy ... also any other yan dazai req ! !! srry for the long wait ;; !! reader is an angel !! she was kind of created ,,? kinda like sigma !! the og req had an idea abt aphrodisiacs but ... not sure if i want to write about them just yet :( so sorry!!

Dutiful and pristine, you were a model wife.

Delicate and gorgeous. Just how he liked you to be.

You were brought her to serve as his prize. His reward for years of watching you from afar, stalking you like a lions meal. And you, pure and kind-hearted, not once ever suspected a thing.

Dazai was your co-worker after all. A smart, handsome man with a positive future.

Back before this all, you were nothing but a mere fascination to not only him, but your peers as well. You were never offended or hesitant to answer questions others would have about you. How you came to be, whether you remember anything, and if those feathers of yours regrow.

You coped with everything by dissociating as much as possible. If you could believe hard enough - Dazai was still the Dazai you knew before. The man next to you who'd pout when ordered to finish his report, the one who would turn to you and try to flirt or make you giggle, knowing Kunikida would never dare give out to you.

How could anyone, after all? You only manifested a few years ago. What was it, eleven, or twelve. You can't remember. There was little you remember anyway.

The first few months with Dazai were a blur. You'd have blacked out for the majority of the day until he'd wake you up and force you to eat. If you'd refuse, he'd starve you until you'd beg.

You had tried to protest by going days without food or water but he always got his way in the end. You had to give in at some point.

The biggest obstacle was finding the guts to hate Dazai.

You were afraid to hate him. You were afraid to hate.

He'd treat you so gently and with love. Funnily enough, you blamed yourself for it all. You didn't know why or how, but you felt like if you had done things different, none of this would have happened.

Osamu was sweet. He always did what was right. You respected Kunikida and Fukuzawa immensely. If they trust Dazai, then so did you.

If you knew that you were a lamb handed to a wolf, maybe you would have ran much earlier.

Dazai did not show himself upfront. No. First, it was the mind games. The ghastly figures that would appear outside of your window in the form of blackened shadows, doors you remember closing being wide open when you return home, bangs and creaks around your home when you lived alone, your items disappearing from their usual spot, laundry vanishing completely, and countless mysterious messages from anonymous.

Second, it was you asking for help. You turned to who you admired best. The Armed Detective Agency. Ranpo scanned your phone. He read each message out loud before looking at you, then back down at your screen. He slid it back towards you. " There's nothing suspicious. It's just a prank. "

You felt relief. Ranpo had his ability, after all. The ability to figure out any mystery. He could not be wrong.

How dumb of you to think Ranpo would not be the first person Dazai would go to for his sick joke.

Third was the fever. It hit you like a brick. It was the first time you had been infected with a human illness. Dazai kindly offered to tend to you in his free-time, as everyone else was too busy. You were grateful that Dazai, an important member of the ADA, was sacrificing his time in helping you. He'd stop by almost every day and night to feed you and make sure you're alright. The more you drank that chalky water he'd give you daily before bed, the more you lost your ability to walk.

Fourth, was the inevitable. You waking up in a bed that was harder than yours. Upon observing around you, you realised you weren't in your house. And you don't recall ever sleeping next to Dazai. Naturally, you were afraid. You were in hysterics while he tried to calm you down, telling you stories on how it's safer for you to be here, and that you were an ungrateful bitch for not being grateful enough to him.

You didn't want to hear any of it. So? You were kept in his lovely basement.

There, you were badly treated. Sleeping on cold concrete and eating what scraps he'd leave on the floor for you like some animal - any form of resistance was met with harsh punishment.

You lacked survival instincts. You not once ever felt the need to. Working in the ADA, you were nothing but an accountant. You'd hear about the missions they'd go on, but to you it all seemed like the things you'd see in action films.

But this was real. The way your heart pounded in your ears every time you'd hear steps coming down and the way he'd tug your hair 'till your scalp would burn is something that the actors would never be able to portray properly.

It took you a while to realise you weren't going to make any progress by doing the opposite of what he wanted.

Though, you were admittedly conflicted.

You provided Dazai something interesting. If you let him use you, to spare yourself of his harsh punishments, would he get bored of you? Would he rid of you completely? Would he treat you more terribly to purposely make you act out just so he'd have a reason to strike you?

These were questions that would keep you up.

You couldn't be strong-willed for long. Hope that Kunikida or anyone else would come looking for you dwindled as the days went by and none would come but Dazai.

At some point, you had lost your voice for a while. In that period, Dazai took complete advantage of the fact. When you could do nothing but thrash and cry until you submit underneath him.

He'd pull out, collapse next to you and hold you close to his bandaged chest and apologise until he fell asleep with your hot breath against his skin.

Dazai had been your first time. He took an angel's virginity. You were frozen for the rest of the night. You were almost neutral to what had happened. You even wiped his tears away with your thumb. He apologised. He must surely be remorseful. He promised he wouldn't do it again.

You lost your halo that day.

'' Fetch me some water, I'm thirsty. "

His hand came off your head where it had been caressing.

You looked up at him through long lashes, slowly nodding your head and raising to unstable feet.

Ever since you were allowed to stay out of the basement, he's been helping you regain your ability to walk after the drugs had left your knees shaky.

Your movement was slow but gradual, at least.

If you wished to remain with Dazai, you'd have to obey him. And obey you did.

You fetched him his requested glass of water albeit spilling a tad bit on your way back, you presented him with it.

He peered in, then slouched back into the couch, gaze returning to the television screen. " I said orange juice. "

You were sure he said water.

" But you said water. " Your voice was meek compared to his.

" Are you saying I am lying? "

That shut you up.

You apologised, and travelled back to the kitchen to throw away the water and replace it with orange juice.

You'd bring it back, and he'd look at you with disappointment. " Why are you bringing me orange juice when I asked for apple juice? "

He sounded so convincing that you thought maybe you were mishearing. You held the orange juice in your hand tightly, apologised, and left to get the apple juice.

By the time you returned, you were shaking. The apple juice was dripping from the overfilled glass and onto the floor. You were trembling. " It's- It's apple juice. Because y-ou said.. "

Your gaze was so distant. You were so far away. You were no longer on this Earth. Dazai had to keep you grounded.

" You must be taking me for a fucking idiot. "

He slapped the glass right from your hand, your whole body jolted in shock when the glass shattered against the floor.

You two had just been cuddling on the couch, watching a noir movie like a happy couple would.

Dazai had to keep you grounded. He had to keep you on a leash lest you wander.

" Get over here. " He sighed out after a long pause. Instinctively, you answered, " No. "

It's been so long since you were punished. You didn't want to go back to them.

" I didn't do anything wrong ", your voice croaked out to reason. You should have figured at some point Dazai would get bored of a normal life style.

" I said get over here, Y/N, my patience is already running low. I'm not going to hit you. "

And no matter what you've been through, you'd wake up praying Dazai was kinder. He had overheard your nightly prayers one day and in an act of irony or sympathy - hung a cross over your bed.

You fiddled with the hem of your skirt before waddling to between his spread thighs. Hand reaching for your hip and guiding you down to sit on his lap, you avoided eye contact.

You were clearly afraid of being punished for something that was not your fault. You couldn't tell Dazai it wasn't your fault. That would be calling Dazai a liar. And that would get you hit. Good wives don't get hit.

True to his word, he did not raise his hand to you at all.

Once he opened his mouth to speak, you attentively turned to him. His training worked wonders on you. He made himself your God in a matter of months. You no longer worried your pretty little head on whether Kunikida would save you. All you had to do was clean around the house and prepare Dazai's meal - living to serve your husband.

" You've been such a good girl, don't ruin it with this, 'kay? " He didn't sound mad anymore, but you could still pick up on the fact he was not exactly happy with you either.

" Yes, 'samu. " You nod, toying with your fingers nervously.

" You're such a sweet wife. So dumb. So cute. Love seeing you panic. "

You bit your bottom lip at that, chewing on skin.

'' D'ya think It's about time we started our own family? "

You thought at first you didn't hear him properly. You knew you were trying to convince yourself so.

" Ahah.. " You were hesitant. He picked up on it. His dark brown eyes felt like lasers. " I don't think I can. I'd love to, 'samu, but I can't. "

He let go of his soft grasp on your hip to allow you to stand up.

It was 9pm. You should head to bed.

His silence and poker face felt foreboding.

" Goodnight, love. " You tried to remain cheerful.

You went to bed earlier than Dazai. You climbed into your shared bed after having taken your nightly medication.

You fluffed out your wings - once white, now grey - then tossed and turned until you slept.

" Hah.. hah.. "

The burning heat is what hit you first.

Confusion was second.

" Wakin' up, pretty baby? "

Your mouth opened by itself before your eyes did, and when you tried to speak, to ask what is going on, you let out a soft moan.

You feel something sink in deeper in your pussy, the wooden bed frame hitting against a wall. Oh.

" 'Samu! " Your eyes shot open upon realising what was happening. Dazai had not done this for a while. The room was dark. Judging by how dry your mouth was, you had been fast asleep for a while.

Dazai was propped on his knees between your thighs, naked from what you could make out.

You looked further down to realise that he had shoved his dick in you while you were asleep. Your nightgown was pulled up over your stomach and his hands were holding on loosely to your hips.

Your hand reached out to grip onto his wrist, your legs unable to close. " No, you said you were gonna be better, you said no more of this. " Oh, you sweet poor child.

" It's alright. " He responded casually, pulling out just to slam back in. Although your vision was limited, you could feel his piercing stare studying your contorting features. " Just this once, yeah? "

You remembered your conversation with Dazai earlier. The sudden question about having a child.

When you tightened around the base of his shaft, he knew what you were thinking.

" Don't get all scared, baby. You'd make an amazing mom. " He would bend down, his mouth next to your ear as he'd begin thrusting.

You lay unresponsive and silent, staring at the ceiling - your only solace.

His huffs, groans and sighs muffle themselves on your pillow, your body would temporarily jolt in spasms with each orgasm.

Dazai continued for hours.

At some point, your hands were tangled in messy brown hair, your mouth hung and your voice would plead for 'more', 'there', 'deeper'.

Your sweet husband never pulled you back when you drifted off to space with your longing gaze.

He barely even met you in the eye.

Dazai finished his rounds before you noticed. It was a period of him not touching you that made you turn your head sideways to meet him laying next to you, his chest still raising and falling as he'd regain his breath.

You hadn't moved your body.

Adjusted to the dark, you couldn't help but stare at the pitiful man who spoke nothing to you.

An emptiness weighed your heart down and the liquid love he had planted in you seeped - unwelcomed.

You still felt bad for him. Surely, definitely, this was not his fault.

" I'd like a girl. "

Your lips trembled, you smiled to hide it.

" Two.. daughters. "

The corners of your lips quivered with your fake expression. He could see your eyes gloss and your shivering body, blinking rapidly until your tears slid down.

You never did want children. Not with Dazai, at least. Not for another few years. Not here, not now, not with him. Not this Dazai.

He left you waiting for a while, until he rolled onto his back and looked up at the ceiling that enamoured you with amazement when he had made love to you.

" Yeah. "

He sounded uncertain, before continuing his response. You had expected it. All these years of feeling inadequate and dumb. You were proud to have grown accustomed to Dazai's routine, even if he had promised you months ago he had changed.

" 'm sorry. "

" I know. "

©yawarakaizai 2023 ﹒﹒ reblogs appreciated! requests open :3

#dazai x reader #yandere dazai #bsd x reader #yandere dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader

[belovedspector]

Love at First Sight's for Suckers (At Least, It Used to Be)

Pairing: Jake Lockley x f!reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: Jake can’t help but notice you when you become a regular at his favorite diner.

Content: Fluff!

A/N: Title is from “I Never Planned on You” from Newsies. I’ve never written for Jake before, and I haven’t read the comics, so I don’t have much to go off of, but I figured I’d give it a shot. I hope I did okay! Enjoy! :)

Masterlist

Jake Lockley knows his place. He’s the protector of the system, keeping Marc and Steven out of harm’s way and doing Khonshu’s dirty work. He doesn’t have time for “earthly pleasures,” as Khonshu had once put it. He doesn’t really have a life outside of protecting his alters and the travelers of the night, and he’s fine with that. He’s content to lurk in the shadows if it means Marc and Steven getting to live their best lives. He treasures what interaction he does get, when he’s driving his cab through the city or getting food late at night after a mission. He tries not to dwell on it, though; there’s no sense in mourning what he can’t have.

Jake notices everything. It’s his job, to always be on high-alert, even when he’s not the one fronting. So, when you start showing up at his favorite diner every Friday night like clockwork, he notices. He observes from afar. From that first time you walked in, the bell tinkling to announce your presence, he’d been…interested in you. He’s not sure why—it’s not like you pose a threat. You should fade into the background, just like everyone else.

But, you don’t.

Jake can’t help but take note of everything you do—the way you always say your “please”s and “thank you”s to the waitress, your soft laugh, your sweet smile, the ungodly amount of sugar you put in your coffee. He’s good at watching people; it’s part of his job, after all, so he’s able to absorb you and your habits without drawing suspicion from you or anyone else. Some might call it creepy, but Jake means no harm, and he can’t help his…infatuation with you. He doesn’t know what’s happening to him.

One night, he finds himself rambling as he drives around the city. He likes to talk out loud to himself in the safety of his cab; it gives him a chance to make sense of his thoughts, and it’s not like he has anyone else to share them with.

He starts off by talking himself through the details of his upcoming mission, but he soon finds his mind wandering to bright eyes and the scent of coffee. You.

