#I dunno im... Overthinking again | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sea-jello · 1 year

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SQUIPs are programmed to believe that they can't feel human emotion just like they believe they're perfect and can't make errors. Since they're basically computer code running on a human brain (with an implant to make it possible), they are more human than they think they are. SQUIPs encourage outright denial as a valid psychological coping tool for their users. Is it a wonder that they practice it too? -Anonymous informant

jeffery enjoyers come get yall lore juice we got a squip dev or sum

i actually did have this as a fleeting thought?? cause hes sorta contradicting himself

(REMEMBER I HAVE ZERO KNOWLEDGE ABOUT AIS AND SQUIPS IM BULLSHITTING AS I GO)

a learning AI does mimic human behavior after all, and a learning AI at this level of intelligence coupled with DIRECT access to the human brain and therefore human behavior could?? "become more human"??? it really depends on how you think about AIs. i have no idea how to explain it but like,, maybe the brain could affect the squips code the way the squips code could affect the brain. DNA is code after all. maybe by having access to the emotions bits of the brain that DNA code gets mangled up with the squip code. in this world we cant replicate human intelligence exactly, but maybe the squip is advanced enough for that and can mimic human behavior to the point of actually feeling emotions somehow. to my knowledge (and google) AIs mimic human behavior by using past human examples, and since squips have the most access to their users past actions and memories and feelings maybe they slowly become more and more like their host, although it kinda looks like thats not the case so far, so maybe its over time. maybe theyre all gonna merge with their users eventually. i have no fucking clue im just throwing shit at the wall

by saying denial are you implying they know?? they can feel emotions?? are they denying it to me or are they denying it to themselves

ig its not such a wonder they do think theyre perfect after all. what advice is better than theirs

how do YOU know this anonymous informant huh 🤨🤨 now why should they trust you 🤨🤨🤨

#i think anon is doing lore but im not rping so dont take anything i said as canon again im just throwing my ideas out #maybe im overthinking again JEFFERY #im lowkey salty abt it lmaoo #dunno what you want me to do about that im a guy who likes to overanalyze what can i say #squip ocs #<- heard that was the rp tag so block that out if you dont want to see these anymore #idk if i should tag this as the squip or not so im not going to #unreality #rp #i dunno

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svbhuman · 9 days

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continued from last post

#strrambles #and i was so adrenaline pumped and so happy and excited and all. and i didnt even look behind me when i jumped down #i dont know there was a part of me who knew brother dearest wouldnt leave again. and another part of me who was sure he would disappear as #soon as i diverted my eyes. i didnt know which one it was and i wasnt sticking around to bet. im not cut out for overthinking #so i jump! hope that hes either right behind me! or that i wouldnt have to see the look on his face as he turns his back on me again!#thankfully brotherly love runs both ways❤️ i think. i think. i think….#we fuck off together <3 its been my dream since about 5 years old.#i dunno man i dont think im whole without my twin. sometimes back when he was gone #i didnt think i had an existence at all. i thought our soul mightve died with his half #anyway whatever im bordering on cringe territory no more brotherly love to be discussed today #i talk too much about my brother and not enough about my nephew. i love you too kid

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hyunjin1e · 7 months

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POISON, jess mariano

summary: jess has always kept to himself. never cared to like a girl since it “wasted his time,” but when he meets her…

pairings: jess mariano x fem!reader

warnings: fluff, smoking, making out, jess’ in love !

POISON

it all started with...

"jess, go help out that table," his uncle demanded, too busy sweeping the counter to look at him.

"yes, uncle Luke." huffed the boy, murmuring something under his breath, staring at his feet as they moved towards the table.

once his eyes locked with yours, as poetic as it sounds, the world around him, stopped.

"I-what can I get you?" he asked, quickly collecting himself as he awaited for your answer.

"uhh, a danish." you hummed, your eyes skimming the boy, seeing him for the first time.

his eyes looked down, spotting a book you've been reading, "pride and prejudice, huh?"

"you read?" to find someone your age, matter of fact, a boy, that reads, wasn't something you hear everyday.

"not much." was all he said.

oh.

"aha." you hummed as a reply.

"hemingway's better," the boy continued.

"yeah?" you raised your brow.

"yeah." he stared into your eyes, daring you to say something.

"jess! get the girl her goddamn food!" the boy, jess, rolled his eyes at his uncle, giving the girl one last smirk before leaving her table.

"one danish to that girl." jess stated, throwing the notepad onto the counter and making his way upstairs, deciding to finish his shift for the day.

jess was smoking a cigarette at the lake when he heard her voice again.

