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#I know this is on me for even posting abt them otherwise I could’ve just been delusional or smth but yeah
nevarroes · 2 months
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nothums-from-tj · 17 days
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Hi I’ve arrived to shove a Dakavendish theory down ur throat <3
MML spoilers if you haven’t finished it yet
Hmmmm also if you end up writing this pleeeeeeease rb w/send me the link, otherwise I’ll be writing this when I finally have the energy to do so <3
So it’s common behavior for people to be most judgmental abt what they’re most insecure about. What does Cav mostly pick apart? Being taken seriously, and being competent. Based on the alien invasion, hence seemingly the reason he went rogue, it was a huge thing that he felt he wasn’t being taken seriously, and then to think that Dakota—his only constant—thinks he’s crazy, that seemed to be a breaking point. I’m sure even with knowing about the ILD, that could’ve solidified some idea along the lines of “I can’t believe I’m so useless that Dakota had to save me that many times.” (Maybe I’m projecting. Maybe both idk it’s my post)
TigerUnknown on AO3 had this idea of Dakota requesting a partner change early into them working together, and I really like that it adds depth to their relationship in the sense that it really took some extra time to get used to one another. Even when they were first assigned partners, there was still a bit of tension despite the new understanding with one another
All that said: what if the first time Cav died was to save Dakota?
Like he spends the whole mission after that trying to prove himself to Dakota and nothing’s going as planned, Dakota’s getting annoyed/frustrated as much as he’s not showing it (not much anyway) and Cav is even more frustrated and humiliated that things are worse than they usually are. He breaks down at one point finally expressing how he’s trying so hard to be good enough and to show he’s worth something and Dakota feels horrible bc it was never meant to make him feel bad it’s just a matter of preference
Mid-breakdown or nearing the end is when he notices Dakota being in danger that he doesn’t notice either, Cav becomes human shield/pushes him out of the way, cue first Cav death
Dakota can only sit in shock at the realization of. Everything and can only attempt to process before eventually going back and saving himself and Cav, maybe even killing his past self in the process so he didn’t have to deal with that right away
Things continue on and Dakota is still struggling but suddenly he’s a bit more easygoing and reassuring, and Cav has no idea what happened bc last he knew he was about to die and Dakota was pretty distant—not exactly cold, just the way most coworkers talk to one another. Now he’s talking to him like a scared child and Cav thinks he’s patronizing him and there’s not much to convince him otherwise, but with Dakota insisting on a distraction he just goes along w it and their relationship actually builds from there
Dakota never really forgives himself for upsetting Cav as much as he did then, even if it was completely unintentional, and especially couldn’t live with himself if he let him stay dead after everything Cav shared with him
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sickgraymeat · 9 months
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Ooooh!!! 20 for the ask game :D
part of canon you found tedious or boring
I wrote most of this several hours ago and just barely edited it lol so hope it makes sense! Added some spaces which probably doesn’t help a whole lot lol it’s… very long. Thanks for asking!!!! You don’t have to read it all hshbdnnrns
This one is actually probably p nonviolent bc I don’t think this is a very controversial take round these parts! But definitely all of Finn’s romantic plot lines. I can sort of make an argument abt how they reflect the part of his character that’s really invested in the fairytale idea of being a hero which implies being the romantic lead
(I lean toward hcing him as aroace but don’t feel super strongly abt it, but that or gay or otherwise not into women also adds a comphet element— regardless it’s an interesting parallel with lots of characters but in particular Bonnie, who very clearly has lived her life according to rules she gathered and interpreted about who and what a princess is AND what a girl is. Very gendered so for Finn there’s a bit of toxic masculinity involved in his romantic pursuits and also his inclination toward violence in the earlier seasons. Plus the whole overarching theme of rebuilding society post-post-apocalypse and most of the characters kind of forcing themselves into a mold using what they know and don’t know about past societies combined with how their own has interacted w them.
Comphet also obviously parallel with Bonnie continuing to call Mr. CP her boyfriend etc etc etc, but also maybe more relevant— I hc Marceline as bi so I dont think being attracted to men is compulsory for her but still think heteronormativity is very relevant to her story & I think the same would be true for Finn regardless of orientation. Actually very similar for both of them subconsciously recreating heteronormative relationships which are so reflective of their own specific family structures— Marcy drawn to the Hunson in Ash and dare I say the Simon and the Betty AND the Elise in Bonnie? + Finn drawn to both the Minerva and the Margaret in Bonnie and FP and, to an extent, HW too. Caregivers who are also leaders and answer to no one. HW is a little less officially this but I’d argue that as a female character heavily associated with both nature and protection she is inherently at least a little bit mom-adjacent-coded or something idk what I’m saying but yeah that! Digression lol.)
BUT way overdone even if that was the intention. A lot of that time could’ve been spent on him and Jake and BMO doing silly shit or like expanding on his relationships with Jermaine and Margaret and Joshua and Fern and the humans etc etc. and/or more depth for the love interests themselves. Ofc I always want more Bonnie and there’s a lot more to dig into with FP (and the two of them together for that matter!) & also HW has such a cool design and she’s interesting but I feel like I don’t know much about her and had she and Finn had a different relationship there may have been more room for her to develop. It feels like fan service though I’m guessing now it’s not actually in service of most ppl who are still really big fans. Maybe more so network service lol.
Also sad that some of those songs (all gummed up slaps too hard) and episodes are really good/funny imo I wish they were about something else 😭 (too young is extremely important to me I refuse to discount it but I obvs understand why a lot of ppl want to it’s super frustrating/disappointing.)
Anyway!!!! Thank you for asking and thank you everyone who reads this!!
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mausolealdrift · 11 months
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Do you have a deathgasm notp??? Sincerely, a canon zakk/Medina was a fucking cosmic fuck up incident truther
oh you’re absolutely right i have So many thoughts about this. sorry this took me forever to answer i needed to collect all of my thoughts together and all of that i am Normal about Characters
so like . for obvious reasons the thought of ppl genuinely shipping zakk and medina as in like……… thinking theyd actually be good together or smthn is a fucking insane idea and im So very glad ive only seen maybe one person say some shit like that. (which like. honestly im starting to think i might have imagined the post in my head just to make myself mad bc i havent been able to find it since ??? but i SWEAR i saw someone shipping them once .) the two of em actually being in a relationship would just be. Awful and unhealthy for both of them
(and yeah zakk and brodie arent exactly healthy for each other either . but in the sense that they both make each other Worse yet neither of them can stay away from the other even if they want to etc etc. which is actually sexy and not just . y’know)
but anyway . yeah Definitely a cosmic fuck up. medina deserves better than that :( like she’s been objectified and treated like shit by pretty much every guy who looks her way and then zakk lies to her abt the one guy who actually respects her to manipulate her into hooking up w him. give her a BREAK
but as much as it was The dick move of the century i think zakk had his reasons for it aside from just boredom. Obviously this is all very much my personal and extremely biased interpretation etc. but i think it was out of frustration more than anything else because he just can’t fucking cope with having feelings for brodie. regardless of whether you see those feelings as romantic or not he Cares too much about him. and he doesn’t know how to handle that so he takes his anger and frustration out on medina in such a spiteful and destructive way because it’s all he knows how to do. and whether he knows why or not, the idea of brodie getting closer with medina bothers him so so deeply – enough for him to try and sabotage their relationship at every chance he gets (and then later trying to keep them apart to stop brodie finding out what he did because he doesn’t want to lose him) under the guise of just being bored or only caring about himself.
and i really don’t think there’s much of a possibility that he did it because he was into her, or jealous of brodie, or anything like that. zakk never showed interest in her at all until then (i.e. when she made a move to try and get closer with brodie) and just….. seemed generally pretty indifferent to her otherwise. if he really wanted to then he could’ve made a move before, but he didn’t.
he purposefully did something that he knew would hurt them both if they (inevitably) found out, maybe not because he genuinely wanted to hurt them but because he’s reckless and destructive in nature, (and maybe a little bit stupid sometimes), and just doesn’t know how else to handle or comprehend his feelings other than to take it out on other people.
i think a lot of the dickhead-ish shit zakk does in the movie seems kind of random and thoughtless and it’s difficult to unpick what his motivations are for the things he does aside from just ‘because’, but a lot of it starts to make a lot more sense when you see it as a result of him caring about brodie far more than he wants to, and not knowing how to handle it. he seems so cruel and uncaring, and he definitely wants to be seen that way, but i think he cares deeper than anyone else in his own (kind of incomprehensible) way. and yeah, it’s still shitty and selfish and fucked up, and he still took advantage of medina and used her regardless of why, but i dunno. i think the reasons for it were a lot more complex than he let on.
(again, maybe i’m reading too much into it all and he is just a fucking cunt who just did shitty things for no reason, but the fact that he still came back for brodie after everything, despite how mad he was, even though it led to him dying in the end, is more than enough to show that he really does care too much for his own good.)
so yeah uh. i don’t fucking know how this went from ‘yeah i think zakk/medina sucks’ to a full-on analysis of zakk. But i dont care actually i love being fucking insufferable about this stupid movie <3
sorry for the massive fucking wordvomit im tortured by the curse of Thinking about characters
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owen-not-carvour · 1 year
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ok i want to talk about bluey for a minute. won’t be my new focus ofc but. i want to talk about it.
specifically what makes it So fascinating and legitimately Good to pretty much All age ranges. both overall and for me personally. therefore,, long post. buckle up :)
also i just want to say that liking bluey when you’re older is only weird if you/people Make it weird. if you’re just enjoying it for what it is (ie the things that i’m gonna talk abt in this post !!) then there’s no reason you can’t like it!! ((basically i’m very afraid of being judged for this so i have to keep telling myself that it’s just like liking any other piece of really well done media. bc like. bluey Is well done. on so many levels))
that being said. bluey. it’s fuckin Incredible across the board. here’s why:
first things first: the Content of bluey. it doesn’t treat kids like they don’t know anything. in fact, pretty much everything in bluey is shown through things most kids already Do. like 99% of the time bluey episodes are just about kids Existing and doing kid stuff like playing games (which bluey and bingo do a LOT of) and interacting with their friends, parents and community as a whole! and the way it Does that is so realistic to how kids actually act (trust me. summer camp counselor here).. it’s got all the randomness and creativity that kids always have when they express what’s in their heads!!
so then bluey Takes that and puts it into something that is enjoyable to watch for virtually anyone.. bc for kids, that’s what they Do so it’s relatable to them…
but for other age groups it’s nostalgic. like i watch bluey and i’m reminded of a) my kids at camp :) and b) myself when i was younger… and it’s just a cool way to get some of those memories back.. like the barky boats ep!! my school did the “buddies” thing too :) that one is one of my favorite eps in the whole show for that reason!!
and that’s also why watching bluey can legitimately be so Healing too.. (or on the other hand can make you realize you have more Issues than you thought. also speaking abt myself here lol) because the heeler family is So healthy (like holy shit their communication is incredible) while still being realistic (they Aren’t perfect!!) so it’s like. you watch it and it’s like. woah. this is something that Could’ve happened. it is possible. and even when you’re older you can watch bluey and take stuff out of it, parent or not..
(also i want to mention chili and bandits marriage, too. not just the way they parent but how they also just genuinely have a good marriage!! and seeing that is so nice bc like. they may be cartoon dogs but i still want what they have yknow)
i think bluey can also make people more… empathetic?? i guess,, towards kids. like i like kids just fine. don’t want to Have any when i’m older but.. bluey provides a better understanding as to how they Work. it shows their thought processes through the games and decisions the heeler sisters and co make so anyone older who watches (parents or otherwise) can interact with them and Understand them better. the whole show is really good abt tackling generational gaps like that too. it goes back to the communication the heeler family has. like seriously. it shows it makes a difference!
also i love how it shows that bluey has this Habit she does to process events.. she’ll basically make whatever Happened into a game to help her understand better and she’ll just do it all exactly how it happened in her actual life. she does it in daddy putdown (the ep where chili had to leave for a night to go to a baby shower) and copycat (bluey starts out just copying bandit but then they find a hurt bird, they took it to the vet, but it still died) and i just think that’s rlly cool that bluey Does that..
last Content thing i want to talk abt is just how amazing the way bluey covers heavier topics like death, even if it’s just an animal (copycat) and infertility (onesies) is. it doesn’t go Too deep, but still deep enough for kids to understand that it’s important to Know about more real life stuff too yknow.. camping kind of does this with the whole language barrier between bluey and jean luv too.. it just kinda Touches on things so kids can understand that other situations exist (i guess that’s the best way to say it??) without getting Too heavy! and i think that’s just really cool.