“She’s really something, huh?” Jake says to himself. “I—I don’t know what it is about her. I can’t stop thinking about her.”

“I think you humans call it a ‘crush.’” Khonshu suddenly appears hunched over in the back seat of Jake’s cab, and, if he was a less skilled driver, Jake absolutely would have crashed. As it is, he jumps almost imperceptibly in his seat, swerving the tiniest bit before regaining control of the vehicle.

“What?” Jake asks, not even sparing Khonshu a glance in the rear-view mirror. He’s used to the god’s antics by now.

“It appears you have a crush, Jake Lockley.”

“I don’t get crushes,” Jake protests. “Don’t have time for that shit.” He grips the steering wheel more tightly, the leather of his gloves straining against his knuckles.

“You’re right; you don’t have time,” Khonshu agrees, “so I suggest you nip this little problem in the bud, before it interferes with our work.”

“What, you want me to kill her?” he deadpans.

“No, nothing that extreme. I was going to suggest finding a new diner.”

“But I like that diner.”

“Then you’d best find a way to ignore the girl.”

With that, Khonshu disappears, and Jake mutters some choice words about the bird in the quiet of his car.

It’s Friday night again. Jake sits alone at his usual booth—in the corner, with his back to the wall, so he can continually scan the entire diner for any threats. He alternates between sipping at his coffee and taking bites of his blueberry pie while scanning the newspaper.

The door opens, the bell ringing along with it, and Jake instinctively looks up.

It’s you.

Jake casts his eyes back down to the sports page. Khonshu had given him orders, and he intends to follow them.

His plan is going great. He’s not thinking about you, not even a little bit. But, shit, now he’s thinking about how he’s not thinking about you. Does that count as thinking about you?

Jake returns his coffee cup to the table with a little more force than necessary. He can feel a headache coming on.

Get it together, Lockley.

He looks up again to do another sweep of the interior, when he notices you’re not sitting in your usual spot. No, you’re…walking towards him. Surely, you’re just going to use the bathroom past his seat, right?

No such luck. You stop at his booth, standing awkwardly with your hands clasped in front of you.

Slowly, Jake moves his eyes from his newspaper and allows them to find yours. He’s never seen you up close before, and, God, you’re even more breathtaking when he can see the sparkle of your eyes and the way your lips curve upward into a soft smile.

“Um, hi,” you start, rocking a little on your feet. “Sorry to bother you. I was just wondering if you had a pen?”

Jake’s not very well-versed in pickup lines, but he’s pretty sure that can’t be one, right? He stares at you for a few beats, dumbfounded that you’re really speaking to him, before he pulls himself together.

He clears his throat and answers, “Uh, yes.” He reaches for the pen he always keeps in his jacket pocket and hands it to you.

He can’t help but notice the way your soft, warm fingers brush against his as the pen exchanges hands.

“Thank you!” you say, and you sound so sincere. “I just wanted to do today’s crossword. I’ll have this back before you know it.”

“Sure,” Jake forces out as you turn on your heel, back to what he’s begun thinking of as “your” booth.

He goes back to his own paper, definitely not thinking about you and your sweet smile and soft hands. It’s by complete coincidence that the next page he turns to has the daily crossword puzzle. He’s never been much for puzzles; that’s more Steven’s thing. Still, he takes a look.

Across 1. An infatuation with another person

It’s five letters. It can’t be anything other than “crush.” Jake groans. He scans the rest of the clues and notices they all seem to revolve around love. It dawns on him that Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. So, maybe the universe isn’t totally fucking with him, after all.

Jake has just about finished his pie when you come bounding over. You don’t wait for him to look up before you’re speaking.

“Thank you again!” you say, placing his pen back on the table near his coffee cup.

You’re already turning to go back to your booth, but Jake can’t just let you go. Screw Khonshu’s orders, he thinks.

“Wait,” he calls to you. He half-expects you to ignore him, to keep walking away, but you do turn around and take a step closer to him. Shit, now he needs to think of something to say to you. “That was, uh, fast,” he says lamely.

You beam at him, and it’s just about the prettiest thing Jake has ever seen. “Oh, yeah, I used to do them with my dad all the time, so I’ve gotten pretty good at them.” Your eyes drop to his newspaper that sits forgotten on the table, still open to the puzzle page. “Oh, do you do crosswords, too?” you ask, and you look like you’re genuinely interested in his answer.

“Oh, uh, not really.” Jake’s hand comes up to rub the back of his neck nervously. Since when does he get nervous?

“Ah,” you say, nodding wisely, “you must be more of a Sudoku guy.”

“Uh, yeah.”

Great conversation skills, Lockley, he chastises himself.

“Well, thanks again for the pen. I hope I didn’t keep you from your Sudoku for too long…” You trail off, and Jake realizes, belatedly, that you’re waiting for him to offer his name.

“Jake,” he provides, putting on his most charming smile.

You smile right back, telling him your own name.

“Pretty name,” he remarks.

“Thanks, I got it for my birthday.”

Jake just stares at you for a moment before the joke lands, and then he’s laughing—like, genuinely laughing. He can’t remember the last time this has happened.

He notices you seem a little flustered. Maybe he laughed too hard? Maybe it wasn’t even a joke, and he just totally misread the situation? Maybe—

“Wow, I don’t think anyone’s ever actually laughed at that one,” you say with a slight chuckle of your own.

“I liked it,” Jake says honestly, as if you couldn’t already tell. Before he can second guess himself, he’s asking, “Can I buy you a cup of coffee?”

“Oh!” A look of surprise crosses your face. “Um, yeah, I’d like that. May I?” you ask, gesturing to the bench seat across from him.

“Please,” he says with a wave of his hand.

You slide into the booth as Jake gets the attention of the waitress and orders two coffees.

“Anything else?” the waitress asks, looking between the two of you expectantly, pen ready against her notepad.

“The pie’s really good,” Jake tells you. “My treat.”

You seem hesitant. “Oh, no, I couldn’t—”

“Come on,” he encourages with a smile.

“It is really good,” the waitress chimes in. 

“Well, okay,” you relent. “One slice of”—you look down at the table to scan the menu briefly—“chocolate cream pie, please.”

“Coming right up,” the waitress says with a smile and a click of her pen.

The time passes quickly, and the conversation between you and Jake flows as freely as the coffee. All that’s left of your pie is an empty plate with a few stray crumbs. You’re laughing at some comment Jake made when you glance down at your watch.

“Shit,” you say, your brows furrowing together in worry.

“Everything okay?” Jake asks.

“Yeah, I just didn’t realize how late it had gotten,” you say. An apologetic look crosses your face.

Jake checks his own watch. 2:53 am. He really should be getting back home, so Steven and Marc can wake up in the morning without suspecting anything.

“Can I drive you home?” he offers.

“Oh, that’s okay.” You shake your head. “I’m just a couple blocks over.”

“It’s late. I’d feel better if I knew you got home safely.”

“You’re sure it’s no trouble?” you ask hesitantly.

“Not at all,” he says with a smile. He’s smiled a lot tonight.

“Well, lead the way,” you say as you both exit the booth.

Jake throws a wad of cash on the table—more than enough to cover the coffee and pie—and walks you to his cab parked out front.

“You’re a cab driver?” you ask, sounding intrigued.

“I am,” Jake says as he opens the passenger’s door for you.

You pick up right where you left off at the diner, intermittently giving Jake directions to your apartment. He doesn’t want the night to end, but, soon enough, he’s parking in front of your building.

You start to unbuckle your seat belt but pause and turn to him. “Hey, can I borrow your pen again?”

“Oh, uh, sure,” Jake says, digging it out of his pocket and handing it over once more.

You take it with a smile and reach into your pants pocket. You pull out a crumpled napkin and quickly write something before handing both the napkin and pen to Jake.

Jake looks down to find your name and phone number written on the napkin.

You smile, looking a little shy. “In case you want to see me before next Friday,” you explain.

Jake doesn’t even think about the implication that you’ve noticed him at the diner every week, just like he’s noticed you. No, he’s too excited about the fact that you want to see him again, maybe even to go on a proper date. He hopes you can’t tell that he’s blushing in the dim glow of the cab’s ceiling light.

“Good night, Jake,” you say, finally unbuckling your seat belt and opening the door.

Normally, he’d do the gentlemanly thing and open the door for you, but he’d been too caught up in this surreal moment. Next time, he thinks, because there definitely will be a next time.

“Good night,” he echoes, still in a bit of a daze. He watches as you walk up the stairs to your apartment, making sure you’re safely inside before he pulls away from the curb.

Jake will deal with Khonshu’s wrath over disobeying orders. It will be more than worth it, if it means getting to see you again.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! Please feel free to let me know what you think! :)

#moon knight #mcu #jake lockley #jake lockley x reader #x reader #jace writes

[badasgirlfriend]

Love On The Down Low | Bada Lee Social Media AU

pairings: bada lee x zhong lei

prev - masterlist - next

a/n: sorry for not updating i was going through some shit but im back and i def missed these two, hope u enjoy it😈

tw: suicidal thoughts pls dont read it if you are triggered by it

taglist: { @1luvkarina , @hallotherenicetomeetyou @fillthwvoid , @kdacase @prilux @jjlovesbada @waveartistry , @dkluvs , @pinksults , @tikitsune , @b1ackbunny , @adaiasafira, @froufrousnowman , @99ycs, @badaslali , @italiekim , @saturnushasmyback , @heedoya @fairiechuu @itsbokutosjuicyass , @tnu-ree @jesuschrist2006 , @ssivinee , @downbadforbada , @starryelling , @pupbistro }

Lei slid her phone into her bag and watched from afar as Bada sat on a nearby bench. Her face was hidden behind her signature bucket hat, the brim casting a shadow over her features.

The chinese girl let out a sigh as she thought how late it is for Bada to be outside, especially in a place she doesn't know. It had been several days since she had last seen the older girl, and she was beginning to worry.

She knew that Bada was going through a tough time, but she was trying her best to be understanding and supportive. She can't do much when Bada had been pushing her away, making it difficult for Lei to help her.

She pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling overwhelmed. She never asked to be a babysitter, but she had somehow ended up as one.

"I don't know how much longer I can do this" she sighed. "God, give me a sign, should I keep this up?"

"Is she crazy?"

"I think so"

Lei lowered her head, meeting the gazes of two kids. They were probably no more than 14 years old, and yet they stared at her with a mixture of confusion

"What are you staring at?" she yelled "Don't you have better things to do?"

"Don't you have better things to do than talk to no one?" the young girl mocked.

"Babe, stop it before she cries." the boy next to her said, giggling. Lei watched him closely, he seemed familiar

"Aren't you two supposed to be sleeping right now? It's past your bedtime," Lei said with a mischievous grin.

"Alright, stop grandma-" one of the kids shot back, rolling their eyes.

Lei smiled as she recognized the boy. "Aren't you Felix's cousin?"

She glanced over at the boy, now smirking when she recognized him, but her smirk deepened when she saw his smile disappear "Aren't you Felix's cousin?"

He grabbed his girlfriend's hand and pulled her away, a mixture of embarrassment and haste in his face

Lei laughed, amused by the couple's reaction "I'll be having a word with him" she said, watching the couple disappear into the distance.

Sighing, she looked at the park. Bada was still there, alone. She didn't want to go up to her, but she knew she had to. This was it, she thought to herself. It was going to be now or never.

As she took those first few steps towards Bada, she already felt her mind spinning with the possibilities.

Her heart pounded in her ears, each thudding beat like a hammer against her chest. Her hands trembled slightly, as if they might fail her at any moment.

It's not that deep...

She drew closer, still unable to see Bada's face. The older girl had hidden her face with her hands.

Bada wasn't okay.

Even an outsider could see it. Her days felt like a prison, with no escape in sight. The scandal, the comments, the constant hate. It was getting to her. The pressure was building and building, and Bada felt like she was suffocating.

This whole thing was funny, really. Why were her fans so quick to turn against her? Without a shred of proof, they were willing to throw her under the bus and bury her, just because a random girl she didn't know said so.

Just one sentence. One. And it destroyed everything.

This was her dream, and now it was being stolen away. She had made it this far, and the dream was within her grasp. But it was out of her reach now, stolen away by an allegation that could not be proven.

She could feel the sleeves of her hoodie being soaked by the tears that flowed down her cheeks. She didn't care. She needed to let it all out, and if a few tears ruined her hoodie in the process, so be it. Another cry rose up from her, all of her emotions bottled up and finally being released. It was too much, but it felt like such a relief at the same time.

It was scary because the thought of ending it all wasn't leaving her mind and it was sounding good. Everyone would be happy and relieved, even she would be in peave

She wouldn't be anyones bother, many people would be happy. After all she's doing them a favor and listening to them

She knew her members were right, she wasn't the Bada she used to be. The old her wasn't rude to strangers, didn't snap at everyone around her. Heck, she would never tell a gorgeous girl to leave her alone.

Not the time Bada…...

She took a deep breath and rubbed her hands across her face. She wiped away her tears, but her eyes remained swollen and red. Suddenly, she heard the snap of a twig behind her. She froze

What if it's dispatch…?

So many things were running through her mind, all at once. And for the first time, Bada felt a sense of relief as she heard her voice.

"Bada, are you okay?"

"Im fine" Her mind was a mess, and she was far from okay.

She didn't need to look up to know where she was. The warmth next to her told her all she needed to know.

"From afar away, you looked like a dealer " she chuckled, leaning back as her eyes rested on Bada's figure. "-or like you're having a mental breakdown. So... I'm going with the latter. Are you okay, Bada?"