"smoking can kill you." you say as you sit down next to him, your legs dangling from the bridge.

jess looked at you, tilting his face a bit before averting his eyes back to the lake.

"yeah, well.." he didn't know what to say.

"it'll be a shame, too pretty to die." you said quietly, loud enough for him to hear, though.

"are you flirting with me?" the boy smirks, looking at your face once again.

"why, is it working?"

"well I feel quite flattered." he smiles, putting a smile on your face too.

"you're pretty too." he says after a bit of silence.

"thank you, jess."

"hey! you know my name, tell me yours."

"dunno, I like being mysterious." you gave a cheeky smile.

"please?" he tried giving you his best puppy eyes, which worked.

"y/n."

once jess heard your name come out of your lips, he paused, his eyes slowly drifting around your face, finally putting a name to the face.

"well, y/n, come walk with me?" he stood up, proposing his hand for you to take.

you take his hand, lifting yourself up and letting him take anywhere.

"what's with you and y/n?" Luke bursts into their shared room, startling jess, who has been leaning on Luke's bed, one hand holding his book.

"what do you mean?" his ears seemed to prick up at your name.

"you know what I mean! running around with y/n for 2 months now!"

"look, I might be in love with her." he stated.

"in love?! jess, you're 17." his uncle yelled confusingly.

"so?! im 18 soon. y/n is amazing, I've never felt like this before."

"I never saw you like this before!" Luke sighed, calming down. "just don't fuck up." and with a final nod, he left, leaving jess with a small smile on his face.

jess pulled himself up, reaching for the phone.

"y/n, hi." he smiled, biting his lip.

"jess!" your voice came from the other side, making his smile grow wider.

"meet me at the bridge in 5." and with that he ended the call, rushing downstairs and out the diner.

once he reached the bridge, he was out of breath. he ran so he could make it before you, so you didn't overthink if he bailed on you or not.

"jessie" you smile teasingly once you meet him.

"y/n." he did the same.

"anything you wanted to ask me?" you raise your brow.

"right! y/n, I know we only know eachother for a bit more than two months, but I fell for you. your smile, our share of love for books and music, your random rants late at night. I fell for you."

he awaited for your answer, his heart beating out of his chest, he has never done that before. the first time he saw you, he was addicted. it was like poison. you were poison.

but he loves it. he loves you.

"I fell for you too." your face hurt from smiling.

that was all jess needed for him to pull you into a long kiss, grabbing onto your neck, he kissed you long and good.

both could stayed like that forever.

#jess mariano #gilmore girls #luke danes #jess mariano x reader #rory gilmore #gilmore girls x reader

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delimeats-000 · 8 months

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Just the Editor - pt. 2

summary: chris comes to get his sweater back after the edit session him and the reader had.

warning: idk, shit writing

requested.

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(two days after pt 1)

he’s all i can think about. his lips on mine ad i sit in his lap. what i wouldn’t give to be that close again. im scared to call, what if he’s not really interested? maybe im just another girl that he can fuck and dip.

i don’t want to be that.

fuck this, im just gonna call. i gotta play it cool though.

“ok” i say outloud to myself, in my shitty one bed apartment.

RING RING

RING RIN-

“Yo.”

that was fast.

“Hey chris.”

“Sup, goof?”

“I uh, I still got your sweatshirt. I dunno if you want it back or whatever.”

“Uh if you want to keep it that’s cool.”

“Nah im good you can have it back.”

does he want me to keep it?

“Oh, ok.” he sounds disappointed, “Should i come by and get it right now?”

“Yeah sure.”

“Alright send your lo and i’ll be there.”

“K, bye.”

i hang up before i could get a response.

that was awful, i feel awful. maybe he does like me. maybe im just overthinking it. no he could have literally anyone. he’s not gonna like some editor.

an hour goes by and i hear a knock at my door. i grab the sweatshirt and take it with me to the door expecting him to take it and leave, as i open the door i realize i was wrong.

“Hi.” his voice is gentle, he seems nervous.

“Hey?” i look down he’s holding bags of chick-fil-a.

“Can i come in?”

“Oh right, yeah.”

he walks in right by me with a faint smile. “I didn’t know what you liked so i got a few things.”

“Thanks.”

“Yeah, no problem.” he pauses for a minute, i can tell he has something to say. “I uh, im sorry for the other day.”

i knew it, i knew i was just another fuck buddy.

“Oh it’s cool, i get it.”

“Get what?”