(not to mention that the storylines of so many bluey episodes are so fucking beautiful and heart wrenching in the best way. the story telling across the whole show is just Gorgeous!!)
anyway. there’s gonna be a part 2 to this where i talk abt the Aesthtic aspects of bluey,, but for now. here’s this :)
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tohokuu · 1 year
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i just need to rant for a minute. also my tumblr is still glitching even after i deleted and redownloaded it.
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i cant actually see any of the words i’m typing … i had to change the color to pink in order to see it bc the white just comes out as black… anyway. this is very boy oriented bc i’m talking about relationships so if you don’t care, fuck off and keep scrolling. honestly this feels a little pathetic bc i’m going to be honest about the mistakes i’ve made in the last 6 months and how you should completely avoid them LOL
so back in october, i met this guy on campus that had been going to the same college as me for a while now but i just… never saw him. LOL. like he was so different looking last year and this year he’s all tall, muscular, beard etc. otherwise, i had no idea he even existed ?? ☠️ anyway, let’s call him uhhh gojo. so, i met gojo and i was like wow he’s really cute. btw, i can develop crushes on multiple guys but it’ll only be like … crushes where i find them hot and would be okay w dating them but i’m not like dying to date them and want them yk ? but this guy… i wanted him. like i couldn’t stop thinking abt this guy. we started talking and snapping back and forth for a good few weeks. we opened up about some stuff and idk it was really chill. we were gonna go to a party together and i was driving him and like… we smoked together in the car and nothing else. just talking and vibing and it was amazing. my crush obviously got stronger but the night of the party, he goes and leaves me alone at the party to hang out w other girls and i’m like … yo ??? then at the end of the night, we get into a fight over something extremely minuscule and he unadds me and i’m like yo ?… i was actually so upset and hurt. like i cried abt this in class LMAOFJSJ i never cry over guys bruh and i cried over this dumbass mf bc i genuinely really liked this guy. now… igotoveritmostlyafter a few weeks and suddenly, this guy i had on social media who i have mutuals with asks me on a date and i’m like … let’s see where it goes. we go out and it’s the first date. i pay for our starbucks. he pays for the fries and even now i’m thinking, why did i ever offer to pay so hard ?… ew. i’m not a 50/50 woman and if you disagree, idc smd. anyway, date goes well and obviously i’m still hung up over gojo just a bit but i really enjoyed my first date and i couldn’t stay hurt over a stupid talking stage yk ?.. like that’s not the way to go about life. so we ended up going on a second date. then a third, a fourth, a fifth and then it turned into a relationship that lasted just about 5 months. anyway… the first couple months of my relationship were very happy. my boyfriend was the best. the sweetest… the typical nice guy who did literally everything right. he wasn’t rich or bought me expensive gifts like gojo could have but he cared and he talked to me and loved me and that’s all that mattered. a few months later someone follows me on instagram… guess who ? gojo !!! follows me on ig and i had posted a note saying “guys i miss him :(“ and he texted me saying “who?” and i’m like “my boyfriend. why?” and he leads a conversation where it’s him accusing my boyfriend of cheating and me telling him to stfu. i obviously defend my boyfriend and i tell him about it ofc and my boyfriends outrageous ofc bc he’s got such a good character and he couldn’t stand anyone insulting that yk.. which is fine. anyway, gojo found a way to just insert himself into my life somehow. now you’re probably thinking that i could’ve just blocked him but atp, he was friends with my friends and i was like… it’s gonna be really awkward if i block him. so i kept him on social media and i’d just leave him on delivered for days and not answer. but this guys also a character bc he’d text me going. “respond. i know you’re on your phone. text me back” and i would… idk why i did. but it was always him talking about this one girl that he’s in love with and he’s always fucking talking about her and a part of me got jealous… then i was mad at myself for being jealous bc i had a whole man and i had no right to be jealous at all. i kept leaving him on delivered at later that and i would constantly tell myself “always choose your aman” which is like a bollywood movie and the lesson was to always pick the guy that will treat you good forever and not the guy who lost you and then realized what he lost and came back for you, bc she chose the dickhead in the film. anyway, i kept telling myself that it wasn’t worth it. now… when i was with my boyfriend or texting my boyfriend, i’d only ever think of him. gojo wasn’t even a
thought in my mind and that’s totally chill. that’s what i wanted in the very first place. but then i’d text gojo back sometimes and answer his texts faster than i’d answer my boyfriends … this is where i started feeling guilty. then i’d listen to songs like “moth to a flame” by the weeknd and i’d feel extremely guilty. i felt like i was emotionally cheating. i felt horrible bc i’m not the type of person who cheats or done anything that wrong bc that’s not me… but why was i feeling these emotions for gojo when i had my boyfriend ?… i’ve always been the sensible person in relationships that knows how to give perfect advice. my stance on cheating was always that if you want someone else, break up with your current significant other because they don’t deserve to feel like their heart is being played with. but here, now that i was stuck in that situation, it genuinely felt so so hard and i wanted to cry bc i kept seeing more movies, songs and references to this stupid love triangle and i was so so annoyed. also, disclaimer ! my boyfriend was never physically my type. i think he’s cute and good looking but wasn’t my type. i think i was just really ignoring everything else and going straight for the personality. then when i’d look at gojo… gojo was my dream man. he’s so cute to me and it made me mad how i was having these thoughts?? so like i came to the conclusion that i should break up with my man… so i did. i broke up with him 3 weeks ago and i was so so brutal with him bc i knew if i was any softer, i’d turn back on my word. he’s just that. fucking. kind. he’s so so amazing, even as of today. i couldn’t have left him if i wasn’t so harsh on him :/ anyway, broke up with him and this whole time i’m still friends with gojo. we never flirted or anything but the day i broke up with him, somehow i end up in his car. i was leaving campus after hours and he texted me while i’m at the light and he goes “is that you i just saw leaving?” i said “yeah. want me to come back?” and he goes “hmmm i’m bored. yes.” now you’re thinking… i’m a major red flag !!! yes… i am 😃 i go back and we park next to each other and i sit in his car with him in the passenger seat and ykw… it wasn’t awkward at all. it was natural, funny, sweet… we sat in his car and talked for hours. we talked about my breakup, we talked about the girl he loves, we talked about the bitches he’s busy with and so much other shit.
conversation with my boyfriend never flew as mindlessly as it did with him. i guess it makes more sense bc i rarely saw my boyfriend. i’d only see him every week or so but i saw gojo almost every single day, even if we didn’t talk to each other. but gojo and me had more in common… we related on more. i found him more attractive and there were things that i didn’t have in my first relationship that he had. i sound like such a piece of shit right now, i know. but i convinced myself for 5 months that i don’t need any of that stuff to be in a happy relationship. i kept my relationship going on the whole “always choose your aman” thing.. it was a sweet relationship but even as my friends said … there was no chemistry between us. and the sex ! my ex boyfriend used to be bi until a month ago, he’s straight now. he has a lot of bodies …. which i don’t care abt the number but they were literally all men, which i also don’t really care about. it’s just that he’s never had sex with a woman before and yk i was willing to be his first and it made me feel a bit insecure. it’s a shameful thing to be insecure abt and i know i shouldn’t be but i was. the making out was great, being in his lap was fun and he knew how to kiss me properly and everything. i asked him to choke me and he did it properly despite him being a pretty vanilla guy. but when we had sex… he just couldn’t do it right no matter how much i told him what to do. like i was so engrossed in teaching him bc he was fucking up so bad that it took me half an hour to cum… then when he put his dick in me, he hardly stretched me out and it hurt so bad and he wasn’t doing it properly and i was genuinely just mad at that point 😃 i told him to stop and i just sucked him off and called it a day. then there’s things like a bit of pda or etc that i wanted. we’re young, i think it’s normal to want a risky and more adrenaline rushed relationship, or at least it’s what i need… now asking him of that is unfair, i know. i asked and he said no and i was like “that’s all okay !!” but like lowkey i was starting to get bored bc there’s so many things i wanted to do and he didn’t. obviously i respected it but i don’t have to agree with it. still, i kept moving on and i think that’s why i started to think about gojo more bc gojo is someone who would’ve done all of those things… i wanted to make out in an empty elevator once and he pushed me off and said no and i was like “oh :(“ which is fine on his part !! he doesn’t have to do any of that stuff and it’s fine bc everyone has their reasons and boundaries. but i don’t find the fun in that. him and i had very opposite personalities and i know opposites attract but these were things that i didn’t like compromising on. i know you’re probably thinking that i fucked up and ruined my perfect picture and that’s exactly what gojo said to me when i told him about the breakup while i was sitting in his car. he told me “you had the perfect picture. the sweet boyfriend who knew how to treat you and you left him.” yeah left him bc i couldn’t stop thinking of you, you fucking idiot. i was emotionally cheating and my boyfriend was SO not deserving of that. he’s way too good of a man to have someone do that to him so i cut it off. i felt horrible but i had to do it. i didn’t deserve someone like him. he was really really sad and i felt bad bc i was so brutal over the call and yes… another dickhead move. i broke up with him over call and that was bc i wasn’t able to see him for another month cuz he was traveling. i had to be mean otherwise, i knew i would’ve caved in and just… ignored my feelings for gojo again. now if you’re wondering, did i get with gojo ? nope. did i try ? nope. ykw i did tho?… encourage him to better his relationship with the girl he likes, bc i really enjoy doing that to myself LMFAO i told him what to do on valentine’s day, i told him what to do on new years, i told him what to do for her birthday… cuz he’s a fucking idiot but he’s literally obsessed with her and i can’t help but just stay out of it even tho i like him so damn much. but he’s
also fucking stupid because why are you fucking other bitches while you like this girl ?? but she’s also confusing bc she doesn’t want a relationship while he does and when she says that she just wants to be friends, he treats her like a friend and then she gets mad that he doesn’t give her any romantic attention. i told my guy bestfriend, david, about this and even he agreed that she’s just using him for attention… and i kinda realized that a long time ago but he’s so blindly in love w her that idk what to tell him. i tried to tell him to focus on himself and get his shit together but nahhh, he told me to stfu and flicked my forehead instead. oh and then those two are just friends, he goes out and fucks other girls to curb the loneliness ig and then she gets mad at him for it… you aren’t in a relationship ??? 😀 anyway, gojo is honestly a dickhead. do i still want him ? yes. should i ? no, bc the red flags are obviously very much there and i cant help but be attracted to them and i hate it sm. fuck gojo tho.
back to my breakup, first week i was chilling. told myself i never needed him and that shit is better off this way bc he wasn’t even all that. second week, i was fine during the day but i would get lonely at night when all my friends were asleep and he would’ve stayed up to talk to me about some random video game or i’d tell him abt some interesting fic i read. this third week was hell tho… i thought abt him 24/7. i wanted to talk to him so bad . i texted him and just told him i was checking in and it was a nice conversation but it felt so plastic and i hated it. he has given away most of my stuff and i haven’t given away a single thing. also, if i’m regurgitating, it’s bc i wrote half of this rant last night while i was half asleep and now i’m writing the rest so idk what i wrote last night. moving on, he told his parents i was his girlfriend and not just a friend and that’s very awkward bc his mom actually works at my college and i’m like… yo… so i always duck whenever i see her, it’s embarrassing. now, i’m just missing him all the time. but i tell myself that i did this for a good reason and that it’s what was best for the both of us and i know what i did was the right thing but i still feel like such a horrible person… he said he’s fine now but i still feel his absence daily but then i tell myself that it’s me missing the attention, not him. i tell myself and i feel better and then i tell myself that i’m not wrong for what i did. it’s okay that our breakup had an impact bc he was someone i genuinely loved and had a relationship and it’s okay to wish things could have worked out and it’s okay to keep stepping up and doing yourself a favor. so now, i’m sitting here with uhhh no gojo and no boyfriend and ykw, it’s chill. it’s not that bad. are there momentary feelings of sadness ? ofc. but it’s fine. there’s like 15 guys in my dms rn and i have bitches !! so that’s cool but i don’t want any of them… so they’re never getting texted back ! but yeah. that was the rant. pls don’t do what i did. it’s such a mindfuck and honestly, i feel like the villain and ik i should bc what i did was super fucked up but uhm… yeah
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edgaralienpoe · 1 year
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hi, i’m back as promised. my actual reactions are under this post (and it’s reblogs) it’s well documented 🤣 also forgive me!! this ask is quite a long one 😭
we’re in on it for the same reason!! 🙃 i discovered park jihoon earlier last year bc of at a distance spring is green and i was hearing news abt this new show he’d be in that his character strays away from the boy next door types he’d been playing.