"Do I look okay, Zhong?"

Bada finally turned to face Lei, and there was a slight hint of annoyance on her face. She wasn't too fond of the girl, that much was obvious. She also hated how kind and comforting she was, despite their rocky start.

Bada loathed how her voice sent shivers down her spine at every word and how she looked so effortlessly beautiful without even trying.

Lei bit her lip as if deep in thought, her eyes never leaving Bada's. The cold wind blew through Bada's hair, making it blow in unexpected directions. She was unable to look away. She studied the girl next to her, she knew she was crying. It doesn't take a genius to get that

But fuck did she look beautiful



"Hmm." Lei looked lower, taking in Bada's hidden face under her hat. "Red eyes, that means the dealer part is true."

Bada scoffed and turned her head away from Lei, trying to hide her small smile.

"I needed fresh air"

"Right, you needed fresh air" Lei nodded. "I understand, I'd feel the same if I was locked up ignoring everyone."

Bada shook her head, as if amused by her own actions. "Sorry about that."

"I know it's hard to live with a stranger, especially in this situation, I'm not saying we have to be best friends, but I meant it when I said earlier that you can always come to me for anything."

Bada stayed silent, not responding to her, so Lei continued "You don't need to keep everything inside you I know what it feels like for everyone to suddenly hate you, and to feel like no one understands you-"

"You don't understand." Bada cut her off harshly

Lei sighed, a hint of annoyance filling her voice. "Believe me, I do. I was also a trainee once, and I have an idol brother. I know everything."

"I'm fine really" Bada lied "Sometimes it gets too much that's all"

Lei nodded, she wasn't being entirely honest but it's a start "That's understandable"

A silence fell between them, and both girls just stared at the swings in front of them. They didn't speak, just listened to the sounds of the wind blowing through the park. It wasn't an awkward silence, but Bada still couldn't stand it. She couldn't stand being alone with her thoughts, so she decided to speak up again.

"What's up with you hating Hann?" Bada taunted with a smirk on her lips

Lei's face was caught off guard by the sudden question. How did she know that "W-what?"

"You said it's not that good" Bada repeated. "Now I know not everyone has good taste, but I'm curious. What did you mean by that?"

Lei rolled her eyes again, her tone turning haughty. "Really, Bada? Implying that I don't have good taste?"

"Hey just saying"

"Wait, how do you know about that?" Lei's face twisted into a smirk as she flicked Baka's hat. Bada scowled pushing her hand away

"Are you stalking me on twitter?"

Bada shook her head, too quickly for her liking "No I wasn't stalking you. Soojin just sent me your twitter account when she told me I was gonna live with you so I saw that tweet on accident."

"Sure," Lei replied in a teasing tone, a small smile now lighting up her face. "Follow me next time, no need to stalk me in secret."

"Don't change the topic" Bada chided her, now turning fully towards Lei.

"I was joking when I said Hann isn't good. It's actually one of my favorite songs" Lei said as she gathered her knees and put her chin on her knees.

"It was just to piss off my best friend" she added with a grin

"Hanni right? The one with Yeeun's left toe username" fuck Bada for giving herself this easy, now she really sounds like a stalker "Yeeun loved her by the way"

"If I tell Hanni about this, she'll pass out." Lei laughed softly before adding "She's a huge fan of your group."

Bada smiled, the first genuine one that Lei has ever seen. "Well, I'll make sure she gets a signed album from all of us." Bada's smile quickly disappeared "If I ever go back" her tone suddenly growing cold like a winter storm.

"You produce almost all of your group's songs right?" Lei leaned closer, their shoulders now almost touching.

Bada stared at her for a moment, confused she nodded. Lei smiled, reaching out her hand.

"Come on, let's go somewhere." She continued, shaking the plastic burger king bag in front of Bada.

"I know a place you'll like. Plus we can share this burger" she said with a wink.

"I'm not sure-" Bada started, her tone unsure as she stared at Lei's hand.

Lei sighed in exasperation. "Come on, I'm not asking you anymore."

Bada yelped as she was quickly dragged away, her hands numb in the bitter cold. Lea's hands were soft and warm, the contrast almost too much to handle.

Nonetheless she followed the shorter girl

Bada was surprised when Lei took her to a studio, a home recording studio to be more precise.

She was left speechless at how big and well-equipped it was. She knew that Lei loved to sing, but she didn't know that she was this serious about it.

She touched the buttons of the monitor in awe, her awe quickly turning to excitement. "This is amazing, you make songs?"

"Yes" Lei nodded, motioning for Bada to sit. "And sometimes I sell them depends if I like the artist"

She just hoped that Bada would not notice the fake smile on her face. After all, what happened during her training days left her with so much trauma, but the love for music was something she could never lose.

Yes, she was scared to perform in front of other people, and for other reasons, which was why she initially began selling her songs. But she still wanted her songs to be heard, not by her though.

"You sell your songs?" Bada's eyes widened as she sat down next to Lei. She was filled with curiosity now. "What songs have you made? And who did you sell them to?"

"No" Lei replied, her tone turning playful

"Come on" Bada nudged her, pointing at the computer in front of them. "Show me" she repeated.

Lei laughed and gave in, turning towards her console to open up the files in front of them. Bada saw another folder with the name 'Lei's private songs' but didn't mention it

With one click a folder full with songs opened. Bada leaned in licking her lips as she stared at the screen. She knew most of these songs, but what surprised her they were all western artists songs, but one song caught her off guard

Bada turned to Lei quickly, her face filled with surprise. "Wait dude, you wrote 'Never Felt So Alone'?"

Lei turned towards her, looking at Bada's face before replying, her voice filled with a hint of nervousness.

"Yes" she said. "Did you like it"

"You listened to it?" Bai asked. Her voice sounded hopeful, as if waiting for a good response.

"Did you like it?"

"I had it on repeat when it came out," Bada admitted, making Lei smile.

"So you're the famous unknown girl who sings with him?" Bada wondered. "Why didn't Labyrinth give you credits?"

"I didn't want to" Lei replied. "I want to stay anonymous."

"Are you crazy?" Bada asked, she looked at Lei as if she grew two heads "Do you know how much people wanna know the girl who sings in that song?"

"I know but I don't care," Lei replied. "I like it like this."

Bada was quiet, and her gaze returned to the computer.

"I noticed you only wrote songs for Western artists" Bada said, as her eyes followed the words on the screen.

"You never wrote kpop songs before?"

"No" She said grabbing the burger she got along with the knife she took before coming upstairs "I only helped Chenle with a few songs but other than that nothing"

She cut the burger in half slowly and Bada only watched her. Something was weird but Bada didn't want to push it, in the end it's not her place

"But I like it like this" Lei said through her teeth. "I give it to them willingly."

"They give me money" she added with a shrug. "We both get something out of it."

Lei held out the half-burger, and Bada accepted. Her eyes remained fixed on the younger girl, as she took a bite from the burger.

"I'm sharing my burger with you – be grateful," Lei said with a smirk, pointing at her

Bada rolled her eyes, her expression turning playful as she let out a small thank you. She looked around the studio, the cozy environment and the familiar layout calming her somewhat.

The walls of the studio were covered in white paint, though the pink LED lights created a vibrant atmosphere that brought the room together. Some old vinyl records and colorful band posters hung on the walls, adding a hint of personality to the space.

In one corner, a cute black leather two-seater sofa sat beneath a small round armchair. Near the sofa there was a whiteboard hung on the wall. It had some polaroids of Lei and her friends taped to and a few written notes that Bada assumed were from her friends

The recording booth was an added bonus that made the studio even better. Although she didn't mind working in studios without a booth, it definitely improved the songs in the long run.

In another corner, there was a keyboard piano and two guitars on display.

"When Chenle debuted and got his first wage, he bought me that brown guitar" Lei said, catching Bada's fully attention

"I remember telling him to spend his money on things he needed, but he was so stubborn, he still is" Lei continued, both of them laughing.

She sighed at the memory of young Chenle giving her the guitar, a conflicting mix of happiness and sadness flowing through her.

It was a happy yet sad memory for her. He was so happy that day she vividly remembered him saying 'I made it because of you'

She never told anyone she cried a week because of that

"He's a really nice man" Bada said softly, tossing the wrapper in the trash.

"When Soojin first introduced him to us" she went on "I expected him to be awkward and nervous."

"But man was he hyped" she added with a grin.

Lei laughed in response, that sounds like her brother.

"Honestly, I don't know what goes through his mind." Lei grabbed a notebook and pen, opening the first pages to check if she wrote something on it.

Finding nothing, she turned towards the idol and handed it to her

"What's this?" Bada asked, raising an eyebrow and looking at the blue notebook. "You want an autograph"

Lei scoffed at the idea, shaking her head. "You wish."

Bada smirked back, turning towards the notebook. "Oh no need to deny it." She began writing something, then signing it. She tore the page and gave it to Lei.

"Yah, to my number one fan?" Lei exclaimed hitting her shoulder lightly "Im not your fan"

Bada's smirk never left her face, she was enjoying this "You act like one"

"I gave you this to write songs," Lei huffed, a tone of annoyance in her voice. "Can't even be nice these days."

"Wait." Bada dragged on her words slightly, before repeating what Lei had said in a tone of surprise.

"You gave me this to write songs?" she asked.

A look of confusion filled her face, and she slowly turned towards Lei. "Why?"

"I don't know, you can get inspired and write something," Lei said with a smirk, "you can always use my studio too, I don't mind."

Bada's face lit up with excitement. "Really?" she asked eagerly, her expression turning into a bright smile when the other gitl said yes. "Thank you"

She opened the notebook again and wrote down 'Bada's Lyrics Diary (Australia Version)' in big, bold letters. She began drawing some cute doodles to go along with the title, smiling to herself as the memories came flooding back.

Lei's jaw dropped as she saw that the oreo haired girl started writing already. "You're already writing this fast?" She asked in amazement.

"After all the shit that happened, I definitely had some inspiration" she said with a smile, not looking up

Lei chuckled, coming close to the older girl to see what she was writing. And for the first time in so long, Bada was happy and she had fun. She was quick to judge Lei, cut her some slack, everyone has bad first impressions of someone

Bada was grateful, truly. After two weeks of not being home, of being in a messy state, this would definitely help her feel better. She needed to get back into herself, and making music was definitely the tool to do that.

Today started bad, but it was ending good

And Bada could only thank the girl next to her

#talking with eli #bada lee #bada lee edit #bada lee imagine #bada lee fanfic #bada lee x reader #swf #bada lee x oc #gxg #lee bada x reader #bada lee imagines #bada lee x y/n #bada lee au #bada lee fanfiction #lee bada #lotdl smau #love on the down low smau

[anki-of-beleriand]

In the darkness you said goodbye

Summary: Wanda makes a mistake, and she thinks she can tlak herself out of it.

Warnings: Cheating, F/M sex, bittersweet ending, Wanda is to blame.

Pairing: Reader/Wanda - Reader/Carol - Wanda/Vision

Author's note: This story is an experiment, mostly I want to see how it goes as a one shot, and second just want to see how it goes with Wanda. I hope you guys liked it, as always English is not my mother tongue so forgive me my grammar, spelling and funny mistakes.

Second part: In the light you love her

 Winter was your favourite time of the year.

The snowflakes falling on the ground, and the sound of Christmas jingles around the streets was enough to put you on a good mood. It had been five years since Thanos was defeated it and the Blip was reversed changing the shape of the universe, the stories people told were now shaped for a past that defied everything they knew.

Midgard had certainly changed in the last years; new heroes were born and the old ones were ready to step aside and give way to the new generations. Your face lifted up to the Avengers Tower standing proudly in midtown Manhattan while the cold of the early afternoon surrounded you in a comforting embrace.

You smiled to yourself, music blasting through your ears while your hand closed around the small box you had worked your ass off to get for this special date. Your phone vibrated, the ringtone you attached to Natasha’s name breaking through the music and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the sudden interruption.

“Yes, mom?” The voice at the other end chuckled, and you allowed yourself a tender smile.

“I’m just making sure you’re okay, kiddo, no need to be a brat about it.”

“I am okay, more than okay, I’m super okay!”

“So, you’re nervous.” The older woman replied, and you gulped chewing on your lower lip.

“I am, I’m super nervous.” You confessed, the hand closing around the small box as you spoke. “Tasha, I love her, I…god when I lost her in the Blip, I almost lost myself to darkness…”

“I remember, Y/N, I know it was hard for you.” And Natasha remembered those dark times, you had always been an open gate to darkness.

The very nature of your species made it easier for your heart and soul to give into darkness, your powers were not only a manifestation of your mutation but also a warning sign of what you were capable of doing. But Natasha never gave up on you, and from the moment Thor brought you in and she took care of you, you became the woman Natasha knew you could be. Then, Thanos happened and Natasha could see for the very first-time what Thor and even Loki meant when they said that you were born out of pure blackness. You became unfeeling, careless, cold and almost cruel…

The moment you lost Wanda, on that battlefield watching her disappeared, that was the first time Natasha feared you.

You turned around destroying every single servant that Thanos had brought with him, your shadows covering Wakanda just before they perished in screams of pure agony. Darkness had covered you, and everything would have ended in disaster if Steve hadn’t knock you out; not many understood the deepness of your love for Wanda, but Natasha had been there to see the growing friendship, the affection and the tender moments stolen in between their teenage years.

Natasha had seen the relationship grow from afar, and she could tell you were far to in love with Wanda to not suffer with her lost. But even after you woke up, it wouldn’t be until everyone went looking for Thanos in space that you really broke.