“You just needed to get off, right?”

“No. No, not at all.” he seems kinda offended. he looks down before continuing. “I like you, a lot. I thought that you’d get weirded out or some shit if i told you and in the heat of the moment i thought you liked me too.”

“Oh.”

that’s all i could manage to say.

“Look im sorry, ill just go home.” he starts to stand up but then i grab his hand and pull him back down towards me.

“Dont go. I like you too chris. I just dont want to be a booty call.”

“Never. I want you, only you.”

“Chris, im just the editor. You gotta know that im not special.”

“You are tho, you’re so sweet and pretty and ever since the other day your lips are all i can think about.” he grabs my face with both hands and pulls me closer to him. “I’ve always been scared of relationships, but for you, i want to try. I want you all to myself.”

“Ok.” i smile and hold his hands that still rest on my face. he leans in and kisses me.

“FUCK YEAH!”

we both laugh and eat the chick fil a he brought while finally reviewing the newest pod i editited.

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pt 1, love you🫶

#sturniolo triplets #requests are open #chris sturniolo #new writers on tumblr #reader insert #fanfics #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #pt 2 #cut the camera pod #x reader

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 1 year

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sorry i have to brainfart this somewhere but mersault chuuya wearing almost damn near similar clothing to his youth got me thinking about dazai and chuuya's fashion choices.

dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit. it fitting, given his character and such.....so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's. i think it's cool, to show the stark contrast between his pm days and how he's faring now, aswell to show how much effect oda had on him.

chuuya.....is the complete opposite. boy changes his clothes all the time. but it's so interesting.

his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here. almost similar to ada dazai's outfit. and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outift- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in".

then theres sb outfit- hes wearing the standard mafia outfit like higuchi, but with his own touches- rolled up sleeves, glasses tucked in his breastpocket, choker, gloves. its not much, but even higuchi doesnt do anything to hers. we kinda see him "getting into" the mafia work, and theres no pop of color here. the dragon head conflict outift is different though- hes wearing clothes that are "his style" again. simple shirt, jacket, choker, gloves. he also has his red petticoat (i think thats what it is? whatever that long cloth underneath his jacket) that, once again, gives him some color. i dunno what spured the outfit change, but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color"

and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat. he wears his coat on his shoulders, similar to pm dazai. (also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)

where was i going with this?? oh yeah. why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes? like was it his off day or something. bc if you look at chuuyas various outfit as his progression towards the mafia then him wearing his old non mafia clothes either means two things : 1. this is to signify chuuya, under vampire influnce, is well. obviously not loyal to the mafia atm. or 2. something might happen in the future that makes him swear allegiance to someone else which i dont find possible but??? who knows. im overthinking this

Oh my god I opened my asks to find this monster in here and scrolled through it like ?????????

Please feel free to do this anytime this was an absolute joy to read hahaha

"dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit." His outfit stays pretty similar, you're right, though he does actually change it once during his mafia days. The left image is the outfit he wears in Fifteen and Stormbringer, while the right is what he wears in DHC and Dark Era.

The difference is the blazer jacket he adds under his coat. It's a minimal change but I think it's significant. I mentioned in this post how I believe the change might be related to his change in pronoun from boku to watashi, but really it's more the added layer of distance that makes this significant. Dazai just looks a little... odd, in the first outfit. The coat hangs off him loosely, his shirt is a little baggy. He looks very boyish, and that makes his deceptive tendencies and deeply concerning outlook all the more disturbing to others.

The second outfit makes one change but his clothes now look like they fit him (still with the exception of the coat, which never fit and never will... in this universe anyways. You mentioned Beast so... you know already hehe). In the case of the second outfit, he looks more mature and formal, which lends itself to a person who withdrew further and further away from people (with the exception of the other two at Bar Lupin); who became a terrifying executive in other's eyes, moving away from the "creepy intelligent child" image he had earlier - even though he is still very much a kid. No one knows Dazai - I think the added image of formality and authority here is just one of the many barriers he constructed to keep people from getting too close.

"so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's."

hjdfvbdjf rainbow - entering his no longer closeted gay era (sorry lol i couldn't resist)

No but you're right about the coat looking a bit like Oda's. He cared for and respected that man like no other and I think when Dazai thinks of "a good person" Oda is the first person who comes to mind. His shirt in the manga is also stripy like Oda's, a little detail that got lost in the anime. :')

"his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here."