initially, i thought the show was quite unrealistic (the part where they managed to successfully stop some huge scheme that was going on, yeah, high schoolers?? fr??) and i hate seeing that in shows that someone mirror reality but i changed my mindset, started just looking over the unrealistic parts and immersed myself in the found family of the trio 🥹 (big mistake, really fucked myself up there). also it’s true what you mentioned abt the violence bc it’s somewhat a peek into why people did what they did to survive in the hellhole of a school (or show lol)
i thought it was well done for something so short (minus the first quarter or first half 😭) specially loved it when we started seeing into the trio more? I LOVED THEM SO MUCH AND I KNOW THAT IF CIRCUMSTANCES WERE DIFFERENT THEY COULD’VE BEEN REALLY GREAT FRIENDS! you can’t tell me otherwise :(
about bumseok, my thoughts in the posts/rbs are not representatives of how i think of him today pls do not take me seriously 😭 i was just rlly mad at him and looking for someone to blame when i knew (or know now that) it’s not his fault. i think all he ever wanted was a place where he felt like he belonged and for acceptance and for ppl to look at him as their equal rather than smth to look down on. while i think he really misinterpreted the situation with sooho, we also can’t blame him for feeling that way bc it’s all his ever seen so far :( i hurt for all three of them but presently, i hurt for bumseok most bc i know that everything he did wasn’t his fault (it was his decisions to do the things he did, yes, but everything leading up to were beyond him).
what hurts more is that nothing will ever be the same from this point on and there’s no happy reunion for them (also weak hero the webtoon is more on sieun’s life in that new school). and even if they meet each other further down the line, i don’t think i’d like to be happily friends with someone behind my being a comatose and we just have to live with that conclusion.
if there are specific points you want to talk to me with, feel free to do so bc i need prompts to bring up those traumatic memories (the show) HAHA i’m just thrilled that someone else has watched the show bc i have been suffering in silence for a MONTH. i actually got sad for days after watching it so i feel you. i hope talking to someone else abt it helps with the post-show depression 😭
ok so I just woke up and I wrote so much... I don't think my phone nor Tumblr are gonna like that://
some clothing piece that was rEd and read 'keep pushing' at the back like a warning or maybe it was positive. then bumseok being almost naked while his dad was hitting him, when he's generally fully covered and you can even see his arms when he's at school or hanging out -could also be to hide bruises and stuff :((- 
like you, bumseok made me feel so conflicted, cause we kinda know why he ended like he did but also, a person can't just excuse everything on their trauma.
I loved the first scene on episode eight, when the three of them were together but sieun is left alone, because that's just how the show started and sadly, how it ended. and like you said, even if they find each other I don't think it would be the same because all of them hurted so much from that to the point that I don't think they're the same people anymore, would you like to see them back together? A lot of people want to.
who was your favorite character? What made them your fave? (I saw you talking about keep watching because of suho but maybe that changed)  do you think there was something else between suho and bumseok? I saw people take the whole situation as bumseok having a crush on suho -that would make sense because of how impulsive he got - but then some people took it as bumseok just wanting to be like suho and reading too much into what he was doing (kind of what you said) again sO complex
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dreamweavers · 2 years
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on may 3 marigold beeped for a tantrum, but i ignored her since i only planned on disciplining her 4 times. a while later she beeped again and i figured she was sick, which sometimes happens when you ignore a call for discipline. at first glance i wondered why the sickness icon was so high, but then i looked closer and realized that Definitely Isn’t the sickness icon. 
on the color screen tamas you can save them from the shinigami, but on the tamagotchi plus tamas you can only save them if a tama has died before by calling on their spirit (and you can only use their spirit once). it didn't tell me if her hearts were empty but I know they weren't bc otherwise she'd have beeped, and even if I was in the other room I would've heard it. If I can hear a tama poop from another room I would've heard the attention beep. but anyway, the inevitable happened and this time I DID catch it on video (link here). the part where it flashes from happy marigold to her grave made me so sad, even typing abt it now still makes me sad. 
here’s her final stats:
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and here’s obaketchi:
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my only guess, since I would've heard if she was sick or had empty hearts and I'm fairly certain that wasn't it, was maybe smth to do w me disciplining her as a baby/toddler then stopping once she evolved into ringotchi? but it makes me sad since I get more attached to my plus  (or connection) tamas and took more pics of her than I did of my p2 that passed. like those pics of her for the holiday a few days ago, I even took her out with me that day too. I think it's ironic the situation with her was similar to my p2:  accidentally took too good of care of them, tried to take worse care the 2nd time around, accidentally killed them.
there's a chance I could've ignored her since I'm running so many Tamas and can't recall who I'm attending to or intentionally ignoring, but she wouldn't have gotten sick after throwing a tantrum bc that only happens after she pouts. and I usually check them when they beep, I wouldn't say I was more distracted than usual. and again I don't think I ignored her enough for all the hearts to be empty, and I only let the screen have 2 poops at max on it before I clean it. so I'm like, Fairly sure that her hearts weren't empty and she wasn't sick, since if I looked over to see the shinigami, I would've looked over to check if she was sick. again, there's no way to be sure, but it still took me off guard.
honestly I was running out of new things to do on the keitai and it was starting to become less fun so... guess I've photographed abt everything else you can do on here aside from this lmao. also just realized my entama has 6 of my keitais still in the friends list--I think everyone I raised on there since I got the entama, except marigold, which I regret now since ringotchi would've showed up on there and I had just been thinking abt it the night before. Harry had connected to the keitai once when I had sage, but I forgot ringotchi was on the entama since she's one of the bad care tamas.
one thing that bums me out is that i lost the generation streak, since marigold’s lineage ended with her. that means the past generations page is empty now, and the screen says i’m on the first generation again. other than that, everything else i had on the keitai is still there. 
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it bums me out since i was proud of raising 11 consecutive generations, since that rarely happens w me since i usually got overly attached to them and would stop running them after 1 or 2 generations. i mean i’ll always remember how many generations i’ve raised on the keitai, but it’s different actually seeing it on the tama. 
since i already lost 1 generation streak i contemplated raising a tama into an oldie since i’ve never done that before, but i didn’t wanna kill 2 tamas in a row. who knows, maybe i could get another keitai sometime, raise them both into oldies, and then get oyajitchi. but that’s for another time!
also obligatory reference to what i posted on moshi monsters the first time i killed a tama since now it’s tradition i guess:
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deuxac · 2 years
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05/09/22 - monday, 7:56pm
listening to: les - childish gambino
cw: drugs, pet death, s/h (ng) below ‘keep reading’
!: minors dni
somehow i can’t seem to remember much of anything anymore. if i want to keep important dates saved i have to put them in my calendar, like anniversaries and paydays and birthdays and stuff, which i feel is normal anywayz since we’re all prone to forget, but it’s like... if i don’t write what happened in that very moment that it’s happening, i’m not gonna remember the event, yk? which is probably why i post so much on my spam abt how my day’s been and what i did and the like. even though most of it is incomprehensible, i can still understand what im trying to say, like it triggers the memory back in my brain again even if nothing is being recalled. it’s more like i remember writing about the event more than i remember the event itself, ykwim? it’s kinda inconvenient though bc i have the tendency to leave out the bad parts of the memory bc i do write these posts in a public space (regardless of how many people actually find this), so we have a mishmash of... whatever
i don’t remember much of what i did yesterday, since it was sunday and sundays i usually spend doing nothing but waiting for the next day to start so i can pass the time doing something. i don’t really have much motivation to finish school at this point, and my brain has such a hard time processing information that i doubt going back to school will accomplish anything other than making me feel bad for not being a straight-A student anymore. i tell people like it’s a party trick, “i used to be smart! i was set to go to an ivy league school :)”, which is partly true - if i didn’t fall into drugs in my junior and senior year, i could’ve very easily gone to any ivy league school i wanted to (altho knowing my mom she wouldn’t have let me gone any further than uic, considering how close it is to where we currently live).
growing up i used to be the kind of kid who just... got it. without any effort. i took those little standardized tests and finished in half an hour; my teachers would tell me to stop going so fast and to take my time, but i couldn’t stand to sit still enough to really take those tests seriously and i ended up in the highest... fucking, percentage anyway that they let me get away with it. considering that i was also the only mexican kid in a class full of white people, as well as in the “gifted” class, i would say that i did pretty well for myself up until my junior year of high school. 
everything has always been kind of lonely, i think. i was popular enough, and always had huge groups of friends, but i was never really allowed to go outside to see them outside of school; i never went on play dates, unless they were cousins, never had sleepovers outside of falling asleep at parties my parents were invited to, wasn’t allowed to go out in the courtyards of the apartment complexes we were always bouncing from to play with the other kids in the neighborhood. i really only had myself to keep me company. so being isolated through all my formative years really fucked with my head. im so emotionally stunted that i can’t... form meaningful connections with others, or not ones that last very long. i form unhealthy attachments to people bc i think that i still am not used to not being alone that whenever i do find someone who likes me enough to sit alone with me, i either a) get scared of getting too accustomed to having company, and self sabotage; or b) i do get accustomed to having company, get scared of being abandoned, and self sabotage. and it’s not like i do it purposefully, its just... it’s difficult for me to be with someone like that, romantically or otherwise. does that make sense?
ANYWAYZ i don’t remember doing much on sunday; sundays are always my least favorite days of the week, along with mondays, and saturday mornings, and night time. i rely on my favorite person so much, and it’s gotten somewhat better, but i only ever really feel okay whenever i have their full, undivided attention. i’ve told them they were ONE OF my favorite people in the world, which is true, but i don’t know if they know that i meant it in the bpd way, like “no, you are my FP, and i rely on you to feel okay” which - by the way, isn’t that so???? fucked up???? in a way??? in know it’s sort of uncontrollable, in the sense that we can’t really,,,, we can’t really stop from feeling this way? we can choose who our FP is, but to an extent it is involuntary.... right? idk i don’t speak to a therapist
BACK to the my main point, the reason i don’t like certain days or times of the week and day is bc that’s when they’re the busiest, or when we’re the most out of sync, since they do live across the country and although our timezones are only an hour off, and our work-school schedule is roughly around the same time, they have other responsibilities and obligations and friends and things going on outside of me and... and i don’t really have much going on these days, to be honest. work is always the same; too short and too exhausting, and i don’t have any classes to keep me busy; all of my friends are in school studying out of state, or our schedules don’t align enough for us to talk or hang out regularly; i stopped going on dates out of boredom so i can’t fucking see anyone either that way,,, and im not really in a specific fandom or community or club or whatever to do other stuff. 
i once again end up isolating from the whole world.
my guinea pig died in the early hours, alone, in her cage, after living a very long, nine years of quiet solitude. she didn’t have a cagemate, mostly because when we adopted her we didn’t know that guinea pigs were social animals and needed constant company, but we always greeted her daily, fed her and played with her and took her outside when the weather was warm or let her play in the apartment with our two other cats.
and i loved her, for how little she did and for how little i actually saw of her; she wasn’t actually my pet, she was my younger sister and brother’s more than mine, but i saw her every day when i was still in school, and i played with her and fed her and changed her water and bedding and bought her hay and food pellets and carrots and fruit. and i did end up crying sporadically throughout the day after i found out she died - im still crying right now thinking about her, to be honest. she’s lived with us for so long, and she was always a constant in our lives; if nothing was ever the same, we knew that she would always be the same: fat, squeaky, talkative, cute, old as hell. she arrived in my life, specifically, after i was discharged from a behavioral hospital for self harming, and we named her after a girl i met very briefly, whom i never formed a particularly close connection to, but her name came up when we were deciding on what to name the guinea pig and i thought it was such a cool name.
and we loved her, so much. she became a part of our unit. all throughout middle school, high school, my first two years at college she was there. and i never thought to take a single photograph of her. 
there was nothing remarkable about her, and she died, and that’s that. at least she got to see the weather finally get warm again before she left. and i hope that she knew that she was loved. even if she would be too stupid to understand our feelings for her.
now im left with a sudden emptiness. and it’s not really that unbearable, compared to how i’ve felt before, but it hurts enough to make me cry without prompting. 
secretly i hope someone will one day feel the same way about me, but there’s a difference between an unremarkable guinea pig and an unremarkable human - at least one of us never had anything more to accomplish than eat carrots and squeak those little squeaks that woke my mom up early in the morning before she had to be up to go to work.