Natasha still remembered when you crumbled to your feet after having destroyed an entire fleet of Chitahuri while looking for Thanos with Carol. How you cried until she put her arms around you, and you finally let go of the pain of losing the woman you loved with all your heart and might. You cried for days, and soon every surviving Avenger was afraid of losing you, of not being able to reach out to you. Natasha hated to see the suffering in your face, the whimpers leaving your lips as you tried to talk and explain that you were hurting so badly you didn’t know what to do.

It took time, but eventually you started recovering. Tony and Steve, as well as Carol and Rocket helped in the process. From them you learnt about your past, and your planet, they talked to you about your origins and your powers, and Natasha was happy to see you recover.

You became not only an Avenger, but also an amazing woman.

And now, after five years of having defeated Thanos and recovering the woman you had been in love since you were fifteen years old, it was just fair for you to have a happy ending.

“You have grown so much since I first met you, Y/N. Wanda is a lucky girl, you know?”

“Nah, I’m the lucky one, I just hope…I mean…” You stood by the gates of the Tower, trembling while cleaning up your sweaty hands. “We’ve been talking about having children and all, and I just… I don’t know if I’m a mom material but…”

“You are. You are, Y/N, now stop stalling and go get her, kiddo. I love you.” Natasha stated in that motherly tone you had come to love as well, you chuckled when you heard Yelena in the background and Natasha cursing in Russian.

“Okay, okay, don’t kill auntie Lena, and stop cursing. I call you when …. when I can.”

“Please have loud, sweaty sex with your soon to be fiancée, and call us when you finish!”

“Yelena!”

You chuckled shaking your head while hanging up.

The building was mostly empty, there was only one security guard that greet you with a polite smile and a mug of hot chocolate on his hands. You went past him into the elevators, your finger selecting the floor Tony had given to Wanda when he first finished the Avengers Tower.

You stood there hearing the music, your hands completely sweaty while your heart hammered hard against your chest. There was a deep void inside your stomach, and you couldn’t help but lifted your eyes to the numbers on the screen. You knew that day would be the day, today had been your last active day as a hero, and Tony had already hired you as normal everyday scientist in one of his investigational facilities. Wanda still thought you were in Kamar Taj with Strange and a girl that had shown to his doorstep, so tonight would be a great surprised that you hope would finally give you your happily ever after.

When Wanda came back, trying to build your relationship with her had been hard.

Wanda found it difficult to adapt herself to a life she was not used to, she found it hard to find out you had travelled around the galaxy being a hero with someone like Carol Danvers and Rocket. At first, you found it funny that Wanda was jealous of Carol, but then it was not only Carol but also your new house in Westview, or the bicycle you bought to go around the city. It was about your job at Stark’s Industries and your lack of interested in being a hero. Then it was you leaving your hero life behind and wanting to be normal, or to gather the new generation of heroes…

Your relationship with Wanda had been rocky, to say the last, after she came back.

But you had learnt that time and communication fixed everything, and after a while the both of you talked about what you really wanted. About your future, about your hopes…and you realized that Wanda wanted nothing more than a life with you. To build a family, and to be happy. She was finding it hard to do so, in a world that had moved on without her, and you made sure to let her know every day that your life had been nothing without her in it.

You smiled putting the ring from your pocket.

Now, finally you could close the last gap and asked Wanda to marry you. You had given up everything in your old life, to start your new life with Wanda.

“Okay, here we go…”

The door of the elevator open and you stepped inside the living room. The place was decorated with candles, and the sweet aroma of Wanda’s favourite perfume. You furrowed your brows, looking around the place you could see her back, and some of her things scattered around.

You walked down the halls, stopping dead on your tracks when your eyes fell upon something you did not recognize. It was a dark jacket. You looked around the scene, and then you caught the sounds. You felt dizzy, your body burning while your stomach dropped leaving a foul taste in your throat.

The hallway was dark, most of the doors were closed but the last one at the end of the hallway. Yellowish light came from it, and as you approached it you could tell it was the light coming from different candles. You were trembling, all of a sudden you felt cold and empty.

A heavy weight positioned above your shoulders, and your heart trembled at the sight before you.

Wanda was on the bed, sprawled and legs wide open with Vision on top of her. Both were naked, and Wanda was throwing her head back grabbing the bedsheets tightly, Vision was trusting inside her whispering in her ear.

Your eyesight blurred for a moment, but your presence went unnoticed and just as you came in, you left. You were staggering around the hallway until your knees gave up and you fell with a soft thud, tears rolling down your eyes and the ring you had made for Wanda fell to the floor.

A part of you, the darker part, ignited a fire inside you ready to scream and bring down the hole building with Wanda and Vision in it. You wanted to make them suffered, for them to experiment the sheer pain you were experimenting at the moment. But another part, the one you had gained with your family and friends simply told you to go.

And so, you did. Falling into the shadows you disappeared leaving behind the ring you had made to Wanda as promised to her, a commitment, and show of your love for her.

Later that same night, Wanda cringed shivering as she exited her room. She placed a hand on her face, shamed and self-disgust filling up her mind, just as she thought of the passion that Vision ignited in her. She knew she needed to put a stop to the affair with Vision; she knew that she had to do it soon if she really wanted to move forward with Y/N and actually started the family you two had talked about. But Wanda was afraid to do so, she was afraid of the consequences, of Vision not understanding, of anyone finding out…

Wanda was strolling down the hallway until her feet stepped on something hard on the floor. She furrowed her brows, and her expression soon changed as she realized it was a small box. At first she thought this was one of Vision’s attempts to get to her heart, but then Wanda felt her stomach dropped and her heart ached painfully in her chest.

Inside the box there was a ring.

And suddenly, Wanda realized how stupid she had been.

Wanda stood there, her eyes wide open filled with tears. She made her way to the door, but you were no longer there, the room was still dark and when she turned on the lights her gazed fell upon the dark box you had been carrying for almost five years.

“Wanda…” Vision said behind her, but Wanda couldn’t do or say anything at all, her eyes completely fixed on the ring you had brought to her.

It was a start.

A green start resembling a spiralling galaxy, the shank of the ring made of white gold.

Your name and hers written around it, the date you two said I love you to one another right beside them.

It was at moment that Wanda realized how stupid she had been.

_________________________________________

“You really have some nerve to come here, Wanda.” Natasha stood by the door glaring at the redhead, her arms crossed though she could sense Yelena getting her weapons ready.

“Natasha, I need to talk to her.” Wanda was on the verge of desperation.

For more than a month she had tried to reach out to you, to try and get to talk to you and explain herself. Wanda knew that whatever you had seen, whatever had happened, she would need to do more than explain what had happened. Why she did it. You were nowhere to be found, and everyone had closed their doors to Wanda who only got disgusted faces, and harsh words thrown at her.

She knew she was risking a lot by coming here, but it was her last chance.

“She doesn’t want to talk to you.” Natasha stated, her eyes glaring at Wanda. “Now, if you excuse me…”

“Natasha, please…” Wanda all but begged, she had tears in her eyes and it was quite evident she had not sleep in quite a while.

Natasha hesitated; she wondered if Wanda understood the gravity of her sin.

The former Black Widow almost went to the Tower to kill with her bare hands the red head. Y/N had come home, a scream of pure pain leaving her lips just as tears rolled down her cheeks. It took Natasha almost an hour to get Y/N to tell her what had happened, and she was so heartbroken she curled up on her bed and cried while holding a hand to her chest.

No one knew the reality of a broken heart.

How much it hurt, how it made your body cold and ached as if a thousand knives went through your every nerve. Y/N spent three days on her bed, ignoring everyone and everything around her. For a brief moment, Natasha had been afraid of the darkness growing in your eyes, day in and out seeing it covered your iris and expanding little by little.

“You broke her heart, Wanda.” Natasha stated through gritted teeth. “You broke her, and she loved you more than life itself. I can’t tell you just how much she loved you and how much you messed up…”

“I know! I know! I know!” Wanda screamed putting a hand on her face. “I know screwed up! I KNOW!”

Natasha seemed unfazed by the outburst, and Wanda broke in front of the former Widow pleading with her eyes.

“Please, I just need…”

“She is not here.” Natasha finally said.

“What?” Wanda winked confusedly; Natasha hesitated before speaking.

“She left two days ago.”

“Where? Why?” Wanda panicked, she glanced at Natasha then back at Yelena. “Where is she?”

“She left the planet; Loki came in and took her away.” This time around it was Yelena, the blond-haired woman smirked nastily at Wanda. “And we don’t know when she will be back, perhaps never, and if she is lucky, she may meet someone that won’t break her heart.”

Wanda stood there, lost and crushed by this news. Natasha hesitated for a moment, a part of her feeling this was not the best way to give the news. The woman stepped forward moving past Wanda.

“She is not coming back anytime soon, Wanda, so if I were you I would just let go.” Natasha turned to look at Wanda. “She waited for you, she almost lost herself for you, she was going to marry you…”

“I know! I just…god, this is so mess up!” Wanda wrapped her arms around herself. “I need to…I…I just…I need her…”

“You’re too late for that, Wanda.” Natasha then turned around and left.

Wanda stood there.

She was alone, lost and desperate, and without a single clue as to where you were or how to reach you out. Not a single way to talk to you, to explain to you…Wanda fell to her knees, her hand reaching out for the ring in her pocket. Tears rolling down her cheeks, and her mind a pool of confusing thoughts.

She would wait if it was necessary.

She knew that you were hurt, and she would wait for you to have a chance to explain herself to you.

And then, she would make sure to show you that Wanda was yours. That you held her heart in your hands.

It would be quite a while before she would see you again. But Wanda would wait, just the same way you did.

_________________________________________

Winter was back.

You lifted your eyes to the sky, closing your eyes while enjoying the feeling the cold on your face. Your ears twitched catching the sound of laughter inside the house, turning around you saw Kamala Khan squealing like a fangirl while hugging Carol tightly. You smirked at the sight, Carol was still getting used to such shows ow affection and Kamala was certainly someone without any limitations in her PDA.

“Y/N!! Oh, did you hear?? I will help you guys move!!!” Kamala went back inside her house screaming at the top of her lungs, “AMMI!”

“Move?” You asked raising a single eyebrow, Carol winced making her way to where you were standing.

“Well, I was thinking that perhaps I shouldn’t be moving around so much, and that staying on Earth is not such a bad thing, after all.” Carol shrugged looking away from you, her lip caught in her teeth with her mind filled with thoughts and possibilities.

Overthinking her every step as always.

“I think Monica is going to love it, Kamala is screaming her appreciation…”

“And you?” Carol asked this time around facing you with just a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. “You’re back again, what would you do?”

You had been away for two years, while you never stopped contacting Natasha and the others you had left earth with a single thing in mind. To heal. Your heart had been broken to pieces the moment you found about Wanda’s infidelity, you had cried and cursed and almost turned to darkness until you found yourself at the hands of Carol Danvers. For the second time, the woman took it upon herself to help you out, out of friendship she never thought she would get a chance with you; not after having heard of your story with Wanda and certainly not after she was back. Her odds didn’t improve one bit when she saw how heartbroken you were, Carol knew by then you needed a friend and that was what she offered you.

A friendship that, little by little turned into something else.

Still, there were times in which Carol doubt herself and the relationship she had forged with you.

You softened your featured, your arm wrapping around her waist putting her closer to you. She leaned in, nuzzling your neck before placing a soft kiss on your jaw looking for comfort. You smiled lowering your face until your lips met hers, the kiss was slow and sweet, and Carol smiled into the kiss.

“So, that’s an idea of what you want to do?”

“Ugh, gross.” Monica made a face while Kamala was looking at the scene with a glint of curiosity in her eyes.

“Okay, ladies, nothing to see here.” Carol tried to shush them away, but you wrapped your arms around her again, you turned her around and kissed her once more making Monica gaged and Kamala giggled nervously.

“Let’s give them a show, Danvers.” You mumbled in between kisses; she punched you lightly on the arm flustered stepping away from you before she decided to just follow your lead.

“Very well, I think it is time for me to go back to work but…” Monica turned to Carol wrapping her arms around her. “Please, Auntie Carol, tell me when you get there and don’t forget to keep an eye on the plane.”

“I won’t Captain trouble.” Carol said affectionately, Monica smiled sighing as she stepped back.

“Don’t be a stranger, Rambeau.” You gave her a hug, and the other woman glanced at you then back at Carol.

“You’re one to say, Natasha Romanoff is still waiting for you and you heard Fury…”

You winced fidgeting on your spot, you had heard Fury and Natasha was also waiting for you. You nodded scratching the back of your neck.

“I guess is inevitable.” You shrugged. “I will tell you all the gross details of these meetings.”

“I will wait for them anxiously, take care of Auntie Carol please.”

“I will, don’t worry.” You winked at Monica and stepped back to join Kamala and Carol inside the Khan’s family.

“Hey, are you okay?” Carol fixed your hair behind your ears, you nodded curtly pecking her nose.

“Yeah, let’s eat and then I will take you home, Captain Marvel.”

Earth had changed in the last two years she had been here.

The street were loudly, and the technology had certainly improved a lot. The stories were different now, most of them included the newest heroes in the cities, and the evilness lurking in the shadows.  You enjoyed the soft purr of the bike you had bought in Jersey City, Carol had her arm wrapped around your abdomen leaning against your body while you drove down the streets of a city you had not seen in a long time.