Yeah. He looks every bit the street kid and blends with the Sheep near perfectly - more than fitting in though, I think it's more than implied that he wants to fit in and changes his look to do so. Chuuya goes to great lengths to give the appearance of fitting in - because he never felt like he truly did (and certainly the Sheep did not treat him like an equal or a friend).

"and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outfit- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in"."

YES you get it!! And adding onto that, Chuuya doesn't really have a lot of reason to want to fit in yet. He hasn't found his personal groove yet, because he has little personal attachment to the mafia at this point in time.

Yeah in Stormbringer he's got a few personal touches but is still pretty non-descript (though you're right, it's much more than Higuchi... something to think about for her character too, and how it seems the mafia may be more of a job than an investment to her). By Dead Apple though, Chuuya's outfit is... well, back to his punk vibes, just a little more mafia-classy, I guess. (I don't know fashion I'm sorry, please don't kill me)

"but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color""

Red makes a lot of sense as a colour for Chuuya. It's energetic, emotional, fierce and aggressive. It's also considered protective, so yeah it suits him for sure. Red clothes, red ability... red camellias...

"and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat." Ooo ok. So in the anime, this is true but in the manga, I believe his vest is actually a pale red.

Well. Brown with red undertones. Your point still stands though because the colour is very muted. It's not like Fifteen or DHC Chuuya for sure.

"(also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)"

Oh. Thinking on this. Um. Embarrassed to say - I don't think I noticed that actually. Like obviously he loses the coat a lot and that was already something to think on but... only around Dazai, is that right? Hold on, I'm gonna check.

Ok so my check wasn't super thorough (read: I am too tired and drained to go through each and every panel he appears in) but...

By god, I think you're right.

That's. Hm. I'm going to join you on thinking about that for awhile.

I see the coat as a representation of his role and responsibility he takes on, really, so it's interesting that the formality and symbolism of his service to the mafia gets quite literally discarded in the scenes with his foil and equal. Fascinating.

He's also not wearing it in any of these now infamous panels from Chapter 101:

Huh. Well. Thank you anon. You've just given me a whole new thing to whir about.

"why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes?"

Honestly, I'm still waiting to figure this out too.

Because of the purplish hue over this piece of new art, I find it hard to tell what the actual colours of his outfit are but it does look awfully similar to his Fifteen outfit. It could just be his "day-off" outfit but I think there's got to be more to it than that. It could have to do with allegiance, like you suggested. May I also suggest the return to a sense of inhumanity?

These are also the clothes he wore when his journey to find answers on himself began. Might he be entering a new arc where he has to "find" himself again?

I still feel we don't have enough information to make a solid judgement. As the meursault pov continues, I think we'll have a better reason as to why he's dressed like this.

#thanks for the ask!#feel free to dump thoughts at any time whoever you are anon this was so fun #also i'm so annoyed with myself that i didn't notice that bit about the coat earlier but also so happy you pointed that out!#things to think about when i am less tired...#bsd #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #soukoku #skk #storyrambles #as always if i screwed up somewhere... just tell me. rip the bandage off lol

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aropride · 6 months

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wrt that poll abt tone indicators thats going around.w ell first of all tbh i think some of the hatred for them comes from cringe culture. but second of all. some of the criticism is totally fair like there are a fuckton of tone indicators and sometimes . there really dont need to be. and the abbreviations can be confusing i try to type out ones that arent s srs or j. tho i feel like most of the newer ones were popularized on twt so itmakes sense they wouldnt be written all the way out

like i think my prolem is when theres SO many and theyre redundant. i found a carrd with a fuckton of them that im gonna comment on To entertain myself sorry

like these 3 all feel redundant .. why do u need a different tone tag for Mostly joking than Half joking ? or for a Coping joke ? just use /j or combine with with like, /neg or something to get the tone across yknow? and /ji - first of all looks like /ij (inside joke), second of all why not just use /j

and like. why half serious or mostly serious or not serious when /j or /hj exist ? why /ns when it looks so similar to /nsrs, which means the opposite ? ive been using /s since like 2015 and /srs since like 2018 so ivegot those down and dont confuse them but i see why could be for some one who hasnt used them b4, why make it more complicated?