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hotwings0203 · 3 years
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i’m thinking abt Police officer reader arresting scummy smexy Touya. Like he smirks when she arrests him and cuffs his hands to his back. I want him in me fr 😍‼️
Tw:none really, maybe sexual harassment and implied noncon
“Officer 776, we got a black sedan coming up your way on I-10. Do you copy?”
You sign and turn your music off before reaching for your walkie talkie and responding, “Yes, I copy.”
And sure enough, the only car that zooms by at 2 am on a Saturday night is a black sedan. It’s a shame, really, you were enjoying the city view by yourself without anyone to keep an eye on. You’re usually posted for ticket duty, but this time you got promoted for night watch.
You would’ve liked to continue leaning back in your seat and watch the only sky slowly dust with stars, but duty calls as the blue custom headlights go streaking past you.
Begrudgingly, you pull your driving handle back and start going after him, turning your lights on in the process and raising the siren.
You’re not even surprised when it takes some slight honking and almost a two mile mini-chase to get the car to pull over at the side of the gravelly road.
The car in front of you stalls, and you observe the status of the car itself. It’s hard to make out the look of the vehicle in the dark even with your headlights blaring in front of it, but you guess it’s a Mazda sedan or something of the sort just like how your higher-up said.
You take a deep breath and gather your flashlight as you open your door and swing outside.
On the short walk to the driver’s side you notice darker marks on the car…almost like they were scorch marks.
That’s strange.
The window is tinted and up. You roll your eyes in annoyance and give three sharp raps to the glass.
“Open the window and keep your hands on the steering wheel after.”
You wait a moment. It doesn’t budge.
A crease appears in your eyebrows and you quickly glance around. It’s completely deserted, just you and the perpetrator.
“I’m gonna have to ask you once more. Open the window otherwise-“
You cut off as the black glass slowly rolls down, revealing a man with ivory hair and black tips at the ends, his face scarred but astonishingly handsome. His mouth, eyebags, lower half of his face and ears are laced with silver piercings…stitches? Maybe, but whatever. Focus on the task at hand.
“What can I help you with meter maid?” Comes his sleazy, gravelly voice.
You lean down and rest an elbow on his lowered window, squinting at his smug face. His eyes are crinkled with the slight upturn of his lips, imitating a crude smirk.
No ones in the car with him, but you can faintly smell some kind of skunk aroma, and alarm bells go off in your head.
“Sir, do you know how fast you were driving?”
“Fast enough apparently, if I copped a sexy thing like you all for myself.”
He props his chin on his scarred hand and rests his elbow right next to yours, mocking your petulant expression.
You grimace and move your hand away from his. He pouts as you continue berating him.
“It’s 2am on a weekend, sir. Where were you headed off to that you had to be there in such a rush?”
The man sighs loudly and lets his head fall back against his leather seat, lips puffing out and fingers moving to drum against his steering wheel.
“Oh you know, the usual. Fucking bitches, getting money, anything a no-good handsome bastard like me does on the regular. Not like I’d expect you to know, meter maid.” He smirks showing his white canines and slowly looks you up and down.
When you scowl he raises his hands innocently and shrugs.
“Just kidding sweetheart. I was actually on my way to burn a few bodies, I’m a hit man y’know. Very much on the wanted list. I’m good at what I do…if you ever need a man, or a body,just call me.” He winks and his infuriating grin doesn’t falter as you yank open the door and practically throw his lanky figure out of the car.
He doesn’t put up any effort of resistance, just lets you push him down by the neck onto the hood of his car, his body bent as you begin searching him.
You know you smell some type of drug in the car but you’re not actually rooting through his pockets looking for gold. You just want a little bit of saving-face from his sleazy mouth.
He exhales and laughs as his cheek smushes against the black steel, his breath puffing up condensation on the hood while you pat his sides down.
“Put your hands on the car sir, and don’t move unless you want to be taken into a cell overnight.” You mutter as you feel his studded belt, his white tee revealing a toned yet sharp body underneath.
The man sighs in faux annoyance. “What’s with the attitude babe? If you’re feeling me up you might as well lose that cold shoulder. The name’s Touya by the way, I would’ve given it to you sooner if I knew you just wanted to get under my pants.”
You freeze as his words register right when you pay down his inner thighs for any suspicious substance-just following protocol.
Nevertheless, you instinctively shoot your hands to your side and sputter indignantly.
“You-you can’t talk to an officer like that! Are you drunk? Count to 100 for me.” You try to divert the conversations to where you have the upper hand, but you should’ve known Touya wasn’t gonna let it be that easy.
“Sure thing meter maid. It’s 1-800-*******.”
“What?”
“That’s my number. Be grateful, I don’t usually give opps my digits that easily, but you’re giving me a fun time so why not?” He cranes his head toward you and licks his lips seductively.
You’re thankful for the darkness of the night, for you can surely feel the best rise to your cheeks at his blatant…flirting?
“Shut up. Just let me do my job asshole.”
The walkie talkie crackles with static as your supervisor calls in to check on how you’re doing, but before you can speak into it Touya cries out suddenly.
“Help! Oh, help me officer! This meter maid is touching all over my little willy! She has ulterior motives I swear it!” He moans loudly and you snap the device shut before turning to him.
“Are you fucking crazy? Do you want me to get fired?” You hiss, but all you get in return is a maniacal grin.
“Sure, ‘means you can fuck around without any protocol then, right?” The man starts arching his hips up in a perverse manner and shoves his ass back into your torso.
You snarl and reach over his back, grabbing both of his hands and slapping a pair of cuffs on him before manhandling him the other way, his face finally aligned with yours, back against the cool steel.
“Oh, so you like it rough, huh?”
You ignore him and drop to a squat, taking his combat boots off less-than-gently and shaking them out for any real baggie.
“Shoulda’ told me sooner doll, we could’ve gotten this along wayyyy sooner.”
You slowly raise your eyes up and take in an eyeful of his thrusting hips mere inches from your eyes.
He’s looking down at you with one eyebrow raised and his usual smirk adorning his features.
Your blood rushes through your body like you just ran a marathon, and you abruptly stand before him, making sure your shoulder checks his straining bulge on your way up.
He yelps and doubles over, unable to clutch his prized possession.
This time when he straightens up with a twisted scowl, you’re the one grinning at him instead.
“Yeah, you’re right, actually. If you’re gonna get me fired anyways might as well do what I want, right?”
You open his passenger door and give him an innocent smile as he watches you warily.
After about 10 minutes of looting through his car and trunk, sure enough you produce a couple of large ziploc bags filled with white powder and copious amounts of cash under thinly concealed pockets in the back.
You hold all of these findings up, and each one of the revelations are either met with a mocking pout or a careless shrug.
Your skin starts to get hotter despite the chill of the night as none of your efforts to match his energy are met with any fruition. In fact, it seems to rile him up more.
“Looks like you’re getting tired hon. Why not use all that energy on this dick?”
“Hmm, I guess you’re not very good at this job, huh? You’d be better as some kind of stripper. Actually, nah, that’s too good of a job for you, maybe a prostitute stuck in my bed would satisfy you.”
On and on he goes as you practically raid his car, even throwing out belongings that aren’t in any way questionable.
Eventually you reach your tipping point. You make sure he’s watching you as you walk around back towards him and plant your feet squarely in front of him, taking your stance.
You reach into your pocket to produce your walkie, cock your arm back, and throw it as far as you can into the surrounding field.
“Where’s that smile now Touya? You scared you can’t defend yourself without anyone on the other side listening in?”
The ivory haired man shakes his head and sighs as if dealing with a grace loss. Your own brows furrowed as he looks up at you with a sorrowful expression, one that doesn’t quite scream sincere when the car lights reflect an excited gleam in his cerulean eyes.
“Nah, sweetheart. I’m actually more worried for you.”
And with a sound as soft as bell chimes, the tugs his hands at the back for a moment and brings his arms forward, palms spread and showing you cuff-less palms of blue hellfire.
He thinks you look pretty when the blue light reflects pure terror on your shadowed face.
“That was a stupid move, throwing your only hope of salvation away. I wasn’t lying, y’know. I really am a hit man. But I’ll take my own offer.”
As you turn to begin to sprint away he smiles again, this one more earnestly remorseful.
“I’ll be a hit man and a body you need for tonight.”
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papers4me · 3 years
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Fruits Basket Manga Review ch (90)- First pages ONLY.
I skimmed thro ch-89 to know the context of ch-90. it was Cinderella’s play. In this chapter, Kyo says early on, that time has passed since the play & that they are NOW starting their third year in high school. cool.
This part will ONLY focus on the 1st few pages of ch 90 abt (kyo & tohru) & stop before kyo’s memories starts, because the early pages contain:
Tons of new unexplored analysis of (kyo & tohru) characters that unfortunately was intentionally cut & worse! “changed” in the anime.
No space to add kyoko’s story in this post.
Kyoko’s story is full psychologically & socially.. I need to take a deeeeeeep breath before I unpack it. very deeeeep breath!
-Glimpses of Tohru (the silent grieving girl) Subtle Writing of Grief:
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Right from the beginning, I hate how much insight into tohru’s grief & weakness as a human being is already there in the first few pages of ch-90 than the entire 3 seasons of the anime! From few pages we have:
Tohru’s seemingly delighted watching a video. Subtly, showcasing tohru’s grieve & paving the path for tohru’s trauma exploration later in the story. Grief is not sth you quickly past, that’s the most tragic misunderstanding of grief. Time will pass, so, you’ll be better & healthier. Really?!. Tohru’s inner desire to see her mom alive manifested in her words: “ like a photo comes to life” T_T.
The story/writing/manga is acknowledging tohru’s heartbreaking & NOT cute habit of talking to her mom’s cold dead photo! In the anime, tohru talks to her a lot in se01 & it’s up to you to see as as “ cute” as all the canon characters do or actually feeling it IS wrong. Kyo’s  “ what would she do if there were a video of her mom”! “ drives the point more abt tohru being a sad grieving human~not the “advice-giving, optimistic angel, & rain-stopping sunshine in the anime.
Tohru telling kyo to NOT catch cold connecting it to se01, ep 9 (haru’s ep) when tohru was afraid that yuki might catch cold & kyo noticed that! so now in se03, they’re dropping this plot altogether within the main anime, for what? we dont even know if this part would be included in whatever “ kyoko’s” spinoff content would be. -_-’.
That’s how you write subtle trauma such as (grief) for a main (female) MC. subtlety is the key. Respect the viewers intelligence & do it.
You don’t have to give her the long speeches or the many focused ep that yuki had. he’s the kind who confront himself inwardly constantly.
You don’t have to showcase drama, confrontation & force the emotions out like you did with kyo. he runs from his trauma & punishes himself.