Up until now, you had spent your time in the guest room at the Khan’s family home. You had tried to say no, but Ms. Khan was very adamant that they would not stay in a hotel or something equally dangerous. And Kamala was beyond excited to have them both in her home, at least until all the moving details had been arranged and soon they would be driving down to Luisiana.

To say you were nervous was an understatement, it didn’t mater you had spoken with Natasha almost every day since leaving earth. Or that you had been kept up to date with the gossip around the Avengers and the newest additions thanks to Yelena, it was the fact that this little party would include Wanda as a guest. Two years ago, you had left your home running away from your feelings, your heart had been broken and you never thought it would mend. And while it took some time to get it back together, to actually allow yourself to feel and fall in love again.

You had done so.

Carol had become your world, but this time around you were careful to not lost yourself into the relationship. Carol was not an easy person, and while the road to happiness had been a bumpy one, you wouldn’t change a single thing of how everything happened. Not if it meant that at the end of the day she would wake up with you beside her, a mug filled with coffee and a morning of meaningless talks watching the space in the window of a ship.

“Wow, I don’t remember this building being here on my last visit.” Carol stated getting off the motorcycle, she glanced up to the building then turning to you.

“I bet Tony made some arrangements.” You smiled turning to the main gates, your hand seeking out hers.

“Are you ready?” Carol inquired tilting her head, you nodded curtly and then without wasting any more time, you two entered the building.

There were many familiar faces, but soon you found yourself being wrapped in a tight hug by none other than Natasha. You softened your face and your arms wrapped around her pulling her close to you, Carol watched from a distance, her lisp curling into a gentle smile before she turned around and left for the bar. These moments were for you, and you had been waiting to come back and see the people you love, Carol could understand that much. With a heavy heart, and insecurities filling up her mind, the woman made her way to the bar never noticing the redhead glaring daggers at her back.

“You look so good, Y/N, did you cut your hair?” Natasha put you at arm’s length, her eyes twinkling while the examine you with care.

“Yeah, a little and well I have to be on top physical form to be in space, so…” You smiled sheepishly, Natasha chuckled placing a strand of hair behind your ear.

“How have you been?” Natasha finally asked and you just shrugged.

“Fine, I guess. I just come here due to a mishap of  powers between Carol, Monica and a girl called Kamala.”

“So I heard, quite the adventure I guess.” Natasha then hit you on your arm.

“Hey!”

“So if it hadn’t been because of that you wouldn’t have come?” Natasha was a little hurt by this, you shook your head lowering your gaze before shrugging.

“No, of course not. I did have plans…” You stated and Natasha was about to speak but trailed off just as her eyes caught another person coming towards them. “I knew I have to come back, and I was dying to see you all, I was just… waiting…”

“You were waiting for what?” Wanda asked behind you, and she wait anxiously for you to turn around.

You thought the moment you heard her voice again, that you saw her again your resolution would crumble and that perhaps you would fall under her spell once more. One of your greatest gears included your weakness to perhaps leave behind your relationship with Wanda and moved forward. But this never happened, and soon after you started healing it was easier to move on. Now, after two years, you stood before her and you realized you had been scared for nothing.

Of course, your stomach dropped, your palms started sweating and your head fluttered in your chest when you saw her again. She was still as beautiful as you remembered her, her voice still carried with it such a powerful tinge, something you had always loved from her.

But something else had changed, the shivering in your heat came along with an old pain and rage that went through your senses. You clenched your fists closed, but remained impassive while Wanda offered a tentative smile.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Wanda chewed on her lower lip before speaking, “do you think we could talk?”

You glanced out of the corner of your eyes to see Natasha standing closed to you, Yelena had stopped talking with a brunette in a dark suit, and both of them were walking towards you. You then lifted your eyes and soon you found the eyes of Carol looking at you with curiosity, after a moment the other woman smiled and nodded in understanding.

“I think we need to talk, Wanda, lead the way.”

Two years ago, on a day such as this, you discovered the pain behind a betrayal.

You glanced at the sky, the snowflakes falling slowly down the streets, the breeze caressing your warm cheeks while you waited patiently for Wanda to speak. The other woman had changed as well, she looked thinner, and tired, her hair was longer and she seemed quiet and alone. Wanda turned her stare to you and you could see their love and regret and loneliness.

“Why didn’t you stay?” She asked, her voice breaking by the end of the question.

You raised a single eyebrow snorting while shaking your head.

“You really asking that?”

“The ring…You were there…” Wanda started and you winced remembering that day, the old pain coming back as you remembered how it felt.

“I could have killed you and Vision.” You stated looking away from her. “I was so mad, so heartbroken, Wanda…I knew if I had stayed or said something…well, it would have ended in a bloodbath.”

Wanda winced wrapping her arms around herself, “I just…god, I’m sorry. I just…I’m so sorry for everything, I never…”

“What, Wanda? You never what?” You asked harshly, Wanda stepped back lowering her face.

“I was afraid, and I wasn’t sure of what I wanted, okay? I came back and you were already all over me, and I really didn’t know what you were expecting of me, and he was just there listening to me and…”

“And I didn’t? Wanda I asked you, everyday I tried to make our communication to work!” You huffed rolling your eyes at the excuses. “What were you hoping for, Wanda? A child? A dick? What?”

Wanda had thought about it in the last two years, she thought about her reason and why she had entered into a senseless affair with Vision. The truth was she didn’t know exactly why, she always thought that you had everything resolved by the time she came back, you had five years to organise your life and made decision for the future whereas Wanda had been trapped in nothingness until she came back to face a world she didn’t recognize. Vision had been the only one who understood, the only one who let her talk and expressed the way she wanted to about the situation, and in the midst of those conversations Wanda fell into passion and desire to make her life and indecision more bearable.

“I was just hoping everything went back to normal, and that…I didn’t feel so lost.” Wanda mumbled knowing her words meant nothing to you at the moment.

You sighed shaking your head, “I guess it doesn’t matter now.”

“Y/N, I just…I…search for you.” Wanda mumbled, you nod curtly at her.

“I know.”

“I want to explain, to tell you that it meant thing.” Wanda stated lowly. “I wanted to tell you that I Lov…”

“Don’t.” You cut her off before she could continue. “Don’t say it, you don’t have any right to say to me anymore, Wanda.”

Wanda stepped forward, holding back her tears she made sure her eyes were locked with yours, her heart beating fast and her whole-body trembling.

“I love you.” Wanda said softly. “I’m still in love with you, and I just…”

“Can you hear yourself, Wanda? If you love me you wouldn’t have done…you would have come to me first! We would have talked about this, about us!” You exclaimed waving your arms around. “You wouldn’t have cheating on me just because you felt alone or misunderstood.”

“Y/N…” Wanda started but she cut off as soon as someone entered the balcony you two were in.

“Hey, baby, are you…Oh, sorry, I’ll be inside if you…” Carol interrupted glancing at you then at Wanda, before turning around and leaving.

Wanda clenched her jaw, turning to you eyes that flickered between red and green.

“So, you left two years and you have replaced me already?” Wanda asked bitterly, you snorted shaking your head.

“Nobody can replace you, Wanda. You will always be my first love.” You stated softly, your heart fluttering at the veracity of your words.

Wanda clenched her eyes close, you closed the distance between you and her standing right in front of her. Your eyes drifting for a moment to see the ring you wanted to give her on her left hand.

“Wanda I loved you with my whole heart, I thought you and I will be forever but after I saw you with Vision, I couldn’t take it.” You mumbled placing a hand on hers, Wanda shivered and she knew there was a finality in your tone.

When she imagined this meeting the outcome was different inside her head. She always thought you would come wanting to go back but not without some kind of request or penance so everything could back to normal. She never imagined the outcome of this would be for Wanda to experience the same broken heart you had experience two years ago.

“I didn’t want this to happen.” Wanda mumbled wrapping her arms around herself, you pressed you lips together stepping back a little. “I thought we…”

“Me too.” You replied.

Wanda was about to take the ring away, but you stopped her offering a bittersweet smile to her.

“I made it for you, so…it’s yours, Wanda.”

The other woman broke into a half smile, but she was looking just miserable, she caressed the ring and the tears fell down slowly.

“Are you…are you happy?” She finally asked, you scowled at that question.

“Are you?”

Wanda sighed looking away before nodding, “yeah, yeah I am.”

You pressed your lips together, lowering your eyes before looking at her.

“That’s good.”

The lie rolled out of her lips easily, and while it was quite evident you knew Wanda was lying neither one of you was about to say anything at all. Wanda put her arms around herself, she wanted to say something else, perhaps asked how long passed after you left for you to get together with Carol, or how exactly did you two ended up being a thing. But Wanda knew that wouldn’t help at all, if anything would make her bitter.

“I guess…you better go back, I…Carol must be waiting for you.” Wanda turned her back to you, her eyes to the city.

You stood behind her, your hand lifting to reach out to her.

For a brief moment, it seemed as if you were to look for her, perhaps to talk or say something, anything that might change your situation and hers. You thought the moment you went back to her, that perhaps the old flame would ignite and that you and Wanda could offer one another a second chance. You were afraid that perhaps what you felt for Carol was just…revenged, and just a sense to fill up a void left by the broken heart.

But it wasn’t like that.

And while a part of you would always love Wanda, she wasn’t the person you were in love with.

Carol was playing with her drink on corner far away from everyone else, she was looking gloomy while pursing her lips. You softened lightly, strolling directly towards her.

“Hey, Marv, why are you pouting?” You chuckled when she lifted her face towards you, her eyes going wide before she tried to play it off.

“I’m no pouting.”

“You certainly look like someone who is pouting.” You chuckled leaning in to peck her cheek.

“I’m no pouting, and what are you doing here? I thought you were still talking to Wanda…” Carol looked away trying to conceal her emotion, she didn’t want to look jealous or insecure, she was supposed to be stronger than this.

You leaned in wrapping your arms around her waist, “mm, I was but now I’m not and I think I want to go home, so…shall we leave?”

Carol narrowed her eyes at you, it took her a moment before she placed a hand on your cheek.

“Are you okay?” She asked, tilting your head slightly.

“I am.” You replied smiling softly.

“Did you two…clear things up?” Carol didn’t want to look eager, nor did she want to sound desperate. But she had always known the conversation with Wanda was something you needed to do.

It was a chapter of your life that was waiting to be closed.

“I did, we did.” You hesitated before continuing. “I realized that a part of me would always love Wanda, she was my first love.”

Carol nodded in understanding, her mind soon brought Maria to memory, and she could relate to what you were saying. She was observing you with care, your eyes gleaming lightly as they locked yours, and Carol felt her heart skipped a beat at the softness and love she found there.

“Then, I realized that you are the love of my life, Carol.” You said it so simply Carol felt her abdomen and her heart flutter, making her body tingle at the revelation. “I am in love you with you, and I can’t imagine anybody else I want to be with but you.”

You had heard before how many people stated Carol Danvers was a flat, unfeeling individual, that she was just too unemotional, and quite incapable of expressing emotion. You had discovered this was far from the truth, Carol was someone who felt too much and suffered in silence; she was just selective with the people she allowed in her life.

“I love you to, Y/N.” She mumbled just before closing the distance and kissing you softly.

“Mhm, I think we better go.” You said smiling goofily at her, “wait until we tell Kamala where we were.”

“Oh, no please, she is going to start arguing with us because we didn’t bring her over.”

“Don’t worry, I have it covered, I ask everyone for their signature.” You replied showing a small notebook you had stolen from Kamala’s room. “I think with this we are forgiven.”

“My hero.” Carol stated rolling her eyes, you winked at her before grabbing her hand and dragging her around the room to say goodbye.

Wanda watched from a distance as you and Carol said goodbye, your face never lost the brightness brough by your smile and your hand never left that of Carol who was following you with tenderness and love all around the room. The young witch knew she had messed up her chances with you, she knew the moment she saw you entered the Avenger’s Tower that what would happen that day would be a final conversation more than anything. Wanda felt her heart break to pieces, her eyes filling up with tears as she finally realized she was alone.

She had tried to cover her mistakes, and her emotions with a meaningless night of passion that had costed her happiness.

Now, as you entered the lift with a laughing Carol by your side, she realized that you had said goodbye to her a long time ago.

That day Wanda had broken your heart while hidden in the shadows.

#personal #fanfic #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wandaxreader #female reader

[keys-hellscape-1020]

Cod Boys as Animals

A/N: I thought this would be a fun writing exercise and I’m a monster fucker so bonus points. I’m very willing to write more on this idea.

Contents: Canon typical violence, talk of torture but not shown, talk of stalking very lightly shown, talk of murder very lightly shown

————

Ghost- Black Panther

Known for their ability to stay hidden from view and blend in with the shadows, Ghost fits in with these black beauties perfectly. Panthers do not chase their prey. Instead they choose to stalk them slowly. When their prey looks back at them they stop moving, blending in with the shadows. You will not know that Ghost is stalking you until his jaws are around your throat and your blood is staining his teeth.

Sometimes he draws the hunt out, teases you with his presence. A clawed hand curled around a doorframe in the dark of night that disappears when you blink. A silhouette out your window when you’re trying to sleep. Ghost lives off the sweet smell of your fear and he will milk as much of it from you as he can get. And when the fear runs dry? You’ve served your purpose, and the hunt is over.

Soap- Spotted Hyena

Spotted Hyenas are pack hunters and Soap is only one man, yet that does not make him any less deadly. A persistence hunter, he is not afraid to drive headfirst into a herd of his enemies, explosives and gunshots going off to force them to scatter. Once they’ve scattered his choice of prey will not be able to escape, he will follow them through thick and thin, desert and sea. He will keep hunting them, making his presence known, he will not let them rest. Once he finally catches his prey, it’s a blood bath, with little left to identify the body after.