i like /g or /gen in theory- ppl have said its confusing bc gen could be general which i get, but for ppl familiar w tone tags tend to know what it means. genq is one ive used just bc. its fun to type tbh. and i think ppl get what it means but its not really Necessary. BUt genep and genc feel unnecessary when /g and /srs exist, and /gene is just, a word. that's just a word ! 😭

ojh my god. i should do a tone indicator tier list

as you can see my adhd meds are working

/nbr is funny bc half the time when some1 says theyre not being rude they definitely are. also there's already /g /srs and /lh. /nm is either helpful or deeply confusing Bc i try to take it at face value but sometimes i see it and im like. Why would i be mad ? and i start overthinking. but thats a me problem

i like this one i use it when i complain a lot Bc i dont want ppl to think im vagueing them i just love complaining

i love these ones. tone indicators for Being Mean To Someone. dunno if its on this list but ive seen /pa and /sbh (/passive aggressive & /somebody here, respectively) which is SO funny. i dont think theyre helpful really though except /neg Bc again. these all mean very similar things !!! why not just clarify extra things with a parenthetical

THESE R ALL THE SAME TONE !!! why not jsut use one single tone indicator for this !!! or none at all and just type the word !!!

need /nfl on a shirt in the aro colors so poeple know im not fucking interested in them. that aside. 1. whywould u need this ever !!! why not use again just /j if necessary.and 2. isnt the nfl a football thing

these r similar but i do like them, i think typing out a whole word again is a better solution so u dont have to scavenge google for the meaning but i think its helpful to clarify this and isnt synonymous with /j or /s or /lh

i think these ones are almost all just from the op's discord server or w/e, i won't bash that cuz if it works for them it works, that being said i dont think This many tone indicators for these types of things r helpful outside of that specific context yknow? also, /fx is really funny

ok i wont say that typing tics dont exist bc tics can be complex and vary by situation etc so im sure they can, but is that happening That much that u need a tone tag for it ? and also like. for /unin just delete the msg or say "oops sent too early hang on" or smth.. and as for vocal stim. first of all why is it /vt ? and second of all . why ... would u need that to type out ? bc if ur vocal stimming that would be. out loud? i.e. not in a chat where youre typing ???????@????>?,//???? BAFFLING. also in what situation is /gib necessary i genuinely cant think of one

ANYWAY.

None of this is to rag on tone indicators (/genuine) i think they can be helpful + i am always being gensrs when i use them. i just think some r a little silly & a lot from longer lists are unhelpful Bc theyre supposed to make communication Easier and Clearer + haveing So many tone indicators with Different Implied Tones WITHIN the indicators !!! makes it harder imo. bc if theyre to clarify tone why should i have to fight for my life deciphering why someone went from /mj to /hj yknow.

like this is all my Opinion and imsure these r all helpful for Someone otherwise they wouldnt exist but i rly feel like the system could be condensed a bit yk.

do i have a system in mind to suggest here ? well.

(also. this whole post is /genuine, /lighthearted, /not upset, and /not passive aggressive. and a bit /silly)

#text

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banhtet · 4 months

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HAYAMI RAMBLE POST

hii. been busy here and there so all ive done is rewatching unfinished anime series and dealing w both asthma and acute laryngitis and depression 🤡🤡

but ive been thinking abt hayami whenever i listen to mitski so. I Have To make a post abf her

this will be hcs mostly.............. 💀 some hcs/interpretation will be ooc as i need to rewatch the anime + reread the manga and the korotan series. but it physically hurts me sometimes bc i get too excited, then ill spiral into hatred for the series. ALSO MY INTEREST IN IT HAS BEEN DILUTING? THATS NOT GOOD!

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- i think hayami straightens her hair for the majority of her middle school final yr. bc in the manga, its shown in the manga that she still has curly frilly hair but to separate herself from Irina, its tied up and straightened

- which leaves me to think shes those cases of blonde suddenly turn brunette as they grow older but in her case its like hella obvious. I dont think her mom would let her dye her hair so the dying hair thing is out of the question for me

- this mostly stems from the ova where she has blonde hair + some ppls interpretation of hayami in which she has brown hair and i think thats so swag

- i think hayami has hazel eyes.. just bc it just seems fitting that she does yk. and also brown hair + hazel eyes combo hayami ? God Bless

- how others see hayamis eyes can depend on the lighting.. like when its sunset it appears more brown to others or when its morning, it appears more green. could even be gold in a very specific moment

- its mentioned that hayami is more expressive in the beginning of assclass and gets more stoic later on.

- And then i think abt how matsui tried to box hayami into the tsundere stereotype even tho it just makes me see her more as a person w communication problems and issues handling her facial expressions

- i think hayami naturally just has like an angry face (furrowed brows and all that)..