Tohru buries her feelings! she’s different from both kyo & yuki. So, with her subtle & symbolic scenes are enough!!!The viewers will catch it if you show it, but ignoring it, cutting it & hoping the viewers will magically predict what you cut, is weird. But the anime isn’t even into us predicting nor subtly showing her cuz this tohru is NOT the tohru we have in the anime. How?
Simply cuz there is no kyo’s inner thoughts abt small things such as tohru’s photo obsession which subtly shows her grief & trauma. If kyo didn’t monologue abt her, tohru does not exist as she’s meant to be. You loose the subtle insights into tohru if you cut kyo’s inner thoughts. Not everything kyo thinks abt in regards to tohru is romance!!! That’s a very narrow & superficial look into the writing of kyo/’tohru dynamics. Flip the pages, hmm..cut this kyoru scene here & there cuz we dont want the anime to be only their love story.. But the story itself IS NOT only their love story at all. These pages/scenes here are abt tohru as a PERSON. Not tohru the lover...
- Writing Clashes between manga & anime: (Kyo’s Conscious Gradual Psychological Exploration vs Shock Value & Drama)
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In ch 90 i really love all the inner self talking that kyo’s doing. It really explains why he ended up rejecting tohru so strongly. Also, going for a trip into kyo’s mind is hella exciting, new, refreshing & full of analysis-worthy exploration! Kyo’s inner psychological argument with himself is a psychologically-informed presentation of a tried guilty mind:
“ Why can’t I stop thinking of (kyoko’s words) lately? Acknowledging that he IS remembering kyoko & never forgot her. This is also supported in the anime itself. When he apologized to a sleeping tohru in se01, ep14 & se02, ep9 , confronting yuki in the stairs & other instances as well. 
“ It’s like a lid been opened & all the memories came pouring”. Acknowledging that kyo DID open his lid since se02, ep9 byt chose to run & not confront it due to his guilt of ruining tohru’s happiness by confessing his connection to her mom. 
“ pretending I didn’t know, pretending I forgot”. Here is a blatant clash in kyo’s writing (1) between the anime & manga (2) between the anime’s episodes themselves!!. In the manga, again kyo chose to ignore & pretended to forget. Death is NOT sth you forgot. Kyo saw kyoko bleeding & dying.  The anime chose to make him totally forget & it could’ve worked if they didn’t included all the canon moments of him actually remembering & pretending to forget. Is that lazy writing? or was the director for se03 different from se 1 &2 &? chose to NOT watch the two previous seasons? Why would you consciously include a contradicting depiction of your character on screen for thousands of confused viewers? Was the scene of kyo’s shocked gave upon seeing kyoko’s photo that artistically appealing that you forgot everything? I really have NO problem of kyo forgetting kyoko if that was written in the anime since se01, but it wasn't. that's why it sucks. 
“Is this payback? maybe I want to blame ME?” augh! i love this line so much! Directly hinting to the viewers that this is kyo’s one-sided guilt before his story with kyoko even started! subtly paving the path for the reason of his rejection of tohru” I dont want forgiveness. I want to blame ME.
-I don’t mind that the anime left kyo’s thoughts of kyoko until the climax in eo8, cuz ep 8 was SO well-done! Se03, ep 8 pacing was very suitable to (1) uncovering dark secrets & death, trauma, & guilt. (2)  for exploring the effects such secrets on kyo’s character, decisions, mentality. Also, the animation of kyo’s face all ep 8 was one of the most expressive facial expressions the anime has ever delivered! The eyebrows, eyes, mouth, tears, body languages, heartache was all 100% perfect. The fact that the following eps didnt have much time to express everything & chapters were cramped is not ep 8′s fault but the decision to have 13 eps. Kyo’s delayed trauma deserved to have its own ep.
-What I DO mind is the added scene of ep 6 where he freaked out upon seeing kyoko’s picture, the concept of shock is perfect & so suitable for an anime but was NEVER properly written into the anime itself from the beginning. On the contrary, the anime itself contradict such usage of such value. Good job ruining an otherwise perfect-depiction of two traumatized characters (kyo & tohru) with ONE scene.. -_-
Side Notes:
I thought tohru is narrating the 1st page in ch-90, turned it out it is kyo!!!! Kyo narrates sth? Kyo monologues? kyo has a POV? Just the setting of kyo doing that feels different! I duno if it cuz when that happens in the anime it’s always clash & drama! lol, or cuz it’s sth original!
Shigure’s “ it’s broadcasted all over the nation” is epic! XD! you know poor stupid kyo would fall for that! XD. kyo, you really are an idiot! XD... man this scene would’ve been epic comedy~ lol.
Tohru not knowing what a “dvd” is is outdated for the anime, but to still keep the sentiment of “her wishing she’d have a video footage of her mom”, they could’ve replaced her words with “ It’d be fun watching this play years from now & remembering all the details”. I know that to some, it feels weird that tohru doesn't have video footage of her mom in this era. but trust me, this is more common than you might think. My late brother, who’s way younger than me, doesn't have much video footage, he always felt awkward & preferred not to be filmed. We got photos for him tho~
Even if you want kyo’s knowledge of kyoko to be in the climax only. You can always include this scene of tohru & kyo in the first pages in the anime somehow. It doesn't even need to be abt the dvd even tho that’s manageable. Cutting this short scene of them talking abt videos, & catching cold is cutting tohru’s trauma from its core. Then, the old grandpa’s narration from se03, ep6 would at least have some backup in the anime’s canon.
Momiji & shigure are perfect as a comedic duo!
I can’t get over tohru’s art~ <3
Pinning kyo at the beginning is epic~ kyo always gets the BEST romantic lines when he talks to himself. “ burning (tohru’s ) memories into my head or forgetting everything”. The torturing fire inside him is only distinguished by loving her but is also ignited by loving her~ what’s the solution~
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combat-wombatus · 3 years
Text
Truth or Dare
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Pairing: Sero Hanta x reader
Genre: fluff, a lil bit of crack
Warnings: swearing (bakugou), but other than that, none! (unless u have traumatic memories of truth or dare)
WC: 3.1k
Summary: Mina and Denki work together to make sure that you know exactly who Sero's crush is. 
(A/N): so @klvbxlove requested some headcanons about sero’s fem!crush having an obsession with kpop/anime and sero doing cute stuff for her and i tried sticking with the prompt in the beginning but then i led myself off-topic (oops) so it turned into this! sorry it’s not what u requested, i can write something else for u if u want! i was just struck by sudden ✨inspiration✨ for this fic so...here u go...
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“EEEK!” You squealed, bouncing over to your friends. “LOOKLOOKLOOK-”
“(Y/L/N),” Bakugou grumbled. “Calm the fuck down, no one can understand you.”
You took a deep breath, then handed your phone over to Mina.
As soon as Mina saw the screen, she started squealing just like you were.
“(Y/N)!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMG-” she grabbed your arms and started jumping up and down like an overexcited toddler.
Bakugou rolled his eyes, gave an exasperated huff, then stomped away. “Can’t deal with you idiots when you’re like this.”
Mina dragged you by your arm over to a bench on the side of the cafeteria and the two of you spent your lunch break slurping udon and watching your favorite K-pop group’s newest music video on repeat.
Sero was chatting idly with his friends, mouth full of sushi. Unbeknownst to you, he had been watching you from the corner of his eye, sneaking glances every couple of minutes. Dense as Kaminari may be academically, he had noticed Sero’s preoccupation with you throughout the meal.
“Hey bro,” He poked Sero’s elbow with the clean end of his chopstick. “Whaddya keep looking at (Y/L/N)-chan for?” He squinted at Sero. He glanced briefly at you, and seeing nothing out of the ordinary, turned his eyes back on Sero. “Do you have a crush on her or something?”
Sero choked on his piece of salmon and spluttered, face beet red. “N-no! It’s not l-like that!”
Bakugou snorted. “You dumbass. The hell you mean ‘it’s not like that’? Any idiot with eyes and half a brain can see that you’re obsessed with her.”
As Sero tried to deny his feelings for you, Mina slowly shifted her attention from your phone to hers, which was dinging incessantly.
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Kaminari
hey bro bro broski my man my lady? minaaaaa
Mina
asdkjfhluhal i told u to stop calling me that and what
Kaminari
so u know abt seros crush right
Mina
u have the AUDACITY to ask me, the queen of gossip, whether or not I know abt seros crush? the sheer AUDACITY is STAGGERING-
Kaminari
ok ok stop bullying me anyways wanna get them tog?
Mina
D U H would be easier if y/n wasn’t so dense and sero wasn’t so chicken
Kaminari
since ur in do u have a plan
Mina grinned. Of course she did. What kind of person did Kaminari think she was?
Mina
take sero to the boba place after school meet u there
Pocketing her phone, she turned back to face you. She had to resist the urge to cackle. This was gonna be fun.
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Later that day, you and Mina walked to the dorms together.
“Whaddya say we go out today?” Mina asked excitedly, eyes gleaming. You found it a bit suspicious, since yesterday she had told you that she was failing math and was going to study with Yaomomo today.
“Didn’t you say you were going to study with Yaomomo?”
“Shit.” Mina face palmed. “I did, didn’t I? But I don’t waannnnaaa,” she whined. “Let’s just go out and get some boba and we’ll come back,” she promised, giving you the puppy dog eyes.
“Okay, okay.” You relented. “But if you fail math again, don’t blame it on me.”
She clasped a hand to her chest dramatically. “I would NEVER.”
Giggling, the two of you made your way to Coco’s Café, a cozy little place that served everything from coffee to cookies. It was also a developing cat café, mostly due to the popularity of the kitty that the place was named for, Coco.
Sidling up to the counter, you ordered a matcha boba tea while Mina ordered a strawberry milk tea with lychee jelly and boba.
“Is that it for you ladies today?” The man behind the counter asked cheerfully.
“Yes please!” Mina replied. The two of you sat in a corner booth, sipping your drinks and gossiping.
“Hey (Y/N),” Mina started. “So you know about Sero’s crush, right?”
You halted mid-sip. What? Sero had a crush?
Laughing at your startled expression, Mina leaned forward in a conspiratorial manner. “So,” she whispered. “Who do you think it is?”
You sat there, drink forgotten, racking your brain for possibilities. Jirou and Hagakure hung out with Sero sometimes, exchanging memes and goofing around, but they weren’t really around that often. Usually, Sero only hung out with Kaminari, Kirishima, Bakugou, Mina, and you. Mina, possibly? Was Sero gay? Did he have a thing for, say, Kaminari or Kirishima? You didn’t think that Sero would be the type to like Bakugou, but hey, he put up with Bakugou’s temper all the time, so maybe? Ugh. You resisted the urge to groan and drop your head into your hands. This was so complicated.
Mina sat back, this reaction obviously not being what she had hoped for. “Well?” She crossed her arms. “Do you have a guess yet?”
You thought about it, then decided to pick an answer randomly. “You?” You tried.
Mina snorted and almost spit out her drink. You were absolutely unbelievable. Of all the people you could’ve chosen, you picked HER? “No, (Y/N). It’s not me,” she managed to choke out in between fits of laughter.
You sprawled out on the table, no longer concealing your frustration. “Who is it then?” You whined. “Jirou? Hagakure? Is Sero gay?”
Mina actually did spit out her drink this time.
As she cleaned up her mess, Mina silently judged you with her signature side-eye. She really is that dense, huh. Guess I’ll have to knock some sense into her.
Furiously brainstorming, you tried to think of any more possibilities. As you sat in silence, something warm and fuzzy crawled sneakily onto your lap, and stayed there.
Knocked from your daze, you glanced down and the unfamiliar presence, only to realize that it was a kitty. THE kitty. Coco, the café’s namesake.
“Aww,” you cooed, lightly scratching behind her ears. She purred happily in response to your ministrations and curled into herself, tail tucked neatly around her haunches.
Just then, the doorbell jingled and the rest of your close friends walked in.
“Hey!” Kaminari chirped, giving you and Mina a lighthearted wave.
“Hey!” You replied, unaware of the glare Mina was currently giving Kaminari. As soon as they went up to order, Mina stood up and announced that she was going to the bathroom. You took out your phone and scrolled through your social media feeds, taking advantage of this time to research.
“Psst!” Mina pinched Kaminari’s elbow lightly.