An extremely smart individual, Soap will find and exploit all your flaws. Your pride, envy, everything and anything will be used to draw you into a weak position. Soap knows everything that’s wrong with you, and he plans on making it so much worse. Don’t worry however, he’ll make everything all better. Before he leaves you alone once and for all.

Gaz- Peregrine Falcon

The Peregrine Falcon has many strategies it employs to achieve it’s hunts. It’s preferred techniques however are rapid dives, fast-paced pursuits, and other impressive maneuvers. While Gaz does tend to prefer quick, practical hunts, he can’t deny that when he knows he’s good at something he’s just needs to show it off a little bit. He won’t drag anything on nearly as long as Ghost or Soap, but he can’t help playing with his food on occasion.

When he’s not sniping his enemies from afar in one clean shot, he can be found in close quarters with his enemy. He’ll be right on top of them, twirling around and around while he watches them be oh so clueless to his true intentions. He doesn’t have the sadism of Ghost of the bloodthirstiness of Soap, he simply wants to see the shock in their eyes as the person who was wining and dining them all night sinks a knife into their chest. He has the pretty face and the charisma to pull such stunts off, so why not put them to good use on occasion?

Price- Nile Crocodile

A large, fearsome beast, that simply waits for it’s prey to come to it. It does not bother with the hunt, it has no need to. Patience will be rewarded. That is also Price’s motto. He can’t get the enemy today? He will in a month or two. Everything is a matter of time, and Price has plenty to spare. He has dedicated his entire life to hunting down those who deserve it, no need to try and rush when he has years ahead of him.

Best hope this man does not set his eyes on you. You can struggle, thrash, bite, claw, whatever you like really. He’ll let you go without a fight because he knows that in the end you will always come desperately crawling back to him, try as you might to avoid it.

König- Komodo Dragon

A fierce predator with absolutely no sense of calm, Komodo Dragons are capable of killing prey twice their size. They are the largest living lizard on earth, and while they mainly hunt by ambush they are also excellent swimmers and fast runners, leaving no chance of escape for their unfortunate victims. König is similar in that he is larger than almost anyone he meets on the battle field, and he has the strength and speed to show for it.

Truly he is comparable to a force of nature, as even though he does not share the Komodo’s poison bite, the wounds he inflicts on his prey are certain to kill them sooner rather than later. Although it is certainly preferable to die quickly, as living with the wounds you are certain to sustain from this man would be a fate you would not wish on your worse enemy.

Alejandro- Grey Wolf

Grey Wolves are a pack animal, they work together to bring down animals much bigger than themselves. Alejandro is nothing without his pack, he needs them like he needs water. He would not be what he is without them, but they would not be what they are without him either, without their leader. Alejandro however is not an “alpha”, he listens to his team, coordinates them, makes them the dangerous force they are. Make no mistake however, Alejandro is still vicious by himself. He can and will kill and maul and eviscerate anyone who gets in his way without a second thought. He does not make the smartest choices when it is only himself at stake, but he will always make the best possible choices for his team. They are his everything.

You best hope you’re not in his sights, the best case scenario for you would be the entirety of Los Vaqueros coming for you instead of just Alejandro. If a Vaquero finds you the outcome will likely be kinder, a simple shot to the head or other vital organ. If Alejandro finds you and none of his men are at stake, you will be begging for the pits of hell.

Rudy- Black Mamba

Black Mamba’s only use their most lethal weapon, their venom, out of necessity. This tends to be when they are hunting, as they are very shy creatures and they try to stay away from conflict as much as necessary. While this is not necessarily true for Rudy, he dives headfirst into danger when needed, he is not a hunter. He does not stalk, torture, or anything of the like as often as most of the other boys. However this does not mean that he doesn’t do it.

Rudy is a force of nature, one that only comes out when the people he cares for are at risk. He prefers to only do what is necessary, not to go overboard. However when the people he cares about are in danger, torturing someone until they cannot even remember their own name is absolutely necessary. One that he will do with pleasure. No sin is to heavy for Rudy when his loved ones are on the line.

#key writing #this was so fun #it kinda transformed from what I originally intended but eh whatever #I still enjoyed it #modern warfare x reader #call of duty modern warfare #mw2 x reader #mwii #mwii ghost #ghost x reader #soap x reader #gaz x reader #price x reader #könig x reader #rudy x reader #alejandro x reader #cod x reader

[sarcastic-kai]

Yandere! L headcannons

Forgive me for this but I’m down BAD for this man so this is entirely self indulgent

Type: headcannons

Genre: yandere 

Warnings: yandere themes and NSFW themes ahead! Read at your discretion.

L happened to meet you at some point somewhere. While you didn’t even notice him, your presence simply captivated him. He was hooked on you the moment he saw you. There was something about you that just… made his stomach flutter and his heartbeat fast. 

He eventually decides that he can’t let you disappear. After all, you’re a sort of challenge. Someone he’s never met before is making him feel something he’s never felt before— and he wants to know why.

L is the kind of yandere that watches you from afar for a while, trying to figure out what he feels towards you and how to handle his feelings.

Once he has accepted his attachment to you, there is no stopping him. Of course, he knows that the situation calls for caution and patience. Although that agonizes him, he would rather learn about you from the shadows than pounce on you and scare you away for good.

Once his plan is in place, L easily tracks you down within a day. He memorizes your place of residence, where you work, and What your day-to-day schedule is like.

He has cameras and wire taps placed in your house, allowing him to watch you from the privacy of his room. 

And does he ever take advantage of that. He watches with great interest as you shower, dress, undress, and do certain activities to… unwind. 

On those occasions, he sits still, eyes never leaving your form, only flicking from camera feed to camera feed when he wants to see another angle. It’s no secret he is aroused, yet he never pleasures himself. Instead, he only watches, adamant about not soothing the need in his abdomen until you are able to do it for him. 

In time, the detective gathers the courage to follow you around for a little bit, occasionally appearing at certain places you frequent, always exchanging a look of recognition if your eyes happen to meet.

Eventually, the time comes when he can no longer wait to have you. And while he would love to strike up a friendship and let it lead into something more, he knows that it’s just not within his capabilities. After all, if he brings you into his world, he must be sure you do not leave. For his safety, and yours. And how can he be sure your tongue doesn’t loosen about his identity unless he is able to watch you 24/7? In his eyes, there is no other way to guarantee both his safety and yours. After all, If someone were to discover who he was and who you are to him, they could easily use you as leverage against the great detective, and he just can’t allow that.

So he takes you. He breaks into your house and sits for hours, waiting for you to return. And when you do, he has his chloroform soaked rag in his hand. 

He keeps you in his headquarters, in his bedroom. You are not permitted to leave the room or the floor, and he has watari bring you your meals and anything else you request (within reason of course).

He hides you from the task force, which is actually relatively easy for him. His private quarters have security measures to keep other people out, and you inside.

For the next few weeks you’re all over the news, your disappearance shocking to the people of your region. After all, it looks as if you suddenly up and vanished. However, the media excitement doesn’t deter L from his goal of having you to himself. He knows that in time the media will forget about you and the world will carry on as usual. 

At night, when he isn’t up working, he spends time with you. He talks to you—even if you don’t talk back.

If you ask him why he’s doing this to you, his only response is, “I saw no other logical way. In time you’ll come to see that.”

He provides you with anything and everything you could possibly want, slowly conditioning you to see him as less of a captor and more of a… provider. 

And although you hate to admit it, the handsome insomniac has grown in you in the three months you’d been confined. 

He respects your space, giving you your own room on his floor in which to stay. However, in exchange for the room you have to wear a metal bracelet specifically designed to monitor your whereabouts and your health and activities.

L does everything he can think of to whittle down your thoughts of escaping. He wants you to want him back, after all. 

So he respects your space, engages in casual conversation, and doesn’t harm you in any way. 

And when your whines for your family and friends get to his head, he reminds himself—and you— that this is what is best for the both of you. 

L knows it’s entirely selfish, but he doesn’t care. After all, he reasons, as long as he doesn’t hurt you what’s the harm of keeping you safe and fed and loved? That’s all you need, isn’t it? 

#kai writes #L lawliet #L #yandere #yandere L #yandere L lawliet #Death note #death note headcannons #L lawliet headcannons #Yandere smut #yandere headcannons #yandere death note

[misterradio]

having a crack at translating this letter in french from house of leaves 👍

translating poetry is hard cuz i want to be as literal as possible so that poem is kind of... not great... but i think everything else is fine.

The Leaf*

[* Feuille also means a sheet of paper]

My harsh formal dreams will know to overlap you My destiny on its golden chariot will be your good rock Who will hold your reins tight in your frenzy My verses, the paragons of all poetry - [Le Cheval / The Horse by Guillaume] Apollinaire

It was autumn. It was autumn and it was the season of war. Do you remember war? Me, less and less. But I remember autumn. I still see the wild flowers* next to the house, and, over there, the birch trees silent in the twilight. The leaves would fall during September. They would brown and evoke within me the spirit of my youth, and also the spirit of time.

[* Brouillard is the word for fog but also the baby's breath flower. the phrase "sur les prés" i think means something of the fields, ie. wildflowers? But the double meaning is relevant.]

Often I would go into the woods. I'd walk the fields and lose myself for a long time under the branches, in the shadows, among the leaves. Once, before entering the woods, I remembered that there was a black horse who would watch me from afar. He was at the far end of the little field. I would imagine he was watching me, but he was probably sleeping. Why was I thinking of that horse now? I don't know. Maybe for the same reason I'm thinking of all these words I've written just now.

I watched the sheet where I've noted everything that's come to my mind. At the time, I believed they were mine, but now I know I was wrong. Every time I reread them, I see that I was only copying that which I was told.

-- Don't be afraid. I won't stop. I have to discover this clearing. And I won't stop until I've found it. Do you know who can push me through this search? Well... no one. My wife is dead. My wife, my daughter and my son are all dead. Do you remember how they died? Me, less and less. I only remember the time. My wounds aren't mortal, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid of never finding this clearing.

I rest sometimes and watch the shadows, the leaves and the branches. Then, when I left the woods, I would see nothing but the fog around me. I couldn't see my house, nor the fields, only the fog. And of course, the black horse has disappeared.

-- [illegible]

#😎 hope you enjoy. #original nonsense #house of leaves #fortis arbor translates #<- sure. new tag for my attempts

[ignite-stars]

haunted, azriel

summary, you fear what you do not know.

author’s note, reader is morrigan’s younger sister for angst purposes. angst but pining angst. based off hoax by taylor swift.

His gaze had never felt so heavy. Pretty hues of gold simmered in his deep hazel stare, eyes glazed over with an unreadable look as he stared down at you.

With a thick gulp, the lump in your throat settled. You held his gaze with just as much defiance, refusing to play the familiar game of cat and mouse.

Some part of you felt empty. You had wanted him to look at you for so long, and now that his full attention was devoted to you, you felt. . . unsatisfied.

Because you knew that when the moon fell and the stars disappeared— the sun rising at the beginning of a new day, Azriel would be gone.

You’d have to watch him fall for your sister from afar. You’d scramble to scrounge up the shards of your broken heart as he smiled at Mor’s contagious laugh with such a tenderness in his gaze that you knew would never be directed towards you.

All you wanted was his love.

And Azriel would give you the constellations, the world beyond, and just about anything and everything you’d ask for.

But not his heart, never his heart.

Perhaps he was scared.

Scared that you would not ignore his love as your sister did. Azriel craved that sort of rejection. He had convinced himself he needed it to survive, just as much as the air in his lungs.

From the corner of your eye, the undead fell from the horizon. Starlight glittered in the night sky, landing along your cheeks and the bridge of your nose.

Starfall was your favorite night of the entire year. And usually you’d be spending it with your family, drinking the sweetest wine and exchanging memories of all your fallen loved ones.

But you had found yourself wanting a better view of the full moon, her loneliness far too familiar. You wandered out onto the balcony, leaning over the edge to bask in the cool air.

Your hair had been twisted up into a crown, small jewels and diamonds braided into your hair. And your gown was simple, a midnight-colored trumpet dress that hugged your body in all the right places.

Azriel appreciated all of you as his thumb came up to swipe at the fallen starlight along your bottom lip. Those damn eyes were lined with silver, giving you a false sense of hope.

“Hi,” you croaked out, your lips brushing against his scarred thumb. The small touch caused rose-colored glasses to cloud your vision.

Azriel’s lips twitched upwards, a playful grin pulling at his pretty lips. “Hi,” he whispered back. And you had half a mind to ask him why he had followed you out onto the balcony. But you couldn’t find it in yourself to care when he was so close.

The small heavenly part of your conscious screamed at you to push him away— to wound him in return for all the bruises your heart had taken, continued to take.

But you had never claimed to be a good woman, and you certainly loved the taste of temptation. You’d let him take all of you, you were sure of it. He had taken your heart. . . And you had let him.

“What are you thinking about, love?” His hand rested against the side of your face. You felt sick.

You didn’t deserve this, you knew that.

But maybe you too, were scared. Scared to find someone who could love you prettily.

Azriel stared down at you, patiently waiting for an answer to fall from your lips. With a heavy sigh, you forced a gentle smile. “Nothing— nothing important.”

Your love for Azriel was ugly and painful. Not like the sharp thorns of a dead rose— but more like poison ivy. The closer you let him get— the more accustomed you grew to his secret touches— the tighter the thick vines constricted around your heart. Slowly suffocating you into a cruel death.