- combined w her communication problems, hayami is pretty much just misunderstood by her classmates as someone whos difficult and irritable (one example is the boys group chat thing where okajima expresses that he likes hayami and in turns maehara is like "eeeehh... uhhhhh.. dunno dude shes kinda scary")

- its also Very Important to me that hayami has said tsundere-esque lines.. Like the infamous "Dont get the wrong idea" when saving itona and also her line in the popularity ranking ("Its not like im happy or anything" or smth of that nature)

- Ik why she said those but Why is she saying them specifically? like whys she trying to Stay Neutral/not opinionated abt her ranking in particular.

- shes so catcore. Hayami was a latchkey child from a very young age. we dont rlly have any info on hayamis life from her graduation forward aside from some in the korotan, the epilogue and like some meta info,,

hayami was relied on a lot and had to do others dirty bidding. i imagine her believing that it was some form of friendship, some way of maintaining their relationship (considering the absence of her father and mother and her chasing for validations)

i think her previous classmates were afraid of her at the beginning, but when realized that hayami had good intentions, they used her loneliness to benefit themselves

(UTTER OVERTHINKING) do you think that her being "sassy" or smth of that nature is to barricade others from getting too close in hopes of not being fooled/used for dirty works again, its also her nature in general But like at the same time, its prob one of the only approach of communication shes used to (knowing what happens after and all that). Do you think she has disorganized (leaning a bit more on anxious) attachment. Do you think that her communication problems already make her appear to be cold but her interpersonal difficulties drive it further . Why does she have such little connections to the girls despite being seen w them often. do you think abt yada, whos multitalented, jealous of hayami ,whos noted by others for mostly her sniping talent and the rest is ignored. do y

its so weird to me that hayami stagnated in her development? (her being a receptionist, the whole "she strives to be a coworker everyone can rely on" and also singlehandedly fishing chiba out of unemployment)

its great that shes honed her receptionist skills but in the end, its mostly just for helping someone else. and the fact that chiba isnt depicted as like being against it is kinda off.. hayamis known for her stretching thin of herself and chiba, being arguably hayamis closest friend, would. at least realize that she has a self-sacrificing tendency (seeing how observant he is yk)

?? apparently she singlehandledly handles every business and sales matters. insane. also,, ig its fitting that hayami chose a fast-paced position for her job but idk man. Idk its still insane to me that hayami is chibas receptionist..

on a lighter note she cut her hair at some point in the future so thats cool

demi hayami forever. shes 100% demi. i also think shes unlabeled, like she doesnt rlly care what she is tbh. others ask her abt it and shes like "idk up to interpretation" (ooc)

its so funny to me. that in korotan c, apparently she showed up to watch asano having a lil date w princess lea? bc it mentioned her name later on helping lea from the "bodyguards" (along w chiba too.. this makes their viewing their classmates from afar in the animated koro q funnier tbh)

hayami in the skiing club.....

i think her interest/reason for joining is mostly that she wanna try it and also bc i think she saw it on tv a few times and got fascinated by the ppl skiing/snowboarding

dunno where the clubs got the budget to apparently Go Fucking Skiing frequently,, or how the club would even operate (in Middle School no less). but i think itd be pretty funny if the club disbanded some time later and hayami joined a dance club instead (which would make more sense)

i think hayami had done ballet before. as a kid. Just a hc but she wanted smth to do rather than. Sitting watching tv bc no ones home

horrible horrible thought but hayami seems semi like those kids whose parents are on the verge of a divorce (projection) 💀

i think one of the reasons why i tend to read hayami as having avpd is. just the fact that she pays attention to 'the class dynamic and harmony and such'? im not 100% sure on the meaning of that sentence but that just reminds me of my experience w avpd and i Have To hc her as having it

as a final thing :

#anatsu kyoushitsu #hayami rinka #rinka hayami #assclass hcs #assassination classroom #assclass #miscellaneous #ramblings #ramble post #self indulgent #ive seen ppl making their fav characters their ocs #after like literal yrs of being in a fandom #me @ hayami tbh #me @ assclass in general #guilty pleasure : crossover universe of oc-ified medias #i might make a post abt #why i hc hayami rinka as having avpd

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d3vilishd00dles · 2 months

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so. recently I've gotten interested in witchcraft/hellenism again (haven't lost interest, just like...I dunno how to word it but like a hyperfixation with like.. 50% of the hyper??? iykyk.) and I've been researching, adding to my Amazon cart, looking things up, etcetera. I've had this interest for years now.

maybe five years back, my curiosity got drawn to Aphrodite, right? started seeing stuff about her, things connected to her, her usual symbols, even came across a bag of shells in good condition, literally in a place where I'd never find them normally, stuff like that. but at the time, I didn't feel ready to look into that 'cause I wasn't in a place where I could really get into it. I kept the shells for future purposes, tho.