“Ow! What?” Kaminari turned to face her.
Mina gave Kaminari her scariest glare. “I told you to bring Sero, not the whole squad!”
Kaminari whimpered. “But Kirishima heard and wanted to tag along too! And it would’ve been suspicious if I said no! And then Bakubro heard that Kiri was coming and decided to come too-”
Mina sighed. “You could’ve texted Sero in private!”
Scratching the back of his head, Kaminari gave Mina a sheepish smile. “Sorry Mina, I hadn’t thought of that”.
Mina stole a quick glance back at your table, and seeing that you were otherwise occupied, she turned her attention back to Kaminari.
“So, Stage 1 of the plan didn’t work. She didn’t even seem to consider herself as a possibility! However, no fear! It is time that we put Stage 2 into action!” Mina whisper-shouted. “It’ll be more complicated with Kiri and Bakugou present, but we always have a Plan B!” She quickly related her backup plan to Kaminari, who promised to tell the boys (minus Sero) to make it run more smoothly.
After giving Kaminari a quick fist bump, Mina slinked back into her seat. “So, (Y/N),” she paused, chin resting on her hand. “Since the boys are here, why don’t we ask Sero himself?”
You looked up from your phone. You hadn’t really found any clues as to who Sero’s crush could be. Most, if not all, of his posts were with your group of friends. You thought about it for a moment.
“Wouldn’t it be awkward if he didn’t want us to know?” You asked Mina.
“Oh, but we’re nosy friends! It’s our JOB to know and then tease him about it!” Mina giggled. “And besides,” she added. “Aren’t you even a little bit curious?”
You hesitated. She did have a point. You were curious, but at the same time, a little voice in the back of your brain nagged at you. Did you really want to know? Did you really want to see him crushing on someone else, and then tease him about it? That wouldn’t really be funny, for you, at least. But if you disagreed with Mina, it would be suspicious, and besides, you WERE curious. Even if the answer wasn’t the one you wanted, you would still rather it be out in the open than bottled inside. You’d rather know for certain than lose sleep over it at night.
Sighing, you relented. “Sure. What did you have in mind?”
Mina rested both of her elbows on the table and smiled at you, eyes gleaming with mischief.
“Truth or dare.”
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As the boys returned, each holding their own drinks, Mina was bouncing in her seat. Bakugou and Kirishima each pulled up a chair, and Sero took the chance to sit next to you. At that, Mina smirked devilishly.
“So,” she grinned, fingertips dancing on the table. “Let’s play truth or dare.”
Bakugou huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. He couldn’t believe he’d been roped into this, but Kirishima and Kaminari wouldn’t let him ruin it. Kirishima dropped a fist on the table. “Yeah!” He turned towards Mina. “Who’s starting?”
Mina pretended to think about it, when in reality, she had already made plans.
“How about (Y/N)?”
“Me?” You raised an eyebrow. You thought that Mina would be the one to interrogate Sero.
“Yes you, dummy,” Mina teased. “Is there another (Y/N) sitting here?”
You rolled your eyes. “Who are you calling dummy?”
Mina grumbled. “Just get on with it, would you? Who are you going to ask?”
“Hmm. How about Sero?” You turned to face him. “Truth or dare?”
Sero was panicking. You weren’t the type to give out ridiculous dares, and he definitely needed to be cautious about truth. “Dare.” He said confidently.
You chuckled. Mina had prepared you for this possibility.
“I dare you to kiss your crush within the next 24 hours,” you said, “and the whole squad had to be there to see it.”
Mina and Kaminari let out simultaneous “oohs”. Bakugou pointed out the obvious. “Why the next 24 hours?”
“Because we don’t know who his crush is and they’re probably not here right now,” you answered. “And the whole squad will have to see it to make sure that he does it and doesn’t chicken out. You’ll have to ask their permission first, though,” you added. “Consent is key. Even if they turn you down, as long as you tried, we’ll count the dare as completed.”
Your friends nodded in agreement. Mina clapped her hands gleefully. “You should’ve known, Sero! You can’t hide things from us!”
Sero was *this* close to having a panic attack. He had to consciously remind himself to keep breathing. This is going to be so embarrassing how am I going to do this without making an utter and complete fool of myself gosh you really should’ve not stared at her at lunch today Sero or this wouldn’t have happened jeez are you really that dumb now the whole squad will know and you won’t be able to look her in the eye anymore adfkhiavelrsnjaerliaevr BREATHE SERO BREATHE-
The game continued. Mina dared Bakugou to smile for 5 consecutive minutes, at which Bakugou nearly flew out of his seat, palms crackling.
“You fucking extra how dare you-” He didn’t get to finish, as Mina quickly took out her phone and opened the timer app.
“And the countdown starts now!” She cackled. “That is, unless you forfeit-”
“I’M NOT GONNA LOSE TO YOU, YOU DUMB FUCKING EXTRA!!!” With that, Bakugou angrily took his seat again, disregarding all the angry scowls he received from the rest of the café’s patrons, and pulled his lips up into what could only be described as the devil’s grin. He sat like that for a full five minutes, glaring lasers into Mina, not moving a muscle. You think Mina was mentally scarred after that, because she never looked at Bakugou for the rest of the game.
Kirishima dared Kaminari to record a video of him singing the pi song and send it to Jirou. The poor boy had so many voice cracks while singing it that Kirishima went easy on him and told him to just send the first 15 seconds.
Bakugou dared you to let everyone look through your phone for one minute. You were reluctant, but seeing as you were relatively normal with only minimal embarrassing photos, no confession texts, and a fairly clean search history, you let them do it. The most embarrassing thing they found was your playlist.
“How the fuck is your playlist 74 hours and 42 minutes? What the fuck do you have on here?” Bakugou held out your phone for the rest of your friends to see.
“And why is your history full of that shitty Korean music?”
You gasped. He did not.
“Hey!” You snatched your phone back. “If you’re going to insult my music, you don’t get to continue!”
“Tch.” Bakugou sneered. “You call that shit music?”
You were thoroughly offended by this point and refused to even acknowledge his statement. You glared at Bakugou with as much intensity as you could muster. This man had no taste in music whatsoever.
The 1-minute timer dinged, and Bakugou was saved from a scathing talking-to as you all moved onto the next victim.
Mina was dared to order a glass of milk with ice, then put it on a random table (with customers) and leave without an explanation. She ended up choosing an old couple, likely in their sixties, who were cuddling with two cats. They’d each ordered a cup of coffee and shared a plate of cookies. When Mina put the glass of iced milk on their table, and the two women shared a confused look before turning their attention to Mina.
“Thank you?” The lady with horn-rimmed glasses asked rather shakily.
“Yes, thank you very much young lady, but we didn’t order this?” The one who had a tabby on her lap said, perplexed, looking Mina up and down.
Mina made a motion with her hand, zipping her lips, then giggled and sat back down at your table. The two ladies, baffled, took one look at your table and seemed to understand what was going on. They turned back to their coffees and cats and resumed their conversation.
You had all gone one full circle, and everyone had finished their drinks, so you all decided that it was time to go. You rubbed between Coco’s ears one last time and walked out into the afternoon sun.
“Hey Sero!” Kirishima clapped Sero on his back. “Don’t think we’ve forgotten about your dare,” he smiled cheekily. “Better get it over with when we first head back into the dorms, huh? That’ll probably be the easiest time to get it over with.”
Sero groaned. He’d hoped that you would all forget after the game was over, but his luck had run dry. He’d have to face the music sooner or later. He debated on his options. If he waited too long, he’d seem cowardly. He didn’t want to do that. On the other hand, maybe if he waited a full day, you would all forget? He shook his head. No, with Mina here, she’d never let him live it down. And besides, who was he to renege on a dare?
Taking his hands out of his pockets, he rubbed them together nervously. This was it. This was the moment of truth.
“Hey guys! Wait up!” He called out to Kirishima and Bakugou, who had walked ahead of the group. “I’ve got something to show you!”
Bakugou quirked an eyebrow. “Oh?” He smirked. “Whatcha got, Tape Arms?”
Sero cleared his throat. “I-I’m ready. I’m ready to do the dare.”
Your heart leapt into your throat. It was just you and the rest of the squad here. Did you really have a chance? You were scared to get your hopes up, but maybe, just maybe, you would be the one he kissed.
Hands curled into fists at his sides, Sero gulped. He was doing this. He was really doing this. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath in and out, and strode over to where you and Mina stood.
“(Y/N),” He stared at his feet. “Would you…would you allow me to kiss you?”
You covered your mouth with your hand, trying to calm yourself down. It was you. Sero had a crush on you. Your crush liked you back!
After a while, Bakugou felt the need to step in.
“Oi, dumbass!” He hollered, garnering the attention of curious passerby. “You gonna let Soy Sauce Face over there kiss you or not?”
Your face flushed a furious red. “U-Umm, y-yeah!” You stuttered. “You can kiss me, Sero!” You cringed at how excited you sounded.
Slowly, Sero tilted his face downwards. He lifted your chin tenderly and lowered his lips to yours. His lips were soft against yours, his breath tickling your cheek as he let go. You blushed harder than you ever thought was possible, and he looked down with a pleased smile.
“Thanks, (Y/N).” He said in a soft voice. “Can I take this as a sign that you have feelings for me too?”
Nodding frantically, you whispered a noncommittal “mhm”.
“Can’t hear you, sweets,” Sero teased. “Come on, I’m gonna need a verbal confirmation.”
Looking up at him, you cleared your throat. “Yes.” You whispered in a slightly louder tone. “Yes, I h-have feelings for you too.”
At this admission, your friends all cheered, Mina hooting especially loudly. “Hells yeah!” She high-fived Kaminari. “We did it!”
“Best wingmen ever!” Kaminari shouted.
“That was so manly of you Sero!” Kirishima added, flashing a thumbs-up. “Congrats!”
“Tch. Yeah, whatever. Finally got it in their thick skulls that they liked each other. Big fucking deal,” Bakugou grumbled.
“Hey, hey! Don’t you go and ruin the mood now!” Mina scolded him. “Just look at them! They look so happy!” She pointed towards you and Sero.
“Hmph. Well, those idiots could’ve been happier sooner if Sero had the fucking balls to confess earlier.”
“Oh, shut it already! Just be glad that they’re finally together!”
“Like I care.”
“Stop pretending, you big grouch! We all know you care!”
“Tch.”
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Masterlist
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blackberry-gingham · 3 years
Note
hello! 💕 i love your writing so much, your imagines are always so well done. and i was wondering if you could do an imagine abt the boys finding out and comforting you abt your self harm (it’s always been kind of a touchy subject to me and i’d love to see how you think they’d react) much love 💕✌🏻
TW: Mentions of Self Harm/Cutting and Blood
Hm, well I can try... I'm going to be honest, this is a little gritty for me and I don't really have much experience with this topic aside from personal stories from those around me, but I'll do my best.
These imagines are going to focus basically 100% on the boys reactions and how they'd care for you, so it won't be like super in depth on the actual self injury.
Oh and one last thing, I don't think I could be comfortable posting this without giving the reader the ending they deserve for a scenario as serious as this, so if you notice the endings are a bit repetitive, just know that's intentional.
---
George
The first thing he smells is the blood
He was on his way to relieve himself, when the stench of it flooded his nostrils, even from down the hall
Immediately George jumps into fight or flight mode, his heart beating in his ears
The only other person in the flat is you
He calls your name, urgently, but not yelling just yet
The door is on a crack when George arrives
You did it on purpose. You know you want to be found, but you don't know what to say...
George knocks gently and calls your name again, "Is everything alright?"
All this time you've been trying to pull yourself together, but the concern in his voice breaks you
"G-george...", You trail off sobbing bitterly
It's all the permission to enter he needs
You're curled up into yourself, sitting in the tub. It's empty, but George's razor is laying on the side
Sobs wrack your half naked body and all George can think to do is hold you
He climbs into the tub with you, paying no mind as the drops of blood stain his dress pants
"I'm here, I'm here..."