Azriel tugged at your hand, pulling you back towards the balcony doors. “I think I’d like to show you the skies tonight, from above.” His shadows whipped around excitedly, some pushing at the heels of your feet as you walked, rushing you.

You followed him blindly, as you always did. As you always would. Any protests you had died on your tongue as you watched his face light up at the prospect of flying with you amongst the stars. “I’d like that,” you nimbly agreed.

Azriel’s grin only widened as he leaned in, placing a quick kiss to your forehead. As if he could see the poisonous ivy leaves crawling up your throat, holding your heart hostage.

Your eyes fluttered shut.

His love was certainly going to kill you.

But you didn’t mind a slow death.

#acotar #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel #i love writing angst omg chewing my fingers

[bimsha]

Dancing Without Music

Pairing : Xiao x Fem!Reader

Note: This is my first time writing for Genshin, I'm sorry if there are mistakes!

Tags: @cy-inky

Xiao had visited the Liyue harbour more often than he wanted after his encounter with Traveller. Especially on silent nights when the city was fast asleep and the only sound was the rush of water crashing against the patch of sand. He didn’t think of anything as he started walking across quiet streets that day. It was routine, a habit. He walked past houses with crimson lamps lighting their porches, throwing shadows across the street. Only when he finally reached his usual spot in the harbour did he realise that he was not alone. He watched, standing from afar, an annoyance tingling the edge of his mind. A girl stood in the harbour, overlooking the dark valley of water in front of her. Her body swayed from one side to the other as she hummed to herself. Her rich hair cascading her back in lock curled locks.  

Xiao decided not to bother her. He could sacrifice one night to this happy stranger dancing in the docks of Liyue to her own hum of music. When he came along the next day, she was still there, this time, her legs moved along with her body. She twirled, performing to a silent, invisible audience. The adeptus didn’t know when his routined harbour watches became watching a strange girl dancing the night away. But he did come to watch despite himself. His curiosity got the best of him as he watched her move across the wooden planks. She often stopped when a Ship docked into the harbour. Xiao watched her frame disappearing whenever someone meddled with her peace. 

He didn’t know how long it went on, but as he watched her from his spot on one of the narrow roofed buildings near the harbour, he wondered if he was ever going to talk to her. Humans found him intimidating, he wasn’t much interested in anything either. His responsibility was to protect Liyue, but the way she gracefully moved sparked some longing in his heart. But day by day, he let go of the feeling. The quicker the longing affected him, the quicker he left. Until one day when he reached the harbour, the girl wasn’t there. Just the still darkness of the water. He looked around, perplexed when an unfamiliar voice caught his ears. 

“You’re the one who’s been staring, aren’t you?”

Xiao turned. The familiar stranger was standing in front of him, a smile playing upon her lips. How peculiar, he thought. He had watched her dancing on her own for so long it was almost as if he knew her. “I’m sorry if I have made you uncomfortable. It was not my intention. If you’ll excuse me-” 

“Wait.” She stopped him. “I didn’t say it was uncomfortable.”

Xiao frowned, confused. Then what was it- “Who are you?” She asked, frowning. “I haven’t seen you around the tavern. Nor by the vendors.”

“I-” He started, about to reveal his true nature. A small part of him hesitated. “I am but a wanderer of the night,” he said, gesturing at the harbour. “I used to come here for relaxation.”

“Until I occupied your space?”

Xiao wasn’t sure how he was going to answer the question. But she didn’t seem to mind. “Well, if you don’t mind my presence, you’re more than welcome to join me!” Her voice was pleasant, and kind. 

Xiao reluctantly agreed. After his interactions with Traveller, he had slightly let his guard down around humans. But still he wasn’t completely comfortable with interacting with them. It felt wrong. He was tainted and at risk of letting everything around him consume in darkness. But her energetic, welcoming smile drew him to the harbour. It had been a while since he had stood there, just watching the vast waters. 

“Calming, isn’t it?”

Xiao glanced at her, “Yes.”

“Are you from around here?”

She shrugged, “I travel. But Liyue is my favourite place to visit. It’s like home, you could say.”

“Is that why you…” He asked, gesturing. “You dance around here at night?” He was not well-versed in the art of human behaviour. Maybe this was something they did? Though he did find it very strange because he hadn't seen much of this strange ritual. 

The girl laughed, “No! That’s not something everyone does. My mother used to be a famous dancer before she passed. Sometimes, when I trace her steps I feel like I can feel close to her.” She turned to him with a smile, “Do you want to try?”

Xiao stared at her blankly. Was she asking her for a dance? “I don’t-” He started when she interrupted. 

“People learn by trying. If you want to-” She offered her hand to him. He looked at her fingers, expectant eyes. Something in him kindled at the thought, he carefully laced his fingers through hers. Warm against his skin. Something kindled in his chest, a tinge of pleasure of contact, of being seen by someone. 

She chuckled when he awkwardly tried to follow her, “You’re doing good!”

Xiao averted his gaze, “You don’t have to flatter me, I’m doing a bad job.”

She smiled, “Everyone’s an amateur until they finally let the inhibitions go and try.” She was careful not to force contact on him. Instead, she guided him, holding onto just his hands. Unconsciously Xiao smiled at their ridiculous moves. 

“Ha!” She said, giving his hands a soft squeeze. “You can smile after all. I was wondering if your face was set in perpetual neutrality.” 

A faint flush crept across his cheeks as they let go of each other’s hands. “Will I see you tomorrow?” She asked expectantly as a ship started sailing into the harbour. 

This time, Xiao didn’t think. Nor did he mind all the demons in his mind telling him no. “Yes. See you tomorrow.” 

Thank you so much for reading! Drop a request if you want a oneshot of any specific character. I'll do my best <3

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #Xiao #xiao x reader #xiao x you #genshin oneshots #Genshin #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #adeptus xiao #genshin impact x you

[westc0astt]

Yes to heaven Jake sully x reader

part 2

˖*⍣˚≛*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⍣˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊⭒"

When he settled in he did not know what to do, the only thing he could set out to do was to keep his children safe and for that they could not see him weak.

Tonowari proposed that he teach him their cultures while the younger sons of the Metkayina clan leader would teach him his and he begged Eywa that they would be able to adapt as he recognized how hard it was to come to a different culture.

"Are you sure you can? I should start with a younger one" Tonowari proposed to Jake seriously doubting if this would go well. The Sully nodded to him tying the leash on the back of his hand to hold on . "Let's go!" He responded to the animal to march forward and after everything seemed to be going well, as he dived his posture faltered and as a result as he fell his tethered hand hurt leaving it completely red.

The clan leader just grimaced in pain as his friends mocked at how stupid the situation seemed to them.

Jake walked towards the shore while bending his ears in pain and as he stepped onto the sand his attention was stolen by the sight of Tonowari's eldest daughter sitting while little girls combed her hair and brought her flowers making the older girl smile in complete delight.

You on the other hand managed to see from afar while playing with the girls, how Toruk Makto after being injured quickly headed home, and you promised yourself that you would go and ask him if he needed anything.

˖*⍣˚≛*-̩̩͙✩-̩̩͙*˚⍣˚*-̩̩͙✩-̩̩͙*˚＊⭒

point of view Jake sully

I was in our Marui watching the sun disappear from any being's view, painting the trees and sand a golden color for the last time in the day. A female shadow appeared in front of me covering my face from the sun's rays and I could observe you again, you were bringing a tray with some kind of bandage and more stuff.

"Can I have a seat?" you ask me with a smile and I just nodded to you silently, I just watched as you put the tray on your legs looking either way looking for the words.

"I saw that your hand is bad and I wanted to help."

After that everything was silent when I gave you the green light to do so you took a cloth, soaked it in some kind of remedy and started cleaning the remains of blood to finish by reciting a prayer in a low voice to Eywa. "You look like you know a lot about this" "It's the usual for me, I'm going to be the next Stahik" you spoke surrounding my hand with the bandage covering it completely.

Looking at the neutral face of the Metkayina woman I noticed that on her chest she had a tattoo of a flower just like the one resting on the side of her hair. "Thank you" and she interrupted me "Don't thank me I do it with pleasure I hope you rest well" then she just disappeared leaving me all alone.

Only a few minutes later Lo'ak, Kiri and Tuk arrived giving me a hug as I felt a tear slide down my cheeks. "Don't cry daddy" Tuk murmured to me with teary eyes.

I tried to cheer them up by asking what they learned today and it encouraged.

"We learned how to ride an ilu."

"I saw lots of fish and beautiful creatures."

"y/n let me comb her hair and took me for a walk around the island" Tuk said as she fell asleep while stroking her head.

#Spotify #jake sully #avatar #jake sully x reader #jake sully smut #toruk makto

[daydreamingleclerc]

uncle!mason request; y/n & mason having to do emergency babysitting of y/n’s nephew and the boy is in love with mason, follows him everywhere, does everything mason does & cries when his parents come pick him up bc he doesn’t wanna leave his new best friend mason?

omg this is so cute.... yes absolutely!!!

i don’t know if i like this as much as i thought but it’s 11:30pm and my migraine has just started to disappear so i’m sorry if it sucks 💘💓💞

new best friend | mason mount fluff

"hi, hi, hi, we're here!" your sister made a noise of relief when you and mason barged through her front door, both of you still bundled in sleepwear.

if it weren't for the fact that it was almost four in the morning, her waters had just broken and billy wasn't allowed to go to the hospital with her, you would both still be asleep.

"there's a list of things you'll need to do with billy when he wakes up later, okay? it's on top of the microwave," your sister pleaded, grabbing both of your hands as her husband brought the car round to the front door of the house. "whatever you do, do not give him a cup of tea before ten o'clock because he won't sleep for the rest of the night. and nursery starts at twelve-thirty, you can't be late."

mason nodded, taking in all of your sisters words and requests with eyes half open, and you waved her off with a smile and a wave. this time tomorrow she would be guaranteed to have a baby in her arms and it was potentially the most excited you'd ever been since billy arrived.

the three year old lay on the sofa rubbing his eyes as the headlights from your brother-in-law's car drove around the corner, and you spotted his shadow in the reflection. "hey billy," you cooed, careful not to startle him in his sleepy state. "me and uncle mase are gonna look after you while mummy and daddy are out, okay? shall we go back to bed?"

the three year old nodded, and you watched with loving eyes as mason scooped him up and carried him to his bedroom. as you set yourself up in your sisters bedroom, mason wandered in with billy's hand in his, a sheepish smile on his face.

"i told him i know spider-man and now he wants to sleep with us."

“of course you did, mason.”

even in the low light you could see your boyfriends cheeks turn a soft shade of pink, and so you rolled your eyes and let the both of them jump into bed with you, the three year old squishing himself in the gap between you both.

"billy?" you asked, with a raised eyebrow, but when the child looked at you with his twinkling blue eyes, your face softened. "i know uncle masey said he knows spider-man but we are still going to need you to go to sleep, okay?" he nodded again, his head immediately falling against mason's chest.

you weren't quite sure when - or how - you went to sleep, but you did. your brother-in-law's alarm clock woke you up at eight, much to your disgust, although mason and billy were nowhere to be found.

"see billy, look," mason held the bright red spider-man spoon up to his mouth, "uncle mason's porridge is so much better than daddy's."

the three year old chomped down on the spoon, wriggling around in the chair mason had sat him in at the table. you admired your boyfriend from afar, watching him chat to billy about what the three of you were going to do before billy headed off to nursery, and billy just sat there licking his chocolate covered lips and watching cocomelon over the table.

"uncle mason's porridge is better than daddy's because uncle mason put chocolate in it," you stated, kissing billy on the head as you entered the room properly. mason frowned, realizing he’d been rumbled.

you toyed with your nephew for a while as he ran riot around the house - running within an inch of his life every time you mentioned bath time. the only way he would sit in the bath without complaining or creating a complete mess would be if mason was in there with him, fighting his dinosaurs with an action man and pretending to be scared of his own reflection in the water.

it looked like your boyfriend wasn’t going to training.

wherever mason went, billy followed, and mason realised he soon couldn’t even go to the toilet without a minutes peace.

he shut himself outside to speak to thomas, apologizing for why he wasn’t at training while kicking one of billy’s marvel themed footballs around the garden, and the whole time billy was inconsolable.

“billy, sweetheart you can’t go out there,” you cooed, picking up the three year old from his place on the living room floor. “uncle mason’s doing important work.”

“but i want to play with him,” he pouted. his speech wasn’t fully developed yet although you managed to make out the gist of what he was saying.

the two of you watched from the window as mason did keepie-uppies with the ball and billy wailed again, desperately wanting to fall in the footsteps of the person he idolized the most.

“mase?” you called from the back door, “any chance of a little helper?”

he laughed, nodding his head and halting his movements with the ball, allowing billy to run up and give it his best kick. you sat with your back against the door, watching as mason played with him and attempted to teach him simple tricks.

billy was having none of it, only wanting to be around mason wherever he was and refusing to actually play any football. he just wanted to hold mason’s hand and kick the ball every once in a while.

when you eventually managed to get him to nursery, he was worse than you thought. the teachers had been briefed previously on why he wasn’t with his parents today, but that didn’t help the situation.