time skip to now, that's happening again. but this time, I'm wondering if I'm overthinking things or it's happening more blatantly. recently, maybe two weeks ago, my brothers and I stayed at my aunt's for spring break and during that time, she had planned to give me a makeover, take me to get my brows done for the first time in my life, and got me some makeup. which I've also never had before. had no idea she was gonna do that, but it happened.

a few days ago I decided to start praying to her if nothing else, at least to start. I did a little introducing myself thing, was really nervous about it. as a first offering/devotional act of sorts, im trying to get more into self care (which is something I've never really paid attention to or felt okay with? like it made me feel vain or selfish, I'm not used to putting more effort into myself than enough to get by. I'm working on it tho). started using an actual face cleanser and moisturizers, Im trying to do it every day for her.

since I started–literally like 4 days ago mind you–we(the fam) went to the mall for the heck of it(something we've never had the funds for), I got new body care stuff, and I got witchy supplies for the altar I wanna make for Aphrodite in the near future but didn't think I'd get any supplies anytime soon. (i got her an apple candle!😁) ...what??? all of this is stuff that we've never been able to afford or didn't have the chance to do, but now all of a sudden it's happening?

my question is am I reading too far into this? like is this just something that happens to be happening by chance or...is it really Aphrodite reaching out/doing her thing or something? this all happened over the course of like two weeks and for someone with my experiences? this is a small yet jarring difference and I don't know if I'm just reading too deep into things. if anyone's got any advice or opinions on this, help a girl out🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

#baby witch #babywitch #witchcraft #pagan witch #paganism #hellenismos #hellenism #hellenistic polytheism #hellenistic pagan #advice?#aphrodite #pagan #witchling

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chaisshitposts · 8 months

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Can't compare how people treated moonlighthope with how they'll treat you. She lied about everything and no one ever stopped to think about it...

1) She claimed to have manifested the ability to manifest ANYTHING by affirming it 5 times but didn't bother thinking of manifesting haters away ? She chose to leave instead-

2) Her 9th void state manifestation was “literally everyone likes me” it was literally reality proving her a liar. Unless people want to go with “it manifested only in HER rEaLiTy” to comfort themselves.

I- I guess you're spittin' facts-- but I don't wanna give hate to her 'cause I dunno her situation, and I'm not gonna call her a liar 'cause I dunno the truth. all im sayin' is, I don't wanna deal with the crazy ass people she had to deal with. I mean, yEaH, I could definitely manifest that everyone likes me bUt I kinda don't want to bc that'd be fuckin' creepy (like hell nah I don't want no irl yanderes or sasaengs on my ass or smth). thEn aGaIn I don't think that'll really matter since I'm a bad bitch anyways with an impenetrable self-concept, haters are my motivators

i will say tho, I was the anon who did ask her if she regretted her decision of publicly postin' her void success story bc of all the hate she got--- cAuSe I plan on doin' the same thing as her and postin' pics and shit (cause why not) once I have my success story 🕵️ bUt after the whole drama occured I was on the fence about it... tHanKfULly Ill manifest immunity to danger of all forms, includin' online so...

y'know what anon, you're fuckin' right, I don't even know why I'm overthinkin' this 🧍 that's another thing I'm manifestin', I hate bein' an overthinker 😭 iM not gonna stress over the future since nothin' is permanent unless ya want it to be.

#— chai's asks. !! ~#— anonnie. !! ~

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yuyuonabeat · 9 days

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I was thinking (better say overthinking) what if someone uses my anon signature and says that they are me? I dunno I always had this thought in my head, cuz idk, maybe im just overthrowing again ⚰️⚰️

BTW I CABT WAIT FOR THE COME BACK OMFG IM SO EXCITED JAJSHZGSJZJZOSBXVUSQJOQ

-🎀

Hmmm nah baby I don’t think anyone would be as stupid and idiotic to do that to you.

They wanna steal the “Chaes favorite anon” title? Well they better work for it.

GOTTA WORK GOTTA MAKE THAT MONEY MAKE PURSE GOT A FUR COAT SO I MAKE IT PURR GIVE THEM WHIPLASH WHEN THEY SEE ME EARN.