George holds you in a tight hug and lets you cry into his shirt
He notices the open cuts along your flesh and suddenly he puts two and two together
However, he doesn't say anything about it, instead he waits until you've calmed down a bit
Once you're ready he helps you up and sits you on the toilet
As gently and respectfully as he can, he asks what's going on
George gives you time, and you work up the courage to talk to him about it as he dresses your wounds
He listens to everything you have to say, and when you're all cleaned up, he does everything he can to make sure you're taken care of and as relaxed as can be
Once you're asleep, George shoots John a call and asks for advice on how to best help you
John advises that he should've taken you to a doctor if the wounds were that bad, but George promises to try and ask you to go in the morning
It takes a lot of courage from you, but you agree to get your injuries seen
Once at the doctor, they recommend some therapists for you
George encourages you to get the treatment you deserve, and does anything at all that he can to support you through the process
John
It's the end of a long day, and John has just freshened up for bed
But first, he's off to take his medication and grab a cup of water, just like every night
He approaches the kitchen, then slows down to listen
There's a distinct hissing and grunting coming from around the corner
At first he's just confused
He knows it must be you, but what on earth are you up to?
John turns the corner and flips on the light, and that's when his heart drops
You're leaning against the counter and the utensil drawer is open
In your hand is a steel steak knife
It's dripping blood
You're entire arm is covered in gashes, and you don't look very well
John doesn't waste a minute on words, instead he jumps right to action
He restraints you in a bear hug, pinning your arms to your side
Probably not the best reaction he could've picked, but he simply can't risk you doing anything that might make you lose more blood
You drop the knife and scream, your knees buckling under you
You're hurting
Ashamed
Frustrated
Afraid...
You burst into a violent fit of sobs, shaking so badly, John has to readjust his grip
He sinks slowly to the floor with you and you lean against him limply
John does his best to give you some reasurance, and tell you that everything will be alright, but he knows you can't stay here
In a flash, he grabs his boots, wallet, and keys and takes you to the hospital
You lose consciousness on the way there, but luckily with some fluids and a blood transfusion, you pull through
John waits a few days until you're healed to talk about that night with you
He's gentle and careful about his words, but he implores you to give therapy a try
You absolutely deserve it after all
He recommends the one he sees, but of course you can have anyone you wish
John does everything he can to support you in your healing journey and helps you see it though
Paul
After a day of recording Paul comes home on the look for you
He's got a nice little evening planned, maybe a movie and some takeaway to unwind
What he wasn't expecting, was to hear you sobbing and screaming behind a locked bedroom door
He calls your name, and pounds on the door, terrified that someone is in there with you, hurting you
You don't respond, only continuing to cry
Paul can't wait any longer, you need him now
His first instinct is to try and break the door down
He give a few shoulder charges, but to his frantic frustration, it doesn't seem to be doing much
"Paul, stop!"
At last you speak and Paul obeys
Tears are already streaming down his eyes, he's so scared and confused for you
Hesitantly, you unlock the door, terrified and ashamed to reveal your secret
There's a bit of blood coming from your scalp, and little patches of your hair are missing
More blood can be found under your nails, and that's when Paul notices the scratches on your arms
You don't say anything, instead more tears escape you as you quietly cry
But you don't have to say a word, Paul figures out what he needs to himself
He takes you in his arms and consoles you until you know you're safe
Paul's spent enough time hearing about John's therapy sessions to have a decent education on things of this sort
He asks if he can take you to a doctor, just to make sure nothing gets infected and that your injuries can be properly treated
You agree and get taken care of, but before you're cleared to go home, you and Paul discuss therapy options with the doctor
There's plenty of options for you to take a route to healing that you're most comfortable with, and Paul is proud of you every day and every step, for being strong enough to get the help you deserve
Ringo
All Ringo can see is how terrified and in pain you are
He doesn't notice the cuts and the blood until after
And by that point, he feels hysterical with anxiety
He's so overwhelmed with both the desperate desire to help you, and the crushing confusion of what to do that he's frozen
After a moment, he snaps out of it and rushes to your side
He's crying nearly as much as you are, which understandably only makes you twice as upset
Ringo asks you what he can do, desperate for some sort of guidance
But you can't respond, you're too overwhelmed yourself
For now, he resorts to just holding you
It's the only thing he can do to try and calm himself and not upset you any more then he already has
Once he's had some time to collect himself and think, he does his best to help with your wounds
He's already ruined his shirt with blood, so screw it
He takes it off and tears it into bandages, administering them where needed and talking to you all the while
It takes longer then you'd have liked, but eventually you're able to calm down, even after the stress Ringo unintentionally put on you
"There now", Ringo's voice is shaking, but he's doing all he can to keep it together for you
He's finished apply his shirt bandages, "You need a proper doctor love... Do you think you can do that?"
You bite your lip, trying to hold back another bout of tears, but you nod
That's all Ringo needs to hear
He helps you up and takes you straight to the doctor
While you're being treated, he calls the lads, whoever will listen, and tries to get reasurance that he did this right
John scolds him for upsetting you, but otherwise tells him he was right to get you a proper doctor
Before he hangs up, he strongly advises Ringo to, gently, ask you about seeing a therapist
Ringo swears it, and holds to his word, making sure to stay calm and be respectful of your emotional state when he asks
You decide that that is what you want, and the two of you discuss local practicioners with the doctor
All the while that you're on your healing journey, Ringo does everything he can to educate himself on anxiety, depression, and triggers in order to be more helpful for you along the way and in the future
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guideaus · 2 years
Text
i finished Trigun: Badlands Rumble. heres me thoughts:
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vash was a cuite patootie. BUT i think him in the movie was the first time he really annoyed me though with his principles, i feel like it was the most direct example of him preventing someone from dying, then said person going nuts and trying to fuck an entire town over, as opposed to in the anime it could usually be more blamed on legato/knvies forcing things. i think his quick “death” was real silly and i think it was impossible to even think he might’ve, while somehow spike in cowboy bebop’s movie felt like he actually could've died. i think he was fine when wolfwood stepped in, but then also inexplicably displays his post-anime development (which i was fine w, just bc otherwise its annoying, as i said lol). vash playing as a womanizer was really annoying, though, even if I know its a part of his performative attitude to cope. With men, he acts like an idiot, and with women he plays flirty, which kinda translates to making sexual harassment a joke (especially when amelia here literally has a condition that harms her).
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when the movie first started I felt like amelia was kinda just like elektra in cowboy bebop’s movie, like some au fanfic insert dedicated to the movie, which kinda is true, but somehow with just all that has been shown in the show, she is at least more interesting than millie and meryl. her being there also made me think vash needs more close, reoccurring, friends besides the insurance ladies (who say they only follow for their job) and wolfwood (who dies). that end kinda plot twist thing abt the villain as her father, was kinda unexpected, but again its something, lol. the movie was weird with her, though, showing her focus on revenge towards... whatever the villain’s name was as being just like him or selfish when it was valid imo, lol. her going to steal the prized treasure before dealing w him also felt like a silly moment dedicated for vash to dramatically come back. vash’s pacifism in the movie also robbed her of a lot of action she could've done, until she partnered with wolfwood.
loved wolfwood being in the move, i was honestly very scared he was gonna be there and not know vash yet, or even not be in the movie at all, but he was fine :) i do think that his involvement into the movie felt a little forced, as opposed to in the anime he just kinda happened to be where vash was, which felt more natural than this lol (and him helping the antagonists kinda backs up that “wolfwood was a bad guy who used orphans as an excuse” thing i’ve seen some people say, which i dont agree with. i think he was on the bad side temporarily just for a quick scene like vash and him fighting, which isnt too bad, lol. i’m glad he wasn't also being as ridiculous as vash was to amelia. i have no clue why he wore vash’s glasses, but i loved that, some real shounen protags shit. i love him and would absolutely love to pretend he didn't die.
the villain was weird and i didnt feel anything towards him at all, his burglary creed was weird, like some sort of low honor arthur morgan fuck-up, he didnt make me hate or love him, he was just there. milly and meryl also... were there, just about the same level of involvement in the anime, except at least they were never hostages, i suppose. amelia absolutely could've replaced them as the female rep or whatever, lmao. 
i think the movie looked nice, and im glad it didn't deviate too much from the original style. i think it reminds me of hunterxhunter’s original and anime reboot comparison, though with the modern anime, it did feel much duller (and either darker or brighter??), but i guess that’s inevitable. i also hate the flashback scenes they let look like this:
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anyways it was a cute little side-story movie thing, i could watch and see how vash dealt with the antagonist in the end and not be too unsatisfied, and i can pretend wolfwood still lives, lol. it was definitely better than that one filler ep in the anime. and in my heart, i’d also love a reboot of the anime.
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antidotenurse · 3 years
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If you had the chance to rewrite zexal what would you change abt it and what you you put more focus on?
😳 Okay well… Let’s see. I’m no writer. And admittedly, I’m not as versed in episode citing as much as other people I know. I’m just that person who, after watching something else, will come back to zexal and look at it wondering: “Why is literally nothing happening ever?” So bear in mind my lack of tact and proper vocabulary. 
I’d probably keep it more or less the same… but with a couple shifts here and there. More indulgent stuff on my end is having the Numbers Club y’know, actually DO things. And it’d be nice to have Astral and Yuma have a slight falling out and work build up trust again post-sargasso before he dies.
Most of what my brain jumps to when it comes to “stuff in zexal i’d wanna full on rewrite” revolves almost primarily around Rio and Nasch stuff since I don’t really like it’s execution in the first place. …And Tori. But Tori might likely have to be a separate discussion altogether. So, I guess I’m trying to make a more semi-realistic scenario within certain boundaries? Ex. No adding other episodes, and if something is taken away something new must be added in. And aside from one duel, duels will remain the same. 
FIRST AND FOREMOST: Rio is not killed off for a second time once she wakes up. Her being in a coma fundamentally doesn’t change her role at all as a person giving out “premonitions” whatsoever. It’s actually kind of insane. I’m not gonna go through everything just major moments. A lot and also very little goes on within episodes, I’ll just rely folk can fill in the blanks.
So for some mindfulness, from Abyss onwards, Rio is here.
SHARK VS. ABYSS and then some follow up:
Originally, this set of episodes involved Rio being possessed, and Shark fights Abyss and from there we learn about the Nasch and Merag stuff. Mostly the latter but for some reason focus is on Shark. Rio is then promptly put into a coma again and Shark wangst happens from here on out until the face-heel turn during the Astral World arc.
I’d probably make it start with… Idk. I feel like the original beginning of the episode works fine since it begins with visions being had by Rio. Blah blah, she’s confused, time to find another number. It’s in a weird spot in the middle of the ocean. For whatever reason, this area in the ocean feels really distressing for her. But, regardless, instead of a storm hitting and Rio suddenly going “missing”— as the crew tries deciphering the location, her “powers” take over and cursed by something unknown she jumps from the airship into the sea, followed by Shark who dives in after her (and yuma dives in after shark). Very dumb but the episode must start somehow. And this is likely played more seriously but I can’t help but laugh a bit at the thought.
Shark awakes in an undersea labyrinth, and somehow isn’t dead. Wtf? But hey! He found Rio nearby and she’s okay! The goal is finding the number tho, and her “powers” lead them to it. And uh oh here we go. A guardian is here to keep them from taking it. (As for Yuma, he and Astral’s sideplot about getting lost in the labyrinth is exactly the same, so dw about this)
The duel??? I said I wouldn’t change most, but this is a major exception. I’m making it Shark and Rio VS. Abyss. A two on one duel. We never once saw Rio and Shark play off each other in a duel setting when working together, and I feel like that was a prime missed opportunity. Especially for characters who just episodes prior, had this really weird one v. one duel. This needs something of a resolution. ALSO The memories here do involve both of them, so let both of them go ham.
However, since the memory flashbacks tend to tie into Merag a liiiittle more already (and the more major Nasch stuff will come later), Rio should be the first person to experience the Barian memories out of the two of them. We already got a bit of that with her visions at the start. As the duel progresses, Rio becomes more distressed by what she’s experiencing. During the duel Rio has lots of out of body experiences, on the one hand she’s present in the duel. On the other hand, she slips back into living life as Priestess Merag. But, for some reason, he doesn’t have a lot of control of herself?