“billy, sweetheart you can’t stay with us,” you cooed, crouching down so you were at his height. you ran your hands through his now-soft hair, and dried his tears with the back of your hand, “do you want me to get uncle mason for you?”

he nodded shyly, and within seconds of waving mason over, he was crouched down at your side too. “billy, i can’t stay at nursery with you, buddy,” mason consoled him, letting the child nuzzle into his chest, “but i promise i’ll come and pick you up later, OK?”

that stopped billy’s tears for a moment, and mason smiled. “i’ll take you to the sweet shop and let you buy whatever you want, and maybe i’ll buy you a new football. does that sound fun?”

billy nodded, and mason kissed his forehead. “promise to be a good boy?”

billy nodded, and you kissed his head once more, the thought of leaving him alone after such a long and exhausting night making you tear up.

“i promise.”

#mason mount #mason mount fluff #mason mount imagine #mason mount blurb #mason mount smut #mason mount x reader #mason mount x fem reader #footballer x fem reader #footballer x reader #football fluff #football imagine #football smut #football blurb #footballer fluff #england imagine #england blurb #hope you enjoyed anon <33 #sorry if it sucks <33

[yumpty-dumpty-inactive]

liar ♡

---

characters included: kazuha ♡

---

warnings: pregnant! female-bodied! reader, angst, abandonment, crying, sadness

---

pronouns: female-bodied reader, but no her or she pronouns <3

---

"kazuha, are you alright?" "hm...? o-oh, yes. i'm fine, love"

he can't shake it. for weeks, this one feeling just hasn't gone away. he feels there needs to be a layer of caution placed upon himself in your presence, a feeling he's never felt, ever. he doesn't yet possess the knowledge as to why this churning in his gut continues to happen, but time will tell, I suppose.

"kazuha, do you, want children? one day, I mean."

the question was harmless and innocent, and at this point, only natural. the two of you had been an item for five years at this point, and were now in your mid 20's. you had recently stumbled upon old friends of yours, who had given birth to their first child. the one thing that startled kazuha, however, was your look. the expression of admiration and envy you wore when watching that child explained everything for itself. he knew, now, what it was you wanted.

"good question, but i'm not sure. I haven't given it any thought."

liar. he had given it thought. much thought. for the past week, that exact thought kept him awake for hours, as he tossed and turned, trying to avoid the thoughts that invaded his mind.

"oh..."

---

he knew it. he knew it the minute you ran up to him, a bright smile engulfing your charming face. the moment you told him you were pregnant, his world crumbled. a family? he'd never had one, and suddenly he had his own? it made no sense.

"you're...pregnant?"

your smile faded.

"y-yes? is there something wrong with that?"

"no, not at all. this is...wonderful news."

"I know right? we're going to be a family!"

"yes, yes we are"

that night, everything seemed darker. the shadows seemed larger, the bed seemed colder, and his mind only ran faster. enough was to be had, and kazuha rose from your shared bed, slipping into his regular attire. slipping out of the bedroom, he grabbed his anemo vision, the glowing orb resting in its case. hand on the doorknob, he sighed, about to head out when he heard your sleepy voice,

"kazuha? where are you going...?"

the sleepy and innocent look in your eyes crushed him, your pure mind completely unaware of what he was about to do.

"just for a walk, love. I'll be back soon"

liar.

"oh, would you like me to come with you?"

liar.

"no...I'll be alright."

liar.

"oh, okay..."

liar.

he watched your form disappear into the darkness, hearing the distant sound of the bed creak, signaling your return to it. he almost felt sorry for you, sorry that he had to abandon you like this. opening the door, he left, not to return.

---

"it's cold..."

that was your first thought. you opened your eyes, only to see his side of the bed empty. the sheets were cold, the warm body of your lover missing. rising from your bed, you searched the whole house, but he was nowhere to be found.

---

it was three weeks later when you received a letter, addressed to you. you opened the intricate envelope, reading the letter:

my dearest (Y/N),

hello, I'm aware that we've not spoken in a while. if you're wondering where I am, which knowing you, you probably are, I shall tell you. I'm away. away on a trip. one I will never return from.

"what?"

I'm sorry I've abandoned you like this, and I know it must hurt. I cannot bear to watch you suffer, but for a family, I am not ready. the chained love that once bound us, I'm afraid is gone. it has faded, and I'm afraid it will not return. like waves on the sea, my mind can change in an instant. I'm sorry it's changed now, of all times.

tears began to spill.

I love you, but not nearly as much as I once did. it's not fair to tie you down in a way such as this, so (Y/N), I'm setting you free.

you sobbed.

you are indeed the last of your kind as I've always told you, and I hope you find someone who realizes that and embraces it, unlike me. before I fully set you free, there is something I want you to know.

when you decide to move on, please, don't let these painful memories blind you. as far as our child goes, please don't reject them. it's not their fault I've left, it's mine. don't let the past remind you of me, let it remind you of better memories.

farewell, (Y/N)

kazuha

you ran. you ran as fast as you could, away. away from everything. from kazuha, from your child, from your house, everything.

you found yourself at the alcor, sprinting desperately below deck into the captain's cabin. slamming the door open, you collapsed, letter in hand, panting desperately. the captain's eyes widened, scooping you up, calling for help while studying your letter.

---

he had watched. he had watched from afar as you opened the letter, breaking down in a state of shock and despair. it hurt him, yes. but he was a liar. he couldn't help it. he was running away. running away out of fear, something he had always done. he was clawing his way out of his pit of despair, only to lose balance and fall into the abyss once again. he told you he'd always be with you, he told you he'd never leave you, but then again,

he was a liar.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin angst #genshin impact angst #genshin kazuha #kadehara kazuha #genshin kadehara #genshin impact kazuha #kazuha #kazuha x reader #kazuha angst #kazuha x you #kazuha x (Y/N) #kazuha x yn #yumpty post :D! #;____;

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

There's this sort of trope I've noticed in a lot of Twilight fanfiction where the Cullens do not return as quickly as they did in canon during New Moon and somehow inexplicably run into Bella years later, when she's in her early-to-mid twenties and I was wondering how you think this would go? In my head the Cullens would skedaddle the second they got a whiff of Bella, but suspending disbelief there I always have a hard time buying it whenever older Bella ends up back together with Edward.

I think it depends on the Cullen in question, or, if it’s all the Cullens together.

The Yoko Ono Effect

To be honest, if the Cullens had stayed away in New Moon, I don’t think they would have made it as a singular unit to five-ten years down the road. The cracks were already to show even a few months in.

This isn’t to say Bella is responsible for the collapse of the Cullens, I believe they’re doomed anyway, but she serves as a catalyst.

After leaving Forks in New Moon the Cullens immediately begin drifting apart.

Edward is despondent and depressed, within a few weeks leaves the coven, and travels down the continent until he reaches Rio where he stays for months. Note, Edward knew by the time he hit Rio that he had long since lost Victoria’s trail (for the record, he lost her in Mexico) but I think it’s very telling he does not return to the coven.

I don’t think Edward was ever coming back.

This puts a significant strain on Emse, as Edward is far and away her favorite child, and she’s noted as being anxious and severely unhappy with Edward’s disappearance. In time, I believe this would lead to the collapse of Esme and Carlisle’s dumpster fire marriage (which at this point only survives on denial and miscommunication).

Alice and Jasper leave the group to both a) get out of dodge b) investigate Alice’s past. While they do later return things are... awkward.

Rosalie desperately tries to keep the family together, tells Edward the bad news to a) be the only one with the balls to tell him and b) hopefully get him to come back to the family. This, obviously, doesn’t work.

I think without Bella’s suicide attempt the coven would have broken apart probably within the year. Rosalie desperately would have tried to keep them together, but Esme would crack and go to be with Edward, Carlisle would let her go, Alice and Jasper would probably keep their heads down and go on extended honeymoons, and eventually they all realize there’s just nothing to go back to. 

They go their separate ways.

The Cullens Are Still Cullening

But lets pretend that things work out.

Edward gets tired of being depressed in Rio and comes back to... be depressed with the family. To be honest, I don’t think he’d get over this. Edward was severely depressed before Bella.

He was very contemptuous not only of his own family but of humanity in general. Yes, he has this very strange idolation of humanity but he also views them as inherently beneath him and lesser. High school is his purgatory where he listens to the mundane thoughts of mundane mayfly humans.

He outright despises Jasper and Rosalie and even Carlisle, who he adores, he often views as something of a fool in great need of Edward’s personal protection.

Edward has lost all passion in life, even in his hobbies like music, and is slowly but surely spiraling down into a place where he can never recover. His obsession with Bella, while far from a good thing, brings light back into his life.

This is an Edward who gave that all up and willingly returns back to what he used to be. And I think that would destroy something in him. Frankly, I think it’d leave him in an even worse place than canon.

So, if the Cullens run into a now adult Bella...

Well, it’d be a clusterfuck.

Edward will be very conflicted as he tried to leave for Bella’s own good but now she’s done exactly what he wanted. She grew up and got over him, Edward presumably means nothing to her now.

Worse, there is now such a gap between them. Edward is physically much younger than she is now, he poses as a high school student while she’s an adult. Bella’s fears were warranted, she’s too old for him now, and in many ways has outgrown him.

If Bella’s in any sort of relationship with anyone, I think Edward would flip his lid, and murder her significant other. As he often fantasized murdering Mike as well as her nameless future husband. If she’s single...

I think with enough time, distance, and therapy Bella would be able to make significant strides towards a healthier mindset. She’d get over her depression and in turn over Edward. She might be angry at him for a while but in time would likely decide that he had left her for what were immature but noble reasons.

What they had was nice, but the relationship was never going to last. Even when she was a teenager, she knew this, which was why she so desperately wanted to be a vampire.

She likely might talk to him to find closure, but I imagine a more mature Bella realizes they know nothing about each other. She’s had so much time in her life now without him and he’s so different from what she remembered, younger. There’s no way to start a relationship, more, Edward himself realized it was never going to work.

I imagine Edward doesn’t take this well either. For all that Edward says he wants certain things, really, he does an impressive job making sure Bella never ran from him. Bella legitimately not being interested in him would destroy him and... likely lead to him devouring Bella eventually.

After all, Alice had predicted that Edward would not be able to stay away and that, ultimately, there are only two futures for Bella: death or vampire.

Edward Comes Back Alone

Alice had predicted that Edward would not be able to keep his distance from Bella. He tries twice. Once, in Twilight, when Alice first announces that Edward is in love with Bella and she will become a vampire. The second time is New Moon.

The first, he cracks in a week. It just doesn’t work out and Edward has a minature crisis over it and tells himself it’s fine because he has to protect her from spiders therefore he has to be in her life AND THIS IS FINE.

The second, he notes that he’s dangerously close to cracking and Alice predicted he couldn’t do it. He makes it six months, but does confess to Bella he often considered finding her again and watching her life from the shadows in Rio.

So, I highly doubt that Edward would make it to five or ten years or that he’d make it with the Cullens. He probably comes back alone by the time Bella’s senior year starts, and intends to watch her from the shadows.

Now, given the plot of Twilight, he realizes that nothing’s working out. Bella’s not free from the supernatural, as her best friend/potential new love interest is a werewolf who might maul her any second now. She’s being hunted by Victoria and everything’s spiralling out of control.

So, Edward probably gives up the charade fast and comes back to get Jake out of the picture and be very upset with Bella for ruining his plan. Bella’s just glad Edward is back. Given Edward probably calls the entire family back, who likely have nothing to say to this nonsense, things proceed pretty much as in canon.

Jasper Runs Across Bella

Considering the last time he saw her, Jasper would run like the hounds of hell are on his heels. This is a world in which he never sees much of Bella after the birthday incident and, as a result, is still mired in guilt. He can’t imagine Bella’s reaction upon seeing him in the wild nor does he want to.

Rosalie Runs Across Bella

Rosalie likely makes no contact. She probably views Bella with bitterness, sees her as the reason for the collapse of her family, and never understood Bella’s appeal in the first place. However, for all Rosalie’s bitterness, she wouldn’t take it out on Bella mostly because there’s nothing to say.

She’d just choose to be distantly happy for Bella that she got to live her human life and glad she adjusted well.

Emmett Runs Across Bella

Emmett and Bella don’t actually know each other that well, Emmett certainly has no personal connection with her. He wouldn’t make contact because it’d be awkward and would piss off Rose.

Alice Runs Across Bella

Alice doesn’t agree with Edward, but she’s also proving a point to him and ultimately values Edward far more than she does Bella. She’ll abide by his rules and not speak to Bella. Also, she sees that if she tries, there’s no way the conversation goes well as Alice would have to explain why she never answered any emails.

Best to avoid that.

Esme Runs Across Bella

Esme values Edward over everything, and while she perhaps thinks that Bella could fix Edward’s desperate unhappiness I think she’d acknowledge that Edward also doesn’t want to see her. She’d snoop from afar but ultimately, I don’t think she’d make contact.

If she did, it’d be with the sole purpose of matchmaking the adult Bella with Edward, which would lead to disaster.

Carlisle Runs Across Bella

Carlisle I think actually would talk to her, to offer up some explanation of what happened and how they got where they are. He and Bella would likely talk about vampires, the Cullen way of life, etc. and ultimately go their separate ways.

He’d try to give closure if she wants it but nothing more than that.

Though if he thinks Bella doesn’t want to talk/see him or any Cullen, he’d likely also make himself scarce.

Some Thoughts On Fanfiction

But that’s not why people are writing these types of stories, and, really while I can give my depressing takes on Twilight I think it’s fair to note that people write these fics for significantly different reasons.

#twilight #twilight meta #twilight headcanon #twilight renaissance #edward cullen #anti edward cullen #bella swan #edward/bella #anti edward/bella #jasper whitlock #alice cullen #rosalie hale #emmett cullen #carlisle cullen #esme cullen #the cullens #meta #headcanon #opinion