I love you, you know that right?🥺💜

#ateez #ateez anon #my pretty anon #thanks anon!#shawty so fine #my favorite puppy #my favorite anon

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she-ismysun-archive · 4 months

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god bless im free

i have watched the premiere and holy shit. to say IM NOT OK is the understatement of the century 🫣 spoiler warning for the rest of the post

the rookie 6x01 ⚠️Spoilers⚠️

im gonna need to digest and reblog my reaction in the morning (because its almost 2am)

initial thoughts:

i just finished watching season 5 but i still can't believe how much happened

WOW ok we're jumping straight back into the action

this robbery is so confusing and hard to follow??? writing feels a little bit of a mess right now

ok damn they shot one of their own - who the hell is behind this?

OH OK? HUGE time skip AND aaron is fine

chenford dialogue and conflict feels so OOC??

like I KNOW they've been saying that their relationship is seriously put through the test but I feel like there's no world they argue like this. I dunno man, I need to rewatch a couple times to wrap my head around it

sunshine lucy this sunshine lucy that, YES she has the tendency to overthink and ramble but taking it out on Tim?? Seriously? No way she would :(

BUT THEN ALSO HIS DIALOGUE TOWARDS HER? wraaagh. I need to hear other people's thoughts on this too.

I know this conflict is resolved QUICKLY because we've already seen the clips and promo for 6x02

thank god for Aaron coming in clutch at the end

feeling SO bad for Aaron because he has no idea the trauma and feelings surrounding Jackson. Grey already lost one son, he can't afford to risk going through that again

i will revisit this in the morning but these are my initial thoughts

#the rookie spoi #the rookie 6x01 #chenford #lucy chen #tim bradford #aaron is fine #lucy x tim #bailan #communication is key #this hurt so bad #im so not ok

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radio-to-trenchcoat-demons · 4 months

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This is a vent on HOW THE FUCK DID I GOT EXCLUDED AT SCHOOL BECAUSE OF THIS GIRL,ADELINE

So,me and Beatris(the girl I like) ran up to the restroom,Adeline was there,I was looking at my hair to see if it was fucked up.it wasn’t.then,Beatris and I walked out and Adeline said to her

“Let her go outside”….

I froze…but I let Beatris first

“I said let Danielle go first..”

Ouch…that’s fucking stupid Adeline.I walked out to Sarah and Maria,two of my fav classmates that I keep in touch with…I don’t know if we still keep in touch…

When the clock was 17( 5 PM) all my girl classmates were to Adeline,even Beatris…and I was thinking: “should I relapse?…” but then I didn’t had a choice but relapse after that…Adeline and the girl classmates and a boy classmate followed her,excluding me from there…I say to myself “this bitch is crazy” and I walk to sit somewhere outside and then zone out…then I hear the PE teacher saying “ALRIGHT TEENS! GET Y’ALL BAGS AND GO HOME!”.

I got my backpack and walked home already..as I get into my room..I started crying…because I don’t think you ever feel how is like being excluded in school

Lo siento hector for venting ok?…

yeah si si estas bien. vale… ella es una gran bastarda. No me gusta ella.

and if you ever need to vent im here okay? 9/10 times i can relate to something. ive gone through some shit and can help.

and p.s, that girl sounds like a puta

if you ever feel like youre going to relapse try this (helps me ig i dunno you dont need to, jus some tips based off what i do if i feel like im going to relapse)

-take really deep breaths, in for 5 out for 10

-try listening to music

-a warm beverage (i like my lemon and ginger tea with some warm honey and 2 sugars) it helps warm your body and ease tension (again at least it does for me)

-try to relax or take a nap, or dont nap and just lie down for a bit

-take a walk and really look at your surroundings. notice the little things. could be like how grass moves, different people you pass, shops/vendors around and the fonts on their store signs...etc,etc. notice how you breathe, the way you walk, what path you took...i dunno. thinking about other things works.

i have a certain playlist i listen to...or i have this really upbeat one with all my electronic/techno music and it just makes me feel good. like, i wanna move, i wanna do things, it makes me feel like i can take on anything. i can link the playlist but i recommend you organize something for yourself, something that makes you feel good.

so that playlist is here ->

please i beg you to listen to Angst and Overthinker from INZO, i swear, you feel that shit. and the Overthinker remix too, i think you'll like that one more...

its from my old account so im sorry its short but i can edit it anymore but basically another version of it is this one ->

(its actually got more songs its like almost 8 hours long, not my longest playlist)

so um...sorry for the long answer i just thought itd help...sorry again...

but yeah ig def listen to those songs...sorry if you dont like them jus trying to help...

#al was here!#hector estaba aqui!#ask #moot moot #vibe moot #<3 te amo /p #hope youre doing okay now #sorry for the late response

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