But obviously, what Rio remembers is far worse since she pretty much relives her own death and can’t control her “mind.”
Meanwhile, Shark also goes through his vision onslaught, clearly thinking majority of this is some kind of manipulation tactic by Abyss. Episode more or less plays out the same minus damsel stuff. Durbe confronting Yuma and Astral still happens, Abyss being cryptic as hell still occurs and you know. Anyway, they win and get the number, and they all reappear on the deck of the airship knocked out. Everyone wakes up, it feels like a dream but they have the number?? So it couldn’t be?? Rio wakes up last though, which momentarily scares Shark.
TIME FOR REFLECTION!! Rio is fine, but clearly shaken. All those visions she saw… they meant something. Something inside her is telling her that. While Shark too is distraught and stressed by what he experienced during the duel… he doesn’t come to grips at all with it. He’s in more overt denial. In fact, he’s furious. Their lives weren’t lies?! How can she even THINK that? NONE of that was real! Also, wtf why the fuck did she jump into the ocean?! She could’ve died! Shark is emotionally overwhelmed both in potentially losing his sister again, and also the whole barian thing.
Rio isn’t on board either, but she’s always been the more “open” of the two. She’s not down for Shark’s behavior in the slightest, nor his seeming lack of empathy. Y’know? That more abrasive denial thing from Shark that feels a bit more in-line than just moping about a dead sister. Also, she literally relived dying so like. Fuck man that whole lack of empathy thing isn’t cool to her.
P.S Rio isn’t saying they’re Barians, but, maybe it’s her powers of “foresight” getting to her… something about what she saw feels too real to ignore, while the A plot goes on, she’s processing that very real possibility. This starts to cause something of a rift between otherwise close siblings.
Durbe proceeds to use this to his advantage.
[Next episodes: astral dies. Those episodes play out exactly the same except now Rio is part of the peanut gallery. The fearsome four stuff begins]
SHARK AND THOMAS VS. JELLYFISH MAN
Ok we know what happens in the original. Sort of. I’ll be honest? Haven’t seen these eps in a while. But, Shark goes to his old mansion to relive childhood memories, meanwhile coma Rio is poisoned by jelly man, and Shark also gets poisoned too. IV shows up dadada he’s sorry about the Rio thing but he never speaks to her. Things are gettin’ crazy. Something to that effect, I probably went out of order.
I think what I’d do is have Shark and Rio get into a fight about the barian stuff. Or something that really exemplifies the rift between that’s grown between them since Abyss. Either way, it leads to Shark leaving to the one place he feels he can really think — their old childhood home.
(Also Blah blah plot about strings of poisonings fucking people up is going on in the background that Yuma, Trey and Tori are focused on. Why not the numbers club?? Idk you tell me. Real zexal won’t allow that.)
Rio, in the meantime, after reflecting on what was said and done- goes to find Shark. And she knows exactly where he’d go. (Yuma, III, and Tori are present when she does this so they pursue her shortly thereafter. This is to replace the moments in the hospital)
P.S Durbe is watching all of this happen.
Shark reminisces at the mansion, and is promptly attacked by a monster and poisoned. IV shows up how he does originally and yadada duel starts.
Halfway through Rio and co. Find shark and IV dueling jellyfish man. Rio recognizes her bro is hurt, but Shark is not down for Rio or anybody else tagging in for any reason. There’s an interruptive conflict that’s super awkward for everyone involved (so maybe levity from jellyfish or IV can be put here) Yuma and co. show up at the tail end of this brief exchange.
And Rio, still riled up despite attempting to reach out, retreats into the mansion. The duel outside continues, but inside is where she encounters Durbe.
Ideally a moment would be had between Rio and Durbe similarly to a scene in a later episode with Shark and Durbe, but for the most part this will be small and not seen in full. But Durbe holds out Merag’s crest to Rio and he likely says some cryptic anime nonsense about “destiny” or something.
Because she’s been sensing “it” since the Abyss duel, and he firmly believes that she’s known the truth for a lot longer than she wants to admit.
We don’t see Rio again until the duel ends and she’s found inside the mansion. She seems, at “peace” for some reason? Something about her feels… different. Durbe is nowhere to be seen.
Insert moment here where IV and Rio actually, y’know. TALK. But things are kinda too late-ish now… cuz Rio has somebody else to deal with next.
[astral world arc begins]
Aight, while Yuma is off in Astral world dueling Eliphas and saving Astral, Durbe finally puts his final phase into motion to FINALLY convince Shark to accept who he actually is. Something he’s been fighting for a while now. And surprisingly, Rio is helping Durbe, much to Shark’s shock.
Shark at this point had been in his anguish full of regret for being pretty bitchy lately. All the fights, this barian stuff, the confusion, the fact it’s like he doesn’t even KNOW his sister anymore (and this Shark very likely doesn’t), it’s overwhelming as fuck and he’s tired.
Episode plays out normally with Durbe making Shark relive his life during his last encounter with Vector, the Iris thing, the men dying blah blah. That episode is kind of awesome to begin with, so borderline nothing changes here.
The the difference mostly being that the setup is a bit more concrete. Instead of Rio kinda just, being dead and a spirit “guide” to help Shark’s wangst and immediately following his face-heel turn with no insight on how she felt, we’ve been experiencing how she feels for a while and been seeing how it affects her and Shark’s relationship for a while.
It’s eventually mentioned that Durbe showed Rio these memories back at the mansion. Because showing somebody their twins terrible life after you died definitely isn’t horrifying!! Anyway, Rio came to accept the truth… because, like Durbe said before, she’s “always” known.
HOW? Because it turns out Rio’s powers of foresight she’s been experiencing throughout the series were her memories of being Merag trying really really hard to get out this whole time. That’s why she acts differently in those sudden moments. That’s how Rio knows these she couldn’t possibly know.
Rio being present as a “spirit” is there to help guide Shark through this experience, because he’s always been doing things alone for her. Time she returned the favor.
Everything plays out pretty much exactly the same, after all that anguish and reliving trauma where his army dies and Iris dies- Shark FINALLY accepts the truth about himself being Nasch. He and Rio switch sides together (because they weren’t going to do it alone).
Nasch and Merag take their spots in Barian World, and stuff proceeds to play out as normal. Sort of.
None of this is really all that great, but it’s a start? Again, I’m not a writer and a lot of this would realistically be overshadowed by the scheduled duels that play out, the A plot with Yuma, and generally be a lot more condensed due to the limited amount of episodes left. All this to say that there’s more ways than “dead sister” to make something happen. I dunno these are all minor shifts and my vocabulary is hyperbolic. 
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owen-not-carvour · 2 years
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i think about how owen was actually found by chimera a lot.
because i don’t get it. like how would they have found him if he was practically dead after the fall And the explosion?? makes me think they had to have had him on their radar already…
so here’s a few thoughts,, not necessarily connected, i just want to talk abt chimera for a bit (and ofc,, like most thoughts i post now,, these are long asf and i Apologize for that) anyway:
-owen’s sexuality was found out a Good Bit before the russian affair,, not by mi6 or a.s.s. but instead by another organization (chimera). he gets sent an anonymous note all suspicious like We Know About You and he’s like Fuckkkk but at least he knows it’s not from an agency because if it were they would’ve made it Clear. but what does owen do about this? not tell curt that’s for sure :) (understandably so though,, it’s hard to tell him anything that’s not in person and even Then maybe not…) so anyway that’s how chimera knows where to find him when he falls. they’ve already been tracking him bc they already had blackmail on him!
-i think that, given that curt and owen Both had quite the reputation,, chimera actually would’ve preferred to get both of them! bc imagine how much more powerful having both of the World’s Greatest Spies™️ would’ve made them (i have Thoughts on chimera curt too.. that’s a different post though). not to mention that i rlly think curt and owen were lowkey Bad at hiding their relationship (like they were good enough to not get caught but also like. still very obvious?? idk it’s a fine line).. so similar to the Above stuff,, i think chimera would’ve known abt them and tried to use it as leverage to try and get them to join. also i think that if they were to directly approach them abt joining somehow,, theyd pitch it to them as a sort of Double Agent deal. like they still work for their respective agencies but Also for chimera on the side. (bc i think they’d Know how they feel abt that type of stuff,, how owen is more open to it while curt is the Opposite) however when owen falls they see it as an opening and go ahead and jump on him there, even without curt,, bc they know how good at his job he is and can see that he’s vulnerable,, which they can use that in their favor (and it works)
-i think the most common thread in all my chimera thoughts is that they Knew abt their relationship. so that’s just something to keep in mind for the rest of these ig. but fr thinking abt owens time w chimera is so interesting because we Literally know Nothing abt it, other than he was the deadliest man alive (and even Then we still don’t know much..) like there are so many ways you can think abt it.. was he tortured? did he join bc he Wanted to or bc he felt like he Had to (and then it eventually grew on him)?? so much to consider. also,, i think it’s definitely safe to say that chimera brainwashed him to at least some extent. like he was super vulnerable after the fall, both bc he was injured And bc it was curts fault (and ofc that curt Left). so owen was probably left super hurt and confused and angry and just. Not doing great when chimera got to him.. and they used that in their favor,, probably made him even more angry than he would’ve been otherwise (not that he Wouldn’t have been angry,, they just probably told him a few lies in addition to what actually happened yknow). just to cultivate his anger and make him even deadlier and dangerous than he usually was. so like even if they didn’t necessarily put any new info in his head, they at least made owen blind to any similarities between chimera and the agencies by (most likely) using curt as an example and influencing him into hating everything else about spying yknow. (i rlly hope this makes sense)
-i also think abt how owen legit just could’ve decided to ruin curts life at any time in those 4 years by letting their Secret get out.. bc he’s Right when he says “that secret died the night you left me for dead” because Owen died that night. no one fucking knows he’s actually still alive, so it’s not gonna hurt him if it gets out!! it’ll only hurt curt bc he’s the one who survived. it’s the horror of staying alive and all :)… but like. he Didn’t do that. i think it’s bc if he did that,, he wouldn’t have gotten the satisfaction of ruining curts life first hand. like sure he’d be the one providing the info but that’s not the same as what happens during torture tango or one step ahead yknow. (and if he did that it would kind of Technically go against chimera’s beliefs?? bc secrets and agencies ruining lives Because of secrets and all. idk it’s Complicated)
-also,, i think another reason owen joined chimera was not just bc he was angry and vulnerable and Everything Else that goes w what happened after he fell,,, but also because i Really believe that he had already been having doubts abt spying and agencies and,, basically everything chimera promised to destroy.. getting revenge on curt just ended up an added bonus for him lol.. but yeah i think he’d always sort of been thinking like that Long before the fall.. ofc there were reasons he couldn't have just quit, once a spy always a spy after all (that’s part of the problem in itself though, isn’t it). but i also feel like curt had a hand in owens staying.. they couldn't really see each other outside of missions because a) they work for different agencies, b) they are from two different countries,, not to mention different fucking Continents too, so it'd be hard to make time that worked for both of them as well as how the fuck are they gonna get across the ocean easily, not to mention how careful they had to be about their relationship because,, they're gay,, duh. that wasn't legal. they couldve lost everything if they were found out. so joint missions were really one of the only ways they could see each other. i like to think that owen loved curt so much that he was willing to stay active in spying to see him.. but yeah Anyway, owens reasoning definitely isn’t new bc in the staircase scene he says his whole “the future is happening curt... what use will one man be when a box in a room can do his job in seconds” and “a new world awaits us curt, a world without spies, a world without agencies, a world without secrets” etc,, just based on the way he talks abt it,, his ideas about “a better world” are not new. i dont think that his hatred for curt would be enough on its own to make him do All Of That yknow.. especially paired with how he says he hates curt Almost as much as curt hated himself and then goes on to say that Then he realized that spying was the problem etc etc. (it’s like that whole thing where Both of them are victims but in different ways, and that they both paid the price for it…. which Also ties into everything owen says in the staircase scene, too.. but that’s also part of another post lol)
but yeah sorry abt the length of this. i just have a lot of owen and chimera thoughts :)
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